“Good bye everypony… I’m sorry I ruined your lives… Forgive me…” An almost serene smile broke out on the cyan mare’s face and she pushed off from the cliff’s edge.
Rainbow Dash jumped from the edge and plummeted like a stone; wind trailed through her knotted mane and ruffled her immobilized wings. As she turned and twisted through the buffeting air that roared past her, she glanced up at the rocky ledge she had just leapt from.
It seemed the meds were making her hallucinate now because through her tear blurred eyes and the medicated haze she was in, Rainbow Dash could have sworn she saw a figure standing on the ledge.
“RAINBOW DASH, NO!!!”
The blurry figure leaped from the cliff and wings spread out to rocket the figure towards Dash. She felt the mystery pony grab her tight and with a grunt of effort pull her out of her suicidal plunge. The cyan mare struggled, but the pills she had taken beforehoof had left her to feeble to put up any substantial resistance.
“N-no… Let… Let me go… I have to do this…” Dash mumbled as her vision grew darker and darker and she slipped into unconsciousness.
“It’s okay Dash, I’m gonna get you help, just stay strong.”
2 Days Later, Ponyville Hospital, Suicide Watch Unit
Beep… Beep … Beep… Beep…
It was an incessant noise through the haze in her mind. It was familiar, she knew that much, but where had she heard it before? Rainbow Dash wrenched her eyes open, blinking in the bright light of her sterile white room.
A Hospital. She was in a hospital, but not just any part of the hospital, no, she was in the wing for suicidal ponies who needed to be watched and kept in a “safe and relaxing” environment. This was just what she needed.
“Another freaking way for life to kick me while I’m down. I can’t even suicide right!” Dash rasped, her voice slightly scratchier than usual from lack of use. “But… How did I get here? Who caught me?” She wondered out loud, as if voicing the question would bring an answer.
“I… I did Dash; I saved you and took you here. You’ve been out for 2 whole days, and I was getting worried.”
Dash looked over to see a very familiar face, Spitfire.
“I mean, not that I wasn’t worried before! I was freaking out the whole way here too, and with you not waking up I thought maybe you’d ne-” Spitfire started rapid firing explanations till she was cut off by the hoarse voice of the cyan mare in the sterile white bed.
“Why? Why did you do that? I wanted to die Spitfire; I needed to die so I could stop ruining everypony’s life!” Rainbow Dash glared at the confused mare in her hospital room with tears starting to stream down her face.
“Ruin everypony’s lives? Dash, you make my life better just by being alive! You don’t ruin anypony’s lives; you make them better because they get to have such a great friend!” Spitfire protested, standing up and waving her hooves to emphasize how serious she was. “So you may have messed up a few times, big deal. We all mess up sometime in our lives I messed up big time by not telling you sooner…” The fiery pegasus’s voice tapered off as she looked abashedly at the cyan mare before her.
Dash tilted her head, a puzzled expression taking over her damp face. “Tell me what sooner Spitfire?”
Spitfire looked up at Dash with a sad smile. “I guess it started back when I first saw you at the Young Flier’s Competition. You were so brave and strong, and the way you flew, oh Celestia! It looked so free and spirited, like there was nothing that could catch you; it reminded me of why I joined the Wonderbolts in the first place, the joy of flying.” She closed her eyes and smiled wider.
“It was exhilarating, I wasn’t actually knocked out by your friend, she just hit a nerve and I sort of froze up, but I saw the Sonic Rainboom, felt the rush of speed again, and it made me feel more alive then ever before! To be honest, I was thinking about ending everything that day, but you changed all of that, you changed me Dash.” She leaned back in the chair and sighed remorsefully.
“But I was too chicken to talk to you about how you made me feel, I wasn’t sure if it’d freak you out or not, so I just stayed quiet. I had a crazy crush on you since then Rainbow Dash, and it’s only gotten more and more serious. I love you Dash, I have for a long time. You’re strong, brave, loyal, an amazing flier, and b-beautiful when you’re unconscious.” Spitfire almost choked on the last part and a furious blush spread like flames on her face.
Rainbow Dash couldn’t speak, this was nothing she could ever have seen coming. Her idol, having a crush on her was incredible enough, but actually loving her? Impossible, it had to be some cruel joke at her expense. She growled and shut her eyes, as if she didn’t feel crappy enough.
“Shut up! You don’t love me, you’re just trying to play a sick bucking joke on me and I ain’t gonna take it! Nopony has ever or will ever love me; I’m a failure and a waste of space, and you!” A shaking hoof pointed at Spitfire. “You ruined the only shot I had at making things right for once!”
“Dash, listen to me, I really do love you! I’m not playing a trick on you or anything, I’m being honest, you gotta believe me.” Spitfire exclaimed pleadingly. Dash reached for the buzzer on her bed and smashed a hoof against it and a few seconds later a lavender unicorn rushed into the room wearing a white coat.
“Is everything alright Miss Dash?”
“No, please get this pony out of my room.” Dash answered flatly, and the nurse nodded towards the door.
“I’m afraid you have to leave now ma’am, we can’t have you upsetting Miss Dash, she’s in a delicate state.”
Spitfire lowered her head sadly and trotted to the door. “I‘m glad you‘re okay...” With one last longing glance at the mare of her heart’s desires, she reluctantly left.
Once she was alone in her room again, Rainbow Dash snorted. “Love me? Nopony loves me…”
The look in Spitfire’s eyes danced in her mind. The conviction in her eyes was too sincere to be faked; it looked like there was a fire behind her eyes, possible proof of the idea that Spitfire loved her. “And she did rescue me… What if…” Dash felt like she had been bucked in the chest by a Windigo.
“Oh Celestia… What if she actually loved me? I just drove her away… I bucked up again big time…” Dash slumped down in the bed, another brilliant failure to add to the list.
2 Weeks Later, Ponyville Hospital, Suicide Watch Unit
Dash stared dejectedly at the white wall across the room, as she had done for the past few weeks since Spitfire’s confession. She couldn’t do anything but wallow in self-pity and beat her self up inside as she played snatches of the scene over and over in her mind.
Dash, you make my life better just by being alive!
“How? All I ever did was make things worse and push everypony away…”
I love you Dash, I have for a long time.
“Then why didn’t I notice? We always talked for a bit whenever… Whenever he brought me with him to a show… Celestia, was I really that blind…?” Now that she thought about it, Spitfire did always seem to be more jittery and tenser when she was around, but never seemed to be put off by the fact she had been a downer since the untimely death of her daughter.
“I‘m glad you‘re okay...”
“She sounded so sad and happy… And I was a jerk to her, just like everypony else who tried to be nice…” Dash’s shoulders sagged and she hung her head, a tired sigh escaping her lips.
“DASH! DASH! IT’S SPITFIRE!”
The door to her room burst open and the very mare she had been thinking about barreled in and was shortly tackled by two of the hospital’s staff. The orange pegasus struggled beneath the two orderlies who were fighting to drag her out of the room. One of the orderlies, a muddy brown earth pony looked at her in what looked like an apologetic manner.
“Sorry about the intrusion ma’am, but she kicked Johnson in the… Well she kicked him where it hurts most and threw this delirious pink pony at me. We have the situation under control now, and will remove this pony immediately from your room.” The orderlies began to drag the writhing Spitfire away and Rainbow Dash almost didn’t react from the pure shock of what had happened. She shook her head and called out a little shakily.
“N-no, that’s fine, I need to talk to her anyways…” Dash looked at Spitfire who had stopped moving and was staring back at her with wide eyes.
The orderly that had addressed her frowned, but nodded and motioned for the stallion who must have been Johnson to release the Wonderbolt captain. “Very well ma’am, just buzz if you need her escorted out later.”
The two orderlies left and Spitfire got up from the ground, looking a little embarrassed at her antics. “Dash, I know you must hate me and all, and I know you told the hospital ponies not to let me in, but I had to say I was sorry for what happened last time, I shouldn’t dumped my feelings on you right after something that big, it was stupid of me and I get it if you never want to see me again.” Spitfire said as she shifted uncomfortably from hoof to hoof.
“I don’t hate you Spitfire… And I should apologize too; I was way out of line, treating you like that. It’s just… after everything with Soarin, I didn’t think anypony would ever really love me, or ever did in the first place.” Dash all but whispered, and when Spitfire opened her mouth to say something, the cyan pegasus raised a hoof to silence her.
“I’ve been thinking a lot lately… About what you said that day, what you did, what I did… I don’t know if I can love anypony easily anymore, but…” She paused as if afraid to continue. After a few moments of deafening silence, Dash looked at Spitfire with eyes that held years of pain and heartbreak, the eyes of a mare who was frightened by herself and what might happen to her if she let anypony in.
“But I think… That maybe… We can see where it goes…” She smiled slightly and Spitfire just blinked in stunned silence.
Spitfire swallowed nervously and trotted to Dash’s bedside and looked at her with hopeful eyes. “R-really?”
Dash nodded and Spitfire threw her forelegs around the pegasus she had dreamed of being with for years now in a tight, tear filled hug. Dash looked taken aback and gingerly put her own forelegs around Spitfire and felt a soft warmth she hadn’t felt in a long while.
“I can’t say I love you right now Spitfire and I don’t if I’ll be able to for a long time, but I’ll give it a shot… Ok?” Spitfire just nodded and hugged her tighter, and she could feel a damp spot forming on the front of her gown where Spitfire’s head has buried into, and Dash felt tears threatening to show in her eyes as well.
But that didn’t matter, she felt safe now, she felt like a weight had come of her shoulder and that maybe, Celestia willing, that she could be happy once more.
Still, one thing had been buzzing in the back of Rainbow Dash’s thoughts the last two weeks, and she had to have answers.
“Spitfire, I know why you saved me… from myself… But how did you know where I was? I didn’t tell anypony what I was going to do…”
Spitfire let go of Dash and climbed onto the bed beside her and took a deep breath. “Well, I was planning on confessing to you the day you jumped, and the night before, I went to your friends Twilight Sparkle and Fluttershy and asked them for advice or anything they could offer. We talked for a while and it was getting dark by the time we finished, so I was going to wait till the morning to tell you, but Fluttershy said that you could use something happy as soon as possible, so I flew over to your place and…”
2 Weeks And 2 Days Ago, Rainbow Dash’s Cloud House
An orange pegasus with a fiery mane touched down on to the porch of Rainbow Dash’s home in the skies above Ponyville. She looked a little nervous as she knocked on the door and waited for a response.
“Man, this is making me so bucking jittery, why is it this so hard? All I have to do when Dash opens that door is look her in the eyes and say it. That’s all, Twilight and Fluttershy said it would be fine, that this wouldn’t blow up in my face.”
“But what if she doesn’t feel that way about me?” Spitfire gulped, stricken with panic at all the possible ways this could screw up. “Oh hay, I’m so dead, she’s gonna hate me and never speak to me again!” The panicking pegasus drew in a deep breath to calm her frayed nerves. “Come on Spitfire, if you can be the captain of the Wonderbolts, you can sure as hay talk to a mare.”
Spitfire waited patiently, but when no response came, she began to feel a little worried.
“It’s way too quiet… Maybe I should go in and make sure everything’s okay…” She bit her lip and hesitates a moment before pushing the door open. The orange mare stepped inside and looked around, gasping at the sight she was met with.
The whole house was in disarray, furniture had be overturned and shredded, photos in frames were smashed in pieces, and there were empty cider bottles all over the floor along with a large assortment of other items. The only thing that seemed okay in the room was a small coffee table with a wrinkled piece of parchment on top.
Spitfire smoothed out the letter and began to read whatever had been written on it.
To My Friends,
I’m sorry I made you put up with me fro so long, I never meant to ruin things for you all. I can’t live like this anymore, the guilt from what I did to Fluttershy and the pain of losing my daughter and husband are tearing me up inside, and I need to end the suffering, not just mine, but the suffering of everypony who was affected by my screw ups.
Twilight, I only called you an egghead because I was always kind of jealous of how smart you were, you knew everything and always had an answer to save the day. Pinkie, you’re so random, and everypony loves you for it, I’m sorry about telling you I hated your snacks the last time you visited, they were amazing. Applejack, you were always my best friend, you made me push my limits and break past them, you were the one who deserved to win the Iron Pony competition and I know you’ll be the best athlete in Equestria. Rarity, you always looked great no matter what we were doing or what happened, and even though I always said I didn’t care about frilly stuff like that, I was jealous of how good you looked all the time, I’m sorry for called you a prissy stuck up snob and tearing up the dresses you made for me. Fluttershy, oh Celestia, I’m so sorry, I was a terrible friend to you most of all, you were always there for me, through flight school and through life in Ponyville, and I feel like garbage for hitting you when all you did was try and help me, you can be brave, I know it, and you can be a great flier too, just believe.
I’m going to jump from Pegasus Plunge when Celestia raises the sun, so you won’t have to worry about me bucking everything up anymore. This is my gift to you and all of Equestria, please forgive me for what I did.
R.D.
Spitfire felt her heart lurch in fear. Pegasus Plunge was no joke, littered with jagged rocks, a wrong move could cost you, and anypony bent on jumping without flying off was guaranteed a painful death.
“I have to stop her… I have to stop her!” Spitfire shouted in a panic, bolting out the door and rocketing towards the cliff Rainbow Dash had said she was going to jump from.
After what seemed like an eternity had passed, Spitfire reached the cliff, but nopony was in sight. She felt a wave of cold wash over her and ran to the edge, and screamed when she saw the limp form of a cyan pegasus twisting through the air as she fell.
“RAINBOW DASH, NO!!!” Spitfire launched herself off the cliff and dived to catch Rainbow Dash before she hit the ground. Her heart was racing and pounding in her head as she reached out to grab the suicidal mare, and with more effort than she had ever put into her flying before, Spitfire pulled up from the deadly dive, inches away from the jagged rocks below. She made a beeline for the nearest hospital and clutched the feebly struggling body in her forelegs tighter to herself and whispered in her ear.
“It’s okay Dash, I’m gonna get you help, just stay strong.”
Present Day, Ponyville Hospital, Suicide Watch Unit
“The doctor said all the medication you took would have caused you to die from overdosing if I hadn’t brought you in when I did… I was so scared; I thought I’d lose you before I even had a chance to have you as a real part of my life…”
Dash pulled her legs closer to her body and hugged herself, shaking slightly, and Spitfire could hear faint sobbing.
“But now you’re safe, and I’ll do whatever I can to make you happy again Dash, I swear.” Spitfire said determinedly, bringing Dash in for another hug, which she immediately reciprocated, wrapping tight around the orange pegasus.
“Th-thank you Spitfire… I almost made the worst mistake of my life, but you stopped me, and I can’t thank you enough…” Dash looked up into Spitfire’s eyes, a grateful look in her tear filled eyes.
Spitfire smiled warmly and bent her head down to place a small kiss on the cyan mare’s forehead. “Just saying you’d give me a chance was all the thanks I needed Dash.”
“Awwwwwwwwwwwww! That’s so super duper adorably cute!” A chipper voice cried out from the door and Dash looked back to see all of her friends trotting into the room.
“Pinkie Pie, Ah told you not to go barging in before ya knocked, what if those two had been doin’ somethin’ more than kissin’?” Applejack scowled slightly at the pink earth pony bouncing up and down excitedly.
“See? We told you it would be fine Spitfire, we’re all happy for the both of you.” Twilight Sparkle said, with just a hint of her trade mark I-told-you-so tone.
Fluttershy smiled softly at the pair on the bed. “You two make a wonderful couple. You really deserve each other, not that you can’t have anypony you want that is…”
“At least somepony gets the mare of their dreams…” Spike sighed wistfully, and Twilight thumped him on the head, earning a glare from the young dragon.
“Just let me know when you need wedding gowns, alright darling?” Rarity winked at Rainbow Dash conspiratorially, the latter of which sputtering and blushing.
Spitfire chuckled and stroked her love’s mane to calm her down. “We’ll keep that in mind, but we’re going to take it slow till Dash is comfortable.”
“I’m glad to see all of you and everything, but why are you here?” Dash asked, tilting her head in confusion.
“I asked them to come with me Dash, I thought maybe seeing your friends would help you out a little, and Pinkie Pie was more than happy to help distract that orderly for me.” Spitfire admitted sheepishly. There was a round of agreements from the ponies that had come to see Dash.
Dash wiped at her eyes and sniffled slightly. “You… You guys are the best friends a pony could ask for…” She held her arm out and her friends all gathered in for a group hug.
Later That Night, Ponyville’s Library
“Spike, take a note. It’s for the Princess, and it needs to be sent out immediately.” The lavender librarian said, and Spike rushed to grab a quill and scroll.
“Aye, Aye Miss Sparkle!” The green and purple baby dragon saluted Twilight and pressed the quill to the scroll.
“Dear Princess Celestia,
A dear friend of mine learned a very important lesson about friendship today. Sometimes things seem impossible for us to handle alone, and we may see no way around it but to give up. That’s when the best thing to do is to let your friends help you, no matter how hard it may seem to open up about your problems, because if you don’t, it can lead to disastrous consequences, such as losing a friend for good. Accepting help can be difficult, but it just might save a life.
Your Faithful Student,
Twilight Sparkle.”
Author’s Notes And Apologies
First off, I have to say I’m a little unsure as to how well I pulled this ending off, and I hope you all let me know just how it made you feel.
And oh my gosh! I’m so sorry! I kept worrying about all of you while I was on vacation and whether or not you hated me for leaving this story unfinished, I wish I could hug all of you and I hope this makes up for it in some small way. It took awhile to get this chapter up because of personal issues that I will not go into detail with.