The misadventures of some random person turned Manticore

by Cloverleaf

First published

Well, I never expected this. A world full of mystery, danger, and.... talking ponies? Also, why am I a big cat?

I was out on a typical camping trip with my brother Evan. Tents were set up, the sun had set, and all was fine and dandy. But the next morning started off so weird. I had paws, my brother was gone, and some big bug got in my face! Add the salt of my stuff all being stolen, and you can tell it was going to be a weird day indeed, or days.

Cancelled. But if anyone wants to take the idea and run with it, my only condition is you send me a link to it.

Wake up call

View Online

There's a lot to say about darkness. When you experience it, it's an all encompassing force that chokes you from all sides, yet leaves all the room to breath you need. It invites the unknown, the dangerous, the terrifying. Yet at the same time it can be inviting. Be a gateway for your imagination to flow, run wild. A blank canvas. After all, you must experience darkness before the realm of dreams can manifest.

So when my eyes cracked open that morning, and the darkness surrounding me fell away, I had to question if I had truly opened my eyes or if they were playing tricks on me, and this was another dream. Some small part of me told me I'm stupid, because I couldn't possibly be aware of it without it being lucid.

The first thing that came into view was the grass around me, bright, with the sun shining on it. A small smile crept up on my face, as I thought it'd be a wonderful day. That smile faded quickly however, when a realization dawned on me. The sun was shining on the grass. There was only one explanation. My eyes glanced upward, and I groaned. Yep, someone stole my tent....again.

My gaze glanced back down to see if they only took that, when they came upon a curious sight. It, looked like a bug. A big bug. Big enough it's fangs were about as long as one of my fingers would be, possibly longer. That and the fact they were gleaming white. So apparently it hadn't fed on anything in a while, which means maybe I should leave before it woke up. Well, first step was to get up, slowly, quietly. So I looked down and put my paw down on the ground proper to stand up.

Paw.

I have a paw.

Why do I have a paw?

I laid back down and moved it out from under me, holding it up to my face. The fur was a dark reddish brown. The paw itself was big, and somewhat catlike. I flexed it a bit, and yes, I have claws. Definitely a cat's paw, and a big cat at that. Still didn't answer my question, but it did mean one thing. If this was the case, I was actually a lot bigger than the bug. Another smile crept on my face as a bit of curiosity got the better of me, and I reflected on the irony of letting that happen.

New order of business, find a stick. Whether or not I was bigger than this bug by me, I was not going to touch it directly. Could be diseased. It's body looked like it had holes in it after all. Didn't take long to find one suitable, since it was sitting right next to me, but a new problem arose. I had paws. Now, of course, finding and using a stick should have been easy, but considering the fact I had, overnight, somehow turned into a big predatory animal that doesn't have opposable thumbs made it a much more difficult chore. My first attempt had been to grab it inbetween two toes. It ended up with a splinter in one that hurt like heck pulling out. At least I found my teeth were sharp enough to dig into the splinter.

So then I tried hooking it with a claw. That ended with a section of it snapping off. So now i had a smaller stick, and a realization I should be very careful if I get an itch. In the end I settled on picking it up with my mouth. My first try there caused a gag reflex, and I started coughing. Once I finally settled down and my respect for dogs grew a little, I looked back over to the bug. A pair of blue instectoid eyes greeted my gaze with their own. It got up, a tad shakily, then dropped back down. Well, whatever it was, it was about, sheesh, maybe the size of a small horse. Smaller than I felt I was, but, it definitely didn't stand like a bug.

No, something about it was nagging at me, Like I should know what this thing was. A trip down memory lane commences as I fiddle through all my knowledge of animals, which in truth was a mass of memories on their general appearance. Nothing matched, so I considered more mythical nature. I considered what little I knew of greek and norse mythology, pop culture, and- wait. Something did come up there, in pop culture. My younger brother Evan had gone gaga over some show about colorful horses recently. He had shown me something like this bug in front of me, but I couldn't wrap my head on the name.

Still, the absurdity of the thought. I was sitting in front of some make believe creature from a kids show. Did Evan slip me some mushrooms or something last night, and where was he anyway? It was his idea to go camping.

I guess It must have thought I wasn't paying attention, cause when I looked back down it was right in front of me, looking at me. It seemed stable on it's legs, which honestly, with all those holes in them, I was amazed about. Darn things didn't look like they'd support a laptop. I tried to put on a smile, which must have scared it, cause it backed away and started flapping some holey wings on it's back. This, thing, whatever it was, didn't make sense at all. All those holes, even in it's wings. How could it even fly like that?

Well of course I was forced to eat my words as it took flight and shot off, the sound of it's buzzing fading into the distance. Well, whatever it was, it was gone, and I was back to contemplating how in all heck I turned into a big cat. I needed to see exactly what kind, and find my brother. I once again moved to get up. I put all four paws down on the ground and tried standing up straight. Being on all fours felt weird, but at least some early movement training all people go through helped. One paw at a time, slowly.

It took a matter of minutes to get a hang of it, well, that and a few sudden mouthfuls of dirt and grass, but I was on my way, whichever way that was.....

Frogs and Horses

View Online

My travels found me on a winding path, going who knows where. The forest itself seemed to be encroaching on me, whispering to me, like there was somebody there, trying to divert me from my path. Like staying on it was helping, I couldn't tell if I was going in circles or not. First off, I didn't have my compass, second of all, my foot...err, pawprints, being masked by similar ones. Guess I'm not the only big cat in the forest. Did others fall to the same fate, or was I still on some drug trip?

Course, the whole fact that there are big cats like the body I have now roaming in here was a troubling thought. There was a town near the edge that Evan and I passed through. People there had seemed nice, pointed us to the campsite. If they knew about the felines, why didn't they tell us. On that matter, why wouldn't they alert us to big bugs out there, or the fact a person can turn into one of the cats while sleeping in here? Even then, I still didn't see a sign of my brother.

Finally, the treeline let up, and I had found a pond. A scummy lake, so covered in green, I questioned if I could stand on it, and there were frogs everywhere. They kept clear luckily, guess afraid of me. I looked around at them, and for some reason my mind contemplated frog legs. I couldn't help but chuckle at the thought. My voice, even then, sounded different, grittier, almost a growl. It makes me chuckle more. Like I could fill the role of fierce predator. Course, now that my funny bone was tickled, it went the extra mile and I was laughing, falling to my side.

This caused a sharp pain to go up my side as my weight landed on, something. Yelping, and killing my mood at the same time, I rolled onto my stomach, relaxing as the pain faded rather quickly. Whatever it was, I couldn't put my full weight on it like that. Putting aside those thoughts, I got up and decided to finally get a look at what I was. splashing away some of the scum off the water, i was able to get a clear enough idea. I looked like some kind of lion, though not any normal lion. Oh, i had the fierce eyes and the flowing mane of a large male lion, but my nose seemed...more batlike in appearance, my ears too. My lower canines seemed to be poking up in huge sharp fangs. How I didn't notice that earlier I don't know. Turning sideways a bit, I looked again to see what had caused the pain. On my side was something leathery, somewhat thick, and covered on the top by the same fur my paw had been. It was a wing, a batlike wing.

I had wings.....Hot damn I had wings! I tried to focus on what muscles controlled them, and found it rather easy to flex them. This was incredible! Self powered flight was in my grasp, I could feel it, this was gonna be so much....what the heck kind of tail do I have? Something long, segmented, and almost insectoid in appearance greeted me in my reflection as it came more into view. At the end of it was a long and very dangerous looking stinger. That tore it, I wasn't just some cat, I was a cat of mythical legend, a freak of nature. That tail sealed it in my head, and reflecting on various mythology before had helped. I was a manticore. A freaking manticore!

I don't know if my mind was able to wrap my head completely around that, but in my excited state, I had at some point tried to take flight, and was immediately getting a deep drink. It took a few seconds of flailing wildly, thinking I was drowning, before my paws hit the bottom. Of course, just a short ways away from the edge, it was still the shallows. Glad nobody saw that, I waded out, and shook myself dry as best I could. The smell that I had been ignoring up to this point finally got to me and caused me to gag. Ok, needed to find high ground, find civilization, and find a shower. I was not going to spend the rest of my life smelling like this. The very thought of it was....was the ground shaking?

A quick turn back to the pond shows that bubbles are forming. Big bubbles, and a bunch of ripples over the pond. Thinking it best to avoid any kind of confrontation with whatever can make bubbles that big, I darted back into the treeline, and watched from my new hiding spot. What popped out of the water was a serpent's head, and then another, and another, and another! They snaked up into the air as they got taller and taller, until what seemed to be the big thing making the ground shake came up out too. All four of these serpents were connected to one body, and they were HUGE! All of them seemed to be looking around, trying to find something. The realization hits me like a ton of bricks. They were looking for me.

I needed to stay hidden until they gave up, or run off now before they could potentially spot me. Getting caught by one of these things, well, I was probably big enough to warrant being labeled a snack to this thing. The whole fact there is a multi headed serpent the size of a semi truck, no, bigger than a semi truck, a...I had nothing to properly compare it to! Anyway, the fact something this big, lived here!? What was that town thinking!? This beast could stomp right in and take it by storm! I needed to get out of here, but how?

That question fell to the side as one of the heads looked this way, and kept it's gaze there. I swear it was looking right at me, and I would have pissed my pants....If i was wearing any. Fairly certain I wasn't, so I just ended up standing in a warm puddle for the moment. The staredown continued for what seemed like an eternity, until finally, that head turned away...and another head looked this way. Again, a minute of crippling fear, followed by another as the third head did it, then the fourth. Good thing I couldn't piss more.

After what seemed like four eternities, the heads convened, and then, the whole thing went back into the depths of the swampy area. I waited for around what I figured was ten minutes, with nothing happening. Stepping out, with my eyes darting back and forth, I slowly make my way around the water, avoiding making any noise possible, and start climbing my way up a rocky outcropping nearby. Given there was a path up, it was easy. Can't imagine rockclimbing would be easy as I am now. The trip up takes a good twenty minutes, with a few actual rockclimbing sessions that dare not be repeated again, until finally at the top, I get a good view of the world around me. The trees spread out into a vast forest, and I kicked myself, or tried to at least, for taking myself deeper into it. I needed to find a landmark, something to get me out of here. A few mountains off in the distance, what appears to be a small renaissance style village somewhere closer. I blink and double check as my gaze falls on one mountain past this village.

No way, no way a city could hold itself up on a mountainside like that. It was impossible! 'As impossible as turning into a manticore overnight is?' My mind pushed. Ok, so my head made sense. What else could explain it, or that bug, or the serpent, thing....HYDRA! It was a hydra! Another mythological creature. Seriously, what in the world was going on? Was I on earth? Did I get sucked into some new world? No, it has to be mushrooms, or some drug, it'll wear off soon. Just have to wait...Not waiting, that hydra could wake up again, and it would have spotted me up here, and there's no ay I'd feel pain in a hallucinated limb. So, I look to climb down, when another bit of curiosity catches in my head. I obviously couldn't power flight with these wings, but...what if I tried acting like a hang glider?

A quick look around finds a suitable ledge to take off from, and convenient for me it was pointed at the village. I needed to get there, find a doctor, and hope that they can tell me what happened to me. Oh gees I hope it's not contagious. Rearing up, I unfold my wings again. That still felt weird, but give it enough time....A hop, skip, faceplant. Shaking my head, I step further back, and bound forward and leap off the edge. Keeping my wings steady i begin to fall, very slowly. It, it was working! If only I had a certain toy or two I'd be mimicking one classic of a movie scene here.

The glide itself was rather uneventful, though my inner self was simply going weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! Eventually the treetops came up to me, but I was so close to the edge of the forest it didn't matter. A few proken branches, a couple bruises, and a definite thud later, I was on the ground again. I congratulated myself for making it safely out of these crazy woods. 'Hey bonehead, what about your brother?'

Well shit, there went my mood. He had to be in there somewhere still. In the forest, with, all the fantasy creatures and the same forest that turned me into one. No, if I was going to look for him, I needed to find help first. A quick scan again, there was a cottage nearby. Looked quaint. Maybe they knew about the forest. All it took was a quick stroll and-

"Halt!"

Shit, the cops now? I look around, nobody there, so wait, did I just imagine that. A light thud in front of me tells me otherwise, followed by several others. It, was a horse, in golden armor, carrying a spear, surrounded by other horses in gold armor also carrying spears. But the kicker, the big kicker. They all looked exactly the same, from their cartoonish looking eyes, to their armor, to their spears, their pure white coats, and finally to their....wings?

Ok, really, this was getting completely absurd. Too much, and my brain told me it was going to stop trying to contemplate the situation. I went from surprised, to smiling. Smiling went to snickering, and finally i flopped down laughing my weird looking head off. I figured they'd ease up, but nope. The spears came down, fully pointed at me.

"Back in the forest monster." The one closest to me was snarling, and this just sent me into another fit of laughter. That face, it was, it was just too much. A face like that just can't look menacing. I look up at him as my laughing dies once again to snickering and the occasional giggles. And for the first time in hours, actually open up my big fat mouth to say something.

"Pfft, You guys, pegasuses, or, what is the plural for a pegasus? Doesn't matter, this, this is too much." My good mood faded when they were looking at me in mild shock, and a couple of them murmured something about it talking. Was it that odd? They could after all, so why was it so odd I could?

"Sir. Clearly it's sentient, we can't drive it from society." One of the two in the back says. Which one was he talking to, how could they tell?

"It's still a dangerous creature, and was clearly heading for the home of one of the Elements. It goes back in." The one in front. Ok, he was in charge. Again the one in the back pipes up.

"Comet, Sir, with all due respect. The sentiency law enacted last year, from Rorandun vs The State, clearly says any creature showing signs of sentiency is to be considered under the law the same as any Equestrian citizen." Equestrian? Horse puns now? Oh gees this was either one heck of a drug trip, or I've gone insane, killed my brother, and am now making a whole new world in my head. But then again, Equestrian, where have I heard that before? Again the one in charge, his name known to me now, glares.

"You have a point Sunburst. Still, Sunburst, Cutting Edge, you two will escort this manticore to Canterlot. I want him kept him check at all times. The rest of you are with me. We still need to find that changeling that flew off earlier." I resisted the urge to snicker at the name Canterlot. Again with the horse puns. Changeling stuck in my head though, like, again, I'd heard it before, Canterlot too. I brush it aside for now and try to get their attention.

"Hey, as much as I would love to go to this, Canterlot, I still need help finding my brother. He's in that forest still." Comet looks at me funny for a second, then glares.

"I'm not letting you lead my squad into a trap here. Go, before I have you put behind bars for resisting a military officer." What, the life of someone else wasn't enough to warrant him helping me. Sunburst and Cutting edge flanked me, and motioned for me to follow. The spears were pointy, I'll give them that much. I lowered my head, and went along. We passed the cottage on our way, and a butter yellow horse with a pink mane watched on. I gave her a weak smile. She looked on the verge of jumping in and doing something rash. Something about her, it tugged at me, so I looked her in the eyes and just mouthed no. I think she got it, or maybe she thought I was crazy, cause she swooped inside. Maybe she mistook it for boo, I don't know.

Our trip was short, and I was ordered into a covered carriage. Soon as the door's locked up, i look out a knothole in the wood. They were harnessing....themselves up? Ok I guess that made sense, if not a little weird and- I was shaken from my train of thought as they take off, not running, flying, and taking me with them! I looked out the back window, yes, the village we had been in for a short time was slowly fading away. I sigh and turn to see a bright pair of blue eyes in my face, surrounded by a pink coat and a mane that looked very much like cotton candy. I'll be honest, I nearly screamed like a little girl, but she put a hoof in my mouth before I could.

"Shh." She looks around real quick, then whispers. "I was gonna say hi and welcome you to Ponyville, but I'll wait till you come back to throw you a proper party. Bye!" She hopped up on my head, and I reached up to grab her, but nothing. I looked up, all over, rolled over, nothing. She was gone. My brain decided to just cut away all pretenses and just shut down. And so then I fainted.

Some crazy lizard thing

View Online

The pony on the other side of the bars finishes writing down what I had finished explaining before tipping a nod to me. "Well, I must say, seems an intersting story. I'll be bringing this up the ladder. Sorry though, looks like you might not get out of here for a bit." With a final tap of his quill on the paper, he rolls everything up and puts it away. Only then did that blue aura fade away from both quill and paper.

Really now, first pegasi (a guard had corrected me after getting it wrong one too many times.) Now unicorns. Today was definitely turning out crazy. Reflecting on the morning had been odd in and of itself. Telling it to a being out of myth, and them writing it down, now I was crossing into the realm of crazy. Even more crazy, I was telling them while they were outside a cell I was in. Yeah, like this makes any sense, but then again I'd given up on making sense the second that pink pony had disappeared on me.

The cell itself, obviously wasn't built for something of my size. I didn't have much room, even when they made reasonable accomodations and took out the wall next to me to turn two cells into one. It worked some, but that can only go so far when they don't clear out the rubble, or take you out of the cell before they knock the wall down, from the other side.

Another bout of coughing, another chunk of rubble pops out of my mouth. That hadn't happened for a few hours at least, so maybe it was the last one. The rubble pile did do one thing. It made it easier to see out the window and enjoy the view. The expanse outside was amazing. Still can't understand how they got a city to stay standing on the side of a mountain. Maybe they had a crack team of unicorns constantly holding it up. That thought dismisses entirely, and feels almost as if it simply fell out of my head.

But back to the view. Incredible, the valleys below, the air, so crisp and so thin in oxygen from being near the top of a damn mountain! Eh, didn't mean much, I wasn't exerting myself enough for it to matter. I slide down the wall, ignoring the jab from a rather sharp piece of rubble, and turn around. Guess there isn't much to do but just sit and wait.

My first visitor came in the form of a unicorn guard. Again I am brought to question how such a small horse could try so hard to look stern and fail miserably at it. Nevertheless, I shall not say this out loud, at least to him, since he has my lunch after all. It's quickly slid through, and he just as quickly leaves. Well, guess it's time to chow down on....what is this? Hay, alfalfa, lettuce? Come on, where's some steak from good old Betsy the cow?

***

Back in Ponyville, a cow sneezes, causing a few others to look up at them.

"Ooh bless ya Betsy dearie." One of them says to the one who had sneezed.

***

I felt, a sudden feeling of emptiness, for just a moment there. Shaking my head, I look up to see another horse standing in front of my cell door. It...looks an awful lot like the crazy one from the carriage, only difference being it's coat color seemed to follow blue instead. She smiled at me.

"Silly, don't go projecting yourself at cows now!" And with that, she giggles. I shake my head again, taking my eyes off her for a second. Like the pink one, this was enough, and she was gone, leaving behind a bucket of blue paint. I'm left to question why.

Maybe I'm going insane. Maybe I'm here to pay penance for sins I have no clue about. Maybe I'm still dreaming. Maybe I can will this piece of rubble next to me to turn into a chocolate cake. I focus on it real hard, closing my eyes in the process, then hear something snap. I crack my eyes open again. It, it had turned into cake! I scoop it up, and take a tender bite. Good thing, cause it was just frosted rubble. Yay for not breaking any teeth!

Laughter fills the room. Probably the next room over too, but I can't be certain. Turning once again to the cell door, something even more peculiar stands there. It stood tall, enough it had to slump over to avoid banging it's head on the ceiling. Every single part of it was mismatched and wrong, yet seem to come together in something oh so right. It's laughter subsided as it looked at me, one long fang sticking out of it's mouth.

"Well, when I had heard the guard caught a manticore, I had to see for myself. Could possibly be some bonding time." It spoke in such a way that stated. 'I have all the power and there's not a damn thing you can do.'At least that was my impression. "Still, you went near Fluttershy's house. I can't imagine a bungling oaf such as yourself finding it in you to harm her, but you coming near her put me at unease for a moment." He went from a happy grin to a glare within an instant. Apparently the buttery horse was a friend of his. How something this freaky looking was friends with her, when I merely mouthed a word to her and she bolted, is beyond me.

"I didn't intend to cause her any harm. I was just going to ask her for help in finding my brother. I, didn't even know she was a horse until I was led past." This seemed to earn his glare once more. He honestly was scaring me now with that look. Glad I went earlier, otherwise things would have gotten embarrasing real fast.

PPFRBT

Damnit.

This apparently relights his good mood, because he begins chuckling. When he finally subsides, he looks at me once more with a slightly mischievous look. "Well, he who dealt it shall smell it. Or was that the other way around?" He begins floating in the air, how is anyone's guess. Magic, magnets, hologram? "Regardless. I think we'll get along swimmingly. Care for a chocolate milk of glass?"

"What?"

"A chocolate. Milk. Of glass." He held out a small glass and snapped his claws with the free hand. A small pink cloud pops into existence. I fear possibly it's the pink mare again, but he taps it once, and like that, it begins to....oh gees that is such a terrible joke. Great now that song is stuck in my head. In short order the glass is filled. I wave it away. He shrugs, and drains the glass away from the still formed chocolate milk. I blink. The glass was gone, he just drank it. He didn't drink the chocolate milk. Somewhere between my eyes and my brain something got messed up big time, it had to be.

He looks at the milk for a second before tossing it aside. An explosion occurs, and now the hallway was surely covered in.....confetti? I go into inner monolgue mode with my mind. It doesn't respond. So great, I'm stuck in a cell, some crazy monster is causing reality to go haywire, and my mind just got a blue screen of death. He looks at me and chuckles. "Say something, conversations are boring one sided."

"I'm a good boy......" Where did that come from, why was I sucking on my paw? I shake myself out of this state. "Err, I mean.....actually, there's no recovery from that, is there?"

"Not in the slightest." He snaps his claws again. Wait, I was just in a cell, where did this office come from? He's sitting behind it. "Now, let's see here. Name, unknown, race, manticore. Heh, probably the first time other's been used in ages." He snaps his claws again and the scroll burns up. What was going on, what is the point of all this. He leans over the desk. "Do you know why I called you in here?"

"Err, no...." Stay with me brain, don't you die on me, I need you. I gets the dumb when you shut down ohgoditstarted!

"Darn, I was hoping you could tell me, I forgot." And just like that, magic snappy happens again. The room fades, I'm back in my cell. The door's gone, and he's right there. A part of me, deep down, gets angry, and my mind flatlines.

"This for kill brain!" Lunging at him, claws extended I get about five good swipes in, he simply grabs one limb, then the other. Glaring at me once more, I realize the slashes did nothing to him. So, I figure, test out the tail, and making a lunge to stab him. I would have hit him too, if he hadn't pulled a magic vanishing head trick. The body wavers for a moment before slumping over on me. Despite being lanky, he was heavy! His head reappears next to me, laughing.

"Well, someone got a bee in their bonnet today. But I like that attitude. It shows purpose, destiny, a reason for being." The floating head smirked. Occasionally it spun or did a frontflip. Why, cause it could.

"What....." Ok, for once things seemed, somewhat normal. I shimmied out from under his body, and soon he came back together. "I'll do anything, just, please, no more shtick."

"Feh, no respect for classics. But very well." In a flash he was gone, and the path out clear. "You have a purpose out there little manticore, go out and fulfill it." His voice dies away as laughter echoes in the distance. A purpose, what did he mean?

"I just woke up in the damn woods! What purpose is there in that!?" I lowered my head. I wanted to strangle him. Course I wouldn't get the chance. A quick look down the hall reveals there's noone there. Well, some crazy reality warping monster decided I needed to leave, so, considering I couldn't touch him, maybe it was best I left. Who knows, maybe I did have some purpose here. Couldn't find it sitting in a stuffy cell. Onward!

...

Right after I finish the frosting off the rubble cake that is....

Princesses and patrols

View Online

Another bolt of energy lashes out over my shoulder. Like I needed more encouragement to run. I quickly shoot off down the next turn I find. The corridor in front of me was empty, but the pounding of hoofsteps behind me told me it might not be that way for long. My eyes dart back and forth looking for an exit, which comes in the form of a large door up ahead. A quick grasp with both paws and a tug, the door came open relatively easily.

I slip in and shut the door as quick as possible. This was unfortunately delayed a few seconds from my tail getting caught in it. Biting through the pain, it's also pulled in, and the door shut. I keep an ear to it, hoping to catch them passing by so I can slip behind them and away.

"Where did he go?" "Keep going, he must be past the next bend." "Keep on him, don't lose him!" This continues on for about a minute, but sure enough, the hallway gets a bit quieter.

Sighing slightly as the noise of their hoofsteps and voices fades away, I take a moment to rest, and my curiosity makes me turn around to look in the room. It seems to be a small dining room. There was cake, a salad, a large white coated horse with wings and a horn- wait what?

Our eyes lock onto each other, and nothing is said. All that seems to happen is a piece of cake floats by her head, and there's a small smear of frosting on her cheek. Something about this horse screams to me that I should not do a damn thing, but the cake next to her looks delicious. Well, if she hasn't called the guards yet, maybe she wouldn't mind me having a slice. Inching my way forward slowly, I keep my gaze on her, as she does me.

The moment I reach for the cake, a transluscent blue barrier pops into existence around it. Considering her horn is glowing blue, and the slice of cake next to her has a blue glow around it, I can only guess she's doing it. I can only ask how. Still, she gives me a smile, and the look in her eyes changes ever so slightly. It was the kind of face that was kind, caring, and saying, 'touch it, you die.'

Before I'm able to contemplate how far I want to push my luck, the door bursts open. The guards were back. The one at the head of the pack looks at the situation, and growls. I look back to the large horse, and can't help but notice in the span of a second she had wiped the frosting smear from her face. The loud voice of the head guard snaps my attention back to him.

"Step away from Princess Celestia now." Wait, I was in the presence of royalty? Oh gees I had just tried to pilfer a princess's dessert. Well, I'm boned. I look around the room real quick as the guards advance, all their horns beginning to glow. My eyes settle on a stain glassed window. It seemed to depict some kind of scene, to note a major event in this place's history. I don't have time to contemplate what that event was as I barrel towards it. One smash later I'm falling through the air and snap my wings open. I catch an updraft and soon rise up again.

A few more bolts of energy shoot near me, and I turn sharply. Course, given my lack of experience at this, I forgot one major detail. I have two speeds only. Falling slowly, and really really fast! A park comes up to greet me as I try to catch another draft. I'm saved a fatal crash with the ground, and instead only suffer a smash into a tree. I could seriously hear the line right before I barreled into it coming from somebody nearby. As my head injury makes me wobble, I look over to see a lime green horse, with a darker green mane. Just like the blue one back at the cell, this one looks just like the pink pony that disappeared on me in the carriage. She reaches into a nook in the tree, and pulls out some kind of potion, and gives it to me.

"I always keep healing potions stashed around Equestria, for George of the Jungle reference emergencies." With that she steps on the other side of the tree. I don't even need to look to see she's gone. Though the fact she knew about that.....Honestly, she seems helpful, if not completely insane, so I don't question it. The potion is drank, and its effects are near instantaneous. Curiosity gets the better of me once again, and I move to the other side of the tree. She's sitting there, fiddling with something I can't see. Her tongue is stuck out in concentration, and she seems to be ignoring that I'm here.

"Darn it, this one always gets stuck." With that, some small hole is ripped open, and what feels like a gale force winds sucks her inside. It catches me as well. I keep my eyes on her for maybe ten seconds before flecks of lime green paint smack into my face. It was her! I manage to somehow get the gunk off me, but by then she disappeared again. I have no clue where I'm going here, and tunnels flow off here and there. Suddenly things get bright again, and I look around to see a spa. looking down, I'm in a bowl of sponges. Before anyone notices me, I put a paw down, and tap an unseen button. Back through the tunnels!

This time, I poke out of a bookshelf. Books go scattering everywhere. I look around, and some small purple lizard is staring at me. I grin lightly, and hit another button in error. Back in, though I can hear the lizard running off, yelling "Twilight! Pinkie taught a manticore her secret!"

A trip through once more, and I pop out of a cart, full of apples. Two of them get speared on my lower fangs. An orange horse wearing a hat looks at me, a glare on her face. She points to the apples. "That'll be four bits."

"Uhh, I don't have any?" I reach up to pull them off, but I get sucked back in. Ah well, a snack's a snack! I munch on one as I'm hurtling through this pile of tunnels. Sweetest apple I've ever had, almost sickly so. Finally, after what seemed like forever, I pop out of them once more. This time completely so, and next to a donut shop. I look around, seeing if I'm being followed still, or if the pink one is around to cause more chaos. Seeing I'm in the mountain city again, I wobbly get up. The second apple becomes lunch, and I meander my way into town.

Course, I forgot I'm some big predatory animal and none of these horses can see I'm just confused and lost. Panic ensues, and sure enough, the guard is back again. Well, the chase continues! I dive into the donut shop, scaring some big burly horse. Must be the owner, cause he had a tattoo of a donut on the top part of his back leg. Thinking on it, didn't all the other horses have something like that? Was this a time to be thinking on it? Probably not. Anyway, barreling through I find my way out the back entrance, and heading back up the mountain. A way out and to freedom had to be somewhere.

My next stop on this crazy train is, well, a train. I push through a door near the front, and rush through, barreling by any of the passengers still on their way to their seats. Several briefcases burst open in my panicked run, flinging several articles of clothing in my face. Why do these horses even care about wearing clothes? Guess the more important factor is a tuxedo has gotten hung up on my fangs, and won't shake off.

I reach the final compartment, and for a moment wonder if they still call it a caboose. Shooting through the door, the tuxedo catches on a piece of wood, throwing my momentum off. A quick spiral in the air, and I land on the tracks, just in time for one of those guards to shoot overhead. He looks down at me with a wide eyed expression, possibly trying to figure out how he missed. One thud later, and I'm back on my paws, shooting off again, leaving the guard twitching slightly at the bottom of a support beam. Least my fall got the tux dislodged.

The chase enters a more residential district. A whole bunch of snooty looking unicorns are walking along the road, only to stop and turn to watch the proceedings. Must look lovely. A rogue manticore being chased by a bunch of castle guards. One in particular caught my eye. Blue hair...er mane and tail, a small moustache, and a monocle. The air around him simply screamed fancy. He had what I could simply put as the most sincere smile I ever thought possible. Course this made me slow down, for some reason I just felt rude passing him by, and a couple guards tackled me.

Didn't expect to get away. ah well. It was a good try.....Ah who am I kidding? I tossed them off of me, finding the two guards really light despite the armor. Getting up again, I continued running.

Residential lead to industrial, and it was the cleanest industrial area I've ever seen. Course, that was given since I wasn't seeing any smokestacks or the like. Again this takes a backseat to the guards chasing me. The road becomes a fast moving maze of pipes, metal beams, packs of styrofoam, and...clouds? Normally, considering I'm on a mountain, this wouldn't be odd. What made it odd was one of the pegasi actually pulling a cloud along. Seems some kind of roadblock. I smirk, thinking the cloud cover might give me a chance to lose my pursuers.

One thud later, I learned a valuable lesson about running into clouds.....It hurts like crap man! Shaking my head, I race around it. They were gaining on me, and my breath was getting labored. So I may have a muscular body right now, still doesn't change the fact I'm a couch potato.

Several guards block my path up causing me to turn a sharp right and head deeper into industrial. The roads clear out quick as more guards pour in looking for a way to corner me. A quick leap over a few of them, and I find myself at an entrance to a cave underneath an outcropping. Looking back, nobody in sight, so I duck in.

Well, considering my luck so far, the cave system is probably going to have another hydra or something worse in it. Still, pressing on. The darkness in here seems so foreboding, menacing, and- oh a lamp. Oil powered, and had a spark switch. It came to life easily enough. Surprising something like this would just be lying about, but don't look a gift horse in the-

Ok, maybe not the best analogy to use in this situation. Holding it in my mouth is a bit awkward, but I figured walking on three paws would be more so. The cave, now lit, seems a bit more inviting. I can tell looking ahead it seems to open up to a much wider area fairly quick. I reach a ledge, and look down. What lies before me is a veritable hall of crystal mirrors, except also the ceiling and floor. Well, that tore it. I was going to die lost in this cave cause I can never find the exit. Screw it, I'm gonna die trying. With that, I take my first step forward.

Did I mention I reached a ledge earlier? Yeah, My mind is still reeling a bit from before apparently, cause I forget that fact. I lose the lamp, and fall into a box. Who leaves a box in a dark cave? I sit up rubbing my head, and the sight ahead of me, somewhat surprising that I can see it, is train tracks. A little squeek, and something snapping, and the box begins moving. Well, maybe it'd be better to describe it as a mine cart.

I quickly look about in the cart for anything I can use, a pole, an emergency brake, all mine carts have one of those right? I find a box instead. I can just hear the yo dawg at this point. I look around. Nope, no multicolored pony that looks like a cookie cutter of the pink one. I look back to the box, hoping it has something to help me, and pull it open. I find inside, not a compass, brakes, or anything of the sort. What I find is a fedora.

***

Ten minutes later, and my resulting crash, somehow that fedora stuck with me the whole way, and best of all, nothing broken.....other than half the mine tracks, the cart itself, and a mysterious number of other mine carts and several floating barrels that somehow could propel me. I can feel a permanent eye twitch forming at this point. This world ain't right.

If anything, it lands me near an exit. I look out and can tell I'm much closer to ground level than where I entered, I can make out individual trees below. What does catch my eye is a set of building far off in the distance. They look kinda like skyscrapers. Yeah, heading there. I pull my hat down to half cover my eyes and smirk. Big city, here I come!

.....

"ECHO... echo.... echo.... echo...." Ok, seriously, why didn't I do that when I first got in here?

Why curling a stinger around you is a bad idea.

View Online

The sun is shining, the birds are singing, and the mud is still sticking to my fur....Again, did not think that one through. Then again, when is it ever a good idea to slog through some mud in the middle of the woods. At least I still have my hat.

Having lost track of what way was east, The path in front of me seems bleak. Not as bleak as those other woods were, but still rather bleak. This one seems rather chipper. But even the quaintest of woodlands does not make up for the simple fact I have no idea where I'm going.

I simply sigh and close my eyes. "Can't get much wor-" Again, the feeling of something round and solid on my face, blocking me from saying anything. Groaning, I open my eyes again to see Little Miss Cotton Candy. Now in a delicious orange flavor, but only half done.... She's giving me a serious look, which seems, very disturbing from her.

"You never say that! Saying it out loud always invites trouble in these situations plotwise."

"Plotwise....what....wait, if you have those tunnels out here...you got them to that big city?"

"You gotta go meet a few others first. They're in these woods. Later alligator!" And with that she zips away behind a tree. Oh she's not getting away this time! I bound after her and slip around the same tree. She's gone. This only sends me into a slashing and tearing frenzy, trying to find the entrance. I know it's here!

After making five good slashes into the tree, my reward is a ding. A small handle opens upward, which i promptly grab and pull. I grin, expecting the winds to pull me in again. I instead get a chocolate cake to the face.

A few moments and more sugar than a person could expect to eat in a month, my attention turns back to the platform the cake was placed on, and the note on it.

'Dear New Friend

First off, no. Stop trying to use the tunnel. Second, turn 180 degrees and head straight. you'll get where you need to go in about 6 months, if you travel as fast as a snail, so a few hours.

Sincerely

P.P.'

Well, considering the lack of thumbs, or any digits whatsoever, it's decent handwriting. Of course, good handwriting or not, this does beg the question, do I really want to trust the word of someone who thought it a good idea to shove a cake in my face. I mean really, a perfectly good, delicious cake, wasted for a prank!

On the other hand, she did give me that potion last time I saw her, and she really doesn't seem the type to cause injury to anyone. She just wants a simple laugh. Plus, she seems to know more about where I'm from than she's letting on, so maybe it's best to stay on her good side. Plus she did promise a party when I got back to that town.....

That settled it. I turn right around from that spot and start marching. The path before me seems to open up. The woods thin out a bit, and the shining sun makes an even bigger impression. Honestly, being under the glow of the sun made things seem simply better. I look up to the sky and smile.

My smiles fades as a rather peculiar sight comes about. It's a bunch of pegasi, and they seem to be dragging clouds along with them. What in all honesty could they be doing with them? I just continue watching as they piece these clouds together , slowly blotting out the sun. Their patching goes on for a good five minutes, until there's a cloud layer covering a large section of the woods. Most of them leave, though one remains. He seems....no way. That's not possible.

I can see him sitting, and I do mean sitting, on another chunk of cloud. His wings weren't working to keep him aloft, and he was holding a clipboard, and a writing implement of some kind. Again, my mind starts to shut down from the burn. Too much information to process. How can a horse hold anything with one leg like that, or sit on a cloud!?

Well, whatever was doing it, he stopped doing it, cause when my gaze refocused, he was flying again, putting the last section of cloud in place. This leaves a slot for him to fit through, which he does immediately. The last thing I see him do before my focus was occupied by the rain was him bucking the cloud. At least this deals with the mud and leftover cake stains.

I may be clean, but being soaked is an even worse feeling. Whatever notion of trust I had for that pink monstrosity , well it died there. Getting me to go this way, just to get rained on. No more, I'm not listening to her on this at all! So instead I turn to my right, and shoot off as fast as I can, looking for a place to wait out the rain. The search is....somewhat fruitful. A cave next to a small swamp. The entrance however, is rather waterlogged.

"Oh what's getting more wet...." Throwing caution to the wind, I wade in and make my way to the cave entrance. Just as I'm getting in, however, a rather familiar shaking of the ground occurs, and telltale bubbles form in the water nearby. Time to get scarce! I pick up the pace, moving as fast as I can in the slimy water, when the first serpentine head breaks the surface, and spots me slinking in the cave. With a roar, it begins to charge, dragging the other heads, and it's body, over towards the cave. The main head lunges at me, and slams into the water just behind me, my only saving grace is the overhanging rock.

The next head strikes, and this one, for it's credit, at least is thickheaded. It smashes the entrance of the cave, narrowly missing me once again. The falling debris kicks up some water, splashing me and getting my tail in gear.

Luckily for me the water thins out as I get deeper, but I can still hear that thing at the now ruined entrance. Still, the simple fact it's too small to fit in the cave itself may be my saving grace today. I whip around to face the entrance, and nothing. The only thing I hear is the sound of the rain still going. Did it give up, or Is it waiting for me to show myself? Whether it is or not, I'm not going back to find out. So instead a trip deeper into the cave is in order.

It's not as amazing a cave as the one back at the mountain. Bare rock surrounded by more bare rock. It's dismal. Funny enough the darkness wasn't that bad. The cave itself, however, continued to weave back and forth, up and down. I even ended up having to wade through more water. Stepping out, I shake it off as best I can. Odd, my right leg shouldn't be THAT heavy.

What I find when I look down can only be described as a small alligator, biting me on the leg. Odd, I would think that'd hurt more than it does. It really only feels like it pinches. Oh, what am I thinking? Well, one rational thing to do in this situation......

"GUEEEAGH!" Flailing doesn't work, trying to pry it off makes it hurt more. "Let go of me you littl-"

"Gummy! There you are!" No, not Cotton Candy again. She's completely covered in orange paint this time. Why she's painting herself.....Regardless, at her words the little abomination lets go, and I see why it didn't hurt. The little guy has no teeth. Wow, that seems cruel to the little guy. Immediately it jumps at her and begins biting every place it can get it's little jaws around. It'd be cute if I didn't feel the need to contact PETA.

***

"Do you sense that? Someone's trying to tell us about more animal cruelty." The first man says, looking up suddenly from his plate of broccoli.

"Joe, shut up, you're not psychic." The second one says, flipping through the newspaper.

***

That feeling again, like I'm elsewhere and can almost sense a random conversation. I'm knocked out of it by a tap on my shoulder.

"You were in that elsewhere trance again." The alligator is now firmly gripping on Cotton Candy's mane.

"Why are you here.....and orange this time?" Please, make some sense to me for once you crazy puffball!

"Orange is visible in darkness silly!" Followed by a fit of giggles.

"And pink isn't?" I just sigh and slap my paw into my face. She's of course gone by the time I pull it away. But why, did I strike a nerve? Does it matter, she's gone already. Well, maybe now it's as good a time to sleep as any. Whatever time it is, I don't care. A quick stretch, then I curl up in a big furry ball, wrapping my tail around me. An hour or two, maybe.

***

"Fun! Fun! Fun! Fun! Fun! Fun! Fun! Fun! Fun! Fun! Fun! Fun!" Bouncing pink cotton candy colored ponies all around me. Where did they come from, why were they here, what was with them constantly shouting out fun. What's fun here, why am I contemplating this!?

"Cause you're me silly!" One of them stops and says to me.

I look down, I see pink hooves, pink coat, and have a sudden urge to bounce along with the others. My jaw drops, and I literally see it drop to the floor, that's not possible, what's going on, why do I want fun.....fun.....fun fun fun fun fun fun!

***

"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAGH!"

Shooting up. I quickly look myself over, and for a moment forget what happened yesterday. I se my paws, they're new to me once again, the fur all over me, the feel of my mane, the muscles of my wings, the stinger plunged into my shoulder, wait what?

I look at the offending tail and the venom coated poker on it, and yes indeed, sometime during my nap I stung myself. It comes out easy enough, but now it's bleeding some. Here I thought I'd be immune to my own stuff. Only other time I had such a nasty dream was when I was in the hospital recovering from a rattlesnake bite. Guess it can't kill me at least.

Relaxing a bit, knowing the worst was over. I looked over the hole in my shoulder the stinger left. Can't imagine that'll heal easy. I can at least scrub it some if I find some clean water. My gaze falls back to the path I was following, and fall on a new curiosity.

What stood before me, or, well, more is a what I can only guess is just a really young horse. But several things were off. It had creepy looking slitted eyes, tufts of hair on top of it's ears, little tiny fangs sticking out of it's mouth, and...leathery wings. But more importantly was the look on it's face. It was obviously terrified. I can only guess of me. I hold out a paw to the little horse.

The second I move again, it takes off down further in the tunnel, screaming, and a very high pitched scream, one that actually hurt. After holding my head for a bit, I come to a realization. If the little horse came from that way, it may be another way out. I take off in pursuit.

The trail weaves and turns, but the....guess I'll call him or her bathorse, had a good lead, and probably knew these tunnels better than me. Still, can't fault me for lack of trying. In the end however, I found myself hopelessly lost.

My shoulder decided then it needed to ache something fierce, and I fell to the ground. Well, this isn't fun. Lost in a cave, an injury that's possibly infected, and definitely irritated by toxin. Sighing, I look up to the ceiling.....what is the kid doing there? I just groan, hoping the kid would listen.

"Look, just, I know what I look like, but, are there others? Do you think you could help me here?" Again, the kid goes wide eyed, then drops down from the ceiling to stand in front of me.

"You......talk?" He had a look of terror mixed with childish curiosity.

"Uhh, yeah, can ya give me a hand here?"

"h-h-hand......what.....hand?" Great, kid's illiterate. My fate lies in the grips of some illiterate little texbook abomination. Just might be a redneck.

"Err....I don't know, give me a hoof here, please."

"Oh!" And with that he runs off again. At least this time he's not screaming. Nah, this time it seems more yelling for someone, just instead of actual yelling it's a bunch of clicks and trills. Kid's parents must be nearby if he's calling out. Must not be any other dangers in the cave either.

Waiting stinks, but at least this time it's proving short, as I hear the sound of hooves smacking the ground in a repeated fashion....I guess running would be easier. The kid comes into view, as well as two others. I can only assume their parents. The older two keep a close eye on me. Big kitty won't hurt a fly, I swear!

"So, you're the one our son found. Why are you in here?" Yay the father can talk!

"Escaping a hydra. I'd be further in the cave but apparently my tail got frisky with my shoulder earlier." Ha Ha....penetration.

Maybe that didn't seem the best thing to say, cause the mother gasped, and had her son's ears covered. How was she staying upright? The father simply scowls at me.

"Remember there are children present." I simply deadpan at him. How's a kid going to get what I said? He continues. "Regardless, I don't see why we should help you. You're intruding in our home, and could very well be planning to eat us."

"Starian, dear." The mother seemed a bit mad, but at her husband, not at me.

"Buriella, not now, take Valluran and go back." Starian then turned back to me. "Go back the way you came. You're not welcome here." He scowls, then moves one of his back hooves away a bit. Suddenly he disappears. "Or else I'll be forced to take drastic measures." Came his voice suddenly from right next to me. How did he- I turn to look. A little bit of smoke is dissipating from where he's standing.

"But, what the, how the....Oh forget it......" I slump over, just intending to rest some more. The three of them walk off, leaving me to just, oh I don't know, deal with a possibly infected wound all by myself! Feh, not worth it.

Mere moments after thinking that, I hear a shriek, which oddly enough was cut off rather quick. More of the kid speaking in clicks and trills, but it doesn't take a genius to understand something happened to one of his parents. Without realizing it I'm on my paws again and heading towards them myself.

'Dude, they just left you to fend for yourself, why should you help?' My brain asks me. Of course the answer is cause it doesn't seem right, and perhaps this can prove I'm not out to hurt them either. I pass a couple beds, a small dining area, and then am greeted by a decent lightsource, a way out. The Second my eyes adjust, the scene before me just leaves me confused for a second before it sinks in.

In front of me is Starian, covering both his son's eyes and keeping his shut. Buriella seems completely pale, and is standing stock still, looking at me, her face is locked in a face of fear. It took me a few moments to realize why she was pale, she wasn't flesh and blood anymore. What stood before me was a completely life like statue of her, and a somewhat small creature in front of it, facing away from me.

This thing was an oddity. Scaly small lower body, kind of looked like a miniature dragon. All of it, except for the head. That was covered in bone white feathers, and had one of those red things a chicken has on it's head. Again, I sort through my limited knowledge of mythical creatures. Funny how such trivia has let me identify creatures here. I settle on something I've seen that's similar. Cockatrice. Wait, did it turn Buriella to stone by touch, breath, or gaze?

I didn't have time to find out as it was turning to face me. My eyes shut, and I try my best to listen in, try to get a figure on where it is. I hear a small gust of wind, and then it's breath on me. Gees that smells nasty. What comes next is a peck on my snout, which I could tell already drew blood. No, this thing wants me to open my eyes so it can cause me the same fate. Least now I know it's gotta be eye contact with it to be turned to stone.

Another peck, and I make my move. I swing my left foreleg up to catch it from overhead, and drag it to the ground, forcing it's head down. Taking advantage of my good fortune, I crack an eye open. It's stuck facing the floor, and thrashing to get free as best it can.

"Starian, get something to cover it's eyes...." My voice echoes slightly in the cave, and Starian cracks his own eyes open to look my way. When he sees what position it's in, he runs off for another room, and comes back with some thick rope and a heavy cloth. Binding the lizard bird proved quite easy at this point, and I pulled up away from it. "Now...you little bird. We're going to point you at Buriella, and you're going to turn her back. Then I'll take you out into the woods, and let you go. You don't come back here and bother the nice bathorses-"

"Thestrals." Starian corrected.

"Umm, ok, whatever....Thestrals ever again, and I won't come hunt you down. Deal?" The cockatrice sat there for a second, still pulling at the binds, before finally nodding to me. I pick it up, holding it's head good and proper facing Buriella again. Starian pulls the blindfold off, and almost like that, she returns to flesh and blood, and finishes her shrieking. After a newly onset pounding headache from hearing that, she looks around in bewilderment, before rushing over to the foal.

"Alright, now for my end...." I pick the cockatrice up again, and head out of the cave. Starian watches on, just a bit bewlidered himself. Buriella looks to him.

"You think he'll come back?"

"More than likely, it's nearly dark....."

***

About an hour later, and one crazy adventure that can be told later.....ok, quick hint, roaring is awesome.....I'm back in the cave. Dinner's on the table, vegetable soup. Something about it doesn't seem to sit well with me, not certain exactly what. Maybe it's my body's carnivourous, or maybe it's I've never been a huge fan of veggies. No, it's definitely the bandages on my shoulder, so dang itchy!

Regardless, I dig in, and the food tastes....bland. Don't think Buriella's ever heard of herbs or spices. Eh, I can't complain. They were nice enough to help me after saving them. Plus it's better than going on an empty stomach. So I dig in again.

CRASH!

"It better not be back...I got it." I jump off my pillow and head to the entrance. What greets me is two of those guard pegasi, huddled together, shaking in apparent fear.

"D-did we get away?"

"I....I don't know. That thing was fast....."

I move closer, being as cautious as possible. It's clear they were hurt. One of them had burns on his back, the other had lost a wing, and one foreleg was coated in ice, as well as the area where the wing should be. They were in dire straights, so I turn back to the dining area. "Starian, we got two hurt pegasi here.....don't let Valluran out here...."

My voice shocks the both of them, they turn to look at me, and promptly both faint just as Buriella and Starian come in. She gasps on the sight, while Starian qucikly goes for more medical supplies.

"I'll watch over them, but somepony needs to get some help for them." He looks to me again as he comes back with hisbandages and the like. "I know it's asking a lot, but can you head east about a day's trip? You'll reach Manehatten, but hang on a sec." He stops by one of the guards and pulls a gem out from the bristles on their helmet. "Take this with you, give it to a guard in Manehatten, they'll understand."

Blinking, I take it, and slip it into the band on my hat. But what puzzled me more....he used, somepony....

It hit me like a ton of bricks here. All the names mentioned, all the horse puns. I was in the world of that kids show my brother watches! I just facepaw at the thought. It made way too much sense now. Sighing, I turn to leave. Within a few minutes I'm out of sight of the cave.

The forest around the area looms around, and I See the ropes I left behind when the cockatrice was freed. Who knows, maybe I'll see them again, or not. Manehatten, here I come!

.....

"GRAAAAAAAAAAAAOOOOOOOOOOOOAR!" Seriously, it is fun to do.

Since when could chicken lizards do that!?

View Online

To say traveling at night is a peaceful experience would be a complete lie. Even in a fantasy world such as this, there's still things that go bump in the night. Doesn't help when you are one of those things either. Even so, nothing seems to have shown up, for now. The forest ahead of me is rather calm, much more tranquil than where I began.

Again my stomach growls. Completely dumb of me not to get some food to take along, but those guards are in more need than myself here. So onward I go, stopping occasionally to scale a tree to keep my bearings. Claws make it much easier than I thought it'd be. A few trees though I thought to stay away from. There were gouges in them, and a couple had glowing eyes just floating above them. Funny enough whatever these creatures are, they don't seem to be bothering me.

I soon reach a clearing, and considering how high in the sky the moon is, decide I should rest here. It seems peaceful enough, but still, can't be too cautious. Some quick work on a small little hill in the middle, and I have a mostly camouflaged sleeping space.......Ok so I just gathered some leaves and pressed them around a fallen log hanging over two small hills, sheesh, I'm no architect.

Perhaps a little stargazing is in order. It's hard to do at home, so such a beautiful night, can't waste all of it. I just find a comfortable position next to the log, and scan the sky. Even with a bright moon, the stars themselves are so vivid here. Add in that there's not a cloud in the sky, and it's any astronomist's dream. Just wish I had a telescope or something.

"Here you go." A purple hoof pushes a telescope up next to me. I glance over. It's Cotton Candy.....wait, no her name starts with two P's, right? Eh, doesn't matter. I take the telescope in paw and start looking among the stars themselves. She simply cocks her head a bit. How do I know, I heard the pop of her neck. "What, no surprised reaction?"

"That's the thing about running gags, they stop being surprising after the first few times. They're expected. But I will ask, where'd you get the telescope, stashed nearby?" I pull away for a second to look at her

"Oh, no, a friend let me borrow it." She said with the largest smile I've ever seen. How does a face hold a smile that big?

***

At that moment, a pony in Ponyville was opening the door to her balcony at her library home. There was a big event tonight, and she intended to see it all. What greeted her was a missing telescope, and a note pinned to the balcony.

'Dear Twilight

Sorry, gotta borrow your telescope for something important. Will bring it back by morning, no damage! Pinkie Promise!

Your Friend

P.P.'

Twilight scrunched up the note in a ball of magic. Her wings flared open and she shouted out. "PINKIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

***

"PINKIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

My ears perk up. "What was that?"

"Nothing." She continues to grin.

"Whatever." I just continue to gaze along at the stars, when I spot a few moving. Too slow to be shooting stars. I pull away for a second and adjust it to get a closer look. What comes into view as I put my eye back to the scope astounds me. "Whales......Flying whales......"

"Ooh ooh, lemme see!" She pushes me out of the way rather violently, sending me sprawling on my side. She looks through for but a moment, before awwing like she saw something cute. "Leviathans. I gotta tell Fluttershy about this in the morning."

"Leviathans. They seem, dangerous, and heading this way.... Shouldn't we, I don't know, hide?" I looked back to the skyline, where I could see them with the naked eye now. They were big.....real big. Giant whales....and my mind starts jumping to Pinnochio and Moby Dick.

She merely giggles. "No silly, look closely, you can see a couple pegasi flying with them." She moves away from the telescope, which I look through once more. Sure enough, I see a couple pegasi. One's flying along with a really young looking sky whale. Another's sitting on an older looking one. The one on the older whale, I could swear she had wall eye. Hard to tell, her gray coat blended in well, just her blonde mane gave her away really. The other pegasus, who looked to be hard pressed to keep up with the leviathans, was brown coated, a darker brown mane. Something about him.....

"Well....how do you know they haven't simply gained their trust?" I pulled away again to look at her. She giggles again, and motions to the group of impossibilities.

"Cause Ditzy's my town's mailpony, I saw her earlier today, and she always goes on crazy adventures with the Doctor there."

"Doctor who?"

"No, just the Doctor."

"Oh...wait...." What, is this world converging with all known worlds? Am I going to see Cybermen next? I shake my head. Cotton Candy's gone again, and the telescope with her. I just sit and watch as the group of Leviathans, and their two passengers, fly overhead. It really is a beautiful sight. Once they pass by, I slip into my little made cubby, and fall asleep.

***

My eyes crack open just as the sun begins shining down upon the world. A smile creeps across my face as I pull my way out of my temporary abode. No sharp pain anywhere, I didn't stick myself this time it seems. A quick stretch of everything, and another glance to the sky. Clear blue. Perhaps a good start.

That hope is dashed as I see the clearing. Must have missed it somehow, but there seems to be piles of.....something. I can only imagine the Leviathans are behind these. Moving my way cautiously around, thanking cat like grace at this moment, The forest comes up once again, and a sign as well.

THANK YOU FOR VISITING THE GREAT LEVIATHAN PASSING GROUNDS! REMEMBER, ALL MATERIALS WITHIN ARE PROPERTY OF THE FLIM FLAM BROS., SO NO LEAVING THE AREA WITH ANY CONTAINERS.

Ten minutes later, I'm still standing there, mouth open. Think a fly or two flew down my throat. I, just slept, in a giant public toilet. Whoever these Flim Flam Bros. are, I'm going to strangle them for not putting up a fence. And who wants whale droppings!?

After getting the facepaw out of the way, I'm back on track. A quick climb up to get my bearings, though by this point, I've had enough of forests, you just never know when you'll see something out of the ordinary. Plus I think I hear growling somewhere.

I perk up my ears to try to catch it again. Yeah, definitely growling, and lets see, clucking? When does a chicken run off on it's own in the....the cockatrice! Apparently some big dog or wolf has it cornered. Eh, it's probably going to be fine, one stare and it's safe.

A rather loud screech comes to my ears next, and it definitely sounds like that cockatrice again. It's full steam ahead, and I barrel along. The next clearing comes into view, and what lays before me... Honestly I'm not really surpised, considering everything else in this whacked out place.

What greets my sight is a group of wolves, that literally look like they're made of wood. Planks, branches, leaves, the works. What they surround, is the very cockatrice that was at the cave before, still sporting that little knot of rope I ended up chewing through around it's leg. Every single one of the wolves seems to be advancing on the little guy, and eyes slammed shut. Friggin copycats.

Of course the only one to see me is the cockatrice itself, and the look of fear it has in it's eyes... Well it makes me mad. So, best figured to get their attention, possibly open it up for his defense. I roar out, and the effect is immediate. All the wolves, five by count, turn to face me, and open their eyes.

Seems they got the hint, cause right then the cockatrice bit back, or more stared back. Faster than I could blink it shot infront of a couple of the woody wolves and glared them down, turning them to stone almost immediately.

The other three wolves turn to see this new development. They also got a taste of stoning. Unfortunately I got caught in the gaze as well, and everything blacked out.

***

Everything came back to me in a flash, except for my sense of balance, which decided to take a holiday while i was stoned. Picking myself back up, i'm eye to eye with the lizardy bird once more. First reaction of course is to immediately shut my eyes, but they merely peck me a couple times until I open them again. It's holding it's little wing out.

Taking this as a good sign, I carefully grasp it with a paw, and with that we shook. Really this seemed weird, two mythilogical creatures shaking on an agreement, or friendship, or, what to call it? Heh, I'd ask them if they could talk, but I highly doubt-

"So what now?"

I blinked, did, did it just say something? What, are all creatures in this world sentient? Doesn't explain the behavior of those guards back by that cottage. Evolution? Who knows. All I know is it seems friendly enough, and well, guess I should answer it's question.

"I uhh, still need to get to Manehatten, deliver something." With that I grab my hat and pull out the small gem from the guard's armor. "That family said this needs to get to a guard in Manehatten. Do you know the way at all?"

It gets a closer look at the gem, looking it over before turning and pointing off in the distance. "It's off that way, but they won't let you in. You know how ponies are."

"Err, yeah....those batponies seemed nice enough at least." Really they did, and I was taking a step to help those guards.

"That's only cause they're in the same boat. Ponies are afraid of difference. Still, you're going to need me watching your behind if you're set on heading there." With that it jumps on my back and starts gazing around, possibly keeping an eye out.

"Whoa whoa, hold on. First, what makes you think you and I are gonna travel together? Two, I barely know you, and what I do know doesn't make you exactly trustworthy. Three, you act as if ponies are evil, they didn't exactly treat me with respect, but they didn't outright attack me." My own thoughts wander for just a second. "Come to think of it, you ever tried talking to one of them?"

It sits there for a second before making quite an odd noise, it sounds between a cluck and a laugh. This goes on for a few seconds before it stops and stares at me. "You serious?" I merely nod. "Gees, ok, main reason, I don't speak their language. Second, even if I did, a cockatrice isn't exactly the most reputable of creatures given the circumstances. They believe it's any errant gaze will catch them, I have to focus it."

"Hold on a second, you don't speak their language, then how do I understand you?" Seems a legit question if you ask me.

"Well, quite simply, we're speaking in forest tongue....Well I am anyway, you're speaking theirs. Just cause I don't speak it don't mean I don't understand it!" Great, so trapped in this world, I now know the language of the forest suddenly, and it sounds like english! It just gives me the oddest look until I realize my mouth had been open. "You are the weirdest manticore I've ever met."

"Let's just say the last few days have been the weirdest yet."

"Really, do tell, I enjoy a good story." Clucky, as they'll be called in my head until they actually give me their name, lays down on their stomach, and stares at me. Well, no sense in arguing, so the two of us continue on our journey, with me regaling my entire tale to this moment.


***


"So, lemme get this straght. The crazy pony comes by in a different color paint every time? There's no logic to that!" Clucky flops on their back and stares at the sky. "I mean really, why is that pony so obsessed with you?"

"I'm going to take a wild stab at this, and guess it's cause of something she said when she first showed up, painted pink. A party." We had been going for a good two hours by this point, and my stomach had started growling an hour back. Nothing in view. Guess no food until later.

"OK, seriously, that stomach of yours is giving me a headache, hang on a minute." Clucky jumps off my back and runs into a few nearby bushes. I'm left sitting there, wondering what the heck's going on. Few minutes later, Clucky comes back with a some little statues. "Should tide us over, I only need like two, you can have the rest."

Taking the other five, I get a closer look. Mice. Statues of mice. Doesn't take a genius to figure out clucky hit them all with their stare. "Umm, think you're forgetting something, I can't eat rocks."

"Hmm, oh, hanf on" Clucky swallowed their bite, with it still being a rock, and came over, staring at the mice, and just like that, I had five live mice wriggling about in my paws.

Grimacing, I held one up. OK, if they'd been dead it wouldn't have been a big issue, but living, breathing mice....."I think I just lost my appetite."

Clucky stops their chewing once again and looks at me like I had said something foul. "You, a manticore, with food right in your grip, lost your appetite? What kind of wuss are you? They're just mice, your stomach's growling, so eat!"

"I already told you, I'm not normally this, and I keep mice as pets where I'm from!" Even so, a small part of me was looking at them like they were strips of bacon. Crispy, fatty, little pieces of bacon......

"There you go, beats going hungry." Really Clucky, you're one to talk, at least I haven't eaten any of mine ye- where'd they go? Looking down, there's nothing of the sort...oh crud I did eat them. I just ate mice. Mitzy and Selena are gonna give me all heck about this. Wait what's so worrying, they never need to know, they're just a couple mice in their cage, back home, all alone, with noone to feed them, even if the neighbor was asked t- oww! Clucky was poking my head again. "Equestria to manticore, we should keep moving!"

"Uhh, right, so, off to town then." Well, a light meal in our stomachs, we're all set to go again, so we're off to see the wizard! The wonderful wizard of -DONK!


***

Ok, so apparently making references in your head is grounds for some freaky brick to appear out of nowhere and smack into my face, but these ponies that showed up were rather nice, just asked a couple questions, like what i was thinking about when the brick hit me, and why a cockatrice was traveling with me. Only ponies besides the batponies that didn't freak out seeing us, so I just answered. One of them mentioned something about 6934 being brought in for containment over a radio, but considering It looked like I probably shouldn't have heard that, I kept my mouth shut.

"So, think another brick'll hit ya?" clucky asks, Oh the smell of schadenfruede is strong in the air. We've been going for 3 hours since that happened and Clucky still won't shut up about it.

"Oh give it a rest already, I think it knocked a fang loose." Again a quick flick with my tongue, but it seriously will not give me a valid answer. Is it loose, is it my imagination? Is all this a fever dream that there's no waking up from. What if I was actually mauled by a bear and this is just a coma. If so why base it on a show I barely know about?

"Well fine, sheesh. Lighten up some. Not like anything exciting happens around here anyway." Clucky chuckles at the thought, I merely groan. Statements like that are almost always an invitation for trouble. And almost as if on queue, the ground starts shaking.

Off in the distance, a shape rises from the treelines, and it is huge! Can't tell what it is, it's way too far away, but everything in me is screaming to book it for town. My fears are only affirmed by Clucky whispering in my ear to run. So of course, as any sane individual would do when faced with a beat of unimaginable size and strength, I lost control of my bladder before I took off. It's only once we make it into town that I turn back to look. No sign of it, but as my vision swivels back, oh is that a familiar sight. Guards, with their spears pointed our way. Well, the dungeons weren't that bad....

Prison Blues and Scenic Views

View Online

"Ok, seriously, where'd you get the harmonica, and how the heck are you playing it?"

Well, to be fair, things the last few minutes were a blur. The guards took us off for holding in the nearby station, letting us sit there while we wait for What I'm assuming is something incredibly weird. What weirded me out more right now is the fact Clucky Von Lizardbutt not only snatched a harmonica within that few minutes, but was able to play it like a master blues artist.

"Does it matter, we're not really going anywhere....." Clucky says, setting the magic noise stick down. "Besides, why do you care?"

"Umm, considering you don't appear to have lips and all......"

"Says the weirdo who hasn't got a clue how to be what he is." A smile curled up on her face. Again, lips, lack of, impossibility...... the impression this shouldn't be questioned comes forth. Different reality, different rules. If a cockatrice can exist, hey let it be able to and know how to play a harmonica. Clucky taps me again. "But if you really must know, heard tale some mare once hid harmonicas all over Equestria, for prison blues emergencies. Happened to find this one."

Next thing I know my vision is obscured, and my face hurts. I'm not sure why, but upon hearing such a stupid idea, My face had subconsciously decided to have a speed date with the floor. I don't know if they'll see each other again. Grounds cold, flat, and gets walked all over, and my face is soft, sensitive, and gets hurt easy.

We weren't in the there very long however. Well, as far as I know. I got turned to stone for about 2 hours after i kinda attacked Clucky in a mild rage. She only let me free when she heard a pony coming. Well, actually, two ponies and a certain evil mind painy freak of nature. I felt my mind slowly twisting again just seeing this guy. Course he's the one who's the first to say something.

"Well hello, fancy meeting you here, just like last time....but oh look, yuo have a friend on the other side this time!" He slips a note to the guard, who upon seeing it, goes wide-eyed. Ok, what could get them to freak out? The big guy snaps his fingers, and something falls in my face. Picking it up, I look it over.

"By Royal Decree, the Manticore known as Mark, currently being held in the Manehatten Police Dept., has been found not guilty of all charges put against him, with exception to the one count of prison break, from one Royal Canterlot Dungeons. By suggestion from His Lordship, Discord, Mark's sentence will be directed personally by Same. Mark is to be released into Discord's custody.

HRH

Princess Celestia

P.S. Informally, to the guard, if Discord so much as causes an iota of destruction during his visit to Manehatten....." I stop there, and big, tall and ugly glares a bit.

"Well, didn't expect an informal bit at the end there.....but you and I shall go get a bit more acquainted." He snaps his fingers again, causing the door to flip open. "Don't see a problem taking the cockatrice either." The guard seems a bit flabbergasted, though the other pony almost saw this coming from the looks of it. Without a word we all leave, though i do leave the gem from the armor aside on the counter on the way out.

***

Walking through town is one thing. Walking through it as a manticore while ponies all around me give us weird looks is another. But I seriously draw the line when the snake like dufus decides I'm a couch! I've had to shake him off countless times, yet again and again he keeps hopping back on. It's perfect every time, how!? He's just smirking, poking his head into my vision every once in a while.

"Relax, and quit knocking me off, this is part of your punishment. Now....ONWARD NOBLE STEED!" A collective sound of hooves smacking into faces surrounds us.

I just move faster, and hope noone follows us. That other pony, the one that came in with the guard, and he who thinks he's a cowboy, kept staring at me. That look, seemed a bit....odd. Plus the fact he seemed recognizable. Green with a horn, and dark green hair with red streaks.

***

Elsewhere, a certain alabaster unicorn shivered. She could almost sense, somewhere, out there, was a pony with horrid green hair.

***

"Hey!" A voice says, from right behind my ear. Problem one, it didn't sound like snake butt. Problem two, I recognized it as somepony else. Turning, who's in my face but Cotton Candy again, this time.....ok seriously now that's trying too hard. Every color of the rainbow in a constant pattern down her body. "You made Rarity act all cold! What did I say in chapter three about doing stuff like that?" Wait, was she in my mane!?

Sure enough, she's half sticking out of it. Which in all throws her previous method of transportation into question. So I'm standing there with my mouth open trying to catch flies, while freakshow slides off of me and huddles with Cotton Candy.

"Pinkie, you can't reference chapters or anything related to story or the author despite how chaotically fun it is. Others just aren't ready yet. Remember what happened to Twilight when you showed her the season one dvd? Give it time though, they will be ready soon enough."

"Aww ok Discy! But shouldn't your changeling buddy there let Mark know who he is yet?"

"Wait, the green one's a changeling?" Discord says, swiveling his head like an owl to look.

My head shakes, I know I heard changeling somewhere, but where....the guards outside the forest! My head turns to the green one, who looks at me at me like I've got something stuck in my teeth.

"Bro, you got a bit of fur stuck on your fang." That voice....really, that voice. Again, my head shakes before I inch closer to him. "Seriously, it looks weird."

"Just who are you? Cause in all truth, you and I barely know each other, we just met. I don't like you calling me bro." This point there's a snarl in my voice. Why This is so infuriating I'll never know, maybe it's cause he looks familiar, maybe it's cause he sounds like my brother......wait.. "Evan?"

"In the fur Bro! Well, maybe not fur, but you'll see in a sec-Hey what the!?" Snake boy....no, I'll just call him whatever name the letter said, Discord had just shot up to us and grabbed Evan off his feet, err, hooves, whatever.

"You said you were the brother, the other that slipped through unintentionally when I asked you. If you lied to me...oh so help me I'll-" Evan stops him right there, holding up the letter. Where'd he get a copy?

"Cool your jets Discord, Don't wanna make Celestia mad. Second, I said I was, I just never said this is what I came through looking as. Now, If you don't mind." Discord glares at him for a few seconds, before setting him down.

"Fine, but let's be off, shall we?" With a snap he's gone....and I suddenly feel heavier. Oh look, he's on my back again. With a sigh we head on our way again, leaving a rainbow colored crazy mare to watch us, not moving an inch


***

One last heave, and we're inside my brother's temporary pad. I collapse on the floor, panting, wheezing, feeling like I ran a marathon with a weight on my back....which in fact I did, cause Discord insisted on the scenic route, and going as fast as possible. Ok yeah the bit with the jet engine he turned into was fun, but the rest sucked!

"Well, that was refreshing." Oh now the fucking serpent decides I don't need to bear his weight. Who put this idiot in charge of my sentencing? Wait, right, the princess, and this bozo's a lord. I look up just in time to see him snap that eagle claw, and bam, suddenly the room's dark and I'm sitting in a chair with a bright light in my face.

"What is this, an interrogation?" Enough times at the movies and you start expecting things before they happen.

"No. What gave you that idea? I figured you needed a tan." Another snap and it's now all turned into a bounce house. I dig my tail into the floor, trying to keep myself from flying everywhere. It doesn't help.

"Stop, stop it! I can't take it!" Curiousity makes me wonder just how much he actually heard as I zipped by his line of sight from bouncing so much. Another snap, everything returns to normal, except suddenly there's a legband on my left foreleg. "W-what the heck is this?"

"While you're under your sentencing you'll take the form I choose for you. The legband will keep that going without me needing to concentrate. At least, that's how it was explained...."

***
the previous day
***

"Hello Twilight!" Discord said, letting himself into her private lab in the ponyville library basement. Already he was floating over her.

"What is it now Discord?" She was poking and prodding at a small legband she was working on, charging bits and pieces with magic. "I'm busy putting the finishing touches on this."

"Oh and what might that be?" Something piqued his curiosity, let's not startle the draconeques. A silent shush was put in the air towards a wall.

"Who are you shushing?"

"Oh nopony."

"Well, anyway, it's a legband designed to constantly maintain whatever spell put in it and constantly cast it on the wearer. Cloudwalking spell, transformation, levitation, wing spell, you name it."

"Fascinating...." He smirks, a bright idea hitting him. "Princesswholetsmefieldtestitsayswhat!"

"What?"

"THANK YOU!" He snatches it up and promptly disappears. Twilight looks back at where he was, then to the table, and back and forth a couple times until Her mane bursts into flames and she roars out.

"DISCOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORD!"

***

With that another snap, and suddenyl I feel, wrong. A mirror sprouts out of the ground. The image it portrays is horrifying. I was a pony, but not a normal one. I look like I'd been dipped in acid, and my skin settled in horrible ways. It also looked like I had a pipboy, but it was held on by stretches of more skin attached to it. Lastly, every time I breathed out, there was a little puff of pink smoke. "Hmm, doesn't seem chaotic enough to me."

Evan pipes up then. "Discord are you nuts? Well, nuttier than normal!? You can't make him into one of those. That cloud he's breathing out alone is deadly toxic!"

"Hmm, suppose you're right." Another snap, I was swapped to a mouse. "No, too small." Snap. A lavender colored unicorn stallion....with pegasus wings. "No, too rule sixty three." Snap. An octopus. "Too hentai." Snap. Back to manticore. "Perfect"

"He started as that....." Evan just facepalms, facehoof's, didn't I question which it'd be earlier?

"Hmm.....AHA!" One final snap, and what greets me now is one of those batwinged ponies. Only I kept the extra long mane, and my tail was scorpion like still. That and the fangs were more pronounced. "Just take one part away and boom, perfect!" Gotta say, I looked kinda nice, for a freak of nature.

"Ok, ok, so that's out of the way, now what, and where have you been Evan?" All this time, getting easily sidetracked from finding him, and now that I found him, I realized how little I tried.

"Well, Mark, you remember that buggy looking pony in the forest back when you first woke up here? That umm, was me." The next thing I know, he's consumed in green fire, leaving me jumping back and falling on my ass. The fires drop, and there's the buggy pony. "I kinda came through as a Changeling. I thought I told you about these guys."

"Yeah well I didn't exactly expect a little girl's show to be based on reality! So cut me some freaking slack."

"Ahem." We both whirl towards Discord. "If you two are quite finished, there's a few other matters we need to go over, but first." He pops away to the window, slaps it open and pulls a pony through. It's Cotton Candy, still covered in rainbow paint. "Pinkie, I believe something is due finally."

The widest smile I've ever seen spreads across her face, and she literally starts vibrating in the middle of the room, chips of paint falling away until it's all gone, leaving a pink colored pony in it's wake. Well, there goes my guess, her name wasn't Cotton Candy. That fact has little time to register before I realize she suddenly has a cannon pointed at my face. Before I can scream, she fires it off, and i'm coated in a combination of streamers, confetti, cake, and other various decorations and party favors. A banner now hangs over me, saying, 'Welcome to Equestria Mark and Evan.' Well, a party, I can live with that. But one things bother me.

"Uhh, Pinkie, how long were you sitting out there?"

"Since you left for the scenic route." The most innocent smile on her face, no way she's lying. I pop over to the window, look out, sure enough, the same road we left her on.

"So you mean, the whole time, this place was right around the corner?" She nods to me, and well, the next few minutes I don't recall, though Evan explained to me that I tried to murder Discord with any object I could get my hooves on.

And so the party wiled away, with me eventually sitting in the corner, tied up in a straight jacket and muzzled, glaring daggers at Discord as he became one with the dancefloor, which was quite literally on a few occasions.