Accidentally ending up in the jungles of God knows where, a yellow(ish) pegasus assists you in attempting to get back to a place you can't even remember : Home.
[ 2nd Person fic starring YOU and DARING DO ] You accidentally wind up in a foreign land, but you can't even remember how you got here. Attempting to find your way back home, wherever that may be, you team up with a pegasus who calls herself "Daring Do." What kind of sorcery brought a strange creature like you into this terrible world? And why would such a creature want you here? The two of you attempt to solve the mystery of how you even got here and how to get you home. But by the end of the journey, do you really want to go back?
Don't be afraid of the "sex" tag. This is not solely a clop fic, but it does contain clop at some points. Also contains adult language, so if you don't like that, then switch the "mature" box off. Simple stuff.
You feel your heart beating in your ears. You tentatively place your hands on either side of your head, as though that will stop your world from spinning.
It doesn’t.
You groan and sit up from your previous supine position on the rough floor. It feels like nighttime, but you’re not entirely sure if that is true. Your eyes are closed.
Squinting open your eyes and looking up, the light of the unforgiving sun blinds you and forces your eyes closed once more.
Yep. Daytime. Cool.
You struggle to rise to your feet. All of your muscles feel fine. They feel normal as ever, actually. It’s just your head that seems to be causing problems.
You stand on your two feet and feel yourself becoming even more lightheaded. But as soon as the feeling comes, it’s gone, and you feel fine. Great, even.
It’s like that feeling when you have to pee really badly, and then you feel lightheaded as it’s coming out, but then you feel fine afterwards.
That’s probably the best analogy.
You check your surroundings.
You don’t recognize this place.
Trees surround you on all sides. The air is hot and dreadfully humid, and you feel your clothes sticking uncomfortably to your skin.
You don’t think you live in an area with so many trees, or somewhere that is so damn hot. You can feel yourself sweating just from standing here.
But...
You can’t remember where you live at all.
Come to think of it, you can’t remember what your house even looks like, let alone where it is!
Where are you? How did you get here? Why is it so hot? Why do kids love the taste of cinnamon toast crunch?!
Your mind offers no answers to these questions, and you feel your frustration level rising. You want to be mad, but you can’t get mad. What’s there to be mad about?
Sure, you’re upset that you’re not at your house, but what was your house even like?
You can’t remember, but you will eventually. You heard about amnesia and temporary memory loss. You just got to hang on long enough before you start remembering. Simple as that.
So, it’s probably best if you just wait here. Yeah. Just sit and wait for someone to rescue you. Surely you’ve gone missing and everyone that loves and cares about you is searching for you at this very moment.
==========
Nobody’s coming. There are no people. There are no helicopters or dogs or anything looking for you.
You sigh sadly and sit on a rock.
Ugh! Now what am I going to do?!
You hear rustling in the bushes behind you, and immediately jolt to your feet and turn around. You slowly back away from what is surely a tiger, or a giant spider, or a polar bear or something!
Your heart beats faster and faster and your instincts are screaming at you to run, but your brain wants to see what is about to kill you before it does, for whatever reason, so you can’t turn around, try as you might.
Out from the bush walks a yellowish pony with wings, one bandaged, wearing a pith helmet and a buttoned down shirt and saddlebags on its’ back. It looks at you with red eyes.
You feel your soul crumbling as the appropriately attired horse looks at you, and prepare yourself for death.
“Wow. I swear I see weirder and weirder things every time I do these missions.”
The horse just said that.
The horse... said that.
She talked.
Spoke.
“Alright big fella,” she says, getting a whip out of her saddlebags. “Let’s dance.” She leans forward and prepares to pounce on you at any moment. She flicks her head to one side causing the whip to slash out with a very audible and unmistakable ‘crack.’
You should probably respond. “...How are you talking?”
Her eyes get bigger (somehow. They’re massive) and she stands up straight.
“You... can talk?” she asks. You're definitely not in Kansas anymore.
“I... guess? If I say ‘yes’ will you hit me?” You back away a little from the horse.
She looks at you bemusedly before looking at the whip. She smiles, embarrassed and puts the whip back in her bag. “No, no. That is, as long as you don’t attack me.”
“Why would I attack you? I don’t even know you.”
“Good then. No hitting is necessary.” She walks right past you. “Excuse me.” She goes further into the jungle.
Well that was... strange...
...
Wait.
“Wait!” you call after her, running to catch up.
==========
The small, yellow, red-eyed pony disappeared into the dense jungle, which is very unfortunate for you, considering she was probably the only chance you had to get back home.
You doubt that it’s a good idea to try and navigate this foreign terrain by yourself, so you attempt to find the talking, clothes-wearing, winged horse.
You are high as a kite right now. That would explain everything, and you hope it is all that simple.
It could be stranger, though. Dorothy ended up in Oz after a balloon ride, right? Maybe something like that happened to you.
You continue to get snagged and tangled up in the roots and vines and pricks all around, making you very frustrated.
That little pony must have moved really fast, because you can’t see her. Or hear her. Or anyone. Or anything.
Life is over. You have given up.
Dark clouds that you didn’t even notice until now accumulate over you and release an ungodly roar of thunder, followed immediately by rain.
Life just keeps getting better.
At first, you think the rain will provide some relief from the hot and humid and sticky environment you occupy... but it doesn’t.
It’s still just as miserable as it has been since you woke up this morning. You should probably find some cover.
You quicken your pace and continue in the direction you were previously traveling. You want to run, but the numerous trees and roots around you make you wary of doing so, lest you fall and embarrass yourself in front of all the woodland creatures who are probably silently judging you as you pass by.
You hustle into another small clearing and look around for any source of cover from the increasing fall of rain. Luckily, you don’t have to search for long because of what stands right in front of you.
A giant stone structure, bathed in foliage and vines stands eerily in front of you. You want to be impressed, or scared, or curious as to why it’s there, but questions can wait for later. Besides, nothing today makes sense anyway, so just go with it.
Not wanting to stand in the rain any longer, you rush into the entrance of the stone building.
The air in the ancient structure is pretty cool, and it feels much better than it did outside. You decide to simply wait out the storm inside and then leave to try and find that pony again.
Until you hear a noise from down the hall.
The entrance of the stone building immediately enters a hallway which leads down a dark corridor to God knows where. And you just heard a noise from down there.
It sounds like someone set a bag down. You know that when rocks fall on rock, the sound it produces does not sound like what you just heard.
For better or for worse, you decide to investigate.
You slowly make your way down the hallway, allowing your eyes to adjust to the light. The halls are bare, save for the occasional vine that has worked its’ way in from the outside. The ceiling is pretty low, resting only a foot or so above your head.
The hallway is really long, so it takes many long moments before you reach the end. When you finally do, you take a right turn, and come in contact with the individual you have been seeking.
“You again!” she yells, retrieving her whip from her saddlebags, which are on the ground, and flicking it at you. The tip comes dangerously close to actually striking you on the tip of your nose. “I knew you were after the Elephant of Norsu! But too late, ‘cause it’s mine!”
She flicks the whip at you again and you retreat without thinking twice.
“Stop, stop!” you yell, continuing your retreat. “I’m not after the Elephant of... whatever you said. I’m just lost!”
“Pfft. Well that’s a coincidence, isn’t it? That you’d, somehow, by chance, end up in the ancient crypt of Paskapaa the Wise, where one of the most valuable and powerful treasures known to ponykind has been hidden for centuries!”
You have no idea what she’s yelling about.
“I swear, I just got lost!” you respond, afraid that the offending equine who may soon strike you. “I’ve been trying to find you for like, a half an hour, but I couldn’t, so I came in here because it started raining, and I heard a noise so I followed it, and now we’re here! That’s it! I swear!”
You shut your eyes and turn your head, prepared for an incoming strike.
But it never comes.
“You’ve been trying to find me?” she asks, sounding more confused than anything else. “Why?”
“Well,” you begin, looking back at her, trying to find a way to explain this. “I’m lost and I want to go home. But I... can’t remember where that is exactly.”
“And how am I supposed to help you with this?”
You shrug and feel your cheeks burn in embarrassment. “I don’t know. You were just the only thing I saw that could talk, so I guess I assumed you could help...”
“Do you know where you are?”
“No.”
“The name of the country?”
“Nope.”
“The name of the country your house is in? ‘Cause I doubt you live in this shithole.”
“I have no idea.”
“Then how am I supposed to help you? You can’t even help yourself.”
“I don’t know. I just don’t know what to do.”
“Well, sorry, bro. Can’t help ya.” She puts the whip back into her saddlebags and turns back towards the hallway. “Now if you’ll excuse me, mama’s gotta get paid!”
You don’t know what to say. You watch her trot down the hall and further into the stone building.
Ugh! Now what am I going to do?! That talking little pony was my only option, and now I got nothing... Well, it’s not so bad, I guess. If that girl is able to walk around the forest like she owns it, then certainly I can!
You begin to walk in the opposite direction, heading back out of the temple, in hopes of eventually finding a way out of this jungle. You walk about 20 feet down the hall.
“Wait a second,” you say quietly to yourself, stopping in your tracks. “Pony! Wait!” You call out to the pegasus.
“What is it now?!” she shouts back. You rush to catch up with her, and it only takes a few short seconds for you to do so. “And don’t call me ‘Pony.’ My name is Daring Do.”
That’s the strangest name you’ve ever heard, but you can’t even remember yours, so you won’t judge.
“Ok, Daring,” you begin, “what if I help you?”
She quirks an eyebrow. “Help me with what?”
You shrug. “I don’t know. Whatever it is you’re doing here?”
She looks you up and down. “You? Help me? Sorry, I don’t think that’s the best idea.”
“Please! I can do anything! Anything you want.”
“The only thing I want you to do is leave, so how about you get to it?”
“That’s not happening. I really need your help, Daring.”
She takes a deep breath. “Look, I have business to take care of, alright? So just let me do that, then we can talk outside in a less stressful environment. Sound good to you?”
“Yes! Yes! Absolutely, that sounds great.”
She rolls her eyes and turns around, beginning to walk further down the hallway. “Let’s get to it then.”
The both of you walk down the hallway. You’re not sure what ‘business’ this pony has to be taking care of in such a dreary place, but you’re not going to question it. She is your only chance to get out of here, so not pissing her off would be a good idea.
You’re very excited at the prospect of getting to leave this jungle. You haven’t even been here for a full day, but it’s felt like an eternity.
You feel adrenaline pumping and your heart beating faster at the sole idea of getting out of here.
“Thank you, Daring,” you say, unable to contain your rising excitement. You didn’t want to say anything, but you just have to! “This really means a lot to me that you-”
“Don’t step on that,” she interrupts, pointing a hoof to some spot on the ground.
“Don’t step on what?” you respond, unable to see exactly what she is pointing towards.
“That.” She points to the spot again. “Or that.” She points to another spot. “Or tha- You know what? Just step wherever I do. That is, unless you want a spike to go through your groin.”
Well, you definitely don’t want that, so you best do what she says.
You are careful to step exactly where the pony goes, but this proves to be a rather arduous task, as the hooves of the pony are much smaller than your feet.
Daring mentioning you getting a spike through your groin really helped contain your excitement. You were pretty happy to be with this girl but now you’re getting kind of scared.
“What was that you were saying?” she asks casually, carefully picking where she steps.
“Oh! Yeah, I was just thanking you. Not everyone would even consider talking to some random guy they met in a forest, so for you to be considering this is really-”
“Hold on a sec,” she interrupts again, stopping you with a hoof against your thigh, and taking her saddlebags off.
“What are you doing?”
She doesn’t say anything. She merely gestures with her head to what lies directly in front of you both.
You look forward, and only now realize that you are both on the precipice of a giant hole in the middle of the ground. The hole runs from one end of the hallway to the other, keeping either of you from simply walking around, and the hole is somewhere around ten feet across, making you wary of simply jumping over it. You can’t see the bottom of the chasm, try as you might, indicating that it is probably really deep. How deep exactly, you do not know, and do not wish to know.
“Jesus,” you breathe, figuring that if Daring didn’t stop you, you probably would have kept walking until you fell into the pit.
Do pulls out a whip. You don’t know why exactly, but you suppose you’ll find out soon enough. You just hope she doesn’t start trying to hit you with it. Again.
She grips the handle of the whip in her teeth, and turns her head sharply and quickly towards the gap in the floor.
The whip lashes out and attaches to a vine that hangs above the hole and just below the roof. You didn’t even notice that was there.
“Why don’t you just fly across?” you ask, figuring logic should be a factor in her decisions.
She points towards her bandaged wing, and gives you look that says “Obviously, you moron.” You understand now.
She tugs on the whip. The vine bends a little but does not break. Satisfied that the whip will stay in place, she bites down harder on the handle and lifts herself off the floor.
She swings over to the other end of the hole before letting go and easily landing on her hooves. She releases her grip and pushes the whip back over towards you.
Before waiting for you to swing across, she turns and walks into the next room.
You grip the whip nervously, and send a short prayer to whatever deity there is mocking you from above that you don’t die a violent death at the bottom of this pit.
You get a very brief running start and jump.
And in less than a second, you are on your back on the opposite end of the hole. As it turns out, you didn’t even need to use the whip. You were able to jump the pit just fine.
You give yourself a mental high five on the fact that you’re not impaled and bleeding at the end of a pike in the depths of the black abyss that is the hole.
Moving into the next room, you notice Do looking at some miniature blue statue. The statue reminds you of those Buddha statues, with the fat, little man who’s doing yoga and has his eyes partially closed.
Expect this statue is an elephant. An elephant who looks just like the Buddha.
Do is on the far end of the room, and judging by the arrows sticking out of the wall, she didn’t get there easily. You decide to just stand in the doorway to this room, rather than risk getting hit with any arrows.
So this is her ‘business?’ She steals things from dead people?... Alright then. Makes about as much sense as everything else does so far.
The room is too large to try to get across anyway. The room is probably 50 feet across, which is pretty long, and 20 feet wide, if you had to guess.
It’s just too big for an inexperienced, large target, such as yourself, to attempt to cross. But Do already did that for you, so you can just wait.
“Be careful!” you call out, having a very bad feeling about whatever it is that may happen next.
Do doesn’t show any signs of even hearing you, though you know she did. She’s just concentrating on what’s in front of her.
She walks around the podium the blue elephant Buddha figure rests on. Then she walks around it again.
She looks the elephant in the eyes, as though searching for something specific about them. Then she looks at various points on its’ face. Then its’ torso. Then the legs.
You notice a bead of sweat trail down her face. It surprises you that you can see this from 50 feet away, but you can, so you do.
She reaches her forelegs up, and you can feel your heart beat faster and faster. She’s just about to grab the damn thing. She inches closer and closer, not wanting to move too fast. She’s almost there...
Then she puts her hooves back on the ground, not touching the elephant.
You let out a breath. Whether it was out of relief or frustration, you can’t tell. But the only thing you know for certain is that this pony needs to hurry up because you want out.
This place is damp, creepy as all hell, and probably the most dangerous place you have ever set foot in.
Do concentrates on the statue before her once again, preparing to make her move.
You don’t even know why she’s here. What is she trying to get? Whose temple is this? Why is it booby trapped?
A sudden look of uninterest overcomes Daring’s face, and she simply grabs the blue elephant in her teeth, then throws it in her saddlebags.
“Got it!” she yells back to you. “Piece of cake. Now, what were you saying about going home?”
“I’d rather talk about it outside,” you respond. “This place gives me the creeps. Can we-”
You are interrupted by the entire temple you are both standing in beginning to violently shake. You look back towards the podium the elephant was previously on and realize it has receded into the floor.
“What did you do?” you call to her.
“Uh oh. Time to go!” she responds, sprinting through the room and towards you.
Arrows begin to shoot from one wall to the other as she sets off all the booby traps this room has to offer.
Not wanting to wait for her, you turn and run back to the hole. Without stopping, you jump towards the whip, grab it, and your forwards momentum is just enough to carry you to the other side. At the peak of your swing, you let go, this time landing on your feet.
You swing the whip back to the other side as you see Do exit the room and enter the one you are in. You turn and begin to make your way to the exit of the temple. You move slower this time, trying to remember the trap you and Daring had to avoid from earlier.
Luckily, the floor is so dusty and dirty and covered in cobwebs that you can easily see your footprints, and place your feet back where you did earlier. You take a couple steps towards the exit, placing your feet exactly where they need to be.
“Help!” a voice from behind you calls. “Gah! Help!”
You turn around and quickly, yet carefully, make your way back into the room you were previously in. Only, you don’t see anything. It’s just a hole in the ground and an empty room. Which is still shaking.
“Help me, damnit!”
You look down and see two hooves barely gripping the end of the hole, and now notice that both the whip and the vine it was hanging from are gone.
Quickly rushing over and peering over the side of the black pit, you see the mustard colored pegasus with a bandage on her wing wearing a pith helmet: Daring Do.
“Thank Celestia,” she breathes. “Grab my hoof!”
You begin to reach your hand towards her hoof to pull her up... but stop.
“Hey! What are you doing?!” she yells, sounding panicked.
You have a sudden idea, as cruel as it may seem.
“Please, grab my hoof. I’ll-”
“Help me get back home,” you command.
“What?”
“You help me get back home, and I’ll get you out of here.”
“Are you bucking kidding me?!” she shouts, sounding absolutely furious. If she wasn’t trapped in a hole, you might actually be afraid. “You’ve got to be the most-”
“Is it a ‘yes’ or ‘no’?” you interrupt. The room continues to shake. “Hurry up, we’re running out of time!”
She growls. “Fine! Fine! I promise I’ll get you home! Just grab my damn hoof!”
Not knowing whether or not she will actually keep her promise, you grab her hoof, stand up, and pull, sending her flying up in the air. She’s a lot lighter than she looks. She lands on her hooves and sprints towards the exit of the crumbling building.
She doesn’t bother to watch where she steps, only caring about getting out before she gets crushed the death. You decide to follow suit, and try your best to keep up.
You feel air blowing against your sides, but try your best to ignore it. You don’t know if there are projectiles just barely missing or if the wall is just blowing air against, but you don’t really have the will to find out. Just keep moving, and hopefully you won’t die.
The light at the end of the hallway gets brighter and brighter the closer you get, and you can almost taste freedom.
Daring grunts in front of you.
As you sprint the last section of the hallway, the air blowing against you ceases, but the temple is still shaking, and you are still running.
The light at the end of the tunnel gets brighter and brighter, and finally, you reach the end of your short, terrifying journey.
The both of you immediately collapse.
The ground is moist with rain water, but the sky has cleared and the sun shines cruelly down on the both of you panting, sweaty individuals.
Have I ever been in shape before?! you shout in your head, unable to breathe. You even find it difficult to swallow, let alone speak. But you have to. You may be out of breath, but you want to get home. And this mare promised to help you.
“I guess...” you begin before having to take another deep breath. “I guess we’re partners now. Eh, Do?”
There is a long moment of partial silence. The only noises emanating from either of you are the desperate breaths for much needed air. The cramped space of the temple did not offer a large quantity of fresh air.
You look up just in time to see half of the stone structure in front of you collapse. Literally. Half of the building just fell down, but the other half remains standing.
Silence has overcome the both of you as you trek further and further into the dense, humid jungle.
Your tiredness combined with Daring’s (hopefully temporal) hatred of you and what she got herself into has left nothing to be said. You didn’t want to make her agree with you by keeping her in the hole, but you really want to go home, and that was the only way to make sure she said ‘yes.’
Even if she said ‘no,’ you still would have saved her, though. But she probably didn’t realize that at the time.
You really want to say something to her, despite all this. The sounds of the jungle creep you out, so not having to concentrate on that for a while would be great.
You clear your throat. “Thanks, Daring. For helping me out and all.”
“Eeyup. I am a mare of my word,” she replies simply and quietly, not looking at you.
“I can tell. So then, where is it that we are going exactly? Should we be trying to find civilization?”
“No.”
You scrunch your face in thought. “What? Why? If I’m trying to get back home, then we should probably-”
“I know that, and we will do that. As I said, I am a mare of my word. But first, I have real business to attend to. I didn’t come all this way and travel in this forest for a week just to turn around because some monkey told me to.”
“Some monkey?”
“This is a business trip. I’m here on business.”
“But you said you would get me home.”
She nods. “Correct. I did say that. I swore it, and by Celestia, I’m going to do it. But not this very second. I need to finish what I’m doing here, then I’ll get you back to wherever the hell you came from.”
“No, no, that wasn’t the deal. I said-”
“You said that I need to help you get back home. That was it. Then you pulled me out of the hole and that was the end of the conversation.”
Shit. She’s right.
“Then when will I get to go home?!” you ask/shout.
“I told you. When we’re done here, I will get you home. You have my word.”
You sigh.
Fan-fucking-tastic.
==========
“Do you really think it will take long to find my house?” you ask, dreading the idea of spending an unknown amount of time in this forest.
“Uh, yeah.”
“Why? The world is only so big. It couldn’t be that difficult to find my house, and I’m sure I’ll remember my address soon enough.”
She sighs. “I doubt that. If I was you, I would be a little more grateful of me helping you out in the first place.”
“Grateful?”
“Yes. Grateful.”
“Why should I be? You haven’t done anything for me.”
“I told you that I will.”
“Promises mean nothing unless you can keep them.”
“And I will! Stop questioning me! You don’t realize how lucky you are!”
“Lucky? Me?! Are you kidding?!”
“No!” she shouts, facing you, looking angry. “I’m not kidding! Why don’t you just think about it for a second? Your hairless ass ends up in a forest with not even the slightest idea of how you got here! Then, somehow, you find me! And with the good, decent soul I have, I decide to help you. But all you have done is bitch and complain and get in the way!”
“Excuse me for wanting to go home!”
“You have caused me so much trouble! If you didn’t follow me in the temple, I would have been thinking clearly, and I wouldn’t have set off any traps or dropped my saddlebags in that damn hole! Now we have no supplies! None! They’re all at the bottom of that hole!”
“Which I pulled you out of!”
“Yeah! By making me promise to help you or you were going to let me die!”
“Bullshit!” You definitely would have gotten her out of there, regardless, but she clearly doesn’t see that.
“The only reason I haven’t ditched you is because I still managed to grab the Elephant of Norsu before it fell, so this hasn’t been a complete waste just yet.”
She pulls the small elephant statue out of her vest to show you she still has it.
You shake your head, not wanting to argue anymore.
==========
“What’s your name, anyway?” she asks, after another few long minutes of walking.
You don’t answer. You can’t remember.
“Hey.” She pokes your side. “Name,” she says slowly, like that will help you understand. “I told you mine, so the polite thing would be to introduce yourself as well.”
You take a deep breath and look at her sadly. You just can’t remember. You even forgot something as simple as your name!
“Come on. Out with it.”
“I can’t remember.”
“... you can’t remember?”
You nod.
She snickers. “Ahem, sorry. That’s not funny.” She smiles and tries desperately not to laugh, but she just can’t hold it back. “Ha ha! That’s hilarious!”
“Whatever,” you sigh. “Jokes on you. You’re the one who has to get me back home. A deal’s a deal.”
“A deal’s a deal,” she says quietly, imitating your voice in a childlike fashion. “I should have took a vacation.” She sighs.
The both of you continue to walk through the jungle, carefully avoiding the never ending vines and listening to the sounds of the insects around you.
An unknown object flies right in front of your face and lands on a branch above you.
“Shit, that was close,” you say. “That thing almost hit me.”
“That ‘thing’ is an Azure Jay,” Do says, pointing at it. It’s head and upper chest is black, but the rest of it is totally blue. “Pretty common in this area.”
“Huh. You know your birds.”
“Well, after travelling as much as I have, you learn a couple things. I’ve never been the biggest fan of reading, but I’m always up for learning something about the places I have to go to."
“So you do this sort of thing often?”
“Not entirely.”
She leaves her answer at that, refusing to elaborate any further.
The both of you resume walking through the jungle. Unfortunately, it seems that no one ever comes out here to hike or explore very often, so there is no trail to follow, which sucks for you. No trail makes it very difficult to move faster than .3 miles per hour.
“So what is that you do, exactly?” you ask, not satisfied with her earlier response. You still don’t know why she is in this jungle. You don’t know why you’re here either, but it’s not like you chose to be here. Daring, on the other hand, seems to be here for a reason. ‘Business,’ as she has been calling it.
“What I do?” she asks.
“Yeah. Like, why are you here? And what’s that elephant in your bag?”
She smiles proudly and stands up straighter, puffing out her chest a little. “You can call me a lot of things, but most ponies think of me as an adventurer. And the elephant I got is a very old, very powerful magical artifact that belonged to Paskapaa the Wise hundreds of years ago. This relic has more magical potential than 500 unicorns combined! And when combined with the other two artifacts we’re after, they might even be more powerful than the Elements of Harmony! Pretty cool, if you ask me.”
You have no idea what she’s talking about, but she’s really excited about it, so you just pretend that you do.
“That magical potential could be devastating if it falls into the wrong hooves, or claws, or paws, or whatever. So I need to get all three before any of my enemies or competitors do.”
"There are three of these things?"
"Yep!" She pulls out the elephant again to show it to you. "There is the blue elephant, the red donkey, and the white eagle. We already have one of those, so we are one-third of the way there."
"And all of these things are in buildings like the one we were just in?"
"I think so. I'm not entirely sure, but from my research, I assume all three are in various temples that haven't been used for centuries. But we need to hurry or my competitors will get there first."
“So, you’re a graverobber.”
Since when do graverobbers have competitors?
She looks back at you with a blank, bored expression. “Did you not hear anything I just said? I’m a treasure hunter! An explorer! A-”
“Graverobber.”
She takes a deep breath. You know you’re pissing her off, but you’re not going to stop. If she’s gonna make you go with her to find more blue elephants or whatever then you’re going to make her pay.
“No,” she says slowly. “Graverobbers don’t explore like I do. Go on adventures like I do. Have enemies like I do. And especially don’t have to put up with as much shit as I do.” She points an accusing hoof at you for a moment before walking again.
“OK then, let me get this straight... you break into temples, right? Like the one we were just in?”
“Right.”
“And in these ancient temples, there are old, valuable relics and medallions and stuff. Right?”
“Yeah.”
“And why do you think there are such valuable pieces of jewelry and decorations that are unreasonably heavily guarded in these temples?”
“...” She doesn’t say anything. She just looks at you and waits as you make your way through the dense jungle terrain.
“I’ll tell you. It’s because, long ago, someone very important and very rich died. And when they died, they were buried.”
“Really?!” she asks, sounding excitedly sarcastic. “You mean, when ponies die, they get buried?! That’s incredible! I didn’t know!”
You scowl at her.
“And I was thinking that common sense eluded you.”
You shake your head and continue. “Anyway, these temples were built, and their bodies were put inside, along with all of their personables.”
“Yeah. So? Why are you even telling me all this crap like I don’t already know it? This is a very large part of what I do for a living. You clearly don’t know who I am.”
You ignore her. “Then graverobbers and petty thieves, such as yourself, break into their tombs and steal their stuff.”
“That’s not true at all! Graverobbers are just lazy thieves looking to make a quick buck by digging some poor bastard up and stealing their clothes or watch or something. I don’t do that.”
“No,” you begin. “A graverobber, by definition, is someone who steals valuables from graves or crypts. IE, you.”
She turns to face you, scowling and growling and points a hoof at you again. “Don’t you start telling me what the definition to anything is! And stop talking like you know this stuff! You can’t even remember where you’re from!”
“I’m trying!”
“You’re failing!”
“At least I’m not some petty graverobber!”
“Petty?!” she shouts, stopping in her tracks, sounding even more angry than she was moments before. “Do you have even the slightest idea of how much this thing is worth?!” She holds up the ancient relic you both stole merely an hour before. “This baby has been missing for over 700 years! And I spent the past 15 months tracking it down, and now it’s mine! Hell, I could go to the nearest city right this second and sell this puppy for millions of bits! Millions! I could choke an orphanage with all those bits!”
You’ve never heard that expression before.
You quirk an eyebrow. “Then why don’t you?”
She puts the relic back in her saddlebags and begins walking again. “It’s not mine.”
You resume walking by her side. “Well, technically it’s not anybody’s. It belongs to whoever that dead guy is inside that temple.”
“Pfft. What use could this baby have to some dead guy? It doesn’t belong to him anymore. This is now property of Princess Celestia.”
“Who?”
“Princess Celestia?”
“Yeah. Who’s that?” You’ve never heard that name before. You guess this strange, jungle-ish land you’re in is ruled by this ‘Princess Celestia.’
“She’s the ruler of Equestria,” Daring explains. “It’s where I’m from.”
“So, we’re not in Equestria right now?”
She laughs. “Oh hay no. Equestria is, maybe, just a little more habitable than this place.” She laughs again, as though she is telling some joke. But you don’t get it, so you don’t laugh. You just watch.
As she laughs and her attention seems to be taken elsewhere, you observe Daring. Not just her face, but her whole body.
Her shirt and vest are cut up nicely, evidence of her masterful evasion skills. It surprises you that she didn’t get hit by any of the darts or arrows fired at you from inside the temple. And it surprises you even more that you didn’t get hit. You didn’t know you were a ninja.
A dart is sticking out of the back of her pith helmet, but you elect not to tell her about it. It looks kind of funny. She’s lucky that it was just a dart, and not an arrow. If it was an arrow, she would probably be dead.
Everything else about her seems as normal as it should be. Her bandaged wing is still bandaged. Her grayscale hair is still all gray. Her yellow-ish fur still looks like mustard. You can see the compass-shaped tattoos on either of her hind legs because she dropped her saddlebags. Her eyes are still red as they have always been. The red stain on her leg is... still... what?
Red stain on her leg?
“Do! You’re bleeding!” you shout, just now noticing, even though you got out of the temple an hour ago.
She smirks. “Thanks, doc! Didn’t know that ‘til you told me.”
“Daring, stop,” you command, stopping yourself.
“Oh no. If you want me to help you get to wherever the hell you’re from, you gotta keep up. Naptime is still hours away, little buddy.”
She starts walking again.
It’s strange that she called you ‘little buddy’ considering that you are probably two feet taller than she is.
You take off your plain white t-shirt.
“What are you doing?” she asks, sounding confused, looking back at you.
You walk over and bend down to wrap the shirt around her semi-fresh wound, using it as a makeshift bandage. Daring may have had bandages with her, but everything fell out of her saddlebags and into that pit, leaving you both with no supplies and no money.
“What are you doing?!” she asks, jumping back and away from your assistance.
“I’m stopping the bleeding, what does it look like?” You approach her again.
“I don’t need your help. It's barely bleeding. I’m fine.” She starts walking again.
“Do, stop!” You reach out and stop her with a hand on her shoulder.
“I said... I’m fine.” She shrugs off your hand and starts walking.
Your hospitality shall not be refused. Daring is going to be healed whether she likes it or not, damnit!
You jog in front of her and bend down.
“I said, I’m-”
She tries to jump away from you, but before she can, you grab her foreleg. Unfortunately, you grab the wrong foreleg, and accidentally put a lot of pressure on her wound.
She yelps in pain, and reflexively moves closer to you to stop the discomfort.
You want to apologize, but before you can, you need to take your chance. You wrap your shirt tightly around her leg and tie it off so the knot is behind her foreleg and not on top of her wound.
“There, there,” you say, rising to your feet once more. “It’s done. Are you alright? I didn’t mean to hurt you.”
She holds her injured foreleg up a few inches above the ground for a few moments, her eyes tightly shut. A scowl overcomes her face before she takes a deep breath.
“Yeah,” she breathes. “I’m fine... Thanks.”
She glances at you for a split second then turns her attention towards the direction you’re supposed to be heading in. Without another word, she begins walking.
That ‘thanks’ you got will probably be the most endearing words she will ever say to you, so you take it. You allow a small smile to grace your face before following her again into the jungle.
==========
The sun is setting and the jungle is becoming slightly darker, though the chirps of the crickets seem to be as strong as ever.
You and Daring have been walking for hours now.
It hasn’t gotten all that much darker, though. The canopy of the trees block out the sun regardless of the time of the day, so it always looks like late evening in here. But Do said night was approaching, so you better find a decent place to make camp.
That is what you are doing now. Trying to find a small clearing of some sort that will provide enough room and comfort for the both of you to fall asleep. Some place with water and some food source would be preferable.
Daring considered flying above the trees to look for a clearing, but you were against that. She is hardly of any use to anyone of she further damages that wing of hers.
She agreed with you, and now you’re both simply walking, just as you have been all afternoon.
“You hear that?” Do asks, her ears standing up.
You listen closely for any sounds besides the thousands of insects that are getting laid all around you. But you can’t hear anything. “Nope. Why? You hear something?”
She smiles and looks up at you. “Oh ho, you bet I do!” She scampers off further into the jungle. You quickly move to catch up to her.
You lose sight of the vest-wearing mare almost immediately. The only thing you have to go on now is that she ran in one direction, so you follow in that exact direction.
After only a few panicked moments of running, your foot gets caught on a root and you fall into a bush. The needles and pricks scratch your skin in a painful way, but it’s not the worst thing you’ve experience thus far today.
You crawl through the bush and spit, attempting to remove the needles and twigs and dirt from your mouth. “Blech. Ugh. That’s some nasty shit, I swear.”
You make your way to your feet and look forward. Sitting directly in front of where your standing, is a clearing. The clearing you’ve been looking for for the past half-an-hour... But this is no ordinary clearing. The sight is... breathtaking, to say the least. Especially after all you’ve been through.
On your left is a large patch of grass. No trees. No bushes. No vines. Grass! Just grass! Soft, luxurious, non-prickly, ordinary, everyday, god damn grass! You never thought you would be so excited to see something so simple. But it is what lies to your right that truly makes you smile.
A pond.
A legit, semi-clear pond! There’s even a small waterfall at the opposite end of it! Sweet Jesus, you can finally bathe! And you can drink! You’re so damn thirsty!
You rush over to the edge of pond and dive in. Well, belly-flop in, but whatever. The important thing is you jump in the water disregarding the clothes you have on and the contents in either of your pockets.
The water is too shallow to dive head first into anyway. It’s only about 3 feet deep, but that’s more than enough.
The cool water offers much relief to the hot and humid atmosphere that the jungle has forced upon you. You could cry you’re so happy, but you don’t.
You come up for air and immediately start smiling and laughing and splashing the water at nothing in particular.
“Made it, Ma! Top of the world!” you shout excitedly, not really sure why. “A-ha! I’m so happy!”
You put your arms out to your side and fall straight back, allowing the water to catch you and you go under. The cold water surrounds you once more and your laughter resumes. Quickly losing air, you easily rise back to the surface, but remain on your back, and look up to the sky. You haven’t seen the sky in a while. It’s really pretty.
The sun has almost dipped below the horizon, which you cannot see, but the dark red color of the sky implies the time of the day.
You hear a throat clearing from next to you.
You look over and see Daring Do standing at the edge of the pond.
She smiles and gestures around herself with a hoof.
After the jubilation you experienced upon arriving at a more than adequate sleeping grounds, the two of you took appropriate measures to make a half-decent camp.
You suggested making tents, but Daring did not believe that would be necessary. She has apparently traveled in countless jungles, not unlike this one, and informed you that taking the time and energy to actually construct a tent without any materials is pointless. She prefers to just lie under the stars, and if it rains, she just moves under a tree. Simple as that.
You don’t think you’ve ever gone camping. Maybe you have? Maybe not. But it doesn’t matter considering you can’t remember your own name. You decide that listening to Do, who probably has significant experience with this type of thing, is for the best.
You also thought about building a fire because that’s what usually happens when one makes camp. Daring disagreed with you, though. It’s too hot to build a fire, and the stars and the moon will provide sufficient light.
“And I don’t want anything to know we’re here,” she adds, leaning against a tree.
“What do you mean?” you ask.
“Remember? I said I have competitors, right?”
“Oh yeah. So? What are they going to do? You already have the elephant.”
She shakes her head. “Doesn’t matter. These guys will do anything to get their paws on this. Anything.”
“Anything?”
“Anything.”
You’re not sure how to respond to this, so you don’t. Daring must have some aggressive competitors. You just lean against your tree in the small clearing and listen to the miniature waterfall and the insects all around you.
Considering camp doesn’t need to be made, there really isn’t anything that you have to do. Daring dropped all her supplies, and you’re not making a fire or shelter.
You’re bored.
And dirty and sticky.
“I’m going to go take a shower in that pond,” you gesture towards the small body of water adjacent to you. “I’m gonna wash my clothes too. They’re a little... filthy.”
“Alright, cool. Oh! You can wash this too.”
She begins to undo the knot of your shirt/ makeshift bandage with her teeth. The shirt falls from her leg and onto the grass. She has a cut on her leg, but it’s closed and not bleeding anymore. However, there is a decent amount of dried blood stained on her yellow fur.
She bites the shirt, flicks her head up, and you catch it in your hand.
“Thanks,” she says smiling, before observing her legs.
“Thanks for the bloodstain,” you say, looking at your previously white shirt.
“You’re welcome,” she laughs.
You think that’s the first time you’ve heard her laugh. The sound is strangely... adorable.
You would ask to wash Daring’s shirt as well, but you don’t know how she would respond. She’s an animal, so clothes aren’t necessary. But she can talk and think like a human, so maybe the clothes are necessary.
You’re not sure, and you’re not willing to find out right now.
“Alright, sweet. I’m good. I’ll try to find something edible for the both of us.”
“Like what? A squirrel? Or a bird?” You don’t know anyone who has been in a forest before, so you don’t know what people eat when they’re here. Squirrel doesn’t sound like the most appetizing thing, but you’re so hungry right now you’ll eat just about anything.
Daring looks at you a little uncomfortably. “Um... No. I was thinking more along the lines of berries or leaves or something. Not... squirrels.”
“Well alright. Sounds good. I’m sure whatever you get is fine.”
She just looks at you. Like she’s studying you. Did you say something wrong? You know she likes birds. Did suggesting you eat one upset her?
“Can I help you?” you ask, looking back at her.
“Do you usually eat squirrels?” she ask genuinely.
You chuckle. “No. At least, I highly doubt it. But I’m so hungry right now I’ll eat anything.”
An even more inquisitive look overcomes her face as she looks at you. “Anything?”
“It’s a figure of speech, Daring.”
She tilts her head to the side a little and looks you up and down. “OK...”
She turns around and walks into the forest.
Well that was strange.
It was probably nothing. Daring is a little weird, but that’s to be expected, you guess. She’s a horse, after all, and horses usually don’t talk. Or have wings. Or red eyes
Turning your attention to the pond, you decide now is a lovely time for that shower.
Checking once more to make sure Daring is gone, you strip down to your birthday suit and get in the water.
The water is pretty cold, but you were just in it splashing around a couple minutes ago, so it’s not bad. It actually feels great, considering the scalding temperature of the forest.
You wade over to the far end of the pond with the miniature waterfall.
The water in some parts of the pond almost touches your waist, and in others it only goes to your ankles. It depends where you’re standing.
There is large pile of stones next to the pond where water runs off, creating the waterfall. A stream runs on top of the pile of stones and drops off and into the pond. The stones are about 7 or 8 feet high, perfect for a shower.
The water underneath the waterfall only goes to your knees, leaving your genitals exposed to the world. And Daring.
You look back over to the patch of grass that is your camp to make sure Daring has not yet returned.
Satisfied that the only sentient being in the general vicinity is you, you begin your shower.
==========
The shower was nothing special. You didn’t have any soap, so you basically just got yourself wet while washing yourself with your hands. You’re probably still a little dirty, but because you’re wet, you look clean.
Now that you’re done though, you decide it is appropriate to dry yourself and your clothes.
You already jumped into the water earlier wearing all of your clothes, so that’s probably about as clean as they will get. Except for your shirt that Daring gave back.
You wade back over to the edge of the pond and grab your bloody shirt. You dunk it under the water, wring it out, and repeat dozens of times. But the blood stain still remains.
You sigh and give up. Without the use of tide or other various laundry detergents you have no hope of getting the stain out.
You spot a felled tree at one end of the pond and think that will be a good spot to dry your clothes.
Wading over to another end of the pond yet again, you climb out and put your “clean” clothing along the log for it to dry. You sit behind the log and wait for yourself to air dry. There are no towels around. You haven’t seen a Bed Bath and Beyond anywhere in the forest so far, so you doubt there is anywhere to get a towel.
“All done, Daring!” you call out, settling into a comfortable position behind the log. You assume that Daring would want to bathe after you finished.
“Alright!” she calls back, but you can’t see her.
You debate with yourself over whether or not you should take a nap. Your pretty tired, and that would certainly help pass the time and allow you to dry off, but...
Yeah, you’re definitely going to take a nap.
You lean your head against the trunk off the fallen tree and close your eyes, allowing your thoughts to wander.
==========
You open your eyes.
You’re not sure if you actually fell asleep or not, but considering the sun is still barely out, you probably didn’t. It was nice to close your eyes for a few minutes, though. After all you’ve been through today, you can’t wait to eat and sleep.
You take your time to check to see if your clothes are dry yet. Which they are not.
You flip each article of clothing over and to a new part of the dry tree to hopefully quicken the drying process. As great as it is to be sitting naked behind a tree, you would like to return to camp and eat.
You take a brief moment to lean against the tree and think.
Alright. You can do this... Name... Name... Name!
You concentrate as hard as possible on something simple, like your name, but nothing seems to be coming to mind. A few words float through your thoughts, but you don’t think any of those is your name.
A few images, words, and numbers come across your subconscious, but none seem to stand out from another. None of the words or numbers or pictures seem to have any personal significance to you.
You take a deep breath. You’re so frustrated you could cry.
I’m going to be stuck here forever!
Well, maybe not, now that you think about it. Daring has been nice enough to help you out with everything you have been through, thus far. Granted, it hasn’t been a full 24 hours, and there is a chance she will run off in the middle of the night, but you don’t think she will. She’s been with you for like, 12 hours now, and though you may not get along most of the time, it’s gradually getting better. At least, you think so.
Have you even properly thanked Do yet? You don’t think so. You should probably get on that once your clothes are dry.
You try to think again.
Family... Family...
A noise in the water takes you from your thoughts.
You look over to the grass clearing that is your campsite. Daring is not over there, but something is.
Her wing bandage, her helmet, and her crumpled shirt are lying at the edge of the pond. So if her clothes are there, than where is she?
You don’t have to search for long.
Standing under the waterfall with her eyes closed and a soft smile, is Daring Do. Her mane is flat and her tail hangs straight down, and for the first time, you see both of her wings.
When did she get here?!
You glance away, your face heating up, but soon find yourself looking at the mare again. She doesn’t seem to notice you.
She stands on her hind legs and puts a forehoof against the stone pile that is the waterfall while extending her long wings out to either side of her.
The sight is literally breathtaking. You’ve never seen anything like it. You temporarily forget how to breathe as you gaze at the wondrous sight before you.
You feel strange looking at her, like you are. Not only is your face warm, but the rest of your body is too, and it’s not because of the natural environment.
Finally tearing your gaze from the yellow-ish pony in front of you and rapidly shaking your head to clear your thoughts, you check your clothes to see if they are dry. For the most part, they seem fine. A little damp, but not soaked like they were earlier.
You guess now is a proper time to get dressed and head back to camp. You wouldn’t want Daring to think you were spying on her.
You slip on your boxers and glance up at Daring again.
Who has chosen that precise moment to glance up as well.
“Gah!” she yelps, falling backwards into the water.
You gasp in surprise at the sudden noise and almost fall backwards, yourself, but catch yourself with a hand.
“Hey!” she shouts at you. “What do you think you are doing?!” She sinks a little into the water, concealing her body from the neck down.
“I’m just drying my clothes, what does it look like?”
“While watching me undress and shower?”
Your face gets a little warmer, but you try to play it off as nothing. “Don’t flatter yourself. I was just waiting for my clothes to dry.”
“Right next to the waterfall?”
“Where else would I do it? This is the perfect spot. Not my fault you didn’t see me. And be more careful next time, you almost gave me a heart attack.”
“You could’ve told me you were here.”
“I didn’t even know you were here. I was napping. Like I said, not my fault you didn’t see me.”
“Whatever.” She goes back over to the edge of the pond to get dressed.
You put on your underwear and pants and gather the rest of your clothing before walking back to the campsite.
==========
The both of you have settled down for the evening. Daring went into the jungle and found a whole mess of berries and leaves which she described as ‘edible.’ So it will probably taste like crap, but you’re too hungry to care.
You both lie down in the grass and eat what is in front of you, glancing around at the scenery and occasionally having a brief conversation.
“So where are we going after this?” you ask, chewing on some berries. “If you don’t have a map, then where do we go?”
“Wherever my gut tells me,” she replies.
“Is that the best idea?” you reply uncertainly.
She shrugs. “It’s worked for me in the past. I’ve got a sixth sense about these kinds of things.”
“About what kind of things?”
“Treasure hunting, of course! What do you think I’m doing here?”
“Grave-”
“Don’t even think about finishing that word,” she cuts you off, making you laugh. “You see this?” she asks, pointing a hoof at her tattoo.
You don’t know if it is a trick question. If you look at her tattoo, it’s basically like looking at her butt, and then she might think you’re some kind of pervert who was spying on her. But if she is being serious, then you look like some kind of bashful, nervous, awkward guy.
Your face suddenly feels like it’s on fire.
Throwing caution to the wind, you look down at her tattoo.
You clear your throat. “Wh-What about it? It’s just a tattoo.”
“No, no, this is a cutie mark.”
“I’m sure it is.”
“This is a symbol of what I’m meant to do in life.”
“It’s a compass. Are you destined to be stuck in this forest forever?”
She rolls her eyes. “No. It means I’m a great adventurer with an impeccable sense of direction. There’s no need to worry, we’ll be fine. As long as I listen to my heart, we’ll get what we need.”
“Yeah. I’m sure we will.”
You put a handful of berries in your mouth.
“How is your wing doing?” you ask, chewing. She hasn’t put the bandage back on since she got out of the pond, or her helmet. But now she is wearing her shirt.
She extends her previously injured wing and flaps it. “Pretty good, actually. It’s a little stiff, but that’s to be expected.”
“How did you injure it?”
“Eh heh,” she chuckles nervously. “Pretty stupid, actually. I was flying above the trees and I thought I spotted that temple we were in this morning. So I fly down to get a good look, but it’s not actually a temple, it’s just a giant rock pile or something. I pull up to continue flying but I didn’t see the tree in front of me. Luckily, only my wing hit the tree, and not my face, but it hurt pretty bad.”
“When did this happen?” you ask.
“Just a few days ago. I hit the ground pretty fast and felt a pop in my wing.” She flaps her wing again. “So I bandaged it up, and now I’m fine. It happens all the time.”
“What? Getting injured?”
“That, and flying accidents in general. I’ve never been the best flyer anyway, so I just try to stay on the ground.”
“But you have wings. If I had wings, I’d be flying around all the time.”
“It’s easier to say than do.”
You suppose that is true.
==========
“Why do you wear clothes?” you ask her, still not able to understand why a pony would need to wear a shirt and hat.
“Why do you wear clothes?” she asks in response.
“...Touche.”
You leave it at that.
==========
Do finishes eating, rubs her hooves together to get any remnants of berry and leaves off her, and gets up. She trots over to a tree before taking out the blue elephant.
“What are you doing?” you ask, taking a bite from another dry, disgusting leaf.
“Hiding the elephant,” she responds, placing the relic in a snake hole underneath the tree.
You tilt your head to the side. “Why?”
“Just in case.”
“In case of what? No one knows we’re here. You really think someone could find us?”
She shrugs. “Maybe. You can never be too careful. If an animal comes through here, I don’t want it to take the elephant.”
Did she say if an ‘animal’ comes through here? That doesn’t make any sense. She is an animal.
Things just keep making sense.
“Better to be safe than sorry.”
==========
The sun has long since set and the forest is now pitch black; the stars and the moon doing little to light up your clearing. The only sounds you can hear are the waterfall and the insects who never seem to sleep.
You look up at the stars. You can’t remember the last time you’ve seen so many stars in the sky. Well, you can’t really remember much of anything, but seeing the countless number of stars above you is astonishing.
“Psst... hey? You awake?” a voice asks from next to you.
You turn your head to see Daring lying on her stomach, looking over at you. She looks pretty uncomfortable, for whatever reason. You don’t know why. The grass feels just fine.
“I’m awake,” you respond simply.
There is a brief moment of silence.
“Did you need something?” you ask.
She takes a deep breath. “Uhm. I just wanted to thank you, you know? For saving me and all. I’ve been acting like a foal about it, so... thank you.”
You smile. “It’s no problem, Daring. Sorry I had to threaten you to help me. I shouldn’t have done that.”
She nods. “That’s fine.”
“And for helping me out. You didn’t have to do that, but you are, so thank you. It’s good to have a friend.”
“Yeah,” she breathes. “A friend.”
You look back up to the stars and quarter moon that shines this night.
There is another brief moment of silence. “So we’re cool?” she asks.
“Yeah. We’re cool.”
Her hoof lightly punches your shoulder. “G’night.”
“Night, Daring,” you respond, smiling and closing your eyes. “Sweet dreams,” you yawn.
After a few minutes, light snoring can be heard from next to you, which is soon joined by yours.
==========
“Hey! Get off me!” a female voice shouts from nearby.
“Hmm?” you grunt, still half-asleep.
The voice grunts. “Get your hooves off of me!” You hear rustling next to you, but don’t look over.
You open your eyes to see the sun has risen above the clearing in which you lie. You yawn and stretch your arms and legs, feeling and hearing a satisfying pop.
“I’m hungry,” you observe out loud, still looking up.
You look down at your feet and are surprised to see Daring Do wrestling with three angry looking zebras. And by the looks of things, she is losing.
One zebra manages to pick her up and slam her down on the ground on her stomach while the other two jump on top of the pile.
“Hey!” Daring shouts at you. “Help me!”
You jolt to your feet in a second only to be pushed down by another zebra. Before he has the chance to jump on you as well, you extend a fist which connects with his snout.
Feeling something snap under your fist and watching the black and white individual fall backwards into the water is strangely satisfying.
Rising to your feet once more, you charge over to Daring and kick a zebra in his side. He lets go to grab his side and you take the opportunity to pull and throw him off of Do.
Daring extends her wings at the speed of light, knocking one zebra off before bucking the other in a foreleg and then his face.
Daring looks at you and gasps. “Watch out!”
You turn, only to see a hoof rapidly approaching your nose.
You groan. “I think my nose is broken,” you observe, touching your nose with a hand and flinching at the contact.
“I told you to ‘look out.’ Not turn around.”
"I was turning around to look out."
“You’re an idiot.”
“It was just a natural reaction. If you’re so smart then why are you in here? You should’ve just flown away.”
“Not like I didn’t try.”
You observe your bleak surroundings.
You are in a very small, dimly lit jail cell, with Daring in the cell next to yours. The floor is dirt. The walls are dirt. All is dirt.
In front of the cells is a hallway lined with torches, providing the only light. There are small windows above each torch to allow the smoke to escape, but they don’t provide any light.
The cell is barely large enough to fit you. If you lie flat on the floor, your head will touch the wall and your feet touch the bars in front.
There is nothing in the cell except for you. There is no toilet, or even a simple hole in the ground. There is no blanket or pillow. It’s just you and the dirt floor.
A metal collar has been attached around your neck with a long chain that attaches to nothing. It just hangs on the floor.
Daring has chains shackled to both of her hind legs, and a rope wrapped tightly around her wings.
“Why am I not tied up?” you ask the only other being in the room.
“...What?” she responds.
“Why are you tied up and I’m not?”
“You sound disappointed.”
“I don’t mean to sound dis-”
“Just be quiet for a minute. I’m trying to figure something out.”
Daring observes her surroundings diligently, as if looking for something.
A full 60 seconds pass in silence, but you have too many questions in your mind to allow the silence to continue.
“Where are we?” you ask.
“How would I know? I was just as unconscious as you were when they brought me here.”
“Who took us?”
She shrugs. “Some angry zebras, I guess.”
“You don’t know them?”
“Don’t think so. All zebras look the same to me.”
That’s the most racist thing you’ve heard all week.
“Ms. Do!” a very deep voice exclaims from the end of the hallway from the now open door. Walking through the door is a zebra wearing a large necklace with a purple stone hanging from it and a large smile on his face, accompanied by two other zebras, neither of them wearing anything. “Finally, I get to meet you in person! You are very famous amongst us zebras.” He sounds a little too excited.
“Oh no,” Daring says, barely above a whisper. “Please don’t be him. Not him.”
It doesn’t surprise you that the zebra can talk. What were you expecting? Daring can talk. This zebra can talk. You can talk. It wouldn’t surprise you if everything living could talk. Even snakes and trees.
“What is it?” you whisper, wanting to know whatever Daring does about this guy.
“I’ll tell you in a sec,” she says quickly, trying to get you to be quiet.
“Let us out of here!” Daring shouts, turning her attention to the zebra and trying to lunge towards the bars in front of her but is stopped by her chains.
“Oh! Of course, Ms. Do!” he says quickly, apologetically. “My mistake.” He grabs a set of keys from one of the other zebras accompanying him and reaches for the door. “Allow me to get that for you.” He motions to stick a key in the door...
Before throwing the keys behind him, which are caught by the other zebra.
He laughs loudly to himself, no one else joining in. “Ha ha! Oh, Ms. Do! You are a funny one, very funny, indeed.” He chuckles to himself. “But really, Ms. Do, have you never heard of me? I’m sure you’ve heard the story of the Swan of Tissit? Hmm?”
Do shakes her head. “Yeah. Yeah, I heard.”
He laughs again, as if understanding some joke no one else does. “Good, good! Then you should know that I always get what I want.”
“What do you want, Kiduttaa?” Daring asks, addressing the zebra by his supposed name.
Why can’t anyone have a normal name?
He smiles. “Oh, I think you know exactly what I want, Ms. Do.” He glances at you, smiling even wider, and looks back at Daring. “And you brought a friend!” He points a hoof at you, sounding even happier than he just was. “Funny. I didn’t think you had any friends.”
Daring glares at the zebra.
He looks back at you before speaking again. “And what is your name?”
You shrug. “I don’t know.”
It’s true. You still can’t remember who or what you are.
“Oh, I see, I see,” his voice gets even deeper. Creepier, really. “So you want to play it like that, huh?”
Play what like what?
“Don’t worry, friend, we’ve got just the thing for you.”
Just the thing for what?!
He grabs the guards keys once more and tries to fit it in the keyhole. “Oh! Silly me! I must’ve brought the wrong keys.”
He tosses the keys back to one of the silent guards with him.
“Don’t go anywhere, you two,” he says, walking away with the guards following him. Before he reaches the door, he starts laughing again, but you’re positive no one said anything.
The door shuts and the laughter ceases, the only beings in the room are you and Daring.
“That guy is a psychopath,” you observe, pointing towards the door on the far end of the dimly lit hallway, still trying to process what just happend.
“You said it,” Daring sighs.
“You know him?”
“Kinda. I’ve heard stories about him and I’ve seen him before. His name is Kiduttaa. He doesn’t run this place, exactly, but he helps out a lot. And he’s insane.”
“Clearly.”
“He used to be a big competitor of mine, but we never actually saw each other in person. Good thing too. He’s creepy as hell.”
“What did he say about a swan?” you ask, curiosity piqued.
Daring swallows. “He was looking for this swan statue. It wasn’t really anything important, though. It didn’t have any magical capabilities like the elephant does, but it was worth a ton of money. So naturally, we both wanted it.
“He received a tip that the swan was hidden somewhere in a local village, and the ponies and zebras and camels and whatever there thought it was some religious artifact. So they were worshipping it, basically.
“So asshole over there,” she points towards the closed door, “goes into the village and tries to get it. Well, the ponies there don’t take kindly to that, and run him out of the village.”
“How is that a bad thing?” you ask.
“It’s not. But later that night, he comes back with a group of zebras, and he burns the village to the ground, killing everypony.”
You don’t know how to respond to that.
“This guy is bad news,” she continues. “If he really wants something, he’s not afraid to do whatever it takes to get it.”
“H-How can you be sure the village story is true?” you ask. “You weren’t there.”
She nods. “True, true. It may be just a rumor started by Kiduttaa to make himself look... I don’t know, ‘cool’, I guess. But it might be true.”
You take a deep breath. “Jesus Christ.”
“Who?”
The door on the far end of the room slams open, and in walk two zebras, but not Kiduttaa.
They slowly approach the cells. They unlock the door to your cell and enter, much to Daring’s confusion.
“Hey. What are you doing?” she asks.
The zebra motions for you to stand. “You. Up,” he says, pointing to the ceiling. Judging by his thick accent, english is probably not is first language.
You glance at Daring, who is looking at you. She doesn’t say anything or motion for you to do anything, so you decide to be as stubborn as possible and not move. One of these guys might have broken your nose, so you’re going to take whatever revenge you can get, no matter how petty.
“What do you want with him?” Daring asks. “He doesn’t know anything.”
“Up. Now.” The zebra says, sounding impatient.
You just remain sitting.
The zebra and his friend both grab onto the metal chain with their teeth and pull, choking and causing you to fall forward.
They pull again, robbing you of oxygen and slowly dragging you across the dirt floor.
You scramble your way to your feet, wanting the intermittent choking to stop.
“I’m up, I’m up,” you say, moving forward in the hopes that they stop tugging on the chain.
The ceiling is only a foot or two above your head, much like it was in the temple.
“Follow,” the zebra says, turning towards the door, gentling tugging on the chain as to not choke you, but forcing you to follow.
“Wait!” Daring calls. “Don’t take him! Take-”
The door behind you slams shut, and Daring’s voice is no longer heard.
==========
You are strapped face down onto a simple, uncomfortable, small wooden table, with your head hanging off the edge. You have chains strapped to either of your ankles which connect to the table, and chains on both of your wrists, also connecting to the table.
You pull on them.
They don’t allow you to move. You’re stuck.
For whatever reason, your shirt has been removed by the zebras. What they could possibly want from a bloodstained shirt such as yours, you don’t know. But they wanted it, so they took it.
You doubt the shirt fits any of these zebras, so they’ll probably give it back soon enough.
The collar around you neck has also been removed. You suppose the chains on your arms and legs are sufficient.
“As I asked earlier, my good man, what is your name?” the deep voiced zebra asks. You can’t see him, but you hear him walking around the table. As far as you know, Kiduttaa and you are the only beings in the room.
“I don’t know.”
He laughs. “No worries. I didn’t really want to know anyway.”
You hear him stop his walking in front of you, causing you to look up. He has decided to sit on the floor right in front of the table, a couple feet away from your head.
“Before we begin, do you mind if I ask you a couple questions?” he asks.
You’re not in a position to refuse. “Sure.”
“Wonderful. I can tell this is going to be a good day.” He chuckles to himself.
This guy’s fucking crazy.
“Pardon me for asking, but what are you, exactly? I’ve never seen a creature quite like you before.”
You can feel the answer on the tip of your tongue, but you’re not exactly sure what it is. It’s something like, Hu-... no. It’s... Ho-... No wait!
“Human,” you say, proud of being able to remember something. “I’m a human.” A smile comes over your face.
“Human?” Kiduttaa slowly repeats. “Interesting. I’ve never heard of such a species. Fascinating. And where are you from, exactly?”
“I can’t remember,” you respond simply.
He laughs yet again. “Oh I’m sure you don’t.” He begins to pace. “If I had to venture a guess, you’re probably from one of the small islands northeast of here. Never know what you’re going to find up there... Ah! But what do I know, right?”
He laughs again, a noise that you’re probably going to be hearing for the rest of your life.
“But enough of this small talk,” he says, sitting in front of you once more. “What I really want to know is: Where is the idol?”
“...” You don’t respond. You just continue to gaze upon the floor.
He chuckles. “Perhaps you did not hear me. Where. Is. The. Idol?”
“I don’t know.”
“I beg to differ. You see, Ms. Do, the lovely mare sitting just down the hall, is a notorious graverobber in these parts. For years, she has been snooping and sticking her nose in places it really does not belong.
“A temple collapsed yesterday, as I’m sure you already know. A very important temple to me and my followers. Which can only mean that someone removed the idol from said temple. Let me tell you, just because you have the idol, does not make it yours. It belongs to my zebras, and we want it back.”
He makes a good point. The elephant was not yours not steal, but what Daring told you earlier is still sticking with you.
Maybe this guy is lying? You’re not sure, and there really isn’t anyway to be completely sure. But this guy is completely insane, and if that rumor you heard is true, he cannot be trusted.
“We searched your camp,” the zebra continues. “We did not find the elephant, which can only mean you hid it somewhere. Tell me where it is, and I’ll let you both go, no harm done.”
You don’t know if he’s telling the truth. If he’s lying, then he is really good at it. Did Daring lie to you?
You’d like to think she didn’t, but you can’t be sure. You’ve only known her for a day, and she’s not exactly your best friend. But she has helped you out so far, despite that not really getting you anywhere, so you’ll remain loyal to her.
“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” you respond. “You’re asking the wrong guy.”
He laughs condescendingly. “Oh, am I?” He begins to pace in front of you as evidence by his shadow moving across the floor. He moves from one end of the room to the other as he talks. “Then riddle me this, friend: What is a strange, foreign creature, such as yourself, doing in the heart of a tropical forest with the world’s most infamous graverobber?”
That’s a very good question, and you cannot come up with any plausible response to said question. Nothing you say will ever be believed by this guy.
You would shrug if you could, but you can’t, so you respond with a typical “I don’t know.”
The zebra identified as Kiduttaa is growing impatient, as evidence by his pacing and breathing.
“You don’t know?” he asks.
“I don’t know.”
He takes a deep breath and stops walking in front of you. “I will ask this question once, and only once, and I strongly believe that it is in your best interest to answer my question the first time. If I have to ask this question a second time, it will not be politely. Now...
“Where is the Elephant of Norsu?”
==========
Do finishes eating, rubs her hooves together to get any remnants of berry and leaves off her, and gets up. She trots over to a tree before taking out the blue elephant.
“What are you doing?” you ask, taking a bite from another dry, disgusting leaf.
“Hiding the elephant,” she responds, placing the relic in a snake hole underneath the tree.
You tilt your head to the side. “Why?”
“Just in case.”
==========
You know exactly where the elephant is, but you can’t tell him. Daring said that she’s taking these relics so they don’t fall into the wrongs hands... or hooves. So she’s doing good.
Kiduttaa, on the other hand, does not appear to have good intentions for the elephant. If he did, he probably would not have captured and imprisoned you and Daring, and you would not be bound to a table.
You’re not going to tell him anything.
“Perhaps a visual demonstration may jog your memory? Hmm?” he asks, walking away from you. Curious, you look up to see him pulling an object out of a bag in the corner of the room.
The thing he takes out of the bag is red. And it looks like some animal. A small horse, or mule, or...
Oh! It’s that donkey!
“This,” he gestures to the object that he holds in a hoof, “is the Donkey of Tissit. It’s a very rare, very magical artifact that can only be found in this part of the world. And the elephant you stole, well, it’s a lot like this in some ways. This donkey and the elephant go together, you see, and when combined- Wait. Why am I even telling you this?” He laughs. “You must already know this!”
You do already know this, but you’re not going to tell him that.
He turns to put the red donkey back into the bag in the corner of the room.
Before turning your gaze back to the ground, you look around at the walls for the first time. They are mostly barren and brown, save for a few medieval weapons. You see a spear, a couple of swords, a bunch of machetes, and a crossbow hanging on the wall, as though they are decorations.
He takes a deep breath. “I have been very nice to you. Do you realize that? How nice I’ve been?”
You don’t. He locked you and Daring in a prison cell with no toilet.
He continues. “And you repay my hospitality with ignorance and lies? No. No, I don’t think so.”
This guy’s fucking insane.
He puts a hoof under your chin, and forces you to look up at him and away from the brown, dirt floor.
He holds up his other hoof and places it directly in your field of vision. A hook, a very large hook, is strapped to his hoof.
“My patience has reached its’ end. Do you see this?” he asks, nodding to the hook.
You nod. “Yep.”
“I’d prefer to keep it clean.”
...Wait, what?
“Because I’m such a kind, loving, fair zebra, I will ask you one final time, as politely as I can: Where is the elephant?!”
He walks out of your field of vision and to the side of the table.
You’re not going to give up. “I already told you. I don’t know.”
The sharp object digs into your back, causing an uncomfortable pain to wash over you. You reflexively straighten your back and pull on your chain, but they keep you from moving or turning. All muscles in your body tighten.
Your mouth opens as if to scream, but you can’t. The pain and shock is too intense to allow you to make a sound.
“Where is the idol?!” he shouts angrily.
You feel the metal object dig further into your back. A force causes the hook to pull to one side of the table, and you reflexively move your body in that direction as well, hoping to keep the pain to a relative minimum.
“Where is the idol?” he shouts again, even louder.
The hook snakes its’ way out of your back, but the pain remains. You feel a liquid seeping over your back, down your sides, and onto the table. You allow your head to hang off the end of the table, and hope that gravity will somehow allow you to fall forward and out of the chains.
“Wait...” you say weakly, probably not even loud enough for him to hear. “W-Wait...”
The hook enters your back again.
“Where is the idol?!” his voice grows in volume, but to you, he sounds miles away.
The hook moves again while still inside of you, but the restraints no longer allow you to move along with it. The chains stop your body, and the only thing that is left to stop the hook is your flesh.
Your skin easily rips as the hook trails along your back, going side to side and up and down.
Thick liquid is felt all over your backside, and you want nothing more than to wipe it off, but the chains keep your hands next to your head.
Your breathing becomes shaky and labored and you feel lightheaded.
“Please... stop...” you say too quietly again.
The hook exits and re-enters your back again, and your captor pulls upwards, lifting you off the table a little.
At this, you finally cry out in pain.
“Where is the idol?!”
Oh God! Stop! Please! Just stop it now!
Your prayers are ignored as the hook continues to pull until your flesh finally tears, freeing the hook, but only increasing the pain and concentration of thick liquid oozing out of your back.
You’re going to throw up.
“WHERE IS THE IDOL?”
The hook enters your back again.
==========
You feel an uneven movement from underneath you. Whatever you’re lying on is soft but firm and seems to be bouncing up and down ever so slightly.
You squint open your eyes and see the dirt ground moving beneath you, though you are not moving at all. You’re head is spinning and your eyelids are heavy and your back is in tremendous pain.
You try to move, but the moment you begin to extend an arm your body cries out in protest and freezes your muscles where they are.
Without an argument, you decide to move as little as possible.
After only bouncing for a few long, painful seconds, a door is opened, and you are walked through it.
The rustling of metal can be heard from down the hall, but only barely.
“What did you do to him?!” a female voice cries out.
There is no response from anyone in the room. The only sounds are the rattling of chains and the sounds of hooves clopping across the floor.
You close your eyes and try to relax as best as you can. The gently swaying you feel is kind of like being on a boat on a calm sea or on a hammock. A really small, firm hammock.
“What did you do to him?!” the female voice demands again.
A noise like the jangling of keys is heard, and you can only assume that a door is being unlocked. The gently swaying motion you feel is suddenly stopped as a key is inserted into the lock of your cell.
The creaking of the cell’s rusty door is heard, and the swaying motion resumes for a brief moment.
You are suddenly flying, but only for a fraction of a second, before landing roughly on your stomach in your dirty, cramped cell.
“Oh Celestia,” the female voice from next to you is heard, much quieter now than it was before. “Oh... no. No.”
The door is swung closed and swiftly locked. The sound of hooves begin before slowly fading away as your captor leaves the room.
“How dare you!” Daring calls after the retreating zebra. “Buck you, Kiduttaa! When I get out of here, you are done! Hear me?! DONE!”
You keep your eyes closed and gently shift your body into a more comfortable position. Quickly realizing that there is no such thing as a ‘comfortable position’ anymore, you elect to just remain completely still.
“Oh Celestia, can you hear me?” Daring asks from the cell next to you. “C’mon now. Can you hear me?! Answer me!”
Your eyelids feel heavier and heavier, but you manage to open them.
You nod your head in response to Daring’s question, but don’t have the energy to offer any verbal response.
“Are you OK?” she asks. “What did they do to you?!”
There is no energy left to answer either of those questions, so you don’t. You just lie there and breathe, which is getting harder and harder.
“Hey,” she cries, poking your shoulder by putting a foreleg through the bars. “Hey. Look at me. C’mon, look at me.” She pokes you again. “Look at me right now!”
You move your head ever so slightly towards the yellow pony in the next cell, and see her hoof extended towards you.
As painful and as difficult as it is, you slowly reach a hand towards a hoof and grab onto it. The hoof is soft and furry and warm. She places her other forehoof on top of your hand.
Daring has held your hand all night. From the moment you were thrown back into your cell until now, her hoof has been resting on your unmoving hand.
You haven’t moved all night.
The pain you feel in your back has been too much to bear while moving, so you elected not to move. Luckily, though, some zebra came into your cell around midnight and put toilet paper on your back to dry up some of the blood.
At least it was something.
“Hey,” Daring says quietly, her hoof leaving your hand for the first time in hours. “I’ve got an idea.”
Still feeling the immense pain of yesterday’s encounter with Kiduttaa, you don’t move. You just look up at her with your eyes.
“We can get out of here,” she whispers, as though if she talks at a normal volume, the zebras in the next room may hear. “I think I know how.”
“What’s the plan?” you ask quietly.
“Don’t worry about that. I’ll take care of everything. But I need you to do something, OK?...”
You don’t like where this is going already.
“What is it?” you ask, still not moving.
She swallows and takes a deep breath. “I, uh... I need them to take you away again.”
Oh fuck no.
“No, no, no, no, absolutely not,” you say, beginning to find energy in determination to not go back there.
“I know you don’t want to, but hear me out-”
“Daring, please!” you say, scooting yourself away from the yellow pony and towards the opposite end of your cell.
“It’s going to be alright! Just listen-”
“Daring, don’t make me go back in there!” The memories of what happened mere hours before will probably stay with you forever, and you are terrified of the thought of having to endure such torture again.
Tears well up in your eyes.
The cell is not that wide, and your side touches the wall, keeping you from attempting to flee from Daring.
She reaches through the bars and grabs your hand in between her hooves.
“Please,” you say quietly, tears threatening to pour from your eyes at any moment. You shut your eyes as tightly as possible and lay your head on the ground, not moving your hand from Daring’s grasp.
“It’s alright, it’s alright,” Daring says quickly in an attempt to calm you down. “Don’t cry. It’s OK. You hear me? It’s going to be OK.”
You take a deep breath to calm your nerves.
“Don’t worry. It’s all just part of the plan.”
You already don’t like this plan. Anything that involves you going back down that hall does not sound very good.
“They’re going to take you, alright?” she asks, stroking your hand. “I swear, as long as you don’t try to fight or escape, they will not hurt you. OK? I promise.”
You nod, despite not actually believing her.
“They’re going to take you in the back room. But within two minutes of being in there, I will bust in there to get you.”
“You sure about that?” you ask quietly.
“I am a mare of my word.”
She has yet to prove that statement, but today would be a great time for her to do so.
“Then what are you going to do?” you ask, turning on your side slightly in order to face her fully.
She has removed her shirt and gave it to you in order to stop the bleeding. The shirt is still on your back, and is probably stuck to it from when the blood finally dried. She also removed her helmet, and placed it on the far end of her cell.
Despite being completely naked, she is reacting to you seeing her like this much differently. When she was in the pond, she seemed mad at you and embarrassed.
But now she seems as normal as ever. She’s talking to you normally and not trying to conceal herself.
“I’m gonna get out of here, what do you think?” she responds, glancing down the hallway to make sure it’s empty.
“Then why can’t we just do that now? Why do I have to go back there?”
She strokes your hand with a hoof. “You’re too big. It wouldn’t work with the both of us trying to get out. But if they take you out, then all I have to do is go into the next room and get you. We’ll be out of here before you know it.”
You take off Daring’s now bloodstained shirt, which is more difficult than it originally seemed. Some of your blood dried on your back and the shirt, causing the shirt to stick.
You pull the shirt off your back, and hand it back to Daring.
“Thanks, Daring,” you say.
“Not a problem,” Daring replies, taking her shirt back.
You nod and close your eyes, hoping to build up some energy before another round of interrogation.
==========
You are awoken by the noise of the door on the far end of the room opening, shortly followed by the sound of multiple hooves on the dirt.
You open your eyes and look over at Daring, who is glaring at whoever just entered the room.
The sound of a cell door opening fills the room, and whoever opened it kicks your leg.
“Up,” a deep voice commands.
Not wanting to get kicked or choked again, you place your hands on the floor and extend your arms.
You slowly rise to your feet, despite the desperate cries from your back pleading with you to stop moving and lie down again.
You turn to face two zebra guards, gesturing for you to follow them. You look back to Daring, who mouths “It’s OK” as you walk down the hallway and into the next room without confrontation.
==========
You have been strapped to a chair.
At Daring’s request, you did not attempt to assault your captors in any way. You have not said anything since they got you, and have made no movements other than the ones they instructed you to make.
The chair you’re on is in the same room you were in yesterday, though now, there is no table. Just a chair sitting in the middle of the room. Same dirt floors, dirt walls, a few torches to light the room, and the same strange, militaristic decorations.
Your ankles are bound to the chair’s front two legs, and you have handcuffs attached to your wrists, but your hands are not behind you. They are resting in your lap.
It is awfully trusting of them to allow you the use of your hands. You could attempt to get out, but Daring said not to, and you trust her.
So, if you are going to attempt an escape, you’ll have to take the chair with you.
The door in front of you opens, and in walks a zebra. But not one the ordinary, naked zebras. And not Kiduttaa, either. This pony is wearing rings around his neck and legs, has some sort of headdress on, and has facepaint.
The rings he has are golden, and reflect the light from the fires very brightly.
The headdress is just a simple head covering with white feathers with red stripes sticking straight up out of it like the crest of a centurion’s helmet.
His face paint is blue, easily seen on his black and white fur. There doesn’t seem to be a pattern with the paint, though, as there are random lines and loops all over him.
He approaches you slowly, maintaining eye contact the entire time. His eyes are golden.
He has a tray on his back.
“Good morning,” he greets evenly, not showing any emotion thus far. He walks towards you, stops, gets the tray off of his back with his teeth, and sets it on the dirt floor in front of you.
“Tea?” he asks.
This is strange.
Just yesterday, you were being interrogated and tortured by some psychopath. You have the scars to prove it, and they’re probably going to be there for the rest of your life. You expected to be brought back in here for another round of the “tell me where the elephant is while I rip you apart” game you played yesterday.
But you’re not playing that anymore.
“Uhm... yes. Please.” You respond, trying not to sound confused.
He picks up the kettle in his teeth and pours tea into a small cup. He fills it up before placing the kettle back on the tray.
“Sugar? Cream?” he asks.
Your confusion is still growing.
“Please,” you respond.
He places some sugar, cream, and a spoon in your cup. He gestures to your cup on the floor, and you hesitantly lean forward to pick it up.
You expected he would splash the hot tea on your face and start cutting you up, but no such thing happens.
You pick up the tea and stir its’ contents.
He pours and prepares his own cup.
“I apologize for the behavior of my subordinates,” he says before taking a sip of his tea. He lets out a satisfied ‘Ahh’ upon completion of the sip. “Please, drink, drink.”
You take a quick gulp of the tea, regretting how fast you drank it. It’s awfully hot, and burns your throat.
He begins. “My subordinate, Kiduttaa, has used some unconventional tactics in order to procure some information from you, and for that, I offer my sincerest apologies.”
He puts his cup of tea back on the ground.
“That worthless zebra has ruined my ravenwood table with his sick games! Ravenwood is hard to come by, you know. That was my table he was using, and he got blood all over it!” He takes a deep breath. “He best be praying to the gods that it does not stain, or he shall suffer the consequences.”
That’s why this guy is upset? Because I bled on his table?
You first thought that this blue-faced zebra in front of you was sane. Normal. Much kinder than Kiduttaa.
But apparently not, if the only reason he is upset is because you bleed when cut.
Is everyone here psychotic?
“My name is Valheita,” he informs you. “Contrary to what Kiduttaa may have told you, I am the one in charge around here. He is a subordinate of mine, who feverishly enjoys enacting his sick fantasies. But do not worry. He will not be attending our little meeting.”
He picks up his tea, takes a sip, and places it back down on the tray.
“Can I get you something to eat? Some crackers? Or something more substantial?”
What the hell is going on here?
“Uhm, no.” You respond. “No thank you.”
“Oh! Please forgive me.” He grabs a small key off the tray with his teeth and moves it towards your handcuffs. You stick out both of your hands slightly without a second thought.
He sticks the key in one cuff and unlocks it, before doing the same to the other. Your handcuffs fall to the ground.
“Almost...”
He bends down and unlocks the chains around your ankles that attach to the chair.
You have a sudden urge to beat the zebra to death. It wouldn’t even be that hard. You punched a zebra just the other day right in the face and you definitely felt some bones crack. The zebra’s face is perfectly eye level with your feet, which you could easily put in his teeth.
There are even weapons all over the walls! It’s like this guy is asking you to kill him!
All you would have to do is stand up, take a step or two in any direction, extend a hand, grab any weapon from the wall, and swing.
And all your problems may end.
But Daring said not to. For whatever reason, she told you not to fight back. This situation may be an exception, but you would hate to ruin Daring’s plan.
She should have told you her plan. Then you’d know what to do.
“Do you mind if we discuss Ms. Do?” Valheita asks.
You don’t see why not. You’re not supposed to kill this guy, so you may as well talk to him.
“Sure,” you say before taking a sip of your tea.
“How did you two meet?”
“She found me in the forest.” This guy is being nice, so you might as well tell the truth. At least on matters that have no significance, like this.
“Oh? What were you doing in the forest?”
“I don’t know. I got lost.”
“Interesting. What do you know about Ms. Do?”
You think for a moment. “Nothing, really. We only knew each other for a day before we were brought here.”
“That is a great shame. A great shame, indeed.” He looks down before taking a contemplative sip from his cup.
That confused you. “Why do you say that?”
“Hmm?” He looks back up to you. “Oh, sorry. You mustn’t know very much about Ms. Do if you only met her yesterday, so you probably don’t know how she works.”
“How she works?”
“I swear, everytime I hear about Ms. Do she is travelling around with some new poor soul.”
Poor soul?
“She’s a notorious graverobber, but she rarely does so alone. She is, more often than not, dragging someone along with her.”
“Why?” you ask.
“Well she’s using them, of course!” he chuckles. “My friend, why do you think you are travelling along with her?”
“Well, I needed her help...” you say after a moment of recollecting.
“So you needed her help, and she decided to help you?”
“I saved her life. And she promised to help me get home.”
He laughs. “Of course. Of course!” He points at the closed door at the end of the room. “The world’s most notorious, disreputable, shadiest graverobber agreed to help you get back home? Because you helped her once?” He laughs again. He laughs very hard.
What’s so funny?
“I know you just met her, and must think she is an outstanding mare, but such assumptions are false.”
You don’t say anything. He has your attention now, as he questions Daring’s true motives for helping you.
“I seem to recall a gryphon, just a year ago, who was helping Ms. Do trying to get a very valuable artifact from some temple that was buried in a sandstorm in a desert hundreds of years ago. From what I heard, Daring and the gryphon went into the desert, and only Daring came out, thousands of bits richer than she was before.”
That doesn’t prove anything.
“And I heard this one, where Ms. Do was travelling with another pegasus to some tropical island. There was apparently some magical stone out there, or something of that nature. I’m not sure what they were looking for exactly because that does not interest me. What does interest me, however, is that Daring and the pegasus went to the island, but only Ms. Do left.”
“...”
“Are you seeing a pattern?”
You think you are.
Daring does a lot of treasure hunting.
“Every time she teams up with someone, she just uses them long enough so that they can help her get what she wants, then she ditches them. Happens every time.”
“Why are you telling me this?” you ask, confused and frustrated, unable to tell if this guy is lying to you. Somepony is lying to you, but you’re not sure who!
“I will not pretend that your unfortunate situation troubles me, for it does not.” This guy seems pretty honest. “However, you have some information about a certain artifact that I would love to have.”
He gets up, strolls to the corner of the room where a bag is sitting, and pulls out the red donkey you saw yesterday.
“This donkey, along with the blue elephant you have in your possession, is very important to me and my people. They are...” He thinks for a moment before smiling. “Religious artifacts, let’s say, and we want them back.”
Daring told you the elephant, donkey, and eagle have some magic capabilities, which didn’t make any sense to you, and still does not, but you have a feeling that you should not give him the idol. You have a bad feeling about giving him such a valued treasure.
“Kiduttaa and I often don’t see eye-to-eye on most situations, as you may know.”
You do know. Kiduttaa would not unchain you and serve you tea while having a relatively peaceful, non-stressful conversation.
“However, we are both in agreement on one thing: You have the Elephant of Norsu. Don’t you?”
You almost say “Yes,” but manage to stop yourself before you do.
“I will reward you very generously for the Elephant. All I need is the location, and I shall grant you your freedom, a map to travel to a more civilized location, and enough bits to retire, even at your young age.”
You want to trust this guy. Your brain is screaming at you to give him the idol so you can get that money and map and go home.
But your gut is telling you not to. Something just doesn’t feel right to you.
Where the hell is Daring?!
You’re beginning to feel that she has abandoned you. She should have been here long ago. It’s been more than two minutes. Maybe this guy is right? Daring was just using you? She probably broke out and already left.
“All we require is the location. Just tell me where-”
He is interrupted by the door slamming open and a zebra falling into the room.
“What the-”
He is interrupted once more as a yellow pegasus literally flies into the room and tackles him to the ground.
Daring, wearing her bloodstained shirt, pith helmet, and now having a fresh scar under her eye, lands on top of Valheita.
She raises a hoof to strike him in the face, but Valheita hits her in the stomach and grabs her wing, pulling her off to one side.
Realizing that Daring has not abandoned you, you get up to extract a weapon off the wall. The first thing you see is the crossbow, which you grab.
Before loading it, you notice the zebra by the door groan as he begins to rise to his hooves.
Not having the crossbow loaded, you turn it around and shove the butt of it into the zebras face as fast and as hard as you can.
His head recoils, bounces off the ground, and his body settles into a supine position. Some blood is coming out of his nose and slightly ajar mouth. He does not move again.
Daring and Valheita continue to wrestle on the ground, exchanging punches and jabs and rolling on the ground.
You pull the bow back until it locks into place before grabbing an arrow off the wall.
“Stop!” you yell, pointing the crossbow at both Daring and Valheita.
Valheita bucks Daring off of him before they both turn their attention towards you.
You take aim at Valheita.
“Listen to me!” the zebra pleads, quickly rising to his hooves. “Everything I told you earlier was the truth!”
You glance at Daring, who looks confused, and perhaps a little nervous.
“She’s just using you!” Valheita shouts. “The thief!”
“What?!” Daring gasps.
“Look,” he continues to reason with you, “You have the chance to save my zebras! You have the chance to go home! Now! All you have to do is shoot her! She’s just using you!”
“What?!” Daring yells in shock, backing away from you. “N-No! I would never-”
“Shoot her!”
“Don’t listen to him! He’s just pretending to be nice to you!”
“Shoot her!”
Valheita is slowly inching his way towards the strangely decorated wall.
You have a very important decision to make, which must be made in the next few seconds... So...
Who are you going to trust? Daring, who has stuck with you and has not harmed you in any way whatsoever? Or Valheita, who had a subordinate cut up your back so he could find a statue?
Tough decision.
You squeeze the trigger and the arrow flies straight at your target.
The arrow pierces right through Valheita’s throat.
He reaches a hoof up to his neck as though to stop the blood from spurting from his open wound, but it is in vain.
He gurgles and stumbles around the room for a few seconds before hitting the wall. His eyes go wide as he takes one last breath and slides down to the floor, his eyes wide open.
He’s dead.
You killed him.
You’ve never really had such a strong urge to kill something. At least, not that you can remember. But if there is one being you would not mind shooting in the neck with an arrow, it is Kiduttaa.
But he’s not here.
“I-I thought you were going to shoot me,” Daring says, her voice shaking.
You almost smile. “You’re the only friend I got, Daring. Why would I shoot you?”
“H-How did you know he was lying?”
You shrug and hang the crossbow back up on the wall. “I didn’t. I just figured you were telling the truth.”
The ‘Good Cop-Bad Cop routine Valheita and Kiduttaa had going almost worked on you.
She smiles at you. A big, happy, toothy grin. “Heh heh,” she chuckles, beginning to move towards the open door where an unconscious zebra still remains. “Let’s get out of here before anymore guards come.”
“Alright,” you say, beginning to follow her before you remember something. “Wait, Daring!”
She turns back to face you. “What? Let’s go!”
“No, no, look!” You quick walk over to the saddlebags still on the floor in the corner of the room. You open the bag and extract a bag of coins.
“What’s that?” Daring asks.
That’s not what you meant to pull out, but you might as well check inside.
Opening the bag, you pull out a handful of golden coins.
“What are these?” you ask Daring with a raised eyebrow.
“Let me see that!” Daring almost shouts, snatching the bag out of your hands. “No way! Look at all these bits! These are all 100 bit pieces!” She tosses the bag back in forth between her hooves. “There have to be at least 3,000 bits in this bag!”
“That’s not all!” you exclaim, reaching into the bag to grab what you actually want to find. “For you!” You hold up the red donkey.
“The Donkey of Tissit!” Daring shouts, her eyes wide, grabbing it from your hands the moment you hold it up.
Once she has it in her grasp, she brings it to her face, carefully observing it. Probably to make sure it’s not a fake.
“Ha ha! And it’s real! It’s real! Ohmygosh Ohmygosh Ohmygosh!”
Daring squeals in happiness and literally jumps towards you.
Reacting naturally, you extend your arms and catch her, wrapping an arm around her midsection. She proceeds to wrap her hind legs around your waist and a foreleg around your neck in order to hold herself up.
Your face heats up at the sudden close contact.
“Ha ha! Look at it!” she exclaims, holding up the red donkey in her free hoof in front of your eyes. “We got it! You got it! This is so awesome! Do you know how much time you’ve just saved us?!”
You don’t know, but considering Daring’s reaction, it must be a lot.
“I can’t believe they already had it!”
“They had it, but now it’s ours.”
“Ha ha! Suckers!” She jumps out of your grasp and walks over to the dead zebra. She places the donkey in front of his face, as though he can see it. “Suck it Valheita! Ya psychopathic bastard!”
You pick up the bag of bits that Daring dropped when she saw the donkey and put it in your pocket. Daring said there must be 3,000 bits in the bag. You don’t know what means, but considering how excited she got, it probably has some importance.
“Now we got your idol AND your money!” She kicks his body. “How did you know he had it?”
“Kiduttaa showed it to me while he had a hook in my back.”
Her smile drops, and you regret being honest. You should’ve said something else.
“Thank you,” she says.
“For what?”
“Having faith in me. Not giving in. Not telling them anything about me. Having Kiduttaa... you know... I know I was asking a lot, so thank you.”
“It’s no problem, Do. I should be thanking you.”
She looks at you, quirking an eyebrow. “What? Why?”
“You kept your word. You said you would come back for me, and you did. For a while there, I thought you bust out and left me here.”
Valheita was a pretty convincing liar.
“Never!” she asks, her smile returning. “I’m loyal to the end!”
“And it looks like you’ve proven that.”
“Well, two down. One to go.”
One to go.
“And I found a map,” Daring continues. “There’s a city a dozen or so miles north of here. If we hurry, we can make it before dark. And with all these bits, we can even stay in a nice hotel! Instead of sleeping outside or in a cramped cell.”
You nod. “Alright, let’s go.”
Daring turns and walks out of the room.
Before you leave, you see your bloodstained shirt crumpled up in the back of the room. You rush over, put on the disgusting thing, and hurry to catch up with Daring.
After a full day of walking through the humid, unnamed jungle, the both of you reached the outskirts of a large, bright, populated city. The city is comprised of a pleasant mix of zebras, ponies, camels, and flying bird-lion things (Or whatever they’re called, you didn’t ask), among other things.
The sight was not surprising. The only creatures you have seen in the past couple days have been talking animals, so a giant city full of them seems legit.
You walk through the city as the sun was just barely hovering over the horizon, about to set. Seeing this, and bordering on starving, you begin conversation once again with Daring.
“Should we stop for the night?” you ask, gesturing to a small motel on the side of the road. The sides of the roads are lined with small stores and stands with small animals trying to sell various trinkets and vegetables and whatnot. “I’m exhausted.” You stomach grumbles loudly and painfully. “And hungry. Those zebras only gave me a cup of tea.”
But it was good tea.
“No way!” Daring shouts, almost shocked by your recommendation to stop and not die of exhaustion or starvation. She pulls out the bag of bits you stole that morning and jingles it in her hoof. “There are thousands of bits in this bag,” she continues quietly, not wanting any fellow pedestrians to overhear, ignoring the fact that she took out the bag and is shaking it for all to see in the first place. “We don’t need to stay in some shit motel and eat disgusting peasant food that’ll give us the trots.”
“Then where are we going?”
“The ‘Vakaa’! One of the most famous hotels in the world!”
“Never heard of it.”
Why can’t anything be in English?
She rolls her eyes. “Yeah, I know. But trust me, it’s a ridiculously nice hotel. Princess Celestia stayed there on vacation once, so if it’s fit for royalty, it’s gotta be alright for us.”
“Yeah, ‘cause we’re royalty, right? Why not just stay in a motel?” Your stomach growls in anger at not receiving food in hours. “It’s convenient. And I’m hungry.”
“We’ll eat at the hotel. It’s a five star hotel, with five star dining. Do you know how many stars that is?” She turns her head to look you in the eyes, continuing to walk. “That’s all the stars. All.”
“All?”
“All.”
“Gee, Daring. It’s tough to argue with all those stars,” you say sarcastically. “But you’re right. It’s a good thing we are in such a friendly place, too, right? There definitely weren’t any zebras yesterday trying to carve me up like a pumpkin so they could find an elephant statue. And there definitely aren’t-”
“OK! OK!” Daring cuts you off. “I got it. But don’t worry. Anypony you meet in the forest is bound to be creepy or psychotic.”
“I met you in the forest.”
“Besides me, dummy,” she waves a dismissive forehoof.
“Besides you,” you breathe.
The streets are paved nicely and there are miniature creatures milling about all over the place, on the sidewalks and on the street and high above your head.
The rest of the long walk is made in relative silence, only broken when Daring wants to point something out or explain something to you.
==========
The hotel lobby is breathtaking. The air is cool and refreshing, offering a pleasant relief from the hot air of the world outside.
The lobby is extraordinarily large. The ceiling is high above your head; 20 or 30 feet at least! It’s way more spacious than the claustrophobic, cramped spaces in the jungle. And the ceiling is even painted!
The crowded room is packed with various well-dressed creatures, most of whom are probably the hotel staff.
You just now notice that every living being that is capable of doing so is looking right at you. And Daring. Who is completely oblivious to her surroundings.
Daring is wearing the biggest smile you have ever seen as she glances around excitedly, clearly excited at being able to sleep inside.
Wondering why everyone has stopped to stare at the both of you, you suddenly remember what you have been doing the past couple of days.
The both of you smell awful, are covered in sweat, look exhausted and probably on the verge of death, and are wearing clothes soaked in blood.
“I’mma see if they got a room open. ‘K?” Daring asks, looking up at you with a smile.
“Uh, yeah. You do that,” you respond, still gazing around at all of those staring back at you. “And do it quickly,” you add, but Daring is already out of earshot.
In an attempt to distract yourself from the strangers around you, you look around.
The lobby sparkles brightly, everything spotless. The floors, the walls, the giant chandelier hanging from the ceiling in the middle of the room, and even the various small busts of unknown ponies and animals that line the room.
No wonder this place has 5 stars. The lobby is made of gold!
At least, it seems that way, especially after you spent the last few days in hell.
“Hey!” Daring exclaims, popping up next to you. “We got a room with a nice view on the 15th floor! This is gonna be so awesome!” She tosses a golden key up in the air, which you catch and put into your pocket.
Everyone is still looking at you as they slowly begin to return to their duties. “Yeah, that’s great Daring, what d’ya say about heading up? Now.”
She laughs. “Alright! Let’s do it! Oh! And get this, the guy at the counter offered to wash our clothes for free! Ha! I love this place!”
“Yeah it’s great,” you say, speed walking towards the elevators.
==========
After taking the crowded elevator up 15 stories, you arrive at your desired floor.
Taking a left and going down the long, luxuriously decorated hallway, you move towards room 1556 with Daring literally bouncing next to you.
She looks around. “If this is what the halls look like, just imagine what the room is like!” She squees excitedly.
You smile, seeing how happy she is. For whatever reason, her happiness is rubbing off on you.
“You seem excited,” you calmly observe.
“You bet! Usually I’m sleeping in a cave or on the ground or in a tree or something. But just look at this place!” She jumps into the air, turning her body a complete 360 degrees. “Fit for royalty!”
Coming up to the room on your right, you remove the assigned key from your pocket and stick it into the door. Turning it all the way to the right, you hear a click, turn the handle, and push it open.
Before you can set a foot inside the dark room, Daring literally flies past you.
“Ha ha!” She laughs from inside. “Just look at this place! Oh my gosh! Get in here, already!”
You take your first steps into the cool room, briefly relishing in the fresh, cold air the hotel provides. It feels much better than the humid atmosphere outside the building.
Taking a few steps through the small hallway, you pass the door to the bathroom and reach the main room...
Where you see Daring hopping from place to place in excitement.
In the large room, there is a small kitchen area with a polished counter, a sink, a microwave, a stove, a refrigerator, and various cabinets.
Next to the kitchen area sits a large table, assumingly used for eating with whomever one shares their room with. Above the table, an elaborate chandelier hangs down from the ceiling and glows brightly, easily lighting the room.
At the far end of the long room, sits one queen sized bed.
One.
And on that bed, Daring is bouncing up and down and glancing around, her eyes not coming to rest on one thing for longer than a second or two.
You have to admit, this is the nicest hotel you’ve ever been to.
Well, it probably is, at least. You can’t exactly remember anything involving fancy hotels, but this seems fantastic!
At the far end of the room, behind the bed, are glass doors that lead out to a balcony, sitting high above the city. Taking a moment to peek out there, you see the city far below you, and see miles in the distance.
The hotel is easily one of the tallest buildings in this city, which is great for you because you can see everything. In the direction you’re facing out of, you can see the jungle that you and Daring recently emerged from.
“Look at that! Look at that!” Daring yells, jumping next to you and pointing a hoof out the doors.
You chuckle. “Yes, Daring, I see it.”
Your stomach rumbles, and Daring stops her bouncing.
“Hungry?” she asks smiling.
“Yes. Feed me.”
She laughs and turns around, walking to the table. “I told you I would, and I’m gonna do it.” She picks up a small leather-bound book with her teeth and tosses it to you. You catch it and open to the first page.
Room Service
Ooh! Food!
You were unaware that this hotel had room service, but you are very grateful for it. You’re too tired to actually leave the hotel room and go get something yourself, so to have someone deliver you food sounds great.
“You want anything from room service?” Daring asks, jingling the bag of gold coins in her hoof. “I’m buying!” She laughs.
You scan the menu rapidly, eager to find something you think you’ll like. “Oh, I’m starving!... No offense, but those berries you got the other day sucked.”
She scoffs. “Well duh! What did you expect from me? A gourmet meal? We were in the middle of the jungle.”
After a few moments of scanning the page, you see they offer steak. A really expensive steak.
You hear hoofsteps on the floor.
“Hey,” Daring calls, getting your attention. “I saw a drugstore on the way here. I’m gonna pick up some supplies right quick, so you can order dinner. Get me the house salad and we’ll split a bottle of wine. I should be back by the time they deliver it. Oh! And here’s the money.”
She tosses you the bag of golden coins.
The way the steak is described on the menu sounds very appetizing, and your stomach is urging you to get that.
“Hey Daring, can I get the steak?”
She stops walking and looks at the wall. She just looks at it, as though she is thinking of something. Before you can ask her what’s wrong, she turns back to you.
“You kidding? After all you’ve done for me? Hell! Get five steaks! Get whatever you want!”
She smiles back at you and pauses for a moment, not moving. You return the smile, and after a few seconds of silence, she turns and leaves.
==========
Almost an hour after placing your order, the food finally arrives. It was a long time to wait, but you can’t rush perfection, and your steak is perfection.
Despite Daring’s offer, you only got one, as opposed to five. It was tempting to get five, as you were very hungry, but looking at your food now, you’re glad you only got the one.
On the tray sits a massive steak, almost the size of the plate itself. Around the steak is a generous amount of mashed potatoes and green beans.
In addition to the delicious smelling meat and vegetables on your tray is a very large bottle of wine, and you fill your glass.
Daring came back to the room a few seconds before the food was delivered, as she said she would, and recommended the both of you eat outside in order to feel the cool afternoon air and watch the sunset.
And that is where you are now; sitting on the balcony, relaxing into your chair and eating off the small outdoor table with Daring across from you, nibbling on her massive salad.
She also brought back multiple bags of... something. You’re not sure what she got, but as long as she knows what they are, you don’t have to.
Cutting into your steak as the sun descends for the first and last time today, some strange idea comes to your mind which you feel the need to discuss.
“Hey Daring?” you ask, getting her attention. Her red eyes connect with yours as she looks up from her salad, a piece of lettuce stuck to her chin. “Uh... You got something... right here...” You point a finger at your face.
She rubs a hoof over her chin, removing the piece of lettuce. Her cheeks flush red as she puts the leaf back onto her plate.
“Thanks,” she says.
“No problem. Anyway, I got a question.”
“Shoot.”
“Is this what you do for a living?”
“What? Eating?” She takes a bite from her salad.
“No, no. This whole, uh, ‘treasure hunting’ thing.”
“No, actually. Well, not entirely. See, I’m a professor at Hoofvard University.”
You suddenly get the feeling that a terrible pun has been made. But that just leads you back to what you were thinking earlier.
“Alright,” you begin, “let me guess... The university pays you to get these artifacts so they can study them, and then donate them to a museum?”
“No...” she says slowly. “I am paid by Princess Celestia to get them. The Equestrian government funds all these adventures I go on... What was all that about the university and a museum?”
“Just from a movie I saw once.”
“Really?” she asks.
You nod.
“That’s awesome!”
You nod again, taking a sip from your drink. “Yeah, it was a great movie. A classic.”
“No! No! Not that! You’re remembering!”
I am?
“I am?”
You gasp.
“Holy shit! I am!” Your heart beats faster and faster as you begin to feel very excited. “Ask me something else! Ask me something else!”
“OK! Uhm... What’s your name?”
“I don’t know.” Your smile falls. “I don’t know.”
You suddenly feel very depressed.
“I don’t know.” You put your head in your hands.
You feel a hoof on your shoulder.
“Hey,” Daring says soothingly. “It’s alright. Don’t beat yourself up. You just gotta take this one step at a time. It’s great that you remembered that movie!”
“Yeah,” you sigh. “I guess... Can’t remember the name of it, though.”
She puts a hoof under your chin and forces you to look up at her. “Like I said, one step at a time.”
The two of you eat your meals as the sun sets.
==========
After completing dinner, you place your empty trays and bottle outside the door, as the maid service will be around later to pick it up.
Daring instructed you to remove your stained shirt and lay on the bed, much to your confusion. Your perverse mind begins coming up with all kinds of scenarios of why Daring would tell you to do such a thing.
Despite your confusion, you obey her command, discarding your shirt, and only your shirt, before laying face-down on the mattress.
You close your eyes and wait.
After a few short moments, Daring joins you on the mattress, hopping up and walking towards where you lay.
Your face heats up as you feel Daring straddle your rump. Before you can stammer out a question, she speaks.
“Now, this gonna sting real bad, but it’ll help,” she says, uncapping some bottle with an audible ‘click.’ You cannot see what the bottle is, though.
“What are you doing?” you ask, wiggling yourself into a more comfortable position, adjusting the unexpected weight on your backside.
“I picked this up at the drugstore. Ah! Will you stop moving? I’m going to fall off. “
“Sorry.”
“It’s all good. This’ll keep your wounds from getting infected, I think.”
“You think?”
“I think. I’m a professor of archaeology, not a doctor.”
Grabbing onto the sheets, you brace yourself for the possible incoming pain.
The first few drops of liquid fall from the bottle and onto your back, which stings a little, but it’s not bad. More drops of the liquid are distributed across your back, stinging and partially numbing your extremity.
You hear the top of the bottle close once more before Daring sets it aside.
“Alright... this is gonna hurt,” she says honestly. Her truthfulness is astounding.
Before you can respond, her hooves push the liquid into your recent wounds.
You bite your lip hard, muffling a cry of pain and tuck your chin into your chest.
Daring was right about the stinging you should be feeling. It is most unpleasant, and the feeling spreads to the far reaches of all your limbs, tingling your fingers and toes. Your grip on the sheets becomes tighter and tighter before your back begins to numb, and the unpleasantness you feel slowly begins to fade.
Wanting to distract yourself from the unpleasant burning sensation in your back, you try to start up conversation.
“What was it you said about being a teacher?” you ask, your voice strained and your eyes shut tightly.
“No. Not teacher. ‘Professor.’ I’m a professor. I get paid more than teachers, I have more expertise than teachers, and I am way smarter than some ‘teacher’.”
“Sorry. Didn’t know you felt so strongly about it.” You resist the urge to roll over.
“Nah. Didn’t mean to sound so mean about it. I actually haven’t been to school since I was six.”
That surprises you. “And you’re a professor?”
“Yep!” She exclaims, probably with a big smile on her face. “A gal who didn’t finish elementary school is teaching snot-nosed college brats about shit they don’t care about. And I’m doing it at a school I’d never be able to get into. Hell, if I didn’t teach there, they probably wouldn’t even let me on campus!” She chuckles at her own joke.
She continues to rub her soft hooves over your back. The massage has the potential to be euphoric and relaxing were it not for the burning.
She continues. “All the stallions just stare at my flank and drool like morons. So the mares stare at the stallions and the stallions stare at me... kids, I swear. I put my heart into teaching, but most ponies take it as a joke.”
“But not you.”
“Oh hay no! I love teaching and I love being here! Deserts and jungles? Now that’s my true home.”
“So you’re a professor and an adventurer?”
“Yep!” She proclaims proudly. “But that’s not all!”
“What else could there possibly be?”
“I’m a writer!”
“... a writer?”
“Mm-hmm. Make a lot of money off that too.”
“How? You just said you never finished elementary school. And your speech is tantamount to that of a toothless hobo.”
“Hey!”
“How could you write a book? And who in their right mind would read it?”
She chuckles. “You kidding? Everypony who’s anypony reads my books! All of Equestria knows me.”
“Which brings me back to my first question: How are you writing books if you’ve never learned to read?”
She scoffs. “I know how to read, smartass. Hey! There’s an idea! You can’t remember your name, so maybe I should call you ‘Smartass!’”
You both share a brief laugh, despite the pain you’re in.
She continues. “I don’t actually write the books. I tell my adventures to a very good friend of mine who knows how to keep a secret, and she writes the books for me. But I help her write them!”
“So everypony knows about you, then?”
“You bet!”
You doubt Daring’s story. The chances of her being a famous writer, professor, and adventurer are little to none. But you play along anyway.
“Then are paparazzi around you all the time? How do you do these secret missions if everyone is always trying to get pictures of you?”
“‘Daring Do’ is my birth name. But I use a fake name when I teach and at social events and such, so no one knows who I really am. Everypony thinks that ‘Daring Do’ is just based on me, because I look like her. But I actually am her!”
You sneeze.
“Gesundheit.”
“Thanks.”
“All the books in the ‘Daring Do’ series are adventure books. And most of the things that happen to me are so crazy that everypony just assumes it’s fiction. For example, what are the chances of me meeting you in the middle of some jungle? It sounds like fiction to me.”
“But it’s not.”
“I know it! But that’s good. If everypony knew who I was, I’d never get anything done.”
You think for a second. “So is this particular adventure going to be turned into a book?”
“Eh...” she thinks, her rubbing of your back slowing slightly. “Maybe... It depends on how it all plays out.”
“What do you mean?”
“... nothing...”
You leave it at that.
==========
“You’re lucky, you know,” Daring says as her hooves continue to trace over your back.
“In what way?” you ask, still flinching slightly at the sudden jolts of pain you feel. Thankfully, now your back is beginning to get numb, so you feel less and less.
“He used a clean knife.”
“He used a hook,” you correct.
“He used a clean hook.”
You suppose that does make you lucky.
==========
The rest of the ‘massage’ was spent in tremendous pain. If you didn’t have any scars on your back then it would’ve been the most relaxing experience that your 3-day old memory would have, but you did, so it was painful and terrible.
Just like everything else you can remember. You don’t think one single memory in your brain is a pleasant one, as the last few days have sucked a big one, but it’s getting better.
Once the liquid soaked in, Daring wrapped you up in gauze, which covers your back wounds and wraps around your chest. It’s not much, but you’re already feeling better.
Now the two of you are sitting outside once more, observing the nightlife of the city far below.
“Isn’t that beautiful?” she asks, looking up.
“What? The ceiling?”
“Tch. No. The stars.” She points a hoof towards the sky.
You look up and see the night sky. You suppose it is rather pretty.
“I guess it is,” you respond.
“It’s awesome, really. I’ve been all over the world, but no matter where I go, the sky is the same. The stars are always in the same place. It reminds me of Equestria.”
You feel homesick. Despite not knowing where home is exactly, you do know you really want to go back, and having Daring talk about it isn’t helping much.
“What’s your family like, Daring?” you ask, curious.
“Wh-What?” she stammers, looking at you. “Why?”
You shrug. “No reason, I guess. Just wondering what they thought about you going on all these secret adventures.”
“That all?”
“That, and I can’t remember my family, so I guess it’d be nice to hear about yours’.”
“Uh...” She seems reluctant to tell you anything. You actually don’t know anything about Daring’s personal life. Sure, you know how she makes a living, but that’s basically it. “I don’t think you’ll want to hear about it.”
“Well sure I do.”
“I’ve never actually told anypony before.”
“Told anyone what?” you ask, curiosity getting the best of you.
“I’m an orphan.”
There is a moment of silence.
Daring just looks over the city, no readable expression on her face.
You look at Daring, certainly not expecting that she was an orphan.
She continues. “I was never adopted... See, when I was a filly, I had a bad habit of running off; running away from the orphanage. It’s not like there was anything wrong with the place, it just wasn’t for me, you know?”
You don’t know.
“That eventually leads to how I got my cutie mark, but that’s a longer story.”
She looks over at you, and you continue to look at her.
“I’ll tell you the story later, if you want to hear it. It’s just late...” She takes a deep breath. “Welp, better get ready for bed.”
She gets up, slides the glass door open, and walks inside.
You don’t know what to do. Should you follow her? Should you stay put? She doesn’t seem to want to talk about it, and you certainly don’t want to force her to.
You get up and go inside anyway, at least just to make sure she’s alright.
Daring is pacing around the room, moving bags and putting some things in the refrigerator.
“I never had a family...” she says. She does not appear to be talking to you, but you suppose she is, as you are the only sentient being in the room.
You don’t say a word, but you don’t have to, as she continues to talk as though she is speaking to an audience.
“My ‘parents’, I suppose you could call ‘em, left me outside at the front door of an orphanage in Fillydelphia,” she says walking around the room, unable to stay in one place for longer than a second or two.
You don’t say anything. You just listen and take a seat on the bed, allowing her to continue speaking.
She chuckles dryly to herself. “The doorstep...” She smiles a little and looks down. “The doorstep...”
She stops moving. You can tell she’s getting more emotional about this.
“They didn’t even have the decency to walk inside...” She sniffles. “They couldn’t even show their pathetic faces. They just left me. Outside.”
She spins around, glaring at everything around her.
“Why am I an orphan?!” She shouts, asking no one in particular. “Why me?! The two ponies that chose to have me and carry me for months just decide to give me up? Like I’m some piece of trash?!”
You swear you see smoke come out of her nostrils as her breathing gets heavier.
“Why does everypony else get a family? Huh?! How come I didn’t get one?!” She kicks the wall hard, making a small hole. “What kind of worthless piles of crap do my parents have to be to do that?!”
You stand up.
Before you can make your way over to Daring, she kicks the wall again in the same spot as before and begins knocking over whatever she sees.
“How worthless am I that my parents didn’t even want me when I was only a few days old?!”
You can’t answer any of these questions.
She grabs the lamp next to your bed with her forehooves and smashes it against the wall, causing it to shatter and break into dozens of pieces and scatter across the floor.
Before she can cause anymore mayhem, you grab onto her midsection tightly.
“Let me go!” she shouts, kicking and flailing in your arms.
You try to shush and calm her down, but it’s hardly working.
“Let me go!” She kicks your thigh very hard, causing you to grunt, but you don’t let go. “Get off me-e!” Her voice cracks, and the tears begin to fall.
You grab her tighter as she begins flapping her wings to propel herself away from you.
“G-Get off me...” she whispers, her voice continuing to break.
She buries her face in your shoulder and sobs, her voice breaking and cracking, her breath quick and uncontrollable, and her tears falling onto your shoulder.
Her wings fall limply to her sides and her muscles relax, except for her forelegs, which she wraps around your neck.
You sit down on the bed with Daring in your lap, move a hand to rub her back consolingly, and gently rock back and forth.
==========
Written by- ScatMan2001
Edited by- A Renegade Time Lord
That's right, I have an editor now. And we are unstoppable!
Daring has been in the shower for quite some time now.
After her little “episode,” she quietly excused herself, went into the restroom, and has been there ever since.
The average shower does not last 45 minutes, so you’re not entirely sure what she’s doing in there. You would be more concerned about her, but she has proven that she can handle herself multiple times in the past few days.
This was a just a slight moment of weakness, and now you have learned not to mention the words “parents” or “family” to Daring. Which should be easy, considering you can’t remember your own anyway.
You have been waiting for her to come out for a long time. You ordered some dessert from room service as you were waiting. Your chocolate cake has been devoured, and you got a piece for Daring too, which you put in the fridge.
Fed up with waiting in silence and boredom, you decide to take a small tour of your luxurious hotel room.
After doing a complete 360 degree turn, you’ve seen it all, and are bored once more. Luckily, Daring bought some magazines from that drug store she went to earlier, so you may as well read. Maybe that’ll help you remember something.
You walk over to the table where Daring’s bags still lie and open them. You grab the contents of the bag, take them over to the counter, and attempt to decide between three magazines.
There is “Cosmoponytan”, “Global Geographic,” or “Mare’s World.”
None of them seem appealing in the slightest.
The cover of “Cosmoponytan” magazine has a beautiful picture of a tall, white unicorn with three anchors tattooed on her butt.
The cover of “Global Geographic” has a picture of some desert on it. As interesting as sand can be, you pass.
And “Mare’s World” has a picture of some mare yelling at some stallion. You’re not sure why she’s shouting, but don’t have the will to find out.
Grabbing “Cosmoponytan” magazine off the table, you flop onto your bed and open it, trying to find an article worthy of your attention.
You see another picture of the white unicorn from the cover in this particular article, so you think you may as well read this one.
Glancing back to the bathroom door, and seeing that nothing has changed in the past 45 minutes and probably won’t for a while, you begin to read.
==========
Once you have finally immersed yourself in the daily lives of high class fashion stars in a land known as “Equestria,” you hear a knock on the door.
Whaaaat?! You groan mentally, perhaps enjoying the magazine more than a man should.
You gently place the magazine face down on the table as to save your place so you may continue as soon as possible. You really want to know all about Fleur and her supposed affair.
Standing up and rolling your eyes, you trudge on over to the door.
Who could possibly be there? You don’t know anyone besides Daring. And Kiduttaa. But what are the chances of that psychopath finding you?
Slim, you think. And if what Daring told you about him was true, then he is probably a wanted criminal, hence why he was living in the forest. You doubt he’d be able to show his face in such a large city, as this is.
Another set of knocks emanate from the door.
“I’m coming! I’m coming!” you proclaim, frustrated. “It’s almost 11 o’clock, what the fuck do you want?” you mumble to yourself quickly before fully opening the door.
On the opposite side, you find two well dressed... individuals. One is a unicorn, and the other is one of those flying tiger things. What are they called, anyway? You know you know this.
Both of them are wearing large silver aviators and impeccable black suits and black ties. They kind of look like hitmen.
“Terribly sorry to disturb you at this late hour, sir,” the tiger-bird hybrid begins. Considering how courteous he seems, you doubt he’s a hitman, but who knows?
“We received a noise complaint a little while ago,” the bird continues. “The complaint was from the rooms in this area.”
Noise complaint? What noise were you making? Noise... Noise...
Oh! That’s right! Daring flipped a shit, threw a lamp against the wall, and started screaming.
You open your mouth to tell them as much, but quickly stop yourself.
That was a nice lamp you broke. Probably expensive. And there is a small hole in the wall. You have enough money to pay for it, but that’s just a waste.
And Daring may get arrested for vandalism... and using the hotel’s- No, the CITY’S supply of hot water because of her endless shower!
The unicorn is the next to speak. “We were wondering if you, or any other guests staying with you, have been raising your voice levels or throwing things?”
Yep.
“No, sir,” you say, “nothing of the sort is happening here. But I heard some noises, though.” You lean out into the hallway in order to point to your right. “I heard some screaming coming from that way. Whoever it was sounded very upset.”
The unicorn and tiger-bird nod. “Thank you for the information, sir,” he says.
“We are very sorry to disturb you,” the unicorn continues. “Have a nice rest of your evening.”
“You too,” you say, closing the door, thankful your lie worked. “Oh wait!” you call out to the security guards before they can investigate the noise further. “We were offered complimentary laundry services when we checked in, and we would love to take advantage of that.”
The unicorn smiles. “Of course, sir. We will send the maid right up for you and your guest.”
You thank him and close the door, wondering how he knew you had a guest.
You suppose it would be obvious. A lot of people in hotels have someone staying with them. Or maybe he saw your less-than-elegant arrival into the hotel earlier today. Your clothes are still nasty.
Oh well. No need to think of that now.
You knock on the bathroom door. “Daring?” you call.
No response.
“Daring? You need to come out. It’s been... an hour? I don’t even know, but you need to finish up.”
No response.
“Daring, you’re going to turn into a furry prune.”
No response. Not even a chuckle or a sigh.
You release a breath. “Fine. Whatever. Can you at least pass me your clothes and a towel? The maid should be here soon.”
The water in the shower stops.
You hear hooves clopping around.
The door opens slightly, and out comes a yellow-ish hoof, holding Daring’s dirty clothes and a clean, white towel.
She then proceeds to drop it all on the floor, close the door again, and turn back on the shower.
“Thanks,” you say, picking up the towel and kicking her dirty, bloody clothing by the door.
After stripping yourself down to nothing, you wrap the towel around your midsection.
Finally being able to return to your magazine, you walk over to the table pick it up, sit on the very large bed the room offers, and continue reading where you left off.
==========
You hear the door to the bathroom open as you are just about to finish the gossip column.
"Are you reading my copy of "Comsmoponytan"?" Daring asks.
“Yep,” you respond, not looking up.
Daring says something sarcastic, but you weren’t listening. Apparently, this pony named Fleur de Lis, a famous fashion model who went into retirement a couple years ago, is now pregnant.
So she is getting wider.
Fatter.
You don’t know why you should care, and you don’t, but the writer of this column sure does. Whoever wrote this is practically making fun of how fat she has gotten.
She can’t even go out to eat in public without people taking her picture and judging her.
Poor girl...
Oh well.
You toss the magazine towards the table, but miss, and it lands on the floor next to Daring.
You would make a joke about how long she has been in the bathroom, but you don’t. She got depressed, and now that she’s finally out, you don’t want to say something that’ll send her back in.
Daring, who has a towel wrapped around her mane, mumbles something before picking up the magazine in her teeth and placing it back on the table.
“Why did you buy that?” you ask. “It was dumb.”
She rolls her eyes and takes the towel off her head with her forehooves. “How else am I supposed to keep up on the latest gossip of Equestria if I’m never there?... I live in Canterlot: the gossip capital of the world. I need to keep up.” She glances around the room. “Where are my clothes?”
“The maid took ‘em a few minutes ago.” Again you have to bite your tongue to keep yourself from making a joke about Daring locking herself in the shower. “She said she’ll have them back in the morning, sometime.”
“Oh. Sweet. Free laundry service.”
She shakes her head and body, further drying herself off. Her mane whips back and forth along with her tail. She stops and shakes her head one final time, getting her mane out of her face.
She smiles at you for a moment.
Then the smile falls.
“Something wrong?” she asks.
You now realize you have been staring, and that now would be an opportune time to go to bed.
“Uh, yeah!” you say quickly, pulling down the covers and sliding underneath them as fast as you can manage. “I’m real tired. Better get to bed, right? Long day. And we still got one idol left.”
You close your eyes and settle down.
“Uh... yeah,” she practically whispers. “I guess so.”
You breathe a sigh of relief. You don’t think she caught you staring. Not that you meant to.
Why were you staring anyway?
…
You don’t know. There is no answer to that question. You were probably just lost in your thoughts and just so happened to be looking at her. The only reason you were looking was because she happened to be standing in that exact spot. If she wasn’t standing where she was, then you wouldn’t have been looking at her.
Just now noticing the noise coming from the foot of the bed, you open your eyes to see what Daring could possibly be doing.
She has thrown the cushions off the couch and is pulling out the mattress from the sofa.
“What are you doing?” you ask, puzzled.
“Wha doesff i look like?” she asks, her voice partially muffled because of the metal bar in her mouth.
“I mean, why are you doing that?”
She spits out the bar once she has the mattress halfway out of the sofa. “So I have somewhere to sleep, obviously. Damn. It’s as though common sense completely eludes you.”
“Geez. No need to get so pissed about it. Just a question.” You toss the blanket off yourself and begin to stand up. “Get in the bed, Daring, I’ll sleep on the couch.”
“Oh no. No way.” She grips the bar back in her teeth and pulls. “Why the hell did you loseff my whiffp? Ah could’ve been done with this stupid thing by now.”
“It wasn’t a question you stubborn baby. I told you to go to sleep so go to sleep.”
“Ah’m fine.” She pulls with all her might, but the mattress stays partially folded.
“C’mon. Let me get that for you.” You stand up fully and walk over next to her.
She drops the bar and puts her forelegs on your chest so you’re both eye-level with each other, startling you. “No no no, sit back down. The bed is way bigger and comfier than the sofa, and you earned it. You’ve done a lot for me already, so just rest. Not only that, but you’re two feet taller than I am, so you could use the extra space.”
“I can curl up on the sofa-bed.” You begin to move forward but Daring, hooves still on your chest, pushes you back.
“You’re also way more injured than I am. Your back is all cut up-”
“It doesn’t hurt that much-”
“But it will once the medicine wears off.” She sighs heavily and drops herself back on all fours. “Why are you always so damn difficult? Just lie down and go to sleep!” She turns and walks back to the sofa.
“Why don’t we just share the damn thing?” you ask. Your face suddenly gets warmer as dirty thoughts flood through your mind.
Daring turns around and smiles at you. “What are you suggesting?” she purrs.
Now your face is positively on fire. “N-Nothing! Nothing like that. It’s a big bed so there’s enough room for the both of us. More than enough, actually.”
She snickers. “Relax! Just teasing. No need to get all red.”
“...I’m not red,” you mumble.
“Yeah,” she laughs. “Totally.” She pushes the mattress with her hooves, but it does not move.
“Need some help?” you ask, seeing her struggle.
“I don’t always need your help,” she grunts, pushing on the mattress.
“Really? ‘Cause you’re doing a tremendous job at proving yourself wrong.”
You’re sure she would glare at you, but she is too concentrated on completing the simple task of folding a damn bed.
“Why the hell do they make these things so hard to use?!” she yells.
Today has been a long day, and you would love for it to be over. So you walk next to Daring, and before she can protest, lift the bottom end up, and the rest of the mattress slides back into the sofa.
"Simple stuff," you say smugly, sticking your tongue out at the angry pegasus.
“Simple stuff...” she mumbles, imitating you. “Fuck that sofa.”
Daring literally jumps into bed, seeming very eager for some reason, bounces a couple of times before settling, and slips under the covers. You enter on your side, lie down, and pull the covers over you.
You completely forgot you were still wearing the towel, but thank whatever deity that is out there that you still are. No need to give Daring a free show.
“Thanks for this, by the way,” Daring says. You look over to her. “You know. Sharing the bed and all. I can’t even begin to tell you how many times I’ve slept on the floor of some jungle or desert. A bed is a nice change of pace.” She smiles.
You smile in return. “Yeah, I bet.”
The both of you just stay smiling at each other for a while.
You looking into her big red eyes.
She’s looking back into yours.
Smiling...
It’s time for bed.
“Good night, Daring,” you say, turning yourself over, flipping off the bed-side lamp, and settling down.
“‘Night,” she responds. After a few moments you hear her shifting around.
The light is off, the room is dark, the bed is comfortable, and you drift off into a much needed sleep with Daring by your side.
==========
Daring snores louder than a drunk homeless man.
You were having such a lovely time sleeping until you were so rudely awoken by those awful sounds. She wasn’t snoring last night.
Maybe it was the wine?
Who knows.
You’re too tired and frustrated to care.
“Shutuuuuuuup!” you groan, pulling the covers tighter over you and glancing at the digital clock on your nightstand.
It’s 2:30 in the morning.
Despite your feeble attempts to silence her snoring, she continues to make her terrible noises.
It’s only been 15 seconds, but that’s 15 seconds you could’ve spent in blissful sleep.
You sit up, grab your pillow, and whack her just hard enough on the chest to wake her up.
“Wazzat?” Daring asks sitting up and looking around.
You pretend to be asleep as to not draw attention to you.
Daring falls backwards, lands heavily back on her pillows, and resumes her snoring.
==========
You don’t know what Daring was dreaming about last night, but it must have been pretty intense considering the way she is currently lying.
Both of your bodies are forming a lowercase “t” position, with you lying in almost exactly the same spot you fell asleep in, except now you’re on your back and facing the ceiling, and Daring is turned sideways. Her right wing is lying on your stomach, so her whole body is facing towards you.
The room is dark, but it’s light enough for you to see everything around you with relative ease.
“Daring?” you whisper, trying to wake her up. “Daring?” you say a little louder.
Her eyes begin to flutter, showing that she is awake, but she has not fully opened her eyes yet.
Panicking and wanting to avoid an inevitable awkward conversation that is sure to follow, you lie your head back down on your pillow and close your eyes, pretending to be asleep. You just have to wait for her to get up, realize the awkwardness she can avoid, and get off of you.
It’s the perfect plan.
You feel Daring stretch. Her back straightens, along with all four of her legs, as she lets out a satisfied sigh. A hoof twitches, she smacks her lips a couple times, and you feel her sitting up slightly.
There are a few moments of silence.
You would think Daring would be surprised. You would think that Daring would move off of you after realizing where she was sleeping.
You would think...
But you’d be wrong.
Instead, you feel Daring flop herself back down to where she was just lying and take a deep breath.
==========
After a good 10 or 15 minutes of you being unsure of what to do, Daring finally gets up. You know for a fact that she has been awake, so why she would voluntarily lie on top of you is something that you cannot comprehend.
You’re probably not the most comfortable of surfaces.
You wait a few seconds after she has gotten up to finally open your eyes, stretch, and pretend to wake up, still wondering why that filly would want to lie on you.
You look to your left where you hear movement.
“What are you doing?” you ask, seeing Daring rummage through the kitchen.
“Finding breakfast,” she responds, looking through the refrigerator.
“Like what? We don’t have anything here.”
“Ha!” she laughs, supposedly finding something. “Bullshit! Look at this!” She stands up and shows you what she has. In one hoof is a bottle of ‘Mountain Do,’ which is some kind of soda. In the other is a small styrofoam container, which holds Daring’s dessert from last night that she did not eat. “Lookit! Breakfast!”
“That’s not breakfast, moron. That’s just shit you happened to find in the fridge.” You roll your eyes. “We’ve got plenty of money, dude. Let’s just get something from room service.”
“Pfft!” She waves a hoof at you, popping open the container of chocolate cake. “That’s dumb. We got food right here! C’mere, I’ll split it with ya.”
She takes a swig from the soda bottle before placing it back down on the counter and gesturing to it with her eyes.
“Have some. It’s good.”
You shake your head. “Fuck that. I’m getting real food, and I’m getting you something too.”
She waves her hooves at you. “I don’t need anything, bro. I-”
“You want pancakes or what?”
“Yes please.”
Her quick response surprised you, but you’re not gonna question it.
“I’ll order it,” Daring says. “You go shower. You look like hell.”
“Aww,” you say sarcastically. “Thanks, buddy.”
You walk into the bathroom and begin your morning rituals.
==========
“You order everything?” you ask, coming out of the bathroom.
Daring looks up from the newspaper she is reading, a look of shock on her face. “Oh my gosh! That’s what I forgot!” She turns the page loudly and dramatically rolls her eyes. “Of course I ordered it. I’m not as forgetful as you.”
Ouch.
“Just a question. What are you reading?”
“The newspaper.”
You rub your face with your hands. “Sweet gentle Jesus forgive me my sins for I am about to murder-”
“It’s a sports article. They’re reporting about soccer ‘cause the World Cup is coming up. Want to hear more about it?”
“No.”
“Then stop asking me questions.”
A few moments of silence pass.
“When is the food gonna get here?” you ask.
“How would I know? Does it look like I work here?”
“Can you answer at least one of my goddamn questions?”
“They said 30 minutes or less. Relax, will ya?”
You go to sit on your unmade queen sized bed. You may as well relax for a while and wait if Daring isn’t gonna talk to you.
You sigh as you lie on the soft mattress.
...
“Gryphon!” you exclaim, sitting up suddenly. “Gryphon! That’s it. Gryphon. I knew it. Gryphon. I knew I knew it. Hot damn!”
“What are you yelling about?” asks a very confused and upset Daring. Oh well. It’s not like you meant to interrupt her.
“The guys at the door earlier... one was a gryphon. I remember Valheita told me about a gryphon and-”
You stop yourself. Valheita told you about Daring using a gryphon to get some treasure, a subject you have been meaning to bring up.
“And?...” Daring asks, rolling her hoof from behind the paper, impatiently waiting for you to continue.
“N-Nothing,” you breathe. “It’s nothing.”
“If you’re sure.” She rolls her eyes and goes back to ignoring you. “Oh!” She looks back to you. “The maid dropped off our clothes. I put yours on the chair right there.” She points to a chair across the room.
You look up and, sure enough, your clothes are all neatly laid out on the chair.
“Thanks, Daring.”
“I didn’t wash ‘em.”
Ignoring her statement, you observe the clothes, checking to see how little they actually managed to get out.
Surprisingly, they are completely clean. Cleaner than you can remember. There is no dirt. There is no blood.
They must have some seriously strong laundry detergent to clean this shit. It must have been industrial strength Tide or some shit.
Damn.
==========
Besides changing into your clean clothes, nothing has happened. Except for silence.
Daring puts down the paper and glances at the clock.
“I’mma shower before the food gets here,” she says, standing up, strolling out in the open and stretching.
Naturally, you look over just in time to see her stretching.
Her wings spread out and flap once. She keeps her rump high in the air as she dips her head and upper body down to the floor.
She glances over at you, and your eyes connect. You glance away, but immediately look back again.
She smiles before standing up straight, her gaze never leaving yours.
“Looking is free,” she coos seductively, “but touching will cost you.” She closes her eyes and slowly walks away, swaying her hips and swishing her tail once.
You look away in embarrassment, but find yourself wanting to look back.
Before you can, the bathroom door has shut and Daring is out of sight.
You grumble angrily to yourself, wondering what could have possibly been going through your head.
You stroll over to the kitchen sink in order to splash some cold water on your face. You’re just not thinking clearly. These past few days have been very strange, you think, which must be why you’re feeling like this.
It’ll pass.
You know it will.
Just then, you hear three knocks on the door. Without giving any conscious thought, you move to answer it.
Opening the door, you are greeted with the pleasant sight of room service. Suddenly feeling famished and overjoyed at the thought of being able to eat, you open the door all the way to allow your waiter to come inside.
The brown pony waiter, who has no horn or wings accompanying him, pushes his cart into your room without saying a word.
Only one tray sits on top of the rolling cart, which is covered by a silver-domed lid.
This confuses you. Didn’t Daring order for the both of you.
Son of a bitch! She probably just ordered for herself... Well screw you too, Daring, I’mma eat your food.
You move towards the kitchen counter where the bag of gold coins sits.
“So how much do I owe you?” you ask, getting a couple bits out of the bag to pay the guy and for a more-than-decent tip.
After a few seconds of silence, you turn around.
The brown pony removes the silver lid off the tray, and underneath lies - not your pancakes - but a very large bowie knife.
Where are my pancakes?
Before you have an attempt to express your confusion to the waiter, he picks up the knife in his mouth and runs at you.
You react, but much too slowly.
The tip of the knife grazes your thigh as you jump to the side, giving you a small tear in your clean pants and a stinging cut.
Reacting naturally, you swing your fist, which connects with the side of your attackers face. The knife falls from his mouth as he grunts in pain.
Before you can move to pick up the weapon, your attacker reels around and bucks you right in the stomach, knocking you backwards.
You groan from your vulnerable position on the ground. “Ooh... Daring!” you call. “Daring!”
“Give me a minute, will ya!” you hear her shout back.
“Daring! It’s a-”
You are interrupted by a swift kick to the side of the head, silencing and disorienting you. You grip the side of your head, rising shakily to your feet.
The brown pony move towards you with a purpose. Still feeling dizzy from that kick in the head, you swing your leg out and pray that it hits some part of the assailant.
Luckily, your foot hits his neck just hard enough to knock him over.
“Thank Jesus,” you whisper, turning towards the bathroom door. “Daring!”
“I’m in the damn bathroom!” she yells. “Can’t a filly get some privacy?!”
“Daring! Get out- ach!” you yell before feeling a tremendous pressure on your back and around your neck. Your attacker has managed to jump on you and get a leg around your throat.
You’re quickly losing air. You stumble around the room, trying to balance yourself, but just end up knocking the breakfast cart over.
You fall to your knees.
“Daring!” you choke out, the offending pony’s foreleg still holding tightly around your neck. You choke and sputter a couple more times, your vision becoming hazy. “D-Dar...ing...”
You desperately swing an elbow behind you, but hit nothing. You swing again, and hit nothing. You swing again, and finally hit your attacker in the stomach, causing his grip to slip for a brief moment, which is all you need.
The blood rushes back into your head and your vision adjusts as you swing behind you again, knocking the brown pony onto his back.
You frantically search the ground for the fallen knife. That knife will decide who wins this battle. Who lives and who dies. Who - THERE IT IS!
The knife is lying only a few feet from your stunned attacker, who is beginning to get back onto his feet.
As you dive and stretch towards the knife, your assaulter notices where the weapon is lying too, and begins to go for it, himself.
You land heavily on your chest, your outstretched hand landing on top of the knife, cutting you a little bit, but the important thing right now is that you have a grip on it. Unfortunately, your attacker attempts to grip the handle of the knife with his hoof.
Luckily, you are the only being in the room with hands, so your grip is much stronger than this horse.
You pull the knife towards you and turn it in your hand so the handle, and not the blade, is now in the grasp of your hand. You quickly sit up on your knees to prepare to fend off this horse.
“Daring!” you shout, as the brown pony dives at you, knocking you onto the floor once more. The stallion is on top of you, looking down with a murderous expression.
“Geez! Just give me a minute!” Daring shouts back. “Do you really have to pee that bad?!”
You move the knife in front of the stallion’s face and are just about to plunge the knife into his throat.
Before you can, however, his face comes towards you and he chomps down on your hand, hard.
You let out a yelp in pain and reflexively relax the muscles in your hand, causing you to drop the knife onto the floor next to you.
Before you can move to pick it back up again, one of the stallion’s forehooves collide with your nose, causing your hand to whip back and bounce off the ground. You grunt in pain and reflexively put your hands over your nose.
Wanting to go back on the offensive, you look back up at your attacker and discover that he has the knife gripped in his mouth.
Before you can curse your misfortune, his head moves quickly towards your, along with the knife. You reflexively move to block him, and end up wrapping your hands around his throat and attempting to push him off you.
“Daring!” you yell, your throat feeling sore from when you were getting choked earlier. Your attacker appears to be stronger than you as his head slowly but steadily moves towards you. No matter how hard you push, he still continues to advance.
“Argh! Daring!” you call, probably for the last time. The knife is just an inch or two away from ending your existence.
The bathroom door opens.
“Alright!” you hear her yell. “I’m out! Now go piss, you-...”
She stops talking, taking in the scene before her. You glance up, along with the pony on top of you, to see Daring staring at the both of you, a towel wrapped around her mane.
In a flash, Daring’s wings flare out and she darts forwards. Before you even register what is happening now, your attacker is no longer on top of you.
Daring literally flies across the room, grabs the knife wielding pony off the ground, flies through the glass balcony doors, shattering them to pieces and making a tremendously loud noise, and drops him from where she is floating.
The attacker falls 15 stories.
Daring flies back in the room just as quick as she left, immediately going to you as you are still lying on the ground.
“Are you alright?” she asks, wrapping a foreleg around the back of your head and lifting it up slightly. She looks your face over. “Your nose is bleeding, but I don’t think it’s broken.”
“Well it hurts like a bitch.”
“Don’t be such a baby. Who was that guy?”
You move a hand to your nose.
“Wait!” Daring says, pushing your hand away with a forehoof. “Don’t touch it! I got it.”
Daring gets up, rushes into the bathroom to grab a towel, and rushes back to wipe your face. The towel is soft, and so is her touch. She doesn’t put a lot of pressure on you but she still manages to stop the bleeding.
As she is doing this, you just look at her... wondering.
Is this Daring? This is Daring, right? Why is she doing this? She would never do this. Why is she so concerned all of a sudden? Worse things have happened to you.
Your face feels all warm for some reason.
Daring glances at you, realizes you’re already looking at her, and quickly looks away. Just a moment later, her gaze returns back to you.
Her cheeks turn red.
“W-What?” she stammers.
“Are you alright, Daring?” you ask, concerned.
She pulls the dirty towel away from your face. “Yeah. Why?”
“‘Cause you just flew through a door made of thick glass.”
She smirks. “Yeah I did! But I used that brown pony as a shield, so he took the whole impact. I don’t even have a scratch on me!”
You roll your eyes. She’s always so proud of herself for things that aren’t all that great. “Yeah, about that, we should probably get the hell out of here.” You gesture around the room with your hands. “The room is a mess, and I don’t want to pay for it. Plus, you’re now probably wanted for murder.”
“It was self defense. I’m not guilty of shit.”
“I know. But instead of us going through a court system and getting the idol in a few months, or years, let’s just leave and get it now.”
Daring is quick to agree with you. “Sounds like a plan to me. Get your stuff and let’s go.”
All the stuff you have is already on your body, so you’re ready.
“Hey! Carry this!” Daring says, tossing you a satchel. You catch it, peek inside, and see the two idols you have already obtained. You grab some extra towels from the bathroom and stuff them into the satchel as well. Never know when some extra towels may come in handy.
Daring gets her saddlebags together, puts them on, and the both of you rush out of the hotel faster than you originally thought possible.
Without stopping to talk to anyone, the both of you head towards the train station.
==========
Written by - ScatMan2001
Edited by - A Renegade Time Lord
Special thanks to my editor for not abandoning me after all this time and for keeping me from looking like an idiot.
The two of you were able to get away from the hotel only moments before the police showed up. There was a large crowd gathered around something on the ground almost directly below your previous room.
You can only assume what it is.
Or who it is.
Just as you were exiting the vicinity of the hotel, dozens of police officers ran into the hotel or flew up to your room.
At this particular moment, it would appear you and Daring are alright.
You would think that now that you’re away from the hotel, you’d be free. But that’s not the case.
The ponies running the place should not have a hard time remembering that two dirty, bloody, sweaty individuals checked-in the previous day and have now disappeared.
You’re definitely wanted.
Daring and you are currently walking to the nearest train station, doing your best not to draw any unwanted attention
Unfortunately, at this time of the day, the streets are packed, so not drawing attention is difficult. But because it is so crowded, at least it will take a while for the police to find you.
Seeing that you have a few moments of silence you decide to try thinking again. It didn’t work the last time, but it never hurts to try.
Name... Name... Name...
You’re not getting anything. Nothing sounds familiar to you.
Fuck. Whatever. I don’t need a name anyway.
You decide to stop thinking. All it did was make you upset, and this day has been bad enough already.
And it’s not even noon!
You look around as the both of you continue venturing through the unnamed city.
It would appear that the area you were just in was the upscale part of the city. There was a luxurious hotel, tall buildings, and a great view of the surrounding area.
However, after walking for a few minutes, you quickly notice not all of the city is like that.
The buildings currently around you are rundown pieces of crap. Everything around you looks like it’s made out of sand. And feces.
You really want to go back to the nicer part of the city, but you can’t because of Daring.
Sure, she saved your life, but she was the one who endangered it in the first place! Why the hell does everyone and their mother want to kill her?
Not to mention that she could have gotten rid of your attacker in a less flamboyant way. She didn’t need to chuck him off a building.
But you’re grateful.
You really are. You should stop giving her such a hard time. She really seems to be wanting to help you, even though you're not a single step closer to actually getting back home.
“This way,” Daring says, getting your attention.
You look down and notice she has already started walking down a separate street to your left, and you follow her without question.
You continue to observe your surroundings, as bland as they may be.
“You alright?” Daring asks from next to you.
You nod without looking at her. “This place looks like Mos Eisley,” you say.
“Like what?”
“Mos Eisley.”
“Yeah, I heard what you said. What is it?”
You roll your eyes. “It’s a city in ‘Star Wars.’ Everyone knows that.”
“What the hell are you talking about?”
“It’s a movie.”
“Hey!” she exclaims excitedly, hitting your thigh with a foreleg. “You’re remembering stuff!”
“Yeah. Movies,” you sigh disappointedly. Why are you remembering this weird things and not actually anything that has any real relevance to you. “Not exactly useful information.”
“At least it’s something.”
“Yeah. I guess.”
The both of you continue to wade through the massive crowds of ponies and zebras and camels.
==========
You have been walking for hours!
Naturally, cities are meant to hold thousands upon thousands of individuals, so they are very large. And because they are so large and everypony has somewhere they need to be, there are trains.
But you haven’t seen any!
The both of you need to be getting the hell out of the city as soon as possible. Clearly, one of Daring’s enemies knows that she’s here. And on top of that, the police are out to get you.
How many enemies could Daring possibly have?
This is getting ridiculous. You were captured by zebras and almost murdered by some pony. What’s going to attack you next? A donkey?
You look around, suddenly feeling paranoid.
It is actually entirely plausible for you to be attacked by said animal. Any of these animals milling about around you could attack you.
If what Daring said is true, about how valuable those artifacts of hers are, anyone could be after them. Anyone!
You’re not safe anywhere! The only being that you can kind of rely on is Daring, but it’s better than nothing.
You come to an intersection, and look to your right.
“Yes!” you shout, causing a few ponies around to look at you, but you ignore them. “Daring! There it is!”
“What?” she asks.
“The train station, derp.”
“Okay?” She raises an eyebrow at you. “So?”
“So?!” you shout back, not believing her ignorance. “Let’s get the hell out of here! This city isn’t the best place for us right now.”
She rolls her eyes and continues walking straight. “Yeah, tell me about it.”
“Daring! You’re going the wrong way. The train station is right over there.” You point a finger to your right.
She looks over to where you’re pointing. “Yeah. I see it.”
“Then let’s go!”
“Yeah, right. Come on, dude. That’s exactly what they’d expect. Isn’t it?”
“What are you talking about.”
She turns around and walks back over to you.
“Don’t you think they’d assume we’d try to get out of town?” she asks. She doesn’t wait for you to respond. “Yes. Yes they would. Every train station and airport security guard is probably on the lookout for a sexy yellow mare with beautiful red eyes and her bumbling monkey of a sidekick.”
“...I’m not a sidekick.”
“Point is, we have to avoid those areas especially. We will probably be pretty easy to spot. Primarily, you. So we need to lay low until I can think of something.”
Fuck.
You take a deep breath, knowing that she is right, and decide to stop arguing. “Fine, fine. In that case, where are we going? We’ve been walking for hours.”
“I’ve got an old friend of mine who own a cheap motel on the other side of the city. It’s a little rundown, and a lot of sketchy characters hang around there, but it’s our only option.”
“So we’re going to the slums?”
She laughs. “Yeah. Basically.”
You gesture down the road. “Lead the way! After all, I’m only your sidekick.”
She giggles and begins to walk away.
==========
You’re hungry. Again.
Very hungry.
Breakfast was not had, and lunch had to be skipped because Daring wanted to get to the motel as soon as possible.
And it would seem that after hours of wading through incredible crowds of creatures, you have finally reached the poorest, most rundown part of the city you have seen thus far.
You thought the small houses and buildings around the hotel were bad, but these are terrible!
Abandoned houses and buildings with broken windows are boarded up and left to rot for all eternity.
However, even though some of the houses look empty, occasionally you see a pony inside, doing whatever it is they do.
Probably drugs.
“Here it is!” Daring exclaims, smiling and gesturing with her hooves to an old, dirty, one-story building.
Most of the buildings you have seen are empty or falling apart, but not this one. It looks like this one is just incredibly dirty. Maybe if they cleaned it, it would look presentable.
But you doubt whoever Daring’s friend is that owns the place has the budget for such a simple thing as cleaning. You don’t know why anyone would want to spend a night in this part of the city.
God knows you don’t. But you’re being forced to.
A sign above the motel that reads “Shangri-La” in bright neon lights is hanging off center. And some of the letters have burnt out, or are flickering.
“Definitely lives up to its’ name, doesn’t it?” Daring asks, chuckling and elbowing you in the thigh. “Let’s get a room then get something to eat. I know you’re hungry.”
“Starving, actually.”
“Never would have guessed.”
==========
The inside of the motel is just as dirty and disgusting as you thought it would be. The lobby consists of a small open space with a desk. Behind the desk is a door that leads... somewhere.
To the left of the desk begins a hallways. To the right of the desk begins another hallway, where all the rooms are.
It’s really quiet. It doesn’t look like anyone is here.
“Hey, Marley!” Daring shouts, breaking the silence and startling you. “Get out here, ya old geezer!”
“Who dat?!” a very rough voice shouts back from behind the door behind the counter.
“Who do you think it is, old man?! It’s your girlfriend!”
Slowly, the door behind the desk opens, and out walks a very old, very tired, very wrinkled camel. He has a cane attached to his foreleg which helps him slowly move along towards the counter.
“Where my girlfriend at?!” he shouts, smiling.
“She’s right here,” Daring smiles.
The camel finally reaches the desk and leans against it. He gives Daring a big toothy smile... or he would, if he had any teeth. From what you count, he has three.
He smells old. The camel smells exactly like what you’d expect an old person to smell like. From his breath to his natural odor to the way he looks, all of your senses are telling you that he is old.
“Why, Ms. Do!” he shouts. “I hasn’t seen ya none in years! Where you been? Bring me somethin?”
Daring shakes her head. “No, no, not this time. I actually need a room.” She glances at you quickly before leaning in to whisper something to ‘Marley’ the camel. You can’t hear what it is, though.
Marley’s eyes go wide and his jaw drops a little. “Ooh... Ooh... I see, I see, youngin’. Don’t you worry ‘bout it. I gots a room for yas.”
He reaches under the desk and pulls out a key.
“Who your friend, Ms.Do?” he asks, looking up at you. “He really tall!” He laughs a crazy laugh. “Ho boy! He so tall... He so tall he can’t barely fit in this room! He he!”
This guy is crazy, but he’s funny, and you can’t help but laugh.
“Marley,” Daring says, gaining the attention of both of you. “This is my good friend, ‘Jay.’”
Wait. What did she just say?
You gaze down at Daring, probably looking confused as ever. You mouth “Jay?” and tilt your head to the side.
She nods. “Go with it,” she whispers to you, before looking back at Marley. “He’s a human.”
“Well, Jay!” Marley shouts, extending a hoof towards you. “It’s ma pleasure! Ma pleasure indeed! Any friend of Ms. Do here is a friend of mine!”
“So how much is it?” Daring asks, producing the bag of golden coins. “It’s just for the one night, for now. If we’re going to stay longer I’ll let you know tomorrow.”
The camel shakes his hoof at Daring. “Now, now, Ms. Do. Don’t be troubling yourself. I knows you ain’t carryin’ many bits with ya, so this ‘un is on the house.”
“Don’t be ridiculous, Marley,” Daring ignores him and puts five golden coins on the table. “You take that, you hear me? And fix this place up.”
Marley’s eyes go wide. “Oh ho! You bet Ms. Do. You bet! I hasn’t seen this much money since I was your age.”
“You’re still my age, Marley,” Daring says, putting the bag of bits away. “You’re only as old as you feel.”
“Then I’m 125!”
You all laugh at the joke. Especially Marley, who bangs on the desk.
“Now that’s enough out of me,” he says, beginning to turn around. “Y’all take that key there and go on off to your room. I’ll be seein’ ya fer breakfast!”
“We’re eating breakfast here?” you ask Daring as quietly as possible.
“Not a chance,” she whispers. “‘Night Marley!”
Marley finally reaches his door again. “G’night! You two lovebirds enjoy yourselves now, y’hear?!” he laughs and you can feel your cheeks burning. “But not too much!”
Your face is positively on fire.
Marley closes the door, laughing and mumbling to himself.
You look down at Daring, and see her face is red too.
She clears her throat and kicks at the floor. “Uhm... so yeah... that’s Marley. He’s a crazy one, but he’s cool.” The she whispers, “He just doesn’t know when to stop talking.”
Another few moments pass in an awkward silence.
“Should we drop our bags off?” you ask.
“Yeah. Yeah, definitely.”
You grab the key off the desk and head towards your room.
The room is a very short walk away, as it is the first door on the left. Opening the door, you see a dimly lit, dirty bedroom with one bed.
One. Again.
There is a bathroom to your right, which is incredibly dirty and looks like someone was murdered in it in the past few days.
And they probably were.
“Why did you tell him my name was ‘Jay?’” you ask, curious. Not that you particularly mind it. It’s a good name, and it’ll do until you can remember your real one.
She shrugs. “I don’t know. It’s a nice name. And it’s a letter.” She looks around the room. “Besides, I needed to call you something other than ‘monkey’ and ‘idiot.’ Why? Do you not like it?”
“No, no, it’s fine. You could’ve asked for my opinion about it, but that’s okay, I guess.”
“Alright then! Let’s eat!” Daring says, dropping her a couple bags but keeping one on.
“Where are we going?” you ask.
“Uhm... I think there is a bar around here. How ‘bout that?”
You don’t even think about it. “Sure. Sounds good to me. I could use a drink, anyway.
You head back out into the late evening light of the city.
==========
“Yes it is!” Daring shouts, growing very impatient with your doubtfulness.
“No!” you counter simply. “It’s not!”
“How would you know? You can’t remember anything!”
“Yeah! I can’t remember shit like my name or where I’m from, but I definitely remember that a magical horse does not raise the sun!”
“You’re full of it, you know that?”
“The sun doesn’t move, dipstick. It stays in the same damn place forever and ever.”
“Wow, you’re dumb. The Earth doesn’t move! The sun goes around the Earth.”
You’re not going to argue anymore. It is always important to never argue with an idiot, lest they drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.
“Alright, sweet,” Daring says, looking at a small building. “We’re here. I’m so thirsty.”
The building has a very short line outside of it, with a very large gryphon wearing sunglasses standing at the front.
“What is this?” you ask.
“It’s a bar.”
You hear music playing. It’s distant, but you definitely hear it. “This isn’t a bar. It’s a nightclub.”
She shrugs. “Do they got booze?”
“I guess, but-”
“Then who cares?”
Whatever.
You go to the back of the short line out of the nightclub. The name of the club is written above the entrance, but it’s in some language that you do not know, so you can’t read it.
The music from inside the club is incredibly loud, and you can easily hear it as you wait in line right outside.
Before you have an opportunity to say something that’ll piss Daring off, the door to the club flies open, and one by one, five stallions are literally thrown out, each one landing on top of the other.
The ponies that through them out yell something, but you can’t understand what it was.
The bouncer gryphon at the front begins letting everypony in. You nod at him as you walk by and enter the nightclub.
You can’t believe Daring would know about a place like this.
To your right are a bunch of stallions and mares dancing to the music. Although, ‘dancing’ is used very loosely. They’re practically having sex as all the stallions and mares are rubbing against each other.
Farther to your right is a stage, and upon that stage are two mares, dressed in incredibly provocative and lacy clothing, slowly dancing and spinning to the cheers of many drunk stallions.
You don’t look for long, though, as Daring pulls you towards the bar on your left. You both quickly take two open seats.
“Why are we here?” you ask, looking around. This isn’t your kind of place.
She shrugs. “You said you were hungry. So eat something.”
“Here?”
“Where else?”
“A restaurant?”
She waves a forehoof at you. “This place is cheaper, and we’re trying to lay low, remember? And it’s got plenty of alcohol.”
“You drink a lot?”
She shakes her head, looking around for someone. “Not at all! In my business, it’s best to remain sober 24/7. But after recent events, I think I can allow myself a couple drinks.”
A zebra, who is the bartender, immediately comes up to the both of you, and asks you something you cannot understand.
“What?” you ask.
“Oh,” he realizes. “Equestrian? You speak Equestrian?”
This is clearly not his first language, but he’s doing alright.
“Yep!” Daring says, getting his attention. “I’ll take a ‘Bitter Bite.’”
“And for you?” he asks, turning to you.
You don’t know. There has to be something here that you like, but you don’t know what you like. Do they have a menu you can look at?
“He’ll get what I’m getting,” Daring interjects impatiently. “And get us some peanuts or something.”
The bartender turns away to make your drinks.
You look at Daring.
“Daring,” you begin, getting her attention.
“What?”
“I need you to tell me everything.”
She just looks back at you. “Everything? What do you mean?”
“Your enemies, Daring. You clearly have a few, and I want to know anything and everything about them. I’ve been beaten and cut and attacked at random and I want to know why.”
“Alright, dude, calm down.”
The bartender places your drinks in front of the both of you and leaves to attend to other customers.
Daring takes a small sip of her drink before putting it back down.
“I’ll tell ya,” she says. “You only had to ask. Alright, so I’ll start with who I see the most. His name is ‘Ahuizotl.’ I don’t know what he is exactly, but he’s some giant blue monster that conveniently pops up whenever I finally get my hooves on an artifact.
“He’s my biggest competitor, as I see him more than any other competitor of mine. And every time I see him, he tries to kill me.”
“Kill you?”
“Mm-hmm.” She takes another small sip from her glass. “He captures me, and tries to execute me in some ridiculously elaborate way, but I always manage to escape, obviously enough.”
“What’s his motivation?”
“What do you mean?”
You hear whistling and cheering to your right, and can only assume what is happening.
“Why does he treasure hunt? Why does he try to kill you?”
She shrugs. “I don’t know. Many reasons, I guess. Could be money, glory, power...” She chuckles. “Or maybe he just really hates my books!”
She laughs and takes a sip of her drink.
“His motivation is whatever happens to benefit him,” she says. “Most of these guys are just in it for themselves. Oh! And he’s always travelling around with animals for some reason.”
Wait... but everyone is an animal...
“I don’t know why. Next on my list would be ‘Valheita.’ But you killed him, so he’s off my list now. I guess Kiduttaa would replace him, considering he is still alive.” Then she mumbles “But hopefully not for long.”
A bowl of peanuts is placed in front of the both of you, and Daring grabs one.
“I doubt we’ll be seeing much of him anymore, anyway.”
You raise an eyebrow. “And why is that?”
“‘Cause tomorrow, we are hopefully gonna be getting out of this country. Our next artifact is hundreds of miles east of here.”
“Well shit.”
“I know.”
“Who else is there?”
“Umm...” Daring thinks as she cracks open a peanut. “Oh! There is this massive group of ponies, mainly unicorns, called the ‘Kansallissosialistinen.’”
Holy shit. What was that?
“Can you repeat that?” you ask.
“The ‘Kansallissosialistinen.”
“Why is their name so complicated?”
She shrugs. “I don’t know. They usually go by a much shorter name, though... uh... it starts with an ‘N’. Shit! I can’t remember.”
“What do they do?”
“I don’t see them nearly as often as I used to. They’re at war with some other country right now, so their attention is turned towards that, but I used to run into them all the time. They were always looking for some magical artifact that’d give their unicorns more power and ability to take over the world. In a nutshell.”
This all sounds incredibly familiar.
“The list goes on and on,” she says, rolling her hoof. “I could sit here all night and most of tomorrow listing every single one to you, but I won’t. Those three are the only ones I think we have to worry about.”
“Do you have any allies?”
Daring bites her lip.
“Ba ha ha ha! Oh man! Oh man!”
What did you say?
Daring laughs and puts her head against the bar. She brings a hoof up and hits the bar hard a couple of times before snorting.
She wipes away a tear before looking at you.
“Woah... Ho ho, man, that was funny...” She stops laughing. “Wait, were you being serious?”
You nod.
“Oh. I thought it was obvious. I don’t have any allies, and hardly any friends. There is no room for them in this business.” She almost finishes her drink. “I used to work with a few friends... but those days are long gone.”
You’ll ignore that statement for now, but store it in the back of your mind to bring up later.
Before you can ask your next question, a stallion walks up from behind Daring and says something. Both you and your only friend turn around to see a brown earth pony with greasy black hair smiling at Daring. You can smell the alcohol coming off of him.
He says something else, but it’s not in English.
“What did he say?” you ask Daring.
“I don’t know,” she says, smiling at the earth pony.
He walks to Daring’s side and leans against the bar, his eyes never leaving hers. Whether him leaning against the bar is to look cool or to simply hold him upright, you do not know.
Yours and Daring’s attention is fully on this guy. He says something else to her.
He reaches up a hoof and pushes Daring’s mane out of her eyes.
Why do you feel so angry all of a sudden?
Daring gives the stallion a flirtatious smile and blinks her eyes rapidly at him. “Oh my,” she says softly. “What a big, strong stallion you are.” She reaches over and feels the stallions’ foreleg muscles.
He smiles at her and gestures with a hoof, signalling that he wants her to follow him. He hops off the bar and begins to walk to the back of the bar, expecting Daring to follow.
Once the stallion is fully turned around behind Daring, she quickly extends a hind leg and bucks the stallion hard in his short tail.
For those who are unaware, behind a stallions’ tail are his genitals.
The action makes your nuts hurt, and you reflexively reach a hand down to make sure they are still there.
The stallion yelps loudly and collapses, grabbing his swollen nuts with his forehooves.
Daring gets up, walks next to the injured stallion, and puts her head next to his. “You don’t get to touch me,” she growls. “Now get the hell out of here.”
He begins to slide across the floor like a worm, and Daring retakes her seat.
You don’t know if you should laugh, or cry at how much pain that guy is probably in. So you just sit in stunned silence.
Daring looks over at you before flicking her head to the side to get her mane out of her face.
“So!” she begins. “I forgot about this guy, but numbnuts over there reminded me.”
You clear your throat as the injured pony finally leaves your field of vision. “Alright, who?”
“This French earth pony named ‘Fluage.’ He’s got a white coat, black mane, blue eyes, and always wears a red beret. Always.”
“Alright. Then what motivates him? Should we be worried?”
“Oh yeah. Definitely.”
She takes a big sip from her drink. A really big sip. She actually manages to finish the rest of it.
Her face scrunches up as the burning liquid makes its’ way down her throat.
“Ahh,” she sighs. She clears her throat. “His motivation is me.”
“...”
What?
“You?”
“Me.”
“What do you mean?”
“The only reason this guy does what he does is because he wants me. He doesn’t care about artifacts or money. He just wants me.”
“Can you elaborate?”
She nods. “When I first started writing my books, he loved them. He bought them all, read them over and over and over again, and soon became a big fan of mine... a very big fan... Hey barkeep!” she yells, looking behind the counter. “Another round over here!”
She waits for the bartender to finish making your drinks, and puts one in front of each of you, despite you not having finished your first.
She drinks the entire thing in one hit.
“Agh.” She takes a deep breath. “Despite my books being labeled ‘Adventure’ and everyone assuming it’s fiction, he thought they were real. Everyone thought he was just crazy, which he is, but he was right.”
You push her your drink, and she drinks it all in one hit, again.
Whoever this guy is must be really stressing her out.
“So he starts looking for me, and after a couple years, he actually finds me. See, I was in France looking for some really old sword in the catacombs of their capital, but he saw me on the street... Well, to make a long, disturbing story short, he shot me with a tranquilizer, somehow got me into his house, and tried to have his way with me when I woke up.”
Daring looks at the random stallion sitting next to her, and notices that he’s busy making out with some mare.
Daring grabs his beer, ‘cause he’s not looking, and almost downs it all.
“Well...” you begin, not entirely knowing how to phrase this question.
“Well what?” Daring asks, licking her lips.
“...did he?”
“No! No. He almost did, though. I barely got out.”
She takes a deep breath.
“That wasn’t the last time I saw the guy, either. Every once in a while, he pops up. Even in the most unexpected of places. Like, last year, I was in some desert city, no where near France, but I saw him. He was 100 feet away from me, and was probably looking for me. But I haven’t talked to him since that first time we met.”
“Is he around here?”
She shrugs. “Who knows? Maybe. He’s crazy rich, so he can go almost anywhere in the world with ease. Every time I leave Equestria, I swear I see that creep somewhere.”
You finally finish your first drink.
Daring is quickly looking around behind the bar. “Where is that damn zebra?”
"I think you've had enough, Daring."
“I’m an adult. I’ll drink whatever I want.”
You shake your head. “No. You’re done.” You grab the bit sack out of her saddlebags and pay for your drinks, plus a generous tip.
You turn around and look up.
On the other side of the club stands the stallion that Daring kicked earlier. He’s talking with four or five other ponies and a gryphon. He points towards you and Daring with a hoof.
Oh fuck.
You don’t know who he’s talking to, but they don’t look friendly.
“Let’s go,” you say urgently, grabbing onto Daring’s leg and dragging her behind you as you rush out of the bar.
“Noo!” she groans. “I’m thirsty!”
You ignore her pleas to return to the nightclub and quickly return to the motel.
“Put me down!” the intoxicated pegasus loudly slurs, her voice echoing down the empty street.
You ignore her, of course. The present situation requires the both of you to run away as fast as possible, and considering Daring has elected not to move quickly, you will have to do so for the both of you.
The only noise that can be heard is your feet rapidly colliding against concrete as you make your way back to the only place that can currently provide any form of safety.
For whatever reason, carrying a half-drunk horse feels pretty strange, but you’re getting used to it.
You have a vague idea of where Marley’s motel is, so you try your best to run in that direction.
The streets are dark, except for the few spaces that are barely illuminated by the flickering or dead street lamps, so you can barely see. Luckily, you don’t see anyone immediately in front of you.
“I said put me down!”
“I heard what you said. Shut up.”
You begin panting as you race down the road, carrying your only friend like a baby.
An intoxicated baby.
Beads of sweat begin to form on your forehead and you try to remember when the last time you worked out was.
Probably never.
You have both arms held out in front of you with Daring properly situated so she won’t fall as you run.
“I hate you.”
Those large stallions in the bar could have been anybody, and that is why running away is the best option.
Maybe they were security guards?
Security would have just kicked you out of the bar. But if they were police, or heard that you are wanted for murder, you could be in a cell.
That is one experience that you have already had, and would not mind never having again.
For all you know, though, they may be some of Daring’s enemies, which she appears to have a lot of. If that is the case, then running was clearly the best option, lest you are captured once again.
Daring hiccups.
“Put me down!” she yells, slurring just a bit. “Or you’ll suffer the con… consequences.”
You would roll your eyes, but you don’t want to look away from what is directly in front of you.
Daring does not intimidate you, and a drunk Daring does little more than amuse you.
Despite all her protesting, she has not actually physically tried to free herself from your grasp. She is just yelling at you to put her down, but she hasn’t moved an inch since you picked her up.
All four of her legs are tucked into her body, her wings are furled up against her sides, and she periodically glances at your surroundings. Unmoving.
Not that you mind.
If she was rolling about in your arms, then you would drop her, and who knows what those ponies chasing you will do if they catch up.
Why are ponies always chasing after you anyway? And why the hell would they want you dead?
Seriously, ever since you woke up a few days ago things of all shapes and sizes have been trying to kill you. Whether it be booby traps that were set up centuries ago that still somehow work effectively, or aggressive, miniature, psychopathic equines that are after ancient clay figurines.
They definitely know that you’re after those three idols, so why would they try to kill you? Why wouldn’t they simply find it themselves? It’d save a lot of time and effort for everybody.
Or why not wait until Daring collects all three before attacking the both of you? That way they could get all three artifacts and Daring. From what you’ve gathered, basically everyone wants the artifacts, and at least one of your enemies wants Daring. So why not wait?
There could be hundreds of answers to those questions, so you won’t assume anything.
You quickly glance back and only see a dark street with no sign of life to be found.
Good.
For the moment, it seems like you’re in the clear. You’re not actually sure if anyone ever started chasing you and Daring in the first place, but just to be safe, you ran.
And picked Daring up.
And there was a perfectly acceptable reason to do so at the time! And there still is!
You wouldn’t want her falling or stumbling around this sketchy area of the city.
“I’m sorry. I don’t hate you.”
The entire area around you almost seems deserted. Occasionally you see a few ponies or camels or whatever inside one of the rundown buildings just chilling, minding their own business. But no one seems to be out on the street right now.
Aside from you and your partner.
“There’s the happy couple!” an old, familiar voice booms, shattering the pleasant quietness of this part of the city.
It seems that you have finally reached Marley’s motel, which looks just as shitty at night as it did early in the day.
“Where you two been?” he asks as you approach him, Daring in your arms. “Y’all’ve been gone for some time now.”
“Just went to a bar, Marley,” you say, feeling the effects of running for the past ten or fifteen minutes. You’re very tired.
“Ooh hoo! Ms. Do was always a classy one!” He laughs, and you would too if you had the energy for it. “And I can see she’s had a little too much!”
You look down at her, and she seems to be staring at the motel doors, completely ignoring the fact that you and Marley are talking about her.
“Uh…” you think, trying to remember just how much she had to drink tonight. “I guess? She did drink a lot pretty fast without eating anything, so I guess so.”
You just now notice a bucket of paint with a paintbrush laying on top of the can.
“What are you doing out here, Marley?” you ask. “It’s a little late to be working, isn’t it?”
He shakes his head resolutely. “No suh! Not at all! Why, nighttime is the best time to do anything. See, everypony else is sleeping, so it’s real nice and quiet, and it’s not hot.”
That makes a surprising amount of sense coming from the one of the craziest being you have ever met.
Why can’t you meet anyone normal?
Seriously, you haven’t spoken with a single organism that could possibly qualify as being “sane.”
“Well alright,” you begin, “but what are you doing?”
“Painting!”
“Painting?”
He nods his head. “My pappy taught me that the better the paint job, the less the cracks in the wall are visible, the better the place looks.”
Well okay then.
It still looks like a rundown motel to you, but alright.
“Whatever works.”
“How’re you, Ms. Do?” he asks, looking at the pegasus in your arms.
You wonder why he doesn’t think it’s weird that you are carrying her, but then you remember that he thinks you’re a couple for some reason.
How could anyone possibly come to that conclusion?
“Mmmm…” Daring groans, shifting herself in your arms. Luckily you manage to hold on to her. “Aight.”
“Ms. Do’s seeming a little tipsy!” he shouts unnecessarily, as it is obvious that she is intoxicated. He looks up at you. “Crazy night?”
“I guess you could say that,” you respond, not seeing a point in trying to convince him that you’re not a couple. He wouldn’t believe it anyway.
“I bet ya it’s only gonna get crazier!” he yells, laughing.
You shake your head and release a breath. “Yeah, sure, whatever. Marley, I need a favor.”
He stands up as straight as possible and looks at you with determination. It would be amusing if you didn’t think you could end up being arrested at any moment.
“Yes suh!” he shouts, saluting. “What you need old Marley to do?”
“If anyone comes looking for me or Daring, just tell them we aren’t here… Or tell them we ran somewhere far away from here.”
That might throw them off your trail.
“You betcha!” he says going back over to the wall. “Anthin’ for a frien’ of Ms. Do, there!” He points back to the inebriated horse in your arms, who isn’t moving. “Don’t you worry, child. Ms. Do has come to me for help for many years, now. We’re friends.”
Good.
“Thanks, Marley,” you say, walking by him and into the motel.
“And try to keep it down, youngins!” he shouts, roaring with laughter that bounces off the semi-empty buildings and echoes down the street.
==========
You glance down at the pegasus in your arms, now that you know you’re safe. She still isn’t moving much, but at least she’s alive.
She has her forelegs wrapped around her chest, and you see something underneath them.
“What is that?” you ask. “What are you holding?”
Her forelegs wrap tighter around her. “Mine!” she yells, her voice echoing down the long, empty hallways.
“Daring, what is it?”
“It’s mine!” Her eyes shut tightly and she lowers her head, trying to hold the object even tighter.
“You’re a child,” you say, shaking your head and managing to get your room key out of your pocket while still holding Daring.
You don’t know what the hell she is holding or how you did not realize that until now, but you suppose you just weren’t paying much attention to her until now.
You unlock the door and walk into your room.
It’s dark in here, and the only source of light seems to be a lamp on an old wooden desk at the far end of the room. You don’t plan on sleeping just yet, so you move to turn it on.
But first, you literally toss Daring onto the bed, where she lands with a squeak from the bed and a squeak from her.
“Hey!” she shouts, sounding more alert than she was a few moments ago. “Watch it! You almost spilled my drink.”
You ignore her, of course. There is no need to listen to her while she is like this.
You turn on the lamp and the light bulb flickers for a few seconds before finally shining brightly, and illuminating the room. Looking around, you think it would have just been better to leave the light off. The room is a mess and looks like a crime scene.
You stroll back over and close the door.
That run from the nightclub to this shitty motel room has really tired you out, and you need a bit of a rest.
“Jay!”
Maybe you actually should go to bed? It’s pretty early but it’s not like there is anything to do. You could read one of Daring’s magazines or something, maybe, but that doesn’t seem to interest you right now.
And you didn’t eat. You went out to eat, and no eating occurred.
Just last night you were eating a big, juicy steak in a 5 star hotel, and now you are eating nothing in a negative 18 star piece of shit, rundown, smelly murder scene.
Maybe you should try going out again? You don’t think anyone is following you anymore.
“Jay!”
You look over to Daring who is shouting from the bed.
“Answer me when I talk to you!” she demands.
You shake your head. “Look, ‘Jay’ clearly isn’t my name. If you actually said my real name, I would have looked up.”
At least, you assume you would have.
“I need a new name,” you say.
“Yeah? How ‘bout I call you ‘A humongous pain in the a-”
“Jay’s fine.”
“Good! Then answer me!”
You rub your eyes, feeling more and more tired by the second. “Jesus, Daring, what the hell do you want?”
She gets up and stumbles over to the desk before placing a bottle on it.
Is that whiskey?
She hiccups.
“Is that whiskey?” you ask, still standing by the door.
“Mm-hmm.” She nods her head before pulling the top off with her teeth with an audible “pop.”
“Where did you get that?” you ask as she takes the bottle into her hooves and taking a large swig directly from it.
“Aaagh!” she sighs, scrunching her face a bit at the burning sensation. “Behind the counter at the bar!” she smiles, looking at the alcohol as though it is a priceless artifact. “Before you dragged me… dragged me out of the place, I just reached over the counter and took it!”
She laughs, hugging the bottle close to her chest.
“That’s illegal,” you point out.
“Arrest me!” She starts drinking again.
“I think you’ve had enough,” you say, beginning to walk towards her. You need to get that bottle back.
Why is she drinking so much, anyway?
She literally told you, no less than an hour ago, that in this “business” of hers, it is best to always remain sober.
You reach an arm out to grab the bottle, but before you can, she extends her wings, flaps them once, and propels herself on top of the bed, startling you.
“It’s mine!”
You put up your hands, trying to show her that you’re her friend.
“Daring,” you begin, “I really don’t want you getting hurt, alright? So just give me-”
“Why not?!” she yells back in response, sounding genuinely angry with you.
“Why what?”
“Why don’t you want me getting hurt?” She hiccups. “Why… Why… You only hang out with me so you can get back home!” she shouts as though it is an insult.
Well, you can hardly disagree, but you have to watch what you say around an angry drunk.
“Daring,” you begin quietly, trying to calm her down. “I can’t disagree with you there.”
Her ears perk up, her wings shoot out, and her eyes narrow as she glares menacingly at you, as though she is going to attack you at any moment. “I knew you-!”
“But!” you cut her off, wanting to explain yourself. “But, if we weren’t in this ridiculous situation, I would still definitely hang out with you.”
Her features soften, her wings sag a little bit, and you feel more encouraged to continue.
“You’re really cool, Daring. You’re annoying most of the time, but you’re cool. And we may argue a whole hell of a lot, but I wouldn’t have it any other way.”
You feel your cheeks burn at your phrasing, and you suddenly feel incredibly nervous.
“Besides, hanging out with you is the most fun I think I could ever have.”
Despite how incredibly dangerous it seems to be.
“You… R-Really?” she stutters out.
“Really, Daring. You’re strong, tough, witty, pretty funny, and you’ve always been there for me, which is a lot more than I can say for anybody else.”
Her face turns red.
Probably from all that booze.
She looks down at the mattress and rubs a hoof against her opposite foreleg, not saying anything.
You notice the almost-empty bottle of whiskey is still sitting there, and take your chance to grab it.
Daring doesn’t even seem to notice as she continues to look down at the bed, ears flat, face red, and a small smile on her lips.
You chuck the bottle out of the window and hear it shatter against the ground.
Daring still doesn’t look up.
“You really think so?” she asks quietly.
You smile for some reason, feeling really warm and happy. “Of course, Daring. I’m not gonna lie to ya.”
Damn it’s hot in here. This motel needs a new AC unit.
There is a moment of silence that passes over the room.
It has gotten really hot in here. Sure, the general location of the city is naturally hot, but this is just ridiculous. You feel almost as warm as you did when you were running.
Daring gave Marley a lot of money. That crazy old camel should really invest in keeping this place at a reasonable temperature.
*Thump* *Thump* *Thump*
You hear banging on the wall, and both you and Daring look over to see what it is.
“Oh! Ooh!” some mare moans. “Dusk Shine! Faster!”
Well… this is certainly unexpected.
Unsure of what to say now, you look over at Daring, who is already looking back at you.
The both of you quickly turn your gaze to some other part of the room, feeling too embarrassed to make eye contact.
The thumping continues, and you silently curse this motel and its’ incredibly thin walls.
“Ahem!” you clear your throat, breaking the awkward tension you feel. “Uhm… maybe we should go to bed?”
“Y-Yeah,” the pegasus stutters. “Cool. Sounds good to me.”
You strip off your clothes until you are just wearing your boxers, turn off the lamp, and waddle across the darkened room, trying to find the bed.
As it turns out, the bed finds you, and your two smallest toes bang hard into the foot of the bed.
“Agh! Fuck!” you curse, hopping into the bed and crawling up like a baby that can’t walk yet.
You can’t see, so you just blindly feel around for the end of the bed. But luckily, your vision seems to be slowly coming back to you.
“W-What? What are you doing?” you hear Daring ask.
“Nothing, nothing,” you assure, not wanting to feel anymore awkward than you already are.
“Uhm… Jay?” she asks, and her voice sounds a lot closer than you originally thought it would. Unfortunately, the room is still too dark for you to see.
“Yeah?”
“Uhm…” she clears her throat. “Uhm. Can I… Can I help you?”
Your vision finally acclimates enough to the dark room for you to see where you are.
Your eyes go wide and the room gets just a little warmer.
Right underneath you is Daring Do, lying on her back, forelegs tucked into her chest, and looking up at you with an inquisitive and nervous expression. You have both hands on either side of her head, resting on the bed as to hold you up.
How you did not realize this sooner is beyond you.
Oh shit.
“Sorry!” you apologize, before rolling onto your side and away from Daring, putting plenty of space in between the both of you. “Didn’t mean to crawl on top of you. I, uh… couldn’t see.”
“It’s… okay…”
Is she alright?
She sounds a little upset.
You shake your head to get rid of those thoughts. It’s late, you’re tired, and it’s incredibly warm in this room!
You close your eyes and try your hardest to think of absolutely nothing, which is pretty difficult considering the awkward tension in the room and the horses next door getting it on.
Eventually it works, and you manage to fall into an uneasy sleep.
You blink yourself awake in the early hours of the morning, but keep your eyes closed. Surprisingly, you’re not feeling as sleepy as you probably should.
Last night was pretty tiring. In fact, yesterday as a whole was pretty tiring.
With a combination of not eating, getting attacked by a room-service pony, killing said room-service pony, fleeing the crime, walking across the entire city, being chased out of a bar, and the extraordinary awkwardness that occurred last night, you should be exhausted.
But you’re not.
You feel pretty good actually. The bed is incredibly uncomfortable, so your muscles feel a little sore, but other than that, you’re alright.
You lie on your stomach on top of the old spring mattress, silently praying that the bed will suddenly become comfortable and force you back to sleep.
For the first time in your life, or what you can remember to be your ‘life,’ you think that the room is a little chilly.
The general area of where you woke up a few days ago seems to be located on the equator, or on a plant dangerously close to the sun, as it is the hottest you believe you have ever felt. But now, inside a room with no air conditioning, you shiver.
Just once. Only once. It’s a little chilly, not freezing.
The answer is obvious, though. You feel nothing resting on your back.
You open your eyes and glance for a quick second over the side of the bed, where the blanket lies, crumpled up on the dirty floor.
Why do bad things happen to good people?
Numerous bad things have happened to you in a very short amount of time.
You would move to grab it, but it’s not worth it. You have no motivation to make such an action, so you just lie there and stare at the floor, wishing the blanket would magically levitate over to you.
Surprisingly enough, such a thing would be possible if Daring was a unicorn. But she isn’t. She’s just a pegasus that can barely fly.
When you think that, it’s not meant to be with contempt. Not at all. It’s merely an observation. She mustn’t be a very good flyer if she hurt her wing by crashing into a tree when no outside forces acted on her.
She flew into a tree.
She has the entire sky to fly in, an almost endless expanse, and she hits a damn tree.
Well, you probably shouldn’t think that her flying is all bad. Yesterday, she flew through a glass door while carry another being, and dropped them.
That was impressive.
Who knows? Maybe her flying will actually be useful for more than dropping ponies to their deaths one day.
You feel something soft and scruffy rub up against your side.
You know what it is, but you turn your head to face the other end of the bed, anyway.
Surely enough, there is Daring Do, world’s most notorious graverobber, famous writer, and ingenious professor, lying with her back rubbing against your side, her wings and legs tucked into her body.
Daring is incredibly soft. Her short fur feels funny against your skin, but for a pony that travels through jungles for a living, and as a result, rarely bathes, her fur is really soft!
Because she is facing the other way, you cannot see her face, but you just assume that she is asleep. It’s a safe assumption.
She mumbles something incoherent and kicks a foreleg before scooting herself backwards further into you.
Which is…
Well, adorable, really.
Despite how tough she appears to be, she is strangely adorable. But you would never call her that. You wouldn’t even think of calling her such a thing.
You have a feeling that if you were to, then you would end up like that stallion in the bar last night.
You enjoy your genitals very much. Very, very much.
The last thing you want is for a talking horse to kick them off of you because you gave her a compliment that she didn’t take kindly to.
You can just imagine that scenario in your head, and you subconsciously flinch at the thought.
You enjoy having genitals, and you plan on keeping them for a very long time.
Forever, actually.
So you best be careful what you say to the mare. She has recently proven just how dangerous she really is.
Getting on her bad side would be a huge mistake, especially considering she is your only current friend.
Though ‘friend’ could be used loosely.
You’re not sure exactly how much she really likes you. You wouldn’t imagine she likes you a lot.
Just the other day she was about to rip your throat out when the both of you ventured through the temple. And the both of you argue like you’re being paid for it.
You don’t know. Maybe she likes you? It’s a hopeful thought, you think, but it could be true. Stranger things have happened.
You think it’s safe to say that you like her. She has helped you out more than anyone in their right mind should, and she appears to be willing to continue to help.
She manages to get on every nerve you have multiple times a day for no more of a reason than that she simply can, but it’s kind of fun. What fun would it be if you agreed on everything all time?
Of course, you have yet to actually agree on anything, but you’ll get there one day.
You think back to last night, as it is among the only memories you have.
… Wow…
That’s your response to last night.
With the combination of the drinking (mainly done on Daring’s part), Marley’s comments, and the two ponies banging away next door, last night was…
Awkward.
You’re glad it’s over, though. Wouldn’t want to relive last night. Of all the memories you have acquired over the past few days, last night was not the best.
Definitely not the worst, but not the best either.
Now you don’t want the pegasus mare to wake up, lest you are forced to experience the awkwardness from the previous night all over again.
It’s like a nightmare. An awkward, not scary, never ending nightmare.
And who would want that? No one. No one at all.
You see the sun slowly rising over the horizon, thanks to the fact that the Earth spins. You witness such an event occurring thanks to the fact that you do not have a window.
Piece of shit motel.
Daring rolls onto her back, wiggling around in order to get comfortable, her wing rubbing against your side.
The feeling of all of those feathers against you tickles, but you don’t move away. You just lie there and look at her for a while.
Daring’s mouth is hanging wide open, and some drool is slowly sliding down her cheek, staining her fur.
Adorable.
You wish you had a camera. Surely such a photo would surely embarrass the sleeping mare.
But you don’t have one. You don’t have much of anything. The only things you actually possess are the clothes you are wearing right now and that’s it.
Oh well.
There will be times to embarrass her later.
May as well shower.
You slowly scoot yourself away from the sleeping pegasus, not wanting to wake her up for multiple reasons.
She does look kinda cute when she’s sleeping.
…
Hold up a second. Where did that thought come from?
…
Well, you can’t really argue with it, can you? She is cute when she’s not pissing you off.
…
Yeah, it’s shower time.
You attempt to get out of bed quicker than you originally wanted to, but the faster you go to bathe, the sooner you don’t have to be in the same room as Daring.
However, you don’t quite make it out.
“Noo,” Daring groans, rolling over and placing a foreleg loosely on your back, as though such an action is enough to keep you from going anywhere.
You stop moving and look at her.
Her face is a lot closer to yours all of a sudden, and you feel your cheeks warm up a little. She exhales and you feel her breath run over your face.
Her eyes are closed and her breathing is even, so you assume she is still sleeping.
You slowly move out of bed and allow her leg to slide across your scarred back and fall softly onto the mattress.
Without looking back, you walk into the bathroom.
==========
Well that was, without a doubt, the most disgusting shower you have ever had the displeasure of seeing.
At least you think it was. You’re memory is only a few days old.
You feel more dirty now than you did before you got in the shower, and that’s saying something.
The water was cold, the water pressure was pitiful, the shampoo probably wasn’t actually shampoo, and the towels smelled weird.
You hate this place.
If Daring didn’t kill that guy, you could be sleeping on a nice, soft mattress and eating room service in a well air conditioned room.
But no.
You walk back into the bedroom, towel around your waist.
Not surprisingly, Daring is still sleeping. Only this time, she is clutching a pillow in her forelegs and holding it tightly against her chest.
And she is snoring.
She wasn’t snoring earlier, which is strange, but whatever.
You open the door to your room and peek out into the hallway. Which is deserted.
However, there is a newspaper on the ground, which you decide to pick up. May as well read until Daring wakes up.
There is a chair at the desk on the other side of the room, so you may as well sit over there. You don’t want to sit on the bed and risk waking Daring up.
You take a seat and get comfortable.
The newspaper is two weeks old, but that doesn’t matter right now. You may as well read for a while.
==========
There is a nice, long article about the World Cup, which appears to be coming up. Many countries, it seems, still need to qualify, and the race is close, but you don’t care.
You’ve never heard of any of these countries.
But the article is pretty interesting, and it’s in english, so you read it.
You hear a sharp intake of air, commonly known as a ‘gasp,’ sound from the other side of the room.
Your heart jumps, being a little startled, and you drop the newspaper and look over at the bed.
Daring is sitting up, still on the mattress, panting, chest heaving, and her red eyes are very big.
“Are you okay?” you ask, debating with yourself if you should get up or stay where you are.
You could get up, but is that the best idea? Who knows what she could be thinking after last night?
Not you, that’s for sure.
But if you just sit here, she may take it as you not caring. And you care, of course. She’s your only friend.
Your indecisiveness causes you to simply remain seated as Daring responds.
“Y-Yeah,” she stammers, looking at you and blinking a few times. “Yeah. Fine.”
“You sure?” you ask, not believing her. People, or ponies, rather, don’t usually wake up from a good night’s rest sweating and out of breath.
She nods her head. “Bad dream, I guess…” she chuckles. “I don’t know. I can’t remember.”
Something feels off about that response, but you let it go.
“Sleep well?” You bend over to pick up the newspaper.
“Mm-hmm… It was alright. It’s nice to have a bed. How about you?”
You shrug. “Not too bad. It could be worse.” That certainly isn’t a lie. Spending time in a cell sucked a lot more than sleeping at Marley’s hotel.
“Heh heh,” she chuckles nervously. “Yeah. Could be worse.”
There is a moment of silence.
You wonder why she isn’t saying more. She usually has a lot to say, and she isn’t one to hold back, either. If she wants to say something, then she’s going to say it, and nothing will stop her.
If she’s angry, everyone around her is going to know one way or another. Same thing goes with if she’s happy, or if she is displaying any emotion at all. She’s not particularly subtle.
While you’re thinking about it, you may as well talk about last night. You have a lot of questions that need to be answered, and the sooner you get it over with, the better. If you wait too long, you’ll never be able to talk about it ever again.
“Daring?” you ask, breaking the silence.
The pegasus’ ears perk up and her wings ruffle as she looks back at you, her eyes getting a little smaller.
“Can I ask you something?”
“Uh, sure. Yeah, go ahead.” She shifts around a little bit on the mattress before settling down.
“Can we talk about last night?”
You wanted to further elaborate on that question, but before you got the chance to do so, Daring hops up and starts talking.
“Oh yeah!” she exclaims, standing up on the bed. “Last night was crazy, huh? We were drinking and running…” She looks away from you for a second before looking back, this time with a smile on her face. “In fact, I must have drank so much, I can’t remember a thing!”
You quirk an eyebrow suspiciously. “Really? Nothing?”
She chuckles a little and clears her throat, looking down at the ground. “A-ha. Nope! Not a thing.” She quickly hops out of bed and down onto the floor. “Oh well!”
She moves to get dressed for the morning. She puts on her shirt faster than one may expect a horse to be able to and flips her hat/helmet onto her head with the flick of a foreleg.
“I must have drank too much. It happens, you know.” She flips her helmet off from the floor and onto the top of her head. “I’m not used to drinking. And I’m a pegasus! And pegasi have a lower alcohol tolerance, so…”
Well shit. You wanted to talk about last night. You especially wanted to ask why she was drinking in the first place, but it’s a lost cause. You won’t get anywhere if she can’t remember.
“Why?” Daring asks, looking nervous and raising a foreleg slightly in the air. “Did… you want to talk about something that happened?”
You sigh. “No. I guess not.”
“Are you sure?”
“I guess so,” you nod after a moment of thinking.
“Well… alright.”
There is another moment of silence.
You still want to know why Daring was acting so strange. You can’t think of a particular reason why she would drink so much and act all weird when you got back here. It’s completely out of character for the grave-robbing mare.
You could still try to bring it up, but if she can’t remember, than the entire process will just make you more frustrated.
“Want some breakfast?” Daring asks, breaking the silence.
You remember you did not eat yesterday. All of yesterday, the entire day, nothing was consumed by you other than a small amount of alcohol.
All thoughts about Daring suddenly fly out of your head.
“Yes,” you respond simply.
Daring laughs at your quick and simple response.
“I thought so. Get dressed and follow me!”
==========
“Bon appetite!”
A few pancakes already drenched in syrup flop onto your plate, causing the sticky substance to fly out in all directions, including getting a little on you.
An old camel takes a couple step to where Daring is sitting and drops a few pancakes on her plate as well, with similar results. Marley then walks to the back of the room and disappears behind a door.
The room you are in is most likely the motel’s dining room. Though, ‘dining room’ is too generous of a term, it seems. There is only table in the entire room with four chairs. And two of those chairs are broken.
You take a moment to look down at your plate. The pancakes look pretty good, and they smell like pancakes too.
Which genuinely surprises you.
You look up at Daring, who is curiously gazing at her plate, seemingly lost in thought. Probably wondering if it’s safe to eat or not. Probably.
You’re thinking the same thing. Marley does not seem like the most stable of individuals, so him making you food does not seem like the best of ideas.
“I thought we weren’t eating here,” you say, causing the pegasus to look up at you. For some reason, when her big red eyes connect with yours, your heart feels heavy. But only for a second.
“Well, we don’t really have any choices, do we?” she asks.
You sigh. “No. Guess not. Which is entirely your fault, by the way.”
“My fault?”
Before you can elaborate further on your point, which you have had plenty of times to mull over in your head due to the long day yesterday and lack of food, Marley comes back in, carrying a tray on his back.
“Now, I wants you two ta eat up, now!” he yells, placing a glass of orange juice in front of you and and then Daring. “An’ don’t’cha think about leaving this here table ‘til all your food is gone.”
Daring chuckles. “Well, I certainly won’t turn down on offer for food!” She glances at you out of the corner of her eye. “And I know he won’t either?” she exclaims, gesturing to you.
Fuck
Any plans you may have had of avoiding Marley’s pancakes in favor of going literally anywhere else for breakfast have been shot.
You swallow nervously. “Yeah, Marey. This looks great! Thank you.”
“Aww,” Marley says bashfully. “No need ta thank me, young ‘in. It’s the least I could do after y’all gave me that money.”
Daring waves a hoof in the air. “Don’t sweat it, Marley. It was a gift, alright? Don’t feel like you need to repay us.”
“Shucks, Ms. Do. Breakfast is the least I could do!”
Your stomach rumbles, and you know that if you don’t begin eating soon, your body will eat itself. And who would want that to happen?
You take a big mouthful of pancake and swallow.
The taste is actually pretty good. It’s better than most food you have eaten since you woke up in the forest, so you have no room to complain.
“Mmm!” Daring says with a mouthful of pancakes, syrup dripping off of her chin. She swallows. “These are great, Marley, but there are so many! Why do you want us to finish them all?” She takes another bite.
“Oh-ho!” Marley laughs. “Don’t ya try ‘n be sly with me now, Ms. Do. Mm-hmm. I heard yas last night in there!” He points in the general direction of your room.
Your face suddenly lights itself on fire as Daring begins choking on her food. She picks up her juice and starts drinking quickly, but Marley continues without a care.
“Y’all were up very late ‘n must’ve exhausted yourselves!”
Sweet merciful Jesus take me now!
Unfortunately, you know exactly what he is referring to. Of course, there is a small chance he heard Daring yelling at you last night, but you doubt that is what he is referring to.
“Why, the two of yas were up so darn late, making all sorts o’ ruckus, I was con-sid-rin gettin’ the hose!”
He laughs to himself. Loudly. And bangs a hoof on the table.
You swallow and look at Daring, who is already looking back at you. Her eyes are the smallest you’ve ever seen them, her ears are flat, her wings are extended to either side of her, and her face is entirely red.
Well… looks like I didn’t have to embarrass Daring after all. Marley did it for me.
Daring suddenly snaps out of her stupor and turns frantically to Marley. “M-Marley, no! No! That wasn’t us!”
“Aww, now don’t be shy now, darlin’! You’re young and in love. It’s only natural!”
Your face is unreasonably warm. Maybe you’re sick?
“But that wasn’t us! There were these ponies next door, see? And they-”
“Now don’t you try ‘n lie ta me Ms. Do. I may be old, but I can hear just fine. ‘Sides, you two’s the only guests in this entire buildin’. Now, you two eat up!” He begins to walk away. “Be a shame to let that there food go to the rats again.”
Marley walks to the back and disappears out the back door.
You are now officially aware that Marley’s sole purpose, the only reason for that camel’s existence in this world, is to make every situation he is involved in as awkward as physically and emotionally possible.
It’s like he was born without common sense. Who the hell in their right mind would bring something like that up?!
Even if he did hear the two of you… doing that, there is no reason to bring it up! Especially not at the breakfast table!
You look at Daring, who is already looking back at you. In the next second, the both of you look down at your plates, faces red.
You begin to eat again, and hear Daring resume as well.
“Heh,” she chuckles nervously after a few moments of silence, “Marley… that crazy old camel…”
“Ha,” you fake-laugh back, “yeah.”
There is no more talking for the rest of breakfast.
==========
You’re back in the bedroom, gathering any personables you may have with you.
Which is nothing. Only Daring brought stuff. But she told you to carry the bag with the idols in it, so you do.
They’re heavier than they look. They’re not even a foot tall, and definitely not a foot wide. They look like they could weigh five pounds at most.
But if feels like you’re carrying at least thirty pounds worth of magical shit over your shoulder.
Not that you particularly mind. Getting these idols back to Daring’s boss means that you get to go home, so carrying them for a while is something you can suffer through.
The both of you walk out of the room and into the lobby.
“Hey Marley!” Daring yells, standing up on her hind legs and leaning on his desk. “Get out here, you old geezer!”
“Wassat?” you hear him yell back, along with what sounds like a pan drop to the floor and spin around. “Who dat, there?”
Daring rolls her eyes. “The only guests you’ve ever had! We’re checking out!”
The old camel hobbles out of the back room, and you wonder what he’s always doing back there. And then you decide that it is best you don’t know.
“Checkin’ out? Y’all jus’ got here!”
Daring nods. “Yeah, well, we’re leaving. Probably won’t be back, either. Not for a while, anyway. We really gotta get going.”
“Well alright, child. I won’t keep ya! Good luck with whatever it is you kids do these days.”
“Thanks, Marley.” Daring places the room key on the desk. “As long as everything goes according to plan, it should be smooth sailing.”
Daring has a plan?
Well that’s good. You didn’t know she had one, as she doesn’t usually seem to have one. She seems just to tackle things as they come along, but this is a good change of pace.
“You two lovebirds run along, now!” Marley yells, laughing.
You roll your eyes and assume Daring does as well, though you don’t look to check.
“It was great seeing you, Marley. It’s about time we hit the road.”
“Well alright. Come back and visit, now! Y’hear?”
“We will! Bye, Marley!”
The both of you turn to leave the motel and prepare to go out in public once more. It probably wouldn’t be the best idea to just waltz along the main roads, as you are easily distinguishable in a crowd.
“And you be good to Ms. Do, now!” Marley calls after you.
“I will!” you respond, not wanting to argue anymore and just wanting to leave.
The second you step out of the building you feel excitement course through you. One step closer to going home and getting the hell out of here. Just the thought of it makes you want to jump for joy!
Daring knows the location of the last artifact, presumably, so all you have to do is go and pick it up! Easy!
You got the elephant and donkey, now it’s time for the eagle of… whatever. You can’t remember it’s official name, but who cares?!
Your nightmare is almost over!
You smile.
“Hey! Hurry up!” you hear. You look down and see Daring trot in front of you. “We have a zeppelin to catch!”
You chuckle, still smiling, on your little emotional high. “Alright!
It’s not even the “moderately confused” state you have been in since waking up a few days ago. You have finally entered the “advanced confused” state.
It’s about time.
Why is Daring trying to find a zeppelin? Isn’t that mode of transportation a little outdated? You know what a zeppelin is, and when that image happens to pop itself into your brain, images of events that happened 100 years ago accompany it.
May as well ask her.
“Daring?” you ask, getting her attention as you briskly walk through the crowded streets of the still unnamed city. She looks up at you with her red eyes as you continue to walk. “Why are we trying to find a zeppelin? Isn’t that a little… outdated? And dangerous?”
She quirks an eyebrow. “What are you talking about, dude? They were just invented a few years ago. They’re practically brand new! It’s state of the art technology. Quickest and safest way to travel without having to do it yourself.”
Well that doesn’t seem right.
“Are you sure?” you ask.
“Uh, yeah. Did you not hear me? It’s state of the art technology! And it sure as hell makes my job a lot easier. Can you imagine flying over 400 miles nonstop?”
“No. I can’t. I don’t have wings… Why nonstop?”
“‘Cause where we’re going next is across the sea, dummy. If I was gonna fly over that by myself, I’d be exhausted. And it’s not like I could land in the water and relax for a bit, due to the fact that ponies don’t float. Not like me flying was an option anyway, considering you can’t fly.” She continues walking and adds after a moment, “And there’s no way I can carry your fat ass.”
Classic Daring.
“Why don’t we go in a plane?” Planes are easily faster than zeppelins, and it would put your mind at ease knowing you’re in a plane rather than a zeppelin. Despite your terrible memory, the thought of zeppelins is associated with fire and screaming.
Daring looks at you, confusion evident in her face. “What’s a plane?”
“What’s a plane?” you repeat, half-wondering the same thing. “It’s a… you know… it’s a plane! It flies and has wings… you know what? Forget I said anything.”
“Don’t worry,” she assures. “I forget most of the crap you say, anyway.”
You roll your eyes as the both of you continue to venture through the growing crowds in this unnamed city.
==========
It has gotten a lot warmer.
Hotter.
It’s only a matter of time before you break into a sweat. Again.
Fuck this city and the sun!
The both of you have been walking for quite some time, much to your legs’ dismay. Over the past few days, you have done more walking than you think you ever have.
And that very well may be true. It’s not everyday that one walks across an entire city then back again.
“Where are we going?” you ask, out of breath. You didn’t realize how tired you sounded until right now.
“Airport,” Daring replies simply, not looking at you.
You nod and look back into the street.
“Where is the airport?” you ask, wanting to know when your torment will be one step closer to finally being over.
“Where we are going.”
You came so close to face-palming right there. You should’ve expected an answer like that from Daring.
“No shit. I asked ‘Where is the airport?’ not ‘What is the airport?’”
“How should I know? Does it look like I live here?” she asks, looking angrily back up at you.
Something you probably have to consider is that it is very hot and dry where you are right now, and if you’re tired, Daring most likely is as well. It would be for the best if the both of you would just stop arguing for a bit. Or just stop talking in general.
But in your deteriorating mental state, that is not an option.
“Yeah, actually,” you respond. “You knew about the hotel we stayed in, the motel, and the owner of the motel. You may not live here, but you know the area pretty damn well.”
Jesus, Daring, it’s a simple question! Why do you have to make the smallest things so difficult for me?!
“Doesn’t mean I’ve ever been the damn airport!” she growls at you. “Moron.”
You restrain yourself from using profanity. Daring is your friend, and it is best to stay that way. The past few days have been incredibly exhausting and stressful. Surely, once you buy your plane - no, wait, ‘zeppelin’ ticket, then you can just sit and relax all day.
Just the thought of sitting down and doing nothing for an entire day is nearly orgasmic. You don’t think you have been on the inside of a zeppelin before, but you hope it’s nice.
Also, with all that money you… ‘acquired,’ from that douche a couple days ago, you should easily be able to get first class tickets.
Ooh, maybe they have food on the zeppelin that isn’t accompanied with awkward interruptions from a senile camel! How lovely!
It’s also a nice day to go flying. You can just look out the windows, sip some wine like the classy gentleman you are, and relax. It’d be cool seeing the city from the air. And the ocean too, as Daring said you will be flying over it.
However, knowing you and your luck, there will be an assassin on the zeppelin disguised as a ceiling fan or some shit and he will try to kill you.
He will come fairly close but ultimately fail before being thrown out of the zeppelin from an incredible height, where he will fall hundreds of feet to his dramatic demise.
Or something like that. Something weird is bound to happen in the next few hours. God knows something will.
God is probably getting a big kick out of your life right now. It’s like a god damn movie or a book, and he can’t wait for the next chapter! But who could! It’s just too good!
All of these sudden thoughts are beginning to turn morbid. What if the assassin doesn’t use a clever disguise, but instead is just flying the blimp? He could take you anywhere he wants. Including straight into the ground… or ocean.
Can you swim? You can’t remember. Maybe. Probably. You think you can swim. Of course, you won’t know until you try, but if you try, you wouldn’t mind it being in a nice, refreshing, clean swimming pool at some high-rated hotel.
But what if the staff of that hotel is in on the plot to kill you?
Why is there a plot to kill you? Or why does there seem to be? Sure, you’re taller than everyone else, but do that many animals really have an inferiority complex?
Probably not, but it’s a possibility. Considering that you cannot remember who you are, you obviously don’t know why talking animals want to harm you.
Who is running this plot to kill you? Someone out there and his buddies are trying to get rid of you, but who?
Is Daring in on this plot?
Sure, she’s helped you thus far, but is that just an attempt to gain your trust until she turns on you?
Oh God, you’re so confused and paranoid. And hot. And thirsty!
“Hey!” Daring shouts at you, startling and causing you to jump a little.
Eyes wide and just now becoming aware that you are sweating, you quickly scan around you until you see the familiar pegasus floating at eye-level next to you. She reaches out a hoof and places it on your shoulder.
“W-What?” you stutter, heart beating fast.
“Are you alright?” she asks, her face rather too close to yours for a moment before she backs up, removing her leg from your shoulder. “I was talking but you didn’t respond and I looked over and you were all… I don’t know, like nervous.”
“Nervous?”
“Yeah. You’re sweating and breathing real heavy. Are you OK? Need to sit down?”
One part of you wonders why Daring offered to stop for a bit. This is the first time she has done such a thing, which is odd, but you’re not gonna question it right now.
A second part of you wants to sit down, but thinks it’s just so Daring can make fun of you. If you stop, she will surely use whatever insult she can against you in her ill attempts at being funny.
Which she is not, and never will be.
And a third part of you just wants to keep going. The sooner you get there the better. But there is no telling where the airport even is!
…
Yeah, you’re gonna sit down.
“Yeah, can we stop for a minute?” you ask.
Daring lands, all four hooves make a ‘clop’-ing sound when they hit the pavement. She looks up to you and smiles. “No problem!”
‘No problem?’ Really? Doesn’t sound like something Daring would say about stopping in the middle of an ‘adventure.’
“There’s a cafe in there,” she says, gesturing to one of the buildings. “Let’s get some water.”
Water sounds lovely right now, and the both of you move off the street and enter one of the many shops along the road.
==========
It’s a pretty small cafe, and not very crowded at this time. There is a counter at the far end where you can order drinks and sandwiches and there are various tables for you to sit at. It’s pretty nice, and definitely cooler in here than outside.
“I’ll get us something,” Daring says, trotting to the other end of the restaurant. “Just pick a table.”
It’s easy to find one as almost all of them are open, and you simply take a seat and look out the window into the dwindling morning traffic.
Some ponies and griffons and zebras and whatever else that may be out there glance over at you but most just continue on their way.
You remember Daring told you that she has enemies. A lot of enemies, actually. Could the ones that attacked you instead be after her? And you’re just caught in the crossfire?
Maybe. But unlikely. You got your back ripped open by some zebra but Daring never actually met the guy, before. So you don’t think they’re after her. If they were then they probably would’ve done some weird shit to her instead of you.
But then that means they’re solely after you.
For what?!
You place your head in your hands.
You probably shouldn’t trust anyone for a while. Not that you have been, but you do listen to Daring.
Why is she helping you? Have you ever found a solid answer to that question? Does she want something from you?
You’re giving yourself a headache.
“Hey,” a familiar voice cuts in, followed by a familiar hoof to the shoulder, effectively interrupting your thoughts. You look to your side and see Daring next to you. “You sure you’re alright?”
You nod and pick up a bottle of water from the table. You take a few gulps before putting it back down and clearing your throat. “Yeah.”
Daring rolls her eyes and sits across from you. She obviously thinks something is wrong but she she isn’t asking you about it. Not yet.
Daring takes a sip of water. “We’re no more than an hour or two from the airport. Once we get there we can just hop on, sit down, and relax.”
That sounds very good right about now. After the past few days you could really use some time to just sit and think about nothing.
“You sure you’re good?” she asks.
“Fine!” you snap, startling her. Realizing how loud you were, you shrink in your seat a bit before muttering, “I’m fine.”
Daring doesn’t say anything to you after that. She definitely thinks something is wrong with you and she clearly wants to know what. Unfortunately, she is part of the problem, but you can’t tell her that. That conversation probably wouldn’t be a good one.
You feel bad for snapping like you did, especially in public, but it happened. You’ll apologize later, of course, but there’s just too much going on in your mind right now for that.
“We should go,” Daring says in a quieter tone than usual. “The zeppelin will leave with or without us. Best make sure we’re on it when they take off.”
You nod and exit the cafe. It was nice to have that little break as you feel slightly refreshed, which is better than nothing.
The both of you venture back outside into the heat and slightly less crowded streets, continuing on your journey.
==========
You left the motel a couple of hours ago, and as the day has progressed, the streets have become slightly less and less crowded.
It’s easier to see where you’re going and much easier to walk around when you don’t have to constantly worry about running someone over.
“Look up there,” Daring commands. You look down at her and see she is looking up into the sky. There is hardly a reason to look up into the sky unless one wishes to see the clouds or go blind, but you look up anyway.
“That’s a zeppelin,” you observe out loud, seeing the giant blimp-like structure drift lazily through the sky.
“No shit.”
“Where did it take off from?”
“The airport. It’s just a dozen or so blocks from here, so we should get there pretty soon.”
Well it’s about time. The sooner you get there the sooner you can get out of this heat. And this entire damn country! Why is it so hot here?!
Who the hell built a city right on the equator?! You want to find whoever thought this was a good idea and punch them in the mouth.
However, you probably will never get the chance as that individual is probably dead. Which is the only fate that cruel individual deserves. It’s just a shame you were unable to assist in his death in some way.
Oh well. Surely there will plenty of creatures that you will feel the need to attack before this journey has reached an end.
Most of the journey is made in silence
==========
“Ugh-ugh-ugh!” Daring coughs loudly and violently. It’s one of those kind of coughs where you can hear the air expelling deep from their chest. “Ugh-ugh-ugh!”
“You alright?” you ask, a little concerned.
“Ahem! Yeah, yeah. Just got something caught in my throat.”
“Need some water?” you ask, offering her your bottle.
She clears her throat again. “No, I’m fine.”
Alright then.
==========
Well, you’re here… You think.
You can see the airport. You certainly thinks it’s an airport, at least. There is a giant building a few hundred yards in front of you with dozens of aircraft sitting around it.
Only thing that stands between you and such aircraft is a fence.
And that’s it.
There is no guard patrolling. There is no emergency system. There is just a fence and a couple signs, like that will be enough to keep you two from entering.
“Here we are,” Daring says, smiling.
“Here we are.”
“This is called an ‘airport.’ It’s where-”
“I know what it is,” you interject, cutting her off before she gets a good chance to make fun of you.
“Yeah, you know everything, don’t you?”
She smiles at you. It’s one of those ‘Ha! I’m better than you so do something about it!’ smiles she is constantly wearing. She jumps into the air and spreads her wings.
The act looks very… nice. Nice is a good word. She looks good when she is flying like she is. Majestic, really, if such a word could possibly be used to describe someone such as Daring.
You like it when she spreads her wings out. You don’t want to say ‘pretty,’ but that really is the best word for it. She looks… pretty… when she’s flying, of course. And only then.
You would never tell Daring that she was ‘pretty,’ though. She’d probably kick you in the nuts.
Wait, what is she doing?
You shake your head rapidly to clear those thoughts away and get back into reality.
“What are you doing?” you ask, looking up at Daring.
“What do you mean, ‘What am I doing?’ What does it look like? I’m hopping the fence to the airport.”
“But you can’t do that?”
“Why not?”
You point to a sign. “It says ‘Do Not Enter.’”
You look at her, and she looks hard back at you. Neither of you look away. You’re in a standoff with this pony and you’re prepared to walk away the victor…
After only a few short moments the both of you start to laugh.
“Oh! That was a good one,” Daring laughs, flying back down. “You’re funny. Alright now, come on. Let’s stop wasting time and get over this thing.”
One thing you have noticed is that there are no guards here. Literally, not a single guard or airport employee has been posted anywhere near this fence.
The only thing left guarding this area is a sign. A sign that you easily have the ability to ignore.
Daring easily has the ability to levitate over the fence, but you don’t. Looks like you’re gonna have to climb.
You don’t remember climbing anything in your life, but surely you have. How hard could it be? It mustn’t be all that difficult, now.
Before you can even make an attempt to grab onto the fence, you feel a pair of legs wrap under your armpits and tightly around your chest.
And then you’re flying.
You know what’s happening, of course. How else could you be flying? But the action in itself is still startling as Daring’s spontaneous personality takes over and thus not giving you a proper warning.
You kick your legs out in a moment of panic. “What are you doing?” you ask rather loudly.
“Damn you’re heavy,” is her simple reply. It doesn’t answer the question exactly, but alright. You’ll take what you can get.
You instinctively kick your feet towards the fence as you get higher and higher, wanting to be attached the something solid and safely implanted into the ground.
“Stop moving, you dolt! I’m going to drop you!”
Just as the top of the fence comes up to your waist, you are finally able to swing your legs over and get your feet on top of it.
You almost feel relieved, but you’re still rather high in the air.
You feel Daring fly forward a little, pushing you over. And that’s when your feet disconnect.
And the ground gets really close really fast. Inevitably, you hit the Earth rather hard, but not as hard as you anticipated.
“Ow,” you say the word, showing that you’re kind of hurt but still fine enough to complain. “What the hell, Daring?” You begin to rise to your feet.
“What the hell were you thinking?” she asks, sounding angry, before flying down next to you.
“Me? What the hell were you thinking?! You can’t just pick someone up like that! I’m afraid of heights!”
Which is something you just now learned about yourself.
“Are you kidding me?” she deadpans. “I only went up like 15 feet, at most. That’s not high at all! How are you supposed to get on a zeppelin if you can’t even climb a fence?!”
"Simple. I expect the zeppelin to carry me smoothly to our destination, and not just grab me and go, only to drop me a few moments later."
You really hope your zeppelin ride turns out better than that.
“You’re welcome, by the way,” she snorts, sticking her nose in the air and turning her back to you.
“I don’t recall thanking you,” you respond, dusting yourself off.
“I noticed, you ungrateful moron.”
Isn’t bickering with Daring fun? It’s like the only thing the both of you have in common is that you constantly disagree with each other.
Good times.
The both of you begin to move across a rather large, open field, fraught with zeppelins and balloons and all kinds of weird flying machines.
“Shouldn’t we be sneaking?” you ask, looking around nervously for any guards.
“Hmm? Oh, no. We’re good. I’ve done this hundreds of times.”
“Hundreds?”
“Yep! I’ve never payed for a zeppelin ticket in my whole life! Yet, I still manage to consistently travel the world on ‘em!”
That’s… pretty impressive, actually.
“How do you know which one we’re supposed to get on?” you ask, noticing the large amount of zeppelins there actually are. All across the massive field, there are probably a total of ten, any of them could be going anywhere.
“According to the flight schedules, the one we need to get on will be leaving at 2:15 p.m. from gate E.” She looks around right quick before her ears perk up and she smiles as though she just made an important discovery. “A-ha! There it is!”
She points a yellow-ish hoof towards a zeppelin slightly to your left and hundreds of meters away.
“How are we supposed to get over there?”
Daring looks at you and shrugs. “Walking? How else would you get anywhere?”
Smartass.
“Shit!” she exclaims. “They’re already boarding! C’mon, let’s go!”
She grips your arm with both of her forelegs and flaps her wings, propelling the both of you in the direction of your ride.
The both of you are outside your designated ride. Considering it is not what most people would call, “legal,” to board a zeppelin without tickets, you and your winged companion are crouching behind the giant flying death-box.
How you haven’t been spotted seems to be a miracle, but this area doesn’t seem to be heavily guarded for whatever reason.
Zeppelins give you a very uneasy feeling, for some reason. It’s probably nothing, though. Most things seem to give you that feeling.
You’ve basically had that feeling since waking up in the jungle a few days ago. You’ve grown uncomfortably used to it.
Crossing the open and active airfield was actually pretty easy. There were no security cameras, no security guards… no security whatsoever, really.
Besides that sign, of course, but that didn’t seem to stop you and Daring from hopping that fence and coming across now, did it?
No. It did not.
It should worry you that security is so loose here, but at this moment it’s a very good thing. Having to dodge more obstacles than absolutely necessary is not something that sounds especially appealing right now.
In fact, if you wouldn’t mind if you never had to dodge another sort of obstacle ever again, ever; whether it be guards, murderers, booby traps, or whatever. The fewer the better, as they say.
It is troubling, though, that anyone can do what you are doing. Think about it. Anyone can walk across the active runway. Anyone can sneak onto a zeppelin.
One of these days something really bad is gonna happen, then security will finally be taken seriously.
Oh well. Not your problem.
“The best way to get in is the staff bathroom in the very back,” Daring says, not whispers. One would think that when attempting to “sneak” somewhere, someone should “speak quietly” or “shut the hell up.”
But, of course, it’s Daring. And she’s gonna do whatever she does and that’s just about that.
Not that you really have a problem with that; her personality, that is.
The more you stay around her, the more she seems to be growing on you. She’s a pretty cool pony… sometimes.
She knows how to get on your nerves a little too well, especially for someone you only recently met, but you really like that.
If the both of you agreed on everything, what would you talk about? What would you do all the time if not argue? You’re not sure.
The good thing is that the both of you have yet to find anything you agree on, aside from the fact that Kiduttaa is an asshole, but everyone can see that.
No, Daring and you don’t really get along well, but you really like her, and you wouldn’t have it any other way.
Her straightforwardness is something you admire, and you love that she is not afraid to take chances. Of course, that has gotten the both of you in quite a decent amount of trouble, and you guarantee something very bad is gonna happen to either you or her because of it.
You love that she’s doesn’t back down from a challenge and that she’s not afraid of anything. Nothing at all.
She’d trot up to Stalin himself and smack him across the mouth if she wanted to.
You can’t say the same for yourself. Ever since you got here, fear is something you have really gotten to know.
The only thing that seems to worry your yellow companion is that weird French pony she was telling you about. And that worries you, too, for a number of reasons, but that shouldn’t be a problem.
What are the chances of running into that guy? Or the rest of those dudes she was telling you about at the bar?
Little to none, hopefully, but anything can happen. You’ve really come to believe that in the past few days.
Whatever. At least you’re with Daring, now, and you pray that things will stay that way.
“Why are you staring at me?” Daring asks, her red eyes looking into yours, her cheeks slightly pink.
Was I staring?
Yes. You were staring.
I wasn’t staring.
“I wasn’t staring,” you say, looking away.
“Yeah? Then what do you call it when someone looks at you for a really long time without saying anything and doesn’t blink?”
Think… Think! You’re smart! Say something witty! Say something witty!
“I call it ‘mind your own damn business’,” you respond, your face feeling warmer than it already is.
Way to be clever, you moron!
And there’s another thing about Daring; she’s quick. Quicker than you, usually, but you can give her a run for her bits on a good day.
Today is just not a good day. You can feel it already.
Daring finds your response rather humorous, and takes a few moments to laugh. Whether it be at your statement, or you, or both, you cannot tell.
“Aw, man,” she chuckles, regaining her composure. “I love you, Jay. I really do.”
You roll your eyes, partially at her laughing and partially at the name ‘Jay.’ It doesn’t feel right when she calls you that. “Yeah, I bet. What’s the plan, now?”
The both of you are standing towards the back of the zeppelin. The only way in seems to be a rather small window high above you. For only a second, you wonder how you’re supposed to make it up there.
Then the answer wraps her forelegs around your chest and under your armpits and starts flying again.
“Don’t move around this time,” she commands, her voice strained. “As if lifting your fat ass isn’t hard enough already.”
Nothing witty or clever comes to mind, so you choose not to respond. It’s a slow day. Everyone has them sometimes.
Daring flaps hard, her wings making an easy to hear *whoosh* sound with every motion, and you get a little closer to the window every second.
The window looked really small from the ground, and now that you have almost reached it, you can confirm that it is really small.
Smaller than you thought. It’s big enough for Daring, but for you? Maybe not.
“Open the window!” she pants. “Open the window! Quickly!”
“But you told me not to move.”
“I’m not in the mood right now, Jay! Open the window or I’m gonna open your skull!”
You’re not usually threatened by the small, yellow mare, but she is holding you very high over a very hard surface. It would be best if she did not drop you.
The window opens with one easy push of the hand. One may expect the window to be locked, but apparently not. It doesn’t seem like anyone around here takes security seriously.
What is wrong with these ponies?!
You shouldn’t feel so upset about the lack of security, but you are. This is just ridiculous.
Daring, eager to get rid of the extra weight, practically throws you at the window once you get both arms inside. The lack of Daring holding you up is surprising, as you suddenly have to support your full weight once again.
You slowly pull yourself up and mostly through the window before flopping onto the floor. Daring is quick to follow you and she shuts the window behind her.
“Good thing this room is empty,” you say, observing the bathroom and its’ lack of a user.
Daring chuckles. “Yeah. One time I came in and there was some guy already in here. I surprised him so bad he… ha ha… well, I definitely surprised him, I’ll tell you that. I’ll let you infer the rest.”
You don’t want to think of other random animals shitting themselves right now.
“Where do we go from here? We don’t look like we’re part of the crew.”
Daring rolls her big red eyes. “Well, you don’t, that’s for sure. You don’t look like anything.”
She pauses for a moment, as though she is expecting you to say something. Which you don’t.
Noticing the silence, she continues. “We gotta get to the lobby. Once we’re there, we can just chill on one of the couches or something.”
“How do we get there?”
“Easy. It’s just through the kitchen.”
You let out a breath.
“The kitchen?” you ask, incredulously.
“Eeyup.”
“I assume the kitchen will be occupied?”
“Uh, duh. Where else would the chefs make the food?”
You rub your forehead and clear your throat. “How the hell are we supposed to get through there without being spotted?”
“It’s called ‘sneaking’.”
You have just about had it with Daring’s shit today, and it’s barely noon.
“And how exactly do you expect me to get through there unnoticed?”
Daring shrugs. “I don’t know. We’re gonna have to go in there and find out.”
As much as you would love to argue right now, following Daring seems to be the only option you have, as it always is. It’s not like you can leave now, considering the exit is a window that drops to your death.
And you have come too far already to die by falling out a bathroom window.
“Let’s go,” Daring whispers to you, opening the door slightly and creeping out. You duck down and follow behind her.
The kitchen, for the moment, is empty. It’s a small area for a kitchen, but it probably works well enough. There are stoves and a few push carts on the side of the room used to deliver the food out to the passengers.
You assume the staff is still bringing stuff on board, or else they’d be in here. How fortuitous for you.
As that thought crosses your mind, the door on the far end of the room opens.
Before you can register what is fully happening and curse your luck, a yellow hoof grips your collar and yanks you behind one of the food carts.
You pull your knees into your chest and ball up as much as possible, trying to shrink yourself.
Daring huddles close to you as the sounds of hooves fill the room. You can feel Daring’s wing rub against your side and her head pushing on your shoulder as she tries to duck down too.
Shit! Great plan, Daring.
You glance over at her and she puts a hoof to her lips, signalling for you to stay quiet. Then she tries to scoot herself even closer to you, as if that were possible.
By the sounds of it, it is only one pony. Ponies have four legs, so it sometimes sounds like there are more than there are, but you’ve gotten used to it. Only one guy.
For a brief moment, you try to figure out a good way to distract him, but come up with nothing.
Maybe you can kill him.
No, better not.
Luckily, you don’t have to be creative or allow your mind to contemplate murder as the pony opens the door he came in from and exits.
Daring is quick to move away from you and towards the door. “Come on,” she hisses as you lazily rise back to your feet.
You quickly move towards the door and the both of you exit, closing the door behind you as to avoid any suspicion. At least, that’s the idea.
The lobby you have entered is just starting to get full of passengers, and luckily, none of them appear to have noticed you or Daring.
Thank God for that.
Not that it would have really mattered, anyway. If they saw you, they’d just assume you were waiters or something.
The lobby is very nice. There are plenty of sofas and tables with chairs. This place is full of places just to sit and relax.
Your kind of place.
There’s even a bar towards the end of the lobby, which you may be stopping by later, and Daring with you. She claims not to drink much, but your memory of last night contradicts that.
It’s a miracle she didn’t wake up with a hangover. She seemed pretty out of it last night.
What a lightweight.
She really is. She didn’t have so much to drink that she should have been that drunk. So, either she’s a lightweight or she wasn’t actually drunk and was just pretending.
You can think about that later. Best to get settled in, now, while there are still seats available.
You look forward to nice, long, relaxing ride.
“Let’s get that sofa over there before it’s taken!” Daring says rather loudly, this time getting a few ponies’ attention.
Daring bolts over to the end of the zeppelin and dives, flopping onto the sofa right next to the window.
“Ahh,” she sighs, relaxing. “It’s good to sit down again.”
You walk over, being careful not to trip on anypony. There is a stack of newspapers on a table you pass, and you decide to grab one. This ride is supposed to be rather long, so you may as well do something besides sleep and argue with your infamous, grave-robbing friend.
“I can’t believe that worked,” you say, taking a seat next to Daring and getting yourself comfortable.
“Pfft!” she scoffs. “Of course it worked! Who do you think you’re dealing with, here?”
“Someone who brags too much.”
“There’s no such thing as bragging ‘too much’ as long as you can back it up. Which, I can.”
“Yeah, yeah.” You open your paper and scan the pages.
“Now, Jay, it’s smooth sailing from here on out!”
You really wish she hadn’t said that. You want to believe her, but you can’t. Especially not after she just said that.
I can’t believe she would say that.
She jinxed it. She jinxed everything. Something terrible is gonna happen soon, you just know it.
“Wake me up when they start bringing food around, ‘k?” she asks, taking off her pith helmet and placing it on the table in front of the sofa.
“Sure.”
Despite the sofa being rather large, and thus, there is plenty of room to lie down fully, she turns herself so that she is leaning against you; her head resting on your shoulder.
Why doesn’t she just lie down if she wants to sleep? It’s probably more comfortable, and you won’t bother her by moving around that way.
You don’t mind it, though. It’s just rather strange that she would choose to do that. As long as she’s comfortable and happy, so are you.
==========
You feel Daring shift her head a little bit on your shoulder as she nuzzles your neck. The feeling of her fur on you is strange, as though she is tickling you. The feeling definitely makes it harder for you to concentrate on reading.
You try to glance down at her but that proves difficult, as her head is in the way. Just by moving your eyes, you can see that her eyes are closed and a small smile is on her face.
She probably hasn’t fallen asleep yet. She’s only been lying like that for a few minutes. The zeppelin hasn’t even taken off.
You shift around a little bit to get a little more comfy before turning back to the paper.
For whatever reason, you find it hard to concentrate.
==========
Daring is really smart, you think while reading the paper but not taking in any of the information. She has proven that to you on multiple occasions.
For one, you would never have thought to take a zeppelin to wherever the hell else you were gonna go. You would’ve tried walking there or something.
But that’s probably due to the fact that you didn’t even know they existed until this morning.
She also broke out of that prison cell Kiduttaa had you in. You don’t have a clue how, but she did it.
She’s smart, she’s ingenuitive, she’s funny.
And she’s pretty.
“Watch it!” she yelps, scooting a bit away from you. “You trying to crush my wing or something?”
You turn your attention from your paper and to Daring for the first time since you sat down. “What?”
“You gotta be more careful, dude. Wings are sensitive, you know, so that means you shouldn’t try to crush them between you and the damn couch.”
“Then don’t wrap your wing around me,” you respond simply. She was the one who fell asleep on you.
“Yeah right! Why the hell would I ever do that?” she asks harshly.
“Jesus, Daring, I don’t know. You done? I’m trying to-”
“No.”
“No?”
“What?” She glances at you before looking to the other side of the room. “No, not you, Jay. Not…”
“What is it?” you ask quietly, scanning the room as well. You don’t know what she’s looking for, but you’re trying to help out anyway.
“I’ll be right back.” She begins to get up and tilts her helmet down more over her face.
“Where are you going?” you ask, sounding worried.
“Don’t move,” she glances back at you before leaving.
She trots off into the crowd of passengers who are finally getting settled. Your eyes follow Daring as she trots away before she disappears behind a door.
Oh shit. Something’s going down.
You knew something bad was going to happen. It just had to. Everything was too easy for you this morning.
You don’t know what to do. Should you keep looking around? Should you hide?
Daring told you to stay, and you trust her. So you’ll stay. Just go back to reading the paper and everything will be fine.
You open the paper and try to read again, but no sooner does that happen then do you hear a voice directed at you.
“Excuse me, sir?” you hear, and you lower the paper a little bit.
Behind it stands a white unicorn with blond hair and blue eyes, wearing a nice black suit with a red band around his left foreleg. By the sound of his voice, he sounds German. Or the pony-German equivalent.
When he sees your face, his face lights up like the night sky on the fourth of July. And you are nervous.
A smile creeps his way onto his face.
“Got you.”
Now you’re scared.
“Now where is our little yellow friend?”
You can’t even make a move to respond. All of those memories of being trapped with Kiduttaa have suddenly resurfaced and you are paralyzed.
What does this guy want? What is he going to do to me?
He levitates a pamphlet out of his jacket pocket and shows you the inside.
On the left is a picture of Daring.
On the right is a picture of… you?
“That’s me…” you whisper.
“Ja. That is you.” His smile never falters.
You don’t recognize that picture of you. But you know it’s you. It looks just like you! How the hell does this guy have a picture of you?
It does not concern you that he has a picture of Daring. She is a known criminal, apparently. Shocker.
But a picture of you? And one that was not taken all that recently. At least not since you’ve been with Daring!
How the hell does he have that picture? Who is he?!
You are sweating now.
“Excuse me?” a familiar female voice asks.
The white stallion turns to see Daring. Only Daring is now wearing a white hat and shirt, like she’s part of the crew or something.
The unicorn stares for a second. Just a second.
His eyes widen in recognition of just who is standing in front of him.
No sooner does that recognition come to him than does Daring’s hoof. The yellow pegasus uppercuts the suit-wearing pony in the jaw, hard, causing him to actually lift off the ground and land flat on his back.
You instinctively move backwards on the sofa.
Daring grabs the injured unicorn, picks him up, and throws him out the open window.
Lucky for him, he lands on a pile of luggage. Lucky for you, he appears to be unconscious.
Daring exhales and pushes her mane out of her face before looking around the cabin.
Everyone is staring at her. And for good reason, too. She just threw some dude out the damn window.
“He didn’t have a ticket,” she says, pointing out the window, her voice echoing in the silent room.
Immediately, every being with a ticket on board this shit pulls it out and raises it above their head. The gesture would be comical if you weren’t terrified.
“Oh shit,” Daring breathes. “They found us. I don’t know how, but they found us.” She sits next to you on the sofa as the zeppelin finally begins to move.
“Who, Daring?” you ask. “Who found us?”
“I’m not really sure what they call themselves,” she says, scooting really close to you and putting a hoof on your thigh to calm you down. “But we call them the ‘Koirat’. And you don’t want to mess with them.”
Before you were able to question Daring further she disappeared into a back room; probably to change out of that uniform before someone who actually works here realizes what’s going on.
While she is gone, the zeppelin finally begins to take off. The giant blimp slowly ascends into the sky, all the while you’re staring down at the ground at the unicorn who was recently thrown out of the window.
Good. He still hasn’t moved.
Maybe he’s dead?
You shrug. Who cares? Better him than you, anyway.
After a few moments, the zeppelin is gliding high above the city. Looking down, you can see all the of giant buildings and little specks which you assume are various creatures going on about their day. You can see the upscale part of town, and the slums, both of which you have visited.
It’s much nicer to be as high as you are right now. It feels safe, and the view is fantastic! What a beautiful day.
If you were Daring, or a pegasus in general, you would fly all the time. Being up here, breathing in the air… it’s just nice. It’s relaxing for some reason.
Even though you are terrified of heights, it seems, you feel safe in this giant metal box. You definitely feel safer in here than you did while Daring was carrying you.
Nobody else seems to be admiring the view, though. It appears that you are the only one looking out the window.
In fact, no one is sitting anywhere near you. But that is probably due to the fact that your companion threw someone out of the open window a few minutes ago.
It’s hard for you to make friends.
The crowd on this zeppelin seems rather high-class. Every pony or zebra or whatever you see is wearing clothes, which, with the exception of Daring, seems to be a sign of class and worth.
You don’t know why Daring feels the need to wear clothes. She certainly doesn’t wear them because she is ‘classy’.
She could be wearing clothes for the same reasons you do, for all you know. It’s just weird, is all.
You really don’t know why Daring wears a shirt and a hat all the time. Not that you’re complaining! If Daring wants to wear clothes, that’s all right. If she doesn’t, that’s just fine too.
Surveying the rest of the room, you see tables and sofas filled with clothed equines politely conversing with one another, sharing bottles of white wine.
How fancy.
You don’t think you would describe yourself as ‘fancy’ or ‘classy,’ either. You don’t particularly care for any of this kind of stuff.
Sure, it’s nice to be in a first-class death machine with nice food and wine, but it makes you a little uncomfortable.
“Anything to drink, sir?” a zebra, wearing a white tuxedo asks from next to you. You didn’t even see the dude. Sneaky bastard.
“Uh…” you think for a second. “Can I get a coke?” You don’t want to drink any alcohol on this trip. As Daring claims, best to be sober.
“Of course,” the zebra nods his head and turns away, walking back to wherever the hell he came from.
Should you have gotten Daring something?
Guess not. If Daring wants something then she’ll just steal it, like she does everything else.
You chuckle to yourself. What a funny joke! Maybe you used to be a comedian.
“Your beverage, sir,” the zebra says, holding a tray with a single glass on it.
“Thank you,” you respond, surprised with how quick that was. You ordered the thing like 7 seconds ago.
You take the glass and set it on the table in front of you and you are left in peace once again.
Hopefully this trip won’t take very long. It shouldn’t.
Think about it for a sec. You already got two of the three idol things, and that took like two days to do. Now all you gotta do is land this bitch, pick up the last idol in some sketchy temple or whatever, and you can go home!
By this time in a day or two, you will be back to wherever the hell you came from.
And that is a cause for celebration!
But not quite yet. Once you get that last idol, you and Daring are gonna get hammered, then you are out of here.
Speaking of the little yellow mare, she is spotted walking through the throngs of equines and back over to you.
She looks uncomfortable.
“God damn!” Daring whispers to herself, walking back over to you. “That thing was itchy as hell! How do those ponies wear that?”
“Hey, Daring.”
“Sup.”
“You good?” you ask, taking a sip of your soda.
“Yeah.” She shakes her mane out and ruffles her wings. “Just got this itch.”
“Where?”
“Right in between my wings.” She takes a seat next to you and rubs her back against the back of the couch. “This blows.”
You notice a few ponies looking over and staring at Daring’s uncouth display. It probably is not socially acceptable to rub oneself against furniture. At least, not in public.
“Daring, Daring,” you say, putting your drink down and sitting up. “Stop. Here, just let me get it.”
“Pfft,” she spits. “Don’t need ya, Jay. I got this.” She scrunches her face up in concentration, and she now looks more ridiculous than you have ever seen her.
“Daring, just sit up.”
“Make me.”
“Stop. You’re making a scene.”
“You’re making a scene!” She proceeds to aggressively move against the back of the couch. She is doing it so hard you think she is going to permanently damage the upholstery.
And you are not going to pay for a new couch.
You grab Daring with both of your hands and pull her forcefully into your chest. She yells about how she isn’t done yet and calls you a rather inappropriate name.
You ignore her, as you have gotten used to doing, and put a hand behind her back, in between her wings, and begin scratching.
Immediately, she melts into you and releases a loud, happy sigh, drawing even more attention over to you.
You look up at all the other ponies who are already staring at you. When they see you looking right back at them, they turn and go back to whatever it is they were doing.
Dealing with Daring takes a lot of effort. She is practically a 4 year old who can kick your ass.
“A little lower?” she requests quietly, and you oblige by moving your hand further down her back.
“That good?” you ask, making sure you’re getting the right spot.
“Ohh yeah,” she coos. “You should do this for a living, dude. You’re better at this than being an adventurer.”
“Graverobber.”
You can’t see her eyes, but you know she rolled them. “Whatever. I’m not getting into that right now. Maybe later I’ll explain the difference again.”
“I’d like for you to explain the difference once.”
She shakes her head instead of verbally responding, probably too relaxed to actually want to put effort into arguing.
You gaze out the window and look at the sky around you. It’s blue, just as you thought it should be. There are a few scattered clouds, but not many. They’re pretty.
==========
At some point, without you even realizing it, Daring has lowered herself down and her head is now resting on your lap. And you are still scratching her back.
Given her gentle breathing, though, you assume that she has fallen asleep.
You straight up do not know what to do. Some other ponies are looking over at the both of you, you know it.
You stop scratching her and relax your body. Perhaps it’s best if you just let her sleep. It’s not like you’re uncomfortable or anything.
You actually enjoy this feeling.
Daring lets out a loud snore, which you know got quite a few ponies’ attention.
Fantastic.
You just decide to look out the window for a while and let Daring rest. She needs it.
==========
Daring woke up a little while ago, and to avoid any potential awkward conversation, you pretended you were asleep too. You’ve had enough with that kind of talk.
You open your eyes, pretending that you just awoke and see Daring gazing out the window, thinking.
You grab your drink and take a long sip, hoping the caffeine will get you going.
“Riddle me this, Daring,” you say, putting your drink down.
“Shoot.” She turns towards you with a little bounce and leans back against the sofa.
“All of these idols are hundreds of years old, right?”
She nods.
“If they’re that old, then how come everyone is out looking for them now? I mean, why is it that everyone unanimously chose this moment in time to find the damn things?”
“Jay,” she begins, “everypony has been looking for these things for hundreds of years, but me and you actually found one. Word got out that we found one and greedy bastards from all over the world are out to find the other ones or us. Whatever comes first.”
“How did you find the first one, Daring?” you ask. “I woke up in that forest and I saw you. How did you know where that first idol was and no one else did?”
“I…” she looks like she want to continue, but stops herself. She glances at the sofa a couple of times before continuing. “I-I don’t know? I just got lucky, I guess.”
You don’t fully buy that, but you don’t question her any further. Daring is your only friend, so if she says something, then you will believe her.
“All right,” you say. “Tell me a bit more about these competitors of yours.”
“What do you want to know?”
“Anything. You just threw some guy out of the window not too long ago. And that was some horse I haven’t even seen before, Daring. How many enemies do you have?”
She smiles. “I got more enemies than I have feathers.”
“That’s not something to brag about.”
“It is to me.”
“Of course it is. I just want to know what I should be expecting when we get off this thing in a few hours.”
She thinks for a moment. “Honestly, I don’t know. It’s best to simply expect the unexpected in this business. I could tell you that we will walk right off this thing and find the idol and go home, but that might not happen.”
“With how our luck has been going, I guarantee that won’t happen.”
She chuckles. “I know, right? But seriously, we’re gonna get off this thing and there will probably be a lot of ponies that will want to attack us.”
“Fantastic, Daring. That’s just great.”
“Well it’s not my fault, is it?”
“Of course it’s your fault. Who else could be at fault here?”
“You.”
“Me? I’m not the one who has spent my entire life pissing off the most ruthless grave robbers in the world.”
“There are so many things wrong with what you just said, I don’t even know where to begin.”
“I just want to know more about your competitors,” you say. “Who should we be worried about?”
“I’m not worried about anyone.”
“Good. Now let’s be realistic for a second. Who should we be worried about?”
“God you make me want to drink until I pass out,” she complains, sitting forward. “The biggest one we need to keep in mind is Ahuizotl.”
You nod, making a mental list of whatever names she’s going to be giving you.
“Okay?” she asks. “He is mean, greedy, but pretty stupid. He could’ve killed me years ago, but he always tries too hard. He’s got thugs and animals at his disposal, and he will probably be willing to throw everything he’s got at us.
“He never finds any of these artifacts himself. He just waits for me to get them and then tries to steal it. Too bad he sucks at that too.”
“How long have you known him?” you ask.
She smiles. “Years, man. Years. Me and him go way back.”
“Him and I,” you correct her grammar. This mare should not be a professor or a writer because she speaks like an illiterate moron.
“Why do you have to make everything about you?” she deadpans.
You shake your head and roll your eyes. “Just… who else should I know? Who was that guy you threw out of the zeppelin earlier?”
“Oh! You mean Lieutenant Douchebag?” she laughs at the name, and you assume it isn’t his real name. “I’ve known him for a long time. Years ago, he tried to hire me to find artifacts for his “master race.” Him and the rest of those psychos want everypony to be a white coated unicorn. Crazy shit, am I right?”
You guess it is. That all sounds familiar to you for some reason.
“I don’t think we have to worry about zebras where we are going. Not a lot of them there. Mostly gryphons, camels, and ponies. Camels are known for being weak a dumb. Gryphons are known for being undyingly loyal and strong, but I can’t think of a gryphon we should be worried about.”
“Do you have any friends over there?”
She laughs. “Yeah. Good one, Jay.”
It wasn’t a joke, but alright.
“There are a lot of ponies that are just like Lieutenant Douchebag where we’re heading, but they’re always in uniform and easy to spot. Just keep an eye open and you’ll be fine.”
“Doesn’t sound especially difficult.”
“That’s really all I can think of,” she yawns.
“We good?”
“Yeah, Jay,” she sighs, leaning back against the sofa and putting her hind legs on the table, “this will be the easiest part of the trip.”
And you can’t shake the feeling that she is incredibly wrong.
This plane ride is exceptionally long. How long have you been sitting on this couch? Three… four days?
Maybe years.
It is only a matter of time before this metal blimp runs out of food and the passengers are forced into cannibalism.
You and Daring are probably the strongest individuals on board this vessel; or so you like to think. So once cannibalism begins, you and Daring will be able to defend yourselves and eat the others.
Who knows how much fuel this blimp has. You don’t know what this contraption runs on. Gasoline? Magic?
For all you know, there are gryphons underneath this blimp holding it up while they fly.
Once they die, it’s all over. This whole thing is going down.
“How long have we been on this thing?!” you groan, falling back into the couch, which has gradually become very uncomfortable due to the amount of time you have spent seated on the thing.
Daring looks at you, turning away from the window. “I don’t know,” she shrugs. “Like… five… six hours?”
Impossible. You must have been stuck on this blimp for at least a few months. This ride is endless, and the only thing to do to pass the time is to argue with Daring, which becomes less and less fun the more you do it for some reason.
“Your food, sir,” the waiter says, placing a tray down in front of you. “And you, madam.” A separate tray is placed in front of your winged companion and only friend.
As it turns out, this place still does have food, and you did order. The only meat option on the menu was a chicken breast, which is what you got. Daring got a salad or some leafy dish. You don’t really care.
You snicker to yourself, lost in your thoughts. Daring curiously looks over at you, making you chuckle a bit louder.
“What?” she deadpans.
“The waiter,” you begin. “He… He called you, ‘madam.’”
For some reason that causes you to laugh even harder. Daring rolls her eyes and sips her drink.
“That’s cause I’m a lady.”
Your laughing continues and cannot be stopped. Daring doesn’t join in, but she smiles at you.
Daring continues to eat and relaxes further into the couch that the both of you have been sitting on for hours. The pegasus is lying down on her stomach with her head facing away from you.
As you finally calm down, you start thinking, as you often do.
Do you have to pay for this meal? The wait staff here has been giving you shit, but you haven’t thought about a price. Would purchasing a ticket be all-inclusive? You didn’t buy a ticket.
Not matter. Everything seems to work out somehow. You actually have a lot of luck for someone who always manages to wind up in the wrong place at the wrong time.
How much longer is this ride?
“You know…” Daring says, stretching. Her hind legs push against you a little as she does so. “I never did tell you the story of how I got my cutie mark, did I?” she questions, sliding her rump a bit closer to you, showing off the tattoo.
Naturally, you look down at her butt tattoo. You’ve seen it before, and because she enjoys showing it off, you will definitely be seeing it in the future.
The discomfort you felt at looking at the tattoo a few days ago has disappeared. Daring doesn’t seem to mind you looking, so why should you?
“What do you mean?” you ask. “Didn’t you just get it at a tattoo parlor or something?”
“Pfft! No. Not all ponies get tattoos, but most get cutie marks. Ponies get cutie marks when they discover what they’re meant to do in life.” She looks at you like what she is saying should be obvious. “Did you seriously not know that?”
“I may have, at some point.” Your memory still isn’t the best.
“I could’ve sworn I told you… No matter. Do you wanna hear the story?”
You may as well. She seems really eager to tell it, so you decide to indulge her.
“Sure, Daring,” you say. “Go right ahead.”
She gazes fondly up at the ceiling. “I was about 8 years old, which is when most foals start getting their cutie marks. I remember everything like it was yesterday…”
==========
It is very dry and humid in the deserts of southwestern Equestria.
A little yellow filly wonders why she chose to come along with so many other ponies when she could be exploring by herself. These ponies are just slowing her down!
Surely if the little filly goes off by herself she will find something cool. These stupid boy scouts don’t do anything but walk around and talk about lame badges.
Who cares! There’s so much to explore out here, she doesn’t even know where to begin.
“You look excited,” a slightly older blue unicorn says to the red eyed pegasus.
“Sure I am,” Daring responds. “Who wouldn’t be? I mean, just look at all the places to explore!”
Daring gestures around with her tiny legs at all the caverns that surround the scout troop.
“Uh…” the unicorn begins. “We can’t go exploring, Daring. We gotta stick with the group. If we don’t, we might get lost or get in trouble, and I can’t get in trouble if I want to get all my badges.”
“Geez, Lucas, you’re the biggest dork I’ve ever met. And I’ve met hundreds of dorks from here to Fillydelphia.”
“Hey!”
“Where is the excitement? I thought you colt-scouts went out and actually did stuff.”
“We do stuff.”
“Lame stuff. I’m talking about exploring and adventure! Going where nopony has been in centuries! Risking life and limb for fame and glory!”
“Sounds dangerous.”
“Only to dorks and pansies.”
“I am neither.”
“You are both.”
The red-eyed filly, fed up with walking, decides to jump onto her companion’s back. She lays down in a huff and allows all four of her legs to dangle over his sides.
“This is sooo boring!” Daring groans.
Lucas rolls his eyes. “Relax, Daring. We’re almost there.”
“Almost where?!”
“I don’t know.”
“For the love of…” Daring jumps off Lucas’ back and starts looking around again. She suppresses the strong urge to run off by herself and into one of the caves.
Daring hears something.
What was that noise? It sounded like voices to her, but it couldn’t have been from anypony in the scout troop. It sounded more distant than that…
She turns her attention towards one of the caves and stares intently at it, concentrating.
There’s definitely somepony over there.
“Come on, Pipsqueak,” Lucas calls, having walked a good distance ahead of the filly.
“Don’t call me ‘Pipsqueek,’ asshole!” the filly shouts, scowling and running to catch up.
“Hey! You can’t say, ‘asshole!’ You’re just a filly!”
“And you’re an asshole! Asshole!”
“Oh yeah? Who let you come along with his colt-scout troop? Was it me?” He pretends to think as Daring scowls up at him. “Oh yeah! It was me.”
Daring somehow manages to control her short temper and not say what she really wants to.
“Thank… you…” she manages through gritted teeth, and the older stallion smiles at the great victory that is making Daring apologize.
“You’re too cute,” Lucas says, ruffling up the pegasus’ mane.
Daring pushes away and styles her mane back into its usual form.
“You should watch your language more. You shouldn’t swear, like ever. You’re only six.”
“I’m eight and a half!”
Lucas shrugs.
The two continue the walk with the rest of the scout troop. Daring glances back occasionally to that cave where she heard the voices.
After only a minute or two, they all finally stop.
“Alright, lads!” scout leader Spielberg yells. “Let’s take a break. No one wander off!”
“Let’s go check out that cave!” Daring whispers excitedly to her older companion, despite what the scout leader has literally just announced.
Lucas rolls his eyes. “Did you not hear Mr. Spielberg? He just said we can’t wander off.”
“We can do whatever we want. It’s a free country. Besides, he’s not my scout leader.”
“No, but he is the adult, and he knows best.”
“Adults are stupid.”
“You’re stupid.”
“You’re boring!” The little yellow filly turns in a huff and begins walking towards the cave.
“What are you doing?” Lucas asks, a little panicked, trotting to catch up with the little pegasus.
“What do you mean, ‘What are you doing?’ I just told you! I’m exploring that cave!” Daring tries to propel herself forward at a faster rate by flapping her undersized wings, but she is unable to get herself off the ground.
“You can’t go by yourself!”
“Then come with me!”
Before Lucas can respond, the little filly has already bolted in the direction of the cave. Seeing no other options, Lucas follows. He checks over his shoulder to make sure they sneak away unnoticed by the rest of the troop.
Daring runs into the cave and immediately hears some group of ponies talking. She can’t make out any words yet, but she knows they’re in here somewhere.
There is only one path in this cave. Thankfully, she hears voices coming from there, so she begins walking.
She proceeds quietly in order to sneak up on whoever is in there.
“Wait!” Lucas says, finally catching up.
“Shh! Not so loud,” she whispers. Without saying anything else, the filly begins to move forward along her path with Lucas hesitantly following.
After a few short moments, Daring and Lucas come up to a ledge that looks over the bottom part of the cave. In the bottom part, Daring counts four ponies.
Three of them are digging. Two are wearing pith helmets and another is wearing a baseball cap.
There is a fourth guy in a leather jacket and fedora who is not digging, but casually observing what is happening.
“Who are they?” Lucas asks.
“Shh! How am I supposed to know?” Daring moves as close as she can to the ledge to hear what they are saying.
“Keep digging, boys!” the one in the fedora, who is not digging, instructs. Daring assumes this one is their leader, as he is not doing any physical work and is wearing a jacket. Why would somepony where a jacket out here? It’s 90 degrees out here.
But Daring must admit she really likes that jacket. She wants it.
But even better than the jacket, she wants what they just dug up.
One of the diggers grabs something out of a hole and excitedly rushes it over to the jacket-wearing pony. The other two are quick to follow, looking equally as excited. Their leader takes the object and begins to closely observe it.
“What is it, boss?!” one of the diggers asks excitedly. “What is it?!”
“It’s gold, ain’t it?” another digger asks.
“Is it worth a lot?” the third one cuts in. “Are we rich?!”
“Shut up, morons,” the fedora-wearing stallion breathes, observing the artifact. He turns it over and over again slowly, looking at closely as he possibly can at the thing.
“Keep digging,” he instructs, still looking at the golden star-like object.
The other three stallions quickly grab up their gear and get back to digging in the same spot where they found the star, hoping to find something else. They push each other around a bit, trying to get the best potential spot to actually dig something up.
“It’s real,” the fedora says to himself, placing the golden star on the ground.
“What is it, boss?” one of the workers asks, having stopped digging for a moment.
“The star of Jehovah!” the leader says, glancing behind him at the object on the ground. “And yes, it is worth a pretty penny.”
Daring’s eyes go wide and her mouth forms into an “o” as she gazes at the object, which must be worth a fortune. From what the filly can see, the object they possess is a star of David made of gold.
She wants it.
“But how are the four of us going to split a penny?” the digger asks.
“It’s an expression, you dolt. Now keep digging!” The leader walks up closer to the diggers to instruct them.
Daring sees the star laying on the ground, and she sees the diggers, facing the exact opposite direction.
They look pretty busy. Nopony seems to be paying much attention to the priceless artifact.
So why not just take it?
Daring begins to move forward.
“What are you doing?” her companion asks.
“Lower me down!” Daring whispers excitedly, her eyes moving rapidly between the gold star and Lucas.
“What?” Lucas asks, disbelievingly. “No way! Have you seen those guys? If they see us here, they’ll kill us.”
“Don’t be such a baby.” Daring turns around, looking over the edge of her position. “Just like, use your unicorn magic and float me down a little.”
“Why don’t you just fly? Oh wait...”
“Why don’t I just kick your teeth in?”
“Daring! I’m not going to help you- ah!” Lucas exclaims, backing up a little bit.
The filly looks down and sees a snake, slithering towards Lucas. She rolls her eyes before picking it up between her hooves and tossing it away.
“I’m getting out of here. And you should too!”
In just a few seconds, Lucas scurries out of the cave.
“Fine then,” Daring breathes. “I don’t need your help anyway. I can do this myself.”
Daring knows better than anypony else that she cannot fly, but she needs to get down to ground level in order to get the star.
The wall is a little rocky, so she gives that shot.
Daring slowly climbs down the wall so that she is on the same level as these “archaeologists,” or whatever they are supposed to be. Her small hooves are great for gripping the tiny indents in the cave wall, allowing her to safely move down.
Her hoof slips off one of the rocks and her undersized wings flare out to either side of her, but she manages to hold on. She freezes on the wall for a second, making sure the diggers didn’t hear her.
They are all too preoccupied with searching for more treasures to hear anything. After the excitement they felt after the first artifact they dug up, there is no way they are paying attention to anything other than finding more gold.
The filly’s hooves touch the cold stone of the cavern floor. Her red eyes do not move away from the diggers once as her heart continues to beat faster and faster.
‘Is this stealing?’ she asks herself.
‘Hell yeah it’s stealing! But who cares about stealing from thieves?’
With her conscience at ease, she slowly makes her way to the object that was left all by itself.
Her eyes still on the diggers, she slowly moves backwards until she feels something strange touch her hind hoof.
Looking back, she is met with the beautiful sight of gold.
Her red eyes get bigger as this is the first time she has seen real gold. It’s so shiny and pretty…
And now it’s hers.
She picks the object up in her teeth, but it is heavy and it almost falls to the ground. She’s not sure how she is supposed to carry it.
She could keep it in her mouth, but it’s heavy. She might be able to put her head through the middle and carry it like a necklace, but what if she can’t get her head back out? Decisions, decisions…
Well, before she worries about carrying it long distances, she needs to sneak it out of here. It was relatively easy to climb down here, but how is she going to get back up?
“Hey!” one of the diggers yells, causing Daring to freeze. She looks over only to see all four diggers looking right at her.
“What do you think you’re doing?!”
The filly stares at them in shock for a moment before deciding to take her leave. She slips the star over her head and around her neck and charges at the cave wall. Her short legs run up the wall before gravity begins to set in. Before she starts falling, Daring flaps her undersized wings faster than a hummingbird, desperately trying to reach the ledge.
Surprisingly, Daring finds herself not falling back to the floor. She keeps flapping her wings as her legs climb up the wall.
She feels a hoof on her hind leg, but she kicks it away.
And she actually manages to reach and climb up to the ledge.
“How the hell did I do that?” she asks herself in amazement, taking a moment to catch her breath.
“Get back here!” a voice booms from deeper in the cavern. One can only assume that the diggers are giving chase, which forces Daring to run out of the cave as fast as her hooves can carry her.
After sprinting out of the corridor and back outside, she immediately starts looking for the scout troop she came here with.
Only to find a sea of rocks, sand, dirt… and no ponies.
Where is everypony? Where did they go? This is where they’re supposed to be!
Shit!
“Lucas, you bastard!” she yells, her voice echoing off the rocks that are all around her.
Hearing the hoofsteps of multiple ponies who are probably upset about their stolen treasure, Daring realizes she has two options. She can either run or hide.
Running does not seem to be an option, as she is already exhausted from carrying the heavy gold weight around. It was difficult enough getting out of that cave, but civilization is two or three miles from here, and Daring doubts she will be able to make it that far without getting caught by her pursuers.
It’s too hot to run anyway. Daring soon finds herself regretting that she ventured to southwest Equestria by herself. It’s too hot for anypony to comfortably live down here. Surely there are treasures in areas of the country with more moderate temperatures.
Seeing that running is not an option, she chooses to hide. All she needs to do is find a nice hiding spot.
She spots a collection of rocks that she believes will make an adequate hiding place and sprints in that direction. She just has to get there before she is spotted.
“How am I supposed to carry this thing?!” Daring shouts to herself, fumbling with the strange star-shaped object. Not only is the object shaped in a peculiar way, but it is quite heavy.
She would simply fly away with it, but she’s not the best flier. The pegasus filly doesn’t know how she was able to levitate earlier.
Truth be told, Daring is terrified of heights, so flying isn’t an option anyway, despite the semi-operational wings on her sides.
The bottom part of the star around her neck hits the ground as the filly is running, causing Daring to flip over and fall into a collection of rocks.
Where a tremendous amount of spiders happen to be living.
The filly shoots straight up into the air, screaming.
“Get ‘em off! Get ‘em off!”
No longer paying attention to where she is going, she runs around and swats at herself, trying to remove the disgusting creatures from her. Daring flings the golden star from around her neck and starts rolling around the ground.
She finally gets all the spiders off her as she lays on the sand on her back, staring up at the sky, completely out of breath.
The she feels a pressure on her tail.
Daring looks down and sees the leather jacket pony and his companions all standing around Daring.
And they have the gold.
The fedora-wearing stallion smiles down at the defeated filly. Of course, because Daring is Daring, she will never admit defeat, even to a much older, more experienced, and stronger stallion.
Daring tries to pounce at the stallion, but he moves and Daring falls on her face.
“That was close call,” the group leader announces, and his companions chuckle.
The filly looks up at the stallion, not bothering to get up. She’s exhausted.
“You’re quite the adventurous little one, aren’t you?” the fedora-wearing stallion asks. Daring’s only response is to look menacingly in his direction, eliciting a chuckle from the professional adventurer. "And very sneaky."
The fedora-wearing adventurer removes the pith helmet from one of his companions and places it atop of Daring’s head.
The helmet is much too large for the young filly, as it covers her entire head and weighs her down.
Daring pushes the helmet off of herself with her forelegs defiantly before glaring up at the stallion who has taken her treasure.
“You’ll have to grow into it.”
Daring’s only response is her best one: not saying anything and glaring daggers.
“What’s your name, little filly?”
As one should expect, Daring says nothing.
The stallion laughs. “You’ll make a great adventurer one day, kid.” He turns to the rest of his group. “Let’s get back to work. And we’ll have to keep a better eye on what we find.” He smiles and winks at Daring, who still looks pissed.
The rest of the group turns and moves back to the cave. The stallion turns to Daring one last time.
“Oh, and uh…” the stallion smiles sweetly down at the little filly, still pissed off and lying on the ground. “Congratulations.”
'Congratulations? On what?! What a toolbag!'
They all leave, and Daring is alone.
“What a douche,” Daring says, rising and dusting herself off. “Congratulations? What a cocky son of a-”
As Daring is patting herself, she notices something on her flank.
Her cutie mark.
“Holy shit.”
==========
Daring smiles at you, looking proud of her story and waiting for you to praise it.
“Are you really that afraid of spiders?” you ask, trying not to laugh.
She scowls at you, her red eyes searing into your soul. “That was what you got out of that story?”
“I thought it was cute.”
“It’s not cute! How does none of that impress you?” she asks disbelievingly.
“What?” you ask. “I’m impressed! It’s cool that you started your career in thievery at age eight.”
“Sarcasm is like a second language to me. I have, like the best cutie mark story ever!”
“Sure.”
She scoffs before pointing a hoof at you. “You’re just jealous ‘cause I have a cutie mark and you don’t.”
“How do you know I don’t have one?” you ask with a smile before leaning in slightly. “Have you been looking?”
Her face turns red in an instant and she moves away from you before looking down at the ground. “N-No! You-... You’re so... Bah! Forget it.”
Daring is so cute when she’s embarrassed.
“I guess that also explains why you wear that stupid hat,” you say.
“Hey!”
“But why do you wear that shirt all the time?”
“Because I do whatever I want.”
You suppose she does.
“Ladies and gentlecolts!” a well-dressed pony announces, getting everyone’s attention. “We will be landing in about one hour.”
Praise Jesus.
“Cool,” Daring sighs, lying down on the couch and putting her head on your lap. You look down at her curiously, but her eyes are closed and she has a small smile on her face. “Got time for a little nap.”
There’s no reason she can’t lay in the opposite direction, but you don’t say anything.
“I liked your story, Daring,” you say, and she opens her eyes to look at you. “It was cool.”
The giant blimp touches down after what feels like a solid week of air travel. Luckily, the blimp did not catch fire at any point on the journey, making it somewhat relaxing.
As fun as it was, it’s great to finally get off the thing and get to walk around. Confined spaces aren’t always the best. Especially not with someone your size in a world full of miniature animals.
Not that you have actually gotten off the giant blimp / fire hazard / potential deathtrap. All these other ponies seem to have brought a lot of luggage with them, so moving it all out is holding you up.
After finding a brief opening in the long line of ponies and zeppelin workers who are carrying off their luggage, you and Daring manage to slip through real quick and get to the ground once again.
“It’s great to be on the Earth again,” you say, having had enough with zeppelin rides after the one trip. “I’m almost surprised the thing didn’t blow up, considering my luck.”
“With your luck,” Daring adds, “the zeppelin would’ve gotten lost, forgotten where it was, met up with an awesome, beautiful adventurer blimp who would’ve had to slowly guide it to where it’s supposed to go.”
“That’s funny, Daring, congratulations, I see what you did.”
“I’m the funniest and most creative pony you’ll ever meet, so enjoy my company while we’re both still around.”
“Oh I’m enjoying every second of it, believe me.”
You have landed at an airport, as one may expect, which seems to be just on the outskirts of a sizeable city. What the city is called you do not know and could not care any less. The only thing that matters is where that last artifact is.
The second you get it, you’re gone. So hopefully you can get this one a bit easier than you got the other two.
The first artifact was hidden in an ancient temple that was covered with traps. If you didn’t have to go back in a place like that ever again, you’d be pretty happy.
The second artifact was already possessed by some crazy tribal zebras who really did not like you. You have the scars to prove it. If you never had to go through that sort of experience again, you’d be pretty happy.
But, of course, with the way things have been going for you, you’ll probably have to go into an ancient trap-infested temple filled with zebras who want to torture you.
Something like that will probably happen. And you will not be happy.
But with Daring’s luck, you’ll end up getting hurt, but you’ll both get out alive in the end with the artifacts. If you had to guess what would happen, that’d be it.
As long as Daring’s around.
“So where we off to now?” you ask, the both of you having exited the airport and entered the streets of the unknown city.
“To the nicer part of town right now,” Daring says. “Once we get there, we will find a place to spend the night and map out our plan for tomorrow.”
“How do we know when we get to the good part of this city?”
“Are you serious? Look around, Jay.” She looks at you as though you’re mentally disabled, and it is a look you have received hundreds of times in the past few days. “See these zebras and camels walking around?”
You nod.
“Do they look friendly? Or clean?”
“No, but neither do we.”
“True, but the difference between us and them are that we have a shit ton of cash money.”
“Well don’t just announce that to everyone!” you whisper, getting her to shutup.
“Relax, Jay. You’re always so worried. Does it look like any being here speaks Equestrian?”
“How the hell should I know? I don’t even know where we are.”
“Then leave the worrying to me.”
“But you’re never worried about anything.”
“Exactly. Now neither of us have to worry. Just calm down, dude, when have I ever let you down?”
“I’m sure there have been times.”
“No there haven’t. I’m the perfect companion. But seriously, stop worrying, it’s bumming me out.”
“So we’re going further into the city?” you ask.
“Yep! For now anyways. But let’s just take one step at a time here. We get to the hotel, plan for tomorrow, and that’s all we should be concentrated on right now.”
Seems like a simple enough task.
The streets are not very crowded, which is wonderful, and you continue walking through the bad neighborhoods of wherever you are.
==========
It’s still just as hot here as it was 12 hours ago when you were in your previous desert hell hole. Surprisingly enough, wherever you are right now looks exactly the same as where you were this morning.
For all you know, the zeppelin could have flown over the ocean for eight hours, turned around, and landed back exactly where you started. You could still be in the same city.
“We’re not,” Daring says.
“Are you sure?” you ask, looking around. The architecture and ponies and weather are exactly the same as they all have been for the past few days. And there still isn’t any wind. You would kill for a cool breeze. “Everything looks the same to me.”
“Well, you’ve probably never been here before.”
“Probably.”
“So this part of the world will look a little strange.”
“Every part of this world looks more than a little strange.”
You don’t look like any being you have seen recently. As far as you know, the only human walking around the surface of this world is you.
Surely you were the offspring of beings that looked somewhat like you. That shouldn’t be an especially unreasonable thought.
But there are no beings that even remotely resemble you. Everything that talks is a tiny horse or zebra or whatever. You are in the land of the magical talking midget animals.
“Damn it’s so hot here,” you observe, pulling at the collar of your shirt, which is a little damp from sweating all day.
“You keep saying that as though I don’t know,” Daring responds, equally as tired and sweaty.
“Sorry. It’s the only thing I can think about right now. There’s no escaping it. And I’m tired.”
“Well despite all that, and your constant complaining, you’re moving around really well.”
“Uh, yeah. Why wouldn’t I be?”
“... Are you stupid?” she asks, looking at you like you are. “Seriously, do you just say things to mess with me?”
“Not all the time.”
“You had a knife in your back like 3 days ago! What the hell do you mean, ‘why wouldn’t I be?’ You wouldn’t be because you got cut the fuck up!”
“Oh yeah,” you say, having forgotten the terrible ordeal in the heat of the desert.
“Oh yeah!” Daring imitates you.
“It was actually a hook, not a knife.”
“You’re fucking retarded, Jay, like seriously.”
“How? I can’t even feel my wounds anymore. Whatever you rubbed on my back the other day must’ve really worked.”
“That stuff wouldn’t just make your wounds suddenly feel like nothing, though. It was just to disinfect it and help the pain go away long enough for you to fall asleep. And I gave you that a while ago. It should’ve worn off by now.”
“Well, maybe you got the super strength bottle at the pharmacy.”
“I didn’t. You should be in an incredible amount of pain.”
“Do you want me to be?”
“Of course not! But you should be!”
In a flash, Daring rushes behind you and lifts up your shirt, right in the middle of the street.
“What are you doing?!” you exclaim, trying to put your shirt back down. Other ponies on the road look at the both of you like ‘what?’
“I want to see your back! It’ll take like 2 seconds.”
“Look at it later! Wait til we get somewhere maybe just a little more private.” You push her off you and adjust your shirt and she walks in front of you. “If you really want to undress me, then wait until we get to the hotel.”
Her face, as you expected, turns red. You can’t tell if it’s out of anger, frustration, tiredness, the heat, or embarrassment, but you like to think it’s embarrassment.
“That’s not even close to what I was trying to do!” she growls. “I just wanted to see your back.”
“I’m sure you did.”
She grinds her teeth before turning away. “I really do hate you sometimes, you know.”
“I know.”
==========
You can feel Daring looking at you. You’ve been feeling it for like 30 seconds now, which, if you count to 30, is an incredibly long period of time to be looking at someone and not say anything.
You glance over at her, expecting her to look away, but she doesn’t. She’s still just looking at you. No expression can be read on her face.
“What?” you ask.
“How are you even walking right now?”
“We’ll find out soon enough.”
==========
The lobby for this hotel is allright, but not nearly as nice as the one you stayed in a couple nights ago.
But this one is even more expensive somehow.
The hotel is pretty nice, but it ought to be considering the price of a room for one night. Yeah, you have a lot of money, but not for long if this is how much a hotel room costs.
Actually seeing the room will have to wait, as Daring and you have decided to get a drink or two from the bar.
Of course, alcohol isn’t the best thing to have in your exact situation, but Daring says it’s okay. As long as you don’t get incredibly intoxicated, everything is fine, which is good, cause you just want a few enough to unwind a bit.
Daring says nopony will know exactly where the both of you are for another couple days at least. That one unicorn guy Daring threw off the zeppelin will probably tell his buddies where you two were heading, but actually finding your location within this city will take some time.
And she doubts the first place they will look is a luxurious hotel.
It’s almost relaxing; to think that nopony knows exactly where you are. However, you have come to expect almost anything, so there probably is some bad pony out there who does know where you are.
They could even be sitting in the bar for all you know, but that’s probably just your pessimism and paranoia combining.
This hotel does look pretty fancy, and so does the bar, which is pretty crowded. Every pony in the bar looks very clean and they are all wearing clothes. Nice clothes, at that.
You and Daring are both wearing clothes too, but they’re not fancy and you’re not clean. So you stand out a bit, but what else is new.
But that’s partially due to the fact that Daring insists on wearing that hat.
“It’s a pith helmet.”
Most tables are full but the bar itself seems relatively empty so you both head on over there.
You take a seat on one of the barstools.
“I need to use the fillies room,” Daring says, starting to walk away. “Order me something.”
“What do you want?”
“Whiskey.”
Naturally. You decide to get the same.
“Two whiskeys,” you request, turning forward and gazing at the large collection of alcohol on the shelves behind the bar.
The bartender probably doesn’t understand english, but he seems to know what you meant by whiskey and pours it out.
He passes them to you and you take a small sip, breathing in the burning sensation that comes with stronger alcohol.
It’s good.
There is a bit of smoke in the air; not not because there is a fire, but because this seems to be a smoke friendly area. Not that you care. It’s a bar.
You take a deep breath, thinking about how there is only one artifact left. Then all this shit can be over. It’s a nice thought.
But not especially realistic.
There is apparently an entire race of ponies who plan on using these artifacts to conquer everypony else. If they really set their mind to it, they could find the artifacts.
Or you. Or both.
Whatever. That’s not something to worry about at this exact moment. You should just try to relax for the rest of the day. Being constantly worried is going to give you a heart attack.
Everybody goes, but it’d be great if you stuck around for a while longer.
A heart attack sounds painful, too.
As you take another sip of the whiskey, you happen to glance to your right, where you see Daring, who is not in the bathroom.
She is at the far end of the bar, talking to some stallion that you don’t know. You didn’t think she had any friends in this city.
Actually, she doesn’t have any friends anywhere. Except you, sorta, but some might debate that.
Marley, the senile camel, could probably be counted as a friend too. What a group you three are. The cocky graverobber, the lost amnesiatic human, and the senile camel, hunting for ancient buried treasure.
Sounds like a bad movie.
The stallion she is talking to seems to a brown earth pony. Nothing special. He has his back to you, so Daring is facing towards you, but focused on that random stallion.
What really surprises you though, is that Daring seems to be really enjoying herself. She’s giggling and smiling.
In the middle of the stallion talking, Daring smiles and flips her mane out of her eyes. She’s acting all… flirty.
You feel angry for some reason. Jealous, even. Who the fuck is she talking to?
Daring glances at you for a second but then focuses again back on the stallion. Whatever.
You turn to face the bar again and sip your drink.
It doesn’t matter who she talks to. You don’t care. She’s having a good time, and you are happy for her.
“Fuck it,” you say, downing the rest of the whiskey and promptly ordering a second. Meanwhile, Daring’s drink is still sitting right next to you, but you figure she will get it at some point.
You look to the other end of the bar, just to take in the sights.
Where you spot a white mare wearing a red dress sitting all by herself.
And she appears to be looking at you.
You quickly look around you in all directions to make sure it is actually you that she is looking at. After a quick check, and realizing there is nopony in the immediate area she could be looking at, you turn back to her again.
She hops off of her seat and begins slowly walking towards you, her eyes never leaving yours. They’re blue.
You don’t know what to do, so just sitting where you are seems to be the best option. She’s either interested in you or an assassin. With your luck, it’s probably the latter, but you’re hopeful.
Whiskey makes you hopeful.
The approaching white mare has a black, curly mane and a very short red dress on, leaving her back half almost entirely exposed, but manages to cover what ought to be covered.
She sits on the stool next to yours and smiles at you.
Then she says something.
Unfortunately, as far as you know, you speak one language, and that language isn’t whatever this mare is speaking.
You must admit, she is a very attractive pony, and her voice is soft and sweet. She’s been smiling lightly at you for a while, and you can’t help but return it.
But there still isn’t any way for you to know what she is saying.
“Can I get you a drink?” you ask.
She tilts her head a bit to the side, inquisitively. She doesn’t know what you’re saying either. It might be a long night.
“Drink?” you ask again, making the motion of someone drinking.
She says something and nods, prompting you to get another drink.
Daring hasn’t come back for her drink yet, so she probably won’t miss it. She seems busy anyway.
You slide the white mare Daring’s drink, and happen to peak over at your adventurous companion.
She’s still at the opposite end of the bar, but now she is looking right at you. The stallion she is with is still talking to her, but she doesn’t seem to be paying attention as she looks in your direction.
And she looks pissed. It looked like she was having fun talking to that guy earlier.
Oh well. Not your problem right now.
You turn back to your new foreign friend who takes a sip of Daring’s drink. After just a small sip, she coughs a couple times, the drink being too strong for her.
She laughs and says something, but you will never know what it is. You have no idea what’s going on anymore. Life gets a little more confusing every second.
Who is this even?
Somepony grabs your arm and squeezes it tightly. After a glance, you see that Daring is back and has wrapped her forelegs entirely around your arm.
And she’s glaring at the mare in the red dress.
Daring says something in a foreign language, and the mare in the red dress immediately starts to look offended.
Daring says something else, smiling this time, causing the white mare to turn with a huff and leave. She turns once to give Daring the evil eye, but then she exits the bar.
“What the hell was that?” you ask Daring, looking rather pleased.
“What?”
“What’d you say to her?”
“Nothing! Jeez, relax, Jay.” She yawns overdramatically. “Let’s go upstairs now.” She tugs at your arm that she is still wrapped around.
“No, hold on, I want to know what just happened.”
She sighs, tugging even more so on your arm. “I’ll explain later, just c’mon, I’m so tired!”
“Who was that?”
“Nopony.”
“What’d you say?”
“Nothing!”
“Daring I am four and a half seconds away from freaking the fuck out, just tell me what just happened! And who were you even talking to back there?”
“No… pony… And if you ask me again I’m going to headbutt you right in the face.” She moves her face a little closer to yours.
“Domestic violence isn’t a joke, Daring.”
“I didn’t say it was a joke- And it wouldn’t count as domestic violence anyway! What are you trying to say?!”
Seeing as she is making a scene, and drawing a lot of unwanted attention, you decide to appease her. “Nothing, let’s just get out of here.” You glance around at all the other ponies who are looking at you, and think it’s best to just go.
She smiles up at you before letting go of your arm. The stallion that Daring was talking to just a minute ago trots over to the both of you.
“Beat it, Pablo,” Daring says, nudging by him and you both leave.
“Who was that?” you ask, having left the bar.
She shrugs. “Some guy who was hitting on me.”
You’re so confused right now. “At least you didn’t kick him in the nuts.”
“Ha!” she yells the world before chuckling a bit. “Yeah. He has no idea how lucky he and his balls really are. Not like I would’ve done anything with him, anyways. He smelled funny.”
“So do you.”
“Yeah, but it’s not by choice. In just a few minutes I’ll take a shower and smell beautiful. One of us ought to.”
“I only smell a bit. I’ll take a shower too.”
“Not before I get to look at your back.”
“Sure. Why are we heading up so early?” you ask, calling the elevator. “I thought you wanted to drink.”
“Eh, we can drink in the room.”
True, but you also could’ve done that in the first place.
Whatever. You’re just along for the ride.
“You don’t want to sit at the bar?”
She shakes her head, getting into the elevator. “Nah, I guess not. I’d rather just hang out with you than be around a bunch of other ponies.”
That’s one of the nicest things she’s ever said to you, and you make a mental note of it.
==========
The room itself is very nice, but not especially different from the hotel you stayed in a couple nights ago.
The view is also pretty good, but you are on the 12th floor, so it ought it be.
Why are all these hotels so tall?
The room has a small kitchen, a bathroom, a balcony, and the main area with the bed and a desk.
That’s right: one bed again.
“How?” you ask, very quietly and only to yourself. This is like the third place you’ve voluntarily stayed in with one bed. Does every room only have one bed?
“Hey, Daring,” you say, getting her attention and she rummages around the kitchen. “Y’know, we have plenty of money. We could get separate rooms if you want, so we’re not sharing a bed all the time.”
You’re not sure if Daring wants some privacy. She seems like she does, but she’s weird, so you can’t read her all too well.
“Oh, yeah…” she looks down, as though she dropped something and is searching for it. “Um… Well, we shouldn’t do that. We should stay in the same room.”
“Why is that?”
“Heh, uh… Well, we should stay in the same room for security! Yeah. You never know who’s looking for ya, Jay. We’ve stuck together this far and everything’s been semi-successful, so we should just keep doing that.”
Makes sense to you. “Good point.”
“Yeah it is! Always gotta be thinking, Jay. So!” She jumps over the counter and walks towards the bed with a knife in her hoof. “Let’s get a look at your back.”
“What’s the knife for?”
“To cut the bandages. If I was gonna stab you to death, Jay, it would’ve been exactly 3 seconds after we first met in the jungle.”
“I know you’re not gonna stab me, I was just asking.” You remove your shirt and walk over to the bed where Daring is waiting, tugging at the bandages.
“No! Don’t touch ‘em,” Daring says. “I’ll cut them off. Just lie down before you hurt yourself.”
You lie down on your stomach, just as you did a couple days before, and wait for Daring.
You don’t have to wait for long, as in just a second, you feel the presence of your only companion on your rump.
“Comfy?” you ask, your cheeks flushing. She seriously has no concept of personal space.
“Yeah, actually,” she giggles, bouncing up and down a couple times. “Ahem. But seriously, let’s get these off.”
You take a quick glance back at the pegasus to notice she is no longer wearing her shirt or helmet. She is as naked as everypony else, and once again, you are just too baffled to ask her anything.
You saw her bathing a few days ago and she yelled at you! Now she is sitting on you wearing nothing and pretending it’s no big deal. Honestly she has to have a mental problem.
Mares are confusing creatures.
Suddenly, something sharped is pressed against your back. You jolt as though you were struck by lightning you flip over onto your back, not even close to forgetting what happened to you earlier this week.
Daring hops off you for just long enough to land again on your groin with her wings flared out.
“Shh, shh, it’s okay,” she says, placing a gentle hoof on your chest. “Just relax. Breathe.”
She places her other hoof on your chest to balance herself.
“That was my fault,” she admits. “Should’ve said I was starting.”
“I didn’t mean to flip over like that.”
“I know you didn’t, it’s okay. Now I’m gonna cut the bandages, Jay, alright?”
You nod, looking down at her as she takes the knife in her mouth.
“I’ll go slowly.”
As she said, she slowly slides the knife between your stomach and the bandage itself, cutting it as she moves along. She slowly moves the knife, and her head, up your chest towards where the bandages end.
You can feel the knife move along your skin, but you manage to keep yourself calm.
“There,” she announces, having finished. She picks up her head, which is now only a few inches away from yours, and stops for a moment, just looking at your face.
Her eyes are really big, and they’ve always been the one part of Daring that you’ve never had a problem with. Her hooves scare you because she kicks ponies in the privates, her wings scare you because she sucks at flying and dropped you at the airport…
But her eyes have always been something that calm you down. They’re so red! Who else has red eyes?
“Everything okay?” you ask.
Daring shakes her head out and moves back to re-situate herself on your groin before literally throwing the knife back into the kitchen.
“That’s not safe,” you say.
“And safety is my number one concern. You good?”
“I don’t know I haven’t seen what my back looks like yet.”
“Sit up.” Daring wraps her forelegs under your armpits and physically pulls you into a sitting position on the mattress before she moves behind you.
In the meantime, you stare outside, watching the setting sun and the one cloud that is in the sky lazily float by.
It’s been a pretty relaxing day, if you look at everything relatively. You haven’t been attacked, or have been under the threat of being attacked, in several hours now. It’s been nice while it has lasted.
“Wow,” Daring says from behind you.
“Wow? Why wow?”
You feel her touch your back with her hoof, causing you to jolt again…
But it didn’t hurt. Not even a little bit.
You look over your shoulder and back at Daring who is still just looking at your back. She reaches her hoof towards you again, and you try to relax as she places it softly against your injured back.
And you feel her hoof. No pain accompanies it, it’s just her hoof.
But you should feel pain. You should be in an incredible amount of pain, like Daring said earlier.
She runs her furry hoof down your back slowly. It tickles a bit, but it’s not painful in any way.
“Wow,” Daring says again. As she gazes at your back, and you continue to look at her, her mouth hangs open and her big red eyes shrink to the size of a grain of rice.
“How do you do that with your eyes?” you ask.
“That’s not possible,” she whispers in disbelief, still looking at your back.
“I know it’s not. Your eyes are unnaturally small right now.”
“I was right,” she continues to whisper, seemingly to herself.
“Right about what?”
Daring shakes her head, as though physically throwing something from her mind. Her eyes return to the normal sized red orbs you are accustomed to seeing before she looks up at you.
“What?” she asks.
“What were you right about?”
“Uh…” she continues to stare at you as she things. “Nothing?”
“What did you say?”
“Just.... nothing?”
You get up off the bed and quickly walk towards the bathroom, wanting to get a look at your back for yourself. Daring follows quickly behind, never taking her eyes off you for a second.
You go into the bathroom, turn on the light, turn around in the mirror and see your back.
It’s the exact way it’s always been for your entire life. There isn’t anything there but skin.
All of your skin. No scars, no blood, no pain, nothing.
Everything is back to the way it was before you ever saw a talking zebra.
“How in the hell?” you ask, running your own hands over your back, just to make sure the mirror is telling the truth. “How is this possible?”
You look down at your only friend, who is now standing in the bathroom with you. Her eyes have returned to normal size now.
“Daring, how is this possible?”
She looks you in the eyes for the first time in several minutes and offers a simple shrug.
Great, of course she doesn’t know. The pony who has the answers for everything doesn’t know this.
But who would? This isn’t natural.
You are in a strange world. Once you think you got something figured out, this weird shit happens.
“So it is true,” you barely hear Daring whisper to herself, as her gaze returns to your backside.
“What was that?” you ask, turning to the mare.
“What?” She looks up at your face again.
“What’d you say?”
“I didn’t say anything, Jay.”
“No, I just heard you say ‘So it is true.’ What’s true? Don’t lie to me, Daring, this week has been awful and weird for me and I’m about ready to explode.”
“Jay, seriously, I said nothing, you’re hearing shit.” She turns and begins to walk out of the bathroom.
And as she exits the bathroom, you can’t help but look at her lower half. You’ve never really noticed the casual way her hips seem to swing back and forth.
Her butt is a bit bigger than you thought, now that you’re looking at it.
Stop looking at it.
Snapping yourself at of your stupor, you follow her out into the bedroom, calming yourself down. It’s only a matter of time before you explode in anger or frustration with this mare, but let’s not have it be right now. Not when you’re so close to achieving your final goal.
You take a few deep breaths. “You want to go out and eat or get room service again?” you ask, picking up the knife off the ground that Daring threw earlier.
Daring flops onto the bed, bounces a couple times, and then stops moving, her faced pressed in between a mountain of pillows.
She says something but it comes to you as muffled nonsense.
“What?” you ask.
“Room service, please!” she says, picking up her head for a moment before flopping back down again.
That works for you.
==========
Dinner was all right. Nothing special, not great, but edible and convenient, which is lovely in its own way.
It’s nice to eat and not have to move. Room service is the greatest thing of all time, seriously. In your week of living, it’s the only thing you like.
Actually that’s not true. You like Daring, you guess, most of the time. And the other day you got room service and almost got murdered with a knife.
“All right,” Daring begins sitting beside you on the bed, “let’s get our plan for tomorrow all mapped out so we can just get up and go in the morning.”
“Sounds good to me. I guess the first thing I should ask then, considering you are the ‘expert adventurer’-”
“Damn right I am!”
“-is where should we begin looking? It’s a pretty big city.”
“No, the white eagle should not be inside the city anywhere.”
“How do you know?”
“Because of something called research.” She clears her throat and begins pacing in front of the bed. “Hundreds of years ago there was a small tribe of zebras that lived approximately 30 miles north of exactly where we are right now.”
“And they had the eagle?”
“From what I could gather from old texts and stories, this tribe did appear to have the eagle at some point before they were all wiped out by invading camels.”
“They ‘appeared’ to have the eagle? You don’t know for sure?”
“Pfft! Of course not, Jay! Geez, have you learned anything since you started hanging out with me? There are no certainties in my business. If somepony else already knows where an artifact is, then I wouldn’t be out searching for it. And it wouldn’t be ‘lost’ treasure, it’d be ‘found’ treasure.”
“I get the point.”
“My best guess is that it’s somewhere 30 miles north of here.”
“Unless those invading camels you mentioned took it.”
“I don’t think they did. There’s no mention of a white eagle statue with magic powers in their records, so I assume they never took it.”
“Okay. What exactly is 30 miles miles north of here?”
“Don’t know yet, I haven’t been there before. It’ll be a new experience for all of us.”
“How are we going to get there?”
“We’ll have to take an air taxi,” Daring says, sitting down on the edge of the bed again. “Only way we’ll be able to get there before the sun goes down tomorrow.”
“What time are we leaving?”
“Early.”
“What should we bring?”
“Everything. And water. And then some more water. I don’t think there’s a whole lot of civilization exactly around where we’re going, and being in the desert with no water equals painful death.”
You get the picture. “Is anyone else going to be there? Any of your old friends?”
She cocks her head to the side. “I don’t have any old friends.”
“I know. I meant enemies.”
“Oh. Hopefully not, but who knows? If they’re there, we’ll just have to be extra careful. If they aren’t, then we better find it fast, ‘cause they’re probably only a few steps behind us.”
“After we find this last artifact,” you ask, “what do we do?”
“Don’t worry about that, I’ll get us out of here real quick.”
“How?”
“Don’t worry about it.”
There she goes not telling you shit again. You don’t know anything in general, so it really doesn’t help your nerves that Daring doesn’t tell you keep you in the loop.
“Cool,” you say. “As long as you know what’s going on, I’m sure that’s all we’ll really need.”
“Exactly. Glad you’re seeing things my way for a change.”
“Should we turn in, then?” you yawn. “If we’ve got all that shit to do tomorrow, we should be rested up for it.”
“Actually, I was gonna ask if you just wanted to sit and chill on the balcony for a bit. We can just talk. Or stargaze or whatever.”
“Uh, yeah, let’s do it.” Has Daring ever wanted to do anything other than sleep, treasure hunt, or make fun of you?
Nope.
Daring, now with a large smile, hops off the bed and trots happily through the screen doors. You follow behind her outside and take a seat, attempting to enjoy the view. It’s a little chilly out here.
It’s not much of a view. You can tell exactly where the city ends and the vast desert begins. And tomorrow, you’re going into the desert.
What fun.
Why couldn’t you have popped up into a land of happiness and friendship?
“Beautiful night,” Daring audibly observes after a short silence, glancing between you and the pleasant view the balcony offers.
“That it is,” you say, but there isn’t anything ‘beautiful’ about it. This city smells a little weird, it’s cold now, and you can’t even see any stars because of all the lights in this city.
Then there is a silence, and in your peripheral vision you can see Daring twiddling her hooves from her seat.
“Hey, Jay?” she asks.
“Hmm?” You look over at her.
“What do you plan on doing…? Like, when this is all over?”
When what’s all over? “What do you mean?”
“I mean, we’re probably gonna find the last artifact tomorrow; I can basically guarantee it. Ha. I just want to know if you… like, have any plans after that.”
“Uhm. I don’t know. I haven’t really thought about it much.” You sit up a bit straighter in your chair. “I guess we’ll go back to wherever it is you come from.”
“Equestria.”
“Right, Equestria.”
“And then what?” she asks, holding her forelegs close to her chest.
“Well, I would’ve held up my end of the deal, which was to help you out in getting these artifacts. Then you’d hold up yours. You’d get all your money and your potential story for whatever books you write, and I’d go home… We’d both get what we wanted.”
You watch as Daring’s ears fold back and her red eyes turn down towards the floor, like there’s something down there worth looking at.
“Yeah,” she whispers to herself. “I’m a little more tired than I originally thought, Jay. I think I’ll get to bed.”
Daring stands up and, without looking at you, begins to make her way back inside.
“Daring? Are you all right?” you ask, getting up to follow her.
“Yeah, yeah. Just tired. You were right, we should probably turn in.”
You walk inside and shut the door behind you. Why did she get all sad all of sudden? Was it something you said?
All you said was what was established days ago. And she was the one who established it! She was the one who made the deal!
This is what both of you wanted.
By the time you fully enter the room Daring is already lying in bed, facing away from you on her side. That was fast.
You get in on your side, still confused as to why Daring is so odd, before turning off the lights.
“Goodnight, Daring,” you whisper, but she doesn’t respond.
After a few moments, you manage to fall into another uneasy sleep.
==========
Of course, as always, you have failed to sleep fully through the night. It’s still pretty dark outside, despite the city lights, but that’s not what woke you up.
Honestly, you don’t know the exact cause of your waking up in the middle of the night again. Perhaps it’s nerves. You should’ve taken a bath earlier, maybe that could’ve calmed you down.
However, upon waking up there are several things that you immediately notice.
The first thing you notice is the one thing that seems to have become a trend with your partner.
She’s fallen asleep on you. Again.
But this is even worse than the other two nights.
Daring has somehow managed to scoot herself over and put her head on your shoulder, as you are lying on your back. Her mane is running down your neck and a little onto your chest. Her fur is short and prickly, which isn’t uncomfortable by any means, but is rather a little ticklish.
One of the stranger things is that you have your arm wrapped around her back, as though you are holding her against you.
What’s even weirder than that, though, is that Daring went to bed on your left side, but she is now laying on the right side of you.
How the hell does that even happen?! Did she decide to change sides of the bed in the middle of the night? Honestly, how the shit did she get over here?
Every night, you two manage to become a little more intimate than the previous night.
This is not how you went to bed at all. How does she manage to be lying on you every single time?
“Are you doing this on purpose?” you whisper sarcastically to the sleeping mare, knowing she can’t hear you but needing to ask anyway.
Should you move your arm from around her then? You don’t want to wake her up. And she does look comfy.
Everybody deserves their rest.
Not to sound weird, but you actually like her lying where she is. She’s soft and comfy, like a teddy bear, except bigger, meaner, has wings, and can curse.
And she’s warm.
You’re both comfortable, so what’s the use in really breaking this up. She has to be doing this on purpose, right? This one cannot be your fault in any way whatsoever. You thought the past couple times may have been partially because of you in some way, but not this time. Not this time.
You know, you don’t want her to get off. At this very second in time, this is the most relaxed you’ve ever been in your entire one week old life. Everything is fine right now, for the first time ever, so why change anything?
You look down at your companion but it’s a little too dark to see much. You can only see her outline, and even that much is difficult to make out.
She might get pissed if she wakes up and you’re holding her like this, but if she does, she can only blame herself.
It would be just like her to get mad over this; she’s violently assaulted a stallion for hitting on her. But she can’t blame you. How the hell did she get onto the other side of the bed, seriously?
You hold her a bit tighter against you, enjoying the feeling of her soft, warm, short fur against your side.
One second after tightening your grip, the adventurous mare reaches a foreleg across your chest and wraps it around you, surprising you considerably.
Your heart rate was at a normal pace for a few minutes there, but not anymore. Is she awake?
She nuzzles affectionately into your shoulder before exhaling.
Your face is absolutely on fire.
“Daring?” you whisper nervously, hoping she doesn’t respond.
And she doesn’t. Nor does she move. Nothing can be heard except her gentle breathing.
“Daring?” you whisper again, but still receive no response.
Perhaps she was just moving in her sleep.
With that thought, you manage to control your breathing again. You can feel Daring’s chest rise and fall with each breath, and that relaxes you back to sleep.
There is no alarm alarm clock in this hotel, for whatever reason, but you have no need of one; Daring’s snoring and other antics is enough to keep you awake for most of the night.
The bed isn’t comfortable anyway.
Perhaps you would’ve gotten up to read or sit on the balcony for a bit if it wasn’t for your business partner resting on half of your body. She does manage to take up a lot of space for a little thing.
There were several times throughout the night when Daring was snoring directly into the side of your face. Most would find that irritating, and you did for a while, but mostly thought it was cute.
But after an hour of it you were ready to bludgeon her to death.
Daring acts all tough when she’s awake, but no one can act tough while they sleep. That’s one of the only times when you can see someone for who they are.
And Daring is just adorable.
In short, you didn’t wake her up. You looked at her for a while, tried to fall asleep, and sat with your thoughts for most of the night, which is never good. Your thoughts are driving you mad. If this feeling continues you will check yourself into the loony bin. It’s only a matter of time, honestly.
There is an ordinary clock on the wall (no alarm attached), that eventually reads 5 a.m. This ought to be a suitable time to wake up. Daring said you needed to start the day early, and this is early.
Should you wake up Daring directly? Or try to be sneaky about it?
Daring woke up by herself the last time this happened, right? You were never the one to wake her up.
Oh who gives a shit. You are 400% done with this.
“Wake up, Do,” you say, shaking her a bit and wondering why you called her ‘Do.’ Have you done that before?
“Stoooop,” she groans, not opening her eyes and readjusting herself on you a bit. “Stop.”
“Shouldn’t we be going somewhere?”
“Mm-hmm,” Daring stretches, almost hitting your face with her forelegs. She checks the clock before rolling on top of you and onto the side of the bed that she initially fell asleep on. She stretches again before getting out of bed.
“You all right?” you ask, remembering her actions from last night. She wasn’t too happy.
That’s not to say that she’s typically happy in general, but she’s not sad. She’s usually just a little irritated or pissed off.
“Yep.”
She sounds irritated and pissed off. Most people would leave someone who felt that way alone, but you aren’t most people, and Daring isn’t either.
“No you’re not,” you claim.
“Why would I lie about that?”
“I don’t know what you lie about.”
“You think I lie to you?” she asks, looking back towards you in the dark. You can still see her fairly well, but her eyes seem to glow in the dark. It’s weird. Daring’s just a pair of red eyes, ten feet away.
“I don’t know.”
“What do you know?”
You shrug. She got you on that one, you think. Eventually your memory ought to be coming back to ya.
Eventually…
“Get dressed,” Daring commands, putting on her own shirt. She manages to do the buttons with incredible ease, especially for a creature who lacks fingers.
You turn on the lamp from the nightstand, illuminating part of the room adequately before looking back to Daring.
She glances at you before turning away and gathering her things.
You notice that both of her eyes are almost entirely red. The whites of her eyes are now a pretty dark pink. Or, not white.
“You alright, Daring?” you ask again, a bit more concerned.
“Yes, Jay, shut up.”
She isn’t feeling too hot, for whatever reason. She’s not one for talking about her problems, for the most part. It’d be easier if she did, but that’s not really her.
Maybe she’s just tired. You’re tired.
You get up and get dressed, making sure you get all of your things together, which is easy because you have almost nothing. Just clothes and statues.
Daring gets whatever else you need and puts them in her own bags.
“Let’s do it,” Daring says, moving towards the door.
You do a quick double check over yourself, making sure you got everything, and follow her out the door.
The hallway is brighter than you anticipated, but as you’ve been awake for a while it doesn’t bother you all too much. Daring, however, squints and slowly trudges through the hallway, looking as happy as she ever does.
==========
There is basically no one outside the hotel at this time in the morning. The only beings out here are those who work at the hotel.
Comically enough, the night manager was the only pony in the lobby, and guess what he was doing.
Guess.
He was sleeping, obviously. Daring just left the keys next to him. You expected her to rudely wake him up, but she didn’t.
It’s pretty cold outside, surprisingly, but once the sun comes up you’re sure the temperature will skyrocket.
Damn deserts.
The only beings immediately outside the hotel are a few taxis. All of the taxis are run by regular looking ponies or camels. There is only one that is manned by a gryphon, who’s smoking a cigarette, so that’s where you’re going.
“We need a lift,” Daring says, causing the gryphon to look up and throw down her cigarette. Your companion pulls out her map and points to a spot on it. “This is where we need to get. How much?”
The gryphon squints at the map, before saying a multi-syllable number in another language. It must’ve been a big one, as Daring empties the rest of your gold coins into her talons before climbing into the seat.
Calling this object a “taxi” is pretty generous. It’s a buggy, but not even not. It’s basically a sofa attached to two bars that attach to a harness that the gryphons wears. It looks like a piece of shit.
“This thing is a piece of shit,” you say, always feeling the need to voice your opinion.
“We can walk the 30 miles if you really want to.”
“It’ll be better than falling to our deaths.”
“That’s what you think now,” Daring retorts, relaxing into her seat. “We could make it there, no problem, but how about the journey back? How much water do you think I can carry? Water is heavy and we would go through it real fast. We would die, and it wouldn’t be cool at all. It’d be disgusting. Daring Do will not die of dehydration.”
You still don’t know if you want to get in.
“You got a choice, Jay,” she says, and you imagine this is the first time you’ve ever had a choice in your life. “We either risk dehydration or falling to our deaths. You pick.”
“That’s easy for you. You can fly. If this thing breaks, I fall and you watch.”
“Don’t think I could catch you?”
“You can’t even get me 15 feet off the ground, so no, I don’t.”
“Choice is still yours, Jay. Walking or flying, you’ll probably die, but if you didn’t expect that since day 1 that you’re a moron.”
You climb onto the sofa, or “taxi,” or whatever, and the gryphon starts moving. She gets off to a good run before flaring out her wings and beating them hard, propelling you off the ground.
You grab onto the armrests and seat hard, already anticipating falling off. Even if this thing doesn’t break, you’ll probably fall off.
“See? Not so bad.”
You would roll your eyes but you can’t stop looking down. The city is getting smaller and smaller. You thought after that zeppelin ride that you would never have to fly ever again, but that was a stupid thought.
“This is awful,” you observe, the wind blowing hard against your face.
“Well, ‘awful’ is the best you’re gonna get.”
“Story of my life.”
“I’m gonna go back to sleep for a bit,” Daring says, leaning on your shoulder.
“Are you feeling alright?”
“Yes, Jay. Stop asking before I throw up.”
Well, you certainly wouldn’t want that to happen, now that you are both confined to this small space for at least the next hour.
By the end of this journey, however long it’s supposed to be, you know your hair is gonna be ruined. This wind crazy.
On your right, where Daring is sitting and sleeping, you can see the beginnings of a sunrise. At this point, the city is behind you, so the sun is raising only over the desert. It’s moderately pretty, but kind of scary, as you have the feeling of being in the middle of nowhere.
In the middle of nowhere, with your only friend, just as you have been all week. Nothing has really changed.
Only difference is, as Daring said, if you take too long, you’ll die of dehydration.
Wait a minute…
How are you supposed to make it all the way back to civilization after this? Do they have a taxi service in hell?
“Daring,” you say, “how are we supposed to get back? After we find the thing.”
She nudges herself a bit further back against your shoulder. “I got water and stuff. We’ll just walk back.”
“How long will that take?”
“I don’t know. Like, two days tops.”
“What if it takes us longer than expected to find the idol?”
Daring laughs, and it’s the first time she’s laughed all day. It makes you nervous and angry, how she’s so careless about this completely serious situation.
“It won’t.”
God! God why! Of all the beings in this world that had to have found you, why did it have to be this one? Why? Have you no heart?
She just doesn’t care! Either that, or she knows something you don’t!
And both of those options piss you off. If she’s keeping secrets, you want to know them. She shouldn’t be hiding anything from you. That’s not fair. And if she doesn’t care, she should. You haven’t stopped taking this whole situation seriously since day 1.
Of course, it’s a little hard for you not to take this situation seriously. You’re the one getting hurt, not her. Your back may be magically healed somehow, but it still hurts. The physical scars are gone but the mental ones grow every time Daring does something you don’t approve of.
“How do you know it won’t?” you ask, unable to pretend to be calm.
That sentence isn’t helping. She’s said those words more than anything else since you’ve met her. And if she says them one more time, just once more, you’re gonna punch her in the face. You can’t help it anymore.
Deep breaths. Deep breaths. In and out, slowly.
“I’ve got a feeling everything will be just fine,” she says.
Her feelings. Her feelings have guided your entire journey. While semi-successful, you also haven’t stopped getting injured.
“How expensive is this ride?” you ask. “Couldn’t help but notice how we’re suddenly broke.”
“Do you know what it takes to get a gryphon to fly out here?”
“No.”
“All of our money, apparently. Nothing flies out here. When we land, look into the sky and count the birds. If the number is greater than 0 then you’re hallucinating.”
“Then why was there a civilization out there?”
“No idea. I’m not a zebra. There must’ve been something out here they liked… Or maybe there wasn’t. They didn’t last too long out there. Camels killed ‘em all pretty quick.”
“Where did these artifacts come from anyway? Someone had to make them.”
“I can’t believe you’re just now asking that.”
“I never really thought it mattered much. Those statues are just my ticket home, I don’t care much for what they do.”
“Nobody does now, but if they fall into the wrong hooves or talons or claws, everybody will.”
“What do they do exactly?”
“Kill things. Anything. Whatever you want.”
“How? They’re statues.”
“It’s magic, idiot.”
Oh, yeah. Saying ‘it’s magic’ suddenly makes everything crystal clear. Good. You thought there was a reasonable explanation to things, but no. It’s magic, idiot.
“Why do you want it?” you ask.
“So nopony else can use it for whatever evil plan they got. I don’t want someone using these things to hurt ponies.”
“So you want the statues so you can save the world?”
“Huh. Yeah, actually.”
“Aww, Daring, you’re my hero!”
“Fuck off, Jay.”
“How do you use them?”
“What?”
“How do you use the things?” you repeat. “We’ve had two of the statues for a while now and haven’t killed anything, as far as I know. Not with the statues, anyway.”
“I’m sure there’s someway to activate them.”
“You don’t know how?”
“No. And I don’t want to. These things are dangerous. Better for us to find them and keep them safe.”
“That doesn’t make any sense. Why not just let them stay hidden?”
“‘Cause everypony is out looking for them.”
“Yeah, but why? If they’ve been hidden for hundreds of years, why does everyone and their mother think now is the time to find them?”
“Don’t worry about it.”
Holy shit.
You’re about to say something else, but think better of it. You’re not feeling well, and haven’t for some time, so maybe you should just be quiet for a while.
Daring doesn’t seem to mind that you’ve stopped talking, so you just keep quiet. You close your eyes for a few seconds but get scared that if you can’t see where you’re going then you will fall off the carriage sofa taxi thing.
So you just sit and wait.
==========
This is the new worst experience of your life.
Well, no, it’s not as bad as spending an afternoon with Kiduttaa, but this has got to be the next worse thing. Daring is casually sleeping on your shoulder while you clutch onto the couch for dear life.
You’ve been doing this for like an hour, too scared to let go.
You thought you’d nap, but you’re wide awake now.
How the hell are you supposed to know when you get to this place? It’s the desert. This particular section of the desert looks absolutely identical to every other part of this sandy hell hole.
“Daring,” you say, shaking your shoulder to wake her up. “Daring wake up.”
“What?” she asks sleepily, sitting up and looking down. “Are we there yet?”
“No. How do we know when we get there?”
“You woke me up for that?” she whines, putting her head back on your shoulder. “The gryphon will know. She’s counting the miles.”
“How?”
“Jeez, Jay, I don’t know, she is so just relax.”
“If you say so… Hey, Daring.”
“Hmm?” she hums, and you can feel her head vibrate on your shoulder.
“What’s your name?”
“What?”
“What’s your name?”
“Daring Do.”
“And that’s your real name?”
“That’s the one I supposedly got at birth. I was there at the time, but it was a while ago, so I can’t exactly recall firsthand.”
“What other names do you have?”
“My pen name is A.K. Yearling, when my books get published.”
“Why?” you ask, thinking that is an interesting choice for a fake name.
“Don’t know. It sounds cool.”
You nod, silently agreeing. You don’t know where all these questions are coming from all of a sudden. You guess you can’t sleep, so may as well find out as much about Daring as possible for a time.
Oddly enough, that’s not something you’ve attempted until now.
“How old are you?” you ask.
“What’s with all these questions, Jay?”
“I’m curious is all. You don’t have to answer if you don’t want.”
“I don’t have to do anything I don’t want. I’ll be 33 this fall.”
You do a double take. She isn’t old by any means, but she doesn’t seem to be that old. You would’ve guessed mid 20s tops.
“What?” Daring asks, noticing your strange reaction.
“Nothing, I just didn’t think you were that old.”
“I’ll take that as a compliment.”
“Sorry, I guess I did mean it as a compliment. You look pretty young.”
“Well, I’ve been doing this for a while. I’ve written who knows how many books and have been exploring in and outside of Equestria hundreds of times. I keep busy. With age comes experience, I’ve been saying.”
“You just sounded like an old lady.”
“Shut up, Jay,” she laughs. “I move around better than ever. I’m in the prime of my career.”
“At some point. I don’t look that far down the road, Jay, you should know that.”
You do.
“I don’t know,” she continues. “I know this won’t last forever, but I love it, so I may as well keep doing it while I can. One day it could all come to an end.”
“I get the feeling that the only way you will ever retire from this is when you die,” you say honestly.
“Heh,” she chuckles. “Hard to say. Don’t look to far into the future, Jay, you might not like what you see. Just live in the present for a bit, life’s a lot less stressful that way.”
Yes, but that doesn’t seem to be the kind of person you are. If there is one thing that amnesia cannot change, it’s who you are.
You think.
“You’re seriously 32 years old?” you ask.
“Yep. It’s not even old, Jay.”
“God, you are like an old lady.”
“Shut up,” she laughs. “How old are you then, if I’m so old?”
“Great question.”
“Oh yeah,” she says, apparently just remembering that you are physically unable to recall anything from your life, including age. “My bad.”
“No worries. I’m bound to remember eventually.”
“You will, Jay. Don’t worry about it.”
Daring has been trying to fall back asleep for quite a while now, and you have been preventing that with your talking, so you shut back up. It should be only a matter of minutes before you guys land anyways.
==========
The landing was even less fun than the actual 2 hour flight. No one alerted you that when the carriage landed, it stopped almost instantly and without warning.
As a result, you fell out and landed on your face. The sand was a relatively comfortable surface to land on, but now you have sand all over the place. It’s scratchy and not very pleasant.
You cursed a bit, and asked Daring why she didn’t warn you.
“What’d you think would happen?” she responded. “We’re landing on sand, not concrete. You think there’s an airport out here?”
You didn’t know the surface of the landing area played such a large role upon the impact of landing, but in hindsight, you should have.
Right after dropping you both off, the gryphon departs.
By this time, the sun has officially gotten its entire self over the horizon.
“It’s only a matter of time before this sand gets hot as fuck,” Daring says. “Try not to be touching it with exposed skin for very long. It’ll burn you up.”
“What about you?”
“I can fly,” she says, flapping her wings while remaining on the ground, just reminding you that she does have wings.
“Right.” You look around, seeing absolutely nothing in all directions except sand. “Where to now?”
“No idea. This should be around the right spot though.”
“How do you figure? This spot looks just like every other spot.”
“Don’t worry about it.”
There she goes again. For the love of all that is holy-
“Take the lead, Jay.”
“What?” you ask.
“I don’t know where to go, so why don’t you give it a shot. Just walk around a bit.”
“Why me? How are we gonna know when we find anything? We don’t have digging tools.”
“Don’t worry about that.”
Holy shit. She keeps saying that. If she says it again you’re going to murder her, honestly, you can’t take it anymore.
“Everything always works out,” she says. “So just listen to what I say and we’ll find this thing. Now, lead the way.”
You don’t know what she’s talking about. Lead the way? To what?
“Where should I go?” you ask.
She facehooves. “If I have to tell you where to go, you wouldn’t be leading, would you? Just go wherever you want.”
Fine. You turn to your left and walk in that direction, and Daring follows without audibly judging you.
There is silence for a while, you waiting for Daring to tell you that you fucked up somehow, but she never does.
“Feel anything yet?” she asks.
“I feel sweaty.”
“No, like, do you feel like you’re moving closer to the eagle?”
“I don’t know. I don’t know where the stupid thing is.”
“Damn, Jay, you’re not even trying! We’re never gonna find this thing unless you use your gut feelings. I know you don’t know where it is, just feel around for it.”
“Is that what you do?”
“Sometimes.”
“Well, you’re the expert here, why don’t you do it?”
“You’ve only been trying for 20 seconds!”
“Which is a wasted 20 seconds. C’mon, Daring, seriously, this is stupid. You just do whatever it is you do and we can leave.”
“No, Jay! Just-”
“You’ve been talking non stop all week about how you’re the greatest adventurer ever! So put your money where your mouth is and get this thing.”
“Jay, this is part of my plan.”
“This place sucks.”
“I just need you to give this a shot.”
“It’s sandy as fuck.”
“This is exactly what we’re supposed to be doing.”
“And hot as balls.”
“If you do this, we’ll get this thing, and that’ll be that.”
It’s gotten really hot really fast. There is no shade for miles. It’s gotta be over 100 degrees, or it feels like it. If you weren’t wearing shoes then the bottoms of your feet would have burnt off.
You’re already dehydrated.
It’s hot. You’re sweating. You covered in sand. Daring refuses to give you explanations on anything. You haven’t slept for what appears to be 48 hours now.
You continue to wander around as your shirt gets heavier and heavier due to your sweating, and your limbs threaten to give out.
The entire time you search, you complain and ask Daring questions, which she characteristically dodges and doesn’t answer.
==========
Hours must have passed. You don’t have a watch or anything but the sun was barely over the horizon when you started, and now it’s right above you.
Daring refuses to let either of you drink any water until the eagle is found. She wants to save it for the walk back.
You would kill for a bottle of water. Or a nap. Definitely a nap.
“Keep moving, Jay,” Daring orders upon seeing you standing still. “Not gonna find the eagle standing around like that.”
“Then how exactly are we going to find the stupid fucking thing?”
“I guess we’ll find out.”
You want to punch her right in her pony face. You would double your efforts into finding the ancient statue if it meant you could smack Daring. The fact that she seems perfectly composed in this hot, terrible environment is making you incredibly upset.
“Jay, keep walking,” she says again, like you didn’t hear her the first time.
Perhaps it’s just the frustration that has been building up since you two first met, but this incredible wave of energy suddenly rushes over you, and you immediately want to find a way to expel it.
All day, Daring has been saying and doing things without a single explanation. You, not being able to remember anything anyway, have felt even more lost than usual, and it’s not only angering you, but it’s scaring you.
And all that anger and fear have built up into what you are right now.
As Daring turns away from you, you see red. The desert and the cloudless sky become red and you act.
You physically grab ahold of Daring, tightly gripping your hands onto her before lifting her up and slamming her to the ground. In an instant, you are on top of her.
Her eyes get real small again as she looks up at you, and for the first time since you’ve met she looks genuinely nervous… and afraid.
Her expression doesn’t help you calm down any. If anything, it’s making you feel even more aggressive, as you now truly believe she’s hiding something.
“I’ve fucking had it, Daring!” you shout, keeping her firmly pinned to the ground. “I have no idea what’s happening to me! But I guarantee you know what’s happening! And you still won’t tell me! You’re not telling me anything!”
Daring puts her forelegs against your neck, just trying to force you away, but you’re way bigger than she is, and she’s a very light pony. If she doesn’t have space to utilize in order to fight back, she’s helpless.
“You’ve been keeping me in the dark about everything! Who were you talking to in the bar? Why are these artifacts in such random places? I can’t believe I ever trusted you in the first place! I only met you a week ago!”
She puts her forelegs against your chest and attempts to shove you off, but that fails. She manages to get a hind leg under your stomach and tries pushing you off, attempting to distance herself from you.
“Don’t even think about it!” you yell, smacking her hind leg off of you before you straddle her barrel, now fully on top of her. As she struggles, you pin her forelegs to the ground with your arms and squeeze your legs around her, still keeping her wings from spreading.
“Jay, stop!” the pegasus yells from beneath you, but you’re not listening.
“That’s not even my name! You live this double life out here, daring, but what is it that you do back home? Teaching? That’s original. How long did it take for you to make that up?”
“I didn’t make it up, J-Jay, it’s true! I’m not lying to you!” She tries to free her forelegs from your grip but you’re too strong. She tries to lift herself off the ground with her hind legs, but you’re too heavy.
“Why are you lying to me, Daring?! What are you hiding?”
“I’m not lying or hiding anything!”
“Then why do you keep fighting back?” you ask, keeping a firm grip upon her.
“Because you’re attacking me, you dick!” She tries to headbutt your arm in order to free her foreleg, but that’s not working either. “Jay, please stop, please. I’m not lying! I’m not lying! I can explain everything.”
You release her forelegs and wrap your hands around her throat, keeping them loose enough for her to breathe, but tight enough to know who’s in control. “Then start with why my wounds have all disappeared.”
She pushes her forelegs against your arms in a futile effort to make you let go. “I… can’t really,” she chokes out. “But wait! It’s because I’m genuinely unsure.”
“Yeah? You’re unsure? Really?”
“Yes, Jay!”
“No you’re not. You know why. Remember what you said when you saw how all of my scars were gone? Do you remember?”
She doesn’t say anything. She just struggles.
“You said, and I quote, ‘So it is true.’ Remember that? I do. That’s what you said. You didn’t tell me what you meant then, and you’re not telling me now.”
“J-Jay… I-I never said that.”
“Stop lying to me! Have you ever told me anything that’s true? Have you ever said one thing to me that wasn’t a lie? Have you ever said ‘Good morning’ to me and meant it?”
“Jay, stop this, you’re just tired. Let’s just take a break-”
“You fall asleep every night, and when I wake up, you’re fucking laying on me! Every! Single! Night! What are you trying to do?!”
“Nothing! That’s… nothing.” She wiggles under you, just trying to get comfortable under your weight as you slightly tighten your grip.
“You have these crazy mood swings, Do,” you say. “One second you’re making fun of me, the next you’re sleeping on me. One minute you’re yelling, the next you’re crying! What are you trying to do to me?”
She doesn’t answer. She simply looks up at you, waiting for you to do something.
Your vision starts coming back to you and your heart beat slows. You feel yourself becoming calmer after having released all of your built up angry energy.
You look down at Daring, who is still looking up at you, her eyes still small, hear ears at attention.
Her heart is beating fast and you can feel it bumping through your legs. Both of you are sweating now.
You’re angry, but you don’t mean her any harm. Removing your hands from her throat, you sit up, separating yourself from her a bit.
You stand up and take a few steps away from her as she turns over and coughs into the sand.
Daring remains lying in the sand. You look away from her but you feel her eyes following you as she tries to compose herself.
You take a few steps away, breathing deep and trying to calm down. Who would’ve thought you would attack your only friend?
But you can’t be so sure that she really is your friend. Can you?
You don’t know anymore. You just want to vomit.
“We aren’t even close to the end, are we?” you ask to whoever is listening.
The ground begins shaking, as if part of the desert wants to go one way and another part wants to go another way. At first you think it’s in your head until Daring flies into the air and shouts “Earthquake!”
The very same second she says that you fall onto your back. The Earth seems to get angrier and angrier and you can feel yourself being tossed around.
As soon as it came, it stops.
You are left lying on your back, staring straight up into the sky, wondering what just happened. How common are earthquakes around here?
You aren’t left thinking for very long, as again, you find yourself falling again. The ground gives way beneath you and sends you what feels like 30 feet downwards, below the surface of the earth.
Despite the seemingly lengthy fall, and landing hard onto your back, you remain conscious and apparently uninjured.
Looking up again, you can see the surface of the desert through which there is now a hole in which you just fell through. Beyond that is the blue sky that you were just looking at.
You fell in a hole. Lucky you.
“Jay?” you hear Daring call. “Are you okay?”
The wind has been absolutely knocked out of you, so responding is out of the question. But even if you could physically call back to her, you don’t think you would.
Just look where you are.
To your left continues the expansive room into which you have fallen. It is full of vases and jars and… what looks like dusty, sandy gold.
To your right is much of the same. Where are you?
“The tomb of Vitun Mies,” Daring almost whispers as her silhouette flies in. It is difficult to see her through all the dust and shit that’s flying around because you flopped onto the ground. “Infamously remembered as the keeper of the white eagle.”
What?
Did you seriously fall into a hole…
And that hole has the eagle in it?
What-
How-
What?!
“See,” Daring says, out of breath and rubbing her neck. “I told you everything would work out.”
“Why is it always me?” you groan openly, rolling around the sand in the hole you just fell into.
“You alright?” Daring coughs, flying above you. She’s slowly becoming more and more visible as all the dust and sand clear out that you unsettled with your brief fall.
“Mm-hmm,” you groan, rolling onto your side, feeling very tired, in spite of what Daring just announced.
You have somehow managed to find the lost tomb of Vitun Mies. You should be happy. All you have to do now is grab the eagle and leave. This is all over.
But you’re not happy, not one bit. How in the name of fuck did you actually find this place when it was lost for hundreds of years? Why was there an earthquake that lasted five seconds that sent you down here?
How is it that you, you of all beings, found this place when no one else ever could? How? What? How?!
Things make less and less sense the more you think about them. Holy shit. You assume it’s all Daring’s fault somehow. What else are you to think? She’s the only one who has been around when bad things happen to you.
Some may think that she’s also been around when good things have happened to you as well, but nothing good has ever happened to you. Ever.
That fall really calmed you down. You almost choked Daring to death about 25 seconds ago.
You were really pissed, but that’s because Daring is acting like a complete fuck. That’s not to say that you have suddenly forgiven her because of the fall, but you are very tired and not physically able to attack Daring, even if you wanted to.
You don’t want to fight anymore. You don’t want to fight anyone ever again, especially Daring. It has gotten very tiring.
Daring lands hesitantly on the ground almost right next to you, which is surprising as you did just attack her. She isn’t afraid of much.
“I’m always right,” she wheezes, rubbing her throat before having a bit of a coughing fit.
“You okay?” you ask, though you don’t really care whether she is or not.
“What? You mean after you attacked me? Or after I got to watch you fall twenty feet into a hole?”
“I’ll take that as a yes.”
“Yeah, yeah, I’m fine. Not like it hasn’t happened before. But if you try that again, I’ll beat the shit out of you, Jay. Don’t think I won’t.”
“Yeah? You gonna beat me up?” you ask, gradually rising to your feet.
“Yeah!”
“Sure, Daring, sure. That worked so well for you a few minutes ago.” You cough a few times.
“You caught me off guard, jackass! If you fought like a real man, I would’ve broken your scrawny neck.”
“Ha! Okay. You’re lucky I can control myself, Do, or I probably would’ve choked you to death.”
“Pfft! I was in control the entire time. You couldn’t hurt me even if you tried, Jay.”
“I didn’t hurt you at all?”
“Of course not, you pussy! An infant has a stronger grip than you!”
“That coughing fit you had a second ago says otherwise.”
“It’s dusty in here! It’s hard to breathe.”
“I know you like to think you’re a complete badass, Daring, but you’re not. You’re just a cocky asshole who steals things from dead people.”
She narrows her eyes and glares angrily up at you. “And what does that make you? A stupid, amnesiatic, paranoid bitch!”
You take a step towards from the small, angry pegasus, towering over her though she refuses to back down. She matches your intensity and doesn’t break eye contact with you for a second. She steps up to you, as well, and now there isn't even an inch of space between you both.
She only comes up to the middle of chest height wise, but she isn't backing down. She's glaring at you like she's about to attack. You're not going to back down, but you really can't fight her again. Not because you're physically unable to, as you aren't, but because it's just not mentally healthy. You're going to have a breakdown.
“I’m not going to fight you again, Daring!”
“I’m not gonna fight you either!” she shouts, bouncing on her legs a bit, bringing her face just that much closer to yours.
“Good!”
“Fine!”
You both turn and walk to separate ends of the underground tomb, trying to calm down. Why is Daring intentionally trying to piss you off now? Does she think she has something to prove because you attacked her and kept her down?
Probably.
And you aren’t helping yourself any by talking back to her. It’d be for the best if you just stopped doing that for a while, but you just can’t help it. It’s so hot out here.
“Let’s just find the eagle and get out of here.”
You nod, not wanting to verbally respond to your partner. Technically, you’re both still partners, though that will certainly change soon.
Simply being together when you first met was a pain in the ass, but now it’s simply impossible. Everything she says to you manages to upset you. Everything you say to her seems to piss her off as well.
The thought of you two only being together for the next few hours is a pleasurable one, and the only happy thought you’ve had in your entire life. You suppose you and Daring never should have spent more than a few days together.
She is very disagreeable. You assume she feels the same about you.
When was the last time either of you said anything decent to one another? Has that ever happened?
You can’t even remember anymore.
The constant back and forth sarcasm battles you have on an hourly basis has deteriorated your partnership into whatever it is now.
The sooner the eagle is found, the sooner you have fulfilled your part of the deal and all this bullshit is over. Now, you just have to find the stupid thing.
What you should have done, back at the hotel, is taken the bar of soap from the shower and sculpted it into an eagle with your fingernails. Maybe Daring would’ve bought it and you could have left already.
Just the constant frustration of everything that is happening is making you want to give up, check into a hotel, and sleep forever.
Just lay down, and sleep forever.
Or die. You wouldn’t be opposed to that really, but that would make everything you’ve done up until now worthless.
And so, you trudge on.
With your injured back and tired legs, you slowly search about the spacious grave of an ancient zebra king for an eagle. The dust and heat in this room make it difficult to breathe as is, but because of your recent fall, you are really struggling.
Apparently, Vitun Mies, right before he died, said something along the lines of “Okay everybody, listen up. When I die, you bitches are gonna bury me in this giant room under the sand. I don’t how you’re going to do it, but get it done. Once you got that big ass room all ready, I want you to get every clay pot you can find and just put it down there. Even if you find a useless, empty clay pot, I want it down there with me. Oh yeah, and put the eagle down there too. Thanks guys. Deuces.”
And then he died.
What a tool bag. There are more empty pots and chests and jars down here than you even thought imaginable. Was there anything ever inside these things?
You would ask Daring, but you’re still not talking to her. You’re both giving each other the silent treatment.
So, not knowing what else to do, you walk around and check every pot you find.
==========
Pot number 45, empty. Pot number 46, empty. Oh! Pot number 47!
Empty.
You pick up what you are calling pot number 47 and throw it against the stone wall, shattering it.
This is the biggest load of bullshit you’ve dealt with in the past 32 minutes.
Daring is still on the opposite side of the room, doing exactly what you are doing: picking up pots, finding nothing, and getting pissed.
You’re guessing you will know what the eagle looks like when you find it, but you have to find it. Or something. You haven’t even found anything! All the pots are empty!
Could someone have already come in here and stolen everything?
You think so.
Oh, look at that. Another empty pot. You can’t take a step without touching another empty pot.
This is the most pointless task you have ever undertaken.
“Look, I’m sorry,” Daring loudly sighs/groans from across the room. You turn to face her and notice she is looking over at you, her helmet on the ground, her ears back, and wings ruffled. “It’s hot as shit out here. I didn’t think it would take more than two days to find all this bullshit, and it’s taken us almost two weeks. I’ve got a lot of my old enemies randomly popping up all over the place and I don’t know why. I’ve been dealing with a lot of shit and I’m just tired, okay? I know we aren’t really ‘friends,’ in the strictest way, but we’re in too deep to be falling apart now. So… sorry!”
Daring’s pseudo apology has made you feel bad. Perhaps it’s the heat getting to you, but you now regret having choked the pegasus. She may have deserved it to some extent, but violence shouldn’t be the way you deal with friends.
Or business partners.
Or associates.
Or whatever you two are.
Eventually, you figure, you two will hate each other. You two can hate each other all you want, but not until you find the eagle. Until then, it’s best to just pretend to get along, if nothing else.
Daring continues. “We seriously aren’t going to get anywhere if we can’t even talk to each other. It’s been a long couple of weeks, it’s been really hot, really frustrating, really strange, I know. And I know we fight all the time, and I egg you on, but that’s just our relationship. I don’t mean half of what I say, you know?”
She looks down, takes a deep breath, and scratches at her foreleg with her other foreleg.
“You’re a good guy and have been an above average partner for a while. I don’t want us to start hating each other now… I don’t want us to ever hate each other, Jay. So, once again… I’m… sorry.”
Wow.
Did Daring just say all that? Or has she been possessed by the ghost of Vitun Mies?
You bite your tongue in order to not say that out loud. She’s being an adult in this situation, and you need to be as well.
“Jay, I just apologized. You gonna say something?”
Well, she’s sorta being the adult in this situation.
“I’m sorry, too,” you say, clearing your throat. “I really am. I know I give you a lot of shit, but I honestly just thought it was funny. Most of the time anyway. Recently it hasn’t been funny. We didn’t exactly meet in the most normal of circumstances.”
“Tch! Yeah, I remember. You were going to let me fall to my death unless I helped you.”
You scratch the back of your head. “I like to think that regardless of what you decided I still wouldn’t let you die. I was just scared and needed someone to help me… And nothing’s changed.” You laugh.
She does too, clearing much of the awkwardness from the air. “Regardless, I agreed. I’m a mare of my word, remember?”
“This world just feels so strange to me,” you continue. “I mean, I can’t remember my old one or anything, but this one just feels weird. I still haven’t remembered anything from my old world. Not even my name. For all I know, Jay is my real name.”
“That’d be a lucky guess on my part.”
“I still don’t understand anything we’re doing anyway. Everything I said when I… attacked you… I honestly meant. I just don’t get it. I'm so confused and it's driving me insane.”
“I understand that, and like I said, I can explain. Just not right now and not right here. Believe me, once I get these artifacts to Princess Celestia, I’ll tell you everything and then some.”
“And how long will I have to wait for that?”
“If we find the eagle now, 4 days tops.”
You think you can wait that long. What’s another few days?
“What happened up there, anyway?” you ask. “I mean, why did I just fall into this hole?” You point up to the hole now above you.
“It felt like an earthquake to me,” Daring says, but you aren’t satisfied with that answer.
“What are the odds of that happening, though? It only lasted seven seconds! Just long enough for me to fall into a hole. And not just any hole, it was the exact hole we set out to look for! Everything just happens too conveniently.”
“There is no such thing as convenience in this business. Everything happens for a reason.”
Maybe the eagle wants to be found? And it caused an earthquake to get you down here?
Eh. It’s possible. But then why can’t you find the eagle now? You’ve been looking for like twenty minutes and still don’t know exactly where it is.
This is the tomb of Vitun Mies, so it ought to be down here somewhere. Right?
“Are you sure this guy was buried with the thing?”
“The eagle? All my research says yep. It’s here.”
“What if somepony else already took it? All the pots and shit are empty.”
“If somepony took it, they’d be ruling the world or obscenely rich. I would’ve heard about that by now.”
“What if someone else found the eagle, took it, and then hid it somewhere else?”
She looks at you like you’re an idiot, as she frequently does. “Who the hell would do that? Why would anypony find a valuable artifact and then hide it again? That wouldn’t happen. Besides, Jay, look around!”
You do.
“See how it’s all dusty and shit? Nopony has been anywhere near this place in centuries. We’re in the middle of nowhere, in a hole. The eagle has to be here because it can’t be anywhere else. And as far as I can tell, the eagle can’t just move around on its own.”
“Then where is it, exactly? Like I said, the pots are empty.”
“Uh, I don’t know exactly. Most of these ‘pots,’ as you call them, are decorative or were gifts from the zebras he ruled over.”
“Everyone in this guy’s kingdom got him a pot when he died?” you ask incredulously.
“I know it sounds stupid, but yeah, they did. The ancient zebras in this area believed that when a king died, they would become rich with heavenly gold in the afterlife. And if the king was rich, then so was his kingdom in the afterlife. So, they buried him with pots and jars and shit so he could hold all that wealth.”
“That doesn’t make any sense.”
“It doesn’t matter if it makes sense or not, that’s just how they did things.”
No wonder they all died. “So the eagle isn’t in any of the pots?”
She shrugs, kicking over a jar with her foreleg. “I can’t say. It could be. He valued the eagle greatly, so it might be in there. Or…”
“Or what?”
“Let’s check Vitun Mies’ coffin.”
“Uh…” you begin, not sure how to respond. “Doesn’t that seem wrong?”
“Doesn’t what seem wrong?” Daring asks, already trotting over and standing with her forelegs on top of a coffin, ready to remove the lid.
“Disturbing the dead?”
“Disturbing them from what? You think he’s busy in there?” She bangs a few times on the lid. “Excuse me! Mr. Mies! Can we come in?”
She bangs a few more times on the lid before looking over at you with a fake surprised expression.
“Huh! No response! I guess he isn’t busy then. Or, maybe, just maybe, he is really really dead.”
“I didn’t mean it literally, Daring. I take it you’re not superstitious?”
“Only idiots are superstitious. The only being controlling your fate is you. Some dead zebra can’t do anything to me, no matter who he used to be. Now help me get the lid off already, the dust is fucking up my sinuses.”
Grudgingly, you get on the other end of the coffin and look down at the dusty lid. It’s flat and bare, with nothing written on it that you can immediately see. It’s a very simply coffin for a king.
“Ready, Jay?” Daring asks, seemingly very eager to take a look inside.
“As I’ll ever be.”
“One… Two… Three, and lift!”
At Daring’s command, you pick the lid up, which is lighter than you thought. However, Daring, without having fingers, doesn’t lift up her side at all. Almost as soon as you have raised the lid, you toss it away, revealing the inside.
“Thanks for the help,” you say sarcastically, just now remembering you’re supposed to be nice to her.
Daring doesn’t seem to hear you, though, as her attention is turned entirely to the inside of the coffin.
You look inside, seeing the pile of bones that was once a zebra king. But that’s all that’s inside.
“No eagle?” Daring asks rhetorically. “Fuck! Where is it?”
Your pegasus companion grabs the semi-mummified Vitun Mies and literally throws him out of his own coffin, leaving him to shatter and crumble as he hits the floor. The coffin is now entirely empty. No eagle.
No eagle.
“Fuck! Fuck!” Daring stomps on the ground with her forelegs. “Where is this stupid thing?!”
Daring turns around and starts kicking through bowls and pots and jars, breaking anything in her path, paying no respect for the dead. Something just seems wrong about that.
While Daring goes on her mini tirade, you begin collecting the pieces of Vitun Mies. Some pieces of bone smashed into such small bits that you will never be able to pick them all up.
So, you take the big ones and put them back in his coffin. Meanwhile, you hear Daring yell “Fuck” a few more times.
It’s odd. Seeing Daring so pissed off calms you down significantly. You don’t know why, but right now you feel content. Very strange.
You don’t take too much care with the remnants of Vitun Mies, but you do put most of him back in his box and put the lid back on. The last thing you need is Vitun Mies’ pissed off ghost flying around and fucking shit up.
But with your luck, that’s exactly what would happen.
Now that you’re feeling paranoid again, you decide to sit on top of Vitun Mies’ coffin to prevent him from getting out and to try and relax.
“If I ever see another pot ever again I’m going to hang myself,” Daring crankily mumbles, climbing atop of Vintun Mies’ coffin to sit next to you. “No joke, I’m going to kill myself in like 20 minutes.”
“Why don’t you just lie down for a bit, Daring?” you suggest. “Just take a breath.”
She glares at you.
“I wasn’t being sarcastic!” you say in order to stop her from attacking you. “We’re both tired. Let’s just take a break for a bit. I’ll get the water.”
==========
The eagle is nowhere to be found. Personally, you don’t believe it’s even in here. It might not even exist. And if it does exist, how big is it? It should be as big as the other statues, but what if it’s 300 times smaller.
Daring is now lying on her back on top of Vitun Mies’ coffin, staring up at the ceiling. Sometimes her eyes are open, sometimes they aren’t.
In the silence of the tomb, you begin to genuinely empathize with your tiny companion. Clearly, nothing has gone the way she anticipated.
You doubt she ever intended to be working with someone on this journey. She probably meant to do it all alone. So far, the only artifact that has been where she thought it was is the first statue. And she got that a long time ago.
It’s all been downhill from there for her.
She clearly isn’t having the best of times. For someone who claims to be such an expert at these sort of things, she isn’t very good. But if she is as good as she pretends to be, then you can understand why this has been so frustrating.
Truthfully, you haven’t been the best of companions for her, but you never wanted to be here in the first place. Neither of you want to be here anymore.
You grab a bottle of water and take a long swig out of it. The water is hot, but at this point you’ll drink anything. You kick over a few pots on the way over to Daring.
“Daring,” you say, shaking her a bit. “Here, drink.”
The red eyed pony sits up a bit and takes the water from you, chugging nearly the entire bottle.
“Thirsty?” you ask, but she doesn’t respond. Instead, she wipes her mouth with a foreleg and spits on the ground.
Right before flopping back down on Vitun Mies’ coffin. She puts her forelegs over her head and groans.
“It’s so hot,” she pants.
“If you’re overheating then take off your shirt, Daring,” you reasonably suggest. “And your hat.”
“You’d like that, wouldn’t you?” she tiredly replies, barely loud enough for you to hear.
“We’ve slept in the same bed for days. I’ve seen you without your clothes on.”
Has Daring ever seen you without your clothes on? You don’t actually think so.
She doesn’t respond, she just continues lying there, slowly dying of heat stroke. You best leave her to it.
==========
After a few more moments of unsuccessfully trying to find the eagle, you turn to Daring, who is still lying on the coffin.
“Why are we here?” you ask, causing her ears to stand up, but that’s it. “We have the other two artifacts, right? Do we really need all three? I think having two out of three is really good.”
“We gotta get all three,” she responds, still not moving. “Individually, they are powerful enough to take over a reasonably sized country. Put together, whoever controls them would be virtually unstoppable.”
That still makes you wonder then as to why everyone is only just looking for these things now, if they’re hundreds of years old. But you don’t ask. You’ve asked that before and didn’t get an answer.
Daring says, “One major problem I expect we will have very shortly is the lack of water we have. I didn’t think it would be quite this hot out here. And I really didn’t think it would take us this long to find the thing. We have enough water for another day, but probably not enough for the journey back to civilization.”
“So what are you saying? That we should leave?”
She sits up, rubs her eyes and tiredly looks over at you. “Well, here’s what I was thinking. I take half the water and fly back to the city and you stay here. You look for the eagle, and I return with more supplies.”
“How do I know you’re not just gonna leave me here?” you ask genuinely.
“Jay, again, if I was going to kill you, I would have done it a long long time ago. I’ll even leave the other artifacts here if you want me to. I can’t take you with me because you can’t fly, and walking back to the city would take two days. We don’t have enough water for a two day walk.”
Daring does make a valid point, but that doesn’t help your paranoia. In fact, nothing does. It is your entire life’s purpose to be paranoid and angry.
“If you think that’s best, then fine,” you say. “I trust you.”
Do you trust her?
Eh.
“Good,” she says, standing up and gathering some water for herself. “I will be back tomorrow. Presumably in the morning.”
“Wait, how are you gonna get supplies if we don’t have anymore money?”
“Pfft! Good one.”
You were being serious, but you assume she’s just going to steal whatever it is she needs.
“Alright.” She stretches out her wings and prepares to take off. “I’m going to leave you down here. It’s cooler during the day and might be warmer at night, I don’t know. I left you a blanket in the saddlebags when you go to sleep, so don’t freeze to death. Keep looking for the eagle, too.”
“Yep. Got it.”
“Hopefully you can find it tonight so we can just start the walk back tomorrow. The sooner the better.”
That it is.
“Alright. I’m off, Jay. Don’t wander off.”
“I won’t. Not that I could anyway. I’m in a hole.”
“Ha! Good. Alright, Jay, I’m going. And yes, before you ask, I will be back, I promise.”
You don’t think you were going to ask.
And with that, Daring flies through the hole in the ceiling and off to wherever she pleases. Hopefully with the intention of returning, but you can never be too sure.
For a while, you sit and contemplate your new life. If Daring decides not to come back, you will be stuck in this hole until you dehydrate to death. If something happens to Daring, you will be stuck in this hole until you dehydrate to death.
Perhaps you should’ve thought of this sooner.
Your entire life, as it basically has been for the past two weeks, rests completely on Daring’s shoulders. It’s been working relatively fine up until now, but things can change.
You would like to wait up top, but it’s too hot. You’re in a bad situation regardless of exactly where in this desert you are.
And who knows who is out there currently searching for you. Hopefully Daring doesn’t cause too much trouble in town. The last thing you need now is unwanted visitors, especially in such a remote area where they could theoretically do whatever they wanted to you.
Daring does have to steal whatever supplies she can, though. She’s probably good at that, she’s been stealing things her entire life.
But if she is caught, she goes to jail, and you die.
Assuming you can’t get back out of this hole again. You don’t know how you would, but you would try something.
Probably by building a makeshift ladder out of pots. You’d just pile all the pots in the center of the room underneath the hole in the ceiling and starts climbing.
However, by the time you do that, you would’ve wasted so much energy getting out of the hole that you’d just die up top.
All for an eagle statue.
What a load of shit.
==========
This is the first time you haven’t been with Daring for more than 20 minutes. You actually miss her.
The constant back and forth may be exhausting, but it was always entertaining to some extent. And familiar. It always gave you both something to do or focus on.
Maybe Daring has been so obsessed with coming up with things to say to you that she loses focus as to why you’re both out here in the first place.
Maybe that’s why the eagle still remains missing. The eagle could by right in front of your faces, but you’d never know because you’re too busy thinking of something clever to say.
And now that she’s gone, and there is nothing but silence, you just want to lie down and sleep for a few days. Where are you supposed to lie down? Most of the floor is stone, but there are a few sandy patches.
The sun hasn’t even gone down yet. Perhaps you should search for a while?
You decide not to drink anymore water until you absolutely have to, lest Daring actually does die and never returns. In the meantime, you kick over a few pots and overturn a few jars and bowls, finding nothing but hot air and sand.
What a magical place.
It’ll take you most of tomorrow to look through all these pots and shit, assuming you stop looking now and relax for the rest of the day.
Which is exactly what you decide to do.
It’s probably only late afternoon, but you decide to call it a day. You wouldn’t want to keep searching only to find nothing and have to go through the rest of the water.
You’re hungry.
How long can one go without food? You know it’s a couple weeks at least, so that’s good, but if you’re not going to eat at all, you’ll need a lot more water than you currently possess.
Working means getting hot. Getting hot means sweating. Sweating means losing water. Losing water means needing to drink.
That will lead you to drinking. Which will ultimately lead you to death.
This whole adventure of yours would suck even more so if you died at the end. What would have been the point of all this shit if you just died?
Not only that, but dehydrating to death is a horrendous way to die. Like, seriously, it's disgusting, and then your body would be left to gradually decay and potentially eaten by birds if they happened by.
Unlike Daring, you have some degree of respect for the dead, so you’re not going to sit anywhere near Vitun Mies. The guy may have been a psychotic doucheface in his lifetime, but you’re going to leave him alone now.
How great could that guys’ kingdom have been if it was all the way out here? Has this area ever been anything else but desert? What a crappy place to rule.
No wonder he started a genocide. It was the only thing for him to do. Boredom kills.
How powerful can this eagle be? If Vitun Mies had it and was killed by an army of camels, then how powerful can the thing really be? What did the camels use to kill him with? Who buried him down here?
As much fun as it is to ask questions and never receive any answers ever, you think you’ll stop for a while. How many questions have you asked in the past couple weeks?
At least 1,000. At least.
But, in all fairness, that’s all you can do. The only things you know are the things you experience or what you are told by Daring. And you don’t think half of what she says is true.
No need to think about that. Perhaps you should think about something that you haven’t before…
Maybe you should contemplate what life will be like when you get back to wherever it is you’re from.
Can you fly a zeppelin back to wherever you used to live?
Probably. Once you get back to the city, you should just find the general area of where you ought to have been from and immediately fly there. The sooner the better. As great as it is to be around mini animals all the time, it’s gotten tiresome.
You always have to look down when walking lest you trip or run someone over. It’s annoying more than anything else. Even if these animals are adorable.
If they just took more care of their hygiene, you’re positive they would look wonderful. Daring might even look like a girl if she took a bath and didn’t smell like sweat all the time.
She’s the only being, aside from yourself, who wears clothing. It’s just odd. No other mini horse thing wears clothes, but she always is.
Just interesting to think about. You wonder when she got into that habit. And how no one else did. Did her friends ever tease her for wearing clothes when no one else was?
No, no, of course not. She doesn’t have any friends.
As you sit and think, staring at the coffin of the once great zebra king, you notice the sun is setting and the air is cooling.
Now beginning to feel cold, you go to the bags in which the donkey and elephant are being held. The artifacts have a small blanket wrapped around them, which will now be wrapped around you.
There isn’t really a place down here to lie down and be legitimately comfortable. There are shards of what were once clay pots absolutely everywhere. Perhaps it was a bad idea to just start breaking everything.
You scrape together as much sand as you can into a cozy corner and lie down. It’s not what may be described as “comfortable,” but it’ll do. Soon enough, you will be lying in your very own bed. Everything will be worth it. Soon enough.
And with that happy thought, you turn in for the night, wondering if Daring is all right. You hope she is.
Not only because you depend on her for survival, but because you do actually seem to care about her to some extent, whether you want to or not. Sure you choked the shit out of her earlier, but she had it coming.
Surely everyone has someone in their lives they’d love to choke for a few seconds sometimes.
And she has always been around for you. Physically and mentally speaking, you’re not doing incredibly well, but through all of that, Daring has been around.
Daring could be a much worse partner if she wanted to be. Thankfully, she has kept her word when she said she would. So far.
She’s dragged you all over the world, it seems, but she’s still here. You ought to be thankful for that much. Anyone with half a brain would’ve left your giant ass a long time ago.
So either Daring has less than half a brain or she’s actually a good pony. Which one is more likely?
Deciding not to answer until she potentially comes back for you, you go to sleep.
==========
The sun has risen at some point, but because you’re in such a deep hole, you can’t see the sun and can’t determine the time of day. The sun could’ve just risen, or maybe you slept all day and it’s now about to set. Who knows.
Either way, Daring hasn’t returned yet.
There are still a million and a half pots that have not yet been searched, so you suppose you can do that while you wait for Daring.
Hopefully she returns very soon.
And with that hope, you begin your quest again.
==========
Just as you expected. Nothing.
Nothing has been found and nothing will ever be found. This hole is the grave of Vitun Mies, and it will be yours very soon.
You take a long drink of water before taking a seat on the ground once again. What’d be the use in finding the eagle if you couldn’t get out of the hole anyway? You’d find it, then die with it.
Thus, not much of a point in really looking for it.
“Jay!” you hear your friend yell down from the top of the hole. “You still alive down there?!”
Huzzah! She’s alive and has thankfully returned! Perhaps there is a god after all. You hope she brought a lot of water back.
“Yeah, Daring!” you yell back, rising to your feet and staring at the hole, waiting for her to come down. “Come down!”
“No, I need you to come up!” she says, though you still can’t see her.
Why does she need you to go up? Did she find the eagle up there?
“Why?” you ask.
Instead of verbally responding, one end of a long rope is thrown down, and you assume you’re supposed to climb it.
“You find the eagle up there or something?” you ask, but receive no response again. “Daring?”
After waiting a moment and not getting a single word in reply, you decide to just do as you’re told and climb the thing. You’re not sure if you’re good at climbing ropes, but it never hurts to try.
Unless you fall or it breaks.
Nevertheless, you grip the rope and begin climbing. Surprisingly, it’s easier than it looks, and you find yourself making good time.
Initially anyway, as you get closer to the top and the sun starts to blind you, climbing becomes more difficult. Instead of looking straight up the hole now, you have to squint your eyes and look straight ahead or down.
The sun can be such a pain in the ass.
After climbing for an eternity, and feeling very proud for having pulled yourself up so far, you keep one hand on the rope while putting another hand on the tiles that make up the ceiling of the tomb.
“I could use a hand, Daring,” you say, still unable to see anything. You didn’t know you could climb rope so well. What a useful skill.
Daring doesn’t appear to be coming to help. Odd.
“Daring?!” you call for her, but there is no response. What? Did she suddenly disappear or something? Why isn’t she answering you? Is she still mad about yesterday?
This would be a really mean prank to play just because she’s a little upset. Even if you did physically attack her…
Ugh. Right now you really regret doing that.
“Daring! I can’t see!”
Looks like you will have to just climb the final two feet on your own then.
Your grip tightens and you make one final lunge upwards, getting your upper body firmly on the hot sand of the surface of the desert. Good, you have reached the top.
Before fully climbing out of the hole, you take a look ahead of you, about to sarcastically thank Daring for the help.
It takes a few seconds, but your eyes manage to adjust.
Not only do you immediately see Daring, but you see some old, familiar faces.
Oh shit.
“Get out of there, right now!” barks one zebra, pointing a spear at you. Your heart immediately starts racing as this scene is all too familiar in your head.
Behind said zebra is Daring with a rope leash tied tightly around her neck. She appears injured, but you don’t have enough time to observe her before multiple zebras come at you.
“Don’t even think of going back down!” yells the same zebra with the spear. “If you try, we will cut the rope.”
You can either climb out or fall back down in the hole. Where would you hide if you went back down? You’d only piss them off.
You climb the rest of the way out and are instantly grabbed by multiple spear wielding zebras, who are quick to put a rope leash around your neck and force to your knees.
With a quick look around, there are at least a dozen zebras all around you. How did they get here? How did they find you?
They were hundreds of miles away! In a forest! You’re now in a desert! How in the fuck did they get here?
It’s really hard to breathe. Not just because of the rope, but because of the heat and your less than pleasant memories of these guys.
Daring, as you are now able to see, has a bloody nose and a few bruises but appears mostly okay. You hope they didn’t hurt her too much.
She won’t make eye contact with you.
“Daring,” you say, trying to get her attention.
She doesn’t look at you. Instead, her gaze remains focused completely on the ground in front of her.
“Daring!” you say again, clearly loud enough for her to hear. “Daring? Are you alright?”
“Shut up, you!” a zebra commands, hitting you hard on the back of the head, causing you to fall forward on your chest and face.
With another peek up at Daring, she still isn’t looking at you. Now she has her eyes closed tightly, with a look of pain now on her face.
“It’s been so long since I’ve seen you last!” a familiar voice booms, getting everyone to stop moving instantly.
Oh no. You remember that voice. You won’t ever forget it.
Why is he here?! Why now?! So close to the end, and this happens?! No!
“Hello, my old friend,” Kiduttaa exclaims with a large smile on his face, now standing before you. “It took a long time, but I have finally made it… I’m very happy to have found you.”
This can’t be happening. You know that this is impossible, but it’s happening anyway.
Even after closing your eyes and thinking really hard, the zebras still remain. This just figures, really. You should’ve known some stupid impossible shit was going to happen today.
How could your embodied nightmare possibly find you?! You don’t even know where you are! How could he?!
Did Daring lead them here?
She must have. How else could they have possibly gotten to this exact point in the middle of some desert? How did they manage to capture her, though, in the first place?
There are so many possible scenarios, and each is more bullshit than the next.
Unless this is all a mirage, but you don’t think it really is. The zebras smacked you around a couple times, and mirages can’t smack people. As far as you know.
So they have to be real.
And Daring still won’t look at you!
Did they hurt her? If they laid a single paw or whatever on her, you’ll tear these bastards to pieces!
Your heartbeat starts to pick up as you think of the various ways in which you could get your revenge. You imagine breaking out of your ropes and beating each and every single one of them to death.
You’ve taken the vast majority of beatings on this trip as compared to Daring, but you honestly hope it stays that way. Daring is your only friend (or acquaintance, pending on how you feel that day), and the more you remind yourself of that the more defensive you feel of her.
It’s odd. One day you want to help her, the next you want to kill her, the next you want to defend her. If you live to tomorrow, you wonder what you’ll do then.
Daring has a couple ropes wrapped tightly around her torso, keeping her wings pinned to her sides and then some. It looks extraordinarily uncomfortable, but that’s to be expected, as Kiduttaa does seem to hate her quite a bit. Her forelegs and hind legs are also bound together, effectively keeping the pegasus from moving.
And around the two of you stand a dozen zebras who look ready to kill you in a moment’s notice.
“Oh, it’s just been far too long,” Kiduttaa says. “I can’t believe you guys left! Just scurried away without even saying goodbye. I thought we were having a great time. And you even killed my boss!”
Kiduttaa walks behind you and you subconsciously flinch, unable to see what he may be doing. But you can still hear his insane voice as he keeps talking.
“I want to thank you for that one, though. He was a bigger pain in my side than anything else… always telling me I couldn’t do what I wanted. Now I get to be the boss! And it’s so much fun. Business runs much more effectively now. I only wish you would’ve killed him earlier.”
Well, Kiduttaa hasn’t changed one bit.
“Hmm…” he pretends to think, turning to you. “Now, do you remember where we left off when we last saw each other?”
Oh fuck. Unfortunately you do.
You subconsciously start to bend your back and try to sink a little lower in the sand, hoping he doesn’t try what he did last time. Does he have a hook? You don’t see one.
“Right! Artifacts. You two only had one of them last time, but after you escaped, ours went missing. Huh. I wonder what could’ve happened to it.”
You’re caught between not knowing what to say and being too afraid to say anything. As a result, you sit on the hot sand and stare. Meanwhile, Daring remains sitting and looking at the ground in front of her.
Kiduttaa pulls out a knife and holds it in front of your face with a smile. “I wonder… You two thieves disappear, and so does Valheita’s - or my - idol. Where am I to assume it went? Do you know where it could’ve gone?”
You sit in shock, not even hearing what he’s saying, too busy thinking about the knife he’s holding. Even when the sun glances off the blade and shines into your eyes, you’re too much in shock to close them.
“No? I think I have a great way to find out. It’s a method I’m sure you’re familiar with. Here, I’ll show you.”
He turns and begins to walk behind you, and you manage to snap out of your shock enough to start hyperventilating, but not to enough to move away or say anything.
“Hey!” Daring shouts. “Stop! Stop! Yeah, we’ve got the stupid fucking idols, just stop! Put the damn knife down, you psychotic douche.”
“There!” Kiduttaa says, touching the blade of the knife against your back, causing you to flinch and your heart to skip a beat. If this goes on any longer you’re going to have a heart attack. “Now was that so hard?”
With a quick flick, you feel the knife just graze over your back as Kiduttaa cuts a hole in your shirt.
You’re going to throw up.
“Well would you look at that?!” Kiduttaa yells while physically bouncing. “No scars! I was right all along! Ha ha! So it is true!”
What does that even mean?! Daring said the same thing!
“I knew there was a reason you two were travelling together, Ms. Do. Either you were screwing him or using him. Or both, but I won’t pry into your personal relationship. That’s none of my business.” He chuckles.
Daring just rolls her eyes and focuses back on the ground again with a scowl.
“Oh, happy day! The prophecy will be fulfilled, just as our ancestors have told us! Oh, I am the luckiest zebra alive!”
He walks back in front of you again, resheathing his knife.
“I don’t need that anymore. See how less painful these things are when you just tell the truth? Didn’t your mother ever tell you that honestly was the best policy? From now on I hope you will feel more open to sharing with me.”
Kiduttaa is definitely the only being within a 30 mile radius that is outwardly happy. Everyone else just looks miserable. You’re miserable. Daring looks like shit. His guards look like assholes.
The zebra leader spins with a smile and turns to Daring. “Same goes for you, Ms. Do! I know you like to lie a lot in your business to save your own skin, but the truth goes a long way. Ha ha.”
Daring doesn’t respond. She just spits into the sand.
“I almost forgot how much fun you guys were,” he says walking to the back of Daring and kicking her over with his hind leg, causing her to fall face first in the sand. “Ms. Do used to be so talkative, though.”
Daring, despite being tied up, tries her best to sit back up, only to be knocked back down on her face into the sand.
“Usually she can’t keep her mouth shut. Like most women! Ha! But now that she knows she’s lost, she just can’t find the words. Unfamiliar territory, I’m sure. If this is the first time you’ve lost, Ms. Do, then great! I’ll see to it that it’ll also be your last.”
Kiduttaa steps on the back of Daring’s head, forcing her face into the sand. Almost all of your fear is replaced by pure anger as you see the way your companion is being treated.
Your emotions are torn. Just yesterday you tried to choke Daring to death as she has become the biggest pain in the ass in recorded history.
But something inside of you is just absolutely enraged with seeing someone treat Daring like this. You assume it’s just because you still have a set of morals, unlike everyone else you’ve met in your life.
“Didn’t you need something, Kiduttaa?” you say, trying to keep yourself reserved so that you don’t get your ass beat. You know what this guy will do to you if he’s in the mood. “Or did you come out here to beat up Daring?”
“Hmm?” he asks, glancing over at you while rubbing Daring’s face into the ground. “Oh, sorry I forgot about you for a minute there. Just wanted to catch up with Ms. Do for a moment.”
He steps off the back of Daring’s head, and with a growing smile, kicks her hard against her restrained wing, causing her to turn over onto her back in pain.
The last iota of your logical mind forces you to physically bite down hard on your tongue before you are about to show Kiduttaa your extensive vocabulary.
In this precise situation, pissing him off would result in serious pain. You haven’t forgotten what he’s done to you. The scars are gone, but you don’t think you’ll have a full night’s sleep for the rest of your life because of him. You want him to keep his knife sheathed.
What a dick.
“What fun!” he exclaims, giddy like a schoolgirl. His smile, you notice as he shows all his teeth, is impeccable. You find it odd that his teeth are all straight and white, seeing where he lives. “Now, getting back to why I’m here. You,” he announces, pointing a hoof at your chest, “are going to hand over the artifacts you already have, and you will find the eagle for me. So let’s get to it! Genocides don’t start themselves, you know, and there are plenty of camels out there just waiting for what’s coming to them.”
Why does this shit happen to you? Why do you have to find it?
“Fuck off,” Daring slurs, sounding a little intoxicated as she sits herself back up again. You doubt she’s actually drunk, and assume her poor speech is a result of getting smacked around. Saying she looks ‘bad’ would be an understatement. Her face and a lot of her upper body is peppered in bruises, but she doesn’t show that she’s in pain. She’s always gotta act tough. “Even if you get them,” she spits into the sand, “I’ll just get them right back. Like always, Kiduttaa. It’s cute you think you have all this power when you’re really a pussy. I bet you feel like a real man, beating up a girl. How about you untie me and we’ll see who the girl really is?”
Kiduttaa laughs that same terrifying laugh he always has. You hate hearing it, and you’re genuinely afraid of it. It usually means something bad is going to happen.
Your instincts prove correct as, after a small chuckle, he suddenly stops laughing and punches Daring hard across the face, making her neck snap to the side and she collapses.
“You are in no position to be so disrespectful,” he casually remarks as Daring rolls over. “I will go below with your mute, unnamed friend here to find my eagle, and I will leave you up here to contemplate your life and hopefully learn some respect.”
He turns and gestures to the dozen zebras that stand around you.
“Have some fun with her, gentlemen,” he commands with a wink.
You glance at Daring, who’s bleeding out of her mouth and trying her best to sit back up again. Her defiant personality doesn’t allow her to stay down or shut up, and she’s paying for it.
Meanwhile, a few of Kiduttaa’s guards begin to advance on your injured companion, and you panic.
“Wait, , stop, wait, wait!” you say in alarm, fearing for Daring’s well being almost as much as your own.
“What? Do you want to switch places with Ms. Do?”
“N-No,” you stutter, feeling anxious now that everyone in the general area is staring right at you. You’d be much happier if they’d stop paying attention to you, but you have to say something!
Otherwise, both you and Daring are screwed.
“I will find you the eagle,” you say unsurely, considering you couldn’t find it all of yesterday and doubt you can find it now. “But I have a few conditions.”
“And why should I listen to them?” he chuckles while his subordinates brandish their spears. “You’ll do as I say, and that’ll be the end of it.”
“Everything will go a lot quicker if I cooperate, right? And I will cooperate… if you accept my conditions.”
Your spirits pick up as he seems to ponder what you are saying for a moment.
“The sooner we get out of here the better,” you add. “I know that. You know that. Every second out here is valuable, and I don’t want to waste time arguing.”
“I agree, but give me a reason that I would even want to consider your conditions.”
Fuck. “Uh… Because… You need my help! You even said so. If you didn’t, Daring and I would be dead by now. But you need us right now, and I’ll be willing to help if you accept. I’ll do whatever you ask.”
“Let me hear these conditions of yours then.”
You swallow hard as your heart rate increases. You almost forgot how hot and shitty this desert was.
Damn you’re thirsty.
“First, no one touches Daring. There’s no point in beating her around, so just leave her alone.”
He smiles his shit-eating, toothy grin down at you. “I knew the two of you were a couple. Ms. Do always travels alone. I knew she wouldn’t get around with someone else unless they were in love.”
“I don’t see how me not wanting her to get torn apart by your goons means I’m in love with her, but think what you want.” Psycho.
“What is your next condition?”
“Next condition?” You think for a minute, feeling unprepared. “Uh… That’s it, I guess.”
“So when you said, ‘I have a few conditions,’ you meant to say ‘I have one condition.’ Yes?”
“Uh… Yeah, I guess.”
“I spent many years of my life learning and perfecting your language. The least you could do is speak it properly.”
“My bad. It’s hot.”
“Yes, yes, that it is. I cannot fault you. Ms. Do said you have both been out here for many hours.”
“Do you accept my condition?”
With a smile and glance back at Daring, he agrees. “Albeit reluctantly, I accept your condition.”
“If me and you are going down-”
“You and I.”
“What?”
“You misspoke again. You meant to say, ‘You and I.’”
God damn you are not feeling well enough to put up with this guys’ shit.
You clear your throat and lick your dry lips. “If you and I are going down in that tomb, Daring comes too.”
“That was not part of the deal. That was not your condition.”
“I don’t trust you and I don’t trust anybody else here. If Daring is left up here, I’m pretty sure your men will do whatever they want with her. She comes with me.”
“Or what? What will you do?”
“I won’t help.”
He laughs, and you try your best to maintain your composure.
So far, in this particular conversation with your least favorite being on the planet, you are impressed with how you have handled yourself. You haven’t broken down or let him just roll over you.
And he’s actually listening, which is the weirdest part. He could technically do whatever he wanted to you both. But for some reason, he doesn’t.
Why doesn’t he kill you? You know he really wants to.
Why does he want your help, though? Why doesn’t he want Daring’s help? Or why does he need either of your help in the first place?
Does he seriously assume you know where to find it? No, that can’t be it. How could you know?
Does he think you’re hiding a map?
No. If he did, he’d just take it and kill you both. The fact that you are alive right now is simply the most confusing thing you’ve ever pondered.
“If Ms. Do comes with us,” Kiduttaa continues, “Eight of my men will as well. The other four will stay up here.”
“Deal.”
“Good! Let’s find me that eagle then, shall we?”
Kiduttaa takes out his knife again and approaches you.
Your heart rate immediately picks up as you see Kiduttaa walk towards you with his weapon. From where you’re sitting, the knife looks like it may as well be a sword. Who needs a knife to be that big?! What could he possibly be cutting in his spare time to warrant a weapon of that size?
There’s gotta be some way out of this!
Before you have a seizure, Kiduttaa slices the ropes that bind your wrists, and cuts you free from your bonds.
You seriously feel sick.
You stand up and expect to be knocked back down again, but you’re not. The surrounding zebras look prepared to kill you, but what else is new.
“I will not untie Ms. Do,” Kiduttaa says.
“Then how is she supposed to get into the tomb with us?” you ask.
“You’ll carry her! And don’t try anything funny, or she dies.”
You figured.
Daring remains seated on the sand, looking disoriented, and she probably is through a combination of the heat, dehydration, and getting the shit kicked out of her every once in a while.
“Up you go, Daring,” you say, picking her up and shifting her around onto your back. She puts her bound forelegs around your neck to hold on, and her hooves just dangle around your chest.
She feels really weak, like she’s barely hanging on. It’s disheartening, but surely everything will somehow work out.
You would ask if she’s all right, but that’s a stupid question. Of course she’s not all right.
“Chin up, Daring,” you whisper, walking over to the rope. “And stop talking shit for a while or they’re really going to hurt you.”
Daring doesn’t say anything. She just sort of repositions herself on you, putting the side of her face against the side of yours. Her hind legs wrap around your waist and she squeezes them, holding her in position.
But she still doesn’t say anything. You reach your hands behind you to hold up her butt, lest she start slipping and choke you to death with her rope.
For a small pony, she’s got pretty wide hips and a big butt. It’s not the best time to think about that or say anything, so you don’t.
But hey, thinking about anything other than the reality of your present circumstance is preferable.
==========
Climbing down a rope isn’t especially hard, and Daring doesn’t weigh much, so this whole ordeal isn’t that big of a deal.
Besides, if zebras can do it with their spears and shit, you definitely can. They don’t even have fingers.
“Jay,” Daring whispers in your ear, and you can feel her breath on the side of your face. “I’m so sorry.”
“Don’t worry,” you say, more concentrated on climbing down the rope than what she’s really saying. You don’t care if she’s sorry, there’s not anything you can do about it now.
“I’m going to get out of this. You’ll see.”
“I believe it.”
You’re starting to believe it less and less.
==========
Daring is being kept in the corner, and you can’t help but glance over that way to make sure she’s alive. There’s a few guards by her, staring at her, waiting for the opportunity to do something.
If they did do anything, you don’t know how you’d respond. If you tried to stop them, you’d be killed. If you did nothing, you’d probably be ultimately killed.
You’re going to die here.
Now you hope the ghost of Vitun Mies does exist and decides to start fucking shit up ASAP. Then maybe you could escape. If that doesn’t happen, you’re screwed.
And it’s not happening. Oh well.
You still hope his ghost exists though. That way you’ll have someone to hang out with in a few minutes. You two probably won’t be friends, but you can still talk about stuff.
The zebras are quickly growing impatient with how little you are finding. As you search, all of them are just sitting around, talking in some foreign language and fiddling with the two artifacts you and Daring used to have. They don’t seem to know how to work the things either.
Part of you wants to know what they’re saying.
But the rest of you doesn’t. You think you can assume what they’re talking about, but as long as you don’t know for sure, you get to keep some part of your sanity.
Meanwhile, Daring has gone back to not looking at you again. Whatever.
You’ve seriously got to find this thing within the next 60 seconds or you think you’re going to die.
You keep looking, but the eagle is seriously just not here. Simple as that.
==========
You can’t find this stupid thing. The eagle isn’t even here!
But you’re not going to tell anyone that. You’ve decided that instead of genuinely searching for something that isn’t here, maybe you can find an alternate way out of the tomb. These old tombs that are filled with treasures have to have some trap doors or something, right? Isn’t that how this shit works?
You need to ask Daring, but she’s far away.
Surely getting out of here with your life will be heavily influenced by Daring’s freedom. The only way you could possibly get out of here is if Daring isn’t tied up or dead.
You don’t know what to do.
Even if escape was theoretically possible, where would you go? You’d have to walk miles and miles back to civilization.
Even with plenty of water, that’d be a humongous pain in the ass. But you don’t have water. So it’s impossible.
What are your options?
Stay here, find the eagle, get murdered.
Attempt to escape, fail, get a spear in the gut.
Attempt to escape, succeed, die of dehydration.
There’s a common theme here that you aren’t enjoying. This is complete bullshit, just like everything else that has happened to you in your entire few week old life.
This search attempt has lasted about 4 minutes in real time, but in your head you’ve been looking for hours. It’s only a matter of time before they get bored and kill you for fun. It’s a safe assumption in this case.
“Where is it?!” Kiduttaa calls from the other side of the room. “You better not be stalling!”
“N-No!” you respond. “Nope. It’s around here. Just give me a minute.”
“I’ve given you plenty. Stop wasting my time.”
Oh fuck.
Fearing that the end is near, you speed up your search process, but still find nothing.
==========
Kiduttaa went over to talk to Daring, but you’re too far away to hear what they’re saying. You’re still just looking, but time is not something you have a lot of.
He’s probably just taunting her anyway. He’s probably like ‘Fuck you slut’ and Daring’s probably like ‘Eat my ass, queer.’
Crazy times in the tomb.
By now, you have been legitimately searching for at least a half an hour. Why isn’t anyone else helping? Why do you have to do it alone?
Almost every pot in the room is now broken, and behold! Nothing.
Huge fucking surprise there. Maybe you should just kill yourself and save them the trouble.
“Done yet?!” Kiduttaa asks.
“No!”
“How hard could it be to find the thing?!”
“I could use some help!”
With a huff, Kiduttaa tells his soldiers to start looking too while he sits on his ass.
You are quick to regret asking for help as there are now 8 zebras around you. They’re legitimately looking, but that doesn’t make you feel any better. You can’t help but feel like they’re going to attack at any second.
At least they’re away from Daring.
Kiduttaa is still talking at Daring, and Daring still isn’t saying anything or moving. You’d think she’s dead already.
With no apparent regard for their ancestry, the zebras around you start destroying everything they touch. If it’s not the eagle, they don’t care about it.
One of them even flips over Vitun Mies’ coffin, sending the poor shithead back onto the ground in bits.
Some people just can’t catch a break.
“Attack! Attack!” a zebra yells down from the hole up top.
Everyone freezes and looks up at the hole.
Attack? What attack? Who’s attacking? Are they attacking? If someone is attacking them, how did they get here?
Why is everyone popping up in the middle of the fucking desert?!
“Don’t just stop and stare!” Kiduttaa shouts. “Get up there and fight, you idiots! Did you think this was going to be easy?!”
Half of the zebras are quick to respond and rush to and up the rope as fast as they can manage, which isn’t incredibly fast.
“Did you think we were the only ones looking for these things?!” Kiduttaa yells, not climbing the rope, just issuing orders. “Get up there and kill them! I don’t want a single one of those cocksuckers getting out of here alive!”
Half of the zebra soldiers continue to scurry up the rope, while the other half stand at the bottom, looking ready to defend Kiduttaa.
You can’t help but root for whoever is fighting the zebras right now. You don’t know who they are, but you hope they win. Your life literally depends on it.
You need to free Daring! Maybe if you free her, you won’t even have to worry about whoever is attacking. So what if they get the artifacts?! How important could three animal statues be?!
What really matters right now is escaping with your life.
As you start to make your way over to Daring, you look up at the hole and see the first zebra has just reached the top.
And he immediately receives an arrow to the forehead, causing his body to go limp and he collapses and falls. As he falls, he knocks off the other zebras struggling to climb the rope, and they all fall back down to the ground.
It’d be almost comical if you weren’t at risk of dying. Nevertheless, it makes you happy watching your captors get what’s coming to them.
The bodies land with a loud thud. Only one of them being dead, you think, but the others are definitely hurt.
Still looking up to the hole, you see someone look back down at you. You recognize the form almost immediately.
When travelling on the zeppelin the other day, Daring threw some guy wearing a black uniform off. Whoever is up there has a white coat, a horn on their head, and is wearing the exact same black uniform.
Shit!
That means they probably want to kill you too. Now you know you’re fucked.
Daring’s list of enemies is too big. She really needs to make a friend or two.
As more and more ponies begin to approach the hole in the ceiling, you take your chance and rush over to Daring.
Luckily, the remaining zebras are much too busy to pay any attention to you, and you get to her without a problem.
“Time to fucking go,” you say quickly, grabbing Daring’s foreleg restraints and attempting to untie them.
“Jay,” she whispers while you still fiddle with the rope. It’s so tight! You can’t even get them to slip off over her hooves. “Jay. Look at me.”
You don’t. This whole situation is too stressful and you actually have a chance to get out of here with your life! No time to lose.
“Jay, look at me.”
“No, Daring, shutup.”
“Look at me.”
“No time for your sappy bullshit, Daring, we gotta go.”
“Please, Jay.” She physically pulls her forelegs away and out of your grasp. You look up at Daring’s face, and she almost looks… defeated. It’s depressing. “I’m so sorry.”
“Don’t be sorry, be quiet.” You grab her forelegs and forcefully bring them back towards you. “Shit happens. We’re gonna get out here alive.”
“...Yes we are.”
Untying knots is a real pain in the ass. You have to guess which part to pull on and hope it comes out. You manage to guess correctly and the knot around her forelegs comes loose. You get the rope around her hind legs off as well.
You glance behind you to see what’s going on, as all you have been hearing is shouting in a couple different languages.
Those white ponies in black uniforms are now inside the tomb, and even more and quickly sliding down the rope as reinforcements. There are way more ponies than zebras.
Another zebra gets shot with several arrows in the chest before collapsing. The zebras only have spears, but the ponies have arrows. You wonder who’s going to win this one.
You’re running out of time.
Maybe if you could just untie Daring, then she could get out of here. You’d be happy if at least she could escape, but there is no way you’re getting out of this mess. Daring can fly, she can escape!
There is no way you’re going to climb up the rope without getting shot to pieces, but if Daring could fly, she could get out quicker.
Fuck! You should’ve untied her wings first! Damn it!
The ropes around her wings is incredibly tight; much tighter than you originally thought. You think it could be giving her some serious trouble breathing. Hopefully the rope doesn’t damage her wings. She needs to be able to fly.
These zebras are completely insane. How could they tie Daring up this tight? The rope is so taut that it’s bending her wings outwards from the middle. How much could they hate possibly hate her?
All this fuss over a few statues. The more you think about it, the stupider it seems, and it already seemed incredibly stupid.
The noise behind you is steadily dying down, but you’re too focused to check. Hopefully they take their time with killing each other. You just need a few more seconds!
With a good pull, the knot in the rope comes out and the rope drops from Daring’s midsection, freeing her wings.
Despite your excitement, Daring still doesn’t even move.
“What are you doing?” you ask. “Fly! Get the fuck out of here!”
“I’m so sorry, Jay,” she whispers, grabbing one of your hands in between her hooves.
"What the fuck is the matter with you?"
“Halt!” you hear someone yell, and it feels like the voice came from just a few feet behind you. “Halt!”
Shit. Are you going to die now?
You turn and face whoever it is behind you.
Some relief washes over you as you realize that he isn’t a zebra, but all that anxiety returns as you realize that it’s still one of Daring’s enemies, and he’s holding a crossbow in his magical grip.
You don’t know if it’s the same guy Daring threw off the zeppelin or not. They all kind of look the same, especially when wearing those uniforms.
You raise your hands, not wanting to get shot.
“Aufstehen!” he yells, pointing his bow up and then back at your head.
Assuming that means ‘get up,’ you comply and stand, keeping your hands raised. A few other uniformed ponies begin to advance upon you.
“Halt!” you hear a female voice shriek from behind these men. Immediately and without hesitation, all ponies in front of you stop dead in their tracks and stand at attention.
You contemplate whether or not to be afraid. Do these guys want to kill you? The guy Daring threw out of the zeppelin might, but you don’t know about these ones in particular. They could.
Or maybe they just want to use you, like Kiduttaa did.
Speaking of which, where is he?
Being taller than all of these little ponies is a bonus as you can easily see everything behind them with little to no issue. There’s a few dozen of these white ponies down here now, far outnumbering the zebras. But where did the zebras go?
As you keep scanning the room, you see a few of the white ponies making a very organized pile of dead bodies in the corner.
And sitting next to that pile, tied up, is a still breathing Kiduttaa. Fuck. They didn’t kill him? Why?
You would.
These white ponies are clearly not friends with your ex zebra captors. Maybe this could be one of those ‘the enemy of my enemy is my friend’ sorta situations.
Two ponies approach you and Daring from the center of the room. The first is a white unicorn with blond hair and blue eyes and is wearing one of those black uniforms everypony else seems to be wearing.
Her cutie mark, you notice, not that you were looking back there, is a pink heart, and in the middle of that heart is a… fucked up “X” looking thing. But it’s not really an X. It’s like if someone crossed a Z with another Z. You don’t know how to explain it.
But you feel like you know what it is. You feel like you know what it’s called.
The other pony is a stallion with black hair, blue eyes, and has a smoking pipe as a cutie mark. He’s wearing a red beret.
Why does that description sound familiar?
“Oh, my love! My love!” the stallion shouts with joy, trotting up to Daring, who looks less than pleased.
His love? Who the fuck is this guy?
“Hello again, my dear!” The stallion leans in and tries to give Daring a kiss while Daring tries to back away into the wall.
“Ah! Nein!” the mare yells over at him
The stallion stops and jumps back. With a blatant frown, he returns to standing next to the shouting uniformed mare.
What the fuck was that?
“Hallo,” the mare greets with a smile and a deep bow. “I am called Aryanne. It is an honor to stand in your presence.”
What?
The stallion rolls his eyes. “You may call me Fluage.”
Behind you, you hear Daring spit.
“My love, we have been apart for so long. I wish-”
“Shut the fuck up,” Daring says.
“Quiet!” Aryanne demands. “Cuff them. We will be right back.” With that, Aryanne and Fluage walk away with Aryanne talking animatedly with the stallion.
A white pony approaches you, and with his magic, restrains your hands behind your back with metal cuffs.
“Bleiben Sie hier, bitte,” the pony says, sitting you against the wall right next to Daring. Then he cuffs Daring’s forelegs together.
“They want you to sit here,” Daring explains.
“I figured. Good to see you’re talking again.”
“Hmm.”
“Your wings are free,” you whisper.
“I know it.”
“Fly away.”
“No.”
“No?”
“No.”
“What’s going on?”
Daring shrugs. “Captured again. Remember my list of enemies I gave you a while back?”
“Sorta.”
“They’re all on it. The Kansallissosialistinen and Fluage.”
“Right. The people with the complicated name and… who?”
“Remember the guy I told you about who was only out to find me? So he can… I don’t know, be with me?”
“Oh shit.”
“Yeah. That’s him. Doesn’t look like he’s changed much.”
“Well, shit.”
“You said it.”
You don’t even know what to say anymore.
==========
Aryanne has come back over to join you and Daring but did not bring Fluage back. Maybe he was being too much of a creep.
She set out her soldiers to start looking, but no one’s going to find anything.
Some of the white unicorns have begun searching through the room, turning over and breaking pots. Same old shit.
They won’t find the eagle like that. In fact, they won’t find it at all. It isn’t here. It can’t be. You’ve searched this whole place twice over.
“Have you found the eagle yet?” Aryanna asks you, electing to remain standing by you and Daring rather than do any physical work. You assume it’s because she’s an officer. She has to be.
“N-No,” you respond, not sure if she’s willing to kill you.
“Hmm…” she ponders, holding up the donkey and elephant statues she must’ve taken from Kiduttaa. Good thing she hasn’t brought him over to where you and Daring are. “Did you sleep here last night?”
“I did.”
“Where?”
“Where in here?”
“Ja, where exactly did you lie?”
“Uh… Just over there a bit.” With your hands tied up, you’re forced to nod in the general direction of where you were the previous evening.
Aryanne takes a few steps over to where you still have your bottle of water from this morning. “Right here?”
“Yep.”
“Graben Sie!” she shouts, her voice easily carrying to all corners of the tomb. Following orders, a few white unicorns start digging where you said you slept last night. “Bringen Sie mir ihn!” She barks again, pointing at Kiduttaa.
A few more of her men grab Kiduttaa and rush over to where you, her, and Daring are. Once they get close enough to you, they unceremoniously drop your least favorite zebra like a sack of potatoes.
It just figures that the moment you thought not being next to this asshole was a good thing, they’d just bring him over to you.
Kiduttaa’s face, once black and white, is now almost entirely purple and red from bruising and cuts. The rest of his body is almost the same, and his legs are restrained with metal cuffs. He looks like complete shit.
And that actually makes you happy. Maybe if you ask nicely they’ll let you hit him a few times.
As if to taunt Kiduttaa, Aryanne places her new donkey and elephant statues at her feet and slowly caresses them, all the time staring at the zebra with a smile.
Kiduttaa says nothing.
This just makes you so happy! Right now, you’re Aryanne’s number one fan, no doubt. She’s basically telling Kiduttaa to go fuck himself! And he can’t say anything back!
Oh, maybe this day is going to be okay after all.
“Ja, ja!” a soldier yells. “Es ist hier, Frau Hauptmann!”
Several soldiers run to Aryanne, holding what is unmistakably a statue of a white eagle. It’s dirty, but it looks to be the real thing. It’s just covered in dust and sand.
And last night you spent hour after hour sleeping on top of it.
What?
How did you sleep on top of it and never realize? How deep was it buried? How did Aryanne know where to look for it? How did she know it would be under where you slept?
What?
Should you feel relieved? Daring didn’t seem to want these guys to get the artifacts either. And now they have all three!
Oh well. What are you going to do about it?
“The eagle! There it is!” Kiduttaa shouts, practically in tears.
Aryanne levitates a brush with her magic and wipes away the dust and sand from the final artifact before giving it a kiss.
Then she places it on the ground next to the donkey and elephant.
“Please!” Kiduttaa shouts, attempting to crawl towards the line of statues. “Let me just hold it! Just for a moment, I want to hold it! I want to touch it!”
“Nein! Zurueck!” Another white pony literally kicks Kiduttaa in the face, knocking him backwards. “Abschaum,” Aryanne mutters.
“There,” Daring announces, looking up at Aryanne. “You got your stupid eagle thing and the rest of them. Am I done now? Can I go?”
Can she go? What the fuck is that supposed to mean?
Aryanne takes a moment to look Daring up and down before she glances at you. With a shrug, she orders her to be released.
A uniformed soldier unlocks Daring’s cuffs and she gets up. Meanwhile, you’re still on the ground.
“Daring, what’s going on?” you ask.
“What do you think is going on?” she replies. She begins walking away from you and towards Aryanne.
“I don’t fucking know! If I knew, I wouldn’t ask.”
“God damn it, Jay! You’re so clueless! You’ve got to make everything harder for everypony because you’re just so stupid sometimes. Do I really need to spell it out for you?!”
You don’t say anything. You’re just surprised to see how angry Daring seems to be at you.
“Let’s recap for a second. I left last night. I show back up with the zebras. Just before they kill us, these guys show up. How did all of them know where and when to arrive? Either they found this place themselves, or somepony told them!”
“You told them?!”
“Of course I fucking told them, you idiot! Who do you think is paying me for all this?”
“You said your government pays you.”
“Yeah, they put up some money, but these guys put up way more! They give me cash, I give them the artifacts and you. In the process, I get rid of Kiduttaa. Anyway you look at it, I win.”
“What do you mean? What do you mean you’re giving them me?”
“Exactly what it sounds like. They wanted you, I said okay. They wanted the statues, I said okay. Now, they give me money and I go home. My adventure is done, Jay. I even told you like ten minutes ago that I was going to get out of this.”
“I’m so confused.”
“I know you are. It’s because you’re stupid.”
“Why?”
“Why? Pfft! C’mon, Jay, stop taking this so personally. I know you’re new to this business and all, but come on.”
“You’re just giving me up? You were supposed to help me!”
“I know! But plans change sometimes. Adaptability is the most important trait in my profession.”
“How could you do this to me? After everything I did for you, how could you just do this to me?”
“Stop that, Jay! At any point since we first met did you ever think that I actually liked you? Since when were you a priority in my life? I’ve been trying to get rid of you for weeks but you just can’t take a hint. Now you’re paying for it.”
“What do you-”
“I’ve never liked you! You’re impossible to get along with. You’re big, clumsy, annoying, and slow me down, but those days are over now. You’re not my problem anymore.”
How can she even say that! This isn’t the real her! The real Daring must be somewhere else! “What? You’re just going to leave me behind?”
“Uh… From your perspective, I guess so. Really sorry, Jay, but I can’t help!”
You don’t know what to say, so you say nothing. Daring is going to leave? She’s leaving. She’s just abandoning you.
“Whore!” Kiduttaa spits. “The only thing women are good for is using men to get what they want.”
Aryanne and Daring both glare at him. “Be quiet.”
“When I am free once again I will destroy you! You will beg for death when I am done with you!”
“I said shut up!”
“I will tear you into pieces for the way you are treating me, bitch! I will let all the zebra stallions in my kingdom breed you-”
“I’m gonna need one more favor,” Daring says to Aryanne as Kiduttaa continues his rampage.
“Naturlich,” she responds.
Daring points a hoof at Kiduttaa, and with a glare and an evil look you’ve never seen Daring wear, she requests, “I hate zebras. Especially that one. Kill him for me.”
“Jetzt?”
“Right now.”
With barely a shrug, the unicorn's’ horn lights up in a blue glow, and just one second later, Kiduttaa’s head does as well.
Kiduttaa stops talking.
Do you want Kiduttaa to die? Absolutely. But what Daring requested is kind of odd. As far as you know, she’s never executed anyone…
But as far as you knew, she never betrayed anyone before either. Maybe she’s just having one of those days.
Kiduttaa scowls and closes his eyes tightly, not saying anything. The whole room goes silent and everyone inside focuses on the zebra.
A few seconds later, his head explodes outwards, causing bits of skull, brain, and blood to be strewn in all directions.
“Fuck!” you yell in surprise, not expecting that to happen. Bits of Kiduttaa splatter on your body, as you are kneeling next to him.
What the fuck was that?! That unicorn just blew up his fucking head! Literally! There’s bits and pieces of his skull and brain all over the place!
Mostly on you. The entire left side of your body has been sprayed with blood.
How the hell are you supposed to feel about this?
You’re mainly in shock. How did that even happen? Unicorns can make people’s heads explode? You better be nice to this girl.
At that moment, your body has decided enough is enough, and you throw up. After doing so, you feel a lot better until you glance over at Kiduttaa again.
Oh god. You really feel sick now.
You’re overjoyed that your least favorite being got what was coming to him, and you should be happy (or happier), but you’re not. You’re just confused. It’s nothing new. If anything, now the confusion is even worse.
They literally blew up his damn head! How?!
Are they going to kill you? Why did Daring order him to die? Is she going to kill you too? Why are you tied up and Daring isn’t? Aren’t these Daring’s enemies? Why don’t they kill her?
You have no idea what’s going on. Same shit different day.
“Good?” the unicorn asks.
“Y-Yeah,” Daring stutters, not sounding great.
You think you’re going to pass out.
“Wasser!” the unicorn shouts, looking down at you. She glances down at her black uniform and becomes visibly annoyed when she sees a very small splotch of blood on her collar. “Scheisse,” she mumbles.
A stallion runs up to the unicorn mare with a large jug of water and she flicks her head towards you. The stallion rushes to you and puts the jug up to your mouth.
Over the course of the next few seconds, you chug and drain the entire bottle of its contents, having almost forgotten how great water really is. It’s so underrated. Sure it doesn’t taste like anything, but at this has got to be the greatest thing you have ever drank in your life.
As you near the end of the jug, you look over at Daring and the blond unicorn. The unicorn is patting her collar with a handkerchief (hoofkerchief?), trying to get the blood off.
Daring has more blood on her shirt, but you can’t remember how much of that was already there and what was the result of Kiduttaa blowing up.
Should you care?
Right now, as you begin to get your mind back and organized, you hope most of the blood on Daring is her own. Fuck her.
“Ahem,” Daring clears her throat, as she continues to look uneasily at Kiduttaa’s body. “Yeah, thanks for killing him and all, but I meant, like, with a bow or a knife. I didn’t think you’d blow up his head.”
“This way is more fun. All zebras deserve death. All work and no play, as they say.”
“Riiiiiiight… Okay, yeah, I think I’m gonna head out now. Thanks for the money. Thanks for killing him,” she points at Kiduttaa. “And be nice to Jay and he’ll do whatever you want.”
“Naturlich.”
“Seriously, though, be good to him.” Daring trots over to you, and before you can decide if you want to headbutt her or not, she lunges forward and… kisses you?
What?
“Mmwah!” Daring pulls away with a smile, and you’re too stunned to attack her. “Ahh! I’ve been wanting to do that for a while. Take it easy, Jay.”
…
What the fuck was that for?!
Daring begins to walk away, shaking her hips and swaying her tail with every step. She looks at a furious Fluage on the far side of the room and blows him a kiss.
“If you want, Fluage, give Jay a kiss. It’ll be the closest thing you’ll ever get to me. Ha!”
“I’m onto you,” he replies, red in the face.
Daring just rolls her eyes. “Keep dreaming, weirdo.”
And with that, your partner puts on her saddlebags and slowly flies away, going out of the hole and out of site.
And out of your life.
She just… left. Just like that.
You keep looking up at the hole, waiting for her to come back, waiting for her to tell you this is a joke. A really cruel joke.
…
But she’s not coming back.
“Aww! Do not be sad!” Aryanne says, slowly approaching you before putting nuzzling her head under your chin, and you have to mind her horn, lest she kill you with it. The feeling of her soft mane surprises you, and you don’t know how to feel about her trying to comfort you right now. “Everything will be fine now.”
No! Everything will not be fine! Everything is getting worse and worse! You thought you caught a break for a second there, but just like everything else, it’s one step forward and two steps back.
This is awful! Daring was supposed to be the only thing you could rely on! And you can’t even do that anymore!
You think you’re going to throw up again.
Sensing your troubles, Aryanne begins to physically walk around you, her body never breaking contact with yours. She rubs her face and side against your shoulder and your back. After a second, her rump is almost right in front of your face, her cutie mark is almost touching your nose.
She slides her tail along the underside of your chin as she keeps walking. You really don’t want to do to.
“Mein Freund,” she coos, and if you were already feeling hot before than you are moment away from bursting into flames. “Your friend told me to treat you nicely.” She nibbles at your ear. “And I will do just that. You will give me what I need to serve my Fuhrer, and I will give you… everything.”
With that, she pounces from behind you and locks her lips with yours. Your eyes open wide in surprise, but her blue eyes are completely shut. Her lips are soft but stay very firm until she pulls away.
She looks at you with her big blue eyes and flicks her mane out of her face. She gives up a big smile.
“We will have much fun together,” she says, giving your cheek a good lick. “Your dirty, and don’t taste very nice, but I will fix this problem very soon!”
What?
...
Huh. This situation isn’t looking too great. But it’s definitely better than being with Kiduttaa. Maybe this isn’t all so bad. You can work with this. Just give them what they want and you’ll get what you want… Just like Aryanne said.
Is any of this really even happening? Have you ever even asked that basic question? Is this some weird, fucked up dream?
It has to be. It has to be. Daring couldn’t have just left you; not after all you have done for her, not after she has stuck with you this long.
Why would she leave you now? Was this her plan all along? You don’t see how she could’ve planned this. Surely she can’t see that far into the future to predict this shit would happen.
You think.
How could anyone have foreseen all this bullshit happening? Nostradamus couldn’t have figured this one out. Tribal zebras? Militaristic unicorns? In the middle of the desert, no less.
One: How the fuck did either of those groups even get here? Two: How could they have possibly known you and Daring were here? You sure as shit didn’t tell anyone where you were. And you assume Daring didn’t tell anyone. How could she have? She’s been with you the entire time! She barely knew where she was going.
But who knows? Maybe she did have this all planned. Maybe she figured it was just the best option for her. Maybe she got pissed after you choked her and had enough of your shit. After all, she did go back to the city all by herself. Maybe she brought them back.
But that doesn’t make any sense either. Those zebras were not your friends, and they showed up with Daring. And they beat the shit out of her. It wasn’t a fake beating either. Those were real, genuine, painful hits they put on her, and she bruised for real.
Then she had Kiduttaa killed. That whole situation is still odd to think about. You love that he’s dead and got what was coming to him, but someone you didn’t even know got to kill him. And she killed him in a rather… graphic way.
Is graphic the right word? You wouldn’t say it was a gruesome death, ‘cause it didn’t last very long. It was just unexpected at that particular moment in time.
You don’t know.
You don’t even know if you should feel betrayed. Surely you ought to, but at the same time, did you ever truly believe anything that Daring said? Have you ever took anything she said to heart?
You don’t know for sure. Perhaps somewhere deep down you actually believed her, but there is also that one part of you that keeps saying “told you so.” So it shouldn’t be too much of a surprise, but for some reason you feel absolutely crushed.
Demoralized isn’t even a good enough word to describe you. You don’t even feel like existing anymore. Not to say you would prefer not existing, you just don’t want to exist. It’s an odd feeling, but that sums up your feelings right now.
Forget about how you feel about Daring for a second… How did she feel about you? Did she ever like you?
When you first met she bitched all the time, and you admit, you didn’t take it easy on her either. Sometimes you had lighthearted moments, sometimes you thought she was a real girl…
Then you went and choked the shit out of her. God damn it.
Daring is a very prideful woman. It doesn’t take a whole lot of time and effort to notice that. Thus, you ‘beating her up,’ so to speak probably pissed her off more than you think.
But would she get rid of you, just like that, because you attacked her? Apparently so. You don’t see any other reason for getting rid of you at this point.
Why would she kiss you? Before she left, she yelled at you, kissed you, but most importantly, she said “I’ve been wanting to do that for a while.”
Fucking why? And then Aryanne kissed you! Honestly, why?!
If Daring didn’t want to hang around with you, or keep her word, or whatever, she could’ve left you a long ass time ago. She could’ve snuck away while you slept. Hell, she could’ve walked into a crowd and you’d probably never find her on your own.
So what’s so significant about now? You must’ve pissed her off.
Do mares have that time of the month? Did you just piss Daring off at the wrong time?
You are the champion of asking questions with no known answer. The only being who could answer any of your thoughts is probably miles away by now.
==========
This carriage is unlike anything you have ever seen.
From all the other carriages you have seen over the past couple weeks, they are all just simple boxes, maybe with a tarp or something overtop, that is attached to and pulled by someone. That’s the only way to make carriages move; if somepony pulls it.
But not this one.
This carriage is a box, like every other one, but no pony is required to pull it. Instead, in the front, there is a smaller box where one pony sits and can automatically control it. On the bottom of the carriage is a large engine that makes the whole thing move.
Very innovative.
Only downside is that it is pretty loud, as it is very powerful. And it better be to be able to drive on this loose sand. It’s a very interesting machine, and it makes you wonder what other kinds of things these ponies have. You haven’t seen anything like it.
These ponies must be really smart to make something like this.
You wonder how these ponies got this machine here without you or the zebras having heard it. Maybe they just parked it further away and walked over to the hole? They obviously didn’t drive right up with it, you’d’ve heard the damn thing.
Whatever. Doesn’t matter anymore. Good thing they have it now, though, you’re not in the mood to walk.
Good thing these ponies aren’t making you walk. If Kiduttaa and his zebra pals had this contraption, they’d tie your wrists to the back of it with a loose rope and literally drag you along for the fun of it.
These ponies also have these bicycles that have engines on them too. It’s like a normal bicycle, but with no pedals or anything. A couple of them, you saw, had sidecars. What a simple yet ingenious contraption! It’s very impressive.
What do these ponies want? They haven’t harmed you in anyway whatsoever. All they’ve done is arrest you.
The first time you encountered zebras they attacked Daring and knocked you out. You knew they were assholes from the start.
Relatively speaking, these ponies seem very nice. However, you’re reluctant to acknowledge them as nice, as their leader just ripped the skull of a zebra into a thousand pieces without blinking an eye. Her henchmen didn’t seem to have much of a reaction either.
Daring didn’t react all too much either. She was surprised, but not disgusted or anything. Meanwhile, you vomited.
They gave Daring a lot of money for turning you over. Since when were you worth a pot of gold? Do they think you have some great knowledge about something? You don’t have knowledge about shit.
Confusion confusion. At this point you’ll be willing to do anything for whoever happens to own you at the time just for a couple night’s good sleep and a bath. If these unicorns want something, at this point, you’ll probably just give it to them, regardless of what it is.
Unfortunately, you cannot see what else these ponies have right now as you sitting in the back of the carriage, wrists cuffed behind your back, with no window to look out of. You could be anywhere, but given the desolate area, it is safe to assume you’re still in the middle of the desert. Not much to look at anyway.
You tried to count the total number of unicorns Aryanne had with her when you were in Vitun Mies’ tomb, and you estimated somewhere around 20. And it didn’t look like any of them were killed when they battled the zebras. They did very well for themselves.
Which is pretty scary. The zebras kicked your ass and the unicorns kicked the zebra's ass. Logic would dictate that the unicorns could theoretically really fuck you up.
They haven’t yet.
Inside the carriage with you is Aryanne, which is odd. You wouldn’t think she’d want to sit with a prisoner. You’d think she’d either make you walk or leave you here alone.
Aryanne is a very clean mare; the cleanest you’ve probably ever seen, and prettiest if you had to say so. Her white coat is nothing short of pristine, to the point where it almost looks like it’s shining. She definitely doesn’t look like she just killed someone a few minutes ago.
And then there’s you, who has been through a lot today already and look like it too. You have a hole in the back of your shirt, you’re sweaty as hell, you’re miserable, and have blood stains on the side of your body.
The physical difference between you two is incredible. Even her uniform looks impeccable. How her and the rest of her buddies can wear black uniforms that cover most of their bodies out here in this heat is beyond you.
They must really care about style in… wherever they’re from.
The carriage is pretty spacious. You imagine this thing is used for troop transportation, as it could probably fit a dozen soldiers in the back.
That’s probably how these unicorn soldiers got here; by riding in the back of this thing. But now they have to walk, as you and Aryanne are the only ones occupying it. That’s a shame.
They probably aren’t too happy that you get to sit in here while they walk along in the hot sun. You know how much of a pain in the ass that is.
Aryanne is sitting at the opposite end of the thing, right by the door that leads out of the back of the armored carriage.
You wish this thing had windows or something. They could literally be taking you anywhere.
Plus, then you’d have something else to look at other than Aryanne. She’s pretty and all, but you don’t think she’s all right in the head, to say the least. And you two staring at each other for this long is awkward.
Other than looking at her face, which you are hesitant to do, you look at her uniform. It’s just so clean! And it looks very fashionable. Whoever designed it is a genius.
Aryanne has several pins hanging from her chest. They’re medals; what they mean and how she got them, you don’t know. Probably best not to ask too.
“Dark, ja?” Aryanne asks, pointing at her own black uniform with a smile. “We did not expect to have to… venture into the desert. If I know we would have been here, we would be wearing… ah… not yellow... tan! Not black. It is much too hot. And is shit camouflage.”
Not only did you not ask, but you don’t care. You just nod along, not wanting to piss anyone off anymore.
==========
Aryanne seems nice and all, but she’s starting to get a little weird. Sure she killed Kiduttaa by blowing up his head, and that was weird, but now she’s being weird in a different way. Kiduttaa had it coming, so destroying his skull is justified. You assume you would have done the same thing.
But now she’s just sitting across from you, staring, smiling. You look at the ground for a few seconds, then look back up to her, and she’s still looking at you. Smiling.
Not a big smile; she’s not showing any teeth or anything, but it’s still noticeable. The carriage is also pretty small, so she has to sit pretty close to you. It’s not very good for your nerves.
She’s still wearing her uniform, which seems odd to you, considering how hot it is even in the back of this vehicle. You wouldn’t be wearing all that crap if you were her. She’s got her black military dress coat that goes down to her haunches with a red band that goes around her foreleg. She’s just missing her hat, as she shows off her blonde hair, highlighting her big blue eyes.
She hasn’t done anything to hurt you, and has been very friendly compared to your recent captors. But you still have reason to believe she’s going to try and hurt you. Everyone else has.
“I’m not going to hurt you,” she says, seemingly reading your mind, making you paranoid.
Did she seriously just read your thoughts? Unicorns have horns and magic and all that bullshit, but can they read thoughts?
Oh god, you hope not. Are you not even safe in your head? You’ve just spent a lot of time thinking, so did she hear any of that?
To test this theory, you start thinking. You tell Aryanne in your head, that if she can read your thoughts, then come over and sit at your side, and slap you across the face. Even if she doesn’t do the action, hopefully she’ll say something about it.
She stays where she’s seated. “Not a single pony here will hurt you. I doubt anypony will ever hurt you again. Ha! I doubt anypony could hurt you ever again.”
You don’t know what she means by that. Should you ask? Do you really want to open a line of discussion with this mare? Does that mean she can’t read your thoughts? Is she normal or fucked up in the head?
Probably the latter, but at this point, so are you.
“What do you mean?” you ask, shifting a bit where you are seated. Unfortunately, your movement is very limited due to your cuffs.
She laughs as a response. She laughs as though that’s all you need as an explanation. And it’s making you upset.
“What’s so funny?”
Her laughter slows and gradually stops as she realizes you aren’t even smiling. She clears her throat.
“Es tut mir leid… I s-suppose, this situation is… is happy for me.”
“Happy how?” God damn, most of your life is spent asking questions. Why can’t anyone ever give a straightforward answer?
She starts to chuckle again, but stops herself quickly. “Happy how?” She points a hoof at you. “I found you!”
What? She found you? What does that mean?
“What do you mean? Why would finding me be a good thing?” It’s starting to get really hot in here.
“We’ve been searching for you for years. Almost a full decade now, and I was the one who found you. Mein Fuhrer will be so proud!” She squees, her eyes getting real big.
“Searching for me?” you ask, more confused than anything else. The fuck does that even mean? And they’ve been searching for a decade?... what?
“Naturlich!” She smiles at you, expecting for everything to be making sense.
It still doesn’t.
“But why?!” you ask for what feels like the hundredth time.
“What do you mean, why?”
You take a deep breath, feeling like you’re going to pass out of frustration. It’s like talking to Daring again, but worse, as english isn’t her first language. At least her accent is kinda cute. “You wanted to find me? Me?”
“You, ja.”
“Why?”
“The ancient zebra prophecy. You complete it.”
Yeah, of fucking course. Great. No one can have a normal day. You know you’re going to regret you’re next question. You’re about to bang your head against the wall of the carriage, if only to kill yourself.
“What prophecy?” you sigh. You feel like you ought to feel more stressed out by what she might say, but you’re not. She can say anything at this point and you don’t think you’ll care, you’ve been through enough shit.
“Wait. You don’t know the prophecy?”
“Nope.”
“Fraulein Do never told you?”
“No.” Your frustration is really starting to build.
“She knows about it. This is what she does for a career.”
“And she never told me about it, so please just tell me what the fuck it is!”
She nervously clears her throat and pauses for a moment. “Okay, okay... Centuries ago, many centuries ago, there was a tribal zebra leader called Vitun Mies.”
You knew that.
“He wanted to unite all zebra tribes in the region, in this region, and drive out all the camels, who he believed to be an inferior race, when in reality they are both equally inferior.”
Talking to her is getting less and less fun.
“It’s almost funny how highly they think of themselves. They’re useless creatures, really. They’re societies may have meant something a millenia ago, but they have done nothing since. Anyhow, nopony knows how exactly, and historical records don’t say, but Vitun Mies acquired the three idols.”
Right, you knew that.
“Some call them the Idols of Liberty. Some call them the Idols of Oppression. We call them the Idols of Domination. Now, Vintun Mies’ armies were small in number, but he used the power of the idols to start a large genocide, killing over a million camels in a few short months. He took over the whole region, driving out or enslaving every camel here.”
You nod along, letting her know you’re listening.
“Even with the power the idols give, Vitun Mies couldn’t escape death. Before he could continue expanding his growing empire, he died in his sleep of a supposed heart attack.”
Good.
“The question then became what to do with the idols. The eagle was buried with Vitun Mies, as he requested. The Donkey went to his older son, Vitun Pallot, and the Elephant went to his younger son, Vitun Ei. Both were reckless and irresponsible, and soon started to fighting each other, starting a civil war in the process.
“The civil war was so large and devastating that Vitun Mies’ tomb was lost to the sands of the desert, forever hiding the resting place of the the once great zebra king and his eagle, until you came along. The zebras who survived the war ultimately took the remaining idols and did what they wanted with them.
“But a prophecy foretold of a being that could rediscover these lost treasures, and wield their power to their full might. Vitun Mies didn’t even harness their full power and he conquered the entire region in a month. Surely the being who could truly use 100% of the idols power could take over an entire continent! Or more!”
“Who made up this prophecy?”
“It was not ‘made up.’ Zebras foretold it. They knew a being could restore their once great empire. Some zebras wanted that to happen. Others didn’t want more violence, so they tried to hide the idols. The statue you found was hidden in a temple in the middle of nowhere, correct? Behind many life threatening traps?”
“Yes, it was,” you say, wondering exactly how she knew that.
“You searched the temple only days before I. And with the lack of dead bodies, I expected two things: either Daring Do has it, or the prophecy is coming true. I primarily expected Fraulein Do. So I snatched up Fluage and told him to find her. Two weeks later, now we are here.”
Here you are.
“Unfortunately now I have the artifacts, but still have Fluage. I am grateful for where he has brought us, but he is no longer useful. In truth, he is very annoying. He talks about Fraulein Do too much. Even when I change the subject, it always comes back to that mare. If you talk to him for 10 minutes, you’ll want to kill him.
“Anyway, Kiduttaa was one of the zebras who wanted to restore their once great empire. I was not going to let him do that. How he got his dirty hooves on the donkey, I do not know, but that does not matter now.”
“Where was I before?” you ask, stopping the mare’s story.
“I-I’m sorry?”
“Before this whole prophecy thing. I’m not from around here, in case you couldn’t have guessed that.”
“Ja.”
“So where was I? Why can’t I remember anything about my life? All of my memories are only a couple weeks old.”
Her mouth forms an “o” shape as she looks calmly into your eyes. “Well, you weren’t anywhere.”
“What does that mean?” Her response doesn’t even make any sense.
“You’re memory is two weeks old because that’s how old you are. You’re two weeks old.”
...What?
“You don’t remember having an old life because you don’t have an old life. Your entire existence is built around the prophecy.”
...You’re even more confused now.
“You began to exist when the universe needed you to exist. That was two weeks ago. You’re technically two weeks old.”
She’s saying words, but they aren’t making any sense.
“Zebra voodoo magic is very powerful. The zebras said you would one day exist, and now you do. I really wish zebras didn’t exist; they’re magic is very powerful and too dangerous. But thankfully it created the idols we need. And it created you.”
Okay…
“Without it, you would never be here. I wouldn’t be here. Well, I would still exist, but would have no reason for being in this hell hole.”
The words she’s saying are starting to come together. However, there’s just something about everything she’s just said that’s… it’s…
Well, it’s fucking stupid. Isn't it?
You’re two weeks old? Part of some ancient prophecy? Some powerful warlock who has the powers of the universe to wield ancient zebra magic to conquer the world?
She didn’t phrase it exactly like that, but that’s how it’s coming across. And it’s dumb.
How are you supposed to respond to any of that? Like, seriously? What does she expect from you?
There just isn’t anything to say.
Aryanne takes your silence as a response in itself, as she stands and walks across the back of the carriage before sitting by your side, looking into your eyes.
“I’m so sorry,” Aryanne says, scooching up close by your side. “Th-This must be hard to believe,” she stutters, trying her best to speak English, which she has been doing very well so far. “But it is all true, just as the prophecy predicted. And now it is coming to frui-… fruition..”
She’s consoling you. She’s speaking softly and leaning against you a bit, as though wanting to make sure you’re all right.
It’s a nice sentiment and all, but you feel fine. Or, fine by your standards anyway. You don’t feel any different than you did an hour ago, so that’s ‘fine.’
Still, though, it’s nice to have her next to you. It’s relaxing, even. So hey, if she thinks you’re upset, you’ll pretend to be upset. Who cares?
This is the best you’ve been treated in… ever, potentially.
Wow. That’s a depressing thought. The best you’ve been treated is to be a prisoner, handcuffed in the back of some carriage in the middle of bum fuck nowhere.
“I cannot believe Ms. Do did not tell you what you were. I am sure she knew. I thought she told you. I thought you already knew.”
“She never mentioned it.”
“Shame on her! To have just… dragged you along the way she did… how disre-... disrespectful!”
You suppose it was.
Okay, but for serious, there’s no way any of what she said is true. You’ve gotten pretty tired of just believing everything any creature with 4 legs tells you. Believing everything just isn’t paying off. There just isn’t anyway that’s true. With all these different stories you’ve been told, someone’s gotta be lying. You’re starting to think all of them have been lying, and the truth is still out there somewhere.
You were just created by some magic? Yeah fucking right.
If that were the case, then why are you having a few old memories drift into your mind? You can remember movies. Movies with people in them. You can remember cities; not their names, but what one or two of them vaguely look like. And they didn’t look like any of this crap.
It’s not like you’re just having false memories, right? You don’t think so.
Of course, there isn’t anyway to prove you aren’t two weeks old unless your memories return. But there also isn’t anyway to prove that you are two weeks old.
Who knows?
No one, apparently.
Aryanne puts a hoof on your thigh, startling you a bit, and you look into her eyes to see what she’s trying to do, but she isn’t looking back into your eyes. Rather, she’s looking down at her own hoof, staring at the lower half of your body.
“I would never treat you that way,” she adds, still looking down. “Nopony in my country would treat you like that. You are too sp-... special, Jay.”
What?
Are you supposed to thank her? Or ask her why she’s touching you? You don’t feel like saying anything at all, so you don’t. What you do feel like doing is moving away, but you physically cannot do that either.
“Wir… ahem… We... will be spending much time together over the coming months. We will work almost exclusively with one another. S-So, I feel that, perhaps, we should…” She slides her hoof up your thigh a bit. “...g-get more comfortable with each other?”
Oh shit.
She looks up to you with her ears folded back, not moving her hoof from your upper thigh, completely red in the face, with a hopeful smile.
Her smile falters after just a couple seconds and she shyly looks to the floor.
“I-I-It’ll be very... important for us to have a strong relationship, I-I think. I wish to make you as comfortable and happy as possible.”
Then why are you tied up?
She looks up to you again, her cheeks still flushed. “I don’t mean for this to be awkward for you…”
It is.
“...B-But I have been searching for you for many years. To have actually found you now is overwhelming for me. I never thought this day would come, but here it is.”
She moves her hoof back down your thigh a bit, but doesn’t remove it. What is she going to do with it? The only thing she could do is hit you in the nuts, but it doesn’t sound like she’d do that after saying everything she’s been saying.
“I know you must be very confused. Most confused because Fraulein Do never told you what you are or who you will be, but I will explain things much better later in camp. I have answers to all of your questions.”
Of course she does. Everyone you meet seems to think they do.
“I would try to forget whatever Fraulein Do told you. She lies a lot, Fluage says. I believe him.”
You believe him too.
“This will be a good night,” she says with a smile. “We can all relax, have a drink. We will test the artifacts before we make the journey back home tomorrow. And we will give you a bath.”
You can’t help but smile at that. A good bath is something you could really use. If you have to smell yourself for too much longer, you’re gonna pass out and die.
Seeing you smile makes Aryanne beam and her eyes light up. “That is good, ja? I will make sure it’s good.”
She suddenly seems very excited, as she finally takes her hoof off of you and sits up as straight as she can, puffing her chest out to the point that her fur is grazing your arm. Her ears are standing at attention and her blue eyes are as big as they can be.
“Everypony here will make sure it’s good. I will make sure they do. And life will get a lot better when we get home. Er, when I get home... Well, i-it will also be your home, so yes, when we get home.” She chuckles nervously.
“And we’re going ‘home’ tomorrow?” you ask.
“J-Ja! Ahem. Ja. There’s a f-fishing town west of here, where we will sail back to the Fatherland. The Fuhrer will be so proud of me! And very glad to see you. Aha.”
You don’t even care. “What’s gonna happen to me?”
“H-Happen to you?”
“When I get to… wherever the hell you’re taking me.”
“Oh! Well, you’ll work for us - me! You will work for me. Ja... You will use the three artifacts we found, and in return… you… will have whatever you want, really.”
“I’ll have whatever I want?” That comment certainly intrigued you.
“Ja! Anything. Just do what you were created to do for us and we will give you anything you want for the rest of your life.”
That sounds like a really good deal.
No, forget that. That sounds like an amazing deal. A deal that’s too good to be true. If something is too good to be true, it is.
But why would she lie to you?
God damn, you were hoping you were done asking yourself that question.
“What would I have to do?” you ask.
“I will tell you everything later. Everything. I have already said so much. I do not wish to spoil the evening.”
You guess that’s all you’re going to get for now.
==========
At some point Aryanne and her red face stopped staring at you long enough to move away from you a bit. She didn’t move back to where she was sitting initially; she only moved a couple of feet further away.
But she’s gone back to staring at you. It’s not like before, though.
If you look over at her, she looks away, pretending she wasn’t looking at you. But you have peripheral vision.
She seems kinda… nervous. You wonder what she has to tell you.
==========
You never got a bath, but you did have a very nice shower.
And by ‘shower,’ you mean you stood under several buckets of water with holes in the bottom of them as you scrubbed yourself with soap.
It was amazing.
After seeing your dirty, bloody rags that were once your clothes, Aryanne refused to let you put them back on, and she burned them. She didn’t even throw them into a fire or anything, she just incinerated them with her horn magic.
Now you have no clothes. Literally none.
Aryanne said she would make you new clothes, but she never said how or out of what. So, for now, you’re just in a towel.
Fortunately you got the towel.
“How do you think the dress looks?” Fluage asks, spinning a wedding dress around himself.
Unfortunately, Fluage found his way into your tent. And the worst part about it is that you can’t leave. He’s got a white coat, black hair, and blue eyes. You hate him. You hate him, his face, and his stupid red beret.
You’re in a pretty large tent. Holding the tent up is a pole in the center, which you are handcuffed to. Who owns this tent, you don’t know. There is a bed / cot looking thing, a footlocker, a table with two cushions, and some boxes and shit. That’s about it.
And Fluage too.
You are sitting on a cushion, a towel wrapped around your waist, clean as a whistle, and handcuffed to a pole. Just another day in your life.
“Do you think Daring will like it? You’ve spent a lot of time with her, you should know. Is it her size? I had to guess the size, but she’s a pretty small girl. Very fit, though. Very fit. Curvy... I think it looks marvelous. Isn’t it marvelous?”
“Sure, yeah, looks great,” you respond, just wanting him to leave. What a creep. He’s been in here for like 15 minutes.
“Great? Just great? It has to look better than that. Once I find my love we will be married at once. I even brought the marriage certificate documents along with me; she’ll sign them right after seeing this dress, I’m sure of it.”
God damn, Daring may have told you a lot of lies, but this guy being a weirdo certainly wasn’t one of them. But she did forget to mention annoying as hell.
“I assure you, my love and I will be reunited by sundown! She’ll be back, she’ll be back. I know she’s around here. I can smell her. Then she will finally realize her love for me, and life can go on as it should.”
He begins to get a tear in his eye, and you feel like you need to vomit again. You’ve only been awake a few hours and this already the worst overall day you’ve ever had. It can’t get too much worse than this.
He stands on his hind legs and waltzes around the room, pretending to dance with the dress. After only a few seconds of that, he dips it down and gives it a deep kiss.
It’s a very passionate kiss. Very passionate. He’s even using tongue. He’s French kissing a dress right in front of you. And he isn’t stopping either, he’s still fucking going.
“You want me to leave you and the dress alone for a while?” you ask.
He chuckles, getting back down onto all of his legs. “No, no. When Daring is in the dress, I’m sure we’ll appreciate the privacy, but for now it’s fine.”
You hope he isn’t being serious. Mainly because you can’t actually give the creep any privacy. You’re handcuffed to the damn tent.
What the hell is wrong with everyone you meet? Is it natural to be a sociopath, a creep, a murderer, an arrogant asshole, or just batshit crazy in this part of the world?
“Ms. Do ages like a fine wine,” Fluage says, basically to himself. “As the years progress, her taste only enhances…”
What?
“However, she is starting to get up there in age, and if we are to start a family, it’s best to start as soon as possible. I want foals. A lot of foals. Ten, in fact. At least.”
You actually want to die. You want to kill yourself just to be away from this guy. Is he seriously saying this weird shit in front of you?
The thought of Fluage and Daring together is enough to make you gag. But once you remember how much you hate Daring, you can’t help but smile a bit.
“I hope you two have a long, long relationship,” you say.
“Aww thank you, thank you. It’ll be a very happy one, indeed.”
You didn’t say a ‘happy’ relationship.
“I didn’t know what kind of perfume my love prefers, so I brought as many as I could. Over 300 bottles, all different scents. She is sure to love at least one. The way to a mare’s heart is through her nose.”
“You bought 300 different perfumes?”
“No, no, no,” Fluage says with a laugh. “I brought 300 along with me. I have them in several trunks back in my tent. I bought over 1,000. The rest I left back at my house. See, what I did was I smelled every one that I bought, which took me several days to do properly, and used my powers of deduction to see which ones Daring Do would be sure to favor.”
“That’s normal. Can you go away now?”
“I personally smelled each one. The last time I was with my beloved I was sure to give her a few good whiffs, and based on how she smelled then is how I narrowed my selection down to 300.”
“Please shut up.”
“Very impressive, yes? I spent a small fortune on all the perfumes, and most of them will be thrown out after she chooses one. But it will be worth it.”
“Wait, this isn’t your tent?” you ask, genuinely wondering where you are. There are bags, a table, and a bed in here, so surely this tent belongs to someone.
“No, this is Aryanne’s tent.”
Then why is he in here with you, you wonder. Is he bored? Does he enjoy talking to you? You figured it was his tent as he’s been in here as long as you have.
“You can tell it’s hers by the lack of decor. She’s awfully plain. The lot of them are. No decor, no artwork, nothing.”
“Where’s she?” you ask, wanting to have other company.
“Here,” Aryanne announces, walking through the flaps of the tent. There is a soft light glowing around her horn as she holds a bucket in her magical grasp next to her. You can’t see what’s in the bucket yet, if there is anything inside, as you are sitting on the ground.
Despite your gaze being drawn to the woman’s horn because of the light emitting from it, you’re primarily focused on her beautiful face. Her pristine white coat seems to be gleaming even brighter than her horn, as do her big blue eyes and soft smile.
Her radiance is even more enhanced against the black background that is her military uniform. Your heart feels lifted just by looking upon this mare. Perhaps it’s because of her genuine beauty, perhaps it’s because you’re thankful someone else is here besides Fluage, as he is incredibly annoying. She looks even more alluring than she did earlier.
“I was just telling him about my upcoming wedding,” Fluage says, like he knows it’s definitely going to happen. “You are invited too, of course.”
Aryanne rolls her big blue eyes, not looking impressed. “Yes, thank you for the invitation. Again.” She places the bucket down on a table before moving a seat cushion over and placing it besides you.
Before she has the chance, Fluage sits upon the seat cushion, leaving him right next to you, something you didn’t want to happen. You don’t even like having him in the same tent as you, so for him to be rubbing against your side is unnerving at best.
He’s such a weirdo, but the worst part about it is that he thinks he’s completely normal. He talks about weird shit like it’s something normal people think and do.
“So…” he says with an odd smile, glancing between you and Aryanne. “What should we talk about?”
“Nichts!” Aryanne says, her face a little red. After a breath she continues. “I want to have a word alone with my guest.”
“Alone?” Fluage asks. “What am I supposed to do?”
“I don’t care, just wait in your tent until it’s time.”
“And how long will your ‘word’ with him take?”
Aryanne’s face glows an even deeper shade of red. “It’ll take as long as it takes. Out.” She points a hoof at the entrance of the tent.
“Fine, fine. I know when I’m not wanted.”
You don’t think he does.
“I could use a nap anyway. This dry heat is awful for my fur. Just fetch me when you’re done with your pet.”
He closes his eyes, holds his head high, and struts right out of the tent, leaving a seemingly pissed off Aryanne and a confused you behind.
He’s an interesting guy.
He told Aryanne to have fun with her ‘pet.’ You assume he was referring to you, cause what else could he have been referencing?
You’re so happy he’s finally gone. Just to be in a room without him is an amazing feeling. Who knew life could be so great after meeting and not being around a douche? You’d rather be in a room with the devil himself than Fluage.
Or, worse than that, being in a room with Daring.
Yep, that was a shot. Fuck her.
Seriously, though, he’s weird. He must’ve lectured to you about random shit for what felt like an hour before Aryanne just rescued you. You’re so happy you could kiss her.
Aryanne shakes her head as she walks over to the table, pulling a bottle of wine and two glasses out of the bucket she brought in with her.
As her back is turned towards you, you feel more comfortable with observing the mare who essentially owns you now. She hasn’t changed her clothes or anything since the last time you saw her, but she looks absolutely radiant now. And now you see the back of her.
She takes off her hat and sets it on the table, allowing you to see her mane cascade down her back.
She has a tail to match her mane, it’s short and blonde. Hers isn’t as short as a stallions, but it’s a lot shorter than Daring’s. You can also see the edges of her… what was it called? Beauty mark? Cutie mark? It was something like that. You see the corners of her pink whatever marking that she and every other pony has on their ass.
Who gives a shit. You don’t know why she has it and don’t want to ask. Daring had a long story about hers, so Aryanne probably does too, except Aryanne’s probably involves killing zebras or something weird. Even though it’s a heart.
You never asked Fluage about his, but you genuinely wonder what his signifies. It’s a smoking pipe. What does that mean? How did he get that? What does he even do for a living?
Aside from being annoying.
“Wine?” Aryanne asks, filling up both glasses and turning around, levitating them on either side of her. “Oh my! I can’t believe I forgot. I am very sorry.”
You feel the cuffs on your wrists that bind you to the pole in the center of the tent become loose and fall, freeing you.
“That’s better. I meant to do that, but Fluage made me forget. More comfortable now?”
“Ugh,” you begin, not sure what she’s trying to do. It’s probably another mind game. “Yeah, it’s better.” You rub at your wrists as you bring them into your lap.
“Gut!” She moves besides you and takes the open seat cushion, rubbing up against your side a little bit, perhaps feeling pretty comfortable with you. She levitates you the wine glass, which you take out of the air.
Now you’re wondering if she poisoned it. Would she do that? Why would she? Why wouldn’t she? You don’t know. It’s red wine, and if you were to poison a wine it’d be a red wine.
“Cheers!” she says with a big smile, clinking her glass against yours and taking a sip.
Meanwhile, you just stare at your own glass, wondering what the mystery liquid really is.
“You’re supposed to drink too. It’s a, uh, custom.”
“I know,” you point out. So she wants you to drink it, huh? Nice try, Aryanne, but you’re too smart to fall for this one. If you’re going to die, she’ll just have to blow up your head.
Huh. Maybe being poisoned wouldn’t be so bad.
The mare rolls her eyes. “It’s not poisoned, if that’s what you’re thinking. Is that what you’re thinking?”
Well… yes. But should you tell her what you’re thinking? You shouldn’t let her inside your head.
“Look…” She leans over and, while your glass is still in your hand, tilts your glass down with her lips until some of the liquid pours into her mouth. She swallows it all, licks her lips, and looks to you with a soft smile. “See? Not poisoned. Do not be afraid, Jay. Can I call you Jay? I don’t want anything bad to happen to you, like I said earlier. I need you alive and well, and that’s what I’ll make sure you are.”
Well, as touching as the sentiment is, you think it’s natural to still have some apprehensions.
“Do you not like wine? We can toast with something else, if you prefer.”
“N-No,” your voice cracks. “This is fine.” You take the smallest sip of anything you’ve ever had in your entire life, just barely allowing the red liquid to graze your lips.
It tastes all right, you think. It tastes like wine, anyways. Not like poison. Not that you’d know what poison tastes like.
“It’s not awful, yes?” Aryanne asks, leaning a bit more into you. “It’s Equestrian wine, so it’s not superb, but not awful. A good cheap wine.”
You suppose it’s okay. Why is she sitting so close to you?
You can smell the mare. You remember being this close with Daring on several occasions, and on all of those occasions, Daring smelled like sweat. Aryanne is the complete opposite, though.
Is she wearing perfume? Did she take a shower?
She smells like vanilla, and you enjoy it. You like that very much.
You don’t smell particularly good, yourself, having only bathed earlier with a generic bar of soap that doesn’t make you smell good, but essentially keeps you from smelling awful. So smelling yourself isn’t great, but it’s something that always happens.
Smelling something this pleasant though is more than lovely. It’s wonderful! Normally you’d be relatively uncomfortable with her being so close, but hey, she uncuffed you, gave you a drink, got rid of Fluage, smells nice… This mare can do whatever she wants with you.
“Do you like my mane, Jay?” she asks, straightening it with a hoof and a flick of her head. “I tried to w-work on it before I came over. Wearing a hat all day isn’t very good for it.”
“It looks great,” you say, just feeling honest. You try to be honest. But now you’re a little annoyed that she now knows you as ‘Jay.’ You’ve gotten used to the name and everything at this point, it just isn’t yours. Probably. “And you smell nice too.”
That comment sounded less weird in your head.
“Aww, yes? You’re so sweet. It’s a perfume. I took it from Fluage, but he hasn’t seemed to notice yet. He has many. I am very glad you enjoy it. I like it too. I will keep it.”
“You just stole it from him?”
“Sure! You should see his trunk. He has, like, 100 of them. He won’t miss one or two. He must love perfume. I saw him putting some on earlier.”
She sips at her glass, draining the rest of her wine, before she levitates the bottle over and refills her drink. She motions if you want anymore, but you shake your head, as you have barely touched yours.
“And if he has a problem with me, I’ll just throw him out of camp; I have been looking for an excuse. He’s been here too long. I wish he would go home, but he thinks Daring Do will return again, for some reason. At this point I wish she would, just so Fluage will leave. But I know she won’t.”
“Glad to know we’re on the same page then.”
She chuckles. “He is annoying, ja? Sorry he was in here for so long, I did not think he would come in here to speak with you. What did you two talk about?”
“I really don’t even know,” you laugh. Being in your situation, practically naked and in a potentially dangerous environment, you were feeling pretty anxious. But making fun of Fluage is really calming your nerves. Aryanne’s pretty cool, you think. “He kept talking about Daring, but I never asked him a question or anything.”
“Oh, that’s all he can talk about. I have tried speaking with him about other things but the conversation comes back to Daring Do. Every... single... time... I saw he invited you to his wedding.”
“Yeah, he did. I’m really excited for it too, I’m glad I got an invitation.”
“Are you really? I don’t think it will actually happen.”
“I was just joking.”
“Oh. That is funny!” She chuckles, leaning into you a bit and sipping her wine. “Aha… Ahem… Y-You know, it’s very hot in the desert. And hot i-in here. Would you mind if I take off… take off my jacket?”
Well she doesn’t need your permission to do that. “Sure.”
With a big smile, she stands, hastily removes her jacket, folds it and throws it on the table, quickly returning to your side.
“Thank you,” she beams, touching your side again. Should you move away?
You don’t think so. She clearly wants to be touching you, otherwise she wouldn’t be doing it so much without you provoking her.
And now she’s completely naked. It’s a weird thought now, considering most ponies are naked anyways, but her being naked is a little… odd.
You’ve only seen her wearing clothes up until this point. Now she’s not wearing a thing, and it just feels like… she’s showing herself off. She’s rubbing up against you, sitting up real straight with her chest out, practically demanding that you look at her, which you are.
Her fur is pure white. Completely spotless. She smells nice and her fur is soft… you’re actually pretty happy with the situation you’re in right now, even if you’re not entirely comfortable.
You can’t stop thinking about Daring. She’s in the back of your mind, but she keeps working her way to the front. She used to wear clothes too, but the first time you saw her without them she freaked out. She got all embarrassed and yelled at you… as she always did.
But Aryanne wants you to see her like this. It’s just something for you to think about.
“Comfortable?” you ask, seeing how big her smile is now that she got to take her jacket off.
“Very comfor-... comfor-table!” She looks so excited.
“You know, you speak my language really well.”
“Thank you! Equestrian is a great language. It is most difficult to learn, but most fun to speak.”
It’s weird to you that she called your language “Equestrian.” It’s English. At least that’s what you think it is. Right? Or are you making that up? Whatever.
What really matters, as you try to keep conversation going, is why is it that she came in here in the first place. She came in with wine and exactly two glasses, got rid of Fluage so you could have privacy, uncuffed you, chatted you up, took off her clothes, has been very friendly…
But why?
You genuinely aren’t sure. Part of you wishes she’d just smack you around a bit like everyone else has. At least then you’d know exactly who she was and what she was about. You’re so done with these mind games.
“Y-You know,” she begins. “The only things I know about you are what the prophecy foretold and Fraulein Do told me before I met you. Can you tell me about… about yourself?”
“Well, sure,” you clear your throat. “But I am only two weeks old, so not much has happened to me.”
“Tell me about your a-a-adventures with Fraulein Do. That is, if you want to share. We can talk about something else, if you prefer.”
“No, that’s fine. I woke up in a forest a couple weeks ago. I guess that’s where it all started.”
Aryanne smiles at you and nods.
“Daring came across me after just a few minutes, really. It happened pretty quickly.”
“Interesting.”
“She just walked right by me. I followed her to this… tomb. I went inside, found her, and we made a deal that I’d help her find these things if she got me back home.”
“She said she’d take you back home?” Aryanne asks, incredulously.
“That’s what she said.”
“I cannot believe it. She lied to you right from the start.”
“Seems that way.”
“How… How… unbelievable! It is most disrespectful.”
“After that Kiduttaa and his friends found us, beat us up, interrogated me, and Kiduttaa...”
“You don’t mean…” Aryanne moves in front of you a bit.
“He…” How do you phrase this? “I didn’t tell him where we hid the elephant of whatever the fuck, so he cut me up with a hook.” Yeah, that’s the best way to phrase it.
Aryanne just looks at you in shock, her eyes getting smaller.
“I am so sorry. I did not want you to rethink these terrible memories.” A deep scowl comes over her face, her blue eyes get very small, her face turns red, and the whole room darkens. “If I had known that dirty zebra had done that I would’ve… I would’ve…!”
She takes a few deep breaths, calming herself and the room lightens back up again.
“He is a lucky zebra, is all I will say. He should’ve gotten it worse. But! But, let us not speak anymore of this. You have a troubled past; it is young and dark. I said I would make this evening a good one, and I will. So let’s talk about something else now.”
“We can talk about you, if you want,” you say, immediately regretting it. You didn’t want to know anything about this mare earlier, and you still shouldn’t. Her past definitely wasn’t a happy and bright one if she killed a zebra and his friends this morning without blinking.
But you feel drawn to this mare. She’s very polite, treats you with relative respect, and is the nicest overall being you think you’ve ever met. But that isn’t saying much. No one you ever met could really be described as “nice.”
Or even “normal.” But that just makes life more exciting.
“Oh, there is not much to know about me,” she says sheepishly. “Esp-... Especially these past few years. I have been looking for you most of the time.”
“Yeah… why is that exactly? What exactly do you need me for?”
“You have not barely touched your wine! Are you not thirsty, Jay?”
“Well, not really, no. I’m honestly just wondering-”
“Y-You do not have to drin-… drink it, if you do not wish to.”
“The wine’s fine, I don’t want any wine.”
“D-D-You-”
“Aryanne, what do you need me for? And how did you know where the eagle was buried?”
“Jay-”
“I just want answers.”
“And you will get them! Just not now, please, please.” She levitates her wine glass in front of you, looking pretty nervous. “Please drink some, Jay. You are very nervous, and I know why. This will relax your nerves and clear your m-mind.”
You grab her glass, not feeling nervous at all. Only person looking nervous around here is her.
“And it’s not poisoned.”
You’re even starting to believe her. You take a sip of the wine, and it’s actually pretty good. And alcohol is supposed to relax you after all. Maybe just one more sip…
That sip turns into several gulps and the wine is gone. What a day.
“See?” Aryanne asks. “Not poisoned. Still good. Very relaxing.” She levitates the bottle back over and refills the glass in your hands.
“I just want us to relax,” Aryanne continues. “It’s been a long day for you; very stressful. And I have had a long day, too, you know. So I just want to put our minds at ease tonight. I think I have earned it after finally finishing my search for you after all these years.”
“So no questions,” you observe.
“Just for now. Later, absolutely yes, but just not right now. Now we shall relax. I want to sleep well tonight and just feel relaxed.”
Daring used to tell you to relax too. She used to tell you that all the time. She told you to relax so much, in fact, that you lost your god damn mind and choked the shit out of her.
If you tried to do that to Aryanne, she’d destroy you, no doubt about it.
“Fine,” you say, simply agreeing with the mare.
“Good! Very good. I am happy. This will be a fun evening now. Just the two of us.”
She takes one long swig from her wine glass, draining the rest of the contents in one gulp, which was pretty impressive.
“Ah!” She places the glass in front of herself before shifting and turning fully towards you. “Y-You’re a very handsome man, Jay. Do you know this?” She reaches over a puts a hoof gently on your chest, startling you a bit, but you don’t move.
Is she hitting on you? Why did the conversation suddenly take this kind of turn?
She can’t be drunk, right? She only had a couple, and she only just finished them. Did she drink before she came over here? What is going on?
Your heart rate increases as she slides her hoof a little lower down your chest, biting her bottom lip a bit.
“You’re very handsome. Strong, too. Mentally and physically. I don’t know anypony who could’ve lasted out here as you have. Ah… You’re even more impressive than I thought you’d be.”
“Uh- ahem…” you clear your throat, now just watching Aryanne touch your chest. You still have your wine in your hand too. Should you drink it? Or put it down? What is she going to do to you? “Thank you.”
You’re too afraid to move. If she advances on you, what should you do? Would she make those kind of advances on you? Maybe not. Maybe you’re just reading too far into things. Maybe they’re just really friendly where she comes from.
“You know,” she says quietly, “if one were to think about it, we would be the perfect match.”
“Perfect match?”
“Ja, ja. With your… natural strength and special gifts, paired with my intellect… there would be no stopping us.”
Stopping you from what?
“Genetically speaking too. Our genetics… mixed… would create nothing short of perfection.”
Is she saying what you think she’s saying?
“And I’d always appreciate you. I’d be able to give you anything your heart desires. Th-That is… if you can give me what I want.”
“W-Well… What do you want?”
She giggles, leaning in closer to you. “Let me show you.”
Your confused response is cut off by her lips interlocking with yours, taking you completely by surprise.
But that only lasts for a second before you throw yourself backwards, landing flat on your back. You scoot yourself a little further away from the mare, who is still sitting upon her cushion, looking at you with a puzzled, upset expression.
“Are you okay?” she asks. “Are you having a stroke?”
“Why’d you do that?” you ask, sitting up a bit but still lying mostly on your back. She’s looking at you like she didn’t just try making out with you a couple seconds ago.
“Do what?”
“Kiss me. I wasn’t expecting that.”
“Oh! I am sorry, I should have told you.” She stands from her seat cushion and begins moving towards you. Not knowing what to do, you elect to do nothing, and just remain on your back and watch the mare. She could do anything.
Should you be nervous? You feel a little nervous. You don’t even know what you don’t know.
Without provocation, Aryanne’s walking stops as she stands above you. She places her forelegs on either side of your head and looks down at you.
Suddenly, and you should have expected, her head darts towards yours, and your lips meet once again.
You put your hands on her chest and push her away, separating your lips, as your brain starts picking up on what is happening, leaving Aryanne red in the face and very upset.
“Please stop doing that,” she commands with your hands on her chest.
“What are you trying to do?!” you ask, still lying underneath the mare, looking up at her.
She quirks an eyebrow at you. “I’m trying to kiss you, yes?”
“No!”
“No?”
“No.”
“Why not, Jay?”
“Why?... B-Because…”
Yeah, why can’t she kiss you? Is that some kind of a problem? You can’t reasonably see how it could be. She did earlier, and you didn’t even react.
“We kissed this morning. Are you not enjoying it?” she asks.
“W-Well, I mean…” You really were enjoying yourself, to be honest. “No. I wasn’t.”
“I can tell when someone lies to me, Jay. Now look me in the eye and say it again.”
“I mean… I mean… Why?”
“Why what?”
“Why are you kissing me, Aryanne?”
“D-Did I not explain this? I said we would have a fun, relaxing evening alone together.”
“A-And this is what you meant?”
“Ja! I thought I made you to understand. I showered and made myself smell nice, brought you wine, and undressed before you, which I read most stallions enjoyed. I believed you understood my hints. You even said you liked my mane.”
Wow. “Sure, but that doesn’t mean I want to kiss you.”
“Oooh…” Her face turns a deep shade of red, her ears fold back, and her big blue eyes shrink in size. “Oh... I-I-I’ll just…” She turns so that she is no longer standing overtop of you. “I am so sorry. I have made this v-very awkward for you, I-I am sorry.”
What the hell is wrong with you? Seriously? This girl was on top of you, kissing you, and you throw her off? Is there something wrong in your brain?
She’s been really nice since you’ve met, and that really counts for something to you. She hasn’t threatened you, mocked you, struck you… That’s more than you’ve gotten from anyone else you’ve met.
Fuck. A headache is coming on.
How is it that you turned down the opportunity to make out with this girl? Who in their right mind could do such a thing?
There’s no denying that she’s attractive. There. You said it (or thought it). She’s gorgeous. She’s the prettiest girl you’ve seen in your entire two week existence.
Her beautiful blonde mane and tail, her pristine white coat, and large ass tattoo that constantly draws your gaze to her backside… What the hell is wrong with you?
You feel bad that you made Aryanne feel bad. Now you feel like you owe her something... And you think you know what that something is.
“I-I am so sorry,” Aryanne stutters, backing her way towards the exit of the tent, picking up her jacket and holding it in front of her chest with her head hung low. “I hope I did not offend you. I-I will leave you now, I am very-”
“Aryanne wait!” you catch yourself saying, stopping her dead in her tracks.
Are you really going to go through with this? Are you thinking clearly? Maybe you should let her leave and gather your thoughts. Maybe you need to clear your head for a while. Maybe you should think a little more before making a decision like this.
…
No. You’re going through with this.
“Aryanne, come here, please,” you request, your heartbeat starting to increase.
With her head hung low, she slowly marches back to where you’re sitting. You decide to stand and walk over to the one bed occupying the tent and take a seat, patting the space next to you for Aryanne to sit.
You genuinely feel bad for making the mare look so down. She’s been pretty chipper all day, so seeing her like this is odd, and it makes you feel odd.
Aryanne hops up onto the bed, taking a seat by your side, but she’s not right by your side like she was earlier. She’s leaving a bit of distance between you and her.
“I need to ask you something,” you say to the embarrassed mare. “But I need you to look at me.”
Your companion begins to look in your direction before deciding against it and reverting her gaze back to her hooves.
“Look at me.”
After a few seconds of shifting herself, she looks up, her blue orbs gazing into yours.
“Why are you here?” you ask.
“Existentially?” she responds.
“Why are you here, in my tent? What do you want with me?”
“I meant everything I said, Jay. I want to make you happy. Everypony should.”
“Why?”
“Because you’re special. I-I have told you this, yes? You are a very important m-man to me.”
“Why do-?”
“Jay…” she interrupts. “I am sorry for what I have done and do not expect forgiveness. I-I just want to make sure you are happy. I thought this would help make you happy and you would enjoy it. I understood that you have had… bad times la-lately, and I wanted to change that.”
“But why do you want to change that?”
“Because you’re special. I just said that. Why so many questions? Why do you think I shouldn’t treat you well?”
That’s a phenomenal question. Ever since you met Aryanne, you’ve been waiting for her to beat you up or something. Only problem is, she hasn’t.
In your mind, that is a problem. She isn’t supposed to be kind to you. She isn’t supposed to be trying to make you happy.
But she is. And instead of accepting that and being grateful for it, you’re paranoid and won’t stop asking questions.
“You don’t know, do you?” Aryanne points out. “Y-You’re an important man, Jay. A lot of ponies think so. I-I think so.”
The white mare extends a hoof and lays it gently on your thigh, looking hopefully up at you.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever said to you, you think. How can she mean any of what she just said? She doesn’t sound like she’s lying.
“I-I am really sorry, Jay,” she whispers. “Please do not be upset with me. My intentions were good.”
“I’m not upset, Aryanne,” you say, surprising her.
“No?”
“No. I’m not upset. You just surprised me. I didn’t expect that. I didn’t expect you to say… anything you’ve said to me.”
“I-I meant everything too!” she adds quickly. “Every… word.”
“I’m sorry for reacting how I did.”
“Jay, you do not need to apo-”
“Let me finish,” you interrupt. “I don’t mean to be untrusting. I’m just naturally cautious, I guess, but I know you want to make me happy. I-I appreciate that… Uh…”
You don’t know what to say. You want to make Aryanne interested in you again after you effectively killed the mood, but you’ve never been in a situation like this before. What can you say?
Should you be honest? Should you just say what you feel? That’d be the easiest solution, but it might not be the most effective. You’ve gotta try something.
You begin after a deep breath. “Look, Aryanne, I don’t… I don’t want you to leave.”
“J-Ja?” she asks, looking hopefully up at you.
“I want you to stay with me,” you say, feeling a deep burning in your cheeks. It sounds embarrassing to say it out loud.
“I-I will stay! Ahem… I will stay, i-if that is what you wish.”
Good! You feel relieved that she’s looking happier again. But what can you do now? You need to get Aryanne back into you somehow.
In what you think is a solid first move, you reach a hand over and brush her mane out of her eyes, bringing a smile back to Aryanne’s face. You feel great just looking at this beautiful woman smile.
You move your hand and cup her soft white cheek, causing her to laugh and nuzzle into your appendage. She coos contentedly as you stroke her cheek with your thumb.
“For what it’s worth,” you begin. “You’re important to me too.”
You’re not sure if you actually mean that, but it seems like a good thing to say in this situation.
She smiles at you, cheeks red, showing all of her teeth. You wrap a hand around her side, scooting towards her.
Moving in a bit closer, you can see her chest move up and down faster and faster as her breathing picks up. Her hot breath washes over your face with every exhale she makes. Your eyes never leave hers, as hers continue to eagerly glance between your eyes and your lips, wondering what you’re going to do next.
Bringing your face in even closer, you close the gap completely and kiss her snout, if only to tease her a bit. She laughs as you do it again.
As fun as beating around the bush is, you’re too aroused to continue, and want to get down to business.
Your lips connect with hers and she immediately pushes back, allowing her eyes to slide closed, but you keep yours open, still not sure how to feel about what’s happening.
Aryanne’s soft lips move enthusiastically back and forth, giving you many kisses in just a few moments.
She moves forward, pushing your head back and swinging a hind leg over your legs, taking a seat on your lap. You can feel her hips grinding against your growing erection, exciting you more. You place both hands on her respective hips, which are pretty thick for a small girl like her. You squeeze her soft rump and embrace her closer, forcing her body into yours.
She pulls back, but just for a second to get some air, before her lips interlock with yours once again. Her moves her hips steadily back and forth, grinding against your lap, making her moan into your mouth, her hot breath washing over your face.
At this point, you can feel the excitement building as the blood really starts flowing, despite your remaining confusion. Rather than overthink this situation, or think about it at all, you’ve just decided to dive into it.
Even though you don’t have any experience with this kind of thing, you can easily tell Aryanne doesn’t either. If your kissing method is basic, hers is sloppy, but it’s the effort that counts, and she’s nothing short of enthusiastic.
You push your head forward, forcing her back a little bit, just to show that you’re the one in control here. You part her lips with your tongue, invading her mouth and forcing her tongue into a dance with yours.
“Mmh!” Aryanne coos with a heavy breath, pulling back a little. “Ja. See? I knew you would enjoy this.”
With a smile, she moves back in, forcing your head back as her tongue enters your mouth, eagerly exploring. You stroke her hair before putting a hand on the back of her head, keeping her right where you want her.
As much fun as kissing her lips is, she has a full body that is just waiting for your attention, and it’d be awfully rude to ignore any of those equally important areas.
You move away from her lips, leaving Aryanne flustered and nervous with anticipation. The most sacred part of this woman is far below her face, so you’ll need to work your way down.
Your lips graze and caress her cheeks. She moves her head to the side, exposing her neck, and allowing you to free access to her.
Wanting to spice things up a bit, you forget your lips and decide to use your teeth, which you use to graze over her soft white fur and nibble on her bare skin.
Aryanne sighs in content as you bite at her, encouraging you to go deeper and harder. You can feel yourself becoming very aroused from underneath the towel you’re wearing, and you can’t wait to take it off. You put a hand behind her back, forcing her closer to you so that your chests leave no space between them. You move the other hand up and down her side, spending a bit more time feeling the soft flesh on her ass.
“Wait, wait!” Aryanne says, putting her forelegs on your chest and pushing you away a bit.
“What is it? Did I hurt you?”
“N-No,” she stutters, her face red. “This is about you, not me. So… lean back, Jay, and let me take care of you.”
Well, if she insists. You’re not complaining. You obey the mare’s demands, relaxing your body and allowing this woman to do what she wants with you.
Aryanne hops down and puts her butt on the ground, taking a seat in front of you, electing to skip any foreplay and getting right to it, apparently.
“Stallions like it with the mouth, yes?” she asks.
You’d say yes if you could, but you just can’t get the words out. Aryanne, not waiting for a reply anyway, takes the knot of the towel in between her teeth. She looks up at you with her big red eyes and a sultry smile as she slowly starts to tug at the cloth, loosening it.
Wait a second… Her eyes aren’t red; they’re blue. Yeah, they’re blue...
Anyway, just a few moments later, the towel is off and you are exposed, erection in full view and at eye level of your unicorn companion.
You take the loose towel and toss it off to the side, not needing it anymore.
Aryanne looks at your erection with big eyes and a red face while clearing her throat. “I-It’s a bit… bigger... than I anticipated.”
That brings a smile to your face. Nothing boosts a man’s self esteem like a comment like that.
“Okay,” she whispers, magically putting her hair in a ponytail. “I can do this. Here goes.”
She sticks her tongue out and brings her head forward until her soft, wet tongue makes contact with the base of your shaft.
Just that action in itself makes you twitch, and you try to get yourself under control. If that touch was enough to make you feel like that, then you need to really keep your composure.
After tracing your erection from its base to the tip, she pulls back, exhales deeply, and you feel her warm breath blow across your shaft.
“Ready, Jay?” she asks, but doesn’t wait for a proper response as she takes the tip of your erection between her lips. You feel her tongue flick over the most sensitive region of your erection before she slowly moves down.
You involuntarily flex, wanting to get more of yourself inside her.
She starts slow, making shallow moments until her throat warms up. She takes your shaft a few inches before going back to the tip. She goes down a little further before coming back up again. She tries to take you all the way down...
“Glch!” Aryanne gags, coming up for a moment to recompose, leaving you wanting more. She takes a deep breath, and before you can ask if she’s all right, she goes back down again.
“Shit,” you whisper, trying to control yourself. The only thing you can think of doing is to grip the side of the bed as hard as you can, putting all your mental effort into not finishing, while still enjoying yourself. It’s a difficult balance.
You can only watch as her head bobs up and down. She doesn’t seem especially experienced, but she does know the basic motion and has an idea as to what she’s doing, so that counts for something. Even just that much is driving you crazy.
You feel your manhood twitch in the back of her mouth, causing you to jolt forward a bit in an attempt to control yourself.
“Am I doing good?” Aryanne asks, a strand of saliva still stuck between her lips and you.
“Really good,” you breathe. “K-Keep going.”
With a deep breath and a look of determination, she takes your manhood back in her mouth. You feel her teeth gently graze over your skin while her tongue swirls around, making you sigh in content. Aryanne looks up at you with her big blue eyes and a partial smile as she gradually begins to pick up the pace.
Aryanne’s horn begins glowing its blue hue, and at the same time, a soft, featherlike touch is felt as something gently squeezes and tugs at your balls.
Her tempo increases, and you can feel yourself already close to the brink. You watch as her head bobs up and down on you, but not able to make it all the way down. The warm, moist cavity that is Aryanne’s mouth is making you feel a way you’ve never felt before. You wish something like this would’ve happened to you sooner.
Between the warm feeling of Aryanne’s mouth, and the cool air you feel when her mouth leaves you, you know this isn’t going to last very long.
Your breathing increases as beads of sweat begin forming on your forehead.
You put a hand on the back of her head, not sure what you’re doing exactly, but you definitely want her to go all the way down. It’s driving you crazy.
As she goes back up, she takes a moment to swirl her tongue around the tip of your shaft.
That, with the combination of her groping, is pushing you over the edge. As she goes down and back up, you can’t hold yourself back any longer.
A hot, white stream shoots out of your shaft, leaving a long trail from the tip of Aryanne’s unexpecting snout to her hair. Her eyes widen as she takes your shaft back into her mouth, and you feel yourself shoot your seed into the back of her waiting throat, shrinking her eyes to the size of grains of rice.
“Mmmh!” she moans, sending vibrations through your body.
On instinct, you grab the back of Aryanne’s head and force her all the way down, gagging her, but the feeling sends you into pure ecstasy. Your vision goes completely white for a second as you feel like you’re on the verge of passing out.
She pushes back on you, trying to get free, but your grip on her doesn’t lighten at all. You especially don’t want to let go as you feel her throat tighten around your shaft.
As you twitch a final few times, feeling completely spent, your grip on the mare loosens and you slouch back, breathing heavily, feeling more relaxed than you have in your entire life.
“That was fast,” Aryanne observes, licking her lips to clean them, turning your face red in embarrassment. She picks up your towel and wipes her face off.
“Sorry…” You don’t know what else to say. “That’s never happened to me before.”
This whole scenario is just embarrassing. You didn’t even know this is what she wanted to do with you, and once you found out, you got to the finish way before you meant to. This was definitely supposed to last longer, but you couldn’t hold out. How could something feel that good?
“It’s okay, Jay!” the mare squeaks excitedly, giving you manhood one final lick. “You taste very good. I know that when stallions haven’t had a release in a long time, they don’t last very long. Has it been a long time since you had a release?”
You don’t even know. “I suppose so.”
She smiles. “Then you will last much longer our next time. ”
She stands from her place on the floor, puts her forelegs on your shoulders and moves her hind legs around your waist so that she is properly straddling your lap. You can feel the woman’s excitement as it runs down and drips from your thighs.
“We can take a rest and go again,” she suggests. “And again after that, if you wish. This night is about you.”
She gives you a quick peck on the tip of your nose.
“And I will make sure it is all about you.”
“Well…” you begin sheepishly. You honestly cannot see a downside to this. This beautiful woman wants to please you? Well, do your worst! “Okay.”
“Good boy. Now,” she levitates over the bottle of wine, taking a swig right out of it. “Let’s have a bit more to drink, and get back to work.”
She’s been nothing but pleasant to you, even if she does give off this weird vibe. There’s just something about her you can’t put your finger on.
Sure, she murdered a zebra right in front of you, and that was weird, but that’s not really what you mean… She’s just… different. You don’t know. There’s just something about this pony that’s troubling you.
However, that may be nothing, as you do get troubled pretty easily and pretty often, so maybe the thoughts are just a bad side-effect of hanging out with Daring.
God damn. You still can’t believe she left you.
It happened just this morning, but you still can’t stop thinking about it. All this time you’ve been spending with Aryanne physically, but mentally, you can’t stop thinking about your old partner.
You were thinking about her 30 seconds after she flew out of your life.
You were thinking about her when you went for a drive with Aryanne and her unicorn gang.
You were thinking about her when Fluage invited you to his and her wedding at an unset date in the future.
You were thinking about her when Aryanne started touching you.
You were thinking about her when Aryanne went down on you.
And still now, you’re even thinking about her while you have your arms wrapped tightly around Aryanne’s slim waist with your face buried in her ass. It just doesn’t make any sense.
It’s like there’s some deeper part of you that can’t let go of that gray maned mare.
“D-Do you wish to stop now, Mr. Jay?” Aryanne asks, panting heavily, noticing how you’ve paused and are now lost in thought.
“Hmm? Oh! Sorry.”
“Mmmph! Oh, goodness! You are very skilled, Mr. Jay!”
Aryanne is a lot of fun, but you gotta be honest, you’d rather be with Daring right now. And you don’t even know why. She abused and abandoned you, and all you want to do is see her again.
You know that logic makes absolutely no sense, but nevertheless, it’s how you feel. There’s just something about this situation that’s… not right… You feel as if you’re missing something… You feel like you should be somewhere else… You feel like you shouldn’t be with Aryanne...
Eh, whatever. You need to just relax for a bit. You’ve had some wine, had your dick sucked, now you’re eating this chick out. Life is good if you let it, so relax and enjoy yourself for a while.
With that thought, you try to get into what you’re doing. You stop for a moment to look at Aryanne’s plump backside, seeing the mixture of saliva and her own fluids trickle down her womanhood and hind legs, matting down her fur.
The air off her rump is hotter than the air outside your tent, and it’s enough to make you sweat and want to dive in.
“Is everything all correct, Mr. Jay?” Aryanne pants, noticing how you’ve stopped again.
You grab a couple handfuls of her big butt, squeezing her plump flesh and spreading her cheeks, further exposing the helpless mare. You take a moment to admire the mare’s tight ass, wanting to have some fun with it.
Your grip on the mare’s bottom tightens for a moment as you move your thumbs to either side of her moistened slit, massaging the tender area, making Aryanne squeak a little. With a small tug, you pull her lips apart a bit, exposing her soft, pink inside.
In a fit of desire, your tongue and lips set to work, licking and kissing everything the mare has to offer. You stick your tongue inside, penetrating her walls and tasting her sweet juices run down your chin.
You take her swollen button into your mouth, gently tugging on it and rolling it around with your tongue, hearing Aryanne’s soft moans of pleasure.
You pull away from the mare’s rump, thin strands of saliva and her arousal connecting her aching marehood and your glistening lips.
We can move if you want,” you suggest, licking your lips clean of her sticky fluids.
“O-Onto the bed?” Aryanne suggests, smiling and turning back to look at you a bit.
You wouldn’t exactly call it a bed; it’s closer to a cot. But it has to be more comfortable and less messy than lying in the sand, so you’re going for it.
Without waiting for a response from your new partner, you rise to your feet and grab Aryanne tightly around her midsection. She gives a surprised yelp as you lift her off the ground and plop her onto the bed, quickly positioning yourself behind her.
She meekly attempts to stand up straight but you are quick to join her on the bed and force her chest into the mattress with your hands, pressing your groin against her backside and grinding your excited manhood against her rump.
“I like the… directness,” Aryanne remarks, glancing up at you from her lowly position. “I admit… I am… nervous.”
“It’ll be okay,” you smile, thinking you’re telling the truth. For all you know you’re a two week old demigod that has never had sex.
For all you know, you’re a 65 year old lesbian who’s had sex with everyone in the world. You don’t know anything, so you’re just guessing here and hoping to be right.
“Ready?” you ask a panting, red-faced Aryanne, her face on her hooves with her ass in the air. You rub the tip of your manhood along her lips, teasing her with what you’re about to do.
“Ja…” she swallows hard. “Ready when you are…”
With that, you move away from her a bit in order to line yourself up while standing on your knees behind her and grab onto her cutie marks, holding her in place. You slowly inch forward to ease yourself in...
Only problem is, you don’t exactly fit.
She’s a bit tinier than you initially realized and she’s a hell of a lot tighter, too. Your dick slides along her slippery marehood as you struggle to get it in, sliding up between her butt cheeks.
Aryanne giggles as she notices your struggling, turning your face red. In an attempt to stop embarrassing yourself, you try even harder to get it in.
Tragically, the harder you try the easier it’s becoming to fuck up. Your embarrassment and Aryanne’s amusement really isn’t helping the situation any.
“Here, hold still,” you say, flustered, grabbing Aryanne’s respective flanks a bit tighter to hold her steady.
“Need some help?” she laughs. “If you like, Herr Jay, I can- Eep!”
You finally manage to pop the head of your shaft inside Aryanne, after much trouble. It makes you happy that Aryanne’s laughing at your efforts has now ceased as she has now tensed up, squeezing her eyes shut and tightening around you.
“You okay down there?” you ask with a smile, seeing Aryanne in this pathetic state. Considering she was just laughing at you, you think this is the best revenge you can give. You give Aryanne’s flanks a good squeeze, easing an inch or two more inside her.
Her only response is a meek nod, gritting her teeth with her eyes still closed.
“Seriously, are you all right?” you ask, now a bit worried as she doesn’t seem to be even remotely comfortable.
“I am… Mmph!... S-Sehr komfartable…”
“No you aren’t.”
“I am!”
“Aryanne, I’m like halfway in, at most, and you look like you’re about to fall apart.”
“Not to worry a-about me, Herr Jay,” she struggles through a few heavy breaths. "What a strange sensation," she whispers to herself.
“Okay, we’ll stop.” You withdraw from Aryanne’s rump and take a seat on the bed.
“N-No, no!” Aryanne begs, turning around to face you. “I am okay, I am not in pain.”
“Yes you are. It’s fine, Aryanne, we can do something else.”
“I do not wish to do something else!” She places her hooves on the other side of your lap, getting her face right underneath yours. “I-I am okay, Herr Jay, see?” she smiles painfully. “You are still aroused, I see, and I wish… to… to help with that.”
“That’s very sweet Aryanne, but you’re not enjoying it. Stop worrying about me so much, you’re going to hurt yourself.”
“I just need to get used to the feeling of you inside me. That’s it. W-We may take it slow, ja?”
Aryanne gets off of you and back into the same position she was just in a few moments ago. She lowers her head to rest on her forehooves while keeping her ass high in the air, swishing her tail back and forth, briefly offering you a glimpse of her aching womanhood.
Your sober mind would have some apprehensions, but you’re aroused, and most of your thinking is happening with your dick.
Aryanne flips her tail up and out of the way, exposing her backside once again. Her swollen, dripping marehood practically begging you to take the her for a ride, and there isn’t anything else you’d rather be doing.
“I-It will be better if y-you put it… all the way inside. So I could get used to the… uhm… the uhm… sensation.”
“Are you sure?” you ask after a moment. “I mean, are you really, really sure?” She doesn’t seem so confident about all this, and you’re not going to force her into anything. She was the one who started all this, so she can stop anytime. You seriously don’t want to hurt her or anything.
But at the same time, you’re pretty aroused right now and want her to let you fuck her brains out. Getting blue balled now would just add to the shittiness of your short life.
“I am s-sure, yes,” Aryanne manages, glancing up at you. “It is my wish to… to please you, and I will do so!”
“Yeah, that’s great and all, but it looked like you were in a lot of pain.”
“Pain is weakness leaving the body. Now, go ahead, Jay! You will mount me now.”
She shakes her rump back and forth, showing off that she’s supposedly ready. You don’t buy into it, so you decide to take it slow. You were barely inside her and she was in pain, so in a few seconds, it’s really gonna hurt.
It’d be for the best, you think, to maybe try and loosen her up. With that thought, you lick your finger for some added lubrication and rub it along the white mare’s tight slit.
You slide a single, slippery finger into her slit, feeling her walls close around it, being careful not to wiggle it too much.
“Heh… See?” she asks, panting. “This isn’t so bad, ja?”
“That’s just my finger.”
Her blue eyes widen as she looks back, noticing that you are telling the truth. She swallows hard before taking a deep breath and looking up to you with an unsure smile.
“It is… good!” she says. “Good. You are having fun... Good. Please, Herr Jay, not to worry about me. J-Just do as you like… I am here to serve…”
She is a weird one. She continues to mumble to herself as you begin to wiggle your finger about, trying to loosen her up a bit as to not hurt her in a few moments.
You’re starting to get a little worried, though, as you wonder if her being so tight will end up hurting you. Nevertheless, you want to find out. This chick wants you to fuck her, and by God, you’re going to do it!
You withdraw your moist finger, rubbing it against a second finger to get it nice and slick before slowly inserting both digits into Aryanne. It takes a considerable effort, but with a skilled enough push, both finger manage their way into your friend.
“Oh God!” Aryanne grumbles, teeth clenched. “It’s… so n-nice…”
The strain in her voice would suggest otherwise, but you continue anyway, for if you stopped she would insist you continue.
Your free hand grips her butt cheek, pulling it off to the side in the hopes of further exposing the mare. With her butt high in the air, you give it a few kisses, letting your partner know you’re here for her. Your fingers slowly work themselves in and out of her, trying to get her to loosen up.
The digits quickly become coated in Aryanne’s arousal, making your efforts that much easier as they slide in and out with less trouble. The mare slowly begins to loosen as your efforts increase and she becomes more wet.
You extend your thumb to caress her clitoris, hopefully adding more pleasure than what’s she currently feeling.
“Th-That is much… good,” Aryanne pants, sweating, as her horn begins to glow a soft blue light.
Now you’re genuinely scared. Your fingers stop moving as you wonder if Aryanne is about to execute you. She used her magic to do that shit earlier and she must be using her magic now if her horn is lit, but you can’t tell what she’s doing exactly.
“What is wrong, Herr Jay?” she asks, looking back at you, seeing you staring at her horn.
“Doing some magic, there?” you ask nervously.
“Hmm? Oh, no. Th-This is a sign of physical arousal, Jay. I am being stimulated, ja?”
That she is, you think. Either that or you’re doing something wrong, so you guess you ought to continue with this. It seems to be working so far.
You withdraw your fingers completely, rubbing them against each other, teeming with Aryanne’s juices before licking them clean yourself, enjoying the sweet taste. A strand of her sticky fluids trickles down between her legs and onto your mattress, staining it.
You give Aryanne’s butt a few final, tender kisses, hoping all that was enough for another go at her. You sit up onto your knees and grab onto her flanks, positioning yourself behind her for round two.
Your erection prods at the entrance to Aryanne’s slit, eager to find a way in. Luckily, this time around, it only takes a moment before the tip slides in and you’re ready to start pounding away.
Tragically enough, you remind yourself that you have to be gentle, so instead of fucking Aryanne into the bed, you stay exactly where you are, waiting for Aryanne to adjust.
Judging by her reaction, she still isn’t ready. She didn’t make any noises or jump away, but her forelegs are covering her red face.
How tight can this girl physically be? Seriously. You’ve only just gotten inside her and she looks miserable. Shouldn’t stallions be more hung than you? That seems like a safe assumption. If a mare can take them, then taking you shouldn’t be an issue.
Nevertheless, here you are.
Before you give her the opportunity to say anything, you slide the rest of way in until your hips are pressed against her ass.
“Ow! Ow! Ow!” she cries, but doesn’t try to move away from you. “Ah! Oh, jeez.”
“Are you okay?” you ask, already assuming the answer.
“J-Ja! Very okay… One mo-moment, please, Herr Jay. Mmph!”
Her warmth paired with her inner walls wrapping around your length is almost enough to make you blow right there, but you manage to keep yourself under control.
Seeing what you’re able to do to this woman by barely touching her is making you really look forward to the next few minutes. Once you start moving, she’s either gonna be in a lot of pain or pleasure… or both. Who knows.
The fact that Aryanne wants to please you so much is concerning, you think. For some unknown reason, this woman you met like 12 hours ago desperately wants to take you for a ride.
There’s still something off about this whole scenario, but you’re going along with it regardless. It’s too late to turn back now.
“R-Ready, now, Herr Jay,” she mutters unconvincingly. “You m-may proceed at… at your own pace.”
Without another word, you pull almost completely out of the mare and slam back in, slapping her plump backside with your groin hard enough to make a loud *plap*.
“Aahhh!” she screams before biting down hard on her own foreleg, her eyes starting to water.
“All right,” you say, “that’s enough. We’re stopping.”
You pull all the way back out and sit down on the bed again as you did once before already.
“B-But Herr-”
“No, Aryanne,” you interrupt as she turns towards you, a tear rolling down her cheek. “It’s not fun if you’re getting hurt.”
“B-But-”
“I’m serious.” You wipe the tear off her cheek with your thumb, with Aryanne looking at you sadly. “No more. I’m serious.”
“I have an idea,” she says meekly, eyes darting around the tent.
“What’s that?”
“An idea? It’s a-”
“No, I mean, what is your idea?”
“Oh! W-Well, I said I would please you, and I still wish to… to do so… So I was thinking… maybe… I could be on top?”
“I don’t want to hurt you.”
“I know! I know!” she says, scooching closer to you, putting her flank against your hip. “I can handle this,” Aryanne says, stroking your slick erection with a soft, furry hoof. “I-It hurt a bit - but only a bit! It’s j-just the moving that… that hurts. But if I am on top, I control the moving, ja? So I will not be in pain and I can please you!”
She looks hopefully up at you with a nervous smile, still stroking your cock, while you wonder what you’re supposed to do.
She clearly wants to do this, and you really can’t say why. There are a lot of other things she could be doing that don’t involve her hurting herself.
However, and more importantly, you honestly don’t care why she wants to do this; she just wants to do this! Something good is finally happening, and you’ve stopped all lines of questioning in the hopes that this will actually happen.
This chick wants to take you for a ride? Well bring it the fuck on then!
So much bullshit has been happening, you don’t care!
She just sucked you off and it was amazing! It was a short experience, but it was amazing. Now that you’re prepared, this next potential experience is bound to be longer and way more fun. It’s finally your time.
This will probably help a lot with stress. Eventually, if you stay stressed long enough, you will get a heart attack and die. Can’t have that happen.
Fucking this pony will not only make you feel better, but it’s bound to make Aryanne feel good. As far as you know, you’ve never been laid before, especially if you’re only two weeks old…
(Does that technically make Aryanne a pedophile?....)
...But you’re probably half decent at it, and with how Aryanne has been practically begging for it all night, she’s bound to enjoy whatever you give her. To some extent anyway.
This should be great...
Nevertheless, something just feels wrong about the whole thing… You don’t know what, precisely, but something’s just… off...
What would Jesus do?
“You sure you want to do this?” you ask, trying to make sure the small pony knows what she’s getting into.
“Jawohl!”
“Well, if you’re sure,” you smile, not bothering to give the situation anymore thought. Now’s not a time for thinking, Jay! It’s a time for doing! And it’s time for doing a pony!
“Very sure!” she smiles confidently. “This will be an… unique experience for us both. Let us begin?”
“If you insist,” you smile, petting the small girl, pushing her mane out of her face. She smiles happily at you while her furry hoof continues to gently stroke your erection. “What do you want me to do?”
“Oh! Uh… I don’t know! Here, lay down on your back.”
Under Aryanne’s command, you lie supine on the bed, erection sticking straight up, as your partner nervously climbs on top you. She makes sure not to put her full weight on your groin, and seems apprehensive with being too forceful on you. She gently eases her butt down on top of your groin, grinding her pelvis into yours.
“Are you ready, Herr Jay?” Aryanne sweetly asks, putting her forelegs on either side of your head. Her warm breath washes over your face as she leans in, pecking you on your nose.
“As I’ll ever be,” you say, hoping that you get to finish this time.
Aryanne lifts her body off of yours while her horn lights up brighter than it already was and you feel her grip your erection. Honestly, if she wanted to just use her magic on you, you wouldn’t mind. The soft, tingly feeling you’re experiencing right now is unlike anything you’ve ever felt before.
The pony lines herself up, easing your swollen member into her dripping marehood. Aryanne gasps at the feeling, her eyes locking into yours as she extinguishes her magical grip on you, before very slowly and deliberately easing herself down upon you.
After what feels like an eternity of squeaks and gasps, she eventually manages to take you all the way to the base. She sits up straight, her forelegs now dangling in front of her chest as she works her hips back and forth, becoming accustomed to your length.
She releases a few hot and heavy breaths, looking desperately down at you, but what exactly you’re supposed to do, you don’t know. You can’t move, lest you hurt her, so lying in this exact spot is how life is going to be.
You place your hands on her flanks, trying to hold her in place as she appears to be having trouble keeping her balance.
“I do not know where to put my hooves,” she pants, glancing down at the hooves that are dangling in front of her chest. “I cannot keep balancing.”
“Just put them on me,” you suggest simply, wondering why she didn’t bother doing that in the first place.
“Are you quite sure?”
“Yeah, don’t be silly, come here.”
You pull Aryanne forward and she extends her forelegs, pushing her hooves against your chest to keep herself held upright.
“Thank you, Herr Jay.”
Aryanne uses her new leverage to lift herself up a bit, withdrawing from you almost entirely and you can feel the heat coming off of her and her fluids leaking down your length.
Aryanne, in a fit of overconfidence, plops her rump down into your groin, engulfing you manhood in her slit in half a second.
“Aaah!” Aryanne cries, unashamed to yell out as loud as she desires. You hope no one thinks she’s in pain and comes into your tent. That’d be awkward.
Her eyes shut tightly as she becomes readjusted to the new sensation once again, and you hope she slows down a bit. The warmth and wetness of her womanhood combined with Aryanne’s forceful thrusting is almost enough to make you explode.
Aryanne’s juices provide an excellent lubricant as she slides up and down your length, her gaze shifting between your eyes and between her legs.
Her sweat mixes with yours as her bottom slaps against your groin and thighs, the room getting hotter and hotter as your new friend starts picking up the pace, losing herself in the ecstasy of the moment.
“Th-That feels so good!” Aryanne gasps, her thrusts becoming deeper and more frequent. Her eyes appear to have shrunken somehow as she gazes into yours, silently begging for you to give her that satisfying release.
Hearing Aryanne’s lust filled moans encourages you to help her move faster, and you do so by gripping her fat rump and slamming her down upon your manhood and you feel yourself inch closer to finishing.
“Ah! Ah! Ah!” Aryanne yelps as her bottom hits the base of your shaft. “I-I feel funny,” Aryanne whimpers with her ears folded back, looking to be on the verge of tears as she thrusts down into your groin again and again and again.
At this point, you’re too lost in bliss to listen to whatever she’s saying, so you carry on. As Aryanne reaches the peak of her thrusting, with your length just barely inside her, you slam your hips upwards, penetrating her as deep as you can.
“J-Jay!” she screams as her inner walls tighten unexpectedly. You feel her moistened cavern close in around your member, feeling a tremendous warmth rush over it. Aryanne almost collapses, but manages to hold herself upright as she pushes against your chest.
You grab her ass as hard as you can, thrusting as hard as you can into the exhausted mare. After a few moments, you feel a tremendous buildup and climax into the exhausted unicorn.
“Ah, ja! Ja! Give me your babies! Fill me with your life giving cum!”
Well, that’s certainly an odd thing to shout, but it’s pretty hot, so you’re rolling with it.
Your eyes begin to roll as you expel yourself into the mare’s soaked cavern, covering her walls with your seed. Aryanne moans again and again as your cock throbs deep inside her, a warmth like she’s never felt coming over her.
After taking the most satisfying breath you’ve ever had in your life, you flop onto the mattress, exhausted. Aryanne, not trying to hold herself upright any longer, collapses on top of you, her head flopping onto your sweaty chest.
Looking down at the small unicorn, you see her hind leg twitching as she continues to ride out her orgasm with you still inside her while she wraps her forelegs tightly around your torso.
In the meantime, you figure it’d just be for the best to wait for her to come back to reality. You run your fingers through her mane, thinking about what you just did.
You had sex with a pony.
And it was good. It was really good. This is easily the best thing that has ever happened to you. If you could get a beer right now, life would be amazing.
But you’re not going to push your luck. Life is fine right now.
Nevertheless, subconsciously you can’t shake the feeling that you’re doing something wrong. You don’t know why that feeling is pestering you so much. Life is great! It’s the best it has ever been.
Forget Daring! You got Aryanne lying on top of you right now. Daring gives you up for money and Aryanne fucks you because she wants you to be happy.
Which one of them should you care about? Aryanne, obviously. Fuck Daring.
“That was nice,” Aryanne breathes, looking up at you. “Did you enjoy it, Herr Jay?”
“I did,” you respond with a simple smile, running your fingers through her mane, making her smile.
“I did not mean for this to take so long. It is getting late and we must journey north tomorrow. It will be a busy day, so I will leave you to get a good night’s rest, ja?”
Aryanne rises to her hooves, slowly withdrawing herself from your now flaccid member and you both sit up a bit.
As you look down upon yourself, you notice something is incredibly wrong. For some reason, it appears your manhood has been cut and you are bleeding slightly. You reach down to find the cut, but find nothing.
“I think I’m bleeding,” you announce to Aryanne, the only being who could theoretically help you in this situation. She moves towards you, putting her face up to your crotch and observe your flaccid member.
“Do not be worried, Herr Jay,” she beams, bringing over a towel to wipe you clean. “The blood would be mine.”
“Yours?” you ask worriedly. “Are you alright? Did you get cut?”
“No, Herr Jay, of course not. This is from, how you say... popping the cherry!”
…
What?
“I have, uhm… I have lost my virginity with you, Herr Jay!”
What?
“I have saved myself for you since I was a little filly!”
What?
“I have never had sexual activity before… even with just myself!”
What?
“I have waited many years for this. I am happy to have pleased you, Herr Jay. Are you pleased?”
What the fuck is going on?
“I found it much difficult… But we persevered, yes?”
What the fuck is going on? Have you heard anything this woman has said correctly? Are you having a stroke?
“The Fuhrer will be so pleased with me!” Aryanne squees with a giddy smile. “I will provide him an heir! A strong ruler to lead the Vaterland to greatness! Everypony will be most pleased with me. What an honor it is to serve!”
What the shit is she going on about? You knew you had a bad feeling about all this, and that feeling has only intensified.
“I hope that has worked,” she remarks, rubbing a hoof on her belly. “It will be a long wait, but our child will be worth it, yes?”
That bad feeling from earlier is now a terrible feeling. You haven’t felt this terrible since an hour ago. You can’t even wrap your head around what’s going on but you just know it’s awful.
What have you done?
“To make sure it has worked and I bear our child, we should have intercourse twice a day until I’m pregnant, ja?”
This is a joke. Surely. This can’t be real. Life can’t be real.
Something great happened to you like 5 minutes ago in form of sex. Now something awful is happening, which is Aryanne wanting to bear your children.
For her leader.
What the shit? Are you understanding all that right? Is there something you’re missing? There must be something you’re missing.
“Before we leave in the morning we can do this again, ja?” Aryanne giggles.
Do what again? The sex? You don’t think you want to anymore. But can you really turn her down? What’s going to happen now?
“Just a precaution,” she says, suddenly cuffing one of your wrists to the metal bedframe. “I can’t have you leaving, I’m sure you understand. Please don’t think of yourself as a prisoner; you’re my special guest! If you need anything, there is a guard outside. If you need me, send for me! I am here for you... Guten nacht, Jay.”
Aryanne gives you a surprise peck on the lips but you’re too stunned to respond. You’ve become paralyzed at some point in Aryanne’s strange ramblings. The small white pony puts on her clothes, wishes you a goodnight one last time and exits the tent, leaving you alone.
Your mind is swimming once again. You were hoping for a pleasant night’s sleep, but that’s not going to happen.
Why was Aryanne saving herself for you ever since she was a child? Did she know you were going to pop up one day and be available to fuck? Why does she want your children? Is that why she’s been so nice to you? Is that what your use to her and her buddies are? Has the guard been standing outside the tent the entire time? Did he hear you fucking his captain?
Those questions and more press into your existence, refusing to leave.
As you lie on the bed, wrist cuffed to the bedframe, your ever active mind races and races, getting faster and faster before it stops all together and you settle on one thought.
