Bald Ostri, the stallion from the past! Once the consort of Princess Luna, the Slayer of Griffins, had just blown up the mothership of the Storm King's invasion Fleet and left Canterlot. With Chrysalis and Blaze in tow, he's leaving Equestria to explore the world!
I hopped off my wagon the day after the Friendship Festival. Luna had just killed my entire mood, but… Hey, there’s a world to explore, a whole new world. Honestly, I am pissed, but I wasn’t worried about myself. Apparently Equestria’s about to go to war, so I didn’t want to stick around long enough for that. Chrysalis hopped off the wagon soon after me, as did Blaze. The three of us just woke up, and had stopped at a waterfall that was at the base of Mount Canterlot, which was, unsurprisingly, the name given to the mountain Canterlot was sitting on.
I watched as Blaze stretched like a cat, before she ‘accidentally’ got into my space while I was also stretching. “Good morning, Ostri. Are you at least feeling marginally better now that we are away from any Equestrian politician?” She asked.
“Eh, I still feel like shit. Though I suppose I do have something to look forward to.” I sat on my ass and started petting Blaze. “Did you sleep well, at least?”
“Of course I did, I got to cuddle up with my favorite stallion, and my favorite changeling. I would’ve slept better if we were all in a good mood, but it appears only I am in a good mood.”
Chrysalis shook herself, before taking a brush out of one of the storage compartments in the wagon. “I’m in a good mood. I’ve got a stallion, who’s a hunk, and I get to travel the world with him after being cleared of all my crimes.” She sat down next to me while she meticulously brushed her mane out. She hummed in content, with her eyes closed as she leaned over and kissed me. “And I am going to do my best to bring my new coltfriend out of his funk. I’m certain some morning tickling would do?” She tilted her head.
“I swear to god, if you tickle me, I probably won’t swing at you, but I will pout at you after you’re done.” I leaned into her and she promptly responded with a kiss to the top of my head, right in between the ears. “Didya sleep well?”
“I did. I used you as a pillow.”
“But… Blaze is a much more comfy pillow! I used her as a bed last night!”
“While I am luxuriously fluffy and soft as a bed, I do not appreciate having both of you laying on top of me. I am all for cuddling, but do refrain; I will only severely enjoy the cuddling.”
The three of us then started sorting through what we were actually bringing on our trip. Most of it was food for me, which consisted of a bunch of cans of chili, some dried vegetables that can be boiled up, a canteen along with a large, large water container. The container was filled at the lake, and the canteen was promptly filled up by Blaze using her magic to carry the much heavier containers. My collection of knives were in a box, save for the decorational, ceremonial knife that was actually stupidly sharp. It was made out of obsidian, but had some enchants done to it to make it less brittle. I tucked that, which was in a sheaf, under my wing, where I strapped it to my body.
Chrysalis had packed up a couple of things, despite her being able to transform clothes onto her sexy body, she did pack in a dress, a maid dress, and a nurse outfit for some reason. She put that in a small suitcase, which was way smaller than the trunk I had for my food and knives. I knew I was going to want to grab a crossbow, modify it into a little rocket launcher, since I had a lot of fireworks in a separate trunk.
Blaze didn’t have much, other than a ball, a food bowl even though she didn’t need food in the same sense that I do, and that was it.
I hopped back into our wagon to put the trunks and suitcase back in and looked around. The inside of the wagon, despite how cheap it apparently was, was pretty spacious. There was enough room for a bed, big enough to hold Blaze and Chrysalis, and since Blaze was my bed, it was plenty of space. The bed was actually kinda shitty, but it was soft enough, and Chrysalis said she could stick a cloud into it to make it softer in the future. The wagon had a roof, one made of cotton, thick, thick cotton that was held up with five supporting beams, which held a tarp on top for rain.
The cotton was for insulation, as much as it can provide in an open ended wagon, and the tarp was for weather.
With that said, the thin, wooden support beams for the cotton roof were strong enough to have several shelves, where Chryssy and I kept our toothbrushes and a cup to use for brushing our teeth with. Along with a pack of toothpaste. That was on the left hand wall of the wagon. On the right hand side was a map of the world, which was very similar to planet Earth. Different names for the continents, and very different countries, but they were there. On a shelf next to it was a journal, listing the marked locations we put on the map and the reasons for why we wanted to go to them.
There was Griffonia, apparently griffins loved war heroes. That was located where Canada usually is.
There was what was essentially the Korean Peninsula and Japan, or the only main island of Japan. Honshu, was what Japan was called in this world. We were going to keep heading north from Griffonia and into the Crystal Empire, located somewhere in what should be Alaska. Since the sea levels were a lot lower, there was the Bering Land Bridge along with a few other things. Luckily, I won’t have to find out what kind of weirdos live in this world’s version of Florida, since that got hit with an asteroid apparently, long, long ago, and was promptly crumpled to dust while Celestia and Luna were fighting each other.
While Blaze was reluctant, she did agree to try and guide us through her homeland, Honshu.
I grabbed that before hopping back out, and after I grabbed a can of chili. Each can had six servings in it and I had about fifty five cans on me. I had more cans of various fruits and vegetables, even canned pasta, so I had enough food to last me until we reached the Gryphus, the capital of Griffonia.
Chrysalis took her toothbrush, took the tube of toothpaste, before promptly spreading the stuff on both our brushes. She continued to brush her mane as we brush our teeth. We rinsed, and the cup was put back into place. Chryssy pulled out a mirror from somewhere, dunno where, and looked herself over. “Do I look good, Ostri?” She asked.
“That you do. You look lovely… I wonder if those legs are good for being pillows.”
“Mmm, I could get my socks out, and they would be. Otherwise, they are rather mediocre for cuddling; my carapace is hard and protective. However, my legs are good for holding my lovers in place while I keep them safe and warm from the harsh world outside.” She rubbed one of those sexy legs up my neck, coming to a stop under my chin. We shared a kiss while Blaze rolled her eyes.
“If you two are going to mate, just do it already.”
“We’re getting started with dating, you mutt. We are taking things slow; I definitely am as I do not wish to harm Ostri more than he already has been.”
“What did you call me?” Blaze asked. “A mutt?” She tilted her head and whimpered. “I thought you loved me, Chrysalis.”
“Quit acting, you stupid pup. You and I both know you don’t care.”
“Fine!” Blaze walked up and nipped Chrysalis’s ear. “That is for calling me a mutt, though. Seriously, you two need a den; you smell like you’re both about to mate.”
“We’re just kissin’, Blaze. You know what that is.”
“I know, you kiss me on the forehead everyday before you disappear, and you still do it before you go to bed when you return. I can tell you and Chrysalis are somewhat compatible, personality wise, so I am looking forward to when you two are mating.” Blaze grabbed our little travel book, and handed it to me. “I believe Chrysalis wanted to visit her old Hive before we begin heading north? It would be a bit of a detour, but we need to head west to get to Griffonia anyways.”
“We should. You wanted to check in on the Hive, Chryssy?”
“I do. They are only my children, after all. I wish to also see how King Thorax is handling the Hive, perhaps lend him a hoof of advice? He may just chase us off. I would just like some closure to my children, if they hate me, if they love me, or if they forgive me for being a horrible ruler.”
“Alrighty then. Let’s get moving-” Blaze paused. “Wassup, girl?”
“We are not alone. Four alicorns, five mares. They’re coming down the mountain from the same path we climbed down the mountain from.” I slumped over. “I know.”
Chrysalis sighed as she put her dress away, and promptly took a hat out of my trunk, a sunhat that I didn’t notice being in there until she pulled it out. “Why can’t those annoying ponies leave us be? We were well on our way to going to my old kingdom after we enjoyed ourselves before hoof.”
“I don’t fucking know,” I shrugged. “This lake looked like it’d be the perfect spot to stop after such a shitty week; I wouldn’t mind swimming around in it. Fuck me, I haven’t even got a fire going to heat up this,” I lifted the can of chili. Chrysalis’s horn lit up and a fireplace was quickly put into place after her magic took hold of various rocks, pieces of wood, and even got the canteen out to put the fire out. She then promptly lit it, before the can cracked open, and she perfectly took one portion out and into a metal bowl.
“God damn that was cool,” I tapped my forehead, where my horn should’ve been if I were a unicorn. “That just makes me wish I became a unicorn when I came to Equestria. Flying fast is cool, but I can’t do it for very long, or control how good I am at flying.” I shrugged and motioned Chrysalis to lay down by the fire. “C’mon, we’re dating, right? Cuddling is a must. And it would also make Luna sad or whatever.” Chrysalis had already slipped on some socks and laid down in front of the fire.
“You really are not making any effort to not hide anything, ain’tya?” I asked. Chrysalis was sprawled out in front of the fire, making sure to show off her legs, flanks, and everything shy of her rear end. That combined with the socks that went all the way up her legs, with her rear-leg-socks stopping just at her flanks, I won’t lie, it was a very enticing sight.
“It is making you want to come over here and cuddle with me while your food cooks, doesn’t it? I require breakfast as well, Ostri, and I feed on emotions. Lust is an emotion… and you aren’t feeling it.” She said as I laid down on the side of her stomach, and rested my head on her shoulder. “But you are feeling love. I suppose I can work with that…” she hummed as her horn lit. I could feel her taking a little nibble.
“You can go wild, Chrysalis. You know it won’t affect me that badly.”
“And risk hurting you? I think not. I only need to ‘go wild’ if I know there is a big fight going on. Between you and Blaze constantly feeding me with ambient emotion, I am only ‘eating’ breakfast with you right now as a common courtesy, without getting into any of your supplies. You need food more than I do, physical food, and we need to make your food last a while. That cannot happen if we share every physical meal together, Ostri.”
“Alright… though at dinner, if we reach another town, we are going to have dinner together. It will be a nice evening. I’ll put on… something, and you can put on that nice dress that you’ve got. It’ll be a nice evening, and Blaze can watch the wagon, or do whatever she does when we leave her alone.”
“I chew on your shoes when you’re out and about…”
“But horseshoes are made of metal, are they not?” Chrysalis asked.
“They are, she’s read my mind, and knows what’s going on in there at all times. She’s talking about human shoes to try and take the piss out of me. Those are made out of rubber and plastic, and other things.” I lightly bopped blaze on the nose, since she was now in my face with a shit eating grin. “I adore ya, bud, but c’mon now!” I laughed and the three of us just started watching the fire go.
“Your food is going to burn if you leave it on the fire too long,” Chrysalis said, removing the bowl off of it for me. “And wait a moment for it to cool; I don’t want you hurting yourself.”
“Fine, Mom…” We continued watching it as we enjoyed the ambient, morning air. It was spring, so it was a very, very nice morning. It was a little chilly, which made the warmth from the sun a nice contrast to everything else. Occasionally I would sniff my food and hold it near my cheeks to test how hot it is. I was getting back into a good mood by the time the chilly was cool enough to eat it.
“Wanna try some, Chrysalis?” I lifted a spoonful up to her.
“It smells good, but I know I’ve had some before your banishment. That stuff cannot compare to your cooking.” She shrugged. Before taking the spoonful. “I was right; your cooking is much better.”
“Glad you still remember my cooking, even after a thousand years. Now if only Luna could be bothered to remember my name a thousand years later.”
“That bitch,” Chrysalis shook her head. “You promised to teach me how to cook, by the way. You never did.”
“I can teach you on a date, when we get a hotel room with a proper kitchen in it.”
“That would be nice,” Chrysalis hummed.
“And who were you calling a ‘bitch’?” We all immediately groaned.
“God dammit, this morning was going to be so damn good too!” I sighed. I looked up to see the Goody-goody gang and the four princesses. “What the hell do y’all want!?” I asked. “I thought you all hated the ‘monster’ that I’ve become, or whatever.” I noted, and silently cheered when Luna’s eyes landed on me and Chrysalis; she didn’t look happy. Chrysalis noticed too, since she immediately brought her forelegs up, and pulled me closer to her, while casting a glare at the group that had just so thoroughly ruined our morning. Cadance was watching us with… Curiosity.
“Morning Cadance. Are you feeling better after yesterday’s… interesting events?” I asked.
“I’ve been better, but yes. I am feeling better, thank you for asking,” Cadance started approaching us. Only because she was the one princess here that I wouldn’t mind speaking to, none of us stopped her. I know Chrysalis just didn’t wanna fight, and Blaze knew what I was thinking. She laid down in front of us. “How are you doing? I know that… after some of the things my aunts have done, you aren’t exactly… excited to see us.” I only now noticed that Shining was standing behind the group, giving my group a judgy-glare.
“Not gonna lie, I was feeling a lot better 'til they all showed up. If it were just you and Shining Armor, I'd be in such a good mood, I swear to god.”
Cadance flicked between me and Chrysalis and giggled. “I can see why; I didn’t think I’d see the day that Chrysalis would actually protect another living creature from harm, while wearing socks. No offense, Chrysalis, but…”
“I know. I foalnapped you and ruined your wedding, and have done numerous things to you that probably weren't legal by Equestria’s standards,” Chrysalis hummed. “I am surprised that you are more pleasant to speak to than your aunts.”
“Well…” Cadance shrugged. She then pointedly looked me in the eyes. “There are a few things we wish to discuss, but I suppose we shall talk about that after Auntie Celestia and Auntie Luna have their word with you.” I nodded and extended a hoof. Cadance tilted her head, before we bumped hooves. Luna and Celestia were just sitting there in shock. “If you ever stop by the Crystal Empire, let me know; I wouldn’t mind having tea with you without me almost getting assassinated, alright?”
“You bet, Cadance.” I am actually starting to like Cadance. “Need a guard or somethin, just hit me up. I’m no mage, so I can’t protect you with a shield, but I am pretty proficient with knives.”
“Of course!” She nuzzled me very quickly before backing off. “And if you need a place to stay the night, my door is always open!”
“When… Did you and Cadance become friends?” Celestia asked.
“She met me, we shared some water at an overpriced, shitty cafe, and I told her what Luna did to me. Instead of hounding me any further, she tried being nice to me. I think, before she almost got shot, she was about to go on, and on, and on about how she was going to rip you and your sister a new asshole for what you’ve done to me.” I nodded to the pink princess that had slotted back into place. “I tend to fight back when threatened, and I treat any kindness shown my way tenfold. Now, what do you want?”
“Well… Equestria just had war declared on it by the Storm King.”
“That’s cool. Have fun with that.”
“You… don’t care? I thought you did when you saved everypony at the Friendship Festival.”
“I blew up a ship. That’s it. I did it because you and your sister were doing fuck-all, and it looked like you were all gonna lose if I didn’t step in. Add in the fact that it looked like my pet kitsune and my marefriend were going to be in harm’s way, and you’ve got my reasoning for helping out at all. Plus, I am kinda chill with Apple Jack, and she was definitely gonna get hurt during that whole thing, so that’s a bonus.”
“But you’re a general of Equestria-”
“I was a captain of the Lunar Legion, a dead branch in your army, Princess. That was… I believe it was phased out by the Lunar Guard if I am not mistaken. Plus, I’m defecting. I would legitimately rather try to make love to a kumiho, that will eat my kidney and then me, than fight a war for two assholes that just spent the last week using me as an emotional punching bag. So fuck off, will ya?”
“That’s no way to talk to Princess Celestia, Ostri,” Twilight said. “And you technically initiated the war by blowing up that warship!”
“You’ve got a super weapon, ten times the forces, apparently the God of Chaos, and griffins as allies. On top of that, hundreds of very, very capable unicorns. Just stomp out the Storm King's race, call it a day, and go back to living however the fuck you wanna live. It ain’t my problem, Twilight.” Pinkie raised her hoof. “What do you want?”
“When you and Chrysalis get married, can I plan out your wedding reception?” I blinked. What the fuck?
“Y’know what? Sure. If you find out me and Chryssy are getting married, and can find us, we’ll let you plan out the whole reception.” Pinkie did a cute little hoof pump. I won’t lie, it was very cute.
Celestia inclined her head, realizing that she definitely wasn’t going to be getting anywhere with me, and she backed off. Luna was next in line. She walked up to us, with a look that could kill a lesser being. Unfortunately, I was once human, and I do not cower to prey animals. So I just got up from the very, very comfortable spot that was Queen Chrysalis’s shoulder and stepped forward. We stopped nose and nose, glaring at each other, before Luna took a step back. I raised an eyebrow and got ready to dodge in case she decides that hitting me is a good idea.
“What?” I asked.
“You moved on rather quickly, I see,” Luna noted. Huh, I didn’t notice that Chrysalis pulled me off my hooves and back into her embrace.
“That’s a shame. Do you have anything of importance you want to say to me?”
“I wanted to say that I was…” Her horn lit up and it lifted a very familiar, matching set of boxes. She opened them up and revealed… our wedding necklaces. You know, when I first found those again, in pristine condition, I broke. I completely broke down. Now as I stared at them, all I saw were empty promises, empty whispers of how much I was loved and cared for by the mare I was going to marry. I stared at them for a moment, before shrugging. “How much did you spend on these?” Luna asked.
“Don’t matter anymore; they were worth every little bit I spent on them when I first commissioned them. Now I think they were a complete waste of blood, sweat, tears and money.” I nuzzled Chrysalis, who happily kissed me back. “Why do you ask?”
“These had to cost you a fortune, Ostri. What were these for?”
“Eh… Why do you care, anyways? You would've said no if I proposed a thousand years ago." Luna was tearing up as she turned the open boxes towards her, and she started tearing up.
“What I’ve done to you, since you’ve returned… I truly ruined you, didn’t I? There is no turning back, is there?”
“Debatable. Had you left me alone after we broke up, I would’ve been happy with being your friend; we could’ve rekindled some love between us. Nah, you just had to sick your sister on me and then only keep coming back to make sure you don’t lose your little ‘fountain of knowledge’ or whatever. However,” I hummed. “Nah, I ain’t gonna risk getting burnt again. You wanna piss off in Canterlot with Celestia, Twilight and her friends? You said I am undeserving of love, so quit crying about how you ruined me. Because I deserve what happened to me, apparently.”
Celestia stepped between us and ushered Luna away from me, as poor, poor Moon Butt was crying! Ah damn that sucks. The two started walking back up to Canterlot, where they should’ve stayed to help with the cleaning efforts. Most of Twilight’s friends, save Pinkie, Rainbow and Apple Jack, okay, so just half of the ‘gay squad’ were glaring at me now. They turned to head off to wherever the heck. That just left Cadance and Shining Armor.
“So, you two needed something?” I asked.
“Yeah…” Shining hissed. “I would be mad, but after what Luna told you after you literally saved Canterlot? Sure, it was bloody, but you did save the day.” He shrugged. “Well, I’ll let Cadance do the talking, since you two seem to get along nicely.”
The princess of love nodded. “I’m glad you didn’t go running back to Auntie Luna; so many ponies make that mistake of returning to an abusive lover, and it never ends well,” she walked over and hugged me with her wings. Wow, Cadance is a lot softer than Luna ever was. She pulled back pretty quickly, and took a deep breath. “So I believe trains heading into Griffonia, from Equestria, are going to be stopped because of the impending war. Luckily, there aren’t border checks everywhere, along the borders, so assuming we avoid those, you can smuggle us back into our kingdom.”
“And that is?” I asked. “I thought you were an Equestrian leader.”
“Actually, I am the Princess of the Crystal Empire. I can lead Equestria in a dire situation, but right now, I want to check in on my kingdom and my daughter. We’ll be patient; you probably have a lot of places you’d like to visit, and to be honest, myself and Shiny won’t mind some tourism and it’s your wagon. I can cook, and Shiny can help keep the wagon safe if need be.” I hummed and grabbed my travel book.
“Mmm… I dunno, the Crystal Empire is somewhere I wanna see. That’s our third stop, actually. Question, why not take a chariot… nevermind, that’s a fucktarded idea.” I shrugged. “Well, we got the room, it’ll be a bit cramped-” Blaze’s eyes lit up and the wagon grew slightly in size. “Nevermind, what the fuck, Blaze?”
“I am a kitsune, I am magic, bitch!” Blaze through her forelegs in the air before promptly falling on her back with an 'oof'. It was adorable.
Shining Armor whistled as he slowly started staring at my fox, who was struggling to get on her stomach. “Sweet Celestia… You’ve got to let me know where you found her, Ostri.”
“In a forest, a thousand years ago. I was gonna cut her head off, but then she acted cute and pretended to be dead so I could still get the bounty for killing her. Blaze is awesome, by the way. I doubt many kitsune would happily let me do this.” I grabbed Blaze just as she stood back up, threw her on her back, which made Cadance and Shining Armor jump, only for Blaze to start laughing as I hopped on her and started rubbing her belly. “Kitsune are usually proud animals, and don’t like being babied all that often. Again though, Blaze is awesome and is the best dog I could’ve asked for.”
“Well then…” Shining Armor shrugged. “Are rations going to be a problem, by the way? Me and Cadance have our own-”
“Nah. Just help pay for food whenever we hit a pitstop and-” they looked confused at that. “A pitstop is a place you stop to refill stuff, get food, other supplies, all that fun stuff. Help with that, and it’s cool as long as you two don’t overeat, Cadance. I know you alicorns need a lot of food.”
“I’ve been needing a diet anyway; I’m getting a little fat.”
“You look fine as is,” Chrysalis pointed out. “I’d form a herd with you if you weren’t my mortal enemy not too long ago.” We all sat there, staring at Chrysalis. “What? Cadance is a beautiful mare, even if she is a little too pink and too innocent for her own good. Besides, I’ve got a stallion now; it won’t stop us from forming a herd if we desire it, but…”
“We’ll see how we’re feeling at the end of the journey,” Shining shrugged.
Soon, me and Shining were sitting together, sharing a bottle of vodka that he had bought while in Canterlot, while Cadance and Chrysalis were whispering to each other like fillies. “Whaddya think they’re whispering about?” I asked.
“Probably ways to embarrass us in public,” Shining shrugged. “I don’t mind; Cadance is lovely to be around. When do you wanna get moving?” He asked.
“Well, it’s almost noon, but I’m not really in a rush to get anywhere. This spot here? This waterfall? A perfect spot to spend a day or two at. You don’t wanna see Cadance while her fur’s clinging to her body? Me and Luna…” I hummed. “Well, you know, I bet you’d find a soaking wet, because she was swimming, Cadance to be sexy, wouldn’t ya?”
“I would…” Shining nodded. “You make a good argument.” We cheered, and downed our last shots. We may be mini horses, but we’re still horses, so we were barely even buzzed. “C’mon, let’s go convince our marefriends to go swimming with us. This is basically our vacation until we get home.” We both agreed that that would be a good idea. It was. Chrysalis, when wet, is sexy…
That can be taken so poorly out of context. Chrysalis was covered in water, not horny. I think. She probably was horny anyways. We ended off the night, having some good food, after we went into Canterlot to get an actual dinner before we hit the road in the morning. I was having a great time.
The next morning, none of us wasted any time getting a move on. We brush our teeth, Cadance and Chrysalis brushed their manes and tails, and the three ponies present had a quick serving of canned flavored shit(aka canned apples), and we were about ready to get a move on. When we all hopped back into the wagon, Shining armor looked around before his eyes inevitably fell upon me. He noted how despite this being a horse pulled wagon, there was no ‘horse’ pulling the wagon forward.
“So, Ostri, how are we going to get moving if we’re all in here?” He asked. “I thought you were pulling the wagon.”
“No, I wasn’t. Blaze was.”
“But… she is in the wagon too, you’re using her as a pillow while reading a Daring Do book.” I looked it over before humming.
“Hey Blaze, wanna pull the wagon?”
“It is my job, Ostri, so yes I do.” Her eyes lit up and our wagon started moving down the road. “Will this suffice until we reach our first destination? And no, it will not be Ponyville; this road stops there first for some reason. We’re heading west towards Baltimare as soon as we are done here. That’s our first stop,” she said. Both of our new traveling buddies were just staring at Blaze in pure shock. Not too long after the wagon started moving, I was just laying there, idly stroking my fox’s jaw.
“Ostri,” I looked up at Cadance the moment she spoke up.
“Whaddup?” I asked.
“Are you sure this is fine with Blaze? Most unicorns that end up doing this, stuff like this, tire out quickly.”
“You see… Kitsunes are a lot stronger than the average unicorn. I’d say if Blaze were pissed off enough, she could probably beat the shit out of Twilight. I think. Never really got a gauge on how strong Blaze’s magic is, but in a battle of raw attrition, you aren’t beating her. From what I’ve been told by Blaze, as kitsunes get older, they become more magic-based and not… well, flesh and blood-based. Blaze is a thousand years old, and is an entirely magical entity at this point; she doesn’t get tired.
“Granted, she loves sleeping, and eating occasionally, and clearly enjoys physical contact,” I nodded to how Blaze was now laying her head on my neck. “Bud,” I chuckled and nuzzled her. “She’s gotten a lot cuddlier after I returned from getting sent through time and space against my will.”
Cadance tilted her head, like she was gauging the two of us. “You do know what I’m the princess of, correct?”
“Love?” I asked.
“You are correct. I help ponies find love, I can tell a pony if there is no love in their relationship off the bat, and if there will be no love in that relationship. Sometimes my emotions do cloud my judgment, like when Luna lied to me about how you two broke up,” both she and Shining Armor snorted. “And I can even sense just platonic love. If it’s love, I can sense it; I am an empath, basically. I believe my abilities will never be anywhere near as robust as… Chrysalis, for example, since she literally eats emotions, but I can sense others’ emotions, with love of any form being the one I can pick up the most.”
“Huh. So…”
“It’s also why I’m leaving Canterlot. After seeing the lengths Luna has gone to, just to keep you in a loveless relationship for ‘war knowledge’ or whatever. Then she and Auntie Celestia have the audacity to come back, after already breaking you down in so many ways that you’re almost emotionally dead, to ask if you’d like to fight a war for them. After saying things to you that clearly stung in a different way for you than it would’ve for others… ‘undeserving of love’?” She asked. “What does that mean to you, if you don’t mind me asking?”
“I’m an orphan. Never really had anyone to love me up until I started dating Luna a thousand years ago.” I chuckled humorlessly. “God damn, we were awful. We did every little thing together besides any oddjobs I had, I fought a battle for her, kissed at every opportunity. It was lovely. Fuck, hearing the voice that used to whisper to me about how much she loved me, to that? Ah, any love that I did have for that woman died. All I’ve wanted is somebody to call family, and now I’ve got Chrysalis and Blaze to call family.
“I didn’t want to get dumped into the future of a world where I’ve found a family in, I didn’t wanna fight a battle. I didn’t want to fight a war. I didn’t wanna get emotionally beaten and slapped around to the point of me no longer caring about others around me, aside from these two,” I felt Chrysalis creep up behind me just to wrap her forelegs around my neck. I laughed as she pulled me off of Blaze and started showering me with kisses, nuzzles, nips, the whole shabang.
Once we calmed down, Blaze took the time to climb up on both of us, draping her torso across mine and Chrysalis’s sides, while her tails wrapped around us like a protective little barrier. I sighed and rested my head on the changeling’s neck while we stared at the royal couple.
Shining started chuckling. “Boy, I never thought I’d see the day where Chrysalis is more affectionate, genuinely affectionate, for another creature in my life. And then she’s more loving than Auntie Luna and Auntie Celestia?”
“I know. What a bizarre time to be alive, is it not?” Chrysalis shrugged. “I just care about not being alone anymore. Believe it or not, but changelings are highly social creatures, relying on a weird mixture of a pack and herd structure. We either need another changeling, or we need another creature to bond with. So imagine how I felt when Ostri showed me genuine affection when we first reunited. And then I get this little hunk of stallion all to myself… romantically, at least. Blaze wouldn’t let me fully keep custody over this little morsel.”
We watched the wagon as it slowly pulled out of Ponyville. Luckily, since Twilight and her friends were stuck in Canterlot for the time being, we weren’t bothered. We did get a few looks, since the wagon just looked like it was moving on our own, but it took us no time to just fully get away from Ponyville; it was basically a one stop-shop town. You stop, you get gas or call a local a dumbshit, and leave. Chrysalis stuck a hoof out the wagon, which quickly took the form of a human hand, as she flipped off… Starlight Glimmer.
“Yeah!” I laughed. “Vete a La mierda, perra!” It took two years of Spanish class for me to learn how to say that properly.
“What the buck did you just say?” Shining Armor asked.
“Called Starlight a bitch. Is that not accurate?”
“Well, she was one until she reformed…” Cadance admitted.
“See? A bitch,” I chuckled. “Ah, I shouldn’t be too mean. She actually felt bad about not being able to send me back to my time, before I got yoinked from it… Do you guys not speak a lick of spanish?”
“No… what even is Spanish?” Cadance asked.
“Ostri, stop speaking strange languages from your old homeworld. It is strange.”
“No. Me gusta hablar de maneras que confundan a los ponis.” I got hit with a newspaper. Two, actually. Cadance and Chrysalis blinked, realizing that both of them had newspapers. They smirked, before they started to promptly assault me at the same time, with their newspapers while I did my best to shield myself.
“Blaze, save me!”
“Got it,” Blaze threw me into the middle of the wagon, where the newspapers followed… only for Blaze to jump, land on top of me, and keep me pinned under her big, fluffy butt. It wasn’t heavy, Blaze is a magical entity, but like… “I saved you from being assaulted by newspapers, did I not?” She glared at Shining Armor who was snickering. Within moments, both he and I were pinned under the kitsune.
“Mec, c’est vraiment nul.” I grumbled.
“Ostri, stop speaking in ‘French'. These ponies only know of the language that you’re referring to as ‘English’ in your head. In fact, most creatures on Equus will only know English.”
We remained somewhat quiet for the rest of the trip. Shining Armor, despite us not getting started on the right hoof, was actually pretty chill. Apparently our favorite royal couple started seeing just how manipulative their mother country’s diarch is, and were just dying to get away. Granted, there still was a war going on, apparently, but like, none of us particularly care. Well, Shiny did; he is a guard at heart and wants to keep ponies safe, which is completely fair to him. He just agreed with the argument that Equestria, for all intents and purposes, can easily mop the floor with the Yetis.
Halfway through the day, we ended up stopping around a small lake. I hummed… Fish sounds good. I hopped off the wagon and made my way down to the pond and took a nice, long look in it. The fish in this bitch are huge! Oh… I have no idea how to cook a fish, but Blaze might. Chrysalis and Blaze were watching me while Cadance and Shining were getting the camp set up. Only when Cadance looked up, did she urged Shiny to join us by the lake.
“Do you plan on swimming again, Ostri?” Shining asked.
“Mmm. I’m tempted. But also, fish. It has been so long since I’ve had any form of meat, and fishsticks sound good right now.” I hummed. “Or just a slice of salmon.”
“...What were you before you became a pony?” Cadance asked. “You should not be having urges for meat. Ponies can eat meat, but only do so if they have protein deficiencies; I’ve never seen one crave meat before.”
“I was a hairless, omnivorous ape. I didn’t like fish all that much, but I can’t get KFC, and I can’t eat a steak since that would require eating a sapient creature. Fish is the next best thing!” I pulled my knife out and started watching the water. Shining became more interested in my knife skills after that, as he watched the water with me. In a heartbeat, my hoof shot forward, and my knife caught a knifely-I’ll kill myself now- sized fish. I looked it over, while Blaze started sniffing it.
“I can teach you how to get the parts you want to eat off of this one,” Blaze shrugged. “Cooking it would be another story, but Chrysalis and I can probably tell when it would be safe to eat just with our magic…” Blaze took the fish from me before walking into a nearby bush. Not too long after she walked out with a sliced up, perfectly butchered fish. “I figured I would just save you the hassle, Ostri. No point in making our pony travellers more uncomfortable.”
“We don’t even mind,” Cadance waved a hoof. “I’ve seen griffins eat, everypony needs to eat, and have preferences for what they want to eat. I do know how to cook a fish should I ever get a griffin ambassador on short notice. I even like fish in small amounts. I can get that cooked up real quick, and we can have a nice lunch.”
“Offering my mate a lovely lunch, Cadance? Your husband is right there, you know,” Chrysalis said with a shit eating grin.
“Oh shut up, Chrysalis, you’re right there and I would like to think that I know better than to take your mate from you.”
“That you do. It is why I haven’t jumped you. If I knew how to cook, however, I would be more than willing to offer my stallion a nicely cooked dinner.”
“I can show you how to cook a fish,” Cadance offered. “At least then you can do it in the future with the fish. It’ll just smell really bad.”
“I can live with that.” The two trotted on over to the fire while me and Shining looked at our respective marefriend and wife as their hips swayed. They actually swayed a lot more than usual. Chrysalis looked over her shoulder and grinned; she knew exactly what she was doing, and Cadance definitely knew what she was doing to Shiny. The two of us sat there while Blaze rolled her eyes and jumped in the lake to wash the blood off.
“Those are the nicest set of hips on anypony ever,” Shining Armor whispered.
“I didn’t think I’d be watching a horse’s ass sway in my life, or be turned on by it, let alone a bughorse, yet here I am.”
“We’re the luckiest stallions in Tartarus, Ostri. You know that, right?”
“That we are. It’s a good feeling, ain’t it?”
“That it is, my guy, that it is.”
“Hey Shiny, where’d Cadance get socks from?” Our respective girls were wearing socks.
“Uh… yes.” We joined the girls at the fire and were promptly snuggled up to said girls while Cadance taught Chrysalis how to tell when a fish was cooked thoroughly. Soon after, us ponies were eating fish on skewers while Chryssy had a nibble of mine just to see what it tasted like. It ended with me and Chrysalis sharing our skewer. It was a bit of a surprise, seeing just how much we all got along after a day, but like… especially Cadance and Chrysalis.
They had to coordinate that hip swaying thing. They just knew it would break mine and Shining Armor’s brains. Then the whole sock thing.
“I think you two are just gonna take this whole roadtrip to torture us stallions with your lady-charms,” I noted after we finished our food.
“Well, what else are me and Cadance supposed to do? We’re running tests to see which of you two are cuter, what turns you on the most, all that fun stuff. I’ve been alive for a thousand years, and Cadance believes she can learn a thing or two from me. So far, it has been rather exciting, especially when you started watching my hips, you naughty little stallion.”
“In all fairness, I have no excuse. They’re nice hips.”
Cadance giggled. “Oh dear, you two are getting along so much better than I would’ve expected.” She hugged Shining Armor. “I’m glad we left Canterlot when we did; initially Celestia and Luna told us to go along with you, since we needed to head home anyways, so that we could try and manipulate you into coming back to Luna’s embrace. I don’t see myself doing that, it’s messed up and unfair to you, and…” She pointed at how Chrysalis started looking angry. “You want to-”
“If I see Princess Luna again, I am going to kick her flanks so hard that it’ll send her flying to the moon!” Chrysalis vibrated in sheer rage for a moment. “You were at least upfront with what those old hags were trying to do, which I do appreciate. I assume you two are just here to enjoy the ride and get smuggled home because of the impending war?”
“Yeah…” Shiny rubbed the back of his head. “Luna rubbed us both the wrong way after what she had said to Ostri, on top of all the other things she’s apparently been doing to him. Poor fella just needs a moment to relax and unwind.”
“And this road trip helped me do that,” I noted as I sipped on ‘canned coffee’. “I’m having a blast at just having some peace and quiet.”
The next few days were pretty much the same, travel a few miles west, take a detour if necessary, then we stop, have lunch, and keep moving. This repeated until we reached Baltimare. Much like Baltimare, it was on the coast, but not of the ocean. Baltimare was on the coast of a huge lake that was more akinned to an inland sea than a lake. It essentially took up the spot where Ohio should’ve been, and Baltimare was on the coast of that. We stopped when we reached a small suburb, stretched our legs out at the park, and started walking.
“How do you know nopony will steal your wagon?” Cadance asked.
“Blaze hit it with an invisibility spell. Nopony’s even gonna know it’s there.”
“Huh… I never thought about doing that before.”
“That is because we Kitsune are masters at hiding things, or ourselves, and are naturals in spells that conceal us, or whatever we wish to hide. My kind likes to remain elusive for a reason, Cadance. This is how we continue to remain elusive.” She hummed. “Though I am not doing that good of a job at it myself; I am only the pet of a pegasus, traveling with a rather… renowned Queen.” Now was a good time to mention that everypony was staring at our group.
With a kitsune, the Crystal Empire’s princess and prince, Chrysalis, and myself, we were an odd little group.
“How… is it demeaning for you to be Ostri’s pet?” Cadance asked. “I know you love him, but you’re clearly a sapient being.”
“It does not. I am more animalistic than you think; using telepathy is still rather difficult for me. It’s hard conveying animalistic thoughts into that of the Equish language. I rather enjoy being petted, I like playing fetch,” now was a good time to mention that Blaze was carrying her rubber ball in her mouth. “And I love being around Ostri, so it’s a win-win. We’re also soulmates, literally soulmates, so there’s also that. If I wanted to be treated with respect, I wouldn’t demand belly rubs at every opportunity. However, I do not care for such things.”
“...Soulmates?” Cadance asked.
“Don’t question it, Cadance,” I waved a hoof. “Basically me and Blaze are best buds.”
“Alright, then, Ostri. So why did you want to stop in Baltimare, and why did we stop so far away from downtown?” We were only a couple miles south of downtown, it was still kinda far, but I guess that was a fair question.
“You saw the map I’ve got in the wagon, right?” Cadance nodded. “Well, Equestria is mostly centered around the mountain range that Mount Canterlot happens to be on,” Chrysalis chose now to give me a more pocketable, if I had pockets, version of the map of Equestria. I pointed at where the Appalachian mountain range was. “It just happens that Mount Canterlot is surrounded by mostly flat terrain that allows for places like Ponyville to exist. In my world, which is very similar to yours, just different sea levels and slight differences in geography.” Cadance and Shining Armor were looking over my shoulders as we watched. Chrysalis, because of her beautifully long legs, could easily see what I was pointing at without looking over my shoulder.
I pointed to where Maryland was, which was almost untouched by Equestria. “This is where Baltimore, the human equivalent of Baltimare is located.” I pointed to the Great Buckeye Lake, aka where Ohio should be. “Baltimare is right here, though. With that said, I wanted to see this place, since it’s also on the way to the Badlands and Manehattan; two other places I wanna stop at.” I noted how the streets stopped suddenly and went down to a little dock, which led to the complex canal system that Baltimare was apparently renowned for.
“This is where I wanted mine and Chrysalis’s first date, me, trying to row her down a canal in a gondola, failing while Chryssy makes fun of me, and we have a good laugh… and dinner after all is said and done. That, that is why I want to come to Baltimare, Cadance.” Cadance’s eyes widened before drifting to me and Chrysalis.
“By the Sun…” she whispered. “I think it just now hit me that you two are genuinely dating now,” Cadance chuckled. “Well, I always did want to explore the city back when I wasn’t a princess. Me and Shining Armor can watch Blaze for you while you and Chrysalis get started on your date.”
“That would be awesome. This is why you’re the best princess, Cadance.” Blaze immediately started flanking the pink alicorn.
“Enjoy your date!” Blaze said before picking Cadance up by the scruff of her neck and started carrying her deeper into the city. Shining Armor was shaking his head, but followed the kitsune along like an obedient puppy.
Once those three were out of sight, Chrysalis nuzzled me. “I didn’t think you wanted this place to be the spot for our first date,” she whispered.
“Is… this bad?”
“No, I’m quite pleasantly surprised. Usually the female changeling, or female pony making date plans.”
“Mmm, usually with humans, it’s kinda impressive for the guy to come up with plans for the date. I think. I dunno. This is only my second time dating anyone; I’m only mentally about nineteen, Chrysalis.”
“...What?” Chrysalis asked. “Nineteen!?”
“Yeah. I was mentally eighteen when I first started dating Luna. I will admit, I was a bit of a prick during that time. I like to think that I’ve improved, but I probably didn’t-”
“Ostri, you’re barely nineteen, you are an adult, but you are quite young. I still wish to try dating you, but do know that I am going to be cautious. I know how easy it is to manipulate somepony so young. I want this to be my first, genuine relationship, not a manipulation…” Chrysalis snarled. “Those two assholes had to know how young you were, and ruined you. If I had enough love, I’d beat Tartarus into Celestia and shove Luna’s head up her own flanks!” Chrysalis shook her head before nuzzling me. “Sorry, Ostri. Even though I have standards, and while I know I am not a good changeling, I just…
“What Luna did is wrong even to me. I am the same changeling that almost took over Equestria, at the expense of every mare, stallion, and foal. The fact that Celestia knew what she was doing, and urged Luna into helping, and Luna doing what she did without questioning her sister?” Chrysalis pulled me in for a nice, long hug. I blinked a couple of times, before leaning into it.
“Come now, this is a date, not me talking about how I will personally beat the flanks off of those two horrid ponies. Let’s enjoy our afternoon. Shall we, Ostri?”
We proceeded to find a place where we could rent out gondolas, and we were promptly denied service because of Chrysalis being Chrysalis. So we were just sitting on a bench, on one of the many docks for the canals. I was sitting like a human, holding my head in my hooves as I was grumbling about ponies being racist. Chryssy was rubbing my back, in a way Luna never did; a comforting away that made me feel good about myself.
“You don’t need to give me a ride in a boat, Ostri, you are aware of that right?”
“I still wanted to. It would’ve been such a good date too!” I pouted. “I was looking forward to this and everything!”
“I know, dear. I’m disappointed that you couldn’t pull through on your plans, but take it from me, Ostri. As a mare that has had many plans literally blow up in her face, just let it go. We can still possibly get a gondola if I transform and rent one out…” She paused. “Nevermind, that stupid stallion required an ID and proof of citizenship in Equestria to rent a boat.” She hugged me. “We can get ice cream, you tell jokes as stallions like to do, and we can share stories. That is rather typical of pony courtships.”
“Mmm, alright. I do have a really fun one my Dad used to tell me.”
“And what was it?” Chrysalis asked.
“I dunno the joke. My Dad never told me that.”
“...Why is that?”
“Dad left before I was born. My Mom did tell me the joke…” I pointed at myself. “It was me, since I’m a shitty joke; she did drop me as soon as I was born too.”
“Oh my, bucking, Hive, Ostri. That is messed up.”
“Hey, it’s not all that bad. At least what Luna did to me was… only the third worse thing to happen to me? Or second? Being a horse isn’t too bad.”
“Ostri, ‘horse’ is a slur for ponies.”
“I know. Still, being dumped by Luna was the second worst thing to happen to me, an orphan.” Chrysalis smirked. “Hey, it’s making you smile at least.”
“You are lucky that I enjoy a little dark humor. Do you know what the loudest noise in the emergency room is in hospitals?” She asked.
“The heart rate monitor flatlining?” I asked. We both blinked, before we started giggling like a pair of idiots. “God we are awful.” I leaned into her while she let out the cutest little giggle I’ve heard in a hot minute. “Wanna go grab dinner somewhere? We’ll have to get takeout.”
“I wouldn’t mind eating physical food right now, as long as there are no apples; I’m a little allergic. However, why must we get takeout?” Chrysalis asked.
“I like seeing your gorgeous face over whatever disguise you can come up with. So we need to get takeout so I can keep looking at it while we eat dinner.”
“...Ostri, that is the cheesiest, most botched attempt of flirting I’ve ever heard from a stallion. And I’ve been told my hooves are sexy.”
“...But they’re hooves.”
“I know.” I guess foot fetishes are a thing in ponyland too. “I do appreciate the effort. Though I doubt I can be the prettiest thing you’ve ever seen.”
“You are very pretty, though. And awesome!” I gestured to all of her. “Cute, floppy little ears, lovely mane and tail, badass fangs? The horn being jagged? Fucking nice. You look badass, and you’ve got nice legs, and beautiful eyes. She lowered herself so I could properly position her head with my hooves. “You’re beautiful, Chryssy.”
“I don’t think I’ve heard anypony say that to my natural form before,” Chrysalis giggled. “It feels nice, being called pretty, you know.”
“I sure hope you like being called pretty; if you didn’t, I’d question my approach of dating anything female.”
“Way to ruin the moment, Ostri! You could’ve stayed silent, we kiss, and then we go get dinner! Dammit!”
“What can I say? I ruined parents’ lives so much that they died to death… I think.” We chuckled and shared another kiss.
Meanwhile.
“I knew they’d kiss on the first date!” Cadance hoof pumped from a rooftop. She and Blaze had been following the couple to the gondola rental shop, up until they sat on a bench. Shining Armor got dragged along for the ride, while both the alicorn and kitsune were placing bets.
“They aren’t kissing, they’re nuzzling each others’ noses now. Though they were kissing for a brief moment. Nothing more than a peck,” Blaze clapped her paws. “Oh, this is going to do so much for Ostri!”
“I know! After what my… they aren’t my aunts anymore, but those two. Well, after what Princess Celestia and Luna have done to him, Ostri needs every bit of good he can get. Chrysalis… admittedly has been getting mentally deranged since her latest defeat; she deserves this too. I’m just glad that the two of them seem to be getting along nicely.” She watched as Ostri walked into a nearby restaurant and walked out with two takeout boxes, one entree, and one box full of breadsticks. The entree was spaghetti.
“And… he is stealing an idea from a story in his world,” Blaze rolled her eyes as Ostri and Chrysalis accidentally kissed after they both got ahold of one magically long noodle.
No, Chrysalis did not magically make that happen; she only planned that out the moment she realized that they were going to a Poman restaurant.
“Can we go get ice cream like we planned?” Shining asked. “Or are we just going to follow those two around like a bunch of creeps?"
“We will, after Chrysalis and Ostri… phewy, Ostri fell asleep on a bench…” Chrysalis turned one of her wings into that of a pegasus, before slowly draping it over her stallion. She nuzzled Ostri, and glared at anypony that so much as glared in her general direction; they might want to harm her and possibly hurt Ostri in the process.
Though Chrysalis made it clear; Ostri was hers, and hers alone.
Meanwhile, in an Apple Jack pulled a wagon not too far east with her friends in it. They had been trailing Ostri’s group ever since Princess Cadance and Shining Armor had gone with them for undisclosed reasons. Apple Jack, personally, didn’t see the point. Ostri wasn’t the best pony, sure, and he did blow up an invading warship, but Ostri didn’t deserve what happened to him, constantly being lied to, betrayed, and manipulated, and treated overall like shit.
It also didn’t help that Apple Jack watched as, for the first time ever since Luna’s consort returned, that Luna was genuinely upset about ‘how she ruined the love of her life’. Apple Jack was there, when the two initially talked in the throne room. That wasn’t genuine. Nothing, nothing that either of the Royal Pony Sisters had done until Ostri finally left Canterlot and Ponyville behind was genuine.
Meanwhile, Ostri had been pretty honest with how he was feeling. Apple Jack already sided with Ostri's honesty more than she sided, or trusted, the princesses at the moment.
It didn’t help that Twilight, as much as AJ wanted to stick with her friend, was sticking by Princess Celestia until the bitter end, apparently. Since Twilight and Celestia had the idea of sending Shining Armor and Cadance with their group, because according to some unicorn bullshit, that the farm pony couldn’t be asked to understand, Twilight can track where her brother is. By extension, if Shining Armor is with Ostri, Twilight can track Ostri. Cadance and Shining Armor weren't even in on the plan; they just thought of it as a vacation with the added bonus of being able to go home and avoid the war.
Pinkie, didn’t really care about what was going on except she did say this:
“You know, Twilight, Ostri looked pretty happy before we showed up at his camp last time.” She pointed out. “Then he stopped smiling as soon as Princess Celestia opened her mouth. He smiled when I asked if I could plan his wedding reception out. I bet Ostri’s pretty happy, finally has a marefriend that cares about him, he and Cadance get along just fine, too. He’s got a super, super duper awesome pet fox that he loves so much! And I bet he and Shining Armor are best friends now!"
“What’s your point, Pinkie?”
“Ostri should be left alone! He only got mentally abused while he was depressed after Princess Luna broke up with him in one of the harshest ways I’ve ever seen! Plus he doesn’t seem a day older than twenty, Twilight; at a minimum he’s five years younger than all of us. Don’t you think that going after him, when he is clearly dangerous and mentally unstable, is a good idea?”
“He killed a ship full of yetis! Princess Celestia said we should try and reform him!” Twilight didn't feel the need to add that she could break Ostri in half six times over with her magic.
“Ostri saved Canterlot from being invaded, Twilight. Also, Ostri doesn’t need reforming, he needs time away from everypony, and time with his loved ones. He's getting that right now, so he'll finally start smiling again.” Pinkie said calmly. “Seriously stop. I don’t want to make anypony angry.”
After that, Pinkie went back to her normal, bubbly self. Everypony felt a full body shiver; never before had Pinkie been so calm, or concise when speaking.
It was horrifying to say the least.
At some point, the only unicorn in the group decided to chime in. “I, for one, think he is rather barbaric! What kind of stallion turns Princess Luna for Queen Chrysalis?” Rarity asked. “That creaton should be locked up!”
“Well,” Rainbow scratched the back of her head. “It sounded like Ostri all but swore his allegiance to Princess Luna. And Luna dumped him. Then she decided to do what she did to him. If that were me, I would’ve blown up the castle. I don’t think Ostri’s that bad, girls. He did technically save everypony from an invasion twice. He at least has good intentions no matter how extreme they are.
“On top of that, Ostri hasn’t done anything objectively illegal to Equestria. Breaking a princess’s heart isn’t a crime as far as I can tell. Blowing up some griffins a thousand years ago, and an invading airship are technically crimes against the yetis and griffins.” Never before had anypony heard Rainbow Dash use actual, somewhat sound reasonig before. Something js seriously wrong. Pinkie being serious? Rainbow thinking things through? What the bucknis going on?
“He uhm…” Fluttershy whispered. “Ostri said he’d let me study Blaze if she was okay with it. Ostri’s scary, but… he just needs somepony to be nice to him. If Queen Chrysalis is staying in check because of him, and Queen Chrysalis is keeping Ostri in check, then it’s a good thing.”
“And,” Discord suddenly appeared out of nowhere. “While I am going to enjoy the incoming chaos, I must agree with Fluttershy on this one, or she won’t let me hold her. What that stallion is capable of doing is so deliciously chaotic, and you’re helping to fuel it, Twilight. By the way, Shining Amror stopped trying to ‘get information’ on Ostri after the first night. He’s just curious about Ostri’s group now; he shares one bottle of whisky with Ostri and they’re best buds! Heck, what’s more chaotic is that good ol’ Chryssy and Cady are getting along swimmingly!”
“But… Ostri said he’d let Cadance die!”
“No, he didn’t, actually.” Discord pulled out the script for Dawn of a New Day and started reading it. “He said he wouldn’t guard Cadance, but after some consideration, Ostri offered his services to Cadance if she ever wanted them. It’s weird; the only alicorn that has shown Ostri kindness in recent times is the only one he’d willingly put his life on the line for. I mean, come on Twilight, wasn’t one of your ‘friendship lessons’ about treating others how you want to be treated?”
“Ostri is treating everypony rather poorly-”
“Ostri happily watched the Cutie Mark Crusaders,” Apple Jack pointed out. “Saved them from a timber wolf and everything.”
“He’s a good sport,” Rainbow added. “He says I’m a better flier than he is, even though he’s as fast as I am. Straight up told me that I have a good reason to be confident in my flying abilities, too! I just hope he takes up my next offer for a race; it was fun having somepony that can almost keep up with me!”
The mares slowly started pulling into Baltimare. Discord had long since ran off to get popcorn. He knew that a certain, yellow pegasus and Queen were happily enjoying themselves at the moment. They had just concluded their date, of simply sitting on a bench together, since Chrysalis wasn’t legally allowed service, and eating dinner together. Ostri had long since fallen asleep, and Chrysalis was holding her coltfriend protectively, not letting anypony within three hoofsteps of her.
The group unknowingly passed by Ostri’s wagon, which was still invisible.
We met back up with Cadance and Shining Armor at the suburb we had left the wagon in. Blaze was happily tippy tappy from her perch inside of the wagon. Shiny and Cadance were eating ice cream. “So, how’d your day go, guys?” I asked as I sat flopped down in the grass nearby the wagon.
“It was going great, me and Shining Armor got to see the sights, Blaze gave us some more insight into how you and she are so close to each other, I didn’t know there was a spell that literally binds your souls together!” Cadance clapped her hooves. “I’m honestly glad I learnt that was a spell exclusive to kitsunes. I bet Twilight would love to be able to make a textbook out of all the notes I’m taking!” Cadance, did, in fact, have a notebook full of notes about kitsunes.
Me, being the kitsune expert that I totally was, sat there, and hummed. “I take it this is a favor that Twilight asked?”
“No, Twilie’s been trying to get into your old bedroom in the Castle of the Two Sisters forever,” Shining explained. “To study what was in the bedroom, as nopony besides Luna had been inside of it since she was banished. Twilight wanted to study what was in the bedroom until she caught Blaze sleeping on the bed one night, before promptly getting chased out by her,” Shiny chuckled. “She wrote to me and Cadance all about how she finally met a kumiho, but couldn’t study it.”
“...I told her this when we first met, is she met a kumiho, she woulda fucking died.”
“She knows that now. Blaze has been telling us some key differences between the kitsune and kumiho… such as all the unsavory things kumiho likes to do to other sapient beings when they are bored. Kitsunes… are way more proud of themselves than even I thought.” Cadance shrugged. “Blaze’s kind has always been a bit of a mystery, and I figured for Twilight’s birthday, I’d bring her a whole sleuth of notes and facts about kitsunes. Like how she literally will not let anyone but you or Chrysalis touch her tails. And she’s only letting Chrysalis do it because Chrysalis is your marefriend.”
“Mmm, yeah. Blaze and Fluttershy do get along, but Fluttershy kept toying with her tails.”
“I tried so, so hard not to growl at her, Ostri. I like Fluttershy; she’s just a sweet little angel, so I let her touch my tails even if I would rather not let her touch my tails.” Blaze scoffed. “Luckily she did catch on rather quickly and apologized to me when we were alone.” Huh. Fluttershy might not be too bad then. I guess I kinda forgot she was there; she’s pretty fucking quiet.
That's good at least. I may seek her out if I just want some silent company.
While I wasn’t a fan of Twilight, I could admit that Cadance wanting to do something nice for her sister in law was pretty nice.
“So, how was your date, Ostri?” Cadance asked.
“I fell asleep after we had dinner,” I pointed to Chrysalis. “She held me like a baby for a solid hour before deciding to wake me up…”
“I couldn’t help it! You looked so peaceful!”
“Well, that was the first nap I’ve taken in a minute where it wasn’t plagued with horrible dreams.”
Cadance raised an eyebrow. “What kind of dreams?”
“Just small, horrible things, like back when Everfree City was a thing. Blew up a bunch of griffins, heard them scream; some of them didn’t immediately die from the explosion of fireworks. It was not a pretty sight. Sometimes I dream and I do it, and I can clearly see every single griffin that was rolling around in pain. Sometimes I am one of the griffins that survived getting hit with a firework. Recently I’ve been dreaming of the airship I blew up. Sometimes it would be just me following a random yeti, seeing what their life was like before they died. Sometimes I dream that I’m Tempest Shadow, watching her men die.
“And thinking back on it, with those dreams, I kinda feel bad for that lady. Her horn’s broken, so she clearly went through some shit that resulted in it being broken. It’s just a shame that she couldn’t find help, or anything, really. I may go back to Canterlot and break her out of jail. Yeah, she’s a war criminal, but she clearly is alone. From what I can understand, most ponies don’t even leave Equestria, so seeing a pony come back to attack Equestria says a lot about what they’ve gone through.”
“...You are a lot more empathetic, given you threatened to kill her if she didn’t surrender,” Shining pointed out.
“It was that, or let the invasion continue. I’m only sane because I tried not to think of the soldiers I’ve killed as people. I didn’t personally stab anyone during either the invasion of Everfree City, besides that one general, or in the Canterlot Invasion. If I stab a person while looking them in the eyes… Fuck. I feel like a piece of shit already, I’d feel awful if I killed somebody and watched life leave their eyes. It’s why I initially saved Cadance from that one assassin. Why sit back and watch her get killed when I could make a difference?
“I clearly can’t be happy for long periods of time, if my time in Equestria is any proof of that so far. May as well try and save people that will actually be able to find joy.”
Shining Armor smirked. “And you said you only saved everypony at the Friendship Festival for Chrysalis and Blaze.”
“That had a large influence, I won’t even lie. I hated the idea of the festival, I hated that I was basically forced into attending. But ponies were going about their day, being happy, and enjoying their lives. Then these assholes show up and try to ruin it. They were gonna ruin it and hurt people. And… knowing that I did stop a lot of potential casualties, admittedly feels really good, man. It took a lot to obtain peace, but world peace is usually, and hardly, ever obtained through everybody becoming good friends.
“Hell, back home, everyone had super weapons that could blow the world to shit six or seven times over. Nobody, the people in power at least, liked each other. We got along, though, while others were ‘lightly encouraged’ to not use their super weapons, and play nice. Less they get wiped off the face of the earth.”
“Huh…” Cadance and Shining said at the same time. It looked like as they thought about it more, I wasn’t wrong. Or they now understood how awful the human race is. Either or; it’s probably a mix of both.
“To me,” Chrysalis said, wrapping a leg around my neck. “It sounds like my special somepony is finding a new purpose in life?”
“Maybe. It’s silly to think that I can be some sorta super hero, but hey, if I can keep some people safe so that they can live another day and continue experiencing happiness that I can’t have, I’ll try it.” Blaze nuzzled me. “I know, I’ve got you and Chrysalis; I’m just so emotionally fucked right now that I don’t know if I truly can be happy.”
“I know. As your soulmate, I can see what you see, feel what you feel, and know your thoughts. It hurts feeling a void inside of you, Ostri. You were so happy when you first returned, so happy to get your life back together after it got uprooted, and…” Blaze took one, long deep breath. “I hope that this new purpose you’ve found, or at least something that makes you feel good, will bring you happiness. You deserve it at this point. Now start smiling before I tickle you.”
“Whoa, we don’t… we don’t gotta go there, Blaze.” I raised both my forelegs and started backing up.
“Ostri… You blew raspberries into my belly a lot. I think it’s time I tickle your belly.” I couldn’t get away in time; Blaze caught me in a heartbeat, and since she actually has the body of a predator, she pinned me down, but instead of going for the throat with her teeth, she started licking my neck. It slowly turned into raspberries, dunno how she was doing that with her very obviously canine face, but… it fucking tickled. Everyone else just watched as my pet kitsune did her damned best to make me smile.
God damn did she do a good job. I was a giggly, limp mess, with my lower body being pinned down by Blaze’s chest, while my upper body was held in her forelegs. She was happily grooming me. “There it is,” she said as she ran her teeth through my mane. “You’re at least happy. It’s not joy, though. It is a common misconception, but I am at least glad you are still capable of being happy. I will ensure that you feel joy… I will do my best to piece you back together, Ostri. As your best friend, not your soulmate, not your pet, your best friend, I will help you. I may not act it a lot of the time, but I still do consider you a little kit; I will be your shield from the world. Emotional or physical.”
I woke up the next day snuggled up into Chrysalis’s embrace. It seems as though that at some point, which I wasn’t too against. Cadance and Shining Armor went and got a hotel room to… invest in some favorite adult pass times that wasn’t disappointment. In other words, they wanted to go have sex. I understandably didn’t ask where their hotel room was going to be, since it wouldn’t make a dent in my own personal funds; being a princess, and ruler, or the Crystal Empire had its benefits apparently.
Blaze was sleeping outside, I could see her laying flat on her side, adorably, she was using one of her tails as a pillow, and the others as a blanket. I kissed Chrysalis, brushed my teeth, and patted my fox on the head. I kinda felt bad; I was literally dating Chrysalis and I was spending so much time on Blaze. I’m sure Chrysalis is fine with it, and fully understands why, but I still felt bad. Blaze, so far, has just been the only thing that has remained a constant for me. Constantly friendly, constantly loved me, and hasn’t done me any wrong besides tickling the shit out of me last night.
Today, however, I wanted to go spend the day on my own. I loved Chrysalis, I want to spend more time with her. I love Blaze, I would not mind spending the day with her, but I just wanted some solitude. I grabbed a small coin purse, filled it up with a hundred bits, which should be more than enough to spend on food for the day, and other small things. I made sure I had my knife, even if I probably wouldn’t need it, it never hurts to be prepared. Chrysalis reached out and pulled me into a hug while her eyes were still closed.
“Going somewhere, Ostri?” She asked.
“I am.”
“Do you mind if I tag along?” she asked.
“I… I was hoping to at least use today on my own. We’ll be spending a couple days in Baltimare, Chryssy, I promise, that tomorrow, tomorrow I will spend the whole day with you. Just you, me, and whatever you wanna do.” Chrysalis purred when I started nipping her neck. “Just spend the day with Blaze; I know you two get along well, so…”
“I know. I don’t mind spending a day with her. And…” she got up nice and close to my ears. “I know you feel bad about not being able to give me some proper one on one time, Ostri. Don’t worry, I am a patient mare; if you wish to take things slow with me, please do. I would rather wait for you to feel ready, and be happy, than force you into something at all. If Blaze can make you happy, good. We both have mutually agreed to trying to piece you back together, while Blaze is trying to piece both of us back together…
“Frankly, you need her help more than I do. As long as I have somebody to interact with, like I do with you and Blaze, I am fine. I’m a highly social creature, and thrive in groups. Now, don’t let this old lady hold you back from some time alone; you need it.”
“Hey, you’re not just some old lady, you don’t look a day over twenty.”
Chrysalis giggled. “Thank you, Ostri. Now fucking go, go enjoy yourself, alright?” We shared a kiss, I gave one more headpat to Blaze, who conveniently woke up to just nuzzle me, before passing out again. She definitely knew what I was up to if what she said yesterday was any indicator.
As I started walking back up the street into the downtown area, I started seeing just how different the road was from one I’d see in New York. There were practically no sidewalks. There was no yellow paint, no concrete or tar, it was just a dirt road. Sure, downtown did get better, upgrading to a brick road, or something way closer to something you’d see in Rome rather than a typical road. It’s pretty much walking up or down the road, and just being polite about who goes first. Ponies are pretty racist, but they’re usually pretty polite to other ponies. I stood off to the side as a wagon passed by, and the next one waited for me to walk past them before they kept moving again.
I think if ponies weren’t incredibly racist, or mean to Chrysalis, I would be more willing to stay in Equestria… just far, far away from Canterlot.
While I was walking, I picked up a newspaper from the local newspaper colt, and, I will admit. Seeing a colt wearing a little ‘paperboy’ outfit was kinda cute. Yes, he did use puppy eyes to get me to take a newspaper. I was gonna need one anyways; it was wise to stay up to date, after all. It also at least showed that my heart was capable of doing things, such as finding things cute. Though I didn’t need a colt to help me do that; Blaze sleeping in her bundle of tails was the cutest thing I’ve ever seen. If I were a little more innocent, and didn't want to spend today alone, I would’ve crawled up into that bundle of tails and spent the day snuggled up under them with Blaze.
I walked into a nearby cafe to try and get breakfast. The waitress was pretty nice, she took my order, and was pretty nice. I just bought some waffles and some scrambled eggs. I asked for some water, since milk was fucking two bits. That was as much as the two waffles and handful of scrambled eggs I just ordered! Yeah, bits are pretty good, especially my older bits, which are apparently worth twice as much as the average bit. I looked up when I heard two chairs scoot. Low and behold, Cadance and Shining Armor.
“How’d y’all find me?” I asked.
“We just saw you on the way by,” Cadance admitted. “I’m surprised you don’t have Blaze or Chrysalis with you.”
“Eh,” I shrugged. “Humans have these ‘off days’ where they just want a night alone, or a day alone. Today just felt like it.”
“Oh… I feel that,” Shining grabbed Cadance. “C’mon, let’s go back to the wagon; I’m sure we can get Blaze and Chrysalis to do something with us; I’m sure you can abuse your princess-iness to make it so nopony can throw Chrysalis out.” Shining and I shared a ‘brolook’ as he pulled his wife away. I could tell that Cadance wanted to stick around and make sure I was alright, and I could appreciate that, but again, the gift of solitude. Sometimes it’s nice. I was given my plate, I thanked the waitress, and started reading the paper as I ate.
As it turned out, yeah, the Griffins did shut down the borders, but were allowing someponies, who were fleeing the country because of the way, to come through if they needed refuge. It was just official stuff like trains, or royal chariots that weren’t allowed in. I hummed; Celestia and Luna were basically twiddling their nonexistent thumbs; they weren’t even evacuating Canterlot when that would be a main target. It was the main target during the invasion Chrysalis pulled. Hell they weren’t evacuating Ponyville when that’s where six ponies, the only ones who can use the superweapon that is one of Equestria’s main defenses, were.
Discord was doing fuck all, but Celestia said she expected that.
The guards were supposed to wear their standard uniforms, and despite what I’ve told Luna and Celestia during the Battle of Everfree City, were keeping their captains in their typical uniforms. My tactics essentially followed what happened in that Patriot movie. Kill the people in charge first, take everyone else out. Because of how absolutely archaic these ponies still were to war, I bet that would still work. Oh… the guard doesn’t fucking have battle armor; most of what the guards are wearing is ceremonial gear.
What the fuck. That’s not even a question. Just what the fuck. How did Celestia and Luna spend their whole ass guard budget on ceremonial gear? Sure, it’s normal, but most countries back home still have proper field gear. Fuck, if that was standard gear, the guards were outright fucked when it came to moving anywhere. The yetis could hide in a bunch of bushes and just jump any guard units marching to and fro. I almost laughed at how Equestria didn’t use its trains to move guards out.
Granted, the storm king did apparently invade Manehattan with a small unit of yetis, and were taken down by the local police force, which had a swat team consisting of highly trained unicorns, before the guard was even dispatched. I saw a photo and… holy shit, how is this one city doing a better job and preparing its own armed forces than the government?
An ancient war hero was brought back from the past to fight the war with Equestria. My eyes twitched. There I was, on the second page, standing there with a firework and match in hoof.
“We summoned him, as he was once Luna’s lover, so we thought he would want to fight for us. But… sadly loyalty is hard to come by, apparently,” said Celestia during an interview. The. Living. Fresh. Fuck. Is. Wrong. With. This. FUCKING. Mare?! She has the fucking audacity to say that? She has the fucking gull to sit on her ass, after doing what she’s done, and talk shit about me? Fuck, I might join the Storm King and burn down Canterlot after mounting that cunt’s head on a fucking pike- no, no I don’t. As much as I fucking want to, Celestia is still Celestia, and Luna is still Luna. As much as I hate them now, I still don’t want to bodily harm either of them. Emotionally? All day, everyday, all day, everyway. But… These were the same mares I spent every day with. Hung out with Celestia after I tried to not be a prick to her, dated Luna.
I’m not gonna seek revenge for this. I’m going to be the bigger man in this instance, take it on the cheek, and just not deal with that shit.
“Sir,” the waitress took a seat in front of me. “I hate to bother you while you’re enjoying your breakfast,” I looked up and looked the pink mare in the eyes. She was wearing a simple hat, which had the cafe’s logo on it, and that was probably it for her uniform beyond the white apron she was wearing. “But… are you that stallion that saved Canterlot from the Storm King’s first invasion attempt? During the Friendship Festival?”
“Uh… depends.”
“Well, if you are, thank you. My cousin was at the Friendship Festival when you stepped in; I don’t care what the princesses say, you’re not a bad pony.” I blinked a few times. “So, are you Bald Ostrich, the war hero that was brought up in the newspaper?”
“Yeah. I just go by Ostri, though. Why’re-”
She stood up, and only then did I realize she was a pegasus. She draped a wing over my back, and nuzzled me. “Thank you, then. I wish you stuck around to try and fight for Equestria, but… you were never interviewed. You couldn’t give your side of the story. Why’re you fleeing Equestria?” She asked. Huh. Somepony’s trying to stay informed. I can respect that.
“I used to date Luna. Used to. She dumped me. She didn’t summon me, somepony named Starlight accidentally dragged me into the future, against my will, and Luna dumped me upon seeing me. Then she wouldn’t leave me alone, pretended like it was my fault that we broke up, and then said I didn’t deserve love. That’s why I’m not fighting anymore. Princess Cadance asked a favor from me, and since I actually don’t mind her, I agreed to smuggle her out of the country.
“Good choice that was, eh? She’s a good mare.”
“Oh… wait, Princess Luna did what to you?” She processed my very, very abridged story. “What the… so Princess Celestia lied?”
“More or less. Don’t matter; after I reach the Crystal Empire, I’m taking the Bering Land Bridge into Gilo Mono. I’ve got a friend from there and was hoping to see the sights. After I do that, I may settle down in the Crystal Empire; I hear it’s a nice place to live.”
“Good. I don’t think I’d want to fight for Equestria if the princesses did that to me.” The waitress stood up and bowed, and noticed my plate was clean. “Want me to take that?”
“Sure, lemme get my bits to-”
“Don’t worry about it. I’ll tell my boss that I just served a war hero-”
“No you aren’t. Take my money, miss. I don’t want ya getting in trouble.” I set my bits on the table. “Sounds fair?”
“...But how else can I repay you for what you did in Canterlot?”
“Simple; forget that you saw me. I was never here.”
“Alright… I still think you should let me pay your bill.” I put down twenty five bits, enough to buy groceries for a week.
“Then take this, take however much you need to pay off the bill, and keep the rest as a tip. I insist.” I stood up. “Thank you for being a bit more understanding than I would’ve expected.” The mare just stood there, wide-eyed at the amount of bits I put down, as I walked out of the restaurant… and walked nose to nose into the Twilight Sparkle. Her friends were behind her, at least most of them looked a little sorry.
I sat down at a picnic table, seeing as I don’t think I can actually flee, with Rainbow Dash being the better flier than I, Apple Jack’s definitely stronger than I am, and Twilight has magic that could kill me pretty easily. I grumbled, but luckily, I was sitting next to AJ; I didn't mind her. Apple Jack must’ve sensed my mood, or is good at reading faces, because she took her hat off and hugged me. I blinked a few times; I thought she’d hate me. Meh, if she doesn't, that's nice, at least I’ll have somepony to talk to while I ignore Twilight.
“Sorry about this, Ostri. But… Princess’s orders, and we can’t really argue with Twilight,” Apple Jack said. She reached into a saddlebag and pulled out an apple. “Want one?” She asked.
“Mmm,” I hummed. “I dunno, you just offered me an apple from one of the best farms in the country.” I won’t lie, Apple Family Apples must have coke in them.
“I know. Figured you might as well have some sort of comfort. If it were up to me, I’d be grabbing my family and getting the buck out of Equestria, and coming back to help fight the yetis that are invading.” She handed me the apple. “Well?”
I unsheathed my knife. “Bet. We can share this one, since I know you probably didn’t bring a lot of these, and this is a part of your travel supplies.”
“Put that knife away, Ostri,” Twilight demanded. “You’re just gonna-”
I took the knife and started peeling the apple at record speeds. I was kinda shocked with how precise I was. Every slice was perfect. “Anyone else want a slice besides Apple Jack?” I asked and soon, in mere seconds, the apple was skinned.
“I won’t turn down a snack,” Rainbow admitted. “Plus, watching you use that knife is kinda… awesome. I don’t think I’ve seen anypony use one so proficiently while cutting something before.”
“I have cupcakes!” Pinkie said. “So I’m good!” She pulled a cupcake out of her mane. Y’know, I’m fresh out of fucks to give, so I wasn’t gonna question how Pinkie did that. At least she’s not an asshat.
“It’s too early for brunch,” Rarity pointed out. “And I’m scared that you’ll find some way to poison us.”
“I wouldn’t mind one, Ostri,” Fluttershy almost whispered. So four slices, got it. I tossed the knife up a couple times, catching the handle every time, before quickly making work of the apple. “Y’all care about seeds? It’s a cultural thing from my home; I don’t fuck with apple seeds.”
“What kinda pony takes the seed out of the apple?” Apple Jack asked. “Kinda pointless to do that.”
“When apple seeds used to be bad for you, you would too. Just something I can’t let go of.” I cut the seed out of my slice before handing a slice to the four ponies who actually wanted one.
“How the hay didn’t you cut yourself?” Rainbow asked. “And can you teach me how to do that?”
“Sure, just catch me one day if I come back to Equestria, and stuff.” Twilight was glaring at me. “What? Can mares bleed out the ass like human females can?” I may get screwed here, but I was at least going to mentally screw with Twilight before I go out.
“W-what!?” Twilight and Rarity blurted out, before Twilight quickly regained her composure. “No, I’m just wondering why you four are being nice to him! And Ostri, you made Princess Luna cry. You helped instigate a war-”
“No, the Storm King did, I just retaliated.” I corrected it. “He invaded first, and his demands that you, Luna, and Celestia were basically killed. Same with Cadance, which I wasn’t gonna let happen; Cadance doesn’t deserve that shit. It’s his dumbass fault for not preparing for everything, like a pony that will actually fight back.” I took a bite of my apple slice and started speaking with my mouth full, like a gangster. Honestly, I would be angry, I would be pissed, but I was done giving a shit. If Twilight tried bringing me back, I was gonna slap the shit out of her, spank her, and hand her back to Shining Armor and Cadance.
Or just let her drag me away. I honestly can’t be asked to care about what happens anymore.
“B-what!?” Twilight asked.
“He did make a good point,” Apple Jack pointed out. “Technically, the Storm King swung first.”
“And I fucking shot him in the knee. Boom.” I chuckled. “I want to fucking die,” I grumbled. “Twilight, I know you wanna do whatever fucktarded thing you wanna do, but like… Today was a potato day for me. I wander the city, do fuck all, get lunch at some point, fuck off to somewhere else, eat dinner, and head back home to cuddle with Blaze, or probably Chrysalis. Then I was gonna actually take Chrysalis out with me to the city; I promised her that much and I intend on keeping it.
“And also, the only reason why I’ve not stabbed any of you yet, is because Shining Armor and Cadance wouldn’t be very happy if I did that. And also four of you aren’t too bad, admittedly, which is why those four haven’t been stabbed in the face..”
“Oh please,” Rarity rolled her eyes. “You’re rather barbaric, cruel, and chose to break the heart of a princess-”
“Who broke his first, Rarity,” Rainbow pointed out. I slowly closed my mouth and reached over to Rainbow, who was on the other side of Apple Jack from me. “Are you gonna hit me?”
“No, I’m brohoofing you. You’re using some fucking logic. Thank the fucking lord for somepony having a god damn brain!”
Rainbow smirked and brohoofed. “You owe me another race, by the way.”
“I’m down; I need to get better at turning before I do that though; you’d kick my ass if I don’t.”
Twilight and Rarity were just sitting there slack jawed. “Rainbow, that is a criminal.”
“He didn’t even do anything illegal,” Fluttershy pointed out. She was actually speaking up now… she’s getting mad, oh boy. “Twilight, Ostri legitimately isn’t that bad-”
“He said he’d stab us on sight if he wasn’t traveling with my brother!” Twilight growled.
“I’m doing that out of respect for him, Twilight. I don’t want my friend to have to attend his little sister’s funeral. I may be a lot of things, I may be a sack of shit. I may not even be a good person, but I do know how important family can be to people. Shiny and Cadance absolutely adore you, despite you being a cunt, and they love you. Love’s dangerous, Twi, it can feel good, and it can fucking hurt. It fucking hurts when the people you love die.” AJ gave me a sympathetic look and gave me another hug. Nevermind, Fluttershy beat her to it.
“You just need some time alone. Come on now,” she coaxed. “I’ll take you to a more secluded spot in the city, and leave you be, young stallion.” I cocked an eyebrow at her. “You’re not even twenty years old yet, Ostri, I can tell. I can also tell what it looks like when an animal has completely given up any fight it has in it; you’ve been beaten down so much that you aren’t even attempting to fight back… even if it is for more reasons other than just being defeated.”
“God damn, Blaze was right; you’re a sweetheart.” I genuinely smiled for the first time in a minute. “Thank you, Fluttershy. You’re a good mare.” I got up, only to feel something big and fluffy from behind me. I slowly turned my head around and came face to face with Blaze. “WHOA!” I fell on the table, or would’ve if Blaze didn’t grab me with her magic, spun me around in her magic, and grabbed me by the scruff of my neck. I involuntarily went limp in her grasp. I could feel Blaze’s animosity through our bond.
“Why did you use your brother as a sentient tracking device? I’m only here because Shining Armor said he sensed you in the area.” She glared at the rest of the mares present. “Did none of you attempt telling Twilight that she is being more of a bitch than I am?” She asked. She glared at each one, save Fluttershy. She actually nuzzled Fluttershy. “Thank you for at least making an attempt to move my colt away from the situation before I arrived. I can tell that Ostri is only really feeling any hostility towards Twilight Sparkle and Sparkling Rarity.” Rarity’s eyes widened at that. “I can blow your brains up with a thought, so please, do not follow me or Ostri. He greatly expressed his desire to be left alone for today, so I shall find somewhere where he can be alone, and return for him once he is sufficiently out of his current mood swing.”
I felt Cadance and Shining Armor walk past us as Blaze slowly backed away from the table. “Twilie,” Shining asked sternly. “Why did you follow me and Cadance?” Shining sounded fucking mad. No, that isn’t anger, that’s disappointment.
“Because Princess Celestia tasted me with trying to convince Ostri to come back to Canterlot with us-”
“To fight a war he already wants no part in,” Shining said bluntly. “Twilight, please, please think for a moment. Say you found somepony you loved, loved with every bit of your soul. In the same way I love Cadance?” It seemed like Twilight was beginning to listen. “Now imagine they broke up with you, and blamed you for the break up. Now imagine that they mentally abuse you for however long, to the point that it leaves you emotionally broken. Now, imagine how much you would want to come running back to that pony with your forelegs wide, wide open?” Shiny asked.
“I would if they wholeheartedly apologize!”
Shining Armor took a deep, long breath. “Okay, how much do you trust Cadance’s judgment on relationships?”
“A lot, of course.”
“She doesn’t think Ostri and Luna can even come close to what they once had,” Shining Armor said plainly. “You may not like her, but Chrysalis is an even more capable empath than Cadance is, and she can sense just how broken Ostri is. Blaze, who is literally soulbound with Ostri, can feel exactly what Ostri is feeling. Go ahead and ask her how Ostri is…” He turned back to me. “Thank you for not immediately attacking her, Ostri. I know you’ve been through a lot, and are a second away from snapping, so thank you for at least having some self control.”
“Man,” I chuckled. “If I had anyone like you growing up, I probably wouldn’t have been such a sack of shit. Well, I wouldn’t have been such a sack of shit if I had anyone growing up.” I nodded to him. “Take care of your sister, man.” Shining nodded while Twilight and Blaze apparently had a very, very silent, telepathic conversation.
Twilight slowly looked at me. “Ostri…” she’s starting to look remorseful finally. “Blaze just… showed me what you’re feeling. I didn’t even know the type of magic that Blaze was using even existed. How, how mentally distraught are you that you aren’t even willing to fight back anymore? If we brought you back to Canterlot, without anypony interfering, you wouldn’t have fought the issue, would you?”
“Honestly, I’m tired, Twilight. I’m being dead honest here, when I say this. So far, my life has been a shit. Aside from Luna and Celestia at first, and then Chrysalis and Blaze. I’ve nobody to call family. Grew up in an orphanage, which did very little for me, and I’ll admit, I grew into a real asshole. Treating it like I owned the place when I first showed up in Everfree City, I told Celestia stuff. I told her to look after her sister in a way that wasn’t super great or respectful.” I smiled a little. “God damn did Luna make me feel loved and cared for when we were dating.
“That got torn away as soon as I was beginning to actually grow. I was already getting accustomed to the fact that I’m no longer human, which to this day, feels horrible. I see the woman I love so coldly drop me like a used tissue. Discarded with very little thought until I’m ‘useful’. I was about to finish my schooling when I showed up in Equestria, I had friends I knew I wasn’t gonna see again. I get to Equestria, and begin getting acquainted only to get uprooted again. I’ve gotten used to the fact that my life sucks, and being in this more… modern age just reminds me of how much I fucking hate being alive sometimes.
“If you dragged me back, I woulda let it happen. I would’ve let myself get ‘all the rewards and awards’ from leading this country to victory in a war when it never needed my help. I would’ve ended up hanging myself once it was all said and done, if Blaze and Chrysalis weren’t here, then I legitimately would’ve just crumpled and let myself waste away. What makes me useful anyways? I can kill people, woohoo… Glad that’s all I’m good at besides leading a life of shit.” I looked Twilight in the eye. “Tell me, why would I want to live? Say the world is fucked up, and Blaze and Chrysalis were either dead or gone. I woulda let myself starve to death in my old bedroom, Twilight. I’m tired of trying to find my footing, but I’m trying to for the people I love.”
Twilight walked around the table and placed a hoof on my shoulder. “Ostri…”
“Be quiet, Twi. We can have a more civilized conversation after tomorrow. I was only going to stay in Baltimare until tomorrow night, but I’ll stay one more time so you don’t gotta hunt me down again. If you can give me a legitimate-no, I won’t fight a war-but we can talk. It won’t end with me going back to Canterlot; I’ve still got a promise to Shining Armor and Cadance to make good on, and a marefriend and the fluffiest best friend I could ever ask to live for. Chin up; you got people that love ya, go enjoy the day with them and apologize for not listening to them. You’re a princess, but it doesn't mean shit if nobody loves you, but you clearly have people that love you.
“Just listen to your friends every now and then. Good friends will tell you when you’re being a dumbass. Bad friends would’ve joined in and hounded you into making me come with you.” I pointedly looked at Rarity. “You’re a bitch. I hope you can prove me otherwise in a couple days, if not, that’s a shame, it doesn’t really matter.” With that, Blaze turned to start walking up the street to find me somewhere more reclusive.
“Hey Blaze,” I said. “Where’s Chrysalis?” I asked. “Or Cadance?”
“Chrysalis heard Twilight was here, and Cadance stayed behind to talk her out of killing Twilight.”
“Good. I really didn’t want to witness anyone dying, or be the cause for anyone dying. Seriously, that is one more thing I just don’t want.” I took a long, deep breath. “Can you stay with me, Blaze?” Now was a good time that she had carried me into a park and laid me under a tree. She had gotten up to leave when I asked that. “I… I know I said I wanted a day alone, but…” I shivered. “I just need somebody here with me, Blaze. I’m so fucking done with everything, Blaze. Just… Please wrap me up in your tails, and hold me.”
“Okay, Ostri.” The moment she laid down, I immediately ran up to her side, and flopped into her. In a heartbeat, I buried my face into her shoulder and started crying. “Ostri…” She whispered. “You… No, you’re not alright, that much is clear. I don’t think I’ve seen you cry before.” The two tails rubbing my back at least felt a little good. “What exactly happened? I am only not reading your mind right now because I know you need to get this off of your chest.”
“Why can’t I be left the fuck alone?” I asked.
“...Please elaborate, Ostri.”
“Why can’t Luna and her fucking cunt of a sister leave me the hell alone? I’m trying to be civil, I’m trying to not physically lash out at them. I just want some peace and god damn quiet after the fucking rollercoaster of bullshit my life’s been over the last couple of years. I just want to travel, see this new world since I could never really explore my own, and spend my time on the planet with you and Chrysalis. I hope that I can also at least leave the world a little better than it was when I came.” I sobbed. “Just… why? Just. Fucking. Why?” I still had the newspaper as I wasn’t entirely done with it.
Blaze read the article and slowly started growling.
“That. Fucking. Piece. Of. Shit.” Blaze snarled. She shook her head. “Ostri, do you want me to go take care of those princesses? They straight up lied about you, and I personally will not stand for it.”
“Blaze, no. Retaliating won’t make anything better. After I have that chat with Twilight in a couple of days, we’re going to stop in the middle of nowhere for a day, and just camp. Just somewhere, nice, quiet, and the ever fresh fuck away from everything. Hell, I’m tempted… to just grab you, walk into the nearby woods, and just camp. Just like old times when a night of oddjobs left us in the middle of fuckall, sitting around the campfire, watching the stars, and simply just having some time alone.”
“I wouldn’t mind that. Perhaps invite Chrysalis along as well? She may say she’s fine with just spending time with Cadance and Shining Armor, frankly I’m shocked at how well they get along, but we are technically her ‘Hive’ now even if you don’t realize it. She probably benefits a lot from being around us, since we supply her with emotions to eat, and I know she wants to spend more time with you, even if I am present.”
“That wouldn’t be too bad of an idea…” I sighed and picked up the newspaper. “Might as well see what else is popping around Equestria; as much as I’ll hate reading this shit in the coming weeks, I know I have to. It’s better to not be in the dark than to get blindsided.” I was also going to try my best to try and avoid… “Say Blaze, didn’t you notice how more ponies were leaving the downtown area?” I asked. As I was saying, I was gonna do my best to try and avoid the places that the Storm King invaded, and if he already did invade, well, I might actually roll up and try and help out. Just because I’m ‘not loyal’ doesn’t mean I’m unwilling to help people out.
“I have, why do you ask?”
“Well, the Storm King’s country is located somewhere in… China, I believe, or just somewhere in Asia, since he’s sending forces from the east and west., apparently. The fucker’s going for the big cities first, since those are where the most ponies are at.” Blaze peeked over my shoulder and started reading it with me.
“The downtown area is a main target, according to changeling spies that were smuggled into the Storm King’s forces.” I blinked.
“Why the fuck did this King Thorax, and the press, announce that there were changelings spying on this asshole? Like bro, you aren’t supposed to publicly announce this shit.” I facehoofed. “Does nobody on the fucking planet use their brain-” I kept reading and read what the heck the griffins were doing. “Oh hey, these guys improved,” I chuckled and pointed at the articles. The griffins essentially made fireworks stronger, and smaller, and could shoot right out of a crossbow… Essentially these guys made muskets.
“A long, long time ago, my ancestors came up with a way to take over Equestria, a thousand years ago. Once, a proud tribal leader decided to head for the heart of Equestria, Everfree City…” Holy fuck. Why is the only fucking race on the planet that remembers what I did the griffins?
“It’s because of how severely you beat them, Ostri. Few survivors, if any, ran back to the north and told stories of why Equestria was a lost cause. You made them fear you, and also respect you, look."
King Beak also says this:
“If the Princesses don’t want that pony they summoned from a thousand years ago, I’ll hire him. A pony that was the mastermind behind fully stopping an invasion on his homeland is a pony I want in my payroll: Just imagine how much better the griffin military could benefit from such a being!” I smiled at that. I knew I had another potential home if I didn't settle down in the Crystal Empire, or in Honshu. I hummed for a while and looked at Blaze.
“Hey bud, why… were you… reluctant to lead me and Chryssy through your homeland?” I asked.
“I am a kitsune that, when I had blood, had some kumiho blood mixed into it. Hybrids are not usually accepted in Honshu, and also, the territory is shared by kitsune and kumiho. I don’t want to risk running into another creature and having them kill you or Chrysalis because they were bored and saw a weaker, ‘inferior’ being that looked fun to toy with.” She shook her head. “I can defend you, and give everyone a reason to not harm either of you, but I want to ensure your wellbeing, not roll the dice and hope for the best.”
“That’s fair…”
“I will still lead you through Honshu; I may be somewhat young, but I will be damned if I let anyone hurt you or your mate. I just don’t know how viable living in Honshu would be.”
“It would be nice and far away from actual society…” I hummed. “Nah. I offered several ponies, like Rainbow, a race, Cadance a security guard if she needs it. I still need to ship Luna a dildo so she can pleasure herself without ruining another stallion’s life.” Blaze snorted.
“Oh, we have to do that, Ostri. That would be funny!” Blaze let out that human-like laugh, but it seemed to have changed just a little. It actually sounded more adorable than haunting because it came out of something not human. This just sounded like a cute girl, giggling away. “I know Ostri, I am adorable.” I climbed up on her back. “Hey, you’re the horse here, I should be riding on your-” she stopped when my wings slowly started going up and down her neck, and just slightly past her chin. “Oh, that feels good, please continue doing that.”
And that’s how Chrysalis found us, well, Cadance, Chrysalis, and Shining Armor.
“I see you are doing better now,” Chrysalis noted.
“Yeah…” Blaze fell asleep while I was petting her, but I continued to practically lay on top of her and continue petting her. It felt nice, Blaze liked it, and it was helping me a bit better about myself. “Ah, me and Blaze had each other’s backs for so damn long, that…” I shook my head. “Ah, sorry about up and disappearing, saying that I wanted the day alone and whatnot, just to do this,” I gestured to the kitsune I was using as a bed. “I just think if I didn’t have some form of company, I woulda threw myself in the canals and let this nightmare of a life end.”
“...And here I was thinking you’d lash out at Twilight and her friends.” Chrysalis walked around, wrapped her forelegs around the both of us, and laid her head on top of mine. Despite me having a kitsune to add to my stature, Chrysalis was still a lot taller than either of us, apparently. “I would much rather you have Blaze here to keep you anchored, rather than finding your body floating down the river, Ostri. Do not apologize for needing company when you clearly needed it. I just apologize for not being able to get to you quickly enough; Cadance talked me out of killing everypony that tracked you down.”
“It wouldn’t be a good idea, or legal, to kill off one of Equestria’s main lines of defense during a war.”
“Say guys,” I pointed at the newspaper. “Since Equestria’s spies, the changelings, are fucking stupid, they announced what cities are getting attacked in the public newspaper.”
“...Oh.” Chrysalis groaned. “I am going to have to teach Thorax not to do that. I thought he left the military and spywork to Pharynx…” She shook her head. “Luckily, I believe that the drones had enough sense to back the fuck out of the ships after they got what they needed.”
“Oh well,” I shrugged. I got up from the pile and did a stretch before tumbling right back in. “It’s a beautiful night to sleep under the stars. Hey Shiny, Cadance, wanna join?”
“Uh… isn’t this sorta thing-”
“Ostri asked if you wanted to cuddle, Shining Armor,” Blaze said with her eyes closed. “He likes both you and your wife. Just accept the offer and join us. Neither me or Chrysalis will mind…” She lifted her head. “Not here. Not fucking here.”
“Uh, Blaze, is something wrong?”
“...I believe the kumiho that was trying to court me, before I left Honshu a thousand years ago, has finally managed to track me down. I can feel him in the area, and I know he knows I’m here too.” Huh.
“So we’re fucked.” I grumbled as I stood up.
“We might be,” Blaze admitted.
I fucking hate life.
“Well, it’s been a good run,” I threw my hoof around a couple of times. “Who knows? He may not be all that bad.”
“Well… he was rather handsome last time I met him. I just wasn’t looking for a mate at the time so I didn’t take him up on his offer.” Blaze shrugged. “For a kumiho, I don’t think he was that violent, but we won’t know for sure… Let us go to the outskirts of town, Ostri; at least then he won’t target anyone in Baltimare besides us.”
“We are coming along,” Chrysalis said. “I’ve been fueled up with love, and between me, Cadance and Shining Armor, if this kumiho becomes violent, I doubt we would lose a fight with it.”