Manipulation. Lies. Deceit.
These are useful tools. Using them, a single man could destroy an army, decimate the strongest military installation, tear apart best friends and make them blow each other apart. Thousands of years ago, a civilization created crystals, whose only task was to do this. They had no goal but to be weapons.

Said civilization no longer exists.
But these crystals surface now and then.
Wherever they surface, they change the course of history.
One such crystal appeared on Earth, in 2399 AD, during the great civil war. The Terranian government, who ruled over a large portion of New Kinetisand, via unquestionable monarchy, were in combat with a rebellion, which called itself the Lost Swords. They found one such crystal, and used it to decimate enemy bases, simply by teleporting the crystal into it.
However, one day, said teleportation goes wrong.......

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Will gain tags as the story goes on.

After the world exploded the second time, Ford Prefect and Arthur Dent were thoroughly confused by the fact they were not dead. They were more confused when they were told about a new form of travel by Slartibarfast that combined bistromathematics and tea.
They were thoroughly confused when they ended up in a land of ponies.
Join our heroes-
Arthur Dent, in his heroic search for tea.
Ford Prefect, in his heroic search for parties and hot girls.
Zaphod Beeblebrox, in his heroic attempt to re-invent the Pan Galactic Gargle blaster.
Slartibarfast, as he repairs the shi- Oh. Wait. That's boring. Nevermind.
And finally Trillian, the only one being minorly reasonable.

Lil' Timmie was only valued for his strange skill. At the age of two months, if he sat on a keyboard or a typewriter and farted, wondrous pieces of literature came out.
Hey, I'm not drunk, why are you pointing that gun at me?

Please criticise. Tear my humour to pieces. Show me everywhere I go wrong.

Pinkie Pie invites Luna over to Sugarcube corner in order to bake Cupcakes.
The only problem is, Luna has recently discovered this miraculous, interesting thing called "the internet".
My entry to the Editors-R-Us contest.