> My Girl Fluttershy > by White_Cloud > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- > Chapter 1: Our First Encounter > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Fluttershy. Every time I say that word it makes my heart beat faster and causes a smile to break out onto my face. She is the most beautiful mare I have ever set my eyes on. Her flowing pink mane is like a cascading waterfall slowly drifting down her head. Her eyes glow like two shimmering sapphires in the night. Her wings are so beautiful and strong. She is the one pony that brings so much joy to my life whenever I catch just a glimpse of her. She is so kind, caring, and compassionate to every pony that she meets. I stare at her every day and long to hold her. I long to gently whisper in her ear how much I love her and to fall asleep every night with her next to me. I dream about her every night, how our lives could be together. I dream about starting a family with her and raising two foals together. But there is one problem with this dream; I can’t talk to her. Even though I believe that she is the one pony I am destined to spend the rest of my life with, I keep my feelings bottled up inside. Anytime that I start to think about going up to her and say hello, I want to just run back to my house and hide. It’s not that I am a bad looking stallion. But there are things that haunt me and suppress my need to talk to her, things that I fear and will haunt me forever. So here I am…alone. But let me reassure you dear reader, though my story may be long and winding, there is a happy ending. The journey to get there though is not a joyful one; it is fraught with sadness, betrayal, and loneliness. But I believe it is a journey well worth telling. Let me start back about 10 years ago. I remember that day well for it was the day that I had my first contact with Fluttershy, and the day my life would change forever. …… The story begins as many stories do, with the dawning of a new day. The sun was just beginning to rise in the east as all of the ponies in Equestria began to wake from their slumber and begin their days. I rubbed my eyes and lay in my bed, thinking about the wonderful dream I had just woken from. It was another of my Fluttershy dreams, and it was one of my favorites. We had taken the family out to Sweet Apple Acres to go apple picking, and to enjoy the wonderful cider that the Apple family produced. Cider season was one of the best seasons in my opinion, and this season had been especially delicious. I had woken just as I was about to enjoy my second cup of cider. As I rolled over and forced myself to get out of bed, the dream kept playing over and over in my head. I trotted over to my mirror and looked at myself, thinking that I really needed a haircut. My mane was beginning to look rather shaggy. I was not a bad looking stallion. My mane and tail were both a dark brown color, and my coat was a light brown. My eyes were an emerald green, and my mane was usually cut short. I preferred a shorter mane since my job required me to usually be outside for long lengths of time. I was the Head Gardener for the town of Ponyville, and it was the best job I could have ever dreamed for. As I turned away from the mirror and began to make my way into the kitchen, I looked out the window and smiled. The sun was just beginning to peak its bright head over the mountains, casting its warm glow over all of Equestria. It was a quiet morning, just the way I liked it. My life was one of peace and quiet since I lived in the country outside of Ponyville. I liked the quiet and the smells that were always present. The smell of growing plants and flowers was so wonderful to me, and it was always a great way to start the day. After I ate my breakfast, I began to prepare to make my daily journey to Ponyville. I loaded up my saddle bags with a few odds and ends, and then set out along the lane towards the town. The walk from my little house to Ponyville was always invigorating. It was a great way to enjoy the countryside and breathe in the scents of the land. The trot was not a long one, and I soon spotted the first roof tops of the town. As I neared the first buildings, the traffic on the lane began to steadily grow. Many of the ponies were heading to their daily jobs or heading off to some unknown errand. I never spoke to them since I was a very quiet pony. I had a difficult time trying to talk to new people, so I preferred to just keep to myself. Every once in a while some pony would call my name and I would greet them. I really didn’t have any friends, but that was fine with me. I reached my toolshed and picked up what tools I needed to complete my tasks for the day. Some of the plants in the courtyard were beginning to look a little wilted, and I needed to replace them with some fresh flowers I had grown in my greenhouse. Once I had what I needed, I headed into the crowds of Ponyville to make my way to my first stop. Once I reached my destination, I got down and began to get to work. I dug up the wilted flowers and began to replace them with the colorful new flowers. That was when I spotted her. At first all I caught a glimpse of was the bright pink color of her mane, but there was no mistaking who the pony was. Fluttershy was trotting through the town center, stopping at the vegetable cart to pick up some fresh carrots and tomatoes. I followed her as she trotted up to the cart and began to fill her saddlebags with the food, never looking away. My heart was beating so fast and my body was trembling. She looked so beautiful, the way her mane fell down her head and her curly tail that was just as gorgeous as her mane. She pulled a few bits from her bag and laid them on the cart. She gave the vendor a smile that made me smile and feel so happy inside. I longed to talk to her, to say anything to her. I wanted so desperately to tell her how I felt, but I knew I wasn’t brave enough. As she turned and began to head around the square once more, I quickly lowered my head and began to work the ground again. I would quickly lift my head and see where she was every few moments, but then I would lower it again for fear she would see me staring at her. After a few moments, I dared to look back up, but I froze when I saw her. She was heading towards me and she had a smile on her face. I began to shake as I my mind began to race. Where is she going? Is she coming to talk to me? Oh no, what do I do? I began to frantically dig up the dirt to replant new flowers, but I felt a presence behind me. “Um, excuse me?” No, it’s her. I…I can’t do this. “Excuse me? I had something I wanted to, um, tell you.” I couldn’t move, she was talking to me! But my mind was blank and my mouth would not make any sounds. “I don’t mean to bother you, but I love your flowers.” You are blowing this! “I’m sorry, I’ve bothered you.” I heard her begin to trot away as my mind finally snapped back. I quickly turned around, trying to catch her. But she was already lost in the crowd. I mentally kicked myself. Stupid, she was right here! You could have said something! Anything! I was so upset at myself. How could I have missed such a golden opportunity when it was right here? I had become so depressed, I knew it was useless to try and complete my tasks for today. I slowly packed up all of my tools and headed back to my shed. I grabbed my saddle bags and began the walk back to my house, fuming with each step I took. You are so stupid! She was right there, and you blew it! I soon reached my house and threw my bags on my bedroom floor. I laid down on the bed, burying my head in a pillow as I continued to kick myself. I feared that was my only time she would ever speak to me. I rolled over and looked at my ceiling as I closed my eyes, still angry. She was right there… > Chapter 2: Flutter Me Away > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- The next morning brought no comfort as I lay in my bed, trying to figure out some way to weasel myself out of this predicament. On the one hoof, I wanted desperately to tell Fluttershy how much I loved her. But on the other hoof, well, let’s just say there were some things that I was not proud of and wanted to keep hidden from everypony. I finally drug myself out of bed and trotted over to my bedroom window as I let out a heavy sigh. Come on White Cloud, you can do this. You love her don’t you? Yes, I loved her. But what if she rejected me? You can’t think like that Cloud. You have to put your past behind you and think about here and now. I let out another sigh as I tried to think of some reason why I shouldn’t go and talk to her. But every excuse I came up with was not enough to change my thoughts. After a few minutes of thinking, I finally gave in. It was time to confront Fluttershy and tell her how I felt. Shaking nervously, I headed outside and down the lane towards Ponyville, in search of my destiny. …… When I finally reached the outskirts of town, it took everything I had in me to not bolt back to my house. I knew that if I didn’t do this now, I would never get another chance. I feared I had already missed my opportunity yesterday when she talked to me, but I hoped that fate would smile on me and grant me another opportunity. Shaking even more than I was before, I trotted into the square and began to look for her. Brushing my way past many ponies as they went about their daily lives, I looked everywhere I could think of. I looked in Sugar Cube Corner, by the produce cart, the scroll and quill shop, even the flower shop, but I saw no sign of her. I began to grow more and more scared as I continued to fail to spot her. The urge to rush back home grew stronger and stronger the longer I kept looking. Finally, I decided she wasn’t in town today, and knew that I truly had blown it. With my head hung low, I trotted over to the café to drown my disappointment with some food. Maybe if I could eat enough, then maybe I would be able to forget about her. The waiter trotted over and took my order, and then I laid my head on the table, continuing to rebuke myself. It’s all over. You had your shot yesterday, and you blew it. You are never going to see her again. I heard a plate with my sandwich being set down on the table, but I really was not hungry. I poked at it with my hoof, feeling rather sick to my stomach. Finally, I broke down and picked up the sandwich and was about to bite into it, when I heard a voice that stopped me. No…it couldn’t be. “Thank you so much Zecora! This medicine will help Angel get better much quicker.” I heard another pony speak, but I couldn’t make out what she said. Then I heard that sweet voice speak again. “I will. Thank you!” It was much closer this time. I began to scan the square, hoping to just catch a glimpse of her. All of a sudden, there was a break in the crowd, and there she was. Sweet Celestia, she was so beautiful. Her mane flowed from her head like a cascading pink waterfall. Her eyes were the most beautiful shade of blue I had ever seen. Her tail was the same color as her mane and curled around in the most beautiful way. Fluttershy, she was here. She began to turn my way, and I quickly turned back around, hoping she didn’t see me staring at her. What do I do now? My heart feels like it is going to beat out of my chest. Should I talk to her? No…that went badly last time she talked to us. Maybe just go say hello? Arrgh! I don’t know what to do! As I continued to argue with myself, I didn’t notice that she had made her way over to the café. I was too busy trying to figure out some way to talk to her without seeming odd or creepy, when I heard the last voice I wanted to hear at this moment. And it was right next to me. “Ummm, excuse me. I don’t want to bother you, but could I share this table with you? There are no available tables.” Oh Celestia, what do I do now? Oh…Celestia…Arrgh! Pull yourself together White Cloud! Say yes! Say anything! “I’m sorry to have bothered you. I’ll find another table.” SAY SOMETHING!!! “Excuse me miss, but you can share my table.” Another pony pulled out a chair at his table and Fluttershy smiled at him as she sat down. “Oh, thank you! I needed to get off my hooves. I have been so busy today.” At this point, I was yelling at myself. YOU IDIOT! You did it again! You have got to be the stupidest pony in all of Equestria! How could you let her walk away, again! After everything that happened yesterday! This is it, it’s all over. You had two chances and you blew both of them. Good work White Cloud. I laid my head on the table once more as my brain continued to berate me. There was no way I was going to eat now. I got up and began to make my way home. There was nothing left for me here today, I failed in my mission. I rounded a corner and headed between two houses, not wanting to trot through the square and have somepony see me cry. I stopped as the tears began to flow down my face, when I heard a familiar voice. “Excuse me, sir. Y-You left this behind.” Great…just the pony I want to see me crying. How can this day get any worse? I turned around, and there she was. On the ground was my saddlebag. In all my sorrow, I had forgotten to grab it off of the table when I began to head home. I looked at her, and she quickly looked away, blushing. “I…I saw you had forgotten this, and I thought it might be important.” I stood looking at her, puzzled. Why would she still be nice to me? I basically ignored her twice. Why is she still talking to me? I slowly trotted over, picked it up, and placed it on my back. I didn’t really know what to say. “Th-thank you.” I was so nervous. We stood like this for a minute; the silence was deafening. Finally she spoke again. “M-my name is F-Fluttershy. I was the one w-who talked to you yesterday.” My mind couldn’t seem to form words to respond to her. “I really love your f-flowers. They are very beautiful.” Now it was my turn to look away and blush. I knew she liked my flowers, but to hear her actually tell me face to face how much she loved them was a whole other level. When I was finally able to look at her again, she was staring at me. I almost bolted when I stared into those eyes. They were so kind and gentle. She looked down at the ground and continued. “I’m going to head back.” She turned around and began to trot back towards the square. Finally, my mind was able to clear itself long enough to yell out, “Wait!” She stopped and I slowly trotted over to her. She turned around as I cleared my throat. “My name is White Cloud.” Then she did the most unexpected thing. She smiled. “It’s good to meet you.” > Chapter 3: One Small Step for a Pony… > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- She is so beautiful… I thought to myself as I stared at Fluttershy performing some errands around Ponyville. Ever since our small interaction yesterday, I had been unable to get her out of my head. Previously, she would only invade my dreams, but now she consumed my every waking thought. I smiled as I watched her going about buying vegetables or stopping in the quill shop to pick up some paper and ink. I found myself becoming more intrigued with this mare than I had ever been before. I never realized how deep my feelings for her had become. How I wanted to spend my every waking moment just staring at her or lie in a field and look up at the stars. I imagined the conversations we would have. I would make her laugh when I told a funny joke. She would smile as she told me about her day and everything she had accomplished. I shook my head and went back to the flower bed I was supposed to be tending, but I just could not help myself as I paused once more to watch her. So beautiful… …… The next day was a day off for me. I was very much looking forward to this day because during the night I had finally made up my mind to ask Fluttershy to a picnic. Sleep eluded me as I paced back and forth in my house trying to figure out what I was going to say to her. “Hi! Do you remember me? I had forgotten my bag at the café and you… No no no, that’s not right!” I cleared my throat and tried again. “Hi there! I’m White Cloud! Remember me from the café? You returned my bag and…” I sighed as I flopped into my favorite chair next to the fireplace. “Oh this is hopeless. I’m just too nervous to come up with anything good to say.” I sat and stared at the brightly colored fire, trying to figure out something that was perfect to say to the mare of my dreams. I laid my head back and closed my eyes, slowly rubbing the sides of my head with my hooves. I could feel a headache approaching, but I wasn’t about to let my pain get in the way of thinking about tomorrow. I slowly got up and walked into the kitchen to prepare for tomorrow. Opening up cupboards and the ice chest, I began to gather together the necessary ingredients to prepare a wonderful picnic. I wanted it to be simple, but simple didn’t have to mean bland and boring. I grabbed my saddlebags as I began to place the necessary picnic necessities into the pouches. I carefully put together a couple grass and bean sprout sandwiches, threw in some sliced apples and carrot sticks, as well as some cookies for dessert. To top it all off, I placed a blanket into the other side and then snapped the pouches closed. Smiling to myself, I began to grow more excited as I saw that the sun was beginning to rise over Equestria. But my head started to have small doubt creep in as my smile began to slowly fade and butterflies took over in my stomach. You can do this, White Cloud. I know you can do this! Sliding my saddlebags onto my back, I walked out of the house and headed towards Ponyville. It was a beautiful day as the birds sang their tune and squirrels ran up and down trees gathering acorns and nuts. I heard a dog barking and saw beautiful butterflies dancing among the flowers as I trotted down the lane. I loved this time of year. Spring was always the best season, in my opinion; all the colors and new plants, the blooming flowers and the trees regrowing their lost coverings. The sights and smells of spring were all around as I breathed in deeply the scent of the flowers and trees. It was intoxicating. At the same time, it helped calm me down a little. I picked up the pace a little as I neared the edge of the town. Even though it was still early morning, the town was already full of ponies going about their business. I trotted around the square, avoiding ponies and carts as I searched for Fluttershy. After a little time had passed, I realized it was a futile effort to try and find her right now. The town was too crowded and the noise was deafening. By this time, the sun had reached its peak and it was turning into a hotter day than was usual for this time of year. I noticed I was by Sugar Cube Corner, and the sudden urge to drink a milkshake came over me. The Cakes made the best milkshakes I had ever tasted. I walked through the door, and into a whole new level of chaos. There were boxes piled everywhere and ponies talking back and forth rapidly as they rushed around behind the counter. “Oh my, I think I forgot the cakes. Where did I put those?” “They’re right here, honey. All boxed up and ready to go. Ok, we still need four dozen doughnuts and five dozen cookies and tarts to pack before we can leave.” “Oh! I didn’t realize what time it is! We’re going to be late!” I walked over to the counter and watched Mr. and Mrs. Cake dash about the shop grabbing goodies from shelves and under the counters. “Hello Mr. Mrs. Cake!” “Oh, hello White Cloud! Sorry the place is in such a mess. We have a huge order we need to fill and get delivered to Canterlot. Big party going on there and we were asked to cater the entire event.” Mr. Cake never skipped a beat as he continued to pack boxes and stack them up. “Can I lend a hoof here? Seems like you could use all the help you can get.” “Oh, that would be wonderful dear. It would help us out so much if you were willing to do that. Why don’t you start taking these boxes out to our wagon.” Mrs. Cake pointed towards a tower of boxes that appeared to be on the verge of toppling over. I removed my saddlebags and set them in a corner as I slowly picked up a stack of desserts and trotted them out the door. It wasn’t long before all the boxes were stacked and secured in the wagon and the Cakes were waving goodbye as they headed out of Ponyville. I smiled as I waved and then wiped the sweat from my forehead. I trotted back into the shop and looked around to see if there was anything else that might have been forgotten or that needed to be put away. Sure enough, there was a pile of empty cake boxes that had been left on the counter. I picked up the boxes and started to trot into the back room when I heard a small noise. I set the boxes onto the nearest counter as a puzzled look came over my face. I thought everypony was gone. Is there somepony else here that I didn’t know about? As quietly as I could, I slowly began to make my way into the back room. Shaking a little as I looked about, I heard the noise again, unmistakable this time. “Hello? Is somepony here?” “YIPE!” I heard somepony scream and then the crashing of pots and pans hitting the floor reached my ears. I heard soft groaning as I rushed in to see a pile of pots and pans moving around on the floor. I realized they had fallen onto somepony! The pile grew taller as however it was under the pile of metal sat up. As the pots and pans fell around them, I saw the color pink. My heart skipped a beat as my mind started racing. Is it her? Could it really be her? As the last of the pots fell around her, the yellow color of her body was unmistakable. Her face was still hidden because a rather large pot had fallen onto her head. She cautiously lifted up the lid of the pot and then let out a little shriek as she dropped it back down over her head. “W-who are y-you?” I couldn’t help but giggle a little at the way she looked. It was just so funny seeing a Pegasus with a pot over her head. I finally settled down enough to where I could speak. “It’s me…White Cloud. We met on the side street behind the café?” “Wh-White Cloud?” I could tell she was still shaken, whether that was from the falling pots of the shock of me standing here. “Oh! White Cloud! I-I do remember you! You forgot your s-saddlebags and I gave them b-back to you.” I started to laugh again as I continued to stare at her. “Heh, I think you have something on your head.” “Oh my!” Fluttershy once again slowly lifted the pot up and then off her head. Her face was in the state of confusion and terror as she looked around at the mess. “You s-scared me, I thought e-everypony had left. The Cakes were so b-busy when I came in that I offered to h-help them, and then I told them that I would clean up back here. Now look at the mess I m-made.” She looked at the ground as tears began to roll down her face. I felt so bad for her that there was only one thing I could do. “Would you like a hoof cleaning up in here?” I smiled at her as I stretched out a hoof towards her. Sniffling, she looked up at me with eyes full of joy. “Oh, that would be wonderful! Thank you!” She grabbed my hoof as I helped her stand up. As we began to pick up the pots and pans and put them back into their homes, I kept watching her as she moved around, no, glided around the room. She was so graceful and mesmerizing. After a short time, all of the dishes were cleaned and put away and the cookware was stowed away in the cupboards. As I put the last pan into the cupboard, I turned around and looked at her. She wore a small smile on her face as she came over. “Thank you so much White Cloud!” I smiled back at her. Seeing her in this state made my heart soar! “I guess I should be heading back home.” It was then I remember my original purpose for being here. “I, um, had a question for you.” I slowly started to say. Fluttershy stopped and turned back around. “What is it White Cloud?” “Well, I was wondering if…oh, can I really do this? If, you would like to join me for a, um, picnic?” It was pure torture trying to get that out and my legs felt like they were going to collapse. Fluttershy looked puzzled as she stared at me. “White Cloud…I…” It took her a moment to be able to form words. I could see her mind wrestling with what I had asked her. Finally, she seemed to come to a conclusion. “I would love to Cloud.” She once again smiled at me as she trotted back. “When did you want to go?” “I was thinking, maybe, right now? I went ahead and packed everything last night.” Fluttershy looked a little shocked, but that soon faded into another smile. “Right now sounds perfect Cloud.” > Chapter 4: The Dance of Two Ponies > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- We headed out of Ponyville towards the spot I had planned for our little rendezvous. In my search to find the perfect spot, I had stumbled upon a hill that gave a glorious view of Equestria. Flowing rivers, forest tops, and majestic snowcapped mountains, this view had it all. What made it all the more special was when the sun was setting, the colors in the sky were so crystal clear they reflected off of the rivers making a shining spectacle too beautiful for words. This is perfect! I smiled as I imagined her reaction when we got there. “What is it Cloud?” Fluttershy asked as we continued down the lane. I didn’t even notice she had seen the smile that had crept onto my face. “It’s nothing.” We continued along the lane for a while as we began the slow climb to the top of a hill. At the top was the prize I sought, and where I hoped to tell Fluttershy my feelings for her. As we crested the top, I grinned as she reacted just as I thought she would. Her eyes lit up in amazement as she took in all of the wonder that was laid out in front of her. I had timed our trip so that we arrived just as the sun was beginning to touch the horizon. The sky was full of pinks, reds, and yellows that reflected off of the few scattered clouds that were present. The water was clear and reflected the sky in almost a perfect mirror. The sun glinted off of the snow making it shine like a jewel-encrusted crown. I slowly trotted over to her side as she continued to marvel at the scene. “Do you like it?” She turned to me and looked into my eyes. “It’s perfect.” …… We got the blanket flattened out and then I laid out the food I had prepared. “I hope you like grass and bean sprout sandwiches.” Fluttershy picked up one the sandwiches and took a small bite. “This is delicious! I have never had a sandwich quite like this before. Did you do something special to it?” A sly look came over my face as I leaned towards her. “I could tell you, but then I’d have to kill you!” I raised my hooves and made a spooky noise that sent her into a fit of laughter. I started to giggle as I picked up the other sandwich and took a bite. We sat there looking at the scenery as the sun continued its slow descent. Soon it would be dark, and that was when I had decided to tell her how I felt. Underneath the moon and stars, Fluttershy was going to hear what I had been longing to tell her. However, before that was going to happen, I had a burning question that I needed to have answered; one that had been on my mind since we started down this road. Before I could tell her what I longed for her to hear, she spoke once more. “You know White Cloud, I see you around town all the time; working in the flowerbeds, tending to the bushes and trees. But I have been curious about your, um, cutie mark. I noticed it is a dark cloud that is raining.” I looked back at my cutie mark as a small lump began to form in my throat. The mark actually had two meanings, but I debated on whether I should tell her both of them. Clearing my throat, I softly began the tale. “As a foal, I had always been fascinated with plants. I loved the colors and the smells that they produced. But as I grew older, I became fascinated with taking a small seed, planting it, and watching it grow into something beautiful. It wasn’t until later on, when I first arrived here at Ponyville, that it really hit me what my special talent was. All I knew was that I enjoyed taking care of plants and watching the faces on other ponies as they viewed my masterpieces. It wasn’t long after my arrival here that I got my cutie mark.” I stopped my story there, but I stared out over the valley, trying to not let a tear roll down my face. There was so much more to the story, so much pain that came with that story. But now was not the time to tell her. I quickly wiped at my eye, trying to make it look like I just had an itch. I looked at Fluttershy as she smiled at me. “I like that story. And it makes sense, seeing as all living things need rain to grow.” You wouldn’t like it if you knew the whole story. I wish it would just go away. I sighed inwardly as I once again looked away. I can’t tell her, not right now. But I did feel the need to finally ask her a burning question that I had to have answered. Ever since our first run in, she had seemed…different when around me. Normally she was so shy and withdrawn; but around me, she seemed more comfortable. “Fluttershy, can I ask you a question?” She looked at me with those beautiful eyes, and I almost stopped talking right there. But I had to get this answered. “You seem so…different around me. I was wondering why you feel so comfortable around me?” She appeared to be startled a little by this question, and she lowered her head as she began to blush. “I didn’t think you would notice.” My heart started beating faster. I didn’t know why, but I always thought she looked cute when she was embarrassed. “Um, i-it’s hard to explain. I guess I just, feel like I know you already. I see you around town almost every day. Working in the flowerbeds, tending the bushes, watering the lawns, you are always there.” She paused for a moment as she looked out over the valley. “It’s hard for me to put into words. But…I guess I feel safe around you. That’s the best way I can put it. You make me feel safe.” I sat there in shock. I had no idea she felt that way. Come on Cloud. You can tell her! Tell her how you feel! My head was yelling at me to tell her right there what I felt in my heart. But something held me back. No matter how much I tried to get the words out, they would not leave. She started to speak once more. “Cloud, this is so strange for me. When I’m around you, I’m not afraid of anything. You bring a peace to me that I don’t feel around anypony else.” She turned around and looked me in the eyes. “I…I feel something for you. I don’t know what it is, but there is something here; something that I can’t quite put my hoof on. I don’t know Cloud. Maybe I’m just talking crazy here.” Once again she looked out from the hill, staring at nothing in particular. I knew it was time. I scooted closer to her and stared out from the hill as well. “Fluttershy, can I tell you something?” She looked over at me. “What is it Cloud?” I cleared my throat and began to recite what I had been practicing to say all day. “I understand what you are saying Fluttershy. I have been feeling the same things you were talking about. I agree, it is difficult to put into words what we are feeling, but I think I have figured out how to best put it.” I paused as I once again cleared my throat and then turned to look at her. “I like you Fluttershy. Ever since I first laid my eyes on you, you have brought feelings inside me to the surface I have never felt before. These things that we feel, I think I know what it is. I have never said this to anypony else...but…” I couldn’t take it anymore. I leaned over and kissed her. I could feel her tense up, but after a moment she began to softly kiss back. Our lips danced over each other, soft and gentle. We parted just long enough for me to speak. “I love you Fluttershy. I have loved you from the day I first saw you, but I didn’t know how to tell you. The thought of you rejecting me scared me.” I could feel tears of joy begin to well up in my eyes. She stared at me, eyes wide in amazement. We just stared at each other for what felt like hours, when she finally spoke. It was a simple phrase, but it meant the world to me. “I love you too Cloud.” Our lips once again met as we kissed passionately underneath the moon and twinkling stars. This was going to be a night neither of us was ever going to forget. > Chapter 5: Two Ponies in Love > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- The next day I had to go back to my job as the head gardener because I had a group of flowers in my green house that were all ready to be transplanted into the beds in the Ponyville town square. However, the events from the previous night weighed heavily upon my mind. I had finally told Fluttershy how I really felt about her, and she had, to my utter joy, echoed those same feelings back to me. I felt relieved that I didn’t have to carry around in secret my emotions and feelings about her. Now that they were in the open, it gave me a sense of having a great burden lifted off of my shoulders. I grabbed what plants I needed and loaded them into my wagon and began to head to Ponyville to begin my day. As I worked, I kept looking for Fluttershy to appear in the cracks of the crowds. But as the day wore on, and the crowds started to thin out, I realized I had seen no sign of Fluttershy. I thought to myself that this was a bit odd since I saw her, for as long as I could remember, every day in Ponyville. But I quickly brushed these thoughts aside as I cleaned myself up and began to head home. I’m sure she’s fine. Probably just had some things to take care of at her cottage. Maybe one of her animal friends got sick and needed to be cared for. As I sunk into my bed for the night, I smiled as I brought back to my mind the feel of her soft lips against mine as we passionately kissed atop the hill underneath the moon and stars. As sleep began to take its hold on me, my smile grew even bigger as I slipped into my dreams. …… As I tended more of the flowerbeds in the square the next day, I still saw no sign of Fluttershy. A small thought of worry entered into my head as I looked for her, but I quickly brushed it aside. She’s probably just tending to her animals again today. Maybe one of them was sick. But then the next day rolled around and once again I saw no sign of her. I began to worry more as two more days passed with no sign of Fluttershy. After a week of not seeing her, I thought that I should go check on her. I’m sure everything is fine. She probably just got busy and hasn’t had the time to come into town. I quickly packed a few things into my saddle bags and headed off to her cottage. After getting lost and asking a random pony in town how to get to her cottage, I found myself standing in front of her door. Even after kissing her while on our picnic, I still felt nervous about trying to talk to her. She seemed to be fine after we parted ways that night, but the nagging feeling in the back of my head that something was not right would not leave. I slowly lifted a hoof and knocked on the door several times. After a moment of complete silence, I knocked once again. Again, nothing but silence reached my ears. I pressed an ear to the door, hoping to hear some small sign of life inside. The worry began to grow stronger as the sound of silence continued. Puzzled, I trotted off the porch and around to the back. As I rounded the corner, I saw that the back door was slightly ajar. I took off my saddlebags and slowly trotted up to the door. “Fluttershy?” I quietly whispered. “It’s me…White Cloud.” When no one responded, I gently nudged the door open with my hoof. “Fluttershy? Are you here?” I began to slowly trot into the cottage, trying to see anything in the darkness. As I trotted farther in, I slammed my leg into a table. Grimacing in pain, I tried to be as quiet as I could as slow moans escaped from my mouth. “Good job White Cloud.” I said through clenched teeth. “If she didn’t know you were here, she does now.” Softly rubbing my foreleg, I peered around the cottage as my eyes finally adjusted to the darkness. As I looked around, there seemed to be no sign that anypony had been in here recently. I finally located a lantern and matches and was able to bring some light to the situation. It appeared that the house had been vacant from some time. Everything seemed to be perfect, a little too perfect. As I trotted around, nothing seemed to have been disturbed. A thin layer of dust seemed to cover everything. My mind began racing as scenario after scenario ran through my head. Maybe she went on a vacation. Maybe she went to go visit a friend. But where did all of her animals go? Oh no…did I scare her away? Did I push things too far or too quick? Oh White Cloud…what have you done? The nervousness hit me harder than ever before and I nearly collapsed as I thought about what I had done. You will never see her again. You pushed her too hard and it scared her away. You should have taken things slower, you should have built up to kissing her. You rushed things, and now she is gone for good. I sank to the floor and buried my head into my legs as I began to cry. Why White Cloud? Why did you have to kiss her? It was too soon. As I lay there crying, I felt a tiny paw on my shoulder. “Go away.” The paw pushed a little harder. “I said go away!” Quickly lifting my head and snarling at whatever had been touching me, I saw a small white object go shooting behind the couch. I laid there sniffling as I suddenly realized who it was. “Angel? Angel Bunny, is that you?” A small white head timidly poked its head around the corner of the couch. My heart lept for joy as I finally saw a familiar face. “Oh Angel! I’m so happy to see you!” But he didn’t come closer. I realized I had probably frightened him to death. I put a hoof out and softly called to him. “I’m sorry Angel, I didn’t mean to scare you. I was just looking for Fluttershy. You wouldn’t happen to know where she is, would you?” As I said the name Fluttershy, I saw his long ears perk up. He quickly dashed out from behind the couch and grabbed onto my hoof, pulling as hard as his little bunny arms would allow. When I didn’t immediately get up, he dashed over to the door, pounding his foot and pointing out into the Everfree Forest. A shudder ran through my body as I finally understood where he wanted me to go. I slowly got up and trotted over to the door. “She’s in t-there?” Angel continued to pound his foot and point towards the forest. As I continued to stand there, Angel frowned and dashed behind me and tried to push me out the door. “Ok, ok…I get the message. She’s in the forest.” A shiver ran down my back as I slowly began to trot towards the edge of the forest. A large lump began to form in my throat as all the stories I had heard as a foal began to invade my mind. Stories about Manticores and Cockatrices, as well as other hideous creatures that took ponies that were foolish enough to venture into the forest. Those stories never ended happily. As I reached the first few trees, I swallowed the lump that had formed. You can do this White Cloud. Those stories were just told to scare young foals. None of them are true. I quickly shifted my eyes back and forth searching for any sign of danger, but all that I saw were trees and bushes. Ok, let’s do this. With little confidence, I stepped into the world of nightmares. …… At first it didn’t seem so bad. The day was warm and the sky was clear. For a while, the sun leaked through the tree tops illuminating everything I could see. But as I went deeper, the foliage began to grow thicker and the trees bigger until their tops shut out the sun. However before the sun was completely cut off, I was able to find a worn path through the forest. I didn’t know where it led, but I figured it was as good a place to start looking for Fluttershy. Angel said she was in here, and I wasn’t going to stop searching for her. The worry had never left my mind, and in fact it had multiplied to sky high levels since Angel had told me she was in here. I hoped the stories weren’t true, but as the sun went away, I began to hear noises. I had no idea if they were real, or just my mind playing tricks on me. But every crack and rustle brought to my mind the horrors that had been told to me as a foal. I was shaking so hard as I slowly crept along the path. I dared not call out Fluttershy’s name for fear that some horrible monster would leap out and take me for its dinner. So I continued down the path, sweeping my head back and forth, looking for any sign of Fluttershy’s passing. As the hours drug on, I began to feel very tired, but a great sadness was beginning to make its way into my head. Just give up White Cloud. It’s hopeless to try and find her in here. You have no idea where you are and you are going to end up getting lost in here forever. She is gone, and there is nothing you can do about it. You moved too fast and scared her away. And then another voice entered into my head. Listen, I know you are scared. But you can’t just leave her out here all alone. She could be hurt, or worse. You love her, and there is nothing that can stop you from getting to your love. I paused as the last words echoed in my mind. I couldn’t leave her out here. She was the one pony of me, and there was nothing that was going to stop me from pursuing her. I quickly picked up the pace as I began down the path once more. With my renewed confidence, the forest didn’t seem as oppressive as it had before. After a few minutes, I could see up ahead what appeared to be the mouth of a cave. I slowed down a little and cautiously trotted up to it. Even though I was more confident, I wasn’t stupid. I may feel better, but there could still be things out here that would love to take advantage of a lone pony. I stopped and listened for any sound coming from the cave. After a moment of nothing but silence, I slowly began to make my way inside. It was warmer inside than it had been outside, and the cave was larger than it appeared. I could hear my hooves echoing along the walls as I continued to delve deeper and deeper into the cave. It was only a few minutes, or what I think was a few minutes, when I saw a faint light bouncing off of the walls. I slowed down once again and quietly crept up towards the source of the light. As I rounded a corner, I came upon a small fire in the middle of a large room. There appeared to be no other exits except for the corridor I was standing in. There was a small opening in the top of the room that released the smoke that the fire produced so that the room would be comfortable to stay in. As I crept closer, I saw a form lying next to the fire, shivering. Suddenly, the figure let out a small moan and slowly rolled towards me. I recognized the figure right away, and my heart soared. It was Fluttershy! I had found her! I saw that she was sleeping, so my presence remained unnoticed. She was still shivering though, even though she was next to the fire. Another moan escaped from her mouth as she rolled onto her back. She appeared to be dreaming, but I could tell from the way she moved it was not a pleasant dream. I quietly crept up to her and gently laid a hoof on her shoulder. “Fluttershy, it’s me.” I softly said. She stirred a little, but her eyes didn’t open. “Fluttershy, it’s me. White Cloud.” Her eyes began to slowly open, and then a quiet scream erupted from her as she bolted over to the other side of the room. She was quickly looking everywhere, panting and frightened out of her mind. I backed off quickly to give her as much space as she needed. She finally seemed to notice me as hear breathing began to slow a little. “O-Oh, it’s y-you.” She said quietly. I smiled at here. “I got worried when I didn’t see you for a week. I thought maybe something had happened to you.” She seemed to get more control and she began to very slowly make her way back over to the fire. “I…I know. I’m sorry.” I also made my way over to the fire and laid down across from her. “What happened? You seemed fine after our picnic when I left you at your cottage.” Fluttershy looked into the fire. She seemed unable to look at me. “I don’t know White Cloud. I-It’s hard to explain.” I didn’t want to push her too hard, but I needed to know what happened. “Was it me? Did I come on too strong?” “Oh no, it wasn’t you. I just…” She slowly trailed off as she continued to stare deeply into the fire. “What? What is wrong?” I began to see tears roll down her cheeks as she began to softly cry. “It’s…it’s me. I don’t know what to do. After kissing you, I felt so scared. When you left me, all of these feelings and emotions began to overwhelm me. It got so bad I had to just run away. That’s what I do Cloud, I run. When something happens I don’t like, I run. I didn’t care where I went; I just needed to get away. I fled into the forest, not really caring where I went. Usually, the forest frightens me, but that night there were far worse things than monsters. As I trotted around for a long time, I found the cave where I had found Harry the Bear. I remembered that day, and it brought a smile to my face. I also remembered that at the back of the cave was this room. So I slowly gathered some wood and built a fire. After a little bit, I heard a rustling in the cave. I hid behind a rock, scared out of my mind, when I saw Angel had found me. I cried as I quickly scooped him up and held him in a tight hug. I was so happy to see someone who was my friend. Since then, Angel has been bringing me food and I have stayed here alone, until you showed up. When I saw you, it began to bring up all of the feelings and emotions I had. I’m sorry Cloud. I…I just don’t…” She began to weep harder as I quickly made my way over to her and put my hoof around her shoulder. “It’s going to be ok Fluttershy. I understand what you are trying to say. I pushed things too fast and it scared you. I’m sorry I frightened you.” She began to slowly stop crying, but the tears kept coming down. She lifted her head and looked at me. “No White Cloud. You don’t need to be sorry. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have left like I did. I have been trying to be more assertive, trying to get my fears under control. But that night brought a whole other fear to the surface; one I had never thought I would see.” She looked straight into my eyes, and they seemed to pierce me to my soul. “I never thought I could love anypony. Or that anypony could ever love me. Who would want me? I’m sacred of everything, I am shy, timid, and not adventurous. I prefer to be around animals, and I am not a very good speaker. I am really nopony special. But then you came along, and showed me what I truly am. No matter my problems, you still love me. I could see that during our picnic; the way you looked at me, the way I brought a smile to your face. Nopony has ever looked at me like you do.” She paused for a moment and smiled. “You really love me, don’t you?” I grinned at her as I ran a hoof along her cheek. “Yes Fluttershy, I love you. I will never stop loving you. No matter how scared, or shy, or timid you I, I will always love you. You are a special pony, and never tell yourself otherwise. I see a lot of myself in you. I think that’s what attracted me to you. You and I, we are more alike than you could ever imagine. I mean, it took everything I had to even talk to you. I tried several times, but each time I just froze. Until you showed me how kind and gentle you are. After you returned my bag to me at the café, I knew without a doubt that you were the one pony for me. And at the picnic, I needed to tell you how I really felt about you. I didn’t mean to scare you, but I couldn’t keep it bottled up any longer. I will always and forever love you.” I then bent down and kissed her on the cheek. She blushed a little at this and her smile grew even bigger. “Thank you Cloud, you don’t know how much that means to me.” I got up and held my hoof out to her. “You’re welcome Fluttershy. Now come on, I think we should get you back home.” I helped her up as we then headed out of the cave. As we headed down the path, I felt much better since having that talk with Fluttershy. I felt like we both still had a lot of learning to do about each other, but this had been a good first step. > Chapter 6: A Forgotten Past > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- There are no words that can explain what my times with Fluttershy were like. The best I can do is magical, freeing, and alive. But these words do not capture my true feelings for her. These were some of the happiest times I had ever had in my life. We had been seeing each other for about 2 months now, and each and every day was better than the last. She even introduced me to all of her animal friends. At first, they were very hesitant of me. I mean, I was a new pony in their group, and I think that scared them a little. But soon, they warmed up to me and even began to look forward to my visits. Fluttershy was always very busy taking care of her animals, but she always had time for me. I was the happiest pony alive, and nothing could ever spoil this for me. Or so I thought. …… It was just around the two month mark of me going out with Fluttershy, and I was getting ready to take her out on another picnic. That was one of our favorite things to do. We both loved the outdoors, and especially during the fall, we both enjoyed just looking at all of the beautiful trees as their leaves began to change color. I was very much looking forward to today, and I was expecting Fluttershy to show up at any time. I heard a knock on the door, and I smiled to myself as I trotted over. I began to open the door and I started to say, “You’re a bit early…” but I was cut short, for standing on my doorstep was not Fluttershy. In fact, it was the last pony I had ever expected to see. “Hello White Cloud. I didn’t think the rumors were true. That you had left all of us and came to live with these, ponies.” She said this last part with a hint of disgust as she pushed her way past me. “Oh my, what a quaint little house you have here.” She started to trot around, looking at everything, but not touching anything. “W-what are you doing here?” I stammered, not really sure what to say. I was speechless. “Oh, I just wanted to come see for myself if the rumors were true. I mean, a pony like you leaving all of what you had to come and live here. It’s perfectly barbaric.” “That life was not for me. I wanted to get out and find my true calling. I was not happy there, and I never will be. But I found Ponyville, and the ponies here accepted me. I am happy here, and I have a good life here. And I am never going back.” “Not even for me?” she said with a sly grin on her face. “I’m sorry, but I have someone else. And we are very happy together. Now, I think you should leave.” “Oh, aren’t we the assertive one. Fine, but this is not over.” I opened the door to let her out as she stormed past me. I watched her leave, but then I saw that Fluttershy passing her on the lane. Fluttershy stepped to the side as the other pony entered the carriage that she had arrived in. As the carriage took off, Fluttershy began to trot back up to my house. “Who was that?” she asked. I wasn’t able to speak. “Oh my, you don’t look well. Maybe we should wait to have that picnic.” I shook my head yes as a wave of dizziness began to wash over me. I felt faint and my legs were getting weak. Why did she have to show up now? Just as I am beginning to truly be happy, why now? “I finally couldn’t take it anymore. I fainted right there in front of Fluttershy. As I fell to the ground, I heard Fluttershy frantically say, “White Cloud? White Cloud!” as I blacked out. …… I must have been out for a while because I was laying on my couch with a wet cloth over my head. I heard noises coming from my kitchen, and I remembered that Fluttershy was here. I tried to sit up, but I promptly fell back down as a wave of dizziness washed over me. I let out a little moan, and I quickly heard Fluttershy come over. “Now, don’t try to sit up. You took a nasty fall and you hit your head pretty hard. Here, I made you some broth.” She handed me a small cup of what smelled like vegetable broth. I took a small sip and then closed my eyes as I felt the warmth flowing through me. “You looked terribly sick when I got here. Did it have something to do with that other pony?” I had almost forgotten about her, when the memory came back to me. I didn’t want to tell her. That part of me was no longer alive. I had buried that past, and I only cared about present and my time with Fluttershy. But, I knew that I couldn’t keep it buried forever. That pony showing up today proved that. I felt very sick to my stomach, but I decided to tell her. “Fluttershy, I have a past. A past that I am not proud of. A past that I wanted to forget about. I wanted to start a new life because my old life was not for me. It is kind of a long story so you might want to take a seat.” I motioned to one of the chairs in the room. She trotted over and pulled it up to the couch. “It all starts in Canterlot.” …… “I was not born here in Ponyville. I was born in Canterlot to a very wealthy family. I had several siblings, and we were all very happy. My father was very well known around Canterlot, and my mother attended all of the parties that people in that society like to throw. I was always drug around to these parties where I had to wear these fancy clothes that made me feel so uncomfortable. I hated going to those gatherings. I never felt comfortable around those rich ponies, always talking like they were the only important ponies and none of the other ponies mattered. Every night, I would go to sleep and dream about a life outside of Canterlot. Away from all of the jewels and sophistication that comes with that type of life. I wanted something more. Not long after my 6th birthday, I was outside playing in the dirt, and I noticed a small flower just beginning to bloom. I was fascinated by this flower. It called to me in a way that nothing had ever called to me. It made me feel happy inside. I carefully dug it up, and took it in to my mother to show her this beautiful treasure I had found. But when I showed her, she began to get upset. “Get that filthy thing out of here! Just look at you! You’re covered in dirt! You need to get cleaned up right away, I have guests on their way over and I want you to look your best.” And then she called the servants in to take care of my filthy gift and to clean me up. I was heartbroken. All I wanted to do was show my mother this flower, and she only cared about how I looked for her guests. It seemed like she cared more about her friends than she did about me. I cried myself to sleep that night, wishing that I could just escape this life. Several years later, on my 9th birthday, my mother threw me a very lavish party. She invited all of her friends over to celebrate my birthday, and told them to bring their children. I was not a very outgoing pony. I didn’t have any friends because I felt like I really didn’t fit in with the other children. They were always talking like their parents, like they were better than every other pony. They were always making the servants do humiliating things because they could. Most of the time they would just sit around, drinking very rich drinks and talking about how bored they were. I didn’t like to be around them. But, if my mother wanted them to be here, then I would try to be nice. Soon, all of the guests had arrived and the party was in full swing. Most of the adults had grouped together, leaving the children to do whatever they wanted. I was in the corner, trying to remain inconspicuous. I didn’t really want to be there. I wanted to be outside, wandering around all of the beautiful plants and animals. But I knew that my mother would be furious at me if I tried to leave. So there I was, in the corner, trying to just fade away. And then, one pony came up to me. She was about my age, and I had seen her around before. She was always hanging out with the other fillies, always laughing and making fun of everypony. I really did not like her, so I just continued to stare at the floor. “Hey, whose stupid party is this? Oh right, it’s yours. We hate this party and we are going to go to another party that’s up the street. See you loser!” And then she left with the other children, laughing as they went through the door. I was crushed. I rushed upstairs and threw myself onto my bed crying for hours until the tears would no longer come. And then a thought came into my head. “I should just leave. No one wants me around here. I don’t fit in.” So I grabbed a small saddle bag and began to pack what few little things I wanted to take. It was night time by now and all of the guests had left. My parents were fast asleep as I quietly snuck out of my room, down the stairs, and out the front door. When I had gotten a little ways from the house, I looked back as tears began to roll down my cheeks. “Goodbye. I will always care about you.” I quietly whispered, and then I turned around and never looked back. I wandered through the fields and valleys of Equestria, never really knowing where I was going. I slept wherever I could find some shelter, and I did small little jobs to make some money. I did this for several months, and soon I had forgotten about my past life. Every once in a while though, I would dream of my life growing up, and a deep sadness would come over me. I continued this way for a little longer until I came upon a little greenhouse out in the middle of nowhere. I heard a pony inside humming to himself, and I decided to check it out. I knocked on the door. The humming stopped and I heard a pony trot to the door. It opened up and there was a grizzly looking pony with with a tall hat, a grey beard and mane, and a stalk of wheat sticking out of his mouth. “Can I help you?” He asked in kind of a gruff voice. “Hello sir. My name is White Cloud. I heard you humming and I wanted to see what this place was. I have never seen so many beautiful plants in one place other than back where I used to live. I was wondering if you might have a little work I could do for you? Maybe taking care of some of these plants for you?” “Heh, you think you can take care of all of these plants? I would like to see you try. These are my pride and joy, and they are like my children to me. How can I trust you?” He looked at me from under that hat and gave me the worst glare I have ever seen. “Well sir, just give me one week, and I’m sure you will be happy with my work. If you aren’t happy, then I will leave. But I will prove to you that I can care for these plants just as well as you can.” “Well son, you seem like a decent enough fellow, and you seem pretty confident of you gardening abilities. Ok. One week it is. And If I am not 100% satisified with your work, then you are getting the boot. Do we have a deal?” He stuck out his hoof towards me, and I smiled inside like I had never smiled before. “Deal.” I said as I touched his hoof. “By the way, what is your name?” I asked the grizzly pony. “Oh, my name is Mr. Greenhooves. It’s a pleasure to meet you. Come on, let me show you around the place.” > Chapter 7: The Long Return > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- At this point, I had to take a break. The next part of my story brought up a lot of painful memories that I would have liked to leave forgotten. But I knew that if I wanted to stay with Fluttershy, she needed to know it all. “I-I’m sorry Fluttershy. I need to rest for a minute. Could you make us some tea?” “Of course White Cloud.” She looked a little puzzled at the sudden stop, but she got up and headed into the kitchen. When she had left the room, I closed my eyes and tried to think of how I was going to explain the next part. I started shaking as I recalled the events, wanting so desperately to not speak of them. But it had to be done. Fluttershy soon returned with two cups of tea and sat back down, as I continued on. “This next part of my story is very difficult to talk about, but I hope you will understand. We are going to jump ahead about a year from where I left off.” …… I had been working with Mr. Greenhooves for a year now and things were going so well for me. I had started to help him out in Ponyville with all the gardens and flowerbeds around the town. I was so happy that I had finally found my true calling. I enjoyed being out under the sun, tending all the plants and flowers, making them grow so big and beautiful. I was so proud of my work, and Mr. Greenhooves was equally impressed. “Son, I have never seen more beautiful flowers in all of Equestria. Why, I don’t think I could it better myself!” I smiled at this compliment, so proud of all the hard work I had put in. We continued to work together until one day Mr. Greenhooves told me something that came as a complete shock to me. “White Cloud, I am so proud of the work you have done. This past year, it has been my pride and joy to teach you everything that I know. Now, I have some news for you. I have been offered a very prestigious position in Canterlot, and I have accepted the position. You are looking at the new Canterlot gardens caretaker!” He had the biggest smile I have ever seen, and it looked like he might just burst into a dance. “Wow! Congratulations Mr. Greenhooves! If anyone deserves that honor, it would be you!” “Thank you son, thank you. But this does leave me in a bit of a bind. Who is going to take over for me here in Ponyville?” He tapped a hoof against his chin as he chewed on the stalk of wheat he always had in his mouth and stared off into the distance. My heart started pounding faster and faster as time continued to roll by. I was hoping he had me in mind, but I didn’t want to get my hopes up. Finally, after what seemed like ages, he spoke again. “What about you White Cloud? Would you like to take over as the new Ponyville gardener?” I didn’t know what to say! I was so excited I could just burst with joy! Me! He wants me to be his replacement! “Mr. Greenhooves! I-I don’t know what to say! Of course! It would be my honor to become the new gardener of Ponyville!” “Then it’s settled my boy! I’m off in a couple of days to Canterlot to take over my new position, but your job starts now White Cloud! Congratulations!” I was overjoyed! Never, in all my dreams, had I ever imagined being the head gardener of an entire town! It was more than I could have ever hoped for, and it made me the happiest pony in all of Equestria! But that happiness was to be short lived, as my life was about to be turned completely upside down. …… It had been about two months since Mr. Greenhooves had left Ponyville to head to Canterlot and his new job. I had finally settled into a daily rhythm of tending and planting in Ponyville. I had no idea of the amount of work that Mr. Greenhooves put in to making everything look beautiful. But even though it was very hard work, I loved every minute of it. The smell of freshly dug dirt mixing with the intoxicating aroma of the flowers was better than anything I could have ever imagined. But then I was hit by something I had never imagined. It was one evening after I had gotten home from a very good day of planting some new flowers that I had just grown in my greenhouse. I was relaxing by my fireplace with a book and my evening pipe, when I heard a knock on the door. I was puzzled by this since I rarely got any visitors with living outside Ponyville in the country. I put down my book, got up, and trotted over to the door, trying to think who might be visiting me at this hour. I was not prepared for who was standing at my door. It was my sister, Golden Mane! She looked like she was on the verge of tears, but I was too stunned to say anything. “Hello brother.” She said with a quivering voice. “It has been a while.” I was finally able to squeak out a “Hello.” as my mind tried to wrap itself around what I was seeing. We continued to stand there for several minutes until Golden finally spoke and broke the silence. “C-can I come in?” Finally my mind cleared itself and I responded with a “Yes! Of course! Please!” I stepped away from the doorway and motioned for her to come in, quickly shutting the door behind her. I led her to one of the chairs by the fire and then sat across from her. She was shaking and tears began to roll down her cheeks. “Oh White Cloud, I have missed you so much. When we found out that you had run away, father and mother were furious. They sent out search parties to look for you, but you were nowhere to be found. We were so heartbroken. We had always looked up to you White Cloud, since you were the oldest. You took care of us when mother and father were too busy with their affairs, so when you left it felt like you had abandoned us, like you didn’t care about us.” She stopped talking as she began to cry, staring at the floor. I didn’t know what to tell her. This was my sister. How could I explain to her everything that I had been feeling on the days leading up to my leaving our home? I got up and trotted over to her, putting my hoof around her shoulders. “I’m so sorry Golden. I never realized that I would be missed that much. I felt like I didn’t belong, that no one loved me. And that is why I left. I needed to find my place in this world, and I knew I couldn’t do that in Canterlot. I’m so sorry.” She began to slowly stop crying, but her body still shook. I grabbed a blanket and put it around her shoulders as I trotted back to my seat. I had one burning question that I needed to ask, and I felt this was as good a time as any. “How were you able to find me?” It took her a moment to get to a place where she could respond. “After mother and father gave up trying to find you, I started where they left off. I knew you still had to be out there, and I wasn’t about to give up hope. So I started traveling all over Equestria, going from town to town, asking everypony I met if they had seen you. I heard rumors of a new gardener in Ponyville, and I hoped that it might be you they were talking about. When I finally got here, I asked a few ponies and they all seemed to recognize my description of you. They told me where your house was, and I headed over here as quickly as I could. It took me so long to find you, and I am happy to have finally come to the end of my search. But, while I was gone, something happened. Oh White Cloud!” At this she began to weep again. I quickly got up and went over to comfort her. But this time, she would not stop crying. Through the sobs, I was able to pick out, “Why weren’t you there?” and “He’s gone.” “Who’s gone?” I asked? “Oh, White Cloud. When you left, it was so hard on father. He was devastated when he had learned the news that you had left, and he fell very sick. That was part of the reason I began to look for you. I thought that maybe if I found you and brought you back, that father might get better. But, after so long, and me being unable to find you, father…father passed away. The grief was too much for him to bear, and he just, gave up on life. White Cloud! Why did you have to leave? Why?” She began to get frantic and started hitting me with her hooves, yelling over and over “Why did you leave us? Why?” I tried my best to grab her flailing legs and try to calm her down. When I was finally able to grab her, I just hugged her as tightly as I could. She kept beating my back as she continued to whisper “Why White Cloud?” I could feel tears beginning to well up in my eyes as the news finally sunk in. My father was dead. And it was my fault. Why did I have to run away? Maybe if I had stayed then this wouldn’t have happened. Golden Mane finally stopped hitting me and just laid against my chest, weeping. I continued to hold her until she finally calmed back down. She looked up at me and said, “White Cloud, we need you back. The family needs you back. Mother is in a deep depression and is unable to take care of the rest of the children. We need you White Cloud. I can’t do this on my own, I’m not strong enough.” I stepped away and trotted over to a window and stared into the night sky. I had to think about this. I was so happy here. I had finally found a place that accepted me and made me happy. I had a good life here. But how could I abandon my family at a time like this? With my father gone and my mother grief stricken, I couldn’t just leave them for a second time. “I have to go back.” I quietly whispered to myself. “I have to try and right what I did.” I turned from the window and looked at my sister. “Ok. I will go back. You need me, and I can’t abandon my family when they need me the most. Give me a few minutes to pack some things and we can be on our way.” Golden Mane smiled as she got up and came over to me. “Thank you, White Cloud. Thank you.” I quickly gathered some things together, put my saddle bags on my back, and we headed towards Canterlot. I was sad to be leaving this life behind, but I hoped that I would return someday, though I had no idea when that day would come. It would be sometime before I made my way back to Ponyville, and I would return a very different pony. > Chapter 8: A Cold Homecoming > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- It was beginning to snow as Golden Mane and I finally reached Canterlot, and I was very glad to see the welcoming gates of the city. Winter was fast approaching and the sooner we got to the house, the better. It wasn’t long before I saw my childhood home. It really didn’t look any different on the outside, but I knew that the inside was a different matter. I stopped in front of the door, wanting so desperately to not be here. “What is it White Cloud?” asked my sister. For some reason, I found myself beginning to shake as the thought of once again entering the house where I had felt no love, except the love of my siblings, that had led me to leave. “I-I don’t know if I can face mother again. After everything I have put her through, how can I face that kind of anger? M-maybe this was a bad idea.” I started to back away slowly, but then I felt a hoof on my back. “White Cloud, I know it is going to be hard, but the family needs you. We can’t continue down the road we are on. It will tear us apart, and we need to be strong for mother. She needs us.” In my heart I knew that she was right. I looked at her, and saw her beautiful brown eyes. They looked so tired, but they also had a glimmer of hope. Hope that maybe I could find some way to fix everything that had gone wrong. With my sister right behind me, I opened the door and stepped inside. …… When I stepped through the doorway, I immediately started shivering as I walked into the main hallway. It was very dark since all of the shades were covering the windows, and it was very cold. I could sense the despair that snaked its way throughout the entire house. The home was no longer bright and cheery. It felt like a tomb. As I continued to walk in and Golden Mane shut the door behind us, the sound of the door shutting echoed throughout the house like a lid slamming on a coffin. I knew that this was my home, but it felt nothing like it had when I left it. Golden Mane removed her bags and set them in a chair. I didn’t know what to say. How long had they been living like this, in the dark and depressing building that was no longer a home? “Welcome home White Cloud.” said my sister as we continued into the house. “Everyone will be in school right now. But they should be home soon.” My heart was lightened a little at the thought of getting to see my other siblings. It had been so long since I had seen them. “Where is mother?” I asked. “I would like to see her.” “She is where she is every day. She never leaves her room. All day, she just sits in her rocking chair and stares out the window. She doesn’t seem to recognize us anymore.” At this, Golden began to cry again, and I wrapped a hoof around her shoulders. “It’s ok now.” I said, trying to sound as confident as possible. “Let me go see her. Maybe I can talk to her.” Golden looked up at me as the tears continued to leak from her eyes. “She never says a word. I try to talk to her, try to get her to leave her room, but nothing ever happens. She just continues to stare out the window, never uttering a sound.” I patted her on the shoulder as I gently pushed her away. “I have to see her.” I turned and began to make my way up the main staircase that led to the bedrooms. I remembered the path well, seeing as I had taken these same steps many times as a young pony. I remembered which room was mine and which were my siblings as I made my way past all of the rooms. But then I stopped, for there at the end of the hall was the door that made me shiver. It was the tallest in the hallway, and the most foreboding. I always feared going near that door because for some reason it always scared me to think of what was on the other side. “I have to do this.” I whispered to myself. “Not just for Golden, but for everyone else too.” I lifted my head high as I trotted up to the door, took a deep breath, and pushed. The door elicited a soft squeak as I slowly entered into a room that made my skin crawl. I didn’t think it was possible, but this room felt even more dark and depressing as I began to enter. I had never been in my parents’ bedroom since the children were always forbidden to enter their sanctuary. It was much bigger than I had always thought it to be. There was a large fireplace on one wall and a large collection of artwork on the opposite wall. At the end was a giant four-poster bed that was surrounded by red curtains. There were four large windows, two on each wall, that were all covered with giant curtains, save one. The last window on the right side was not fully covered. I could see light entering the room through a slit in the curtain. Then I heard a slow creaking sound coming from near the light. I saw a rocking chair moving back and forth ever so slightly, and what appeared to be a mare seated in it. I slowly began to make my way towards the figure in the chair, trying to make as little noise as possible. As I got closer, the pony in the chair started to become clearer. She looked old…worn out. As I got closer I saw that her mane had become a silvery grey and her skin was very worn. As I reached the edge of the chair, I began to tear up as saw her eyes. The eyes that at one time had been so bright and full of life, were now just empty shells of their former selves. They stared out through the window, out across the gardens and into the hills outside of Canterlot, but not really seeing any of it. I laid a hoof on her leg and said, “Hello mother. It’s me, your son. White Cloud. I’ve come back.” She just continued to stare out the window. There was no response at all when I said those words. “I heard about father.” I continued. “If only I had stayed then maybe none of this would have happened.” I could feel tears begin to roll down my cheeks. “Maybe if I had been a little stronger, or tougher, then father would still be alive. I-I am so sorry. I never meant for any of this to happen.” I couldn’t hold it in any longer. I began to weep as I looked at my mother and remembered how beautiful she looked before I had left our home. How she was always smiling, always dressed in her finest clothes. She was so beautiful. And now, she had become an empty shell of herself. There was no emotion, no sadness, nothing. She had given up on life. Between sobs, I softly whispered, “I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry.” After a few minutes, I felt a hoof on my shoulder. It was Golden Mane. I never heard her enter. I turned and looked at her as the tears continued to flow. I whispered, “I didn’t know what leaving would do to this family.” “It’s ok White Cloud. You’re here now. You see how much we need you. How much I need you. I became the strong one in this family when you left, but I can’t do it anymore. The burden of trying to take care of our brothers and sisters has worn me down to nothing. I have nothing left to give.” I could hear her words, and they sounded so tired and hopeless. I wiped away my tears as I smiled at her. “I will set things right. I can’t promise that everything will become as it was before, but I can at least try.” “Thank you, brother. Thank you.” I heard the front door of the house open and then shut a moment later. “Oh, that would be your brothers and sisters coming home from school. I think that you should go greet them.” Golden Mane turned and trotted out of the room. Before I followed her, I turned back around and slowly moved closer to my mother. “I promise to do what I can to make things right.” With those final words, I placed a kiss on her cheek and then slowly made my way out of the room. When the door was shut, a single tear rolled down my mother’s face and a small smile was born on her face. > Chapter 9: An Unexpected Visitor > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- “White Cloud…WHITE CLOUD?” My eyes flashed open and I sat up gasping for air and sweating heavily. It took me a minute to get my bearings and realize I was still at my childhood home when I noticed Golden Mane standing next to my bed. She had a hoof on my leg and looked very concerned. “You were having that dream again, weren’t you?” I slowly nodded to her as I brought a hoof up to my head and closed my eyes, trying to erase the nightmarish visions that kept dancing through my head. “I-I just can’t seem to stop. Since I arrived back to this house, I have had the same nightmare every single night.” Golden trotted a little closer and wrapped her hoofs around me in a gentle hug. “It’s going to be all right Cloud. We will get through this.” I wanted to believe her. I wanted to believe that everything was going to return back to the way it was before I had run away. But with my father gone and my mother in a state of depression that no pony could seem to break, it was all resting on my shoulders to make things right. Golden had done her best to provide for the family and to take care of our siblings, but it was just too much for one pony to handle. Since my return I had tried my best to turn the house back to its original state. I made sure that the windows were no longer kept covered and that the fireplaces had enough wood to keep them burning for days. Since my father’s passing, the entire house staff had been let go seeing as Golden was unable to provide enough bits to keep them employed. I tried my best to make the house run as smoothly as possible and to help out wherever I saw something that needed to be done. Every morning, Golden and I would wake up our brothers and sisters and get them ready for their day of school. Golden made sure that they looked presentable while I undertook the task of packing their lunches and getting their books together in their saddle bags. Each day Golden and I waved them off as they trotted happily down the lane towards the school house. After they had left, I made it my daily goal to go and try to talk with my mother for about an hour. I still held some small hope that maybe if I just talked with her that she might snap out of this blanket of depression she had wrapped around herself. It made me so sad to see her like this. I wanted my old mother back. The one that had so much life and joy about her, even if that joy was not directed towards me. Lately I had been reading to her from one of her favorite novels: A Tale of Two Ponies. It was a beautiful tale full of romance, and I always remembered how my mother smiled whenever she read it. I had hoped that maybe this book would help bring her back to this world. However, nothing I did gleaned any sort of response from her. After a chapter or two and softly telling her how the children were doing and how Golden and I were getting along, I would kiss her on her forehead and quietly leave the room. When I came out, Golden was always at the foot of the staircase hoping that I had some sort of news for her. But every day, when she saw my eyes, she lowered her head and walked away. Every evening after supper, Golden and I would gather our siblings around the fireplace and read them a story before sending them off to bed. This part of the day was always my favorite. To see their little, glowing eyes wide in wonder as I told them tales of brave knight ponies battling fierce dragons to rescue princesses locked away in towers, or tales of princesses finding their true love, getting married and living happily ever after. Before they left, they would always give hugs and tell me how happy they were that I was back. Then Golden would shoo them away to their rooms, trotting after them to make sure they got tucked into their beds. I always sat and stared into the fire after everypony had gone. It helped me think as I watched the orange and yellow flames dance around the logs and then leap into the air. Soon Golden would return and kiss me on my cheek as she sat next to me in front of the fire. She still looked so tired and worn, but I could see that the little spark of hope in her eyes had not yet diminished. After a while of not talking, I would say “Good night”, give her a small peck on her head, and trot off to bed. …… I was in a forest. The Everfree forest. It was so dark I could barely see to put my hoof in front of my face. Every so often a bolt of lightning would streak across the sky, lighting up the path for a brief instant. On either side of the path were large trees with gnarled roots and hideous faces carved into the trunks. Each face was a pony from my past. My mother, my father, Golden Mane, Mr. Greenhooves, all of them were there. I slowly trotted down the path as the wind began to howl fiercely. It made the tree branches seem to reach out towards me, to try and grab me, and the faces began to contort and warp into ghoulish demons. I bolted down the path, frightened, not really seeing where I was going. I saw the branch hanging over the path just before I ran head first into it and it knocked me out. I slowly opened my eyes to find myself in my parents’ bedroom. It was dark and cold. I slowly rose onto my legs when I saw my mother in her rocking chair. She was in front of the window as always, but she seemed different. “Mother? Is that you?” The chair began to slowly rock back and forth, making a creaking sound whenever it moved. I quietly began to trot towards the chair. “Is that you mother?” I continued to ask as I got closer and closer. I reached the back of the chair and quietly said, “Mother?” The chair began to slowly turn, and I quickly backed away, frightened out of my mind when I saw what was seated where my mother should have been. It was a pony skeleton with bright glowing green eyes and a wicked grin on its face. I continued to scurry backwards as it rose from the chair and began to trot towards me. “Your mother isn’t here boy!” It cackled as it continued to advance on me. “She will never be here. You left all of them, remember? She is gone boy. Gone forever!” I screamed as it reached out with its front hooves to wrap themselves around my throat. ...... I shot up in my bed, gasping for air and dripping with sweat. I could still see the pony with the green glowing eyes in my head and hear its words echoing in my ears. You left all of them, remember? I began to cry as I continued to hear those words over and over. You left all of them. She is gone boy. Gone forever! It was right; I had left all of them. It was all my fault that things had gotten so bad for this family. I buried my face in my pillow as I continued to cry, but I still heard those words in my ears… you left all of them. …… The next morning, I went through the usual routine. Golden and I got the kids up and off to school, I went and read to mother for a bit, and then went down to the main floor to see what needed to be done today. I noticed the wood was beginning to get a little low, and I figured that maybe chopping some wood would help get my mind off of the terrible nightmares I kept having. I wrapped a scarf around my neck and headed out to the wood pile, grabbing an ax from the tool shed on my way. It didn’t take long for me to get to a point where I didn’t need the scarf anymore. The exercise felt invigorating and it helped me clear my head of everything that weighed so heavily on my mind. All that mattered was the wood and the ax. I was just about finished when I heard a voice coming from behind me that stopped me in mid swing. I dropped the ax, not daring to turn around for fear of who I would see. “So you came back. I wondered how long it would take before you came running back to your mommy and daddy. Oh wait…you don’t have a daddy!” The pony behind me began to laugh as I turned around and saw who it was. It was the last pony I ever saw before I had run away from home. The one at my party that said she thought my party was stupid. That laughed at me as she left to go to some other pony’s party. I began to grow heated with rage as I looked at her, standing there all covered in sapphire jewels and laughing. I was so angry I was barely able to speak. “Sapphire Desire.” I said through clenched teeth. “Oh, you remember me.” She said, batting her eyelashes at me and smiling a flirtatious smile. “I was hoping you would remember me. How could you ever forget a pony this beautiful.” She said this last part with a hint of smugness as she trotted towards me and began to circle me. “My, you have become quiet the stallion since you left, so strong and handsome.” She draped her tail over my neck as she came back to the front, slowly sliding it across my shoulders. “I just wanted to see for myself if the rumors were true and that your family had fallen on some hard times. Looks like I was right if it was bad enough to bring YOU back.” I was too angry to say anything. I just stood there, staring at her as she turned back around. “Well, I am happy to see you. I think you will be seeing much more of me. But, I must be off. Mother is throwing me a lavish party, and I mustn’t be late. Good bye, White Cloud.” She giggled a little at saying my name as she disappeared around the house. I stood there for what seemed like hours, seething, when I finally heard Golden’s voice. “White Cloud? Where are you?” I was still standing there when Golden came out the back door. “Oh, there you are! The kids will be home any minute from school. I know you……White Cloud? Are you all right?” She trotted over to me and waved a hoof in front of my face. “Are you there? Hello, Equestria to Cloud.” I blinked my eyes a few times and shook my head. “Yeah, I’m here.” “Whew, you looked like you just saw a ghost or something. Is everything alright?” I debated on whether I should tell her or not, but I decided to just keep the little visit from Sapphire Desire to myself. “Everything is fine. Didn’t I hear you say the kids are on their way home? I should get cleaned up before they get here.” “That sounds like a good idea. You are a little on the ripe side.” She said this last part with a little grin on her face. It was nice to see, seeing as there wasn’t much to laugh about these days. We both began to head inside, but I still had Sapphire on my mind. Why was she here? I thought to myself. What could she possible want to talk to me for? I tried to put her out of my mind, but something did not feel right, and I knew that I might have just made a huge mistake. > Chapter 10: Surrounded by Darkness > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- I once again paused the story as emotion threatened to take over. I don’t know if I can do it. This is so painful. Tears began to well up in my eyes as I thought about what I was about to tell Fluttershy. She looked concerned as she quickly got up and came to sit by me. I couldn’t hold the tears back any longer, and they began to roll down my face. Fluttershy put a hoof around my shoulders and pulled me into an embrace. “It’s ok Cloud. It’s going to be ok.” She whispered in my ear as I continued to weep uncontrollably. We continued to sit there for several minutes until I was able to calm myself back down. I slowly lifted my head and looked into her eyes. They looked so beautiful, so kind and gentle and caring. She gave me a smile as I continued to stare at her. “Whatever you have to tell me, I will understand.” “W-will you stay by me?” I quietly asked. “Of course I will.” With her sitting next to me, I was finally settled down enough to continue. “You may not like what I am about to tell you, but you need to hear it. I’m going to start the next day after the visit from Sapphire.” …… I still could not get the visit from Sapphire Desire out of my head. She had really shaken me up. I never expected to see her again, but there she was. And what did she mean by I will be seeing much more of her? I was so lost in thought that the hammer I was swinging came down on my hoof instead of the nail I was driving into a board. “AAAHHHHH!!! SON OF A MANTICORE!!!” I yelled as I quickly stuck my hoof into my mouth, trying to dull the pain and keep from yelling again. I heard the back door quickly open and close as Golden came out on the porch. “Is everything all right out here?” I removed my hoof and said, “Yeah, I just hit my hoof with the hammer.” “Well, try to hit the nail next time. It works better.” She gave me a sly grin as she went back into the house. “Yeah, yeah, always the comedian.” I said quietly as I turned back around to continue repairing a window shutter. Soon I was lost in thought again as I continued with my work. This time I was thinking about the last several weeks. I had finally been able to get the family into a normal routine, with Golden’s help. It hadn’t been easy, but things were finally beginning to resemble some sort of normalcy. I still spent time with my mother every day; though I was beginning to think that she will never recover from her depression. Golden still held a slim hope that my daily interactions with her might still bring her around, but I didn’t have the heart to tell her how I felt. I finally finished the repairs on the shutter and went to the front of the house to place it back on the window. After a few minutes, it was back in place and looking just like new. I stepped back a few paces to admire my work, noting that you could not tell that it was the same old shutter that had been there for so long. I smiled as I went back around the house and in through the back door. Golden was in the kitchen baking what smelled like sugar cookies. “Those smell delicious, sis!” I said as I trotted up to the oven. There was a tray of fresh cookies that had just been removed from the oven sitting on top. “Cloud, don’t you even think about taking one of those cookies.” Golden said as she quickly turned around and gave me a stern look. “They are for Mrs. Skies. She just had a foal and I am taking these to her as a congratulations gift.” I looked at her with sad, puppy dog eyes and my lower lip quivering. She looked away, trying to stifle a laugh. I slowly trotted closer, my eyes getting bigger. She looked back at me, and then started laughing hysterically. I continued to wear my silly sad face until she finally calmed down enough to wipe a tear from her eye. “Oh White Cloud, you know just how to liven up the mood. Ok, you can have one, but no more.” I smiled and gave her a quick peck on the cheek. “You’re the best, sis!” I trotted over to the pan and grabbed a still warm cookie. “I am going to go visit with mom for a while. Are you ok down here?” I saw her smile slightly fade and her eyes become slightly darker at the mention of our mother. “Yes, I’ll be fine. You go ahead.” I nodded as I turned around and headed up to our mothers room. …… “Diamond was finally able to track down the mare that she loved, and rushed into his open hooves as quickly as she could. They embraced and quickly began to kiss, savoring each and every second of that time. For both ponies knew they had finally found the one that they loved, and they would never be apart again.” I closed the book and laid in on the nightstand next to the bed. A Tale of Two Ponies was always her favorite book. I continued to read it to her, hoping that it might snap her out of this depression. I let out a sigh as I sat back in my chair and looked out the window. “I wish you could hear me. I want to believe you are still in there. If only you would let me know. Give me some sort of sign that you are still with us.” I continued to stare out the window as the sky began to darken with storm clouds. The weather report had called for rain the next several days, and it looked like the Pegasi were right on schedule. I sighed once more as I got out of my chair and began to slowly make my way to the bedroom door. I could hear the rain beginning to tap on the window, as I reached the door. “W-White Cloud?” I froze. It couldn’t be her, must be wishful thinking. I reached for the door handle. Then I heard it again, slightly louder. “White Cloud?” I quickly turned around and rushed over to the chair as I saw my mother staring back at me! “Mother! Oh mother!” I cried out as I quickly grabbed her hoof and began to cry tears of joy. She slowly smiled at me and patted my hoof with hers. “I-I’m here White Cloud.” “Mother, we thought we had lost you! You have been sitting here for weeks just staring out the window. I came and talked with you ever day. I even read you your favorite book!” A tear ran down her face as she turned back to the window. “We thought we had lost you, White Cloud. We tried to find you. But…” She began to weep as she placed her hooves over her eyes. “Why White Cloud? Why did you run away? Y-Your father…he…” She couldn’t finish the sentence. I looked down at the floor as she continued to weep, feeling like I had done everything wrong. I knew I was the cause of all this pain and suffering. “I know mother. I know this is all my fault. Everything that happened is my fault. If only…if only I had the courage to stay. If only I had been brave enough to tell you my feelings. None of this would have happened. Father would still be alive, Golden Mane would still be a young mare with dreams and ambitions. My brothers and sisters would still have a mother and father to take care of them.” I began to shed tears as I stared at the floor, unable to look my mother in the eye. It really is all my fault. As I continued to stare at the floor, I felt a hoof on my head. I slowly lifted my head and saw that my mother had stopped crying. “White Cloud, don’t blame yourself. I know your father and I were not there for you. We cared more about what we wanted, and not what we best for our children. I blame myself for you running away. I was not a caring mother. I’m so sorry White Cloud. I know no amount of apologies will ever be able to make up for what I did, but I hope this is a start.” I smiled at her as I leaned over and gave her a hug. “I forgive you mother. And, I am so sorry I ran away. I promise to never leave you again.” “Will you help me over to the bed? I feel very tired all of a sudden.” I helped lift her out of the chair and we slowly trotted over to the bed. She sat down on the edge, and I helped her lift her legs up onto the bed. I slowly pulled the covers up to her chin as she smiled at me once more. “White Cloud, no matter what, I will always love you.” I smiled back and kissed her on her forehead. “You get some rest. You’re going to have a lot of company tomorrow. I know all of the children will want to see you, especially Golden mane. She is going to be so happy!” I quickly trotted over to the door and went into the hallway, quietly closing it behind me. I couldn’t wait to tell Golden! She was going to be so thrilled to hear that mother was back! I heard noises coming from the kitchen, so I quickly made my way down there, eager to tell Golden the wonderful news! …… “CLOUD! CLOUD! WAKE UP! SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH MOTHER!” I felt hooves shaking me furiously as I slept in my bed. I slowly woke up, still very groggy. I saw that Golden was standing by my bed, looking scared. I quickly became alert and asked, “What is wrong?” “It’s mother! I went in to take her some hot tea and when I went to wake her, she wouldn’t move! I tried calling to her, shaking her, but there was no response! Oh Cloud, do something!” I quickly lept out of bed and went dashing into the bedroom. “Mother! MOTHER!” I cried as I rushed to her bedside. She was still lying right where I had seen her the night before, but she looked pale. “MOTHER! WAKE UP MOTHER!” I laid my hooves on her legs and shook her. “MOTHER! YOU HAVE TO WAKE UP!” I put a hoof in front of her muzzle, but I felt no air coming out. “No…this can’t happen…mother, you have to wake up…you have to wake up.” I closed my eyes as the realization finally sunk in…our mother had passed away some time in the night. Tears began to stream down my face as I laid my head on her chest. I quietly whispered “mother” every so often as I began to weep uncontrollably. I heard a soft cry behind me and I turned to see Golden standing there, weeping as well. I slowly got up and went over to her, wrapping my hooves around her. She laid her head on my shoulder as we both stood there weeping. First our father had passed away, and now our mother was gone too. I didn’t know what to think or say. All that mattered in that moment was the two of us. I was finally able to clear my head long enough to take Golden out of the room. The children were all standing in the hallway, looking worried, and we tried to explain to them how our mother had passed. Each one of them began to weep, as Golden and I tried to comfort them the best we could. I was now the head of the house, but was I ready for this type of responsibility? Was I ready to take care of everyone? …… The funeral was very quiet and beautiful. Ponies from all over the city and even some from other towns came to pay their respects. It was a graveside service, and the rain was steadily pouring down on everpony. As the preacher wrapped up his sermon, I, followed by Golden, each took a hoof full of dirt and threw it into the grave. Each pony in attendance did this until there was a small pile of dirt on top of the coffin. As I held Golden, she began to weep once more as we headed to our carriage. Just as we reached the carriage, I looked over and saw Sapphire Desire standing a little ways away. At the time I didn’t think much of it, but I should have known that she was trouble the moment she first came and talked to me. Little did I know what was in store for me, that it was going to change me forever. > Chapter 11: The Darkness Before the Dawn > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- The next several weeks were full of tears and sorrow as the passing of our mother really hit all of the family hard. Golden and I tried to get the family back to a set schedule, but every night we sat by the fire as tears streamed down our faces, never saying a word to each other. The guilt of my leaving once again had risen up in me and I felt like anything I tried to say would just sound empty and hollow. Every day we would just go through the motions of our daily lives, not really living. About two weeks after her passing, I began to see more of Sapphire Desire. She always kept her distance, but no matter where I went she was there. I didn’t really think too much of it since the death of my mother was always first on my mind. But as the weeks rolled by, I began to take notice. Ever since our meeting when I had returned home, she had never really left my mind. About a month after my mother dying, I was sitting in a café in the middle of Canterlot drinking a cold cider. I had been getting out of the house more and more recently because it just felt so dark and depressing there. I would usually take to the streets, just wandering around. Many time I would end up in one of the parks around the city and just sit and watch everypony go about their daily lives. In some small way, this made me a little happier. But on this day in the café, Sapphire Desire decided to make her move. “Hello White Cloud.” She said in her silky smooth voice as she sauntered up to me. “What are you doing out here?” She smiled a little, and blinked her long eyelashes at me. I continued to stare at my drink, not answering. “Come on Cloudie, I don’t want to cause any trouble. I just want to talk.” I was still upset over our last meeting, and I quietly said to her, “I have nothing to say to you.” I heard the chair across from me slide out and a pony sat down in it. I smelled the most intoxicating scent begin to waft its way over to me. “Then I will talk. I know our meetings have not been, all that pleasant.” I snickered a little at this. “You think?” “Please, just hear me out. Ever since we were foals, I have liked you. I didn’t want the other foals to know because I had a certain image I had to uphold. But secretly, I always liked you. I would watch you from a distance, but I never dared to actually tell you how I felt.” I heard a small sniffle escape from her. I looked up and saw her looking at the table as a tear rolled down her face. “When I heard you had left, it nearly tore me apart. I didn’t eat, I didn’t sleep, I stayed in my room all day. For so many years I feared I would never see you again. But then I heard about your return to take care of your family. I was so happy to hear this news! But it took me so long to go over to your house to see you. I was afraid. I knew I hadn’t been the kindest mare. But when I saw you, I fell back into my old habits. I don’t know what came over me.” She paused as she wiped tears from her eyes. “I will understand if you don’t like me. I would not be surprised if you hated me. But I wanted to tell you…I’m sorry. For everything I did and said to you.” She looked up at me. I had been deathly silent since she had started. I didn’t know how to react. Is this some sort of trick? Does she have some sort of agenda here? “Ok, I understand. You don’t have to say anything. But I just wanted you to know that I was sorry.” She pushed herself away from the table and started to trot off with her head hung low. “Sapphire, wait.” I pushed myself away from the table and trotted over to her. I took her head on my hooves and looked into her eyes. They were the most beautiful shade of deep purple I had ever seen. After a moment had passed of the two of us just staring into each other eyes, I kissed her. It was a long and deep kiss, and it felt like hours had passed before we finally broke the passion. “Does that answer your question?” She smiled at me. “I love you.” She said as we once again began to passionately kiss. …… I was so happy when I returned home that night. I was whistling a little tune as I opened the door and stepped inside. My heart was as light as a feather as I trotted into the kitchen looking for a snack. I decided to grab an apple and then trot into the living room where I knew Golden would be. I was so anxious to tell her my good news, and I thought that maybe this might help to raise her spirits. I saw her seated by the fire as we usually were in the evenings, except that tonight was going to be different. “Golden!” I exclaimed as I trotted in. “I have some wonderful news!” She just continued to stare into the fire. I trotted to a chair across from her and sat down. “So funny story, I was sitting in a café, minding my own business, when Sapphire Desire showed up. I was not happy to see her, but she sat down and began to apologize for how she had treated me before. And then, and this is the real shocker, she told me that she likes me! We ended up kissing right there in the middle of the café, and then we wandered around the city, talking!” I noticed that Golden had not moved or said anything. “Golden, are you all right?” She slowly turned her head, and I saw that she had an anger in her eyes I had never seen before. “How could you, Cloud.” She said with venom dripping from her voice. “Of all the mares you could fall in love with, you chose her?” “What are you talking about?” “You really don’t see it? She is no good for you! I remember how she treated you when we were younger! I remember the hatred she had towards you, how she never wanted to be around you!” Golden was practically yelling at this point. “She is just using you Cloud! She really doesn’t love you!” I sat there, shocked, as I heard a hatred I had never heard before coming from my sister. I was so stunned I wasn’t able to respond. Golden turned back towards the fire and I saw tears begin to well up in her eyes. “I care about you White Cloud.” She said in a soft voice. “I love you and I don’t want to see you get hurt. I’m worried about you.” I was finally able to think as the last of my sister’s words sunk in. The first thing to come to my mind was anger. How dare she say such things about Sapphire! She doesn’t know her like I do! I was so angry I didn’t think about what I said next. “You don’t care about me. You don’t like seeing me happy! For once in my life, I am truly happy! And now you want to take that away from me? Thanks sis, that’s some real love there.” I got up and stormed out the front door, not really caring where I went. Just before I shut the door, I heard crying coming from the living room. I had never talked to my siblings like this, not even when I was angry. But in that moment I didn’t care. I kept telling myself that I was right and she was wrong. I’ll show her. I am happy, and nothing is going to change that. …… After that night, my sister and I began to grow apart. I loathed her for saying those things about Sapphire. How dare she say such things about a mare she doesn’t even know? Most days I was absent from the house all day. Sapphire and I spent pretty much every day together. We loved to just be in each other’s company. Of course, the make out sessions were just as wonderful as the time we spent together. Each evening I would return home to see Golden sitting by the fire, but I never talked to her. I had nothing to say to her. Sapphire and I were in love and she was not going to tear us apart. After a few months of being together, I rarely saw my family. Most of my time was now spent being with Sapphire and doing things with her. I decided to move in with her family because I had become so detached from my own family. I didn’t care about them anymore; I didn’t care what happened to them. All that mattered was Sapphire. …… Sapphire and I were up in her room making out on her bed. “White Cloud, I love you so much.” I smiled as we took a short breather. “I know. I’m your stallion and you are my mare.” Sapphire smiled at this. “And don’t you forget it.” She tackled me again and we were off making out. Suddenly there was a knock on the downstairs door. Sapphire broke our kiss. “And just as things were getting good.” She said pouting. “I’m not going anywhere.” I smiled and said slyly. She quickly hopped off the bed and trotted downstairs. I heard the door open, and then a few shorts words were said before I heard the door close again. After a minute, I heard Sapphire trotting back up to her room. “Who was that?” “Oh, it was nopony, at least nopony important.” She grinned at me with lust in her eyes. “Now, where were we? Oh right, I remember…” She jumped and tackled me onto her bed as we began to passionately make out. …… It was close to midnight as I went into my house to grab a few things to take over to Sapphires. I tried to be as quiet as possible because I knew everypony would be asleep. I began to trot past the living room when I heard a quiet voice. “Where have you been White Cloud?” Golden was sitting in front of the fire, and I could hear the iciness of her voice. “I have been looking for you, but nopony could tell me where you have been.” I stopped in front of the living room doorway. “Why do you care? You don’t approve of who I spend time with.” Golden got up and slowly trotted over to me. “I care because of what you promised me! Of what you promise your brothers and sisters! Of what you promised our mother!” “Yeah, and what promise is that?” “The promise you made when I first found you! You swore to take care of this family and to try and make things right! To change things back to the way they were!” “My priorities have changed. I have Sapphire to think about now.” “Sapphire, Sapphire! That mare is the only pony you care about! You don’t care what happens to this family anymore?” She angrily brushed past me and stamped into the main hallway. “I do care! But you don’t like who I spend my time with! I love Sapphire, and she loves me!” Golden whipped around and stared daggers at me as tears began to flow down her cheeks. “No, she doesn’t! Can’t you see what she is doing to this family? She is tearing us apart! You don’t come around anymore, you stay away for weeks at a time, I never see you! Your brothers and sisters ask me every day where you are! How do I explain to them that you don’t care about them?” “I do care about this family. But Sapphire is going to become a part of this family. I have decided to ask her to marry me.” Golden looked shocked as I told her this. She was too stunned to say anything right away. Finally, she turned around as she began to cry harder. “I need you to leave. I don’t want you here anymore.” I was speechless. I slowly trotted over to her and tried to put my hoof on her shoulder, but she flinched away. “Golden, I…” She slowly trotted back into the living room. As she reached the doorway, I heard her say through gritted teeth, “Get…out…” And then she disappeared. I heard sobbing coming from the other room as I slowly turned and headed out of my house for the last time. …… I slowly made my way back to Sapphires. Her house was the only place left to me. As I went inside and shut the door behind me, I heard Sapphire call to me. “Is that you Cloudie? Can you come up here? I have something to show you.” I heard the coyness of her voice, but I was still in shock over the events that had just transpired. I slowly made my way upstairs to her bedroom. The door was slightly ajar, so I gently pushed it open. Sapphire was lying on her bed, surrounded by rose petals and scented candles. I heard gentle music playing as the candle light danced on the walls. “Do you like it Cloudie?” All of a sudden it hit me. Everything that we had been doing, what SHE had been doing. I finally saw everything for what it was. Sapphire was playing me, she hadn’t really changed. I saw her not as a beautiful mare that I wanted to marry, but an oily snake that was trying to pull me into its den. She was consuming me, and I had been blind to it all until now. Golden was right, she was trying to tear the family apart, and, she had succeeded. I thought back to what Golden had told me, how I was no longer around. I really had forgotten about my promise, and because of that I had lost everything that had mattered to me. My sister, my parents, my home, everything was gone. I was so angry. I didn’t know what to do, but I knew I had to leave. I couldn’t be around this snake any longer. I turned and began to make my way out of her house. I left the door open, not even caring if it got closed. “Cloudie, where are you going?” Her words fell on deaf ears as I headed out into the night air. I still heard her calling my name as I made my way down the street and to the train station. I thought about everything that had happened. When I had first gotten back, Golden really did believe that I could make things better, that I really could fix everything. But in the end, I just let her down. Just like I had let my parents down, I had let down the only other person that truly cared for me. The pain was so great that I began to weep as I slowly trotted down the street. I heard a train whistle close to me and I knew that I had arrived. The more I thought about it, the more it became evident in my mind. There was nothing left for me here. I had to head back to the one place that might still accept me. I knew that Ponyville was far away from Canterlot, far enough that I hoped my past could not follow me. I knew it was the one place I could go where my past could not follow. I had to head back…home. …… “There really isn’t any more to say. Pretty much I arrived back here and resumed my job. I buried myself in my work and tried to forget everything that had happened. The only thing that mattered to me was my work and my plants. I kept to myself, never wanting to be around anyone for fear I would just let them down. At least that was the case until I saw you. You changed everything, and I have not been the same since then.” I looked at Fluttershy as I finished the story. I was emotionally drained at this point, but I needed to hear her reaction. She just sat there, staring at nothing, and her face was devoid of emotion. “Fluttershy? Would you please say something?” I tried to wrap my hoof around her, but she got up off the couch and headed towards the door, never saying a word. I watched her as she trotted outside, closing the door behind her. I just sat there in shock, not sure what to think. I didn’t know what to say. I laid down on the couch as a sinking feeling hit my stomach and I felt sick. Oh Celestia, what have I done? > Chapter 12: The Pony and the Snake > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- What are you going to do Cloud? She left without saying a word. As I laid there on my couch, I felt very sick to my stomach as I realized I may have just made the worst possible choice to tell Fluttershy about me; to let her into the darkest parts of my being where very few ponies have tread. I had warned her that this was not a pleasant story, and in fact it was brutally painful. But I didn’t hold anything back. Every word I had spoken had been the absolute truth, and there was no way to take back any of it. For better or worse, it was out. I slowly removed the blanket that was over me and got to my hooves. I felt very shaky as I slowly trotted over to the window and looked out. It had begun to rain, which seemed an appropriate response to my mood. The gloominess of the sky reflected perfectly what I was feeling inside. It had not been my intention to push Fluttershy away. However, she had to know about me…the real me. I turned away from the window as the rain drops began to steadily pelt the glass and trotted into the kitchen. I thought about getting something to eat, but the rocks in my stomach quickly brushed that thought aside. Not really caring where I went, I trotted back into the living room and flopped onto the couch. I know that I had to do this, but was it the right time? Why did Sapphire have to show up right now? She should have just stayed in Canterlot and none of this would have happened. She may have just ruined the relationship that Fluttershy and I had. Arrgh… I grabbed a pillow and covered my head as the rain began to fall harder. I just wanted to leave and never come back. It seemed like no matter where I went my past kept popping up to remind me of all the horrible memories and poor decisions I had made. As tears began to form in my eyes, I tried to not think about those horrible memories; my mother’s death, my relationship with Sapphire, deserting my family not once but twice. What are you going to do? …… Several days passed and I stayed inside my house, not really feeling like working. I knew that nothing would be able to take my mind off of the events that had transpired. However, I had hoped that Fluttershy might come back and we would be able to talk about everything. I wanted to make sure that we were going to be alright. But I didn’t feel brave enough to go over to her cottage and try to talk to her. So I just sat at home, trying to shut out the memories that kept haunting my dreams. On day three of my self-imposed exile, I was rummaging around in my kitchen for something to eat when I heard a knock coming from my front door. My heart skipped a beat and I froze as my mind began to race. Could it be her? Could she finally have come back? What if it is her? What is she going to say? I stood frozen for several minutes until another knock broken my train of thoughts. I quickly swallowed the lump in my throat that had formed and slowly trotted over to the door. With my hoof shaking like a leaf in the wind, I hesitantly opened the door. It took my eyes a moment to adjust to the brightness outside. “Fluttershy, is that you?” I squinted my eyes and tried to see who it ways. But as the figure finally began to take shape, my heart sank and a bitterness crept into my voice. “It’s you Sapphire. Haven’t you caused enough trouble?” I began to close the door in her face, but her hoof slipped in-between the door and the frame, preventing me from fully closing it. “Oh Cloudie, is that any way to treat a former friend?” I could hear the silkiness dripping from her voice like venom from a snake. “I just came by to talk, that’s all.” “I don’t want to talk to you, and I never want to see you again. Now go back to Canterlot where you belong. I’m sure you have some other defenseless colt to ensnare.” I began to put more pressure on the door, trying to close it. But her hoof would not budge. “Dear Cloudie, you have me all wrong. I’m a different pony now, a changed pony. After you left, I nearly died without you. But I soon got over you and moved on to something different. Now I am the Chairpony for the Education of Little Fillies in Canterlot. We take them and shape them into the mares of the future. I do a lot of good things now and I just wanted to come by and talk. I really have no agenda.” I didn’t want to believe her. She had snatched me up when my grief over the loss of my mother was still fresh in my mind. She preyed on my helplessness and torment, and I had ultimately abandoned everyone I truly cared about. I wasn’t about to make that same mistake again. But there was a small part of me that thought she might have really changed. It finally convinced me, over my better judgement, to release the door and once again open it. “Fine, you can come in. But you are not staying long.” I stepped to the side as she slowly trotted in and set her bag down. “Thank you Cloud.” “Now, you had something you wanted to say. Spit it out and then leave.” I really did not want her here any longer than was absolutely necessary. “Sigh, right to the point.” She turned and looked at me, and I could smell her perfume wafting towards me. It was a very intoxicating scent that reminded me of a field of flowers just after a lite spring shower. But I quickly brushed that image aside and focused back on Sapphire. “I know things between us got rather…complicated. I just absolutely feel awful about what happened, and I wanted to come and apologize. What I did was the worst thing imaginable, and I feel like I am the one responsible for driving you and your family apart.” She looked down at her hooves as she continued. “I really did have feelings for you Cloud, that part was true. But everything else was a sham. I feel so awful about the damage I caused.” I could see tears beginning to well up in her eyes as she raised her head and looked at me. I could feel a pang of guilt begin to enter into my head as I listened to her. If she is crying, then maybe she really does feel guilty. Maybe I was wrong to so quickly judge her. As the tears began to flow down her cheeks, I could hear a tremble in her voice. “I’m so sorry Cloud. I know there isn’t anything I can do to change the past, but maybe we can start anew.” The guilt fully washed over me as I stood there looking at her crying. I quickly rushed over and put my hoof around her shoulders. “I forgive you Sapphire. And it wasn’t just you. I let myself get dragged into things that were terrible choices. I made the decisions, not you.” “That’s kind of you to say Cloud. You don’t know how much guilt this has been weighing on my shoulders. It has haunted me for so many years. But I finally feel like you have helped remove this burden.” She smiled at me as I brushed the tears from her cheeks. “Don’t worry anymore about it.” She picked up her bag and started to make her way over to the door. “It’s getting late. I really should head back to the inn.” I trotted over and opened the door. Once she was on the porch, she turned around and once again smiled at me. “You really have no idea how much this means to me.” She leaned over and gave me a lingering kiss on the cheek. After a moment, she whispered into my ear. “I hope I see you soon Cloudie.” It was then that I saw a familiar figure on the path to my house. Fluttershy was standing there, and I could see tears streaming down her face. My heart sank like a stone as I realized that Sapphire had played me for a fool. I snarled at her as I pushed her away from me. It was then that Fluttershy quickly turned and sprinted down the lane, letting out soft sobs as she ran. I tried to sprint after her, but she was too far ahead. I called after her, but either she didn’t hear me or she chose to ignore me. I stared after her for a few moments, unsure of what to do. But then I remembered the mare that was behind me. I spun and sprinted up to her, slamming her against the side of my house and pinning her. “What have you done?!?” I snarled at her. She started laughing as I held her there. “Oh Cloudie, you really have no idea.” I pushed my muzzle right up to hers and stared daggers into her cold, dark eyes. “I know exactly what you have done. You played me. You didn’t mean a word of what you said in there. You just couldn’t leave your poor, helpless "Cloudie" alone to live his life. You had to come and ruin everything once again because you want me. Well Sapphire, I telling you right now. LEAVE…ME…ALONE… I want nothing to do with you.” She once again began laughing as I teetered on the edge of slamming my hoof into her pretty face. “You think I’m joking?” “Nothing of the sort Cloudie. But you should know, I had a little chat with your little filly friend. She didn’t want to talk to me at first, but I was able to talk my way into her cottage. We had the most delightful little chat. I told her that you weren’t really interested in her and that you only wanted to be with me. She didn’t believe me at first, but I told her that I could prove to her that you still had feelings for me. So I brought her over here and told her to watch. And that’s when I put on the performance of a lifetime! The tears, the apology, the trembling voice, it was all for her Cloudie. And then the lingering kiss on the cheek and the whisper in the ear sealed the deal. As you can see, she bought every single part of it.” She sneered at me as she continued. “And now there is no pony between us Cloudie. No pony will ever love you like she did. I’m your only option now.” I let her go as tears began to flow from my eyes. “Why Sapphire? Do you enjoy seeing me in pain? Do you want to ruin every single thing that makes me happy?” She dusted herself off and came over to me. “No Cloud, I just want to be with you. I want you all to myself. And now, there is nothing stopping us from being together.” She began to laugh once more as she trotted off the porch and down the lane. I could hear her echoing as she rounded a corner and disappeared. I couldn’t stand, I felt so defeated. I was now weeping uncontrollably as I covered my head with my hooves. I lost the pony I loved, my past was now my present, and my future looked bleak. Things could get no worse. > Chapter 13: Never Poke a Quiet Pony > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Once I was finally able to calm myself, I started thinking about how I was going to salvage this situation. How did things end up spiraling out of control so fast? I wiped the remainder of the tears from my eyes and went back inside my house to try and think of some way to talk to Fluttershy and explain everything. I must look like a two-timing jerk to her. How can she trust me now after seeing the charade that Sapphire put on for her? I sank into my chair as I let out a giant groan of frustration. Come on Cloud, think! There has got to be some way to resolve this catastrophe! Maybe I should try to talk to her, explain my side of the story. She saw the show, now let’s show her the truth behind the curtain… …… I quickly left my house and made my way through Ponyville and up to Fluttershy’s cottage. The sun was just beginning to set as I trotted up to the door and prepared to knock. However, I heard a sound that made me pause just as my hoof was about to hit the door. I put my ear to the door to try and distinguish what had made me stop. I listened for a moment, and then I heard it. And what I heard made my heart sink lower than anything had ever before. Fluttershy was crying. I could hear her sobs coming through the door as I stood there listening, and it tore my heart apart. What have I done? How can I possibly try to comfort her? I know that it was all a show…a scam. But from her eyes, it looked real. How can I honestly explain what happened? And even if I did find the words to say, would she believe me? Would she take me back? I stood there frozen. My mind kept racing, trying to figure out the words to say. But as I stood there listening, her cries continued to pierce my very soul. I had to go in there. I had to do something…anything to get her to stop crying. I had to tell her the truth. Even if she still rejected me, she had to know what had really happened. Taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly, and shaking like a leaf, I once again raised my hoof and lightly knocked on the door. I heard a quiet, trembling “Go away” come from inside the cottage. “Fluttershy, it’s me…White Cloud. I want to talk to you.” I sounded very unsure of myself as I spoke. When her sobs continued, I spoke once again. “Fluttershy, I know how it must have looked, but you have it all wrong, I don’t love her anymore.” I continued to hear her crying inside, and it was tearing me apart. I didn’t want to see her hurt like this, but I knew that I was the one that had caused all of this. You have to get in there Cloud. You have to get her to understand. I knew that I was getting nowhere just standing here and trying to talk to her through the door. So once again, I took a deep breath and opened the door. I saw her laying on her couch, face down, with Angel sitting next to her. When I came in, Angel rushed over and began trying to push me out the door. However, I wasn’t going to give up that easily. “Fluttershy, I need to talk to you.” She bolted off the couch and shot behind it as I continued to hear her sobbing. “I....I k-know what I s-saw Cloud. I knew t-that this was t-to good for m-me. I k-knew that nopony could ever l-lo…lo…” She couldn’t even finish her sentence as a stronger wave of sobbing erupted from her. I almost burst into tears as she continued crying. I started to trot towards the couch when she lifted up from behind it and stared daggers at me. I froze, I had never seen this side of Fluttershy before and it frightened me. The sweet and innocent Fluttershy I had known had transformed into this nightmarish beast. She began to speak to me and her voice sent shivers down my spine. “I know what I saw Cloud. You and that mare were talking for an awfully long time and then I saw her kiss you when you both came out of your house. I bet you couldn’t wait to get back with her. And all it took was her sweet innocent glance and a flick of her glamorous tail to get back together. I bet she didn’t tell you that she came and talked with me, did she?” Fluttershy began to advance towards me as a snarl appeared on her face. I started slowly backing up as she came closer. “Fluttershy, it was all a misunderstanding!” I pleaded with her. “You don’t know the whole story!” But I could tell that my words were falling on deaf ears. “I do know the whole story. She told me every word of it. How you have been in contact with her for all these years. How you have written to her telling her that you love her and want so desperately to be with her. I bet you think it was a hilarious joke, getting to be with me. ‘Oh, let’s play with the poor, sweet, shy Pegasus and see how badly we can hurt her.’” I found myself unable to move as I hit one of the cottage walls. Fluttershy was now in my face and I could feel the heat of her anger as she leaned in towards me. “Well Cloud, you can’t hurt me anymore. We are through.” And then tears began to well up in her eyes as she continued to stare at me. “You hurt me Cloud. You hurt me more than anything ever has in my life. You broke my heart. I loved you Cloud, I really thought we had something. But now I know the truth. You never loved me, you thought this was all one big joke.” She started to slowly back away as she began to cry once more. “How could you Cloud? How could you do this to me?” She finally reached her couch and at back down on it as she buried her hooves into her eyes. I cleared my throat as I stared at her. No words entered my head as I stood there, unable to think of anything that could comfort her. The sounds of her weeping were like knives piercing my heart. I had to say something. Even if she didn’t believe me, I couldn’t just stand there. I slowly trotted over to the couch and sat on the opposite side. “Fluttershy, please let me explain.” I started softly. “What you saw was not real. What you think you saw was just a show that she put on for you. I don’t love Sapphire, I never really loved her. She took advantage of my grief after my mother had passed and I fell right into her hooves. It wasn’t true love, nothing like we had. I really had feelings for you Fluttershy. I still do. And seeing you broken over something like this makes me ache inside.” Fluttershy continued to cry as I stared at the floor, trying to compose what I would say next. “Do you remember the first time we met? You came up to me while I was working in the Ponyville flowerbeds and tried to tell me how much you loved my flowers. I remember that day vividly. I was so happy that you had come over to talk to me, but I was also incredibly scared. I had always looked at you from afar, but I never thought that you would actually talk to me. Heh, I guess I just thought it was a dream that would never come true. But then when you gave me back my bag at the café, I knew that you were the one for me. I could feel it in my heart that we were supposed to be together.” I ran my hoof through my mane as I smiled and remembered the good times we had together. “Do you remember the day at Sugar Cube Corner? I tell you, that is a day I will never forget. When I saw you under all those pots, it was so funny to me! It was also one of your cuter moments. When you looked so embarrassed, I knew I couldn’t just leave you there. And that is why I offered to help you. I wanted so much to just be near you, and that was a perfect opportunity.” Fluttershy’s sobs began to lessen as I talked about our past together. She finally removed her hooves as she slowly turned and looked at me. “But…what about w-what I saw on your p-porch? It l-looked like you and Sapphire w-were back together.” I sighed as I began to explain to her what had happened after she had rushed off crying. As I went through everything Sapphire had told me, I could see a little of the anger that shortly ago had been directed at me begin to manifest on her face. “Are you still angry at me Fluttershy?” I said nervously as I began to back up again. “No Cloud, but Sapphire is going to pay. That mare tried to tear us apart and I will not let her think she has won.” Her face began to soften a little as she then looked into my eyes. “I’m so sorry Cloud. I should have had more trust in you. After how you described her in your story, I should have known that she was up to no good. But I tend to easily trust other ponies, and it has gotten me into trouble more than once. But I trust you Cloud. I know that you will never hurt me. You really do care about me and don’t want to ever see me hurt.” She smiled as she scooted over to me and gave me a small light kiss on the muzzle. I breathed a heavy sigh of relief as she leaned back and looked me dead in the eyes. “Now let’s go have a little chat with Ms. Sapphire. I think her and I have something to talk about.” > Chapter 14: The Final Showdown > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- It didn’t take long to locate Sapphire. Word of a rich pony staying in Ponyville had spread like wildfire. It wasn’t every day that a rich pony from Canterlot visited. We found out that she had been staying in the Neighborly Inn, but that things had not been going smoothly for them. As we trotted up to the door, a young colt burst through the door, breathing heavily and obviously flustered. “Excuse me! I need to get to Sugar Cube Corner! Pardon me!” He yelled out loudly as he began to weave his way through the Ponyville crowd. Fluttershy and I exchanged puzzled glances as we stepped into utter chaos. The inn was a bustle of activity as curious onlookers and reporters stood inside the lobby, talking amongst themselves. As we made our way through the crowd, we were able to catch snippets of a few of the conversations. “I hear she is part of the royal family, and is here on behalf of Princess Celestia.” “That’s right, a rich out of towner! Here in Ponyville! What could be so important as to draw somepony of her stature here?” “All day every day, it’s the same thing. ‘Fetch me this! Fetch me that!’ It’s like she thinks she owns the place! Also, she doesn’t tip anypony!” Fluttershy and I both knew exactly who they were talking about. As we made our way over to the counter, there was a haggard looking clerk talking to several ponies, obviously very frustrated. “I know you want to see her, but she has requested absolute privacy! It is the policy of this inn to not give out our patrons’ information! Now please leave, I am a very busy pony!” The ponies turned and began to slowly trot away as they wore faces of disappointment. As the clerk turned around to write in a book, we finally reached the counter. I loudly cleared my throat to try and get the clerks attention. When he didn’t turn around, I tried again, even louder. The clerk finally whipped around, staring daggers at us. “I told you, you can’t see her!” Fluttershy and I both took a step back as the clerk continued to fume at us. I looked at Fluttershy nervously and then back to the clerk. “Ummm, heh, I can see you’re busy, but we need to see Sapphire. My name is White Cloud. I’m an old…friend…of hers from Canterlot.” The clerk was taken aback at the mention of my name. “White Cloud? Ah, I was told to be expecting you.” The clerk pulled out a small piece of paper and wrote a number and a letter on it and quickly passed it to me. “Here’s her room number. Make sure no pony gets this, or we’ll have a riot on our hooves. Oh, and one more thing…your friend has to stay here. I was told to admit no pony except for you.” I looked over and Fluttershy as she came up to the counter and stared the clerk dead in the eyes. “You’re going to let me up there. I have a few things to say to Sapphire, and no pony is going to stop me. Got that?” The clerk took a few steps back in fear. “O-Of course. Go right up!” We turned around and began to wade through the crowd towards the staircase leading up to the rooms. Once we made it to the top, away from the crowd, I opened up the paper and looked at the number. “Room D 24; looks like it’s just down the hall.” I turned and looked at Fluttershy. “I don’t know what you intend to say to her, but please be careful. She almost tore us apart, and I don’t want to see that happen again.” Fluttershy had a determined look on her face as she stared down the hall. “Don’t worry Cloud, I’ll have you there. Nothing can tear us apart when we’re together.” I smiled a little at this, but it quickly diminished as Fluttershy began to make her way down the hall. Silently counting the doors numbers, we finally stood in front of the dreaded D 24. I turned to look at Fluttershy once more. “Are you sure about this?” I softly asked. Fluttershy looked at me as a wave of anger washed over her face and her eyes became hard. “Cloud, she tried to tear us apart. She broke your heart, as well as mine. I won’t let somepony come between us and break what we have. I love you Cloud, more than ever.” She leaned over and gently kissed me on the cheek. “Now, let’s go.” Trembling, I slowly lifted a hoof and knocked. I heard a rustling noise come from the other side of the door and a chain was soon being lifted. “I hope that’s the cake I wanted….” The door opened and Sapphire Desire stood in the doorway. “Oh…it’s YOU.” She said with venom dripping from her lips. “I didn’t expect you so soon. I must be slipping.” She smiled a silky smile as she stared at Fluttershy. “Did you like the little show I put on for you? I think it was one of my better performances.” She batted her eyes at me as I shrunk back, afraid of what she was going to do. But Fluttershy started to step into the room. “I think there’s some things we need to discuss Sapphire. Some things that I think need to be cleared up.” I reluctantly began to follow Fluttershy, trying not to brush against Sapphire as we trotted in. I felt her tail come up and over my back as I flinched and started to trot a little faster. Once we were inside, Sapphire closed the door and trotted over to a luxurious couch and sat down. “Won’t you have a seat? Sadly, there’s room for only one more on the couch.” As she stared at me and patted the seat next to her. “Don’t try your games Sapphire, we can see right through your façade. It isn’t going to work this time.” Sapphire looked a little hurt as she laid back and got more comfortable. “Oh well, one could dream. But tell me dear, what did you want to talk to me about? It seemed awfully important.” Fluttershy drew closer to Sapphire as she started to speak. “I want you to leave Ponyville. I want you to leave us alone. I want you to never step hoof in our lives.” Fluttershy looked at me. “Tell her Cloud. Tell her what you have wanted to say for so many years.” I cleared my throat as panic started to set in. How could I talk to the one pony who had ruined so much of my life and had nearly tore me away from the one pony I wanted to spend the rest of my life with? But Fluttershy was right, I needed to confront her. I needed to get closure. I cleared my throat and began to speak. “Sapphire, I have made some terrible decisions in my life. I can’t blame you for everything that happened. A lot of what I did was my choice and I’m going to have to live with that. But, you were the worst thing that could have happened to me. You preyed on me in my most vulnerable hour. You took advantage of my grief and twisted it into something that you wanted. You didn’t care about me. All you cared about was controlling me, using me to tear my family apart. I was blind to what you did back then, but I see it clearly now. You used me, you used my family, and now you used the one pony I truly love. Given enough time, I might have been able to forgive the first time, but this time you have pushed things too far. I…Don’t…Want…To…Be…With…You. Can I make that any clearer? I want to be with Fluttershy, and she wants to be with me. We love each other, and that is something you will never be able to break.” As I was speaking, Sapphire just kept smiling. When I finished, she sat up and began to clap her hooves. “Bravo! Wonderful speech! Tell me, how long have you wanted to tell me that? Don’t tell me; it was the night you ran away for good, wasn’t it?” She stood up and trotted over to Fluttershy. “And you would rather be with her over me?” She glared at Fluttershy as she began to circle her. “What does she have that I don’t have? Look at me! I’m gorgeous, wealthy, a pony of high standing in society, and highly sought after. What does she have to offer? She’s easy to manipulate, shy, afraid of her own shadow, and she stays with all those, ugh, filthy animals. Is this the pony you want to spend the rest of your life with? Really?” Sapphire finished her circle and stood in front of me. I could smell the perfume she had on, but it had no effect on me. “Be honest here Cloudie, clearly I’m the better pony here. You will never find a better pony than me. I can give you money, respect, and fame. She can give you smelly animals, a pony that is afraid of her own shadow, and will jump at every single thing that you do. Heh, just look at her; she’s so pathetic!” At this, Sapphire began to laugh hysterically. I was on the edge of totally losing control, but when I looked at Fluttershy her eyes helped me regain my composure. I turned and got in front of Sapphire and looked her in her eyes. “You will never be half as good as Fluttershy is. All you care about is yourself. You care more about getting more and more stuff than the people around you. And if you can’t have what you want, you will sneak, lie, and connive your way into getting it. Fluttershy is the best thing that has ever happened to me. She actually cares for me and loves me. Her emotions are not fake and dripping with deceit. I love to be around her. I love to just sit and talk with her. No agendas, no fakery, just two ponies who deeply love each other. And that is something I hope you are able to experience at some point in your life. She is beautiful is so many ways, and that’s why I love her.” I looked over at Fluttershy as a tear began to roll down her face. She wore a soft smile that in turn made me smile. “I love her Sapphire. I will never leave her, not for anything.” I could feel my eyes beginning to water a little as I once again looked at Sapphire. "Please, just leave us in peace. That’s all I have to say.” I trotted over to the door and slowly turned around to look at Fluttershy. “Are you ready to go?” Fluttershy nodded and began to trot towards the door. Just as we were both about to leave, I heard a quiet “Wait…” We paused and turned around. Sapphire was sitting on the couch, covering her face with her hooves. I could tell that she was weeping as she sat there. I glanced at Fluttershy, and she nodded to me. I trotted over and laid a hoof on Sapphires shoulder as she softly began to speak to me. “C-Cloud, I don’t know what to s-say. I see it now. T-The love you two h-have for each other. I understand now. I have b-been such a fool. What you and I had wasn’t r-real. It was just an illusion.” She looked up at me and what I saw surprised me. She was telling the truth. I don’t know how I knew, but I knew. Sapphire really had finally gotten it. I smiled as I looked at her. “Sapphire, I really did mean what I said. I really do hope that you finally get to experience what Fluttershy and I have for real. It is the best feeling you can have, and it really has changed me. I’m sure you will find your own special somepony. I’m sure he’s out there, just waiting for you.” Sapphire looked past me at Fluttershy and smiled. “You take care of him Fluttershy. Never let him go.” I turned to see Fluttershy nod. I turned back and looked at Sapphire for what would be the last time. “Have a safe trip” I softly said as Fluttershy and I both trotted out of the room. As I shut the door behind us, I let out a huge sigh of relief. I turned and looked at Fluttershy as we began to trot down the hallway. “You know, I really did mean every word I said in there about you.” Fluttershy began to blush as she looked away. “I know Cloud. You see what so many ponies don’t see. You see the good qualities about me and don’t care about the bad ones.” I smiled as we reached the stairs and made our way down. “It’s why I want to be with you. You’re just so cute when you’re embarrassed.” Fluttershy let out a little giggle as we stepped out of the inn and began to make our way to a bench in Ponyville Square. We sat on the bench and looked at all of the blooming flowers and watched the hummingbirds dancing around the petals. I leaned over and gave Fluttershy a quick peck on the cheek. “You really are the best thing that has happened to me.” She turned and looked at me with those big blue eyes and said, “You’re the best thing that has happened to me too, Cloud.” And with that, she kissed me. > Chapter 15: Memories of an Earth Pony > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- It had been several weeks since the events of Sapphire Desire had happened, and things seemed to be returning back to normal. Every day, Fluttershy and I grew more and more in love as we spent many of our days together. I never wanted to be apart from her, and it seemed she felt the same. However, there had been something in the works from me; something that, if it went off just right would make me the happiest stallion in all of Equestria. I paced around my living room and once again stopped at my desk. I pulled open my drawer and breathed a sigh of relief as the object I stared at was still sitting where I had put it. I closed the drawer back up, but once again started to pace. I don’t know if I can do it. I don’t know if it’s the right time. What if she says no? What does that mean these months have been? I couldn’t keep my mind from racing with thoughts as I once again completed a circuit of the room. If I do this, it has to be perfect. Nothing can go wrong! I still felt incredibly nervous, but I figured it was only going to get worse the longer I trotted around. I went over to the desk, opened the drawer, and pulled the object out. Being ever so gentle, I took it and placed it in the bottom of one of my saddle bags. The butterflies in my stomach intensified as I placed the bags on my back and opened my front door. As I stepped outside, the air seemed stifling. I started down the lane and turned onto the road that led towards Ponyville. I tried to calm myself down, but the butterflies would have nothing to do with that. My legs felt rubbery with each step that brought me closer to the town. As I neared the square, I began to feel the sudden urge to run back to my house and forget the whole thing. It’s never going to work Cloud. She’s going to say no. I swallowed a large lump in my throat that had formed as I crossed the crowded square and made my way over to Fluttershy’s cottage. As her home came into view, I closed my eyes and turned around. There it is! Oh, I don’t know if I can do this. How is she going to react? Is she going to run away without a word? No Cloud, you have to do this. It’s time. Now pull yourself together, and knock on the door. I felt slightly better as I took a deep breath and trotted up to the door. Knocking lightly, I heard Fluttershy say, “I’ll be out in a minute.” I waited for a moment until I heard hooves heading towards the door. As it silent opened, I smiled as I saw Fluttershy standing there. “Hello Cloud! You ready for our picnic?” I patted my saddle bags. “Got everything we need right here. You ready to go?” I hoped the nervousness I felt didn’t come through my voice, but Fluttershy didn’t seem to notice if it had. She smiled as she turned around and spoke. “Now Angel, I will be back later to feed all of you. You behave while I’m out.” I saw Angel hop into view as he saluted Fluttershy. She smiled as she closed the door and turned back to me. “So, where do you want to go today?” I began to shake a little; it was starting. “Well, I was thinking about that hill where we had our first picnic together. It’s such a beautiful day, and I’m sure the view is breathtaking.” Fluttershy thought for a moment, and I was afraid she was going to suggest a different location. “That sounds wonderful Cloud.” I let out a silent sigh of relief as Fluttershy began to trot away. That was close Cloud. Hopefully everything else will go smoothly. …… We finally made it to the top of the hill just as the sun was beginning to set. It was just like when we had our first date together. I quickly laid out the blanket and began to unpack the food I had prepared. I tried to recreate everything that we had on that first night. It had taken me a while to remember everything, but it had turned out perfect. As we sat on the blanket and talked, the sun was slowly beginning to slip past the horizon. The river was sparkling, like it was filled with thousands of gems. The sky had turned beautiful shades of orange and pink and the forest looked so peaceful. I stared at Fluttershy as she downed the last piece of her apple and gently wiped her mouth with a napkin. “That was wonderful Cloud.” She stared out over the scenery as I started to stack up everything. “You know, I have always loved this spot. It’s just so breathtaking. But what makes it even better is when you’re here with me to share it.” She turned and smiled at me. I sat there as the butterflies returned, and in greater force. I was shaking like a leaf and my heart was racing. But it was time. “Fluttershy, I think I left the dessert in my saddle bags. Would you mind grabbing it for me?” My heart skipped a beat when she didn’t answer right away, but it was just a few seconds before she got up and headed over to the bags. I watched her intently as she reached the bags, opened the pouch, and stuck a hoof in. “I don’t feel anything Cloud.” Oh no, did it fall out on our way up here? My mind started racing, trying to think of where it might have gotten lost. But then I heard, “Cloud?” I looked, and she had pulled it out. “Cloud? What is this?” I quickly got up and trotted over to her. Taking it from her, I got down on a knee. “Fluttershy…from the day I first saw you, I knew you were the one pony for me. You looked so beautiful, but I was afraid to talk to you. But once you spoke to me, I knew I couldn’t let you go. Each and every day, I long to be near you, to spend time with you. And every day, I find something new about you that deepens my love for you. We have been through some rough times, but each time we come out stronger. I love you Fluttershy. I love you more than ever, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. So I have one question. Will you marry me?” My heart was beating so hard I thought it was going to burst from my chest. At first Fluttershy stood there in stunned silence. She made no sound and was as solid as a statue. I couldn’t tell what she was thinking, and my heart began to sink. She’s going to say no. I knew it…. But then I saw tears begin to well up in her eyes. I was still wary, but my hopes began to rise one more. A smile began to form on her face as she trotted up to me and I held my breath as she leaned in. “Yes.” It was so quiet I thought I was just imagining it. But then she spoke a little louder. “Yes!” I felt like letting out a whoop of joy as I slid the ring onto her hoof. Standing up, I grabbed her in the tightest hug and began to fiercely kiss her. “Yes Cloud! I will marry you!” She said in-between kisses. My face wore the biggest grin it could produce as I stepped back and tried to catch my breath. We stared at each other as the moment continued to sink in. The sun had finally finished setting and the full moon was surrounded by the twinkling of millions of stars. “Fluttershy, you have no idea how happy you have made me.” She trotted over to me and gently kissed me on the mouth. “You have no idea how happy you have made me.” As we kissed under the stars, a small thought began to worm its way into my head. …… It was several days later and Fluttershy was already hard at work beginning preparations for the wedding. I tried to stay out of her way unless she asked for my opinion on something. But on this day, that little thought had finally blossomed into a fully realized thought. I knew I had to do this before the wedding, but I didn’t know how Fluttershy was going to react. When I was finally able to catch her at a low point, I sat her down on her couch. “Fluttershy, I feel there is something I need to do before we get married. Something I should have done a long time ago.” Fluttershy looked a little puzzled. “What is so important Cloud?” I cleared my throat as I explained my plan. After a moment, Fluttershy said, “Your right Cloud. You do need to do this. You need to find closure for this part of your past.” She gently kissed me on the cheek. “I will be with you Cloud, even if I’m not physically there.” A small tear began to well up in my eyes as I said good bye and headed to the train station. I dreaded what I had to do, but this needed to be done so that I could put that part of my life behind me. …… As I walked up to the door, I wanted to just turn and run away and not have to face what I had come here to do. I hadn’t been this nervous since I had proposed to Fluttershy. Clearing my throat, I steeled myself for what might happen and gently knocked on the door. For a brief moment, I feared no one was home, but then I heard hooves on a wooden floor coming towards the door. I heard a lock click and then the door began to swing open. I immediately recognized the pony that stood in the doorway. “Can I help you?” I smiled as I stared at the mare in front of me. It had been many years since I had last seen her, but she was still just as beautiful. “Hello Golden Mane.” She was visibly startled as she took a step back. “H-How do you know my name? Who are you?” I cleared my throat once more. “It’s me, White Cloud.” She seemed to ponder this for a moment, and then she did the most unexpected thing. A look of shock came on her face as she sprinted out to me and embraced me. I could hear her beginning to cry as she tried to speak. “White C-Cloud? Is it really you?” Her crying intensified as I stood there with my sisters hooves wrapped around me. I was in shock. This isn’t what I was expecting. I was expecting the door to be slammed in my face or to be screamed at in rage. What’s going on? When it seemed that Golden’s crying was easing away, I gently pushed her away. “It really is me Golden.” I smiled at her as she wiped away the few tears still rolling down her face. “I didn’t recognize you. It’s been so long since I last saw you. You cut your mane. I like it.” “Could we go inside? There’s some things I want to talk to you about.” Golden smiled at my suggestion. “Of course! Come in, Come in!” She quickly rushed back inside as I followed behind her at a slower pace. I hadn’t stepped foot inside this house for many years, and it held so many terrible and painful memories. But I tried to brush those aside as I walked through the hallway and into the entrance hall. The house felt much warmer than it was the last time I had seen it. The curtains were all drawn away and sunlight poured in through the tall windows. It felt like a home that was cared for and well loved. Golden beckoned me towards the study as I stood looking around. I slowly trotted in and stood there as she went and sat on the couch. “You can sit here Cloud.” She said, patting the cushion next to her. “I’m sure you have lots to say.” I wasn’t really sure where to begin. But I did know that I couldn’t leave here until I had repaired the damage I had done. I trotted over and sat down, but I couldn’t look her in the eye. Golden seemed to notice this. “What is it Cloud?” I felt guilt begin to rise up in my as I took and deep breathe and dived in. “Golden, I don’t know any way to make this better. That night that I left, I was a broken pony. It doesn’t excuse my actions, and I have to live with what I did. But what I did was wrong, and you need to know this. I regret everything I did. And leaving you alone with the rest of the family was the worst decision I have ever made. It has haunted me every day since I left.” I felt tears begin to form in my eyes as I continued. “I regret never saying goodbye. I regret everything that happened with Sapphire. Everything I did was horrible and irresponsible. I’m not going to make excuses for what I did. And I know that nothing I can say will ever reverse what I did. But you have to know how sorry I am. I am so sorry I left you when you needed me the most. I’m sorry for abandoning you and leaving you to care for the family on your own.” I began to weep as I covered my eyes with my hooves. All I could say was, “I’m sorry…I’m so sorry.” I continued to repeat this over and over, when I felt a hoof wrap around my shoulders. I uncovered my eyes to see Golden staring at me as tears rolled down her face. “Cloud…I don’t know what to say. When you left, I was furious. I hated you for everything you had done. And it wasn’t easy raising our siblings on my own, but I couldn’t abandon them. I stuck to it and raised them the best way I knew how. It was so hard, but in the end it was worth it. I was finally able to forgive you Cloud. After a long time, I was finally able to do it. It wasn’t easy, but you are still part of this family.” She stared into my eyes as she drew closer. “I know how much the pain of losing mother hit you. I could see it in your eyes every time I saw you trot by. You’re my brother Cloud…and nothing is going to change that. No matter what you did, I still love you. It’s taken me many years to come to this, but I do forgive you. I’ve missed you Cloud.” She then wrapped both hooves around me and whispered into my ear. “I love you Cloud, and I’ve missed you. Welcome home.” …… I called up Fluttershy to see how she was doing. She said that her friends were really helping to take a lot of the stress away. Several days had passed as I talked with Golden for many hours, catching her up on everything that I had done. I told her that she was invited to the wedding and her eyes lit up just like I had seen them do when we were foals. She seemed so excited to meet Fluttershy, and I told her that the two of them would get along wonderfully. On the third day, I had to get back to Ponyville and help Fluttershy with whatever she needed. As Golden and I stood on the train platform, she had tears in her eyes as we said out goodbyes. I told her I would see her soon as I boarded the train and it pulled out of the station. As I sat in the train car thinking about everything that had gone on, it brought a smile to my face. I knew that I could finally have peace about Golden and my past, and I knew my future was going to be bright. As I closed my eyes to catch some sleep on my way back to Ponyville, the vision of Golden standing on the platform waving goodbye was forefront in my mind. As the train rolled on gently rocking me to sleep, I knew that everything was going to be ok. …… Stop fidgeting Cloud! You’re going to mess up your suit! The collar was unbearably close to my throat as I stood on the stairs waiting. It felt like I was being choked by soft fabric as my heart beat like a thousand drums. The crowd that was seated in front of me was quietly murmuring amongst themselves as we waited patiently. Finally a hush went over the crowd as a flock of brightly colored birds landed on several layers of a bird perch. After the last one had landed, they began to sing a gentle, soothing tune as the crowd stood and turned around. The doors opened revealing a sight that took my breath away. Fluttershy stood on the other sided, garbed in a flowing green dress with a long train. Her head was wreathed in daisies and she wore an emerald necklace. As she began to slowly make her way up the aisle, more birds flew in behind her and lifted up her train. My smile widened as she neared the steps and then began to climb them. Once she reached my side, I stared into her beautiful green eyes as we climbed the last few steps together. The vows were short and simple, but they were words that everypony in that building would remember. As we were pronounced as husband and wife, we had a long and passionate kiss as the crowd burst into cheers and applause. We turned, hoof in hoof, smiling like fools as we quickly trotted down the steps and out the door. We then made our way to the reception as the crowd began to drift in. The party had been put together by the only pony who knew how to do a party right. As Pinkie began to MC the festivities, we began to slowly make our rounds to everypony that had attended. As we neared the end, Fluttershy saw her friends dancing to the music. They came over and hugged Fluttershy tightly. “That was one great ceremony, sugar cube. I don’t think ah ever seen a more beautiful sight.” Fluttershy blushed a little at this compliment. “You’re so lucky Fluttershy! You got an awesome stallion!” Rainbow exclaimed excitedly as she hovered above. “It’s true darling! He is not hard on the eyes.” Rarity was eyeing me, and it made me blush a little. “Rarity!” Twilight exclaimed. She then turned and hugged Fluttershy once more. “I’m so happy for you Fluttershy. I hope one day I can find my special somepony.” “I’m sure you will Twilight.” Fluttershy said quietly. All of a sudden, a pink blur came streaking past me and right up to Fluttershy. “I’m so excited for you! You were so pretty and the birds were lovely and the flowers smelled good and then the kissing and the clapping and the cheering! I hope you like the party! I pulled out all the stops! I’m just so excited!” Pinkie was bouncing all over the place as she continued to talk. Finally Applejack was able to get her to calm down. “Ah think we better leave these two love birds alone.” “I agree Applejack.” Rarity said as she sipped her tea. Each pony then hugged Fluttershy once more and then headed off to mingle. “Well, I think that’s everypony.” I said, glancing around before I leaned over and gave Fluttershy a kiss. “Oh Cloud, this day is the happiest I have ever been.” She smiled at me as we stood there and watched everypony talking, eating, and dancing. The rest of the evening was a blur as we cut the wedding cake and then danced to a couple songs. When a carriage pulled up and a white stallion opened the door, we quickly said our goodbyes and stepped inside. The stallion shut the door and soon we were on our way to our honeymoon. As we sat in the back and just held each other, both of us had the same thought going through our heads. This night is perfect…