Discord's New Business
Second Visit: Rarity
by Jonathan 'KnightMysterio' Spires
All characters copyrighted to their original owners and used for non-profit amusement purposes. Please support me on patreon if you like my work!
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Ponyville...
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Rainbow Dash zipped up to Discord as he was packing up his stand. “Hey!” she said. “I'm ready to get transformed.”
“I'm closed for the evening,” Discord said, not turning to look at her.
“Aw, c'mon!” Rainbow Dash protested, annoyed. “You do transformations just by snapping your wiggly hoof thingies!”
“They're called 'fingers,'” Discord said, amused.
“WHATEVER!” Rainbow Dash said. “I just wanna be changed into something cool!”
Discord stroked his beard thoughtfully after he finished folding up his stand into a briefcase. “...All right then,” he said. “What would you like to be?”
“I dunno,” Rainbow Dash said. “Something totally awesome!”
“That's not helpful,” Discord said. “You and I have completely different ideas of what awesome is!”
“And that's cool!” Rainbow Dash said. “I completely respect that! Which is why I trust you to change me into something that totally ROCKS!”
Discord grinned evilly. “Ooooh, that's a dangerous thing to say to me in a situation like this,” he said. “You truly trust me?”
Rainbow Dash nodded.
Discord smirked. “Well, I suppose I could turn you into a zombie, which would leave you a mindless, shuffling mass of rotting meat in constant pain. Or I could turn you into a Smooze! That would leave you barely sapient and incapable of speech. Also, my buddy the green Smooze would probably want to merge with you. I could turn you into a Stay Puft Marshmallow Mare, but then you'd be completely edible. And kids LOVE marshmallows. Perhaps I could turn you into a zoomfish, the fastest fish in the seas, but the seaponies find them incredibly delicious. I could turn you into a ghoul, but then you'd have a constant hunger for the flesh of other ponies. Then there's...”
“Um...” Rainbow Dash said, having gone visibly pale from Discord's suggestions. “Perhaps, something twenty percent cooler? And less abomination-y?”
“...Honestly surprised you know that word,” Discord said, grinning when Rainbow Dash made a grumpy noise. “Let's see... Twenty percent cooler... I know! I could turn you into a shoggoth!”
“...That does sound cool,” Rainbow Dash said. “What is it?”
“A cosmic abomination that drives anyone who looks at it insane!” Discord chirped.
“OH COME ON!!” Rainbow Dash said, frustrated. “Work with me here!”
“No, you work with me!” Discord said, visibly annoyed. “Do you have any idea how FRUSTRATING it is for a vendor to get a vague order like that?”
“I don't understand,” Rainbow Dash said after a moment.
“Not everyone has the same taste as you do, Rainbow Dash!” Discord said. “You think Daring Do is cool? I have beheld horrifically dangerous creatures that would turn Miss Do into a smear! Seen sights so wondrous, so beautiful, that Daring Do would simply DIE from the sheer glory of them!” He shook his head. “Everypony's different, Rainbow Dash. Everypony likes different things. It's especially hard if they don't KNOW YOU. You want awesome? I guarantee you that one hundred ponies out of one hundred will have a completely different idea of what awesome is from you. Twenty percent cooler doesn't help. How do you measure coolness? How do you measure awesomeness? Is there a scientific method to it? Can they be taught in a class?”
“I...” Rainbow Dash stammered. If it had been anyone else, the lecture would have flown over her head as boring. But Discord, his pupils reduced to glowing red slits, was scaring her right now, forcing her to pay attention.
“Just saying 'awesome' means nothing to me,” Discord said, putting on Rarity's hat. “You need to be specific, or I swear to Chaos Itself the next time you come to me with vague wishes like that I will turn you into a parasprite for a week. PICK SOMETHING. Or never bother me with it again!”
He snapped his fingers, teleporting away.
Rainbow Dash just stared at the spot Discord used to be. And in a rare moment of thoughtfulness, she flew off to think.
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
The next day...
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“You're back already?” Discord said, surprised.
“Indeed,” Rarity said. “Freshly showered after my experience, and honestly ready for more.”
“Enjoyed being a Diamond Dog, eh?” Discord said, leaning over his stand.
Rarity giggled. “Oh, it was delightful. So many new sensations. And who knew digging could be so much fun? Transforming yourself is so exhilarating!”
Discord grinned. “I always love hearing about ponies enjoying new experiences,” he said. “Now, what will it be this time?”
Rarity smiled. “I think I will be a dragon this time,” she said.
Discord blinked. “Really? I thought you said yesterday...”
“Spike and I talked,” Rarity interrupted. “And he's fine with it. And truthfully, I am curious.”
Discord chuckled. “Very well. And shall I assume that you'll want to stay a dragon as long as Spike stays a pony?”
Rarity nodded. “Certainly, darling,” she said. “I'm prepared to pay for the extra days.”
“In the spirit of generosity and the fact that Pinkiecorn's party the other day has me in a tremendously good mood, I'm willing to waive the fee,” Discord said, pulling out a paper and pushing it forward, making a quill manifest out of thin air. “Sign here, please.”
Rarity blinked, looking at the paper. “What's this?”
“Standard issue 'Not my fault if things go wrong form.' Dragon's a high end transformation and to legally cover my ever-shifting booty...” Discord said.
“Thank you, Discord, now I'm going to have the image of a shapeshifting butt in my head all day,” Rarity snarked.
Discord snorted laughter. “Sign the thing. It's for legal purposes.”
“Fair enough, I suppose,” Rarity said. “I remember you telling us about these now.” She picked up the form with her magic, and used the quill to sign it. “There we are.”
Discord snapped his fingers. In a flash of light, Rarity started to change. Her fur hardened, becoming diamond-hard scales, her body lengthening as her hooves became powerful, gripping claws. Her purple, curly tail became a long, whip-like appendage with a diamond-shaped spike at the end. Wings sprouted from her back, as a line of purple spikes went up her tail and spine, cresting and curling over her head in the form her mane used to be. Her muzzle extended, filling with fangs.
“I... oh, this feels weird...” Rarity said, looking herself over. She had become taller as well, a little taller than Dragon Lord Ember. “But it also feels REALLY good!” She flexed, grinning.
Discord chuckled. “Yes, I do suppose gaining firebreath, wings, near invincibility, and extra muscle would feel good, now wouldn't it?” He made himself more muscular, flexing and grunting.
Rarity giggled. “Well, I do thank you, darling,” she said. “This should be an interesting week.” She strode off, walking easily through town.
Well, this is most exciting! she thought. I wonder how Spikey-wikey will react when he sees me? She walked easily through the town, watching everypony as they trotted. She waved to the ponies who recognized her, chatting amiably with them.
Applejack was walking around the corner, thinking about Iron Will's offer, when she noticed Rarity, dropping the bushel of apples she was carrying. “Whoa there...”
“Applejack, darling!” Rarity said. “How are you today?”
“Um...” Applejack said. “Just fine. Wow, you're big...”
Rarity giggled. “I suppose Discord made me the size to match my age as a dragon,” she said. “Really, I think I look rather fabulous, don't you?” She smiled toothily, posing and spreading her impressive wingspan.
Applejack meeped. Being this close to an adult dragon, even if it was her friend, was unsettling. “Um... sure thing, Rarity.”
Rarity helped Applejack pick up her apples. “There you are,” she said.
Applejack nodded. “So... what's your plans for the day?”
Rarity giggled. “Well, I'm going to try out my wings, of course. Maybe take Spike flying with me,” she said. “And of course, I've always wondered what gems taste like, after seeing Spike eat them so many times.”
Applejack nodded. “That's fair,” she said. “See you later, then?”
Rarity nodded. “Certainly,” she said. “Have a good day, Applejack.”
“You too, Rares,” Applejack said, shaking her head. “Yeesh. Two transformations... maybe I should turn minotaur again. That Iron Will feller's a reasonable sort...”
Rarity watched Applejack go, finding her gaze drawn to Applejack's muscular flanks. So firm, so tight... and her hind legs were so deliciously muscular...
Rarity shook her head. “Goodness,” she said. “I don't know WHAT is coming over me.”
She started off again, heading out to look for Spike again. She truly did want him to see her like this, all sleek and elegant.
Speaking of sleek, dat Big Macintosh flank... Rarity watched as Big Macintosh hauled a large cart full of spun hay through the town. His muscular legs pumped easily, hauling that heavy cart as if it were nothing. Powerful muscles, a toned flank... and such a gentleman, too. Quiet, thoughtful, intelligent...
Rarity shook her head. “Stop it,” she said to herself. “You are a lady. You don't have a wandering eye-yai-yai...”
Zecora was walking through town, buying ingredients for her potions. She moved with an ease and grace that always fascinated Rarity. And there was always such an exotic air about her. Not just because she was the only zebra in town, but because she always held an air of mystery. She fascinated Rarity at times...
Rarity shook her head, trying to clear it. “No. I will not stare at the pretties like I was some lonely construction worker,” she said, strutting off, holding her head high.
She got about five steps before something else caught her attention.
Filthy Rich and Spoiled Rich were arguing again. The two had been doing that a lot since Diamond Tiara had learned how to stand up to Spoiled. Filthy was supportive of her daughter's new, kinder personality, while Spoiled was against it, thinking that Diamond was making herself weak. As for this argument, Spoiled seemed to give up quickly, walking off in a huff. Filthy shook his head sadly and went about his business.
Rarity's long, powerful tail flicked back and forth as she considered Filthy. He was a bit older than she usually liked, but he was handsome. Obviously good with kids, since Diamond Tiara clearly adored him. And he definitely had the patience of a god if he stayed with Spoiled this long...
Rarity shook her head. “What in the WORLD is the matter with me?” she said, thinking out loud. “I keep thinking of all these lovely ponies as pretty pretty treasures...”
“I suppose it does have a rustic sort of charm,” said a voice Rarity knew. “But still, I don't know what you see in it.”
“No...” Rarity said in dismay, going over to the source of the voice.
Sure enough, Prince Blueblood was there. And with him was Fancy Pants, the two on a walking tour of Ponyville.
Fancy Pants smiled. “It's not so much the area as it is the ponies, my friend,” he said. “Look around. Everypony here just feels more 'real' than they do in Canterlot. More honest, and less superficial. You'd have to go to the lower districts to get that in Canterlot but here? Everypony we've met has wished us a good day and MEANT IT.”
“Hm... Well, you're not wrong about Canterlot elite superficiality,” Blueblood conceded. “And certainly the common carnival fare at that apple stand is far better than I expected it to be...”
So handsome... Rarity thought dreamily. Both of them were well built hunks. Blueblood trained with the guards on weekend as sport, and Fancy Pants was a skilled fencer. Their white coats were immaculate, they dressed well... Blueblood was arrogant, but he was also as loyal as Rainbow Dash. And Fancy Pants... goodness, he was almost everything she could want in a stallion. She envied Fleur, his confidant, so much at times...
“Such pretty, pretty treasures...” Rarity said, licking her muzzle lustfully. “Perfect for my hoard...” She had to have them. And not just them. There were so many pretty, wonderful stallions and mares out there.
She would have them all. “Mine...”
“Um, Rarity?” Bulk Biceps said, tugging on her tail. “You've kinda grown...”
Rarity looked down... and blinked. She really had grown larger, tall enough to be able to look over the tops of the houses in town. “So I have,” she said. She looked at Bulk again, a slow smile spreading over her face. So much muscle... and a fine masseuse...
Bulk blinked. “Should I run?”
“A bit too late for that, darling,” she said, reaching a taloned hand down for him.
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Meanwhile...
Twilight's Palace...
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Four royals were having tea. Celestia, Luna, and Twilight were meeting with Dragon Lord Ember, the blue dragoness having come over that morning to visit.
“This is good,” Ember said. “I always thought tea was sort of a sissy drink before.”
Celestia smiled. “It's all in the blends,” she said. “I'm glad things are going well in the Dragonlands.”
Ember grinned. “Yeah. Dragons are actually pretty easy to govern, since most of us keep to ourselves. It's why I had the free time to come visit.”
Spike, who was serving the four of them, grinned. “It's good to have you here, Ember,” he said, giving her a small bowl of gems. “From my private stock.”
“Thanks,” Ember said, shaking her head at the dragon-turned-unicorn. “Eesh... Transformations... Dunno if I could do it.”
“Discord's been behaving himself... mostly...” Luna said. “And aside from the fiasco with Starlight turning herself into a Chrysalis-type Changeling Queen, nothing too severe has happened.”
Ember nodded. “Which brings me to some questions I had...”
Twilight nodded. “Ask away,” she said. “Your insights on how to give Spike a hoard without him going through Greedgrowth Insanity were invaluable.”
Ember nodded slowly. “It's the fact that you have so many villains as friends now. I asked around earlier... That stage magician that lives on the outskirts of the village, Trixie, she took over the town, once?”
Twilight nodded. “If you're thinking she's not being punished, she is. She has a guard shadowing her at all times. As she's just arrogant, she's been judged relatively harmless. Every magical curio shop in Equestria has been informed of her, however.”
“Hnh... I suppose that makes sense. But there's still the matter of Discord, the changelings, and Starlight herself. Changelings were a problem even for the dragons, for one thing. They could only impersonate dragons as young as me, but still.”
“We've since discovered that Chrysalis was keeping her entire hive half-starved and emaciated. The hunger, which never truly went away in their old forms by all accounts, drove them to aggression. The changelings, as they stand now, are self-sustaining and all much more stable in personality,” Celestia said.
“And it helps that no one was really hurt by them beyond being stuffed in cocoons,” Luna said. “Apparently they operated on a catch and release system so as to avoid suspicion. From what the current King, Thorax, has told us, Chrysalis was dangerously insane from her constant starvation and grew ambitious.”
“We were lucky...” Twilight said softly. “If there were deaths during the raid on Canterlot, or more serious injuries, then integrating the changelings into society would be much harder...”
Ember looked thoughtful, munching on some gems. “I can accept that, I suppose,” she said. “What about the other two? The older dragons still fear Discord's name, and I've heard a lot about what Starlight did...”
“Starlight's... complicated...” Twilight said. “Her reason for starting her cult seemed petty at first, but I looked into it. Her home life was... it wasn't pleasant. Her father wasn't the kind type, let's say.”
Luna frowned. “A child abuser?” she said angrily.
“He's long since been punished for his crime, although his actions did contribute to Starlight's neurosis,” Twilight said. “As for Starlight herself...” She sighed. “She was able to match me, an alicorn and the Element of Magic, in direct combat and is absolutely brilliant at spell innovation. I don't think there's a cell in Equestria that could hold her for long. Rehabilitating her and getting her on our side was the safest option.”
Celestia nodded in agreement. “In addition, Discord's a force of nature. He cannot be killed. Imprisoning him away would always be temporary, and his escapes always result in him lashing out. The best thing I can say about him in the bad old days is that he never took a life...”
Luna sipped her tea. “We concede it was dangerous, Lord Ember,” she said. “But again, the long-term benefits of befriending him, teaching him the value of friendship and harmony, far outweigh the temporary reprieve imprisoning him would give.”
“Better to worry about a friendly prank than reality turning sideways on us,” Celestia added. “I've spent centuries teaching Equestria to be a forgiving, loving place for all. It would be hypocritical not to give a chance to those willing to try and change.”
Ember frowned, thoughtful. And then she sat back in her chair, sighing. “Yeah, I guess that makes sense... Sorry to bring up politics in what's supposed to be a friendly visit.”
Celestia smiled. “You are a ruler, and you are concerned for your subjects. Your concerns are valid,” she said. “I hope we've assuaged them.”
Ember nodded. “I still have doubts, but what you've said makes sense,” she said. “I'll have to trust it for now.”
The three alicorns smiled happily.
Spike was glad the meeting was going well. He liked Ember, and was glad to see that she was still making friends. He went to the kitchens, to get some more snacks... and paused, hearing something outside. He went to look, heading for a window... and then immediately ran back to the map room where the Princesses and Dragon Lord were chatting.
“TWILIGHT! WE GOT A PROBLEM!” he shouted. The four royals turned, but before they cold react, a massive, white-scaled fist punched through the side of the castle, grabbing Spike and yanking him out.
“MINE!” shrieked a voice.
“...That sounded like Rarity,” Twilight said. Celestia, Luna, Twilight, and Ember ran for the hole in the side of the castle, spotting Spike being carted off by a graceful white dragoness with purple spines, one of them curling elegantly on her head like a forelock.
“Looks like Rarity went for a second transformation,” Twilight said, worried.
“That's definitely Greedgrowth Insanity,” Ember said, growling. “We need to stop her.”
Rainbow Dash zipped up to the castle, Thunderlane, Flitter, and Cloudchaser with her. “We can't stop her, Princess Twilight!” Thunderlane said. “She's been grabbing ponies left and right!”
“She's been heading to the cave we drove that dragon out of a couple years ago,” Rainbow Dash said, pointing in the direction Rarity was flying. “We can't get close without her attacking us. Should I go get the Wonderbolts?”
Celestia shook her head. “No need for them to put themselves at risk,” she said. “We'll try talking her down first.”
“Indeed!” Luna said. “And with three alicorns here, as well as noble Ember, we should be more than enough to subdue her should she go out of control! HUZZAH!” With that battle cry, she flew off, heading for Rarity. Ember flew after her. Celestia and Twilight traded worried looks, and followed the two of them.
They arrived shortly after at the cave Rarity mentioned. She slithered inside.
“Ember. Will we be able to talk her down?” Twilight asked. “When Spike went into Greedgrowth, he was able to come out of it thanks to Rarity...”
“I still have a hard time believing that happened...” Ember muttered. “But considering she already HAS Spike... What about a relative?”
Twilight shook her head. “She's not on the best terms with her parents, and I refuse to put her sister in danger while Rarity's still this demented,” she said.
“I concur,” Celestia said. “Any other suggestions?”
Ember took a deep breath. “Just one – age me up,” she said.
The three alicorns stared at her, confused. Ember nodded. “Age me up. Temporarily turn me into an adult dragoness. The only way I know of to cure someone of Greedgrowth Insanity is the beat the crap out of them until they come to their senses.”
Celestia, Luna, and Twilight traded worried looks. “I don't want Rarity hurt...” Twilight said softly.
“We may not have a choice, Twilight Sparkle,” Luna said, Celestia nodding in agreement.
Twilight sighed, knowing they were right, “Okay, just... go easy on her.”
The three alicorns turned their magic on Ember. She flinched, and then ROARED as she felt strength and power filling her. Her horns grew longer as her body lengthened, her wingspan growing even more impressive as her spines became larger.
“Whoah...” Ember said, chuckling. “What a rush...” She looked at her much larger body and flexed, the muscles in her arms bulging. “Niiice...”
Rarity came out of the cave, cooing. “Now you darlings be good to one another, and mama will be back shortly with food,” she said, smiling happily at her captives. She turned, and noticed Ember immediately.
“Oh my... Dragon Lord Ember?” she said.
“That's right,” Ember said. “I need you to stand down, pony, and release your captives.”
Rarity twitched, growling. “You... you want to take my hoard! Take my TREASURES! I won't let you take them! I WON'T! In fact...” She looked Ember ever, a grin coming to her face. “I'll add YOU to my hoard! The Lord of All Dragons will be the CROWN JEWEL in my collection! RRRAGGH!” She lunged, tackling Ember and knocking her over, the alicorns quickly getting out of the way as the two dragons fought.
Roaring, Rarity blasted a gout of flame into Ember's face. Ember winced, the flames sizzling against her scales, and flipped Rarity off of her. Before the alabaster dragoness could recover, Ember slammed her tail down against Rarity's head.
The unicorn-turned-dragoness grunted in pain, rolling to her feet and snarling, slashing at Ember with her claws. But as fiercely as Rarity fought, the difference in skill between the two was greater.
Rarity was operating on pure savagery, slashing and breathing fireballs (stray shots quickly being put out by the princesses so as not to damage the nearby forest any more than it already was). But Ember had been a dragon all her life. She knew how to manage the roughhousing that was normal for youngsters of her kind. And she knew how to win.
When Rarity lunged again, Ember sidestepped, brushing a tree across Rarity's face and blinding her. When she staggered forward, Ember breathed a massive gout of flame at her back, right in between her wings, hitting her in a sensitive area.
Rarity yelped, staggering and falling forward. Ember was on top of her quickly, grabbing Rarity by the head and slamming her face into the ground over and over.
“MINE!” Rarity roared.
“They aren't treasures, they're living beings!” Ember roared back.
“MIIIINE! My pretties!” Rarity bellowed.
“YOU WILL LET THEM GO, PONY! I am Ember, Lord of All Dragons, including you!” Ember roared, slamming Rarity's face into the dirt with each of her next words. “AND YOU! WILL! OBEY!”
The last hit was enough. Rarity, dazed and groaning, her snout bleeding, shrunk back down. “Whut... oh... oh dear...” she said as she recovered her senses. “I've made a terrible mistake.”
The alicorns landed near her. “Are you all right, Rarity?” Twilight asked, hugging her.
“I am, darling,” Rarity said, hugging back gratefully. “But I fear I've made several critical errors...”
“Where are thy kidnapping victims, Lady Rarity?” Luna asked.
“In the far end of the cave,” Rarity said. “I'll take you to them.” She flew up, and kissed Ember on the snout. The larger dragoness blushed. “Thank you, Ember, for helping me.”
“S-Sure, no problem,” Ember said, blushing.
The group went inside. The princesses were expecting the worst...
...only to find everyone Rarity had kidnapped relaxing inside a makeshift hot tub, steaming water filling a large, dug out hole. Fancy Pants was chatting with Big Macintosh and Applejack, while Filthy Rich was talking animatedly with Zecora in her native language. The zebra was clearly pleased to hear her native tongue. Trixie was on one end of the tub, showing off for a changeling. Spike, who had gotten out of the tub, looked up, took one look at Rarity and the aged up Ember, and fainted with a blush on his face, muttering “So pretty...” And as for Blueblood.
“Ah! Auntie Celestia!” Blueblood said merrily. He was laying on the side of the tub, Bulk Biceps giving him a massage. “Come and join us! The water is EXCELLENT! And this young stallion is fantastic with his hooves!”
“Yeah!” Bulk Biceps said, beaming happily at the praise.
“You... You're all safe?” Celestia said, relieved but very confused.
Rarity twiddled her talons nervously. “I've come out here a few times on my own after that dragon moved out, collecting bits of his hoard that he left behind. I found a natural hot spring deep within the cave. In my... ah... collecting spree, I wanted to make my 'collection' as comfortable as possible.”
Filthy smiled. “While we could have done without the kidnapping, none of us are hurt,” he said, gesturing to Zecora. “I just brokered a deal with this fine young mare to promote her potions in my store.”
“And I was just educating the two Apple siblings here on the finer points of business, on how they can expand the Sweet Apple Acres brand,” Fancy Pants aid.
Applejack grinned. “This Fancy feller's got his head on straight,” she said. “I see why y'like him so much!”
“Eeyup,” Big Macintosh added helpfully.
“Trixie was a little startled at first, but Trixie thinks she made a new friend out of it,” she said, happily hugging the changeling, who beamed at he praise.
“I'm gonna be her assistant in her shows!” she said.
“So... none of you are angry? None of you are pressing charges?”
“Certainly not,” Blueblood said. “I want to DEVELOP this cave! Turn it into a full spa! Maybe get those two lovely twins in town to run it. Do you know how much of a tourist attraction a natural hot spring spa is? Especially if it used to be a dragon cave? Hire some changelings to pretend to be dragons themselves, and you've got a real business opportunity here!”
Twilight looked thoughtful. “It would help tourism... Especially since they'd have to go through Ponyville to get there...”
Ember looked amused. “So none of you are mad at her?”
“Nah,” Applejack said. “It all turned out all right, didn't it?”
“I suppose so...” Ember said, grinning. “I gotta know, though. What was your criteria for capturing everyone?”
Rarity blushed. “Well... Um... I went for... ponies and persons that I was attracted to physically...”
That got a blush out of the still conscious patrons of the impromptu spa.
“R-Really?” Ember said, blushing, suddenly looking shy. “Me? Attractive? No one's ever called me attractive before...”
“Um... Rarity? It's not that I don't appreciate the thought, but I'm straight as an arrow,” Applejack said.
“Yes, I do apologize everyone,” Rarity said. “I will try to make it up to you somehow.”
Blueblood grinned. “On the contrary. I have to thank you for showing me this delightful discovery!” Bulk Biceps finished his massage, Blueblood standing up. “Oooh, I feel good, thank you good sir...”
Wow, I really Hoofdini'd my way out of this mess, Rarity thought, smiling as Luna decided to join the others in the hot tub.
Twilight sighed in relief. “I guess all's well that ends well...” she said, going to revive Spike.
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Later...
In town...
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
“I suppose you're pleased with yourself,” Celestia said to Discord.
“TOTALLY!” Discord crowed. “I was worried that she'd just indulge in some schmaltzy romance stuff, but this is MUCH better!”
“Ponies could have gotten hurt, Discord,” Celestia said, frowning. “And there's a hole in the side of Twilight's castle.”
Discord scoffed, snapping his fingers. The hole was repaired. “And now there isn't a hole. And nopony got hurt, either.” Grinning wickedly, he held up the waiver Rarity signed. “And even if there was, you can't go after me for it. She signed the waiver.”
Celestia glared at Discord a long moment and sighed. “Forgive me,” she said. “I'm just...”
“You're worried,” Discord said softly. “I understand. I haven't really made much of a good reputation for myself, I know that. But I truly mean no harm in this, Celestia.”
Celestia looked up, seeing the warm smile on Discord's face. She couldn't help it, she smiled back. “Well...” She thought for a moment, and sighed, realizing she had nothing to say. “I suppose I'll be going.”
“Celestia,” Discord said. “You and Luna have freebies as well now.”
Celestia blinked.
Discord grinned. “Call it a peace offering,” he said.
Celestia looked thoughtful, and smiled back. “We'll see,” she said, flying off.
TO BE CONTINUED...
Next time: Rainbow Dash actually picks something!
Talon and paw, really.
He's right, you know.
Reformed or not, an angry reality warper is NOT to be trifled with.
He has a point.
I'd imagine, yeah.
Agreed.
You're making him feel like a human about to be gobbled up by a Titan.
Excellent case.
I think the thing is, he did it because it wouldn't be fun. Once a pony's dead, that's it. Just a body to play with, no soul or intelligence. He'd basically be breaking a toy.
Agreed.
Of course. Ember's been a dragon all her life, Rarity has not.
He has a point.
I can think of various fanfics that disagree.
Fair enough.
So you had a giant Kaiju fight?! And Discord had almost nothing to do with it?! I commend you, good sir!
Magnificent insanity, this. And leave it to Rarity to make her kidnapping victims' comfort her top priority. Thank you for the bonus chapter.
You needed to check you poll again because we have almost got another problem again?!?
Rainbow Dash the griffin is way too good a chance to pass up. RD gets to find out what it's like in Gilda's talons. What instincts griffins have that ponies don't and vice versa.
I want to see Iron Will transform into an earthpony for a date with AppleJack
I had a feeling you'd find a way to make the dragon transformation canon.
Oh Rarity, I'm sure Spike wouldn't mind you having a harem...
derpicdn.net/img/view/2016/9/27/1259505.png
...as long as he gets to choose half of the members...
OK, all caught up. *yeay*
And thus, Maude got a new friend!
Honestly i'm torn on RBD. On one hand, err hoof, i'm thinking a Griffon due to her connection with Gilda and i don't really see her as being a non flyer, on the other i can also see her going Earth Pony simply to find out what makes Pinkie and Aj so cool to her.
Super Speedy Seapony RD!
Great chapter! Think I liked it even better than the first go for Rarity.
One correction:
who beamed at he praise.
Honestly I think you're so caught up in the big changes that you're ignoring the obvious. Gender, size, fitness, and age should all be viable options, and I feel like they each present story opportunities. Rainbow could age herself down to spend a day playing with Scootaloo on her level, Luna could decide she wanted to see what it was like to be male, Twilight could decide she wanted to feel what it felt like to be as tall as Celestia, etc. Though maybe those kinds of options would work better as mini-chapters or things you mention happening on the side. Have a cut of Rainbow and Scootaloo being ridiculous children, have someone go to visit Twilight and she's suspiciously sunbutt shaped, etc.
Loved this update chapter. Rarity really embraced her dragoness nature. Well done.
I think Spike 's regret was that he wasn't the one taken alone by her.
8118580 The purpose of the story, I'm afraid, is the big transformations, as I feel they are more Discord's style. (Seriously, the big guy's about as subtle as Michael Bay's Optimus Prime playing heavy metal.) However once the story is completed (the very last chapter will be Twilight Sparkle), I may continue with the story ideas you suggested, as I do think they could work. Although they will be in separate stories, they will be set in the same canon.
Mostly, this story is about me trying to get back into a regular writing groove. After losing my family, my will to write just went out the window. It's also cost me a few of my patrons on Patreon. (I really need to redo my page...)
That being said, I want to thank you and everyone else for supporting the story for this long. It's really encouraging to me as a writer to have this much interest in it.
Hope this goes on for a good while. This is funny as hell to read.
I think I preferred Rarity's first chapter, but this was a fun one still.
"So why'd you blow up Sombra?" she finally asked.
"Oh, he was a dick," Celestia smirked.
"Totally," agreed Luna.
Ember blinked and shrugged, "Eh, whatever."
And so they had their tea and never spoke of Sombreromort again.
And Rainbow Dash decides to become a rainbow.
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“Has your sister's fur grown back yet?” Discord asked.
Rarity snickered. “Yes. And she's forgiven Scootaloo, thankfully,” she said.
Okay. What the heck happened?
“Honestly,” Rarity said, “it'd be a little unfair
I still Rarity hasn't lost her grammar, surprising.
KINGDOM HEARTS!
Surprised Rarity doesn't react more to her missing horn, and missing telekinesis.
Eventually, she came to the source of the scent: Spike.
HEH! You think Spike would smell of brimstone.
Blood, sulfur, metal, musk, the smell of a dragon.
Oh right, he's a unicorn right now.
He was silently glad that he decided to go back to working as Twilight's assistant.
He ever stopped?
wearing her discarded hat from earlier.
I must have missed that line.
gamboled
New word for me.
he said, holding up a picnic basket in his magic.
Sure got the handle of that.
++++
Also, my buddy the green Smooze would probably want to merge with you.
The scary part is that Discord is probably right!
And they become the purple smooze.
Stay Puft Marshmallow Mare, but then you'd be completely edible.
Poor Rarity.
the fastest fish in the seas, but the seaponies find them incredibly delicious.
Seaponies are omnivores?
“A cosmic abomination that drives anyone who looks at it insane!” Discord chirped.
Well the comics did say that Rainbow Dash had never read Horsecraft (yes, he exists in Pony canon.), but she knew the basic premise.
“No, you work with me!” Discord said, visibly annoyed. “Do you have any idea how FRUSTRATING it is for a vendor to get a vague order like that?”
Ta-da. And I can't believe I'm on Discord's side here!
that would turn Miss Do into a smear! Seen sights so wondrous, so beautiful, that Daring Do would simply DIE from the sheer glory of them!”
So has AK Yearling. Her horror novel 'Beast From Beyond' was written as a separate work, only because she couldn't bring herself to write the encounter happening to her alter ego. (Yes, that's from official material.)
What happened with Scoots and Sweetie?
Is there a scientific method to it?
Since when does Discord care about that? Or even invoke it?
This begins to get slightly preachy here, but thankfully doesn't quite slip into full on accusation fic territory.
And it's more like 99 out of 100 will give similar answers to what awesome is. And the 1 of a 100 will feel left out and alienated and alone in a crowd and afraid to share their tastes or views because all it ever gets them is brow beaten and feeling MORE alienated than when they started!
turn you into a parasprite for a week.
So Rainbow Dash would become a hive mind of swarming insects? Or would her children inherent all her knowledge, creating clone of herself?
“This should be an interesting week.”
Almost sad she didn't become a baby dragon.
match my age as a dragon,”
Or rather the equal in dragon years rather than pony years.
Applejack meeped. Being this close to an adult dragon, even if it was her friend, was unsettling.
Adult? She's OBVIOUSLY a teenage dragon! (Rarity as a teenager, oh boy!). Adult dragons are the size of buildings!
That Iron Will feller's a reasonable sort...”
She doesn't know he's married does she?
Rarity watched Applejack go, finding her gaze drawn to Applejack's muscular flanks. So firm, so tight... and her hind legs were so deliciously muscular...
-_- Can we please not go there? Please? Pairings of the mane six with themselves is like bland, tasteless mush to me. It seems more due to the lack of available canon males to ship them with than anything, or people not able to tell platonic feelings for other feelings (a goof I've made more than once too).
And realistically? Rarity and Twilight seem to be among the mane six who quantifiably been shown to be straight. (Another fan did some quantified arguments about why RD is straight, or at least asexual.)
Interesting, I've imagined Filthy Rich was blinded by his love for Spoiled Rich (and Diamond Tiara) to realize what was happening, though I do imagine after Crusaders of the Lost Mark, he couldn't ignore it anymore.
Twilight nodded. “If you're thinking she's not being punished, she is. She has a guard shadowing her at all times. As she's just arrogant, she's been judged relatively harmless. Every magical curio shop in Equestria has been informed of her, however.”
Trixie was foolish in seeking a magic amulet for a quick and fast way to gain power and GET BACK HER LIFE! But I'd say the Amulet was the real threat. Twilight herself said in the episode how Trixie's personality was VERY different with the Amulet on. Not to mention I'd say saving the world after what she did compared to Discord and Starlight kinda balances things out.
If you REALLY want scum who have gotten away it, see Flim and Flam, their fake healing water scheme, got away with their ill gotten gains, and now due to the power vacuum left when their boss was toppled, they're now the proud owners of Las Pegasus' biggest hotel!...
Ember is the Dragon Lord, I don't think Rarity CAN harm her or go directly against her (which is why Garble becoming Dragon Lord would have been such a disaster, dragons aren't feared for being push overs).
“They aren't treasures, they're living beings!” Ember roared back.
For dragons, that can amount to the same thing.
Even with dragon greed filling her, Rarity is still generous.
And Discord actually turned Celestia into a pegasus for one day as a birthday present in the comics.
Why do I imagine the sirens, sneaking through the mirror portal, crawling since they no longer levitate, and using as much of their fortune from centuries alive has granted them, to get Discord to turn them into Alicorns for as long as possible, and challenge the Princesses for the throne of Equestria.
No no will vote for Dash being an earth pony to challenge AJ
Granted, that second bit is only part of the full thesis Rainbow Dash apparently wrote in The Trial of Fluttershy Flutters, but suffice it to say it has been analyzed and there is canonical evidence that these words have specific meanings to Rainbow. (May the Best Pet Win.)
Rainbow Dash as a griffin would be cool, but a bit cliche. A dragon would be awesome, but Rarity just did that. Either one could be great, really.
man this story keeps making me laugh. excellent work
DASH THE TORTOISE :p
Why ?
How/why does Filthy Rich know Zebra language ?
Isn't every pony Bi ?
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Conservation of mass. Mystique from Marvel can't turn into Godzilla, after all. At best she could probably manage Juggernaut.
He's a businessman. I can't imagine a good businessman not knowing multiple languages. Barnyard Bargains seems to be very Walmart-esque, and surely to God Zecora isn't the only zebra in Equestria.
For the purpose of this story, no.
If Lyra stepped through the mirror portal now, would she end up a naked pony in the human world?
they're all just like
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If I could get a transformation into anything by Discord I'd want to be a dragon
This is by far one of the most amusing chapters!
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Better add Gabby, Smolder, and Starlight in there too
I'm safe, I have legal toilet paper.