Rainbow Dash held her last bleakweed leaf in her little pony hooves and brought it to her little pony mouth so she could nibble on it with her little pony teeth. She did so with a considerable amount of precision and purpose, pivoting the whole of the morsel as she continued to bite into the thing.
Seraphimus was forced to stare at her the entire time. Her headcrest raised and lowered, and the griffin ultimately frowned. "What's this...?" she hissed. "In addition to a murderer, you're also a glutton?"
"Mrmmmfff... grnnghh-hnng..." Rainbow Dash waved a fetlock, swallowed, then continued nibbling at the leaf.
Seraphimus sighed. Her hawkeyes darted straight up.
Wildcard gazed back—but was silent. His gaze remained on Rainbow Dash.
At last—after a few little chompy-chomps with her molars—Rainbow Dash finished her "work." She swallowed the last few bites down, then placed the leaf down between the two of them. "Ahhh... urp... there we go..."
The leaf had been bitten to form a perfect curved line: consistently narrow like a quarter-circle.
"I would have drawn a line in the sand... but my hoof edges aren't as good as talons." Rainbow gestured at the bound guest. "I mean... you have talons, but we also don't have sand. Plus, you're kinda sorta in a homicidal rage at the present moment." She chuckled cheekily. "Heh heh heh heh..."
"... ... ..." Seraphimus glared.
"Aaaaaaaanyways..." Rainbow Dash shifted forward and pointed at the leaf. "Look at this leaf."
"No."
"So... pretend that this leaf... is the world that we live on." Rainbow's eyes occasionly darted between the partially-eaten meal she was gesturing at and the prisoner before her. "The land I'm from, Equestria, and the land you're from, Rohbredden, are both located on the curved portion of the plane." She pointed at the convex side of the bitten leaf. "This is the side where ponies, griffins, mules, squirrels, and all the rest love to live and play. The Sun and Moon both light this side—well—except for the very-very edge of it. That's the Twilight Lands and the seas where the midnighters loved to hang out."
Seraphimus merely stared.
"You..." Fluttershy squirmed, floating closer to Applejack. "Do you think any of this is getting through to her?"
"I dunno, darlin'." Applejack adjusted her hat, eyes locked on Seraphimus. "Reckon she's got her attention grabbed."
"So... you and me?" Rainbow managed a fuzzy smirk. "We've always lived on the bent outward side of the plane. But... there is also this side..."
Her blue hoof swam over to the concave side of the bitten leaf.
"This... is the Dark Side..." Rainbow's brow furrowed. "It's called that because there is no Sun. There is no Moon. There is only stars. This side of the world is a total mystery to most of the creatures who live on the Light Side... creatures like you and me."
"... ... ... ... ..." was all Seraphimus had to give.
"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand..." Rainbow Dash ran her hoof over the concave side again and again. "...it's a safe bet that whatever lives on the Dark Side of the world isn't very much attuned to Harmony. We're talking about Goddess-knows what kinds of monstrosities are allowed to live in a pitch-black place ruled only by chaos." She gulped, her eyes trailing off slightly. "Nasty... bone-chilling... life-stealing chaos..."
Seraphimus raised an eyecrest.
Rainbow cleared her throat, stifled her tremors, and looked solidly at Seraphimus again. "Well... turns out that there is one shining light on the Dark Side. One all-important beacon that was placed there longggggggggggg ago. I'm talking a gonzo amount of years ago. Like... friggin' eons atop of eons having a pancake slumber party of near-eternal proportions. There really is no way to picture the gargantuan amount of epochs shoveled into a furnace and churned around with—"
"Laying it on thick, Rainbow," Twilight droned.
"Like unwashed wool!" Rarity winced.
"Errr... you get the picture!" Rainbow circled the leaf with her hoof. "Big... bigggggg banana-shaped plane. Super old! And—just as old—there's a thing situated in the middle of the undercurve... here." She pointed at the middle of the concave portion. "Tucked away in some super ancient place called the 'Midnight Armory.' This amazing magical artifact is called the 'Harmonic Prism'. And while everything else about the Dark Side is evil, ugly, and chaotic—this thing... this artifact... this solid piece of peace-bringing Harmony is the answer to restoring life in all of its glory... or... more specifically... the life of this plane we all make ugly burpies on. Why is that important?"
Seraphimus' bored eyes met Rainbow's.
Rainbow's brow furrowed. "Because this plane is dying. It once belonged to a bigger and more awesome thing. A collection of curved planes. But—a long time ago and for some reason—this piece of the bigger thing got... broken off. Sundered. And now it's... like... a smaller thing. And it's energy is waning... and so is all the stuff living on it. And... like... the powers of Harmony—the same powers that give us the Sun and Moon and the Harmonic Prism—can only sustain life for so long. Even that has to run out... unless someone... somepony... gets the Harmonic Prism, brings it back to the bent outward part... and gives the entire plane a snazzy, cosmic reboot."
Rainbow Dash leaned back. She took a deep breath.
"I only found out about this about two years ago... and even then I only knew so much. I've been discovering little bits of truth along the way. Along what way? Well—to make a long story short—I've been flying eastward from my home kingdom every month and week and day and night so that I may one day cross over onto the Dark Side so that I might then fetch this Harmonic Prism from the Midnight Armory and do something to stop the world from going permanently kaputzy."
Seraphimus was silent.
Rainbow arched an eyebrow. "Nothing. Not even a spittake or—"
"That entire story is asinine," Seraphimus grunted. Her beak clapped: "You're asinine."
Fluttershy and Pinkie winced.
"Mrmmmmmmm..." Rainbow face-hoofed hard. "Wrong... A-Word..."
Aaaaaaaand swing and a miss.
Sooo...when you gonna prop her upright so she can see the big ol' fuckin' curvature of this place for herself, eh?
Asinine: Extremely stupid or foolish.
Well Dash, can't say you didn't try.
Also you got immensely more eloquent on this journey.
-Through the path long forgotten, into the darkness long begotten. Ofolrodi.
Of course she doesn't listen, Rainbow needs to get her to doubt what she did previously if she wants her to come around.
Leave it to Dash to explain shit in such a way that it both intrigues you and makes you laugh!
Oh, and the murderbird isn't getting it. Really not surprised at that
Anyone getting tempted to bonk Seraph with a pan?
To be honest I really don't see how that was supposed to make her care. She has nothing to live for she wants to die and kill Rainbow Dash. If she wants that why in the world would she care about the planet dying? Her wanting to take down Dash is simply for petty revenge she doesn't actually care about her homeland or saving anyone.
8263006
Still waiting on a solid birdie bitchslap.
Well Sera herself may have not enjoyed the presentation, but somehow her back was applauding so I'm gonna take that as a good sign!
Reminds me of every time I try to explain various Sci Fi or Fantasy settings.
You know, Dash, you could just have Ariel and Wildcard help you lift Seraphimus up a ways and show her the Dark Side.
At least then, asinine story or not, she couldn't deny that the Dark Side is real.
Tis been far too long.
I think Imre called her asinine last...
8263021
Defying reality is the first step in becoming an austraeoh protagonist.
8263042
Sera is an Antagonist.
Becoming a protagonist means you learn to run on rule of cool.
holding my smartphone in the crook of two hooves, I eagerly lipped my way to the next page of this story
I'm surprised she didn't say bullshit after every few sentences.
She'll eventually have to realize that the sun never rises and they're clearly not anywhere in the Twilight Lands...
That Persuasion check though...
It could have went way worse but at least she wasn't screaming throughout the whole um...history lesson?
8263078
Dashie's charismatic, but this catbird has a hard head. +20 requirement to all rolls for success.
Hey, Asinine is a step up from Heretic.
Seriously though, Seraphimus at this point is bound to either end up a begrudging ally or a doubting enemy in the future.
Maybe a run-in with a truer and greater evil will convince her that Rainbow really isn't that bad...
I'm with 8262991. Someone tilt her sled up so she can see for herself. That may at least get a foot in the epistemological doorway.
8263094
And unfortunately for her charisma rolls, Dash is a Rogue, not a Bard.
Aaaaaand now I'm sad again
Well then, that went as well as expected...
Good (and funny) laypony explanation there, Dash. Unfortunately, we need a laygriffin explanation for this one.
also
Haven't heard this for a while.
Yes!
I'm so happy to hear that again.
😊
8263041
Right now I'd say Seraphim is being asinine. Or just being stubborn and refusing to see anything outside her worldview.
8263055
I feel like she already does(in that she wound up with warhammer 40k levels of untouchability in the fight with the sarosians). The ability to use stupid plans to one's advantage is when one becomes a member of the ju-herald, yes that.
Like I said, she should have used a song. Good job with the visual aids though.
8263055
Seraphimus is denying reality.
Rainbow Dash is constantly defying reality.
Murder-Turkey's using the wrong D word.
Using truth to convince zealots is a noble attempt, but it usually won't work that easily.
The best way I see is to illustrate to Seraphimus how her righteous crusade to fight Rainbow Dash would cause a righteous apocalypse on the light side, leading to the righteous death of every innocent creature, including the righteous population of Rohbredden.
Problem is, Seraphimus has to figure out this paradox on her own, because Rainbow's credibility was trashed after her stunt in the council.
8263396
That's why she needs to see the curvature of the plane as said by robored.
I'm getting Ponies Are The Size Of Cats flashbacks from this.
8263399
True, it's a good first step in the right direction.
I mean, in fairness, if you told anyone else the world was shaped like a banana, "asinine" might be the most positive reaction.
Good try Rainbow. A little too much to hope Sera would be onboard for right now. Now all we gotta do is wait and prepare for the ambush.
Well, hey, at least she didn't start screaming again. I'll take that.
I highly doubt you're going to get the right A-word from Sera, Dashie. "Asshole," maybe, but not the right A-word.
Fifty jumping jacks, ):(. Knock 'em out!
Not too bad for trying to be a Guide, there Dash, but Im pretty sure that Sera would love to carry out The Parrot Sketch, on her audience.
Would having her green photo album helped as a visual aid?
8263246 Just because she refuses to forgo her previous worldview for one made somewhat plausible by her current surroundings? Average, normal, everyday humans are quite capable of turning even pure, basic logic utterly impotent for the sake of preserving that.
Actually, this chapter - and peoples' reactions to it - reminds me of an often-quoted story of a psychologist who some decades ago found herself hearing voices. When asked by a colleague what she would say to a patient reporting such symptoms she answered "Oh, severe shizophrenia, no question. But these voices are different. These voices are real." Remember also a case that came up in the Jury a while ago, of a believer reporting a heavenly revelation of God that could not have been a mere hallucination because God was involved and God is infallible - which of course is as fallacious as logic gets.
And now Seraphimus has been a stern believer all her life and she has a personal vendetta upon which much of her remaining mental stability and drive rest - she will be subconsciously existentially frightened by the thought of Rainbow's story being true, as it would bereave her life of all meaning and drive, forwards and backwards. Realistically speaking Rainbow could provide her with absolutely indisputable evidence of her case, empirical and logical, to the point where any outsider would find it utterly infeasible how anyone could ever believe anything else - and not move Seraphimus in the slightest.
This little speech she just gave her was a thimble of water to a forest fire.
8263073
You won't get through to her that easily. It'll probably take until the armory to convince her.
That's strike one Dashie. You only have two goes left before the death parrot turns into a death birb. You don't want the death birb.
Well she's not screeching anymore... That's progress right?
8263904
And Dashie didn't even have to give her a cracker.
8263479
This is an ex-Seraph!
I'm beginning to think RD is never going to get some sleep. Rainbow, please, the entire mission depends on you, please save the history lesson for after a long nap, kay?
And now the wedge is showing signs of splintering...
If Sera isn't a believer now, then the moment that anyone calls her Austraeoh on this side of the plane will make her one. It is only a matter of time.
I wonder: throughout this series, how many times has Rainbow's journey - or the story of Urohringr - been told? It's kind of crazy how it remains interesting with each retelling.