ApplePears

by TheMajorTechie


Hey Apple, hey, hey!

Applejack wiped the sticky pear juice from her muzzle, mentally gagging at what she realized that she had just eaten. She then gazed back up, squinting through the vast expanse of nuclear wasteland that was once Equestria.

"Hey Apple!" a voice suddenly yelled, "Hey!"

Startled, Applejack turned to face the source of the voice. Except there wasn't anything. Unless you count the orange with a face screaming, "HEY APPLE" at her.

"Darn radiation," the mare grumbled as she began her trek back towards her bunker, "always brings the worst outta the fruits."

"Hey Apple, I heard that you lived with oranges!" the orange said again, this time from the pony's back.

"ACK!" Applejack screeched in surprise, "Git off mah back!"

"But I thought an Apple a day keeps the doctor away!" the orange snarkily replied.

"How does that even relate to what Ah just said?"

"..."

"Exactly."

The mare continued towards her bunker, the orange still clinging to her back.

"Hey Apple," the orange began again.

"What." the mare replied, mentally debating on how bad the orange might taste.

"KNIFE!" The orange shouted again, hopping off Applejack's back.

Just as the mare gazed up, a broadsword from the hammerspace landed beside her, a disembodied hand still clutching to it.

"WHAT. THE. BUCK."

"Hey Apple!"

"FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF--"

"NO SWEARS!" Pinkie suddenly shouted, bursting from Applejack's mouth.

The world proceeded to crumble upon itself because the Annoying Orange made it give up on existing.