I've mentioned a few times in my previous commissions over working towards some sort of goal, and yesterday I finally was able to purchase said goal and buy myself a Nintendo Switch.

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If you don't care about my personal ramblings I'll just give the commission info up front now.

As usual: 15 dollars per thousand words. I usually accept just about any idea from any fandom with a few exceptions in regards to fetishes or kinks if the story is going to involve sex. if you're interested in commissioning a story from me I'd be glad to talk with you over a PM.

Now, for those of you that don't care about personal ramblings can dip out now.

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There's a hollow feeling somewhere deep in my chest that won't go away. These past few months feel like a long daze where it's difficult to find a purpose in existing. I feel happy a good deal of the time, more so than I have before, but my production in terms of my passions have become all but standstill. I want to say something artsy or creative here just so it'll satisfy my need to write something important.

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I have recieved an overwhelming amount of support today, and quite frankly I’m a little bit afraid if I don’t shut it down now I’ll never be able to fill all the requests I’ve gotten. Thank you for everybody who commissioned me and I’ll be re-opening commissions soon!

It's been a while, hasn't it? I think that can be said basically anytime I make a blog post. I've never really been one to have creativity stay for a long time, and when it flares up I either end up writing a dozen chapters in a month or posting one chapter of a story before vanishing again. But for the past few days I've tried to stick to a bit of a routine after inspiration being fairly lacking for the past several months. I think I'm going to try for the time being to do one of two things

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I don't know if I've actually told the people who follow me in a blog yet, but if you follow TheVClaw you should know by now that about a month ago we finally made the jump of long distance to moving in together. In a few days I'll have been with him every day for a solid month and it's... odd. I think it's more odd because of how comfortable I am with it over anything. I remember my first night here after a long long drive I started to panic over what I had done, but after a good night's sleep

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Lately I've been having a lot of nightmares on a near daily basis. It feels as though my overall anxiety throughout the day is lowered, but around when I go to sleep and my mind does it's own thing my stress and depression catch up with me and attack me in the place that used to be where I was able to escape all those awful feelings. Last night I had a dream that my step dad stole a bong of all things from me (I've never used a bong) and hid it by eating it and mocking me openly. I remember

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These past few weeks have been... hard to put into words. My days for the most part recently have consisted of waking up around 9 or 10 in the morning, playing some video game after I get my coffee until noon, and then after I get exhausted from that stop and start to become anxious for a few hours because I'm tired and feel like I'm not doing anything. It's a strange feeling with my body going from zero to one-hundred in terms of okay to anxiety because it seems to happen every single day. Yet

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So in less than 24 hours I'm going to be 20 years old. I've been on this site since I was fourteen and it feels like my entire life. Of course what better way to spend my last day as a teenager other than to have a crisis because I'm broke, have no money, am waiting on query responses for me book, and feel like I'm a failure for having no motivation to ask for commissions.

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So last night was pretty bad for a good number of reasons. Let's start with the obvious; I got rejected from another agent for publishing reasons. This is the third time I haven't really been told why, which I understand from a business point but just getting a blank email telling me I got rejected without reason feels very robotic and dull. I'm aware I'm not perfect as a writer by any means, but just not getting told what was wrong sort of is worse. It makes me think everything is awful.

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