• Member Since 28th Sep, 2012
  • offline last seen March 9th

Meta Four


I didn't write any of that.

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This story is a sequel to Den Fjerde Væg


Foul deeds are at hoof, and an ancient evil stalks Equestria once again. Its power will break and scatter even the Bearers of the Elements of Harmony.

Now, Equestria’s only hope lies far, far away—where rests a magic older and stronger than the foundations of the world. Though this magic is hidden beyond a fearsome barrier, no wall can stand up to a pony fighting for the sake of her friends.


My entry for the Rage Reviews contest FTP #16.

Big thanks to KuroiTsubasaTenshi and TobiasDrake for last-minute editing and proofreading.

Reviewed by PresentPerfect.

Chapters (4)
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Vinyl Scratch, the mare behind DJ PON-3’s purple shades, is boldly exploring new frontiers of electronic dance music. Meanwhile, Spilt Ink, music critic for Sound on Sound magazine, is just as boldly exploring how far he can stick his head up his own rectum.

Trace the trajectory of one mare’s career—and one stallion’s sanity—through this peek into the music world’s sordid underbelly: the album reviews.


"If you want to see a pure distillation of the most conceited reviewership possible, look no further!" —Chris
"Overimportant pretentiousness ..." —Present Perfect
"The complete verbal destruction evoked from this critic is so outstandingly cruel, it feels like I’m viewing a different kind of art." —Tired Old Man

Sold out on 31 Jan 2017.


This story can be enjoyed on its own, or as a companion piece to Octaves, by JapaneseTeeth. Basically, JT asked me to help with the music reviews in one chapter of his story. I enjoyed writing in the voice of a stuck-up indie music critic so much, I couldn’t stop myself from writing more, and then this story happened.

Big thanks to my pre-readers/editors:
JapaneseTeeth
KuroiTsubasaTenshi
War877
EQD Pre-reader 63.546

Cover art kludged together by yours truly. Vinyl Scratch vector by hfbn2. Sound on Sound logo is a parody of the Consequence of Sound logo.

Chapters (6)
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A tale, from the Land of Faerie, of a Princess who endured a cruel curse.


Cover art by Margaret Rope (detail of a window in Shrewsbury Cathedral).

Thanks to War877 for editing help, and Justanotherbrony for research help.

Chapters (1)
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This story is a sequel to Beauty Will Tear Us Apart


There is another secret agent stationed in Ponyville.

Some elder siblings are not as old as they look.

Ponyville's premiere party planner is pondering her purpose.

The world is not quite what it seems. A pony, in the wrong place at the wrong time, just might stumble behind the stage and see the the nuts and bolts that hold their reality together. Some ponies brush up against the dividing curtain briefly and never understand what it is they saw. Some ponies get a good, long look behind it, and their lives are never the same. And some ponies live their whole lives with a hoof on each side.

These are their stories.


The comment section may contain unmarked spoilers.

Cover art by the multi-talented KuroiTsubasaTenshi.

Big thanks to my pre-readers (in roughly chronological order):
cleverpun
Midnight Rambler
Justanotherbrony
KuroiTsubasaTenshi
war877
JapaneseTeeth

Look at this guy who said something about this, one time.
And also this guy.

Chapters (3)
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You are entering another dimension, a land not of sight or sound, but of mind and magic. It is a realm where light hides amongst the shadows, and your enemies wear the faces of your friends. This is a dimension we call … The Gray Zone.

Submitted for your consideration: Canterlot, the capital of Equestria, the gleaming city on the mountain. Just yesterday, the city was host to a lavish Royal Wedding—and it fought off an invasion of shapeshifting insects. Today, the ponies fancy themselves safe. But as they will soon discover, their worst enemy still walks among them, unseen. The real nightmare has only begun …

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My tribute to a classic episode of The Twilight Zone.

Many thanks to my pre-readers:
JapaneseTeeth
KuroiTsubasaTenshi
Yami Vizzini

Chapters (3)
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A compendium of sketches of far corners of the multiverse. Ideas that were amusing enough to write down, but not quite meaty enough to build a full story on.

Marked "Complete" because each chapter is a standalone story, but I will be adding more stories as inspiration strikes. In spite of the "Teen" rating, most stories should have "Everyone" content; stories with actual "Teen" content will be marked with a [T].

Yak Attak: In which Ponyville is already home to a couple of immigrants from Yakyakistan. With them "helping" the mane six, the diplomatic visit with Prince Rutherford goes in a rather different direction.
That's my name ...: In which a cross-eyed pegasus breaks the census.
Dewey led a very interesting life, you see: A feghoot.
Veto: Two weeks after the attempted Changeling invasion, something surprising happens at the Equestrian Senate.
From Canterlot Boutique with Love: Another feghoot.
The Cutie Relapse: Starlight Glimmer and her teacher have an unpleasant but necessary meeting.
... don't wear it out.: Pinkie Pie takes a cliché very, very literally.
Change(ling)s and Forms: After Spike befriends Thorax, Twilight discovers that changelings are even better at blending in than anypony suspected.
Between a Spike and a Hard Place: AKA how "Princess Spike" should have ended.
When all you have is a spell book ...: Stupidlight Glimbutt gets a lot of mileage out of her new favorite spell. [Teen]
The Longest Line: Twilight Sparkle (not our Twilight, but a Twilight none the less) passes through water and fire to see a friend again. [Teen]
I Am the Night ... Glider: Night Glider never forgave Starlight Glimmer, and now she's back to get her revenge. (Available in two wildly different versions.)
Domains: Regarding Luna's Moon, Celestia's Sun, and the difficulties of being the Only Sane Alicorn in the kingdom.

Chapters (14)
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This story is a sequel to Alarm Clock


Ditzy Doo, Royal Secret Service agent in training, tracks an architect whose building almost destroyed Ponyville. The trail leads right to one of Canterlot’s most prestigious art museums. Help from fellow agent Time Turner ensures this job won’t be too hard; help from an unexpected old acquaintance ensures this won’t be too easy, either.

It means days of research, prep work, and amateur art criticism; five minutes of sheer terror; and hours of cleanup—in other words, an average job for the Royal Secret Service.


Many thanks to my prereaders:
Kuroi Tsubasa Tenshi
Japanese Teeth
Sereg
Yami Vizzini
Justanotherbrony

Cover art assembled from:
Composition VI by Wassily Kandinsky, horizontally flipped because I'm a bad person.
Derpy vector by Euguene-Joe-C.
Dr. Hooves vector by Haretrinity.
Trixie vector by Tourniquetmuffin.

Scholarly analysis #1
Scholarly analysis #2.
Scholarly analysis #3.

Chapters (3)
E

“Past experience has taught me that telling other ponies about what I do is a bad idea.”

In this economy, it’s hard for recent graduates to find and keep a job. That goes double for a young mare fleeing the personnel of the insane asylum. This is the story, in Ditzy Doo's own words, of how she became a fugitive ... and how she found a place where she could stop running.

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This is a companion piece to Black Magic Mare, Roaming Queen. You should be able to read these two in either order.

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Cover art was slapped together from an art by Krololo and a photo by Chuckcars. Since the latter was released under a Creative Commons license, this cover picture is as well.

Mad props to my pre-readers:
Kuroi Tsubasa Tenshi
Sereg
Blank!

See what this person has to say about it.

Chapters (1)
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One is a pegasus who sees things nopony else can see. The other is an abrasive, competitive showmare. Can love help these two ponies overcome their differences and face the difficulties of the road ahead? Nope!

Sometimes the open road throws the least likely companions together. Sometimes, the last person you would expect can become your strongest friend. And sometimes they just drive you insane.

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This is a companion piece to Split Eyes. You should be able to read these two in either order.

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Cover art by Applelight Limited (modified slightly by yours truly).

Mad props to my pre-readers:
Kuroi Tsubasa Tenshi
Japanese Teeth
Sereg
Blank!
Justanotherbrony

See what this person has to say about this.
And also what this person says.

Chapters (2)
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Wake up. Go to work. Save Ponyville from unimaginable horrors beyond time and space. Have lunch with your PFF.

Ditzy Doo lives in a different world than her fellow ponies. She sees things nopony else can see—like higher-dimensional spatial anomalies, fae creatures, and eldritch abominations. And she uses what she sees to solve problems that nopony else even knows about.

But this time, Ditzy may have bitten off more than she can chew. Something very unfriendly is trying to enter Equestria through Ponyville’s Town Hall. An earth pony with an hourglass cutie mark has taken an unhelpful interest in Ditzy. The Princess’s personal student has grown suspicious. And, most irritating of all, her alarm clock radio is acting strangely.

Ditzy must race against the clock to save Ponyville—a clock that keeps playing the same song over, and over, and over ...

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Many thanks to everyone who preread and edited my WORDS WORDS WORDS:

Japanese Teeth
Sessalisk
Sereg
Kuroi Tsubasa Tenshi
CDRW
Clever Pun
Connelly
Justanotherbrony

Cover art assembled by yours truly, using a Derpy vector by Sierraex.

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Shoop boopy boop boop doop bedoop.

Chapters (11)
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