Fancy Rusticity

by FoxeyHound

First published

Fancypants looks to put his life back together after learning Fleur de Lis has been cheating on him

Fancypants discovers that his fiancée—Fleur de Lis—was cheating on him for a long time, and that she was marrying him just for his money. This upsetting bit of news thrusts the stallion onto a path of rehabilitation. His struggle of putting the pieces back together isn't done alone, though as a certain fashionista from Ponyville lends a helping hoof.

Chapter I

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"I know I've said this multiple times already, but I can't leave tonight without letting you know one more time how absolutely thankful I am for this dress you made me!"

"Oh darling," Rarity retorted. "You're most certainly welcome, but it really is no--UMF!"

The rest of Rarity's comment was interrupted by a tight embrace from her lavender unicorn friend Twilight Sparkle. Though she was caught off guard, the sentiment was soon returned as she wrapped her hooves around her friend as well.

"Oooh, group hug! Count me in!"

The high-pitched, enthusiastic voice was soon followed by more pressure on Rarity's back; her spontaneous and hyperactive friend Pinkie Pie was now clinging onto her and Twilight. The voices of three other ponies were heard not long afterward.

"Don't chy'all forget about me now!" Applejack hollered.

"Make room for Rainbow!" Rainbow Dash commanded.

"Oh, can I join in?" Fluttershy asked demurely.

Pretty soon all six friends were bundled up together in a tight hug as they simultaneously gave a sigh of joy and love. It was a brief moment, but it felt much longer than it was to all of them. Pretty soon, however, they all untangled themselves and got situated once again. Rarity stood in the ballroom doorway and waved goodbye to all of them.

"I'll see you all tomorrow!" called Rarity. "Hope you get back home safe!"

Her friends replied with various kinds of answers, mostly just more thanks and hopes that she has fun on her last night in Canterlot. The big entrance doors began to slowly close on themselves; soon, with a gentle click, they closed themselves completely. Rarity turned around and gazed at the messy ballroom that was littered with balloons, streamers, confetti, and even a little bit of cake was splotched on the floors. Her mind was reeling with the events that had happened earlier, as well as how she had behaved and the decisions she made earlier. She chastised herself for not telling Twilight the truth in the first place instead of having to explain the whole ordeal afterward. It certainly would have made things easier to handle in the long run.

Rarity looked outside the windows at the fancy garden. The night had quickly drawn to a close and now there were only a few ponies left sauntering about the place, making small talk with each other.

It felt like a long time had passed since the whole incident with her friends disrupting the party occurred. It was still easy for Rarity to recall what had happened, most of which had involved a certain white stallion, whose actions continued to leave her mystified.

~//~ ~||~ ~\\~

"I, for one, find them charmingly rustic."

Jet Set and Upper Crust's eyes went wide as their haughty laughter abruptly dimmed at the sound of Fancypants' unexpected remark; it was coupled with the sound of a collective gasp of surprise that came from the group of party guests, including Rarity, the most surprised of them all.

"And I think the dress you made for your friend is lovely," Fancypants commented. A worried and dumbfounded look formed on Rarity's face, but was soon replaced by one of relief and happiness as the white stallion quickly continued his statement. "Mmm-hmm, I daresay every mare in Canterlot will be wanting one."

"Oh, I'd like to place my order right NOW!" Upper Crust demanded, shoving her head into Rarity's personal space.

Her spouse Jet Set was quick to mimic her. "I think you should get two, hmm!" With a look of annoyance, Rarity swiftly moved out of where she stood, letting the couple's heads knock into each other.

"Er, yes, now then," uttered Fancypants as Rarity trotted next to him. "How about you introduce me to your friends?"

Rarity beamed. "With pleasure."

Fancypants lightly chuckled at the mare's joyful mood. Rarity’s head immediately turned as she tried to hide the faint amaranth color that began to appear on her face.

All of the party guests slowly went back to what they were all doing before the scene that had just taken place, trying to act as if nothing had happened. The band took to their instruments and began to serenade the party with calming classical music once again, ponies attempted to rekindle conversations that had been interrupted, and a group of partygoers went back to their game of croquet.

"Hmm," Fancypants mumbled. He turned toward the five ponies who stood out like a sore hoof, then surveyed his surroundings. "Perhaps it would be best if I were to make my acquaintance with you ladies someplace a bit more personal."

The five ponies and Rarity glanced around to see that they were right in the middle of the garden, where everypony could observe them.

"I absolutely agree," Rarity stated. "Let's see, why don't we go over to that--"

"I say, what is it that is going on inside the Canterlot ballroom?"

Rarity stood flustered. "Well, um, that was for my dear friend Twilight Sparkle, you see, because it's her birthday--"

"Oh, well that sounds like a much more exciting soirée than this one."

"You're telling me," Pinkie Pie said. "Everypony here is soooooo boring!"

With that statement, Rarity's friends began to talk simultaneously, their sentences becoming jumbled and mixed up with one another. Fancypants laughed silently to himself, and the white mare sighed in contentment; she could tell that it would be a great evening after all.

~//~ ~||~ ~\\~

The fact that an important and high-class stallion stepped in and, not necessarily defended, but supported her friends who, in the eyes of all the ponies at the garden party, were merely peasants, common folk ponies with nothing of value boggled her mind. It was one of the most gentlecoltly acts she had witnessed and experienced in quite some time.

The sound of laughter pushed Rarity out of her stupor.

"Oh Rarity, your friends are simply wonderful!" Fancypants remarked as he sauntered over towards the white mare. Rarity turned and faced the white stallion.

"Yes indeed," she responded. "They may not be the most...elegant ponies ever, but I am still incredibly thankful for them."

"Yes," Fancypants uttered. "I can only imagine..."

Rarity took note of the stallion's slightly despondent tone of voice as it faded away. She gave a curious glance at him; he was levitating a glass of punch and was gently sipping from it. The mare found that his facial features, albeit subtly, looked despondent as well.

"Pardon me if I'm being intrusive, Fancypants," Rarity began. "But you look somewhat down. Is there anything wrong?"

Fancypants snapped out of his trance, and faced his questioner. "Oh, it's nothing..."

Rarity stared at him, unconvinced that he was telling the truth. "Are you sure?"

Fancypants gave an extended sigh and looked down at his hooves. "I may have party guests that I mingle with...but I can't say that I have any real platonic relationship with anypony."

"Oh," Rarity mumbled.

"Other than Fleur de Lis, I don't really interact with anypony on a more...shall I say 'intimate' level."

"Who?"

"My fiancée. The mare I was with when you bumped into me a week or so ago."

Rarity blushed and lowered her head slightly. "Oh, right. Once again, I'd like to apologize for-"

"Ha, nonono, you don't have to apologize, it's quite alright. Like I said, you're most certainly a pony worth bumping into. And now that I've gotten to know you better, that statement is much truer than before."

Rarity's faint blush was getting more difficult to hide; as a result, she turned away once again and shifted her head so that her mane shrouded a portion of her face. "Gee, Fancypants, you're such a flatterer."

Fancypants chortled lightly. "I've been told that on numerous occasions. I suppose it comes naturally."

The white mare felt the heat in her cheeks begin to die down, so she lifted up her head once more and regained a more natural pose.

"I have a question to ask, Rarity." Fancypants said unexpectedly.

"Oh," Rarity replied, confused. "And what would that be?"

Fancypants paused briefly before he asked his question. "Why didn't you just tell me you were from Ponyville in the first place?"

Rarity froze up as an awkward and uncomfortable tension filled up the air. Seconds went by, but they made the uncomfortable silence unbearable. Once again, she mentally punished herself for not being truthful in the first place.

"...I'm sorry," Rarity murmured.

"It's okay, I understand," Fancypants muttered in response. "I acted the same way when I first met Fleur de Lis. It's easier to lie when you want to make a good impression than it is to be honest."

His words did little to comfort or reassure Rarity, so she simply gave a soft sigh. The silence grew, but this time there was no uncomfortable sensation. It was a nice and relaxing emptiness that lasted for approximately half a minute; of course it felt like half an hour to the both of them.

A question suddenly popped into Rarity's head, though. She cleared her throat, and spoke gently.

"How come I haven't seen her since I first met you?"

"She's not really one for parties or get-togethers," Fancypants replied. "She also likes having alone time every now and then. I'm happy she's a tolerating mare, though, since I'm the complete opposite. So, she basically lets me roam around whenever I want, telling me that she didn't mind just staying home and reading a book or something."

"I see." Rarity whispered.

"Speaking of Fleur," Fancypants started. "It's getting awfully late, and, even though she doesn't mind me staying out later than most, I begin to miss her enormously after a while. I hope you don't mind."

"Of course not, darling," Rarity assured Fancypants, giving him a smile. "I completely understand. I should be heading back to my suite as well anyway. Got to get up early and make my way back to good ol' Ponyville."

Fancypants tried to hide the disappointment he was feeling, but a little still managed to appear on his facial expression, which Rarity noticed. "Well then," Fancypants said, putting on a somewhat stilted smile, "I had an absolutely marvelous evening tonight, Rarity. I hope to see you here in Canterlot someday soon again."

A faint blue light began to shine around the doors as she used her magic to open them up and depart the building. "As do I," the mare replied, trotting out of the room. "Goodbye, Fancypants!"

The stallion inexplicably hesitated to get his response out, but soon raised his hoof and began to wave at the exiting pony ahead. "So long, miss Rarity!"

Creaking noises echoed about the ballroom as the big doors slowly began to shut. Within a few moments, they were closed, and Rarity was out of sight. Fancypants just stood where he was, feeling melancholic. When he felt something on his cheek, he lifted up his hoof and rubbed it to see what it was.

It was a teardrop.

~//~ ~||~ ~\\~

Gazing up, he hoped he could catch a glimpse of Princess Luna's beautiful night; much to his dismay, however, all the lights from the various high-rises and lamp posts prevented him from seeing anything. A slow and solemn sigh was exhaled, and he continued to amble down the street. At this point, all he was concerned about was getting back to his place and falling asleep with his fiancée. He had left the party soon after Rarity did and listlessly walked home for five hours—or so it seemed. In actuality, it was only around fifteen minutes or so.

Luckily he didn't need to wait much longer; he realized that he had made it to his apartment. He levitated his keys, unlocked the entrance door, and walked in and up the flight of stairs all in a rather perfunctory manner. His room was on the top level, level six, but he liked to exercise every now and then. He wanted to stay in shape for his fiancée, who would frequently tell him that she wanted him to become thinner.

If there was one thing Fancypants had learned during his lifetime, it was that time moved awfully slowly when you're in a depressed mood. The way he was feeling at the moment reminded him of when he was a very young colt. Growing up on a beet farm outside of Foaledo, Ohayo, life had been incredibly boring. On top of that, he had been an only child and never had anypony to play with, and all he had for entertainment were different novels and books. While reading prolifically helped nurture and feed his intelligence, it certainly wasn't a ton of fun all the time.

He began to reminisce about the times when he would flip through pages of atlases, maps, and reference books, where he first discovered that there was more than just dull, rural life. All the colorful pictures of big cities such as Manehattan, Los Dressageles, Chicacolt, Boronco, and Canterlot dazzled him extremely. There was nothing that he wanted more when he was a child than to go to one of those bustling cities.

His dreams would come true, albeit in a very bittersweet way. After a carriage accident, Fancypants had moved to Canterlot with his aunt and uncle. It was everything he had hoped for; bright lights, active environment, high-class luxuries, and many more. After his grievance over the death of his parents was done, he was pretty much beaming with joy every day.

This could be why he had an infatuation with Rarity, because of the similarities in feelings. He could empathize with pretending to be fancy and proper when you're really from an unknown town. Either way, he wasn't sure why he had such strong feelings towards a mare that he had met only a week ago. Still didn't take away from the fact that he couldn't get her out of his mind.

He finally reached the front door of his room, which he realized was slightly open. Though he found this to be odd, he brushed it off, thinking that Fleur de Lis had just forgotten. With his nose, he pushed the door open slowly and walked across the threshold. Not surprisingly, all the lights were off and everything was quiet. So quiet that he was able to hear his fiancée talking in the master bedroom.

"...won't be back for a while, so don't fret."

Fancypants lightly trotted over to the bedroom door, thinking that she may just be talking in her sleep.

"If you say so."

Fancypants froze. That was certainly not his fiancée's sweet voice. No, it sounded masculine. He began to panic slightly as he broke out into a gallop and crashed through the door.

Fleur de Lis shrieked, then shook her head in disbelief. "FANCYPANTS?!"

He wasn't paying attention, though; he just stared at the stallion that had his hoof wrapped around Fleur's waist.

Chapter II

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All the stress that piled up from what had transpired earlier that evening began to make itself present as a fatigued Rarity lethargically climbed up the pristine white staircase that lead to her suite. Her muscles were sore from dancing, her eyelids heavy, longing for the comforting euphoria of sleep, and a strong headache was encompassing her entire skull; a pulsating sensation behind her eyeballs, a tight stiffness in the back of her neck, and a rippling pain on the crown of her head.

It came as a relief when the staircase made its final turn and the large wooden bedroom doors came into view. With a flash of deep purple and white, she teleported herself into her room, saving herself from trotting up thirty or forty more steps.

"RAAAAAAEEERRR!"

Opalescence voiced her irritation from the corner of the room, where Rarity saw she was next to an empty food bowl.

"Oh, Opal," Rarity cooed, levitating a bag of food over to the bowl. "I'm incredibly sorry for how late I am. The party went on longer than I thought it would."

Her white feline pet only grumbled under her breath, eating her food as soon as it was served. The mare slowly strolled over to her bed, removing her chapeau and putting on the end table. Her eyes glanced down at the waste basket beside it that held the design for what was supposed to really be Twilight's dress, examining all the pencil strokes and elegant curlicues she drew. It made her feel guilty again; she had gotten so carried away with everything in Canterlot that it turned what could have been a marvelous creation into something dull and drab. But she had cleared everything up with her lavender pal, and, to her relief, she was forgiven and all was water under the bridge now. After all, her studious friend really couldn't care less about her appearance. So, without further hesitation, she collapsed on top of the soft blankets and rested her head on the plush pillows.

She would be lying if she said she wasn't going to miss Canterlot. The grand Capitol of Equestria truly seemed like her home, her niche, the place she should be living in. All of the sophistication, the fashion, the glamour, the high-class lifestyle—it all complemented her personality to a tee. Everything there was perfect.

If there was thing she would change about it all, however, it would be most of the ponies attitude. Most of them spoke with at least a hint of narcissism. It would easily and quickly get on her nerves, but Rarity went out of her way to make sure she didn't mention anything. And if they were not interested in you, or what you had to say, they would stand aloof and continue to talk with other ponies around them.

As always, though, there were exceptions. Pish Posh and Swan Dive were both very amiable. Tutti Frutti was a real gentlestallion as well. Even Upper Crust wasn't so terrible, although her spouse Jet Set was another story. One particular exception, however, captivated Rarity from the very beginning--Fancypants

A soft sigh was released. Fancypants was everything Rarity wanted in a stallion. He was kind, sweet, charming, and very refined. Unlike most of the high-class ponies, he wasn't snobby or snooty. Even after he found out that she was just a small town filly, he never made a disparaging comment or remark. In her eyes, he was absolutely wonderful, not to mention stunning piece of eye candy. His gorgeous blue mane and tail went so well with his snow white coat, identical to her own. And his horn; what a large one it was! Rarity often wondered if it had any correlation with something else about him.

Suddenly, she noticed a dampness in between her hind legs, making the sheet on the bed become slightly moist. Her face began to flush with embarrassment, despite the fact that she was in the private confines of her suite with no one but Opal. The night had been tiring and made her feel fatigued, and she would normally never partake in an activity so lurid and crude. Tonight, however, she was feeling different. It was her final vacation night in the grandest city in all the land. Not to mention, she could use some relief from all the stress. A small, coy little smirk curled on Rarity's lips.

Buck it. Why not?

~//~ ~||~ ~\\~

Right around the moment Rarity was making herself comfortable in bed, time stood still for Fancypants. His mind was completely empty and deserted of all thoughts while his feelings were ambivalent. He was not sure whether to be furious and enraged or broken and depressed. Eventually, the two emotions merged together and became a swirling and curling concoction. However, none of those emotions displayed themselves, but, rather, kept themselves hidden behind his stolid, well constructed facade.

A gentle breeze flew in from the slightly open window. So his thunderstruck stupor started fading away bit by bit, bringing him back into reality. It wasn't long afterward that more shock was thrown at him, though.

"Jet Set," he uttered. His tone of voice made it difficult to decipher whether it was a question or just an obvious statement.

A look of fear and guilt made its way onto Jet Set's muzzle, which he unsuccessfully tried to hide. Swallowing hard, he hastily spoke to the white stallion at the bedroom threshold.

"Fancypants, why hello! I, um, I didn't know, umm...You see, I was just, erm..."

He was unable to put together a full sentence; the rest of his comment ended up becoming a bunch of incoherent babbling spat out in apprehension. Fleur de Lis, who looked a little less worried, cleared her throat and picked up on where Jet Set had left off.

"I wasn't expecting you to be home so early," she stated, being more composed and collected than her stuttering companion.

Fancypants disregarded his fiancée's words, his attention focused on Jet Set. He wanted to levitate the stallion with his magic and defenestrate him out the bedroom window with a burning passion, but he took deep breaths and kept his cool.

"Jet Set," he began, speaking softly. "...Jet Set...You're married..."

All efforts of hiding his penitence and fear were abandoned when Fancypants made that remark. Fleur de Lis was just about ready to break down as well, but she continued to wear her calm masquerade.

"Listen honey, I'm so—"

"Don't call me honey." Fancypants firmly interrupted. Fleur de Lis gulped in fear.

"Fancypants, please," Jet Set begged. "I know I've done wrong, but please, whatever you do, don't tell Upper Crust; my life would be ruined if she were to find out about this, and-"

"Maybe you should have thought about that in the first place," Fancypants berated, still keeping his volume in check and his anger under control.

"I know, I understand completely," Jet Set replied nervously. "But I'll do anything to have you keep this a secret, give you whatever you want! Bits, possessions, whatever!"

"And please don't be mad at me," Fleur de Lis beseeched. "Like Jet Set said, I'll give you—WE'LL give you anything. If it makes you feel any better, and if Jet Set isn't opposed to it, I don't mind letting you...You know...Join us."

She gave a sheepish grin and waited for the response.

But that was it for him. Fancypants had dealt with more than enough. He didn't want to associate with his perfidious lover in any way, shape, or form anymore. His head slowly lowered, the big, oblong horn pointing at the two.

"...Buck off..." he whispered. With that came silence; Fancypants would not have known if the two kept the plethora of apologies going, though, for he immediately turned around and galloped out of the room, slamming the bedroom door with his magic.

He stopped in his tracks as he was escaping when he passed a framed photo of him and his cheating fiancée, pausing to stare at it. They were standing in front of a large fountain--one that resides in a popular plaza in Canterlot--and they had the hugest smiles on their faces. Fleur de Lis was striking a coy, supermodel-like pose. Her lissome body arched up over Fancypants, forehooves on his back with her chin resting on them. He remembered when this was taken; right after he had proposed to her.

With a silent but furious scowl, he impetuously used his magic to pick up and whip the framed photograph across the living room. CRACK! It made impact with the wall next to the bedroom door, causing both a startled squeak from inside the room and a decent sized crater. Shattered glass flew about as the frame fell to the floor and broke into pieces.

With that, he opened the front door, and went back to fleeing the building. As he trotted to the elevator, his hoof pounded the down arrow. The silence in the halls made his action reverberate loudly, along with everything else he did. His heavy breathing seemed to have an abnormally high volume because of the quiet. He knew it was late and that he was making quite a ruckus, but that was the least of his problems at the moment.

His left fore-hoof began tapping the carpeted floor lightly out of impatience and annoyance.

Tap tap tap tap tap tap—

Ding!

The elevator doors finally opened up, which elicited a sigh from Fancypants as he furiously sauntered in, pounding the ground floor button. Then, without hesitation, he plopped onto his haunches and buried his face his hooves.

The slow elevator took half a minute to go from the top floor to the ground level, yet so many thoughts flowed and surged through the stallion's mind within that amount of time. He wanted this mess to all turn out to be a very realistic dream.

The one thing that made this situation worse, Fancypants soon realized, was that he was on his own; he had no one to confide in. Sure he was admired by plenty of ponies, but he never felt a close relationship with anypony. And though it is true that he was, in colloquial vernacular, a "mare magnet", none of his previous mistresses other than Fleur de Lis were ever genuinely interested in him. In fact, nopony was ever really genuinely interested in him; every conversation at every soirée was filled with mindless, superficial, and palaver blabber. The only pony who really took a deep interest in him was...

Before he knew it, a light ding signaled that he had reached the bottom. So he got back up on all fours, his legs inexplicably feeling fatigued and languid. At the moment, however, his mind was too apathetic, and his soul too nihilistic to care.

The doors opened themselves, and they revealed a young adult pony couple giggling and laughing. The stallion—ultramarine coat with a tangerine mane and tail with a quill as a cutie mark—had heavy eyes and was swaying vertiginously. The mare—phlox coat with an almost identical mane of lush plum, her cutie mark being a strawberry and a bunch of grapes—had her hoof wrapped around the other, chuckling uncontrollably in a tiny, giddy voice.

Despite the fact that they were heavily inebriated, their laughter subsided momentarily when they saw Fancypants trotting out wearing a discreet yet strong look of anger and sadness.

Their eyes pierced Fancypants, but he brushed them off and continued to walk lifelessly. Soon enough, the couple began their little giggling fit once again, having a little difficulty with which button to push.

Their slap-happy laughter was infectious; it began to ring about inside of Fancypants' mind even after the elevator door had closed. They were probably having the night of their lives, living with reckless, youthful abandon. And here was Fancypants, who felt the lowest he had felt in a very long while; and though he wasn't very old, he certainly was past his prime.

He strolled outside into the damp night air. It was drizzling slightly, microscopic drops of precipitation landing on Fancypants' body. It was the least of his worries, though; his main concern at that moment was where his life was leading him, as well as critically analyzing the one he currently had and finding out if it was truly what he wanted. If he wasn't going through a mid-life crisis earlier this evening, he definitely began to feel one about to began, thanks to this disappointing and heartbreaking discovery.

So he slowly walked on down the dimly lit boulevard, ready for a long and lonely night ahead of him.

~//~ ~||~ ~\\~

Rarity and Princess Celestia helped the poor teenage bell colt with all of the white mare's luggage, but even with the help, the gray pony had a bunch to haul down. It were times like these where he wished he paid more attention in magic class so he could just levitate heavy items instead of having his back go through harsh pain.

Thankfully for him, they finally reached the ground outside the hotel lobby (to ensure Celestia's privacy), and Rarity grabbed all of the items he and the princess were carrying with her magic. So with a bow to the ruler of Equestria, he sprinted his way back to the hotel lobby.

Rarity looked up at the princess and smiled. "I cannot thank you enough for this, Princess Celestia. It meant so much to me!"

"It was nothing, my little pony. You're always welcome anytime here in Canterlot. Have a safe trip back to Ponyville now." she replied, her smooth matriarch tone of voice soothing Rarity. Before she could object to her statement of what she had done for her was "nothing", Celestia teleported out of view, leaving her standing on the sidewalk by herself.

It was raining a little bit, and her hooves were killing her from all the walking down the stairs, so she hailed a cab to pick her up and leave her at the train station. It turned out that it wasn't that far away from where she had stayed at, but she didn't dwell on that too much. She just bought her train ticket and proceeded to wait for her ride.

She set her bags down on a concrete bench that sat in the shade. This got Opalescence irritated as she started to shake and jostle about inside her pet carrier.

"Oh, Opal, sorry you've been cooped up in there for this whole time." apologized Rarity, opening the pet carrier to let her cat out and stretch. Opalescence hissed at her, and went on over to the other side of the bench. Soon, however, she leapt out of sight behind a wall, chasing after something.

Rarity stood up and ran around the corner in shock. "Opal, come back here right now! I said—"

Opalescence continued running after what Rarity found out to be a squirrel, but that wasn't what caused her to stop. A few yards ahead of her, the large body of a stallion, who was lying unconsciously on the ground only moments earlier, stirred up from a deep slumber as a result of Opal running over him. He wore a black suit, but that was all; the rest of his white body and blue mane and tail was visible to her, along with the cutie mark of three small crowns studded with a purple diamond on each.

Rarity knew immediately who it was, but was so perplexed and curious that she didn't think what she was seeing was real. So she swallowed gently, and uttered out a single question.

"...Fa...Fancypants...?"