Authors Note: This chapter is set a couple of days after the last chapter, and it dose reference this time skip in the chapter, but I thought I would warn you guys before the chapter started.
I don’t even know what to think anymore, it feels like just yesterday I was almost sentenced to life in prison, almost turned to ash, and forced to have a cute dragoness named Barb start living with me as my quote en quote warden. Wait, that didn’t happen yesterday, it happened two days ago. I swear I lose track of time way too easily. I wonder if that happens to Barb. Speaking of the dragoness I really need to stop calling her cute, beautiful, and pretty both in my mind and out loud. Not just because if she takes it the wrong way she could beat me to a pulp, but because of the fact that her mother, and sister, are what amount to deities in both stature and power. It would not be fun to get on their bad sides.
Where is Barb anyway, she had some stuff moved into the guest room earlier today, but after that I haven’t seen head nor tails of her. Not that I was looking at her tail specifically! Well, maybe I was a little, but only for… I don’t know what for. Dose that constitute as a sign that I have a crush on her, or that I’m a horrible pony with little to no respect, because if it is then I am thoroughly screwed. Though I’ll deal with that problem later, probably, but as for right now I need to find Barb. If she went down to the workshop, which I highly doubt, then I need to find her fast, but first I’m going to check the main floors rooms, and the upstairs two little bed rooms. Well, she isn’t in any of the downstairs rooms, so by process of elimination she must be either in her room, or in my lab. So I walk up the stairs and just as I turn the corner the bathroom door opens, and so I found Barb. In nothing but a towel.
The problem, that wasn’t there before now, is when she saw me she started to run, but the towel caught on the door handle. I’m pretty sure the instant the towel left her body, both of our faces became tomatoes, and so now I’m left in the middle of the hallway with an internal struggle of thinking about what I just saw, what’s going to happen if her mother finds out, and what in Tartarus I’m supposed to say the next time we talk. Though I’m not going to lie, she looked nice… dammit!
I sit on my couch, glancing at the clock and stairs periodically for how much time has passed since the…incident that occurred upstairs, and to see if Barb is coming downstairs. I look back at the clock; Barb’s been upstairs for over an hour. I really hope that I didn’t offend her by looking, not that I could have stopped myself, it happened too fast. Though, and I do feel bad for her and thinking this way but, why would she be offended? Again I hate myself for thinking this way, but she shouldn’t be offended, it’s not that she looks bad or anything, she actually looks really nice. And now I’m back to thinking about her body, crap. Well, time to use my best mental strategy I know, so all I do is think orange, monkey, eagle. I do this repeatedly for a while until I hear footsteps descending down the staircase.
Well there she is, now dressed in a pair of baggy black sweat pants and a red t-shirt, but what really catches my attention is the fact that she looks unsure of herself. If how she shuffles oddly to the recliner, and avoids my gaze is anything to go by. Once she sat down, neither of us could meet each other’s eyes or start to speak because…well how is one supposed to start a conversation after what happened without it being awkward? It’s not like I could just say, ‘Hey, I know I just saw you naked and your really embarrassed, but if it’s any consolation I think you look really nice, and I may or may not have a crush on you right now.’ Now that would make things a whole lot more awkward than it already is. So I do the only thing that I can, and have been doing a lot lately. “I’m sorry Barb. About y-you know, what happened, I was just wondering where you were and it was my fault-“
Before I could finish that sentence though, Barb cuts me off. “I-it wasn’t your fault, I shouldn’t have freaked out and ran when I saw you, I..uh might have over reacted a bit. Maybe.” At this point both of our faces are full blown red, but other than that it’s not going as bad as I thought it would, but now all I have to worry about is an angry mother slash deity reducing my entire body to ashes. "And, uh, can we keep what happened between the two of us? If my mom found out…I don’t want to know what’ll happen to us. Especially you, given that your already on my moms, and the law’s, bad side. I, um…heh, don’t really want you to get hurt. I mean, you don’t seem like a bad pony, just extremely short sighted.”
Well color me surprised, or whatever color is used to make someone look surprised, she actually doesn’t want to tell her mother, and she might actually care for me if the renewed blush on her face is anything to go by. “Um, sure, I’m not about to tell.” Seeing that I’d probably be reduced to ash if Celestia did find out. “Heh, this kind of reminds me of one of my encounters while out on the job. I was in a bar in one of the Zebra tribes, and there was a zebra in the back booth getting chewed out by, who I found out later his girlfriends mother, about him seeing her daughter naked before marriage. Poor guy never had a chance when she grabbed him by the ear and quite literally dragged him out because he tripped halfway to the door and she didn’t stop.”
That was one of the most ridiculous things I had ever seen in all of my travels. By the end I was laughing just by remembering it, and Barbs laughter is resonating throughout the house with mine. “Okay I would have loved to have seen that, but-“ Barb was cut off by both of our stomachs sending out a gurgle, telling the both of us that we were apparently hungry, and we both didn’t blush, at all.
So I ask a simple question that could be taken in many ways, “So, want to go get something to eat?”