The Invisible Brony Defense Force

by SoullessDCLXVI

Antagonization

I just stared at the banner, or rather, two words on the banner. Lauren. Faust. I don't how long I was standing there, mouth agape. But it couldn't have been long because Syntax's reaction would later be described as "instantaneous".

"Fluttershy!"

"Eep!" Fluttershy managed to, at the same time, hide behind both her own mane, and Rarity. Though it wasn't needed. Syntax hadn't moved. He had merely gotten taller. Wait. What? Upon further inspection I noted that he had gotten purple aswell. His legs kicking in place underneath him as he tried to run at full sprint, his feet failing to find purchase. Following his arms, which were straight out in front and topped off by greedy, gripping at air, hands, I noticed Twilight's horn glowing above an expression of irritation and amusement. Ah, I see now. Good going Twilight.

"So, Pinkie. Are you gonna tell us what a 'La-rown fost' is? Or are we gonna hafta wait 'till another round o' monkey things show up in a falling metal can?" Applejack asked the ever smiling Pink demon.

"Nope! This is the only group of humans that we're waiting for." Pinkie smiled. I mean, smiled more. Okay, unless I say specifically, that she's frowning, let's just assume that she's smiling. And if I say she smiled... you get the idea. "And Lauren isn't a what silly, it's a who!"

"Well, who is it, darling?"

"She's my human friend from another world! We've been friends for twelve years, and three years ago she made a TV show about us. It's really good, too." turning away from the other mares present, she continued to speak to them though her eyes were glued to us. "I never thought I would get to meet real humans though! This is really neat!" Pinkie begun bouncing towards us, eyes running over our figures inquisitively while she made faces that an 8 year old would make in a mirror. Eventually, she sat down and looked at us sternly, though the smile was still there. I could tell that she was having a tough time keeping it off her face. Then she asked us what she tried to sound like a serious question. "Do you like bananas?"

"What?" I say dumbly. It occurs to me that this is the first time I've spoken to the Mane 6. Ah, good ol' first impressions.

"Do you. Like. Bananas?"

"Um, sure?" and then I kid you not, a friggin' paper bag with the Publix logo appeared at her side. She reached in and pulled out that megaphone and I just lost it. As did everyone else. The joke may have been old, but having it done by Pinkie Pie, not to mention in reality, was too much. Snake wet Hyena and fell like the rest of us, on his back. The high pitched laugh adding to our own. Pinkie couldn't help herself and followed suit. Well, she remained a pony. Every other pony, just stood there. Confused. And that, to me, was far funnier than the banana bag.

"Oh Pinkie, your fourth wall breaking skills are legendary." Arrow said, wiping a tear as his laughter began to subside.

"I didn't break the fourth wall, silly. I CAN'T break the fourth wall. Because there IS no fourth wall." Pinkie responded, killing our laughter.

"What?" said about three voices. Not sure whose.

"The fourth wall is when fictional characters know that they're fictional. I'm not fictional. I am as real as you. I just have a window into your dimension. As well as complete, total, absolutely whole access to the interwebs. By the way, you people are weird. But I like weird. And I'm very happy that me and my friends have become famous. All those smiles I brought! I could die happy."

"We're famous in another dimension?" asked Rainbow Dash. "Awesome! That must mean you guys are here to see me! Why else would you cross the dimensional divide?" she did a couple of mid-air backflips and was only met with stares of incredulity.

"What? I know some big words."

"That's not why we're-- what big words?" Twilight added.

Rainbow waved a hoof dismissively "Dimension, divide. yadda yadda. Had to look 'em up when I was reading Daring Do and the Curse of the Ancient Unicorn Mirror."

"Those aren't - whatever. Pinkie, how do you know all this stuff?"

"I told you, I'm friends with Lauren Faust. Creator of My Little Pony."

Before Twilight could repeat herself, I made my first full sentence in the conversation. "Yes, but how are you friends with her?"

"Oh. That's simple. I just cast a spell. We've been chummy ever since."

"But, dear. You're only an earth pony. How in Equestria could you cast spells?" asked Rarity, voicing Twilight's obvious curiosity.

"Oh. That.. um... You see, I'm the last of my kind, here in Equestria. The humans have a word for me."

"We do? What word is that?"

"Witch."

"Princess, it's been a week. No doubt your subjects are worried about you. With Luna in the woods your entire country has likely been in anarchy. Please. Go back to Canterlot. I will send you a letter as soon as I find Twilight or Luna."

"That's just it, Pink. Equestria needs me, now more than ever. I feel the threat. But like always, I still can't pinpoint it. Obviously Luna has something to with it, until I can find and subdue her. I am needed here. Besides, the Canterlot nobles can handle the governing fine. We just need to keep searching the Everfree. They can't hide for long."

Tragedy, unseen by Princess Celestia, floated next to Pink, her form largely transparent. "I got it!" She said, her voice more distant than her body and echoing off unseen walls. "Tell her that Luna has taken advantage of Celestia's absence and is now ruling over Equestria with a corrupted mind! Bah!" she hit her ghostly forehead with the palm of her equally ghostly hand. "Why didn't I think of that earlier. Once she sees how much her citizens need her she'll stay in the city and we can find the Soulless motherfucker ourselves and kill him like the bastard he is, right Pink!"

"Yeah, right. Of course." Celestia had gotten used to Pink's quirk of talking to himself. Unaware that he had gone insane with the loss of his sister and good friend. As the brain is opt to do, it coped in an unusual way. Externalizing his grief at the loss by projecting an image of his dead sister and the anger at his friend by making her the one to bear the rage. Now he was lead on his trip of revenge by a hallucination. Though he was convinced it was truly her. He was a sorcerer after all, if that kind of magic didn't let him see the dead, nothing would. "Um, Celestia. Luna is corrupted, right?"

"I know this, Pink. We've been over this."

"But the moon still sets to make way for your sun."

".... that it does."

"So if she's evil, but civil. Then it would make more sense that rather than outright attacking you to gain power, she would use subterfuge instead. And it's been a week since you've seen your throne. Maybe she's taken over completely by now."

With a gasp and a flash of golden light, the Solar princess disappeared. Leaving the Nordic Sorcerer to summon weapons and take a much needed rest. "When I find you Soulless, I will make you pay. And my sister will at last be able to rest in peace." and with yawn, he fell asleep.

Hours ago

Private Montgomery was admittedly nervous. Ever since he had gone through with his company a glowing, arcing blue sphere in the middle of Downtown Manhatten he had been nervous. The land he had found himself in was alien. And dangerous. The hills looked man made, the grass was purple, there were insects the likes of which he never seen, and more surprisingly, insects he was all too familiar with. One of which was drinking blood off of his face at the moment. With an audible slap he corrected the theft and continued walking with his company. A tank division that was behind another as they were headed to "Location Alpha." When it had been described to him he felt a wave of nostalgia hit him. It sounded just like Canterlot from a favorite cartoon of his. Though he didn't say anything. The other bronies may give him serious respect, but the other military he was with were nothing like that. Trudging through the field in the middle of the night he caught a glimpse of the city known to him only as Location Alpha. He gasped as he saw what was essentially a mirror image of Canterlot. Confident that he would see Canterlot perfectly were he looking form the other side.

One of his squad mates bumped into him in a motion that he read as, 'Why'd you stop. Keep moving.' but his ears registered a voice that said "Dude. Do you see what I see?"

Without thinking, he responded. "Canterlot." Realizing what he let slip he turned to his smiling squad mate in horror.

"Dude, brohoof?" Montgomery's fears fell, and he did the only sensible thing. He brohoof'd his new best friend.

"The similarities are striking. Why are we attacking this place again?"

"Apparently they're the ones that rendered Manhattan a waste land with that super radioactive bomb a few months back. We're here to kick some ass."

"I feel like this has been done before." Moore was about to respond when thier attention snapped back to the unit of tanks in front of them. A flash of red had damaged one of the tanks making a very familiar sound. "Was that Spartan Laser?"

"What's a Spartan Laser?"

"It's a weapon. From Halo."

"Oh. Then of course not. Those aren't real. You can't get attacked by things that aren't real."

"Really? Then explain that." Montgomery pointed to the tank unit a couple hundred feet in front of them. Where Superman and Iron Man had just fought. And lost.

"The hell?" a sudden roar resounded through the field as a green tyrannosaur erupted into being in front of them.

"HOLY HELL WHAT IS GOING ON?!?" Yelled Moore, shaking like a leaf. "Fire everything!" and he brought his M4 up to bear, screaming as he unleashed a hail of bullets into the impossible creature.

Present

Princess Celestia cried. She had expected the worst she would come back to was a power drunk Lunar princess. But instead, she had come to find an unrecognizable pile of rubble. She couldn't hear any screams, nor see any bodies. so she assumed that all her subjects had perished, thier bodies buried beneath the pulverized stone that was once Canterlot.

Princess Celestia cried. Her soundless sobs racking her body as her tears fell onto the unsightly grave of her beloved ponies. She stayed this way for hours as her thoughts came and went like surf at a beach.

'My dear ponies, you did not deserve such a fate.'

'How dare she! Luna will pay for her crimes.'

'It's not her fault, she was corrupted, again.'

'It was the fault of those damned humans!'

'Oh, I'll never forget you all, I loved you all so much.'

'I swear on my own name and that of the Goddess, I WILL return Luna to me. And when I do, I will personally kill every single human who dared touch Equestrian soil! They will fear me, and they will pay with thier lives!" at that she stomped a forehoof, her eyes went gold and a brief burst of flame engulfed her as her rage became momentarily physical. When she did, she heard a gasp. To her left was one those humans she had just mentioned. A female wearing the same pattern as those that had come to Canterlot over a week ago. Looking behind the female, Celestia spotted several more humans wading through the ruins. At the sight, she smiled. A very malevolent smile that caused the female to wet herself. And the the Solar Princess went to work. Gleefully and brutally murdering the infantry unit that had been sent to secure the site. She danced on her hind legs as she cast her magic about. Telekinetically grabbing hold of organs and body parts and ripping them off their perspective owners. Crushing skulls beneath her hooves and impaling bodies and cloth on her horn. Maddeningly licking at the blood that fell to her lips. She cackled at thier screams and tore the legs off those who tried to run. There were two who bowed to her the moment they saw her, despite what she was doing to thier brethren. But despite the show of loyalty, they were still human. And she crushed them as well. She could see the look of betrayal on the one's face as she snuffed the life of his friend. She loved the anguish in his scream, confused though, as to why he screamed 'more'. Though she happily obliged him, and ripped his head off his shoulders, taking a section of bloodied spine with it.

When the last human fell, she gazed over the rubble once more. Now fittingly filled with bodies and painted dark red with drying blood. She licked her lips and felt the pain of her loss subside a little. It would take a lot more human deaths to make it go away entirely, she doubted the number she needed was even available to her in Equestria. Plans would have to be made to arrange a trip beyond the limits of her knowledge so that she might one day be satiated. For now, there were a host of creatures in the Everfree that might point her in the right direction to her sister. She hoped that they would be unwilling to speak, as there were some interrogation techniques she hadn't used in millenia that she would like to bring back.