I'm lost, but I don't know where I'm from.
I miss them, but I don't know who they are.
My name is Rainbow Dash, but I don't know who I am, or what happened to me.
And I don't know if I'll ever be the same again.
Editing provided by LoyalLiar, Ruirik, and Mooretis. Cover art also provided by Ruirik.
Russian translation provided by Athlete; you can find it here.
Whooo hooo!
An away we go!
~Skeeter The Lurker
Oh boy, this time I can start at the begining of a 24th Pegasus fic. Good stuff!
But seriously though, I look up to you.
Can't wait for more and congrats on getting 8 likes what only 1 view!
Unless there was a color unknowingly added to the list of known colors in the past 2 hours, this is a mistake :P
This chapter lays out a great start to what will certainly be an eventful story.
Can't wait to continue!
...Oh damn.
This... This is gonna be a epic one.
~Skeeter The Lurker
Hmmm.
So she has a broken wing and amnesia.
~Skeeter The Lurker
Poor Rainbow...
This seems to be a rather interesting story. I'll be looking forward to reading more of this as it comes out. Keep up the great writing!
I require more.
This is excellent, and I hope to see great things from here.
Falcon mail? That's fairly awesome.
That bit of gold, the Element of Loyalty, I'm guessing?
Between those unfamiliar place names and the AU tag, I bet we're talking a little dimension hopping.
Also, 16 year old daughter, widower for 16 years? Someone had an unhappy childbirth.
Excellent work. Your grammar is fine, and the character introduction and development is beautiful. OC names are very good, and you've set up the basic setting quite well. I look forwards to more of this.
Hold it! I detect a grammar error! You said "off of" three times in each chapter, so six times total. While a fairly small and common mistake, "off of" is grammatically incorrect. Simply use "off" as the extra preposition leads to unnecessary wording and an awkward double preposition. Other than that looks good!
"He stopped. Her eyes were wide open and pained. Shrunken pupils against a sea of ruby stared at him blindly, eyelids twitching over glass."
Her eyes are magenta :P
Okay I'm done now, good work!
I haven't commented on anything in about a year. Busy with school and shit.
I'm here to simply state that I need more. This is fucking excellent.
Interesting idea. I'll enjoy seeing where this will go.
3166036 ok, RARITY
3168982
Well first capitalize your 'o', and secondly you should use O.K. or okay. Also only the first letter of a proper noun is capitalized, not the entire word.
Oh dear, poor Dashie...
Color me extremely interested.
3165003 I belive that you will find that umber is a color, it may not be a commen eye color but it's is certainly a color. I would try looking up the definition of a word before pointing it out as something you believe to be a mistake.
Umber
: a brown earth that is darker in color than ocher and sienna because of its content of manganese and iron oxides and is highly valued as a permanent pigment either in the raw or burnt state
2
a : a moderate to dark yellowish brown
b : a moderate brown
This is going along great, I'm really looking foward to more.
You know I would be interested in doing a reading of this for YouTube but I don't know how well my voice would suit this, so A. Would you be interested in someone doing a reading of this? And B. Would you like to know what I sound like so you can make a informed decision about whether or not I would be the best for the job?
Moar. That is all
3173986
Go for it, dude. I'm always happy to gain exposure for my stuff. If you're serious about doing this, and want to discuss anything about it further, PM me.
24
Hey look another good story……but there is one thing that i dont like about it!
Needs moar chapters!!!
3181435
Check back on Friday, and every Friday after that, and I'll get your fix for you
3181504
*Whoo hooo*
Hmm... This seems like an interesting concept... liked and favorited.
I can't wait to read what happened to RD... poor thing...
Keep up the good work 24th!
Pega-ace
3181504
But I can't wait 'till friday !
Seriously, this story is damn epic. DAMN EPIC.
3166036
The use of 'off of' is grammatically correct in informal writing/speech while using American English, which this fic is clearly written in (hence spelling such as 'color', 'spiraling', or 'center')
3195729
You ended your sentence with a preposition.....
What do you mean spelling by such as color, spiraling, or center?
3196313
Different countries have different ways of spelling certain words. In American English, it is most common to use the spelling ‘color’, while in British English ‘colour’ would be the correct spelling. The same can be said with spiraling vs. spiralling, or center vs. centre (the former in each example uses American English, and the latter uses British English).
3196419
Yes, I am talking about American English. 'Off of' is technically incorrect, is it not?
Seems like a nice rustic place.
With no knowledge of Celestia or Luna.
I'm guessing the storm had something to do with how she got there.
~Skeeter The Lurker
Okay, I'm quite sure everyone here saw that ending coming a long way off.
So, we have Unicorns, Pegasi and Earth ponies living together in harmony, apparently this is pre-Celestia and Luna, with those unnamed gods.
Anyway, like this new fic, and I look forward to seeing where this goes.
I'm really liking this story so far! It's keeping me interested and wondering what's gonna happen next
3199019
My guess is just that as ponies spread out after peace was achieved, some made it beyond the borders of Equestria. It has been at least a thousand years since the Sisters have been in charge. Maybe they fled the whole Nightmare Moon thing?
Do I mentioned how much I love this story ? Can't wait for more!
(Sooo.. Hawk x Flurry ? Why not Hawk x Dash =(?)
I REQUIRE MORE.
APPEASE ME, AUTHOR.
Now Rainbow goes on a rage spree
GAAAAAHHHH....cliffhanger, why!!??
Loving the world building going on here. Quite the interesting, rustic, little separate region.
3199714
Thank you very much! I hope you continue to enjoy the future updates to the story
3199776
Every Friday from now until my workload finally manages to catch up with me
3201371
Because hanging from a gently sloping hill isn't as exciting
3200746
. Just
3201452 Its the most likely event to happen, its Rainbow Rash and she overreacts.... i'm sure you won't do that though.
can't wait for next chapter
do you mine if i add this to a group?
3203240
Go for it! I'm always welcome to more exposure
24
Not sure if Hawk is oblivious or uninterested, but Flurry sure seems to have an interest in him. Ehh, maybe she's just flirty and I'm over thinking it.
Looking forward to seeing what Dash may know about how she's got to this foreign land.
Ok, apparently I'm the only one confused that the dad sent her out for groceries before sending for a doctor.
3207026
Priorities, he has them.
So, she's got amnesia?
Ok...
~Skeeter The Lurker
I love this! We're all still guessing whats even happening!