1. Member Since 18th Oct, 2012
  2. offline for 1h, 31m

(((Seal The Real Deal))) is harder than the steel of a battleship's keel

just say fuck it before you kick the bucket list

get 50 followers [X]

get more followers than Theatercritic [X]

wipe out china [X] (you just don't know it yet)

go to war []

return europe to it's feudal past []

get 100 followers [X]

invent cure for death []

get 200 followers []

get laid []

get 500 followers []

get Regidar to follow me []

get linked by any user I follow [X]

get any user I follow to follow me [X]

make a WTF blog for every nation


get an unrealistically high number of followers []

get featured []:rainbowlaugh:

witness the day an Acid Trip story goes positive []

survive the 2012 apocalypse [X]

collab with any user []

prove that massive group collabs can work [X] (never mind)

leave the site in a blaze of glory and broken hearts []

write a legitimately emotionally moving scene that will move some readers to tears []

never write a "proper" comedy []

memorize my MLA formatting booklet [impossible since I lost it]

rule the world []

become a known figure on FiMfiction []

Get Rough Water to be a major side story []

Age: I'm not telling.

Goals: long term destruction of China!

Favorite game: Pokemon!

Opinions: They should bring back Smallville, the Austrian Empire must be restored,  facebook is dumb but Twitter is worse, michael rosen is best rapper, and oh yeah: HERE WE ARE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Enlist Today! We'll be home by Christmas!

stuff i wrote

the acid trip saga

The HAS Meta Fics

Stories that should be read

  • Blood and Guts and Ponies Patton and the crew of a tank get transported to Equestria. Stuff happens and chaos ensues. But it ends up being deeper than that. by Altoid 126,768 words · 14,572 views · 1,407 likes · 73 dislikes
  • when heroes aren't there to save you if you didnt like scootabuse but you dont like scootalove either read this. by Rainbow warrior 19,947 words · 3,731 views · 97 likes · 13 dislikes
  • Fallout Equestria : New Roam The city of Roam is tortured by ambient and open hostility. Finally, a Praetorian arises to protect the city like the Legionnaires of old, and nothing will stop him. Nothing but himself, that is. by Delvius 580,479 words · 4,023 views · 257 likes · 36 dislikes
  • The Lone Korpsman A lone Soldier of the Death Korps of Krieg is facing alone a united Equestrian Army. by Lord Commissar Alexer 3,565 words · 8,944 views · 1,000 likes · 31 dislikes

stories i really enjoyed and thought deserve more attention

  • Killzone: Forever Helghan I will always be and forever will be Helghan (this is a story featuring my friends OC's) by XenoJohn 13,272 words · 774 views · 39 likes · 10 dislikes
  • Humanity in Equestria Humans step foot in the land of Equestria by SPkon107 41,344 words · 5,697 views · 142 likes · 58 dislikes
  • Resistance: Equestria One man held a device that he thought could turn the world in humanity's favor. But something went wrong. And now, an terrible war is brough by Evowizard25 72,939 words · 1,493 views · 35 likes · 11 dislikes
  • King Harkinian goes to Equestria This story is what all true warriors strive FOUR. by Dash Attack 15,075 words · 6,404 views · 85 likes · 18 dislikes

Knightly said banners make it better


*Seal emerges from the depths of the ocean with a might bellow that can be heard across fimfic*

So yeah someone finally did the basic factoring and figured out that classyghost was my  alt, I got a 3(?) day ban and now I'm back.

My time offsite was completely unproductive and just made me realize how little time I spend actively on fimfic these days.

*Seal stands up, his full hight putting his head above the clouds, on the ground bellow news crews stare up in horror as carrion birds begin circling, extending his right hand downwards and pointing his index finger at the panicking crowd he speaks*

Denizens of fimfiction! For daring to forget about me I sentence you to a fate more horrifying than any of the plagues unleashed upon Egypt! I shall unleash Sorrowful Homecoming upon your wretched mongrel hides!

Report Seal The Real Deal · 59 views ·
  • Viewing 371 - 375 of 375
#374 · 2d, 12h ago · · ·

>>2421138 And he actually thought he was gonna get away with it?

#373 · 2d, 12h ago · · ·

>>2421137 a universally hated asshole, got banned for spreading a rumour that someone he had beef with was sending him death threats

#372 · 2d, 12h ago · · ·

So I finally followed you, don't know why it took this long. Probably just kept forgetting, but who's Theatercritic and why is he banned? Wasn't here long enough to know what's going on.

#371 · 4d, 16h ago · · ·

>>2420406 Hehehehehehe :rainbowlaugh: less vulnerable, good one.

Ah well guess in Americas, White = Anglophone or English speakers as opposed to Spanish speakers. Damn wish I could remember that map that claims that whole Europe is Anglophone and of course including Russia.  

  • Viewing 371 - 375 of 375
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Ranking by number of followers:

0: Home schooled

1-50: Virgin

51-100: chronic masturbator

100-200: Club drifter

200-300: Sexual deviant

300-400: Child predator

400-500: deranged pimp

500-600: Bouncer

600-700: biggest badass in the galaxy

700-800: legend

800-900: child story author

900-1000: you don't need an editor, you need a publisher

1000+: Michael Rosen

I am currently: Virgin Chronic Masturbator

Best of theseal:

"To the pirate mobile!" Abaskuul declared and he and his entourage climbed back into the stolen truck, and floored it down to the docks. At the docks he accidentally ramped the pickup off a pile of skids and landed on the flight deck of USS Boxer. After that they stole a RHIB that they used to get to USS Bastogne. Once they arrived at the bridge Abaskuul nodded to the other captains, "Hello, and to the owner of USS Boxer, the harbour security pick up on the flightdeck, my bad, I let Arastoo drive and he's a little tipsy after his first drink."

Arastoo for his part was leaning up against a wall for support, "I... I... I was a good mus... muslim all my life.. now I'll never have my 72... thousand... virgins..."

Paul Ryan and the mane 4 where preparing to leave for someplace safe, if there was anyplace safe left.

“Halt villainous scum! You have violated the Princess! Pay the fine or do the time! We are the Equestrian Special Forces!” Big Macintosh yelled and the rest of the ESF grumbled in agreement.

“Big Macintosh what did we do wrong!” Rarity demanded.

“The princess wants all of Ponyville dead. That’s what!” the Twist yelled in reply.

“You must Die!” Paul commanded as he rushed forward revving up black dick and proceeding to slash his way through their ranks.

Before being killed Big Mac broke a bottle on the ground that sent them back in time.

If you really want to spite cyber: i'm an admin on his Catholic bronies, and since the group is inactive, I have no qualms about giving Christian bronies ex number one troll admin.

Test Tubes looked over at me and gave a small chuckle. “Define alright.” He stated, and seeing my worried look added, “Well her blood-alcohol level was high enough to qualify as a micro disinfectant. In all honesty I’m more worried about that then the actual disease.” Ok, I guess I’ll have to have a talk with her about her drinking then, but then again her cutiemark was a shotgun shell at the bottom of a shot glass.

places i hang out in

The fellow ship of the seal

124 members follow Seal The Real Deal

Seal The Real Deal follows 23 members


Just to piss off any fedora wearers

wow you have no life

You still have no life