...is the annoyance of ponies.
One Robots Obsession
By Mr 101
[The events in the Big MT take place before the Courier arrives.]
It was a quiet evening in the Big MT, the sun was settling and the various creatures where settling down for the long night that lay ahead. The Cazadores retreated back into their nests, Spore Carriers hunkered down in the remains of a building and the Night Stalkers slowly emerged from their caves, yawning and ready to hunt for their food.
In a large building that dominated the central area of the manmade crater two robotic creations, one resembling that of an ordinary toaster and the other a tiny securitron with an adorable cartoon mug for his facial image faced a large tank holding a strange contraption. They remained in silence as they eyed it up and down, the small robot tapping his mechanical finger on his screen in thought.
“So…if I use this…I can get my revenge on that asshole Doctor 0?” Muggy asked stroking his screen.
The toaster tried its best not to break into fits of maniacal laughter as he replied.
“Oh yes Muggy, use this and you’ll get your revenge.”
“And then I’ll be able to find that storage closet you said Doctor 0 had all those coffee mugs in it.” Muggy shivered in happiness as he said the words coffee mugs.
“Yep, all the mugs you could ever want.” He lied.
The Toaster knew that there was no such closet; he just liked using mugs as a way to get Muggy to do things for him due to his lack of arms. Muggy paused for a moment and tapped his screen thinking.
“Well what does it even fucking do?” Muggy turned to him feeling his circuits’ heat up at the thought of revenge.
The toaster would of shrugged it if had arms, instead he offered a sound that could only come close as someone quickly muttering ‘Idunno’.
“All I know is he kept saying to the other Doctor’s not to touch it, so it must be deadly right?” He lied again.
Truthfully, the toaster knew exactly what it was, the device was a prototype teleportation device Doctor 0 was making in order to see what’s beyond the crater, he wasn’t sure he wanted to do that but then again the Doctors were a little odd. He cackled quietly to himself, he wanted to see if the machine would blow up and kill Muggy allowing him to take another step forward in his insane lust to destroy the world in glorious atomic fire.
“Are you sure this thing will work?” Muggy sceptically asked him.
“Look Muggy, do you REALLY want to question me? I’m trying to help you out.”
“Yeah but-“
“I thought you wanted to get back at Doctor 0, I mean he DID program you to be this obsessive.”
“Yes I know but-“
“So what’s it going to be then Muggy? Revenge? Or are you just going to remain Doctor 0’s little bitch and never clean another mug again.”
“I AM NO ONES FUCKING BITCH!” Muggy screamed at him shaking in anger.
The toaster watched as Muggy smashed the glass with his arm and pulled the device free from its tank, he struggled for a moment to hold the contraption before gaining his balance and began to cackle like a deranged Super Mutant. Then, wheeling as fast as he could he charged out of the Sink and straight into the Think Tank completely forgetting the failsafe around the room, he drove as fast as he could up to where Doctor 0 was currently working and pointed the contraption at him.
“TASTE MY REVENGE!” Muggy roared as Doctor 0 turned round.
“Muggy what on earth are you-“the Doctor glared at him. “What are you doing with Project Gemini? Go put it back at once!” he then turned back to what he was doing.
Muggy simply stood there not sure what to think, he then felt a burning anger on top of his existing anger realising the Doctor didn’t even consider him a threat. He angrily shouted profanity after profanity at Doctor 0 that would make a Deathclaw blush; he then began firing the device at Doctor 0, however because of the failsafe, nothing happened. Doctor 0 hadn’t even bothered to turn around at the profanity and rapid button mashing. Slowly, Muggy turned around and began to leave the room dragging Project Gemini with him, as he re-entered the Sink he heard the sound of a crazy and ecstatic laugh coming from the Toaster and the other appliances in the Sink who up until now had remained silent.
“That was fucking priceless, even better than what I wanted to happen!” he said between laughing.
The Toaster was a little annoyed Muggy didn’t use the device and get blown up in the process, but he was happy with what happened none the less. Muggy was shaking in anger and charged at the table the Toaster was on dropping Gemini in the process; however he only reached half way up the table leg. He began to shake the table in anger which made the Toaster laugh even more.
“SHUT THE FUCK UP, YOU LIED TO ME YOU BASTARD!”
The Toaster just continued to laugh, he was thankful he didn’t need to breath as he would be struggling for breath. Muggy just cried out in anger and pushed away from the table and into another room to sulk; he settled in his corner and began to mumble to himself in anger. He sighed to himself and decided to get his revenge on the Toaster the next day, he began to detail out his plan in his ‘mind’, if the plan needed that much planning and input though. He simply decided he would use Gemini on the Toaster as a ‘test’, and then use it on Doctor 0.
“I bet he lied about the fucking closet as well…” he muttered as he powered down for the night.
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As the sun peeked itself over the edge of the horizon, the usual morning routine of the Big MT began. The night stalkers returned to their caves after a night of hunting, the Spore Carriers and Lobotomites emerged from their respected resting places and promptly began to scour the vast area of the Big MT for well, things to kill. A small group of Lobotomites were suddenly attacked by a large swarm of Cazadores which seemed to silently appear out of nowhere, they were quickly killed.
As the light filtered through the cracks and holes of the ruined buildings surrounding the complex, the Sink began to ‘awaken’ with Muggy being the first; he slowly and carefully rolled out of the room and looked around. The coast was clear, he wasn’t sure why he checked given he was the only one in the Sink that could move about, either way it didn’t faze him. He went slowly towards where Gemini was being kept in its now broken tank and gave a silent cackle, reaching for the device. As his little ‘hands’ almost grabbed it he heard a voice who belonged to someone that made his circuits boil in anger, Doctor 0.
“And just what do you think you’re doing Muggy, I said to leave Project Gemini alone.”
“I uh…wanted to see if it could help me clean mugs?” he said in reply trying to lie.
Doctor 0 looked at him motionless, Muggy shifted on the spot nervously hoping he had bought his lie.
He hadn’t
“I don’t believe you.”
“It’s the truth Doctor 0 I swear!” Muggy insisted.
“Then why did the Toaster tell me you were going to use it to.” Doctor 0 chuckled with a hint of malice. “Kill me.”
Muggy cursed internally at the Toaster, he should have known the Toaster would do something like that.
“Seeing as you are so interested in Project Gemini, you can help me test it.” Doctor 0 continued.
Muggy backed up slightly a little concerned.
“But…isn’t it a weapon?”
Doctor 0 burst out laughing.
“Why on earth would you think it’s a weapon? Anyone can see it’s a prototype teleportation device.”
Muggy again internally cursed the Toaster.
‘I am going to fucking kill him later…’
“Now, would you please enter the main room and take Project Gemini with.” Doctor 0 ordered.
Muggy grumbled as he slowly wheeled out of the Sink, he heard the Toasters mocking cruel laugh ringing inside of him. He made his way to the centre of the main room and waited, he wanted to disobey the Doctor and refuse to take part in his experiment but he didn’t want to be threatened again with being shut down like the last time he refused to do something. Shuddering at the thought he heard the Doctor return from the Sink, he watched him as he stood next to an awaiting table. Muggy noticed it was conveniently high enough for him to see on top of it, he assumed that Doctor 0 had always been planning on using him as the guinea pig and this made him angrier.
“Please set up Project Gemini on the table.” He ordered again.
Muggy slowly trudged over and placed the device on the hold that was on the table before waiting in the middle of the room in front of Gemini, by now the other Doctors had stopped what they were doing and had come over to investigate. Muggy didn’t really pay attention to them, his mind began to drift through the usual things he would think about, mugs, cleaning mugs, how much he hated Doctor 0 and now how much he hated the Toaster. He chuckled to himself imagining a giant mug crushing the Toaster before happily cleaning the mug; he was brought out of his thoughts by the sound of Doctor Borous.
“Oh? Is this that little device you’ve been working on O?”
“Yes and my name is not O its 0 why can’t any of you get that right?” Doctor 0 angrily replied.
“Stop being melodramatic O; just get on with your experiment.” Doctor Dala said.
“Yes do get on with it.” Doctor Mobius added.
Doctor 0 grumbled as his eye screens flickered to blank screens, coding then began to rapidly appear and Gemini started to hum as it powered up.
“@@[=$+<_--*]@@? @@[$((*#8#%]?” Doctor 8 asked Doctor Klein.
“No I don’t think he will, then again Doctor 0 does hate Mr House so he could be doing that with the device out of hatred.”
Muggy backed up slightly, he didn’t understand what Doctor 8 said but he didn’t much like the reply he got. He nervously looked back from Gemini and to Doctor 0, he jumped slightly when Gemini made a loud humming sound.
“Ah were good to go, are you ready Muggy?” Doctor 0 asked him.
“W-will this hurt me?” Muggy replied nervously.
“Oh no of course not, well you may feel a strange pain when the electromagnetic field hits you but nothing to worry about.”
“Wait what?”
“Switching on the main power in 3…2…1…Now!”
Doctor 0’s screens flicked back to his eyes as the device whirred and a bright blue ball of light began to form at Gemini’s end, Muggy braced himself and began to shake slightly in fear.
‘This is how I die’ he thought. ‘My only regrets are I didn’t clean enough mugs, and kill Doctor 0 and the Toaster’
Gemini made a loud electrical sound as a blue beam shot out and hit Muggy, the beam hummed as Muggy was surrounded by a blue field of energy and began to cry in panic. Oddly enough he couldn’t feel any pain which he had expected, and nothing was happening either. He stopped and looked at the Doctors who were looking to one another as Doctor 0 muttered to himself, Muggy assumed whatever Gemini was meant to be doing it wasn’t doing it right and he couldn’t help but snicker to himself. Just as he was about to ask Doctor 0 if he could go seeing how Gemini had clearly failed in its test he heard Doctor 0 say a few words that made him panic.
“Ah there we go, fixed it.”
Muggy felt himself zapped again but this time he could feel it course in his circuits, he cried out in pain as the electricity from the ray shocked him. His screen flicked from the picture of the mug to black and back again as he flailed his arms in fear, he turned around and tried to make a run for it but it was too late. Just as he reached the door he felt himself explode and the world went black, Doctor 0 powered down Gemini which slowly stopped humming and looked to where Muggy was standing. Where muggy once stood was a smouldering black stain on the ground that was smoking, he turned to the other Doctors and would have been smirking had he not been a robot.
“Well then Doctors, the test was a complete success!”
“No it wasn’t you just blew the robot up!” Doctor Klein replied.
“Oh contraire” Doctor 0 began. “If you would cast your attention to Project Gemini…”
The other Doctors all looked at Gemini’s small screen, the words ‘Subject successfully teleported’ was there for all to see. The Doctors murmured and then turned to Doctor 0 and congratulated him.
“I must say, that is a fine device you have created.” Doctor Dala said approvingly.
“Now all we need to do is have a Lobotomite test it.” Doctor Borous added.
“I still don’t think we should see what’s beyond the crater...” Doctor Mobius sighed as he drifted back to his work.
“}}[[$&*~_--*] 8#%]?” Doctor 8 asked.
“I’m…not sure where Muggy has been teleported to, he SHOULD be somewhere inside the crater but I’m not too sure…” Doctor 0 replied as he looked over the screen on Gemini.
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Muggy’s screen flicked back into life, he groaned as he slowly re-started. He could see the sky above him was clear and he heard the sounds of strange creatures around him, carefully he righted himself and looked around him. He saw a never ending sea of strange brown constructions with green things on top of them, confusedly he looked around and saw the ground was covered in a weird green looking substance, it reminded him of the area he overheard the Doctors talk about where the Spore Carriers lurked.
“Grass…I think it’s called…” he muttered to himself.
He then had a sudden realisation, he was either no longer in the Big MT or he was dead. To test this theory he suddenly rammed directly into one of the nearby trees and fell back onto his back.
“Ok…so I’m not dead…then where the hell am I?” he said aloud.
Only the sounds of the forest replied to him, shaking with anger again he began to head off down a path.
“Well this is just fucking perfect! Fucking Doctor 0! fucking Toaster!” he rammed swung his tiny arm into a tree before holding it with his other arm. ”AH FUCK!”
He then stopped and whimpered as a particularly scary thought came into his mind.
“What…what if there are no m-m-mugs here…”
He paused for a moment then began to sob hysterically and took off quickly. He suddenly felt himself bump into something and he fell onto his back again, cursing whatever it was he got up and was greeted by a strange sleeping creature. Muggy had never seen such a creature; the only thing he recognised was the scorpion like tail but only from Doctor Mobius’s Robo Scorpions. It made him feel happier because it looked like a mutation he once saw in the Doctors lab.
‘I must still be in the Big MT somewhere.’ He thought.
The creature awoke baring his fangs turning around, angry for being woken up from his sleep. It flapped its wings and lashed its tail looking for whatever woke it as Muggy looked up, thinking he was still in the Big MT he was happy to see it, he had one question he was desperate to ask.
“You got any mugs?”
Muggy didn’t know that he had bumped into what was called a manticore, it paused for a moment and looked down at Muggy; it tilted its head in confusion. It had never seen anything quite like Muggy before, it was more confused as the little creature didn’t show any fear to it. The manticore cautiously sniffed Muggy, who backed up confused himself.
“Back off!” Muggy said and smacked the manticore on the nose with his arm.
The manticore yelped out in surprise and then growled; Muggy backed up a little more thinking it may have been a mistake to of hit the creature
.
“LOOK! FOOD!” Muggy shouted pointing in a random direction.
Luckily for Muggy he had found something that was even more gullible then he was. When the Manticore turned around, Muggy to the chance and sped off away screaming like a little girl flailing his arms in the air. The Manticore, realising it had been had, let out a ferocious roar and gave chase. Muggy hadn’t take into consideration that the Manticore was much larger then he was and therefore was gaining on him quickly, Muggy wailed suddenly taking a quick left turn which the manticore didn’t expect and gained some distance before the manticore began to give chase again.
Muggy began to pant as if he was out of breath, he wasn't sure why he was given he didn't have any lungs but frankly in his current situation he really didn’t care. He looked around as he darted under an upturned root and saw an opening, he took another chance and sped off towards it frantically. He quickly turned around to see the Manticore gaining up to him and he let out a girlish scream, out of instinct he took a left turn and rolled under a bunch of branches and undergrowth, too big for the Manticore who couldn’t chase him any further and it let out a roar of frustration. The Manticore soon gave up and with a disgruntled growl it retreated back into the forest, Muggy softly ‘panted’ in his hiding place with only the silence of the now quiet forest for company. Cautiously, Muggy slowly came out of cover and looked around, satisfied that he was alone he sighed and began to head to what he thought was the exit.
“I need some mugs to clean to calm down…” he said to himself.
As he came to the exit he gasped and rubbed his screen with his arms to make sure there was no dirt obscuring his vision, he saw what he couldn’t believe to be true. A small town of bright coloured thatched buildings just ahead of him, he began to suddenly sob violent and run in circles flailing his arms.
“I’m dead! I knew it I’m fucking dead!”
Muggy suddenly stopped as an idea came to his head, he turned to look at the surroundings and if he could smile, he would be.
“If I’m dead...this must be silicon heaven, which means…”
He let out a delighted squeal.
“And there are houses…so that must mean…” he inhaled as he reared up slightly before shouting loudly. “MUGS! SWEET FILTHY MUGS!”
He started to laugh softly before bursting out into a deranged psychotic laugh and shot off towards the town screaming mugs over and over again.
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All was normal in Ponyville, the sun was slowly rising and the day had just begun and the ponies where starting their daily activities. The market stall owners were setting up their stalls with their fresh new merchandise, a cross eyed Pegasus flew past carrying a large over stuffed bag of letters, the morning birds were singing a song or two. Two ponies were walking towards a bridge happy enjoying one another’s company
“It’s such a beautiful morning wouldn’t you agree Bon Bon?”
“Oh yes Lyra, I’m glad you talked me into taking this morning walk, it is nice to see Princess Celestia’s sun this early. You really can see its proper beauty.”
Lyra giggled as they came to a stop on the bridge and looked over the edge, Lyra pointed with her hoof towards with the horizon where the river flowed off into the distance. Bon Bon joined her and looked to where she was looking and gasped.
“This is what I wanted to show you Bon Bon…” Lyra smiled with a soft blush.
Bon Bon had no words; the sight was just breath taking. Her eyes sparkled as the water shimmered and reflected the light perfectly.
“When the light shimmers on the water ….the colours remind me of your coat…” Lyra continued rubbing her leg as her blush darkening.
Bon Bon turned to Lyra blushing herself before smiling, she turned Lyra’s head to face hers and giggled as Lyra let out a soft squeak.
“Lyra…”
“Bon Bon…”
The two mares slowly began to move their heads closer to one another slowly closing their eyes, time seemed to stop as their hearts began to beat faster and faster. With their faces inches away from one another’s they pursed their lips ready to kiss.
“Lyra…” Bon Bon whispered.
“Bon Bon…” Lyra whispered.
“HEY!” a voice suddenly shouted at them”…You got any mugs?”
The two suddenly lept backwards falling on their rumps blinking in surprise, the looked around with an angry glare for who ruined their special moment. Their faces went from anger to confusion as they couldn’t see the one responsible.
“HEY! I asked you a question.” The voice came again.
The two blinked and looked down to see a tiny metal contraption looking to and from each of them. It had its legs, or whatever they were on its ‘waist’ as it seemed to be waiting impatiently.
“Well?”
Lyra was at a loss for words, she simply stared at the strange thing in front of her. Bon Bon however was furious, it had ruined her morning walk with her marefriend. It had RUDELY interrupted the most important moment of the walk and not to mention it had the gall not to apologise.
“Well? WELL!” She started standing up. “How dare YOU for being a rude, insensitive little…little...so and so!” she snorted glaring daggers down at Muggy.
“Yeah!” Lyra joined in finding her voice and standing by her marefriends side. “You should be apologising to us!”
“For what?! All I asked was a fucking question!” Muggy shouted back in anger.
The two mares gasped shocked at the language it used, Lyra took a step back before Bon Bon stepped forward snorting in anger.
“How DARE you use such language in front of two mares!”
Muggy crossed his arms and glared back at the two, everything around them was quiet as they three stared down one another neither party making a move. It was then that Muggy broke the silence.
“Well?”
“Well WHAT?” Lyra and Bon Bon said through gritted teeth
“Got any mugs?”
The two mares blinked, their faces etched blank and devoid of any emotion. This changed suddenly when both mares’ faces became red as Big Mac’s fur and both turned around; they gave Muggy a hard buck to his screen and sent him shooting off into the distance screaming all the way.
The whole of Ponyville, least the ones who were up and about at this hour, all stopped when they heard the girly screaming coming from the small metal object fly over them. Normally when something unexplainable would happen to the town, the residents would react in fear and run about in terror. But for some reason they didn’t, weather it was the girly scream or the size of the metal object they didn’t know, they just watched it fly by and carried on with their day if not a little confused.
Muggy slammed into a tree hard and slid down it slowly before falling onto his back with aloud groan, he remained like that for a few moments as his screen flickered on and off like he was going in and out of consciousness . He groaned again as his vision faded.
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“Hello? Are you alright?”
Muggy heard a faint and blurred voice call out, his screen flickering back to life as he rose up rubbing the top of his monitor.
“Uhm…Hello?” the voice said again.
Muggy looked around seeing he had crashed into a tree…that looked like it was a house? He shook himself and wheeled round to see a concerned small looking purple thing looking at him.
“Are you ok? Can you talk?” it said again tapping Muggy’s screen.
“Hey stop that!” Muggy shouted at him.
The creature jumped in surprise when it spoke. Muggy snickered as it got up and glared at him.
“You…can speak Equestrian?” it asked.
“If you mean English then yeah I can.” Muggy replied.
“Oh dude you look so cool!” the creature exclaimed as he walked around Muggy. “Man your tiny…” it said again chuckling resting an arm on Muggy’s head.
“Get off me!” Muggy shoved him away.
The creature only laughed at the small metal thing that began to grumble.
“Oh hey you gotta meet Twilight; she’s going to love you!”
Muggy was about to protest when the creature pushed him into the house, as they entered Muggy looked up at the bookcases crammed with books in awe. He had been in Higgs village before where the Doctors lived when they were once human, he had seen lots of old destroyed pre-war books lying around but never had he seen this many in such a fine condition.
“Hey Twilight, come here there’s somepony you gotta meet!”
“Oh, and who is that Spike” a voice came from another room.
“It’s uh…” he paused for a moment. “Dude what’s your name?”
“Muggy.”
“That’s a strange name…”
“Oh and Spike isn’t?” Muggy retorted.
Spike shot him a glare and was about to say something but was interrupted by Twilight calling him again.
“Well Spike, who is it?”
“It’s Muggy Twilight.”
Twilight came into the room looking around with a smile on her face expecting to see another pony in the room, however not see one she looked to Spike with confusion on her face.
“So…where’s this Muggy then Spike?”
“Huh? Oh sorry it’s behind me.” Spike replied
“Spike, it’s rude to call-“her eyes widened when Spike sidestepped revealing Muggy. “Somepony…it…” Twilight’s jaw dropped open as she stared at him.
“Uh…what’s wrong with horny here?” Muggy asked the small one.
“Uhmm Twilight….you ok?” Spike asked Twilight waving a hand in front of her face.
Twilight’s mouth formed into a large grin as she walked past Spike and over to Muggy walking around in a circle looking over him, Muggy shifted slightly feeling uncomfortable with the attention he was receiving.
“Oh by the Princess! Where on earth did you find it?” She asked Spike.
“Well…it caused that noise a moment ago, remember? The sound of something hitting the library?”
“Oh yeah, and it was Muggy?”
“Mhm.”
“Oh Spike this is amazing! Think about what we could learn from it!”
“What do you mean Twilight?”
“Well it’s clearly not from our world so it must be from another species!”
“Right, well what you wanna do about it?”
“Well I’d like to ask it some questions first, then I think we should inform the Princess and….where’d it go.”
They both looked to where Muggy was but he was no longer there, instead they heard books being thrown to the floor. Turning their attention to the bookshelves they saw Muggy pulling out books, looking at them, and then promptly throwing them aside.
“Hey stop that!” Spike shouted.
“Hey…can I ask you a question?” Muggy suddenly said his back still to them ignoring Spike.
“Sure, what is it?” Twilight replied. ‘I guess its male, judging by the tone.’ She thought to herself.
“Do you have any mugs?” Muggy said turning round.
“Uhm…why do you want mugs exactly?” She asked. “That’s a bit of an odd question.”
“Oh you think I don’t KNOW it’s a strange fucking question?! You think I LIKE the obsessive feeling of needing to clean mugs all the god damn time?!” he barked back at her in a slightly psychotic tone.
“Hey there’s no need to swear at her you metal freak!” Spike growled angrily at him.
“Oh yeah Small fry?” Muggy wheeled over prodding Spike in the chest.
“Look whose talking shorty!” Spike growled his forehead pressed into Muggy’s screen.
“Both of you enough!” Twilight shouted separating them with her hooves. “Look, I assume you have some questions of your own Mister…?”
“Muggy.”
“Muggy…ok, and I have my own so how about this. I ask a question then you can ask one ok?”
Muggy thought for a moment tapping his screen.
“Sure why the hell not?”
Twilight beamed as she levitated a blank scroll and quill over before taking a seat on the sofa with Spike, Muggy remained where he was unable to sit down.
“Ok Muggy, my first question is…what are you exactly?”
“Wait…you…really want to know about…me?” Muggy sniffled which confused Spike and Twilight, given he didn’t have a nose or anything organic about him. “Nobody ever asks about Muggy! You’ve made me so happy!” he sobbed.
“Uhm…that doesn’t really answer my question…” Twilight replied.
“Maybe you’ve heard of those big imposing Securitrons with their lovely laser guns and rocket launchers and scary faces?”
Twilight and Spike’s eyes widened at this, they were slightly alarmed of the weaponry Muggy was talking about and the thought he may be dangerous.
“I’m not one of those…”
Twilight and Spike mentally face hoofed as Muggy continued rambling on.
“Doctor 0 was always jealous of House industries, and he thought it would be FUCKING HILARIOUS to build a tiny neurotic Securitron. Big fucking laugh!”
Twilight flinched at his swearing again as did Spike, she felt a little sorry for the Muggy though. It sounded like he was upset with who he was and wanted more to do with life.
“So um…you got any coffee cups for me now?” he finished looking up at her expectantly.
“Is that your question?” Twilight asked puzzled.
“Yeah.”
“Ok…sure you don’t want to know about where you are or who we are?”
“Nope.”
“Right…well then moving on-“Twilight was interrupted by Muggy.
“You didn’t answer my question.”
“Uhm…well yes we have some but I can get them for you in a minute.”
“But I want them now!” Muggy crossed his arms in a huff.
“Can’t you wait till were done with the questions?”
“Fine but you better not be lying to me like the fucking toaster!”
Twilight frowned in confusion but shrugged the comment off; she carried on asking him questions about where he was from and about him in general. She got a little confused by each of his questions being related to mugs and only mugs, never asking a question about where he was or anything related to Equestria like she had anticipated. It left her a little down heartened not being able to properly introduce Equestria to a new creature, she soon had all she had wanted for the time being and smiled to Muggy.
“Ok Muggy, I will ask some more questions later if that’s ok with you.”
“Sure whatever, just gimme my mugs already.” Muggy replied impatiently.
“I will do in a moment…I wanted to ask you one last favour and I promise you will never be without a dirty mug.” Twilight said giving a pleading smile to him
Muggy let out an irritated sigh and ran his hand down his screen slowly.
“Fine, but only one more thing.”
“Oh thank you thank you! See I’d like to perform a scientific test if you could-“ Twilight was cut off as Muggy quickly slammed into the wall looking at her.
“T-test? S-s-scientific?!” He said in a panicked tone.
“Uh…yes? Is everything ok Muggy?”
Muggy didn’t hear her; he was having a major flashback. In it he was strapped to a table with various nasty looking pieces equipment around him, operating the machines was Doctor 0 who was laughing manically as the machines cut him up into individual parts. The next flashback Muggy was on a treadmill that was set to very fast, at the end behind him was a pit of fire and ahead of him was a mug being dangled on a bit of string. Again Doctor 0 was operating everything still laughing manically, it was of course and over exaggeration of what had really happened but to Muggy it was too much. Taking off from the library he burst out of the door screaming down the path.
“Muggy come back!” Twilight called after him.
“Keep your crummy mugs, you not testing on me!” he yelled back before disappearing leaving a lot of confused looking ponies.
“He’s…a strange one.” Twilight said to Spike.
“Strange? He has a fair few screws lose if you ask me.” He replied.
“Come on we better go find him before he freaks somepony out, or hurts himself.” Twilight said before taking off after Muggy with Spike.
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Muggy took a sharp left and hid behind a building panting as he did, he waited a moment before looking back then quickly hid again as Twilight ran past with Spike.
‘The crazy bitch is going to cut me up like that bastard Doctor 0….gotta hide!’ He thought to himself.
He looked around and saw the building he was hiding behind had its front door ajar, deciding not to look a gift horse in the mouth; he quickly went inside and let out a sigh of relief. He looked around at his new surroundings, he saw a lot of fabrics and strange white things that looked like the one called Twilight standing perfectly still on metal poles almost as if they weren’t real creatures.
Moving more into the shop he came to a stop when he heard raised voices coming from a nearby room, curious he wheeled over and slowly leaned in. He saw a white horned creature talking to a smaller white horned creature.
“Really Sweetie Belle, such nonsense!” The larger one said.
“But Rarity, I DID see a metal thing fly over Ponyville. Me and half the town saw it!” Sweetie Belle replied.
“You must stop with these silly stories my dear, now please I need to finish these orders.” Rarity said.
“Fine I’ll go, but I’m not lying!” Sweetie Belle said before turning to leave, she froze when she saw Muggy in the doorway and her face lit up. “See sis I told you!”
“What on earth do you mean sweetie-“Rarity stopped mid-sentence seeing Muggy and let out a soft scream before fainting.
“…What.” Muggy flatly said.
“You can talk? That’s awesome!” Sweetie Belle giggled bouncing around Muggy.
“Please don’t do that…”Muggy asked her.
“Sorry…anyway…what the heck are you?” She asked him.
Muggy was about to reply when Rarity groaned loudly on the floor where she had fainted.
“Can you help me sit my sister up first? She’s a bit overdramatic.”
“Fine, but I want a mug after this.” Muggy replied.
Sweetie Belle and Muggy carefully picked Rarity up and laid her down on her red sofa before conversing, Muggy let out a frustrated sigh but went along with it. From what he gathered he found out from her inane babbling her sister, the one who fainted, was a fashion designer. This made him feel more comfortable as he didn’t have to fear being tested on, unlike like that crazy purple one.
“Oh…my stars…what happened?” Rarity said as she came to.
“Well you fainted at the sight of Mr Muggy sis.” Sweetie Belle replied.
“Mr….Muggy?” She asked looking up to see the little robot give a wave. “Oh it’s…that metal thing…I feel faint.”
“Sis, don’t be overdramatic! He’s a nice guy.” Sweetie Bell scowled at her sister.
Rarity looked between Sweetie Belle and Muggy trying to find a reply, but only managed to make incoherent mutterings and odd sounds of protest.
“Sis.” Sweetie Belle said again more sternly.
“Oh alright, I apologise Mr Muggy for my rude behaviour. It’s just I’ve never seen anything quite like you before…it was a little unnerving I have to admit.” Rarity said with an embarrassed frown.
“Whatever.” Muggy replied. “You got any mugs I can have?”
“Why on earth do you want mugs my dear?” Rarity asked him.
“Well I want to clean them, isn’t that obvious?”
“I see…odd request but I suppose it can’t do any harm, I guess you can clean the cups and mugs we have in the kitchen.”
“D-do….you mean it? You’re not going to lie to me and try to perform any tests on me like that purple psycho.” Muggy asked holding his hands together.
“Purple…psycho?” Rarity paused for a moment trying to work out what he was on about.
“You mean Twilight?” Sweetie Belle asked him.
“Whatever her name was, she tried to test on poor Muggy.” He choked back a sob. “Don’t tell her I’m here.”
Rarity sighed and rubbed her head trying to wrap it around what was going on exactly, Sweetie Belle on the other hand had to stifle a giggle from Muggy’s behaviour. They both knew Twilight wouldn’t ever hurt anyone and Muggy must have gotten the wrong end of the stick, still they both couldn’t help but feel sorry for the little metal thing. Given his uniqueness they gathered Twilight would be all over him trying to find out as much as she could from him.
“You have my word darling I won’t tell Twilight where you are.” Rarity said placing a hoof over her heart.
“Oh thank you thank you thank you thank you!” Muggy cried hugging her leg.
Rarity couldn’t help but let out a soft giggle, her first fears of the robot where now gone. He reminded her of a small filly with his behaviour and couldn’t help but find him entertaining.
“Your quite welcome darling.” She smiled to Muggy before noticing the time on the clock and turning to Sweetie Belle. “Goodness you’re going to be late Sweetie Belle!”
“But Rarity, I want to stay and play with Muggy.” Sweetie Belle whined.
“No buts, I’m sure you’ll have plenty of time to play with him after school, now come along off you pop.”
“Fine.” Sweetie Belle said giving up. “See you later sis, bye Muggy!” she waved to the pair of them before joining a group of fillies also on their way to school.
Rarity waved after her before closing the door and turning her attention to Muggy with a smile, she wondered over to her table.
“Now, Mr Muggy I have to as you something. Seeing as you’re from another world it seems.”
‘Here we go…’ Muggy thought to himself.
“What kinda of fashion does your world have, I simply must know!” she asked him her eyes sparkling.
“Well…uhm.” Muggy began trying to think exactly how to describe fashion.
Rarity could see he was struggling to think of an answer and an idea came into her head, she quickly darted off and grabbed a few mannequins that had dress on them and levitated them over to where Muggy was. She placed them on the ground with a proud smile.
“Are they anything like this?” She said.
Muggy looked over the finely made clothing, looking over how the materials fitted together to make a smooth and comfortable appearance as well as the shine that some of the gems attached had. He wheeled around them stroking his screen as he inspected them before coming to a conclusion, they were nothing like the clothing he had seen the lobotomites wear and to him that was the definition of normal clothing. So the clothes before him were well, les then good in his mind.
“They're….not like that, no in fact, it’s nothing like it at all.” He replied.
“Oh…then how do they look?” Rarity asked him.
“Well frankly, nothing like these ‘things’.” He said with disgust and making quotation marks with his hands.
Rarity flattened her ears and frowned, obviously a little hurt at what Muggy said. Muggy saw her face and shrugged at her.
“You wanted the truth, not my fault your stuff is bad.”
Rarity gasped and tears formed in her eyes, she took a step back before scowling suddenly at Muggy.
“Well then, show me how fashion is in YOUR world!” she shouted at him.
Muggy sighed and wheeled over to one of the dresses and began to rip it apart and mess it up, basing it off what a lobotomite once wore. Rarity’s eyes widened watching him her bottom lip quivering unable to comprehend what was going on.
“There, that’s what it’s supposed to look like.” Muggy said with a proud tone to his voice.
He wheeled back to admire his handy work proudly before turning to see Rarity’s happy face, only he saw her on the floor. Unconscious and a fair bit of foam coming from the corner of her open mouth, shrugging it off as a good reaction to his work Muggy began looking for the mugs. He found the door leading to the kitchen and giggled to himself and tried to push it open, the door refused to budge. Muggy tried once more grumbling to himself but to no avail.
“Oh fucking come on!” He shouted.
He tried reaching for the door handle but he was to short, shouting angrily he hit the door and turned to leave. He found the front door closed as well and swore once more before he noticed a strange little square shape in the doors base; curiously he pushed it open and found it led outside. He grunted as he narrowly managed to squeeze himself out of the small frame and into the streets again.
‘Guess I need to find somewhere else to get some mugs…’ He thought to himself.
He trundled along the roads for a long while being given odd looks from the ponies who passed him by, he had to now and again duck into an alley way or hide behind something to avoid Twilight and Spike who were still trying to find him. Eventually he found himself on the outskirts of the town wondering around trying to find a pony that didn’t scare him and wouldn’t lie to him; he came to an abrupt stop hearing the faint sound of something snoring. He looked around before looking up and noticed a cloud hovering not too far above the level of the rooftops, on said cloud was a light blue pony that was fast asleep.
‘Well that one doesn’t look crazy…maybe it can give me mugs.’ Muggy thought.
Muggy waved his arms above his head trying to get the attention of the sleeping pony.
“Hey, hey you!” He cred but received no response.
Grumbling Muggy looked around for something to throw up at the pony, finding several small stones he picked them up and began to throw them up. Several of them missed their target but the last one must have hit it as the pony let out a yelp of pain and surprise before looking around angrily.
“Who threw that!” it shouted.
“I did, I wanna ask you something!” Muggy shouted back.
Quick as a flash the blue pony locked onto where Muggy was and shot down to his level looking at him angrily, not surprised by the fact he was a small metal thing.
“What in the hay was that for you little punk!”
“I wanted to ask you something.”
“Well you could have just said instead of pelting me with stones!”
“You were asleep you moron, you wouldn’t wake up!”
“Don’t call me a moron; nopony calls Rainbow Dash a moron!” She prodded him in his screen.
“Wait…you’re called…Rainbow Dash.” Muggy said.
“Yeah.” She started, thinking he might have heard of her.” Fastest flier in all Equestria, maybe you’ve heard of my awesomeness?”
“Rainbow…Dash.” Muggy said stifling a snicker.
“That’s right, the best pony to-“she was interrupted by Muggy bursting into fits of laughter.
“Rainbow Dash?! That’s the stupidest name I’ve ever heard, who the fuck wants to be called ‘Rainbow Dash’.” Adding a camp tone to when he said her name, Muggy fell onto his back laughing crazily.
“Hey watch it small fry, my name is 20% cooler then ANYPONY'S name and I-“she tried to retort him but the sound of his laughing was cutting her out.
“I thought my name was stupid or that purple thing's name was stupid but fucking hell does yours take this biscuit!” He said in between laughing.
Rainbow Dash glared at him gritting her teeth before flaring out her wings.
“I don’t have to put up with you, I’m out of here you little freak.”
And with that she took off quickly soon leaving the laughing robot alone.
“Wait.” He started as his laughing came to a stop.” I still haven’t asked you my question.”
Seeing as she was no longer there, Muggy propped himself up and let out a contented sigh.
‘Even though I’m still mug less…that was totally worth it!’ He thought to himself.
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Muggy wondered down the pathway leading outside of the town, he had gone to several buildings and each time he had received the same answer, a kick to the face or the pony in question slamming the door in his face or screaming and running away. He felt a little down trodden now and decided to go see if there was another town or something he could go and ask, he came to a stop when he noticed a small cottage down the path he was travelling.
'Maybe there’s still some hope left!' He said to himself as he quickly sped over to the little house.
Upon reaching the door he had a flashback as to how he acted to the other ponies and decided to try a different
approach, all in the name of cleaning mugs. He knocked on the door three times and waited quietly, he thought he heard a faint reply coming from the other side of the door before it opened slightly and a yellow pony poked her head out shyly. Upon seeing the small robot it let out a quiet eep and hid behind the door.
“C-can I h-help you?” It asked Muggy.
“Hello, I was wondering if I may ask you a favour.” He replied pleasantly.
The door opened a bit more and the pony once more poked its head into vision.
“A f-favour?”
“Yes you see, I like to clean mugs. A LOT.” Muggy struggled not to fall into a crazed tone as he said mugs. “But no one so far as allowed me to clean any, so I was wondering if you’d be so kind as to let me clean your mugs.”
The door fully opened and Muggy saw the yellow pony smiling down at him sweetly, it was a bit odd to him but he felt a bit more comfortable around this one.
“Why, that’s no trouble at all. You can come in and have some tea if you’d like then clean up afterwards if that’s ok with you…”
“That would be lovely.” Muggy replied happily.
As he wheeled in he couldn’t help but giggle quietly to himself, unlike the other creatures this one seemed to be telling him the gods honest truth and that he would be able to clean filthy mugs soon enough.
“Make yourself at home…” she paused forgetting she hadn’t asked his name.
“Muggy.” He said to her.
“Muggy, well my name is Fluttershy. I’ll just go and put the kettle on for us.” She smiled to him and went into what he assumed was the kitchen
.
Muggy wheeled around the room he was in and hummed to himself softly; it was a nice looking home and reminded him of the higgs village homes minus all the dirt and debris. He heard a soft tapping from behind him and turned round to see a small angry fluffy looking creature glaring at him, he looked down at it as it pointed to him, then to the kitchen where the yellow pony had gone into and tapped his foot again.
“What?” Muggy asked it.
The small creature slapped its forehead and pointed to Muggy then the door expectantly, Muggy looked to the door then back at the small creature understanding what he meant.
“No I’m not going; I’ve got mugs to clean.”
Out of nowhere the small creature produced a carrot and threw it at Muggy hitting him square in the screen. Muggy wheeled back in surprise before looking down at the creature again.
“Hey what was that for you little fluff ball?”
Muggy was hit again by another object this time and fell onto his back, soon after the creature lept onto Muggy and began to rapidly smack his screen. Muggy flailed at the sudden attack before shoving off the creature and quickly getting up.
“Come on then you fucking bitch!” he growled at it.
The creature lifted its arms into the air followed by one leg and waited for Muggy to make a move; Muggy watched it before charging at it swinging his arms. The creature jumped out of the way and landed to the side as Muggy went straight into the wall making some things fall to the floor, cursing to himself he wheeled round and charged at the creature again.
“Keep still!”
The creature once more dodged out of the way and as Muggy went past him he delivered a double kick to his back sending him onto his front with a thud, the creature landed back down with a smug look on its face as Muggy got back up on his wheel and turned around angrily at him.
“You little fucker!”
The creature lifted a hand up and made a ‘bring it on’ motion with its fingers, Muggy growled and looked around quickly. He spotted a book that was on the floor he had knocked down when he had collided with the wall and had an idea.
“Oh why thank you that tea looks wonderful.” He said looking to the creature’s right at the kitchen door.
The creature, as Muggy had hoped, looked in shock to where the kitchen was thinking his owner had come back in. Seizing the moment Muggy grabbed the book and smacked the back of the creatures head hard with it, the creature screeched and fell forward on its face unconscious. Cackling to himself insanely he looked down at the creature in triumph just as the door opened.
“Ok the tea is just brewing and I-“Fluttershy stopped seeing the body of the white creature and gasped.” Oh no Angel what happened?!” she rushed over to its body and looked at Muggy.
“You see he uh…he jumped off the table to show me that he could do a front flip but he landed on his face, I was about to call you before you came in just now.” He lied.
“Oh no Angel you poor thing!” She scooped up the creature buying the lie and placed him in a basket before turning to Muggy and ushering him out of the door. “I’m so sorry but Angel needs me right now, can you come back a little bit later on when he’s feeling better?”
Muggy tried to protest but nothing came out except incoherent noises which Fluttershy mistook for sounds of understanding.
“Oh I’d knew you’d understand, thank you Muggy.” She said as she opened and then closed the door.
Muggy was speechless, he stared at the door for a few moments before turning around and heading of down the pathway dumbfounded.
‘That white bastard is worse than the fucking toaster…’ He thought to himself.
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“And then he said my dresses where bad and he…he…ripped them apart.” Rarity said holding back a sob.
Applejack patted her friend on her back reassuringly as the fashionista sobbed, she had been told by Rainbow Dash, Twilight and now Rarity who she had visited to ask a favour about the strange metal creature called Muggy who had caused a little bit of chaos and annoyance to her friends. Rarity sniffled as she blew her nose on a handkerchief she levitated nearby.
“Well sugarcube, its gone now so don’t dwell on it. Yer dresses are amazing and don’ you forget it!” Applejack said to her.
“Thank you Applejack…I guess you’re right.” Rarity said with a smile.
“Your darn tooting I’m right!” Applejack chuckled. “Element of honesty after all.”
Rarity chuckled and gave her friend a hug before saying farewell and showing Applejack out and going about her business. Applejack smiled to herself as she headed back towards her farm when she spotted in the distance coming towards her a little metal creature, her expression immediately changed to a scowl as she stormed over to the metal thing.
“Hey ah wan’ a word with you!” she shouted at it.
“Who me?” Muggy replied.
“Yeah you, what in the hay do ya’ll think you’re doing upsetting my friends?”
“I’ve done nothing wrong!” Muggy protested. “If anything everyone’s been lying to me and threatening me.”
“Don’t lie to me you lil varmint, ah heard how you made fun of Rainbow Dash and ruined Rarity’s dress.” Applejack snorted at him.
“Hey it’s not my fault she has a fucking stupid name! And this Rarity as you call her asked me to show her what fashion was like where I came from, not my problem if she got fucking offended!” Muggy replied.
“Why you little…” Applejack pressed her face into his screen and glared.
Applejack and Muggy stood there for a few moments glaring at one another before a voice brought them out of their stances.
“Oh hey Applejack, you found Muggy!” Twilight called happily.
“AH! NOT YOU AGAIN!” Muggy cried out in terror.
“Oh howdy Twilight, I was about to teach this varmint some manners.”
“Oh, but why?” Twilight asked her.
Before Applejack could answer, Spike, who was on Twilights back looked around and spoke up.
“Uh…where’d he go?”
They all looked around to see Muggy had vanished without a trace, leaving a down heartened Twilight, an annoyed Applejack and a somewhat bored Spike alone.
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Muggy panted as he darted round the corner.
‘That was to fucking close, that purple psycho bitch nearly got me’ He thought as he came to a stop outside a building. ‘I’ll hide in here.’
He entered the building and looked around; the room looked very strange to him. It was unlike any building he had ever seen before; there were a few tables and chairs and a display counter of sorts that contained a lot of things that Muggy had learned was ‘food’. He suddenly felt the strange feeling that he was being watched and turned around before letting out a startled screech as a pink pony grinned madly at him from where he had just come in.
“Oh my gosh oh my gosh! A tiny securitron, oh you’re so cute!” it cried pulling Muggy into a tight hug and twirling around with him.
Muggy was completely confused by this turn of events and even more so confused as to how this one knew what he was.
“Hey easy! Put me down!” he cried.
“Sorry.” The pink creature giggled placing him down. “Didn’t mean to get carried away, I’m Pinkie Pie by the way what’s your name?”
“Uh…Muggy.”
“Oh my gosh that’s so cute! Is it because you have a mug on your screen or…” she paused for a moment before letting out a loud gasp. “Ooooh you’re that securitron obsessed with coffee mugs aren’t you!”
“Uh…yes?” Muggy replied confused and a little scared at how much this pony knew about him.
“That’s so cool! I’m sorry that the toaster is such a meanie pants you don’t deserve that!”
“Wait how do you know about that bastard toaster?” Muggy asked her.
“Oh silly, everypony knows toasters are evil!” she giggled seemingly not shocked by his swearing.
“Riiight…anyway I’m just hiding here for the mean time from the one called Twilight and Applejack and I-“
“Oh don’t worry your safe here, say do you want this?” Pinkie giggled producing a dirty coffee mug seemingly from nowhere.
“How…how did you know?” Muggy asked staring at the coffee mug before taking it from her.
“Well duh silly, it’s in your name!” Pinkie giggled once more.
Muggy was at a loss for words, for the first time since he came here, he had finally been given a dirty mug to clean.
“Thank…thank you.”
“No problem, but that isn’t the best part! Follow me!” she bounced into the back room of the building.
Muggy followed her still holding the mug close to his chest, as he entered the room he let out a loud gasp at the sight before him. There in front of him was a large pile of unclean mugs, he tried to form a sentence but couldn’t find the words. Had he been human, he would be crying. Pinkie giggled as she bounced on the spot in the middle of the room.
“But…but…” he started.
“Well I had a feeling something big was going to happen today and decided to make a hundred cups of coffee for a celebration then decided it was a bad idea and swapped it for soda but I then realised something was here in Ponyville and tried to find you all day forgetting to clean the mugs in the process and now your hear and this is what you wanted so it’s the best way to welcome you to Ponyville!” Pinkie said in one breath before panting.
Muggy sobbed before quickly wheeling over to Pinkie and hugging her tightly.
“T-thank you!” he said choking back sobs.
Pinkie giggled hugging him tightly back, she let go of him and let Muggy move towards the mountains of dirty mugs, he began to cackle madly finally having his programmed desire fulfilled and then sped towards the pile of mugs. However there was a loud bang and Muggy had a blue field of energy engulfed him before a second bang filled the room; Pinkie closed her eyes to shield herself from the light. After a few moments she opened her eyes and saw a smouldering patch where Muggy once was as well as the remains of the mug he was holding, her mane deflated as he pouted at the disappearance of her new friend.
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Muggy’s screen flicked back to life as he looked around to see what the heck just happened, he saw he was back in the main room he was in before being sent to the strange world.
“There you have it; my teleportation device is a success. Being able to send a target away as well as return them!” Doctor 0 said proudly.
Muggy wheeled round to see Doctor 0 and the others around project Gemini, they were all congratulation Doctor 0 on his success and how the device could revolutionise everything. Muggy simply stood there in a state of disbelief and utter sadness; he slapped himself in the screen to see if it was all a dream. It wasn’t.
And so another day in the Big MT came to an end, the lobotomites retreated to their hiding places to sleep for the night. The night stalkers emerged from their dens to hunt for food, and the various other creatures that filled the crater went about their business. As for the main complex, all that could be heard where two things.
The laughing of a deranged and psychotic toaster, and the swearing and crying of a saddened and angered miniature securitron who had been robbed of the greatest thing he could of ever imagined.
The end.