> Brony Vs. Pony > by TheNewYorkBrony > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- > Oh God. > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- I sat tiredly under my black Rainbow Dash blanket, scowling. I had had an awful day at school. School. Man, I hated that place. It was nothing but a place for people to ridicule you, to judge you. Especially if you were a sixteen year old brony. Hi, my names Ronnie. I’m sixteen years old and i live in the Long Island suburbs. My house- apartment actually, isn't anything special, just your average place. I live with my mom. We moved out of our old house about two years ago. I still miss it, a lot actually, but ever since my sister took over, well... I miss it a little less. I’m not really antisocial, really, i have friends, but...sometimes they don't get my obsessions. They don’t get why I watch Friendship is Magic. Hell, I didn’t even understand at first. It was hard to explain to my mom and even harder to explain to my family. They accepted it surprisingly, and watch it with me sometimes. It’s pretty cool. Anyway, I had a rough day at school. You know, popular girls, thinking they're always better than you, yada, yada. Long story short, i ended up with a bloody nose. Dammit. Why do things like this always happen to me? There was a knock at the door. I paused the episode I was watching and went to open it. Looking through the peephole I saw nothing. Shrugging, thinking it was the kids who live down the hall, i went back to the TV. The knocking came again and this time i flung the door open. Still, there was no one there. I was about to close the door again when i felt something poke me. “Ooooh. I like your jeans.” “Gah!” I jump back, to see a pink pony grinning at me. And not just any pink pony. THE pink pony. “P-Pinkie?!” I ask, then watch as the party animal trots into the living room. “Of course silly! Who else would have a poofy mane like this?!” She giggled using her forehoof to pat her head. “I- I-” I stuttered. This cannot be happening, this is not happening, ponies like her don’t exist. But then again, this is Pinkie Pie we’re talking about! The queen of breaking the fourth wall! “Wha-What the hell are you doing here?!” “I came to help you, Ronnie!” She retorts, hopping onto my blanket. She knows my name?! What is going on?! Maybe I’m dreaming, yeah that’s it, I fell asleep watching Too Many Pinkie Pies again. I slap myself and run into the kitchen to splash water on my face. After drying it, I glance over to the blanket to see she had disappeared. But then I heard hoofsteps approaching and my face paled. The steps silenced, and I thought for sure she was gone. I sigh a breath of relief before turning around to be faced with a pink haired girl. “What in the- Are you human?!” Pinkie tilted her head. “Isn’t that what you are?” “That wasn’t you were five seconds ago!” I thanked my lucky stars my mom wasn’t home. She would kill me of she found out i had an animal, er, person in the house! But she’s not even a person! She’s a pony! Well a pony that can turn into a person! Aw what am I saying! “Well i thought this would make you more comfortable.” She grinned and then ruffled my hair. My cheeks started to burn. “You’re naked! That makes me even less comfortable!” She looks down at herself. “Oh. Do you have any clothes I can borrow?” I heard the lock on the door start to turn and I started to panic. “No time! Just, turn back into a pony and hide in my closet or something! Go!” I scoot her along and hear her burrow under my bed. I sigh, and put on a smile as my mom greets me. “Who were you just talking to?” She asks. She’s always had this idea that i talk to myself. I do, even in public sometimes, but still, she gets worried. I think I get it from my dad. He does it a lot. “Uh... My friend! Pinkamena!” I lie. Well, half lie. Pinkie wasn’t my friend. In fact she was more of an annoyance. “Alright, well, I’m going to lay down. Don’t get into any trouble.” I watch as my mom leaves and goes to her room and wait until she locks her door before I ran into mines. Pinkie jumped out at me causing me to lose my balance and almost bang my head on the wall. “Will you sit down for once?!” I snap. She claps her hoofs together and she becomes human again. She pouts crossing her arms across her bare chest. “It’s not fun.” “I dont care.” I retorted. I dig in my drawer and find a pair of sweats and a shirt for her to wear. “Wowza! You like Pokemon?!” She gasps at the pink Pickachu top I just threw at her. “Yes, now dress yourself before I start getting... thoughts.” I grumble. She puts on the outfit and then lays across my bed, her boobs jiggling under the shirt. “Christ Pinkie, why do you have such huge tits?” She half shrugs. “I dunno, when Twilight turned me into a human for the first time, they just...appeared. Why do you?” I look down at my own chest. Mine are pretty big, but hers were a bit bigger. “Because I was born this way.” Which was true. Big tits ran in my family. She giggles. “If you think mine are huge, you should see Fluttershy’s!” “F-Fluttershy’s?! You all can turn into humans?!” She nods. “Twilight can do that type of magic now.” I blink. “Seriously Pinkie, what are you talking about? And why do I need your help? Did Twilight or Celestia send you?” “I think you should sit down for this one.” She says, patting the spot next to her. Whatever she had to tell me, it was going to sound seriously crazy. > How Do you like them apples? > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Sorry i havent been on in a while. Ive been busy. I went to Big Apple Ponycon last weekend. It was fun. okay. here’s the next chapter! :D “See, there was this book in Twilight’s library!” Pinkie exclaimed. She had been trying to explain this to me for over an hour now and I’m just getting the jist of what she was saying. “And? What does this have to do with anything?” I prodded. I was getting a major headache from all the dancing around the subject she was doing. “Well, it was this weird spell, and I wanted to see what it did, so I asked her to perform it. I wanted the other girls to see-” “Wait, the other girls? You mean Dash, AJ, Rarity and Shy, right?” I questioned. “Well duh! What other girls could I be talking about?!” Pinkie joked. I snorted. “With you? Who knows?” She laughed a little and then continued. “Well around three hours later, we all piled in the middle of the library to see Twilight perform the spell. It was dimension traveling spell and she was really excited about it. We all were.” I nodded. Traveling spell. Okay. That made sense. I mean how else could she have gotten here? “Okay. Then what happened?” “Twilight performed the spell but I think something went wrong.” She responded thoughtfully. “What do you mean?” I ask. “Well there was a great big flash and everything just changed.” “Did your molecules get all rearranged?” I joked. She obviously didn’t get the joke. “Huh? No. But we did all get separated.” “Soooo what does this have to do with me?” I tell her. Her story was useful in telling me how she got here, but not as to why she was in my house, wearing my clothes. “I saw you walk home from the bus stop today. I thought you needed a friend so here I am!” She beamed, throwing her arms out as if to present herself to me. “Yay?” As much as I loved Pinkie’s lucky-go-happy attitude, I wasn’t buying it. She needed me for something. She saw the skeptical look on my face. “Okay, okay, when we traveled to your dimension me and the other girls got separated and I need your help finding them.” “Nope.” “Please?” “No.” “Ronnie!” She whined, her eyes shining with tears. I almost gave in right then and there but like I had heard her say in Party of One, “I said, no!” And then the most unthinkable, most terrifying thing happened. Pinkie Pie’s hair flattened, and she turned into Pinkamena Diane Pie. Needless to say, I was scared shitless. In pony form, I realized, she would be murderous and aggressive. But as a human....Pinkamena was devilishly seductive. Freaking hot even. She grinned, and I blushed. She put her hand on my knee and slid it up to my thigh. “Please Ronnie?” She pleaded. God that was so freaking hot. I mean yeah she’s a pony still, but in human form just, holy crap. “I-I” I stuttered. She kissed me softly on my lips. “I’ll do it!” Immediately her hair poofs up again and she giggles. “Yay!” Oh my god, what just happened? “You’re lucky today is Friday. That means we can spend tomorrow looking for them. But how are you sure that they are in my town?” She pointed to her twitching ear. “Pinkie sense!” “Of course.” I groaned. I looked at the clock. It was about eleven thirty. Jeez that girl can talk. I stretch. “You can stay here until we find everyone else.” I offered even though I really didn’t want to. But if there’s one thing this show taught me, it’s being that being nice to people is a good thing no matter who it is. She quickly hugs me, our boobs squishing together making me gasp before curling up on the floor. “Uh, what are you doing?” I ask her. “This is normally how I sleep.” She explains. “Like a dog?” I question. She nods. “Okay well, you’re human now so get your but up here.” I tell her patting the side of my bed I wasn’t on. She hops in, and snuggles ups to me. “Thanks again, Ronnie.” she sighs sleepily. “You’re welcome Pinkie Pie.” And with that we drifted off to sleep.' The next day, I got up early to make sure Pinkie didn’t touch anything- And that my mom didn’t see Pinkie. I sighed in relief when i remembered she had left early to go to work. I made breakfast and sat in front of the TV remembering that it was 10:30. I made sure Pinkie was still asleep so that I could watch the new episode without having to explain anything to her. It was too early in my day for that. When she finally did wake, it was 12:00. I was already dressed and had eaten already. She greeted me, before following suit, and it was about one before we had headed out to the bus stop. While we waited i decided to ask her, “Who are we looking for first?” She shrugged. “Whoever turns up first.” I thought for a moment. “Hmm. Why don’t we go to the mall? We might find Rarity there.” She beamed. “That’s a great idea!” The bus stopped in front of us and we both got on. As we got on, I made sure to look at each passenger. Maybe they were one of the mane six. But then i realized something. I know what they look like as ponies, but i had no idea what they looked like as humans. Normally this wouldn’t be a big deal, but when I was helping Pinkie actually track them all down, yeah, it kinda was. Even so, it couldn’t hurt to look, right? I scanned the bus again, and a girl with blonde hair stood out to me. Her hat was in her lap, her face twisted in concentration on whatever she was playing in her phone. Her outfit was from what I could tell of it a plaid shirt with dark blue skinny jeans and brown boots. I nudged Pinkie. “Correct me if I’m wrong, but I think I’ve found AppleJack.” I pointed her to where the girl was sitting and she observed her herself. “I think you’re right! There’s only one way to find out!” the pink haired girl responded, before leaning over me to get a better view. “Hey! She’s even got the red ribbon in her hair!” I craned my neck and sure enough the girl did. Her eyes flicked up towards us and i gasped. Her eyes were green. The shade of green that would be on one of the apples i see at the grocery store. She caught me staring and smirked, her freckles showing themselves. I blushed. “That,” I panted as Pinkie giggled, “Is definitely AppleJack.” “So how are we going to get her attention?” Pinkie asked, snapping me out of my trance. How were we going to do that? It’s not like we could go up to her and tell her she was a pony. That was crazy! And it would draw unwanted attention. We really didn't need that. Pinkie’s vibrant hair and bright personality was already an attraction. The bus stopped and the man sitting next to the girl got up. I saw this as my chance to move closer to her so I can talk. I figured I’d be the one to ease the subject onto each one of them, instead of Pinkie jumping in their faces. But as I got up to walk over to her, the bus jerked and i tripped, falling right into the mystery girl’s lap. She looked down at me shocked. I blushed before asking, “Mind if I sit next to you?” > Art of The Hipster > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- thanks for all the good reviews! here’s the next chapter! :) “The name’s Ronnie.” I say, lifting myself up and sitting down next to her. “What’s yours?” “Ashley.” the girl responded, her southern twang sending shivers down my spine. “Cool. So, Ashley, whatcha doing here in New York?” I ask. I’m gonna ease my way into this as nicely and slowly as possible. We don’t need to freak her out or anything. Especially if she really is AppleJack. “Mah granny owns an apple orchard upstate. Ah live up there with my big brother and my little sister.” Bingo. I might be onto something. But what i don't understand is why can Pinkie remember who she is and not AppleJack? Is it just that she has the ability to? Does that mean the other girls will need convincing as well? Wow I have my work cut out for me. “Ah was sent down here ta go to school.” “Where?” I ask. I really hope she isn't gonna say- "Roosevelt High.” Goddamit. Well, at least her going to my school will better my chances of talking to her and getting her to remember. I just hope the rest of them aren't going to be doing that. “Oh sweet, you’ll be going to school with me.” I say and smile. She grins back at me. “So where ya headed sugarcube?” Ding! Ding Ding! I think we’ve found a winner! Though i don't believe her saying that automatically makes her AJ... More evidence is needed. “The mall. My pink haired friend and I are looking for a friend and we might need your help.” I tell her, pointing to Pinkie. Pinkie smiles and waves wildly at us. Ashley’s blonde eyebrows furrow. “Is she always that happy?” I have no doubt in my mind that was AppleJack’s first impression of the princess of party. “Yeah, you get used to it.” I wave off. “Well, Ah was actually heading that way. Ah need to find me a new hat.” She explained, holding up her tattered Stenson. “Oh, alright. Thanks, Ash.” Ahh I’ve only known her for like 10 minutes and I already gave her a nickname! What is wrong with me?! The bus finally makes it to the mall and me, Pinkie and Ashley get off. “Alright I say we go this way!” I point towards the third floor where only the rich or more privileged people shop. I’m sure Rarity would be hanging out there. We make our way into the mall and onto the escalator in the front. Pinkie was jumping up and down with excitement. “Oooh! I hope she’s as stylish as I remember!” she gushed, squeezing the railing so tight I thought she was gonna break it. “Not to bud into your business, hun, but who exactly are you two girls lookin’ for?” Ashley asked. “Rarity Belle. Ring any bells?” I laugh at my own joke and Pinkie joins in too. The name seemed to strike a chord in Ashley and her face went blank for a second. I think we did nab the right girl. “Rarity Belle? Why of course Ah know Rarity! She’s the best seamstress in Ponyville!” AppleJack said proudly. Pinkie and I threw our arms around each other. We got one! One down, four to go! Before we went off to look for Rarity we explained everything that has happened in the past few hours. AJ caught up pretty quickly and we decided to start looking. We past a few stores like Coach and Victoria’s Secret but still no Rarity. And then Pinkie started twitching. “Twitchy Twitch!” she said as she shook all over. “I know where she is!” God did Pinkie Sense come in handy. “Yes? Spit it out darlin’!” AppleJack prodded. “Hollister!” She answers, point to the store in front of us. Seriously? We were that unobservant? We high tail it in there and search around. I didn’t see her at first, but when i turned a little to the left, there she was in a dark pair of skinny and a designer flannel shirt. The red beanie on her head contrasted well with her purple hair. It was a deep royal purple that also contrasted well with her brown skin. She adjusted the glasses on her face as she passed through rack after rack of clothes. “I thought she’d be more-” “Hauty?!” “Fru Fruey?” Pinkie and AJ finish for me. “Yeah. But she’s a total hipster!” “Better hipster than fru fruey.” AppleJack mumbled as we walked into the store. AJ was the first one to approach her. “Hay there sugarcube!” She greeted trying to be friendly. Rarity looked up at her with curiosity. “Hello. Is there something you need from me?” Rarity responded formally. Wow even dressed like that she still had that polite hoity voice. “Actually yes. Mah friends and I were wondern’ if you have seen someone named Rarity Belle?” AppleJack asked cautiously, “Darling of course I would know myself! What kind of silliness are you talking AppleJack?” Rarity responded after a beat of silence. What. How did that happen so fast? Is there some kind of trigger word for them to remember? Like their under a hypnosis or something? Pinkie squealed. “Rarity!” She pulls her into a tight hug. “Pinkie darling, why are you so excited to see me?” Rarity asks. “We’ve been separated for like, three days!” Pinkie responds, holding up three fingers in her face. Three days isn't really a lot of time, but it is a lot when you count the fact that three other girls are still missing. Twilight might be hanging around the library, Fluttershy might be at the pet store downstairs, and something tells me Rainbow might be the hardest to find. “How exactly are we going to find the others?” AppleJack asked, whispering in my ear. “I have no idea.” I say, watching Pinkie hug Rarity tightly. We could start now, but I had to be home before dark and there was no time to go anywhere else if I was going to make it before then. “Okay here’s the plan. We will go back to my house and recuperate. Sunday we will look for everyone else and if we can't find the girls then we can try my school on Monday. Got it?” Everyone nodded. “Great. Now let’s go!” With some explanation to my mom about having some friends sleep over, I was in the clear. By the time we got settled in, it was about 9:00. “Alright. Now, what do you guys remember before meeting me and Pinkie?” “Ah remember wakin’ up in a cornfield upstate. Met some people who reminded me of mah family back home. Said mah name was Ashley.” AppleJack started, rubbing her chin. “Ooh Ashley! What a quaint name for you, AppleJack! Oh you must let me call you that from now on!” Rarity insisted. AJ blushed. “Uh, thanks Rar, but I would like to just be called the name my Ma and Pa gave me.” Rarity pouted and then smiled. “Ah what a shame! Oh well no use pushing a mule that won’t budge! I’ve always admired the way you stand your ground, AppleJack.” AJ blushed even harder, and started rubbing behind her neck. “Thanks, Rar.” “Is there something going on between those two?” I ask Pinkie as AJ and Rarity slip into their own conversation for the moment. Pinkie shrugged. “Ever since Look Before You Sleep there’s been sexual tension between them.” “There’s been what?” I ask glaring at her incredulously. Okay how does she know about that episode let alone the show itself?! She seemed to be reading my mind before she said, “You left your laptop open and your DVR on plus I’m the queen of breaking the 4th wall I think I would know this.” I stare at her for a long moment before going, “Okay! Rarity! What about you?!” The sound of my voice made her jump a little, no doubt indicating the fact that she was deeply interested in what her and the farm pony, er, girl, were discussing. “Well I woke up in a subway car. I was in the upper east side of Manehattan.” “You mean Manhattan.” I corrected her. I forgot all the name puns would stick with them when they entered this world. “Yes, and it was awful! It was smelly and dirty and oh! It was horrendous!” “What’s the worst that could have happened?” I ask. She was being so damn over dramatic. I’m pretty sure shes just being a drama queen. “I woke up next to a hobo!” She whined. “Oh.” We all said in unison. I yawned. “As much as I’d love to hear the rest of your story Rarity, we need to sleep so that we can get up early enough to find Dash, Twi and Flutters.” She nods, and then yawns herself. “I agree. After all a lady needs her beauty sleep.” I roll my eyes as I get into bed and and hear everyone else settle in. “Goodnight guys.” “Good night Ronnie.” I heard before drifting to sleep. > Keep Not So Calm And Flutter On > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- When I woke up, I woke up to the smell of bacon. My mom usually leaves early but never really cooks before she leaves so I went to investigate. Turns out it was Rarity cooking breakfast. Pinkie was sitting in front of the tv watching some stupid cartoon, and Applejack was sitting at the table with a cup of coffee. “Mornin’ sugarcube!” She greeted me. “Hey AJ.” I said. “You guys got up early?” She nodded then gestured to Pinkie. “She woke us up with her singing. Didn’t you hear her?” I shook my head. “No. I’m a heavy sleeper.” And thank god I was because I wouldn’t be able to take it. Just then, my stomach grumbled. “Oh darling, are you hungry?” Rarity asks me, putting a plate in front of me as I sit down at the table with Applejack. “Yeah.” I responded, looking hungrily at the stack of pancakes in front of me. She gave me a fork and I began to eat. “So how are we gonna go about finding the other girls?” Applejack asks. “I don’t know. We could start with the library. We might find Twilight there. Not too sure where we could find Fluttershy and Dash though.” I told her, chewing on a piece of pancake. “Can we talk about this later? I’m trying to watch cartoons!” Pinkie shouted, turning around to glare at us. I narrowed my eyes at her. She’s the one who dragged me into this. She should be the one come up with suggestions, Not me. Freaking Pinkie. Rarity rolls her eyes before speaking. “I wish we could just call them and ask them where they are! If only there was some type of device that would let us talk to them without having to leave!” She said thoughtfully. “You mean, a cell phone?” I asked, amused. “A what? What in tarnation is that?!” Applejack asks. “What Rarity just described. It’s something like that.” I explained, pulling out my Samsung Galaxy 4. I handed it to Rarity and she weighed it in her hands. “So, this little...device. It can call anyone?” She asks, eyeing my Wonder Woman AJ backgound. “That’s correct.” I say. “Lemme see that.” AJ says. She takes the phone from Rarity and looks at it. “Huh. Is that supposed ta be me?” She asks, pointing to my wallpaper. I start to feel the back of my ears burn. “Uh, yeah.” She shrugs. “Can’t say Ah don’t like it.” I sigh in relief as she put it back down on the table. “Calling them would definitely make things easier but since I know they are all just as clueless as you guys were a few minutes ago so I doubt they have a cell phone.” “Why don’t we put up fliers?” Pinkie suggests, finally removing herself from in front of the TV. I don't know when she decided to help but I’m glad she did. “Like, missing person posters?” I ask. “Not really. We could say you lost your dog Sophie and put posters up all over town. We can find Fluttershy that way!” She says. “H-How did you know I have a dog named Sophie?!” I ask. “Just a hunch.” She shrugs. A hunch my ass! Her fourth wall breaking is freaking me the heck out! “How’re we gonna do that?” Applejack asks. “Simple. We put up posters, let Sophie off her leash while following close behind, hope for the best and BAM! Instant Fluttershy!” “You’re insane!” I tell her. “No, I’m Pinkie!” She says, smiling. I want to smack her so badly but Rarity puts a hand on my shoulder, the other one pressed up to her temple in annoyance. “Just ignore her deery, she’s not quite right in the head.” She reassures me. Though I don't think that was quite reassuring. I sigh. “Alright. Just let me get dressed and we can go ahead with your stupid plan.” Pinkie squees and I mush her in her face. It’s too early for this. After getting ready and finishing my pancakes, we get my dog and held out, but not before making the fake missing dog posters. After looking for the perfect spot and putting up posters,we let Sophie off her leash. As expected she wandered off, and we followed close behind. She walked about three blocks, before a girl who looked strangely familiar came into view. She had willowy light pink hair, and a frail, delicate looking body. She looked to be about two years older than me, about my height, and she shrunk as she walked down the street with her backpack close to her. She looks up to see the lost dog poster we posted earlier and gasps. “A lost dog? Oh my, that’s terrible!” she said, her voice barely normal volume. Sophie walked up to her and sniffed her as me, Pinkie, Rarity, and AJ waited behind a fence keeping watch. “Oh hello little one. Where is your owner?” Sophie tilted her head as if she didn’t understand the question, and wagged her tail. “Oh, you have no collar. Oh poor thing. Your owner must be so worried about you.” The girl reached out and petted Sophie, earning her a welcoming bark. She looked up at the poster then looked down at Sophie. “O-Oh my. You’re the missing dog.” She said, looking around. She scooped her up, and continued walking, looking like she was hoping no one thought she was stealing her. I saw it as my and AJ’s cue to step out. “Hey Fl- I mean, girl I’ve never met before!” I yell. “Nice save.” Applejack says sarcastically, rolling her eyes. I ignore her. The girl stammers, “W-Who? M-Me?” “Yes you! I’m so glad you found my dog! We were looking all over for her. Right, Applejack?” I ask. “Yep. Sure was.” She agreed. “Your name is Applejack?” The girl asks. “Yeah. Why?” “I used to have a friend named Applejack back when I was a po- Oh! That would sound just silly!” She said, stopping herself. I grin. “Were you about to say a ‘pony’?” I ask. “Y- Yes b-but I d-didn't think you would believe me!” “Of course we would Fluttershy! Why wouldn’t we?!” Pinkie bubbles. “P-Pinkie Pie?!” Fluttershy stutters. “Oh Fluttershy, it’s so nice to see you again, darling!” Rarity calls as she too steps out from the shadows. “R-Rarity?” Fluttershy was utterly confused. I wouldn’t blame her. I’d be confused as all hell too if I were a pony that somehow got turned into a human and then suddenly happened to come upon her friends. She had put Sophie down by now, and was staring at all of us in disbelief. “I- I-” Poor girl couldn’t even get the sentence out before she fainted. “Well, that went well.” I mumbled under my breath.