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A pilot for an Idea I might or might not get back to.
Let me know if ya really want more.
In the frozen north there is little separating life from death, however there are things that are far worse than death.
A lone wonderer finds an Alicorn, alone, injured in the snow.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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First off, paragraph spacing problem, you do it for a few lines, and for many others... don’t. For example, you write like this:
While it should be:
See?
Next, Rainbow’s eyes are described as violet, no, they’re magenta or atleast pink (in case you don’t know, violet is more purple while magenta, although described as purplish-red, looks more pink).
Thirdly, this OC pony (atleast I think they are an OC, I’ll call them that for now) and Rainbow Dash seem way too close despite the fact they just met (the OC is aware of who Rainbow Dash is, but still).
Finally, this looks to be part of a huge AU, more explanation is needed, what relation does this OC have to the bigger picture? How is Dash an alicorn (she doesn’t seem to know too well herself)? What were they fighting? How did Dash end up — and what is the OC even doing — in the Frozen North of all places?
This gets an OKAY from me.
11881619
Thank you very much for the advice.
Even if I do not get around to implementing it in this work I will definitely take it into consideration in the future.
This is a story I wrote up from a prompt, I will give more details about my intentions later in my blog.
Again thank you for everything, I love commentary like this, it is very helpful.
...
Well then
Someone call littlepip!
11881619
Honestly from the mushroom cloud points i think it might be related to FOE
but its just my thoughts
11882328
Funny story about that.
This particular story was not intended as a Fallout Equestria story, originally it was meant to be a oneshot, but I now have ideas of where I would like to take it as far establishing it as its own series. It will remain unrelated to FOE.
However unrelated to this I have recently requested and received permission from the KKat to write in her world and with her characters provided that A) I treat the original story and characters with respect and give proper credit for them, B) understand my work will not be considered "canon" to Fallout: Equestria, and C)I do not attempt to make any profit off of my work or Kkatt's.
I have some of this project written already and will share more about it in my blog as the publishing date comes closer.
I have some Ideas about FOE I feel are rather unique yet build off of the lore in an interesting way, and I look forward to sharing with everypony.
11882385
Honestly GO FOR IT!
Short and, well, not sweet (cause it was sad) but intriging to say at least.
Just like Hyper Star said I really fell like this could be like a random chapter of a humongus AU. Still that doesn't make it bad, just a bit random.
It's certainly an interesting reflective atmospheric piece.
You should definitely take the paragraph spacing advice provided in the first comment on this story, though.
oooh my god this is amazing, i have so many questions about what's going on but whatever it is I love how you wrote this, just so atmospheric and raising questions without answers in a good way
11888970
That might just be the most enthusiastic response I have gotten yet 😆
Thank you and I am glad you enjoyed it so.
I'll be sure to put out a sequel/ prequel soon
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH Second verse, same as the first, by which i mean AMAZING!!!!!
It might be cause I just watched a video on depicting grief in art but I also reread the first chapter and before I talk about this chapter let me just say the prose in the first chapter is so evocative I just want to grab my oilpaints and paint every single scene from it that's how good it is.
And then this chapter. The mystery thickens, our unnamed narrator turns out to not be quite the regular far north survivor I assumed them to be initially. And then the yellow alicorn?!?! My first thought was fluttershy given that there's already a precedent of mane six becoming alicorns, which is definitely supported by that image at the end, but then there's her dialogue and her eyes being described as ancient, so it can't be current Fluttershy, and there's talk about the wanderer seeing the future so maybe they're seeing Fluttershy in the distant future but then why would she be so alone and an alicorn when Rainbow is the one we've established as an alicorn and aaaaah so many questions and i love it this fic is amazing the prose is amazing i love it so much!!!!
This one's definitely going on the favourites list... oh god damnit it is already
Also no beating yourself up, this fic is great and if you ever decide to do more with it ill read and love it and if you don't ill still be happy that I got to read this cause it's so good!