Tirek has, undoubtably, thoroughly, completely, won.
He has all six former bearers of the Elements tied to his (formerly Celestia's) throne.
He has the other three alicorns trapped in Tartarus.
He's absorbed every scrap of magic from every pony in Equestria.
And nopony will ever get a cutie mark, ever again.
Three certain fillies are going to do something about that. And if they can somehow rescue their sisters in the process, all the better...
For another take on the same idea, see Crusade at Midnight Castle by Carabas; or, for a story that takes the idea in a completely different direction, see Der Unter-gang by Monokeras.
Chapters (15)
Why bother mentioning it, then?
Putting parentheses in a story is very distracting. Try formatting the sentence along these lines: "Tirek, sitting on the throne in the castle that had once belonged to Princess Celestia," or similar.
Same as above. If you absolutely need to cram some additional information in, dashes are less intrusive.
Rainbow Dash is a BIT wittier than that. Especially considering what Tirek has done, I think her ire would be stronger, also.
Uh, sure ...
That word does not mean what you think it means. Also, spelt wrong the first time.
4861059
I have a sneaking suspicion that Twilight used a word that makes no sense in the context on purpose, to let Discord know she's playing along with him. Tirek doesn't know that Twilight is a genius and would not misuse a word like that, but Discord does.
4861083
I understand the context of the scene, but it makes Tirek look like an idiot for: a) not picking up on the subtext; and/or b) not doing his research into Twilight Sparkle, the alicorn princess who nearly bested him in combat.
Interesting story. Adding to Lord Tirek.
I was hesitant about this story at first; bad end stories usually aren't my cup of tea. But this one? This one I like. It promises silliness amidst the despair.
That said, outright saying that Discord lies when he explains the nature of the Crusaders rather ruins the joke. We know he's lying, but Tirek doesn't, and this seems to be largely from his perspective. Using knowledge from outside his awareness undercuts the immersion, which is never a good thing.
Aside from that, I'm definitely looking forward to more. Especially since Tirek appears to want to rule, and thus must singlehandedly deal not only with the Crusaders, but also with every bit of magical logistics in the entire nation. Celestial objects, weather management, agriculture... He has to do all of that, at least to a minimal extent. The repercussions for not doing so are too great to ignore, and delegation would require him to relinquish some of his power.
4861059
Because it's important. It's why Shining is now working for the villain.
Fixed the spelling, thanks. Yes, Twilight is threatening to throw Discord out the window with a rusty knife.
4861102
Or, (c), for not knowing what "defenestrate" means in the first place. He spent a thousand years locked in Tartarus, after all, where there aren't any dictionaries.
4861753
Yes, Tirek's really not being very bright here, is he?
My theory is that, while Tirek understands the villainous mind very well, the heroic mind is a closed book to him; he assumes that, underneath it all, everypony really wants personal power and he really believes that 'friendship' is a trap for the unwary.
You make a good point. Fixed.
4861130
Thank you kindly. I do appreciate having my stories added to appropriate groups.
I like the mind games here. This'll be worth following.
Quick question: I note the lack of a Dark tag, despite an evil-tyrant setting. Is that intentional? It could go either way depending on the tone you take, but from the description alone I was expecting to see one.
Ah yes... the Lord of Chaos is telling lies. Tirek certainly doesn't know who he's up against (times eleven if you count the Crusaders).
Add to that, they already have the last key in their possession and they know it. Now, if they can just get to the Tree of Harmony. As to Tirek being an idiot, well it's to be expected. "With supreme power comes supreme arrogance." (to paraphrase a certain arachnid.)
4863103
Yes.
Mind you, I'm not saying the story won't be dark; it's very hard for me to predict which direction a story will take before I've written it. So there's a good chance that I might change the tags later.
4863442 Also (speaking as an author) since people read the story as you are posting it chapter by chapter instead of all at once, tagging everything you intend to do can make for major spoilers.
Silly Tirek. He left Discord with one of his most powerful weapons: His mouth.
/double entendre.
I was wondering what happened to her.
Hmm.. Okay, Tirek is the Emperor. Discord was Vader. Scoots is Han Solo, Sweetie Belle would probably be Luke, and Applebloom is Chewbacca. Zecora is Obi Wan or possibly an Obi Wan/Yoda fusion.
They also still have the Alicorn Amulet and the Inspiration Manifestation(possibly in the form of dragon poo) hanging around, along with all the other amazingly dangerous items that Equestrians just seem to stick in weird places. I'm sure the Castle of the Sisters is bulging with world destroying weaponry.
4864383
Now I'm picturing a scene where Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle, in stolen Royal Guard armour, try to sneak in to rescue Princess
LeiaTwilight by pretending to take Applebloom prisoner.This is... Promising at least, keep the good work (even though a bit too short), this could perfectly turn into a great story when it's finished
Nicely done. Though apparently Tirek even drained the Crusaders? Wow. That's low.
Still, between their incredible determination and Zecora exploiting loopholes, la resistance has a fighting chance.
(Though wouldn't Manehattan also know of the Crusaders? Babs has been active... though that may just mean another rebel cell waiting to happen.)
Looking forward to more.
4867209
And Discord, who didn't know about Babs, has just told Tirek that the Cutie Mark Crusaders are "...based in Manehatten, I'm not sure exactly where."
Of course, Manehatten's a big city. Most Manehattenites probably haven't heard of the Cutie Mark Crusaders. What are the odds that the Royal Guard, in thoroughly searching Manehatten for any hint of the Crusaders, will just happen to run into Babs?
4868301
That being said, what's more likely? That a resistance is being led by three or four teenage fillies, or that there really is a secret elite unit of Celestia's leading the resistance and the kid being interrogated is lying or has been lied to?
Seriously? The one thing Hasbro overlooked(and it would've been stupid to do in the show) would be Tirek beating around the bush.
Well done. You did it for them
This story needs more crusaders. You should add Babs and her 2-4 crusaders she said she found in Manehatten at the Apple Family Reunion
Wow. He has Discord's powers and this is what he's doing with them. No imagination. No panache. No sense of showcentaurship. Pathetic.
And yeah, see how well that lackadaisical attitude towards climate shift works when they all starve to death, moron.
Mind you all of this scorn is directed towards Tirek himself, not you. I love your characterization of him. His mindset is so fundamentally alien to that of the ponies that he cannot even being to conceive of what is needed to rule them. To rule any beings, really. No wonder his homeland was a wasteland.
Hmm. Speaking of which, I wonder how Scorpan's doing...
In any case, looking forward to more.
4870461
Indeed. The very best lies are more believable than the truth, after all.
4870561
One has to wonder about that, really...
4870561
Tirek grossly misunderstands resource management and the true nature of power. And a lot of other things. He's a thug with delusions of adequacy.
hmm... I wonder if Poison Joke cancels out being discorded...
Villains rarely, if ever, regard themselves as such.
Yeah, no, you totally will.
Also ouch, poor Discord.
4873168
4873849
That's a very good question.
4875719
Ah, thanks. Fixed.
Yes, but Ahuizotl is the sort of cartoonish villain who would. I mean, his first appearance had a classic example of "lock the hero in the deathtrap and go away". And his entire motive in the second was to put a lot of effort into giving very hot summers to one valley - apparently for no reason beyond "because I'm evil".
I mean, he's not an idiot - he probably knows about as much about archaeology as Daring Do does - but he seems to really embrace the villainous role.
Of course, without magic Discord is still three times Twilight's size and has natural weapons. If Tirek gives Twilight a rusty knife... well, first she could make a big show of being unable to hold it, because as a unicorn she's used to doing everything with her magic. And then I could picture Discord using his greater size and dexterity to smply take the knife from her.
Alternately, if Tirek holds him down for Twilight, Discord can plead with her that he just did the same thing she did; yes, he told Tirek about the CMC, but he was doing it to save a friend, just like she was when she gave Tirek her magic. Then she has reason to not do it that maintains the cover story.
4875757 True. Some villains are jealous, some have a bloated sense of entitlement, some see the world through orange-blue morality instead of black-white, some are villains to protect that which they hold dear...
... and sometimes villains are just plain bad people.
4875961
Or she could explain the linguistic drift that has taken place over the past few millennia, and explain precisely how she planned on using a rusty knife to toss Discord out of a window.
4876026
Gonna be hard to throw him out a window if he's chained to Tirek's throne. Maybe that's what the rusty knife was for. :-)
"Why yes Tirek everything I shout in blind rage is fully premeditated. Now where did I put that rusty spoon?"
4876158
Well, she can still throw him out, it's just that Tirek can pull him back in again, quite easily...
Also, they're tied to the throne with rope, not chained to it.
4878059
This is Twilight. She might just have a checklist of "things to shout in a blind rage" somewhere.
Of course, this wouldn't help much at the moment, because most of her checklists were in the library when Tirek blew it up.
Well the good news is, Discord's free. The bad news is, he's still got no magic to defend himself from the guards.
The bad news is, Tirek knows he's been duped. The good news is, he still won't be looking for fillies.
Ignoring Discord, Tirek? Bad idea. I smell a Discord CMC team up afoot!
Magnificently done on all counts, from the hidden communication to the successful defenestration, and most especially Tirek's misguided consternation. Eagerly looking forward to more. Tirek's days are definitely numbered.
Oh, Tirek, you dumb fuck.
AHAHAHAHA, Defenestration! Favorite family word
I still think Babs Seed and Manehatten branch of CMC would be awesome
4894601
The good news is, the guards have been told to ignore him. The bad news is, the rest of the population still sees him as Tirek's ally.
4894608
4894617
Thanks!
I hope this new chapter doesn't disappoint - I feel there are several weaknesses in it.
4895210
Babs now has a scene!
...it's probably her last scene in this story, but it is a scene.
Wow, Tirek is an idiot.
4899593
It´s a miracle he outsmarted Discord.
4899607 It's not even that he outsmarted him, it's just that he took him by surprise.
But hey, even a stopped clock is right twice a day.
Ah yes, the only logical choice for Babs's parents. I love the explanation for her accent. Also, Manehattan seems awfully peaceful, given the climatic instability and national disarray...
And Tirek continues to be hilarious in gripping the Villain Ball. Apparently, he needs a millennium or so to craft a decent plan.
Unless, of course, he's toying with the ponies, lulling them into a false sense of security regarding his intellect...
In any case, looking forward to more.
Faved on concept alone. Hope the read doesn't disappoint when I find the time. From the comments I don't think it will.
YAY! KEEP IT UP!
Now you just need to come up with two new crusaders and everything will be perfect
4899542
The good news is, they have no magic either. The bad news is, they won't help him across the street. :-)
I think you missed an opportunity with this chapter. Rarity should be throwing a huge histrionic fit, full of "You ruffian! You barbarian! You brute!" and "Be strong, Spikey-Wikey!" and so on. Between her and Pinkie, they could raise so much noise that Tirek can barely hear that Spike is saying "ow" in the most unconvincing manner ever.
Twilight channeling Trickster is awesome. I suspect she wouldn't have originally thought of it until Discord demonstrated it, but she's quite smart enough to run with it on her own now.
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4894608
Tirek: "I won. I don't need to think any more."
4899628
Well, Manehatten may be in the tyrant's grip, and the inhabitants may have all lost their magic... but they're still ponies. Still herd animals, their instincts in times of trouble telling them to band together, keep their heads down, and not stand out too much. I think they'd still be peaceful, right up until the food shortages hit... which the wouldn't, not in the first three weeks. (A couple of months down the line, there could be trouble).
4899672
I have no current plans to include any original crusaders in this story. Babs probably won't even make another appearance, unfortunately...
4902565
You are right. You are so very, very right that, after reading your comment, I went back and edited that scene, and I think it's a lot better now than it was.
Thank you very much for pointing out that missed opportunity. Now that I know about it, I don't know how I could possibly have missed it in the first place.
4899648
I, too, hope that it does not disappoint.
Oh gosh, I hope Discord teams up with the CMC in the end, but him leaving them gives me a bad feeling... please don't kill him!
And so the resistance builds. Still, shouldn't five of the keys already be in the box? That's where they left them in the baseline, so they should probably still be there. On the other hand, even with Zecora, the Crusaders are going to need at least two others to help turn the things. Discord might work, and if they can restore Daring Do, that's the full compliment... but that assumes that Discord will be able to operate an artifact of capital-H Harmony. Hmm.
In any case, looking forward to more.