Jace was reading the notebook lying before him, trying to figure out what the hell was going on in this castle. He heard someone approaching behind him and he spun around quickly with a smile on his face.
"Alex I was worried- wait you're not Alex," Jace said jumping into a defensive stance.
"Do I look like a chick," I replied while rolling my eyes.
"Well... no... but who are you and what do you want," Jace said jumping back into his stance. I chuckled.
"Well I guess you could call me the creator... or your father, after all, I did create you."
"My father died before I was born, my mother told me that before she died." Jace said in a more threatening tone.
"Son, I don't even have a name for your father, I just said he died to make you an orphan. It would give you more of a darker background than the happy-go-lucky child; add a bit of drama of you will. Maybe a tad bit cliché, but what are you going to do about it."
"You just called me 'Son," Jace said grinding his teeth together. I just sighed.
"It's an expression, instead of saying 'who's your daddy,' it implies that I am your father, more of in a mocking way. Now back to the topic at hand what's your father's name."
"I don't know... My mother just called him my father..."
"Exactly. I suck when it comes to original names that actually have a balanced amount of vowels and consonants and sound somewhat like a name, I suck. Go ahead try and think of a original name," I said matter-of-factly. It took Jace a couple of moments before he said something.
"Mazamis... That's all I got."
I slapped Jace across his face.
"Ow, what the hell was that fo-"
"FOOL! Mazamis is my name... and it's the only original name I can think of," I said sadly. Jace just had 'dude, what the fuck' look on his face.
"Anyways," I continued, "I have come here today because it's my birthday, and I felt like fucking with my reader’s heads." Jace kept the same look on his face.
Suddenly, Griffin the Griffin ran into the room, one of his wings scorched black from the countless battles he had with dragons, the other replaced with a mechanical one that had a chainsaw attachment on it.
"Happy birthday Mazamis, I just wanted to say that you're awesome and the best writer ever," Griffin said excitedly.
I knew that I wrote him to say that just to stroke my ego and it wasn't true, (except for it being my birthday) in fact, Blackwing will probably kill me because I’m actually using his character without permission… but meh, fuck it, it’s my birthday. Jace eyed Griffin up and down, shifting his gaze to the mechanical wing before saying,
"Who the hell is this guy?"
I smirked. "Well, I guess you could say that," I pulled a pair of sunglasses out of nowhere and putting them on, "He's... Blackwing."
A sudden voice could be heard even though it didn't have a source.
"YYEEEAAAHHH."
I stood there with the stupidest grin only an idiot would have on their face. The smile turned to a frown when there was a knock on a door that wasn't there before because I conveniently wrote it in. I opened the door slowly to see a person wearing a pair of robes with a book in their hand.
I knew what these monsters were. They were rare, but it was best to hide in your home and act like you weren't there before they would move on, looking for another prey. The abomination ran into the room before I could even slam the door shut and run. It had us trapped.
"Hello, I would like to see if you would be interested in learning and possibly becoming a Jehovah Witness," It spoke. None of us understood what it said, but we knew it was most likely taunting us before it went in for the kill.
Luckily we were saved by my friend, Babadoo, when he came crashing through the the stone wall.
"Hey man, we totally need to make an awesome theme song for that kick ass fanfic you're totally going to write, it's going to the the shiiit dawg," he said to me while his arms wiggled around in the air like a snake.
"Hellz to the yeah," I shouted back wiggling my arms around as well. That’s when N (aka Dubby) walked through the door, his eyes wide with excitement.
“Hey Maz, I got that shipfic between Lulz and a pillow that you requested, it will take a day or two before it gets approved through, now will you buy me Skyrim,” Dubby pleaded. The grin on my face should not have been humanly possible. Jace, having no logical explanation of what the fuck was going on, just snapped right there. He pointed at all of us.
“I DON’T KNOW WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON BUT FUCK THIS. FUCK YOU, FUCK YOU, FUCK YOU, YOU’RE COOL.”
You could hear almost a sort of dinging noise as Griffin smiled and gave Jace a thumbs up. Finally Jace pointed his finger at me, his hand shaking in frustration.
“AND FUCK YOU, GOD DAMNIT.” He threw his hands into the air as he walked past us, knocking over the imaginary camera that lets you, the reader, imagine what is happening in your head. With you view now on the ground and on its side, you can’t see Jace mumble something about, ‘Fucking shit damn ass stupid fucking shit fuck…’ as he walked off, leaving the four of us to shrug and start beating the shit out of the Jehovah Witness.
A/N:
Hey guys, this is a troll chapter, mainly because i wanted a clever way to say its my birthday while doing stupid shit that will get me sued and mind fucking you guys to the point where you are like, why am i following this again... that means that im not even rereading this like three times to check for mistakes... anyways this is not canon with my story, i will delete this chapter when the next one comes out... oh well, oh and yes, Dubby is making me a shipfic between IBringDaLulz and a pillow after one night when i was in a livestream with him and he showed us a video of him making out with a pillow, i told him i was going to write or get someone else to write a fan fiction that shipped the two, oh and im going to be releasing two new fics, in one im going to get a shit ton of cliche ideas and mix them together and try to make an interesting story, more of a challenge to me, the second fic is a crossover with the game The Binding of Isaac, its more so of Twi being in Isaac's place instead of actually crossing over the universes, oh and im going to need a cover art for that, like anyone good with photo shop because i was thinking it being like the title picture of the game but having twi huddling in the fetal position instead of isaac, and replacing the word isaac with friendship but meh what can i do... anyways... yea... happy birthday to me... :foreveralone: