Dull throbbing and blackness – Twilight gagged and bile rose from the pit of her stomach, burning the walls of her throat.
She could feel something warm on her back which wasn’t really doing much to ease the sharp pains that felt as if there were needles jabbing her everywhere. And there were other sources of agony as well – her stomach felt like a part of it had been torn out, and her eyes felt like they had been rubbed on with sandpaper.
What’s – going – on? Her thoughts were sluggish; it was like she was slipping in and out of conscious. The warm, soft object seemed to be touching her again, rubbing her along her neck and back.
“Twilight, do you feel better now?” The words reverberated in her ears slowly, not quite getting in. Then reality hit her.
Wait… what did I just do?! Her head still hurt and there was a bitter taste in her mouth, but slowly her thoughts started to sort themselves out. Did I just – what? Oh, no! She stared down at her hooves; Princess Celestia was going to punish her for this, she just knew it.
“Twilight?”
Twilight cringed upon hearing the gentle voice of her mentor, and only half registered that it didn’t sound angry at all.
Princess Celestia draped a wing over Twilight and nuzzled her, before levitating a glass of water over and holding it in front of the unicorn. “Here, have some water – are you feeling better now?”
Maybe this is the punishment. Maybe she’s going to make me drink a thousand glasses of water, or maybe she’ll shrink me and throw me inside –
Celestia looked at Twilight, her brow creased. Twilight gulped and hesitantly took the water in a shaky grasp, staring at it numbly before finally taking a sip. It washed through her, helping chase down the influences of the vile liquid in her system.
She peeked at the room; it seemed to be one of the side rooms. Had Celestia led her here? Hmm, maybe there’s still a chance I can get her feathers – Twilight blinked. This thought hadn't been accompanied by the swirling colors and strange sounds – it had been her own, which confused her slightly. But there were more pressing matters at hoof now; she had to try to make things right. I should apologize while I can…
“P-princess?” Twilight tentatively looked up, and Celestia met her eyes with a warm smile.
“Yes?” Celestia asked softly, and Twilight felt her heart fluttering, an unwelcomed blush creeping up from her neck to her cheeks.
Well, maybe it was because she was so nervous… and not about the apology. But about what, she wasn’t really sure yet. “I’m sorry,” she mumbled, her ears flattened.
Celestia leaned down and nuzzled her again. “It’s alright. You weren’t yourself, were you?”
Twilight bit her lip, unsure of how to respond. She remembered the things that she had done, but couldn’t understand why her thought process had been like that. The only thing that somehow made sense was wanting the princess’ feathers. The point wasn’t the feathers, she realized, but something else that had been hidden before…
“I don’t blame you,” Celestia continued when Twilight didn’t speak. She lit up her horn, pulling over a couch with telekinesis. “Just rest yourself, all right? I will just go check on the others, and then I’ll be right back.” The alicorn waited until Twilight pulled herself on the couch, then gave Twilight a reassuring smile before leaving the room.
Twilight buried her head in her hooves and whimpered. I should have controlled myself! And now everything’s just so messed up! The answer to why she had thought and done what she had was poking at her, but she tried to ignore it. It is because you –
She blocked out the thought, though not without a blush. I’ve always liked Princess Celestia, but just as a teacher, right? Yes, I just like her like that, nothing more… But she couldn’t convince herself – what had surfaced during her short period of intoxication couldn’t be buried.
But I can never tell her about it… or anypony else! Twilight scrunched up her eyes. It would be best to pretend that I don’t feel anything different from before. What the exact feeling was she couldn’t really say, but it felt so right to her, how she wanted to feel Princess Celestia’s feathers brushing against her, to be in that warm embrace, to feel those lips – Twilight shook her head. She’d never, ever accept my feelings.
And she hasn’t even blamed me for ruining Trixie’s show… Twilight winced. As a filly, as she started to learn more and more advanced magic, a rule of sorts that Princess Celestia had emphasized was to use magic in the right way. And I just went against that.
But she still didn’t understand why her mind had been in such a state the past hour or two. It could have been the drink, and she could not think of another option, but it’d seemed that none of the other ponies had been acting strangely. My behavior was inexcusable…
So why had the princess let her go so easily? Twilight couldn’t fight back the impulsive thought that she was still going to be punished later, but Princess Celestia had said she didn’t blame her and that everything was all right, and the princess never went back on her word.
Maybe her behavior was expected? If a pony was in that insane state of mind – was it possible that only she been under the influence? How did that happen, and how did my mind clear up? She shuddered; what if she hadn’t snapped out of it? Would she just have kept doing crazy things? Princess Celestia surely wouldn’t forgive her then, no matter what else she did, right?
An uneasy smile crossed her face. Perhaps, if she was ‘still’ under the influence, she could do things she normally couldn’t do, and she wouldn’t be judged like under normal circumstances…
--- --- --- ---
Celestia strode up to where the other ponies were gathered around a still confused Trixie. Satisfied that the showmare hadn’t been hurt, she turned to Luna.
“Luna, can I talk to you in private?” she asked in a low voice.
“Yes...” Luna nodded slowly, and followed Celestia to another of the side rooms. “Celestia, what is this about?”
“About Twilight,” Celestia said after a pause, “I know you might not have had any bad intentions, but…”
Luna looked down, eyes darting in every direction. “What are you talking about, sister?”
“Please, don’t do this, Luna,” Celestia said, almost pleadingly. “You know it hurts when you try to hide things from me.”
Luna stared down, biting her lip. Finally she looked up again, and took a deep breath. “It-It was I who p-placed a spell on Twilight’s glass.”
“I thought so,” Celestia said softly. “But why did you do that, Luna?”
“I, I just thought,” Luna drew a hoof on the ground uncertainly. “If I could s-somehow lower a few barriers I-I could tell her my feelings.”
“Oh Luna, I didn’t know that you had feelings for Twilight.” Celestia deliberated for a few moments, struggling to keep her expression calm. “But that… isn’t the way you tell a pony about it.”
“I know, sister,” Luna said in a choked voice, “but I just don’t understand why I did that…”
“Would you like to talk about it more?” Celestia asked gently. “I’ll try to help you the best I can; I’m just afraid you might have taken the wrong approach.”
“I-” There was a long pause, and Luna finally shook her head. “I really cannot now, Celestia, I need some more time to think…”
Celestia nodded, nuzzling her sister. “I’ll help her recuperate, then, but I’m afraid you will have to find a way to tell her about this yourself, after she is feeling herself again.”
Luna sighed, turning and trudging back to the main room without a further response. Celestia watched her sister leave, her expression unfathomable, before making her way to the room where she had left Twilight.