Consuela, just read the story!
No, no...
Please, it's of the utmost importance that you read it!
Uh, no... Messer Christopher Walken no here.
You don't understand, I'm not looking for Christopher Walken! Now, please... If you could just take this paper and-
No... No.
Plea-
No.
We'll give you a lifetime supply of lemon pledge!
Eh... Lemon Pledge? Okay... Si... Si...
Thank you! Now, just start from here...
-----
Messer Dovahkiin was-
STOP! Don't call him mister Dovahkiin. Just... Just read exactly what is says. Don't add anything else! Okay?
Eh, no... Si.
---
Dovahkiin was sitting on the bed next to Discord talking about his tale of how he was transported to the magical realm.
"And so I looked into the sky and saw my Alteration skill wasn't high enough. You know, because the sky apparently tracks everybody's skills."
"It does? I never checked while I was visiting. The only think the skies do here is rain on stuff and they need help by the Pegasi to even do that! It's a disgrace I tell you... Just like that thing over there." He pointed a claw at Twiman, who was busy doing push ups on the ceiling. Not only that, but she was counting backwards...
"She does have a sexy voice though..." Discord snapped his head at the Dovahkiin.
"What was that?"
"Oh, uh... Nothing." Discord smiled coyly and whispered into Dovahkiin's ear.
"Don't worry, she likes your voice as well." Discord smiled smugly as the Dovahkiin went wide eyed.
"I... I don't know how to respond to that." Before he could look at Discord, he heard Twiman's voice.
"Shh... Don't say anything." A quick look to the right revealed Twiman to be whispering to him from inside his horned helmet.
"I feel violated right now..."
"Good..." Now, just imagine Morgan Freeman saying that seductively. Have I ruined him for you yet? No? Okay then...
"Don't worry, Dovahkiin." He looked to Rainbow, who was still in ecstasy from the Diamond Dogs. "She's good at what she does."
"WHAT?!"
"Oh, I uh... I meant... I've never liked or done anything with Pinkie Pie or Twilight." Her face was now that of embarrassment. Discord simply smile and laughed.
"Oh, really? I was there... In the closet." Everyone looked at Discord with a look of judgement. Seeing this, he shrugged and started shuffling in place. "I regret nothing."
"What are you do-"
"TWIMAN, NO!" Unfortunately, it was too late... Twiman had already initiated the reference to the song.
"EVERYDAY I'M SHUFFLING!" In split seconds, everypony found themselves on the top of the train. Discord was now sporting a fancy Afro and skin tight pants along with a pair of rim glasses. How they got onto the roof so fast, nopony knows... He's Discord. It's like trying to explain Pinkie Pie!
"Equestria rock!" Dovahkiin looked around as the voice echoed out around him. All around, despite the wind, music began to play from nowhere. Actually, if he would have turned around, he would have seen Vinyl Scratch behind him playing it.
"Everypony just have a good time!" Discord began to sing to no one in particular. Twiman poked him and whispered into his ear.
"Just go along with it."
"What?"
"Go along with it!" Discord came to his side of the train doing the shuffle. Quickly, he imitated it and started shuffling as well.
"Equestria rock is on the rails tonight!" Discord hurled his leg, which was kind of cheating since he had wings. While he did that, the beat of the music picked up.
"Everypony just have a good time! And I gonna make you lose your mind, we just wanna see you..." The music stopped, causing Dovahkiin to sigh in relief.
"Thank Ysmir that's-"
"SHAKE THAT!" The music picked up again as everypony and the Discord started dancing like they were having a seizure. That went on for about fifteen seconds.
"On the train, Equestria rock.
"Lookin' for your mare? She in my flock. Nonstop, while we up the slope.
"Flank movin' weight like she at my stop.
"Where the flank? I gotta know, we clean, ain't you? Cause I gotta know." Discord threw the Dovahkiin into the air, causing him to pull a back flip.
"Half bright, half night, up we go. Up the mountain, here we go." Discord backed away as Twiman stepped up and took over.
"Yo, we runnin' up this pike like hey yo. I got that equestrian flow, got no snow, here we go! We Equestria rock, yeah. That's the mare that I'm stalking, on the rise to the top, no dread we Equestrian!" Dovahkiin started to feel tired from the random dance. There were now more ponies on the train that what looked even possible, but he assumed it was under Discord's control at the moment.
"Equestria rock is on the track tonight! Everypony just have a good time!" Twiman stepped back as Discord chimed in once more.
"Equestria rock is on the track tonight! Everypony just have a good time!
"Equestria rock is on this track tonight! Everypony just have a good time!" Both chimed in at the same time now. Honestly, Dovahkiin didn't know what was happening... He'd rather be getting graped by Twiman than this!
"And we gonna bucking steal yo mind! We just wanna see you..." The music stopped once more. Dovahkiin knew it wasn't over yet though...
"SHAKE THAT!" Everyone started shuffling, much to Dovahkiin's displeasure. If he could go another day without seeing that dance, he would die a happy man.
"Everyday I'm shuffling. Shufflin', shufflin."
"Step up fast and be the first one to make me throw these bits.
"We gettin' honey, don't be sad, stop. Grapin' is bad!" Twiman pushed Discord to the side and took over once more.
"One more colt for us, another pound! Please give me a buck, don't mess around!" Dovahkiin began to wonder what this song was about... Seriously, it makes no sense! We just wanna see you shake it now! Now you wanna be, your clothed now!" Both Discord and Twiman stepped back, Rainbow taking their place in the air.
"Get up, get down, put your hooves up in the air!" Everypony and the Dovahkiin started doing the seizure dance again. Actually, it was a pretty awesome sight... Rainbow repeated that line for about thirty seconds. After that, everyone, including the Dovahkiin, who was now into it, jumped in.
"Equestria rock is in the house tonight!" Discord threw Dovahkiin into the air, where all of the Pegasi formed a stage in the air that Dovahkiin was now standing on. Grabbing a microphone from seemingly nowhere, he finished the song.
"Put your hooves up! Everypony just have a good time! And we gonna make you lose your mind! Everypony just have a good, good, good time!" He gestured for the Pegasi to take him higher. Large speakers were now on either side of the Pegasi stage, broadcasting the song all over Equestria. The stage was overseeing the entire country of Equestria. He could even see all the way to the Crystal Empire. "Put your hooves up! Put your hooves up! Put your hooves up! Shake that!"
"Everyday we shufflin'!" He threw the microphone of the stage, where it eventually landed on Pip, who was just getting out of the hospital after the graping incident.
The stage lowered back to the train, the Dovahkiin getting back onto it right before they entered a tunnel. Nopony knows where the Pegasi came from, since they pretty much came from nowhere. Rumors state they were all hiding in Twiman's mane, but nopony knows the true story.
---
Consuela! Would you please quit cleaning and get back to reading?
Eh... No... No... Messer Christopher needs clean house.
No, he needs you to read!
No, no...
Well, I guess that's the end of that... Come back later when Christopher Walken is finished fixing his hair.