Pony ballbusting artist and now also a writer. Living for the comments sake, so please leave a word!
Page generated in 0.089 seconds
Total duration
934 users online
491,783 hits today, 2,040,550 yesterday
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
Well this was a fun read between the two of them, I wonder his Shy will keep helping him in his training with that same approach.
9594678
Thanks! I wrote this as a prequel to the Twilight's Seven episode, so if there was a sequel to this it would most likely be about what happened after he failed at guarding the secret entrance.
Seems Fluttershy's assertiveness training has paid off!
Nice
The critique I left on your other entry applies almost exactly here.
The ball busting is at the forefront, incest is a distant background consideration. The writing is pretty good, the dialogue is good. The characterization of Shy felt a bit more lacking than your portrayals of Twi, Shining and Zeph, but I can look past it because I quite liked Zeph's characterization in this. He's simpering, lazy and pathetic; pretty much perfect.
Just a shame that as an incest fic it feels a bit lacking to me, and ultimately this is an entry in an incest-themed contest.
Still, worthy of an upvote at the very least. Thanks for writing it.
great story ^^
This was really good. I don't normally like incest stories, but you definitely made it work.