Part 1: "Do you even care about archeology at all?"

Previously, on My Little Pony...

Rarity sat on the edge of an extravagant veiled bed and gazed down at the gleaming young prince as he lay sleeping. She hovered over him anxiously, watching for the slightest sign of wakefulness. His coat gleamed with a steely grain and his long mane sparkled like a wave of silver blades. Despite his formidable visage, he was thin and youthful... his face had an aristocratic look, and he wore large, bookish spectacles with one cracked lens. His metal facade did nothing to hide the warmth and softness of a living body... for Prince Gallium was a member of the Crystal Empire's nobility. One of the last, in fact.

You've been asleep for so long, Rarity thought as she dabbed a moist cloth against his forehead. Rest a little longer and everything will be set right again... I promise.

The door opened and slammed shut in rapid succession, and Rarity looked back across the bedroom: Applejack and Pinkie Pie were frantically upending expensive crystal-carved furniture in front of the double doors.

"What's going on?" said Rarity. "You were supposed to keep her busy!"

"Mighty sorry," Applejack said, "but there's just no talkin' to that mare. She ain't exactly the patient sort."

Pinkie Pie took out a power drill and began fastening metal slabs against the door frame. "I tried everything!" she said, "the fireworks, the wrapped presents, the dessert buffet... she didn't even notice any of it! I worked so hard to throw her a welcome-back party, and she refused to even look at the pin-the-tail-on-the-pony game!"

Rarity stared, shocked, at Applejack. "What have you done!? You promised to remember your manners!"

"We didn't get a chance!" Applejack shouted back. "She burst right through the front door and immediately started swingin' a lance around! She didn't even give us a chance to speak our minds!"

"But Rainbow Dash isn't back yet," Rarity said. "We need more time! We need to—"

A deafening impact blasted against the other side of the door. The makeshift barricade of furniture shuddered, and the screws in the metal slats rattled loose slightly. They could hear a voice on the far side, shouting furiously.

Applejack shot Rarity a look. "There ain't no more time. It's now or never."

Rarity bit her lower lip and glanced about the room, trying to ignore the relentless quaking of the battering ram. She slid off the edge of the bed and stood up. "Stay by the door, and get ready to surprise her. I'll make one last effort to talk some sense into her."

Applejack and Pinkie Pie did as they were told. Seconds later, the door exploded open in a shower of broken furniture and splintered crystal. A silhouette charged through the dust, standing tall and proud: the mare was half again their height and clad in a full coat of gleaming armor that had been carved whole out of giant gems. There was a massive crystal lance hitched to her side, made of the same hardened stone. She flipped up her visor to reveal the shimmering face of a crystal pony... an elegant beauty marred by a scowl of intense fury.

"You dare enter my home?" she spat. "You dare intrude on the resting place of my beloved prince!?"

Rarity tried to match the knight's stance, despite the flutter in her stomach. "Delilah, please! You must listen to reason! Your beloved is—"

"Me? Listen to a pack of lowly thugs such as yourselves!?" Delilah reared up on her hind legs, then slammed her front hooves on the floor. The stamp sent a shudder throughout the entire tower. "I will run you through and trample you into dust for this impertinence!"

Rarity stepped forward and shook her head. "No, please! You don't understand!"

Without another word, Delila lowered her lance into position and charged towards her. Applejack dove at her crosswise and twisted around at the last moment, slamming both hind hooves against Delilah's side. The impact rang against her armor like a giant bell and Applejack tumbled back from the recoil, yet Delilah's stance barely shifted at all.

"You would strike at me from the shadows?" Delilah roared. "Such cowards!"

Pinkie Pie loaded the last of a series of creme-pie catapults. "Hey, we tried doing this the friendly way! You won't even let us help you when you need it the most!"

"Help? How could you possibly help the indomitable Diamond Duchess!? You cannot imagine the quests I have undertaken!"

Pinkie Pie grabbed the trigger rope in her mouth and gave it a yank.

"Brilliant Cut!" the Duchess cried out with the piercing, clarion tone of an opera singer. She swept her lance sideways with blinding speed: an arc of coherent light sliced through each of the catapults completely, and cleaved through the heavily fortified wall behind them. When the arc faded from view, they saw Pinkie Pie pressing herself flat against the floor with the uppermost parts of her mane and tail shaved flat.

"You call yourself a duchess?" Rarity called out. "A real member of the nobility would listen to reason!"

"Reason?" Delilah spit on the floor and fixed her with a hateful glare. "You trespass in my tower, you insult my honor, and you threaten my beloved prince? There can be no reason for what you have done!"

Rarity glanced briefly at the window, hoping to catch a glimpse of Rainbow Dash's brightly colored mane in the distance.... no such luck. "And what of your actions?" She shouted. "You've waged a one-pony war against your own kingdom! How many wizardly vaults have you plundered? How many academies and libraries have you laid to waste?"

The Diamond Duchess stamped an armored hoof. "Those artifacts are mine by right! My need of them is greater than you can imagine!"

"Oh, we know exactly what you need them for... and I think you're nothing but a vain and selfish old mare! All you care about is yourself!"

"How dare you!"

Delilah lowered her head to charge once more, But Rarity's horn flared with a magic spell. A bolt of royal purple light streaked out at the Duchess and reflected off her gemstone body like a mirror, returning to strike Rarity dead center. She gasped as her own spell pulled the veils off the bed and yanked the curtains from the window, entrapping her in a giant knot of silken cloth.

"Fool!" the Duchess said. "You know nothing of the Crystal Pony's true nature!"

Applejack cleared her throat. The Duchess turned to look, and saw Applejack kick at a nearby bucket and mop: the bucket landed on her head, and she clinched the mop against her shoulder like a lance.

"Ah think that's enough chatter from ya'll. Why don't we settle this proper like?"

"A challenge?" she sneered. "Far be it from me to decline. Prepare yourself, whelp!"

The two mares reared up and charged towards each other, weapons at the ready. Applejack's mop-handle glanced off the Duchess's chestplate, while her opponent's pure diamond lance missed its mark completely.

"Well well well!" Applejack chuckled. "Looks like somepony's a mite rusty! You sure you don't want to do a few practice rounds first?"

Rarity bit her lower lip. Sweet Celestia's mane... she thinks she's doing well.

Delila snorted, and charged again. This time, Applejack's mop missed its target and Delilah's lance struck true: the tip shattered Applejack's makeshift bucket helm into splinters and went on to miss her head by a hair's breadth. Applejack skidded to a halt and touched her forehead in shock. She looked back, and saw the Diamond Duchess grimly turning around for a third pass.

"Lan' sakes," Applejack whispered. "What have I gotten myself into?"

Applejack swallowed hard, readied her mop, and charged one last time.

"Cannonbaaaaaall!"

A nearby stained glass window shattered apart as Rainbow Dash burst into the bedroom, tucking into a mid air somersault as she came to a halt. Her spectacular entrance distracted the Duchess for just an instant, but Applejack remained focused: the end of her mop struck dead center and shattered her opponent's ornate crystal breastplate in two.

Delilah skidded to a halt, desperate to cover herself up as the front of her armor disintegrated. "No! No!"

Rainbow Dash held up an shining crystal bottle. "Hey, girls! Sorry I'm late. It took Twilight forever to figure out all the alchemical stuff."

Delilah gasped in shock. "The Miracle Medicine!"

Applejack pointed at the bed. "The prince is right over there! Give it to him!"

The Duchess swiped her lance at Rainbow Dash, but she dodged the wild swings easily.

"That medicine is mine! I've spent the last century questing for a cure! I must have it!"

Rainbow Dash whipped through the air, with the Duchess in hot pursuit. With mere seconds to spare, she popped the cork and splashed the contents all over the sleeping Prince Gallium. "One wakeup call, coming right up!"

The bedroom flooded with a cascade of light and warmth. The Prince's body glowed from within, and shafts of light flooded from his eyes as they opened. They all watched in awe, but none were quite so stunned as the Duchess herself: she stared, utterly transfixed, as her beloved stallion awakened.

The light faded abruptly, and the prince fell back onto the bed. He stretched his back and cricked his neck before looking around the room. "Oh... oh, I say. What a peculiar..." He paused to look at the cracked lens of his spectacles, then promptly took an undamaged pair from his coat pocket. "...What a peculiar dream. Where am I? Who are you strange ponies?"

Before any of them could answer, Delilah spun away and covered her face with her hooves. "No! Don't look at me! You mustn't!"

Gallium's eyes focused. His expression sharpened. "Delilah? Duchess Delilah!?"

Her tears dripped to the floor. "No please... don't look!"

Gallium stood up and approached her regardless. He touched her chin and turned her to face him. Rarity, Applejack, and Pinkie Pie all gasped as they saw her without her frontal plate armor: there was a deep fracture that ran through her translucent body like a ribbon, down through her neck and all the way to where her heart would be, if she had been an earth pony.

"Delilah... it is you!"

"I didn't want you to see me... not like this. I couldn't bear the thought of being broken and ugly."

Gallium adjusted his spectacles. "I remember, now... you ran away, years ago."

"Centuries," Rarity said, kicking herself free from the last of the knotted veils. "She loved you dearly but believed you could never be together. It finally broke her heart, and she put you to sleep centuries ago so she would have time to search for a cure."

Applejack shook her head. "And it's been even longer, if'n you figure that the Crystal Empire just plain disappeared for more than a thousand years. You've both been gone an awful long time."

"Why?" Gallium whispered. "Why didn't you just tell me the truth? What possible reason could there be for us to stay apart?

"You are a prince," she said, "and I am merely a duchess... we could never be married. I thought if you saw me like this, scarred and ugly, that you'd have no desire to even visit me. I wanted to be pretty again... for you."

"Delilah, you should be pretty for your own sake. Not for somepony else." The Prince stepped close and touched her cheek. "And besides, I'm a prince: I can marry whoever I want. And most importantly of all, I don't care how you look. I loved you because you were brave and strong and just."

Her eyes widened. "You did!?"

"I still do," he said. "And besides... you are pretty. Even as you are, I think you're the most beautiful mare in the empire."

She gazed into his eyes, lost in the moment. Without warning, Pinkie Pie popped up beside them and hugged them both close.

"Aww! You know what this calls for? Cinnamon marble-loaf! There's a whole buffet waiting downstairs! Whaddya say?"

Prince Gallium nudged his spectacles up. "I am feeling a little snacky. Is there lemonade?"

"What kind of question is that? Of course there is!"

"But... but... how!?" the Duchess shook her head. "How did you ponies find the Miracle Medicine? I've spent over a hundred years questing for it, and I never even got close!"

Rainbow Dash cleared her throat. "While we were investigating your crazy rampage, we just happened to find a certain Prince's private library, where we just happened to find an alchemy lab... that just happened to have a machine that makes Miracle Medicine. It took Twilight a little longer than we expected to get it working, and Fluttershy took forever to find all the special ingredients in the Sapphire Forest... and of course, I had to fly it here as fast as I could. I think we did a pretty good job, considering."

"You've gotta believe us," said Applejack, "The prince was workin' on a cure for you ever since the day you left!"

Delilah turned to him. "You were?"

"Actually..." The prince opened his coat and took a bottle from an inside pocket, identical to the one Rainbow Dash had brought. "That's why I visited your tower in the first place. But you put me to sleep before I could say even a single word."

She stared at the bottle, bewildered. "You mean you had it with you all this time? Right here!?"

The Prince shrugged. "You've really got to let me finish my sentences more often."

Delilah turned around and gave the four ponies a sheepish look. "All this time I've been such a fool... you all worked so hard to bring us together, and I gave you nothing but grief. Can you ever forgive me?"

Pinkie Pie nodded. "Of course! Just promise to loosen up a little, and have fun every now and then."

Rarity walked towards her, levitating the broken halves of her once-magnificent armor. "You were a great and noble hero, once: the 'Indomitable Diamond Duchess' was known far and wide as the bravest defender the Crystal Empire has ever known."

"And they'll need you now more than ever," Applejack said, "what with all the dangers that keep poppin' up on your doorstep. I jest know they'll be happy to see you're back to your old self again."

"Thank you," Delilah said. "Oh, thank you all so much! I never should have judged you poorly because of your opacity. Please, name your reward—anything at all—and I swear it shall be yours!"

Applejack took off her straw hat and held it against herself. "Aw, shucks. We were happy to do it."

Rainbow Dash did one last mid air flip before landing on the floor "We're not in this for the reward. It's what we do!"

"You're absolutely sure?” said Delilah. "Surely there must be something I can offer you."

Rarity stepped forward and bowed her head formally. "All we ask is that when you return to the Crystal Empire's royal court, please look upon the land of Equestria as an ally."

"And a friendly neighbor," Applejack said. "If you ever need a cup of sugar, or anything else, don't hesitate to come knockin'!"

The two crystal ponies shared a look, then offered the mares a bow in return.

"Your generosity is a sign of both honor and nobility," said Prince Gallium. "The Crystal Empire may be slow to make new friends, but it never forgets them."

There was a moment of quiet as they all looked at each other.

Rainbow Dash tilted her head and stroked her chin. "...Hey."

"Yes?" said Delilah.

Dash pointed at the vial. "That stuff can cure anything, right? Anything at all?"

"The Miracle Medicine can restore any malady of the mind, body or spirit," Gallium said. "It is a mystical elixir without parallel."

"And all you have to do is pour it on somepony...?" Dash stroked her chin again. "So is that bottle up for grabs? I mean, if you don't need it anymore—"

Rarity shot her a glance. "Dash, this is no time to be greedy."

Delilah turned to the Prince. "You said before that you still find me beautiful just as I am. Was that the truth?"

"Absolutely," he said. "Without a doubt."

Delilah took the bottle and passed it to Dash with a smile. "Then here is your reward. I pray that it brings joy and health to somepony you love."

Dash hopped up and did a midair somersault. "Score!"

"But you must use it wisely," said Gallium. "I can always make more, but the process is very time consuming. It is a limited resource."

"Yeah yeah," Dash said, "I got it already."

Applejack cleared her throat. "...Dash? What do you have in mind?"

"Oh, don't you worry about it... I know exactly where this is going to end up."

Derring-Do rushed about her cluttered loft apartment, stepping over stacks of old newspapers and piles of old laundry as she searched. She snatched up a set of keys, a wallet, and a little black book and stuffed them in a small designer purse. She rushed to her dresser table and looked in the faded, dusty mirror, taking yet another moment to examine her outfit: she was wearing a pleated grey dress with green accents, clinched around the waist with a formal corset-saddle. Her wide-brimmed bonnet was edged with fine lace and had a dark green ribbon tied around it. She leaned close to the mirror and checked her makeup: a faint layer of rose-pink lipstick, some understated eyeliner, and a modest puff of blush on each cheek. The ensemble was formal and modest, but did a good job of accenting her natural colors: it was almost impossible to find a seamstress who could do anything at all with a khaki-mustard coat and a grayscale mane.

A loud ringing came in through the window, and Derring-Do rushed over to look: the cobblestone streets of Canterlot were crowded with both carriages and ponies, and the local citizens were all dressed in traditional Canterlot fashion. She saw one carriage in particular parked in front of the building: a uniformed stallion stepped down from the coach seat and waved up at her, then tapped a hoof against the empty space on his ankle where a watch might be worn.

She waved back at him, snatched an attaché case from the couch and ran for the exit as quickly as she could without ripping her dress. She climbed down the rickety, claustrophobic stairwell and came out into the first floor of the bookbinder's shop beneath her apartment. The coach stallion was already inside and waiting for her.

"Terribly sorry, Rosewood," she said, "the dress was late coming back from the cleaners."

"We are going to be on time!" he said. "One cannot be merely on time for the university's annual charity dinner! Anything less than half an hour early is an insult!"

"I know!" she snapped. "You said the same thing last year, and the year before that!"

She rushed to the exit, but Rosewood stopped her before she could move past him: he adjusted her bonnet and re-tied the ribbon completely, then fluffed the ruffles around her shoulders.

"There. Now give me a smile."

She smiled at him.

He winced. "I told you to practice in the mirror! You've worked in a university for thirteen years and you still haven't learned to smile convincingly?"

She let out an exasperated groan. "It's on my to-do list! Do you have a speech for me?"

He passed her a folded up piece of paper. "And don't lose it: it's the only copy I have on me. You'll just have to memorize it on the way. "

"It's barely even ten lines," she muttered, "and I probably won't even need it. Honestly... all this fuss for nothing."

"It's not nothing," said Rosewood. "The entire administration is attending this charity dinner. The Dean is going to be there to speak about our project itinerary for the entire upcoming year. There's even a rumor that somepony's being considered for tenure! You can't afford to just call in sick for those sorts of announcements!"

Derring sighed. "I know, I know. Let's just get this over with."

Rosewood left the storefront and held the door open as Derring stepped out, and a sky-blue pony with a rainbow-colored mane tumbled out from behind the carriage and threw a water balloon directly at Derring's face. She stood stock still, eyes wide, as icy-cold liquid dribbled down her neck and soaked into her dress.

"Guess what?" Rainbow Dash said. She reared up on her hind legs and pointed both forelegs at her. "You just got Miracle Medicined!"

"What?"

Dash dropped down on all fours again and brushed her hoof casually against the front of her chest. "I know, I know... no need to thank me. It's all in a day's work for your biggest fan ever!"

Derring squinted at the pegasus. "Have we met? Rainbow... Splash, was it?"

"Rainbow Dash, actually." She let out a giggle. "Hey, I guess I really am Rainbow Splash today! Get it? Splash?"

Derring stared at her blankly.

Dash stepped close, smiling broadly. "It wasn't just a water balloon... it was full of Miracle Medicine! It cures what ails ya, body, mind and spirit! Your wing will be working again by the end of the day! You'll be able to fly again, and you can stop being such a horrible, cranky grouch all the time!"

Derring's brow furrowed slightly. She looked back at her own right side, and a faint look of wonder crept over her face. By now a small crowd had paused to watch the sopping wet mare.

"Well you're not gonna be able to fly with that ridiculous getup! Who wears a saddle over their wings, anyways?" Rainbow Dash ran over and pulled at Derring's corset saddle, ripping the dress in several places and exposing her right side to public view: the crippled limb was bound with bright white bandages to keep it from flopping about. Dash ripped the bandages off completely, and Derring glanced about with embarrassment as the crowd gawked and gasped at her disability.

"Who cares what they think?" Dash said. "Go on! Try and move it!"

Derring looked at her with a strange mixture of anger and fear. Eventually, she tensed her body with effort and scrunched her eyes tight.

"There ya go," Dash said. "Don't give up! Don't—"

Derring let out a cry of pain and her broken wing twitched like a dying thing. She fell to the ground and laid on her side, desperate to relieve the pressure. The crowd gasped and retreated a step.

"No-no-no," Dash said, "it's fine, it's fine. It's like a muscle cramp... you just need to work the kinks out. Here, lemme—"

Dash took hold of her wing and forcefully unsheathed it. This time, Derring's cry was a blood-curdling scream of utter agony: her pupils shrank to tiny dots and she thrashed about on the ground violently.

Dash pulled back. "Oh... wow. Yeah, this'll take a little more time than I thought. You know, I'm a registered athletic therapist. If you give me a month or so, I'm sure I could—"

Derring-Do looked up at her. She was gasping for breath and streaked with tears, but her face was twisted with hate and fury. "If you ever touch me again, I will trample you within an inch of your life, do you hear me!? An inch!!"

Rainbow Dash frowned at her. "Do you know what I had to go through to fill that water baloon? You could at least say thanks!"

Even from a prone position, Derring-Do leaped upright in a blink. She let out a furious scream and swiveled her whole body around to deliver a roundhouse kick with both of her hind legs. Dash had scarcely a moment to look dumbfounded before the kick connected: she sailed through the air and crashed through the plate glass window of a fine furniture shop across the street. Flashing stars and chirping birds obscured her senses for a few moments, and then everything faded to darkness.

A few minutes later, Derring-Do and Rainbow Dash lay on a pair of cots on opposite sides of a barred cell in Canterlot's Royal Police station. They both stared at the bars for several minutes, bitter and silent. Rainbow Dash's eye was ringed by a brightly colored bruise, and Derring-Do's formal outfit was torn and ripped. The officers had allowed her to re-bind her crippled right wing, but had confiscated her purse and attache case.

They watched as a pair of uniformed royal guards walked down the corridor, checking the rows of empty cells. Voices drifted in from the front office, too quiet to make out.

Derring-Do ran a hoof back along her mane, but it did nothing to smooth out the untidy mess their scuffle had caused. "Creamy zucchini orecchiette," she muttered.

Rainbow Dash sniffed slightly and scratched her nose.

"Parmesan polenta steaks, with heirloom tomato-corn salad." Derring paused to untie her bonnet and examine it's crumpled top. "Al forno conchiglie with five cheeses... chilled ginger-mango soup... four-year-old peach cider..."

Dash scowled at her. "Is that all you can think about? A fancy dinner? Do you even care about archeology at all?"

Derring threw her bonnet to the floor and leapt across the room, tackling Rainbow Dash with alarming ferocity. They grappled together until they fell to the floor, at which point Derring began throttling her.

"I was supposed to sit between the Mayor of Manehattan and the Gryphon Diplomat from the Towering Isles! You've ruined my career, you ignorant, addlepated nincompoop! Do you hear me? Ruined!"

She continued to bobble Dash's head back and forth, even as the royal guards unlocked the cell doors and rushed to pull them apart.

Author's Notes:

This story follows the events of "Biased and Incomplete". As a one-shot, I was convinced that it had no need of a sequel. However, ideas have a way of stubbornly sticking in the mind and (as all writers know) the only way to exorcize them completely is to put them on paper. This continuation will address many of the issues that were left unanswered in the original, but adds a healthy dose of action and adventure.

This will be the first time I've submitted an unfinished story, and I'll be posting new parts approximately whenever I feel like it. The chapters are short and quick to facilitate rapid consumption, and I promise the story has a concrete ending planned out in advance. Thank you for reading, and please let me know what you think in the comments.

And for those you wondering about the title: Of course she dies at the end.

Part 2: "All my life, it feels like I've been running in place..."

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Derring Do lay on her cot, staring at Rainbow Dash in the cell across from hers. They'd locked eyes for the last hour straight without so much as a breath to break the silence. They could hear muffled voices and shuffling paper from the office, and every so often a pair of royal guards walked down the hall between them. As near as Derring could tell, all the other cells were unoccupied. They probably hadn't been used in months... crime was almost unheard of in Canterlot.

A royal guard approached the bars and nodded to Rainbow Dash. "We managed to contact your friend, and she's agreed to post bail. As soon as the funds are transferred we can clear you for release."

"Thank you, sir."

The guard left them alone, and Dash turned back to Derring. "You don't have any money, do you? Why didn't you call someone?"

Derring remained quiet.

"There must be someone in this whole city who would pay to set you free. Even just one person." Dash tilted her head. "So I'm guessing... you don't want to be seen asking for help. Or you don't want to owe someone a favor."

Dash glanced down each end of the central corridor.

"You know, it's okay to ask for help. It's not a sign of weakness or anything."

Derring worked her jaw back and forth, grinding her teeth.

"So that's it," Dash said.

"Don't talk to me," Derring said. "Don't look at me... don't touch me... don't ever visit me again as long as you live."

Dash rolled her eyes. "...What a drama queen."

"Drama...!?" Derring's eyebrow shot up. "You humiliated me in front of an entire crowd of strangers. You threw a water balloon in my face—

"It was Miracle Medicine," Dash said. "Not water."

—you tore my dress apart... a rental dress that costs more than the building I live in!"

"Okay already! Geez!"

"And then! Then you had the appalling nerve to make fun of my wing... a crippling disability that's plagued me for years! You made an absolute mockery of me in public, all for some twisted, sadistic prank!"

Dash looked back at her, alarmed. "It wasn't a prank! I swear, that medicine was supposed to cure anything! I was only trying to—"

"Only trying to help!?" Derring tossed her head and scoffed. "Are you a doctor? Are you a pharmacologist? Do you know what kind of medication I'm allergic to? Did you even have that liquid examined by a doctor or a chemist? For all you knew, it could have been poison or acid!"

Dash recoiled sheepishly. "Well, my friend made it. She's a... well, a pretty good alchemist. Probably."

"Your friend made it? Oh, what marvelous credentials. Simply smashing." Derring pursed her lips and spoke in a mocking tone. "Oh, it's quite all right! My friend made it!"

Dash's lower lip quivered. "Hey, don't make fun of my friend!"

"You administered a medical treatment to me without asking for my permission! A medicine that didn't work as expected!" Derring stood up and turned around, slumping on the cot and facing away from her. "Well I've had quite enough of that already!"

Dash watched her for awhile.

"Derring-Do?"

Derring grunted.

"I'm sorry," Dash said. "What I did was wrong. I was only trying to make everything better... but that's no excuse."

Derring said nothing. After a moment, her shoulders began to shake.

"Miss Do? Are you okay?"

"Eight months," Derring said, her voice quavering. "I still remember when they rushed me out of the dig site and took me to a hospital. I'd been feverish with malaria for two days straight... I remember waking up and seeing myself in the mirror, with my hair all grey and faded, like an old mare's. I remember the doctor who told me my wing would never work again. I remember his face, his voice... I remember everything about him, like it was yesterday." She gazed up at something beyond the walls of the cell. "It took me eight months just to get out of the hospital. There were so many doctors after that, so many treatments and medicines... I went in for surgery five times a year, and it always took a month of physical therapy just to recover. One whole month of torture, just to learn how to walk again."

Derring slumped back on the bed.

"Running in place," she whispered. "All my life, it feels like I've been running in place... and I have to run faster and faster, just to stay where I am."

"I wasn't kidding about being a registered physical therapist," said Dash. "I know how much it can hurt."

Derring turned to her, suddenly bitter. "I hate you. I hate doctors and hospitals and medicine and surgery... I hate them all! Again and again they give me hope, and tell me not to give up... just hang on a little further, and everything will be better soon! But they never deliver!"

Dash shook her head. "No, you can't give up! You can't ever give up hope!"

Derring Shot to her feet and slammed a hoof against the bars. "Don't even try to feed me such garbage, because I'm not swallowing it! Not one more mouthful! They always say things will get worse before they get better, but that's not how it goes! That's not how the real world works! Sometimes things just get worse, and then they stay that way forever!"

Dash set her jaw. "You're a professor. An archeologist. You've published books and found ancient ruins and... and... everything! Derring, you do what most ponies can only dream of!"

Derring slumped back onto her cot.

"Come on, Derring! Think about everything you've accomplished!"

"I know," she said. "Filling out forms, alphabetizing magazines, sitting behind a desk..." She let out a laugh that was partly a wet sniffle. "I mean, who... who wouldn't want my life? Living in a filthy attic, eating nothing but barley broth and tea... scrimping and saving on laundry money all year to rent a fake dress and a fake carriage, just to have dinner with a bunch of rich ponies. It's my one and only chance, once every year, to beg for enough funding to run a project of my own... or even just a chance to tell people about my books. Maybe get a few more citations than last year."

Dash watched her slump further against the cot.

"Who cares anyway... it's just a stupid dinner. Just a bunch of big suits and fake smiles."

Dash stood up and approached the bars, but hesitated as she heard steel-shod hooves approaching. She waited patiently for the officers to finish their rounds and go out of earshot.

"Hey."

If Derring heard her, she gave no indication of it.

Dash licked her lips and straightened her posture. "Listen... that medicine? It came from the Crystal Empire."

Derring looked up at her, wearily.

"You know... the place where all the crystal ponies live. I actually met with their prince and helped clear up a big misunderstanding with his true love. She was going all crazy-wacko, blowing up all kinds of things and stealing magical artifacts."

"She did?"

"Nevermind that... the prince is the one who gave me that Miracle Medicine, and he said he knew how to make more of it. We should totally visit him! You and me! We could ask him about it, and maybe he can tell us why it didn't work!"

"You and me."

"Yeah!"

"Should visit the Prince of the crystal ponies. Whom you know personally."

"Like I said, he owes me a solid. So whaddya say?"

Derring gave her a bland look, her eyes half-lidded. "You, miss, are a functioning lunatic."

Dash stamped her hoof. "Oh, come on!"

"No, I really mean it. You're clinically insane, with just barely enough cognitive ability to lead a superficially ordinary life. You live in a delusional fantasy world and suffer from a truly frightening degree of megalomaniacal overconfidence."

"But it's true," said Dash. "I swear! Ask anyone who I am!"

"This comes as no surprise to me at all," Derring said as she stood up from her cot. "This is what happens to ponies who obsess over fictional stories as much as you do. You start to think the fantasy world is real, and it corrupts your perception of reality. I'm entirely serious... those ridiculous storybooks have warped your impressionable young mind beyond all hope of repair."
"Oh for pete's sake! Look, the next time the guard walks past just ask him who I am."

Derring scoffed and turned away.

"What have you got to lose?"

"My dignity," Derring said. "It's all I have left... and I refuse to throw it away to win a pointless argument with a psychotic, self-absorbed, irresponsible stranger that's already ruined my life and my career with her childish antics."

Dash watched her for a while, slumped on the cot. Eventually, a royal guard approached her cell with a ring of keys.

"Bail's been posted, miss. You're free to go."

Dash stepped out, but paused before leaving.

"Derring? You don't fool me. You're the functioning lunatic."

"Leave me alone."

"You're the angriest pony in the world. You cannot move. You cannot sleep. You can just barely talk... bound so tightly with tension and anger, you approach the state of rigor mortis. You ball the anger up inside you, and you think it's the only thing keeping you alive. But it's killing you."

"...I said leave me alone."

"It's not your wing that's kept you back all these years," Dash said, "you just gave up on your own. You need to blame yourself instead of your wing, and get on with your life."

Derring spun around and glared at her. "You shut your mouth!"

The royal guard kicked at the bars of her cell. "Don't you dare speak to her that way! Do you have any idea who this is, or what she's done?"

Derring flinched back in alarm. "W-what?"

Dash set a hoof on the guard's shoulder before he could continue. "Nevermind, Blazer... it's not important."

"Not important!?" he sputtered.

Derring glanced between them. "What are you talking about? What's going on?"

The guard straightened up. "This is Rainbow Dash, champion of the princess and wielder of the legendary Element of Loyalty. She's the close, personal friend of Princess Celestia's own protege, and they've saved Equestria from catastrophe more times than most people can keep count."

Derring's eyes widened. "She... what!? But that was all made up! She's just some deluded bully! Nothing more!"

The guard glared at her. "She's a hero, and you will speak of her with respect!"

Dash shoved the guard's shoulder. "Blazer, enough! It's cool!"

The guard calmed down, grudgingly, and led Rainbow Dash away.

Derring ran to the bars and waved after her. "Wait! Dash!"

She paused to look back at her.

"Why didn't you tell me who you were from the beginning? I had no idea, honest!"

"I wanted you to get to know the real me... to judge me for who I really am, instead of what everyone thinks I am." She lowered her head and turned away. "But I guess that's never going to happen."

Derring watched as she walked down the corridor and out of view, leaving her alone in the cell block.

The next day, Dash took her one and only luggage bag to Canterlot's magnificent Grand Central Station. After an hour or so of waiting in line, she went to the terminal deck and waited patiently for her ride to arrive. A constant stream of whistles pierced the air, each followed by a pony shouting the name of a city or country. She watched the trains go by, ever watchful for a glimpse of Ponyville's humble heraldry waving in the wind.

After a few minutes, a mare stepped up and waited patiently beside her. Dash continued to watch the trains, wordlessly. The mare checked her watch briefly.

Twenty minutes later, an old-fashioned steam train pulled up to the loading dock, pulling a long row of ornate, wood-fashioned passenger cabs. Rainbow Dash checked her ticket and used her wing to carry her luggage bag.

"You live in Ponyville?" the mare said.

Dash turned to her and flinched slightly. Sure enough, it was Derring-Do, but the depressingly modest dress was gone: She was wearing an olive drab vest, a set of hiking boots, and a pair of small but extremely rugged saddlebags. She was wearing a plain news-colt's cap instead of a solid pith helmet, but this was the only notable difference between her and the book illustrations Dash had become so familiar with.

Dash eyed her. "You talkin' to me?"

Derring gave her a casual shrug. "You see anypony else around?"

Dash glanced at the thronging crowd all around them.

"Something I can do for you?"

Derring arched an eyebrow. "...So I 'approach the state of rigor mortis,' do I?"

Dash bit her bottom lip. "Yeah... I kinda got all that stuff out of a book. I'm not exactly sure what it means, but it sounded appropriate."

"I guess."

Dash looked her up and down. "Going somewhere?"

"Somewhere," she said. "Anywhere. I don't care. Just not here."

"You didn't quit your job, did you?"

"No... but they'll probably figure it out when I don't show up tomorrow."

Dash frowned at her. "You're just gonna leave. With no luggage or money or anything."

Derring glanced at her own watch. "I still have some rent money saved up. It wasn't enough for next month anyways, so."

Dash looked ahead, frowning in concentration. Eventually, he eyes shot open. "Oh, no... I really did ruin your career, didn't I? You got arrested for brawling in the streets, and you missed a big fancy university thing!"

"They didn't fire me or anything," Derring said. "I'm just sick and tired of bowing and scraping, apologizing for every little thing, all so I can cling to my little desk job."

"Whoa, whoa... no-no-no!" Dash stepped in front of her. "But that was... that was my fault! I threw a freakin' water balloon at you! I ripped your dress! I twisted your wing all around!"

Derring rolled her eyes. "Does that sound like something a national hero would do? Clearly, it's all my fault."

"They stuck you with the blame for something that was completely my fault?"

"Sucks doesn't it?"

"Look, is this a trick? Are you just trying to make me feel like this is all my fault, and now I have to help you?" Rainbow Dash walked in place, nervously. "Because if it is a trick, it's working!"

"I don't want your help. I never did, and I never will." Derring glanced at a nearby train. "Look, I just wanted a chance to apologize to you. You were right. I am a pretty angry pony, and I think I've got some pretty darn good reasons to be angry. But you're not one of them. So I'm sorry for losing my temper."

"Oh, no you don't!" Dash grabbed her shoulder and locked eyes with her. "I'm not going to let this stand! I swear you won't get in trouble for this, even if I have to go to the princess herself."

Derring-Do scoffed. "For what? So I can go back to a job I hate?"

"Don't say that! You love your job!"

"I've hated it all along. You just pointed it out to me. Thanks, by the way... I mean it."

Derring moved to walk around her, but Dash stepped in her way.

"You hate your job, Derring. But this isn't the answer!"

"Oh it's not, is it? Than what is? This ought to be hilarious."

Dash held her shoulder and locked eyes with her. "You love archaeology... but you hate your job. They're not the same thing."

"My job isn't my job? I dare you to explain that."

Dash pointed a hoof at herself. "You know what I do or a living? I'm a weather pony."

Derring stared back at her, blandly. "...Bullspit."

"It's true. It's absolutely true."

"But that's... that's one of the worst jobs in the world."

"It is, yes. Completely. The pay is terrible, the hours are long, the working conditions are dangerous... most of the other weatherponies are volunteers, so they never show up on time and they never give you a hundred and ten percent... and does anypony ever thank me for a job well done? No! They throw potted plants at me because their precious tomato garden got too much water! The only time anypony ever notices the weather is when it goes wrong. And then I get buried under mountains of complaint letters!"

Derring stared at her. "Then why do you do it? Why don't you quit?"

"Because that's the thing! I love being a weather pony. I love flying, and I love sculpting the weather just right. And darn it, I'm good at it!" Dash stepped back and set a hoof over her heart. "Don't you see? It's the job part I hate: the part of my job that has nothing to do with the weather. But I never let that get in the way of what really matters."

Derring stared at her."You're serious... the Element of Loyalty is a lowly weather pony?"

"I tell ya, Derring: if they didn't pay me, I'd still do it for free."

Derring quirked an eyebrow.

"Come with me," Dash said, "and I'll take the blame for what happened. Promise."

"You'd do that for me?"

Dash shrugged. "I wouldn't be much of an Element of Loyalty if I let somepony else take the blame for something I did."

Derring's eyes flicked side to side. "What's the catch? What do you want in return?"

"Come with me and visit the Crystal Empire. Let's ask the prince about the medicine."

"That's all?"

"That's all."

"Well... okay. I guess." Derring shuffled her feet. "Should I go change into someth—"

"No, that's perfect!" Rainbow Dash grabbed her and pulled her along the platform towards a sleek, silver bullet-train made entirely of bright yellow topaz. She waved at the young colt working as ticketmaster. "Pardon me, boy! Is that the Crystal Empire choo-choo?"

"Track twenty nine?" The cold nodded. "You bet your boots it is! Do you have your fare?"

Dash stepped up. "No sir, but this is totally royal business."

He lifted his cap up. "Royal business?"

"Totally. I'm Rainbow Dash, and I need to—"

"Rainbow Dash? The Element of Loyalty!?" He opened the door wide and waved her in. "Say no more, miss! It'd be an honor to have you onboard!"

"Thanks!" Dash nodded backwards, over her shoulder. "Oh, and I need to bring her along. Because."

"Yes yes, of course. Not a problem. Go to cab three, row eleven to fourteen, and sit anywhere you like. I'll clear it with the terminal staff right away."

"Cool."

Dash stepped into the train, pausing for a moment to let Derring to gape in awe. She climbed in after her, and followed her in a daze.

"You... you just..."

"Yeah? What?"

"It's almost impossible to get an exception here. This train station is legendary for upholding the rules in the most literal and inconvenient ways imaginable. Ponies have had to wait weeks just to get their own luggage back, just because it was tagged incorrectly."

"Yeah, well, this is royal business. They don't make you wait in line for anything when there's an emergency going on."

"Unbelievable," Derring whispered. "I bet you don't have to pay for anything: restaurants, bus fare, postage stamps..."

"Trust me. I always end up paying for it someh—"

Just as they reached passenger cab eleven, a voice crackled over the intercom. "Good afternoon, fillies and gentlecolts, and thank you for traveling Crystal Express Lines. We'll be leaving for the center of the Empire itself in about fifteen minutes... and may I say what an honor it is to have the legendary Rainbow Dash, wielder of the Element of Loyalty and champion of Princess Celestia herself, accompanying us as a passenger."

The seated passengers all looked up at once, instantly fixating on Dash's colorful mane.

"Oh-mi-gosh, look at that!"

"Is it her? It is! It's Rainbow Dash!"

"This is so amazing! Dash, you're my hero!"

A stampede of excited ponies leapt up from their seats and rushed all around them, smiling and shouting, desperate for attention and autographs. Rainbow Dash smiled back at them charmingly, but sidled up against Derring-Do to keep from being completely overwhelmed. It was like being crushed in the center of a hurricane of bubbly excitement.

Dash leaned closer to Derring-Do and whispered out of the side of her mouth. "Like I said... I always pay for it somehow."

Part 3: "This isn't exactly my area of expertise."

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A sleek and slender bullet-train, carved entirely out of glittering golden topaz, hushed to a halt as it entered the Crystal Empire's only railway station. There was a hiss of compressed gas, and the doors slid open by themselves: a crowd of distinctly non-crystalline ponies poured out and talked excitedly amongst themselves. They paid no attention to the interior of the station itself, which had somehow been constructed out of a magnificent spectrum of polished gemstones.

A low, raspy voice called out over the roar of the crowd. "Hey look, everypony! It's Rainbow Dash, over by the gift shop!"

The crowd squealed with delight and stampeded off the landing deck, mobbing the poor vendor on the far side of the station. Only two ponies lingered behind: a khaki-mustard pegasus with her cap pulled down over her eyes and a pony wearing a huge, crumply poncho that obscured her almost completely: the hood was tied tight around her muzzle leaving only her mouth and nose exposed, and the tips of her hooves were briefly visible as she stepped along. The two ponies walked calmly out of the station and into the nearest side alley.

Rainbow Dash tossed the poncho off and gasped for breath. "Finally! I thought that train ride would never end!"

Derring-Do wrapped the poncho into a tiny packet and tucked it away in her saddlebag. "I thought you liked being the center of attention."

"Ugh, no. Just... no." Dash shook her head. "It's fine when it's just a couple ponies, like seven or eight. I love to get to know my fans and talk about stuff we actually care about, but a giant mob is no fun at all. It's like being the rope in a game of tug-o-war." She shook herself out and slicked her mane back. "Me? I like my adoring audience to stay in the bleachers."

"Yes, well." Derring-Do glanced down each end of the narrow alley. "Shall we get this over with?"

"Right, right. The palace is right in the center of town: you can't miss it!" Rainbow Dash hopped up, pumped her wings once, and glided down the alley and into the main street. The gleaming city stretched out before her, like a vast circular amulet encrusted with buildings instead of jewels.

"You've never been here before, have you? Isn't it crazy? They build everything out of gemstones! We still have no idea how they do it, or where they find such huge gems!" Rainbow Dash glanced back over her shoulder and slowed to a halt. "Derring? Hey, Derring!"

She flew in a little circle and scanned the road below. She traced her path back the way she'd came, and finally found Derring-Do in the narrow alley. She hadn't moved a step.

"What's wrong with you? I thought you were in a hurry."

Derring glared at her.

Dash clapped a hoof over her mouth. "Ooh... yeah. The, uh... that whole... thing."

Derring walked past her without a word.

Rainbow followed after her. "Look, I'm real sorry, okay? I just had a brain-burp, that's all. It was real dumb of me, I know."

Derring sniffed. "...And you ended up with loyalty?"

Rainbow Dash caught up and walked beside her for awhile. She said nothing, but her eyes kept flicking over her right side.

Derring scowled at her. "What?"

"You really can't fly," Dash said softly. "I'm sorry, it's just... I can't get used to the idea."

"Just forget it."

"But that's the problem," she said. "I keep forgetting it's there. I tell myself it's not a big deal... but the more I think about it, the bigger a deal it seems like."

Derring rolled her eyes.

"So what is it like?"

Derring shot Dash a glance, but hesitated when she saw the look in her eyes. There was absolutely no pity, nor any shame or embarrassment.

Derring came to a halt. "You really want to know?"

She nodded. "Absolutely. I feel like I'm taking it for granted."

Derring sighed and looked away. "To be perfectly honest... it's not that big a deal. I haven't flown for so long that I've sort of forgotten what it's like. And I never knew anything about weather control to begin with, so that's no loss."

"You have a loft apartment, right? How do you get around?"

"They're called stairs," Derring said with a cheeky smirk. "You should try them some time. Honestly, I don't think of myself as a pegasus that can't fly... I feel like an earth pony with one good wing. And no talent at all for farming or skilled labor."

Rainbow Dash arched an eyebrow. "One good wing?"

Derring lifted her unbound wing and spread it wide. "Lefty still works just fine. It's no good for flying, of course, but I can still carry things and operate simple devices."

Dash watched her plumage. "I guess that's pretty useful after all. But if it's not so bad, then... why are you so angry about it?"

She frowned, but not at her. "I hate how ponies act around me. Canterlot is full of incredibly rich, arrogant snobs and they're all obsessed about being politically correct... despite the fact that most of them don't have a genuinely sympathetic bone in their bodies. I'm sick of it... sick to death of it all."

"You oughta visit Ponyville," said Dash. "It's not nearly as stuffy, and the ponies actually care about each other. Well... most of them do."

"I bet they do, but I'm also betting they don't have a university." Derring sighed. "There's only two universities in the world that have a full-time archeology division. It's a very young field of study."

"Wow... talk about an exclusive club."

They continued walking for a while, idly watching the local ponies and their magnificent, gleaming buildings.

"I think that's the first time in years anypony's asked me about myself," said Derring-Do. "I mean, who I really am... they usually ask about my job or my disability."

"I still feel bad about that," said Dash. "The first time we met, I made a lot of assumptions... I've read those books a million times, and I thought you were—"

Derring let out a sigh of frustration. "I don't want to talk about those silly books. At all."

"I won't. Promise. But I still think you've done a lot of cool stuff... and I bet your real life would make a pretty good story."

"You can't be serious."

"Maybe it won't be an action packed story, but it'd still be really interesting. You're really smart, and you've been to a lot of exciting, far-away places, haven't you? I read that you went on a dozen expeditions!"

"Sixteen," Derring said, "but I was only an assistant excavator."

"Still, you were doing real life archeology! It must have been so exciting!"

Derring-do tossed her head back and laughed.

"What? What'd I say?"

She smiled at her. "I want you to imagine you have a giant garbage dump that's been buried under five meters of dirt, clay, and rock. You have no idea how big it is, or what it contains... and you have to dig up the entire thing using nothing but a grapefruit spoon and a toothbrush."

Rainbow Dash crinkled her nose. "Eeugh. I once had to clean the floor of a whole school cafeteria with a toothbrush... it was brutal."

"Yeah, except this is outdoors, so it's freezing cold or blazing hot."

Dash pursed her lips. "So... if they didn't pay you, would you do it for free?"

"Not an option," Derring said. "Dig sites cost a fortune to set up and the further away you go the higher the price tag. If there's no money, there's no digging."

"What about just going out on your own? There's no law against grabbing a box of tools, and just flying out over the horizon, and—"

Derring-Do squinted at her.

"I, uh... I mean... running off into the horizon, and finding a bunch of ruins to explore all by yourself?"

Derring-Do shoved her shoulder and fixed her with an intense look. "Now you listen here, Rainbow Dash. I can overlook your obsession with sensational pulp-action stories, but there is one particular notion that I need to disabuse you of immediately."

Dash took a step back. "Right, right! Sorry! I didn't mean to—"

"Never, ever, ever work alone," she said. "If you ever go hiking or spelunking or mountain climbing, you always use the buddy system. You bring somepony with you, and you stick together. I went into a cavern all by myself and it cost me my wing. Don't you ever forget that."

Rainbow Dash nodded, quickly.

"Good." Derring nudged her cap up and continued down the road.

After a few minutes of uneventful walking, Rainbow Dash and Derring-Do arrived at the massive, faceted spire at the center of the city. Half its towers were suspended in the air by sheer force of magic, and all the lanterns and candelabras burned with languid, blue flames.

Derring-Do peered up at the ceiling of the main hall. "So, we're in the palace. Uninvited. I notice we haven't been arrested yet."

Rainbow Dash sighed. "You really don't have much faith in me, do you?"

"Not a speck," she said, "but I'm willing to be proven wrong."

"That's all I could ask for." Dash squinted and scanned the crystal ponies gathered about. Most of them were dressed more finely than those outside, and were speaking quietly to each other. "Okay... there's the prince."

"Where?"

"See the geeky little guy, with the glasses? Over by the fountain? That's Prince Gallium. He just woke up from a hundred-year sleeping curse, and he's the only prince they have right now. He's all they got."

"He's got quite a crowd around him... are you sure this is a good time?"

"It's cool. I got this."

Rainbow Dash softly cleared her throat and flexed her shoulders. She then took a deep breath and cupped her hoof beside her mouth. "Hey, four-eyes!"

The prince immediately perked up and looked around the room.

"Are you crazy!?" hissed Derring.

"Would you calm down? I said it's cool."

The prince finally caught sight of them and broke into a wide smile. "Rainbow Dash! You decided to visit us after all!" He walked towards them, leaving the crowd of nobles behind.

Rainbow Dash smiled back at him just as broadly. "Glad to see you too! How's the duchess been? No hard feelings, I hope?"

"Oh, you know, keeping busy," he said. "Most of our outlying estates and villas have been taken over by hordes of giant monsters, and she's sallying forth to single-hoofedly fight them all off... she's never been happier!"

"Sounds like fun," Dash said, "but I'll have to hear about it later. I'm here on royal business."

"Of course, of course." He nudged his glasses up. "What do you require?"

"We just want to know more about that Miracle Medicine you gave us. Is there anything it can't cure?"

"It's completely universal," he said. "Our empire has used it for over a century, and we've never encountered any kind of illness or injury that couldn't be cured by it. Why do you ask?"

Dash turned to Derring, and there was a moment of awkward silence. Dash nudged her, and she looked away slightly.

"Oh, come on," Dash said, "he's not going to bite."

Derring-Do cleared her throat. "Well... your Highness... I have a disability. And the medicine didn't do anything for it."

"Oh dear. That is rather puzzling. Did you apply it properly?"

Derring-Do pointed at Rainbow Dash. "She threw it in my face, if that's what you mean."

"Yes, yes. The elixir is designed to absorb into the epidermal layer and suffuse the entire body. Can you tell me the nature of your injury?"

"My wing is bad."

"Bad?" Gallium nudged his glasses again. "Can you elaborate?"

"It's crippled. I was trapped under a rock and feverish for two days, and they had to... cut it off." The crystal ponies around them all winced with revulsion. Derring-Do blushed slightly. "They took me back to a hospital and used magic to regenerate it, but they couldn't regrow the nerves properly. It still has sensation, but I can't move it at all."

One of the other nobles nodded to her. "Perhaps you should try a dose of our Miracle Medicine, young lady: It can cure any sickness at all!"

"That's why we're here," she said through clenched teeth. "I tried it. It didn't work."

There was a round of gasps.

"The Miracle Medicine failed you? Impossible!"

"How can this be? Has something gone wrong with the machine?"

"...But my father was going to get a dose next week! Whatever will we do if it doesn't work?"

Prince Gallium raised his voice and addressed the crowd calmly. "Patience, my subjects. Patience. This is an urgent issue, and I promise it will be investigated properly. This is hardly the time for panic and paranoia."

The crowd immediately settled down. The Prince turned to Derring-Do.

"I'm very sorry, miss. Our medicine has never failed us before, but this is also the first time it's ever been used on somepony who wasn't a crystal pony. I'll look into this myself as soon as I am able."

"Yeah. Great." Derring glanced at the exit. "So... are we done here?"

Dash turned to the Prince. "Can you tell us anything about how the medicine works? Anything at all, to give us a clue to go on?"

Derring cleared her throat. "That's not really necessary."

"I'll tell you everything I can," said the prince. "I am a master alchemist, after all... but you must know that I didn't invent it myself. I only discovered it."

"Discovered it? How?"

"It's created by an alchemical apparatus that's been in the royal family for generations... it's not fully understood. The apparatus was constructed out of some very unusual components, some of them quite old."

"Old?" Dering-Do frowned. "How old, precisely?"

"Older than the Crystal Empire, to be sure. Other than that, it's a complete mystery... we don't have any experts on old things."

Derring-Do rolled up the sleeves of her jacket. "Show me."

Prince Gallium led them up an elevator and into a large, circular hall. The walls were lined with shelves full of books and laboratory equipment and there were tables arranged in a loose circle... but the centerpiece of the room immediately drew their attention. There was a pair of large crystal tanks, filled with red and blue liquid, respectively. The top of one tank tapered to a narrow point and fed down into the top of other, then formed a long spiral spring within it.

"The Alchemical Alembic Apparatus," Gallium said as he slowly led them around it. "It's similar to a distillery... the liquid in the first tank is heated to a boil, and the vapor moves up through the tube. The second tank is filled with cool water, which causes the vapor to condenses as it passes down through the spiral. It then drips out of the spigot at the bottom as a liquid, purified by several factors. But unlike a normal still, the Alchemical Alembic Apparatius amplifies and refines the magical properties of mystical substances."

Dash stared at the enormous construct. "Wow... do you have any clue how was it made?"

"Most of it is simple alchemy, except for this part here..." He pointed at the top of the machine where a complex clockwork device had been fused along the thin crystal tube. "This is what makes the Alembic possible. It generates a concentrated beam of magical light that shines through the tube and affects the vapor. The light has to be calibrated just so, using just the right color."

Derring-Do peered up at the attachment. "Is there any chance I could take a closer look?"

Prince Gallium pushed a lever in the floor, and a ring-shaped section of the floor lifted up into the air: it snapped apart neatly into individual steps that formed a spiral staircase around the Alembic. The Prince walked up the stairs while they were still clicking into position, and Derring and Dash followed after him.

"Interesting," Derring said as she examined the machinery. "The clockwork technology is certainly impressive, but it can't possibly be more than a thousand years old."

"I built it myself," said the Prince. "All it does is manipulate the light field... I was getting pretty tired of having to do all the math by hoof."

"Why is this part made out of metal?" asked Rainbow Dash. "Why not use gems or jewels or something, like you did with the tanks and the tubes?"

"Opacity," Derring-Do said before the prince could respond. "This is a device for filtering and positioning light... if you built it out of translucent materials, light would come in from the outside and spoil everything."

"Quite correct," he said. "The most important component, however, is that crystal right there." He pointed out a tiny, translucent stone in the heart of the device.

"...It's a prism," Derring whispered. "That's what you use to split the light into separate colors."

Dash grinned and gave her colorful mane a shake. "Hey, you mean like a rainbow?"

"Except this one doesn't split light," the Prince said. "It splits magic."

Dash frowned at the stone. "What kind of gem is it made of? Quartz? Diamond?"

Gallium gave them both a serious look. "We have... absolutely... no idea."

Dash and Derring both looked up at him, surprised.

"But gems are your thing!" Rainbow Dash said, "it's what you do!"

"It's a complete mystery," said the prince. "My grandmother found it when she was a young mare: she was always obsessed with adventure and excitement, and she wasn't a very good empress... but she did find a lot of interesting treasures and artifacts, and that prism was one of them. She brought it back to the empire, and her science-wizards used it to construct the apparatus you see before you. For the longest time, it was only useful for scientific research—really boring stuff—but eventually, somepony figured out a way to use it for medicine. It revolutionized the Empire's medical science by leaps and bounds, almost overnight."

Derring-Do turned back to examine the device. "So was there a violent civil war or something?" she said blandly.

Rainbow Dash nudged her. "That's a terrible thing to say!"

Derring-Do shrugged. "What? That's what always happens."

"You're entirely correct," said Gallium. "There almost was a war: the machine could only make a single dose every month, and everypony wanted it. My grandmother managed to negotiate a settlement that was fair for all, and over time we developed conventional medicines and treatments that alleviated demand."

"Then you dodged an arrow," said Derring. "I've studied a lot of ancient civilizations, and this sort of discovery almost always turns into a disaster."

"It was a close thing," he said. "If it had been any closer, you might be studying our own city right now... but with nopony left to talk to."

Dash stared at the prince. "Dude."

Derring-Do straightened up and turned to the prince. "I assume you've already studied the prism's physical properties to the best of your abilities. Do you have any records I could look at?"

"Right this way, miss." He walked down the spiral staircase and led them to a bookshelf packed with old tomes. "These three shelves contain everything we know about the prism itself, and it's the only part of the Alembic that wasn't constructed by crystal ponies. You may peruse them at your leisure."

Derring lifted her good wing, pulled down a stack of three faded, dog-eared tomes, and carried them to a nearby table. "I'll do what I can, but I can't make any promises. This isn't exactly my area of expertise."

"Anything at all would be appreciated," the Prince said. He nodded to Rainbow Dash. "Come! Let us indulge in some long-overdue hang-time whilst the professor is immersed in her study."

"Well, ah, that'd be really cool and all, but..." Rainbow Dash hopped in place, glancing between the prince and the professor.

"Oh, what am I thinking?" the prince said. "Of course the professor will need an assistant!"

"Right!" she said. "An extra set of hooves is always useful!"

"I understand completely." He turned and walked towards the exit. "Do speak with me if you need anything."

Derring-Do opened the first tome and scrutinized the writing. Dash rushed to her side and began hovering over her shoulder.

Derring peered up at her. "What?"

"So," said Dash, "is there anything you need help with?"

Derring shook her head and turned the next page.

Dash moved sideways and hovered over her other shoulder. "Anything at all?"

"Some quiet would be nice," she said. "I really don't need an assistant for this... it's just reading. You can go 'hang out' with the prince if you wish."

"Are you kidding?" Dash did a midair tumble and landed on the floor beside her. "This is the first time I've ever seen real-life archeology! I wouldn't miss this for the world!"

"Well... I suppose you can help me get the books off the top shelves."

"You got it!" She flew up and began scooping up double-loads of heavy books, dropping them on the table in a heap. "This is gonna be so awesome!"

Part 4: "I am forced to admit... this is somewhat exciting."

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Six hours later, Derring-Do closed a thick book and set it on a stack with all the others. She scribbled a few notes onto a scroll that was already covered with script: mostly page-references and one-sentence reminders that were connected by a complex network of winding arrows. She frowned, and traced one of the arrows down through a hierarchy of mental notes... all of them leading to the crude drawing in the center of the page: a small, simple sketch of a triangular prism.

"Aduu..." she took a book from a nearby stack and flipped to one of several dozen bookmarks: she stared at the full-page illustration for several seconds, and scanned the densely-packed notes on the facing page. "It has to be Aduu. I'd bet my life on it. Rainbow Dash? Can you fetch the green and white binder from my saddlebag?"

She stroked the tip of her hoof down along the page.

"Dash? The binder."

She looked up from her book and only then noticed the loud, abrasive snoring that echoed throughout the room. Rainbow Dash was lying on the floor with her head on a stack of books, with a single droplet of drool sliding down her cheek.

Derring-Do stood up and walked quietly to her side. "Dash. I've got a hint as to the prism's most likely point of origin: I found tiny inscriptions along the prism's edges, and I think I recognize the language."

Dash yawned once, then went back to snoring.

"It's a root-dialect of Aduu, the language used by a race known as the Dzunturan."

Dash turned over on her side and pulled her wing over herself like a blanket. "Thazz... jez... great..."

Derring-Do walked to her saddlebags and took out a white binder with two green stripes. She held it open in front of Dash. "The Dzunturan were an ancient race of ponies that lived in a lost temple-city full of wondrous magical artifacts. The whole civilization was wiped off the face of the world by a terrible curse, and nopony knows it's location."

Dash opened one eye and peered at the book Derring-Do's was holding up: there was a full color, double-page illustration of an ancient city nestled in a jungle valley between two mountain ranges. The buildings in the city were all ziggurats and towers, and all were decorated with an elaborate system of fountains, canals and waterways.

"Whaa!" Dash's eyes shot open, and she flailed her legs and wings in a panic. "Temple city! Evil curse! I wasn't sleeping, I swear!"

Derring smirked at her. "Of course you weren't."

Dash grabbed the book and stared at the lush, colorful illustration. "No way... it's like something out of a storybook!"

"That's probably because it is just a story." Derring-Do closed the book and made her way back to the table. "The Dzunturan were discovered back when popular culture was starting to obsess over lost civilizations. We knew almost nothing about them for sure, and ponies started making up all sorts of outrageous legends."

"But some of it has to be real!" Rainbow Dash struggled to climb out of her nest of books and rushed to Derring's side. "I mean, why would they make up all those legends if there wasn't a tiny seed of truth to it?"

Derring shook her head. "It doesn't matter. There's absolutely no evidence to suggest they their island continent really vanished under the ocean, or that they were really visited by extraterrestrials, or that they were really as old as the dinosaurs."

"No evidence? At all? Not even a little?"

"None."

Dash slumped over the table with a sniffle, and her lower lip started quivering.

Derring turned her scroll of personal notes around and tapped the diagram of the prism. "...Until now."

Dash broke out in a grin, her eyes shining.

"The prism has writing along the very edges... it's practically microscopic, and it would have taken very advanced magic to create such an inscription."

"And if the writing is in their language...?"

Design frowned at her. "Then it's possible they created it. But it could also be nothing but a forgery, made long after the Dzunturans vanished."

"But there's still a chance it's real, right? Even just a little one?"

"A pretty good one, actually." Derring nudged her cap up and gave her a knowing smirk. "This could change everything we know about that period of history... and I know exactly how to discover the truth. Are you with me?"

"You better believe it!"

"Then you'd better pack your bags quick, Dash. We're going to the postal office!"

"Woo!!" Rainbow Dash leapt into the air and did a somersault. She suddenly froze in midair and gave her a quizzical look. "Wait... the post office?"

Derring-Do and Rainbow Dash waited in line at the Crystal Empire's postal delivery office. There were only two clerks behind the counter, and a long line of crystal ponies that wound back and forth between the red-felt ribbon dividers.

"The post office?" said Rainbow Dash. "Why are we here?"

"To send a package, of course." Derring-Do took a single step forward as the line slowly advanced. "I happen to know about the world's foremost expert on Dzunturan history... she's actually conducting an expedition right now. All I have to do is send her my notes and findings on the prism."

"You're just going to dump all this on someponyelse, and forget about it!?"

"She's been an expert on the topic for longer than I've worked at the university. And besides, it might be useful to her." Derring smiled back at her. "Don't worry. I'm sure she'll send us a letter in a month or two."

Rainbow Dash clenched her jaw and stared at her. Her left eyelid twitched.

Derring-Do fussed with the straps on her saddlebag for a moment. "Anyways, I want to thank you for everything you've done. It was kind of fun to have one last adventure."

Dash stamped her hoof. "This wasn't an adventure! This was riding on a train and reading books and waiting in line!"

Derring rolled her eyes. "If you don't like any of those things, you probably don't want to be an archeologist at all. I'm sorry it didn't live up to your childishly unreasonable expectations."

Derring looked towards the front of the line, patiently. Dash ground her teeth back and forth, her whole body trembling. She opened her mouth to shout something but managed to forcibly swallow her words at the last moment. She took a long, deep breath, and exhaled calmly.

"Soooo... Derring. Do you really think this expert will know what to do?"

"Yes, of course. Professor Walski has been studying this topic throughout her entire career."

"How much do you know about her?"

"Well, she's been an archeologist all her life... she's led quite a few expeditions, some of them in very hazardous locations. She's made quite a few discoveries for the university, as well. She's quite famous."

"Is she any good? As an archeologist, I mean?"

"I suppose she must be. She's rather famous, after all. And she gets the lion's share of the university's grant money."

Dash stepped up beside her. "But how well do you know her? Like, personally?"

Derring frowned. "I don't, really. She's just a co-worker. But I have read her books, and she is very well qualified."

Dash lifted one wing and gave Derring-Do a chummy hug. "You know, I bet if you—"

Derring pushed her back. "Don't touch me."

"Right. Sorry. You know, this could be a great opportunity to help your own career."

"What do you mean?"

"If you just send it through the mail, she won't care who it came from... but if you visit her in person, face to face, she'll remember you!"

"She's on an expedition in the middle of nowhere. Wherever it is, it's probably dangerous and most certainly far away."

"That'll just make it even more memorable!" Rainbow Dash held a hoof up to her own chest and spoke in a different voice. "Why, Derring-Do! You came all this way just to deliver an important clue that could help my expedition? Why, that's very impressive! I'll have to tell everyone I know about how serious you are about archeology and stuff, and maybe you'll get more grant money, and a bigger office with a soda machine and everything!"

Derring scowled at her. "That's a long way to travel, just to butter somepony up."

"Think of it as getting your money's worth," said Dash. "And besides: you promised I could watch some real archeology, and we still haven't visited a real-life excavation site! You can't just leave me hanging like this!"

Derring's scowl slowly shifted to a suspicious glance. "All right. We can go visit the expedition in person, and you'll get to see a real-life dig site... but on one condition."

"Anything! Just name it!"

"Hire me."

"...Wha?"

Derring-Do turned to give Dash her full and undivided attention. "If you really want this, you can hire me as a private contractor. I'll take care of transportation, provisions, navigation, and join you a professional consultant. But you'll have to pay for all expenses, as well as my wages—including overtime and hazard pay—in advance."

Dash tilted her head stroked her chin. "I do have a couple bits saved up... how much would it cost, do you think? Just a rough ballpark."

"For a short trip? About a hundred and fifty thousand bits."

Rainbow Dash gawked at her, slack-jawed.

"No refunds." Derring-Do turned to wait in line again. "Let me know if you change your mind."

Rainbow Dash streaked out of the postal office and sped over the streets of the city, leaving a colorful contrail in her wake. She tilted up over the rooftops, made a beeline for the massive central palace, and turned herself sideways to slip through one of the narrow, slit-shaped windows to the upper chambers. She came to a halt in the palace's private library and waved at the Prince.

"Hey, Gallium! Wassup?"

The Prince looked up from his writing desk and waved up at her. "Good evening, Dash! Any progress on the prism?"

"Big time! Derring found a wicked-cool clue, but we need to go somewhere far away to learn more." She glanced around the library. "I don't suppose you have a hundred and fifty thousand bits lying around?"

The Prince opened his coat, rummaged in an inside pocket, and held up a pair of bright-white ingots stamped with the seal of the Crystal Empire. "Take two hundred thousand. I like even numbers."

"Thanks!" Dash ducked down and snatched the bars. "When do we gotta pay you back?"

"Just keep it," he said. "Consider it my contribution to the arts and sciences. Just promise to tell me all about it when you get back."

"Thanks! You're a pal!" She spun in mid air and slipped out through the window.

Derring-Do took another small step forward as the line advanced. There were now only a few ponies waiting ahead of her. She opened her saddlebag and took out a manilla envelope, then looked up to check the prices on display for various postage stamps.

A gust of air buffeted her from behind and a set of hooves clicked on the tile floor behind her. She frowned and looked back over her shoulder: Rainbow Dash was standing behind her, grinning like an idiot with a pair of gleaming white bars clamped in her teeth. Her tail wagged back and forth briskly.

Derring-Do turned around and pointed at the bars. "Are those...?"

"Pfhure pfluhthunum!" Dash said, with a faint spray of spittle.

Derring unfurled her good wing and took the bars, gripping them between two of her primary feathers. "Pure platinum... where did you get these?"

"The Prince," said Dash. "He's made of money. And he was the one who asked us to investigate the prism, so it's only fair he should pay for it... right?"

Derring-Do stared at the bars. "I can't believe I didn't think of that," she whispered.

"Miss? Excuse me, miss?" The clerk at the counter waved at them. "Can I help you?"

Derring looked down at the manilla envelope, packed with all her notes and references.

The clerk cleared her throat. "Can I help you, miss?"

Two days later, Derring-Do marched down one of the many sturdy wooden piers that reached into Horseshoe bay: a vast body of water next to the port city of Baltimare. Rainbow Dash walked after her, turning in circles and gawking at the incredible variety of yachts and sailboats currently on display.

"We're taking a sailboat?" Rainbow Dash shouted over the noise of the waves. "How far away are we going, anyways?"

"It's a great deal of distance," Derring-Do said as she scanning the moored vessels, "but not a great deal of time. It'll be a six hour journey, one way. It's only the last half hour that could be hazardous."

"A real sailboat trip, to a real ancient ruin! I can't wait to get started!"

"I want you to keep one thing in mind, Miss Dash... you're here as a tourist and nothing more. I don't want you doing anything to damage the site or inconvenience the team. We're going to visit them, speak with the professor, and take a very brief tour of the grounds. And then we'll be on our way."

"Yeah yeah, sure sure."

Derring turned back and gave her a firm poke. "I'm serious, Dash. You can joke around with me now and then, but Professor Walski is a veteran of thirty years. If you get on her bad side for any reason at all, there's nothing I can do to protect you."

Rainbow Dash took a deep breath, then nodded once. "I promise. I'll do my very best."

"Thank you. I know you're excited, and that's all right. All I ask is that you not let it go to your head."

Derring continued down the pier and Rainbow Dash followed after her.

"So, are you excited about this? How long has it been since you've been on a dig site?"

"A few years," she said. She looked up at a triple masted schooner, and her voice trailed off. "You know, I can't even remember the last time I left Canterlot."

"Do you remember why you left? Was it an expedition, or a fancy dinner or something?"

"An expedition," she said. "I'm pretty sure it was my trip to the Angono Petroglyphs, in the Fillyppine Isles."

Dash tilted her head. "You're pretty sure?"

"I was only nineteen at the time. It would have been... seven years ago, I guess. Seven? Is that right? " She came to a halt and stared across the water, gazing at the distant shores across the bay. "I'm... twenty six?"

"That's not so old," said Dash. "I mean... it's not really old. I guess."

Derring stared down at the wooden pier under her hooves.

Dash coughed, politely, and looked around. "So. Where's our ride?"

"Right here." Derring tromped forward and stopped by a medium-sized tilt-rotor seaplane painted with bold, black and yellow stripes. "The Goldfinch is the best general-purpose two-seater courier on the market. It's got an extraordinarily light frame, but you wouldn't believe how stable it is. Perfect for stormy weather."

"A plane!?"

"Of course," Derring said with a smirk. "Professor Walski's expedition is deep in the Kathiawari mountain range. It's countless rows of very steep peaks, with plunging glacial valleys in between them. You don't expect me to sail up a glacier, do you? We're in a bit of a hurry, after all..."

A scruffy-looking stallion leaned out of the plane's window and waved at them. "Are either of you Daring Do, by any chance?"

"It's Derring-Do," she said, "with a hyphen. But yes. Did you get my requisition list sorted out?"

"Yes ma'am! Everything you asked for is stowed and ready for transport."

Dash looked up at the two giant propellers on each wing. "Does this thing even work?"

Derring nodded to the stallion. "Can you fire it up for just a moment?"

The stallion ducked back inside. The engine roared to life with the strength and volume of a lion, and the massive propellers spun up to a blur within seconds. A massive gust of salt-sprayed wind buffeted against them, and Rainbow Dash tumbled back along the pier with a surprised yelp. Derring merely leaned into the wind with a smile, scrunching her eyes tight. Her cap flew off her head and vanished somewhere behind her.

"Good enough for me."

Derring-Do walked up the gangplank and entered the plane's modest cargo hold, packed near to overflowing with provisions and equipment. She inspected each item carefully and by the time she was done Rainbow Dash had entered behind her. They met the stallion at the cramped living cabin just behind the cockpit. There were a pair of cots and a tiny kitchen table there, both of which folded up against the wall.

"Here's your charter registration," the stallion said as he set a thick envelope on the table, "and here's your insurance papers and passport. I also took the liberty of getting you a copy of the local air-traffic schedule for the next few days."

Derring-Do opened the envelope and took out a paper booklet. "Everything seems in order. Thank you for everything... especially on such short notice."

"Not a problem, ma'am. Just be sure to treat her well, and she'll bring you back in one piece. I guarantee."

Dash walked past them and peered at the cockpit. "Just look at all those buttons... hey, there's a second seat! Do you think the pilot might let me sit up front for awhile?"

"Well that's up to her," the stallion said as he walked towards the exit. "See you in a few weeks, ladies!"

"Hey, wait!" Dash ran after him and waved out the window. "When's the pilot gonna show up?"

The stallion waved at her, and continued on down the pier. Dash yelped as the engine roared and the propellers to her right whirled to life.

"What the heck's going on? Who's running this thing!?" she slammed the window shut and darted back to the cockpit, where Derring-Do was sitting in the pilot's seat and strapping her harness into place. "You're a pilot!?"

"Since I was six!" Derring shouted over the roar of the aircraft. She glanced back at her with a mischevious smirk. "It's been awhile, though... you might want to hang on to something!"

"You can fly!?" Rainbow Dash let out a joyful laugh. "You can fly! That's—whoooaaa!"

Derring pulled the throttle and the plane surged forward with alarming strength and speed. Rainbow Dash scrambled to hang on to the door frame, but ended up tumbling to the back of the vessel.

Derring took hold of the steering wheel and carefully pulled it close. Gravity pressed down against her as the nose tilted up, and her tummy filled up with butterflies... but despite the intense vertigo, she kept her eyes fixed on the horizon. The rolling ocean waves glittered below them, growing more and more distant with every passing second.

After a few minutes the plane's speed and altitude leveled out. Derring clicked the autopilot switch and leaned back in her seat with a sigh. Rainbow Dash finally staggered to the cockpit and leaned against the entryway. All our of her legs wobbled as the floor rocked and shook.

"Glad you could join me," Derring said. "You're not afraid of heights, are you?"

Dash reached under her wing and took out the cap Derring-Do had lost to the initial propeller test.

"Thanks, but this is an aircraft." Derring-Do reached into a nearby bin and took out a pith helmet, setting it on her head and knocking a hoof against it's top. "Better safe than sorry, right?"

Dash looked at the pith helmet for a moment. She then fixed Derring with a determined, scrutinizing look.

Derring-Do rolled her eyes. "I am forced to admit... that this is somewhat exciting."

Rainbow Dash pumped her hoof in the air and silently mouthed the word 'yes'.

Part 5: "You know what? Don't tell anypony I said that."

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"Dah, da-dah daaah! Dah, da-daaah... Da, da-dah daaah, dah da-dah, dah dah!"

Rainbow Dash stood in front of the map built into the wall, sliding a miniature toy plane along its surface. She held a tiny roll of bright red ribbon underneath it, charting a steady course from the city of Baltimare to the unlabeled continent across the eastern sea.

"After weeks... nay, months, of exhausting travel—

"It's been six hours," Derring-Do shouted back over the roar of the wind and engines.

—our heroes have finally crossed the eastern ocean and arrive at the exotic, faraway land of... of..." Rainbow Dash turned to the cockpit. "Hey, where are we going, exactly?"

"East," Derring-Do said.

"I mean where are we going to end up?"

"Destination. Say 'say destination'."

Rainbow Dash arched an eyebrow. "Um... say destination?"

"Current destination is the Kathiawari Mountains, to rendezvous with the HMS Imbrium. No known co-ordinates."

"What's that mean?"

"It mean's we don't have a bloody clue where we're going. We've been wandering around for the past three hours, waiting for somepony to make contact."

Rainbow Dash looked out a nearby window and saw nothing but fog. "Do you even know if we've crossed the ocean yet?"

"We've got a full navigational sensor suite. We've been over uneven terrain for the past half hour. Definitely mountains."

Rainbow Dash walked to the cockpit and stared at the featureless white expanse beyond the window. "...This is no way to fly."

"I'm fully trained to pilot by instruments, and I promise we're well above the ground."

"It's not that I doubt your ability or anything... the idea of flying with your eyes closed just gives me the shivers."

"Mm." Derring-Do tapped a few of the controls. "It takes some getting used to, I'll tell you that much."

Rainbow Dash watched the instruments for a minute or so. Eventually, she settled into the co-pilot's seat and leaned back. "So... is there anything I can do?"

"You could put some coffee on," said Derring-Do . "If we don't hear something soon over the radio, I might need it."

Dash rolled her eyes. "You know what I mean."

"Yes, I do. Right now, all you can do is sit back and—"

There was a loud buzz from the controls and Dash immediately straightened up. "I didn't touch anything! I swear it wasn't me!"

"Hush," Derring said. She pulled a microphone down from the ceiling and held it to her mouth. "This is civilian Goldfinch two-six-four-november-foxtrot, requesting directions. Please respond."

A crackle of static came through the radio. Derring adjusted one of the knobs.

"I say again, this is civilian Goldfinch two-six-four-november-foxtrot, requesting directions. Please respond."

A voice faded in and out of the static. "—hear me, Goldf—"

"Loud and scratchy," Derring-Do said as she adjusted the knobs further. "Please respond."

The voice came through, this time clearly. "How can you hear me, Goldfinch?"

"Loud and clear."

"Goldfinch two-six-four-november-foxtrot, Squawk one-zero-three and ident."

She tapped several of the transponder's buttons in rapid succession, then took the microphone. "Roger ident."

"We see you on radar, Goldfinch. Say destination."

She gave Rainbow Dash a sideways smile as she spoke into the mic. "Current destination is the Kathiawari Mountains, to rendezvous with the HMS Imbrium. No known co-ordinates."

"This is the HMS Imbrium air traffic control tower. Our schedule shows no incoming flights at this time. State the nature of your visit."

"This is assistant professor Derring-Do from the Canterlot University's Department of Ancient History. I wish to pay a professional visit to Professor Walski and pass along research data that may prove relevant to her expedition."

The voice crackled again. "Docking request acknowledged, Goldfinch. Adjust altitude to nine-thousand meters, course to seventy-six degrees, and speed to sixty knots. Prepare for cable hitch at two-hundred meters distance."

"Affirmative, Imbrium. Adjusting altitude, course and speed."

Rainbow Dash stared at the white-out or a few more seconds. "What's all that mean?"

"It means sit down and fasten your harness."

Dash did so, hurriedly. After several minutes the whiteout began to clear up in patches, revealing flashes of sunlight. Eventually, they burst out of the clouds entirely and entered the airspace of a gargantuan, silver zeppelin with four short, stubby wings on the sides. It had a long, two-story deck along it's underbelly, and a veritable forest of metal towers and antennae clustered along it's top. Streams of mist whorled against its surface like fog rolling off a mountainside.

"Cable hitch deployed," the radio said. "Adjust speed to ten knots and approach aft-starboard stabilizer."

"Affirmative, HMS Imbrium."

Derring-Do released the microphone and took hold of the wheel. The nose of the plane tilted down, giving them their first clear view of the terrain far below: a series of three arctic mountain ranges, jagged and steep, with a thick white mist obscuring the valleys sandwiched between them. The plane curved closer and drew up along the side of the airship, giving them a magnificent view of it's true size.

"And now the fun part," muttered Derring-Do. She pulled a lever and the plane lurched violently forward. Rainbow Dash glanced out the side of the window and watched as their wings rotated, pointing the propellers straight up. The plane leveled out and hovered in place directly beneath one of the zeppelin's huge, stubby wings: at this distance it was clearly the size of a building. Derring maneuvered the plane in place for a few seconds until something finally clamped against them and hoisted them up.

She cut the engines entirely and leaned back in her seat with a sigh.

"That was pretty quick," said Rainbow Dash. "How many times have you done this?"

"Only twice, actually. Once was just a simulator." She bit her bottom lip. "You know what? Don't tell anypony I said that."

Dash made a zipping motion across her lips.

The cable hoisted them up and into the stabilizer, which was furnished like a small aircraft hangar. The floor sealed shut below them and a metal gangplank slid out and pressed gently against the side of the plane. Derring-Do climbed out of the pilot's seat and walked back to the door, taking a moment to make sure her helmet was secure. She and Rainbow Dash walked out across the gangplank side by side, and a burly pegasus stallion met them halfway across: He was dressed in a rugged blue uniform that was covered in old grease and dirt stains.

"Welcome aboard, professor Do. My name is Skyworthy." He nodded to Rainbow Dash. "And this must be your pilot! I must say, you've got a lot of guts to come through this kind of weather in a civilian tilt-rotor... and that was the quickest cable hitch I've ever seen! How long have you been flying?"

"All my life, but never in a plane." Rainbow Dash pointed at Derring-Do. "That was all her."

Skyworthy raised both eyebrows. "You're a professor and a pilot?"

Derring-Do looked away. "It's not—"

Rainbow Dash hooked her front leg over Derring's shoulder and hugged her close. "I know! Isn't she just awesome?"

Derring pushed her away and cleared her throat. "Is Professor Walski available?"

"She's on-site at the moment," said Skyworth. "We spoke to her briefly over radio, and she's agreed to spare an hour or so. Right this way." He walked towards the exit and gestured for them to follow.

"Thank you very much," Derring-Do said. "I know it must be very inconvenient for her, especially on such short notice."

"Aw, it's no trouble at all... to be honest I think she's glad to finally have another egghead to talk to. Might cheer her up a bit."

He opened a door and led them to the interior of the zeppelin's balloon: the vast, empty space was supported by numerous grids of slender metal struts, and there were walkways leading all throughout. There were only a few other ponies in sight, almost all of them pegasi.

"The air here is so still," Rainbow Dash whispered. "The inside of the balloon is one giant weather pattern... I've never seen such tight control before!"

"It's how we keep this tub in the air," Skyworthy said. "Our pegasus teams control the air pressure at all times and keep the air as still as possible. If it weren't for them, the weather outside would crumple us like a paper bag."

"Your boys must really know what they're doing. How big is the team?"

"Six pegasi each," Skyworthy said, "and there's two teams. They work in shifts."

Derring-Do looked down each end of the zeppelin. "How many excavators do you have?"

"Thirty, about. That's not really my department."

Derring stared at him. "Thirty? That must cost a fortune!"

"They're just laborers," he said. "In fact, most of them are just regular crewponies. Hauling rocks isn't much different than moving freight."

"No, I mean... how many assistant archeologists do you have? How many of them are certified excavators?"

Skyworthy shrugged. "You'd have to ask the professor."

He led them down a stairwell and into the ship's lower deck, hanging from the underbelly of the balloon. He led them into a large elevator platform with thick glass walls covered by heavy metal fencing.

"You're not easily airsick, are you?"

"Not even close," said Dash. "Why?"

"Sorry. Never hurts to check."

He pulled a lever and the elevator shuddered around them. The entire compartment slid down through the floor, thousands of meters over the ground. It slid down along a heavy metal cable that hung from the bottom of the airship: it held the weight but the terrific wind swung them back and forth like a pendulum. As they descended, blowing snow began to obscure their vision and coat the glass windows with a thick layer of frost.

Rainbow Dash grabbed the support bar by the wall and stared out the window. "This is amazing! Look at how high up we are! It looks like there's nothing holding us up at all!" She began leaning side to side. "Hey, do you think we could get it swinging it even faster? Woo! Woo! Woo!"

Skyworthy passed a bulky winter coat to Derring-Do, whispering as he did so. "So... is your friend incredibly brave, or just incredibly stupid?"

"Not sure," she said. "Possibly both."

After fifteen minutes of swaying back and forth in the howling snow, the cable elevator settled on solid ground. All three of it's occupants were wearing heavy winter coats and full face masks as they stepped out into a torrential snowstorm. They'd landed on a jutting, rocky platform that had been partially cleared of ice and built into a temporary base camp: there were several large grey tents set up in a row, with walkways through the snow outlined by strings of bright blue crystals on stakes.

Dash and Derring followed Skyworthy as close as they could. Except for the lines of glow crystals, they couldn't see more than a few yards away. Other ponies loomed into view without warning, all wearing the same bulky coats and full face masks. Skyworthy looked inside one of the tents for a moment and shouted something, then came back and led them further through the camp.

They came to the mouth of a cave set in the side of the mountain, where a series of heavy sealed tarps had been set up like curtains. Skyworthy led them through a series of heavy curtains and into a cave filled with laborers. Hundreds of glow crystal stakes had been pounded into the floor and walls, and there were scaffoldings everywhere. Some were wooden walkways, and others supported a modest network of minecart rails.

Skyworthy took off his mask and pulled back his hood. "She should be somewhere around her. Stay close, and don't—"

"I know, I know," said Rainbow Dash, "don't touch anything."

"I was going to say no flying," Skyworthy said, "but that too."

"No...? Hey! Why can't I fly?"

"Pegasus flight isn't just physical aerodynamics," interjected Derring-Do. "It's partly magical, and very closely related to weather magic. They need to maintain the temperature perfectly to avoid damaging the site, and even routine flying magic could interfere with that."

"Oooh." Dash nodded to Skyworthy. "Four-on-the-floor, I promise."

Skyworthy shrugged. "Uh... actually, I just don't want you bumping into anyone or knocking anything over. We only worry about contaminating the weather patterns while we're in the zeppelin."

Derring-Do pointed at the main entrance. "But then... why the quarantine door? Why install an environmental seal if you aren't going to preserve the air conditions?"

"Mostly to keep it warm in here. We need to conserve on heating fuel whenever possible."

Derring-Do glanced around the cave. "But what about corrosion? If the air warms up, the ice will start dripping. You'll get water damage all over the place."

He shrugged. "As long as it's not a safety hazard, we're not too worried about it. Right this way, if you please."

They followed him further into the caverns. The next area was full of gruff, burly laborers hauling crates and sacks full of rocks and rubble. They were dressed in winter coats but most of them were unbuttoned in the front: even though they were all equipped with breathing masks and oxygen tanks, they were sweating with effort. Rainbow Dash watched in awe as a pair of stallions pushed a minecart past them, loaded to the brim with fragments of statues and engraved slabs.

Rainbow Dash hopped in place. "Wow... real life ancient ruins! How old are they? Are there more, further in?"

"How did you remove them?" said Derring-Do. "And how are you going to transport them?"

"That's quite enough, young fillies." Skyworthy went into a small side-cave and cleared his throat. "Professor Walski. You have visitors."

A middle-aged mare looked up at them from behind a folding metal table. Her coat was a light bronze color, and her chestnut mane and tail had only the slightest streak of grey. She was wearing an elegant, narrow-waisted overcoat with a long, stiff collar: The densely-woven wool was embroidered with a continuous pattern of curly, flowering ivy, and a pleated skirt emerged from beneath it to brush against the floor of the cave. She was wearing a wide-brimmed hat that was festooned with artificial flowers and ringed with a black-lace veil that hung across her face.

"Derring-Do," she said. "To what do I owe the pleasure?"

"Professor Walski." Derring do took off her helmet and tucked it under her wing. "I've been investigating an unusual artifact recently, and uncovered a few details that could link it to the ancient Dzunturan. I was hoping to make use of your expertise."

"And you came all this way, just to speak with me in person?" The Professor tilted her head. "Is there any reason the postal office wouldn't have sufficed for your needs?"

"Well... the issue is rather time critical, and I was hoping for a bit of back-and-forth on the subject. Given your remote location, I figured a full correspondence would have taken several months."

"Well then," she said, "it's good to know you're so dedicated to your field. Do please, have a seat."

"Thank you, ma'am." Derring-Do walked to the table and sat in a folding chair.

"So," Rainbow Dash said, "do you need me for this? Or do you think I could go get a tour while you hang out?"

Professor Walski eyed her critically. "And you are?"

"I'm just here to hang out. I swear I won't get in your way."

"You're certainly right about that. I'm sure Mister Skyworthy will happily escort you back to the airship before you do any damage."

"Wait, wait wait! Can't I at least get a little tour before we go? Just a teeny-tiny little one? I came all this way!"

She scowled at her. "What does this look like, a children's playground?"

Dash's eyes glimmered with moisture and her lower lip quivered.

Walski scowled at her. "You mustn't pout, young filly, or a chicken will come and sit on your lip. Now be on your way and let the grownups talk amongst themselves in peace."

Derring-Do cleared her throat. "To be fair, I did promise Miss Dash a very brief look-around, as long as she promised to behave herself. I'm willing to vouch for her."

"Then you mustn't make promises you can't be sure of keeping."

Derring-Do stepped closer and lowered her voice. "I should point out that Miss Dash is very interested in archeology... so much so, in fact, that she decided to fund this little visit herself."

The Professor arched an eyebrow. "Are you saying she's...?"

"...A wealthy, eccentric tourist," said Derring-Do, "and it would be a shame to lose her interest before she becomes fixated on something else... renaissance paintings or deep-sea diving, perhaps."

"Wealthy and eccentric? That is the very best kind of tourist, I suppose." The professor walked around her desk and approached Dash. "And what is your name, young filly?"

"Dash," she said, puffing her chest out. "Rainbow Dash!"

"Walski," she said with a slight bow. "Perez Walski. I think a short tour can be arranged, as long as you can keep your hooves and wings to yourself and go exactly where you're told."

Dash sketched a salute. "Yes, ma'am!"

"Mister Skyworthy?"

The stallion's posture straightened. "Yes, Ma'am?"

"See if you can give Miss Dash the two-cent walkabouts. Take her as far as sector eighteen, and give her a chance to peruse the sorting room at her leisure. Bring her back here in an hour or so, and we'll figure out what we're all doing for the rest of the day."

"Yes, Ma'am." Skyworthy nodded to Dash. "Shall we?"

"You bet!" Dash followed him out of the cave and waved back at Derring-Do.

"Now then, Miss Do. Your questions?"

Derring-Do used her good wing to open her saddlebag and set a series of scrolls on the table. She spread them out and Professor Walski immediately picked out one in particular: a diagram of the crystal prism, with several close up details of its microscopic engravings.

"Aduu?" she whispered. "Where did you find this?"

Derring-Do continued to rummage in her saddle bag. "I swear, Perez... you'll never believe me."

"The list of things I refuse to believe in is very small." She sat down and took a pair of bifocals out of her coat pocket. "Tell me everything."

Part 6: "I'm not doing this for archeology. I'm doing this for you."

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An hour later, Rainbow Dash followed Skyworthy out of the deeper caverns, grinning broadly. There was an energetic bounce in every step she took. When they returned to the small cave with the folding metal table, she rushed in and squealed with delight: Derring and Walski looked up from the heaps of scrolls and notebooks.

"I trust your walkabouts was rewarding?" Walski said.

"This is the coolest thing I've ever seen, done, heard, or visited! There's real-life ruins back there! Like, actual corridors with bricks and tiles and statues, and all sorts of crazy runes and symbols! I don't know how this day could get any better!"

"I'm sure I can think of something," said Professor Walski. "How would you like to take home a souvenir?"

Rainbow Dash let out a squeal of pure joy.

Derring shot out of her seat, alarmed. "Perez, no! How could you!?"

"Calm down, Miss Do. I was thinking we could teach her how to take a charcoal rubbing. I'm neither a profiteer nor a smuggler."

"Oh...well, of course." Derring Do sat back down. "Had me worried there."

"What about you two?" Rainbow Dash said, "did you figure out anything cool while I was gone?"

"We learned quite a bit," Derring-Do said, "though I think it will be much more useful to Walski than ourselves."

Rainbow Dash sat at the table next to Derring. "Oh? How do you mean?"

Professor Walski clasped her hooves together. "The Dzunturan were an ancient race of ponies... in fact, they're the oldest equine civilization known to us, and their discovery raised quite a few big questions. You see, some scientists believe that all three of the modern equine races—that is, earth ponies, pegasi and unicorns—are all descended from a single genetic ancestor. Paleontologists have been searching for a missing link for decades: some kind of pony species that we all evolved from."

Derring nodded, eagerly. "So far, nopony's found any clear evidence for or against this theory... but the Dzunturan might be exactly what we're looking for. It would have taken thousands of years for us to evolve this way: the same period of time when their civilization was at its peak."

"No way!"

"Well it's all just speculation," said Professor Walski. "Until we can find an actual city to examine, we'll never be certain."

"That's what Walski is looking for right now," Derring-Do said, "the lost capital of the Dzunturan, and the heart of their once great empire. She's been searching for thirty years!"

"Thirty four," she said, "and I expect to be searching for quite a bit longer still. Patience, as everypony knows, is a virtue."

"Searching for the lost, ancient city of a lost ancient race?" Rainbow Dash leaned her head on the table and let out a longing sigh. "This is so much better than the books!"

Walski smiled. "I should hope so. Reference material can be exceedingly boring to the uninitiated."

Derring shook her head. "She means the, ah... novels."

"The what?"

"There's a series of fictional novels about archeology. Pulp-action archeology."

Rainbow Dash nodded. "I've read the whole series a couple of times!"

"Fiction, eh?" Walski frowned at her. "You really ought to avoid that sort of thing... it's liable to rot your brain before long."

Dash scowled, but Derring cut her off with a wave. "Well, then! Thank you very much for your time, Professor Walski. I do hope you find my notes useful."

"Quite, quite." Walski stood up and led them towards the main entrance. "I'm terribly sorry I couldn't shed much light on your own project. I'd be happy to add your name to my final report to the board of directors, once this expedition is complete."

"You'd do that for me?" Derring-Do took her hoof and shook it vigorously. "Thank you, professor! Thank you very much!"

"Quite all right, considering how helpful your reports were. We may have to plan an expedition to the Crystal Empire, sometime soon: it's quite a bit further west, but about the same latitude. A very curious coincidence indeed."

Dash cleared her throat gently. "Um, excuse me professor Walski?"

"Yes, what is it?"

"Do you think I could still get that souvenir? Maybe?"

"Oh, where is my head? Yes of course. Were there any engravings in particular that caught your attention?"

Dash grinned, broadly. "Yeah! The great big one, in between the two big pillars!"

"Right this way, then. Would you like to come along, Miss Do? Perhaps you have the honor of teaching Miss Dash how to perform a charcoal rubbing properly?"

"I think I can handle that much," Derring said with a smirk.

Professor Walski led them further into the caverns. After several twists and turns, the sound of chipping stone and grinding metal echoed all around them. Derring watched as laborers pushed minecarts down the corridors, carrying loads of rubble and gravel.

"Isn't this amazing?" said Rainbow Dash. "I wonder how long it took to dig all this out?"

"Months, probably," Derring-Do muttered.

"Two weeks, actually," Walski said. "Each expedition teaches us something new, and we've improved our methods enormously over the years."

"How did you instal these railways?" Derring said.

"The usual way, I suppose. I leave such things to the fore-pony's discretion."

Derring looked up at her. "You mean you weren't there to oversee it yourself?"

"We've already laid some three miles of scaffolding, Miss Do. You can't expect me to be everywhere at once."

"I... suppose not." Derring turned to watch the laborers, all carrying heavy pickaxes and sharpened spades. "Mister Skyworthy mentioned you had over thirty laborers. How many excavators do you have?"

"I have a pair of assistants who report to me directly," Walski said. "Other than that, I do all the delicate work myself."

Derring-Do bit her lower lip. Her eyes darted side to side. "Doesn't that seem a little extreme, professor? You can't possible deal with such a massive workload all by yourself. Nopony could."

"I delegate, Miss Do. In these modern times, any major undertaking requires a certain knowledge of administrative techniques... I assure you, I personally look over every artifact the workers uncover, and decide what requires a closer look."

"Shouldn't you be the one uncovering these artifacts in the first place? A common miner knows nothing about excavating delicate evidence!"

Walski frowned at her. "Certified archeological excavators earn a much higher hourly wage, and they take a hundred hours to do the job that a miner can accomplish in one hour."

Derring-Do glared at her. "Is money all you care about? What about proper procedures?"

"Miss Do!" Professor Walski's voice rang out across the cave, loud and stern. The workers all paused in their tasks and turned to watch. "This operation is not performed at the discretion of the university... it is funded by private investors. All together, this expedition costs my investors twenty thousands bits a day to maintain. And in return, those investors ask for only one single thing: results."

"But... but...!"

Walski stepped forward and gently set a hoof on Derring's mouth. "Stop stammering, dear. It's unbecoming. I know it's been a very long time since you've visited a dig site in person, Miss Do. This is the first time you've seen modern methods being employed, and so I will forgive your outburst. But this is how things are done these days. It is better to risk damaging one artifact if it means we successfully uncover nine others. Archeology is a science, not an art... and science is pragmatic."

Derring looked down at her hooves. "Yes, ma'am. Sorry, ma'am."

Rainbow Dash's eyes darted back and forth between the two professors. "You don't really believe all that garbage, do you?"

Walski glowered at her. "Miss Dash. Your wealth and eccentricity will only go so far in endearing you to me."

Dash straightened up and met her gaze. "Well it's pretty clear that Derring-Do is twice the archeologist you are!"

Walski sniffed at her. "Of all the impertinence."

"Dash, no!" Derring-Do put a firm hoof on Rainbow Dash's shoulder. "Don't you dare embarrass me with one of your temper tantrums! Walski is ten times the archeologist I am!"

"What, because she's found more stuff!? That just means she's more famous! Real archeology is about perseverance! It's about digging away at the dirt with nothing but a grapefruit spoon and a toothbrush, sweating under the burning sun for days and days!" Rainbow Dash pointed a hoof at professor Walski. "But you'd use a bulldozer to dig up a teacup!"

Professor Walski rolled her eyes. "And now we see what those pulp-fiction novels have done to your sense of realism. I think you're completely out of your league."

"You do, huh?" Dash flapped her wings and hovered a few feet over the professor, brandishing her front hooves like a boxer. "Well I think you can shove it in your ear!"

"Dash!" Derring-Do shouted, angrily. She grabbed Dash's leg and pulled her down. "Don't you dare speak to her that way! She's a professional, and this excavation is her responsibility! We've got absolutely no right to pass judgment on her methods!"

Rainbow Dash looked at her. "Derring, where'd your spine go!? You know what an arrogant, stuck-up loser she is! You know it better than I do!"

Derring-Do pulled her into a headlock and brought her kneeling to the ground with alarming strength and speed. She brought her face close to hers, and her bright purple eyes smoldered with volcanic rage.

Rainbow Dash swallowed, hard. "Shutting up now," she said.

Derring-Do let go of her and nodded to Walski. "I'm deeply sorry for her behavior, Professor. I'm sure we've overstayed our welcome and I promise we'll be out of your way as promptly as possible."

Walski sighed and shuffled her hooves. "You may as well stay the night, and let your plane recharge its power crystals... to say nothing of giving you a good night's sleep before you have to pilot. A few rude words isn't reason enough to risk a dangerous trip home."

"Thank you, professor."

Derring-Do took Dash by the shoulder and led her towards the exit. She followed beside her until they reached the frigid cave that led outside. Dripping water echoed off the stone walls, and the tarps flapped against the howling wind outside.

"Well?" Derring said. "Do you have anything to say for yourself?"

She flexed her shoulder. "You've got a real mean take-down, you know that?"

Derring punched her shoulder. "I mean about your horrible behavior!"

"Professor Walski is wrecking this place! You know she's wrecking this place! How can you stand by without even saying a word!?"

"It's her dig!" Derring said. "It's her expedition, it's her team, it's her ruins... and it's her reputation on the line!"

"These ruins don't belong to her," Dash said. "They belong in a museum."

"Well they'll never get there at all if she doesn't do her job to the best of her abilities! Neither you nor I are skilled enough, or experienced enough, to question her judgment!"

Dash gave her a bland, emotionless look. "I saw a crate of dynamite lying around."

"I don't care what you saw!" Derring-Do choked briefly. "She's using explosives!?"

"You know she's not a better archeologist than you! She's just more famous, and she has more toys to play with! She doesn't really love it like you do!"

Derring-Do's voice rose to a shout. "Professor Perez Walski is one of the greatest archeologists in the world! She's been doing this for over thirty years, and she's published over a hundred books! Have you read any of them? Have you? Well I have, a hundred times each, and I can guarantee you she's passionate about what she does! I don't care what else you say about her: she loves her work more than anypony else in the world!"

"She's a wrecking ball! She's a bull rampaging through a china shop!"

"Don't you talk about her that way! She's ten times the archeologist that I could ever be!"

Rainbow Dash stared at Derring-Do: her face was twisted in anger and her cheeks were streaked with tears. Her cheeks were flushed and she was gasping for breath.

"I'm sorry," Dash whispered. "I'm sorry your hero wasn't what you expected."

Rainbow Dash turned and took a heavy winter coat from a nearby rack. She put it on and walked out of the cave without looking back. The sound of wet, choking sobs was quickly drowned out by the icy, howling wind outside.

Rainbow Dash lay on her cot in the living quarters they'd been assigned. She stared at the featureless white ceiling and listened to the quiet creak of the airship all around her. She turned onto her side, then the other. She let out a long, quiet sigh and closed her eyes. She began muttering to herself, and finally screamed at the top of her lungs and threw her pillow across the room.

Stupid archeologists... just a bunch of stuck up losers. All of 'em. She laid on her back and stared at the ceiling again. I've got to start reading books about spaceships or something.

There was a knock at the door. "Hello? Anypony home?"

"Yeah... may as well come right on in."

The door opened and Skyworthy stepped in backwards, pulling a tea-cart behind him.

"You again?" said Dash.

"I figured you could use something to soothe your body and spirit... and nothing helps you forget about the cold outside like a cup of steaming-hot cocoa."

"Sorry, but I'm not very thirsty right now."

He took up a kettle and poured it into a thick white mug. "Well, why don't I just leave this on the endtable for you anyways? Your tummy might change it's mind when the smell hits your nose."

Rainbow Dash watched him set a mug on the nearby table, next to the lamp.

"Hey."

"Yes, Miss Dash?"

"Do you know where Derring-Do is?"

"Oh, her. We found her in the entry cave all by herself. We had to carry her back to the elevator on a stretcher."

She sat bolt upright. "A stretcher!?"

"Mm hm. She wouldn't say how she ended up there all by herself, but the poor thing didn't have an oxygen tank with her. The atmosphere up here is too thin for anything more than a casual stroll."

"All by herself," Dash muttered.

"Don't you worry," Skyworthy said, "the ship's doctor says she'll be just fine after a short rest. She's sleeping it off in her room right now."

Rainbow Dash propped herself up with her front knee. "Where's her room?"

"That'd be number five, just down the hall. You can visit her if you like, but it might be best to let her sleep a little longer."

Skyworthy left her room and closed the door behind him. After a few minutes, Dash picked up the mug with her wing and carried it out into the hall with extreme care. After a few steps, she was standing in front of a metal door with the number five printed on it. She set the mug on the floor and quietly knocked.

"Are you awake in there? I brought you some hot cocoa."

She stared at the door for a moment.

"I need to talk to you. Can I please come inside?"

She pressed her ear to the door, but heard nothing.

"Well then... I'll just have to say it through the door. I'm... sorry." She slumped to the floor and let out a sigh. "No, that's not enough: I'm extra-super-duper-double sorry. All I could think about was saying 'I told you so'. I never once thought about how you must have really felt. That was the lowest I've ever seen you, so sad and hurt and angry, and all I did was kick you while you were down."

Rainbow Dash leaned her head against the door with a thump.

"I'm sorry. I've had a ton of fun watching you do real-life archeology stuff. Can we still be friends, please?"

She watched the door for awhile.

"Why aren't you saying anything? Are you quiet because you're angry at me? Or are you quiet because... you're asleep and you haven't heard a single word I've said?"

Rainbow Dash stood up and stared at the number five.

"Okay. If I ask to come in, and you don't want me come in you can just say no. And I'll stay out. And if you're asleep, I'll back out real quick... I'll only watch you sleeping for, like, a second."

She set a hoof on the door lever, but hesitated.

" 'Watch you sleep for a second'? Wow, that's creepy when I say it out loud. Okay, how about this: I'll open the door a crack, without looking, and just listen. If I can hear snoring, I'll close it again. Okay? Okay."

Rainbow Dash pushed the lever and opened the door a crack, listening intently.

"Well I don't hear any snoring, and you haven't told me to stay out. That means you don't mind if I come inside." She opened the door wide and stepped inside, glancing around. "Or... you're not here at all. And I'm just talking to myself like an idiot. Great."

She stroked her hoof against the rumpled bed sheets, and frowned quizzically.

"So where are you?"

Rainbow Dash snuck down the metal stairwell that led to the airship's spacious cargo hold. All the lights were set to low and there was nopony else in sight. The arctic nights were too cold for any sort of work, so the laborers all slept in the airship. As Dash reached the last step, she saw a single pony over by the cable elevator: she was obscured by a heavy winter coat and a full facemask with a breathing apparatus. Dash walked closer, very quietly, and watched as the mare opened the elevator's front door.

"Where're you going?" said Dash.

The pony spun around to look at her. She snatched up a pair of saddlebags and dove into the elevator, pulling the release lever.

Rainbow Dash moved towards the elevator at a leisurely jog and stood in the way as the elevator door slid shut around her. They bumped against her sides, let out a chime, and opened up again. Dash stared at the mare, blandly, as the doors closed and opened repeatedly.

"Where're you going?" said Dash.

Derring-Do pulled her mask down and let it hang around her neck. "I need to take a look at something in the ruins."

"I thought you said they were Professor Walski's ruins. Isn't that stealing?"

"Well that's the great thing about charcoal rubbings. Whenever you take them, you leave the original behind."

Rainbow Dash arched one eyebrow.

"Look, when we were walking through the ruins I saw several carvings that seemed to reference a geometrical shape... and after doing the linguistics, I'm pretty sure that shape matches the same triangular prism we found earlier. I'm absolutely convinced there's a connection, and this could be our one and only chance to learn the truth."

"Why not wait for Walski to figure it out? You gave her all your notes, didn't you?"

"Because she might not be looking for it. Her methods are... well, they're her methods. And they're great for finding what you're looking for."

"...But?"

"But they won't help her find things that she isn't looking for." Derring-Do took off her saddlebag and checked the contents one last time. "Look, this doesn't make me a hypocrite. I just need to go in and take a few notes before the excavation continues tomorrow morning. This is something I need to do myself."

Dash stepped into the elevator. "I'm coming with you."

"Don't even joke about that," Derring said. "This will require me to trespass on university property. If they catch us, we'll almost certainly face exorbitant fines and a lengthy jail term. I can't let you risk that... and more importantly, I can't have a clumsy, ignorant non-archeologist tromping after me."

"Sorry," Dash said, "but you're stuck with me. Get used to it."

Derring-Do stepped close and hissed at her under her breath. "I no longer have the time nor the patience to put up with your ridiculous fascination with archeology! I refuse to indulge you any further!"

"I'm not doing this for archeology. I'm doing this for you."

"Well I don't want your help!"

Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes before meeting her gaze. "If you ever go hiking or spelunking or mountain climbing—

Derring-Do waved at her. "No. Just... don't."

—you always use the buddy system. You bring somepony with you—

"Not one more word, I'm warning you!"

—and you stick together."

Dash and Derring glared at each other for a moment.

"Fine. You can come along. But stay out of my way."

"Be reasonable, Derring-Do... you need all the help you can get. Just think of me as your own personal bodyguard."

"I can take care of myself," Derring said.

"Now who's living in a delusional fantasy? I've personally kicked a dragon in the face and lived to tell about it. You, on the other hoof, have spent the last ten years sitting behind a desk." Dash put on a winter coat of her own and stood beside her. "I'm not saying books aren't cool... they are. But I'm making it my job to keep you alive long enough for you to do your job."

"Now who's the drama queen," Derring-Do muttered as she closed her saddlebags up.

"Here, let me," Dash said and reached for the bags. "Really, it's cool. I work out a lot."

Derring-Do looked her up and down. "Wing-wrestle you for it."

"What?"

"Wing-wrestle you. Winner carries the bags."

"Oh, no. No-no-no." Rainbow Dash pointed to herself. "Trust me, sister, you don't want any of this."

Derring-Do unfurled her left wing and pointed it straight up.

Dash squinted at her. Finally, she extended her own wing and locked the joint against hers. "You asked for this," she said.

Rainbow Dash clenched her teeth and heaved with all her strength, but Derring-Do's wing fell down on her like a sack of bricks and slammed her against the floor. Dash lay on her back and let out a slow, strangled gasp.

Derring ran her nose along her feathers, preening them for a moment. "Like I said... lefty works just fine."

"But... how!?" Dash rolled onto her side. "You've gotta be stronger than most earth ponies I know!"

"I go through physical therapy to keep my right wing from atrophying," she said, "so I decided to exercise both of them together. Plus, I won't ever have to worry about being buoyant or aerodynamic... I can bulk out on heavy muscle as much as I like."

Derring-Do held out her hoof. She was actually smiling.

Rainbow Dash smiled back at her as she took her hoof. "Now that's more like it!"

Derring hoisted her saddlebag up and onto her back with one powerful heave. "More like what?"

"Never mind."

Part 7: "It's harder to find what you're not looking for."

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Derring-Do and Rainbow Dash held on tight as the cable elevator descended from the zeppelin. The wind and snow were just as strong as ever, but this time there was no sun to light the way: the temperature had plunged even further below freezing, and everything was pitch black... even the inside of the elevator was barely visible.

The swaying sensation lessened over time, and the elevator finally settled on the freshly fallen snow with a deep crunch. The glass-and-fence doorway opened wide, blasting them both with a gust of wind. The glow-crystals that outlined the walkways were a dark, indigo blue. There was nothing else to see: the camp itself may as well have been gone.

"Stay close," Derring-Do said. "If either of us gets separated, we both go back to the elevator and wait."

Rainbow Dash shook her head. "Impossible... it's too cold to survive out here. We gotta meet up at the cave entrance, past all those heavy curtains."

Derring-Do glanced out at the camp. "All right."

"That's it?" Dash said. "No arguments?"

"You're the weather pony," said Derring. "Just promise not to argue with me once we reach those ruins."

They stepped out of the elevator together and landed knee-deep in freshly fallen snow. They walked along the pathways, using the dim indigo light to navigate the tents. Suddenly, Rainbow Dash grabbed Derring-Do and pulled her off the path.

"What's the big—"

"Shush!"

Dash led her between two of the tents and hunkered down against the snow. A moment later a pair of burly stallions walked right past them, looming out of the snow without the slightest warning. They were dressed in the same heavy winter gear as before, and had pieces of heavy equipment hitched to their sides like saddlebags. They were no more than a few yards away, but walked past their hiding spot without any reaction.

Derring-Do peered after them. "Good eyes on you."

"Fly through enough snow and rain, and you get an instinct for it... it's called 'keeping a weather eye'." Rainbow Dash leaned close and whispered, "I thought you said this place would be empty at night?"

"It was supposed to be," Derring said. "You'd have to be crazy to come down here after sundown."

"We came down here, didn't we?"

"Only for a short while," said Derring. "They must be patrolling at regular intervals."

"Or maybe they saw the elevator and thought somepony got lost."

"If that's the case, the first thing they'll do is go to the zeppelin and do a head-count... and the first thing they'll find is our empty bunk-rooms."

"We'd better make this quick, then!"

Rainbow Dash darted out of the hiding spot and followed the walkway, and Derring Do stayed close behind her. They dodged two more patrols with ease, but hunkered down when they caught sight of the cave entrance: there were a pair of stallions standing by the heavy tarp curtains, standing watch.

"Guards!?" Rainbow Dash said. "This is getting silly! What are they worried about down here?"

"Oh no," Derring hissed. "This is worse than I thought."

"What? Is it pirates? Smugglers? Secret agents?"

"Worse. Mall cops. Walski's investors must be richer than I thought... they probably sent a privately funded security team to make sure everything goes smoothly."

"...Isn't security a good thing?"

Derring shook her head. "It's a huge waste of time and resources. All they care about is making sure the investors get their money's worth. They're probably driving the professor crazy, poking their noses into everything like this. She must be under a great deal of pressure."

"That's no excuse for doing a half-flanked rush-job."

"I never said it was!" hissed Derring.

"Quiet!" Dash said. "We need to figure out how to get inside."

"All right... inside. Inside. Hm."

Derring turned to watch as half a dozen guards marched past them, two-by-two, heading towards the caves.

"I have an idea... follow my lead."

As soon as the guards marched past Derring-Do rushed out of the snow and walked right behind them, matching their gait and posture. Rainbow Dash fell in beside her and did the same. The guards marched right up to the cavern entrance and walked inside, and the two watch-ponies waved them through without a second glance. They passed through several of the heavy weather-curtains, and Derring-Do simply stayed behind the last of the curtains.

Rainbow Dash listened as the tromping hooves faded into the distance. "I can't believe that worked."

Derring-Do peeked through the edge of the curtain, then pulled it aside and stepped into the empty cave. "We gotta be as quiet as possible here. Any sound we make could echo for miles."

"Do we know what we're looking for?"

"Not exactly," Derring said, "but I'll know it when I see it."

Derring walked along the minecart rails and followed them deeper into the caves. They caught sight of a few other ponies: not all of them were big, bulky stallions, but their heavy winter coats made it impossible to tell who they were. Derring-Do nudged Rainbow Dash, then nodded to a corridor to their right. They turned towards it together, walking casually. The ponies here were too busy examining engraved stones and sorting through crates of rubble to notice them.

Just as they entered the corridor, the sound of tromping hooves approached from somewhere ahead. Rainbow Dash pumped her wings and flew straight up, pressing herself flat against the ceiling. She clenched her teeth and stared down at Derring-Do, completely exposed in the middle of the corridor.

Derring turned to examine a completely unremarkable patch of stone wall to her left, stroking her chin and muttering 'hmm'. A few seconds later, Dash watched a row of six guards march past in single file. Derring ignored them completely, and they returned the sentiment. None of them happened to glance up at the ceiling.

Dash waited a few more seconds, then dropped down from the ceiling. "I can't believe that worked."

"It's harder to find what you're not looking for." Derring continued walking down the corridor. "This way. It can't be much further."

Dash followed after her, glancing behind them every now and then. "I remember this place from the tour... it's where I saw the real-life ruins. Is that what you're looking for?"

"Yes. Walski said that they've only found one example of proper architecture. It's not much, but it's better than noth—"

Her voice trailed off as she entered the last of the natural rock caves. Ahead of them, visible through a large jagged hole in the wall, was a stone brick hallway. There were carved columns at regular intervals, with alcoves between them that held odd little statues... not ponies, or creatures of any sort. Just abstract, geometric shapes with sweeping, swirling surfaces. They took off their breathing masks and pulled their hoods back.

"This is as far as my tour got," Rainbow Dash said. "They let me look through the hole in the wall, but they wouldn't let me go in. I figured fair was fair."

Dash looked back at Derring, who was staring straight ahead in a daze.

"Hey," Dash said, "are we going in there?"

Derring scraped the tip of her boot against the jagged opening. "Dynamite..."

Dash walked up beside her, speaking softly. "Is this sort of thing illegal?"

"No. It's just..." She let out a wet sniffle. "I can't believe I looked up to her."

Dash glanced back, but saw nopony sneaking up behind them. "So..."

"Right." Derring-Do's voice flattened completely, and she climbed through the hole. "Stay with me, but be careful."

Dash nodded, and followed her inside. The hallway was wide enough for them to walk side by side, and there were short little cross-ways at regular intervals: the side halls were all quite short, but decorated with the same pattern of columns and alcoves. Before long, they came to the innermost area: a medium-sized room with a vast array of engravings on the facing wall.

"It's Aduu," Rainbow Dash said, stroking her chin dramatically, "but it's not a dialect I'm familiar with."

Derring glared at her for a moment, then broke into a smile. "Don't worry... technically, everything you said was correct."

"So it is Aduu? Does that mean this place was built by the Dzunturan?"

Derring stepped up to the wall and squinted at the columns of engravings. "It's definitely Aduu... but nopony is completely sure if that was really the language used by the Dzunturan. That's exactly the sort of missing link Walski is looking for: anything to connect the society to a location."

Dash walked up beside her. "She came an awful long way for that. That book you showed me before... the picture showed the city in the middle of a huge jungle."

"That was just a dramatization. It could be anywhere." She frowned at one of the columns. "The 'deep place'... or possibly 'sacred' place... where mystery becomes... liquid?"

"Is that what it says? Is it talking about this place?"

"Not sure. Aduu is a hybrid language: it combines hieroglyphic symbols with a complicated system of syntax. The words mean different things depending on how they're arranged." Derring Pointed at a symbol. "This one here, for example, is the symbol for light. But down here, the same symbol means magic... and here it means knowledge, awareness, or inspiration."

"I hate to be a wet blanket, but we are on a time budget here."

"Don't worry. I just have to figure out which passage I need to copy, so I can study it later." She took several sideways steps. "Place of rest for the object-which-is-inserted... either a key, or a weapon. That which creates the war-filled-with-peace..."

"That's messed up," said Rainbow Dash.

"Stone-heart of many stone-hearts, from the place of... the place of..." Derring-Do frowned intently. "The life-place of quiet-sleeping-still liquid...?"

Rainbow Dash stood beside her and waited, bouncing slightly on the tips of her hooves.

Derring-Do cleared her throat. "Could you please... give me a bit of space to think, perhaps?"

"Oh... right. Anywhere in particular?"

"Just stand in the corner," she said, "and don't touch anything."

Dash nodded, and backed away into the corner in question. There was a tiny clunk as her left hind hoof pressed one of the floor tiles a half-inch into the floor. Her eyes shot wide open and her back snapped ramrod straight.

"Let's see now," Derring muttered. " 'Life-place' could mean any number of things... but how does it relate to 'quiet-sleeping-still'?"

Rainbow Dash's eyes flicked side to side. The rest of her remained perfectly still.

"Or maybe that's in the wrong order... maybe it's actually 'mystery-place' of life-sleeping-still' liquid?"

"Derring?" Rainbow Dash hissed through clenched teeth. "I think I—"

"Ut-ut, I've almost... aha!" Derring pointed at a second column. "It's a double play on words... very clever! This part means 'place of living,' and this here means... 'still waters'."

"Derring? I really, really think you should—"

"City!" Derring spun around and smiled at her. "The City of Still Waters! There really is a lost city around here somewhere !"

"That's great I stepped on something."

She stared at her, aghast. "Dash! You promised to be careful!"

"It wasn't—!"

The room shuddered violently, and the floor beneath them crumbled apart all at once. Derring-Do let out a piercing squeal as she plummeted down into the shadowy pit below: Rainbow Dash remained standing on empty air for only a second, and then dove down after her as fast as she could. Derring's terrified scream reverberated off the narrow walls, somewhere in the distance.

After a few seconds of freefall, Rainbow Dash felt the vertical tunnel curve to one side: she turned in midair and slid against the smooth stone tile, tucking her wings close to keep them safe. After numerous twisting turns, she tumbled out into an open space and slid to a halt flat on her belly.

Rainbow Dash let out a groan and stood upright, looking around. She was standing on a large stone bridge that reached across a vast, subterranean canyon: a massive vertical crack deep under the mountain. She could see the end of the slide right behind her, now blocked off by a huge circular slab. The air here was swelteringly hot: she looked down each side of the canyon and saw numerous fountains built against the natural rock, each releasing a stream of glowing, molten lava. She peered over the edge of the bridge, but could see no bottom.

"Derring-Do?" she shouted. "Are you okay? Say something!"

No voice answered her. She walked further across the bridge and saw Derring-Do pressed up against a vertical stone column on the side of the bridge. She was hugging it with all four limbs, her pupils were tiny dots and her breathing was rapid and shallow.

"Derring!" Rainbow Dash ran to her side and checked her over. "It's okay, Derring! You're fine. Everything's fine. We'll figure a way out of this."

Derring said nothing, and continued to hug the stone.

"Okay, let's get you away from the edge of the bridge."

Dash gave her a gentle tug, and then a firm pull, but she continued to cling to the pillar. Dash tried to pry her hooves loose, but her grip was like a steel vice.

"Okay, Derring... you're gonna have to let go eventually."

Derring's voice was soft and uneven. "Nope nope nope nope nope nope..."

"Well... all right." Rainbow Dash pumped her wings and hovered over the edge of the bridge. "I'll go ahead and scout out the—"

"Aaaaaaah-no-no-no-please don't go anywhere!"

She landed on the bridge. "Oh... kay."

Derring cleared her throat. "Just... give me a moment. To... compose myself."

Dash sat down beside her. "Take as long as you need."

After a couple minutes, Derring's breathing slowed and her pupils dilated. She shuffled sideways, and Rainbow Dash helped pull her away from the edge of the bridge. Derring flopped on her back and gasped for breath.

"This is all your fault," she said.

Dash rolled her eyes. "You were the one who told me to stand in the corner."

"Why'd you come after me?" Derring-Do shouted. "If you had just stayed up there, you could have gone for help! Instead, we're both trapped down here! Nopony even knows where we went!"

Rainbow Dash stood up. "I didn't want to leave you alone. You might have been hurt."

"Which is exactly why you should go for help!"

"We stick together, and that's that." Dash stood up and nodded to the far side of the bridge. "You got any torches on you? I wanna see where this thing leads."

Derring staggered upright, knees wobbling. "How can you be so calm and placid at a time like this!? We're in the depths of a lost, forgotten ruins, miles below the surface, with no food or water or medicine, no survival tools, and absolutely no hope of rescue!"

Rainbow Dash calmly turned to look at her. "Miss Do... I'm the element of Loyalty. You know what I call this?"

"A disaster? A catastrophe? A horrible, lingering death?"

"I call it Tuesday. Now do you have any torches, or not?"

Derring gave her a slightly dizzy look. She used her wing to open her saddlebag, took out a plastic rod with a string loop on one end, and tossed it to Dash. She caught it and bent it halfway, then hung the loop of string around her neck. The mixture of chemicals let off a bright yellow glow.

"Thanks. You better wear one yourself. Makes it easier to keep track of you." She tugged at the thick, wool collar of her heavy winter coat. "You know what? Let's pack these up for now... it's like a sauna in here."

"You don't have the slightest clue where you're going or what your doing, do you?"

"Of course I do," Rainbow Dash said, "I'm doing what Daring Do would do in a situation like this."

"You're looking to a nonexistent pony for inspiration!? You're going to get us both killed!!"

"You know, if it weren't for your horrible, close-minded attitude and your rude and disgusting personality, you could be just like her. You could be a real-life Daring Do—just as amazing and cool and legendary as anything in the stories—if you could do just one little thing."

"Do I even want to know?"

Rainbow Dash paused to look back at her. "Never give up."

Derring-Do bit her bottom lip. Rainbow Dash continued walking across the bridge, and Derring followed after her.

Dash and Derring trotted through the brick-and-tile corridors that burrowed through the depths of the mountain. The turns were all perfect ninety-degree angles and many of the halls were two stories tall, with narrow balconies and bridges. They picked their path at random, but Derring was always careful to leave a chalk-mark arrow pointing back the way they'd came. She claimed to have a completely reliable system in place, and that was enough for Dash.

Her system gave them no sense of scale or direction: the catacombs were laid out like a series of mazes layered one on top of the other, interconnected by stairwells or two-story corridors. There were alcoves in the walls, like those above, except these had been placed with no obvious pattern. Instead of holding statute or engravings, they were empty and hollow... like windows opening into an oppressive darkness. They tossed a spare glow-stick into one, revealing a long, straight tunnel too narrow to crawl through. It was impossible to tell how far it went.

Rainbow Dash looked at a few of the other alcoves in the area. "It's definitely a network or something... maybe for moving fresh air around so ponies can breathe."

She jogged a few steps ahead. "The air is definitely getting colder the further in we go. yeah... it's definitely an air conditioning system. You know those giant skyscrapers in Manehattan? It takes a huge amount of work to pump fresh air in from the outside... they have to install tons of giant fans and big long ducts."

She glanced back, and saw Derring-Do trudging along. She looked a little dizzy, and her neck wobbled slightly as she moved. Her eyes darted towards every little sound that echoed back from the darkness.

"Hey! Derring-Do?"

Derring flinched. "What! Yes?"

"So what do you think of the alcoves? What're they for?"

Derring glanced around, nervously, and gave her a wordless little shrug.

"Come on! At least take a guess!"

"I think... they're way too small to be an air filtration system." Her lower lip trembled slightly. "Oh no... we're going to suffocate down here, aren't we? We're running out of air right now! We won't even have time to starve or dehydrate!"

"Relax already. We'll figure something out. With your brains and my instincts, we'll—"

"My brains!?" derring stamped a hoof. "I'm a professor! I sit behind a desk! This isn't my job at all!"

Rainbow Dash grabbed her shoulders and gave her a shake. "Listen to me! It's not your job, okay? It's mine. I'll worry about getting us out of here alive, and you worry about translating ancient inscriptions."

"There are no inscriptions here!"

"Well then, we'll keep looking." Dash let go of her and continued onward. "What about the inscriptions near the surface? Tell me all about those."

Derring rolled her eyes, but followed after her. "I didn't get a chance to read the whole thing, but it seemed like... a monument. It was talking about a place called the City of Still Waters, but this doesn't seem like a city at all."

"Oh? What does it seem like?"

"The inscription said it's a sacred resting place, whatever that means... I thought it might be a giant underground catacomb, but we haven't seen any graves or sarcophagi."

"So maybe 'resting place' means something else. Any ideas?"

"Place of rest... but not for ponies." Derring-Do frowned and nudged her helmet up. "It might be a storage place, like a secure vault or a long-term archive. Whatever it is, it would have to be very important: items or information that the builders would have considered sacred."

Rainbow Dash stopped in her tracks and perked her ears up. Derring-Do looked up just in time to avoid bumping into her.

"Something wrong?"

"Just a sec." Dash spread her wings out to each side, perfectly still. She closed her eyes and leaned her head back. She stayed like that for several seconds, basking in something invisible.

"That way," she said, tilting her head without opening her eyes. "The air's getting cooler from that direction. Let's check it out."

"That's it? That's all you have to go on?"

"The temperature is changing, but there's no breeze. I think that's weird enough to investigate."

They continued on, using Rainbow Dash's finely tuned weather sense as a compass. Derring-Do continued to mark each crossroads with a chalkmark arrow, just as before, but the sense of purpose gave them both a quicker step. It wasn't much, but it was better than nothing at all.

Part 8: "So, should we start looking for—whoa, back up a bit there! Horrible death-curse!?"

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After half an hour of slow, cautious walking, Derring-Do rushed ahead and pointed at a section of wall. "There! Look! There's a symbol here! Quickly!"

Without being asked, Rainbow Dash took a fresh glowstick in her mouth and held it over Derring's shoulder.

"Finally, some useful information. This resting place isn't just a vault or an archive... it's a cradle. A place of recovery and recuperation, but not for any living thing..."

"Maybe it's a recharging station or something? Like the kind they have for magic crystals that run out of energy."

"Exactly. It refers to a stone of some sort... a key-stone, or a star-stone..." Derring-Do looked down the hall. "And it's that way!"

She scrambled up and ran down the hallway, with rainbow Dash gliding after her. She paused every so often to glance at the walls and leave behind chalk-marks, but never quite came to a complete stop. Within a minute, they arrived at a long stone bridge. This one also spanned the facing walls of a vast, vertical crevice, but the air here was frigid. Instead of lava fountains, the walls were decorated with massive ice formations. The ceiling far above them was the glistening underbelly of a subterranean glacier. Below them was a shadowy, bottomless pit.

"Talk about hot and cold," Rainbow Dash said as she gazed all around. "This is crazy... there should be all sorts of weather problems, but the air pressure is perfectly smooth."

Derring-Do jogged across the bridge. "Come on: whatever this key-stone is, it's right ahead of us."

"Hey, whoa, hold up there!" Rainbow Dash flew ahead and dropped down in front of her. "The weather system in this place is way too weird and impossible! Doesn't that seem a little suspicious? We can't just go bumbling in there!"

Derring-Do stared at her for a moment. She finally took off her hat and gave Dash a quizzical look.

"What?"

"After everything that's happened—all the impossible, dangerous, ridiculous things we've seen today—this is what makes you hesitate?"

"Well... I mean..." Rainbow Dash looked away. "This is different. I know weather."

"I suppose it's harder to be brave when you truly understand how bad things are."

"I guess," said Dash. She took a deep breath and walked forward. "But you don't call Rainbow Dash for the easy stuff."

Derring watched her walk ahead. She shook her head, but followed after.

After they crossed the bridge, there were no corners or crossroads to choose from. The corridor led them straight to a massive circular hall, arranged like an arena or a full-circle theatre: the tiled floor sloped down like a shallow bowl and there was a huge stone pillar in the very center.

Rainbow Dash let out a long, low whistle.

"Now this is more like it," Derring said. She walked along the edge of the theatre and examined the walls: almost every section was covered with giant engravings. "These aren't just writings. They look like instructions, or... or maybe formulae. This must have been some sort of workshop or laboratory."

"Anything useful? Like an exit?"

"Instructions... instructions..." Derring walked further along the edge of the room. "Ah, directions! There's a map of the whole complex, right here. Frightfully convenient of them, I must say. It looks like..." Derring let out a groan and slapped herself in the face.

Dash flew over to her. "What? What's wrong?"

"The floor tiles!" she said. "Some of the floor-tiles are twice as large as the others... and the decorative pattern points the way to the exit. How could I be so stupid!"

"Don't be so hard on yourself. They didn't look anything at all like arrows."

"I didn't find what I wasn't looking for... serves me right." She tugged her hat tight. "No need to dwell on the past."

"What about all the rest of these inscriptions?" said Dash. "Do they explain anything?"

"It looks like they explain everything." Derring Do examined the adjoining inscriptions, speaking as she walked. "This place really is the 'City of Still Waters,' even though 'city' isn't the right translation. It's not quite a workshop, and it's not quite a laboratory... it's something in between."

"Maybe It's a university," said Dash.

Derring-Do shot her a surprised look. "You're right... it just might be! But 'School of Still Waters' doesn't make any sense in their language. The liquid-water-mystery symbol matches up, but the still-quiet-secret symbol makes no sense given that particular context."

Derring-Do quickened her pace and pointed at the next inscription.

"This passage mentions the 'key-stone' or 'star-stone'. It was stored here when not in use, but it doesn't explain what it's supposed to do... just something about limitless cosmic power, and a horrible death-curse. Nothing too interesting."

"Oh." Rainbow dash glanced around the hall. "So, should we start looking for—whoa, back up a bit there! Horrible death-curse!?"

"Yeah," Derring-do said, "just your average run-of-the-mill superstition."

Dash bolted to her side, every limb tense. "Just what sort of curse are we talking about here, anyways?"

Derring rolled her eyes. "I like how you didn't even notice the mention of limitless cosmic power."

"No, seriously. What's up with this curse?"

"The inscription says that some sort of horrible, terrible curse will all on anypony who attempts to use 'key-stone' or remove it from it's rightful resting place. But it's all just superstitious clop-trap, designed to frighten grave robbers and plunderers."

Rainbow Dash stamped a hoof and glared at her. "We can't take it, and that's final!"

Derring-Do blinked at her for a moment. "Okay."

"What? Really?"

"I doubt we'll need to take it anywhere. All we need is to take a look at it, search for clues, and be on our way. All things considered, we should leave the ruins just as we found them."

"Well... great. Good." Rainbow Dash rubbed her nose. "So, how do we find it?"

Derring Pointed at the vertical pillar that ran through the very center of the hall. "There should be a switch of some sort on that pillar... but the tiles on the floor are all pressure-plates. They might be traps, or just a part of some enormous mechanism... either way, we can't afford to trigger the wrong tiles."

"Huh... so how do we get across?"

"Why don't you take this one yourself?" Derring-Do said and gave her a pat on the back. "I think your unique talents are up to the task."

"Wow, really?" Dash grinned at her and issued a salute. "I won't let you down, Derring. I'll figure this out if it's the last thing I do!"

"Well, it shouldn't be that—"

Rainbow Dash ran to the edge of the floor tiles and hunkered down, examining the patterns. "Lets see... one, two, three, four... there's eight unique patterns in total. Half of them are made of straight lines, and the other half are curvy..."

"Dash? You're overthinking things a bit."

"No-no-no, I got this." Dash stood up. "The pillar is covered with tiles, with all the same patterns... so stepping on a tile must affect a different part of the pillar in some way."

Derring-Do walked up beside her. "Dash. Think before you think."

She stared at the pillar. After several long seconds, she bopped herself in the nose. "Right... right. Silly me." She spread her wings and flew over to the pillar.

"The switch should be near the bottom," Derring called out. "It'll be a push block... not hidden, but very plain looking."

"Here we go," Dash said and hovered lower. "I only see one of them."

"One less decision for us to make, I suppose. Go ahead and push it in. Gently."

Rainbow Dash nudged the stone block and pushed it into the column. The sound of heavy, grinding stone filled the air, and a section of the wall opened wide and bathed the theatre in a cascade of colorful light.

Rainbow Dash turned in midair, gawking at the countless beams of color shining against the walls and ceiling. "This is amazing!"

Derring-Do galloped along the edge of the room and ran to the freshly opened alcove. "Dash? Something tells me you're going to want to see this for yourself."

Dash flew to her side, and the two ponies gazed in awe at the source of the light: a large, triangular prism sitting on a tiny stone altar. The prism was perfectly clear, like diamond, but a beam of light from above made it glow like a thing of solid energy. It was the size of a loaf of bread.

"So is this a key-stone, or a star-stone?" Rainbow Dash whispered.

Derring-Do leaned closer, examining the inscriptions along the tiny altar. "Lapis Philosophorum... I don't believe this. It's a philosopher's stone."

"You mean the secret to immortality?" Dash stared at the prism, slack jawed. "Do you think it's the genuine article?"

"Whoever built this place certainly must have thought so," she said, "and it looks exactly like the one Prince Gallium used for his alchemical machine."

"Yeah, but super-sized." Dash squinted at the stone. "The philosopher's stone of legend could be used to make three different substances: Alkahest, the universal solvent that could corrode any substance... Azoth, a medicinal substance that could cure anything... and Gold, the rarest and most precious metal of the ancient era."

"And we know for certain that Prince Gallium's crystal can be used to make medicine. There might just be some truth to this old chestnut of a legend." Derring turned to look at her. "Wait... how do you know all that?"

"Book twelve of the expanded universe," Dash said. "They go looking for the Philosopher's stone to save Gearbox's life. He used to be a villainous smuggler, but now he's her bad-boy love interest. One of them, anyways."

Derring glowered at her. "You're just spouting what you got out of a fictional novel? I should have guessed."

"After I read the book, I was so curious that I did some research about the 'real life' philosopher's stone. It never really existed, of course, so all those ancient legends about it were fictional to begin with. I guess you only hate modern make-believe stories."

Derring-Do looked away.

"Look, forget I said anything. Are there any clues about how to get out of here?"

"Yes... yes." She looked back at the center of the theatre. "There's a combination of numbers and symbols here. I think if we hit the right tiles in the right order, something should happen."

"...Something?"

"Something useful," Derring said. She pointed at an inscription inside the alcove. "This word translates to 'evacuation' or 'escape'."

Rainbow Dash took to the air and hovered over the thousands of floor tiles surrounding the pillar. "Then what are we waiting for? Just tell me where to step!"

"All right... it uses a system of latitude and longitude. There should be one tile with a plain triangle on it, right near the pillar. Hit that one once."

Dash hovered side to side for awhile, then dropped down to step on one of the tiles with her hind leg. It sank into the ground, then lifted back into place when she let go. "Hey, it's all springy and stuff!"

"All right, now... with your back to the pillar... go three tiles to the left, and then twelve forward."

"Right... right... three, twelve..." She stepped on another tile. "Done!"

"Now, go eight tiles to the left, and go backwards—towards the pillar, that is—until you find a tile that looks like a... like a little bird or something. It'll look upside-down to you."

"Like a humming-bird, you mean?"

"Yeah, that's the one."

Rainbow Dash pressed the third tile and something under the floor began grinding against something else. There were a series of long, drawn-out clicks, and the sound of gravel trickling down. The pillar in the center of the room rotated in place, and a tight beam of light shot out of the prism and shone against it's surface.

"Now that's what I call 'something'," Dash called out. "What now?"

"Well... I guess we wait. Maybe there's an elevator or something."

They looked around the room for a while. The deep, mechanical noises continued to rumble through the floor, growing ever louder.

Dash's ear twitched. "...Did you hear that?"

"What was that?" Derring-Do shouted back. "Did you say something?"

"It sounded like..." Dash looked at the entrance. "What did you say this place was called?"

"The something-something of Still Waters. Why?"

"And what was Prince Gallium using his prism for?"

"An alchemical... distillery."

"So," Dash said, "we've got lots of underground halls, with a lava-crevice on one side..."

"...and a glacier-crevice on the other," Derring finished.

They both stared at the theatre's exit. Gradually, a roaring rush of water began to drown out the mechanical chaos. They snapped to look at each other, eyes wide. "We're in a still!" they shouted together.

A tidal wave of frigid water poured into the room and splashed into the bowl-shaped depression around the pillar, seeping in between the pressure plates and filling up the room.

"We gotta get out of here!" Rainbow Dash shouted. "We've got five seconds, tops!"

"Right!" Derring-Do swiped the prism out of the alcove and tossed it into her saddlebag. "Lead the way, Dash!"

"Aaah no the horrible death-curse!" Dash shouted. "Why did you even do that? What is wrong with you!?"

"That's my problem now," she said as she ran along the edge of the room. "You just worry about getting us out of here alive!"

Rainbow Dash flew directly over her. "Here! Grab my hooves!"

Derring-Do jumped up and hooked her ankles against Dash's, and promptly pulled her to the ground like an anchor. Rainbow Dash clenched her teeth and flapped her wings, with no success.

"Jeez, you weigh a ton!"

"Well excuse me! I've never had to be buoyant or aerodynamic before!" Derring yelped as the water lapped against her boot. "Do something do something do something!"

"Okay, just hold on... and brace your hooves as hard as you can!"

Rainbow Dash flapped her wings, flying forward instead of up, and dragged her along the wet, slippery floor. She swept low over the deluge of incoming water, and Derring-Do's rubber-soled boots skipped over the surface like clumsy, awkward skis. Dash and Derring skimmed against the current and came to the bridge across the chasm: the icy buildup was collapsing all around them, and the belly of the glacier above groaned and creaked. Dash struggled to keep Derring in the center of the bridge before the water swept her over the edge. Several flat chunks of ice landed in their way and Derring managed to stamp her hind hooves firmly against one of them, standing on it like a surfboard

"The lights!" Derring shouted. "There's beams of light all through the crevice!"

"No time to worry about that!" Dash shouted. "we gotta... oh-geez-you-gotta-be-kidding-me!!"

As they zoomed back through the maze of corridors, the deep shadowy alcoves burst to life: narrow beams of white-hot light shot out of and into each set of alcoves, filling the corridor with tripwires at various heights. Whenever the water splashed against the beams, they seared with bubbles and steam.

"Aaahhh jump jump jump!"

Derring kicked off of her icy surfboard just as a beam slipped beneath them, burning the very tip of her tail to a crisp. She planted her hooves back onto the ice. A second later, she let go of Dash's forelegs and flattened herself against the ice just in time for a beam to pass above her, missing her helmet by a matter of inches.

"Left!" Derring shouted. "We gotta take the next left! Follow the tiles!"

"We don't even know where we are!"

"We have to go somewhere, don't we!?"

Rainbow Dash tilted to the left and pulled Derring-Do as hard as she could. The slab of ice swerved around the corner and smashed against the stone wall, breaking a chunk off the side.

"Now right!" Derring shouted.

Rainbow Dash heaved to the right, but the rushing rapids were too powerful. The deluge pulled them straight ahead and into unfamiliar territory.

"Aaah! Other right! Other Right!"

"I can't!" Dash said. "It's too—"

They both stared, aghast, at a whole wall of light-beams directly ahead: They closed off the entire corridor like the bars of a prison cell, packed much too tightly to fly between.

"Whelp, I'm officially outta ideas," said Dash.

Derring-Do pursed her lips for a moment, then took the enormous prism out of her saddlebag. "Stay behind me." She braced herself for the onrushing wall of light. Just as they approached, she leaped forward and held the prism in front of her: the translucent object touched the beam and instantly redirected it back against the wall, where it cut through the stone like a hot knife through butter. The beam sizzled out, and Derring-Do dove through the tiny gap like an olympic high-diver. The top of her helmet was scorched and blackened but she slipped through in one piece.

Rainbow Dash slipped in behind her easily. The chunk of ice shattered and melted completely, and Derring landed in the water. Dash tried to grab hold of her, but the waves pulled her back and forth too randomly to keep track of.

"Hold on, Derring! I've almost got you!"

Derring’s face broke the surface of the water, and she gasped for breath. "The stone! Take it!"

"You've still got that thing? Let go of it!"

"No! I can't! I won't!"

"It's just a chunk of rock!" Dash shouted. "It's gonna get you killed!"

Derring sputtered as she was pulled under the waves. Dash's eyes flicked over the dark, glacial water, searching for the faint yellow flicker of her glowstick necklace. She caught sight of a shape thrashing about, and dove into the waves after it. The frigid liquid sluiced straight through her coat and sent a shiver through her bones, but she managed to grab hold of Derring-Do's sopping wing.

Sorry, Derring, but I think this is gonna hurt...

She dove up and out of the water like a salmon leaping upstream, and heaved with all her strength: Derring-Do broke the surface with a gasp of air and let out a visceral scream of pain as Dash dragged her along by her crippled wing. A moment later, the water swept them into a vertical shaft and engulfed them both completely. The flow was powerful enough to surge upwards: it was all they could do to cling to each other and hold their breath as the current carried them up through the mountains like a waterspout.

Eventually the water swept them sideways, then down along a curved slide. They gasped for breath and winced in pain as daylight blinded them: they slid down along a snowbank and skidded to a halt on the rocky outcropping where the expedition had set up camp. After some hacking and coughing, they both looked up to see a semicircle of grim, uniformed security stallions, all pointing huge metal crossbows with rotary loading mechanisms. The weapons clicked menacingly as they were brought to bear.

Professor Walski stepped out from the semicircle. "Miss Do?"

Derring-Do scrambled to her feet. "No wait! I can explain everything!"

A thunderclap sounded across the mountainside and the ground quaked under their hooves. Two of the smaller mountain peaks behind them collapsed completely, and a mile-long jet of volcanic steam and ash spewed into the atmosphere. The entire eastern side of the mountain gave way to a titanic avalanche.

The armed guards all turned to stare at the catastrophic damage, slack jawed.

Professor Walski turned to Derring-Do. "So. I've heard you can explain everything."

Derring-Do glanced left and right with a nervous little smile. "Well okay, but we found the Philosopher's Stone."

Walski frowned at her. "The what?"

"No, really!" Derring-Do held up the clear crystal prism, completely undamaged by the escape. "There was a—"

A metal claw shot forward and clamped around the prism. A spool of chain immediately yanked it back before Derring could react: A black stallion in a black longcoat hefted an enormous grapple-grabber-gun and passed the prism to Walski.

"Hey! That's our prism!" Rainbow Dash leaped up, but settled down as the security guards all readied their rotary-crossbows. "...That you can totally borrow, no big deal."

Professor Walski examined the prism for a moment, then passed it back to the black stallion in the black longcoat. "Take this to my office in the Imbrium. I'll examine it later."

"I'm terribly sorry we ruined your ruins," said Derring, "but at least you've got a prism thingy to show for it. And that's a good thing. Right?"

Professor Walski fixed her with smoldering glare. "Oh, don't you worry...I know exactly what's going to happen to the two of you."

Dash and Derring glanced at each other.

Half an hour later, after a warm bath and a bowl of hot soup, Rainbow Dash slammed her suitcase shut and left her quarters. Derring-Do joined her in the hallway and a pair of stern guards escorted them to the docking hangar where their airplane was stowed. Professor Walski was already waiting for them as they arrived.

"Since there are no more ruins for my expedition to survey, the Imbrium has set course for the next potential site." She nodded to their Goldfinch tilt-rotor airplane. "You're in no condition to pilot, so I'm sending one of my own officers to escort you directly to Canterlot. There will be no other stops along the way. I am giving him a hoof-written report to deliver to the university, after which I am quite certain the dean will have a conversation with you that you will not like."

Derring took off her scorched helmet and kept her eyes down. "Yes'm. Sorry ma'am."

"Not as sorry as you should be, young filly. I cannot imagine what your parents would think of this debacle." Walski's voice softened somewhat. "...Gods rest their souls."

Derring stared at her hooves.

Walski turned to Dash. "And what about you? Anything to say for yourself?"

"We coulda both been killed back there, you know."

"Of course you could have. Because you wandered into a hazardous, uncharted area without asking for permission, or even telling anypony you were leaving. You're not a child anymore. Take some responsibility for your actions. And for goodness sake, stop filling poor Miss Do's head with such irresponsible nonsense: she had a perfectly rational head on her shoulders before you came along and filled it up with childish fantasies."

Rainbow Dash ground her teeth together, but stopped when she heard a slight sniffle from Derring-Do. She took her by the shoulder and helped her into the plane. As soon as they went inside, Derring-Do trudged to the folding bench on the wall and flopped on her side. Dash watched her for awhile, and occasionally glanced at the map on the wall.

"I'm sorry I got you into all this," she said. "We almost drowned, or froze, or whatever. I just wanted to visit some real-life ruins, and we ended up blowing them up. I never meant or any of this to happen."

Derring-Do sighed. "You've sure been apologizing to me a lot, lately."

"Yeah, well... it seems like I've been messing things up a lot, lately. I guess I like to fly by the seat of my pants, taking life one day at a time. But I guess that doesn't work for most normal ponies."

They watched each other for awhile.

"I'm glad I came here," said Derring-Do. "It was fun. In a way."

"You... can't be serious."

"We found a priceless artifact in those catacombs. A real, honest-to-goodness ancient treasure. It's the sort of find that only happens once in a lifetime... and it was you and me that found it."

"Yeah, well, Perez is the one who's gonna go down in history for it." Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes and sat at the tiny, fold-out kitchen table. "You even gave her all the notes you took in the ruins. She'll get credit for everything."

"It was her dig, and it was her discovery to begin with. But that doesn't matter." She rolled onto her back and stared at the roof of the plane. "I still got a chance to touch it... to carry it... even for just a few minutes."

Dash smiled at her. "So... what now?"

"I just want to go home... maybe stay in bed for a whole week straight."

Rainbow Dash stood up and went to the cockpit, but both of the seats were empty.

"Hey, where's the pilot? I thought Perez wanted us out of her mane as fast as possible."

Derring-Do mumbled something, already half asleep.

Rainbow Dash walked to the side door, but the lever refused to open. "Hey, how do I open the..." Her voice trailed off as she glanced through the window and caught sight of a black stallion standing by the gantry, dressed in a long-black coat. He was standing by a panel of heavy switches, smiling... it was a smarmy sort of smile, the sort ponies wore when they were laughing too loudly at their own bad jokes. He looked up at her, gave her a brief little wave, and pulled one of the switches.

Dash yelped as the floor gave way beneath her. She slammed up against the ceiling and slid towards the front cabin next to where Derring-Do had landed in a panic. Dash looked up into the cockpit and saw white skies all around, with the shining silver zeppelin growing ever more distant with each passing second. The plane tumbled about wildly as it plummeted to the ground far below.

Part 9: "It was an accident. That's all. Nothing more."

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Rainbow Dash slid across the roof of the plane and slammed against the wall. The plane continued to tumble, and a heap of kitchenware spilled out of an unlocked shelf and clattered against her: a heavy frying-pan slammed into her face and sent a cascade of sparkly flashes bursting across her view. She shook her head and grabbed the wall, bracing herself tight.

"Derring!" she shouted. "The Cockpit!"

Derring-Do let out a squeal as she dangled from the edge of her sleeping cot, hanging upside down. "What did you do!? Why are we falling!?"

"We've got less than a minute before we hit the ground, and you're the only one who can fly this thing!"

Derring kicked her back legs wildly as she clung to the bed. "This can't be happening... it can't be!"

"Get to the cockpit!" Rainbow Dash roared.

After a moment's hesitation, Derring-Do let go of her cot and began scrambling for the front of the plane. The aircraft tilted violently and she slammed up against the wall, screaming as her crippled wing took the brunt of the impact.

Rainbow Dash kicked off the nearby wall and grabbed hold of her. Using her wings to stabilize them both, she managed to push Derring into the cockpit. She clung to the seat and climbed into it, even as the plane tilted nose down: she braced her hooves against the control panels and pushed herself into place.

"Okay! Okay! Gotta start the engine!" Derring-Do shouted. "Gotta remember the checklist! Item one: make sure the seat harness is secure!"

She fumbled with the harness for a second, but Rainbow Dash grabbed her from behind and began buckling her in place. "Just get on with it!"

"Okay! Okay! Item two: Make sure the fuel selector valve is on full! If we have two full fuel tanks, we can turn the selector to either side, or straight up! We wanna make sure the selector is set to up and on, so we can use both tanks! Then we wanna make sure the power-grid and avionics control systems are all off, so we don't overload any of our radios..."

Rainbow Dash finished clasping her harness, and glanced out of the front window: the zeppelin was just a tiny, silver dot, and it was impossible to tell how close the thick white fog was.

"We don't have time for a checklist!" Dash shouted. "Start this thing now!"

"Right! Right!" Derring reached for a lever with a bright orange button on the end. She pressed the button and pushed the lever into the panel. "This controls the amount of fuel that goes to the engine! We're gonna make sure it's 'full forward', or 'rich', so we have the most fuel going to the engine... the most fuel... the most. Okay, the fuel gauge isn't going up. Why isn't the fuel gauge going up?"

"This better be important, Derring!"

Derring-Do sighed, sounding mildly irritated. "There is no fuel. We're empty."

The plane rotated around, pointing straight down. Rainbow Dash braced herself against the door and spread her wings, stabilizing herself. "We gotta do something, Derring! Think of something! Start thinking right now!"

"We... we gotta..." She slapped her helmet. "Right! Our magi-crystals are still fully charged, so we can still operate the maneuvering controls!"

She pulled a lever, and the plane's tilt-rotor wings moved into a forward facing position. The tumbling stopped, but they began plummeting even faster. Derring grabbed the throttle and pulled towards herself

"Glide, darn-it! Glide! It's just like coming out of a stall, darn-it!" Derring looked to the left wing. "It's not working. The aileron isn't working! Why isn't the aileron working!? Okay, don't panic... maybe it's just the one." Derring looked to the right wing and wiggled the controls. "Nope... they're both broken. Hokay then."

"What now!?"

"Parachute! Get me a parachute from the back and prepare to abandon ship!"

Rainbow Dash sped to the back of the plane, flying through the claustrophobic interior as quickly as she dared. She scanned the cargo section up and down, checking all the secured crates and duffel bags.

"I don't see any parachutes!" she shouted.

"Wow," Derring called back. "That is bad. Hey, do you think you can you carry me?"

"With your body weight?" she said, "not for more than a minute. I might be able to drop you off safely if we're over a body of water."

There as a moment of silence.

"Derring? Don't you quit on me, okay?"

"It's not over yet!" she shouted back. "I think I can do this by moving the tilt-rotors manually, but first I'll need you to give me somethin."

"Name it!"

"A push," she said.

Rainbow Dash's eyes shot open. An instant later, she snatched a pair of flight goggles off the wall and flew to the door, but the lever refused to budge. Right... the exit's busted. How could I forget? She grabbed the emergency exit release and pulled it, but the bright red lever snapped off completely.

"Aargh! Stupid door!"

Dash braced her front hooves on the facing wall and kicked her hind legs against the door with all her strength, as rapidly as possible. The wall of the plane shuddered and shook, and a hiss of high-speed wind split the air: frigid air poured in through the tiny crack with alarming speed.

"Almost... almost!"

Dash gave one last heave, and the door broke off its hinges and sailed out of view. Dash leaped out of the door and immediately slammed into a gale-force hurricane. The plane sailed ahead of her, but she quickly regained her balance and streaked ahead of it like an arrow. She settled into position directly in front of its nose, matching its speed perfectly as it sailed straight down. She waved back at Derring-Do through the window: she waved back, and pointed up and to the left.

Dash she spread her wings wide and caught the wind, shaping the weather into a powerful wind tunnel and gently arcing it upwards. The plane shuddered behind her as the wind caught it, and the heavy bulk of its fuselage strained against the hastily sculpted weather pattern.

Unbelievable... how can something so heavy move so fast?

She tightened her control over the wind tunnel, straining with every muscle to keep the plane from breaking free. They began climbing up, one degree at a time, but not quickly enough: they plunged into the thick, white layer of fog that obscured the foot of the mountain. A shiver ran along Rainbow Dash's back as they hurtled through the air completely blind. She glanced back at the plane, and saw Derring-Do frantically waving for her to get out of the way. Rainbow Dash shook her head and kept the course.

At last, the plane leveled off. She slipped underneath it and slammed up against its belly, pushing as hard as she could. None of this will mean anything if we can't get out of the fog! We’ll either crash into the ground, or crash into a mountainside! She let out a roar and redoubled her effort, ignoring the glaze of ice and frost gathering on her feathers.

Something massive loomed through the fog beside her, easily the size of a skyscraper. Dash gasped in shock as several more towering pillars rushed past them: it was impossible to make out any details through the fog, and there was no warning whatsoever as they streaked onward: a huge, dark column appeared directly in front of them, impossible to avoid, and the plane crashed against its side with an explosive force. Rainbow Dash tumbled through the air, wildly out of control, and the last thing she saw was the Goldfinch snapped in half with cargo spewing from its aft section. A wave of intense heat washed over her, and her vision faded to black.

Rainbow Dash groaned as something tickled against her ear. She scrunched her eyes shut and waved it away, but the sensation persisted. The fog finally lifted from her mind, and a dull, throbbing pain washed over her body.

She muttered to herself and opened her eyes, but it took several seconds for her vision to clear up. When it did, she gazed around herself in amazement: she was in a jungle. Not just any jungle, either: the trees were the size of skyscrapers, and their lush green crowns were thick enough to form a ceiling. She could see up through the breaks in the foliage and saw the same white, cloudy mist as before, this time from below. Even in the middle of the day, it was dark and gloomy.

She tugged her flight goggles down and looked at herself: her limbs were tangled up in thick, leafy vines, and she was suspended more than a hundred meters off the ground. Her entire body was covered with sprains and bruises.

"Hello?" she called out. "Is anypony there?"

There was no response. Not even an echo. She tried to untangle herself, but cried out in pain as the vines tugged against her sides: both of her wings were badly sprained... possibly even broken.

"Of course they are," she muttered to herself. "Derring-Do? Can you hear me? Hello?"

She scanned the ground far below, watching for anything out of place. She saw one of the airplane's wings lodged against the side of a tree branch, shattered in half. Right below it, near the base of the tree, was the front half of the plane jutting out of the ground at a steep angle.

"Hang on, Derring!" she shouted. "I'll be down in just a minute!"

She struggled against the tangled knot of vines and managed to free her front legs, but swung over and dangled upside-down from her hind leg. She waved her front hooves desperately.

"Aaah! No, wait! Do-over!" She twisted around and grabbed at the vines again, and managed to regain her balance. "Okay, we're good... we're good. Yeah."

She clamped her teeth around a nearby vine, but her hind leg slipped free and the knot loosened: she swung down on the vine a considerable distance, came to a jarring halt, then swung down again in the other direction. She swung side to side, lower and lower, as the knot steadily unraveled and finally deposited her on the ground in a heap of bushes.

Rainbow Dash lay on her back and stared at the canopy far above, and managed to take a short, hissing breath. She sat upright and cradled one of her wings.

"Yeah. We're good." She stood up and made her way towards the remains of the crashed plane. "Derring-Do? You okay over there? I'm on my way now! Don't move, stay right where you are!"

Her journey was quick and straightforward: the ground-level foliage here was thinner than than that of a normal forest, and the land was surprisingly even. She could hear birds and animals in the distance, but couldn't see anything nearby. The only major obstacles were the roots of the titanic trees themselves: they were the size of whole buildings, with more than enough space to walk beneath them.

She came at last to the front half of the Goldfinch, suspended a scant few meters above the ground by a tangled net of vines. The wreckage groaned and creaked as it slowly swung side to side. The whole back half of the plane was completely missing, along with all of their cargo.

"Okay! Okay! Just gimme a second to—" She ran forward, but flinched back as her front hoof sank into swampy, wet mud, perfectly camouflaged under a thick layer of mossy undergrowth. She pumped her wings out of reflex and let out a cry of pain as the muscles twisted. She clenched her teeth and tried to step backwards: She pulled her foot out of the bog with a deep, wet squelch, and the fetid stench of rotting plant matter clung to her hoof.

"Okay... might take me a little longer than I thought. Just stay cool."

She walked around the plane, carefully testing the ground as she went. After walking to the other side, she caught sight of the plane's other wing leaning up against the trunk of the nearby tree. She climbed between it and the tree and gave it a push, and the hollow aluminum frame fell down against the surface of the bog with a loud slap.

"Now we're cookin' with oil," she said. She trotted across the makeshift bridge and climbed up onto the plane, using the tangled vines as a rope ladder. "Almost there, Derring. You got nuthin' to worry ab—"

One of the vines snapped under her hind hoof and she scrambled to regain her footing. A moment later, the plane gave out a low creak and shifted position. She clenched her teeth and froze in place.

Oh, no... no you don't. Don't you dare.

The plane slid down several inches, and the nose of the cockpit dipped into the surface of the bog. Rainbow Dash climbed up the plane and leaped inside, slipping on her muddy hoof: she fell straight into the cockpit and landed face-first against the slightly-cracked windshield. She stared at the pool of mud directly below them. She looked back and saw Derring-Do in the pilot's seat, slumped face-first against the controls. Her eyes were closed and there was a slight trickle of blood along her forehead. Dash pushed her back against the seat and tilted her head side to side.

Still breathing...

She unclasped Derring-Do's harness and slung her body across her back, wincing as she jostled her injured wings. She struggled to climb her way out of the steep, slippery plane, even as it slid deeper into the bog below. Mud flowed against the outside of the window, and the fractured glass quietly cracked and tinkled under the pressure. Dash moved carefully, like a water-strider insect balanced on the surface of a pool.

She reached the broken-off end of the plane, and paused to look below. Too far to jump, especially with this weight. There's no way I can climb down the vines while carrying her.

She looked back down through the interior of the plane. She reached over and took a chunk of metal wreckage in her mouth, then hurled it down into the cockpit below. It smashed the glass apart, allowing the slimy, fetid mud to rush inside. The plane tilted straight up and down and began sinking faster, but Dash stayed where she was. Once they were low enough, she simply hopped to the severed wing laying across the bog.

Their combined weight caused the end of the wing to plunge down like a see-saw. Dash scrambled to keep upright: her hind hooves slid back into the mud for a moment, but she managed to pull herself free and run along the wing. She leaped to solid ground and collapsed, gasping for breath. She turned and watched as the plane and its broken wing were swallowed up by the swamp... their communication and navigation gear, along with everything they'd packed for the journey, was gone without a trace.

Dash staggered upright and carefully rolled Derring onto her back. She opened her eyes, blearily, and let out a moan.

Dash patted her cheek. "Hey. How ya feeling?"

"Where... are we?"

"We, uh, kinda crashed." Dash wiped the sweat from her brow. "In a jungle."

"Where's the plane? The cargo?"

Dash bit her bottom lip. "You don't want to know. It's gross."

"I've..."

Derring coughed and sputtered, and Dash had to lean close to hear her voice.

"I've changed my mind," she said. "I'm not glad I came here."

An hour later, Derring Do lay under the shelter of a cluster of giant tree-roots. Her jacket was wide open and her coat was filthy with dirt and sweat. The air buzzed with insects the size of tea saucers, and distant roars and bird-calls echoed across the foliage.

Rainbow Dash climbed into their tiny shelter, wearing her goggles around her neck. She set a pair of saddlebags on the ground. "I've been searching for almost an hour, and this was all I could find. Sorry."

"Better'n nothing," Derring said. She opened the satchel and rummaged through its contents. "Spare notebook and grease pencil... magnetic compass... flare gun, with two flares... pocket watch, broken... flint and steel... kerosene lamp, broken but serviceable." She threw the empty bag aside. "No food, no water, no first aid kit. Great! Just great."

"We still have the air horns, and that little radio thingy you had with you."

"We're going to get two miles out of that thing, tops. The mountain is four miles up. We couldn't reach the HMS Imbrium even if they were directly above us."

Dash glanced out of the shelter, warily. "Are you good to walk?"

"Walk!?" Derring stood up and glared at her. "Just where do you think we're going to walk to? It'd take us three weeks to walk to the coast, even if there weren't a half-dozen mountain ranges zig-zagging back and forth in between!"

Dash walked to her and set a hoof on her shoulder. "We'll figure something out, okay? I promised I wouldn't let you die in the middle of nowhere, and I'm going to keep that promise."

Derring-Do shoved her hoof aside. "That's fantastic! I can trade dying in a plane crash for dying in a tropical jungle! At least a plane crash is over before you can feel anything: but death by exposure? Much more long and drawn out!"

"Would you calm down? We're not going to starve to death, okay?"

"You're right. It takes three for four weeks to starve to death... we're going to dehydrate long before that happens. Three days, tops."

Rainbow Dash gestured to the sky above. "This is the heaviest moisture I've ever seen in a ground atmosphere, so there'll be plenty of rain for us to drink. Now let's get moving already: if you're healthy enough to stand up and complain, you're certainly healthy enough to walk."

Derring-Do sputtered for a moment, glancing between Dash and the jungle. "This is the end, isn't it? I'm going to die in this jungle, and it's all your fault! You wanted to go one a real-life adventure, and you've gotten us both killed! How does it make you feel to know that your greatest hero, Derring-Do, is going to die in this horrible place!?"

Rainbow Dash watched her for a while, patiently.

"Are you done?"

Derring took several deep breaths. "Yeah. Let's go."

They walked along the forest floor, side by side, with Derring's tiny metal compass to guide the way. They walked at a steady pace for several minutes.

"Pretty easy terrain," Rainbow Dash said, "all things considering."

"It's the light level," Derring-Do said. "These jungle trees are so big that they choke out all the light... makes it impossible for smaller trees and shrubs to grow. They absorb most of the rainfall, too... but it doesn't look like it rains much up there."

"The mist isn't condensing," Dash said. "Even though it's freezing cold up there, and hot as a basement bakery down here, something's preventing the rain from forming."

"Might be the tree cover. Maybe these trees absorb dew right out of the clouds."

Rainbow Dash glanced around, casually. "You know a lot about jungles?"

"My first three assignments were in rainforests. You have to take a safety and survival course before the University will let you go... I never thought I'd actually have to use it."

Dash looked straight up, at the mist-covered leaves above. "Think the expedition knows about this jungle? Or did they think they were dropping us on a giant glacier?"

"It was an accident. That's all. Nothing more."

Dash frowned, but kept her eyes ahead. "All the doors were jammed. The emergency release was broken. We were out of fuel. The wingy-thingies wouldn't tilt. Both of our parachutes were missing."

"What are you saying? You don't think... no. Of course not."

"Are you blind?" Dash shouted. "As soon as Professor Walski got her hooves on the prism and all your notes, she sent us home in a coffin with wings!"

Derring-Do turned to shout at her, furiously. "Perez Walski did not try to kill us!"

They continued walking for several minutes. Eventually, Derring-Do's lower jaw started trembling. She stopped walking and waved her head, slightly dizzy.

"I don't believe it... Perez Walski tried to kill us." She shook her head. "No... it doesn't make any sense. Why would she do such a thing? It's ridiculous!"

"What about that prism? Maybe she wants to keep it to herself."

"Are you kidding? I'm the only other archeologist around who can confirm her claims with a personal testimonial. If she could get my signature on her final report, it would only strengthen her theory about where the prism originated."

"I mean what if she tries to use it? If it really is a philosopher's stone, she could make all kinds of super-medicine and sell it for a profit... heck, she could just use it to make a huge pile of gold!"

"She doesn't care about the money!" Derring snapped.

Rainbow Dash pointed straight up. "Did you see her zeppelin!? You heard her talking about her investors, and never having enough time—or money—to do things properly. What if she's trying to fund her own expeditions?"

Derring bit her bottom lip. Her eyes darted slightly.

"It doesn't even matter," Dash said. "As soon as she had the prism, she ordered her flunky to drop us like a hot potato! We need to get back to Equestria and tell ponies the truth: that it wasn't an accident."

Dash marched on, and derring paused to watch her. "Flunky...? What do you mean?"

"That creepy stallion in the long black coat. He was the one who dropped us out of the hangar. I saw him do it with my own two eyes!"

"...A black stallion in a black longcoat," Derring whispered. "I saw him in the zeppelin a few times. I know he's in charge of the security team, but I never got his name."

"Well the next time I see him, I'm giving him a hoof to the face."

Derring chased after her. "No, wait! We could have this all wrong! Maybe he acted on his own, and maybe Perez doesn't know what happened!"

"So what difference does it make?"

"Think about it! If he tried to take us out on his own, he might do the same to Perez! What if he means to steal the prism for himself?"

Rainbow Dash slowed to a halt. Derring ran around in front of her and stood face-to-face.

"If he's in control of the security forces," she said, "he could take over the whole airship. They have superior numbers, superior training... they even have weapons. He probably tried to eliminate us because he didn't want us reporting back to the university!"

"But he works for Perez," said Dash. "She wouldn't let anyone join her expedition unless she knew she could trust them. She has to be pulling the strings."

"She said it was the investors who hired the security team. I doubt they gave her any choice in the matter!"

They stared at each other for awhile.

"So," Dash said, "either Perez tried to kill us... or the black stallion tried to kill us, and he's going to kill Perez."

Derring nodded. "We have to go back and warn her!"

"But if he's got the prism, why would he wait? He's probably already killed her by now."

Derring lifted one hoof and opened her mouth to speak, but nothing came out.

Dash continued walking. "Unless you can think of a good reason for us to go back, we head for the coast."

"You don't even care if Perez and the others are in danger, do you?"

"I do care," Dash said, "but we need more to go on. If you can figure out what's going on here, I'll be the first to listen to you. Until then, our first priority is to survive."

Part 10: "How does that make you feel, huh? You're being outpaced by a cripple."

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Twelve hours later, the jungle was plunged into utter darkness. Rainbow Dash and Derring-Do took shelter under the roots of yet another giant tree and lit the damaged oil lantern to provide a tiny glow. They worked together to cover the entrances with vines and branches, and finally settled back to rest.

Dash rolled on her side and grumbled. "...Feels like my tummy is turning inside out."

"Hardtack?"

Dash turned over and looked at Derring. She was holding a big, square biscuit towards her. It looked almost exactly like a giant salt-cracker.

"You had food on you, all this time?"

"I was waiting for you to lose your cool," she said. "Thought it might give you a stronger appreciation for careful rationing... but it looks like you're holding together pretty well."

Dash swiped the biscuit and took a bite, but winced and pulled back. "Ugh... it's hard as a rock! It tastes like one, too!"

"Just break off a corner and let it soak in your mouth for awhile."

She did so, and passed the rest back. "You've had this before? Actually eaten it on purpose?"

"Sure did. Pilot's bread lasts forever and it's cheap as dirt, so it was all we could afford back in the day… I can still remember the whole team huddled around a campfire, eating beans straight out of a beat-up tin can." She leaned her head back against the dirt. "It didn't matter if we were in the middle of a desert, or at the edge of a waterfall, or what... we always had the same chunk of cardboard to chew on."

Dash stuck the the piece of biscuit in her mouth and started chewing. "I guess it's not so bad."

"It's awful," Derring said fondly. "I used to spend every night staring at the stars, dreaming of a cup of coffee and a warm, cinnamon bagel... toasted, with butter melted all over it..."

Derring closed her eyes and took a slow, deep breath.

Rainbow Dash laid down on her belly, carefully arranging her injured wings. "You want me to wake you up early?"

Derring snickered.

"What? You think I can't wake up early when I have to?"

"I'm sure you can," she said, "but we won't need a wakeup call. Not here."

"What's that mean?" Dash looked up at her, but she'd already pulled her helmet down over her face. Dash curled up on the ground and closed her eyes.

Rainbow Dash wriggled back and forth uncomfortably, shaking her head and flicking her tail. There was an itchy, fluttering sensation all over her that made it impossible to sit still. She tried to cover her head with her wing, but yelped in pain as she stretched the injured limb. She opened her eyes and let out a horrified scream: the inside of their makeshift shelter was filled with a swarm of buzzing, biting insects. She shot to her feet and thrashed about, but the swarm was much too dense to disperse. She scrambled to lift her goggles into place.

"Get away! Go on, shoo! Aaaaaugh!"

As soon as she opened her mouth to yell, the swarm filled her mouth and nostrils. She sputtered and spat them out, and finally charged out of the shelter screaming at the top of her lungs. She stared in horror as she saw the swarm outside, whirling over the jungle floor like a black dust storm. They filled the air as far as the eye could see: mosquitoes, gnats and blackflies. The roaring of a billion tiny wings was almost as loud as the tilt-rotor's engine had been. Dash spent the next three minutes stampeding in little circles and figure eights, screaming at the top of her lungs and slapping herself furiously.

The swarm dispersed, suddenly and without warning, as if somepony had flipped off a light switch. Rainbow Dash stood perfectly still, eyes darting about. She finally collapsed on the ground exhausted and gasped for breath, not daring to scratch at the countless tiny red bumps all over her body.

She wasn't sure how long she lay there, but an approaching voice caught her ear... she could have sworn it sounded like Derring-Do, except she was singing a jaunty tune:

“It was blackfly, blackfly, everywhere,

A-crawlin' in your whiskers, a-crawlin' in your hair

Swimmin' in the soup, swimmin' in the tea,

The devil take the black fly, leave me be!

Oh the blackflies, the little blackflies,

Always the blackfly no matter-where-ya-go;

I'll die with the blackfly a-pickin' my bones,

In North Onmare-aye-oh-aye-oh, in North Onmare-aye-ohhh...”

Derring-Do walked over the top of the nearest little hill, nodding her head side to side as she sang. She was covered in dried mud from head to hoof—though her jacket and helmet were both clean—and every step she took shook a small cloud of dust off her coat. She stopped when she caught sight of Rainbow Dash lying on her back in a daze. She lifted her goggles up: the only part of her left unstung were a pair of circles over her eyes.

"You're up awfully early," Derring said. "Are your wings feeling any better?"

"That," Rainbow Dash moaned, "was the grossest thing that's happened to me in my entire life."

"I found a good clean mud-hole not far from here. Might want to take a dip before the itching sets in." She held up a loose paper bag filled with crickets hopping and bouncing around. "Unless you'd rather have breakfast first, of course."

She stared at the bag for a moment. "...I take it back."

Derring-Do shrugged. "If you don't have the stomach for it, you can always have some more of the hardtack."

She leaned her head back against the loamy, mossy ground and let out a frustrated groan.

For six hours they continued to march west. They were both covered with a light dusting of dried mud, and Rainbow Dash's enormous collection of bug bites were neither angry nor red. Even so, it took a constant force of will to avoid scratching at them.

"It's like... a mosquito will just take a little sip, right? But those big black flies? Ugh! They take a bite out of ya! I swear, I lost five pounds this morning! You think I have the plague or something now?"

"Probably not from the blackflies," Derring-Do said. "The mudpacks act as a natural bandage that keeps the bite from festering. Nowhere near as good as an ice-pack, but it'll have to do. I just wish we had the first aid kit with us... even some cheap antihistamines would be a lifesaver."

Rainbow Dash pointed at Derring's saddlebags. "You want me to carry those for awhile?"

"I'm fine."

"You're strong," she said, "but that doesn't mean you've got endurance."

Derring tugged at her shoulder strap and shook her head. "You're the one with two broken wings. You need to recover."

"They're just sprains," she said. "We should at least take turns, right?"

"I suppose that's only fair." Derring stopped to undo her bags, and carefully set them on Dash's back. "And I must admit, they were starting to get pretty heavy."

They sat down for a moment.

Dash looked around them. "Everywhere we go, it all looks exactly the same."

"West is west," Derring said. "How are your wings?"

"No better or worse than before," she said. "What about you? have you been thinking about Perez and those ruins?"

"I've been thinking of nothing else... and I think I know what's going on."

"Really?" Dash stood up. "Let's walk and talk. Might help pass the time."

Derring stood up and walked alongside her. "I've been thinking about all those notes I took down while we were exploring the 'Still Waters' site... I don't think it's the only ancient ruin in this area."

"Professor Walski did say she was going to keep looking for more stuff. But what makes you think that?"

"The map we found in the last room included a lot of references I couldn't make sense of at the time... I don't think they were directions to other rooms. They were directions to nearby locations in the mountain range. And besides, that place was built like a laboratory... the sort of place you only visit once in a while. There must have been someplace nearby for ponies to live. A village or a city of some sort."

"A city... Walski was looking for a city, wasn't she?"

"She's spent her entire career searching for the capital city of the Dzunturan... this is her third major expedition to the Kathiawari mountains." Derring rolled her eyes. "I don't think anypony thought of searching the valleys between the mountains... there's hundreds of them, and they all look like glacial wastelands."

Dash frowned. "...She has your notes now."

"Yes. She has my notes now."

"Do you think she'll be able to figure it out herself?"

Derring bit her lower lip.

"So, do you?"

"I'm thinking," Derring said. "I used to think she was the best archeologist of our time. But now... I'm not sure how skilled she really is. For all we know, she could have figured out the truth long before we did. Not to mention, I don't know how useful my notes will be. I certainly didn't mention anything about a jungle valley beneath the mist."

"So we might still have time. If we hurry, and if we're very lucky, we might be able to put a stop to her evil scheme after all."

" 'Evil scheme'? Do you even listen to the words that come out of your mouth?"

"She tried to knock us off so she could keep a powerful ancient artifact all to herself. That sounds like a scheme to me."

"I still think it was the black stallion. Perez had nothing to do with it."

"You think, or you know?"

Derring scowled at her, and continued to walk in silence. After a moment, though, her eyes widened. "The prism..."

Dash paused to look back at her.

"The inscriptions referred to it as a key-stone. It's not the real prize at all... just the key."

"The key to what?"

"The city," Derring muttered. "There must be something in the city that uses the prism as an activator... some kind of machine."

"What kind of machine are we talking about here?"

"You remember the ruins we explored? I don't think that place was a city or a university. It was one giant apparatus, built into the mountain." Derring tugged her helmet down, and her gaze intensified. "Perhaps she intends to use the prism to activate the city itself. I can't even imagine what that might do."

Dash nodded. "Then we know where she's going. All we have to do is get there first."

"One step at a time." Derring-Do stood up and stretched each of her hind legs in turn. "We'd better get moving. It's almost noon."

Rainbow Dash stood up, but wobbled slightly. "Whoa... kinda dizzy."

Derring frowned at her. "Dizzy? What kind of dizzy?"

"I dunno. Hey, do you think you could take a turn carrying the saddlebags?"

"Already? It's only been ten minutes."

Dash stared off into space. "Really?"

"Here, give me those. I'll be fine."

After six hours of hiking, Derring-Do and Rainbow Dash were dripping with sweat and grime. The jungle air simmered with heat and moisture, and their muscles burned with effort. Even with the even, clear terrain, every step they took was leaden.

"Hey," Rainbow Dash called out from behind. "Do you... think you could take a turn... on the bags? gettin' kinda heavy..."

Derring glanced back at her, and paused to let her catch up. "I'm already carrying them."

"You are? Oh."

Derring paused to let her catch up. "Would you hurry up already? You've been lagging behind for the last half hour. I don't like it when ponies slow me down."

"Me!?" Dash frowned at her. "Slowing you down? Sister, you don't know who you're talking to! I'm the fastest pegasus there ever was!"

"You? Fast?" Derring let out a laugh. "More like the slowest. You're like... Rainbow... sleepy-time... dawdle or something. That's all you're good for is dawdling. Wish I had your life, lazy bones... sleeping all day."

Dash's eyes focused slightly. "Hey, I need a lot of naps! I've got a very strict exercise regimen all planned out, and it's better to take a whole lot of short naps in between. I'm a professional and I know what I'm doing."

"A professional? Don't make me laugh!" She turned to the side and lifted her left wing. "I've got one crippled wing, and you can barely keep up with me! How does that make you feel, huh? You're being outpaced by a cripple."

"That's... that's a terrible... thing to say! You're not a cripple at all! How could you be so cruel to yourself?"

Dash finally caught up to her, but wobbled sideways. Derring rushed over and leaned against her, keeping her upright. "Come on, Dash. If this keeps up, I'm just going to have to leave you behind. What do you think of that?"

Dash giggled, and her eyes unfocused. "Naww... you'd never do that. You know what it's like to be trapped, scared, and alone. You act all mean and stuff, but you'd never abandon me like that. You're such a good pal!"

"No! No, I'm not a good pal! I'm bitter and angry and you're slowing me down, and I swear I'll leave you behind if you don't start walking right now!"

Dash took one step forward and fell to the ground. "My head... feels like somepony's beating my head like a drum..."

"Look at me, Dash. Focus. You gotta stay awake, okay? You gotta—" Derring lifted her head and slapped her cheek, hard. "I said look at me! It's just malaria, you big baby. I've had it half a dozen times myself. You'll be fine if you can stay awake."

"Twi always said I had a short attention span... wonder what she's doing right now?"

Derring-Do wedged her good wing under Rainbow Dash’s body and hoisted her up and onto her back. She turned west and continued marching.

Dash let out a little giggle. "Wow... you really don't give up! You're... just like her, after all!"

"I'm nothing at all like her!" Derring shouted. "She's just a faker! Do you hear me? A faker! She's not even a real pony!"

"But she... she's..." Dash's eyes focused a bit. "No, those books are good. They're a good thing. They... they get young ponies... interested in archeology."

"Daring Do's stupid novels are the worst thing that ever happened to archeology, do you hear me? Those books fill pony's heads with all sorts of ridiculous fantasies and misinformation and outright lies! We need ponies who can think critically! Ponies who are smart enough to tell fact from fiction!"

"But it's good for that too! It's... they..."

"You think it's good? Well, why? Tell me why!" She gave Dash a sharp shake. "Tell me!"

"They give ponies a chance... to figure the truth out for themselves. They read a story, and wonder if it's real... and if they really want to know, they go to the library and look at books about history and... and stuff. They ask real questions about the truth. That's critical thinking, isn't it?"

"Is that what you tell yourself? Ha! Those ponies are in for a big disappointment, then... they'll become archeologists, expecting to dodge poison darts and chase after golden idols... and instead, they'll spend their whole lives writing reports and sorting through archives! You're lying to them!"

Dash let out a low moan. "Please... my head..."

"You know what I'm going to do as soon as we get back home? The very first thing I'll do? I'm gonna find out whoever published those stupid, wretched novels, and I'm going to sue them for every penny they have!"

"You wouldn't!"

"I wouldn't? Just try me! I'll take the publisher and the writer to court, both of them! I won't even have to pay for it: I'll add all the court costs to the settlement and make them pay for everything! What do you think of that, huh?"

"Please... don't..."

"There'll never be another Daring Do novel as long as you live, and I'm going to retire! I'll take the money, buy a nice little cottage, and never be an archeologist again! No more essays or reports... I'll just spend all my days golfing, and being completely useless! What do you think of that, eh?"

Rainbow Dash opened one eye and stared at her, blearily. "Don't quit... you love your job..."

Derring stared back at her.

"Please... I know you do... even if you don't..."

Derring-Do swallowed, hard. She took the hardtack and a canteen out of her saddlebags, then undid the straps and let the bags fall to the ground.

"No!" Rainbow Dash whimpered. "Your last journal... it's all you have left!"

Derring-Do walked on, ignoring her voice.

Two hours passed.

Derring-Do dragged herself along the ground one hoof at a time. Rainbow Dash was still slung across her back, now unconscious from fever. Derring was starting to feel a fever of her own, and her throat burned like sandpaper. The already gloomy sunlight was fading quickly.

Derring reached a hoof out and dragged herself a few more inches up a muddy incline, but lost her grip and slid all the way back down. Dash rolled a short distance to the side, and Derring landed on her back. She stared up at the canopy far above, her vision growing hazy.

Go on then, Celestia... come and get me, you spoiled, stuck-up aristocrat. I dare you to.

The sky grew dark above her, but there was no real sense of time passing. She closed her eyes.

...Figures.

She heard a faint rustle nearby. She opened her eyes and saw a circle of figures peering down at her. Their bodies were too thick and shaggy to make out, and they were all wearing huge golden masks... or were they masks at all? The figures floated over her, utterly silent. Their heads tilted slightly.

Derring's voice was raspy and weak. "You're not Celestia..." she whispered.

The figures descended upon her all at once, blotting out the sky and brushing against her skin softly. A wave of hot, wet steam wafted over her face and poured into her mouth and nostrils, carrying with it the scent of dark, rich, unsweetened cocoa.

Part 11: "Let go."

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Rainbow Dash's head reeled and her vision slowly pulsed between darkness and indistinguishable haze. She was submerged in a thick, soggy muck that filled her mouth and nose with the sickly-sweet tang of rotting fruit. Her body throbbed with pain, and every movement sent a burning fever through her bones. Her nose was just barely above the surface, but she was too weak to struggle upward. It was all she could do to toss and turn.

Come, Rainbow Dash...

She shook her head back and forth as something grasped her hind leg... something skeletal began gently pulling her down.

Come play in the mud, Rainbow Dash! You'll never have to leave... you'll never want to!

She thrashed against the skeletal voice with the last of her strength, ignoring the pain and sickness that lanced through her. When her nose briefly breached the surface, a rich and curious scent filled her nostrils: It was bold and bitter, hot as steam, and it poured into her lungs as she inhaled. She managed to take one good, long breath before falling into a violent coughing fit. She let out a furious yell as the steam seared her clean from the inside out. The filth and slime surged out of her throat and the raspy fever in her joints was replaced by a much stronger heat: a fire that tempered her bones and filled her muscles with vigor.

The skeletal presence cringed from the fire in her heart and retreated with a roar of frustration. Dash thrust her head upwards, burst from the surface of the swamp, and spread her wings wide. She streaked through the air, even though her vision was still far too hazy to see. It didn't matter where she went or what she'd escaped from... she was free.

Rainbow Dash lay on her back, tossing and turning as her vision gradually returned. Her other senses were hazy and muddled... she could hear muffled movement somewhere nearby, and a rhythmic wooden chime. The air was filled with the fragrance of smoke and spice.

Where... where am I?

She opened a single eye, but winced as a shaft of light flickered in her face. She let out a groan and rolled onto her side... she felt weak and weary all over, but not from fever or illness. This was the dull, leaden ache that followed extreme physical exercise. It was a kind of pain she was very familiar with.

She stood up and stretched her body completely, leaning backwards like a cat. After a few satisfying cricks and pops, she stood upright and shook her mane loose. She spread her wings wide and paused to look back at herself.

My wings feel fine. Actually, no... they feel fantastic. How long have I been unconscious?

She scrunched her eyes shut and blinked a few times before looking at her surroundings. She was in a tent with a bare dirt floor. The walls were made of large sheets of tree bark, sewn together with cord and supported by a frame of fresh, green saplings. The entrance was a proper cloth veil, thick and hoof-woven with a faint pattern of greens and browns. One corner of it was flipped back slightly to allow a slit of sunlight to enter.

She looked at the floor and saw a pair of thick sleeping mats, both made of woven vines and sprinkled with pink flower petals, now faded and withered. Placed between the mats was a tiny clay oven: a dome with three holes, sculpted with intricate shapes and figures. It was filled up with still-warm ashes with a strong, bitter scent.

Two beds, she thought. Whoever brought me here must have brought Derring-Do as well... and if they didn't, they're about to get an ear-full.

She swept the curtain aside and stepped out of the tent. There were numerous other tents arranged around a curving walkway, crowded and bustling with activity. The villagers were half-again as tall as herself, and walked with their heads low as if burdened. Their long, shaggy coats and manes were various shades of brown and tan, and their eyes were low-set and squinting.

They wore no saddles, but there was a wide variety of bridles and harnesses on display. All were crafted from vines and tree bark, and bedecked with a dazzling variety of decorations: Feathers and scales of all shapes and sizes, bangles and figurines made of sculpted clay or carved ivory, delicate wooden hoops filled with spiderwebs of knotted silk cord... the entire village, and everything within it, had been made by hoof.

The villagers paused in their daily routine to look at Rainbow Dash. They'd been quiet before, but now they were utterly still and silent. There was no hostility here, nor any congeniality... only serene acquiescence.

Rainbow Dash stared back at the villagers. The only sounds were the clinking of wooden wind-chimes and the trickling of water.

"So, ah..." She cleared her throat. "I don't suppose—"

The villagers turned away from her and went about their business.

Rainbow Dash frowned at the village in general. "Hey! Rude much?" She walked onto the main path and waved at everyone. "So you guys brought me to your village, right? Did you find anypony else with me?"

The villagers ignored her. A few were hauling wicker baskets and clay jars. Others were fixing or making things with only simple tools. Most were simply walking. The few foals hid behind their mother's legs and peered at her... not afraid, but not curious. Merely observant.

She went to a double-sized tent that was open along one side. Most of it was filled with mats loaded with misshapen gourds and bundles of dried herbs. There were a few natives inside, sorting through the goods.

"Hey, has anypony seen my friend? Mustard coat, grey mane? Her eyes would probably look huge to you guys. Like... big shiny dinner plates, almost. Yeah? No?"

Nobody responded to her. Nobody even made eye contact with her.

"Okay... time to kick things up a bit."

Rainbow Dash spread her wings and took to the air, hovering a few yards over their heads.

"Behooooold!" she called out over the village, "Watch in amazement as I slip free of the bonds of earth and soar through the skies! Cower in fear as I create mighty storms with a mere flick of my feathers!"

She did a mid-air pirouette and generated a tiny tornado that wandered through the air, crackling with electricity.

"...For I am a tiny, rainbow-colored, huge-eyed goddess of storms and skies! Fear not, for I am a kind and benevolent goddess with only one simple command..." She struck a dramatic pose. "...Pay attention to meeee!"

She hovered in place, gritting her teeth. The villagers offered no response. They weren't even looking up at her.

"Nothing? Aw, come on! Flying? Storms? It's not doing anything for ya?"

"Get on the ground and put your wings away. You're embarrassing us both."

"Derring?!" Rainbow Dash spotted Derring-Do down the road, standing beside a particularly elderly mare. She flew over and landed in front of her, grinning. "It is you! Awesome!"

Dash rushed over to hug her, but Derring-Do planted a hoof on her face and firmly held her back.

"Right... no hugging. Sorry." She stepped back. "But we're alive! And... surrounded by natives. Please tell me those two things are directly related."

Derring-Do nodded to the elderly mare beside her. "They found us in the jungle collapsed from fever, and took us in. They've got a cure for malaria that's better than anything I've even heard of back in Equestria. We've only been unconscious for two days, and yet we're made a complete recovery."

"And my wings are all healed up." Dash flexed her shoulders. "I'm pretty sure there was a hairline fracture or two... they must have some amazing healers."

"They have a great deal of experience with exotic medicine, as it happens." Derring-Do turned and gestured towards the elderly mare. "Rainbow Dash, I'd like to introduce you to someone... the eldest wise-witch of the Dzunturan."

Rainbow Dash stepped over to the elderly mare and held her hoof out with a congenial smile. "Heya! My name's..." She froze in place, wide-eyed, and let out a gasp. "Did you just say...!?"

"Yes. I've spent the last six hours trying to learn their language, and I've told her about our situation. She seems sympathetic to our plight." Derring-Do cleared her throat. "Please don't do anything to undermine that sympathy."

"Right... right." Dash spit on her hoof and slicked her mane back. "Gotta play it cool."

"Very much so," said Derring. "The Dzunturan's society is absolutely nothing like our own... they aren't even ponies, strictly speaking. They're something... older. They place absolutely no importance at all on individual wealth and power, and to them the greatest virtues are peace and humility."

Dash stared at her, alarmed. A moment later she turned to the elderly mare. "Thanks for saving us. You didn't have to, but you did, and I appreciate it. If there's anything we can do to help you in return, don't hesitate to tell us."

Derring-Do spoke in an exotic, lyrical language. The elderly mare nodded, slowly, but said nothing. She simply turned and walk down the path, slow and steady, and the two pegasi followed beside her.

"Wow," Derring-Do said. "I sat with her for three hours before she nodded to me."

"Well I meant every word of it." Dash watched the villagers as they passed through the village. "After all these millions of years, they're still alive...?"

"More like thousands of years. But that's still pretty incredible. The elder told me bits and pieces of their history, and it turns out there really is a lost city nearby: a city of golden paradise, where 'wonders and miracles were commonplace'."

"Lemme guess... a horrible curse demolished the place."

"That's a callous and insensitive thing to say, in addition to being horribly superstitious," said Derring-Do. "But, apparently, yes. The city fell victim to a terrible curse of some sort and has been lost ever since."

Dash looked at the primitive huts all around. "No wonder these ponies are so poor. They were probably lucky to get out of there alive."

"They choose to live this way," said Derring. "Apparently, when the curse was first discovered, some of the citizens chose to leave of their own free will. Over the next few decades, the city's leaders became increasingly decadent and the commoners languished in poverty and famine. Their religious leaders tried to seize power, and became more and more tyrannical as time went on. Eventually, the whole city fell to a level of primitive savagery that is 'not fitting to discuss in civilized company,' as the elder put it."

"These villagers are descended from the ponies who left early, aren't they?" said Dash. "No wonder they're so humble... they know what wealth and power can do to a pony."

"Exactly. They now live as nomads, in total harmony with the natural world. They own only what they carry on their backs, eat and drink only what they need to live healthy lives, and use nothing they cannot make themselves. Even written language is uncommon: most of their tradition is passed on orally."

"And yet they can make super-amazing medicine." Dash frowned, deep in thought. "One might even say miraculous. Did you tell them about the prism?"

"Yeah. Sort of. A little."

Dash turned to frown at her. "Is there a problem?"

"Maybe. I told the elder everything I knew—or at least I tried, in spite of the language barrier—and it turns out she already knows some of it."

The elderly mare walked of the path and went into a hut. They followed her inside and several small mats arranged in a ring. The elder sat down and began setting out mugs full of steamy dark brown liquid. They sat across from her and took the mugs.

Derring-Do sipped from hers immediately, savouring the aroma. "...Unbelievable. I might have to stop drinking tea entirely."

Dash peered into her mug. "Just before I woke up, I had a dream about something that smelled just like this. All steamy."

"They left some of this brewing while we were unconscious. The steam has medicinal properties... this is a much milder concoction, but still therapeutic."

"Kay... but what is it?"

"It's a drink, brewed from a rare and exotic bean that grows in this jungle." Derring-Do nodded, sagely. "They call it... coffee."

Dash glared at her. "So? We have coffee in Equestria."

Derring took another sip. "Not this coffee," she said with a blissful smile.

Dash took a cautious sip from her own mug. She pursed her lips and arched one eyebrow in grudging admiration.

"So. What do these Dzunturan know?"

Derring-Do took a moment to choose her words.

"They know that the temple palace, the very heart of the lost city, is one giant machine—an alchemical engine, if you will, that supplied their civilization with all sorts of enchanted wonders. The prism is the key that supplies it with the concentrated magical power it needs. It was used for all sorts of magical gadgets and elixirs... but as soon as the medicine was discovered, they used the machine for nothing else. That's because the elixir it creates doesn't just heal you... it also makes you immortal."

Rainbow Dash stared at her. "You... really believe that?"

"They certainly do," Derring said and nodded to the elder. "Their whole society was torn apart by conflict as the royal leaders fought against the temple for control of the prism. Everypony wanted immortality, and the alchemical engine produced only a few drops of elixir every month. In the end, their civilization tore itself apart until nothing was left... except for these few nomads. Now, after thousands of years, there are rumors that some strange new cult has taken up residence in the city and is trying to reactivate the engine."

"You gotta...! We gotta...!" She glanced between Derring and the elder a few times, then bolted to her feet. "We gotta take care of this, Derring. I don't care how dangerous it is: we can't just let these creepy cultists take over everything! If they win here, it's a sure bet they'll try and take over the world next!"

Derring rolled her eyes and gave an exasperated sigh, but there was a smirk on her face. "Didn't even stop to think about it, did you?"

"Sure I did," she said. "It just didn't take very long. Now tell the elder we'll take care of it, and tell her not to go anywhere near that city until after we're done. I don't want her people getting hurt."

"That won't be a problem," Derring said, "seeing as they can't go back."

Dash tilted her head, and her left ear flipped up. "...Can't?"

"The curse never ended, strictly speaking. When these nomads left the city, they swore they would never return ever again, nor would any of their descendants. If a member of the Dzunturan tribe were ever to set hoof in the city, the curse would take its toll on them and cause a terrible catastrophe."

"They need our help, don't they?" said Rainbow Dash. "We're the only ponies they've found who can go into the city without triggering the curse. We're all they have."

Derring nodded.

"Are you up to this?"

Derring shrugged. "Well, it's not like I'm doing anything else with my week."

Dash smiled at her. After a while, Derring-Do grudgingly responded with a half-smile of her own.

The elderly mare turned—ever so slightly—to look at the entrance of the hut. Dash and Derring turned to look as well and saw a stallion standing in the entrance. His approach had been utterly silent despite the crunchy leaves and soil outside. He was staring at them blandly, holding a black-and-red notebook in his mouth.

Derring-Do shot to her feet. "My journal! They must have found my saddlebags in the jungle! Did you..." She scrunched her eyes shut and tapped her forehead. "Find... find... olqu? Tanaid olqu khogiin uut bainuu?"

The stallion continued to stared at her for a moment, then nodded.

"Right! Yes! Wonderful! Khogiin uut khaan bain ve?"

The stallion turned away and walked towards the path. Derring chased after him. "I gotta go get my stuff. I'll be right back!"

"No prob," said Dash. "I'll just stay here and catch some hangtime."

Derring rushed after the stallion and followed him down the path.

Dash looked at the interior of the hut. Apart from a few ornate bits of pottery, it looked the same as the hut she'd woken up in. The same as every other hut, in fact.

"So," she said, "whaddya do for fun around here? Know any cool ancient sports?"

The elder watched her, squinting through her shaggy mane.

"Yeah," Dash said. "I don't think I actually introduced myself before... I wasn't trying to be rude, but we kinda got sidetracked by the whole curse thing. Do you know who I am? Did my pal tell you my name already?"

She watched her for awhile.

"My name's Rainbow Dash," she said. "Happy to meet you! What's your name?"

"Sorañxa Batgana," the elder said.

"Wow, that's... a tongue twister." Dash tilted her head. "Got any nicknames or something?"

"Sorañxa Batgana," the elder said, this time pointing at her.

"Me? You mean... that's my name? In your language?"

The elder nodded.

Dash's eyes widened. "I've got a Dzunturan name now? Wow... kinda makes me feel all spiritual and stuff. I feel like we got a sort of a spirit-bond thing goin' on here, you and me." Dash leaned forward. "Hey, are there any other words you can teach me? I'm not exactly a brainiac, but I'd love to give it a shot anyways."

"She is cursed."

Dash tensed. "Whoa! You can understand us!?”

“Your friend," the elder said. "She will die soon."

"Buh... wha..." she shook her head. "B-b-but that curse only happens if a Dzunturan enters the city, right? Derring-Do isn't secretly a descendant of the Dzunturan, is she? That'd be..." she paused to stroke her chin. "Actually, that'd be pretty cool. She does have a brownish coat, and she is pretty stocky for a pegasus."

"No. Different curse."

Dash stared off into space for a moment.

"The prism," she whispered. "She swiped the prism. You mean that curse is real!?"

The elder nodded.

"What do I do? There's gotta be something I can do about it!"

"Only one," she said. "Let go."

"Let go? Let go!?" Dash shot to her feet and snapped her wings out in an instinctive threat display. "What kind of crummy advice is that!? I oughta—!"

"Dash? What're you doing?"

She turned to Derring-Do, standing in the entrance with her saddlebags secured to her back. Dash pointed at the elder but the accusation caught in her throat. The elder didn't look angry or vindictive or petty... she looked serene and observant.

Dangit. It's impossible to stay mad at her for more than a second. Dash swept her mane back and marched out of the hut. "Nevermind. It's nothing. Let's get out of here already."

"If you say so."

Part 12: "They need us to be here. It's just the cards we've been dealt."

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Derring-Do and Rainbow dash walked along the village’s main path, side by side. Derring pointed at the end of the path up ahead. "The elder has agreed to lend us a guide who can lead through the jungle valley. He'll have no trouble keeping us fed and safe, and he knows the quickest route to the city. But as soon as we get close, he's going to leave us. There'll be no turning back after that, and there's no telling what we'll find when we arrive."

"Yeah... yeah. Hey, what do you think of that elder mare? Do you think we can trust her?"

"From what I've seen?" Derring adjusted her helmet. "I think so. These ponies trust her with more than just their lives. They attribute her with a spiritual awareness that borders on the supernatural... she's knowledgeable about fate and destiny and such."

"So if she gave you some advice...?"

"Well I don't know if I'd take it, but I'd be extremely foolish to ignore it completely."

Dash bit her lower lip. "...Even if it was bad advice?"

Derring smiled at her. "You should know that a 'wise-witch' always speaks in riddles. Their advice is always incredibly convoluted and every word has three different meanings, some of them quite subtle. Even if the advice seems bad, it might turn out well in the end."

"Yeah... subtle."

Dash's gaze wandered off to the side and she caught sight of a group of colts and fillies—they were the first group of children she'd seen since she arrived, and they were all laughing and chasing a ball.

"At least they know how to have fun," she said. "I was starting to worry."

"Oh, they have all sorts of games and festivals... we're just strangers who showed up in the middle of troubling events. That's all."

Dash watched as one of the colts kicked the ball straight up, and another did a nimble backflip and kicked it even higher. Dash's eyes widened as the children each took turns kicking the ball straight into the air, always with an acrobatic flourish.

"Geez... those kids have some nice kicks on 'em. Real nice kicks. What game is that?"

"They call it the 'game of life'," said Derring-Do. "The ball represents the world, and each kick represents the mark we leave upon it. The game ends when the ball touches the ground."

"How do you win?"

Derring shrugged. "It is not what they would call a 'winning game.' The ball will hit the ground eventually, no matter how hard they try. The objective is to make each kick as impressive as possible."

"That's pretty grim, don't you think?"

"Not at all," she said. "After all, nobody wins at life. We do what we can with the time we have left."

"Yeah," Dash muttered to herself, "real subtle."

"Ah, here we are." Derring walked to the end of the path and nodded to a particularly heavy-set stallion, bedecked in a particularly diverse array of charms and bangles. "Sain baina uu," she said.

The stallion nodded. "Bilän?" he said.

Derring turned to Dash. "Ready?" she said.

Rainbow Dash looked back at her and saw a strange new gleam in her eyes. It certainly hadn't been there a week ago. Let go, Dash thought to herself.

Derring-Do waved a hoof in her face. "Hey. You still there?"

"We're not ready for this."

"What? Why not? What else do we need?"

"This is too dangerous," she said, "and I think we're biting off way more than we can chew."

Derring stared back at her, still smiling, but with a touch of confusion.

"Look, you've gone through an awful lot of trouble because of me. You got chewed out by your boss, you almost exploded in a plane crash, and you almost died of malaria."

"It's fine, really," she said, "I've had malaria a couple of times before. It's not so bad after the first time. I mean, the first time really sucks, but after that—"

"And now we're going into a horrible cursed city to stop a creepy cult from activating a machine that could give them ultimate cosmic power. We don't even know anything about them!"

"The elder referred to them as the 'mad ones'."

"We don't know how many of them there are, or what kind of weird magic they might have. We don't know what sort ancient, cosmic doodads they might have found in the city... cosmic doodads they might use against us."

"But we have to do something, right? Right now, we're all they have. We're literally their only hope."

"Yeah. And maybe we could do it... but it might cost us more than we think." Rainbow Dash looked up at the mist-soaked canopy far above. "I think we need to let this one go."

Derring-Do's tail drooped. "You do?"

"We can still solve this problem," said Dash. She spread her wings wide and hovered a few feet off the ground. "Now that my wings are healed I can fly back to Canterlot and get help. I can gather all my friends, and the six of us can take care of this no problem."

"Your friends?" Derring-Do said. "What is this, a slumber party? Shouldn't you call the the royal guard, or the princess or something?"

"The first thing she'd do is tell me and my friends to go take care of it. Seriously... if the six of us get together, there's nothing we can't do."

Derring-Do stared at her. "Who are you, Rainbow Dash? Really?"

"I'll tell you about it when we get back. For now, you just stay here with the Dzunturan while I go back to Canterlot. It should take me three hours. Four, tops."

"Oh, and what am I supposed to do? Just sit here and be useless?"

"You can spend more time with the tribe," she said. "Think about it: it's a chance to study a lost tribe and learn more about their culture and language and stuff. I bet most archeologists only dream of that sort of opportunity!"

Derring-Do looked back at the village.

"I know you want to help," Dash said, "and you did. You figured out what's going on all by yourself. But now it's my turn. Please, Derring."

"No, you're right. You're completely right." Derring adjusted her helmet. "To be perfectly forthright, I've already had more than enough adventure to last me a lifetime. And if you genuinely believe that you and your friends can take care of this yourselves... well, the pragmatic thing is to leave it to the professionals."

"Thanks. I'm glad you understand." Rainbow Dash flew up higher. "Don't worry: I'll be back in three hours. Four, tops."

Derring waved up at her. "Wait! You can't go now!"

"I'll be fine," she said. "I can glide for hours, and find my way through any kind of storm. I'm a professional weather pony and a professional athlete!"

"What about a professional jungle explorer?" she called. "You'll get lost before you can leave the jungle, and you most certainly won't be able to find your way back here!"

"Oh... yeah." Rainbow Dash landed beside her. "Well, great. Now what?"

Derring-Do took out her journal, tore out a page, and passed it to Dash. "Here are the coordinates for where we are now, in latitude and longitude. When you come back, bring a commercial grade radio transmitter with you and send out a signal request on this frequency as you search over the mist. I still have my portable radio receiver right here: once I hear you, I'll fire off one of my flares."

"And how're we supposed to see it? There's no way that flare gun will reach the mist up above."

"It's a magical flare," she said. "Just figure out a way to detect magical energy signatures. I'm sure someone of your resourcefulness can find a way."

"Wow... you really are good at this." Rainbow Dash set a hoof on her shoulder. "Thank you. After my friends and I clean this up, I promise to tell everypony you were the one that made it all possible. You'll be shaking hooves with the princess by the end of the week."

Derring looked away, bashful. "That's not really necessary. But thank you."

"Not necessary? Are you kidding?" Rainbow Dash grinned at her. "Imagine the looks on the other professor's faces when they hear about it."

A smile crept over Derring-Do's face. "That... might actually be worth it."

Rainbow Dash nodded to their guide. "So, can you show me to the western edge of the jungle? Someplace where I can find my own way to the ocean?"

"Dalaj, örnö?" said Derring-Do.

The guide watched her for a moment. "Dalaj?" He said.

Derring-Do nodded. "Dalaj, örnö. Bätu."

The guide nodded to her. He took up an enormous golden mask with a great shaggy mane that covered his neck and shoulders. The sculpted face gleamed and glittered brightly, even in the murky light of the noonday sun. He ran off into the jungle at a brisk pace, and Dash and Derring followed after him.

They spent the next six hours running through the jungle. Rainbow Dash flew overhead in relative ease and comfort, and their guide showed no sign of fatigue. Derring-Do, despite her great strength, had to rest every fifteen minutes or so to catch her breath. They drank water almost constantly, using huge leaves to collect dew and moisture. When they stopped for lunch their guide effortlessly scrounged up a bounty of succulent, star-shaped fruits and dark-green leaves. There was little conversation: Derring-Do had an oddly determined mood about her, and Dash had no desire to press the issue.

The floor of the jungle gradually became more and more dense, with shrubs and smaller trees blocking their way. At last, their guide led them halfway up a steep hill and stopped to look back at them.

"Finally," said Rainbow Dash. "I don't know why we had to bring you along, though... I could have followed him at top speed without any trouble."

Derring made her way up the hill. "We'd better get moving."

"We? Oh, no you don't. You're going straight back to the village."

Derring-Do rolled her eyes and continued climbing.

Rainbow Dash flew up to the top of the hill and came to an opening in the forest wall. The valley stretched before her, without any of the giant trees to blot out the sky. A vast, sprawling city covered the ground for miles, nestled between two enormous mountain ranges: the buildings and highways were built out of gold-colored stone and packed so closely together that no patch of earth could be seen. Pyramids, towers, and temples reached for the sky. Clusters of cube-shaped houses grew out of each other like coral. The aqueducts... more than anything else, the city was dominated by a vast grid of artificial rivers, streams and fountains. Water splashed down huge stair-steps, and sluiced along the tops of walls in perfectly smooth sheets. Fountains and gargoyles spouted columns of water from every rooftop. Bridges spanned between buildings and arched over canals. Instead of train or carriage stops, there were gondola docks—hundreds of them, scattered everywhere—with ramps and stairways and lamp posts.

"But... the ocean!" Rainbow Dash stared at the sprawling metropolis, glowing like gold in the light of the approaching sunset. As her eyes moved over the buildings, she realized where the sunset was shining from. "The sunset's behind us? We're going east? We've been going east this whole time?!"

Derring-Do walked next to her and rubbed her nose. "Looks like."

"That stupid guide did this on purpose! He tricked us!" Rainbow Dash spun around, furious, but the guide was nowhere to be seen. "You...! But...! Aaargh! You get back here, you lying son-of-a-gun!"

"Calm down and quit crowing." Derring-Do took out her notebook and began sketching a crude map. "We don't have long until sunset, so we'll have to search the city quickly. We're looking for the main temple-palace... we should start with the larger buildings."

Rainbow Dash pointed a hoof at her. "You knew he was taking us in the wrong direction! You knew all along, didn't you?"

Derring rolled her eyes. "If I had said something, it wouldn't have helped. You would have spent an entire hour whining and complaining, the guide would have spent another hour leading us around in circles, and we would have ended up right here two hours late."

"They manipulated us into doing their dirty work, and you're just going to go along with it?!"

"The Dzunturan don't have a choice. They need us to be here. It's just the cards we've been dealt."

Rainbow Dash hovered over her. "Well they coulda asked!"

Derring-Do fixed her with a stern glare. "They just did."

Dash stared at the iron in her eyes. She drifted back down to the ground. She took a deep breath and lowered her voice. "You know I don't understand their language. Did you tell the guide to take us to the city instead of the ocean? Or did the guide lead us here on his own?"

"Whatever works for you, I guess." Derring-Do tightened the strap on her pith helmet and strolled over the top of the hill. "Don't fly more than a yard off the ground until it gets dark... with your mane and tail, you'll stick out like a parade float parked on top of a lighthouse."

Rainbow Dash watched her walk down the hill and towards the city. She was moving at a casual jog, and there was nothing cautious or worried about her posture. Her shadow stretched out in front of her, long and thin, reaching towards the ruined city ahead.

Like she'd walked out of a book.

Part 13: We're dealing with honest-to-gosh, dyed-in-the-wool psychopaths here.

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The west-facing walls of the lost city glittered like rose-gold in the light of the setting sun. The other surfaces were a midnight-blue labyrinth of steep shadows. It was like a scene from a pop-up book: as long as one viewed it from the west, it seemed real and solid... but seen from any other angle, it was a paper-thin facade painted over a shadowy emptiness.

Rainbow Dash's eyes darted about as she followed Derring-Do through the ancient causeway. The city was built like a sponge, with windows and archways built into every surface. It was impossible to tell if any of the buildings or corridors were occupied.

Derring-Do paused to look in her journal, stroking her chin.

"We're lost, aren't we?" said Rainbow Dash.

"Not even that," Derring said. " 'Lost' implies we know where we want to end up."

"We're looking for a machine, right?"

Derring frowned at her journal. "The 'engine' was the center of their entire civilization, but I'm not sure which building it's in. The translation is tricky... it's either a temple, a palace, or a laboratory." She looked up and pointed at several of the larger buildings in the distance. "I can see at least seven buildings that might qualify."

"We don't have time to search the whole city," said Dash. "At this rate, we'll barely have enough time to find a place to camp."

Derring shut her journal and tossed it in her saddlebag. "We may as well call it a night, then. Do you think we could reach one of those tall towers? I'd like to have a good, all-around view while we camp out."

Dash nodded. They made their way through the twisting roads and stairways and finally came to the foot of a tall hexagonal tower. They went to the attached building and climbed through a collapsed section of wall, and Dash stared at the wide interior. Shafts of light shone in through a row of windows, and dust glittered in the air

"Looks like the wall was blown apart," she said. "Do you think this place was a barracks or something?"

"Either a nursery school or an orphanage," Derring said as she climbed over the wreckage. "Looks like it was turned into a military blockade during the early stages of the war, before the 'war' turned into one big riot. Looks like it was refurbished three or four times, probably whenever a new faction took control of it."

Dash watched Derring-Do as she climbed up the stairs inside the tower. She flew over and hovered alongside her. The dust in the air whorled around her. "I guess this must be pretty exciting for you. As an archeologist, I mean."

"It's maddeningly frustrating," she said. "There's no detritus here: No tools or engravings or clothes or artistic sculptures... nothing to give us a clue about how they lived or what they were like." Derring scraped her hoof gently against the stone floor. "You learn to keep an eye out for the little things—the everyday things—but no matter how hard I look, there's nothing here. It's jarring." Derring climbed up the last of the stairs and went into the tower's turret: a small, hexagonal room with a huge windows on all sides. "The wars and riots did this: Ponies salvaged everything that wasn't nailed down. They refurbished homes and shops into fortifications. They destroyed everything that wasn't immediately useful... everything that makes a city a home."

Rainbow Dash walked to one of windows and stared at the city below. There were only a few slivers of light now, all of them shrinking rapidly. "That curse wasn't fooling around, was it?"

Derring rolled her eyes. "Again with the hokum?"

"But what if it's really true? The elder said—"

"Blaming this sort of catastrophe on a mystical curse cheapens us all," Derring said. "There were reasons, Dash: famine, social unrest, extreme distribution of wealth and power, religious persecution... there are always reasons. These ponies were obliterated because they failed to learn an important lesson, and blaming it all on mystical mumbo-jumbo cheapens that lesson."

Rainbow Dash sat with her back against a wall. "I spoke with the princess once, and asked her about destiny and prophecy and stuff. You wanna know what she said?"

"Not in the least."

"She said that prophecies—the true ones, anyways—are like a weigh scale. They don't say 'this will happen no matter what'. It's a warning: touch the stove, and you're gonna get burned." Dash leaned her head back against the wall. "Sounds like what you said just now... that there's always a lesson to learn."

"What's the lesson here, then? It's a city that tore itself apart from the inside out. What kind of message is that?"

"You're the archeologist. You tell me."

Derring-Do stared out the window, at the city below. She shook her head. "We'll never know. Ponies lived here for hundreds of years... they were born, they lived, they fell in love, had families, retired, and they died here... and now there's nothing left to study. Nothing for us to learn."

They sat in silence for awhile, watching as the last traces of light-blue sky faded away.

Rainbow Dash turned to look at the city below, frowning intently. "...Maybe one thing."

Derring-Do sat up and looked out the window, following her gaze. Now that the city was pitch dark, she could see faint white sparkles: there were over a dozen trails of light weaving their way through the streets.

"Care to take a closer look?"

Dash shook her head. "I could, but it's a clear night sky with a full moon. They might see my silhouette against the stars. Risky."

"Guess we have a good enough view as it is." Derring took out her journal and glanced at her crude little map. "It looks like they're all heading towards the same place: that big ziggurat covered in fountains. You think that's where the engine is?"

"There's gotta be something there," Dash said, "and that's good enough for me."

Derring-Do and Rainbow Dash rushed down the spiral staircase and ran through the city streets, following Derring's hastily sketched map. Derring's heavy rubber boots were muted against the stone, and Dash glided mere inches over the road. After a few twists and turns, they came to a half-crumbled wall. Dash flew up and peeked over the edge, then waved for Derring to follow. She climbed up the jumbled stone bricks like a ladder and came up beside her. They both peeked over the top and saw a long line of ponies, dressed in dark, heavy robes and glittering silver accessories: they had heavy silver chains looped around their necks, and wore silver masks that resembled smooth, serene faces with closed eyes. The ponies moved along quickly, with only the faint sound of rustling cloth and clinking metal.

The ponies filed past them and vanished around a nearby corner. Dash hopped up onto the road and helped Derring climb up.

"Who are these guys?" whispered Dash.

"No idea," said Derring. "The elder mentioned that a strange new cult had occupied the city—she called them the 'mad ones'—but I'd just assumed they were another group of natives."

"These guys obviously aren't from around here," said Dash.

"Quite. But they're not a part of any cult I'm familiar with. Maybe if I could get a closer look at their regalia, or watch one of their ceremonies..."

Dash frowned in thought. "I dunno why, but something about them seems familiar..."

"Familiar? How?"

She shook her head. "Let's just keep moving. Maybe we'll figure something out as we go."

"Right."

They peered around the corner, then followed after their quarry. The robed ponies were difficult to see, but the sounds of their robes and chains haunted them from every direction. Several times they ducked into corridors or behind walls, only to realize they'd hidden from a harmless echo. They finally reached the foot of the ziggurat itself and saw countless lines of robed ponies seeping into it's many entrances, like caterpillars burrowing into a rotten log.

Dash's eyes flicked over the ziggurat. "Think they can lock the front door after they're all inside?"

"Let's not wait to find out."

Derring bolted around the corner and sprinted across a long stretch of causeway with absolutely no cover. Dash clenched her teeth, but flew after her. By the time they were halfway across, a heavy stone door began sliding down over the entrance.

"No-no-no!" Derring hissed. She clenched her teeth and burst into a full-on sprint.

Rainbow Dash streaked ahead of her easily and slipped into the corridor. She saw a heavy stone switch to her left and pulled it with all her strength, but the mechanism refused to budge.

"Come on... come on!" She looked outside, watching as Derring-Do closed the distance. She waved for her to hurry up.

Derring closed the distance, dove under the door and slid across the floor. Dash grabbed her leg and pulled her all the way through.

Dash smiled at her "Cutting it a little close, aren't you?"

Derring touched her head and let out a gasp. "My hat!" She spun around and saw her pith helmet sitting under the heavy stone door with inches to spare. She scrambled towards it, but Dash hauled her back.

"It's just a hat, dummy! Forget about it!"

"No!"

Derring struggled to break free of Dash's grip, but it was too late. They both watched as the massive stone door slid down against her helmet, and stopped just as it touched the top. There was a dull chime, like a series of stone mugs being tapped in sequence, and the door began sliding back up into the ceiling. They stared at it together, slack jawed.

Derring strolled over to her hat with a sigh. "I guess we know one thing about the ancient Dzunturans... they had half-decent health and safety regulations."

Rainbow Dash watched the door as it slid shut again, this time plunging the corridor into total darkness. There was a quick snap, and an eerie green glow lit up the corridor: Derring passed the glow stick-necklace to Dash and cracked another for herself. "Let's hurry. I want to figure out what these freaks are up to, even if it's the very last thing I do."

Rainbow Dash bit her lower lip, but kept quiet.

Their journey through the depths of the stone pyramid was slow and uneventful. There were no other ponies wandering the corridors and only a few twists and turns to navigate. This particular building, unlike the entire rest of the city, wasn't laid out like a maze at all. It was designed to be used.

Sounds echoed back to them... voices, chanting. Bonfires burning. Stone grinding against stone. They caught sight of a faint blue light up ahead, and discarded their glowsticks before going any further. The corridor led them to an ornate balcony set along the inside wall of a massive stone cathedral: there were three tiers of balconies all along the inside walls, all facing a long hall. There were robed ponies gathered about everywhere: crowded on the main floor and standing along the balconies. They were all standing perfectly still in neat rows and columns, watching something on the far end of the hall.

Dash and Derring crept into the balcony, standing less than a yard behind a row of robed ponies. They were too captivated by the reverberating chanting—a low, growling voice with an unnatural inflection, like regular speech played backwards—to notice anything behind them. They crept further along the balcony and finally saw the far end of the cathedral: there was a raised stage that supported a massive apparatus with circles and disks orbiting around a central point. It was like an astronomer's globe or a child's toy mobile. At the moment, it was stationary.

There was a stallion on the stage, standing in front of the apparatus and leading the chant. His robe was much more elaborate than the others, covered in silver patterns and low-hanging ribbons. He wore a crown of curved silver spikes instead of a mask and his face was covered with streaks of black and white makeup that curled around his eyes like the contours of a skull. he had a huge, ornate staff with him, tipped with a silver skull with bladed antlers. He marched back and forth in front of the machine, ranting at the crowd.

Derring-Do and Rainbow Dash crept along the balcony, behind the row of robed cultists. They reached a stairway at the far end and quietly climbed down to the next level: they emerged into a hidden room directly left of the stage. The cult leader's voice washed over them like a palpable force.

Dash stared at the leader's ominous staff, teeth clenched. "I know this reminds me of something. D'you think..." She turned and saw Derring was gone.

She glanced around and saw Derring searching or something near the back of the chamber: there were heavy bookshelves arranged by the wall, and several enormous clay urns arranged around an iron cauldron.

"Looks like they brought all this with 'em," whispered Dash.

Derring opened up a heavy trunk and rummaged through the contents. "Quickly. Help me look."

"What for?"

"Something. Anything." She closed the trunk and rushed to a nearby writing desk, ransacking each of the tiny little drawers. "Books, scrolls, journals... stuff like that."

Rainbow Dash flew up and searched the shelves. "I don't see any books on these bookshelves... it's all weird-looking tools and funny-shaped crystals."

"There's gotta be some kind of... aha!" Derring pulled aside a small banner on the wall and reached into a hidden space. "Almost... almost..."

Dash landed beside her. "Anything interesting?"

"There's a big book in there, but it's all the way in the back."

"Here, let me try. You keep an eye out for trouble."

Derring stepped back and let Dash reach into the hole. She turned to watch the stage, but froze as she heard a faint hiss nearby. She turned to her left and caught sight of a slender, slithering shape along the wall. She tensed up completely, eyes wide.

"Wow, that's really in there." Dash limbed up a bit and pushed her head into the hole. "Maybe I can—"

Derring stared at the slithering shape, paralyzed. "D-d-dash?"

"I know, I know. Don't rush me."Dash crawled a little further into the hole, kicking her hind legs in the air. "Can you give me a push?"

The serpent slithered along the wall, right over Derring's shoulder. She pressed herself back against the wall and tapped her hoof against Dash's hindquarters. Beads of sweat formed on her brow.

"Dash... could you... maybe...."

"Dang it, this isn't working." Dash pulled herself out of the hole and shook the dust and cobwebs out of her mane. When she saw the look on Derring's face, she followed her gaze and finally noticed the black, scaly serpent slithering out of the wall.

Rainbow Dash shrieked at the top of her lungs. "Aaaa snake! Snake-snake-snake-snake! Sah-naaaayke!!" She jumped up and down and ran back and forth, desperate to trample the viper under her hooves. She knocked over two of the large urns, spilling oily blue liquid across the floor. She snatched a bull-whip off the shelf and began whacking it against the floor completely at random.

She eventually dropped the whip and gasped for breath. She turned to Derring Do, and only then noticed a semi-circle of robed cultists surrounding them, wielding serrated, silver-tipped spears.

Dash stared at them for a moment. "Yeah. There was a... snake."

Dash and and the cultists stared at each other silently.

"...It's gone now," she said.

"Yes thank you," Derring-Do said through clenched teeth.

Moments later, Derring-Do and Rainbow Dash were on the stage, tied to a pair of large wooden stakes. The vast audience of robed ponies stared at them: a horde of blank, emotionless silver masks. Their leader was standing nearby, watching impassively as an underling emptied the contents o Derring-Do's saddlebags onto the floor.

Derring-Do sighed and rolled her eyes. "It's unreal how much I hate you right now. It's like... a physical sensation, almost."

"Would you give me a break?" Rainbow Dash said. "Everypony's afraid of snakes. Because they're scary."

"You were a thousand times bigger than it! What exactly is it going to do to you?"

"It coulda been poisonous!"

"They eat mice. Mice and eggs. Neither of which we are."

Dash let out an exasperated sigh. "Anything else you'd like to complain about?"

"You scream like a girl," Derring said matter-of-factly. "I find this profoundly disturbing."

The cultist clacked the base of his staff against the floor. "Talbaj."

Derring glared at him. "Do you mind? We're in the middle of something."

The cultist marched in front of her stake and examined her face. "You are the cursed one. Where is the stone?"

Derring-Do quirked an eyebrow. "I'm the what?"

"You now suffer the curse of death. This means you have taken the sacred stone from it's most holy resting place. Where is it?"

"I don't believe in curses. They're all fake and made up, like astrology and cults."

"I can smell it on you. Your soul stinks of death."

Dash cleared her throat. "He, ah, might know what he's talking about. The elder mare told me... you were kinda... cursed to die."

Derring glared at her. "And you were going to tell me about this when, exactly?"

"You were kind of having a bad day. I figured it could wait until after you'd had a bath and a cup of coffee."

The cult leader frowned at her. "You will give me the stone."

"Sure," she said. "Right after you bite my monochromatic tail."

"Do not insult me again, mare."

Derring-Do cleared her throat, theatrically. "Your mother dresses you like an idiot. You look ridiculous in that getup. Are you expecting to go trick-or-treating later tonight? Is that it?"

"If you do not co-operate with us—"

"Or what, exactly?" Derring said, "I'm already cursed to die, and that's kind of a hard act to follow. What are you going to do, kill me twice?"

"Trick-or-treating," Rainbow Dash muttered. "Fill up her belly with a treat or two... so she won't return to come eat you."

Derring peered at her, quizzically.

"Nightmare Moon," Dash said. "That's where I've seen these guys before. See the silver pattern embroidered on the backs of their hoods? It's the exact same shape of Nightmare Moon's helmet and neck armor."

The cultist clacked the end of his staff against the floor again. "You are not even worthy enough to speak her name aloud."

"How do you even know that?" said Derring.

"I saw her face to face," Dash said, "right before me and my friends kicked her butt so hard she turned back into Princess Luna."

"Silence!" The cult leader roared. It was the first emotion he'd expressed.

"The cabal," Derring-Do whispered. "Cor blimey... we're dealing with the Lunatic Cabal."

"The what?"

"The Lunatic Cabal," Derring said, "is a thousand-year-old illuminati made up of Nightmare Moon's most loyal servants, soon after she was imprisoned in the moon. They laid low for centuries, allegedly manipulating world events from behind the scenes to achieve their one and only ultimate goal... to release Nightmare Moon from her astral prison, and bring eternal night to the world once again."

"No way! Seriously?"

"Of course, no pony ever really thought they existed. It was all a ridiculous conspiracy theory. Until now, anyways. Hard to tell if these creeps are the genuine article, or just copy-cats. Either way, they're actual lunatics."

Dash snickered.

"What? What's so funny?"

"You said 'cor blimey' before. You're like, British and stuff!"

"Try to stay focused. We're dealing with honest-to-gosh, dyed-in-the-wool psychopaths here. The elder was spot-on when she called them 'the mad ones'."

"Right, right." Dash turned to the audience. "So, did you know that me and my friends kicked Nightmare Moon's butt so hard she turned back into Princess Luna? She's doin' pretty good these days, so I guess you can all go home now. No need to thank me... it's just what I do."

The cult leader turned to her, emotionless as before. "We will not tolerate the rule of this idiot-child usurper. She is a pretender to the throne. We will not rest until she is returned to her proper glory."

Derring-Do rolled her eyes. "And how do you plan to do that?"

He pointed his staff at the enormous apparatus behind them.

She craned her head back to examine the machine. "And what do you need us for?"

The leader tilted his head. "Make it work," he said, casually.

"It won't work without the prism," she said, "and we don't have it. We don't even know where it is, in fact."

"We have the prism," he said. "You will make it work."

Derring clenched her jaw. "You're lying."

"Now I have your attention. Good." The leader nodded to one of his minions near the side o the stage, and the robed pony pulled a long loop of chain hanging from the ceiling. the sound of stone grinding against stone echoed up through the floor, and the apparatus slid back against the wall: as it moved, they saw a circular hole in the floor where it had been sitting.

The leader walked to the edge of the hole and nodded down. "The machine does not work. Many have gone in. None have come out. But you are different... I think you will make it work."

"You think we're going to help you destroy the world?" Rainbow Dash said. "You're crazy!"

The leader offered her a tiny shrug. "You are only figuring this out now?"

He set the tip of his spear against the top of the log Derring was tied to, and gently pushed against it. Derring's eyes widened, and she let out a panicked yelp as the log tumbled towards the pit.

"No, don't!" Dash shouted.

The top of the log slammed against the far side of the pit, and the whole thing rolled sideways until Derring was facing straight down. The leader walked along the top of the log, balanced perfectly. One of his minions passed him a torch and he dropped it into the pit: it fell into the darkness and cast a ring of light against the inside of the well, and finally vanished from sight.

Derring swallowed. "Okay... you have my attention."

"Good," the leader said. He turned his spear upside down. "Explore the engine. Make it work. Then you may leave this place alive."

"Really, now?" said Derring. A single droplet of sweat trickled down her nose and fell into the pit below. "And what if we choose not to?"

The cult leader whirled his staff with a flourish and cut through the ropes. Derring-Do plummeted into the depths with terrified scream. Rainbow Dash burst free of her ropes and streaked into the pit, diving like a falcon.

The apparatus began sliding back into place over the hole, and the cultist's voice echoed after them. "...Choose quickly."

Part 14: "Youmgui Taivan."

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Rainbow Dash streaked down through the narrow, pitch black well, following the sound of Derring-Do's terrified screams. She could fly much faster than most ponies could fall, but here she had absolutely no room to maneuver. Her eyes still hadn't adjusted to the darkness, either: her glow stick necklace cast a faint green light on the walls, but only reached a couple yards ahead of her.

At first, Derring-Do's screams were distant and warped... but soon the distortion vanished entirely, and Dash slammed into her from above. Derring scrambled like mad to grab hold of her, sending Dash off balance and scraping her wingtips against the stone walls. As soon as they locked their hooves together Dash snapped her wings out. She pushed against the wind, desperate to break their fall, but Derring-Do pulled her down like an anchor. Twice Dash spread her wings too far and bounced off the wall, spinning wildly out of control.

The claustrophobic well vanished around them as they fell down through the ceiling of a huge, circular hall. Rainbow Dash spread her wings wide and caught the air for three precious seconds, clinging to Derring's legs as hard as she could. They landed on the top of a rectangular stone slab and tumbled down a small pyramid in the floor, finally coming to rest in a tangled heap. A nearby torch lying on the ground—the same torch the cult leader had dropped—cast a flickering yellow light across the room, and filled the air with greasy, oily smoke. They spent several seconds staring at the domed ceiling and gasping for breath.

"You okay?" said Dash.

Derring gritted her teeth and sat upright. "Bruised, but not bloody. Definitely not broken."

Dash stood up and shook the dust off her wings. "Any landing you can walk away from, right?"

"I hear that." Derring stood up and took the torch, hitching it to a strap built into the side of her saddlebag. She looked up at the narrow hole in the center of the ceiling. "Looks like they closed it back up... we'd better look around."

"We're not seriously going to try and fix this thing, are we?"

"Of course we won't."

Dash arched an eyebrow. "Are we gonna try and break it even more?"

"Of course we will." Derring brushed some of the dust off her jacket. "Though I'd settle for finding another exit."

Dash flapped her wings and explored the upper half of the room. "I see a balcony up here, all along the wall... there's a couple corridors."

"I'm more worried about this room, right now." Derring walked to the edge of the room and began searching the walls. "There's a few inscriptions here, but they don't make any sense."

"Different language?"

"No, it's Aduu... but the words don't have any meaning. The context is all funny." She paused by a particularly large inscription and brushed away a thick curtain of vines. "The alphabet is the same, but the words are all strung together in different ways."

Dash hovered sideways, scanning each of the shadowy corridors leading off the balcony. "Any of 'em look familiar."

"Something about a storage or resting place for something important. The name reminds me a bit of the ruin where we found the prism." Derring leaned closer to the wall and squinted. "I still can't tell what sort of place this is, though... a vault or a warehouse, maybe?"

Dash glanced down at her, but gasped when she caught sight of the raised platform they'd landed on in the center of the room.

"Derring? I think it's... that kind of resting place."

Derring looked away from the wall and turned to the platform. She walked across the room and climbed up the small central pyramid built into the floor, and Rainbow Dash landed beside her. The top of the stone platform was a rectangular slab sculpted with the shape of a beautiful young mare: she was lying on her back with her front legs crossed over her chest and her eyes were closed. There were exposed grooves and slots in the sculpture along her neck, ankles and forehead. Her hair was a complicated array of loops and whorls, with long tresses that trailed down beside her and merged into the frame of the slab.

"Incredible," Derring-Do whispered. "It's the first thing we've found that says anything about the ponies who lived here."

"It's beautiful... but what about those weird grooves in her neck? Do you think it wasn't finished in time?"

Derring shook her head. "That's probably where they installed the parts that looked like jewelry. Somepony must have found this place before and stolen the treasure. That does make it harder to guess who she was or what she did."

"Grave robbers," Dash sneered. "Stuff like that belongs in a museum."

"Don't be so quick to judge," Derring said. "Technically, we're grave robbers."

"Yeah, but that's different."

Derring-Do turned to give Dash her full and undivided attention. "Why?"

She bit her bottom lip. She rolled her eyes, examining the ceiling.

"For reasons—good ones, too—that I haven't figured out yet." She tapped her hoof on the floor. "We haven't stolen anything yet! That's why!"

"Because we haven't found anything yet," Derring said as she stroked a hoof along the edge of the slab. "There's scrape marks here. There must be a mechanism of some sort to open and close the sarcophagus."

"W-w-what!?" Dash took a nervous step back. "Why would anypony want to open it again!?"

"This sarcophagus might be reserved for ponies of a particular certain rank or status, like a priestess or princess or something... whenever somepony died, they might move the old body to a more appropriate mausoleum and replace it with the most recently departed figurehead."

"Why would anypony do that!?"

"Maybe they believed in reincarnation. Maybe they thought the old priestess would live on in the body of the next priestess. Who knows." Derring went to the other side of the sarcophagus and continued searching. "Funerary rites for the rich and powerful are among some of the weirdest ceremonies you'll ever... aha! Here we go!"

"What? No!" Rainbow Dash flew over the sarcophagus and landed beside her. "Maybe we shouldn't mess around with this! I mean... it's a grave! Somepony could... they could be..." she pointed at the sarcophagus and whispered harshly. "In there!"

Derring grinned. "Exciting, isn't it?"

Dash watched as Derring pressed a small stone block concealed under the edge of the lid. Stone ground against stone and the lid slowly lifted up, supported by a series of slender metal pillars.

Derring peered inside. "Oooh! Looks like the previous grave robbers left the good stuff behind after all."

Dash stepped in place, bouncing on the tips of her hooves. "Oh, no-no-no-no..."

"Come on, you big baby. You can look, as long as you don't touch."

Rainbow Dash crept to the edge of the stone coffin and peered over the edge. Inside was the body of a pony, shrunken and shriveled to little more than a skeleton. It was covered almost entirely in dusty-brown bandages but the few exposed parts had a texture that was somewhere between an ugly scab and rotten, wrinkled tree bark.

Dash stared at it for some time.

Derring-Do pointed at a magnificent array of golden jewelry clasped around the body's neck and ankles. "Looks like the thieves couldn't get it open... still doesn't help us, though. She's wearing an awful lot of jewelry, but the style isn't very distinct and there's no emblems or symbols. Can't tell if it's royal or religious or what. We'll have to take a closer look when we come back."

Derring-Do looked up at the raised lid. "Well, well... looks like there's an inscription on the inside." She took out her journal and began making notes. "Aaaaand score! It's a map of some sort. Might take me awhile to translate it properly, but odds are good it's a map we can use."

Dash continued to stare into the sarcophagus.

Derring put her journal away and tucked her helmet down. "Hey. Whatcha thinking?"

"That's a pony," she said. "A dead pony."

"Yes. Yes it is."

Dash turned to face her, slowly. "We are standing... in a room... with a dead pony."

Derring glanced at the sarcophagus, then gave Dash a quick nod. "Seems so."

Dash sprinted across the room and ran around in tiny little circles, jumping up and down. "Ew-ew-ew-ew-ew!!"

Derring gave her a lopsided smile. "Yeah... you never forget your first time."

For the next quarter-hour, Derring-Do and Rainbow Dash walked through the twisting stone corridors beneath the ziggurat with only the flickering, greasy torch to light their way. They moved slowly, and Derring paused every few steps to examine the walls and floor.

"This is taking forever," Dash said. "Are we even using the right map?"

"It's definitely a map of this place." Derring turned the journal upside down and tilted her head. "But parts of it are all muddled. It's like each little chunk was drawn by a different mapmaker, and none of them were allowed work together."

Dash took care to step over a patch of slimy mold. "The last ruin was so clean and empty," she said, "but this place is full of vines and mold and stuff. How can anything grow down here?"

"No idea. I'm not exactly a botanist." Derring paused to look at the floor tiles. "Another pressure plate here. No wait... there's three of 'em. That's got to be the tenth set of mechanisms we've passed by. I'm going to run out of chalk at this rate."

"Hey look!" Dash pointed ahead at a huge stone wheel built into the wall. "Something tells me these aren't just traps."

"Not all of them," said Derring, "but I'm afraid we don't have time to push random buttons and see what happens." Derring made a note in her journal and continued on. "There should be a big room up ahead. It's not much—"

"Shh!" Dash hissed.

They both froze or several seconds, perfectly quiet.

"I swear I heard something behind us."

"It's just random noises. Nothing more."

Dash shook her head. "No, these sounded just like hoofsteps. They're gone now."

They continued walking for a short distance, until Dash spun around to look behind them.

"I swear I heard hoofsteps! They stopped as soon as we stopped!"

"Let's test something." Derring-Do walked in place, producing some loud hoofsteps of her own. She stopped moving and moments later, the exact same pattern of hoofsteps echoed back to them. They sounded distant and distorted.

Rainbow Dash sighed. "Well now I feel silly."

Derring-Do leaned close and whispered to her. "Don't feel too silly. The cult leader said that others had been sent down here before us. They never came out again... which means they might still be wandering around down here."

Dash nodded.

They continued on down the hallway, haunted by their own steps, and came to a large open room with a large fountain in the middle. The pool was filled with foul-smelling muck and slime, and the sound of dripping water echoed about them. The fountain was comprised of three mares with long flowing hair, all rearing up to hold a large urn in the air between them.

"Not exactly what I was expecting," Derring said as she glanced at her journal. "The map said there would be an important mechanism here... some kind of control system. See if you can find something."

Rainbow Dash flew to the far side of the room and began pulling down vines. "Whoa... check this out!" She pulled away the foliage and revealed a whole cluster of wheels, chains and pulleys.

Derring walked over and stared at the machinery. "The whole wall is one big mechanism," she said. "It looks like it continues on into the floor, too."

"Great! So how do we get it working?"

Derring-Do gave a tiny little shrug. "...Dunno."

"You dunno? What do you mean you dunno!?"

"What did it sound like I meant? I don't have the slightest clue how to get this thing working."

"But you're an archaeologist! This is your bag!"

Derring scowled at her. "Sorry. They didn't require me to take any mechanical engineering courses while I was learning to scrape dirt off broken bits of pottery."

"Yeah... I guess." Dash looked at the machinery. "Think we should start pulling chains at random?"

"You're guess is as good as mine," Derring said. "Just remember, we want to learn about this machine, but we don't necessarily want to get it working."

Dash hovered back and forth in front of the wall of exposed machinery, searching carefully. Finally, she tugged a nearby chain. Something behind the wall ground against something else, but stopped a moment later.

"Go on," Derring said, "keep trying."

Dash began pulling levers and pushing blocks completely at random, waiting just long enough for something to happen. Finally, one of the switches caused the wall to their left to open wide: behind the wall there was a huge, hollow wheel with a heavy bronze chain looped around it.

"Now we're talking!" Rainbow Dash flew over and pushed the wheel from inside. It turned only a few degrees. "Almost... almost!"

"Step aside," Derring said. She climbed into the wheel and began walking in place. She clenched her teeth and scrunched her eyes shut, straining against the massive stone weight... slowly, the wheel began to turn.

Rainbow Dash flew back to the exposed wall and watched in amazement as the tiny cogs and chains began to move. After a moment, the wheel locked into place.

"It's not budging," called Derring.

"I know, I know!" Dash's eyes flicked over the various components, searching for something out of place. She hovered up near the ceiling and tugged a switch. "Anything?"

"Still stuck."

She pushed a nearby stone button, and the wheel began to turn again. A different set of chain loops went into motion.

"Oh that's where that goes!" Dash hovered a little lower, following the path of the chain. "Dangit, I was never any good at these kinda puzzles... I wish Twi was here."

"Dash? I could use a bit of help here!"

"I know, I know. I'm working on it." Dash pointed at one of the adjacent stone cogs. "Lesse now... if that goes there..."

"Dash, do something!"

She looked back and saw the giant wheel spinning rapidly, with Derring-Do stuck inside it: She was sprinting just to keep from tumbling out of control.

"Aaah! Kay! Right!" Dash scanned the machinery and pulled another switch, then pushed two more buttons. She watched as different sections of the wall came alive, shaking off a thick coat of dust and debris. The mechanical energy fed through the machine from one side to the other, one chain at a time, until it finally formed a complete link to the other side. The walking wheel began slowing down, and mechanical noises rumbled all around them.

Derring hopped out of the wheel and brushed her mane back with a sigh. "Wasn't so hard, was it?"

"I guess I got the hang of it," said Dash "but it still doesn't tell us what this thing is supposed to..."

There was a loud sucking sound, wet and goopy. They turned to the fountain and watched as the pool of fetid muck rippled. The liquid drained out, leaving only a thick layer of plant matter, and water began pouring out of the urn built into the statue. It was dark and brackish at first, but soon turned crystal clear.

Derring-Do tilted her head. "That's... ambiguous."

The floor shuddered beneath them. Dust shook free of the ceiling, and the sound of rushing water ran through the walls and ceiling. They tensed up, but nothing happened.

Dash's left ear flipped back. "Think we should hurry?"

"Quite." Derring ran for the exit, but paused at the next corner. "Wasn't this... a left turn when we came in?"

"I guess. Why?"

derring peered around the corner. "Now it goes right."

"Well, yeah, cause we got turned around. If it's left going in, it'll be right going out."

"No, I mean..." Derring shook her head. "Nevermind. Let's just go."

They rushed through the hallways, following their map back towards the entrance. Derring-Do spent most of it frowning quizzically and turning the map sideways or upside down. Despite her confusion, they reached the central chamber without difficulty. Now, though, the room was alive with motion: the ring shaped balcony was rotating along the inside of the wall, and dozens of stone pillars were sliding in and out of grooves in the wall. A constant shower of dust and vines rained down to the floor.

"...Amazing!" whispered Derring-Do.

"Look at the water!" Dash pointed at a nearby section of wall: there was a whole maze of spouts and slides built into the bricks, and trickles of water flowed all throughout them like blood pumping through veins.

"It's like a water clock!" she said. "I saw one in the palace, once!"

Derring looked up at her. "A water what?"

"It's a machine that uses flowing water, instead of chains and gears! See all these channels?" She floated up a few yards and pointed at one of the countless tiny aqueducts. "Water flows through and turns the wheel, and then the wheel opens or closes another channel... and then the water in that channel pushes other wheels, and it just goes on and on."

"You're pulling my leg."

"No no, I've seen 'em! They have one in the palace: a silk-loom that makes sheets of cloth all by itself! It moves the thingamabob, reloads the string, and even stops the machine if you put your hoof in the way." She stared at the vast array of veins built into the walls all around them. "Except that thing was built with tiny little gears and chains. And it wasn't nearly this big.

Derring-Do stared at the vast maze of veins built into the walls. "It's a clockwork apparatus," she said, "built out of water. Phenomenal!"

"Didn't you say before that the whole city could be one giant machine, and the Prism was the key?"

"I wasn't speaking literally," she said. "My stars... the Dzunturans really were more advanced than anypony dreamed!"

Dash landed beside her. "Think we can figure out how the rest of it works?"

She nudged her helmet up. "I know one way to find out." She walked towards the sarcophagus in the middle. "But first I'd like to get another look at that map. Something's not right about it."

Dash followed alongside her. "Heh... that'd make a pretty good catchphrase, you know."

"What are you talking about?"

"You know... cool phrases characters use." Dash spoke in a deeper tone. " 'I know one way to find out!' You say that a lot."

"Twice, Dash. I've only said it twi... I can't believe I'm even having this conversation!"

They walked to the edge of the sarcophagus and looked up at the raised lid. Dash glanced down, briefly, then looked back up again. After a moment, her eyes widened in alarm.

"Derring?"

"Hold on..." Derring-Do took out her journal and made a few corrections. "This is crazy. The map leads where it says it leads, but directions like west and north are totally wrong... it's more like a flowchart than a map."

Dash tapped derring's shoulder. "Derring?"

"I guess that kind of makes sense... if the whole temple is a giant mechanism, then this must be like an engineering schematic. It's not meant to be taken literally."

"Derring... the coffin is empty."

"It's a sarcophagus," she said, ", not a coffin. Sarcophagi are usually designed to remain above ground instead of being buried. I know this one is technically deep underground but it's on display in a public area, so..."

Derring paused and looked down into the sarcophagus. The mummified body, along with all its wrappings and jewelry, was missing. They watched the empty space for some time.

"Forget about it," Derring said. She looked back at the inside of the lid. "I think I can make a little more sense of this thing... there are two other chambers nearby, with similar mechanisms. Unfortunately, I don't see any exits."

"The body is gone," Dash said. "Why is the body gone?"

"It's not our problem right now."

"How can you say that? What if..." She spun to look behind herself, eyes wide. "There! Did you hear that? It sounded like... something!"

"This whole room is full of moving machinery and running water. It's nothing."

"It sounded like something moving! Like... hoofsteps!" Dash's eyes darted left and right. "What if... what if it's... following us!?"

Derring frowned at her. "That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard in my entire life. And considering I've spent the last few days with you, that's quite an accomplishment on your part."

"That doesn't change the fact that the body is missing! Let's hear you explain that with your fancy-shmancy science and logic! You can't, can you!?"

Derring watched her for a moment, bored.

"Perhaps somepony moved the body while we were gone."

"Who!?"

Derring turned back to the lid. "The cult leader said that other ponies were sent down here to investigate, but we know we were the first to open to sarcophagus. They must have noticed it was open and moved the body."

"Why!?" Dash grabbed her own ears and pulled them down. "Why would anypony even do that!?"

"Because the Lunatic Cabal’s membership is made up entirely of lunatics!" Derring shouted. "Now go stand watch for trouble—real, credible threats only, please—and let me study this map in peace and quiet!"

Rainbow Dash glowered at her, frightened and furious at the same time. "Fine. Fine! But this is going to turn into a horrible nightmare, I just know it. You'll see! Any second now, a horrible monster is going to suck our organs out through our noses or something."

"Yes, yes. Now stand guard."

Dash started to turn, but froze in place. Her eyes moved to one side, ever so slightly. "Oh no... she's right behind me, isn't she? I just know she is! I'm gonna turn around, and she's gonna be right there!"

Derring said nothing.

"Right. Well. Better get it over with quick." Dash took a deep breath and flexed her shoulders. She spun around all at once, tensed for battle. Her eyes flicked back and forth, but there was nothing to see.

"Okay. All clear. I'm still alive." She walked down a few of the steps and scanned the room. "...For now, at least."

"Forgive me for containing my enthusiasm," Derring said.

Dash glanced back at Derring, who was twisting around to get a closer look at the inscription. "How can you be so dang cool about all this? Seriously." She turned back to the room just as a skeletal, desiccated body began rising up out of the stone floor. Strips of cloth slithered out from between the stone tiles and congealed into shape, while dry sand flowed up and began filling it out. The cadaver was thicker now, meatier, and the face looked only a little skeletal. It was undeniably the body of a filly, just like the sculpture on the lid of the sarcophagus. Her eyes were black, shadowy holes.

"Here, hold this." Derring passed her the torch without turning to look.

Rainbow Dash took the torch. She clenched her jaw tight and continued to stare at the mummified filly. Her lips trembled, and a tiny, choked squeak escaped her throat.

Hit her. She's right there. Just hit her with the torch and set her on fire. Do something. Anything.

"Dangit..." Derring Do leaned into the sarcophagus and kicked her legs in the air. "Can you hold me in place? There's one last spot that's impossible to reach."

The mummified filly finished congealing. A magnificent array of golden jewelry emerged from within her body, their delicate chains intertwining with the web of cloth strips. She stepped forward, moving with the grace and poise of a dancer... the body beneath the wrappings was curvaceous and nubile.

She took a dainty step towards her. She took half a step backwards, but her muscles trembled helplessly. Her throat was clenched tight. Her skin was cold and clammy under her coat. She couldn't tear her eyes away from the empty black sockets looming in front of her.

Dash's grasp went limp and the torch tumbled to the floor. "W-w-who..."

"Youmgui." Her silken voice was a whisper that reverberated from all directions at once. It was soft and smooth as a razor blade. It rumbled like a peal of distant thunder. There was a deep, metallic hiss as a gleaming black viper slithered out of her left eye socket and licked the air with it's tongue.

The mummified filly tilted her head. "Youmgui Taivan," she said.

Part 15: "What's more important? A friend, or the entire world!?"

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"Youmgui Taivan? That's... Dzunturan, isn't it?"

Derring-Do climbed down from the side of the sarcophagus and turned to Dash, and frowned when she saw her tense, trembling posture. She turned to look at the object of her attention and froze in place herself when she caught sight of the mummified filly standing only a yard away. Her eyes fixated on the slick black viper emerging from the socket of her eye, hanging in the air with a hiss.

Derring darted forward, snatched the torch off the ground and smacked it square against the filly's head. Her skull smashed into a spray of sand and flakes, and her body stiffened and remained standing. Strips of linen cloth dangled from the edge of her neck and streams of silky-smooth sand poured out of the stump. A few sparks from the torch landed on her body, but they sputtered out harmlessly.

Dash and Derring stood side by side, gasping for breath. The air was thick with the smell of cinnamon, strong and spicy.

"Well," Derring said, "that was—"

The strips of cloth slithered and writhed out of her severed neck and wove back into the shape of a head. Sand filled it up from within, and as soon as it congealed it regained the gooey, fleshy texture it had before.

"Che yamaar bain?" she said. Her voice was soft and gentle, and yet it reverberated with the strength of a peal of thunder.

"She's talking," Rainbow Dash hissed.

Derring-Do stared at the dessicated figure.

Dash jabbed her side. "You're the linguist! Say something!"

She flinched. "Right. Right. Name. Who... who are... Tanii ner heng be?"

"Youmgui Taivan. Che ulsej bainuu?"

Derring-Do stared at her in alarm.

"What? What'd she say?"

"She wants to know... if we're hungry."

Dash nodded to the filly. "We're fine, thanks!"

Derring-Do cleared her throat. "Be... ulsuugui... bain," she said.

The filly took a dainty step towards them. Derring-Do and Rainbow Dash took a step backwards, huddling together.

"Che tsangaj bainuu?"

"No, we're not... argh!" Derring tapped the top of her helmet. "What's the word for 'thirsty' again?"

The filly peered at them. "Tanii ner heng be?" Her eyes, though empty, were still quite expressive.

"What's that mean?"

Derring bit her lower lip. "She wants to know who we are."

There was a moment of silence.

"Who are we?" whispered Dash.

"I haven't decided yet," she said, "but we're not thieves, right?"

"Nope. Definitely not thieves."

Derring-Do cleared her throat. "Bi toorchihloo."

The filly tilted her head to one side.

Derring nodded quickly. "Bi yaj galt teregnii buudald ochih ve?"

The filly frowned at her. "Getegür?"

"What? No!" Derring-Do shook her head. "No, we're not thieves!"

The filly's frown darkened. "Getegür."

Derring-Do waved a hoof, frantically. "No-no-no not at all! It was just a misunder—Uuchlaarai! Buruu oilgoltschih shig bolloo!"

The filly stepped towards them, scowling. "Yegüdel." Her sides and belly wriggled, and scaly black bodies began crawling out from between the bandages.

"No! We haven't... Bi buruu um hiig... uh... hiigee..." Derring-Do hooked a front leg around Rainbow Dash's neck and pulled her along as she ran to the nearest entrance. "Just run for it!"

Rainbow Dash bolted after her. "Why are we running!? We're acting like thieves!"

"She said 'Yegüdel': that's the Dzunturan word for death, misfortune and destruction!"

"Why would she say that? What did you tell her!?"

"I think she knows we're foreigners. I... may have inadvertantly asked her for directions to the nearest train station."

Dash glared at her, wide-eyed. "You what!?"

"I don't know how to pronounce Dzunturan words!" she shouted. "Nopony does! All I've ever seen is writing, and the tribe that rescued us wasn't exactly verbose!"

They reached the nearest exit, but Dash skidded to a halt.

Derring glanced back at the main hall and saw the mummified filly walking towards them at a brisk, elegant trot. "What are you waiting for? She's following us!"

Dash pulled some vines away from the wall and pushed a little stone block. A heavy grid of bronze bars slammed down behind them and sealed off the entrance.

"All right!" Dash said. "I think I'm getting the hang of these things!"

"You just locked us out of the only room with a known exit!" Derring shouted. "How are we supposed to get out!?"

"We'll figure something out later." Rainbow Dash turned to the Mummified Filly and waved at her through the bars. "Hey! Better luck next time!"

The filly walked towards them without pause or hesitation. Her body flowed between the bars, transforming into sand and cloth just long enough pass through. She reemerged on the other side without interrupting her gait.

"You gotta be joking," whispered Dash.

"Muurand togloom hulgand ukhel," said the mummified filly.

Derring and Dash bolted through the hallway and the filly's hoofsteps pursued them without fail. Now that water was flowing throughout the temple, all the traps and mechanisms had come to life: there were pressure plates and switches everywhere, forcing them to hop, skip and jump over hidden obstacles... with each pause or hesitation, the smell of cinnamon powder grew stronger.

They reached a large room with a fountain, much like the last, but filled with sand instead of water. Dash flew to the far-facing wall and examined the clusters of chains and cogs. "I think I can figure this out," she said, "but I need more time!"

Derring-Do glanced down the hall and saw a glint of gold jewelry. "We don't have time!"

Dash hovered back and forth across the machinery. "Here... this switch should close off the room!"

"That didn't work last time!"

Dash set a hoof on the switch and watched the entrance.

"What are you waiting for!?" shouted Derring. "Do something!"

Dash squinted, resolute.

The mummified filly stepped into the archway of the entrance. Dash threw the switch and a massive stone slab crashed down on top of their pursuer. She collapsed like an empty bag, and a spray of sand splashed across the floor.

"That should buy us a few seconds!" Rainbow Dash pointed across the room. "There's a switch over there: see what it does!"

Derring ran over to the wall and pulled the switch. She gasped as the floor rumbled beneath her: the stone block under her hooves raised out of the floor and clicked into place.

"An elevator?" she said.

"Dangit!" Dash pulled another switch back and forth several times, but nothing happened. "I think we gotta pull two of these switches at the same time!"

"How am I supposed to reach them?" Derring-Do said. "I can't fly!"

Dash hovered in place for some time, examining the machine. "Do you trust me?"

Derring clenched her jaw. "Let's assume for the sake of argument that I do!"

"Then do exactly what I say!"

She swallowed, but nodded.

Dash poked at the machinery, and the stone in front of Derring-Do slid up into the ceiling. Another block slid out from the wall, sideways, forming a platform.

"Move to the next block!"

Derring hopped forward and yelped as a stone block slammed down behind her.

"Are you sure you know what you're doing!?"

"That's why it's called trust!"

The massive stone blocks slid back and forth, up and down, in and out. Dash called out to her: hop across the gap. Climb up. Stay where you are. Derring-Do followed her instructions to the letter, watching the ten-ton blocks whip past her with the speed and strength of a freight train.

"Almost there!" shouted Dash.

Derring-Do glanced at the floor below, three stories down, and saw a slight ripple in the pool of sand. The mummified filly's head peeked out from the surface.

"We got company!"

"Don't move!" Dash shouted back. "I can't afford to lose track of this!"

She watched as the filly stepped out of the sand pool and glanced around the room, as curious as a child. She casually walked to the wall beneath her.

"I think she's onto us, Dash!"

"Dangit! Just... just stay put for now. I'll figure something out!" She pulled a switch.

A block lifted up in front of her, and a second one lowered down. The filly calmly stepped onto it and waited patiently.

"Okay now... oh, wait." Dash scrambled to find another switch. "No, we definitely don't want to do that. Let's try this instead..."

The blocks shuffled positions again, grinding against each other. When they finished moving, Derring-Do and the mummified filly were standing at about the same height, with only a few blocks between them. Derring leaned sideways to get a better look at her adversary, and saw the filly doing the same to her.

"Okay, now... as soon as the block in front of you moves out of the way, I need you to step onto the block directly in front of you. Got it?"

"What!? But she's right there!"

"Just do it! If you trust me, you'll do it!"

Derring flexed her muscles, trying keep herself from shaking. The blocks slid apart, opening a clear path all the way to the end of the wall. Derring stared at the filly, directly ahead of her, with a swarm of black vipers slithering along at her heels.

"Step forward! Now!"

Derring stepped onto the block ahead of her, coming face to face with Youmgui Taivan. The temple guardian strode towards her, stoic and displeased, but Derring-Do stood her ground. She could see a stone switch on the wall behind her.

A pair of massive stone blocks slammed down from the ceiling, directly in front of and behind Derring-Do. Youmgui gave a startled look, as if she'd twisted an ankle while trying to walk in high-heels. Her body collapsed again, sending a cascade of sand to the floor below.

A moment later, the block in front of her retracted. The sand and snakes were gone.

"Go for it!" shouted Dash.

Derring dove forward and went to the switch. "Pushing the switch on the mark of one. Three... two..."

"One!" said Dash.

They pushed the switches. The blocks began retracting all at once, and Derring leaped towards the middle of the room. Dash caught her in midair and they glided to the floor together. Moments later the room quaked violently: they braced themselves to keep from falling over.

Derring picked her helmet off the floor and put it back on. "That sounds bad."

"We didn't want to fix anything, right?" Dash said. "I hope we didn't fix it by accident."

There was a deafening explosion of shattered stone. The room shuddered violently and the floor tilted beneath them: Dash took to the air, but Derring-Do slid sideways and landed in the fountain of sand.

"I gotcha!" Dash flew down and hauled her back out again.

"I'm fine," she said as she stood up. "It's only a few inches deep."

The mummified filly leaped out of the pool like a shark breaching the surface of an ocean. She grappled with Derring's hind leg and her linen bandages flowed over the limb like a net of vines. Derring fell the floor with a scream and began kicking back: each blow sent a spray of sand flying, but the filly's head reformed in a matter of moments.

The room tilted again and the pool of sand splashed out of the shallow fountain. Derring and Dash braced themselves, but Youmgui tumbled back and landed against the wall. They scrambled to pull the cloth wrappings off of Derring's leg.

Dash nodded towards the filly. "Her mama certainly didn't raise a quitter."

"She is making things rather difficult for us," Derring-Do said. "I'm all out of ideas."

They watched as the filly stood up and shook her mane out: the bandages slithered up along her neck, and her elaborate hairstyle reformed itself. She was standing directly in front of the room's only exit.

Dash frowned. "Who the heck is she? How much do we know about her?"

"Not much. She was entombed in a place of prominence, and she's got gold jewelry... but she doesn't seem to be a priestess or a princess."

"What about her name? Youmgui?"

"It's not a name at all," Derring said. " 'Youmgui taivan' is Aduu. It means 'nothing in particular' or 'nothing of consequence'."

Dash called out to the filly. "Hey! Are you Dzunturan?"

"Jüün Turu'un," she said, mildly irritated.

"Oh. Sorry." Dash turned to Derring. "What was she saying before, when we first met her?"

"She asked if we were hungry. Or thirsty."

Dash watched Youmgui as she walked towards them. "...Do you think she was a slave? Like, the servant of a king or queen or something?"

Derring arched an eyebrow. "That... is quite possible. In some ancient cultures, the servants of royalty were entombed with their masters, to protect and serve them in the next life."

Dash worked her jaw back and forth. "...Tell her we're thirsty."

Derring glared at her. "We're what?"

Dash rolled her eyes, expansively. "Oh boy am I thirsty! I could drink a whole bucket of water!"

Derring glanced between her and the approaching filly. "I'm, uh... Tsangaj!"

Youmgui stopped in her tracks. "...Tsangaj?"

Derring nodded. "Be tsangaj bain."

They stared at each other for some time. The catacombs quaked all around them.

"Che yu uumaar baina?" the filly said.

"Water," Derring said. "Water's... uh... Be us ohmeer bain." She glanced at Dash. "What about you? Does water sound good?"

"Yeah, water's fine."

Youmgui looked at them, conflicted. "Uuchlaarai."

"No problem!" Derring said. "I mean... Zugair zugair."

The filly dissolved into a tiny whirlwind of sand that drifted across the floor and faded into nothing.

The floor quaked again. They bolted for the exit and ran through the corridor, following their path back to the central chambers. They skidded to a halt as the corridor began rotating around them: they slid along the floor and began walking along the wall, and then along the ceiling.

"This is crazy!" shouted Rainbow Dash. "The whole place is turning inside out!"

"We'll never find the central chamber like this! We need an exit, now!"

"Well whaddya expect me to do about it!?"

"You're the only one of us who can figure out these devices! You need to—"

The corridor came apart in the middle and pulled them apart. A flash of light blinded them, and a frigid gust of wind chilled them to the bone. Derring stumbled backwards and threw a hoof over her eyes. Eventually, her vision adjusted to the brightness.

But... but this is... impossible!

She saw sky and clouds all around. The stone corridor they were standing in was actually a hollow shaft suspended in the sky, like an air duct. She crept to the edge and looked around: she could see all the other halls and rooms they'd explored... a vast, three dimensional maze of narrow struts and beams. She could see mountains to each side of them and the ancient capital city far below. The massive buildings crumbled like sandcastles as the network of catacombs uprooted themselves from the depths of the world. Massive chunks of earth and rock shook loose and fell to the ground in an avalanche of destruction.

Derring-Do stared at the architecture of the temple itself, now fully exposed to the open sky: it was a maze of beams and arcs, arranged like a gyroscope. The shafts and platforms were moving and unfolding themselves into complex shapes and patterns of no discernable purpose. She took one step closer to the precarious edge of the corridor, risking the gale force winds to look upwards. She could see the same ziggurat they'd snuck into before: it was now the uppermost point of the flying structure.

Dash leaped into the air and flew to where Derring was standing. "We gotta find another way around!"

"You can fly!" shouted Derring. "Go to the top and stop them by yourself!"

"But you'll be stuck here!"

"Forget about me!" Derring shouted. "You have to stop this engine once and for all! That's all that matters!"

"You expect me to run off and let you die here, all alone!?"

Derring-Do shoved her shoulder. "What's more important? A friend, or the entire world!?"

"Don't talk to me about friendship!" Dash shouted. "A world where I have to abandon my friend is a world that isn't worth living in!"

Derring stared at the wild fury in her eyes.

"We've saved each other's lives," Dash said, "and neither of us even cares about keeping count of who owes who. Because friends don't care about debts. They'll always help you, no matter what, even if you don't believe in them. Well guess what? I'm your freakin' friend! Derring-Do, the meanest, bitterest, most insensitive pony in the whole world has a friend!"

Dash held out her hoof.

"We only got this far because we were together," she said, "and we only have a little further to go. I know you don't need me, and I don't need you... but we need each other."

Derring stared up at her, bewildered. "You're crazy."

"Sometimes, crazy works." Dash continued to hold her hoof out. "Let's finish this together. I promise, no matter what happens, we'll make it out of here alive. Both of us."

Derring reached out and clapped her hoof against Dash's. "I must admit... I'm curious to see how this ends."

Rainbow Dash grinned at her. "The hallmark of a good story!"

She lowered her flight goggles into place over her eyes. Derring-Do re-tied the chin strap on her pith helmet. They walked to the edge of the stone bridge and gazed out at the whirling maze of narrow platforms. The wind whipped their manes about, and Derring-Do squinted at the early morning sun.

"Now!" Dash shouted.

Derring-Do leaped into the air. Rainbow Dash swept over her, and they hooked their front legs together: they glided down at a steep angle, just as a narrow stone platform slid into place below them. Derring let go and tumbled onto the platform, running along it's length while Rainbow Dash wheeled overhead. The inside-out maze of stone shafts and pillars twisted and cavorted all around her: a massive slab swung past and Derring leaped onto it, clinging to the edge and climbing up. From there she leapt onto a stone disk covered with metal rods. She ducked and bobbed between the rods and leapt onto the side of a vertical gear, riding it up higher. She leaped sideways an instant before another gear crushed her: she grabbed onto the edge of a narrow ledge, but her hoof slipped and she plummeted down.

Before she could scream, Rainbow Dash swept out of nowhere and clamped her forelegs around hers, carrying her along to the next lower platform. Derring sprinted across the surface of the floating engine, leaping between cogs and struts and chains. The air buffeted her from all sides, and her head reeled with vertigo... but never once did she lose sight of the rainbow-colored trail following alongside her.

"Up!" Rainbow Dash shouted. "Keep going up!"

Derring ran along the narrow edge of a metal ring, desperate to keep balance. "Do you see any controls anywhere? Anything you can use to move the maze?"

"There's... whoa!"

Derring glanced to the side and saw a massive, silver shape emerge from a nearby cloud bank: a familiar zeppelin was rising from the pearly wall of mist like a breaching whale.

"The HMS Imbrium!" Derring shouted. "They made it! Professor Walski must still be alive!"

"That's impossible!" said Dash. "How did they find us?"

Derring reared up on her hind legs and waved frantically. "Hey, over here!"

Three tiny shapes dropped from the belly of the zeppelin. They curved through the air and flew directly towards them, moving together in an arrow. Dash swooped down and tackled Derring just as a storm of incandescent sparks ricochet of the platform. The steel-grey fighter planes spread apart at the last moment and swerved away, buzzing like hornets.

Derring looked up as the planes wheeled around or a second pass. "They were shooting at us!?"

"I don't think they work for Perez," Dash said. "Not anymore, at least. Look."

Derring watched the zeppelin as it emerged from the clouds completely. There were a row of huge banners hanging along it's side: deep blue cloth emblazoned with a silver crescent that was crossed in the middle by a wavy dagger.

"The Lunatic Cabal," Derring whispered, harshly. "I swear, if they've done anything to Perez..."

"Either that, or Perez is trying to finish us off." Dash looked at the three fighter planes, swooping for another pass. "Move! Move!"

Dash bolted through the air, and Derring ran along the surface of the twisting machinery. The fighter plane's heavy cannons cracked like thunder, and a hail of glowing lead filled the air: Derring dropped down and hung from the side of the platform: after the ricochets stopped, she hauled herself up and continued running. One of the other planes went into a dive but swerved away when a trail of rainbow light crossed it's path: it turned sharply and chased after the trail.

Derring-Do ran on, watching as the first plane struggled to track it's tiny target. Dash flew in a straight, predictable line for just a moment, but that was enough: The plane opened fire, dead center, but Dash darted out of the way. One of the other planes flew out from behind a huge stone pillar and directly into the line of fire: the bullets tore into it's left wing with a fiery explosion, and the plane shook violently.

A shadow spread over the floating catacombs as the Zeppelin itself drew nigh. Derring looked up and saw a volley of cables launch out of the forward facing crew cabin. A dozen stallions in black longcoats slid down the cables and landed on top of a nearby wall, retracting the cables as they landed.

Those grapple guns... the leader of the security force was using one of those!

She watched as they began swarming over the catacombs, shouting orders. Derring-Do clenched her jaw and ran towards them at a full sprint: one of them glanced back at her and began shouting orders. The stallions turned to point their launchers at her, and the grabber-claws clamped together to form needle-sharp harpoons.

Derring quickened her pace. The stallions leveled their weapons but a blinding strobe of colored light dazzled them. Derring closed the distance and spun around, kicking one of the stallions square in the chest with both hind legs and sending him flying into two others. She reared up and boxed her front hooves against the nearest stallion's jaw, and sent him sprawling. One of the others leveled his giant harpoon gun at her: she threw a hoof-full of dirt in his face, charged forward, and headbutted him: he plummeted off the platform with a terrified wail, and landed on a lower platform with a painful thump.

"Wilhelm! No!" One of the other stallions took out a steel-framed compound crossbow and pointed it at her. "You'll pay for that, you sun-loving weakling!"

Derring charged forward. The crossbow snapped, and the steel bolt struck her helmet and sent a jolt all through her neck. She reared up to kick at him, and he raised his crossbow to block: they wrestled over control of the weapon until Derring finally pulled it loose. She bit down on the handle and swung it like a club, knocking the stallion out.

A hail of heavy cannon fire caught her attention. She turned and saw Dash weaving through the air with a pair of fighter planes right behind her: her evasive movements were frantic and desperate.

Derring snatched up one of the heavy grapple guns with her wing, aiming the bulky weapon with ease. She watched Dash's path, patiently, and fired the harpoon at the last second. The spike clamped onto a platform a few dozen yards away, with the cable hanging across the wide open space. Derring took the weapon and ran circles around a nearby pillar, wrapping the cable around it. Dash flew past, and one of the pursuing planes caught the wire dead on and tore off a chunk of it's wing. The plane tumbled wildly out of control and burst into flames. Derring saw a parachute deploy, but the cloth caught on the edge of a giant brass tube: the pilot slammed against it's surface and went limp.

Derring watched as the last of the fighter planes followed Dash through an obstacle course of stones, pillars and blocks. She slipped between a pair of giant pendulums and through the spokes of a giant wheel, but the fighter plane pursued her skillfully. She turned one last corner with a breathtaking ninety-degree swerve, tucked her wings close, and slipped through a hole in a wall less than a meter wide. The plane careened around the impossible turn and crashed into the teeth of a pair of giant gears: the vehicle exploded in a ball of wet, greasy fire and filled the air with a sparkling cloud of metal wreckage.

Dash glided over to Derring's platform, with a huge grin on her face. "Hey, slowpoke!"

Derring gasped and pointed at several torn feathers on her left wing. "Are you all right?"

"One of the volleys got a little too close for comfort, but all they got was feathers. I'll be just fine."

A metal claw slammed into Dash and pressed her up against the wall. She struggled to pull the clamp off her neck, to no avail. Derring-Do pointed her own launcher at the new threat, but gasped when she saw who it was: the black stallion in the black longcoat, holding Professor Walski in front of himself as a shield. He had a huge rotary-mounted harpoon cannon attached to the side of his saddle. Perez's outfit was ripped and dirty and she had a badly bruised eye, but she was still strong enough to struggle against him.

The black stallion grinned. "Professor Do, I presume?"

Derring leveled the weapon on them. "Professor? How are you feeling?"

"Don't give him anything, Miss Do. Not one thing!"

"Oooh, nooo!" The stallion said, "Not that! Anything but that! You wouldn't dream of giving me something, would you?"

Derring clenched her jaw. "Let her go."

"Because if you did give me something, I'd have to let all three of you live..." He pursed his lips in a mockery of extreme sorrow. "And then I wouldn't get to have any fun at all! Not even a little!"

"Just... tell me what you want."

Perez thrashed anew. "Whatever he says, don't believe it! Don't you dare!"

"Dare!" The stallion blew a raspberry. "You told Derring not to dare! Do you realize how funny that was? Do you?"

Derring bit her lower lip. "Let's not..."

The stallion's face twisted with rage. "Do you!?" he roared. He tightened his grip around Perez's neck and she let out a startled gasp. "When something is funny, Miss Do... you are supposed to laugh."

"Stop it! She can't breathe!"

"Laugh!"

Derring let out a nervous little giggle. The stallion joined in, louder and louder.

"Let go of her!" Derring shouted. "Just tell me what you want, and I'll do it!"

"He's faking!" shouted Rainbow Dash. "They both are! She's working with him!"

The stallion's eyes opened wide, and his mouth formed a perfect circle "Oooo-hoo-hoo! That's even better!" He locked eyes with Derring again, grinning giddily. "It really is an act! She's been on my side the whole time, from the very beginning! In fact, I'm not crazy at all! I'm perfectly... incredibly sane! I'm just pretending!"

"Blast 'em both!" Dash shouted. "You gotta!"

Derring glanced between Dash and Perez. Sweat trickled down her brow.

"It's all an act on the stage of life... isn't it? In the end, we're all court jesters. Every last one of us." The stallion tightened his grip around Perez's neck again, grinning giddily. "Some of us know it... and some of us like it."

Dash struggled against her restraint. "Don't listen to them!"

Derring-Do dropped the grapple gun and stepped away from it. "Stop it! Please just stop hurting her! I'll do whatever you want, I swear!"

The stallion sighed, unhappily. He let go of Perez, and she took out a tiny crossbow of her own and pointed it at Derring.

"Your saddlebags, miss Do. If you please."

Derring stared at her, aghast. "Perez... no! Don't you know who they are!?"

She scowled at her. "I told you before, I have investors to worry about. The saddlebags, Miss Do."

Derring-Do took off her saddlebags and slid them towards Perez. She picked them up and passed them to the Black Stallion. "Cutting it a little close, don't you think?"

"I didn't frighten you, did I sweetums?"

He reached over to stroke her hair, but she slapped his hoof away in disgust. "Take her bags to the sanctum and I'll study her journals later. I'll transport the prisoners myself."

"Really? Are you sure you don't want to study her notes as soon as possible?"

She shoved his shoulder and scowled at him. "After that inexcusable little 'prank' you pulled last time, it's obvious you can't be trusted to keep prisoners alive."

A troop of uniformed stallions marched towards them, weapons at the ready. The black stallion locked eyes with Perez for several seconds, meeting her stern look with a broad, rigid smile.

One of the soldiers glanced between them. "Kommandant?"

"Do as the lady commands," he said, "and then be sure to escort her to the sanctum. We have much to discuss."

Dash and Derring held up their hooves, grudgingly, and allowed themselves to be led off. One of the soldiers flinched as Derring walked past him. "The mark of death!" he said.

The other guards all gasped in horror.

Perez frowned at him. "What?"

She looked at Derring's left hind leg: there was an ugly purple bruise just under her cutie mark, centered around four neatly arranged pin-prick wounds. The injury bore an uncanny resemblance to a skull.

"The bite of the black lotus viper!" one of the other guards said. "She is cursed to die!"

Perez peered at the bite mark. "How long have you had this?"

Derring shook her head, perplexed. "It's the first I've noticed it."

Perez turned to the guards. "Have a doctor waiting for us when we arrive, and make sure he brings an anti-venom kit. One of our prisoners requires medical attention."

"But... but she is cursed! No medicine will—"

Perez grabbed hold of his collar and dragged him close with a scowl. "If I find out that either of these ponies have been killed or injured, you and your master will pray the curse gets you before I do. Am I perfectly clear?"

He nodded. "Jawohl, fraulein Walski."

Part 16: "Finally, she figures it out."

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Rainbow Dash and Derring-Do looked up as Perez and the high priest approached the heavy iron bars of their bleak, stone cell. They had a troop of guards behind them: the stallions in black long coats marched side by side with the silver-masked cultists in midnight-blue robes. Perez opened the prison door and went inside.

"Are you feeling well enough to stand up, Miss Do?"

Derring-Do scowled at her, and stood up without a word.

The cult leader approached her and examined the ugly snake bite on her flank. The purple bruise had turned black and the hair overtop of it had fallen out in a neat little pattern. It looked almost exactly like a skull.

"The fang marks of the Black Lotus Viper," he said. "There can be no mistake. She will die soon."

"Fetch an antivenom immediately," said Perez.

The priest shrugged. "There are none. Not for this."

"Then make one," she said, tersely.

"The guardian of the crypts has afflicted her with the death curse. One cannot cure destiny."

Derring sighed. "Not this again."

Perez arched an eyebrow. "Again? What do you mean?"

The cult leader nodded to her. "She plundered the city of Still Waters and removed the sacred stone from its most holy resting place. For this, she is cursed to die."

"What about the wise-witch of the lost tribe?" said Rainbow Dash. "She told me you were going to die soon. Does that count as a curse?"

Derring shook her head. "Doubtful. She was just pointing it out to you."

Perez frowned at her. "How many times can one mare be cursed to die?"

Derring-Do gave her a bored look. "...Today, you mean?"

Perez stared at her for a moment. She then turned to the cult leader. "You can at least create a cure for the physical symptoms of a snake bite."

"There are no symptoms," he said. "There will be no pain, no infirmity, before the end."

"Go!" Perez shouted.

The cult leader watched her for a moment, utterly bland and disinterested. He exited the cell and followed his robed bodyguards away.

Perez stepped out of the cell and locked the door behind her. "Dismissed," she said to the remaining guards.

They marched off down the hall, leaving the three of them alone.

"It was never my wish for you to come to harm," said Perez. "Zweibrücker was acting alone when he dropped your plane out of the zeppelin's hanger. I had nothing to do with it."

"You're working for the lunatics," said Derring. "What did you think was going to happen?"

"I didn't know it was them!" hissed Perez. "I've had dozens of different investors throughout my career, and it turns out the Cabal had its hooks in every last one of them. They control over a dozen global industries, and have more resources than most small countries you could name. By the time they told me the truth the expedition was already underway. There was nothing I could do about it."

"You could've quit. You could've told the princess. You could have done anything at all, besides roll over like an obedient dog."

"They don't take well to rejection. You know full well they would've had me killed as soon as I took one step out of line. What would you have me do?"

Derring-Do's frown darkened. "...Most ponies would be proud to die for their princess."

Perez met her gaze. "I've spent the last thirty years of my life searching for the truth. Nations come and go. Thrones rise and topple. But the truth... the truth is the only thing worth dying for."

Rainbow Dash watched the two mares.

Derring's frown faded into a look of awe. "You've destroyed us all," she said.

Perez Arched an eyebrow. "Finally, she figures it out."

Rainbow Dash glanced between them. "What? Understands what?"

Derring said "the old legends claim that before their civilization fell, some Dzunturans fled the city to live as nomads. They vowed that they would never again set hoof in that abandoned city... nor would any of their ancestors, no matter how distant."

Rainbow Dash's eyes widened. "You mean... she's a descendant!?"

"Why else would I spend a lifetime searching for this place?" said Perez. "At first all I wanted was to find my home, or a hint about my past. But as you now know, other opportunities presented themselves. The Lunatic Cabal knew that only a pony of true Dzunturan lineage could have any hope of operating the engine of eternity. They're superstitious about such things as prophecies."

Derring-Do scowled at her. "The prophecies also say that the Dzunturan vowed never to return to the city. And that if they did, a terrible curse would bring them to complete and utter ruin... they would suffer catastrophe such as even the gods have never before witnessed. The moment you set hoof in this city you destroyed yourself, along with any hope of understanding your past. You have nopony to blame but yourself."

Perez pursed her lips. "A pitiful deception, Miss Do."

"She's not lying," said Rainbow Dash. "It's the truth."

"Then she's simply in error. An amateurish error, at that: the Aduu word for 'curse' is very similar to—"

"I've made no mistake," Derring said, "I know what I heard."

"And would you be willing to stake your professional reputation on this interpretation of yours?"

"I've already staked my life on it."

Perez turned to leave.

Rainbow Dash rushed to the bars and called after her. "They're still alive!"

Perez paused to look back at her.

"There's a whole tribe of Dzunturan living in the jungle! They've been there for centuries, and their culture hasn't changed a bit! Let us out of here, and we'll bring you to them! Once we stop the cabal, you'll never have to worry about them coming after you ever again!"

Perez gave her a derisive sniff and walked away.

Dash shouted after her. "What do you need this stupid city for when you could actually meet your ancestors face to face? They're your family! Argh!" Dash kicked at the bars. "Stupid, stubborn mare! She's every bit as bad as the cultists!"

She looked back and saw Derring-Do sitting on the floor, facing the wall.

She walked over and sat beside her. "What's wrong? Do you wanna talk about it?"

Derring remained silent.

Dash took a slow breath. "Perez was your hero for the longest time. I know how much it hurts to find out what she's really like... but you can't blame yourself. She's made her own decisions."

She watched her for awhile, sitting perfectly still.

"So... I know it hurts now, but it won't hurt forever. It's okay to be sad or angry. And... if you wanna talk about it... about anything at all... I'm here for you. Even if you just need a shoulder to cry on. And that's okay too."

Dash looked around the cell, saw nopony watching, and sidled up against her. She held her front leg out and awkwardly put it around Derring's shoulders.

"Don't touch me!" Derring screamed at her. "Don't ever touch me, ever again! My life is a misery because of you! I wish we'd never met!!"

She shoved her away and scampered sideways, sitting in the corner of the cell with her head down.

After a minute or so, Dash walked over and sat next to her again. She hugged Derring around the neck. She let out a tiny sniffle, and her shoulders shook. She slumped against her and pressed her tear-stained face against Dash's neck. Her sobs grew louder and more ragged, like the strangled cries of a wounded animal.

"I'm sorry! I'm so... so sorry!"

Dash hugged her tighter. "It's okay. Really."

Derring-Do struggled to speak in between strangled chokes. "You were right about her before. Perez and Zweibrücker were working together, but I didn't believe it... I didn't want to believe it. I trusted a childhood hero I'd never even met, and ignored the only friend I've ever had in the world... we've been through so much together, and I chose her over you just because of how many books she's published! Because of how famous she is!"

"Shh... it's okay."

"It's n-n-not okay!" Derring sputtered. "You're g-g-gonna die here because of me... the only friend I've ever had in the world, and it's my fault you're gonna die!"

Dash lifted her up slightly and hugged her tighter.

Several hours later, the guards took them out of the cell and escorted them to the uppermost point of the flying catacombs: a great circular planetarium with a domed ceiling, held up by a dozen massive stone pillars. The room was open and exposed and the cloudy sky was clearly visible between the columns that supported the dome. Frigid wind whipped throughout the interior, and there was a faint dusting of frost on the walls.

The guards led Rainbow Dash and Derring-Do to the outer wall and tied them both to a wooden stake. Other guards filed into the room, standing guard around a circular hole in the middle of the floor. The sound of stone-and-bronze machinery filled the air and a great stone platform rose up from the hole, bringing with it the engine of eternity: the massive gyroscope expanded to full size as it emerged, dominating the center of the room. The guards all stared in awe as it whirled and rotated around itself. Perez, who had been standing on the platform as it arrived, was focusing her attention on a clipboard.

"Ahh, professor!" Zweibrücker stepped out of the crowd and climbed up onto the platform. "How goes the procedure? Nothing but good news, I hope?"

"The engine appears to be operational," she said, "but it will take some time to calibrate the balance. All we need is to let it spin up for a few more minutes, and then check for any irregularities."

"Yes, yes..." Zweibrücker stepped up onto the platform and gazed up at the machine, smiling. "We've been waiting quite a long time for this moment... what's a few more minutes?"

The elderly cult leader entered the room with the clear triangular prism on his back, resting on a blue velvet cushion. The crowd of cultists and mercenaries all watched the stone as it passed by, marvelling at its brightness and clarity.

"Install the prism immediately," said Perez. "I'll make the final adjustments as soon as the machine is properly aligned."

Zweibrücker set a hoof on Perez's shoulder. "Fear not, Professor! As soon as you've completed this one little task for us, the Cabal will gladly consider your debts paid off in full."

"All of them?" said Perez.

"Oh yes. I'm fully aware of how much money you've borrowed from our benefactors over the years. I assure you it was a small price to pay, considering the scope and magnitude of what we're about to accomplish!"

"I understand completely."

He stepped close and stroked a lock of hair out of her face. "You've done such good work for us, though... I'm sure we'll have many more opportunities for you in the coming years. Please do consider the benefits of an extended contract."

"Of... course I'll consider. That's very generous."

Zweibrücker turned back to the machine, smiling warmly. Perez climbed off the platform and marched through the crowd, calm and professional. She stopped by the stake that Dash and Derring were tied to.

"I don't suppose you have any last words," she said, "for posterity's sake, at least."

"You're wrong," said Derring. "If you were wrong about such a simple translation, there's no way you can be trusted to operate this machine."

"It really is a common mistake," said Perez. "The words for 'curse' and 'destiny' are quite similar. It's nothing to be ashamed of."

"I know what I heard. You've brought ruin to us all."

Perez nudged her hat up. "You don't actually believe in curses, do you?"

Derring-Do tilted her head. "You don't actually believe in destiny, do you?"

"I believe we create our own destiny. Think about it, Miss Do... would you rather make history, or watch it unfold before you?" Perez leaned in close and lowered her voice. "Thrones really do rise and topple faster than most ponies realize... the Cabal is just another change in the wind. But this machine—this engine—is forever. The Lunatic Cabal are utterly irrelevant in this day and age. They don't matter, and they certainly won't last long, but this elixir will allow us to live on after they're gone and forgotten. Isn't that a small price to pay?"

Rainbow Dash frowned. "And what makes you think you'll live long enough to drink it?"

"Zweibrücker needs me to operate the machine. He wouldn't dare kill me." Perez took a step back. "Good day, Miss Do. Perhaps you will at least live long enough to see which of us is the better linguist."

"Ooh, ooh!" Rainbow Dash struggled against her restraints, bouncing energetically. "I know this one! Can I guess? Me-me-me, lemme guess!"

Perez rolled her eyes. "Youth is wasted on the young."

They watched her walk through the crowd and up onto the stage.

Rainbow Dash leaned over as far as she could. "Zweibrücker is totally gonna betray her, isn't he?"

"Oh yeah," she said. "Big time."

"I don't think I can break through the ropes this time... too thick. Got any ideas?"

Derring-Do's eyes flicked back and forth as she scanned the room, searching the crowd and examining the machine. "Rainbow Dash?"

"Yeah?"

"It's been an honor."

Dash twisted her neck around, trying to look at her. "You don't mean that!"

"I do," Derring said with a warm, friendly smile. "I meant every word of it."

Professor Perez Walski took the clear prism off its blue velvet cushion and carefully inserted it into the base of the engine, clamping it between a set of triangular vice grips. She stepped back and pulled a lever on the base of the machine: the engine instantly ceased its rotation and fell into an unnatural stillness. She pulled two more levers, and the prism quickly spun in place. She put on a pair of heavy, darkened goggles.

"The engine is calibrated!" she shouted. "Release the main etherium valve!"

The soldiers in longcoats nodded, and relayed the orders throughout the temple via radio. Moments later, a narrow beam of light surged up from the base of the engine and struck a facet of the prism: the glassy stone lit up like a solid block of light, pure and white. A cascade of tiny rainbows shone up against the inside of the great domed roof. The rings and loops of the engine spun faster and faster, whipping through the air.

Perez clenched her teeth and struggled with the levers, adjusting the prism a few fractions of a degree at a time. The light grew brighter, and the crowd of cultists all shielded their eyes. A shudder ran through the catacombs.

"Release the secondary etherium valves!" she shouted. "We need more power!"

The cult leader struggled to keep his footing. "No! The temple will shake itself apart!"

"Do as she commands!" Zweibrücker roared. "We've come too far to lose it all to a moment's hesitation!"

The guards relayed the orders, and the beam of light intensified. A shrill ringing shattered the air. Frost crumbled off the walls and sparkled like silver dust in the blinding light. A rippling field of magnetic force formed around the prism, distorting the air around it.

"Almost... almost!" Perez looked up: the domed ceiling was engraved with hundreds of circular symbols, and the dozens of tiny rainbows were aligning themselves perfectly: Perez watched as each individual rainbow was positioning itself to shine on a different symbol.

All at once, the storm of light and sound faded down. The prism now pulsed with a warm glow, and steam rose from its edges with a faint hiss. Perez took a plain metal goblet and quickly set it on a slot beneath the prism. A glistening drop of liquid fellfrom the bottom corner, like the tear of a goddess, and landed in the goblet below.

"It worked," Perez whispered. She pulled her goggles off and picked up the Goblet, utterly transfixed by the single bead of liquid within it. "It really worked! All the legends... all the stories... they were true!"

Zweibrücker cleared his throat. Perez looked up, her trance broken.

"Wait your turn, professor," he said with a smile. "I promise... you'll get what's coming to you."

Perez stood there, mesmerised, with the goblet near her own lips. Eventually, she walked to him and passed the goblet. "Yes, of course. We're not savages, after all."

Zweibrücker took the goblet, reverently, and gazed at its miniscule contents. He swirled the cup around and watched the bead roll along the curved surface. "It's beautiful!"

"It won't keep long," Perez said. "The etherium elixir evaporates quickly."

He put the cup to his mouth and threw his head back, drinking the elixir. He closed his eyes and leaned his head back. The goblet fell to the floor with a clatter: the only sound in the hall.

Perez took a step back. "Sir?"

Zweibrücker broke the silence with a laugh: a harsh, raucous sound. The laughter grew louder, more intense, until he was reeling with rapture. "I can feel it within me... the power! At long last!" He reared up and flexed his muscles, energetically. He turned to Perez with a giddy leer. "And now, of course... I think it is time for your well earned reward!"

He stepped towards her, but moved with an unexpected limp. There was a heavy, metal clunk behind him, and he looked back at his hindquarters: his rear hooves gleamed like metal, with the color of the rising sun. The metallic texture crept up his ankles at a voracious pace. He staggered towards Perez, pulling against the sudden weight: his golden hooves scraped against the floor, clumsy and limp. His body became stiff and lifeless under his coat.

He reared up as the transmutation spread up along his neck. "No... this cannot be! I am invincible! Invincible!!" The alchemical contagion covered his head entirely and froze his face into a grim, twisted grin of rage and terror.

Perez darted forward. "Here's what I think of your debt!" she said as she shoved the golden statue off the platform: Zweibrücker's glittering remains struck the floor below with a dull clang, as stiff and lifeless as any other statue.

"Destroy the traitor!" one of the guards cried out. The soldiers in longcoats immediately pointed their launchers at Professor Walski and fired a volley of deadly harpoons. She stood her ground, and a rippling field of force scattered the deadly missiles aside harmlessly.

"Fools!" she shouted. "How can you control something you cannot even begin to comprehend? The temple city deserves a proper hereditary ruler... a ruler with vision and clarity! A ruler worthy of it's riches!"

The cult leader leaped forward and raised his staff to the ceiling. "All hail the true princess of the Dzunturan! Protect her with your lives, my brothers, and she will lead us to greatness!"

Perez rolled her eyes, but the cultists leaped into action regardless. The robed ponies whirled their deadly silver spears, and the black stallions in longcoats fought back: they had no time to reel their harpoon launchers, but drew their crossbows and loosed a deadly volley of silver-tipped arrows at point blank range. The two forces clashed against each other in a savage, violent fracas and the air rang with demented screams.

Perez watched the melee below her platform. These mindless fanatics actually thought they could take over the world? That's just sad. She glanced across the room, and her eyes locked on a wooden stake near the wall: there was a silver javelin lodged in its side, and a heap of severed ropes were sitting on the floor. Derring-Do and Rainbow Dash were nowhere to be seen.

Perez roared at the cult leader. "The prisoners are loose! If they return to Canterlot, the royal guard will send a whole cavalry troop to stop us! Stop those two from escaping at any cost!”

"At once, my princess!" The elderly stallion sprinted towards the exit, using his staff to knock aside everypony in his path, friend and foe alike.

I suppose they'll be useful a little while longer.

Part 17: "Thus died Derring-Do."

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Rainbow Dash flew through the corridors and Derring-Do sprinted close behind her. The sounds of clashing metal and screaming voices faded into the distance.

"What is wrong with you!?" Derring shouted. "You could see the sky! You could have just flown out of there!"

"I can't just leave you behind! We're a team, and we'll stick together no matter what!"

"Professor Walski is about to gain control of a machine that can create an army of immortal, invincible ponies! We have to warn the princess, no matter what happens to us!"

"I've got a plan." Dash tapped the side of her head. "It's all up here. Trust me, it's a good one."

Derring glared at her, furious. "You! Can! Fly! Just leave me behind and go back to Canterlot!"

"I don't have to leave you! If we can get to the zeppelin and steal a plane, you can fly it back with me. You’re a pilot!"

"And what if the soldiers on the zeppelin capture us? What then!?"

"Zweibrücker's troops are all in the temple," she said, "so there'll only be a few guards left. We can take 'em by surprise!"

"Except for the minor insignificant detail that I can't get to the zeppelin because I can't fly, and you can't carry me!"

"Relax, okay? I'm still figuring that out! Maybe you can use one of those grapple guns!"

"Aargh!" Derring-Do skidded to a halt. "Would you just let go!?"

Dash came to a halt and looked back at her, wide eyed. "W-what?"

Derring pointed at her and opened her mouth to speak, but a sudden rumbling cut her off. The corridor snapped apart in the middle and exposed them to the open air. Dash hovered in place, but Derring-Do went tumbling over the edge: she scrambled to grab hold of something, but fell down.

Dash dove down and snatched her legs, straining to keep aloft. She glided down to a platform below and they landed in a heap.

Dash looked around. "Why is everything moving again?"

"Look out!"

Derring-Do tackled Dash from the side and knocked her out of the way as a massive bronze pendulum swung towards them: it missed them by several inches and scraped the floor of the platform with a shrieking spray of sparks.

Dash shook her head, and a glint of silver caught her eye. She looked up at the grid of shafts and mechanisms above and saw the cult leader standing in the mouth of a corridor. He peered down at them, offered a bored little wave, and turned to examine a nearby set of switches.

"Ohh... that's not good."

"What are you waiting for?" Derring said. "Fly up there and kick his flank!"

"After we've gotten you to safety!"

Derring took off her helmet and smacked it against Dash's jaw. "You're like a dog with a bone, aren't you!? You're so obsessed over this one little thing that you're totally blind to the big picture!"

Rainbow Dash stamped a hoof. "No! I won't let you go! Not like this!"

"You represent loyalty, don't you? Well you need to figure out where your loyalties truly lie: with me, or the entire nation! You can't have it both ways!"

"No, I... no!" Dash took a step back. "There has to be a way! There always is!"

The platform they were standing on gave way and swung down, hanging from one edge. Derring let out a yelp as she fell down, and Dash darted down and grabbed her front leg. This time, there were no other platforms below them: nowhere to glide to. Dash slid down the platform with her and hooked her free foreleg around a stone strut. They dangled in the air together, thousands of yards up.

Dash clenched her teeth and struggled to keep hold of Derring-Do. "Too... heavy!"

Derring Do unclasped her saddlebags and watched them vanish into the expanse of clouds below. She looked up at Dash, terrified. "I don't have anything else!"

"Climb up me! Quickly!"

Derring reached up with her free foreleg. There was a flash of light and a searing bolt of purple lightning smashed against a nearby wall. They looked up at the cult leader, chanting and waving his hooves. A vortex of dark, chaotic energy gathered around the headpiece of his staff.

Sweat trickled down Dash's face. "Hurry! There's not much time!"

Derring-Do looked up at her. Her voice was soft. "All this time, you've been holding me up... and I've just been holding you back."

"What!?"

"Please, Dash... find my sister. You have to tell her--"

"You'll tell her yourself!"

"I'll be fine, Dash. Really." Derring-Do smiled up at her. "I've always wanted to fly again."

Derring-Do's foreleg went limp. Rainbow Dash watched her tumble through the air... there was no thrashing or screaming. The sheer force of wind stretched her wings open, like the instinctive reflex of a newborn pegasus being lifted into the air, but her feathers failed to catch the air.

Before she even knew what she was doing Rainbow Dash braced her hind legs against the underside of the platform and kicked against it, hurtling herself straight down. She tucked her wings close and dove like a peregrine falcon. She could hear herself screaming, furiously, but the sound of her voice was distant and detached. The distance between them closed, and they fell into the thick white clouds together. Dash saw the faint silhouette of Derring's body directly ahead of her, haunting and hazy. She could see her tousled grey hair whipping in the wind. Her eyes were closed.

She reached out for her, bracing for impact, but collided with a puff of moisture instead. She burst from the underside of the cloud and scanned the ground below: a bleak, glacial wasteland as far as the eye could see. She darted back and forth, searching for the slightest sign of motion. She flew in a wide circle and searched the ground below, but the heavy snow obscured all.

"Derring?" she said. Her voice was warbled and twisted. She cupped her hooves around her mouth and raised her voice. "Derring-Do! Can you hear me!"

She hovered in place, perfectly still, and listened to the hushed whistle of the wind. There was nothing left to see.

Rainbow Dash streaked up at a breakneck pace, her throat raw and bloody from screaming. She burst out of the top of the cloud and rippled the air with a disc of shattered sound, and arced towards the side of the airborne temple: even at this distance, her eagle's eyes caught the high priest without error. She streaked towards him, a living missile, unthinking of the hard stone obstacle behind him.

"You!!" she roared.

The high priest took a single step backwards and moved a nearby switch: a grid of heavy bronze bars slid down between them, and Dash slammed against the metal with a deafening clang. She leaped to her feet and rammed the bars repeatedly, kicking her hind legs against them with the weight and strength of her entire body. The bars yielded not, and she collapsed against them.

The priest watched her, patiently, as she gasped for breath.

"Thus died Derring-Do."

Rainbow Dash snapped her head up and looked at him: her rich, purple eyes flashed with volcanic fury. "How could anypony do such a thing!?" she yelled. "You don't even know what you've done, do you!? You don't even care!"

"The caged bird sings with a fearful trill," he said, "of things unknown but longed for still. And his tune is heard on the distant hill, for the caged bird sings... of freedom."

"You shut your mouth!"

"You have my condolences... truly. But comfort yourself with the knowledge that your friend's sacrifice was not in vain: she allowed herself to die so that you might live, and—because I lack the prowess to end you here and now—I have no choice but to let you escape. But I do hope the knowledge that you were responsible for her death will keep you warm and cozy at night, throughout the rest of your living days."

Rainbow Dash stood up and braced herself, despite the burning pain in her muscles... but a chill ran through her as she saw movement behind the high priest: a trickle of fine sand falling from between the blocks in the ceiling, glittering like gold dust in the light of day. Her eyes opened wide and she took a step backwards.

"That's more like it," he said. "Much as I would love to sit and chat, I have a professor to kill... we can't allow Miss Walski to waltz off with the prize, can we?"

Dash watched the pile of sand gathering on the floor behind him, and saw strips of cloth slithering out of it. "Look behind you! There's—"

He frowned at her. "You don't honestly expect me to fall prey to such a primitive ruse, do you? Please give me some credit, at least."

"This isn't a trick, you dweeb!" Dash pressed up against the bar, frantically. "You're gonna want to open the door real soon now, I swear!"

He let out a derisive snort. "Do give my regards to your beloved princess. We'll be visiting her—and her sister—very soon."

He pulled a lever and a thick stone slab slid down in front of the bronze bars. Just before it closed off completely, Dash saw a set of dainty, feminine hooves approaching the high priest from behind. She stumbled away from the door and spread her wings. She flinched as a shrill, terrified scream came from behind her, barely audible through the heavy stone door.

This has to stop.

She took to the air and flew up high.

Professor Walski scowled at the engine of eternity through her dark goggles, adjusting the levers one at a time. The prism was still suffused with light, but far less brightly than before. The pulsing was slower: less like a heartbeat, and more like the breath of a slumbering pony.

"Princess walski!"

She spun around to look at the robed underling. "What is it now!?"

He bowed his head. "Our agents report that the primary etherium chamber is still at near-full capacity, and the release valve is open."

"Then why isn't the engine working!?" she snapped. "The machine is calibrated, the prism is positioned, and the energy beam is flowing into the core at full strength. There must be a problem with the valves! Look again!"

"We have searched the chambers three times already," he said, "but found no sign of damage or malfunction. Are you sure the engine is—"

"Yes, I'm certain! The engine is my problem to worry about!" She turned back to the prism. "What about the secondary etherium chambers? What condition are they in?"

"Most of them are functional," he said.

She turned back to him. "Most of them?" she said. "What about the rest?"

"Forgive us, princess, but many of Zweibrücker's guards fled into the lower chambers. Their attempts to recapture the temple have made things... difficult."

Perez let out a strangled cry. "Clear them out, and check the secondary chambers! Do whatever it takes!"

"Yes, my princ—"

"Just go!" she snapped. "And somepony find the high priest! He was supposed to be back here ten minutes ago!"

The underling gave her a brief little bow and sprinted to the nearest exit.

"What an idiot I am," she muttered to herself. "This machine takes forever to make a single drop of elixir, and I wasted it on Zeibrucker! I should have just shoved him off a ledge or something."

She threw a switch and watched as the intense beam of light struck a facet of the prism and reflected onto one of several mirrors build into the gyroscopic rings. The beam shone as before, but the prism's glow remained soft.

She lowered her goggles, scrunched her eyes shut and tapped her hoof against the bridge of her nose. I can figure this out. It's only a matter of—

She heard something clatter behind her, like a discarded stone. She looked around the room for several seconds: a few of her guards continued to stand watch by the doors, and a few others patrolled around the platform. Nothing was out of place.

She turned back the the engine. A moment later, she heard a faint rustle. She looked up just as a silver spear fell to the floor with a clatter. The guard was nowhere to be seen.

Perez pursed her lips. "Hm. Probably nothing," she said as she turned back to the engine.

She spun around, quick as lightning, and fired a crossbow pistol across the room just as a rainbow-colored trail zipped behind a stone pillar. There were several thumps and a strangled yelp: a pair of guards flew out from behind the pillar and landed on the ground, unconscious. She glanced left and right, and saw no other guards left standing.

She re-drew the steel cable of her crossbow pistol and squinted at the far wall. "I know you're there, Miss Dash. There's no sense in drawing this out any further."

Rainbow Dash pressed her back against the stone column. A tiny drip of blood dripped onto the side of her head, and she looked up in shock: there was a nick in her ear. She looked to the side and saw the crossbow bolt stuck in the wall. It had pierced through three inches of solid stone.

"You're pretty good with that thing, aren't you?"

"A crack shot," Perez called back, "even at six hundred yards. You're fast, I'll give you that, but I doubt even you can out-fly an arrow. Not from a standing start, at least."

"You wanna find out for sure?"

Dash heard a light, wooden thump beside her, and a hissing sparkle lit up the floor. She glanced down at a bright red rod with a cord sticking out of it. She dove out from behind the pillar and streaked towards the next nearest obstacle. A whistle slipped past her, and something shaved a few hairs off her mane. She landed behind a section of broken wall just as a stick of dynamite landed on the floor: she flew past it and skidded to a halt on the floor. She looked left and right, frantically, but there was no cover on this side of the room. Nowhere to hide.

"Are you quite finished, miss Dash?"

She looked up at Perez, pistol at the ready.

Dash stood up, cautiously, and stroked the back of her hoof against her mouth. "She's dead because of you. You know that, right?"

Perez sighed. "I tried sending you back home without a fuss. But you just couldn't keep your nose out of somepony else's business, could you? This is the real world, little filly: you can't expect to get all your marbles back at the end."

"You could have stopped this from the very beginning!" Dash shouted. "She'd still be alive if it weren't for you! Do you think her family will be satisfied with that answer!?"

"Don't talk to me about loss!" Perez shouted. "I had a son once, do you hear me!? You don't know what it's like to bring life into this world! You can't imagine the pain! No mother should have to outlive their child!"

Robed guards began filing into the room, spears at the ready. Dash's eyes darted left and right as they surrounded her completely. "I'm sorry, Perez... I didn't know."

"You didn't know!" Perez shouted. "Never again, I swore! Never again! The princesses live forever, don't they? They were born with eternal life given to them on a silver platter, but I've earned this! I've worked long and hard for this!" Perez pointed at the heart of the engine. "And with the stars as my witness, nopony in equestria will take it from me!"

Something whipped through the air—a faint grey blur that flitted too quickly for the eye to follow—and there was an explosion of raw, untempered light. Everypony spun to look, awestruck, as an undirected beam of energy streamed up from the base of the engine and bored a hole through the ceiling.

"The prism!" Perez shouted. "Where is it? Where!?"

"...Take a wild guess."

Everypony looked up at open balcony to the ring of stone columns that supported the domed ceiling. Looming above them, against the backdrop of cloudy skies, was Daring Do: hanging onto the side of a pillar with one hoof and proudly holding up the prism with the other.

Rainbow Dash gasped. "You're alive!"

"Daring Do!" shouted Perez. "How many times do I have to kill you, mare!?"

"Just once oughta do it." Daring tossed the prism to herself and snatched it as it fell, as casually as one would flip a coin. "Seriously... dunno what your problem is."

Perez's face twisted with rage. "Destroy her!"

The robed guards let loose with a volley of heavy javelins. Daring Do kicked off against the column and leaped out of the way, tumbling and somersaulting along. She leaped and ducked and spun, and the gleaming missiles slipped past her harmlessly.

"What are you incompetent fools doing!?" Perez shouted. "Get up there and finish the job!"

Several of the cultists took up the heavy launchers they'd taken from Zweibrücker's troops, and fired a volley of grapple-chains at the base of the balcony. As soon as they attached, the horde began climbing up the chains like a horde of ants. Daring Do snatched up a discarded javelin and swung it down, slicing through the steel links like butter and sending half of her pursuers crashing to the floor below.

The other half swarmed up onto the balcony beside her, and she charged at them without a moment's hesitation: she reared up and pummeled them with a barrage of lightning fast kicks. She fought like a whirlwind, without mercy: grabbing robes, tripping hooves, throwing sand and dirt. They came at her with spears and daggers and she snatched up one of the severed grapple chains, whirling it around like a ball and chain. They scattered before her, slamming into the pillars and tumbling off the balcony. She hurled the end of her chain at a nearby stallion, and the grapple claw clamped tight around his neck and pulled him close: she reared up and threw him over her shoulder, sending him flailing through the air to crash into three other foes.

One of the cultists dropped his spear and staggered backwards. "The death-curse has given her power!" He turned and ran for the exit.

"She knows not fear!" another cried out. "Until the curse claims her, she cannot die!!"

"What is wrong with you incompetent fools!?" Perez shouted. "She's just one mare!"

The cultists cast aside their weapons and scrambled towards the various exits. Daring Do managed to beat a few of them senseless before they could escape, but soon she was the last pony standing.

She glanced around, panting from exhaustion. "Is that all? I guess they don't make cults like they used to."

Perez shouted up at her. "Give me the prism!"

"What, this?" Daring Do said with a smirk. "I'm sure I'll find a use for it. Paperweight, probably. It's a shame I don't have a pair: they'd make great bookends."

Perez pointed her crossbow at her.

"Ut-ut-ut!" Daring held the prism in front of herself. "You wouldn't risk damaging it, would you?"

"You think you can stop me?" Perez snarled. "What do you think this little interruption of yours will accomplish?"

"It's called a distraction," said Rainbow Dash.

Perez whipped around, but Dash slammed a hoof against her head. She staggered back from the blow and her crossbow fell to the floor below the platform.

Dash bounced back and for the slightly. "Whaddya think of that, huh? Where’re your bodyguards now, Perez?"

Perez leapt upright and delivered a left jab to Dash's jaw, instantly following it with a right cross: she'd moved quick as lightning. Dash reeled backwards, both eyes spinning.

Perez tossed her hat aside and assumed the solid stance of a professional boxer. "They were Zweibrücker's bodyguards," she said. "Bloody waste of time and money, if you ask me."

Perez stamped a hoof against Rainbow Dash's ribs and held her firmly in place. Her eyes bulged, and she struggled to push it off.

"What do you say, Daring? Give me the prism, and I'll let your friend live. Sound like a fair trade to you?"

Daring Do adjusted her helmet. "Are you kidding? She's Rainbow Dash. She can take care of herself just fine."

Perez took a second crossbow pistol out of her coat and pointed it between Rainbow Dash's eyes. Her struggling intensified. "This isn't a bluff, miss Do. I swear, I will kill her if nessecary."

Daring Do blew a lock of hair out of her face and rolled her eyes expansively. "What, like you killed me? You don't exactly have an impressive track record with this sort of thing."

"You wouldn't let her die." Perez's voice lowered to a guttural growl. "You wouldn't dare."

"I don't dare, Professor Walski." She hunkered down and smirked at her, eager. "I do!"

She leaped off the balcony with her wings outstretched and flew towards the central platform. Perez gasped in shock and swung her crossbow towards the new threat. Rainbow Dash immediately kicked her leg and knocked her off balance, just in time for Daring toslam into her: the two professors tumbled backwards in a tangle, thrashing frantically for control of the pistol crossbow.

"You impudent little upstart!" Perez scramed. "Do you have any idea what you've done!? I've waited thirty years for this day! You've ruined a lifetime of work!"

"You brought this ruin down on yourself!" shouted Daring. "You don't want to live forever! You don't want immortality! You're just afraid of dying! You already squandered one lifetime on this vain and selfish pursuit: what makes you think you'll do any better with a hundred thousand more!?"

Dash stared in awe as the two ponies shot to their feet, rearing up to slash at each other with their front hooves while the engine of eternity whirled above them. They traded a barrage of lightning quick blows, blocking and weaving like professional boxers. Perez's earth pony build gave her a crushing strength in spite of her age, but Daring Do moved with the quickness of a mongoose. Only a few of Perez's blows got through, but that was enough: Daring's face was soon badly bruised and there was a small bloody split in her lip.

Daring Do ducked down for a deceptive low blow, and Perez lowered down to block the attack... but the blow never came. Daring's right wing darted out like a scorpion’s tail, and the broad edge of it’s joint slammed into Perez's jaw like a sledgehammer. She fell over backwards, clutching at her cheek.

"Boxing with your wing!?" She looked up at her in a daze. "...That's against the rules!"

"Then I guess that makes me a cheater," Daring said. She leaped off the platform and flew towards the balcony. "Kindly move your flank, Miss Dash. We're in a bit of a hurry here."

Dash flew after her, smiling joyfully. "You can fly!? You can fly!"

"Let's not—whoop!" Daring's wing trembled, and she flew off kilter for a short distance. she landed on the balcony with an agonized wince.

Dash landed next to her. "Are you okay?"

"Not really," she said. "I can fly a little but, but it hurts like you wouldn't believe. It doesn't help that I have no idea how to fly."

"You coward!" Perez shouted after them. “Come back here and finish this!”

Daring looked back at the platform and winked at her. "Better luck next time, oldtimer! I'll send you a postcard from Canterlot!"

"Aaaurhg! I have had enough of you!!"

Professor Walski reared up and grabbed hold of a large strut sticking out of the side of the machine. She pulled it with all her strength and part of the engine swung wildly around: the beam of light served sideways and lanced through the air, slicing straight through a massive stone pillar just beside them. They dove out of the way in a panic, and the pillar fell to the floor in pieces. The shorn surfaces were perfectly smooth and glowed cherry red.

Dash and Daring flew through the air, weaving and cavorting as the deadly beam swept towards them. Daring struggled constantly to stay aloft, and whipped her severed grapple-chain against the domed ceiling above: it clamped against the surface tightly and she swung on it hard, building enough momentum to keep her aloft. She somersaulted through the air repeatedly, whipping the chain back and forth as needed. Whenever she drew near to an open patch of sky, the beam cut across her path and sent her into a desperate dive.

Perez continued to haul the engine around, slicing through each of the supporting columns in turn. When the engine finally came full circle, the massive domed roof fell with a deafening crash and sealed the room off like the lid of a pot. With the sun blotted out, the beam of annihilation cast the interior with sharp, jagged shadows. The ceiling crumbled and cracked and an avalanche of razor-sharp stone rain down around them. A huge block fell on the engine itself, shattering the delicate machinery and knocking the array of rings off kilter. The metal components clanged like the pipes of a church organ.

Perez dove out of the way, then looked up at the ruined machine in horror. "No! Noooo!"

Dash streaked for the nearest corridor. "This place is done for! We gotta get outta here!"

Daring Do landed on the floor and sprinted towards the nearest corridor. She glanced back at Perez: the elderly mare was scrambling to reach the controls of the machine, heedless of the avalanche around her. A heavy stone block landed beside her and the impact knocked her to the floor. The stone tilted on it's side and landed on Perez's hind leg: she let out a cry of pain.

"Hurry!" Dash shouted. "We don't have any time to waste!"

Derring started back, slack-jawed, as Perez struggled to free her hoof from under the massive slab. Her eyes were wide with panic.

Derring turned and strolled back towards the machine, dreamily.

Dash grabbed her tail and tried to pull her back "What's wrong with you!? Hurry!"

"No... no!" Derring pulled her tail free and quickened her pace.

"There's nothing we can do!"

Rainbow Dash grabbed her tail in her mouth and dragged her back down the corridor. Derring scraped her hooves against the stone floor frantically, locking eyes with Perez... her bitter rival's lower lip trembled and tears rolled down her cheeks.

"Noooo!"

Derring-Do broke free at last and charged back towards the collapsing chamber, but a heap of stone rubble crashed against the archway and blocked off the entrance. She scrambled to clear the wreckage, moving stones out of the way at a pitiful rate.

"It's over!" said Dash. "If you don't let go, we'll—"

"No!" she shouted. "We... we can't just leave her in there! She's trapped all alone!"

Dash set a hoof on her shoulder. She looked up at her, eyes wide and and wet. They paid no mind as the catacombs quaked and shuddered all around them more violently than ever.

"She... she didn't deserve to..." Derring straightened up and took a deep breath. "You're right. We're not out of the frying pan ourselves, just yet."

They bolted down the corridor together, side by side.

"What happened to the prism?" said Dash. "Was it smashed or something?"

Derring scowled. "I don't know, and I don't care to know."

"Don't you think it belongs in a museum somewhere?"

"I think it belongs at the bottom of the ocean," she said. "All it'd do for us now is weigh us down. Let's focus on getting the heck out of this wretched maze."

Dash nodded. "I don't suppose you still have that map on you?"

She shook her head. "I lost everything when I dropped my saddlebags. I might be able to remember some of it, though. There should be a tee-junction somewhere—"

They skidded to a halt as the corridor came to a dead-end. They stared at the wall for several long seconds. They turned back to look over their shoulders, their motions perfectly synchronized.

"That's it?" muttered Dash. "That's all we get?"

Derring glanced around. "Do you see any switches or levers? Anything at all?"

"Not that I can see." Dash frowned. "This isn't how a book would end. This is a terrible ending!"

"Keep looking. There's got to be some sort of—"

The wall of the dead-end shook, and something lifted it into the ceiling all at once. The blinding light of day washed over them and a silhouette stood in the doorway between them and the setting sun.

"Sain baina uu."

Dash and Derring leaned back slightly, jaws clenched.

"Now that's a dramatic ending," Dash muttered. "Not a happy one, mind you."

The mummified filly stepped closer, still holding the massive stone slab above her head with a single hoof. She turned to one side and revealed a decorative platter resting on her back. There was a breathtaking gold decanter balanced on it: a sealed urn sculpted with artistic pictures and encrusted with a rainbow of massive jewels. There were two slender gold goblets sitting on the platter beside it.

"Tsangaj," she said.

Derring leaned towards to Dash. "Are we still thirsty?" she whispered.

"Uhm..."

Youmgui nodded to them. "Buruu oilgoltschih shig bolloo."

"What's that mean?"

"She says... it was a misunderstanding."

Dash and Derring crept towards her, hesitant. Youmgui took the edge of the platter in her mouth and set it on the floor, then nudged it towards them.

"Whaddya think?" said Dash. "Poison? Acid? Lava?"

Derring stared at the two cups, apprehensively... then shrugged. "Eh. What the heck." She took one of the goblets in her mouth and lifted it up, drinking the contents in a single gulp.

Dash watched her for any sign of spontaneous combustion. "So? How do you feel?"

"Fine," she said. "It was just plain water. Pretty refreshing, too."

There was a faint hiss and Dash turned to look at Derring's cutie mark: the ugly black mark faded away before their eyes.

Derring looked up at Youmgui, smiling hesitantly. "Thank you. I... Bayarlalaa."

Youmgui nodded, graceful and gentle. They walked past her, but Derring's eyes lingered on the golden, jewel encrusted pitcher.

"Hey, d'you think..."

Youmgui nudged the platter towards them again and nodded. Derring took up the decanter and secured it to her back, grinning brightly. "Thanks!"

"Bayartai."

Derring secured her helmet and turned to the open air beyond. They were much closer to the ground now, and there were several mountain peaks in view. She and Dash spread their wings together and leapt to freedom. They wheeled away from the collapsing temple, pausing momentarily to watch the coral-like structure dissolve and collapse. Several plumes of white fire burst out across it's surface, and the heavy bronze gears and pendulums crackled with arcs of purple lightning. Youmgui watched them serenely from the mouth of the corridor. She eventually turned and walked back into the temple, heedless of the destruction.

Rainbow Dash hovered next to Derring-Do. "Do you think we'll ever find out who she really was?"

Derring-Do looked down at the artwork sculpted into the surface of the decanter: the pictures of ponies seemed to recount a story, or perhaps a historic event.

"She was nothing at all," she said. "When the ancient Dzunturans were building the machine, they must have spent a long time trying to get it to work... and I think they tested the elixir on slaves and criminals. They had to be absolutely certain it worked before they gave it to kings and queens."

Dash's eyes widened. "You mean... she was a failed experiement!?"

"No... I think she was the first success. The first pony in the world that was cursed to live forever, and she was a lowly slave."

Dash watched the catacombs slowly sink under the clouds, shaking itself apart. "I'm glad the whole place is gone." She turned to Derring. "What about you? There were probably all sorts of archeological secrets back there. Are you sad to see it all go down the drain like this?"

"It's all the same to me... what's done is done." Derring scrunched her nose and cricked her neck side to side. She looked back over her shoulder, inadvertently striking a dramatic pose. "But that's sure a sight for sore eyes."

Dash turned around and saw the HMS Imbrium looming nearby, with trails of white mist streaming back along its outriggers. As they watched, the midnight blue banners came loose and fluttered down through the air. A series of gold-and-white banners unfurled in their place, all emblazoned with a shining sun. The crewponies they'd met long ago were all leaning out the windows, smiling and waving their hats. Skyworthy himself gave them a brisk salute, then held out a semaphore flag and signaled for them to approach at their leisure.

"You're right about that," said Dash. "Hey! Wanna race me to the—"

Derring let out a yelp of pain and her right wing clenched up. She dropped several yards, and Dash swooped down to support her.

"Whoa, steady there! It's just a few hundred meters to go!"

Derring winced. "I know... I can make it on my own. I'll be fine."

"Yeah... sure." Dash backed away. "I know what it feels like to fly again after a really long time on the ground. It feels good to have the skies all to yourself, with nopony but yourself to rely on."

"Sure it does." Derring bit her lower lip, teary-eyed from the pain. "But d'you think you could help me back anyways? Just this once?"

"What? Really? Well of course!" Dash rushed over and leaned against her weak side, holding her up. "Here... just lean on me a little. We'll be home before you know it!"

They turned their backs on crumbling temple and flew towards the zeppelin, weary and limping. The sunset ahead of them cast the silver airship with a palette of rich autumn colors. As they drew nearer, the joyful cheers of the crewponies drifted towards them.

Part 18: "There was nothing we could do. We just found her the next day, and—"

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Rainbow Dash marched through the front doors of the Canterlot General Hospital and strode across the clean white foyer with an enthusiastic smile. Applejack and Rarity followed to either side of her, jogging to keep up.

"Trust me, you'll like her!" Dash said. "She's like, British and stuff, but you only hear it once in awhile when she's talking about teatime or chimneys. Stuff like that."

Rarity looked around the foyer. "I'm sure she's... quite nice. But are you sure she's—"

"Yes, she's real. No, I'm not crazy. I swear it's like she walked straight out of the books! I'm not even kidding!"

Applejack cleared her throat. "Are you saying she looks like her, or that she... ah..."

"Both!" said Dash. "I know it sounds crazy, but it's totally true! Look, just wait a little longer and you'll see her with your own eyes. You're not gonna believe em, though!"

Rarity pursed her lips. "It does sound rather far fetched, I must admit."

Dash turned to her friends, flying backwards. "Think about all the wild and crazy stuff we've done!"

Applejack shook her head. "It's not that we doubt you, sugarcube. You've been talkin' about this adventure nonstop for the last three days, and we saw the pictures you took of that fancy gold flower vase ya brought back—

"And encrusted with such a fine collection of jewels," Rarity said, dreamily.

—and that was as real and solid as anything gets. But if Daring Do was a real pony all these years, why is this the first we've heard of her?"

"Because she's been sitting behind a desk all these years," said Dash. "This was the first time in her entire life she's done anything exciting!"

"Then what were the books based on?"

Dash dropped to the floor with a sigh. "Okay, I'll admit: the books were kinda-sorta, slightly, just a teeny-little-bit... completely made up. But the character really was based on a real-life archeologist."

Rarity arched an eyebrow. "You do realize that real archeology isn't—"

Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes. "I've heard that a million times in the last few weeks. trust me. But this was something different... it was a real adventure. It's not the sort of thing that happens to normal archeologists at all... but she's not a normal archaeologist anymore! It was like she came alive!"

Dash marched up to the front desk and smiled at the nurse on duty. "Hey! I'm here to visit the pony in room forty-seven!"

The nurse glanced at the passcard Dash was wearing, then scanned a clipboard. "Friend or family?"

"Friend." Dash looked back over her shoulder and grinned at Applejack and Rarity. "Hear that? I'm Derring-Do's friend!"

The nurse looked up at her. "Wait... Daring Do?"

"It's Derring-Do, with a hyphen." Dash turned away and walked towards the east wing, with her friends close behind. "Let's go: I haven't seen her since the Zeppelin dropped us off."

"Wait, miss! There's been a—"

"It's okay, I'll find it myself!" Dash continued walking, and turned to Rarity. "You know her middle name actually is Hyphen? No joke! ‘Derring Hyphen Do’!"

The nurse leaned over the desk and waved at her, but the gesture went unnoticed. The three friends walked down the sterile-white hallway and counted door numbers, their hooves clicking against the clean tiles.

"That's it! Number forty-seven!" Dash rushed over and opened the door wide. "Hey! Guess wh—"

The only pony in the room was a nurse tidying up the bed, tucking fresh sheets and clean pillows into place. She had a cleaning trolley with her, loaded with all the flowers and presents that had until recently been sitting on the bed stand. Dash saw the letter she'd sent, as well as the care package full of snacks and puzzle-toys: both were unopened. Dash looked around the room, but Derring-Do's hat and jacket were nowhere to be seen.

"Where... where's Derring? She's in the bathroom or something, right?"

The nurse looked up from her cleaning. "You weren't told?"

"Told what? Did she already check out?"

"I'm sorry, miss. It happened very suddenly. There was nothing we could do. We just found her the next day, and—"

"Nothing?" Dash stared at her. The smile stayed on her face like an after image. "After all that? After everything that happened?"

The nurse nodded. "She was suffering from all sorts of traumas and injuries. Exposure, hypothermia, dehydration, blood loss, fatigue stress, lingering malaria symptoms, sleep deprivation... none of these are serious by themselves, but all together they—"

"Where is she?"

"I don't really—"

Dash grabbed the nurse by the collar and shook her. "Where is she!? You have to show me! I have to see her with my own eyes!"

The nurse gave her a worried look. She glanced at the two friends behind her, and took a breath. "I'll try and arrange something. Please... come with me."

Rainbow Dash and the nurse walked through the lower deck of the HMS Imbrium and arrived at the door to the officer's lounge: a small but luxuriously furnished room with a bar, a karaoke stage, and a fireplace that roared with magical, illusory flames. Now that the zeppelin was safely docked in Canterlot the crew had gathered here—along with as many friends and family members as they could fit—to recount old stories, sing loud and of-key songs, and tell all the tired old jokes they'd heard a thousand times before. A constant stream of frothing mugs flowed from the bar, all filled with sparkling apple cider. The ponies raised their mugs to the stage and sang along.

Applejack and Rarity stepped in beside Rainbow Dash and all three of them watched the stage: Derring-Do and Skyworthy were standing in front of the microphone and singing energetically. Their voices were strong and resonant, and their smiles were joyful and triumphant.

“For we couldn’t leave her there, you see, to crumble into scale

She’d saved our lives so many times, living through the gale

And the laughing, drunken rats who left her to a sorry grave

They won’t be laughing in another day...

“And you to whom adversity has dealt the final blow

With smiling bullies lying to you everywhere you go

Turn to, and put out all your strength of leg and heart and brain

And like the Mare Ellen Carter, rise again!"

Derring reared up and held her mug aloft, her voice ringing loud enough to dominate the room.

"Rise again, riiiiiise again—though your heart it be broken

Or life about to end!

No matter what you've lost, be it a home, a love, a friend,

Like the Mare Ellen Carter, rise again!"

The crowd all raised their glasses, spilling foam and drink on the tables and floor. Rainbow Dash gave the nurse a sideways scowl.

"We tried to convince her to stay in bed," she said, "but she refused to stay put. During her first night, she just snuck out on her own... the doctors say it was a miracle she was able walk. If she refuses to go back to the hospital, there's just nothing we can do about it."

Dash looked back at Derring-Do. "Hey girls? Why don't we give 'er a while to relax?"

Rarity smiled at her. "I don't see any problem with that. We'll be in Canterlot all day, after all."

Applejack nodded back down the hallway. "You wanna come back to the hotel with us?"

"Yeah. May as well."

They walked down the corridor. Eventually, a smile crept over Dash's face.

"Told you she was real!"

Several hours later, Rainbow Dash returned to the officer's lounge by herself. She peeked in through the door and saw an almost empty room: Derring-Do was the only occupant, sitting by a table amongst a truly prodigious stack of empty mugs. Her helmet was sitting on the table beside her and she was writing something on a postcard.

Dash walked over. "Feeling any better?"

She Looked up at her and smiled. "Much. Except for the throbbing headache, that is... but I earned that one myself. Go on, pull up a chair."

Dash sat down beside her. "So... I brought my friends over to visit you in the hospital. I guess we missed you."

She looked around eagerly. "Really? Are they here now?"

"Nah... I figured you needed some time to yourself. You probably didn't need a bunch of ponies pestering you about—"

"Excuse me?"

They glanced down and saw a pair of little fillies standing by the table. They both had tiny bookbags slung over their backs and one of them was holding up a dented, dog-eared copy of 'Daring Do and the Quest for the Sapphire Stone.'

"Are you weally Dawing Doo?"

Rainbow Dash bit her bottom lip. "Uh, now's probably not—"

Derring rummaged in one of her saddlebags. "Well if I wasn't Daring Do, would I be carrying a one-a-these around?" she set the gold, jewel-encrusted decanter on the table with a heavy thunk, then leaned on the table with a grin.

Both fillies stared up at the treasure, their eyes glittering. "Ooooh!"

"Is that the gwiffin's gobwet!?"

"I dunno... maybe. I bet you could help me find out for sure. What's the griffin's goblet do?"

"It makes storms and stuff! The Gwiffins need it, cause they can't make it rain like pegasusses can!"

Derring tapped the decanter. "This must be something else, then. Each time the moon rises, it fills itself up with cleansing elixir." Derring leaned over them. "I got it from a mummy!"

"Eee!" One of the fillies ran around and hid behind her older sister.

"It's okay. In the end, she turned out to be a friendly mummy."

The sister held out her book. "Would you—"

"Sure!" Derring took the book, opened it to the front cover, and scribbled on it with a fountain pen. "Who should I make it out to?"

"Tiddly Wink—thas' me—and my sister is Lemondrop."

Derring-Do finished scribbling and passed the book back. "There you go. Thanks for visiting me!"

The two fillies scampered out of the room, giggling and laughing.

Dash smirked. "So what's it like having hordes of adoring fans?"

"You should know," she said. "The crewponies wouldn't stop talking about me to their friends, and I guess they told their friends. I've only had a few visitors, really, so I'm hardly what you'd call famous." She gazed at the decanter. "I guess that's gonna change soon... I'm scheduled to show up at royal court tomorrow, to present the artifact to the Princesses as a gift. They expressed an interest in adding it to their private collection."

"The middle of court, huh? That's kind of a big deal, isn't it?"

"I guess."

"So... do you think you'll go back to the university?"

"Not right away. The job pays poorly, but the medical benefits are very generous. I've got a month or two paid leave coming."

The bartender came to their table and started stacking mugs on a tray. "Anything I can get you two? On the house?"

"Three, please," Derring-Do said, "and a basket of curly fries."

He nodded and carried the tray back to the bar.

"Got anything planned after you get out of the hospital?"

Derring stared at the fireplace for a while. "You know, technically I was working for you the whole time. As a private contractor." She wobbled her head side to side. "Two hundred thousand bits for less than a month’s work... not bad. Even after I paying for the Goldfinch we crashed, I'm ahead quite a few grand."

Rainbow Dash leaned against the table. “You were right about the books. About the whole series. You were right all along.”

Derring looked at her, alarmed. “What do you mean?”

“The stories, the adventures, the fake Daring Do, I still like them. They're fun. But to be honest... they’re nothing compared to the genuine experience.”

“Maybe not." Derring leaned back. "But I guess most ponies aren’t lucky enough to lead such exciting lives. When you spend all day sitting behind a desk and writing essays, a book is as close as you’ll ever get... I feel kinda bad for those ponies, you know.”

Dash arched an eyebrow. “You mean the ponies who give up before the ending?”

“No... the ones who give up before the beginning.”

The bartender came over and set a tray on their table, with three small glasses and a big wicker basket of crisp, curly hay-fries. Derring took two of the glasses and slowly poured one out on the floor. She and Dash watched the fireplace for awhile, watching the languid flames and listening to the quiet crackle.

Dash scooted her chair back and stood up. "I better get going. My friends are waiting for me."

"That's cool. Think I could meet them sometime?"

"You'll meet them tomorrow, actually. The princess invited us all to court so we could be there when you present the decanter."

"Oh thank goodness!" Derring rolled her eyes. "I'll actually have somepony to talk to while I'm there. I can't stand making small talk with wealthy, stuffed-shirt nobles."

"Do you need a gown or something? My friend Rarity could—"

"Naah." Derring tugged at the collar of her beaten, worn-out jacket. "I was just gonna go in this."

Dash snickered. "Can't wait to see their faces!"

She turned to go, but Derring waved her back at the last second.

"Yeah?"

Derring-Do lifted her right wing slightly. "The doctors say my disability is completely healed... that miracle medicine you splashed in my face really did work, but the wing muscles were just too weak and atrophied: I exercise them a lot, but I've never used them for actual flying before. I never really tried to fly because the pain was too much. Now, though, I have a whole month of physiotherapy to get them working again... and the university is happy to pick up the bills."

"That's great!" Dash said. "You'll be flying again in no time, I just know it!"

"Well, yeah, but first I need a personal trainer. You know... one who can stick by my side and whip me into shape, no matter how much I whine and complain." Derring gave her a sheepish look. "Do you know any trainers? The best flier there is?"

Rainbow Dash paused to consider. "I could establish a training schedule and a diet plan for you, if you like—I am a registered physiotherapist, after all—but once you have the plan sorted out, you don't really need an expert. The exercises are all very simple. Any pegasus will do, as long as they have a lot of free time and know how to keep your spirits up.”

"Oh. Well, that's... yeah."

"Do you know any other pegasus?"

"Well... one. But it’s been a long time.” Derring smiled, weakly. “Too long."

Rainbow Dash nodded to her one last time, and left the lounge.

Derring-Do stood on the outer balcony of Canterlot's royal palace. The gleaming white-and-gold buildings of the city glowed in the light of a full moon. She tried to ignore the crowd of nobles in the throne room behind her, milling about and discussing matters of great import. She was wearing her jacket and boots, and her helmet was tied to the back of her neck. She looked up at the starry night sky above with a sigh.

"There you are!"

She turned and saw Rainbow Dash, followed by a small crowd of good friends. They were all dressed in magnificent gowns, all completely unique. She smiled, but gasped in awe when she saw not one but three princesses amongst them: Twilight, Celestia, and Luna.

"Your excellencies!" Derring said, bowing deeply.

Rainbow Dash rushed over and hopped in place. "You were awesome back there! The crowd's been talking about you ever since the ceremony! Are you having a good time? It’s not too depressing, is it?"

Derring-Do rushed forward and hugged Rainbow Dash around the neck, tousling her mane. They both laughed uproariously.

“Heeey,” Dash said, “You hugged me!”

"I didn't mean to be a downer. I just needed some air."

"That's quite all right," Twilight said with a smile. "Royal court can be exhausting, even at the best of times. I'm still not used to it myself!"

Princess Luna nodded. "We wanted to thank you directly—not only for the generous gift, but for the great service you've provided us. The existence of the enemy you faced is known only to a precious few... fewer still have laid eyes on them and survived."

"I know it's probably a big secret and all. I promise not to tell anypony about it."

Celestia nodded to her. "Your appearance today will not soon be forgotten amongst the nobility... but my sister and I have agreed that a more tangible reward is also in order."

"Well... I mean, you don't have to. I already have some money saved up, after all."

Twilight stepped forward. "It's not money!" she said. "They want to give you an estate: a plot of land with a mansion, and some land for cultivating crops. It's a villa!"

"It's a small estate," Celestia said, "But more than enough to keep you comfortable. You might want to use the land to cultivate luxury crops of some sort... rare flowers, or a cinnamon plantation, perhaps."

Applejack nodded, enthusiastically. "Raspberries are doing quite well on the open market these days: they're real easy to set up, and take up hardly any space!"

"I'm a landowner!?" Derring-Do stared at them, agog. "But... don't you think this is a bit much? All I did was—"

"We aren't here to recognize what you've done," Luna said, "but what you are. What you've become."

Derring smiled up at the sisters. "Thank you. For... everything."

Celestia nodded to the group of friends. "Why don't you go on and enjoy the rest of the party?"

"Woo!" Pinky Pie reared up and wiggled her front legs. "Time to show this city how it's done! Let's go, girls!"

Derring and Celestia watched the ponies go back into the main throne room, joining the party. Dash paused to wave back at her, then rejoined her friends.

"Hey," she said, "I'm not really good at parties. Do you think... maybe..."

Celestia nodded. "The event is in your honor, but you may retire to your guest chambers whenever you like. You've certainly earned a long rest."

"Not too long, I hope." She lifted her helmet back onto her head. "If there's ever anything I can do for you, don't hesitate to call!"

She smiled, warmly. "Of course."

Derring-Do walked away, towards the stairwell that led of the balcony. Just as she reached the first step, Princess Celestia cleared her throat emphatically.

Derring looked back at them. "Uh... yes?"

Celestia tilted her head slightly and arched one eyebrow.

Derring-Do bit her lower lip and looked away. She undid the strap on her helmet and slowly lifted it up, revealing the clear triangular prism balanced perfectly on the top of her head.

"Yeah... so."

Princess Luna walked towards her and took the prism under her wing. "The jeweled decanter will be put on public display for the cultural enrichment of all ponies... but this treasure is far too dangerous to expose to the world. If all goes as planned, nopony will ever realize the full extent of what you've accomplished."

"Nopony but us, of course," said Celestia, "and we do not easily forget our friends."

"I guess it’s for the best," said Derring. "But what are you gonna do with it?"

"Don't worry Miss Do. It will undergo some research, but only enough to discover how it can best be contained and concealed. By the end of the day, we'll have our top mares working on it."

Derring glanced between them. "Who?"

Celestia pursed her lips and took on an uncharacteristically serious frown.

"Top mares."

~ Two months later ~

Spike climbed up the sliding library ladder and tapped his talon against the row of heavy books sitting on the uppermost shelf. "Let's see, let's see... arcane elemental extracts, arcane equipment maintenance, arcane experimental safety procedures..." He glanced over his shoulder and called out to Twilight Sparkle, who was sitting at her writing desk across the room. "Hey, are you sure it's on this shelf?"

"Quite," she called back. "I saw it last week when I was looking for the index of thaumaturgical theories."

Spike turned back to the shelf and grumbled. "I dunno why you still need me for this... now that you have wings, you can just fly up and reach the upper shelves yourself."

"That's a fallacious argument," she said. "I could have used telekinesis to fetch books and you never complained about that, so why would you complain about this?"

"Yeah, but you..." Spike stopped as his talon came to rest on a large triangular prism sitting between the books. It was covered in a faint layer of dust and cobwebs, but still shone with perfect clarity. He picked it up and brushed it off. It's not made of glass... but it doesn't smell as tasty as a diamond, either. I don’t think it’s a gemstone at all.

He turned back to Twilight and waved the prism in the air. "How long has this been here?"

Twilight looked up, blandly. "A month, maybe. The princess sent it to me."

"It's the first time I've seen it," he said and held it up to the light. "Hey, it makes little rainbows!"

"It's a prism. They all do that."

"What’s it for?"

"Paperweight, I think." Twilight dabbed the tip of her quill in an inkwell. "I thought it was a bookend at first, but there's only one of them. Bookends come in pairs."

"Huh." Spike shrugged and put the prism back between the books. His eyes brightened up when he saw the title sitting next to it. "Aha! Here we go: Arcane Esoteric Evocations, volume three!"

He slid down the ladder and carried it over to the writing desk.

"Thanks Spike!" she said. "That's one of the reasons I keep you around, you know. You never miss anything!"

Spike clasped his hands and rocked back and forth on his toes. "Aw, shucks!"

Bonus Material: Extended Theatrical Ending

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The Death of Daring Do Script (2013, April 21)
Segment: Final and Post-Credit Scenes (Pages 112 to 114)
Genres: Action, Adventure
Air Date: Unreleased in theatres

EXT. JANGALA VALLEY REDWOOD JUNGLE - DAY
Skyworthy and two crewponies from the HMS Imbrium emerge from a cable elevator and walk out into the warm, pungent environment of the jungle. They cross the easy terrain, casually glancing at other crewponies exploring the immediate area in a thorough but leisurely manner: they're all using simple tools to gather evidence and examine the underbrush, but it's clear they haven't found anything yet. Skyworthy sees something up ahead and quickened his pace, and the view turns to watch from behind as he comes to a halt beside Derring-Do.

SKYWORTHY

Anything?

Derring-Do gazes down at the ground, scraping a hoof gently against the thick moss and lichen. She looks up at Skyworthy, eyes half-lidded, and simply shakes her head. Skyworthy nods to her.

SKYWORTHY

It was worth a try, I suppose. It's not like

they have social security numbers or

anything.

Derring-Do gazes up at the massive redwood trees all around.

DERRING-DO

A whole culture... a living time capsule from

ancient times. Gone, just like that. Think of

how much we could've learned from them.

SKYWORTHY

There's still the city to find. Or at least,

what's left of it. Think there's anything left

there?

View closes in on derring-Do's face, and her voice lowers to a whisper.

DERRING-DO

Youmgui Taivan.

SKYWORTHY

Pardon?

DERRING-DO

There's nothing there. Nothing special...

nothing in particular.

Skyworth watches her for a moment, but says nothing. They turn back to the elevator, forlornly, and one of the nameless crewponies runs over to them with a small carrying case.

CREWPONY

We found this, ma'am. We thought you

might know what to make of it.

The crewpony sets the case on the ground between them. view switches to inside the box, looking up as Derring-Do peers inside. She removes a small burlap pouch tied shut with twine and decorated with a small wooden carving of a pegasus in flight.

SKYWORTHY

Is that... a pegasus? I thought the Dzunturan

were all earth ponies. That they'd never

even seen a pegasus in their time.

Derring-Do opens the pouch and peers inside. She inhales slightly, and a forlorn little smile creeps over her face.

DERRING-DO

Coffee seeds... awfully nice of them.

SKYWORTHY

Is that all they left you? A cup of joe?

DERRING-DO

I'm not going to brew these, silly. After all, I

do have a perfectly serviceable plantation I'm

not doing anything with. Be a shame to let it

go to waste.

Skyworthy purses his lips, then arches both eyebrows in acknowledgment of the idea.

SKYWORTHY

Think we're done here?

DERRING-DO

May as well tell the lads to pack up and get

ready to move on.

SKYWORTHY

You know, this is the furthest east any expedition

has ever gone. Everypony thought the whole

continent was one big, empty wasteland... and

you just made one of the biggest discovery ever,

right here.

DERRING-DO

Oh, don't you worry about that. There's still

plenty of--

Derring-Do cuts off and catches sight of something off camera. Slow pan of the surrounding environment, stopping as a tiny shrub rustles slightly: A Dzunturan colt, very young, nimbly darts behind the root of a tree: it's only after he moves that we realize he was standing in plain view all along. Closeup of Derring-Do as she nudges her helmet down and smiles.

DERRING-DO

Still plenty of other letters on the compass.

Derring-Do and Skyworthy return to the cable elevator, and the camera rises above. Skyworthy waves and calls out for the workers to pack up their tools, but his exact words are faded and muted as the view becomes more distant. The camera wheels around and dives between the tree trunks, weaving and maneuvering like a biplane, and finally plunges up through the clouds, giving a breathtaking view of sunlight shining through the upper cloud layers in shafts. An extended orchestral version of Daring Do's theme plays, and the view of the horizon slowly fades to black as the credits begin to roll.

EXT. JANGALA GLACIAL TRAIL - DAY
After the credits finish, the view switches back to the cloudy sky from earlier. The camera view is still flying through the air but the movements are smoother now, much less mechanical. There's no music and the only sound is the faint howling of wind. The view dives down through the clouds and into heavy snow that limits vision to no more than a few dozen meters: it sweeps close to the ground without warning, and glides over the surface of a glacier, covered with wavy, wind-blown snow banks. The arctic wasteland goes on for some distance, and massive monolithic shapes loom to the left and right as we pass. One of the shapes draws near and we see several stone pillars sticking out of the snow like a makeshift graveyard. The camera moves faster, sweeping past a massive bronze pendulum and slipping between the narrow spokes of a giant gear. Camera finally slows down and approaches a small heap of stones half buried in the snow. As we stop, we realize there is no absolutely no wind or turbulence and the snowflakes are hanging in the air with an eerie slowness. A rustle of sand and gravel breaks the silence, and a few of the smaller rocks tumble loose. Bleached-white bones begin levitating out of the rubble, coming together to form a partial skeleton that hangs in the air like a clumsily-controlled marionette. There are absolutely no effects, and nothing to suggest a magic spell. Tattered cloth and lace forms around it's body, taking on the shape of a rugged mountaineer's coat. Everything about it seems rail and fragile: some of the bones break free and fall to the ground with a hollow clatter, and the jawbone in particular comes loose on one side and swings a bit. The figure finishes moving, centered in view, and the shadowy sockets of it's empty eyes stare at the camera directly for a few seconds.

PEREZ

Derring!!

The figure throws its head back and screams like a banshee, mad with anguish and fury. She surges up and out of the snow, and her lower body is actually the skeleton of a massive anaconda. She bares a set of long fangs and darts at the camera, as if swallowing it whole, and the sound of her ragged, sobbing voice lingers on.FADE OUT:

THE END

Bonus Material: Research, References and Rambling

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Dash and Do

My greatest concern for this story, by far, was that the original story (“Biased and Incomplete”) really didn’t require a sequel. I liked the ending, and knew that a continuation of any sort would ruin the bitter and poignant mood. My usual pre-reader--whom I trust explicitly to tell me the truth no matter what, and give me the advice I need instead of the advice I want--couldn’t stand the story, and had to force himself to get through the first chapter. He later pointed out that some of the most memorable and satisfying villains in season one of MLP:FIM never got concrete conclusions: Gilda and Trixie, in particular, storm off in a big huff and are never seen again. This gives us the impression that they’re still somewhere out there, even now refusing to change their ways.

Thinking back on it, I never realized how much I appreciated those endings. It’s a sad truth that sometimes, bad people will refuse to change: this is a sharp contrast from most sappy cartoons, where the bad guys always hug and cry at the end and immediately realize the error of their ways. This can be done well, of course, and I can tolerate it once in awhile, but it takes away much of the emotional sting: Villains are almost always the most interesting characters, and I like it when their defeat generates a touch of loss and regret instead of unconditional joy. King Sombra, unlike Queen Chrysalis, has no sympathetic qualities whatsoever: He’s not a villain, or even an interesting character. he’s a monster of the week and nothing more. I was initially eager to see how they’d handle the return of Discord and Trixie because those were some of my favorite villains, but their reappearances got very mixed responses from me. Trixie’s second episode is one of my least favorite of all, whereas the Return of Discord is one of my favorites.

So where does this sequel lie? Is it a dramatic and gripping look into the life of a bitter pony, forced by circumstance to rise above her inner flaws? Or is it a sappy-happy, action-oriented romp with little or no depth, designed only to strip away the flaws that made a character interesting? Will the readers who liked the poignant and somber twist of the original story appreciate all the action and adventure that was packed into this one? I still have no idea. But I do know that I wouldn’t have written this story if I hadn’t truly felt there was more to tell: this wasn’t a story about Derring-Do alone, but of her friendship with Rainbow Dash. I tried to make Derring-Do’s transformation organic and believable, and I tried to give both her and Rainbow Dash opportunities to learn and grow. Whereas the first story is all about Rainbow Dash being unwittingly thrust into Derring-Do’s academic and down-to-earth reality, this sequel is the inverse: Derring-Do must survive a routine, hum-drum day-in-the-life-of a legendary hero who routinely spends her weekends saving kingdoms and defeating nightmarish threats. Neither of them have a clue about how to act, but they survive and endure because they have each other to depend on.

Thanks for your time. I hope you’ve enjoyed reading this story as much as I’ve enjoyed writing it.

The Lost Tribe

Much of the Dzunturan’s culture and language was drawn from Mongolia, and their primitive appearance and nomadic behavior was strongly inspired by the Sherpa people: an ethnic group native to the mountains of Nepal, in the highest reaches of the Himalayas. Like their real-life counterparts, the Dzunturan are a hardy and rugged race whose simple lifestyle has somehow survived through the ages. It’s stated during the story that the Dzunturan are the original genetic root from which all modern pony breeds originated: earth ponies, unicorns, pegasus, and crystal ponies all evolved from their stock (except for Sea Ponies, who are older still... but that’s another story). Referring to them as primitive and oversized earth ponies is a mistake. They’re fifty-percent larger than our protagonists because they aren’t ponies at all: they’re horses.

Their primary strengths are their simplicity of life and their strength of will. Their voluntary exile from the City of Wonders is the only thing that protects them from the terrible curse that later claimed their selfish and power-hungry kin. Although they are more than capable of constructing mighty cities and inventing wondrous artifacts, they choose instead to live in primitive simplicity. They aren’t much impressed by the outside world’s obsession with material wealth and power. When Derring-Do laments that they had much to learn from them, she was right: the Dzunturan refuse to reveal themselves because they are still waiting for modern ponies to achieve a higher level of enlightenment. With the aid of the princesses, though, they’ll catch up eventually.

The Language

Whenever the Dzunturan speak in their native language, they’re actually speaking in Mongolian... though to be perfectly honest, I probably butchered the grammar and pronunciation. If you ever wonder why the Dzunturans speak only in short, succinct sentences, it’s because I didn’t want to push my luck with the translation. Their succinct and straightforward personalities was a very desirable side effect of this limitation.

The name “Dzunturan” itself was drawn from “Dzungaria”: a real-world geographical region in northwest China. The real-world name “Dzungaria” is itself a corruption of the Mongolian term "Züün Gar" or "Jüün Gar", depending on the dialect used: “Züün/Jüün” means “left”, and “Gar” means “hand. By replacing “Gar” with "Turu'un" (the Mongolian word for “Hoof”) we get "Jüün Turu'un", which translates literally as “Left Hoof.” By artificially corrupting this, we’re left with the name most commonly used to refer to the lost tribe throughout the story: “Dzunturan”. Youmgui Taivan, the Mummified filly, even hints at this directly by correcting Rainbow Dash’s pronunciation. On a few rare occasions, the fictional Dzunturan’s language is referred to in the story as “Aduu”. This is the Mongolian word for “Horse”. As far as the Dzunturan are concerned, they’re simply “talking in horse”.

I did take a lot of liberties with the observations Derring-Do makes about the language, primarily to make things more mysterious. In particular, I emphasized the notion that certain Aduu words have different meanings depending on the circumstances. Professor walski accuses Derring-Do of confusing the words for “curse” and “destiny,” claiming that Aduu uses the same word for both meanings, but she fails to realize that destiny is a kind of curse. In this case, there’s a reason the Dzunturan word is never actually stated in the story: I made it up for the sake of storytelling.

In many cases, though, I was able to find exactly the sort of vague and ominous definitions I needed to drive the story. Chief among them is the word “Yegüdel”, which Youmgui uses while threatening the protagonists. Derring-Do correctly identifies this as the word for death and destruction, but fails to realize that the definition also includes the concepts of instability, migration and change. This single word sets the tone for the entire story: Derring-Do’s curse forces her to change herself for the better, or live the rest of her life in unchanging stasis... a fate worse than death.

Of course, that’s not the only translation error Derring-Do makes... when she asks the tribe if they have her saddlebags, she’s actually asking if they have her “sack of garbage.” Sometimes there’s a reason Dzunturan give her slow, awkward looks.

Miscellaneous Character Notes

I always make an effort to come up with creative names for characters and locations in the ponyverse, but it can be hard to come up with clever puns and references at the drop of a hat. The mountain range that Derring-Do and rainbow Dash visit, for example, is referred to as the Kathiawari mountain range: a direct reference to the indian horse breed. This has absolutely nothing to do with the rest of the story, and I regret that I never figured out a punny name for the Himalayas (Hi-mare-layas...? Nahh. Too easy). Derring-Do also mentions that her last visit to a real archeology site was “[her] trip to the Angono Petroglyphs, in the Fillyppine Isles." It’s an actual dig site in the real world... but I came up with “Fillyppine Isles” all by myself.

Derring-Do, the original character, turns out to be nothing at all like the Daring Do of the fiction-within-a-fiction. The entire inspiration for her was derived from my frustration at the improper spelling the show used for her name: the original phrase is “Derring-Do”, with a hyphen. I finally swallowed my frustration and decided it wasn’t worth getting angry over... it’s just a story, after all. This little seed ultimately grew into the entire plot for “Biased and Incomplete”: you can be happy, or you can be right. The obvious resemblance of Daring Do’s last name to that of a certain wall-eyed mailpony was the shiny red cherry on top, and gave me a tragic twist ending that nearly didn’t make it into the story at all.

Zweibrücker’s name is much more straightforward: he’s named after a German breed of warmblood horse. I always try to give my original characters appropriate names, and often spend hours combing through lists of horse breeds and riding terms. This one fit the bill perfectly: big, imposing, and a pitch-black coat, mane and tail. His German name is an obvious allusion to the Nazi soldiers encountered during the Indiana Jones movies, and his giddy, overzealous attitude are a direct reference to Major Arnold Ernst Toht: the Gestapo inquisitor in Raiders of the Lost Ark. I knew from the beginning that he’d die after drinking the wrong elixir, but the original plot had him swallowing Alkahest: the universal solvent that destroys anything (I would have loved to mirror the horrifyingly melty death Toht suffers for peeking into the Ark) but then I realized that being transmuted into gold--the definitive element of greed--would be way more ironic, considering his financial control over Perez. It also helps that when you mention the Philosopher’s stone, most people don’t immediately think of universal solvent: they think of shiny, glittery gold. And besides: if she had tried to poison him with Alkahest... what the heck would she keep it in?

The origins of Professor Perez Walski’s name are much more subtle: It’s a play on the Przewalski’s horse, the last breed of wild horse that naturally existed on real-life earth. As the savvy reader will already have noticed, this is a very early hint about Perez’s distant blood relation to the ancient Dzunturan race. Horses have become such a domesticated species over the millennia that they no longer exist in the wild in any great number: this reflects the forlorn and lonely presence I wanted Professor Walski to bring to the story, and makes her more sympathetic as the true adversary of the story. In real life the Przewalski’s horse went extinct, but was later successfully reintroduced into the wild. Perez’s lifelong quest for renewal was not so successful. In the original story, she was supposed to be slain just offscreen by the Mummified Filly: It didn’t take long for me to realize that she was a much more interesting antagonist than Zweibrücker would ever be, and so the unnamed cult leader suffered her fate instead.

The Stone

The Philosophers stone, or Lapis Philosophorum, is the primary MacGuffin for the story. It’s appeared in works of fiction more times than I can list, but my depiction of its legendary properties was largely unexaggerated (although in real-life legends, the stone is an ingredient itself, rather than a lense or focus). It was believed to be they key to transmuting base metals into gold and silver, and later said to be a miraculous elixir of healing and immortality. It’s inextricably linked to the legends of a Universal Solvent: an acid that could dissolve anything, including gold. The problem--of course--is that once you make the universal solvent, what do you keep it in?

The Philosopher’s stone was never realized, and there were so many conflicting legends that an exact definition becomes confusing. The material used to transmute metals is “The Philosopher’s Stone,” while the universal medicine and solvent were sometimes referred to as “Azoth” and “Alkahest,” respectively. Some alchemists believed that two or more of these elements were actually the same substance, and I decided to combine all of these properties into a single item. Turning the stone into a prism that could be used repeatedly--instead of an ingredient that’s consumed as it’s used--upped the ante significantly enough that it might cause an entire civilization to collapse. Going by the original legends, the Lapis Philosophorum is actually the drop of elixir that the prism created.

The Songs

I was going to add a list of music I used to get in the proper mood while writing each chapter, but then I realized it would be one step up from rambling on about what I had for breakfast today. However, there are two real-life songs that actually get sung during the story, both by Derring-Do: I like the idea that she has a jaunty, heartfelt baritone lurking inside of her, just waiting for the opportunity to cut loose. And given that song and dance numbers are a staple element of the original cartoon show, I may as well lend them some credence here.

The Blackfly Song, which Derring-Do sings after their first night camping out in the jungle, reminds me of the time I spent living way up north in the frozen Canadian wastes. People, we’re talking “mouth of the Mackenzie River” north. When americans joke that Canada is all polar bears and igloos, this is what they’re talking about. People rely on skidoos and dogsleds unironically, a liter of milk costs six dollars and has to be flown in by plane, and they only have two kinds of weather: snow and mosquitoes. I spent my childhood there and I miss it now and then, but if I never hear another faint buzzing sound as long as I live it’ll be far too soon.

The Mary Ellen Carter (or the latin “Mar-ay”, as Derring-Do sings) is a much less obscure song written and sung by the incomparable Stan Rogers, well known for his maritime folk songs. It’s a spirited and triumphant ballad about repairing and rescuing a sunken ship, and its uplifting lyrics are so inspiring that it’s been credited with saving the life of at least one shipwrecked sailor adrift at sea. It encapsulates Derring-Do’s attitude perfectly by the end of the story, and it has to be heard to be believed. It’s also a song from the Canadian Maritime reigon, and I currently live in New Brunswick where my father’s family roots originated. It feels good to come full circle.

It never made it in, but Susumu Hirasawa’s “Rotation” supplied me with all the theme and mood I could ask for when describing the fallen City of Wonders, and the glory and majesty that was and could have been. If this story really was a movie, this song would play while the credits were rolling. Followed shortly by Placebo’s Bitter End.

And Derring-Do’s theme would defenitely be Gary Jule’s Mad World.

I ate at McDonalds this morning. McBistro mushroom melt. Don’t look at me like that!

A Final Note

I hate author’s notes.

I normally wouldn’t reveal all these secret plots and plans, since it takes away some of the wonder of the story and reduces my desire for a sequel, but in this case I thought the references were too vague for most readers to otherwise enjoy. (I took a perverse pride in the fact that a Google search for the phrase “Sorañxa Batgana” produced nothing but a link to chapter eleven of this very story, mere hours after it was published... though later search links do hint at the language used. It's mongolian for “Rainbow Tiny-Irritating-Insect.”). I hope you found these references somewhat interesting. For those of you who figured some of this out without having to be told, you have my permission to feel smug.

As for devaluing the story’s need for a sequel, I’d certainly love to write another Derring-Do story. I’d also like a cake. I have a whole horde of story ideas in my head these days, and quite a few first drafts that have been collecting dust for almost a year. I know I left this story wide open for a sequel, but I do that with all my stories. To me, an ending is just another beginning. I probably won’t revisit this again... the story was never about idols and mummies and temples and jungles. It was about seizing the day, surviving adversity, and rising from the ashes like a phoenix. In the end, there’s only one lesson to learn here: Either get busy living, or get busy dying.

Smugness, of course, comes at a price. Can you tell me the name of the elderly wise-witch?

Some References

Language and Translation References:

http://www.freelang.net/online/mongolian.php?lg=gb

http://wikitravel.org/en/Mongolian_phrasebook

http://www.linguamongolia.com/index.html

Cultural and Geographic References:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mongolia

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dzungaria

Biological References:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Przewalski%27s_horse

Academia References: