“Order up,” Anon shouted, placing a tray of carrot dogs, fries, and a shake on the takeout window.
Staving off the temptation to seal a fry from the order he’d just completed, he stuck his head outside and smirked. As he’d predicted, he and Celestia had been politely dismissed from the construction site before they could even make it off the lot. The good news was that the contractors had been insured, nopony had been hurt, and apparently the collapse had exposed a patch of unstable earth that could have caused problems later, but the bad news was - actually, there really wasn’t any bad news. As a mare skated by and smoothly picked up the tray beside him, a muted curse caught his ear.
Glancing to the side, out into the parking lot and past the waitresses tending to their customers, his eyes settled on an imposing figure. Though she was dressed in the same sort of uniform as her coworkers, Celestia stood out like a sore thumb - a curvaceous, buxom, clumsy sore thumb, but a sore thumb all the same. Kicking away from the counter, having at least a few minutes to spare before another order came rolling in, he spun on his heel and rolled through the kitchen and out into the cool, welcoming afternoon air.
“Doin’ alright, Cele?” he called, gliding over to her.
With a knitted brow and frown on her muzzle, she stared down at her feet. “To be honest, no…”
He came to a stop and snickered. “Come on, it can’t be that bad.”
“Why must I wear these blasted skates?” she griped, awkwardly stepping forward before wildly pinwheeling her arms and flapping her wings to keep balance.
“It’s part of the schtick,” he answered, waving to the half-dozen other waitresses weaving around cars. “Just remember the lesson I gave you earlier ~ see?”
Pivoting slightly, he shifted his weight from side to side and rolled around her. It was a miracle that the Fleeting Feed Bag, the old-style drive-in restaurant that had hired them, had attire and skates that actually fit her, although she was having a hard time getting the hang of being on wheels - to make matters worse, despite it being their first night on the job, she’d already had several customers specifically request her service. Circling and coming to a halt in front of her, he gave a little bow.
“Easy for - w…woah,” she faltered, losing her balance and toppling forward.
He acted out of instinct, shooting forward to catch her. Though he was able to prevent her from crashing against the pavement, his valiance came at a cost. His hands flew up and went wide, aiming to catch her shoulders, but they didn’t have a chance to make contact. A muffled grunt escaped him and his knees buckled, as his head was virtually entombed in her bust.
While he was no stranger to being around her, spending most of his days in her company, the unintentionally amorous contact wrought havoc upon him. A heady mixture of perfume and her delicate, natural aroma assailed his sinuses, the sensation of her soft, massive breasts against him were like a dream, and the sound of her anxiously laughing caused his heart to flutter. He knew it was an accident, that he should back away and apologize for the unbecoming gaffe, but every masculine urge in his body implored him to stay where he was.
“S…sorry about that,” she spluttered, righting herself and brushing a lock of hair from over her eyes.
As he stared up at her, his mouth went dry. The way her mane was done up in a ponytail, her striped shirt and skirt, the little apron she wore, and her snow-white leggings elevated her beauty in a humble way. Were she not a giantess with wings and a horn, she wouldn’t look much different than the other waitresses flitting about, but her chipper attitude, gorgeous face, and how she always tried her best were charming to a fault. Offering his hand, he turned away from her.
“You gotta slide,” he instructed, pushing off with one foot. “If you try to walk, you’ll - Celestia?”
A smile split her snout, her tail flicked behind her, and a look of determination filled her eyes. “I got it. Anon, stand back.”
He hesitated, staying where he was while shifting to face her. “Cele, please don’t do anything -”
Summoning her arcane might, she surrounded her lower legs with a golden aura, locked her legs, and began rolling around without moving a muscle. “Problem solved!”
It was a little strange to see her using skates in such an unconventional way, but he had to give her points for creativity - plus it was better than her busting her ass. Seeing a car pull in and park in one of the vacant spots, he glanced over at the abandoned kitchen. As far as he was concerned, she was free to use magic to get around until the end of her shift.
Skating away, he waved back at her. “Go get that car while I get back inside.”
“I’m on it, little buddy,” she tittered, waving her fingers at him.
Anon was little compared to her, and he’d like to consider them pretty good friends, yet there was something about the way she called him little buddy that evoked some very questionable impulses. Shaking impure thoughts from his head, he shot inside, returned to his post, and watched her through the window. She was a handful at times, more often than he cared to admit, but he was thankful that she’d taken a shine to him.
Rolling to the driver side of the vehicle that just parked, she pulled out a notepad and pen from her apron and started taking their order. The car was actually a newer model of Fjord Hingst, an open-top, V8 from the looks of it, and Anon could already tell that its passengers were going to be a problem. Instead of a family or a couple having come to eat, no fewer than four young, loud stallions were animatedly chatting with the ex-Princess.
Anon’s knuckles whitened as he gripped the window’s frame. He couldn’t hear what was being said, but he’d bet his bottom bit that they were making a pass at her - not that he could blame them. If some tall, voluptuous bombshell had come rolling up to his car in high school, he would have been hard pressed not to try and flirt at least a little bit. Tamping down his frustration, telling himself that she was a big mare and she could handle herself, he turned and froze when he heard a startled yelp.
He turned, looked back outside, and sneered. Celestia rolled away from the car, her face having gone beet red while rubbing her behind, as the car full of teenagers howled and joked with one another. It would have been impossible for him to say exactly what they’d done to her, but he was fucking pissed about it.
Having to hold himself back from going out to confront the group of boorish hooligans, he waited until she’d come to the window. “What’d they do?”
Celestia handed him the slip of paper, unable or unwilling to look him in the face. “It’s nothing, Anon…”
“What did they do?” he demanded, feeling his blood start to boil.
Apparently cued in by his menacing tone, she nervously looked at him. “Anon, it’s fine. The quicker they get their order, the faster we can forget all about it.”
He was willing to put up with all sorts of bullshit, but he wasn’t going to let a random group of assholes bully her. Whipping around and going to give them a piece of his mind, he found that he couldn’t move. As he glanced back and saw Celestia holding him by the wrist, he peered up at her in confusion.
“Really, it’s nothing to worry about -” she insisted, reluctantly releasing him, “if anything, it’s a bit flattering that they’d pinch an older mare’s bum.”
The only reason he didn’t go out and take a tire iron to the car and whichever prick had been brave or stupid enough to admit to accosting her was because that would get them canned, arrested, or both - nevertheless, to say he was incensed would be an understatement. Snatching up the order, he slapped the paper onto the hanger over the grill and set to quickly and haphazardly throwing the brutes food together.
One benefit of the diner’s setup was that most of the stuff on the menu was prepped in advance. Within just a few minutes, he’d made the burgers, mixed the milk shakes, and thrown some stale fries into a takeout bag, but he wasn’t about to let Celestia go back out by herself. Carrying the tray himself, he skated into the parking lot and over to the car.
“A…Anon,” Celestia called, inelegantly coming up behind him.
Ignoring her, he slowed and lifted the receipt. “Four number five meals and three milkshakes?”
“Yeah, that’s us,” the driver replied, looking past him and over to Celestia. “She new?”
“She is,” Anon fumed through a broad, forced smile. “Why do you ask?”
Lowering his shades, the driver motioned him closer. “Hey - uh - you wouldn’t know if she’s single ~ would ya?”
Anon shook his head and glared down at him. “No clue…”
“Perfect,” the stallion chuckled. Giving his friends a knowing glance, he leaned back and motioned to Celestia. “Hey, hot stuff, you wanna go for a spin? Trust me, this baby has all the horsepower a mare like you would ever want.”
Sliding up behind Anon, Celestia pressed her midsection to his back and used his head as a shelf for her rack. “I’m n…not currently looking for companionship, but I appreciate -”
“Shit, don’t tell me you’re with this - what even is this guy anyways?” the stallion interrupted, sneering at Anon. “Babe, come on, don’t pretend this weird monkey thing has anything ain’t got in spades!”
There was only so much bullshit that anypony, be they a pony or otherwise, could put up with - for Anon, after seeing and hearing the impudent teenager’s condescending treatment of Celestia, being demeaned in such a way pushed him well past his limit. He’d get in deep shit for starting something with a customer, but nopony could blame him if he had an accident. Falling forward with a smirk on his lips, he sent the burgers, fries, and milkshakes cascading all over the driver and the leather-lined interior of the prick’s precious vehicle.
“Whoops!” he laughed, pushing himself away and mopping himself off. “Oh jeez - oh man. I guess I better get you some napkins so you can - Glk?!?”
Bolting out of his car, the stallion snatched Anon up by the collar and lifted him from the ground. “Do you have any idea - any fucking idea who you’re messing with? I’ll fucking…”
A deathly silence fell over them, nopony moved a muscle, and an ominous, downright oppressive sense of dread settled on Anon. The development would have been foreboding in and of itself, especially since he’d never once felt genuinely threatened by any creature he’d met in Equestria before, and it only got worse when he looked behind himself. Shudderingly turning and following the stallion’s wide-eyed gaze, he gulped.
Though she’d barely budged, only stepping back a hair, the Celestia he’d grown so fond of was gone - replaced by something from a nightmare. Her eyes blazed with fire, the wrath of a star collapsing in upon itself, while darkness - no, an utter absence of light radiated from her. The Princess of the Dawn, the maternal alicorn of radiance and care, had become the embodiment of perdition.
“You’ll what,” she breathed, smoke and hellfire wafting past her clenched teeth and parting lips. Waiting for a response that never came, she placed a hand on Anon’s shoulder and lowered him to the ground. “Did you ever wonder why my tenure on the throne was so peaceful?” she pressed. As the now shivering stallion fretfully shook his head, she leaned forward and brought her muzzle to his ear. “It’s because I have no real enemies left to oppose me…”
The veiled threat, coupled with the absolutely pants-shitting display of malice did the trick. Dropping Anon, the insolent stallion scrambled into the car, threw it in reverse, and floored the gas. Though its engine roared and tires squealed against the pavement, spinning wildly, the vehicle didn’t move an inch.
Anon looked on in horror, watching as Celestia effortlessly lifted the car by its front bumper with a single hand. He’d seen some crazy stuff in his day, ranging from chimeric beings of pure chaos to castles fashioned entirely from crystal, but this took the cake by a wide margin. Unsure if he should intervene, he stayed right where he was.
“Would you like me to refill your order,” Celestia snarled.
“N…no!” the driver bleated.
Lowering the front of the car, Celestia lifted one leg and placed a foot on its fender. “Have a good night and come again…”
She gave him no time to reply, kicking the vehicle with enough force to send it careening out of the parking lot, across the street, and into a nearby tree. The rambunctious, disrespectful youths took the hint, peeling rubber and driving away in the then sputtering, heavily damaged car. It was anypony’s guess if their auto insurance would cover wanton, justly deserved damage from a former Princess, but Anon hoped it didn’t.
“You ok?” she softly inquired, trotting back to him.
Anon peered up at her in astonishment. It was like a switch had been flicked; one moment, Celestia was an avatar of fury - the next, she was back to her happy-go-lucky self. Somberly nodding, he removed his sullied apron and draped it over one arm. For the second time in short order, she’d rescued him from a sticky situation - even if it had surely cost them their jobs.
“C’mon,” he urged, lacing his fingers with hers and gently guiding her back to the diner.
“We’re going to get in trouble for this ~ aren’t we?” she sulked, walking alongside him.
“Yeah,” he resignedly confessed, “but it was worth it.” He looked up at the night sky and chuckled to himself. “Cele?”
Leaning against him and only slightly compressing his spine under her weight, she freed her hand and pulled him close. “Yes?”
“Was that true - ya know, about you not having any enemies left?” he faintly asked.
She giggled and rubbed his back. “It’s true enough. S…sorry you had to see that, it’s just that -”
“No,” he softly interjected. “No, it’s fine - hell, if I’m being honest, I thought it was pretty badass.”
With her cheeks darkening, she looked away from him. “T…think nothing of it…”
He stepped in front of her, lifted a hand to her chin, and turned her to look at him. “Celestia, really, thank you for that. I’m not gonna say I’d be able to fend off all four of ‘em if they jumped in, but you saved my bacon. Tell you what, once things have settled down, I’ll comb through the help wanted section of the paper and find a few things that you might enjoy ~ that sound alright?”
“That…that would be very nice of you, Anon,” she muttered. “Thank you for being so patient with me.”
“Don’t mention it,” he chirped, shifting and continuing along through the parking lot of aghast patrons and employees. “After everything you’ve done for me, it’s the least I can do!”
As the corners of her lips turned up, he grinned and tightened his grip on her hand. She’d screwed up at the hotel, she’d royally bungled the construction gig she’d had, and she hadn’t even lasted a single night at the drive-in, but he couldn’t have been happier. There were plenty of jobs out in the world, limitless possibilities for positions to take, but there was only one Celestia, no matter how fearsome she could be, and he wouldn’t have traded her for a damn thing…