Twilight Sparkle receives a new book from Discord chock-full of interesting and unknown facts about draconequi. How fascinating!
Nothing sinister about that, right?
Just a nice, polite Canadian.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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looks intriguing my friend.
Alright, I think this story is hilarious. You are a writing god, Derpy. Also, just taking a shot in the dark: Discord is one of your favorite characters, correct? He IS mine. He's more than just the annoying troll of the show, he an actual character, who has had plenty of development, and I love him
Very Interesting. ~hug
Is that draconequi now called Donald Trump?
Fact 102: A single member of the species is called a draconequus. However, technically every individual of the species is a plural entity.
Sombra hat/coat rack. lol~hug
I see what you did there.
I knew it.
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Fact 103: Discord is best draconequus
7153737 Fact 104: Draconequi don't actually ice-cream. They just eat it when it's most inconvenient for the pony in question.
Nope. That’s totally not an author name I’ve seen before. Not at all.
So draconequus individuals are plural whenever they feel like it? Makes sense.
Maybe that pen is on another planet inhabited by one lone man who keeps saying that nothing is true...
Ha. After Fact 99, Twilight's going to be very suspicious if her next hayburger is really good...
Does anyone of them know Captain Jean-Luc Picard?
I would like to see art of this.
Knighty, please add the ability to use Comic Sans in comments .
I would also like to see art of this. The mouths, I mean.
disdain?
Fact 103 (alarajrogers took Fact 102): Years before King Sombra’s reign, a draconequi accidentally started the changeling race by spilling blackberry frogurt on crystal ponies. Said frogurt was cursed. That’s bad.
Yottall Ton Ciddors thats totally not discord with the letters mixed up
Yottall Ton Ciddors...?
That seems mighty familiar.
Totally Not Discord?
I see what you did there,
P.S.: 'Draconequi' is plural. The singular form is 'draconequus'.
This must be a "This sentence is false" paradox, right?
Alternative fact: Books written by a draconequi can read your mind.
I guess something's going to happen in the next chapter, right?
Nice song reference.
I can only assume you mean 'bowels'.
Also, as has been noted, there are multiple times where you refer to a single draconequus with the plural form of the word.
I can't even begin to describe how amazing this is
hoarding
Fact 105: It is thought that Celestia is an Alicorn...this is not quite true.
Alicorns are simply Draconequis in denial.
There is one draconequus. There are two draconequi.
That was fun. Could definitely stand a pass or two with the Edit-o-Tron, but fun nonetheless.
You know what I bet the real joke is? Every single one of those things was true, and now Twilight will never believe it.
That's the best plan you can come up with, Twi?
We're doomed....
I wish I had a plushie that can do things like that. (stares at my Yoshi plush) Hey! Do something for heaven's sake!
Yeah, things are not gonna be pretty in the next chapter.
Sombra would be rolling in his grave...if he had a grave, that is.
SEXUAL FACTS!
Oh yes, they do.
Pinkie Pie also has the ability to create babies out of her own tail.
pre01.deviantart.net/47de/th/pre/f/2015/028/2/7/how_more_babies_are_made_by_beavernator-d8fr3ks.png
It must be due to all of the cakes she ate in the past, eh?
7154051
42b. The Icebox Horde is the reason why the Frozen North got that way. But you didn't read that from me.
Oh, Twilight. You should've known better than to read a book full of cheesy facts written by Discord. I think my favorite facts were the ones that reacted to Twilight's actions (37 and 79).
If there's one fact I want to add, it'll be this:
"Draconequi know how many licks it takes to get to the center of the Tootsie Roll Pop: one. They just eat the whole thing because they're so tiny."
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Actually, probably yes. Donald Trump is currently 69 years old...
Uhh...
{Insert Illuminati Joke}
This is hilarious in the most perfect way
i.imgur.com/himZD0M.gif
45:
7153997 Has that joke been used before, or are you just good at word scrambles?
7154300 It seems mildly familiar, but I can't place it.
...and it was rather simple and funny.
Fact 14 made me sad.
But Fact 15 was hilarious and made it all better. Although it is about a strange creature following little foals around and staring at them all their lives, so it really should be scarier than it is funny. Yet it's funny.
My headcanon about draconequi goes that there is a race of these creatures, but they are not a race of chaos spirits. Discord has a species name, but it wouldn't make sense for there to be more than one being with his powers. So I think that a draconequus is what happens when a dragon and a pony somehow manage to conceive a child (probably a very rare or freak occurrence, kind of like a cockatrice's birth), and apart from being a jumble of different animals, they don't have any unusual abilities that you wouldn't expect them to have. Discord, being the spirit of chaos, can change his own appearance to suit his whims (we've seen him change his look plenty of times) and he just likes the way draconequi look; they appeal to his love of bizarreness. So he chooses to look like one, but since he's Discord, he doesn't actually have a species.
Cool facts. Definitely gonna keep reading.
Ain't that cute. I wonder if they enjoy Cupcakes on stormy nights.
With a small loan of a million bits...
I feel as though this is a reference to something, but I'm just not getting it...
Another Discord fic? Sombra's beginning to think you forgot about him. He came over and I spent about four hours convincing him you hadn't.
(Totally joking, this fic looks great haha.)
Twilight has yet to question Pinkie and/or her family about her existence
That was hilarious! All of it! I figured Discord was up to something stupid when the book started dropping hints about him being up to no good. I might just try something like this myself, if I have the time.
Huh... I was expecting the last fact to be the Draconequi loved making fake facts, but I figured he'd tack on "True Story." By having a sentence fragment, the fact is not necessarily a lie, because he's not speaking in complete sentences, but it also has a 91 percent chance of being false, which would make it a lie.
Also, 9% of the current "facts" given cannot be false. 21. exists to prove 22. 22. Can be false, but 21. cannot be false in and of itself. 33. and 34. are actually the same reason tied by an elipsis, bringing our list of "facts" down to 100 -- which is important for the math. 37. is a simple statement not a fact. 19. 46. and 64. were meant as omens and not facts, so their validity doesn't matter when they served their implicit purpose to be seem ominous. 69. is similar to 33. 78. and 79. are also commands/omens and were never meant by the author to be taken as pure fact but as foreshadowing. That brings us to 8 not-lies in 100 "facts". If 101. is true, 91 percent of the rest of the would be presumably false, but if "True story." was tacked onto 101 that would lend merit to fact that 36 may be true and that might mean 101. is meant to implicitly be read Draconequi like making up facts, but not all facts you hear may be wrong, and that would drive Twilight crazy trying to figure out which facts were true and which weren't and if the paradox of that clashing with the original reason for some reasons to maybe be true means she's barking up the wrong tree, but that would set everything back in place so that 36. has merit again so suddenly she's back to the right tree only to find the wrong tree again, and then she'll come to hate that metaphor, which will cause her to hate trees, which will cause her to hate Tree Hugger(s).
Just as planned.
Ok... I'm done now. Got it all out of my system.
101. Superman and the Flash once had a race to the end of the universe to see who was faster. Batman won because Discord was a big fan of the Dark Knight trilogy.
This should be singular. Also the other times you did the same thing. If you're having trouble, try replacing 'draconequus' with 'dog' in the sentence. If it feels natural to use 'dog', use 'draconequus'. If it feels natural to use 'dogs', use 'draconequi'.
Caught it straight away...
'Totally Not Discord'