> Like a Cupcake Without the Frosting and Other Twinkie Tales > by Fission > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- > Like a Cupcake Without the Frosting > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Pinkie Pie had been acting strange lately, and not her typical brand of strangeness.  She had been quiet, even taciturn by her standards, as of late. On any normal occasion, Twilight Sparkle would have had no difficulty getting the baker to tell her all about her day.  Pinkie Pie was normally all too happy to oblige, often recounting the day’s events before her marefriend had even inquired.  Not recently, though.  Things had just been…odd, and Pinkie Pie had been unusually tight-lipped. Beyond this, Pinkie Pie had taken to inexplicably vanishing for hours at a time.  Usually, it was all too easy to find her, as she would either be at Sugarcube Corner, the Library, or gabbing away to somepony on the street.  During these disappearances, nopony that Twilight asked had seen Pinkie lately, and her own best efforts hadn’t gotten her much further, as Pinkie just didn’t seem to be anywhere she looked. Of course, Pinkie Pie did not seem to be too keen on telling Twilight where she spent her afternoons, either.  Whenever she was questioned, the responses were always cryptic, and usually involved preparing for “a great party on the horizon”.  Pinkie Pie would be Pinkie Pie, of course, but Twilight couldn’t remember any sort of time where she had been this focused for such a long period of time.  Frankly, it was a bit unsettling. What, exactly, was going on?  None of the other girls seemed to be worried.  Every time that Twilight would bring the subject up, they would simply reference the fact that Pinkie Pie’s actions very rarely made sense in the first place. But nopony knew Pinkie as well as Twilight.  Though her friends’ reasoning wasn’t terrible, it overlooked an important fact.  Pinkie’s actions indeed did make sense, but merely on a system of logic slightly skewed with the norm.  However, no matter how she examined the evidence, Twilight couldn’t discover the solution. Perhaps it had to do with their relationship.  If there was one thing that Twilight was not well-versed in, it was definitely the matters of love.  That could possibly explain why no sort of explanation had sprung to mind.  Matters of romance were simply not second nature to Twilight, like most other disciplines.  It wasn’t like doing a bit of research would hurt, anyway. And researched she had.  She had read all of the books before, when she had first asked Pinkie Pie on a date, so at least they were somewhat familiar.  But now, she focused on different sections then before, hoping to derive something, anything that could help her discover what was going on. The books were able to provide much more information pertinent to the situation than when she had consulted them before.  However, the results weren’t particularly encouraging.  Long stretches of absence, vague excuses, lack of communication; all are signs of a relationship that is likely deteriorating, whether due to infidelity, or simply lack of interest. Alright, Twilight, just calm yourself down.  Logic got you this far, don’t jump to conclusions now.  Could their relationship really be deteriorating?  She certainly still cared for Pinkie Pie, and at least she had enjoyed the time they had spent together recently.  Maybe it’s possible, but I can’t understand why.  Thankfully, she could at least rule out infidelity—despite the fact that Pinkie Pie was capable of many things that didn’t seem possible, Twilight knew that she absolutely would not be able to conceal something of that nature. However, a loss of interest was not so easy a possibility to dismiss.  Sure, Twilight still loved Pinkie, and she enjoyed her marefriend’s presence as much as always, she could not read Pinkie’s mind. In fact, the more she thought about it, the more likely it seemed that Pinkie simply did not feel the same spark as before.  Though Pinkie did not make a habit of conforming to social norms, this was about the only explanation that fit in the slightest. Does she still want to be with me? Is she…is she going to leave me? The door opened behind Twilight.  She twisted her head around to see Pinkie entering.  Come to think of it, it was one of very few occasions Twilight had witnessed her simply walking through the door.  Maybe it was just Twilight, but the baker looked unsettled. “Hey, Twilight, could we, uh, take a walk?  I kinda need to talk to you about something.” No.  Not those words.  Those are not the words I want to hear right now. No, I don’t want to have ‘a talk’.  “Of course, Pinkie, that sounds fine with me.” Her hooves dragged slightly as Pinkie led her forward.  They stopped at the edge of Ponyville, and the floodgates opened. “Pinkie Pie, please don’t break up with me!  I don’t know what I did, but I can do it better.  You know how good I am at figuring things out.”  Tears streamed down her face as she babbled, barely comprehensible, “Just let me figure this out.  I promise that I can be a better marefriend than this.  You just need to give me a chance.” “What?” recoiled Pinkie Pie, genuine shock showing on her face.  “I love you.  Why would I want to break up with you, silly filly?” “I knew you were going to.  That’s what all the books said you were going to do.  And then the ‘let’s take a walk.  I need to talk to you about something.’  I mean, how could you be any more obvious than that?  You weren’t spending any time—” Pinkie gently put a hoof to her marefriend’s lips, shushing her.  “It’s okay Twilight, just give your auntie Pinkie Pie a chance to explain everything.  I Pinkie promise that it’s going to make sense.  I just need you to try to turn that frown upside-down for me.  Please?” Twilight sniffled.  “I…I guess so, if you’re really not going to break up with me.” “That’s better.”  Pinkie pulled her into a tight hug.  “Now just let me explain.  Twilight, right after we met, when I said you were the cutest, smartest, all around best pony, I wasn’t kidding.  Without you, I would be like a cupcake without the frosting, and you know how much I hate those!” Twilight smiled at this.  Perhaps trying to cut down on Pinkie’s sugar intake had not been her best idea. “You know, being your marefriend is super fun.  But that on its own doesn’t mean that we’re going to be together forever and ever.  So I asked myself ‘Pinkie Pie, you don’t want to be a cupcake without frosting, right?’  And of course, I didn’t.  So I kept wondering what I could do about that.  I mean, that’s the kind of thing you don’t ever want to happen.  It’s why we keep extra frosting in the basement at Sugarcube Corner, just in case we ever run out. “So I wondered what my extra frosting could be.  I think you might call it a failsafe or something.  And eventually I thought of something.  Maybe I spent a little too long away from you picking them out, and I’m sorry about that.” Twilight felt one hoof leave her back.  “Pinkie, what are you talking about?  What are you doing?” “Twilight, this is what I’ve been doing for the last month.  I’m sorry I couldn’t tell you, but I just couldn’t ruin the surprise.”  She pulled away from the hug, revealing a small black box in her hooves. “Pinkie, is that what—” “Twilight Sparkle,” Pinkie Pie began with a giddy grin on her face, “Will you make me the happiest mare in Equestria?”  She opened the box, revealing two jeweled bracelets, one purple and one pink. “No, Pinkie.  You already made me the happiest mare in Equestria.  It’s physically impossible for two mares to both be the happiest—” Suddenly Pinkie Pie was upon her, pushing her onto her back, kissing her feverishly.  Instead of pausing for the occasional breath, as Twilight did, Pinkie spoke feverishly whenever her mouth was unoccupied, “TwilightImsosorryIcantbelieveIletyouthinkthatIwasgoingtobreakupwithyouIloveyousomuch” Twilight pulled away for a moment to catch her breath, giving Pinkie a knowing smirk as she looked her straight in the eyes.  “What?  Did you think that I was worried or something?” > Just a Quick Break > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Twelve books.  That’s what I have to do.  Princess Celestia is counting on me to read these.  I can’t let her down. Even for a self-proclaimed bibliophile like Twilight, the task was awfully daunting for a single weekend.  After all, there were few ponies who could read a single book in a day, much less the four that Twilight had to average.  But if there was one thing Twilight would not mind being shut in with for an entire weekend, that thing was most certainly books, maybe I wouldn’t mind spending a weekend with one pony in particular, she thought as her mind wandered.  She quickly shook the thought from her head; that was for later.  It was book time, after all. To this point, she was done with the first two books, and was about a quarter of the way through her third.  Distractions had been minimal, thankfully.  Maybe Spike had come by earlier to tell her something, but she really couldn’t remember what it had been about.  Other than that, it had been smooth sailing on the sea of knowledge.  Of course, this would not last. “Hey Twilight, whatcha doin?” She turned around and was greeted by a pink snout only inches from her own.  She reflexively began to back up, only to nearly knock down the desk she was reading at. “Pinkie Pie, how did you possibly get in here so quietly?” “Quietly?  I tripped over the books on the ground three times on the way up here.  You just didn’t notice because you were reading your book.” She ruffled Twilight’s mane as she continued, “When you’re reading, I could practically throw a party in here without you noticing.  But obviously I wouldn’t do that because the party would be no fun if you didn’t notice!  I mean, what kind of party is it without the most awesome mare in—“ “Pinkie, I get it.  Maybe I block things out a bit when I read, but it’s just a matter of concentration.  Princess Celestia trusts me to read these books over the weekend, and I’m not going to let her down.  Every time that I get distracted just makes it harder.” “Twilight, you silly filly, I bet Princess Celestia just sent you all of these books because she thought you would like them.  I mean, if I had a bunch of books, of course I would send them to you.  You like books more than anypony else in Ponyville, so what else would I do with them?  Besides, why do you think you need to read them all this weekend anyway?” replied Pinkie Pie. “Well, I was going to send in my next friendship report Monday, so I assumed that the Princess would want my analyses of these books at our next contact.” “Twilight, you know sometimes you can be so boring!  Who says the Princess needs you to read all of these books?  You know, you need to loosen up a bit sometimes.  How about we go to Sugarcube Corner and you help me bake some new cupcakes?  I got some brand new purple sprinkes that I bet you would like.” “Pinkie, just because you never worry about anything—“ “And you like it,” Pinkie added, raising her eyebrows. “Well, yes, I like it,” Twilight responded, getting flustered.  “But that’s beside the point.” “Of course it isn’t, Twilight.  Just because you’re Ponyville’s smartest pony doesn’t mean that you have to spend all of your time reading silly old books.  Remember, you’re also Ponyville’s cutest pony.  It can’t hurt to take a break every once in a while.” She threw a hoof around Twilight’s shoulders and pulled her close.  “Come on, I’ll make it worth it for you,” she added, giving Twilight a wink. Twilight returned a nervous smile and a blush.  “Well, I guess I can take a bit of a break; I do need to de-stress.  It can’t be too long though.” “Oh, don’t worry, Twilight.” Pinkie gave her a quick peck on the cheek.  “Short breaks can be fun, too.” > The Proof is in the Pudding > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- “Pinkie, have you been up to something lately?” “Of course I’m up to something, Twilight!  I’m up to talking to you!  I thought you would know that already,” replied Pinkie perkily. “No Pinkie, not like that.  There have been some shady things going on, and, well, as much as I trust  you and the rest of the girls, I’m not sure these could point to anyone other than you.” “What sort of things have been going on?” asked Pinkie Pie, furrowing her brow. “Well, just the other day someone held up Bon-Bon’s candy shop.  If I’m remembering right, I think she told me that they said ‘Give me all the sugar before you make me point my party cannon at your precious little store!’” “Wow!   Somepony else owns a party cannon?  I thought it would be cool if I had the only one.” “Pinkie, it was you, wasn’t it?” Twilight asked flatly. “Oh, yeah, it was me.  I don’t think that anypony else likes sugar enough to do that!”  You’re such a good detective, Twilight. “Okay, so that was you,” Twilight confirmed.  Pinkie simply nodded.  “And I’m guessing the frosting graffiti on the town hall ‘Cupcakes rule, muffins drool’ was you, too. “Yep.” “And when Miss Cheerilee’s office was filled with beach balls…” “I exhausted my whole supply on that one.  Now who knows what will happen if we have a ball emergency!?” Twilight eyed her curiously, looking for something more. “Okay…Is there any particular reason why you would decide to hold up a candy store, deface public property, and pull a prank on Ponyville’s only elementary school teacher?” “Well, originally I was only going to do the candy shop, but you weren’t quite as good of a detective as I thought, so I had to keep going for a while.” Twilight looked at her friend, puzzled. “So are you saying the only reason that you kept going is because nopony caught you?” “Well, kind of,” Pinkie Pie admitted. “I remembered the last time that there was a mystery, and how much of a super awesome detective you were then.” “So then…you wanted to get caught? “Sorta, but only if it was you!  I was just thinking about how much fun I had last time when you were researching my Pinkie sense, when you were following me around everywhere.  Then you took me down into your basement, and—well, I thought it might be going somewhere else—but it was still a lot of fun.  It made me feel like I was a really awesome pony when you were investigating me; like you thought I was special.” “Pinkie, are you really saying—“ Pinkie leaned over towards Twilight and softly kissed her on the cheek, drawing a visible blush from the purple mare.  “Yes, I am.” She continued, “After you started believing in my Pinkie sense, that’s when I overheard Rarity and Dashie talking about your crush on me.  I thought maybe if I made you start investigating me again, you might figure out on your own that I liked you too, but, like I said, you’re just a liiiiiitle bit worse at being a detective than I thought.”  She grinned softly. “Well, I think you’re the one who’s really the detective here.  You have me figured out perfectly, and that’s just the way I hoped things would be. “So, what should we do now?  I vote for baking cupcakes!” “Well,” Twlight chuckled.  “Cupcakes do sound nice, but I don’t think I can let you off for your crimes that easily.  I think maybe we should go apologize to Bon-Bon and Cheerilee, first.” “Oh yeah, maybe I can get my some of my balls back from the schoolhouse.  You know, nopony else seems to take the threat of a ball emergency seriously…”   > Feeling, Not Thought > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- So much can happen in just a second. With over eighty-thousand of them every day, how can a single one make so much difference?  Of course, that’s not to say that most of them don’t pass by the wayside, but it seems so strange that a single second could change the course of my entire life. There was a certain volatility that came with living in Ponyville.  Ever since Princess Celestia’s protégé, Twilight Sparkle, had arrived, there had been no shortage of spells-gone-awry, villains hell-bent on their destructive goals, or disasters of any sort.  The unicorn seemed to attract just about anything out of the ordinary.  As such, she had naturally become somewhat adept at coping with the unpredictable. One thing, however, that Twilight knew she could have never been prepared for, was something not on the catastrophic scale that so regularly threatened the inhabitants of Ponyville, but was instead a simple matter of realization.  The epiphany had blindsided her so thoroughly, but, in retrospect, seemed so absurdly obvious.  However, it was certainly understandable given her inexperience at the time.  If there was one matter that Twilight’s studies of friendship long neglected, it was the matter of love. In its romantic sense, Twilight had long lived outside of the influence of love.  Sure, she loved her friends dearly, and they meant more than most anything to her.  When it came to finding a stallion, though, she had never found the idea of falling in love appealing.  The prospect of caring about somepony so much that it could warp your perception of the world was, at the very least, uncomfortable.  After all, her mental faculties were one of the things that Twilight would very much prefer to keep intact. However, a pony as unpredictable as the city they lived in had other plans. When Pinkie suddenly confessed to her, Twilight had been at a loss for what to do.  She had never learned anything about how you could let a friend down gently, yet it was what she needed to do.  After all, she had never been positively disposed towards romance, and Pinkie Pie was obviously incompatible with her.  She quickly made up a contrived spiel about how it would affect their friendship too much, but as she opened her mouth to speak, something stopped her. Just for a second, she wondered why Pinkie Pie would have fallen in love with her.  They had been spending a lot of time together recently, and whenever Twilight answered the door, she hoped it would yield that same exuberant, infectious smile that Pinkie wore.  Pinkie had almost seemed sad whenever it was time for her to leave, and though Twilight knew she would be back tomorrow, she had felt that same reluctance to let her go. So, perhaps then Twilight could understand why Pinkie had fallen for her, but that did not mean that things would work out.  On a logical level, it was absurd; but on an emotional level…she actually had not considered the possibility.  Though the idea seemed so outwardly absurd to her, Twilight at least had to dignify Pinkie’s confession by figuring out what she felt. Of course, there was little to figure out.  In a single second, everything she had felt fit together beautifully, and it all added up to one brilliantly simple conclusion.  It explained so much about their interactions with each other.  And though there was no way Twilight could possibly understand it, she felt a trust towards Pinkie that everything would be fine.  It was the sort of trust that, against her better judgment, she did something for the first time in her life: She took a leap of faith. > Today > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Jan 2: Today is going to be the day.  It has to be the day.  In fact, there isn’t a single logical reason for why today should not be that day: the day that I tell Pinkie Pie how I feel. It has been exactly three months and two days since I realized that, perhaps, I might have some sort of feelings beyond typical friendship for Pinkie.  Though, perhaps I was initially distraught with this realization—after all, wouldn’t it get in the way of my studies of friendship if I were to let my relationship with one friend interfere with the others?  However, I felt something else at the time.  I realized that this was an opportunity, not just an impediment.  Instead of letting this interfere with my lessons on friendship, I could incorporate it into them.  Princess Celestia will undoubtedly be impressed if I tell her what I have learned about both friendship and love.  What I had to do quickly became clear: I had to empirically determine whether or not I truly had feelings for Pinkie Pie. Here I am now, at the end of the three month test period.  I have spent the last two days analyzing the data, and it all says the same thing.  I am definitively, categorically in love with Pinkie. What else is there to do now?  The next step in the progression is to tell her, for better or for worse.  This part, I know.  All of my research has indicated that all there is to do when you have feelings for somepony is to tell them.  But this presents a different problem.  Though I know it is what I have to do, I’m so nervous about it.  Pinkie Pie is one of the greatest mares in the world, and I know that she would let me down gently if she doesn’t feel the same way, but is that something that I want right now?  Is it better to be turned down immediately, or to hold out hope for what is likely a futile prospect?  The answer to that question is something that I definitely do not know. Though much of my research has indicated that love is a feeling, I am not sure that I believe this to be true.  Love, to me, seems to be something that you both know and feel; a matter of both heart and mind, as it were.  For all of the conflict between my heart and mind right now, they can agree on exactly one thing: I love Pinkie Pie.  I understand it intellectually, and I feel it just the same. If you truly love somepony, it is not the sort of feeling that will go away on its own.  Of course then it makes sense that the only real solution is to tell her.  Otherwise, I am only delaying the moment of judgment.  So, today has to be the day.  Nothing else would make sense. I do not know what I am so worried about anyway.  All I have to do is march over to Sugarcube Corner, look Pinkie right in those beautiful blue eyes.  She’ll probably say “hiya, Twilight” in that overexcited, delightful way that she always does.  She’ll ask me why I’m there, and instead of answering, I’ll lean forward to smell the frosting on her breath.  She’ll tilt her head just right and close her eyes ever so slightly If there’s one thing that I know I won’t do, it’s what I just wrote.  It’s like I have turned into some sort of giddy little schoolfilly just because I know that I’m in love.  Who would have guessed that would happen?  Anyway, I just need to keep my wits about me and approach this like a scientist.  Today is going to be the day.  I know it will.  In fact, I’m going to leave for Sugarcube Corner right now. I will include a detailed account in tomorrow’s entry, Twilight Sparkle Jan 3: In retrospect, yesterday was obviously not meant to be the day.  How in Equestria could you expect somepony to confess their love when they are immediately enlisted to help bake three hundred cupcakes? No matter, this is all going to be inconsequential later, because I know that this is the day.  Today is definitely going to be the day I tell Pinkie Pie.  If not today, then this is at least going to be the week that I tell her, or maybe the month… > The Very Best Pie > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- The kitchen of Sugarcube Corner looked like it had been through a hurricane.  Various confections and fruits were strewn throughout the interior, and the atmosphere was palpably frantic.  Though  this was nothing new for Pinkie Pie, it somewhat shocked Twilight Sparkle, who had never borne witness to what amounted to an average day’s work in the bakery.  Despite the apparent maelstrom, the baker was actually sitting somewhat pensively in the middle of the floor. “How about banana cream?  Maybe coconut cream?” she asked, not actually waiting for Twilight’s answer, “Hmm, actually, I think something more fruity would be good.  Tell me, Twilight, how does a nice lemon meringue sound to you?” “Lemon meringue sounds delicious, actually.  Can you tell me again why finding the perfect filling for this pie is quite so important?  You’ve spent the last thirty minutes deliberating on it.” Pinkie Pie scurried back to work, searching for the requisite ingredients for the lemon meringue filling. “Everything needs to be perfect, Twilight!” she asserted, peeling the skin from a lemon, “This is going to be my magnum opie.  Everypony knows that the most important part of any pie is the filling, so we need to pick out the perfect filling for the perfect pie!” She cautiously took a taste of the filing she was preparing.  “Lemon meringue!  What was I thinking?  What we need is a key lime pie!” “Pinkie, couldn’t you just make more than one pie?  That way you can make several different flavors without worrying so much about what particular filling to use.” Pinkie Pie eyed her sternly before replying, “You have good ideas, Sparkle.  I like that,” she said gruffly, “what do you say you come over to my place for some coffee after we finish baking this pie, sweet thing?” Twilight chuckled and opened her mouth to reply before she was interrupted. “Oh wait, we’re already in my place!  We can’t go to my place if we’re already here,” Pinkie giggled, her voice returning to normal.  “Well, I guess it would work if we left first, and went on a walk or something.  And you know, we’re not technically in my place; it’s really the Cake’s place since they own Sugarcube Corner.  I guess my place would just be my own room, and we’re in the kitchen so—” “Well, yes Pinkie, I suppose that’s true.  However, regardless of whatever technicalities we may decide to acknowledge, I would love to get some coffee with you afterwards.” She nuzzled close to Pinkie.  “Of course, you still haven’t told me why it’s so important just to make one pie.” “Twilight, you know what day it is, right?  Of course we have to make one super delicious pie instead of a bunch of normal-delicious ones.  That’s the only way to honor the holiday!” Twilight thought to herself for a moment.  “Oh, I forgot that today was pi day!  I guess I see what you mean now.  Though it’s a bit silly to ‘honor’ pi, it is a very important and fundamental constant.”  She sniffed at the air briefly.  “Hey, Pinkie, do you smell something burning?” Pinkie furrowed her brows for an instant, thinking, before gasping.  “The crust! We put it in the oven  before we started talking about the filling!  It’s only supposed to cook for ten minutes, and now it’s cooked for like…three pie-crust-baking-times!” she wailed. “Well, four, actually,” corrected Twilight, looking at the clock. Pinkie Pie was not listening.  She was racing towards the oven making sure that the crust had not yet caught on fire.   She threw open the oven door and retrieved the pie tin within. “How are we supposed to make the best pie ever now?” she whimpered, looking at the blackened mess in her hooves.  Tears formed at the corners of her eyes as she continued, “This was supposed to be the perfect pi day.” Twilight sat down beside her and placed a hoof around her shoulder. “Pinkie, I know how much this meant to you.  Would it be any better if I helped you make a new pie?” Pinkie nodded and quietly mumbled, “mhmm.” Twilight squeezed her tight and kissed her right on the tip of her nose.  “You know, as far as I’m concerned, I already have the very best pie in the world right here.”