................ · 10:33pm Mar 14th, 2016
I probably won't be online for awhile you guys I'm ok now but.... I just need some time to talk to someone and be alone.
Signing of for now
Bye
Healing slowly..... And there might be times I show my real face
I probably won't be online for awhile you guys I'm ok now but.... I just need some time to talk to someone and be alone.
Signing of for now
Bye
Everyone else I know I happy with their life why can't I be its not fair........
My great friend angel song has helped me realise I don't need anyone's forgiveness if they don't wanna forgive me even after if been trying so hard to make change and succeed well then fuck them. I do not need anyones pitty from anyone cuz I'm hurting. Well I'm not hurting cuz of them I hurt because I let it hurt me and I shouldn't let it hurt me anymore cuz FUCK THE BITCHES at my school and fuck the dicks who chose to make fun of my loudness or my aperencs or personality. I have friends and
I'll leave this person unnamed but this person lied to many people like I did a while ago only this persons lie was words than age was canser lie and now I will always have trouble trusting people so now I truly and 100% understand how it feels.............
My new name is now nightmare dreamer
From hammer heart to Nightmare dreamer
Looking back if read old comments old PMs you name it..... Up to my first friend on fim who I lost a long time ago two actually.
Looking back on this if been crying tears of joy and sadness if had friends leave me and now I admit it its no one else's fault but my own I made my chose and it happened to be the one that lead me directly to more pain.
Im trying I really am, to just becume better, to become happy again, to be who I am in my mind and who I want to show.
No mater how many cuts,
No mater how many bandages,
No mater how many tears I shed,
No mater how much blood bleeds threw my bandages,
No one will care enough to ask if I'm ok,
No one will ever care enough to hug me,
No one will ever care enough to look at my arms and say fucking stop that shit,
No one will ever see me or care that I hide this pain.
Ever so close to being free,
Only to be pulled back,
And never be free,
Once she is trapped she is never relesed,
No mater how many cuts,
No mater how many bandages,
No mater how many tears I shed,
No mater how much blood bleeds threw my bandages,
No one will care enough to ask if I'm ok,
No one will ever care enough to hug me,
No one will ever care enough to look at my arms and say fucking stop that shit,
No one will ever see me or care that I hide this pain.
Ever so close to being free,
Only to be pulled back,
And never be free,
Once she is trapped she is never relesed,
Anna Blue Silent Scream
Watch that video and you will know that song is literally the life I live everyday.
Seeing ally of those people I don't know comment on my post made me feel so stupid. But uhh my attitude will be changing now I'm going to be positive now it took me so long to see it but I have someone to thank sort of for all of it well three people actually one being my boyfriend and I won't say the other two individuals for their privisy and the fact they don't know they helped me