I'd first like to apologize for my two previous posts. That was a really rough spot in my life and... It wasn't very fun. I tried to avoid details, but it seems I'm basically an open book regardless. As you might have gathered, I was dealing with a lot. A medical bill of $17k+. Truck falling apart. My father would follow me around town, driving slowly and blocking my truck from pulling out of parking spots. I was blaming myself a fair bit for what I wasn't taught; he used to be married to the

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I'm not sure why I return here this time. I keep a journal and everything, so I truly could do such much more privately. Previous blog posts were somewhat aimed at potentially being helpful, though I think that's for myself as well. A sort of "Well this sucks" but attaching a positive note to it, that life is looking up or something. Moreso, I get in weird moods and I'm compelled to come here and blabber on needlessly.

This post will be more of a vent.

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I've returned in less than a year's time. Do you think it's common to read something you wrote not even a year ago and cringe? Not that the intent was bad, but man, the way I write is rather awful.

In any case, we're fairly into the holiday season. Hanukkah is nearing it's end and Christmas is but a few days away. This will be my first year where I'll be relatively alone. Likely still have my boyfriend and my friends, but you know what I mean.

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Hah. It's rather strange, isnt it? Nostalgia. Such is what inspired me to log in again, to this old relic. Of all things, as well, to reread old blog posts. I've kept a journal for a few months now, but these are ramblings I put down... Five years ago now. Just, wow. The oldest "journal" of sorts I own, this account. So I once again appear for a short while, and ramble on into the void of a long dead account in passing yet again, as is my way.

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I had some fun times on the site, those previous years when I was on here. I even had some fun rereading and finishing what had been in my favourites. Also good to see some of you are still active. I even considered just sticking around to read blogs, but I decided against it.

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I feel I must address some changes on my profile and state my current status.

My Current Plan
Now, as you may know, i'm very out-of-touch with the show. Very behind where it's currently at, and it's been (I think) years since i've seen what episodes I saw. As such, i'm going to start the series over from scratch and hopefully work my way up to where the show is now. It may take some time before I can return here and continue to read and review fics.

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Hello, everyone. I can't believe it's been two years since i've been off this site.

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As for why, it's because of a few reasons.

The first is that I wish to focus on myself for an indefinite time. I feel as though I don't quite exactly know who I am or know enough about the world. So, i'm tossing aside internet, TV, video games, and a large amount of electronics that aren't entirely necessary in order to focus on myself, to learn about myself and the world in the process. I've just been thinking lately, and a life of work and solitude sounds both nice and sound.

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It would be to just let your mind wander and let questions and information come to you. Just because you think you know something, doesn't mean it isn't unwise to review it.

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After much debate, i've concluded that it's all much more trouble than I would care to take on. It's either too much money that I don't have, or too inconvenient here, or full of uncertainties there... It's just too messy. Here, I won't be able to take the class I wanted, but i'm sure I could find something. I'm going to try out doing my basics first, see what I might be more into, and then i'll figure out a path from there from what options are available.

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