When it comes to Sonata Dusk, you never know what's about to pop in her head... but those closest to her knows something random and weird is expected. So when Sonata starts diving into some adult material, her desire to understand the meaning of the term 'fetish', Sonata finds herself drawn into her friend's wacky shenanigans. Will this be the learning experience she needs? Or is trouble just around the corner?
*Part of the Siren AU Continuity*
Edited by Dramamaster829 and ThePinkedWonder
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Chapters (1)
This was a fun story with good 'ol Dazzling shenanigans and Sonata being Sonata. Glad I was able to help with this.
I was a little nervous when I read the title and description, but you managed to pull this off pretty nicely. I thought a lot of the dialogue between the sisters was witty and snappy, and on the whole, the editing was much cleaner.
I think my only critique from a structural standpoint is opening the first scene from Sonata’s perspective, when we spend the rest of the scene largely from Aria’s. I know the story is about answering Sonata’s question, but most of the shenanigans come from the girls trying to figure out how to do that. So, it might have been better to just stay in Aria’s, at least for the duration of that scene.
Also, a couple of instances of our old friends the Unnecessarily Florid Color Spectra.
this made apple bloom cry
Anyway, not a bad job on the whole; keep at it. :D
Fun Fact: A fetish is also a different term for an inanimate object that has supernatural powers. An example of this definition of fetish is an amulet that can help you control people through singing.
10629542 ...I'm scared to ask but what did you expect the story to get into? Also, yea, I was trying to make it obvious she was in Luna's clothes. I went a bit to far into the description
When it comes to a fetish, we all have those desires. Whether it be towards a particular object or an item of clothing or maybe a part of one's body that just drives us crazy. Even the sirens themselves have their own cravings, some of which they're not just going to say aloud despite sharing a rather 'close' relationship. But leave it to Sonata's incurable sense of curiosity to try to understand human culture, as if either Adagio or Aria would have an even better understanding.
But there is no mistake faithful readers, as an additional segment of the 'Sirens' series, this is what we expect our fans to see. Crazy shenanigans, the humor, the bantering, all you can find in a short span of time. And we can guarantee in addition that each fan will have that one favorite takeaway from this story, it all the more depends on what said fans find the most memorable.
10629564
It's not entirely your fault about the color description. It's how it's written on her bio.
10629564 I’m just naturally wary of stories that proclaim “this is about fetishes! :D” in the titles and descriptions. They’re not always, uh, tastefully done, in my experience. But this was fine.
10629601 It’s a show-accurate description of the character’s hair color, yes, but from a writer’s perspective, it doesn’t add anything except extra syllables. Assume the reader knows what color* Celestia’s hair is, or just go whole-hog and start including hexadecimal codes, if you wanna be really faithful to the wiki.
*Or... colors, I guess.
10629665 Fair enough.
I was a little nervous when I read the headlines and explanations, but it worked. I thought most of the slow conversations were logical and effective, and the plan was generally clear.
From Sonta's point of view, I think this was just an infrastructure analysis, as I rejected the entire site, especially the Aria site. I know this story is the answer to Sonta's question, but the biggest problem is that girls are trying to find a way to do it. So at least it's great to be in Ariana for this event.
As for the worms, we all need them. Whatever it is, it is crazy about clothes or any part of our body. While mermaids have their needs, some are certainly not good despite the “sticky” connection. But notice Sonata's reluctance to try to understand human culture, as if Adagio or Arya were clever.
But our loyal readers have no problem - they are part of the 'Sirens' series, that's what our readers will see. Crazy conversation, jokes, jokes, all soon. Furthermore, we can say that each hunter takes his or her best interests in this regard, something that will never be forgotten.
Sincerely seth Standmore
please excuse my last comment I used my brothers speak to text app to write it
10630688 Sorry for the late reply. I'm glad you enjoyed the story. Also, I understand. I've done speech to text as well
My Little Reviews & Feedback I review this.
I liked this one, it reminds me of those 80's teen films in some small way.
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