> Autonomous Reflection
>  by Crystalline HP
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

> Prologue
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

Canterlot Castle was mind-numbingly still. With the uppermost chambers completely devoid of life at this late hour, there was no general murmur of conversation regarding the everyday issues of Equestria, whether they be apple shortages in Ponyville or the suggestion of inconsequential changes to the official Royal Guard uniform. Only the gentle breeze echoing through every grand corridor fought to defeat this illusion of time coming to a halt.

The noiselessness was sickening; five consecutive nights had been allowed to pass by undisturbed, a totally unacceptable number in his eyes. But as the intruder poked his head around the second most sacred doorway in Equestria, the opportunity to change all that was presented to him on a golden platter.  

Princess Luna stood regally on the modest balcony outside her equally modest chambers. Of course, this was the lifestyle she chose to lead nowadays. Healthy, clean, but humble. Bathed in the moonlight provided by the very orb which she rose to begin the night, she cut an impressive figure against the horizon.

But not for long. 

The princess did not move, the only sign that she was still awake being the occasional swish of her hypnotic mane. Well, that and the cup of tea on the table beside her occasionally floating upwards, supported by her magic so she could silently sip its contents. Luna did not look at the cup while she drank, instead choosing to gaze endlessly into the cloudless sky.

Perfect. She won’t realise a thing until it’s too late.

The moment the mug touched the table again, he made his move. Creeping unnoticed across the room to the balcony proved all too easy thanks to the heavily carpeted floor muffling his mismatched feet. Now mere inches away, he produced a vial of a fine, white solid and reached over, slowly pouring the reagent into the liquid. The entire sample dissolved almost instantly.

His timing couldn’t have been better. Seconds later and the cup rose once more, and the Princess of the Night drank the spiked contents.

Luna gagged and spat so forcefully he wouldn’t be surprised if several of her teeth were now keeping the flower beds company in the palace gardens eighty feet below them. She span around, breathing heavily with a fiery adrenaline that made her pupils blaze even more magnificently than normal. “Who goes there?” Her eyes narrowed. “Show yourself; your Princess commands you!”

But her assailant wasn’t there anymore. Instead he was now sat behind her on the balcony ledge, the spot he’d picked to teleport to at the exact moment Luna had turned around. Just when he estimated her tension to be at its peak, he touched her neck and quickly but softly drew a line across it with a pointed claw.

Luna screamed and whirled around once more, coming face to face with the aggressor…

“BAHAHAHA! Priceless!” Discord almost fell off his perch. “Oh, my dear Luna, you do entertain me so!”

He burst into another fit of laughter upon seeing that he had stunned Luna into a delightful silence. Finally, the realisation that she had been both manipulated into behaving in a very undignified manner and also outright tricked seemed to bring her to some of her senses . She scowled heavily as her breathing slowed. “Discord! What foolishness is this?”

The draconequus vanished and reappeared lying on her perfectly uncreased bed, stretching languidly in a melodramatic manner. “Foolishness?” Discord repeated innocently. “I prefer to call it playful chaos. Besides, is it so hard to believe that I just wanted to talk to my old friend Luna?”

A month had passed since his apparent reformation, the day when he had gained his first friend in Fluttershy. Sticking around in Ponyville had provided light entertainment for a short time, but he had quickly grown to find the combination of his new pegasus companion and the quiet town itself to make for an astoundingly boring lifestyle. Charming Celestia into letting him stay at Canterlot Castle for a while had been easier than he had expected, although he had a hunch that her favourable decision had been influenced by her prediction that a new member of royalty would soon join the ranks.

Unsurprisingly, that prediction had come to pass a week ago. Indeed, Discord had observed the coronation of Princess Twilight Sparkle from the front row of the throne room among honoured guests. How he had endured Prince Blueblood’s dolphin laugh all day without turning him into a tuna sandwich, Discord still wasn’t sure, but at least Celestia had allowed him to design the appearance and persona of the unicorn into whom he transformed, along with inventing his own backstory. Later in the evening he had especially enjoyed eavesdropping on a conversation between two particular mares about him, mainly because he had earlier told one of them he was the menu’s fish course, and the other that he was actually a plumber who had no idea what was going on. His cutie mark had changed randomly throughout the ceremony, although at one point Luna had pulled him up after catching his fake flank depicting Celestia on fire. 

As for his view of the newly appointed Princess herself... To him, at least, not much had changed. The development was interesting at best. To say it was unprecedented would be a lie, but Discord was nevertheless going to ensure he remained quietly updated on Twilight’s life. A minority did not agree with her holding the prestigious title, and this, combined with the likelihood of her making early diplomatic errors due to inexperience, could lead to some chaotic opportunities.

Regardless, what matters right now is that everything is just so much better here; after all, getting on Luna’s royal nerves is a top priority. 

He guessed that his target was now wearing the desired irritated expression, although it was difficult to tell with his eyes closed. “Remove yourself from my chambers,” he heard Luna state above him. “And I don’t recall ‘playful chaos’ being an item present on your list of permitted magical acts.”

Discord groaned loudly and sprang up from the bed. “Have you seen the pathetic scroll your sister calls a list?” With all the gentleness of a pouncing Timberwolf, he dug a claw inside his ear and poked around for a few moments.  A rolled up piece of parchment emerged, which he allowed to unfurl in his hand. All five lines of it. “I mean, you might as well ban me from eating paper! Celestia’s even written the thing in an oversized font just so it looks bigger than it is!” Discord went to stuff it indignantly back into his ear, but then thought better and ate it instead to emphasise his previous point.

He saw Luna’s mouth curl into an amused smile. Then her face returned to the stoic impassiveness practiced daily by royalty. “You should think yourself lucky that my sister and I allow you the freedom to so much as move,” she said firmly. “Never mind poison my beverages.”

“Poison?” Discord mimicked again. He scoffed and waved his lion paw dismissively. “You’re overreacting, dear Princess.” He coughed up the same vial, caught it and shook the last few remaining particles right in front of her face. “Just half a hoof of ascorbic acid.”

“Acid?!” Luna gasped in disbelief. “You… You could have decomposed my mouth!”

Discord tutted loudly and wagged a claw inches from her nose. “Now, now, let’s not get all prejudiced. Why is it that whenever anypony hears the word ‘acid’, they suddenly start squealing like their manes have been drowned in the stuff?” He chuckled at Luna’s suitably confused face.

Now it’s time to break that pathetically thin layer of patience and awaken her rage. Just like old times…

“This lovely powder I added to your drink is actually a very important mineral which everypony needs, unenlightened one. A source of Vitamin C, to be precise. Here, let me show you!”

Discord snapped his eagle talons and chaos ensued.







Princess Luna suddenly wished she had gone back to bed.

As if rejecting her wishful thoughts, the sheets from that same bed flew off and began to weave themselves into a new shape, whilst the mattress hardened to create a sturdy work table. Discord grabbed a nearby banana and used it as a foot pump to raise this new surface to a comfortable height.

Her other belongings were morphing in all sorts of bizarre ways: the teapot she had just been using lost its lid and straightened out into a transparent beaker, a quill minding its own business turned into a spatula, and her prized painting, the beautiful work of art depicting Celestia and herself at peace together, decided to grow legs and scuttled across the room to leap happily onto the recently created worktop, acting as a makeshift tripod.

This is absurd! What is that cretin planning?

The bed sheets finished their transformation. They had crafted themselves into a colourful laboratory coat, which Discord then donned along with a pair of goggles that five seconds ago had been two separate light bulbs. The draconequus curled his lower body upwards to rub all four limbs together. “I just love a bit of midnight science!”

Luna gritted her teeth, but did not let him see. “Stop!” she commanded. “Return my chambers to –”

“Quiet, quiet!” Discord whispered with glee as a zip materialised over her mouth to clamp it shut. “I’m doing stuff.”

Calmly, the Princess vapourised the zip with her magic. “Would you like me to inform my sister of what you have wrought? I am sure Twilight Sparkle and her friends have some time and the Elements of Harmony at their disposal.”

Her power play didn’t work. Discord shrugged, busy pouring water from a bottle all over the floor so he could turn it into a Bunny Burner. “Go ahead. Slaughter me for trying to teach you something useful.” He inhaled deeply before blasting his nostrils over the beaker, resulting in an undignified mess landing within. “So, you just start with a little glucose and hydrogenate it to sorbitol, then…”

Luna’s ears and eyes lost track of Discord’s words and limbs respectively, the latter flailing in a seemingly random manner yet somehow always managing to do what he wanted. Halfway through the bewildering experiment, Discord gained a pair of flip flops, and at one point Luna swore he gave the spatula a name.

A stray thought wondered how the God of Chaos could possibly know so much about such a structured and linear practice.

She shook her head to snap herself out of her reverie. This was neither the time nor the place for such irrelevance, especially when that place was her room disguised as an idiot’s alchemy lab. “Discord, you will halt this nonsense now, lest I—”

“And TA-DA! Ascorbic acid!” Discord played hot potato with a second vial containing the same white powder. He then popped off the lid with his single tooth and threw the contents straight into her face. “See? Completely harmless.”

Luna’s composure began to crack. “Discord.” Traces of the Royal Canterlot Voice crept involuntarily into her speech. “You shall rectify your folly immediately.”

Mumbling something about the potential dangers of scurvy, at last Discord sagged and everything began reluctantly shuffling back to its original position, turning back to normal so slowly it was as though her possessions had developed a grudge against their old forms. The spatula waved at Discord, to which he replied “Oh, goodnight to you too, Lyra!”

Having magically cleaned her face of the acid while this was happening, Luna seized control of the situation the moment her room looked like nopony had ever touched it. “State your intention or leave.” Her voice was still thick with anger. She swallowed and quelled it; if Discord knew he was getting to her, she might as well have painted an enormous red target on her flank.

“So formal, Princess.” He grinned, causing Luna to cringe inwardly. Evidently her growing temper had not escaped him. “You don’t need to be nervous around me. After all, we’re the best of friends now!” He casually flicked her mane, forcing her to hold back from striking him for his outrageous disrespect.

Luna quickly backed away. “Leave, Discord! I must guard the night!”

“Yes, that’s another thing with you and your daytime sibling: working twelve hours a day, every day.” Discord floated outside to the balcony and spread his stubby arms wide. “Take a holiday! Go somewhere...nice.”

The draconequus landed softly and gave Luna a terrible smile. “I heard the moon is nice this time of year.”

Luna’s blood boiled. Her powerful horn sparked with excess energy, every second now a battle to keep herself in check.

I will not let him win, nor will I harm him. I will not let him win, nor will I harm him…

This thought was the single barrier preventing her magic’s dam from bursting and channelling every last bit into Discord’s ugly body. “Get out,” she hissed.

A pause stunted the tension.

“...Oh, alright then.” Discord clicked his talons again and he disappeared.

The Princess blinked. Was that it?

Alas, no. “Hey, heads up!” a voice shouted from the beautiful night sky. Or rather, it had been beautiful, at least until a silhouette of Discord’s talking face had manifested on the moon. Luna cursed his mockery of her very symbol, but knew this was only an illusion; even Discord did not wield the power to teleport at will into space.

His physical form is still in the immediate vicinity... I cannot allow his patronising theatrics to continue!

“Ahhh, it’s brilliant up here!” Discord called, an eerily accurate echo in his voice for one merely pretending to be on the moon. The shadow of his face grew smaller to allow space for a projection of Discord’s entire body, which started quite literally moonwalking. “Join me, Luna! Get your precious sister to send you up here!”

She shook with undiluted rage. Luna could feel it now. The darkness that still lurked inside her.
   
She hadn’t agreed with Celestia. When her sister had uttered the words “Discord” and “free” in the same sentence, Luna had outright refused. The simple thought of him roaming around stirred too many bitter memories. But Celestia had insisted on her consent before acting, suggesting that the mare who had once assisted Luna in practicing modern speech, a pegasus called Fluttershy, might tame him. Deep down she knew that the sun goddess’s reasoning had made sense, but in a way Luna still wanted none of it. She would never trust Discord.

Finally, after spending weeks suffering under the thorny decision of either guaranteeing the continuation of Equestria’s long-standing peace or putting faith in Celestia, Luna had chosen the latter. How could she not? After all that she had done to break her sister’s heart…

My sister, who was given no choice but to banish me for a millennium because of my selfishness and jealousy. My sister, who apologised to me for the thousand years I deservedly spent alone. My sweet, sweet sister...

Discord’s shadow morphed into a silhouette of Luna’s face. “You know, Princess, it’s so good here that I might just stay a little while longer. Let’s say – oh, I don’t know – a thousand years?”

“DISCORD, THOU SHALT FEEL MY WRATH!”   


> Chapter 1 – Royal Purple, Shocking Pink
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

Spike sighed happily after spotting Simultaneous Spell Casting filed under T. His trusty stepladder was the one for this job. Climbing it posed the regular problem of wobbling all over the place, although by now that precariousness had actually become an endearing factor about his work. He stretched carefully at the top, delicately grasped the book between his claws and removed it from its wrong chronology. These were thousands of pages that didn’t even belong in this section; for some reason Twilight had shoved it within Equestrian History.

Now came his favourite part: the Ladder Shuffle. Spike positioned the book under his chin so that the only things keeping the huge text from crashing to the floor were his rounded stomach and the underside of his face. Both hands now grasping the top of the ladder, he leapt sideways again and again with bouts of giddy laughter that threatened to dislodge the book from between his body parts.

He made it to Casting Techniques without incident and savoured replacing the tome correctly under S. Spike jumped straight to the ground and admired his handiwork before sighing happily again.

He loved doing Twilight’s chores.

There was nothing more satisfying than feeling his best friend’s cuddles and hearing her praises after an honest day’s work. He cooked, cleaned, and maintained the library for her. He supported her and he loved her. In return she housed him, mothered him and always found time to spend with him. She supported him and she loved him. Life was good as Princess Twilight’s number one assistant.

Being Rarity’s little Spikey-Wikey helped too, of course.

Spike smiled. “Well, better go wash these dishes,” he said, half to himself, half to the recently dinner-laden plates which Twilight had polished off in record time before hastily complimenting his egg-scrambling skills and forgetting to shut the front door on her way out. Off to Quills & Sofas to buy her weight in feathers again, no doubt.

Old habits certainly died hard with the new alicorn. By now it was common knowledge that Celestia had long been subtly training Twilight for her new role as Princess. Already with such an esteemed reputation throughout Equestria, now bolstered further due to Celestia hoof-picking her for royalty, Twilight could do virtually anything she wanted. Yet the lure of power and influence did not tempt her, as she chose to remain in the same old library in the same old Ponyville, still preferring to devour any book her frighteningly intelligent eyes hadn’t set upon rather than plunge into the role and try to win the population’s heart.

Abnormal thirsts for knowledge aside, Spike liked to think he understood why Twilight insisted on leading a relatively peaceful life here. True, near enough anypony could figure out that her modest demeanour was not the ideal basis upon which a pony could grow into the greatest socialite who had ever lived, but there was more to it than just nerves. Spike was sure that the real reasons for her hesitance of moving forward did not stem from the looming responsibilities of tasks ahead, but rather from a fear of leaving so many things behind. 

Despite hailing from Canterlot, Ponyville was her—no, their true home. The greatest group of friends anypony could ever want had been waiting right here for them, and they were all still blooming from each other’s experiences and friendship. It was simple, and it was fun. It was home.

Now in the kitchen, a dull pang of craving for ice cream prodded at the young dragon’s mind as he filled the sink with water.  Spike ignored it. He had long since learned not to give in to his subconscious so easily; the seemingly harmless action of chomping on an innocent snack might only serve as the first step down an extremely slippery slope, at the bottom of which awaited a destroyed Ponyville. This dark memory was why he never ate without Twilight or at least one of her close friends around anymore.

Ugh… Not that again. I’ve felt guilty enough about kidnapping Rarity to last me even my unfairly long lifetime. She’s forgiven me, anyway. I think. I hope so. Gah! Come on, Spike, something happy, something happy… Uh…

Aha! He and Twilight planned to embark on their monthly stargazing session tomorrow. Despite the fact that he found observing constellations about as fun as what it physically entailed – staring at specks of light for hours at a time through an uncomfortable eyehole – those nights were rare chances for him to show off his smorgasbord of skills in all but a few hours. Namely, preparing sandwiches and cupcakes to bring so Twilight could eat at her leisure; recording notes and sketching lines on a map for her with meticulous accuracy; listening to her essays of background information and making appropriate comments when he wasn’t actually interested; it was hard work, but he would do anything for Twilight.  The sparkling jewel he always received for his efforts didn’t hurt either.

Spike’s attention towards the dishes continued to dwindle, his mind wandering as he deliberated whether the lilac mare would feel more assured if he made a checklist to check that the last checklist’s checks regarding checks on her telescope were all double-checked. Thanks to being lost in this near-unfathomable train of thought, Spike jumped out of his scales when an almighty crash ripped through the library.

He cried out once in surprise, then again when the plate he’d been holding slipped from his grip before finally releasing the loudest one of all after helplessly watching it smash into hundreds of irreparable pieces on the floor. “Oh, for...!”

The kitchen was the only place in the library where no trace of the tree’s rough but natural surface remained, instead being smothered as it was by slippery tiling. A dull, claustrophobic shade of green dominated, which Spike remembered Rarity once describing as “old dragon vomit.” After having a good laugh at the white unicorn’s uncharacteristic crudeness, Twilight had reasoned that the room was otherwise a massive fire hazard. Her caution was well-founded, but it was of little consolation to Spike when the reduced risk of setting things alight was merely substituted for a hugely increased chance of accidentally trashing the place.

Deciding to pass off the noise as Rainbow Dash not looking where she was going during a routine stunt session, Spike mumbled grumpily to himself in his search for a broom. “Been six weeks since I last broke something... Had a record going. Wasn’t even my fault! Stupid rainbow pegasus…”  

“Oh, is Dashie here too?”

A flash of pink and the unmistakable pitch of voice very quickly told Spike the identity of his new visitor, but it didn’t stop him from automatically uttering a fourth yell of fright. He recovered and puffed a relieved sigh before repeatedly poking the face of Equestria’s biggest partygoer. “Geez, Pinkie, don’t scare me like that. What are you doing here?”

Pinkie Pie appeared not to be listening, instead taking more of an interest in the remains of the plate he had dropped. “Were you playing Squish the Dish? I love that game!” Sweeping up a recently washed plate he had left out to dry, Pinkie wasted no time in smashing it over her head.

“Pinkie!” It was a cry of worry before annoyance, something which subconsciously pleased the dragon, but his concern rapidly evaporated after he heard the tell-tale sound of the element she represented. True to form, the unscathed pony was giggling with joy at the mess she’d made. “Pinkie, stop! Now I’ve got even more to sweep up.” He made it to the broom a minute later than planned and snatched it up irritably.

Pinkie’s face fell as she seemed to realise Spike hadn’t been playing Squish the Dish at all. “Oh… I’m sorry, Spike.” Then that trademark, inane smile plastered her face with optimism. “Here, I’ll do it. You go and handle the door.” The earth pony took the broom between her teeth and set about madly sailing from one side of the kitchen to the other, somehow not stepping on any sharp leftovers while also brushing them everywhere in a very random fashion. Her method was unorthodox, to say the least, but this was hardly surprising. Spike decided to leave her to it. 

His previously ignored question about the reason for her visit rose to the dragon’s throat again, but then got stuck. “Hang on. What do you mean, I should go and handle the door? What door?”

“De fwunt wun,” came her broom-afflicted response. Spike blinked twice, leading to Pinkie Pie rolling her eyes and jabbing a hoof in the direction of the library’s main entrance room. “De fwunt wun!” she repeated, as though saying exactly the same thing would bring clarity.

With a shake of the head, Spike jogged out of the kitchen and into the main room where he had been reorganising books earlier. He froze. “Crud.”

In hindsight, it was very obvious that Pinkie had been trying to say “The front one.” Unfortunately, this description was no longer accurate because the door wasn’t actually attached to the wall anymore, currently acting as more of a block of wood lying in the middle of the room rather than an entrance. Spike’s disbelief that Pinkie Pie, even considering her normally inexplicable feats, could blast a door from its hinges unaided was quickly explained by the presence of her Party Cannon erected proudly outside, ten feet from the arching hole in the wall. A cannonball so colourful it was painful to look at rocked casually in a corner.

Confetti draped over every surface imaginable. Books strewn everywhere. Twilight bound to be back soon. This isn’t good…

Spike wanted to march into the kitchen and throttle the pink pony, but every second he spent demanding why she had felt the need to make such an entrance was a second wasted when Twilight would surely disown him if she returned to this disaster. He had just turned and taken the first step back towards the kitchen, intending to grudgingly enlist Pinkie’s help in cleaning, when he stopped dead.

His ears had picked up on a voice he usually loved hearing. It was a voice that filled him with safety and warmth. But he didn’t want to hear it today. Not now. “Spike!” came her call from outside. “I’m home! Why is Pinkie’s big cannon thing out here?”

Spike briefly thought about legging it and leaving Pinkie to quite literally pick up the pieces, but his brain wasn’t cooperating with his limbs. He would never make it anyway.

Twilight Sparkle trotted an upbeat rhythm into the library, the spoils of her trip magically levitating a few hoof lengths ahead of her. She opened her mouth as if to speak again, but nothing managed to come out. Her face twisted in confusion; Spike guessed this was a realisation that she had not encountered a door, something that would have made him laugh under any other circumstances.

Too bad that so much as smirking would be suicide. Oh, Celestia save me, she’s getting that murderous look...!

He actually heard Twilight’s teeth grind. Her breathing became unsteady and a few seconds later, her gaze inevitably fixed on him. She walked with the hooves of a mouse but the aura of a storm towards him, not hesitating to step on fallen books. Her piercing eyes and almost slow-motion approach paralysed him with fear as she loomed over him, rooting him to the spot with two oceans of blazing purple. “T-Twi…I can expl—”

“Where is she?” the alicorn hissed.

Just happy that the first three words out of her mouth had not been, “Get out forever,” Spike regained control of his muscles and pointed nervously in the direction of the kitchen. Twilight walked away without another word.

No sooner was she out of sight when he heard Pinkie greet Twilight as though they had bumped into each other during a leisurely walk. The lilac mare said something Spike couldn’t make out, before Pinkie replied, “I’m helping Spike clean up the mess we made together. It was great fun! Do you wanna—wait! That tickles!”

She was still giggling madly when she floated back into the room with a purple glow surrounding her entire body. After re-entering behind Pinkie, Twilight at least had the decency to set her down gently, a sign which Spike hoped to mean that she wasn’t about to go as insane as the time she forgot to write to Princess Celestia.

Hoping to appease her early, Spike hurried forward and hugged Twilight’s left foreleg. “I missed you.” Her glare did not falter. Spike felt a trickle of sweat roll down his face. “Y’know, I had nothing to do with this. I only dropped a plate because Pinkie’s massive cannon explosion did the rest.” Still no change graced him. “You gotta believe me, Twilight! Uh… Did I say I missed you?"

To his immense surprise, a small smile slowly spread across her face as she returned the hug and shielded him protectively with a wing. “I know you didn’t do this, Spike. You never would.”

She turned back to Pinkie, who appeared to have grown bored of conversation and was now looking dubiously at a book called The Wonders of Pi. “Some ponies really need to learn how to spell,” she quipped.

Any remaining tension in the room deflated as alicorn and dragon laughed together. Twilight’s horn shimmered, taking the book away from an indifferent Pinkie to deposit it on a splintered shelf. “So, what do I owe this pleasure, Pinkie? Any particular reason you've decided to blow apart the library today?"

“Well, duh. I’m throwing a party, silly!”

Twilight frowned. “And it never occurred to you to inform the hosts in advance?”

“Nope!”

The Princess’s left eye twitched. Not wanting to risk his best friend swinging into a scary mood again, Spike quickly took over. “Pinkie, there’s gotta be a reason you cannonballed the front door and loaded that thing with enough confetti to choke an Ursa. What’s the occasion?”

The earth pony beamed at the pair of them. “I have no idea. It was just my Pinkie Sense.”

Twilight looked ready to explode. “Your Pinkie Sense told you to ruin my house?” She howled in frustration and restlessly hoofed at the floor, as if she were about to charge down her friend. “I don’t believe you sometimes!”

“No, my Pinkie Sense only told me to come here,” she answered defensively. “I got three winks of my right eye, then two lots of twitchy tail, and finally an urge to make four dozen chocolate cupcakes topped with extra cream. That obviously means I’ve gotta go see Twilight, and I just assumed it meant that you needed a PARRRRTAY!”

Spike and Twilight exchanged a resigned look. In a tone reminiscent of Rarity trying to stay composed under a mountain of pressure, the alicorn said, “Pinkie, I’m sorry but the last thing on my mind right now is organising a big get together. I’ve just got so much studying on Equestrian politics to do, and—”

“Wait!” Pinkie cried. “I feel another one coming on!” Her right eye twitched spasmodically three times, her tail vibrated madly in two sets of blurred motion and finally she licked her lips thoughtfully. “Mmm…cupcakes.”

Just by glancing at Twilight’s face Spike knew that the same conclusion had hit her simultaneously. “That was exactly the description you just gave us for needing to come to the library,” he said, confused. “But you’re already here!” Twilight hummed in agreement.

“No no no no no, that was when I wanted to make chocolate cupcakes,” Pinkie answered happily. “This time I really wanna bake a huge tray of strawberry ones!”

By this point anypony would have been able to tell that Twilight had reached the end of her variable tether. Spike’s extra receptiveness to her feelings cautioned him to do something fast. “And that means…?”

“I gotta get everypony round at Twilight’s house,” Pinkie breathed, exhaling slowly as if she had just been told the meaning of life. “Fluttershy, Rarity, AJ, Dashie…everypony! It’s really important.”

Twilight raised her eyebrows. “Important?”

“Yup. I got the same Pinkie Sense three days before Discord first broke free, and again on the same day Queen Crys-a-lot crashed your brother’s wedding.”

“Queen Chrysalis…” Twilight mumbled. Then her volatile air vanished to be steadily replaced by reluctant curiosity. “Hmm. I must admit, the fact that you received these premonitions just before major disaster struck, twice for that matter, does give evidence pointing towards this being pretty vital.”

Never thinking that his best friend would sacrifice valuable study time simply to follow the ramblings of a serial nutter, Spike started to wonder how well he knew Twilight after all. “You’re going to put faith in a Pinkie Sense? The last time you did that, you both ended up getting chased by an angry Hydra.”

Twilight chuckled at the memory. “True, but we can’t risk another catastrophe endangering Equestria.” She nodded in self-assurance. “Alright, Pinkie Pie, we’ll trust your instincts one more time.”

Even Pinkie looked surprised. “Okie dokie! I’ll fetch everypony and bring them here.” She waved and sped off at a tremendous velocity, but Twilight was quick enough to create a malleable yet impenetrable barrier right over the destroyed doorway. Pinkie promptly collided with it, leaving her face glued inside the shimmering purple jelly.

“Hold it.” Twilight approached a laughing Pinkie Pie, who had managed to wrench herself free. “Two things: one, we’re going to split the workload. I’ll knock at Rarity’s house and Fluttershy’s cottage to get them, while you go to Sweet Apple Acres for Applejack. As for Rainbow Dash... Well, you know as well as I do she could be anywhere. If you see her, make sure you get her to come here. Got it?”

“Yes sir, ma’am sir!” Pinkie made another break for freedom and smashed into the barrier again. Her friend impatiently dragged her out. “This thing’s spongy!”

“I haven’t told you the other thing yet.” Twilight’s face darkened. “Two, if your Pinkie Sense has informed you wrongly about this forthcoming disaster, my next visit to Sugarcube Corner might involve a Parasprite and cannonballs flying through windows. Am I understood?”

Pinkie saluted. “Roger.” Then she added, “As long as the cannonballs are stuffed with cake icing.” She looked expectantly at Twilight, who sighed and ceased her flow of magic to the archway. The pink earth pony hugged her, patted Spike far too hard on the head and at last succeeded in galloping away at high speed.

Spike couldn’t help a smile as he watched her disappear on the horizon. “Well, you can’t say she doesn’t keep things interesting.”

A similar smile defeated Twilight’s obvious will to remain annoyed at Pinkie. She laughed softly. “You’re right there, Spike. I’m glad she’s our friend.” A small silence followed until the mare rustled his scales. “And I’m glad you’re my friend, too.”

You always say that before you ask me to do some pain-in-the-neck task.

She continued stroking him – which was admittedly very nice – for several seconds. “My very best friend. Which is why I’d appreciate it you’d clear all of this up while I’m out.”

Oh, for Celestia’s sake…

“But Twilight, this is ridiculous! Your magic would make everything a hundred times quicker.” In retaliation to her unfair petting tactics, he gazed at her with puppy eyes and pouted.

With a shake of the head, she trotted to the spot where the entrance had once stood. “No can do, I’m afraid. Fluttershy’s cottage isn’t far, but Rarity’s boutique is quite a trek.”

“Then teleport or fly or something!”

“Spike, if I used teleportation as my only means of travel then I’d probably start putting on weight. I don’t think I get enough exercise as it is, what with my studying and all. And I’m still not all that confident with my wings, but don’t worry; Rainbow Dash practically begged me to start accepting lessons from her soon.” A unique spark flashed in her eyes. “Besides, I don’t want my number one assistant to get rusty now, do I?”

Flattery won’t get you anywhere, your Highness.

“Wait!” As a last ditch attempt, he tried to bring up an actually valid point. “If I tidy all this up now, I won’t have much time to prepare for our stargazing night tomorrow. I like everything to be perfect for you!”

She hesitated, giving Spike a twinge of hope that instantly faded when she said, “I hate to admit it, but I don’t think we’re going to have time for that now. Especially if Pinkie is right about this looming disaster.” As if that were not bad enough, she continued, “Hey, listen. I’ll give my helpful Spike a bright shiny gem if he does this for me. How does that sound?”

Her voice was genuine and her words sincere. That was the problem.

She… She thinks she has to bribe me so I’ll do as she asks? No, Twilight, I take it all back! You don’t have to give me the gem; I’ll do whatever you want!

This entire speech was halfway through being processed from thoughts to spoken sentences when Twilight seemed to take his short muteness as an answer. “I think that shocked expression means yes.”

She giggled, a noise which had mutated into a painful sound to the dragon’s young ears. Sensing a familiar glow spreading throughout his body, Spike realised she was bidding him goodbye with a gentle dose of relaxed magic. “Well, see you later, Spike. Don’t forget to clean the kitchen!” Twilight Sparkle did not depart with quite the same haste as Pinkie Pie before her, but watching her slowly fade out of sight seemed to drag ten times longer.

A pit of sadness welled up inside Spike and his eyes brimmed with tears. Did she really believe she had to resort to bribery to garner his favour? Had he truly been so lax in showing his appreciation for her? When was the last time he had reminded her that he loved her?

Forcing himself to get up and start cleaning took an enormous amount of inner strength. The single driving force behind his renewed efforts was the knowledge that not dealing with this now would only call his loyalty into even further question. He decided it would be easier if he swept the kitchen first; getting smaller tasks out of the way would leave him better mentally equipped to focus on the main room afterwards.

And when Twilight returns to a spotless library with her friends, I’ll tell her how much she means to me. I’ll tell her every day, just like she tells me.

He arrived in the kitchen and fought off another wave of hopelessness as he surveyed the extent of the damage. Pinkie had only made things worse in here. It was as though her aim had been to scatter every shard as far as physically possible from one another.

There were smashed plates littering danger all over the kitchen floor, Twilight thought she needed to bribe him in order to keep his friendship, they probably weren’t going stargazing…and he still couldn’t eat any ice cream. Spike sighed sadly as he picked up the saliva-coated broom.

He hated doing Twilight’s chores.







Another glorious day gave Canterlot the atmosphere that it was competing to be the best city in the world. The cheery disposition of the ponies going about their daily lives was palpable, as though the sun’s rays contained pure happiness which burst upon them shining onto the lucky citizens below.

Princess Celestia thought it a shame that this mood did not likewise pervade the castle. Although the enormous ball of fire that she raised each morning perked up the ponies over whom she ruled, she herself could not muster the disguise of contentedness. Last night she had awoken to hear her sister bellowing in the old voice, and had only arrived just in time to prevent Nightmare Moon’s persona from infecting Luna once again.

She should have known that Discord would fall into old habits before long. Her sister had endlessly attempted to convince Celestia that freeing him of his stone prison would cause nothing but regret sometime in the future; she had been proven correct within the month. Watching Luna become plagued with so much anger and bitterness mere hours ago had been heartbreaking, and frankly very frightening. Celestia counted her blessings that she had been able to pacify her sister’s rage before it had been unleashed upon the whole of Equestria.

The Princess of the Night had refused to come out of her chambers since, crying that she remained unfit to rule and should be locked away for another thousand years. There was no entity, living or otherwise, that would force Celestia to put herself or her sister through that loneliness ever again, but if Discord was still capable and, more worryingly, still actually prepared to test a Princess’s patience for his own amusement, then circumstances could not be allowed to stand. Something had to change.

After relenting in her futile attempts to comfort Luna, Celestia had spent all morning devising a plan of action. This design had rapidly evolved into something far larger than she had ever imagined her mind to be able to summon, combining the resolution of many national concerns and also the bearing of her long-awaited wishes for Equestria’s future.

The notion that just seven hectic days separated the coronation of the mare Celestia had quietly guided for years and – if she deemed to start today – setting so many of her other plans into motion seemed ridiculous, almost laughable, yet there would be no better opportunity than this.

It is essential that nopony discovers my intentions before they come to pass. Not my incompetent advisors. Not my dear sister. Nopony. Even my plans for the new Princess are interwoven, and I thought I would never raise the sun on a day when I could offer Twilight Sparkle the ultimate choice she must now face. This course of action almost seems too good to be true.

But true it was, and there was no reason to delay. Her horn glowed, commanding a quill and a fresh piece of parchment to align in front of her. Carefully considering the wording of her request, Princess Celestia began to write.
  
  



> Chapter 2 – Why, Fluttershy?
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

“So, um… May I preen your wings again?”

“Just the once was fine, thank you.”

“Ok. Or I could gather a choir of robins to sing for you.”

Twilight took a controlled breath. “The parliament of owls hooting before was catchy enough. I don’t need anything else.”

“But, um, are you sure you don’t need help walking? You’ve been—”

“No, Fluttershy!”

Carousel Boutique finally coming into sight felt like a gift greater than the wings she had developed a week ago, her new features which were also the reason why Fluttershy was currently acting like a voluntary slave. Ever since the coronation, the terribly submissive pegasus had treated Twilight with overbearing respect and was suffocating her underneath a mountain of munificent but unnecessary offers.

Twilight would have almost enjoyed this attention if it were not so obviously fuelled by pure obligation. This fact alone was enough to strain their friendship to a lethal breaking point; Fluttershy’s interminable kindness was actually very upsetting to Twilight. Dictated as she was by her anxious mind, this sadness slowly devolved into anger, leading to the alicorn yelling more harshly than she intended to firmly turn Fluttershy down. Then, of course, the pegasus believed that her efforts were inadequate and thus strived to sacrifice more next time.

A vicious cycle of the worst kind. I know what the problem is. So why can’t I bring myself to just ask her to stop?

By the time the boutique was within stone-bucking distance, Twilight had deteriorated into stark depression. Fluttershy, an acutely sensitive mare, didn’t need long to recognise this and jittered nervously beside her. “Oh no, am I doing something wrong? I’m sorry… I’d give you a hug to make it up to you, but touching royalty would be so disrespectful.”

Twilight knew it was a huge mistake to ignore this opportunity to initiate a hug herself and relieve the brittle atmosphere, but that is exactly what she did.  Aware as she was that this harmful decision would only breed more sorrow, Twilight could not overcome the part of her mind which silently relished in the loneliness. Her eyes burned with fluid as she raised a hoof to knock on Rarity’s lavish front door.

“Please, let me get that for you!” Fluttershy bowed, beamed forcibly at her and tapped the polished oak with such gentleness, Twilight doubted that territorial Opal had been disturbed. To her surprise, Rarity’s business voice promised to be with them in a moment and the sound of practiced, rhythmic hooves on her undoubtedly spotless floor echoed through the door.

Whatever she was doing in her requested moment, Rarity seemed to finish it and the door swung open with a graceful flourish. Since every one of her regular customers knew it was absolutely fine to enter without warning during her opening hours, the unicorn was probably expecting a new potential client. “Good afternoon, and welcome to Carousel Boutique, where everything is—oh, it’s you two lovely mares!”

After giving both of them a quick squeeze, Rarity’s more relaxed tone engaged as she explained, “I’m awfully sorry, but I am simply drowning in paperwork and there is a ruby-encrusted dress to which I must attend soon. You’re both very welcome to come in, but I’m afraid I cannot afford to stray into other activity at the moment. Perhaps you could judge my latest designs while I work?”

When the only response she received was a horrified gasp from Fluttershy, one likely born of her unacceptable familiarity towards Twilight, Rarity finally seemed to latch onto the unfortunate aura of her guests. “Is something the matter, my dears? I sense a certain…tension.”

The pause on this occasion was completely silent. An agonising period passed wherein nothing happened, before Twilight spotted Rarity’s deep blue eyes widen in her peripheral vision. Despite seeing her friend close to tears, Rarity managed a genuine smile and gently raised the Princess’s downcast face with a manicured hoof. “My mistake. Ignore everything I just said; I can give up all the time in the world to talk, Twilight.”

The designer’s heartfelt and unforced generosity lifted her spirits slightly, but the serious reason for visiting the boutique in the first place would not budge from the forefront of Twilight’s mind. Although she wanted nothing more than to collapse into Rarity’s sympathetic hooves and cry, time was a pressing factor, and right now none could be spared for therapy.

I promise I’ll work things out with you later, Fluttershy. It’s just about picking the right moment when I know you’ll understand.

Twilight wiped away the stinging sensation in her eyes until she was certain no trace of unhappiness remained. “Thank you, Rarity, but we can’t come in. In fact, we need you to come with us.”

Now it was Rarity’s turn to look hesitant. She bit her lip before responding, “Truly? To where?”

“The library. It’s very urgent.”

“Is it little Spikey-Wikey? Is he pining after a cuddle?” When Twilight shook her head, Rarity began shifting restlessly on the spot. “It’s just, so much stitching to do, you understand? And Sweetie Belle, she sometimes invites her friends, those Crusaders, over here while I’m gone without asking permission.” She laughed nervously. “You know how excitable they all are...”   
 
With a worried backward glance into the boutique cementing the unicorn’s concern of leaving her shop unattended, Twilight could see she was going to need more encouragement. “The fate of Equestria may be at stake.”

Her simple statement had the desired effect. “Oh! In that case, I can hardly refuse, can I?” She giggled lightly. “Please give me a moment. I must inform Sweetie Belle that I’ll be away for a while.” After summoning a crisp piece of paper and a pen that left glittering sapphire dust along the ink lines it traced, Rarity scrawled a quick but damask note before magically gluing it to a wall in plain sight. “She’s napping,” the unicorn explained to her friends’ questioning expressions.

With a smile and audible rejuvenation that reflected her improved mood, Twilight asked, “Are we ready?”

“One more thing, darling.” Rarity quietly focused, her pearly white teeth slightly bared and eyes shut fast in concentration. Her horn sparked once, twice, before an eruption of magic suddenly exploded from its tip and engulfed her entire house. Twilight and Fluttershy were taken aback; usually only very precise matters involving her delicate craft were handled by Rarity’s magic, so seeing her perform such a voluminous spell was as surprising as it was impressive.

Before either of them could ask exactly what she had done, a somewhat dizzy Rarity spoke. “I’ve…been practicing…that one,” she managed between heavy panting. “It protects all of my dresses from minor scratches, burns, stains and such. Goodness, how it tires me…”

Rarity staggered as she drew herself up to her full height, trying to maintain both her balance and distinguished posture. Deciding to leave her friend’s pride intact by not suggesting that she should have cast the spell instead, Twilight congratulated Rarity with a simple wink.

If we return on foot, a certain pegasus is probably going to offer me breathing assistance. No, walking back is out of the question. I guess Spike’s going to see his crush earlier than he expected!

Twilight quickly interlocked hooves with her companions and, before Fluttershy could get over being graced with a princess’s physical contact, she teleported the trio back to the library.

Because of the likelihood that Spike was still busy with his greatest cleaning task to date, Twilight had picked a spot just outside, a small distance from where the front door used to be. Along with the guarantee that they would not materialise right on top of some hazard and cause damage to both themselves and the house, Twilight could also be sure that she would not have to deal with a grouchy dragon grumbling about his hard work being ruined.  

Her caution turned out to be in vain, however, when Rarity toppled over anyway due to her already disoriented senses being thrown off again by the incredibly fast method of travel. “I am so sorry,” the unicorn said shamefully as Twilight helped her up. “I must look like I’m trying to act like an undignified simpleton. Wait… MY MANE! SOMEPONY FIX MY MANE!”

Rarity refused to move until her royal purple curls had been groomed to utter perfection. While Fluttershy attended to this, Twilight rolled her eyes and used the time to survey her home with a keen eye. She did a double take after seeing the door fully repaired and back in place as though it had never been blown off at all; Spike had made better progress than she had anticipated. Pleased and feeling slightly more assured that she was not about to invite her friends into a bomb-site, Twilight stretched her wings and flapped them experimentally.

This still hasn’t sunk in properly yet. I’m a Princess of the country I love! And these wings... They feel so…right. I can’t wait until Rainbow Dash teaches me so I can be at least competent with them.

Of course, with all the benefits of her newfound position came the strings that were unavoidably attached. Fluttershy’s phobia of causing offence aside, a small population of other ponies in Ponyville were now reluctant to initiate conversation with her, likely for the same reason.

Worse, she’d had to endure the day after the coronation, a day filled with nothing but greeting old, probably corrupt members of Celestia’s parliament who gave fake smiles and faker commendations. The sister princesses had kept them in check, naturally, but the occasion had only confirmed Twilight’s fears that not everypony welcomed her into the role. In an extensive conversation and a hushed tone, Luna had warned her of the army of prejudices and bias the politicians sustained – and would quite possibly use – against her, and the list had definitely not been pleasant to the ear.

Nevertheless, Celestia had yet to request her presence back at the castle, at which point she would fill her in on the finer details of royal customs and expectations. Powerful as Twilight’s enemies were, they could do nothing until she actually started making decisions. Even then, it was impossible for them to pounce unless she showed signs of weakness or incompetence, qualities which she intended to stamp out as quickly as possible.

Lost in thought, Twilight barely noticed when Rarity at last declared her mane satisfactory and started towards the library. “Now, tell me about this terror that is endangering Equestria.”

She took a breath to answer, but her mind drew a blank as she realised that nothing was truly wrong. “I don’t know myself. Apparently something is going to happen soon, though.”

“Hm? Has Princess Celestia written to you about a new threat?”

Fluttershy, whom Twilight had honestly forgotten was there, spoke quietly. “Um, Princess Twilight told me everything on the way to your house, Rarity. Her Highness said that Pinkie Pie was the one predicting a disaster.”

Wincing over the horribly formal titles with which Fluttershy was hailing her, Twilight quickly found herself cringing further under Rarity’s dumbstruck gaze. “…I believe I must have misheard. Did Fluttershy say that you trusted Pinkie’s judgement in a matter of such magnitude?”

The alicorn felt her face grow hot. “Well, you see, she had one of her Pinkie senses. I wouldn’t have taken any notice but she’s gone through this one twice before, both times just before Equestria plunged into calamity. Pinkie’s just never told anypony about them until now.” Rarity’s expression only worsened, causing the words to tumble faster out of Twilight’s mouth to end her self-inflicted embarrassment. “I thought this might mean another catastrophe was imminent, so Pinkie Pie’s fetching Applejack and Rainbow while I came to get you two. Do you understand why I wanted to be safe on this? …Please say you understand.”

Judging by the way she’s looking at me as though I just urinated over her entire wardrobe, I don’t think she empathises much.

“W-Why of course, darling!” Rarity responded far too loudly. She cleared her throat, probably trying to retain some dignity after spending the past minute with her mouth hanging open. “Let’s just see how this unfolds, yes?”

Relieved that the white pony had dropped the subject, Twilight arrived at the front door and tentatively pushed it open. Images of Spike trapped underneath a pile of books and collapsed from excessive labour flashed uncontrollably in her mind’s eye as she suddenly shoved the door harder, wanting to get this over with. She peered inside…and gasped.

The library was spotless. Not a shred of litter cluttered the floors, not a stubborn mark stained the walls, and not a single book sat out of place. It was clean in a way that clean did not describe; it was organisation to the extreme; it was perfect.

Twilight’s hooves drummed involuntarily on the spot as she surveyed her dream home, giggling. Before she knew what she was doing, she found herself impersonating Pinkie Pie, with copious amounts of singing accompanying her dance around the room. She didn’t even care that she was likely ruining the gleaming floor; just seeing the house exactly as she had long envisioned it, if only for a few seconds, was enough for her.

“Looks like somepony’s happy,” piped a familiar voice. Twilight stopped bouncing and saw a pony enter the room from the kitchen, a pegasus with a strikingly colourful mane and an attitude to match. “How’s my new flying buddy?” asked Rainbow Dash, taking a large bite out of the muffin she was holding.

Well, what do you know. Looks like Pinkie actually did as I asked!

“Rainbow, you’re here!” Twilight cried in delight, her ever-brightening mood improving further. After going in for a hug, which the pegasus denied in favour of a hoof-bump, Twilight managed to withhold a torrent of complaints when she saw crumbs from the confectionary falling all over the floor.

Speaking of which…

“Say, where did you get that muffin? I didn’t know you could bake.”

“I can’t,” said the carefree pegasus with a chuckle. “But Spike can. By the way, what took you so long? I got here ages ago, slowpokes! This place was still a mess when I arrived!” Polishing off the muffin, Rainbow suddenly appeared sheepish. “I’d say help yourselves to a snack, but that was kinda the last one, so…”

Twilight blinked. “Wait, Spike fixed all this and still had time to make you that thing?”

“Yup, a whole batch of them. You should have seen him go!” Rainbow Dash shot from the floor to fly around the room with incredible agility, racing from corner to corner but never crashing. “He was like the renovator version of the Wonderbolts!”

“What, and you just left him to it?” the alicorn pressed with a deliberate edge.

Slowing down to give Twilight a contagiously relaxed grin, Rainbow spread her front hooves wide. “Hey, don’t get the wrong idea. Obviously I said I’d help, but he just kept chucking muffins my way. What’s a hungry mare supposed to do apart from scoff them?” The pegasus landed and frowned. “Come to think of it, his behaviour was pretty confusing.”

A small niggle of concern poked at Twilight’s stomach. “Where is he now?”

“In Wonderland, probably,” answered Rainbow Dash with a lazy gesture of her hoof. “He’s taking a well-earned nap upstairs.” She reclined into her classic snoozing position, licked her lips and yawned. “I think I’ll have one myself. I hate being disturbed when I’m getting my forty winks.” Her eyes now closed, she said, “Wake me up when Pinkie and AJ get here, yeah?”

Unable to think of a suitable response to Rainbow’s statement and contradictory request, Twilight simply nodded to herself. She turned to the other two ponies in the room, addressing the one who had remained surprisingly silent. “Rarity, could you do me a big favour and keep watch for Pinkie coming back? I don’t want her blasting her way in here again.”

“But of course, Twilight. Applejack and I shall ensure that she behaves.” She stationed herself by the window, taking a mild interest in some of the nearby books.

Her attention switched to Fluttershy. Choosing her words carefully to present the friendliest attitude possible, Twilight made a fresh attempt to loosen the pegasus’s stiff conformity. “And Fluttershy, could you wake Rainbow Dash up when that happens? I know she doesn’t mind you because you’re so gentle and all.”

Looking absolutely ecstatic at being given both a task and a compliment, the shy pegasus bowed. “I swear upon the animals I take care of.”

Twilight had difficulty subduing another wave of frustration. A positive reaction was a start, but Fluttershy’s painfully needless observations of custom around royalty made the alicorn want to lash out at something. Seven days of probing and Twilight hadn’t put so much as a dent in Fluttershy’s armour of forced respect; the lilac mare was extremely worried that they would eventually drift apart, an outcome which could render her new diplomatic position crippled through sheer guilt.

Allowing the pointless anger to simmer until it boiled no more, Twilight resolved herself to try again later. Giving up would only serve to bind her to the unthinkable.   

That’s those two sorted. In the meantime, I’ve got to check up on Spike. If Rainbow Dash’s accounts are anything to go by, it sounds like the little guy seriously tuckered himself out.

Her friends entrusted with their tasks, Twilight ascended the stairs to her room. She breathed a homely sigh at the familiarity, actually glad that it was now the messiest room in the house; an unlikely achievement considering that the rest of the library had fallen victim to Pinkie’s haphazard antics. Change was an event which Twilight was reluctant to embrace unless she understood the exact reasoning behind it and the consequences thereof, the logic which explained why she hoped her room would never suffer alteration at the hands of time or at the hooves of another pony.

Twilight heard him before she saw him: the adorable sound of Spike dreaming away. His signature snores made her want to snuggle him like a teddy bear, something which she often did whenever the ancient fabric of Smarty Pants just couldn’t warm her insides enough. This usually resulted in Spike awakening in a foul mood due to his snooze being prematurely cut short, but resolving this was just a matter of giving him more affection. Twilight loved the irony that one could solve Spike’s disagreeable disposition in the morning by showering him with the very thing that caused the issue in the first place.

Today was one of those days when she couldn’t resist. Although the dark clouds dominating her life a mere ten minutes ago had been somewhat cleared thanks to the strong bonds she shared with Rainbow Dash and Rarity, Twilight needed those cumulonimbus masses to be sent to the other side of the planet by gale force winds if she were to be prepared to face another threat to her country. And for that to happen, she had to have Spike’s support.

The last of Twilight’s doubts about pulling him from his dreams disappeared when she realised that the dragon would have to be roused anyway as soon as Pinkie turned up with Applejack in tow. Confident that she wasn’t being unreasonable, the alicorn ran over to his basket, ripped off the blanket and swept him up in her hooves. She heard Spike mumble something along the lines of “…my sweet white flower…” before he spluttered incomprehensible nonsense, rapidly being dragged out of his fantasy.

She sat and cradled the groggy dragon close to her chest, already prepared to launch into her tried and tested tactics that would bring out his brighter side. At last Spike’s eyelids rose from a pained squint to their fully open state, his emerald pupils adjusting to the invading sunlight. Twilight waited for the inevitable onslaught of moaning and grumpiness, at which point she would cuddle him closely and tell him she needed his help.

The timeline she imagined, however, quickly developed a branch when the only thing that escaped Spike’s mouth was a sigh of contentment. He held his short arms straight out to her face and waved them about. Astonished that she had encountered no resistance whatsoever, Twilight gladly accepted her best friend’s implied request and allowed him to wrap his arms around her neck. “You really are the best assistant I could ever hope to have, Spike,” the alicorn said softly. “How did you manage to clean everything up so perfectly?”

“Ah, it was nothin’,” replied the dragon modestly, shifting to find the most comfortable position against her. “Only because it was for you, Twilight.”

She set him down and rustled his scales, feeling truly cured of the blues. “I need to make this up to you somehow,” she said with a sincere smile.

“No need.” Spike grinned, going into his brilliantly selfless gentleman mode. “Just doing my job.” With a frown signifying his return to normal, he asked, “Why did you go out again? I forgot.”

“We have to get everypony round here, remember? Fluttershy and Rarity got back with me, and now we’re just waiting for—”

“Rarity!” Spike cried. “I gotta say hello and be all smooth and stuff!” After spinning his semi-portable mirror towards himself, the dragon began scrutinising his appearance, flexing his tail and rotating his neck to find the angle his head should be tilted to best compliment his smile. “How do I look?”

Before Twilight had the opportunity to give her biased answer – namely that he couldn’t fail to woo anypony in Equestria with such striking features – Spike’s stomach rumbled loudly. Then it hit her.

I forgot to get Spike a gem! Stupid Twilight… I promised I’d reward him, and he did such a good job, too! What am I going to say?!

Spike apologised on behalf of his body, fretting aloud that he couldn’t possibly greet the mare of his dreams when his belly risked betraying his manners. His verbal anxiety tapered off as he noticed Twilight’s sudden restiveness.

Beaming madly at Spike to buy herself some time went unrewarded, her congested mind refusing to fabricate a single excuse which might appease him. As the pause lengthened, she was still unaware that her expression bore a dangerously close resemblance to that of insanity. “Uh, Twilight?” Spike ventured, tapping her head gently. “Are you in there?”

He doesn’t remember… Thank Celestia for that!

“Absolutely fine, Spike. Dandy, even.” Seriously wanting to escape Spike’s developing combination of crossed arms and disbelieving air squeezing her for the truth, Twilight was relieved when Rarity saved her flank.

“Yoo-hoo, Twilight darling!” came her faint call from below. “Applejack and Pinkie are in sight; they’ll be here any moment!”

Spike’s attention instantly returned to the mirror and how his flattened scales might win the heart of the most beautiful pony in existence. With a giggle, Twilight scooped him up onto her back and trotted briskly downstairs. “Come on, Casanova. Let’s see if Pinkie’s forewarning holds any weight.”

The scene awaiting her was certainly the busiest she had seen the library host for a long time. The previous occasion which had seen this many ponies visit at once had not been a happy one, mainly because her friends had found enjoyment in harassing her and each other with cruelty, greed, deceit and pessimism. The outside world had been foreign and chaotic, and Rainbow Dash, now stretching after being awoken by Fluttershy, had not been present at all; she had abandoned them.

Shaking her head to rid the mind of Discord’s chilling laugh, Twilight hopped the last few steps and hugged Applejack and Pinkie as they came in, her front door remaining thankfully intact. Her heart seeped warmth as she watched all five of her friends greet each other enthusiastically, their wonderfully diverse personalities mixing up how they interacted as they accommodated for each other’s mannerisms.

Chrysalis, Discord, Sombra; they’re all in the past. We conquered those challenges and hardships because our friendship proved to have more conviction than their evil plans. Oh, I’m so proud of you guys...

Twilight almost shed a few drops of liquid pride until Fluttershy gave a loud gasp, turned on the spot and galloped towards her. Skidding to a halt inches from her hooves, Fluttershy entered into a deep bow and addressed the bewildered alicorn. “I’m so sorry, your Highness! I didn’t ask for permission to talk to my friends… Please forgive me! Can I go and speak with Applejack?”

To say Twilight was at a loss would not even begin to describe the unadulterated hopelessness that immediately sank into her. “Fluttershy… I-I can’t…” She raised her head with darting eyes, desperately seeking some measure of support from the others, yet unbelievably none of them had batted an eyelid at the commotion.

With her friends remaining incognizant of her crumbling relationship with Fluttershy and a crowded library being no place to discuss the problem, Twilight was faced with no other choice but to mumble, “Yes, of course you can.”

Enough is enough. This needs sorting out today. When everypony leaves, I’ll ask Fluttershy to stay behind. No indirect cajoling this time; I’ve got to give it to her straight.

Unfortunately, a solid plan for the future was no substitute for the present, and Twilight could feel herself approaching a breakdown as she watched the problematic pegasus try to get involved in an animated debate between Applejack and Rainbow Dash. She looked away and compelled herself to find reason to smile, a decision that was duly rewarded when the most civilised dragon in Equestria unwittingly restored her spirits.

Spike was hogging more than his fair share of Rarity’s time. The unicorn herself looked slightly flustered, likely surprised at the dragon’s suave attitude and subtle compliments. Sure, he was small in stature and a bit chubby, but Twilight knew all too well how Spike could wrap most ponies around his little claw just by moving his jaw and employing a little chivalry. She liked to think that his abilities as a romantic wordsmith were owed in part to her; living in a library with a bookworm was almost certainly a contributing factor. It was a shame that Rarity seemed immune, but Twilight found refuge from her miserable feelings by silently egging him on.

A handful of minutes passed before Rainbow Dash grew predictably impatient and hovered near the ceiling to address the party. “Alright everypony, that’s enough chatter! My epic training got interrupted for this weird reunion, so I want an explanation!”

Applejack nodded in agreement. “This better be mighty important. Ah got a barn full o’ goods to take to market!”

A stone dropped in Twilight’s stomach. The awkward vibes Rarity and Fluttershy were suddenly emitting brought home the fact that neither the rainbow pegasus nor the country earth pony were aware of the very flimsy grounds for which they were all gathered.

The one who had provided those grounds, the candy-obsessed ball of fun called Pinkie Pie, seemed completely oblivious to the thick air currently floating between them. Having failed to explain the whole situation to the pair, it was now up to Twilight to deliver the uncertain news to Applejack and Rainbow Dash.

I swear I’ll get you for this, Pinkie…!

It wasn’t long before she cracked under their accusing glares. “Well, you see, Pinkie Pie just—”

A loud noise interrupted her speech. Large bells rang in her head as her mind recalled it as one related to happiness and excitement, although a bittersweet aftertaste sullied the memory; the alicorn was sure she had been hearing it less and less recently. Twilight turned towards the source, unable to put a hoof on it until recognition set in the moment she saw Spike clutching his belly, a bloated look on his face.

And sure enough, in front of him lay a rolled up piece of parchment that he had just belched up.

Rainbow Dash went to grab it, but Spike recovered and waved her away. “This is my job,” he said firmly. After giving Rarity a sly wink, which was rewarded with a dainty laugh and the unicorn fanning her face, he sliced the ribbon with his claw and unrolled the parchment, clearing his throat to complete the ritual. “Ahem…

"My fellow princess, Twilight Sparkle,

"I hereby summon you to Canterlot Castle to attend a meeting. Please bring the Elements of Harmony and their respective bearers, along with Spike the dragon. Enclosed are seven train tickets for your travel expenses, valid today only. I apologise for the short notice, but the matter I wish to discuss is rather urgent. My sister shall be awaiting your arrival at Canterlot station.

"Best wishes, Princess Celestia.”

A brief hush swept through the room. Somewhere in the back of Twilight’s mind was a hazy notion about Pinkie Pie being proven right, but it was the more prominent issue that came out of her mouth. “Why does the princess need all six of us and Spike? She told me that my private teachings on royalty and economics would be…well, private.”

“Maybe she’s just worried that without us you’ll bash your head in out of boredom,” Rainbow suggested with a wink. “But then, that doesn’t explain why she wants us to take the Elements of Harmony, too…”

Rarity and Fluttershy had nothing to add; they were still digesting Pinkie’s accurate prediction. The jolly pony herself had long since begun bounding around the room, shouting, “WOO! Canterlot is the best! Their chocolate fountains are the biggest ever, y’know, and I would eat my own mane just to take one bite out of a Fudge Supreme! I’m gonna break the world record for the number of balloons bought at once and use them to show everypony in Canterlot how to throw a proper party! WOO!”

Trying her best to ignore Pinkie’s rant and dodge her incredibly acrobatic performance, Twilight called to Spike, “So where are these tickets?”

Spike sank to his knees and groaned again. “Believe me; they’ll be here in a minute…”

The entire library livened into a frenzy of activity: Rainbow Dash demonstrated her share of Pinkie’s enthusiasm by inducing a tickle fight between them, Applejack coaxed Fluttershy from behind a potted plant and Rarity started shrieking that she could not afford to travel to such an established and upper class society without packing an unholy number of dresses and cosmetics.

Twilight approached her number one assistant and stroked him softly, causing his mumbles of pain to become intermittently broken by sighs of pleasure. “Come on, Spike. Get those tickets out of that tummy and start making a checklist. This is going to take some extreme organising…” 
> Chapter 3 – Converse With Caution
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

During her almost innumerable years guiding Equestria towards a future of permanent peace and mutual acceptance, Celestia’s grand chambers had rarely been host to an air of tension. Hostile emotions were usually experienced in the dreaded Conference Room, where her octet of advisors bickered to no end by firing their selfish arguments at any angle around the circular discussion table. Once a week she and her sister had to endure this eight-sided war in which compromise was a destitute notion, and Celestia would have happily fired every one of them a long time ago if it meant that their replacements would be more willing to think about Equestria’s issues logically. Unfortunately, nopony who officially qualified for such esteemed promotion behaved any differently; they all seemed to lose any sense of altruism somewhere along the hierarchy.

Her private space, however, was a haven from the stress these meetings so regularly induced. The sun never failed to gently bathe the upper floors of the castle in a beautiful light, complimenting her large but relatively functional room perfectly. Celestia refused to sour this atmosphere with her own anxiety, and keeping a positive mindset made for excellent self-discipline. If she did not show weakness even when alone, she could not possibly crack under the so often demanding glowers of her citizens and consultants.

But that evening, waiting for the arrival of a princess whom she had personally crowned, Celestia could not sit still.

It was by no random impulse that she had chosen Luna to greet Twilight Sparkle and company at the station. Her sulking sister had only relented to unlock her door half an hour ago, shortly after Celestia had requested that she accompany important visitors to the castle. The sun goddess had known that these arguably underhand tactics would work, but she was nonetheless heartened by Luna’s renewed efforts. With her sibling on the recovery from Discord’s verbal manipulation and Twilight now guaranteed an escort, Celestia had killed two Parasprites with one spell; exactly how she liked it.

From her balcony, watching Luna slowly blend into Canterlot’s evening glow as she departed had at least given Celestia something to do. She was pleased that observing the dwindling number of ponies in the streets bow to her sister had provided the usual gush of pride, love and slight amusement. But now that she could distinguish Luna’s form no more than she could a house in Ponyville from her position, an uncharacteristic apprehension was creeping over her.

This meeting is everything. If I slip up, the entire nation may well begin to question my rule, and I have little doubt that Discord would gladly rip apart any shred of shaky alliance we have recently developed to throw chaotic fuel for the fire. Yet I must remain calm; a state of panic is a state wherein one speaks without thinking.

Try as she might to remind herself that her intentions were ultimately good, Celestia’s hooves denied being at rest, pacing back and forth with relentless rhythm. Lying by omission was not a decision to be made lightly by a leader, especially when the majority of auditors were both respected figures and close friends, to her as well as each other.

At last Celestia managed to dig her lustrous hooves into the carpet, stopping their motion. Her wise eyes searched for anything that offered a suitable distraction, eventually falling upon the very new painting of Twilight Sparkle’s coronation. The mare shone radiantly in the depiction, her wings particularly prominent, but it was to no avail; even then Celestia was plagued with a deep unsettling.

There’s something wrong with that painting…

A dignified shake of the head vanquished her doubt as she attributed her paranoia to nerves. Celestia gazed for several seconds at the conjoined bathroom, wondering if indulging in a hot bath until Luna’s return would sedate the persistent churning in her stomach.

“I have to admit, I don’t know whether you’re just ignoring me or if you’ve actually achieved the stupidity necessary to not notice me at all.”

Startled as she was, Celestia displayed no outward show of surprise. Even without his unmistakable drawl, the words alone betrayed the identity of her uninvited guest because only one living organism in the whole of Equestria would dare address her with such brashness. She turned back to the oddly sinister painting and this time could not mistake the peculiar thing previously vexing her. “Hiding in Twilight Sparkle’s eyes, Discord? And here I thought you had better affairs to pursue than shrouding yourself in artificial varnish.”

A cackle vibrated through the room before Discord evacuated the painting and materialised in unpleasantly close proximity to Celestia. He continued to laugh helplessly, the only difference now being the absence of the echoing quality he had employed inside the artwork. “Oh, I’ve been annihilated in a battle of insults!” he choked. “Score one to you, Princess! Score one to you.”

“How long have you been there?” Celestia demanded.

Discord busied himself with picking his nose and flicking the results towards her dresser, probably aiming for the glass of water that stood upon it. “Well, this is just me, but I think a better question is: what has your poor carpet ever done to you?” Celestia’s fearsome scowl temporarily dropped to ponder his cryptic speech. “You’re pacing, Celestia,” Discord clarified. “You never pace.”

His infuriatingly knowing grin positioned right next to her face was unbearable. Celestia broke eye contact to walk to her balcony as calmly as her distaste towards him would allow. “I have nothing to say to you, Discord.”

“Really? Because unless my imagination decided to go that extra mile and played a trick on itself, I could have sworn you invited me to a certain meeting tonight.” A deck chair accommodated Discord’s lounging body as he reappeared next to her on the balcony. 

“Almost sunset, Celestia,” he remarked through a mouthful of purple cocktail he had taken to sipping. Adjusting the completely unnecessary sunglasses sat upside down on his face, Discord continued, “I do hope that Nightmare Moon returns in time to start my favourite half of the day.”

Any remaining fragment of wonder as to how Discord could have viably enraged Luna to the point of insanity melted. The anger in Celestia’s core blazed, but none manifested onto her outer being. “Our meeting is strictly business-orientated. Your presence is required to give some confidential information to the others in attendance. Nothing more.” Her line of sight locked onto the horizon, helping her to ignore Discord’s attempts to provoke her with personal needling.

But strangely, her unwelcome visitor adopted a cold silence. Neither of them conceded a word for what was surely a record peacetime between the pair, the orange glow of sunset making for an unlikely backdrop. It was only when Discord finished the last dregs of his beverage that he stored the glass which had contained it inside his mouth, disposed of his get-up and spoke. “Funnily enough, Celestia, the only reason I’m here is to talk business, too.”

A spark of concern flavoured with a hint of intrigue came over her. A God of Chaos who came to chat without the ulterior motive of satisfying his own twisted amusement was one to be wary of. “Forgive me if I’m a little dubious to that; I could count the number of matters you consider serious on a toy abacus.”

A chuckle escaped Discord as he folded up the deck chair and dumped it over the edge. “Absolutely, Celestia. This just happens to be one of them.”

His voice… It’s changed. Where’s the playful tone? Where are his jokes? I need to tread carefully here…

With hesitant interest usurping her hatred of his guts, Celestia trusted herself to meet his eyes again. “I’ll give you one chance to hold a mature conversation, Discord. What do you want?”

“Well, firstly I should say that I wasn’t really worried at all when I made myself comfortable in that painting. I didn’t believe you would ever put yourself at risk.” Discord’s face suddenly darkened. “But something you just said troubles me, Celestia. And I think it’s troubling you even more.”

The once light foreboding gnawing at Celestia’s psyche rapidly established a firmer place inside her mind. Although she now harboured an educated guess as to the direction of the conversation, playing dumb was far safer at the moment. “Explain yourself, Discord.”

The draconequus stood completely straight, forcing her to look skyward to continue reading his body language. Discord’s red pupils flashed with superiority; Celestia was sure that he was still dropping mind games among their rocky truce. “You told me my only role in our cosy gathering tonight is to unveil some secret information…all for gratis, I might add. But we’re going to have a bit of a problem if the information in question regards our little deal.”

“Our little deal?” Celestia repeated, still feigning ignorance.

“Acting dumb to the obvious doesn’t suit you, princess.” Discord’s body curled into a C shape, his voice dropping to barely a whisper as their eyes drew level. “You know full well what I’m talking about: the object I found in this very castle the first time I broke free from that stone prison. It incriminates you, Celestia.”

With the dangerous topic she had feared Discord would breach now torn wide open, Celestia could only push on to ensure she had knowledge of his dark aims. “Your point being?”

“Do I really have to spell it out?” Discord laughed triumphantly. “I hope you can keep your end of the bargain, Celestia. Because if you can’t maintain your poker face about what I’m doing, you might soon find that somebody rigged the deck, and the cards dealt in the next hand will tell the whole world what you have concealed for so long.”

Determined not to let Discord’s threats faze her, Celestia retorted, “I may have faked confusion, but it seems that you are truly stupid, Discord.” Pleased to see him blink in surprise, she went on, “Don’t you realise? I cannot reveal your crimes without shooting myself in the hoof; no matter to whom I might tell your secrets, doubt would immediately be cast over my own honesty and integrity.”

Discord paused for a few moments, as though weighing up the accuracy of her claim. Then a small smile wormed its way onto his face. “Touché, princess.”

Sick of the sight of him, Celestia made to end the conversation. “So, Discord, you don’t have to give yourself a headache over this. Our agreement will remain between the two of us,” she finished truthfully. Without waiting for a response, Celestia retreated from the balcony and approached the huge mirror on her wall, wanting to neutralise any visible signs of stress before the meeting.

She did indeed look tired. But then, though Celestia’s lips did not move, her reflection suddenly spoke. “Just remember…” Her mirror image disintegrated and quickly reformed to display an illusion of Discord, who stared back at her to issue a final warning before vanishing from the room altogether. “…I’m watching you, Celestia.”





One princess returning to Canterlot Castle would always be met with a horde of butlers bombarding her with offers of homely comforts and refreshments, complemented by a string of fanfares resounding from the castle’s musicians. Two princesses returning at once, however, seemed to deserve nothing of the sort.

“Excuse the lack of ceremonials,” apologised Luna, pausing in the centre of the enormous entrance hall. “My sister wished to curb any knowledge of our gathering from the public.”

A general nod of understanding flowed through the six ponies and lone dragon accompanying her. “I actually prefer it this way,” Twilight Sparkle assured her. “Getting crowded by ponies who deafen me and shove things in front of my face?” She shuddered.

“It’s fine and everything,” spoke up the impatient Rainbow Dash, “but why all the secrecy? I thought Twilight was here to learn about politics and all that boring stuff.”

The scowl Luna wanted to wear only got as far as a small frown as she hid her pain of being in the dark. Pleading Celestia for an explanation beforehand had yielded nothing, and the resulting sense of betrayal was horribly confusing.

Contain yourself, Luna! If Celestia sees reason enough to withhold her knowledge until tonight, I must throw my doubts aside and protect her ideals to the end. I love you, sister… and I shall defend you because my heart of hearts promises that the reverse is also true.

Composure regained, she resumed a steady pace through the castle, the others following so that they could speak without a booming echo telling everypony within one hundred yards their thoughts of the delicate topic. Although visibly deserted, the wide corridors were flooded with enough air to let them act as an ominous presence by themselves, never mind how a spying pony could dart around corners unnoticed with childish ease. 

Finally arriving in a small waiting room, Luna shut the door after Spike and was unsurprised to see Rainbow Dash looking more than a little miffed about being ignored.

The Princess of the Night smiled softly. “My apologies, young Rainbow Dash, and to you also, Twilight; I am unable to give the comprehensive answer you seek, if only thanks to my dangerously rich curiosity forcing my sister to deny me information before even Discord.”

The mention of his name injected a rapid wave of shock into the group. “Hold on jus’ one darn minute!” Applejack spluttered, having found her voice first. “Y’all tellin’ us that that long-bodied, manipulatin’, ugly son of a gun is gonna be showin’ his face?”

Suppressing the urge to correct Applejack’s trainwreck of mannerisms, Luna nodded stiffly, an ancient concoction of bitterness brewing inside. “Indeed. I share your concerns and despise him with an unfailing passion, yet I choose to trust Celestia’s judgement. His role will become clear during the meeting, I assure you.”

“B-But…he isn’t bad anymore, Princess…” When Luna’s eyes met the quiet speaker’s, Fluttershy squealed and hid behind her front hooves. “S-Sorry! It’s just… Discord is my friend…”

Luna slowly offered a royal hoof to the trembling mare and helped her up. “Although he appears reformed to you and has promised to somewhat improve his ways, I would not be so sure, little one. He is a slippery cad, and we shall soon discover where his true loyalties lie.”

Suddenly sensing the mood needlessly deteriorating, Luna addressed the group in an energised voice. “Do not fall into the trap of becoming demotivated only because a few lesser problems are mounting. Discord would be a fool to try anything remotely duplicitous tonight; we have the capacity to control him, especially since Shining Armour and Cadence will also be in attendance.”

Twilight’s tired eyes instantly flared. “My brother will be there? And Cadence?” Her recently plonked rear end shot up from the floor and she started wandering about aimlessly. “Oh, seeing them more often will do me wonders!”

In spite of Twilight’s rejuvenation, it was her behaviour before that had caught Luna’s astute attention. Entrusting her instincts with the simple task of being correct, Luna decided to act on her hunch. “I grow weary of chatter. The meeting begins in thirty minutes, and I would ask my subjects to settle into the Conference Room.” The group replied in the affirmative and left, Twilight almost joining them until Luna reminded her that she was her equal, not her subject. Spike shut the door behind himself, Twilight now her single companion.

“What is it, Luna?” she asked. “Shouldn’t I be getting my bearings too?”

With clocks ticking against her, Luna abandoned her usual expressiveness and charged headlong into her point. “Twilight, during the journey from the station to the castle, you were quiet, sulky, and had all the royal presence of a bedridden pensioner. Something troubles you, does it not?”

A prolonged grimace crossed Twilight’s face, as though her current natural expression was finally peeking out from behind a mask of smiles. “Is it that obvious?” When Luna deemed her question rhetorical by remaining silent, Twilight hung her head and sniffed sadly. “I’ve been having problems with Fluttershy.”

“Fluttershy? Discord’s self-proclaimed friend, and the mare who taught me how my language might be tempered and modernised?”

Twilight’s downcast neck bobbed up and down. “She speaks to me like I would destroy this dimension in a fit of rage if I’m not treated with an absurd amount of respect. My new status is paralysing her; she can’t be around me without acting like my slave and I…I just…” She trailed off, her voice breaking badly.

Alarmed at the severity of Twilight’s predicament, Luna quickly rallied, “But thou art an expert negotiator! And she a kind soul! Surely an intelligent and heartfelt speech can mend the rift of social distance blighting your friendship.”

“She’s too kind, Luna,” Twilight replied dolefully. “I just wish I’d have been upfront in her cottage earlier today…”

“You found time to visit all of your friends’ residences and talk to them after receiving my sister’s letter?”

“It wasn’t like that.” A sad chuckle echoed from Twilight’s throat. “We ended up having some notice.”

Luna listened with curious ears as Twilight told her how Pinkie Pie, a pony whom Luna had promptly concluded to be insane upon meeting her at the station, had foreseen a situation that would require the wielders of the Elements of Harmony. Although having made several attempts to pry open Fluttershy’s stoppered emotions while gathering the others, Twilight remained standing on a terrible pedestal in the pegasus’s eyes.

“I wanted to get it off my chest in the library, but with the last train departing so soon I was just lucky that Rarity didn’t demand a makeover before we left,” Twilight finished with a sigh.

“And, of course, a bustling train in no way befits a setting intended to ameliorate a relationship,” Luna confirmed to herself. 

Despite not being fully aware of Celestia’s reasoning behind organising such a hushed occasion, she did know that a mental struggle between two of the participants was not an acceptable state of affairs. “Make no mistake: our calling here tonight is of the utmost importance. I would strongly advise that you terminate this disorder immediately, before we convene; neither Celestia nor myself will tolerate any perturbation, and one guest already carries too much chaotic potential for my liking.”

“N-Now? But there’s so little time, and I don’t think I can—”

“There is time enough,” Luna said firmly. “Call her back to this room. Call her back and do not be afraid to show her your heart, Twilight Sparkle. Do whatever it takes to weave your friendship back into the fertile tapestry it once was, arrive punctually at the meeting and relieve your mind of a worry that need not exist. Do you understand?”

Twilight bowed, and Luna smiled in the knowledge that it was out of personal gratitude rather than obligatory respect. “Of course I will, Luna. Thank you.”

Vacating the room together, the pair of rulers went their separate ways as Twilight ran in the direction her friends had headed, calling Fluttershy’s name. By now the sun was no more than a crest of light straining to keep its head above the horizon, and Luna’s very essence could feel the moon eagerly awaiting its place in the sky.

So many times I have performed this ritual, yet so few have adhered to this feeling of momentous significance. A secret consortium, the members of which have all changed the fate of the world for better or – in one case – for worse, called together by the highest power under the cover of darkness... May the moon be our shining beacon in the blackened mess of matters into which I fear we are about to plunge.

Arriving at the foot of the grand staircase, Luna began the long climb to the peak of the castle.


> Chapter 4 – The Sausage Delay
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

As she entered the Conference Room with Fluttershy beside her, a habitual checklist composed itself without permission in Twilight’s head. It clung there with an irritating persistence, its latest two items of arriving punctually to the meeting and mending a cracked friendship eager to be ticked off. But Twilight could reasonably dispose of only one of them.

Well, at least I’m on time.

Twilight was grateful for the relatively boring layout of the room. Perfectly circular in shape; enormous banners adorned with familiar crests hanging at equidistant intervals around the circumference; fresh food and drink within easy magical reach at the back; and the timeless round table, a transparent symbol over which crucial decisions were made.

She noted that even what wasn’t there hinted at the room’s purpose, the total lack of raised positions telling Twilight that, in here, a peasant could declare their view and know it carried no less magnitude than a princess’s. Since all opinions were fair game, no other furniture bothered to make an appearance, probably because it would more likely end up hitting someone in the face during a blazing argument rather than serve a more common purpose of comfort. Perhaps a similar reason applied to why none of the refreshments offered high sugar content, and also why the single colour painted upon the walls – a very unprovocative shade of blue – simply sat there in the background, as if it didn’t want to get involved.

She was grateful for all of this because, after hearing Fluttershy’s reaction to her admission of pent-up frustration, Twilight could personify the vexing cloud now surrounding her own mind very succinctly: a swarm of maddening confusion.

Unprepared to initiate a heart-to-heart at such short notice, Twilight knew that her torrent of explanations and apologies had been badly structured—yet Fluttershy had behaved like a robot programmed with straightforward, generic responses. Neutrality almost to the point of indifference was neither Fluttershy’s genuine disposition nor characteristic for her to fake, especially not when under dire stress.

Twilight knew then that something disturbing ran deep within Fluttershy, and the cause had struck recently. Whether it proved to be a delicate, personal problem, or a terrible secret concealed for the benefit of another, her behaviour could not be excused by the coronation alone.

At least the pegasus had promised to suppress future urges to proclaim undying servitude to her, but having expected either continued resistance or a bawling breakdown, Twilight had no idea how Fluttershy now felt, and therefore no clue how much progress she had made.

Still, the predictability of the Conference Room somewhat helped clear Twilight’s congested thoughts and, to a lesser extent, play down the tangle of mysteries.

My options have been narrowed down to just the one: when this meet is over, I have to bring my friends up to speed and see if they have better luck. Together, we can surely coax Fluttershy out of that shell and accomplish what I’m obviously incapable of doing on my own.

Scanning the room to mentally claim a spot around the table, Twilight was pleased to see those same friends having settled in well, their thirty-minute wait seemingly enough to have bred an atmosphere of ease. An impassive Celestia stood in silence, eyes closed and magnificent horn glowing gently, but Twilight took the princess’s allowance of casual conversation as a positive sign that the reasons behind this gathering did not bode with serious alarm.

On a whim of curiosity, Twilight focused on the loudest commotion. An amusing scene met her eyes wherein Applejack was engaged in animated discussion with Shining Armour, whose contributions consisted mostly of hearty laughs, while Cadence performed flawlessly as a spare part beside them. Twilight couldn’t help a giggle; her brother had been enthralled with Applejack’s accent ever since their respective introductions, a harmless addiction which his wife was usually graceful enough to take in her stride.

Nearby, Rainbow Dash sat in what appeared to be contented bewilderment as Pinkie Pie’s mouth delivered a sentence that never ended. The explanation why Rainbow, irrefutably the most impatient mare within an Equestria-sized radius, always tolerated – no, actively enjoyed – the pink pony’s haphazard rants without getting the chance to give her own, swollen opinions was a box Twilight feared she might never tick.

At last Pinkie’s lungs demanded that she take a breath, and Rainbow Dash managed a few, enthusiastic words. Suddenly Pinkie dove forward to embrace Rainbow in her signature death-squeeze, after which point she said something that was clearly extremely embarrassing, for a furious blush flooded Rainbow Dash’s cheeks.

Her outlook bright at seeing her friends so relaxed and affectionate, Twilight’s eyes switched to the other side of the table, where they beheld the perfectly ordinary sight of Spike chatting to Rarity.

And an inferno of hate raged within her.

W-What? What was that?

Twilight blinked. Her senses discerned no change of surroundings since the fleeting gap in her composure, save for a subdued Fluttershy shuffling into a space around the table between Applejack and Rainbow Dash. Along with no perceivable instigator thereof, the monstrous emotion hadn’t even had the common courtesy to stay long enough for Twilight to be sure of its existence.

The knowledge that dwelling on the matter would only exacerbate her mood brought Twilight’s attention to the last pony in attendance.

Luna looked more anxious than anything else. Ever the less talented sister when the situation called for a figurative mask, her lower jaw maintained a permanent clamp on the opposite lip, and her hooves rapped periodically upon the table. Perhaps Luna was lost in the information concerning Fluttershy’s crumbling character, or she may well have been worried about a fact which Twilight herself only now realised: the final guest and his reliably chaotic entrance were nowhere to be seen.

Catching each other’s gaze after a few seconds, Twilight was greeted with one of Luna’s raised eyebrows. This was no acknowledgement, and Twilight responded to the true nature of the gesture as best she could. She shook her head through clenched teeth, allowed her tail to droop and, above all, shrugged with an air of total cluelessness. She hoped that Luna got the intended message.

I don’t know how it went with Fluttershy… I’m sorry! I just don’t know!

After a brief frown, Luna offered a sympathetic smile, countered by the firmness of her accompanying nod. Recognising the role-reversal, Twilight studied her fellow princess carefully.

The conclusion she drew left Twilight worried that she might be a simpleton, as the single solution she could glean from Luna’s body language was one applicable to every other difficult situation under the sun which her sister guided.

Be strong, Twilight Sparkle, echoed Twilight’s independent narrator in a passable rendition of both Luna’s voice and mannerisms. So long as courage is your companion, no problem shall stand invincible.

Her head fell silent.  Twilight returned the steadfast nod she owed, and soon the beat of rhythmic tapping filled the room once more as Luna succumbed to her disquiet.

On her second attempt to pick out a free space around the table, Twilight’s focus broke again thanks to a friendly hoof which was suddenly grooming her mane. Turning revealed its owner to be Cadence, who chuckled softly and withdrew the hoof. “Sorry, but I won’t have my favourite mare looking anything but her best,” said her former foal-sitter with a wink.

“Cadence, I’m so glad you’re here!” she exclaimed. Happiness emboldened her, and Twilight fired a question too tempting to resist. “Getting to spend much quality time with your husband?” she asked with a sly smile.

Cadence laughed in understanding. “I’ll get you back for that,” she joked. “I’ll admit, your brother’s ears are probably having a bit too much of a good time with Applejack given the circumstances, but I know that Shining is taking this as seriously as the next pony.” A faint spark invigorated her. “Still, we could have our fun too, you know. We haven’t greeted each other properly yet…”

Twilight could not have hoped to prevent the mischievous grin now spreading on her lips. “We haven’t, have we?”

After glancing around in unison to ensure they did not have an audience, the duo forged ahead with their rite of song and dance, chanting, “Sunshine, sunshine, ladybug’s awake! Clap your hooves and—”

“Burn them at the stake?” suggested a voice mildly.

Twilight raised her eyes skyward, intending to burn holes through the idiot who had desecrated their ritual. “What?” said Discord, half indignant, half amused. “I had to find some way of stopping you two from shaking your backsides at one another.”

Twilight opened her mouth to retort, but the insult died in her throat when the thickness of the air made itself known to her. Discord’s arrival had withered the environment and, although the multitude of talk bouncing around the Conference Room had not stopped, an invisible volume dial seemed to have been twisted firmly anti-clockwise. The predictable exception was Rainbow Dash welcoming him with a loud, “You’re late!”

Continuing as though he had made no impact whatsoever, Discord tousled Twilight’s lilac mane and addressed her again. “Look at you, all grown up and responsible! I feel like a proud dad, except that I’m thousands of years older, a completely different species and the reason why you suffered from extreme depression for a while.”

She tore his ugly limb off her mane and ignored his sarcasm. “Why are you here? We don’t need you or your malicious ways ruining our lives, Discord, so what is so important to Celestia that means your personal attack on her sister can be forgotten?” In her peripheral vision, Twilight thought she saw Cadence looking at her proudly, helping to imbue her voice with even more conviction.

Eyes darting left and right, Discord beckoned Twilight near with a talon. Hesitantly, she cooperated through a few tentative steps forward, but his claw kept motioning for their bodies to draw closer and closer until his mouth hovered a hair’s breadth from her ear. Fearing a classic act of trickery at hand, Twilight braced for an explosion of noise to rip apart her ear drum…

“Because I’m just that handsome,” he whispered.

Twilight sagged, her patience rapidly evaporating into the humid air. His face triumphant, Discord pulled away and cackled. “Ah, I love surprising you, my dear princesses! The four of you are my favourite victims. But a little perspective is always nice, so tonight we’re playing switcheroo: I don’t have the foggiest why Celestia is locking me in this criminally organised dump with you lot. For all I know, she’s invited me so I can chow down on her latest chocolate cake recipe.”

“Or maybe just throw it in your face…” quipped Cadence, making Twilight snort as she stifled a laugh.

“Speaking of cake,” Discord continued with a jab towards the refreshments table, “did you notice how there isn’t a single slice of it on offer over there? It’s a disgrace, I tell you. I’m off to see if there’s a sausage or otherwise suitably shaped implement that I can shove up an unfortunate area of the chef later. Toodles!”

And he departed, his casual float to the back of the room enlivened only by the sound of his humming and the palpable glares of varying intensity directed his way.

It took Twilight a few seconds to realise she was holding her breath. Releasing it slowly, her muscles relaxed as Cadence told her, “You handled that really well, Twilight. You’re going to do Equestria proud.”

High praise was always a buzz for Twilight, mainly because she lived restlessly without validation that her actions were worthwhile and morally just, but this time she found herself unable to accept the compliments; too much doubt lay rooted too deeply. “I don’t know, maybe,” she sighed. “I’m determined to do my best, but whether that will be enough to please everypony…” She trailed off, improvised modesty failing her.

“Hey, don’t put yourself down, Twili!”

Shining Armour trotted over and gave her a hug which she knew had been deliberately perfected since her birth, one that offered a physically soft blanket of touch yet simultaneously conveyed a powerful assurance. “You’ve got what it takes. I know the pressure multiplies like a Parasprite when everypony has so much faith in you, but it actually ends up being the helpful driving force that pushes you to succeed.”

A soppy smile spread across his face. “I should know; you were the one who said I couldn’t possibly fail when I became captain of the Royal Guard.”

The wholeness and intimacy of his logic touched Twilight, and she was reminded of exactly why her brother was entrusted with so much responsibility. “Thank you,” she said softly, knowing that Shining did not need to hear tacky add-ons to understand the depth of her gratitude.

When she felt that the moment had passed, Twilight moved to give the conversation a playful kick. “So, have you finally dragged yourself away from my friend’s seductive voice?”

“S-Seductive?!” he spluttered, casting terrified glances at Cadence. “I…I mean…!” 

His awkwardness was all the more hilarious to witness because Twilight had assumed nothing; Shining had slipped up during one of her routine visits to the castle with her friends two months ago. Having only just truly interacted with Applejack for the first time, Twilight had innocently asked what he thought of her.

And now here he stood, probably cursing his lax tongue. Faced with the prospect of either lying to Cadence or signing his own death sentence, Shining eventually made the smart choice and did neither. “Oh, Twili, you’re such a joker!” he evaded. “Applejack was just telling me about the Zap Apple harvest! Did you know the howl of the Timberwolves is the first sign that they’re coming? And their colour! It’s amazing! I had no idea that…”

Shining Armour continued in this way for quite some time, although whether his blabbering reflected a genuine enthusiasm or was merely a tactical shield against the potential wrath of his wife remained unknown to Twilight. She grew bored, scrawling invisible shapes on the carpet until a royal symbol upon it made her realise, with a start, that she had almost forgotten the apparent importance of this meeting.

What’s taking so long? Discord is here now, and I don’t think Celestia is waiting to see if he finds that sausage. We should have started ages ago…

Looking upon Princess Celestia again, Twilight was slightly unnerved to see no change in her stance. In fact, she wouldn’t blame a casual observer for thinking Celestia had frozen herself in time with magic; it was difficult to perceive her even breathing, only the horn atop her head glimmering with any sign of life.

Twilight jabbed her brother to shut him up before nodding at Celestia. “What’s she doing?”

“Checking for bugs,” Shining replied as if it were obvious.

When Twilight’s look of expectancy for some reason did not prompt Shining Armour to expand, Cadence took it upon herself to carry on instead. “Well, as you’ll have noticed by now, Celestia and Luna’s advisors aren’t here. I’m not entirely sure why that is, but one thing everypony in this castle is sure of is that they aren’t happy about it.”

Shining Armour concurred with a grim smile. “Celestia knows that they’re all nosy, pompous nutjobs, so she’s searching for any hidden spells they might have cast beforehand that would record whatever we’re about to discuss.” He ran a hoof tiredly down his face. “You know better than I do, Twili, how crafty subtle magic like that can be, so I’m guessing that’s why we’re sitting around like this.”

Understanding came, but with it arrived a familiar thirst for knowledge. Despite all her dealings within the castle, including for the duration of the coronation, Twilight had only caught glimpses of maybe two or three of the politicians and never actually spoken to any of them. More importantly, since much of the happenings during a court session were left to the ravages of public speculation, she knew that her comprehension of their personalities was likely infested with falsities and hearsay. “There are eight of them, right? The royal sisters’ advisors, I mean.”

“Yup,” said Shining Armour brusquely, “and I don’t care for any of them. Our duties clash quite a bit, and they’re always lecturing me about how I could do my job better.” A clear inner upheaval drove him to stomp angrily.  “Pah! I should march in here in the middle of a meeting and shoot down every one of their selfish demands by showing them how real life works!”

Cadence approached and nuzzled her head against his, causing his agitation to wane as he inhaled a breath of calm. “Thanks, sweetheart. Celestia is right, though; it’s that Dark Horse you’ve got to watch out for. You can’t trust a stallion who never takes off his cloak.”

“Dark Horse?” inquired Twilight, doubtful that any parent in their right mind would ever curse their newborn with such an impersonal, lazy title. “That’s got to be a nickname.”

“Yeah, a disturbingly fitting one for the pony who hides his cutie mark: Icon o’ Clast.”

Curious uncertainty quickly stole the forefront of Twilight’s attention; she had heard of Icon o’ Clast. Keen-minded but fierce-hooved, he was the unspoken leader of Celestia’s court. With a deliberate sense of equality enforced through the Conference Room’s very design and seven other agendas competing to win bragging rights, one could be misled into thinking that the other politicians would verbally grapple with Clast in as confident and self-righteous a manner as they would the stallion sat next to him.

But a recent memory merged with Twilight’s vision, and Celestia’s voice rang only six days old as she warned, “Icon o’ Clast is the most spectacular but also most unsettling unicorn of this generation. He holds no regard for his own safety and, one way or another, always chooses the path which results in the least fatalities, bulldozing over any dangling issues such as financial cost, national relations, tradition…and other ponies’ point of view.”

Celestia had indulged in a thoughtful pause before admitting, “Trouble is that his suggestions are often the best way to proceed. It’s a welcome change from the usual essays of propaganda, and although my other advisors share a common trait with him in their reluctance to compromise, Clast’s thought process is alien territory to them. A mind like yours, Twilight, would notice their fear of him before he opened his mouth.”

“However, do not imagine that we nurse a soft spot for him,” Luna had added, troubled experiences evident in her eyes. “Even we speak carefully on the occasions when his arrant ideals about the sanctity of life must be rejected.” Another heavy pause had weighed them down on them, and Luna had voiced her final mentation carefully. “Icon o’ Clast would sacrifice himself to save Equestria in a heartbeat, but he would just as soon silence you in your sleep if your blood sustained two dying Changelings.”

The memory ended on that knife-edged balance of character, and Twilight sympathised with the sisters for the thousandth time. “They sure have a lot to put up with, don’t they?”

“You can say that again,” Shining replied with a humourless laugh. “Princess Celestia has not been herself lately.”

Cadence sighed, and Twilight spotted a flash of contagious fatigue engulfing the alicorn; all ponies, it seemed, had employed brave faces to conceal their weaknesses today. “Shining and I worry for her health. It goes without saying that crowning a new princess is going to induce some measure of stress, but this has been ridiculous.”

“Too right, and I’m willing to bet a few bits that Clast is pulling most of the strings,” Shining Armour said with no shortage of confidence. “He’s given those two enough grief already just because he thinks your youth automatically means you can’t be a good ruler.” A scoff escaped him and he took a sharp breath, as if to launch into another offensive.

Then Twilight saw him change his mind. He chewed his lip slowly, hesitant to go on.

“Shining?” ventured Twilight. Eyeing her nervously, her brother grunted. “Is there something I should know? Don’t leave me in the dark, not now... I need all the help I can get if I’m to stand a chance of winning their trust.”

A pile of senseless noises was his response, which irked Twilight; she had little patience watching a stallion, especially her own brother, grunt profusely and then believe it a sound reason to excuse himself from answering. So, without a shred of guilt, Twilight pouted and gave him her best helpless-little-sister look.

And he relented. “Gah! Fine. Their trust is worth less than nothing, but I suppose the wrong first impression could tempt them to stir even more trouble. I can’t find a delicate way to put this, so—”

“Excuse me, everyone!” Three strikes of Celestia’s hoof against the table ensured her call was heard. “I’m happy to announce that nothing of underhand intent has been planted inside this room. If you would all gather round, please…”

Still eager to be in the circle of knowledge, Twilight motioned for Shining Armour to hurry up and explain. He shook his head, however, merely promising, “Later.”

Disappointed, Twilight skulked over to the table and found a space fairly close to the room’s entrance. She did not particularly care whom she neighboured, but Twilight vaguely wondered if fate had assumed control to order the party around the table; sat directly opposite was Fluttershy, whose eyes contained abundant pain as they looked to be silently pleading for help.

Wait! Is she ready to talk?

Unable to speak without arousing suspicion, and clueless as to the form of assistance Fluttershy so desperately needed, Twilight could only place a hoof over her heart and gaze at her friend with soft sincerity.

I’ll help you, she mouthed across the table. Everything will be ok… I promise.

Fluttershy’s lip trembled, and Twilight’s spirits soared when the pegasus noiselessly replied, Thank you.

“My deepest apologies for the delay,” Princess Celestia began from a position that could arguably have been called head of the table. “Firstly, I would like to remind everyone that this meeting is not a reaction to a disaster or a looming threat. But, I will take liberties now to assure you how important and also how confidential the subject at hoof actually is. There will be a lot to take in, so please pay attention.” Twilight thought she saw her glance at Pinkie.

Feeling a weighty disturbance on her back, Twilight looked around and smiled as Spike made himself comfortable upon her body. The dragon knew he could mount her without prior warning nowadays; they trusted each other implicitly. At any rate, Spike’s miserable height rendered him unable to do more than crack open his forehead in this room.

Twilight reached back and rubbed his cheek affectionately, an action that was rewarded with a toothy grin which left her feeling unnaturally warm.

Celestia, flanked left by her sister and right by the evening’s controversial guest, arrived at her final formality. “Do any of our twelve here tonight have any questions or objections?” Silence reigned, answering in the negative; not even Discord deigned to lob a nervy comment.

Celestia nodded, satisfied. “Excellent. Then we may begin."
> Chapter 5 – Counterpoint
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

If somepony during the height of my influence had told me that I would presently be hiding hundreds of feet underground, alone below the castle I miss more than any other structure in existence, I would have laughed and punished them for their insolence. Nowadays, of course, I may well have called them back and begged them to be my friend, if only to extinguish this terrible loneliness.

But either way, incredibly, they would have been right. Four days I’ve been stuck within these craggy walls, led here by my own desperation, no less. It makes my skin crawl to imagine what those who respected me would perceive if they were to discover me down here. To the uninformed, I must appear a plotting, shady villain.

Yet nopony can see me, and neither do I wish for anypony to observe how pathetic I have become. Even the strange insects on which I have intruded have regarded me thus far as an uninvited nuisance, and I know that – if all motivation to expand my ocean of useless wisdom had not already abandoned me – they would sooner dive into a rival colony’s nest than allow me to study their behaviour. Once again, my power serves only to drive others away…

So long as I am here, I cannot avoid giving off a tremendous aura of powerful magic, and I take virtually no consolation in the knowledge of how necessary this spell is. What pride can one take in their greatest invention when its purpose is befouled by that same artificer? Merely scurrying around like this, living off the rich sights of what could have been… I disgrace myself.

The whole reason I have crawled back to Canterlot now is to fix myself—but here I hide, waiting for my exuding magic to seep through to the ponies above in the cowardly hope that somepony will save me the horror of revealing myself first. Sooner or later, an astute unicorn will easily discern a presence down here. Only the safety of sheer distance can temporarily shield me from detection while I fret over whether enough dignity survives in these bones to admit how far I have fallen.

And so I find myself in this dank, forgotten dungeon of Canterlot Castle.

Worse, this essential spell which must constantly accompany me is proving to be a double-edged sword, one sharpened more lethally on my side of its length; constantly casting magic during these last few days has exhausted me, and I fear I may pass into the void if I can’t convince another unicorn to sympathise with my plight and lend me their strength. This loaded dilemma means that, even if somepony were to sense a disturbance and seek out the source, I do not possess the confidence to say I would still be around to actually find.

These are the arguments with which I have challenged myself throughout this wakeful nightmare, and I finally see how obvious the most healing course of action is. Although I have dwelled for an inexcusable time on such a clear decision, not even the most stubborn memory of my old self can now deny that I must kneel before my mistakes, and ask those whom I so selfishly used and discarded to raise me anew.

Yet still, after hearing all of these home truths and humilities, my pride insists that I curse myself with one more chance to do this alone.

I’ve delayed for too long already. There will be no better opportunity than right now, as I sense that a great number of powerful ponies – probably the royal sisters with those eight, creepy politicians – have barricaded themselves in a single, fairly confined space. Their reasons for doing so are impossible for me to guess, but I know only that I must take advantage and give my unyielding pride its last chance to preserve the independence it so avidly strives to regain.

But it doesn’t worry me anymore that I will most likely be discovered on my way to the castle’s archives. I no longer care if no scroll on the emotion I pine for exists. Indeed, I will not take false shelter under a stupid delusion that words could ever accurately record the intimacy of knowing another heart, for if they could, I would have devoured the pages upon which they sat long ago.

I only hope she can forgive me.





With ten pairs of expectant eyes already cleaving into Celestia, Rainbow Dash faintly heard her conscience order the dismissal of actively becoming an eleventh source of pressure. Ironically, however, this command was itself dismissed by her superior taste for tension and all things dramatic.

Rainbow knew better than most how a crowd’s collective attention surged through the blood, charging every atom with that beautiful rush of potential energy. But it was her handling of this cumulative force that had brought her to the top of competitive flying: she wielded a figurative key, one held in perfect balance of conscious effort and instinct, which unlocked inside her the secret to best exploit the energy’s release.

Instead of panicking and repelling the energy back in all directions like a cataclysmically uneconomical generator, Rainbow breathed the pressure as she would oxygen, immersing herself in each individual’s desire to witness a killer performance and amassing them all into one central location.

This location was home to the very reasons why she lived, and few entities nurtured the personal importance required to enter; only the drive to become the world’s best flyer, along with being around a special friend – whom Rainbow adored for reasons hidden even to herself – had ever stirred this place inside her. She was certainly not a spiritual pony, but Rainbow Dash liked to think it was her soul.

Then, of course, it was a simple matter of unleashing the blast in a single moment in time which coincided with the climax of her routine. The emotional ecstasy was indescribable, an inseparable joining of her passion and spectator awe. She doubted that her hunger for this union would ever be sated, and she was glad for it; the feeling had welded itself to her being as firmly as the stitches which conjoined her Wonderbolts uniform to the proud badge upon it.

Radical as these methods were, Rainbow’s wildest dreams had never managed to plant a single subconscious desire inside her head that might encourage her to pursue a more fulfilling lifestyle. And when her vivid imagination was dormant, was happily sitting back because her actual life could sate its appetite with leftovers to spare, Rainbow knew that there was nothing left to chase.

Except… Except for love…

The tears were upon her before she knew it.

No! Stupid pegasus! I can’t cry in front of four members of royalty, my best friends and some douchebag who owns a pink umbrella! This meeting. Important. Focus, Dash.

So Rainbow tried to forget about how her heart silently choked on years of its own unreleased love because she had no one who would truly accept it; about how her intimacy-starved soul attacked her every night with an agonising yearning to be held; about how her rumoured prowess with stallions was nothing but a self-inflicted lie to hide that her lips were still pure; and about how she harboured terrifying, confusing feelings for the pink pony sat right next to her.

It was impossible. She could wrestle her sadness into submission for the duration of the meeting, but her bed was not a place of safety. Not anymore. The warmth that her body enjoyed inside it was provided only by affectionless cotton, and her insides were a frozen block of ice with no melting point. Lying alone in bed just removed any last incentive to stifle her cold whimpers.

Unless somepony could explain to her within the next couple of hours exactly why she wanted to wrap herself in a warm tangle of Pinkie Pie’s limbs and kiss her, the unshed tears would not be denied the journey down her cheeks. They would simply return later to spill in a helpless flood, punishing her for the delay by stealing hours of sleep and replacing them with the loneliness that would reduce her to a sobbing wreck.

Rainbow Dash knew that the latter outcome was inevitable. But, just as she employed a full-on approach to blot out the pressures of her job and personal life, she also knew that Celestia would have her own tactics to deal with being the centre of attention.

There’s no way she doesn’t know how to handle this. We’re kindred spirits, even! She might strut her stuff with words instead of action, and her mindset is probably on a different planet to my adrenaline addiction, but the principle is the same.

Relieved that she was able to temporarily displace her distress, Rainbow Dash followed up by focusing on the Conference Room and, in particular, on the alicorn who had practically ordered them there in the first place.

You’ve set the scene like a boss, so come on, Celestia… Time for the main event…

And so her astuteness to Celestia’s strung position did not prevent Rainbow’s intense pink eyes from making their contribution. Tonight, she was just another of the crowd, breathlessly awaiting the promised show.

“You may recall,” Celestia began, oddly choosing to open with her soft, soothing tone, “that our fickle ally Discord here has been banished from Equestria not once, but twice.”

“Should reckon ah do,” Applejack commented, seemingly oblivious to the concept of rhetorical devices. “Ah was there fer one of ‘em.”

Shooting her friend a scornful look across the table, Twilight hissed, “Don’t interrupt, Applejack!”

A smirk probed at Rainbow Dash’s face. Thirty seconds in and her wingless rival was already bucking the wrong apples. Still, her forwardness carried a certain charm, not least because Rainbow shared that selfsame characteristic; it gave reason for her to cherish their friendship.

“It’s quite alright, Applejack,” came Celestia’s disappointingly sympathetic reply. “This is a meeting, not a lecture. I have much to explain, yes, but feel free to ask questions and express yourself as you see fit.”

Resisting the gaping invitation to express her own awesomeness was difficult, but Rainbow Dash kept her mouth shut. Intrigue about where Celestia was going with her history of Discord had piled more fuel onto her already ignited interest, the curious flames licking at her with a potency she had not felt since her astonishment of first seeing Twilight sporting a pair of impossible wings.

After a perfectly-timed length of silence, Celestia continued. “Discord’s most recent exile was owed to six of the bravest and most selfless ponies ever to grace Equestria: Twilight, Applejack, Fluttershy, Rarity, Rainbow Dash, and Pinkie Pie here tonight, of course.” Celestia turned to nod at each of them as she declared their heroism, and though her friends’ proud smiles probably were of sufficient acknowledgement, Rainbow saw no harm in quickly pumping a hoof to relish in her status before focusing again.

Spike looked downright offended.

“But what about his initial banishment?” Celestia suggested, coaxing her audience into some proactive thinking. “The time when Luna and I were forced to lock Discord in stone? Does anypony here, barring my sister and the deserving victim himself, know the crimes that cost him his freedom on that occasion?”

A mutual exchange of confused glances promptly tackled Rainbow’s worry that she might have been dumped out of the information loop. Her friends were riding in the same boat of ignorance as she was.

Strangely, the same relief was not settling upon Cadence and Shining Armour, who were also clearly none the wiser; their adjacent positions around the table were unified in strong concern. Perhaps, Rainbow thought, the lovers believed they ought to know already.

Then she realised that Celestia was actually awaiting some form of answer, as if the princess were a relaxed teacher who whiled away lesson time by enjoying her students’ blank slates.

…Well, don’t ask me. Even the egghead looks like I bought her a book about procrastination and clonked her upside the face with it.

Her mind vacated for an unplanned pit stop on issues involving Twilight – primarily organising the mare’s flying lessons in a simple schedule that would save Spike the crippling claw cramp – until Pinkie Pie finally offered the obvious, and then some. “Was it because he was being a total meanie? Did he open a candy store that put everypony else out of business and then start filling the cupcakes with poo?”

Sat next to her, Rainbow knew the baffling tangent through which Pinkie’s imagination was straying would only blend into yet more obscurity if her mouth went uninterrupted. Luna must have collided with the same realisation and tried to throw the reins back over to her suddenly very flustered-looking sister by cutting in, “Pinkie Pie, faecal matter isn’t exactly—”

“Oh, but then he laughed so hard he forgot what was in them, nommed on ten at once and threw up so much that he begged to be banished! And thus Discord was defeated by his own dastardly deeds!” By now Pinkie had arose to stand gallantly on her hind legs, finishing in a heroic, soaring pose that carried a likeness to Rainbow’s favourite posture in the presence of a screaming crowd.

And she wanted to laugh. Her body actually prepared itself for the inevitable fit of giggles: face contorted, stomach clenched, hooves posed ready to helplessly bang the table…but her abdomen remained constricted, denying the release of air needed for that first laugh to burst from her mouth.

Rainbow Dash tried to wonder why, but her head answered with only indistinct rambling; it had become a dysfunctional mess. In an overwhelming bid for rare seconds of total independence, Rainbow’s brain had immobilised conscious thought to blindly grab at any signal coming in from her body, scramble their intended messages and redirect them instead to her eyes, where they could gaze at Pinkie Pie and her oddly enchanting form.

Whether or not this rebellion had been fanned by the whispers enticing her to dive into Pinkie’s embrace, she could not tell, nor could she call upon the necessary faculties to consider it at all. Rainbow Dash simply found herself inexplicably content to stare at Pinkie Pie, while fleeting memories of hugging together brushed warmly against the more private recesses of her mind.

P-Pinkie... How are you doing this to me? Why do you make my heart soar but my stomach plummet? I-I don’t understand...

Discord had experienced no such oddities, however, and it was his gleeful laughter that dragged Rainbow Dash back into the realm of the Conference Room. Wiping a tear from one of his discoloured eyes, Discord managed, “Oh, what a fantastically humiliating way to go that would have been! You’re just giving me ideas here, Pinkie! See, this is why you’re my favourite pony along with adorable little Fluttershy. All these other losers are just so…boring.”

“What was that?” Rainbow growled, venting her frustration at being so out of touch with emotions her own spirit had birthed. “You’re telling me that being able to pull off a Sonic Rainboom in front of thousands is boring?”

“You uneducated ruffian!” squalled an equally outraged Rarity. “Hound at me all you like if my personal designs do not appeal to you, but I will not have a sordid word spat upon the fashion career itself! Boring is a description suited to the unambitious and lazy, and should never be confused with stylish simplicity. Regardless of taste, if passion and effort was weaved into somepony’s work, then it can only be admired!”

“Ah’m sure as hay not lazy,” added Applejack, “and ah can vouch the same fer all us here ponies.”

Becoming swamped by an ever-increasing number of sound rebuttals, Discord steadily cocked his head until his face hung almost upside-down. Along with a deceptive smile that now looked like a frown to his distrusting companions, Discord hummed lightly, as though hearing the fierce protection of their lifestyles were somehow amusing him. “Interesting. Well then, I’ll just call you predictable instead.”

Discord relaxed his neck to its natural upright. “Your life might be all about doing loop de loops at mach infinity or whatever, but when you’ve seen it once, the exciting edge dulls pretty quickly. At least Pinkie here can spout comedy gold and not even realise it.”

Rainbow grew angrier, detesting how he was complimenting Pinkie in such a sneaky, backhanded manner. She was being advertised like an attraction to be plonked on a stool and left for an insensitive crowd to laugh at, her quirky but pure heart nothing but a source of entertainment to Discord. Finding it difficult to fight this disguised injustice, Rainbow scowled as her head rummaged for a snappy comeback.

Before it could advance beyond the petty insults stage, however, Discord was already talking again. “Anyway, we’re veering wildly off-topic. As startlingly plausible as your suggestion was, Pinkie, I’m afraid that begging Celestia to stop my intestines from being regurgitated halfway across Equestria wasn’t how I ended up looking like a demented opera singer for about fifty zillion years.”

“Then what did you do?” asked Twilight with a tired grimace.

“Well, I would hate to steal our hostess’s limelight.” Prodding Princess Celestia with his tail, Discord sarcastically announced, “Forge ahead, almighty ruler. I permit thee to unveil my abominations to your weirdo friends.”

But Celestia shook her head. “My share of talking is done, and it’s time I passed the torch.” She paused, toying with a thought. “Why don’t you speak for yourself, Discord? After all, only you truly know how your mentality worked in those bygone days. What do you say, sister?”

“…I am not opposed to that,” Luna responded formally.

“Then it’s settled. The floor is yours, Discord. And please stop poking me.”

Yawning, Discord summoned an apple from the refreshments table and impaled it on the left horn atop his head. “My gratitude for offering me no input whatsoever on that decision. Appreciated. And I really don’t know how you expect me to stretch this into some sort of dramatic explanation. I could sum everything up in one sentence.”

“Go on then,” prompted Spike.

Juice had begun to secrete from the apple, and Discord stuck out his ridiculously long tongue so he might catch any rogue drips running down his face. “Erh schhole eh ewewents uhv hisharerhneh.”

Luna sighed. “Discord, if you retract your tongue, you may be able to form a comprehensible sequence of phonetics.”

Smacking his razor-thin lips, Discord tore the wounded apple from his appendage and launched it towards a hanging banner opposite, where it scored a bullseye on Luna’s artistically rendered flank. “I said I stole the elements of disharmony.”

For a whole minute, the only audible noise was shattered fruit splatting the floor as the few surviving apple fragments lost their flimsy, adhesive grip on the banner.

Rainbow was sure she had misheard the draconequus. “You stole what?” she piped up at last. “The elements of harmony? Well, that’s about as much of a surprise as me destroying everyone at racing.”

“My ears were surely blocked with something I will be thoroughly cleaning out later,” Rarity said, mortified, “but for a moment there they heard you say disharmony.”

“That’s really weird,” Twilight uttered slowly, accompanied by one of her priceless, befuddled expressions. “I thought he said that too.”

Seeming fully engaged for the first time, Discord leaned forward and grinned. “As much as I’d love having an excuse to bash your head against a wall, Rarity, your ears aren’t actually clogged on this occasion.” His talons danced on the table, their sporadic trot seeming to match his invigoration. “I suppose I could flesh this out a bit… I think a little history lesson is in order, one which doesn’t feature on your holey little curriculum of today.”

Discord shrugged and gestured openly. “You heard correctly. I stole the six elements of disharmony. See, thousands of years ago, when this single fang of mine still enjoyed the company of a full set of teeth, the existence of the elements of harmony and disharmony were common knowledge among the public. And, just like you six unlikely saviours, these elements had representatives called Bearers.”

Celestia nodded, adding, “By telepathic methods which we still don’t fully understand, the elements themselves would subtly draw these unwitting Bearers to this very castle, where we used to keep and guard all twelve elements.”

“Sister and I became very apt at recognising a new Bearer,” Luna remarked, a hint of nostalgia sweeping over her. “The symptoms were always the same: somepony meandering into the grand hall, scuffling with the guards and imploring us to believe that they had been guided here by visions. We would hang the element we suspected was a match around their neck, and if it glowed…”

“Then whoop-de-doo,” finished Discord blandly. “Another name to be worshipped by history books so obsessively that the Bearer could probably sue for sexual harassment. After a huge party celebrating the new representative and enough media coverage to deforest half of Equestria, the element was locked back into safe storage until some sort of disaster turned up, which was usually me.”

Her brain activity clearly in academic overdrive, Twilight was unsurprisingly first to jump in with a question. “Wow… So you’re saying that the elements choose the ponies?”

Wearing a bittersweet smile, it was Celestia who answered. “My dear Twilight, don’t you remember how you and your friends discovered the elements of harmony? It safe to say it was no coincidence that Applejack and the others, who had already been chosen by their elements, joined you and became your travelling companions. Do you see? Your new friends were drawn to their elements, and the element of magic revealed itself to you when you needed it because you had befriended them. The very reason I secretly designated the task of defeating Nightmare Moon to you was because I believed you were special.”

The helpless grin spreading across Twilight’s face was infectious. “So is that why it appeared to me? Because the element of magic chooses somepony not only because they have a knack for spellcasting, but also because they can unite the other Bearers?”

“Without a doubt.” Celestia raised an upturned hoof. “Still, I did not and cannot decide who stands as a manifestation of an element. I just followed my instinct and gave you a nudge in the right direction.”

Rainbow Dash felt a twinge of sympathy for Luna, whom she caught blinking back shameful tears. Having tried for years herself – in vain – to erase the memory of Nightmare Moon’s insanity, Rainbow shuddered to imagine the horrors of once actually being one’s own twisted persona, each day of normality thereafter undoubtedly stained with guilt.

A rising thought thankfully dominated her attention, stamping down the past. “Uh, question? You said you always had a hunch about which element was going to be the right one for a pony who wandered into the castle. How did you know beforehand?”

“Now come on, Lame-bow Dash,” scoffed Discord in a condescending tone that left her wanting to acquaint his face with an industrial furnace. “Use the space between your ears. There can only be one pony bound to one element at a time.”

“But can’t somepony stand in if a Bearer is out of town or something?” Rainbow protested, trying to ignore the sense telling her that Discord would just shoot her down after probably poking holes in the parachute. “What if one of them got ill?”

“So what?” Discord replied through beguiled chuckling. “What if the element of laughter’s Bearer keeled over and died because they had a severe fit of the funnies? What if they all spontaneously melted into fudge tarts? It doesn’t matter! Soon enough, any element lacking a Bearer would just choose another pony and, one way or another, bring them to the castle.”

Celestia rolled her eyes. “A little indifferently put, perhaps, but Discord is basically correct. The elements have a strange habit of ignoring circumstance. Through distance, injury, and death itself, they will always find a way to join with their Bearers and gather together to challenge whatever evil is at work. A mystery among mysteries, yes, but one for which we are nonetheless grateful.”

“I’m not grateful for it,” Discord butted in indignantly. “Anyway, it was obviously big news whenever the only thing a Bearer suddenly represented was a reason to buy death insurance, so the sisters here would be actively expecting a replacement and could sit around like cashiers waiting for their next customer.”

Luna cast a distasteful look his way, all traces of her hurt having vanished. “Your inaccurate portrayals and heartless wording are wrongly implying that we had next to no compassion, Discord. Our citizens were not disposable pawns whom we mindlessly lined up to test compatibility; all of Equestria mourned at the passing of a Bearer.”

“Oh!” With a sobering revelation causing her to yelp, Fluttershy blushed as the circular group focused on her. “B-But that means…when we pass away…”

Luna nodded sadly. “I’m afraid so. Without intending to vandalise your accomplishments, it is true that the six of you are merely one rotation of an ancient cycle. You will all eventually relinquish the deep bonds you share with your respective elements to ponies likely yet to be born, just as the drifting souls of Bearers laid to rest relinquished theirs unto you.”

A melancholic silence rented some time from their lives as they reflected on death’s inevitability. Frightened that dwelling for too long on the subject might lead her into exploring philosophies she had always considered unfunny jokes, Rainbow Dash rapidly found another outlet of thought while no one was speaking: Luna and her unfailing seriousness.

Rainbow was the first to admit she had a tendency to be uncompromising and somewhat ignorant to signs of others’ suffering, but she did not need to borrow from Fluttershy’s vast slew of experience to know that Luna was fundamentally damaged. Extreme jealousy had once corrupted her into seeking acknowledgement through evildoing, and the cure of her sister’s love had not been comprehensive; a cardinal component of Luna was beyond repair.

Although the alicorn had buried her pain from the subject of Nightmare Moon admirably quickly, Rainbow doubted that her insides would be synchronised with such calm and surety.

Keeping all that sorrow and regret bottled up for so long must be really tough. I hope she’s ok... Ah, heck, I’m going soft. Since when did I get so sensitive?

“Please, let us not drain ourselves of optimism,” Celestia said firmly, cracking the brittle air. Her horn glowed with magic, and hot drinks floated to settle in front of everyone around the table. “All of us here have many years in us yet. If we may move on, the next logical question is why so few of our population nowadays know that the elements of disharmony even exist. Again, Discord will be better off explaining, unless anypony has anymore ques—”

“Oh, pick me! Pick me!” Her hoof flailing about in the air, Pinkie Pie could have been mistaken for an overeager filly in a competitive classroom.

“Consider yourself picked,” Discord said distractedly, pouring half of his drink into his right ear.

“You said you used to have loads of teeth, right? What happened to them?”

Discord blinked. “…Know when to quit flirting with a dragon. Anyway, back to my criminal record. So one day, I woke up in a bad mood and felt like being a general nuisance to society. It was probably a Tuesday. They’re always terrible. But what’s important is that this day happened to slot nicely into the Elemental Festival.”

“The what?” Shining Armour sighed. “Stars above, this meeting is making me feel inadequate…”

“An old tradition,” clarified Celestia with unwavering patience. “During the warmest week of spring, Equestria used to annually celebrate the sacredness of the elements, and all research into their mysteries ceased for seven days out of respect. The Bearers of that generation would each wear their element around their neck and be flown all over Equestria, stopping at locations both rich and poor to spread messages of friendship and share personal outlooks. It was truly special.”

Discord gagged. “An excuse for a knees-up was what it was. Sentimental disagreements aside, I’ve already told you the rest. Since this was the only time of year when the elements weren’t hidden away more deviously than a stallion’s stash of adult magazines, the parade was a red flag to a bull. And I have horns. So I waited until the procession came back to Canterlot on the biggest, final day, and made my move.”

“What, you just ran out like a streaker and nicked the lot of them right off their necks?” Rainbow Dash said dubiously, absurd imagery forcing her to suppress a snort.

“Exactly. Best thrill I’ve ever had.”

While her husband still sulked over his heavily punctured knowledge of past customs, Cadence sat in total contrast: wide-eyed and enthralled by the flood of new information. “But why didn’t you steal the elements of harmony while you were at it?” the alicorn asked, voicing a valid point that had also just occurred to Rainbow Dash.

Discord’s raised eyebrow regarded Cadence as though she had just come out with the dumbest thing he had ever heard. “Well, these two sisters and the ten thousand-odd crowd weren’t just going to let me waltz in and take souvenirs, now were they? For once in my life, time was actually an issue. Besides, what would I want with those nice, honest necklaces? If you’re going to pull a heist in full public view and the only goodies on offer are a collection of old relics, you’d better make sure the ones that end up in your pocket at least offer some dark potential.”

“Then let me guess,” Spike said drolly. “You cackled like a maniac, announced your superiority with a terrible one-liner and retreated to your evil lair.”

Discord smirked. “Close enough, dragon slave.”

Rainbow saw Twilight bite back a furious retort. She had spent more than enough time hanging around and joking with Spike to know that Twilight was extremely protective of him; anyone who hurt her best friend, physically or emotionally, would next have to escape the terror of merciless, unhinged Twilight Sparkle. Worse, dubbing him a slave also indirectly accused Twilight herself of mistreating Spike.

But she can’t deny it after making him clean up the absolute wreck that Pinkie Pie made of the library, and she knows it. Haha! Oh, Twilight, you just love dunking that brainy head of yours into sticky dilemmas...

While Twilight fumed and Spike sat waiting for a defence that never came, Shining Armour finally resigned from his brooding and spoke. “You had your grubby paws on the elements of disharmony. So why aren’t we surrounded by monuments to you, worshipping the God of Chaos? Surely you tried to take over the world or carry out some other typical, villainous plan.”

“Ah, now this is where things get embarrassing,” Discord said slowly, his grin widening far too much. “Turns out I made a pretty big doo-doo… I had stolen the cookies, but forgotten that only the confectioner could open the jar, so to speak.”

Pinkie Pie took the words right out of Rainbow Dash’s mouth. “Um, cookies are really tasty and everything, but what are you on about?”

Discord paused thoughtfully. “Well, I’d bought the tool kit, but forgotten to take the DIY crash-course beforehand, if you get my drift.”

“Nope,” said Applejack flatly. “...Why, are we gonna build a barn or somethin’?”

“What Discord means,” Celestia cut in with a delicate chuckle, “is that despite his success in stealing the elements, exploiting their power was a physical impossibility. See, what nopony knew back then is that only species of pony – namely earth ponies, unicorns, pegasi and alicorns – can tap into any element’s reservoir of energy.”

“Picture the usability of an element as a hierarchy,” Luna evoked with a rare smile. “The Bearer naturally wields the most influence, being the only one who can actually siphon energy therefrom. Below them are all other ponies, able to communicate with elements in a crude sort of manner, the extent of which depends on many factors. But if you do not bear a cutie mark, the elements become selectively deaf; they will completely ignore you. Discord accidentally discovered this fact for himself, much to his own cost.”

A light bulb moment struck Rarity. “But of course! That’s why our first attempt at banishing you failed: because Spikey-Wikey was trying to use Rainbow’s element of loyalty!”

Rainbow Dash felt a surge of smugness at her exclusive access to the element, which then began an unwelcome battle with glum memories of how she had betrayed her friends when they had needed her most. With her mind undecided on a reaction, her mouth cued its default egotistical mode, blurting, “Yep, Rarity’s right. The awesomeness scale doesn’t even go high enough for me.”

“So you were doomed from the start!” Twilight mocked, a slightly perverse smirk topping off her miniature slice of revenge against Discord for insulting her and the dragon on her back.

“Right you are, brainiac,” Discord ground out in irritation. “Needless to say I was a bit miffed, so after wrecking some random stuff, I hid the elements in faraway, desolate locales. I figured that if I couldn’t use them, no one should have the privilege.”

Eyeing Discord carefully, Luna said, “Sister and I eventually tracked Discord down and interrogated him about their locations, but he predictably refused to cooperate. There was nothing left to be done but banish him, for despite the theft ending in no disaster, his intentions – combined with previous offences – demonstrated the unacceptable risk of letting him go free. We combed Equestria ourselves for many months thereafter, searching for the missing elements, but our efforts yielded nought.”

“And suddenly our story ends,” Celestia concluded with a troubled sigh. “Over many years, stories of the elements of disharmony faded into legends, then into whispers, and finally into silence. Luna and I still see no reason to revive these dormant memories…not until the elements are with us once again. Unfortunately, contrary to my previous assertion, I suspect there is just too much distance separating the hidden elements of disharmony from the majority of our population. And so, to this day, potential disharmonic Bearers walk about their daily lives, ignorant of how special they are.”

Rainbow Dash was speechless. Six more primal pieces of the world lay simply abandoned in Equestria, probably buried underneath thousands of years’ worth of corrosion.

The foundation of her entire life still remained as the joy of cannonballing through virtually every town, city and culture her country had to offer. Granted, the time she had actually spent integrating into the vast majority had been far too brief for her to technically claim to have visited, but not even the tiny tribe of zebras who lived secluded among the Everfree Forest’s thickest vines were ignorant of the name Rainbow Dash.

Those elements are lazing about all over the place. For all I know, I might have blasted right past the lot of them...

Celestia said nothing more, allowing her guests to fully digest the eons of history she had fed them in mountainous scoops. Another mostly ruminative silence eclipsed Discord and his fake snoring until Spike presented a startlingly rational question. “Uh, that was dead interesting and all, but… What was the point of telling us all that?”

Blinking several times in surprise, Luna turned to Celestia. “He makes a valid point, sister. I still cannot deduce why you bespoke our presence here tonight. To what end have we been divulging these secrets?”

“Isn’t it obvious?” came Discord’s sinister voice, taking the room by surprise. “Because I’ll ride a gamble I’d be willing to bet a few bits on. Celestia here just wants me to spill the beans on where the elements of disharmony are so you sorry bunch of misfits can play fetch for her.” Turning to Celestia, he quickly created a makeshift wallet from his own fur, into which he dropped a smattering of real currency plucked from his nose. “If I’m wrong, feel free to mug me.”

Celestia countered with a surprise of her own: shameless concordance. “And why should we not work together to reanimate these traditions? You claim to be reformed, so atone for your crimes by assisting in the retrieval of what you stole in the first place.”

Licking his lips musingly, a congratulatory smile formed on Discord’s face. “Well-reasoned, Celestia. Since I can’t forge Luna’s signature convincingly enough to exempt myself from doing something productive, I suppose I’ll collaborate with you on this one.”

Then his face darkened. “But one might almost think that you’ve had this planned for ages… That your apparent kindness in liberating me was, in fact, merely a ploy to set all this in motion…” His voice was casual and resonated with the nonchalance of someone speculating in pure conjecture, but the entire Conference Room knew Discord too well to miss the ominous accusation concealed within.

Rainbow Dash reversed her attention back to Celestia, eager to hear the princess retaliate with something of equal subtlety. Their story had only enforced to her that Discord and Celestia had been at each other’s throats for millenia, and Rainbow was extremely interested to watch how their timeless conflicts were fought and had developed after clashing time and again.

Her anticipation deflated, however, when Celestia retained her authentic pleasantness. “Not at all, Discord. I only chanced across this idea a few days ago, shortly after Twilight’s coronation. Your freedom is not a means to an end, I promise you.” Her tone shifted to become more serious on the ear. “But I will point out that our plan to collect the elements presents us the fortuitous opportunity to test the extent of your reformation.”

His body language uncharacteristically unreadable, Discord sniffed. “...I’m listening.”

“Here is my proposal, Discord,” Celestia said with neutrality deserving of a medal. “When all six elements are back in our possession, it is my hope that disharmonic Bearers will once again start being drawn to the castle. If, at this point, part of our success was owed to you staving off your evil ways and instead cooperating with us, then I would appoint you as their official guide and advisor.”

Sipping the last dregs of her drink, Luna never managed to swallow as her mouth spewed every last drop across the table. “Oh my goodness… Please excuse my ill-mannered effusion, but you cannot be serious, sister! Entrusting Discord with tasks to help our cause is arguably foolish enough, but to empower him into such a vital role… His track record must govern our decisions, and it reads only that he will betray us again!”

“Be calm, Luna, and realise that I did not decide this on a whim,” Celestia asserted. “As I implied, he won’t be honoured such a position blindly. We will individually judge his conduct while gathering the elements, and afterwards reach a mutual agreement as to whether or not he deserves that right.” Her gaze swept once across the table. “Besides, you and I assist Twilight and her friends, who are the current Bearers of the elements of harmony... Would it not be fitting for Discord to act as the new face of those who represent the opposite?”

It was clear that Luna would concede even before her held breath was released in a heavy sigh. “…Of course. I understand.”

Rainbow Dash managed to pinpoint a hazy concern that had been nagging her throughout the entire meeting, and quickly made it known before it devolved into a cloud she couldn’t put her hoof on again. “There’s just one thing I don’t get. Why do you want to get them back anyway? They’re the elements of disharmony. If they’re gone, then good riddance! It can’t be worth continuing some mouldy old tradition when we’re risking the world turning into a twisted playground again or something. And why did you even used to celebrate them? Weren’t their Bearers a bunch of stuck-up bandits?”

Celestia held up a rigid hoof to plug Rainbow’s outburst. “Your worry is understandable, Rainbow Dash, but it is the very moral upstanding of the disharmonic Bearers themselves that leads me to my second reason for wanting the elements back safely.”

“Moral upstanding?” repeated Spike sceptically.

“Yes. How can I best put this? All elements behave like dogs to their masters." 

A surreal scenario immediately staged itself inside Rainbow Dash’s head in which she was playfully calling her element of loyalty by name, whereupon it came hopping around the corner with a bone snared between its clasps. “That’s, uh...quirky...”  she offered, quelling her imagination’s new idea of walking it on a leash.

“Please ignore how demeaning that sounds,” Celestia requested, shaking her head lightly. “Explaining such a complex relationship is difficult. The basic concept goes thusly: if an element is bonded to a good heart, then it too will learn altruism and be unlikely to cause trouble.”

Shining Armour had already taken a wrong turn and lost what little he had been following. “What the...? How is that even possible?!”

“There is a more practical reason than simple fun as to why we held the Elemental Festival every year,” said Celestia, taking a small detour to better make her point. “On their own, elements are dangerous things; they are blind to everything but the characteristics after which they are named. Fortunately for us, though, the elements seem to acknowledge their shortcomings.”

Shining Armour’s face collided with the table. “...My question stands.”

Her voice carrying an understanding laugh, Celestia went on, “Well, as you might expect, elements choose ponies who live in close companionship with their respective traits as their Bearers. But, surprisingly, these ponies also always possess the mental strength and humility to know when their emotional beliefs must be set aside in order to preserve the peace. Somehow, through a medium which science is still unable to identify, this restraint is then passed onto the element when it is worn during the Elemental Festival.”

Twilight sat agape. “So all Bearers are estimable ponies?”

“Precisely,” Celestia responded with a smile. “However – continuing the dog analogy – when left to its own devices, an element will begin acting on instinct. In the disharmonic elements’ case, this is a nice way of saying that they will wreak havoc. Do you understand now? After thousands of years without their better halves keeping them in check, they are going rogue, starting to cause magical disturbances that carry an unsettling quality of wickedness. It was my sensing of these disturbances that led me to assemble us all here at such short notice.”

The number of times that Celestia had silenced the Conference Room was stretching into the territory of countless.

“So it really is essential that we retrieve them…” whispered Rarity.

Rainbow glanced at Luna, predicting to see her whole body telling of an even gloomier mood, but was surprised when relief cleansed her features instead. “That is one of my concerns vanquished, at least. A terrible unease has been plaguing me since yesterday morning, but the cause seems obvious in hindsight: these same disturbances which you sensed, sister.”

“I thought as much.” A shamed look crossed Celestia’s face. “I assumed you would either figure it out for yourself, Luna, or at least be able to cope until tonight... I’m sorry for not putting you at ease sooner. And I’m making assumptions about the rest of you, too. I have not yet asked if you will all work with me in this long and likely difficult task.”

“You don’t have to, princess!” Twilight answered before Celestia could utter a word of her formal request. “Of course we’ll help you! Right, girls?”

Never one to bother with small print at the best of times, Rainbow Dash had heard enough to recognise the benefits to be reaped for everyone, including a chance to satisfy her own adventurous streak. “Too right!” she shouted, binding herself to a vow that was accompanied by various other affirmations from her friends.

“Excellent,” said Celestia energetically, circulating the positive atmosphere. “Well, that is all for tonight, but the risk of the elements inciting something truly dark and horrific grows by the second... We will dive right into the search tomorrow morning. Still, we might as well save some time now by deciding on which element to pursue first. Then, after Discord discloses its location, I can arrange travel and supplies for those who we pick to collect it. So, from the six elements of disharmony, which are called—”

“Hold it right there, Celestia.”

The relaxed mood fled instantly. On a night when normal proceedings had already broken down and were now out of sight several miles back, Discord was keeping the guessing games alive by sounding serious for once. “I think you’ve forgotten something critical. Aren’t you going to explain what happens when a pony who isn’t an element’s Bearer tries to take it?”

Rainbow Dash had never seen the most prominent ruler of her country betray a flash of humiliation before, but she saw it now. “…Naturally, that is important. How could I forget?” Celestia rewarded Discord with a nod. “You have taken your first step towards regaining my trust.”

“Blah-blah, whatever,” Discord drawled, his apathetic self already resuming control. “I’ve never stood in the flesh for so long without doing something hilarious, so let’s get this over with. It might be more interesting – that’s more efficient to you boring ponies– to show them, rather than stand here ranting until somebody dies of dehydration. Perhaps a demonstration with the elements of harmony?”

“A good idea,” Celestia agreed. Her horn glowed, and the elements of harmony which Rainbow and her friends had brought on the train descended with a small thunk onto the table, arranged in a perfect circle. “Control is yours, Discord. I’m sure you understand how extremely unpredictable this is, so show me another example of your trustworthiness by handling this responsibly.”

The unease to which Luna had admitted was swiftly rejoining her. As if she were avoiding giving up her half of consent to Discord, Luna said only, “...This has never been done before. Not deliberately.” When Discord continued to stare at her in false innocence, waiting for approval which he knew he did not need, Luna yielded a grudging nod.

Humming in contentment again, Discord looked a little too happy. “Let’s make sure this is as random as I am. Twilight, you lovely new princess, you. Pick a number between a million and one and a million and six.”

Making to answer, Twilight suddenly stalled in awkward realisation. “Um… Isn’t that the same as picking a number between one and six?”

“…You are the biggest killjoy I have ever met.” Discord groaned loudly and dragged his lion paw over his misshapen head. “Forget it, you royal bore. Somepony else can have a go instead.”

Figuring that she had nothing to lose but the prospect of exploding if she stood in one place for much longer, Rainbow shrugged and called out, “A million and four.”

“Ah, the element of loyalty! You’ve chosen your own one! How moderately exciting.” Discord slowly lifted the element from the table with offensive inelegance, and Rainbow’s peripheral vision caught Luna stiffening. “Now, multi-coloured Dash, pick a number between minus one and minus five.”

She frowned. “What’s with the reduced option?”

“Because the host can’t also be a contestant,” Discord answered simply. “Now get on with it before my beard grows a beard.”

Ignoring the impulse to demand a less cryptic response, Rainbow felt Pinkie Pie’s close proximity help tame her frustration as she probed into the next round of Discord’s curious game. “Minus two.”

“Applejack!” Discord yelled in an overzealous tone, one not dissimilar to how Rarity tended to greet her friends at a party after giddying herself on far too many lavish cocktails that streamed from the pockets of handsome but ultimately doomed stallions. “Applejack, your good friend Rainbow Dash has elected you to be our guinea pig. Now you at least have somepony to blame if this goes horribly wrong. So, when I tell you to—”

“Wait!” cried Luna so loudly than even Celestia jumped. “While I acknowledge that your randomisation will prove our point beyond doubt, I insist that Princess Twilight and Fluttershy are the participants. I politely request that you all accept this without question.”

Huh? If she knows how dangerous this is, why does Luna want two of us to risk our necks?

A pair of bewildered faces pleaded Luna for an explanation why she was consigning them to possible injury or worse. Then, oddly, a measure of understanding came over Twilight in the form of an emphatic nod. Apprehensive interest stirred inside Rainbow as Luna calmly returned the gesture.

Looks like somepony knows something I don’t...

Wondering if she was alone in her maddening lack of knowledge, Rainbow studied Celestia closely and spotted the brief show of confusion she had been looking for. The alicorn did not intervene, however, saying only, “You heard her, Discord.”

“…Well, since you asked so nicely,” Discord said slowly, his own curiosity evident. Sliding the element across the table to halt perfectly between Twilight and Fluttershy’s conveniently opposing positions, he explained, “Now, you pair. When I tell you, all I want you to do is touch the element of loyalty at the same time. But! Imagine that you are in dire need of it. Manipulate your mindsets into thinking that your very lives depend on taking the thing. It is essential that you want it.”

Neither participant said a word, only fearful trepidation engulfing them both. Willing a share of her courage towards them, Rainbow Dash fidgeted as Twilight bit her lip and concentrated on Discord’s instructions. It was impossible to distinguish anything except raw fear from Fluttershy; she shook like a leaf in a hurricane.

If you scar Fluttershy, Discord, I swear...

Without waiting for the terrified pegasus to calm or be calmed, Discord said, “Ready? Do you want the element more than your morning bacon after a night on the cider? Good. Now touch it.”

Two right forelegs stretched across the table, and the duo found eye contact. Nodding to each other in weak reassurance, their hooves committed to the touch.

A blinding flash erupted from the element, forcing Rainbow Dash to shield her eyes. Panic struck her, but her body did not respond with appropriate urgency; her vision was taking an eternity to clear. Before her eyes could fully recover, another of her senses was assaulted as a horrified shriek that could only have been Rarity deafened her ears.

When her sight finally regained normal function, Rainbow wished it hadn’t.

Twilight are Fluttershy were gone.

Her instinctive fright instantly inflamed into conscious panic. The element of loyalty sat in exactly the same spot in the centre of the table, the light having dissipated and leaving no sign to suggest that it had just made two of her best friends vanish into thin air. 

Shocked murmurs that matched her quickened heart were bouncing around the Conference Room, but Rainbow Dash didn’t hear them. Seeking comfort, she merely made the mistake of turning to Pinkie Pie.

It was perhaps to be expected that Pinkie would be frozen in silence with a stunned expression exposed on her face, but this was of no help to Rainbow’s rapidly evolving panic. The pony on whom she had always relied for endless optimism, unfaltering friendship and a good laugh was not providing, and she was not prepared for that.

As though grasping for a positive thought amid the rush of dizzying terror, her mind thrust upon her unrelated, impossible fantasies of being engaged in an intimate embrace with Pinkie Pie. Unfortunately, confused as she was about her feelings, this only served to frenzy her more.

W-What’s going on?! Why am I so afraid?! Pinkie, help me! Why do I want to kiss you?!

On the verge of a mental breakdown, she submitted totally to her instinct.

Rainbow Dash wasn’t entirely sure what happened next. She vaguely felt herself crashing into a fight-or-flight state of mind, but the only enemy was impossible to combat; the notion of attacking the element which she herself represented was absurd. With nothing to fight, Rainbow felt her pounding against the carpet, and she realised that her body was taking her away from prying eyes so she could be sick.

Voices called out after her, and her last thread of common sense was screaming at her that, if something unthinkable had indeed happened to her friends, then the royal sisters would have exploded into action...but her choices were not her own anymore.

Rainbow Dash felt the first drops of bile climb her throat as she fled the Conference Room.
> Chapter 6 – A Heart's Blockade
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

Rarity’s sole companion was considerable irony as she ascended a suavely decorated flight of stairs, mainly because her respect for the interior designers of Canterlot Castle was rapidly plummeting back down them.

No toilets on the same floor as the Conference Room? Honestly, did pure beauty bedazzle even history’s architects so much that functionality was a dirty word?

Shooing her inner fashionista, Rarity reminded herself that her unacceptably long journey to the bathroom was only half for her own benefit. Ascertaining Rainbow Dash’s whereabouts while she was at it was a task that had been wordlessly left to her upon excusing herself from the Conference Room. Rarity wished that the search could come second to relieving herself, but the sheer franticness surrounding Rainbow’s strange departure had put the pegasus’s safety and mental well-being in high priority.

I can kill two Parasprites with one spell if she behaved as a proper lady might and adjourned to the nearest bathroom, rather than following that irksome habit of hers and flying off. I do not want to venture outside at this time of night.

Rarity arrived at the top of the stairs. Adopting a dignified trot, she calibrated her eyes into picking out only the national symbol for a restroom, forcing them to remain unresponsive to what was clearly a horrendous choice of wallpaper. The grand corridor stretched so far it almost achieved its own horizon, but Rarity did not so much as lengthen her stride; although only the cool night air passed her on the corridor, she would not let herself slip into a flustered hurry.

Just when the prospect of attempting a complex tracing spell to track down her friend was becoming an unpleasantly logical choice, Rarity spotted her destination opposite the entrance to the Starswirl the Bearded wing of the castle’s library.

Reading traced a particularly faint line in her life, not least because she was a self-taught designer and seamstress who found non-fiction insufferable. So, as she had once explained to Twilight’s outraged face, books – namely those exclusive to tales of impossible romance – were mildly interesting things to be read when, and only when, less than three deadlines were not leaving her career hanging in the balance.

Rarity was not given the chance to reprimand her wandering thoughts a second time; they vanished of their own accord when her attention was stolen by a number of strange inconsistencies in her surroundings. Some blended in with more ominous vagueness than others, but the first was staring her in the face.

For some reason, a tangled pile of buckets, brooms and other such cleaning material had been unceremoniously dumped in front of the mare’s bathroom, blocking entry to all but a curious moth. Liquid still rained from several mops, the heads of which were all erected upwards and spread abreast to flood the entire entrance with a deluge of freezing water. Swallowing nervously, Rarity realised that the mess had been thrown together recently…and quite deliberately.

Somepony doesn’t want to be disturbed…

Then there was the other oddity: the library door stood opposite.

I’ve never even seen this part of the castle before, so why is my intuition bothering me? I just can’t put my hoof on it, but something is missing on that door…

The most worrying issue made itself known last as a putrid stench suddenly assaulted Rarity’s nostrils. Her head swung around again to observe the sodden mess standing in the way of her and an empty bladder, and it quickly dawned on her that there was something very unsavoury in one of the buckets.

However, as discouraging as this might have been to a casual passer-by, Rarity felt her determination to investigate strengthen. The signs pointing towards Rainbow Dash’s location were the same as those directing Rarity to this very bathroom, and she would not be stopped by debris whose primary purpose was to clean in the first place.

Levitation was the most obvious solution. As was tradition among unicorn families, the spell and its endless practicalities had been taught to Rarity at a tender age by her parents. Since she still casted it on a regular basis during the delicate process of stitching dresses, Rarity knew it was well within her capacity to individually pick up each object, carefully free them from each other’s entanglement and set them down to one side, one at a time.

This was, of course, the problem.

The cleaners can go to the moon if they expect me to spend entire minutes tidying up their own equipment. My friend has barricaded herself behind it with nothing but her own terrified thoughts for company! Alone! Unstable! I must save her! I must!

And so, ignoring the inner perfectionist that was warning her of a tantrum if she wasn’t gentle, Rarity magically encouraged a dense pocket of air to congregate in the centre of the pile. Figuring she might as well retain good habits by making everything she did spectacular, she packed the air in huge volumes, forcibly squeezing the area it occupied for every last unit of pressure…before unleashing it outwards in a concentrated sphere.

The heap exploded. “I’m coming in, Rainbow Dash!” Rarity called, as if the clattering din were not forewarning enough. Hopping over the drenched floor and through the now unobstructed entrance, she was unsurprised to find the place seemingly deserted—save for one locked stall.

A spell could breach that easily enough, but I don’t want to push for her cooperation through such insensitive, invading means. A more passive approach, though…

Aware that Rainbow Dash was unpredictable right down to her snoozing schedule, Rarity opted for a civilised outset and knocked twice.

The verbal silence which she had expected was her answer, but through strained ears she could hear a rhythmic, beating sound on the other side. Quiet though it was, the noise virtually confirmed that her hunch had been flawless.

“I know you’re in there, Rainbow!” The proclamation earned no reply. “It’s no use hovering to try and hide your hooves; I can hear your wings flapping!”

Proof by logic was not working either, so Rarity reluctantly stooped to playing a beguiling yet completely honest card. “I have something to tell you, darling, and I won’t voice it to a block of solid metal that I have to pretend is your face. Now, please come out.”

When she still received no admission, Rarity exhaled a testy sigh that was weighted with more frustration than she had intended.

I need to raise the stakes a notch.

Stirring her dormant pool of magic, she allowed her horn to glow loudly. “Or must I unlock this door for you?”

“No!” The pegasus landed clumsily, a loud crack telling Rarity that Dash had staggered into one of the walls. “D-Don’t come in!”

So frightened was her tone that, under any other circumstances, Rarity would have thrown a scornful rebuttal at anyone who suggested it might belong to Rainbow Dash. But even if circumstance had not chained together with enough clarity, the characteristic, helpless breaking of Rainbow’s voice – frequented more often than ever thanks to her insecurity – made it undeniable.

Before Rarity could decide on a constructive course of action, Rainbow defeatedly added, “Please don’t, Rarity… I’m a mess…”

“I don’t mind.” Scolding herself for thus far merely pressing Dash when the pegasus was so clearly suffering, Rarity spoke calmly and sympathetically. “I don’t care how you look. It’s your insides that matter, and they’re hurting, aren’t they? Please, darling, let me in. Let me help you.”

For a whole minute, nothing happened, and Rarity found herself left with only meaningless apologies that her trembling lips could not form.

Even if she could have given another thousand reasons for Dash to emerge, the terrible shame born of her provocative methods would have silenced them. Each passing second cemented Rarity’s fear that she had failed her friend more and more firmly within her, and liquid stung her eyes as they welled.

This punishment is no less than I deserve…

“R-Rainbow… P-Please, I…” She came terribly close to begging for both Rainbow’s trust and her forgiveness when a small click saved her the words.

The stall door swung open, and Rarity stared at Rainbow Dash’s tear-streaked face.

A mess did not justify the heartbreaking condition of the pegasus. Each breath of her lungs escaped through audible shivers, colour was bleeding from her mane to destroy its often envied brilliance, and her soft, blue cheeks had paled to the point of lifelessness. Rarity’s stomach churned as she watched flecks of a viscous, yellow fluid slue from the corners of Dash’s mouth, and the identity of the foul smell from before became horribly apparent.

“Oh, darling…!” Seeing Rainbow’s pupils cower inside her eyes cued the tears to fall from Rarity’s glistening own. “What have you done to yourself…?” She was met with neither resistance nor returned affection when her hooves crossed the three yards distancing her from Dash’s blatant need for a hug and held her loyal friend closely.

“I… It’s nothing,” murmured Rainbow Dash into her ear. But her body itself betrayed this as a lie; though invisible to observation alone, the spasmodic tremors wracking Dash’s deep muscles could not hide from Rarity’s embrace. “Please, it’s nothing…” she repeated pathetically.

She knows I don’t believe her. I think she’s trying to convince herself that this isn’t happening…

Refusing to let Rainbow credit her own denial, Rarity withdrew her head from nuzzling but kept a hoof engaged in gentle strokes along the pegasus’s back. “You’ve been crying, Rainbow. That isn’t nothing. Your body is asking you to find somepony who will be there for you, and I want to be that pony.”

She dabbed at her eyes, hoping that Dash might respond to a true show of strength and friendship. “I won’t let your stubborn independence tear you apart.”

“I’m fine...”

Rarity felt her patience taper dangerously close to non-existence again. “No you are not, Rainbow Dash! You’re pale, you’re shaking, you’re gasping for air and I know that you…well…” – the taste of the disgusting word dirtied Rarity’s mouth before she expelled it from her sophisticated tongue – “...vomited into one of the same buckets that you used to lock yourself in here! Even Sweetie Bell could recognise the symptoms—you’ve had a panic attack!”

The direct approach struck the bullseye. Rainbow Dash, whose hooves had up to now remained grounded in a choked attempt to cope without a friend, finally abandoned her self-destructive behaviour and threw herself at Rarity. “I know!” she managed through clenched teeth. “I know! Please don’t tell the others! You can’t tell Pinkie!”

“I won’t,” Rarity promised, her relief bursting in a dam that gushed with similar magnitude to the sudden caving of Rainbow Dash.

The natural question as to why Dash especially abhorred the idea of Pinkie Pie learning of her affright was itching to be asked by Rarity’s habitual gossip tendencies, but even she knew the line had to be drawn in permanent ink when a friend of many years was weeping into your neck.

“That’s right, darling…” she soothed, their rare hug quietly affixing new bridges of trust between both hearts. “Let it all out…”

It took some time for Rainbow’s sobs to subside.

Gradually, the number of warm drops falling onto Rarity’s skin waned until she knew her friend’s eyes were dry, but this was no guarantee of stability. A mare remained an emotional wreck after a breakdown, and Rarity waited until she could hear no more than the occasional sniffle before reluctantly disengaging from their bubble of comfort and guiding the pegasus to the sinks.

Warm water. Paper towels. And magic. That’s all I need.

With this simple trio and a delicate touch, Rarity cleaned Rainbow Dash in silence. Only the steady trickle of a single tap occupied their ears as tears, bile and a measure of shame were all washed from various regions of Rainbow’s face.

However, as Rarity knew it would, the unspecialised purpose and stark unwieldiness of a wet bit of tissue soon proved hopelessly inadequate against her mane. Staring into the mirror with trembling lips, Rainbow Dash seemed to realise that her prized feature was ruined beyond immediate repair.

No! I won’t let you hate the sight of yourself! I know how much that hurts!

Determination setting her magic ablaze, Rarity saturated all of her cosmetic knowledge and experience into an almost instinctive spell that manifested as an alabaster shimmer engulfing her modest horn.

Rainbow Dash yelped as the same white light swept gracefully through her mane, breaking down any substance that did not harmonise with natural beauty. Now absolutely spotless, a new rainbow of colour infused into her mane to restore its magnificent spectrum, and the gust-like effect of the spell flared every strand of her hair into perfect style.

As an unexpected side effect – or perhaps it was just massive embarrassment at being so successfully beautified by a unicorn whom she never allowed near her with a brush – warmth raced through her cheeks, flushing them with such renewed life that Rainbow Dash was soon blushing fiercely.

Appraising her reflection once more, the pegasus wore an astounded look. “T-That was…” she stammered. “I mean, I’m…”

“I believe the word is beautiful, darling,” Rarity said, smiling softly. Pleasantly surprised by her own handiwork, she acknowledged Rainbow’s silent thanks with a firm nod that would accept no more talk on the relatively trivial subject.

Now, let us get to the bottom of why the poor dear needed that at all.

Hoping that the upfront approach which had snapped Dash into the reality of her distress would bear fruit a second time, Rarity forewent arduous hinting and spoke concisely. “Before we return to the Conference Room, dear, I would be neglecting my duty as a friend if I were not to ask: whatever drove you to enter such a frenzied state of mind?”

Rainbow Dash shrugged a little too carelessly as she answered, “Oh, y’know, just the shock of seeing Twilight and Fluttershy disappear like that. And stuff…”

The combination of a heavy pause and Rarity’s raised eyebrows made Dash break the essentiality for eye contact when attempting to lie. “Darling,” Rarity said seriously, “I will give you another chance to tell me what is truly breaking your heart in a moment, but while we’re on the subject... It was supposed to happen.”

“Huh?”

“It was meant to happen, Rainbow,” Rarity repeated, glad she was a messenger who carried no grounds to fear being shot. “This is what I wanted to tell you. You ran off so quickly that you didn’t hear Princess Celestia say she was expecting Twilight and Fluttershy to vanish.”

Astonishment made a swift return to Rainbow Dash’s face. “Really?! But why? Where are they now?”

I wish I knew.

Irked as she had been at being denied further information after asking the royal sisters, Rarity assumed an optimistic tone as she spoke, in case Rainbow crumbled again. “I was told nothing else… I’m sorry. But Celestia has faith that they will return safely, and she also promised to explain everything when we’re all back together.”

“…”

Upon discerning that her brittle reassurances were regardless rooting more doubt in the pegasus’s mind, Rarity quickly rallied, “Who knows, maybe they’re back already! The most important thing to remember is that Celestia would never risk putting anypony in grave danger, especially when one of them is her lifelong friend and student who has just become a princess herself. The situation is in hoof, darling.”

Although Dash’s nod of understanding thankfully closed the topic, her resistance in yielding the cause of her hardship remained steadfast. “That’s great and everything, but I didn’t know that! I really respect Twilight, and Fluttershy’s been my best friend since forever! I hoofed it ‘cause I got really scared that they weren’t coming back! Honest!”

She’s telling the truth, but it’s plain as day there’s some omission. Why must you invite more pain upon your troubled heart, darling? Your eyes are telling me that something still eats you alive!

Pouncing with her refined eloquence, Rarity reasoned, “I don’t doubt that terror and stress acted as the trigger, but a trigger does not discharge without ammunition. And you cannot expect me to believe that what happened was the only source; you are far braver than I, yet your body attacked itself from terror!” She sighed softly and offered an open, supportive hoof. “Please, Rainbow, I thought we were past pretending to be fine. Don’t you trust me?”

“…We don’t talk.”

Rarity suddenly felt like their relationship was somehow backpedalling on a flat plane. “I beg your pardon?”

“You and me,” Rainbow said blandly. “We don’t have anything in common. I don’t think we’ve ever told each other anything private. We don’t talk.”

Something sharp pricked Rarity in a sensitive place. “That isn’t true, Rainbow Dash,” she said quietly, unable to prevent hurt from thickening her voice. “I know you. I know you well enough to know that the pony standing in front of me isn’t the Rainbow Dash I know and love. That pegasus is my friend, and I want her back.”

Rarity actually saw Rainbow Dash throw all caution to a raging hurricane moments before she yelled, “Then tell me it’s ok to be in love with another mare!”

W-WHAT?!

But the floodgates had opened, and swarms of confessions in poor disguise were streaming from Rainbow Dash’s mouth. “Tell me it’s ok that all my life I’ve lied about sleeping with stallions who I never found attractive! Tell me it’s ok that I’m jealous of a baby alligator because she loves it more than me! Tell me she loves me back!”

With most of her brain threatening to incite a panic attack of its own, Rarity was left speechless.  Whatever faculties that were still listening to Rainbow’s deteriorating shouts, however, came to realise that she was not shouting at all—she was pleading. “Tell me it’s ok that I just want to look into her eyes, and hold her, and kiss her, and…a-and… Please tell me…”

No suitable words were bothering to occur to Rarity and her dumbfounded mind, so she ended up galloping into another hug, if only to keep them both from doing something regrettable until she could muster a few phrases of general comforting. “Shhh… It’s ok…” Rarity whispered.

The shock soon lifted, and Rarity found herself berating the severity of her own reaction. “It is ok, Rainbow Dash. Loving another mare is perfectly normal and certainly nothing to be ashamed of.”

“R-Really?”

“Really.” Rarity paused, evading a guilty image that had plagued her more than once that day: exploiting Spike’s adoration for her when she was still unsure whether their platonic relationship could develop—if she wanted something more. “I admit, I cannot empathise with the feeling of crushing on a mare, but love is love, darling. It makes us lie, it makes us envy those closest to our desires, and yes, sometimes it consumes our lives so fully that before we know it we’re crying, hating ourselves and wanting to be sick. I do not blame you for running away at all.”

Rainbow relaxed into her embrace, and Rarity knew that their new, mutual understanding would never again permit doubt of their friendship’s strength to do as little as stick its poisonous foot in the door. “Thanks, Rarity,” said Rainbow Dash with a relieved sincerity.

“How long, darling?”

Sighing reminiscently, Dash evidently understood the drift of the question. “Ever since she showed me what true happiness is…”

Rarity thought it an insult to inquire the mare’s name after such a heartfelt admission, and chose to simply enjoy another hug that reaffirmed their bonds.

Then something clicked inside her head.

Did Rainbow Dash say she was jealous of an alligator? But then, that means…!

She had no idea whether the two and two which she had put together was giving her a solid four, or if she was so wrong that the four was merely one digit of an unsayable number that would give Twilight Sparkle a migraine. Even so, the possibility alone was stimulating the hopeless romantic within Rarity.

I shall have to discreetly observe their behaviour around each other at the soonest opportunity. Oh, this is positively giddying!

Since she was a very cuddly unicorn – as long as no dirt dared to breach a five-yard radius, at least – Rarity was a little disappointed when Rainbow shuffled awkwardly against her. “Uh… I like being cosy and all, but I think we might be rivalling Pinkie Pie here.”

Chuckling daintily, Rarity released her. “Yes, the laid-back, haphephobic-hooved pegasus I befriended all those years ago is here with me again. Now, please excuse me for a moment; I must exorcise an agitated poltergeist roaming my waterworks.”

You need to exercise what?” Rainbow asked, baffled. Only when Rarity entered a cubicle and locked herself therein did the pegasus utter, “Oh! You need the toilet.”

After Rarity had freed her figurative ghost, washed her hooves and touched up her appearance, she turned to Rainbow Dash and her impatient, scuffing hooves. “Well, the Conference Room awaits. I do hope that Twilight and Fluttershy are waiting for us. Shall we?”

“Most sense I’ve heard all day,” Dash replied, entering a relaxed hover and making for the exit.

Ah! No, no, no! One of the buckets I destroyed on the way in contained Rainbow’s...mouth-excrement! Why did you exacerbate things, you silly unicorn?!

Unfortunately, whereas Rainbow Dash had the wings to fly right over the sopping mess, Rarity had only the spring in her hooves and a silent prayer that she might avoid landing in pegasus sick. By evolving her previous hop into a graceful leap, however, Rarity’s hooves alighted upon the corridor luckily unscathed.

Now busy examining herself in a window to ensure she was sufficiently preened for another formal session, Rarity only heard Rainbow Dash remark, “That’s weird.”

Frowning at an onset of déjà vu, Rarity vaguely remembered thinking the same thing upon her initial arrival outside the bathroom. She dismissed the irritating nag and did not look up as she called, “I know something feels iffy, darling, but I simply can’t pinpoint the source. What say we let it be and take our leave, hm?”

“Say that after looking at this.”

Her frown deepened. The prospect of more delays was not welcome to Rarity, but her curiosity could hardly ignore answers to the acute warning signs she had sensed before. “What troubles you, dear?”

Rainbow jabbed a hoof to direct her gaze towards the floor, and the lone object lying broken upon it instantly justified the pegasus’s concern.

“Oh, my… Now that is disconcerting…”

The cause of Rarity’s earlier suspicion was embarrassingly obvious in hindsight. Having never ventured into this part of the castle before, tonight had been her first chance to behold the double doors acting as the grand entrance to the Starswirl the Bearded wing of the library—but even yesterday she had known that the place was permanently off-limits to all except royalty and the noblest of nobles.

Someone, however, had clearly rewritten the rule book to suit their own dodgy motives, for the single piece of security that had repelled thieves and prying eyes for generations – a single yet extraordinarily powerful lock – lay mangled in a dark corner.

“I knew something was missing on this door!” Rarity exclaimed. “Now anypony can just stroll inside and learn some undoubtedly questionable magic!”

Rainbow Dash hoofed restlessly at the carpet, indecision diluting her desire for action. “Darn intruder! I’d barge in there right now and tackle their sorry flank into next week, but you’ve gotta think twice about taking on anything that managed to bust in there in the first place.”

Humming in agreement, Rarity tried not to shudder with nerves. “Making a scratch on this lock would require ten times more magical potency than I could ever summon, so the power one would have to wield in order to do this… You know, darling, I’m beginning to think that the perpetrator does not have a flank at all.”

Rainbow raised her eyebrows knowingly. “Are you thinking what I’m thinking?”

Eyes closed, Rarity nodded slowly. “I believe I am.” Even with her upper-class connections giving her a large number of suspects to mentally rift through, Rarity had already whittled them down to just one being who held the golden combination of means, motive and chaotic mind required to execute such a feat.

Still, there’s a fundamental problem with this line of thinking…

Rarity turned to Rainbow Dash in confusion. “The lock must have been smashed tonight, or somepony else would have noticed it before us. But this renders our theory similarly broken; Celestia will not have allowed him to sneak one filthy claw of his a single inch outside the Conference Room since the meeting began.”

Dash smiled grimly. “And what was he to that meeting? Late.”

If Rarity had been a judge, her hammer would have been falling to deliver Discord’s guilty verdict at that very moment. “…We must report this immediately. I fear to imagine what he has stolen…”

Unfortunately, this plan died almost as quickly as it had been conceived when a tremendous CRASH echoed from within the library.

Rarity and Rainbow Dash exchanged a wide-eyed, frozen look.

“Somepony is still in there!” Rarity whispered urgently. “We should hurry downstairs and inform Princess Celestia!”

But by the time she had finished talking, a smile had appeared on Rainbow Dash’s face that was filled with nothing but adventurous anticipation.

...Oh, Celestia save me, she’s going to charge in.

Suddenly regretting bringing Rainbow Dash back around to her bold, courageous self, Rarity laughed nervously and said, “Investigating would be a tad, um, hasty, don’t you agree? My…my hooficure, you understand…and… Well…danger, yes?”

Rainbow blinked.

Realising that cosmetic excuses were assets that Dash would sooner liquidate than accept, Rarity stopped babbling and whimpered her last, hopeful suggestion in unabashed fear. “Perhaps now is the time to hoof it with our tails between our legs?”

“What, and let some chubby night-guard reap all the glory? No way!” Dash lifted herself proudly upon her powerful hind legs and hopped combatively from one to the other, jabbing at an invisible opponent with her frontal hooves while flexing her wingspan. “Aww, yeah! Time for the great Rainbow Dash to add Epic Arrest of the Century to her already epic list of accomplishments!”

“B-But—”

“Come on, Rarity! Open the door and you can be my awesome assistant who uses her magic to make my lightning-fast moves of justice all flashy and stuff!”

I don’t want to die. I don’t want to die. I’m definitely going to die. Oh, but I can’t abandon her! I care for her too much! Calm… Calm… Come, now… Fortune favours the brave…

Rainbow’s expectant grin was the final nail in the coffin that Rarity sincerely hoped she wouldn’t be occupying by the end of the night.

Hoof trembling slightly, Rarity pushed open the heavy double doors, and they entered the forbidden library.
> Chapter 7 – The Perfectionist Vs. The Pendulum
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

The sponsor of Twilight Sparkle’s academic success was her own brilliant mind.

Its continued existence alone was considered a miracle among her friends. How it managed to sustain enough paths for her maze of racing thoughts to travel – all without them colliding and overwhelming even the alicorn’s immense cognitive process to a point of self-implosion – was indefinable.

But Twilight, who cherished such an analytically intimate relationship with her brain that she herself could acknowledge the intricacies of its specialness, lived in odd harmony with herself. In exchange for enduring the occasional mental collapse, which manifested through her fearsome, uncontrollable episodes of blind insanity, Twilight enjoyed and actively exercised supernatural abilities.

A mere shred of this talent was contributed by a seemingly omniscient memory, whose capacity enabled her to recite the entirety of a one-thousand-page book she had read two years ago. Such lifelong gifts like this far outweighed the price of her genius.

Yet now, for the first time since her extraordinary memory itself had begun keeping records, an infuriating bout of amnesia was reminding her only of why she feared that price.

“It’s no good, Fluttershy!” she huffed, finally plonking her rear to the ground after ten minutes of carrying it around with pacing hooves. “I just can’t remember anything after that!”

She and the canary pegasus sat in Ponyville Station, their backsides slowly baking against the hot stone of the platform bound for Manehattan via Canterlot. Despite lounging – or in Twilight’s case, sweating – in the midday sun for a good half-hour, they had not seen a single bit exchange hooves for a ticket thanks to a total absence of staff. Neither had they seen or heard any actual locomotives. No train had so much as roared past to buffet their manes, and a blank timetable made no effort to inform the locals when one might actually bother to arrive.

It was no consolation to Twilight that this did not matter anyway; Ponyville’s population itself seemed to be on strike, just the same as the trains that weren’t servicing it. Save for the omnipresent tumbleweed that Twilight’s imagination had watched skip past six times already, the entire establishment was deserted.

That’s not even the worst of it. Never mind that my hometown’s only station looks like it went bankrupt back in the pre-classical era—I don’t even know how I got here!

Restless in fragmented knowledge, Twilight rummaged through her most recent memories once more. “We were in Canterlot, in the castle,” she said, as though reaming off hazy images aloud to a friend would cement them in truth. “Shining was about to tell me something about Icon o’ Clast, but then Celestia interrupted and called us to the table. I sat down for the meeting like everypony else, and then…nothing! The rest is blank!”

Fluttershy sniffed sadly.

“How does that chain of events even begin to make sense?” Uncertainty aggravated Twilight to growl. “I mean, we took a train from this platform to get to Canterlot in the first place!”

If Fluttershy saw her point, she did not show it. With her only reassurance coming from an empty silence whose most optimistic feature was its inability to prove her wrong, Twilight’s mind resorted to surreal possibilities.

Was everything that happened in the castle all some crazy dream? It’s not often that a roomful of us meet in alliance with Discord, after all. But that still doesn’t explain why I’ve woken up in a suddenly derelict station with no recollection of arriving… Not to mention that Fluttershy’s been dumped here alongside me with exactly the same, weirded out memories. So what if this is the dream? GAH!

Her usually unblemished logic challenging reality itself was the last straw. Hoping that even Fluttershy’s muted voice might suffice to blot out the frenzied ones kicking her in the head, Twilight turned an exasperated face towards her friend. “I can’t remember anything!” she repeated helplessly.

“P-Please don’t shout, Twilight,” stammered Fluttershy as she flinched under both Twilight’s maddened eyes and her volume level. “You’re right, completely right. Sitting down is the last thing I remember, too.”

“I know, but you must be able to…” The unfair demand clogged in her throat. At the realisation of her hypocritical behaviour, Twilight uttered a mournful groan and let herself collapse flat-out onto the cooked concrete. “Oh, Fluttershy, I’m sorry… As if I haven’t wrecked our friendship enough already…”

Twilight indulged in a brooding silence. Pitying herself occupied a few, long seconds before an echo of Fluttershy’s words, which carried a subtle peculiarity, struck her with surprise. “You called me Twilight,” she said, tentative hope glowing faintly inside her. “You said my name instead of hailing me as a princess. And you’re not bowing to me or offering to be my eternal slave like you have been all week!”

Fluttershy’s nod was tiny, but it was the nervous smile which accompanied it that told Twilight she need not worry about the pegasus subjecting herself to such harmful submission again.

Progress at last!

Twilight desperately wanted to exploit this chink in Fluttershy’s relentless self-depreciation, but pushing further left her luck at risk of being pushed along with it. Having made a vital breakthrough, yet still treading on ice of indeterminate thickness, Twilight was unsure whether to linger around the subject—until her mind somewhat redeemed its recollection failure and made the decision for her.

Hang on. That nod of hers—why is it dunking me in déjà vu?

Then her memory circuit sparked. Scrambling up to stand, Twilight partially amended her incomplete timeline. “Wait! This stupid amnesia sets in just after we all sat down; you looked really upset, Fluttershy, so I mouthed across the table that I’d help you…” A bewilderingly unmissable opportunity to blow apart a week’s frustration of futilely probing Fluttershy plastered a grin to her face. “…And you nodded in consent!”

Though Fluttershy did not gasp as Twilight had expected, her glazed eyes conveyed no less shock as she recalled the moment. “I… I thanked you, didn’t I?” Her lip trembled. “Oh no… T-That was a mistake! I’m not ready!” Shaking her head as though trying to neutralise the nod, Fluttershy began to back away. “I’m not ready yet! P-Please don’t make me!”

Advancing on her friend’s retreating hooves would have been akin to entrusting her already slim chances to a drunken Discord, so Twilight ignored the instinct to launch her own hooves into pursuit and, instead, chose to simply place one over her heart. It was the same, sincere hoof that had won Fluttershy’s trust in Canterlot Castle. “Remember the conversation we had just before we entered the Conference Room? It was Luna’s idea, and I failed you. I let my bitterness at your insecurity around me rule my head, which meant that you were too scared to even admit that something was wrong. My selfishness dug us both into that horrible hole, and I can’t tell you how sorry I am for it.”

Fluttershy froze, one forehoof hovering in uncertainty of whether to complete its full journey backwards.

“But that wound can heal,” Twilight continued, not daring to move herself. “I’m your friend, Fluttershy, and there’s no reason to suffer in silence anymore. Please be brave; sharing a problem puts you in the strongest position to solve it.”

Fluttershy’s indecisive limb slowly lowered to the ground. Still quivering, she whimpered, “Twilight… I’m scared.”

This sounds serious. How can I get her to open up without holding a bunny rabbit hostage? Hmm. Maybe if I call upon a bit of give-and-take logic…?

Constructive ideas circulated through Twilight’s processes, improving and refining themselves until, in ten seconds flat, she had crafted a solution whereby everybody won. Her head, the architect of this answer, promptly told her what to say.

But nothing came out. For a moment, Twilight stared stupidly as she contemplated her involuntary silence. Then, helplessly, she felt the familiar, more indirect consequence of her brilliance ruin her.

Twilight could not speak; her heart had chosen this moment to suffer from its inferiority complex. It had been her secret since foalhood, the self-destructive condition that would stall or completely reject the delivery of whatever her brain scripted, particularly when the topic of discussion dwelled close to her heart. Orchestrated by emotional inexperience and stress, its social bane stood as the reason why she had only found solace in nurturing Spike during her lonely youth.

The affliction had never struck with such chokingly powerful symptoms before, but hindsight left Twilight wondering how she had not expected it—this time, the subject was both her heart and Spike intertwined.

She inhaled deeply.

“Fluttershy,” she managed, “I have a sensitive problem, too. If I confide in you, will you do the same with me?”

Instantly Fluttershy was by her side, sitting her down and rubbing a hoof which was clearly practised in the art of grooming across stiff pressures in her neck. “Something’s wrong? Then yes! I want to help you!”

“Thank you.” Twilight became aware that she was prioritising a heart to heart over their very safety; they remained clueless as to why they had awoken in Ponyville’s train station. But possible danger would not sway Twilight to ignore a troubled friend.

It feels stupid beyond belief, but waiting it out might just be best. We’re obviously here for some reason, so leaving straightaway would be redundant. Maybe somepony will show up. And passing up a chance to end Fluttershy’s secretive saga once and for all… Now that would be foolish.

Confident that her decision was well-founded, Twilight made to bind a fair agreement between herself and Fluttershy. “Just one thing, Fluttershy: that concern that you’re feeling for me is exactly what I feel for you. So you have to let me return the favour afterwards.” Though she knew that trying to stare down the Staremaster had fast tracked many a Cockatrice to endangerment, Twilight mustered her sternest look. “Promise me, Fluttershy.”

“…I promise.”



 
 
The predictable creak of unused oak made for a fitting sound to complement the wall of blackness that greeted Rarity and Rainbow Dash. The light from the corridor pervaded no more than three yards inside Starswirl the Bearded’s forbidden library, beyond which was darkness so absolute that Rarity wondered if Luna herself had enchanted the air in order to hide an artificial trap.

That loud crash from before: I doubt the intruder would have risked being so noisy even to get at something valuable. Something went wrong…

Rarity ventured forth a few steps more until she stood on the cusp of the invisible chasm in front of her. Intending to surprise and possibly corner their target, she immersed herself in magic and casted a quick blast of light that illuminated the entire chamber for about two seconds.

When the library had dimmed to its unnatural nothingness once more, Rarity found herself debating whether her eyes had fallen victim to wishful thinking that had skimmed the room for her. “Darling, did I deceive myself, or is there—?”

“Yes, I’m over here.” The stallion’s unsettlingly carefree voice echoed exactly from where Rarity had just seen a shape during the brief flash.  “Just having a quick rest on the floor. Don’t mind me.”

Strangely, his tone seemed plagued by fatigue and surrender, but Rarity was taking no chances. “I’m going to brighten the room more permanently,” she warned the downed pony. “Any attempt to escape will result in my friend Rainbow Dash here… How did you phrase it again, dear?”

“I’ll smash your sorry flank into next week!” Rainbow promised, body crouched low in preparation. “You got that, buster?”
“Next week, eh?” answered the darkness. “Heh… As if my efforts haven’t brought me far enough. But believe me, escape is the last thing on my mind.”

Ha! A likely story! Trying to buy time for yourself will earn you nothing but a sky-blue hoof to the face.

Rarity shut the doors to emphasise her distrust, managing to quell the literally blind panic that was threatening to suffocate her. Her claustrophobia soon lifted, however, as her horn fired a luminescent orb to where she estimated was the centre of the room.

There it hovered, able to bring enlightenment of the entire library to their eyes. But the stallion had told no lie; he remained near-motionless on the floor, chest heaving and visibly sweating. Indeed, he occupied a peculiarly central spot in the circular chamber, leaving him illuminated in startling fashion against the gradually dulling radius encompassing him.

Rainbow Dash approached quickly but cautiously. “Game’s up, loser! What are you, an idiot? I got caught breaking into a hospital once and even I didn’t lounge about in plain sight! Stand up and get ready for a thrashing!”

The stallion – whose odd lack of disguise revealed a large horn that proved him a unicorn – almost smiled, despite his response coming through short, sharp breaths. “Kinda difficult… Can’t move…” As Rarity stepped within touching distance, the intruder looked up with golden, dilated eyes. “Heavenly stars, you’re beauti—no. That isn’t helping.”

Neither the stoppered compliment nor his brilliant eyes prevented a fearsome scowl from forming on Rarity’s features. “Choose your next words very carefully,” she hissed.

“I’d rather put it bluntly,” panted the exhausted stallion. “I need your help. I need energy, to be precise.”

“Energy?” Rarity suddenly received an unpleasant premonition as to where this stranger was steering the conversation. “What are you insinuating?”

Some form of body language must have betrayed her guess, because the stallion immediately launched a defensive plea. “Look, I know that you probably see a pathetic thief who wants to swipe a collection of ancient scrolls for his own greedy benefit, but you would misunderstand. Ugh…” He paused for breath, wetting his dry lips. “Fair unicorn, please offer me a share of your strength; then I can explain without worrying about dying halfway through a sentence.”

“…You jest, surely.” Her fear had been unfortunately accurate. He was asking to be the recipient of a Splicer Spell, a relatively simple yet somewhat intimate piece of magic that allowed the exchange of both magical and physical vitality between unicorns.

But whichever this unicorn sought and for whatever reason, her disbelief at his sheer nerve had already sealed her decision. “Your proposal is laughable. And my name is Rarity, you common felon.”

A sour look crossed his face. “I implore you, Miss Rarity. Two possible outcomes face me if I am not supplied with any energy, and the most preferable ends in me becoming just another name in a graveyard.”

Rarity raised her chin. “I shall pretend I can fathom a set of circumstances that would justify that ridiculous claim,” she retorted. “You wish for me to overlook the fact that you are a criminal who begs life itself from upstanding citizens? Very well. I will consider it…when you admit your name and why you disregarded a simple restriction law.”

“Miss Rarity…your tongue reeks of sophistication.” His dry defeatism was relentless, and hoarse coughs suddenly spluttered from his mouth as if his body were punishing him for straying off-topic. “My name? You wouldn’t believe me if my lawyer made a case of proving it. And I think my lawyer is dead.”

“You’re gonna need a lawyer in a minute!” Dash spat, restraining him with a firm hoof planted upon his back. “Stop talking in riddles and start coughing up information instead of your guts!

“Darling, let me deal with this ruffian,” Rarity said calmly, her gaze never faltering from their glaring lock on the stallion. Through narrowed eyes, she asked, “Are you implying that we would recognise the name of whoever you would claim to be?”

“Attractive, assertive and astute?” The stallion managed a chuckle. “Your tactics are exceptional; I almost want to introduce myself. Yes, that is my implication. As for the reason why I snuck in here: well, I’m lying right underneath it.”

Reluctant to permit him a break from interrogation, Rarity chanced a look skywards.

Hm? Is that…?

Though a routine sight among famous libraries with a centrepiece to gloat, there was something a little too familiar about the lone book standing proudly atop the tall pedestal.

Then Rarity realised she knew its contents without glancing at a single word etched within.

It was no secret that Twilight’s coronation had come to pass thanks to her perfecting of Starswirl the Bearded’s unfinished spell of friendship. In his honour upon its completion, Twilight had requested the black book to be preserved inside his wing of the library. The population had been quick to favour this verdict, and it was said the legendary book now commanded an inescapable overview of the chamber.

They certainly were not wrong there. So he was after Twilight’s book all along!

Questions, however, were still thick in Rarity’s mind, and the first to win the fight to get out of her mouth was not a long one. “Why?”

“A few days ago, I heard that a new princess was recently crowned because she completed a friendship spell,” wheezed the stallion with unsettling patience. “Loathe as I am to admit it, friends have always been something of a four-leaf clover in my life…and the ones I did make blew away about as easily. So I wanted to speed-read the book. Pick up a few tips. Then put it back.” A short silence draped dubiousness over his last statement. “…Possibly steal it.”

“Pig!” Stomping hard, Rainbow Dash kept the pressure on both his back and his precarious chances of receiving any kind of help. “You heard that Twilight wrote the spell a few days ago?” She snorted at his ignorance. “You must be a hermit or something; everypony knew that about a week back!”

“Forgive me,” responded the stallion flatly. “I’m sort of new around here.”

New? But he just said—aha! A gaping hole has opened within his story!

“You weave a convincing tale,” Rarity said, already looking forward to breaking his lies through logic, “but I’m afraid that remark has doomed you. You are ‘new’ around here, correct? Yet, mere moments ago, you claimed to live in such fame that your name alone would reveal to us everything about your identity.” Her smile told of blatant fakery. “The contradiction speaks for itself, I think.”

“…What an unfortunately valid point. This sort of coincidental misunderstanding is typical of my luck.”

Bending down to feed a threat directly into his ear, Rainbow Dash hissed in terrifying seriousness. “Misunderstanding? I don’t think so. Listen, you runt. I hate liars, and you don’t want me as your enemy. Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t beat the truth out of you right now.”

“Because everything I have said is true!” shouted the stallion with impressive conviction, making Rainbow jolt back in surprise. After a fit of coughs rewarded his momentary loss of patience, he choked, “You want to make a game of this? Then I see your contradiction, and I raise you with this question: how did I gain entry to this forbidden library at all?”

“Easy!” taunted Rainbow Dash. “Discord busted the lock with his abra-kadabra rubbish, and now you’re snooping around to steal Twilight’s book!”

“Precisely,” Rarity agreed with a shrug of finality. “You are Discord’s accomplice.”

“What?!” So animated was the stallion’s outburst that he wriggled with laughter underneath the hoof gluing him to the carpet. “Now you are the jester, Miss Rarity! I hate that manipulative freak! No, I busted the lock with my abra-kadabra rubbish. Why do you think I’m so knackered?”

“Because…” Rarity bit her lip, her inability to prove that events unfolded otherwise giving her opponent’s tide a palpable nudge.

“I managed to force my way inside,” the stallion went on, “but what I didn’t count on is this book of friendship having an extra layer of protection: a magical shield that I tried to destroy. Shattering that damnable lock had already drained a dangerous amount of my energy, so I knew it was all or nothing…and I failed. My offensive spell ricocheted off the barrier and destroyed that shelf over there.”

He gestured lazily to his left, where a former row of scrolls on shapeshifting now did not teach the mind with wisdom so much as attack the nose with the acrid smell of singed paper.

Rarity conceded a small nod. “Well, that explains the tremendous crash from before.”

“So you’re not pals with Discord?” Rainbow Dash pressed. “You managed to mangle the lock all by your sorry little self?”

“I swear it. I have met the fiend on numerous occasions, but working with him? I’d rather make a soufflé out of my own mane!”

He knows Discord personally? And the gaps in his story—they would all be patched if…!

An idea – a ridiculous, laughable idea as to the identity of the mystery pony – bounced around Rarity’s head, vying for acknowledgement. She dismissed it. Not only did the very room within which she stood teach that the single direction possible in time travel was backwards, but this stallion packed his speech with satirical banter that Rarity could not imagine ponies of old having employed at all.

Deciding to induce the matter into dormancy for the time being, Rarity moved on to what she thought would be an unrelated question. “So why are you only interested in Twilight’s spell? My imagination must stretch into surrealism to picture that you would not take a fancy to as many other powerful spells as you could carry.”

The stallion was clearly past elaborate evocations by this point, for he answered only, “Because I know what is written inside every other book and upon every other scroll in this room.”

The suspicion which Rarity had disregarded moments before tore to the front of her mind with a vengeance.

No! It can’t be! He can’t be! I won’t believe it! I need more evidence!

Before she could invent a question that might indirectly prompt him to unveil more about his past, Rainbow Dash had latched onto another issue. “Wait a sec. You’re lying on the ground underneath my epic hoof of justice, but you’re more tired than when we found your pathetic flank! How is that possible, you sneaky turd? Why are you still losing energy?”

“Your surprise is…surprising,” answered the unicorn raggedly, his remaining strength visibly ebbing. “I did tell you that I’m basically dying here. Unless you look past your distrust and help me, I don’t have long…”

“That doesn’t answer the question!”

Their captive had not opened his dry mouth to answer again before Rarity spoke for him. “You’re casting spells even as we speak, aren’t you?” she stated more than asked, confident that her magical instincts were not misleading her. “Permanent spells. Ever since we came in, I have sensed a powerful aura of magic originating from you.”

“Ah, Miss Rarity,” wheezed the stallion weakly. “It’s as if you have known me for years. But I can only wish to have a friend such as you…” A humourless chuckle escaped him. “Yes, I am casting two long-term spells at this very moment.”

“And they are?” demanded Rainbow Dash, her hoof placing virtually all her body weight upon his back.

The stallion could barely utter a word anymore without ripping the air with heavy gasps as his struggling lungs sucked at whatever their damaged capacity could hold. “One is to disguise myself… An age spell… I am much older than I appear…”

Rainbow Dash looked on the verge of an anticipation meltdown. “And the other?!”

“The other has been accompanying me for days… Can’t let go…or else…”

The stallion collapsed. His head struck the floor as his horn suddenly began expelling enormous bursts of red light, and Rarity recognised the frightening symptom of fatal exhaustion in a unicorn. These makeshift fireworks which sacrificed what little energy he had left were beyond the stallion’s control, acting merely as nature’s distress flare in a final, instinctive cry for help.

With his eyes clamped shut, the unicorn was not gifted a quick welcome into unconsciousness and he flailed about in terrible discomfort. The red eruptions from his horn soon devolved into pathetic sparks of black discharge, and Rarity watched in utter horror while the stallion whispered things inaudible, things that she just knew were his final peace-makings.

It was late, but Rarity felt reality arrive.

I’m watching somepony die.

A feeling as unidentifiable as the stallion gripped her, and the command to prolong his life reverberated inside her head so forcefully that she could not have ignored its will if she herself had been unconscious. 

On the most meaningful whim of her life, Rarity touched her horn to his and commenced the Splicer Spell.

“What the heck are you doing?!” yelled Rainbow Dash. “We can’t give him the power to do whatever he wants! He’ll just teleport away!”

“And I cannot watch a fellow unicorn take his last breath when I can save him!” A flash of alabaster white signalled the transportation of enough energy to sustain him for perhaps an hour, but the exertion was unprecedented; Rarity staggered sideways as a sizeable chunk of vitality abandoned her body.

Good grief! I know an age spell is complex and consuming, but even so… What in the name of Equestria is the other spell he has active?

Then he stilled. The intense, panicked atmosphere caused by looming death eased, and Rarity’s heart slowed in sync with the stallion’s once ragged gasping. Beside her, Rainbow Dash seemed to have grudgingly accepted her actions as a necessity, and she relented as her hoof finally lifted from its role of imprisoning him.

“Y-You saved me,” the unicorn managed, so emotionally charged that his voice rang with sincerity for the first time. After standing to his full height, he bowed deeply. “Thank you, Miss Rarity!”

She nodded, a small smile inexplicably curling her mouth. “That should keep you in full health for another hour or thereabouts. But how do you intend to spend it? You surely understand that we cannot just let you go.”

Returning a much wider smile, the stallion spoke now with purpose. “Of course. My mind is made up. Please, take me to Princess Celestia. We have a history together, and shame stopped me from consulting with her first… But I’m not afraid anymore. I know that she will arrange to keep me alive and well.”

Rarity could see no flaw in his proposal until Rainbow Dash pointed out what the hectic events of the past half-hour had made her forgotten. “Uh, that’s a nice, lovey-dovey sentiment and all, but Celestia is kinda in the middle of something important at the minute, and—” Rainbow cocked her head as a realisation hit her. “Hang on… Rarity, so are we! We should be downstairs in the Conference Room right now hearing why the hay Twilight and Fluttershy went AWOL on us!”

Muddled thoughts had Rarity blinking several times in surprise, her head making a botched attempt at comprehending the number of strange happenings that had swooped upon them in a single evening. “You’re quite right, darling,” she replied slowly.

“So what do we do with Krakatoa here in the meantime?”

“I could wait outside until your business concludes,” offered the stallion after a warm chuckle. “Well, until I feel like I’m going to throw up again, at least.”

Uncertainty of how much trust she could afford to yield was still troubling Rarity. “I hope our fragile truce will not fracture while we finish our meeting. Because if you were to wander off—”

“Then my death certificate will be signed before you go to bed,” interrupted the stallion, motioning at Rarity’s horn. “You were gracious enough to keep my cylinders running for a bit longer, but gambling with my life again would redefine insanity. A second chance is my only hope now, and by running away I would simply be distancing myself from being granted one.”

Rarity thought she saw reminiscent pain flash in his eyes for the second she spent considering how to respond. “And you think that Princess Celestia will grant it to you?”

“Yes. I… I miss her. Call me clichéd, but she was the only one who ever understood me.” He made no attempt to hide another bout of glumness as a heavy sigh drew itself from his lips. “I miss everything about my old life. What I wouldn’t give just to hear Celestia crack her light but indulgent sense of humour one more time…”

His surprising accuracy of Celestia’s character encouraged some belief to settle inside Rarity. A twinge of sympathy, however, was tempting a potentially dangerous lull in her awareness, so she scrapped the atmosphere before it could develop. “Have it your way, criminal stallion. Come, Rainbow darling. We are escorting our mystery guest from this creepy place.”

When the three of them were bathed in the safe light of the corridor, Rarity extinguished her luminous orb and shut the double doors in a second din of creaking. She had no plans, however, to reinstall the compromised security. “The royal sisters enforce the lock, don’t they?” She sighed, looking pitifully at the ruined mechanism. “We shall have to report this to them.”

Rainbow Dash chuckled. “Yup, along with some strong advice of thwacking on a few extra features. …Hey, wait up!”

The stallion was already trotting down the corridor at a brisk speed, and Rarity had difficulty keeping apace while simultaneously retaining her mane’s flawless curls.

The unreliable light inside the library had left Rarity unsure whether her eyes were properly distinguishing the stallion’s colour and specific features, but with his form now in full view, she could see that her first impressions had been spot on.

Both his body and his mane were a deep blue, the matching pair doing a fair job of complementing his golden eyes. His cutie mark was unspectacular, but looking at it stirred implacable familiarity within her.

Rarity would not have praised him so highly as handsome, but he wielded an odd, almost accidental charm that was still making Rarity doubt her educated guess towards his identity.

My stab in the dark seemed comical at first, but everything he says solidifies the theory with more and more plausibility. I must find out if I am correct!

“You were about to inform us of the second spell you are constantly casting,” she reminded him as their hooves tapped out a pleasing rhythm upon the carpet. “I don’t think I need to tell you that the amount of energy I sacrificed for you was, to be frank, ridiculous. Your gratitude is all well and good, but I would like to know which spell is working alongside your age spell.”

Although his hooves never stopped travelling, the stallion paused to consider his answer. Eventually, with each word carefully chewed, he admitted, “If I had ceased that second spell, I wouldn’t have been at risk of dying. Instead, a fate far worse would have awaited me: being dragged back home, where my only companions in life are loneliness and misery.”

Unadulterated disbelief took hold on Rainbow Dash’s face. “What? You chose death over another shot at making friends? It doesn’t matter how bad things are at the moment, you idiot! As long as you’re hanging out with the living, there’s always a chance to find somepony who’ll understand! Rarity reminded me of that about fifteen minutes ago! In a toilet!”

Oh, Rainbow Dash… That tough exterior hides a mare who has so much love to give.

The still-nameless stallion deigned not to challenge the pegasus, nor agree. He arrived at the floor from which Rarity had departed – the floor that hosted the Conference Room – and the bottom of the stairs reflected the state of Rarity’s patience. “Halt! That is enough. I did not wish for it to come to this, but your cryptic nonsense is forcing my ultimatum. Say your name, stallion, clearly and simply, or else I shall withdraw my contribution of my Splicer Spell.”

He froze, his back to the both of them. “…You drive a hard bargain, Miss Rarity.”

Turning to face her, the stallion wore a reminiscent expression and chuckled as he proclaimed, “What a night! It’s not often one gets caught in such a mixed web of activities over the course of just a couple of hours. I mean, breaking into my own library; accidentally blowing up an entire shelf of my own work; being saved from either certain death or my own past by a unicorn who is way out of my league; and then being denied the chance to read a life-saving book, half of which I authored myself, by that same beautiful unicorn…” He laughed again. “I suppose this is karma for being such a secretive perfectionist. For failing to write down or share the secrets of time travelling into the future with anypony else.”

“Then it’s true!” gasped Rarity, her second hunch of the night having been proven right on the trot. “The other spell: it’s time travel! You’re him! From the past! You’re…!”

“Whatshisname the Bearded!” Rainbow finished, somehow unable to recall the household name whose famous library they had just trespassed.

The beardless pony smiled. “Please, if you don’t mind, it’s just Starswirl now.”