The Broken Mare

by Brumby_Run

First published

Derpy must face up to the events of her past she can no longer remember, with the aid of Celestia.

Derpy has been summoned to Canterlot by Princess Celestia. She has been fitted with the ceremonial armour of the Royal Guard, and has been brought to a courthouse. The princess has asked her to speak of an event in her past that she has no memory of. An event that changed her life and altered her personality. She just has to keep reminding herself that "most days are pretty good."

An unexpected summons

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Walking through Canterlot made Derpy nervous. It didn’t matter that she knew why, or that the related circumstances were very unlikely to arise again, the feeling continued to gnaw at her. She resisted the urge to quicken her pace, as her destination lay no more than a block ahead. Focusing on the sturdy gates in front of her, she trotted forth. She was, however, still confused about why she was summoned.

“Reservist Derpy Hooves reporting,” she informed the guards.

“Orders?” The white unicorn’s asked in a bored tone.

Derpy twisted her head back, plucking the envelope from where it was tucked underneath her wing. The grey pegasus felt the tug of magic, and the letter slipped from her teeth. The guard opened the parchment, and compared its contents to a ledger set before him. With a grunt of assent, his aura was concentrated on the iron gates. They opened, just wide enough to admit the mare.

“Your appointment is with the Master-at-Arms, do you know where his office is?”

“Would it be in the Armoury?” Derpy asked. “Do I just follow the signs?”

The stallion nodded his confirmation to her queries, and returned his attention back to the street. Taking this as a dismissal, she walked forward, still none the wiser. The signs clearly pointed out the direction to the Armoury, it was a short walk through the parade grounds. The young stallion behind the desk directed her to an office down the hall.

It was a nice office, all things considered. The walls were painted a quiet beige. Despite its small size, the desk dominated the room. The varnish of the work surface had suffered coffee stains, and was worn thin in places, but the paperwork was stacked in neat piles. There was no clutter, the only personal touch was a foals’ artwork, pinned to a corkboard on the side wall. It was a cosy space. It would be hard to imagine that it lay at the heart of Equestria’s military stronghold.

“Miss Hooves, sorry to keep you waiting. I’ll do my best to answer any questions you may have.” The stallion that entered the room was large and muscular. His coat was a cream colour, with a pale blue mane and tail. The mark on his flank was of two crossed swords.

“Why was my reserve status activated? It was a special arrangement, because of an irregularity with my discharge...”

“Yes, I have read your file.” Derpy blushed. “You can relax, you’re not going into active duty. You are here at the personal request of Princess Celestia. I have been instructed to fit you with the ceremonial armour, and deliver you to her private chambers.”

“I was a bareback, I’ve never worn the iron...” Derpy covered her mouth at the faux pas, using the nicknames the troops had for each other in front of an officer.

“Yes, I am aware you were an invisible guard,” he replied with a sly smile on his face, stressing the correct terminology. “But today you get to join the ranks of the ceremonial guard.” He gave a quick wink. “You may even enjoy your time as an ironback.”

“What will my duties be?” She queried. “How long will this take? I’ll have to make arrangements for my daughter if I’m going to be here more than the one day.”

“The princess will give you your exact instructions, but you should be able to catch this afternoon’s return train to Ponyville. You should be home by evening. Shall we get you fitted out now?”

Derpy felt reassured, but not exactly enlightened.

-----

“It’s good to see you again, Derpy. The armour suits you.”

Princess Celestia had dismissed the Master-at-Arms, and was addressing Derpy in her private chambers. It was a rather modest room. Large cushions were scattered about the floor for comfort. There were several bookcases, their shelves weighed down with several centuries worth of nick-nacks and mementos. A small writing desk, scattered with parchment, sat tucked in a corner. The left side of its top was a mess of wax drippings, white droplets from candles and red from the residue of the Royal Seal.

The royal Alicorn herself stood by the window. Her pure white coat was radiant in the early morning sun. The jewels in her tiara and yoke glinted in the light, drawing Derpy’s eye away from the mystery of the goddesses wafting mane and tail. Celestia’s serene smile did its best to calm Derpy’s nerves, and her eyes were bright with joy.

“Princess, why have you summoned me?”

Celestia’s mood darkened. It was as if the question had caused a cloud to cross in front of the sun. While nothing about the Alicorn appeared different, her whole visage seemed to dim.

“The three ponies that were responsible for your injuries during the Canterlot riots have applied for parole. They are having their hearing this morning. I would like for you to give a victim’s statement to the parole board. I hope it will help them to make the best possible decision.”

“I still don’t remember anything of that day,” Derpy replied in a small voice. “The doctors tell me that I will probably never remember. I don’t know what I should say.”

“You can say whatever you would like. There are no rules you have to follow. Talk about what your life is like now, how your injuries have affected you. Nopony will be permitted to interrupt you, or ask you questions. You can speak for as long as you like. Just try to make them understand how you have been affected, as best as you can.”

“Why do you want me wearing the ceremonial armour?”

“You and Valiant Charge were on duty as guards, my guard. I want these ponies to know that they attacked two of my royal guards. I want them to see you standing before them in the uniform. I want everypony in that room to remember that those three killed one of my royal guards. I am not permitted to interfere with the courts, or parole hearings, but I can do this small thing to ‘stack the deck’ as it were. In fact...” The princesses horn glowed, and an eyepatch coalesced between the two. “...it might be better if you wore this as well.”

“But I like my glass eye. You made it for me. It is one of the few things I can remember from that time.”

“I do not wish to upset you,” the princess was touched by Derpy’s outburst. “but I do think it would have more impact.”

Derpy stood there for a moment, looking at the hovering eyepatch. With a tiny sigh, she ducked her head and pulled off the helmet with a foreleg.

“If you think it’s best, princess.”

The eyepatch was floated over, and cinched tight over the pegasus’s head. The princess stood back to admire her work, but was interrupted by a hesitant voice.

“It’s the left eye that is the false one...”

“Oops, silly me.”

-----

The parole board had convened in one of the underused criminal courtrooms. Built of marble and granite, with furniture of aged and polished hardwood, it conveyed the weight of centuries of justice. The air was unpleasantly cool and sterile. Both Celestia and Luna took seats where the judge would normally be. An ancient formality, unusual in that the sisters almost never observed such hearings. The parole board, four distinguished ponies from a legal background, sat beneath the royal sisters, files and paperwork scattered on the bench in front of them. On the left side of the court were the two advocate tables, one side arguing for release, the other for the continuation of the sentence. On the right was the docks, where the prisoners sat with their guards. The open space between the docks and advocate tables is where ponies made their speeches and arguments.

Derpy paid no attention to the proceedings before her. She let her attention drift between the three stallions in the docks, and the Princess of the Sun. She hoped, desperately, for a spark of memory, some way to recover what she had lost. It had been nearly ten years, however, and was highly unlikely that anything of that day would return.

“The state of Equestria calls on Derpy Hooves to make a victim’s statement. Derpy Hooves, step forward and be recognised.”

The formal call shocked Derpy out of her reverie. She stood and walked to the center of the courtroom. The click of her shod hooves, and clink of the unfamiliar armour were the only sounds in the room. She gave a curt nod of respect to the princesses, and scanned the parole board, her gaze not actually registering any details. She turned to face the prisoners in the dock, giving them a blank stare.

“I don’t care what you do with these ponies,” her voice was flat. ”The dead don’t get to care about what happens to the living.”

There was a confused silence. Derpy could feel the questioning looks, the raised eyebrows. She waited a moment before continuing, to give her statement time to sink in.

“‘Derpy Hooves’ died that day. Much the same way that Valiant Charge did. She was beaten to death, trying to prevent the Princess of the Sun from being ambushed by a political protest turned violent. I may have inherited her body and name, but I am not that mare.”

She turned to face the advocates tables before continuing.

“I’ve been told what happened. What ‘I’ did. How I had seen that the princess was cut off from the rest of her ceremonial guard by the protesters. How I had spotted the way she was being herded towards those three, and their weapons. How I had sent the unicorn Valiant Charge to collect reinforcements. How I landed between the princess and the rioters.” She hung her head, “They told me of the beating I took, to spare the princess, and how it bought time for the reinforcements to arrive.”

“I remember none of it. I can’t even imagine doing something like that.”

She advanced on the parole board, her steps nervous.

“When you beat any living creature about the head, there is always the risk of brain damage. There is always a chance that the injuries inflicted will be permanent. I lost my left eye, almost all of my memories, and suffered a pretty severe personality change. I am not the ‘Derpy Hooves’ of that day, and I never will be again.”

“I was very lucky not to lose my daughter. I didn’t know I was pregnant when I reported for duty that morning.”

Her cheeks blushed with shame as she continued.

“Valiant Charge was not just my partner, he was also my lover. I had to learn that by reading my diary. We broke the rules so we could be together. Frat...Fraternisation, it’s called,” she stammered. “We must have been in love. Why else would we risk our careers?”

“I can’t remember him!” she cried out, shouting to the ceiling. "We were in love, hiding our relationship from our superiors and friends. Sneaking about in order to steal time together. I fell pregnant to him, and now I can’t even picture his face!” Her voice cracked. “A mare should remember the act of love that gave her a child. At the very least she should remember the face of the stallion she was with. It’s gone, all gone.”

Derpy turned, and faced the three ponies in the docks. She couldn’t look them in the eye, so she just hung her head and addressed the floor.

“You beat it all out of me. I remember almost nothing of my life before waking in the hospital. My parents are strangers to me. I have managed to build a relationship with them, but the emotional connection is not there. It’s weird, I can recite my times tables, but I can’t recall the face of the teacher that taught them to me. I know I went to flight school, but I can’t recognize any of my classmates. The diaries I wrote read like fiction to me. It's as if it was all about somepony else. All that is left of my life before the beating are fragments of memory, with no context to help my understand.”

“You killed me. I am a ghost, a shell of the mare I was.”

Derpy threw her head back, and shouted at the ponies in the docks, "What was it all for? What did you hope to achieve by taking up arms against Princess Celestia?”

“Does your little political movement even exist any more?!” she bellowed.

The grey pegasus fixed her gaze on each of the prisoners in turn. She tried to read their expressions. She searched their faces for answers. She kept at it, until she realized that they were embarrassed. All three of them wore expressions that were positively sheepish.

She couldn’t help herself, Derpy broke into a fit of laughter. It was a terrible sound. There was no humor behind it, save that of the gallows. It was the laughter of the dead. The laughter of pain, suffering and frustration. She felt no relief from it, and managed to choke it off with a sob. She fought the tears that were welling behind her eye.

“It was all for nothing, wasn’t it?”

She stood before everypony present, her head hung so low that her helmet threatened to scrape the floor. Her body looked like it was weighed down by the armour she wore. Defeat radiated from her. She looked like a broken mare in a cheap tin suit.

No,” she berated herself silently, the words bouncing around her head like the one drill-sergeant she could remember, “You’re wearing the armour of the Royal Guard. Act like you deserve it!” Shame pulled her back from the brink.

Derpy started to pull herself together. She adjusted her posture, straightening her legs and arching her back. She gave her tail a flick, holding it high. She drew her neck back, and pulled her head up, holding it proud. Snapping her wings open and forward, she became the image of a Royal Guard. The picture was only spoiled by the eyepatch over her left eye, and the rage that boiled behind the right one.

“Stay away from Ponyville.”

She took a pace toward the docks. The crack of her shoes against the tile floor sounded like a rifle shot. Even the two princesses flinched.

“There is nothing you can do for me. No possible way for you to make amends.” Another pace forward, and everypony in the room twitched at the sound. “I have no forgiveness for you. Forgiveness is a luxury the dead are not permitted.” She grinned at that, it was a threatening gesture. “I will not permit my friends, myself, or my daughter, to be hurt by you. Don’t you dare set hoof within fifty miles of my home. There is really very little for a brain-damaged mare like me to lose.”

The three ponies in the docks cowered before her. The scourge of the Canterlot riots, frightened of her, the broken mare. The mare they had broken, no less. Derpy almost broke into another fit of laughter. Instead, she gave one derisive snort.

“Stay away from Ponyville,” she growled, threateningly.

Derpy turned her back to the three prisoners. She let her gaze wander around the room, never quite settling anywhere. The public gallery was filled with ponies she didn’t recognise. The two advocates and the parole board didn’t mean anything to her. Only Princess Celestia, who had been with her every step of her recovery, and Princess Luna, who she had met last Nightmare Night, held any place in her heart.

“I don’t care what you do with them. Just keep them away from me.”

With that, she turned and walked to the back of the room. She folded and parked her wings at her side, before pushing the grand doors of the courtroom open. Somepony called her name, calling for her to wait, but it wasn’t either of the princesses, so she stepped across the threshold without even looking back. As such, she missed every single guard in the room snapping to attention, and offering her a salute. Instead, she let the doors drift shut silently behind her.

-----

Derpy couldn't remember how she got back to the barracks. An automatic pilot she didn't know she had walked her to the Royal Guard's mess hall, and she was now seated alone at a table with a tray of food in front of her. She idly pushed the food around her plate, trying to calm her mind's turmoil. She wasn't hungry, and couldn't imagine why she took a tray. The force of a habit she could no longer remember.

The mess hall was quiet. Unusually quiet. It had not been anywhere near as quiet when she came in. Derpy looked up, straight into the eyes of the princess. Panic gripped her. She snapped off a salute, and tried to stand at attention. The stool she was sitting on had other ideas, however, and tangled her hind legs, crashing her down on the floor. With a cry of frustration, she found her footing, and managed to get upright. When she was sure she was stable, she tried the salute again. The clang of hoof against helmet rung through the hall.

"At ease," the princess called to the room. The stomp of hooves against the floor as the guards in the hall took up a relaxed stance was deafening.

"As you were," Celestia's melodious voice filled the room. Stools were scraped across the floor, and the clink of cutlery against crockery resumed. The mess hall was as close to normal as it could be with the goddess of the sun present.

"That means you too, Derpy."

The startled pegasus blinked several times before she permitted herself to relax and lower he hoof from her forehead. Silently cursing the stool that had tripped her up, she looked back down to her plate. Still not inspired to eat, she resumed playing with her food. After a few quiet moments, she started speaking just for the sake of conversation, trying to ignore exactly who she was speaking to.

"Most days are pretty good. My daughter is a wonderful filly that keeps me so busy. With my mail route to fill my time, and the friendly ponies of Ponyville, most days are pretty good. I really can't complain about my life. A lot of ponies are in much worse situations than I am."

With a slow blink, her rambling thoughts continued to spill out.

"Some days aren't so great." A scowl crossed her face. "There are times when some ponies use my name as another word for 'stupid.' Either they think I can't hear them, or they just don't care if what they say hurts. There are also times when I'm clumsy, and I break things. My balance isn't so great, thanks to the head injury. Something is messed up with my control of my weather magic too. I just can’t seem to get it right. I got zapped by lightning when I was trying to make a thunderhead rain. Do you know how difficult it can be for a pegasus that can’t be trusted to help out the weather teams?” She gave a heavy sigh before continuing. “Or when I’m in estrus, and I just want a stallion to rut my brains out..."

Too late, Derpy remembered who she was talking to. Protocol stated that you didn't discuss sex with royalty. You weren't even supposed to think about sex in the presence of the princesses. Derpy took a mouthful of whatever her fork was dipped in, to cover her embarrassment. When the taste hit her, she couldn't help but pull a face. All the fresh produce around Ponyville had ruined guard rations for her. She pushed the plate aside, and lay her head on the table.

"The kind of stallions that are interested in a brain-damaged mare aren't usually the nicest of ponies." She took a hesitant breath, remembering her last liaison. "I don't even have the memories of my time with Valiant to..." If you weren't supposed to think of sex in the presence of the Royal Alicorns, discussing masturbation must surely be a topic too far. She blushed so hard, she could hear the blood rushing to her face.

"On the bad days, I just have to keep telling myself that most days are pretty good." She let out a long slow breath. Closing her eye, she whispered to herself, "Most days are pretty good."

"I'm sorry I couldn't make today one of the good days," there was a tinge of regret in the Alicorn's voice. "But I hope you understand why it was so important that you came today. Ponies forget. Today, the Canterlot riots are remembered as an irritation, if they are thought of at all. So few even think of the sacrifice that you and Valiant Charge made for my safety. Even members of my guard don't even blink when they pass the memorial plaque on the parade ground." The princess bowed her head, as if carrying the weight of the world.

"I remember. I remember everything."

The mess grew cold, it looked darker too. It was only just past midday, but it felt like dusk. The princess looked so somber.

"I remember every pony that has sacrificed themselves for me. No matter how small, I remember. I have accumulated debts that I can never hope to repay. At times, the weight on my soul is crushing."

Derpy didn't know what to say. She desperately wanted to offer some form of comfort, but what could she offer a goddess? She stretched out her wing, and gently brushed Celestia's cheek. She felt, rather than saw, the tear that smeared against her feather tip.

The silence stretched between them. After a time, the princess gestured towards the door. Without a word between them, the goddess and the pegasus left the mess. Outside, Derpy turned left, while the princess aimed right.

"Where are you going Derpy?"

"To the Armoury, to return..." She gestured to the brass she wore, "..this."

"The armour is yours Derpy, to keep. Let me walk you to the station."

"But, what am I supposed to do with it?" the surprised mare asked.

"Whatever you want. I believe that some centuries ago it was quite the fashion for retired guards to display their armour in their homes. I do hope that you would wear it on Remembrance Day."

They walked on, not one member of the public giving them a second glance. Seeing the princess walking around Canterlot with a guard was not unusual. None suspected that it was the princess escorting the guard. As they arrived at the station, a phalanx fell into step behind the princess.

"There is one more thing, Derpy." Something started to coalesce between them. "You left this behind when you left the castle infirmary."

With great care, the goddess of the sun attached the medal to the breastplate Derpy was wearing. In a scene that shocked all present into a stunned silence, the princess bowed low enough that her chin nearly scrapped the ground.

"Derpy Hooves, for your services protecting the state of Equestria, and for the sacrifices made to protect the Goddess of the Sun, I present you with the Medal of Valour. May your example light the way for all who follow."

"Tha-th-thanks?" the blushing mare stuttered.

"And stop referring to yourself as 'brain-damaged.' You are suffering from a medical condition. Amnesia, it's called. You would do well to remember that. You might attract a better class of stallion. I know of a few that would consider the armour... Stimulating." The princess offered a sly wink, as she stood tall amongst the crowd.

Behind her, the phalanx stood at attention, and held their salute until the train Derpy boarded pulled out of the station.

-----

While the train ride home was embarrassing enough, the walk through Ponyville had Derpy believing that it might just be possible for a blush to prove terminal. Thankfully, the walk through town was short, and she was soon on the road to Sweet Apple Acres. The Apple family had been kind enough to offer to look after little Dinky, while she was in Canterlot. Applejack had mentioned that she might prove to be a calming influence on the wild antics of the "cutie-mark crusaders."

A gentle rap against the homestead door was enough to stir the household. Derpy could hear the distinctive drawl of Applejack over the hubbub of dinner.

"Come on in," she called out while pulling open the door, "Plenty of food for one... Whoa Nelly. Is that really you, Derpy?"

With a protracted sigh, the mail-mare responded, "Yeah, it's me. It's a long story, that I'm not sure I want to go into now. If Dinky is ready, we'll just head off."

"No can do, Sugarcube. You look like you need a big slice of pie, and a tankard of hard cider. Come on through to the kitchen," she offered. "But you might want to lose the eyepatch. It's kind of intimidating."

She left the helmet hanging on the coatrack by the door, and with nowhere else to put it, tucked the eyepatch into her breastplate. She walked through, the rattle of the armour uncomfortably loud. Predictably, conversation at the dinner table was silenced. Applejack moved to the counter to fix Derpy's pie and cider, fussing over the food and biting back on her curiousity. Macintosh fumbled with his cutlery, dropping the food from his fork onto the plate in front of him.

"Wow, Derpy stole a guard's uniform!" Scootaloo cried out.

"Now, I'm sure it aint like that," Applejack countered. "Just hush up, and let her speak."

There was only one pony in the room that Derpy had any interest in. And the pale lavender unicorn filly had a look of terror on her face. Her little Dinky looked scared out of her wits. Not surprisingly, as the ceremonial armour was designed to intimidate as much as protect.

"It's all right Dinky. The Princess gave me the uniform. It's kind of a gift. You see, before you were born, I was a guard for the Princess. Your father was too..."

And with that, she told the tale of the Derpy Hooves she could no longer remember.

A royal vigil

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Ten years earlier...

Princess Celestia strode into the Canterlot emergency room, an enraged goddess. The image of her was shocking to the ponies there. None of them had ever seen her without the royal tiara, or the yoke of office around her neck. Even her golden boots were missing, her bare hooves shod only with simple iron horseshoes. Her mane and tail were cinched back with a pair of basic elastics, but the ethereal colours continued to writhe, as if angered by their confinement. On top of this unprecedented display, there were rusty stains on her coat that anypony could spot as dried blood spatters. Unbridled rage flared behind her eyes, and no pony dared to meet her gaze. She advanced on the admissions desk.

"Two ponies were brought here from the riots. Where are they?" The princesses voice was dark and low, the sound of a mare on the edge of violence. The nurse at the desk jumped to answer.

"Can you describe their cutie-marks for me?"

"A pegasus mare with a group of seven bubbles, and a unicorn stallion with the constellation Virgo."

"Exam rooms 'A' and 'B'. they need to be stabilized before we send them up for surgery." The colour drained from the nurses face, as she recalled exactly how badly injured those two patients were.

"Through here?" It wasn't a question, the princess was walking back through the E. R. as if she owned it. Ponies fell over themselves to get out of her way.

"You can't go in there!" The nurse cried out, "Those are sterile rooms!" She raced from behind the desk in a vain attempt to head off the alicorn.

The examination rooms were large, glass fronted, medical rooms, opening up on a wide hallway. They had wide doors that could be pushed open from both sides with either a kick, or a gurney, and had their lower half reinforced with stainless steel. There were two rooms that were both a hive of activity. Medical ponies rushed about inside, shouting instructions at each other. Equipment was being passed around in a flurry of activity. The princess balked at the sight before her. She swung her gaze between the two rooms, uncertainty and fear on her face.

"Please Princess Celestia, you have to return to the waiting room."

"These two are members of my Royal Guard. Please inform the doctors that the Royal Infirmary is at their disposal, and I would like to request they be transferred there as soon as practical." Her voice sounded subdued, as she permitted herself to be led back to the waiting room. The request was a formality, for centuries the princess had made sure that every hospital in the land was provided with the best of everything.

The waiting room was crowded, and unusually quiet. Ponies pressed themselves against the walls in an attempt to give the princess some form of personal space. Two guards were posted at the entrance to the E. R. and another stood by the admissions desk, eyes focused on the crowd in the waiting room. Vigilance radiated from them, along with anger. Their eyes seemed to dare anypony present to make any kind of move they might disapprove of.

"Are you hurt, Princess?" A foal had broken away from his mother, and had squirmed up in front of the royal alicorn. He looked up, fearless, his voice and eyes full of concern.

"No child. I am alright. Some friends of mine were, however."

"Oh." the young colt brow furrowed. "Did the bad ponies hurt them?"

"Yes," The emotion of the moment caught Princess Celestia's voice, cracking it as she spoke with the foal. "They were hurt very badly. They were only trying to help me..."

"My daddy was hurt too. The bad ponies knocked him down, and tipped up our fruit cart in the markets."

"You were there?" the princess asked, her anger rising again.

"Yeah, but it's okay. I was able to grab the money pouch, and run to get help. The police ponies came to scare them off. Did you get the police ponies to help your friends?"

The innocent question was like a lance to Celestia's heart. "My friends are a kind of police pony." It was all she could choke out.

"Alfalfa, leave the Princess alone!" A middle aged mare squeezed forward through the press of bodies, her mane in disarray and fear in her voice. "I'm sorry, your Highness. I just.. We..." Her voice trailed off in confusion.

"It's quite alright. I never tire of the innocence of foals." Try as she might, the princess couldn't bring herself to smile. The mask she wore had cracked, and trepidation covered her face. "The child's father was injured?"

"My husband, yes. A broken foreleg. They are fitting a cast now. He should be completely healed before we can afford to replace the fruit cart." The worried mare couldn't hide the bitterness in her voice.

"The Royal kitchens are always looking for fresh produce. If you contact the castle secretary, he will be happy to make arrangements to collect an order from you." It was a small gesture, insignificant, in the scheme of things. Ponies responded best to these small, personal gestures. It was the nobles that demanded she move the sun and moon, just for them.

"Your majesty! I... We... Thank you!"

The duty nurse intruded on the scene, walking right to the royal alicorn, but unable to meet the princess's gaze. She had news, and Celestia could tell from across the room that is was not good.

"The unicorn stallion is going up for surgery. There is a complication with treating the pegasus mare." Her voice was low, Celestia could hear the the anger behind the flat statement. "She's pregnant, and many of the drugs we need to use are far too dangerous for her condition."

Princess Celestia reeled from the shock, as if she had been struck.

-----

Intensive care had a whole floor to itself. Despite the fact that it was nearly empty of patients, Princess Celestia still felt guilty for taking up a whole room for herself, and her staff. Guards and castle attendants came and went, passing information and paperwork back and forth. Just down the hall were the two injured guards. Machines beeping and hissing, measuring their life in a cold and impersonal way. Hospital staff made notes, administered treatments, and fussed over the two unconscious guards. Three lives hung in the balance, and all there was to do was wait. Celestia hated hospitals.

"Return to the castle, there are more than enough staff here to alert you of any change," the castle's secretary pleaded yet again.

"No."

"Think of your duties. We can not delay Court forever."

"Hang the Court."

"You have to open Parliament. The delays to government will be crippling."

"I am a figurehead. Parliament can function perfectly well without a pompous speech from me. Tell them to get to work."

"But, the traditions of our great land..."

"Curse our bloody traditions!" Celestia shouted. "I am not leaving until they wake."

The secretary gave up. There was no reasoning with the goddess of the sun when she spoke sacrilege about tradition. He turned his attention to the injured ponies before him. They looked completely unremarkable. A unicorn, and a pegasus, they hadn't even been wearing the ceremonial armour.

"Why do you even need a guard?"

"They volunteer. They are all volunteers." Centuries of pain were evident in the princess's voice. "I used to send them away. 'Protect my ponies, a goddess needs no guard,' I would tell them. For centuries I sent them away. It was Discord's reign that changed my mind."

"Who?" the secretary interrupted, confusion on his face.

"Discord. He was once much more than a statue in the Royal Gardens. After I sealed him into that stone prison, there was still chaos in the land. I had help," Celestia gave the moon a longing look, "but there was still so much to do. A group of ponies, still under Discord's spell, attacked me. I was forced to defend myself. When the smoke cleared, I... I had killed them."

"How?" The thought that he might be the first in centuries to hear this tale gave him a thrill, but the distress the princess displayed kept his tone respectful.

"Corporal Swift Wing," The princess called out without turning around, "You have a sibling, correct?"

"Yes Ma'am, a younger brother."

"Do you play-fight with your brother? Wrestle, good-natured roughhousing?"

"Not since I joined the Guard, Ma'am. We play card games mostly now. I'm teaching him Poker."

"Because a guard is trained to never pull their punches. If they are forced to use violence, they must give their attack all they have. If a guard gets into the habit of pulling their punches, they are less effective when it is needed. The fraction of a second it takes to calculate how hard to hit is a fraction of a second too long. It can mean the very difference between life and death."

"Yes Ma'am," the guard confirmed.

"Do you think it is any different for me? My claim on immortality is a tenuous one at best. It is simply because I have not died yet. This body still has the instinct of self preservation. I must assume there is a reason for that. I must answer any attack with the full force I am capable of, in defense of my life."

"Ah, yes." It was the only response the castle secretary was capable of. "How can she remember the names of the guards around her without looking at them?" he wondered.

"Standing there, surrounded by corpses, the thought of a guard was an appealing one." She turned her attention to the two injured ponies. "The power my guards are capable of is a much more appropriate response to a threat from normal ponies. They suffer to assuage my guilt. They die to spare me a long convalescence. For this, I love every one of them. On days like this, I wonder if it is all worth it. Standing here, now, I am forced to wonder if I should send them away again. Should I permit this travesty to continue, because of my weakness?"

Princess Celestia bowed her head and allowed her tears to run freely. "I have merely exchanged one form of guilt for another. Either way, there is blood on my hooves. What kind of monster am I to let this happen?"

The room was silent, save the muffled beeps coming from the life support machines in the intensive care rooms. No one spoke, lest they intrude on the alicorn's grief.

-----

It was shortly before dawn when the alarms rang out. The castle staff had long since left the princess to her vigil. Only the guards and nurses remained. Celestia had spent the night, pacing between the two beds, silently willing the two guards to wake and heal. Not even the power to move the sun could help. Physical injuries responded only to time. Celestia really hated hospitals.

The life support alarms on Valiant Charge cut through the air, screaming for attention. Nurses lept to his side. A doctor arrived at a speed that defied belief. The curtains were hastily drawn, obscuring Celestia's view. She moved back, giving the medical ponies room to work. Her ears twitched at every shouted instruction.

In short order, the bed was hurriedly wheeled out. The medics were pushing it towards the lifts at a gallop. "Get him back to surgery, now!" one of them shouted, as the others continued trying to administer treatments on the fly.

Celestia was left alone on the ward, confused and frightened. Shock kept her immobile. Her mind reeled with questions, and there was nopony around to ask. The minutes stretched out. Desperate for some form of activity to occupy her mind, the alicorn went to the washroom. She had the sudden and overwhelming desire to clean the blood out of her coat. The temptation to teleport to her chambers was almost too strong to fight. She forced herself to use the basic facilities provided in the public bathroom.

The ward remained mostly empty when she came out. Her half hearted attempt at grooming had done nothing for her appearance, or her state of mind. The princess took a seat at the bedside of the battered pegasus.

"I'm guessing you are unaware of your pregnancy." Celestia spoke to fill the silence. "I did not know you were in a relationship. You kept that well hidden, Derpy." A flicker of a smile crossed the alicorn's face. "I follow the lives of my guard very closely. Some of it is so I can protect you, and guide you. But most of it is so I can live vicariously. It can be difficult for a goddess to experience the mundane aspects of life."

"Does he treat you well? A foal can be a joy for a couple, if their relationship is strong. I do hope you are happy together. You do realize that while you are unconscious, we have no way to know who to contact. Would you wake up, so we can bring him to your bedside?" The princess cajoled.

"No? I can understand that you are not ready to talk openly about him yet. I do not mean to rush you. Maybe when your parents get here. We got word to them in Cloudsdale. They are on their way. Valiant Charge's parents are also coming from Trottingham. Have you met them? Wonderful ponies, both of them." Celestia's attention drifted.

"Family is a marvelous thing. Parents working together to make your life easier than theirs. Siblings, to learn from and teach. Grandparents to pass on the wisdom of the ages. Our ties to family are what gave rise to civilization." The princess got up from the bedside, and walked to the window.

"Come back to me sister," she addressed the moon. "I miss you. I need you." The goddess stood silent, ruminating on her often repeated prayer. The dawn was due. Whatever hurt she may feel, the sun must still rise. Focusing on the familiar effort, she watched the dawn over a troubled Canterlot.

There was a shuffling of hooves behind her. A nurse cleared her throat. "The unicorn stallion Valiant Charge passed away. A fragment of bone had pierced his heart. There was nothing that could be done."

The nurse stood awkwardly as Celestia wept.

-----

The day brought little change to the ward. Artificial light ruled overhead, and there was a parade of guards and castle staff before the princess. Still she refused to leave Derpy's bedside. Nurses and doctors worked around her. The royal alicorn paid little attention to what occurred around her, focused intently on the bandaged pegasus, still unconscious.

A scroll, coalescing in a flash of dragon fire, appeared before her. From her faithful student, no doubt. A brief wave of panic washed over her. Celestia wondered what the young unicorn had been told. With uncharacteristic speed, she opened the scroll.

Dear Princess Celestia,

The castle Secretary told me that you are at the hospital. Are you alright? Are you hurt? Is there anything I can do?

Please be alright. What are we going to do if she isn't alright Spike? Wait, don't write that! Spike, what are you doing?

Sorry Princess. Your faithful student,
Twilight Sparkle.

With barely a thought, the princess pulled the pen attached to Derpy's medical chart, and hastily dashed off a reply on the parchment she had just received. Her response amounted to little more than a simple "I am fine. Our studies together will resume in a few days." The last thing she wanted was for her student to worry, or get herself underhoof here in the hospital. With no ceremony whatsoever, she flashed it back to the budding mage.

Time passed slowly. There remained no change in the broken mare before her. The machines kept their tireless and mindless vigil. Ponies passed before her, Celestia paid the minimum possible attention. She spoke almost exclusively to the mare in the bed before her. A stilted, one sided conversation. The hospital fell into a routine around the princess.

The Captian of her guard, a dark grey unicorn named Cold Steel, managed to intrude and force her attention on him.

"Ma'am, I am requesting that you sign these discharge papers," his tone was abrupt.

"What?" Celestia's reply was tinged with surprise.

"It has come to my attention that Valiant Charge and Derpy Hooves were fraternizing. That is grounds for a dishonourable discharge."

"What?" The anger behind her query was evident.

"Valiant's diary was brought to my attention. He had detailed the affair within."

"His body is not yet cold, and you are clearing his bunk? More than that, you are reading his private diary?" Barely contained rage was colouring her voice.

"Fraternisation leads to a less effective fighting force. It is against the code of the guard. Where evidence of a relationship of this nature is found, those involved must be punished."

"Both Derpy and Valiant proved their effectiveness in the riots. They behaved with great honour and bravery, and are a credit to the guard. I have never told any pony who they may, or may not love. I will not permit such rules in my guard. I will not sign that abomination."

"Over many years, I have determined this is the best way to run the guard. It is for the greater good that we must have order in the ranks. I'm sorry you find it distasteful, but we must have discipline." His stony expression suggested that he would not be moved.

"Cold Steel, I accept your resignation."

"I... Wait... What?" Fear and confusion replaced his calculating look.

"I no longer trust your judgement." Celestia explained. "There is no place for you in my guard. Your final act will be to ensure that Valiant Charge's next of kin is paid the full death benefit, and Derpy Hooves receives the appropriate medical discharge, and benefits. Your own pension is riding on this."

"I have provided decades of loyal service, and have always acted in your best interests. You can't do..."

"My guard, Steel. My guard.” The princess leaned in close, intruding on Cold Steel’s personal space, so he could see the fury in her eyes. “I will not tell any member of my guard who they are permitted to love. I will not allow anypony to impose such rules." Her voice quavered from the anger behind it.

"But.. I mean, what... Err..."

"Remove yourself from my presence, Steel." The princess turned away from the suddenly deposed guard, and fought to keep herself under control.

Celestia returned her attention to the battered mare before her. The grey pegasus's head was a mass of bandages, and the princess had been told that she had lost her left eye. Her jaw was wired to hold it together. Her wings in splints, to prevent any further damage should she try to move them when she woke. Stitches held some wounds closed, and were a reminder of the surgery she had undergone. Celestia felt sympathetic physical pain just looking at her.

"Derpy, I am sorry." Celestia whispered her. "Please wake up."

-----

The parchment that Princess Celestia floated before her burned into her very soul. It had arrived amid a flurry of activity from her guards. Some had argued that it should be concealed from her. Instead, she had insisted that she would deal with it personally. It took all of her self control not to immolate it on the spot. Instead, she summoned for a guard to be brought to her. A guard well known to her, one she could trust and confide in.

"At your service Ma'am." Shining Armour said as soon as he was in the royal presence.

"How was Cadance's tour of Manehatten? It was your first time leading a security detail, was it not?" Celestia asked in an indifferent tone.

"Yes Ma’am. It was uneventful, and cut short. She insisted we return as soon as news of the riots broke."

"Yes, the riots. How well do you know Derpy Hooves and Valiant Charge?"

"The Barebacks keep to themselves, mostly. I've never had anything to do with them directly. I've never heard anything against them either."

"Invisible guard, and ceremonial guard are the correct terms Shining Armour," the Princess reminded the enthusiastic pony. "Save the 'ironback' and 'bareback' nicknames for the troops. How is morale in the corps?"

"I'd rather not say." Shining evaded.

"That bad?"

"Probably worse."

"I have a task for you, and you alone. You must not speak of it until it is complete. This could make, or break your career Shining Armour. There is going to be a major restructure of the chain of command in the coming weeks, under my personal supervision. Do you understand?" Celestia gave him a look that bored through to his very soul.

"Yes Ma'am." His response was heavy with a tone of respect.

"The three ponies allegedly," Celestia spat the word with obvious distaste, "responsible have been captured. They are being held at the south Canterlot police station. The police are, understandably concerned about handing them over to the Royal Guard. However, we must have access to them to conduct an investigation."

"Yes Ma'am." He kept his response completely neutral.

"You are to go there, to interview them. First, arrange any treatment for injuries they may have suffered, no matter how minor. When you have been assured of their good health, you are to conduct the interviews. You will take meticulous notes. Do you understand?"

"Yes Ma'am."

"I want to know these ponies better than their own mothers do. I want your report to detail their lives in greater depth than the biographies of the founders of Equestria." Celestia floated over two files. "These are a copy of the medical reports on Derpy and Valiant. I want you to determine which member of their gang inflicted every blow they suffered. Do I make myself clear?"

"Yes Ma'am."

"I forbid you to use any form of violence, torture, or intimidation against them. You are to gain this information without even threatening to harm so much as one hair of their manes. You are not to offer them any clemency deals either. Make no promises to them."

"With respect, Ma'am, you are not making this easy."

"Shining..." Celestia took a deep breath, attempting to steady herself. "I have imprisoned gods in stone tombs. I have exiled members of my own family to realms beyond this world. I have torn the bodies of evildoers asunder, and danced on their entrails. I tell you this, not to impress you, but to warn you. I am not to be trusted with these ponies. Should the worst happen, I will need somepony I love to stand between myself and them. Can you do that? Are you willing to protect them from me?"

"I will do my sworn duty, your Highness. I will protect the citizens of Equestria from the threat of harm, whatever form that might take."

Princess Celestia looked through the window to her broken guard. "What do I do, Shining, if I lose two more innocent souls here today?"

"You return to the castle, and do your duty, Princess. And leave me to perform mine."

Without turning from the window, Celestia floated an envelope across the room. The formality of orders, registered with the chain of command, and filled out in triplicate. An army may march on its stomach, but its command breathes paperwork.

-----

It was late afternoon, twenty-four hours since her ill fated parade through the markets. Such a short time to wreak so much havoc. Celestia looked over to the empty space where Valiant Charge's bed had been. Such a short time to ruin lives. The bloodstained bedspread remained on the floor, crumpled in a heap and kicked out of the way. A terrible reminder of the debt on her soul.

"Hurrek," It was the sound of a pony trying to speak with a breathing tube down her windpipe. "Murkelh hurrek."

"Don't try to speak, Derpy," the nurse said in reassuring tones. "I'm going to pull it out. It will hurt, but it will help if you cough. Can you do that for me?"

The nurses telekinetic aura surrounded the tube, and slowly drew it out. Derpy gave a horrible gagging cough as it slipped out of her mouth.

"Don't move, and don't speak. I'll get some water for you." The nurse was gone, at a galloping pace, to fetch a doctor along with the water.

"Princess!" Derpy's voice was husky and raw, the word distorted by her wired jaw.

"Shush, Derpy. I'm here. Do not speak, just rest." The princess responded, relief flooding through her.

"It's an ambush, you have to go!" Her plaintive cry cut Celestia to the core.

"We're safe, Derpy. This is a hospital, you are safe."

"They have weapons," she cried out as the nurse and doctor returned, "We have to go!"

"Derpy, I am safe." Celestia bent down to look her guard in the eye. "Rest now, we are safe."

The goddesses words didn't register with the beaten guard. Instead she thrashed under the bedspread. Alarms began to sound as the life support sensors were torn loose. Fresh blood began to seep from her wounds as her struggles reopened them.

"Quick, sedate her!" the doctor shouted as he fished through a drawer for a syringe.

"What about the foal?"

"We have to save the mother first! Put her out before she tears those stitches!"

"Derpy, I'm here, I'm safe," the princess cried, trying to hold the agitated mare still for the medicos to work. "We're both safe."

"No, please!" Derpy cried as the needle found its mark on her foreleg. "Princess, run for it!" She continued to thrash, fighting the sedative. Fighting the doctor and nurses as they tried to restrain her.

"I'm safe, you're in hospital. We are both safe." the goddess of the day repeated, desperate for her words to register in her loyal guard. "You're safe."

"Reinforcements," she slurred as the drugs took effect. She could see the glint of the armour on the guards that were assigned to the alicorn's vigil. They were drawn to the commotion. "Princess, go. Save yourself."

"Derpy, I'm safe. We are both safe. It's okay, I'm going to look after you." Her voice cracked, formal language was forgotten as she desperately tried to comfort the pegasus. "We're both safe..."

She repeated the phrase, over and over. As much a mantra to herself, as well as words of comfort to the mare before her. She kept repeating it, long after Derpy had again slipped into unconsciousness. Fresh blood from the reopened wounds stained Celestia’s hooves. Her tears fell over the sleeping pony.

Recovery and relocation

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Derpy stood on shaky legs. The doctors has suggested that she start her physical therapy, so here she was, outside in the castle grounds. That had been a surprise all to itself, waking up in the castle infirmary, and being looked after by the princesses private physician. The princess had explained why she was receiving this special treatment, but Derpy was having a hard time believing it.

It was a quiet part of the royal grounds that the infirmary backed on to. Away from the hedge maze and statue garden. An open and undulating space, with a well worn path leading around it. Two laps, the doctor had told her, at a walking pace. She silently congratulated herself on remembering the instruction for the two hours it had taken her to get ready. Although, standing here, now, she wondered if she had the strength to manage it. Preparing herself to set off, that just left the question of the two ponies standing before her.

"I'm sorry, who are you again?"

"We're your parents, dear." The dark grey stallion spoke with such an earnest tone, Derpy believed him at once.

Parents, everypony had parents. Derpy shut her eye, and tried to think. The past was a mystery to her. Fragments floated back to her, but there was no context, and no faces she could recall. Her brow furrowed, while nothing came to mind.

"Don't fret dear," the mare, her mother said. "Try not to think about it."

"Was it you, that told me that old joke? 'Don't think about the elephant.' Just saying 'don't think about it' makes it near impossible to not think..." Her voice trailed off. Anger wouldn't help, and she could see the pain her words was causing. "I'm sorry. I still don't remember."

"It's okay, you just need more time."

"'Time heals all wounds,' right? It's been a week..."

"Almost two," her father corrected without thinking.

"We've had a conversation like this before, haven't we?" Derpy asked, struggling with her memory to reveal the answers.

"It's not important. Let's just focus on your therapy. We'll have a nice stroll through the gardens. I think the roses are coming into bloom." Evasion and distraction, masking a mother's pain.

"Two laps, at a walking pace," recalling the instruction irritated her, while there was so many things that were far more important to remember. "At least it's a nice day for it."

The three set off in silence. Derpy's poor balance and missing eye meant that she looked like a meandering drunk. Her parents stayed close, leaning in to support her when she stumbled. They did their best to ignore the way she flinched whenever one of them brushed against her

-----

Princess Celestia sat on her throne, and did nothing to hide her irritation as court played out before her. The parade of nobles had soured her mood. The speeches of support and unity of the first few days had given way to the typical petty squabbles the Canterlot upper classes were famous for. Had the House of Blueblood really demanded reparations from the royal guard for a trampled garden bed? Where was their sense of perspective?

"Mister and missus Hooves, of Cloudsdale!"

Celestia lept from the throne, and walked across the red carpet to meet them halfway. It wasn't enough, however, to forestall their bows.

"Please, there is no need for such formalities. Let us adjourn to the antechamber for a much more relaxed chat." The princess turned to address her attendants. "I am done with court for today, give my apologies to the remaining petitioners."

Derpy's parents followed Celestia into a small room just behind the throne. It was a cosy place, devoid of the pomp and circumstance of the castle's public spaces. Large cushions were arranged around a low table, with a simple wet bar running along the far wall. There was a small fireplace in one corner, with a heavy cast iron cooktop above it. The princess started the ritual process of brewing a pot of tea, she did not permit servants into this private place. One of her little rebellions against the all pervading intrusion of her royal station.

"How is Derpy's recovery progressing?" She asked as she set a kettle to boil.

"As well as can be expected, Highness. Her physical therapy started today. We all took a walk through the Royal gardens. The roses are coming into bloom nicely."

"Yes, they are a credit to the groundskeepers." Celestia let the silence play out, sensing something troubling the ponies before her. It stretched on, until the water had boiled, and the tea was brewed and poured. They had all set their cups down after the first sip, before Derpy's father cracked.

"We think we should return to Cloudsdale." The statement settled like lead over the group.

"It is still very early days yet, and there is a long road to recovery before her. You are both more than welcome to the hospitality of the castle guest rooms."

"Princess... Your Highness..." Derpy's mother was distraught, and confused by the correct form of address in such an informal situation. "We are a distraction to her, and we're slowing her recovery."

"Whatever do you mean?"

"Her memory has not yet recovered, and with every passing day it becomes less likely that it will. Every day, we have to start over from scratch, re-establish who we are, explain our relationship to her. Every day, her reaction is different. Whenever she falls asleep, we are gone from her mind and have to begin again. It is far too draining for her, emotionally. We are a hindrance to her progress."

The dark grey stallion took over from his emotional wife. "We've been accused of being imposters, of replacing her real parents. While that may hurt, it is at least more bearable that watching her beat herself up for not being able to remember. Every day is an emotional rollercoaster for her, and the last thing she needs right now. She needs time right now. Time to heal. We are draining energy reserves she can not spare."

"Or perhaps you are thinking of your own emotional needs," even as she said it, the princess regretted it.

"Princess! There comes a time when every mother..." the pegasus mare shut her eyes, and tried to focus her thoughts, "When every parent must put the needs of their child before their own. Whatever our 'emotional needs' may be, they are completely irrelevant. Derpy is lucky to be alive. I don't care if she never remembers me, so long as she is alive and well, and able to live a happy life. When she can walk without stumbling, when the splints come off her wings and she can fly again, when she can wake up in the morning and still remember the events of the day before, I will fly to her bedside and spend every waking minute with her. Until then, we're HURTING her, and I will not be responsible for causing my daughter pain if I can help it!"

"I apologize, without reservation. My statement was inexcusable." The goddess of the sun bowed her head in shame. Had she really thought a parent could be so selfish? She wanted to blame her outburst on a day spent mollycoddling the egos of the nobles, but she pushed the ingracious thought from her mind.

"We should leave." The couple stood, the tea forgotten.

"Please, I beg your forgiveness. If you do not wish to stay, I would urge you to write. A letter has a permanence that might make all the difference," the princess suggested.

"Yes, we will. We have already had a photograph taken with her," the pegasus stallion said, "so she will know we were here, should her memory return."

"I apologize again. I owe Derpy a debt I can never hope to repay. I should never have thought ill of you."

"It has been a stressful time for us all." The alicorn noticed that they neither accepted her apology, or offered their forgiveness. While that stung, she could not help but think on how she had wounded them with her careless remark.

-----

As the princess walked in to Derpy's room in the infirmary, she saw her staring at a photograph in a frame. She held it before her, focused intently on the image. Occasionally she would change the angle she held it at, or bring it closer to her face, but she never took her eye from the image. She was looking at it as if her life depended on it. Celestia was loathe to interrupt.

"I forgot who my parents were again today," Derpy spoke with a quiet and reserved tone, as if ashamed. "Every day it feels like I'm a foal again. Learning to walk, being introduced to ponies I should know, but I have never met before. I've been here almost two weeks, or so I've been told, and I still have to ask where the bathroom is. I don't think I'm getting any better. I want to get better." Derpy let out a heavy sigh, as she dropped the picture on the bed in front of her. "I hate this."

"I insulted your parents today, by speaking carelessly. I do not think they are going to forgive me in a hurry. I fear I have spent too much time amongst the nobles, to be able to fit in with the rest of my subjects." The royal alicorn pulled the tiara from her head, and toyed with it using her hooves. "When you spend your day verbally jousting and point scoring, it can be difficult to switch off, and just converse. That is what I was doing, using you to score points against your parents. Their only concern was for you, and I questioned their motive." The princess put the tiara back on her head, and picked up the photograph. "I hate that."

"So," Derpy queried, "We both have had a bad day?"

"And too many of them in a row." The princess gave a wane smile. "This is a nice photograph, all things considered."

"I'm in bandages and splints, and we've all got fake smiles," Derpy breathed deep, "but, yeah. It's a nice photo. I didn't have any photos of them the stuff that was shipped over from the barracks. Is that typical?"

"Every guard is different. There is no 'typical' guard Derpy, every one is an individual. They all volunteer for different reasons. They come from all over Equestria, the only thing they have in common is the desire to protect the ponies of this land."

"What was my reason, do you remember?" Derpy asked in a very small voice.

"Of course," the princess smiled wide, joy lighting her eyes, "I remember all of my guards. You stood proud, your head held high, and said in a strong and clear voice, 'I wish to make Equestria a safer place, and joining the Royal Guard is the best way to protect the country's greatest asset.' You were quite the idealist. I was a little worried that if I did not take you on, you would spend your days trying to guard me anyway."

"But my cutie-mark has nothing to do with being a guard."

"A pony is more than their special talent. You can do more with your life than what your cutie-mark indicates. It is to guide your life, not to rule it."

The princess and the pegasus sat in quiet contemplation for a time. Each turning the days events over in their minds. Two mares, sitting and trying to define their respective lives. One wishing she could remember more, the other wishing there were some things she could forget.

-----

Three days, that was Derpy's new record. She could remember events from the last three days. She had pancakes for breakfast three days ago, the splints came off her wings two days ago, and yesterday a group of her comrades from the guard came to visit. She didn't remember any of them, but it was nice of them, to come around and share their stories of her time in the guard.

She was pregnant too. That was quite the revelation. Reading her diaries had been a shocking revelation. She didn't recognise anything she had written. Reading them had left her feeling disconnected from what was on the page. She couldn't imagine falling in love with somepony so completely, to be willing to risk everything just to be together. But there it was, written in her most personal journal, and her pregnancy noted on her medical chart. It had to be real.

Today, however, she was going to be fitted with a glass eye. The bandages had been taken off her head, and now a doctor and the the princess were attending her in the infirmary.

"Sit still, Derpy. This will go quicker if you don't fidget," the doctor admonished. "We have to take very careful measurements, and inspect the scaring."

"Sorry doctor, it's just a really weird sensation. I've never had anyone poking around in my eye socket before."

The princess looked on from the other side of the room, focusing her magic on the lump of coloured glass before her. The spell was a simple one, a shaping spell. Most of the foals in her school for gifted unicorns practiced it on clay. It was, however, uniquely suited to the task at hand. The glass flowed before her, twitching and turning under her gaze, forming a bright white, gold and black orb before her.

"How is this doctor, for size and shape?" The princess floated the false eye over for him to inspect.

"Yes... Yes, good. It looks ideal, majesty. Has it cooled?"

"Give it a few moments more. Let me check it against Derpy's other eye for colour matching."

The princess floated the newly formed glass eye over beside Derpy's head, just out of her line of sight. The alicorn peered at it, switching her gaze back and forth, turning it this way and that. Derpy's pulse quickened under the close scrutiny of the princess.

"Perfect!" She proclaimed.

"Let me sterilize it, and we can try fitting it."

The floating eye was plucked from Celestia's magic grasp, and quickly dropped into a solution of medical alcohol. It was pulled out and wiped all over with a fine, lint-free cloth, before the process was repeated with distilled water and a different cloth.

"We'll teach you how to do this for yourself before you leave, but for the time being, let us take care of cleaning it."

"Okay," Derpy responded.

"Now, this may feel strange, as we push it in. And you'll want to put in the eye drops straight away, so you don't irritate your eyelids."

"Waagh!" Derpy cried out as the eye was pushed roughly home. "That's so..." She could feel the eye drops now, lubricating her eyelids as she blinked. "How... How does it look?"

"See for yourself," a smiling Celestia waved a wing towards the bathroom.

Derpy walked into the bathroom, the mirror taking up the left side, out of her line of sight as she entered. With a step and a turn, she was facing her reflection. Seeing herself without a mass of bandages over the left side of her face was something of a shock. There were still some stitches to come out, but it looked like she was not going to have much visible scarring.

She turned her attention to the false eye, and watched as it twitched to match the movements of her real one. It was magnificent, a perfect match. It was near impossible to tell one from the other. She couldn't see out of it, of course, but the illusion of the prosthetic was astonishing. Derpy smiled wide, and blinked.

It was pointing in the wrong direction.

Derpy turned her head, and with a wingtip, carefully adjusted the false eye's position. Checking things in the mirror again, she let out a satisfied sigh, and shut her eyes in contentment.

It was pointing in the wrong direction again when she opened them.

The pegasus stepped closer to the mirror and studied the prosthetic closely. It still moved to match the movement of her right eye, it was just pointing in the wrong direction. She closed her eyes very slowly and deliberately.

It was pointing in a different direction when she reopened them.

"This might make things difficult," she thought to herself.

"Derpy, how is it?" the princess called.

"One small issue, princess," she replied. With a sigh, a blink, and a new random direction for her false eye to point, she turned to leave the bathroom.

"Oh, dear," the princess said when she saw the false eye. "Doctor, is there anything you can do?"

He ran Derpy through a series of eye tests, usually reserved for diagnosing lazy eye. He watched her blink, several times, and even pulled the eye out to inspect it closer. Finally he turned and spoke, "False eyes are not in high demand in these modern times. With further study, I could probably figure some way of fixing it to the carrier we fitted to the eye muscles. That might prevent it being dragged out of position when she blinks."

"It's fine," Derpy said. "I suppose I should come out of this with some sort of visible scars. Let's just leave it."

"I don't mind try..." the doctor was interrupted by a raised wing from Derpy.

"It's fine, wonderful actually. It just points in a different direction. It's a small price to pay."

"Derpy, we can try again. I can fix this," the princess promised.

"No," Derpy said in a firm tone. "The goddess of the sun made my false eye herself. That's a story to tell. Far more interesting than having nopony notice it. It's something to tell my child."

"If you wish," Celestia said as she watched Derpy reach back with a foreleg to pat her belly, as pregnant mares are wont to do.

-----

The princess and the pegasus walked through the castle grounds, Derpy's physical therapy continuing. They had adapted the pegasus game of 'bounce' to aid her recovery. She would leap into the air with one wing beat, and then try to stretch out her glide for as long as possible. It was helping her wing strength and improving her landings with her reduced monocular vision. While they progressed through the grounds, they talked.

"I'll have to leave the castle soon, princess."

"Whatever for?"

"I can't live in the castle forever." The pegasus mare stumbled her landing, but quickly recovered and continued. "I'll have to go and find my way in the world sooner or later."

"The hospitality of the castle is yours for as long as you wish. There is no need for you to leave."

"Princess," Derpy furled her wings, "What would my purpose be? What role would I fulfil? Would you make me a duchess, and condemn me to a life of nobility?"

"I could, you know. Half the noble houses of Canterlot were formed on a whim of mine. It is a long standing tradition. It has been a mere twelve generations since the last time I performed the rites." The princess gave a mischievous grin. "It might be exactly what the nobility needs, some fresh blood to shake things up."

"And what of me and my foal?" Derpy asked, aghast. "We would never be accepted. Rumour and innuendo would plague the rest of my life, and my foal would be the subject of relentless bullying."

"If you wish. There is much that you could do here, however."

"Princess, Canterlot is a city of towers, spires, and mountain sides. I'd wipe myself out, crashing into something if I tried to fly here."

"Would you consider returning to Cloudsdale? I'm sure your parents would be eager to help raising their grandchild."

"Cloudsdale has similar architectural features, with the added complication of being made of clouds. Until I can master my weather magic again, I risk bouncing off the buildings, or crashing through them." Guilt crossed her face as she thought of her parents. "Besides, I don't know if my foal is a pegasus yet. If it's a unicorn or earth pony, I'll just have to move again."

"So, have you thought of a place to move to?"

"No," Derpy sighed. "I think an earth pony town would be best. Wide open sky, with few tall buildings. A town small enough to have a strong sense of community. willing to help me find a place to fit in, but big enough and growing, so I won't be a drain on them. Someplace willing to accept a clumsy pegasus, and a single mother."

"I believe I know just the place. Less than a day's journey from both Canterlot and Cloudsdale."

-----

With a squeal of brakes, and a hiss of steam, the train pulled into Ponyville. Derpy gathered her saddlebags, and moved towards the carriage door. She was taking a big risk, moving so soon after her recovery, but she wanted to be well settled in her new home before her foal arrived. The princess had set up an account at the local bank, and had provided her with letters of reference, suitable for whatever career she may choose. With the compensation provided for her injuries, she had time to settle in, and find a place.

There was a map, thoughtfully provided at the exit to the station. Derpy was easily able to figure her way to the inn she was booked to stay at, until she could find somewhere more permanent. She also located her bank without trouble, and the office of the local real estate agent. She would also have to register at the local weather office, and have her records forwarded to the nearby hospital. It was daunting, almost overwhelming.

With nervous steps, she made her way from the station. It was right in the heart of the village. She could clearly see the Town Hall, the tallest building around and an obvious landmark. It should be no problem for her to miss hitting it when flying. There was a bustling marketplace. The sights, sounds and smells assaulted her. Turning away from it, she walked through the rest of the town square.

The town was full of wide open space, and parkland. Coming from Canterlot, where the only way for a large number of ponies to live in the space available was to build towers and live on top of each other, Ponyville was a revelation. Buildings were spread out, offering lots of space. Even the residential areas had small buildings, with large private yards. This looked like a wonderful place to raise a family.

As she continued on to the inn, she chanced on the most glorious aroma she had ever had the pleasure to inhale. It wasn't too much of a stretch to guess that it came from a rather eccentrically shaped bakery, just up ahead. With no need for a second thought, Derpy followed her nose inside.

"Welcome to Sugarcube Corner! Which is a weird thing to call this place, 'caues building have so many corners, I'm not exactly sure which corner we keep the sugar cubes in. Oh, it's probably named Sugarcube Corner, because it's on the corner of Main Street an Sweet Lane. That makes sense! Here I was looking for a specific corner of the shop, and it's built ON a corner. Isn't that crazy? Anyway, I'm new in town, and I just got this apprenticeship here. And you get to be my first customer! That's if you buy anything. I hope you buy something, everything here is really good, and I'm not just saying that, I've tried everything we sell! 'Cause it's important for an apprentice to learn everything as quickly as possible. Hey, your eyes are pointing in different directions."

"Ah, yes. They do that sometimes." Derpy wasn't sure the pink pony before her had managed to breathe during her welcome. "What's that in the oven, right now? It smells wonderful."

"Ooooh, that would be a batch of blueberry muffins. Missus Cake should be bringing them out any second now. Do you like muffins?"

"I don't know," Derpy replied.

"You don't know? Wow! That means that you get to try muffins for the very first time. I didn't think I'd get to see somepony try something for the very first time, on my very first day behind the counter. Well, we've also got raisin muffins, pecan and walnut, chocolate chip... But there is a chocolate chip version of almost every pastry, so I kind of like to skip chocolate chip muffins for other flavours. Banana muffins are popular, and I really like the orange zest ones. We've also got..."

"Just the blueberry muffins for now, please," Derpy interrupted. She dropped some coins on the countertop. "How many will that get me?"

"That's enough for three blueberry muffins, with some left over for something to drink. We make some pretty good milkshakes here."

"I'd rather a pot of peppermint tea, if you have it." Derpy smiled, you couldn't spend so much time with the princess, and not come away with an appreciation of tea.

"Okie-dokie-Loki. Make yourself comfortable, and I'll bring it over to you." With an astonishing backflip, the pink earth pony rushed into the kitchen, crying at the top of her lungs, "I made my first sale! We need those muffins, and a pot of peppermint tea, STAT!"

Derpy settled into one of the booths, somewhat intimidated by the apprentice baker. She shut her eyes, and just inhaled the aroma coming from the kitchen. If the muffins tasted half as good as they smelled, dealing with the hyperactive motormouth would be well worth it. In very little time, the baker was back, with the muffins and the tea.

"Here you go! If you don't mind me saying, three muffins is a lot for one sitting. Would you like me to bag one, or two of these up for you?"

"No, thanks. I'm pregnant, so I'm not sure if this is a craving, or if I'm just hungry."

"You're going to have a baby!? Wow! My first ever customer is going to have a foal! That's wonderful. Where's the father? I bet he's as pleased as punch!"

"He... Passed away, before I found out." Derpy was embarrassed by the lack of emotion that statement had on her. Her expression must have looked properly mournful, however, as the effect of her statement on the young pony before her was dramatic.

"I'm sorry." The look of horror at the perceived insensitivity she had displayed was absolute. Derpy could see tears beginning to well behind the apprentice's eyes.

"It's okay, you didn't know. The situation is complex, but I'm fine, really."

"Really?"

"Really." Derpy took a bite from one of her muffins. "Oh, wow! That's really nice. I guess you could say I found out that I like muffins." She gave the young baker a wink and a smile.

"Yeah, they're good. But I have to say that I prefer cake." The pink baker gave a faltering smile in return, and went back to the counter, leaving the grey pegasus to her meal. After a long sip of her tea, she made a start on the second muffin, enjoying it as much as the first. By the time she finished the third, Derpy had decided she had a new favourite food. She was pouring out the last of the tea from the pot, when the pink baker returned.

"I was taste testing the batter, as we were making the muffins, and I kind of had too much. We didn't have enough batter for the last one. It's too small to sell, and a little burnt. Missus Cake said I could have it, but I'd like to give it to you. It's just a dinky little muffin, but you looked like you enjoyed the others so much, I wanted you to have it."

"Thank you very much," The pegasus said as she picked it up. "I'm Derpy Hooves, by the way. I'm new in town as well."

"My name's Pinkie Pie, and I'm glad you were my first customer. I couldn't have asked for a better first customer. I still think you should have gone for a milkshake, though."

As Derpy made her way from Sugarcube Corner, she couldn't help but think that Ponyville was shaping up to be a great place to live.

Deep wounds heal slowly

View Online

Present day...

Princess Celestia watched as the train disappeared into the tunnel, bound for Ponyville. She wouldn't know the outcome of her experiment for weeks yet. Wishing for a deity higher than herself to offer prayers to, she turned away from the station. Her honour guard fell into step behind her as she made her way back through the streets of Canterlot, one last duty to perform for the day. For a moment she wondered if it might be sadistic of her, but memories of her vigil at the hospital flowed back, fuelling a desire for some form of vengeance, however small.

In no time at all, the alicorn was back at the courthouse. As she walked through the public spaces, members of her honour guard broke off to stand vigilant at doors and hallways. By the time she was entering the cells, only two remained. Upon seeing her enter, the prisoners lept to their feet and offered a deep bow.

"Get up. I will never accept deference from you. In my eyes you will be ponies non grata forever more," the princesses' tone was dark and low, radiating anger.

"Princess, we beg..."

"Shut up," she commanded. "I shall speak, and you shall listen. Then you shall be returned to serve the rest of your sentence." She turned address to the guard on her right, "Leave us."

"No ma'am. Standing orders from the Captain of the guard himself. 'Her royal highness is to never be left alone with these prisoners.'" Both guards remained stalwart.

"My knight, still saves me, by protecting you." She grinned at the prisoners, the way a cat grins at a mouse. "Even from his post in the Crystal Empire. You continue to owe Shining Armour your lives, as I owe him a gratitude nopony could ever understand."

The princess paced before the bars of the cage that held them, as she gathered her thoughts. She focused on her breathing, controlling her anger. She moved back and forth in front of them, her eyes closed. Navigating the space from her memory of it alone. The hate that radiated from her was palpable to all present, and all could sense that it was only sheer force of will that kept the goddess from unleashing her rage. When she finally stopped, and resumed her place between her guards, the prisoners could not help but shuffle back in fear.

"Do not think, for even one moment, that I granted this parole hearing for your benefit." She managed to keep her tone neutral, her eyes unfocused, as if looking beyond the walls that confined them. "True, I would have been forced to abide by the ruling of the board, even if I disapproved. But know this, the parole hearing was never about you."

The princess looked to the guards standing beside her before continuing, "This was all for the pony you beat, and ruined. My former guard, that suffers to this day from your actions. My sister informs me that she still has night terrors. Terrors that even my sister's formidable magic can not alleviate. Terrors that she can not explain when she wakes. Night terrors that her child often wakes to hear. You may consider me merciful, by not telling you of the details of what she suffers as she sleeps."

"Know this, I would trade your three lives in an instant, to ensure restful sleep and pleasant dreams for the rest of her life. Instead, all I have is this pathetic forum, to try to give her demons a voice. Inflict on her yet more suffering, however temporary, to try to heal her fractured mind. Break her yet again..." The alicorn's voice trailed off, tears welling behind her eyes. She concentrated to stop them from flowing. She would never permit herself to appear vulnerable in front of these three ponies. The silence stretched out as the goddess composed herself.

"I have promised Derpy that I shall never ask her to speak at any future parole hearings." The princess stood tall, her eyes focused intently on the three ponies before her. "The next time this board is convened, I shall invite the parents of Valiant Charge to speak."

"Have you ever witnessed the grief of a mother over a murdered son?" Celestia's voice dripped with menace.

-----

Dinky woke, hours before the dawn was due. She lay, and listened to the rhythms of the night. It was all familiar to her, the breeze through the trees outside, the creaking of the house as it cooled, none of the noises she heard held any mystery for her. None caused her any alarm. She lay there, straining to hear the one noise she truly feared. The night remained silent.

The unicorn filly eased herself out of bed, and made her way to the bathroom. When she was finished, she made sure to wash her hooves, like her mother always reminded her. When the last of the water gurgled down the drain, Dinky cocked an ear back towards the bedrooms. Silence ruled. With a small sigh, she made her way to the lounge room.

Her mother's journals were sitting on a low shelf of the bookcase. Brought down from a box in the attic, and stacked with care, all the while her mother had promised to read them with her. They were from before the riots, before the injuries that made her mother the way she was. Dinky pulled one at random from the shelf, and opened it. There wasn't enough light to read, but she could see just enough detail to sate her curiosity.

They were so unlike her mother. The free-flowing script was nothing like the cautious block Derpy used now. Dinky had peeked earlier, and the writing was filled with a confidence that was alien to her. It was also full of words that the little filly would swear that her mother would never use. Then again, she did know that adults sometimes spoke differently around foals. Still, some of what was in the books rankled her. She closed the book, and returned it to the shelf.

Unable to bear the silence any longer, she walked up to her mother's bedroom. Derpy liked to sleep with the window cracked open, and the door ajar. Dinky pushed the door open a fraction wider, and looked to her mother on the bed. Her chest rose and fell in a slow rhythm, her face was relaxed. She looked calm, peaceful. The filly watched her elder sleep, and concentrated on her own breathing. The house remained silent.

Derpy stirred. Something about the way the air moved in her room had changed, and had disturbed her sleep. As she raised her head, she heard a small gasp from the doorway. Opening her eye to the moonlight, and turning to the door, she called quietly, "Dinky, is that you?"

"Yes mum."

"Did you have a bad dream?"

"No, mum," she waited a beat before asking, "Did you?"

"No, no I didn't. It's been awhile since my last bad dream, hasn't it?"

"You haven't had any since your trip to Canterlot, almost two weeks now," Dinky replied.

"That doesn't mean I don't need my snuggle-buddy," Derpy lifted a wing, raising the bed covers for Dinky to scramble under. The little filly squirmed up next to her mother, tucking herself under her mother's wing.

"Did the princess use magic on you to stop the bad dreams?"

"I don't know, maybe," Derpy replied.

"What did it feel like?" Dinky's face was locked in an expression of wonder.

"Actually, it felt pretty horrible. So maybe it wasn't magic, maybe it was just plain old medicine."

Dinky giggled, as she remembered the last time she was sick and had to take medicine. She gave a small sigh before asking, "Do you think Big Mac has toned and mushy-cull-air flanks?"

"Muscular? Dinky, you peeked at my diaries!" Derpy's tone was scandalised.

"Oh, mum. You know that I always peek."

"Dinky, there is a lot of stuff those diaries..." Derpy breathed deep, and admitted defeat, "...stuff that you are going to find out about soon enough. But it's not kind of thing that you should talk about with your friends, at this age. I wanted to read it with you so I could explain all that stuff."

"Okay mum. I promise I won't talk about it. But if you're not having the bad dreams any more, maybe you could have a colt friend. Big Mac seems like a nice pony."

"Mister Macintosh is a nice pony. Dating is not just a case of walking up to somepony and asking them out." Derpy thought for a moment, "Okay, maybe it is. But it's not always that easy. Now, don't go trying to play matchmaker. You saw what happened to your teacher and Mac last 'Hearts and Hooves Day.' We kind of have to figure out how to move at each others pace."

"I know you have been lonely for a long time now, mum. If things get better, if you stop having those dreams..."

"Let's just take things one at a time. I'd like a chance to get used to sleeping through the night. Speaking of which, what woke you up?"

"I don't know. There was nothing wrong, I just woke up."

"Maybe you just missed being my snuggle-buddy? It's still ages before dawn is due," Derpy let out a large yawn. "Snuggle up, let's try and get a few more hours sleep."

"Yes, mum," Dinky said in a tired voice, cuddling in close, and propping her head on Derpy's shoulder.

As mother and daughter drifted back to sleep, the princess of the night watched from a cloud above Ponyville. As the stars twinkled above, Luna smiled, thinking of what she would report to her sister at breakfast.

-----

"Thank you Scootaloo, for yet another thrilling description, and blurry photograph, of Rainbow Dash's latest stunt," Cheerilee managed to keep her voice remarkably free of sarcasm. "Now, I believe it is Dinky's turn for 'Show-and-Tell.'"

The unicorn foal's heart leapt to her mouth. Public speaking had always made her nervous, but today the butterflies in her stomach seemed to be churning extra hard. She made her way from her desk to the front of the class, carefully carrying a velvet presentation box. She had discussed it with her mother, and what she carried was her second preference for a topic to bring to school. Her first choice had been the full suit of armour, with her mother wearing it, of course. She had been forced into a compromise.

"Miss Cheerilee, could you open this, and pass it 'round for me?"

As she opened it, the usually unflappable teacher gave a gasp that could be heard all the way to the Everfree Forest. Deciding not to leave such a treasure to the hooves of her students, Cheerilee walked the box around the classroom herself, keeping it a safe distance from rambunctious foals.

"That is my mum's 'Medal of Valour,'" the little filly told the class before her. "Princess Celestia gave it to my mum, for what she did during the Canterlot riots ten years ago."

"Miss Cheerilee, we're not allowed to make up stories for 'Show and Tell.' That blank-flank has to stop lying," the class bully spoke in an arrogant tone. "Princess Celestia would never be in the same room as a pony like Derpy."

"Now, Diamond Tiara. Everypony was quiet and polite when you brought in the paperwork for your trust fund last week. Today is Dinky's turn. I have to say, this medal looks like the real thing to me. Go on Dinky, we're listening." The teacher made a point of making eye contact with the missguided filly.

"My mum was so too a guard! She still is, in a way. She's a re... res... reservist. She's got letters at home, from the princess! And her diaries... But I'm not supposed to talk about those. It's why she is the way she is! She was hurt... Her eye that always points the wrong way, is a gla... glass eye! She... she..."

"Dinky, Dinky, it's alright. Don't get upset," Cheerilee rushed forward, to calm her charge. "Just take a moment, and go back to telling us about the medal. Take your time, shut your eyes and think happy thoughts if you need too."

The little unicorn stood there, shaking like a leaf after her outburst. She did shut her eyes, but all she could think of was how telling everypony was supposed to make everything better. Ponies would stop being mean to her mum, if she could just tell them why she was different. The anger at being called a liar just hurt too much.

"It's called the 'Medal of Valour,' and the princess gives it to guard ponies who get hurt in the line of duty," Dinky spoke in a monotone, looking to the floor. With Diamond Tiara still saying bad things about her mum, all the fight had gone out of her. "The princess gave it to mum for 'courage and bravery above and beyond the call of duty.' She nearly died in the riots. It's why I don't have a dad, because he did die in the riots. Mum was hurt so bad saving princess Celestia, and she gave her the medal, and I just wanted you to see it."

"Thank you Dinky," Cheerilee said when it became obvious that the filly wasn't going to say anymore. "That's enough 'Show and Tell' for today. Now, everypony take out your work books. We have a math quiz coming up, and some of you still need to work on long division."

Dinky trudged back to her seat, amid groans and protests about the upcoming math work they were about to start on. She took her seat with a sullen expression on her face. Despite the best efforts of Applebloom, sitting next to her, she refused to be drawn out of her shell. She just sat there, working on the math problems she was assigned, and tried to ignore the rest of the world.

-----

"Hey, Dinky! Wait up!" Scootaloo called after the retreating unicorn filly. "Don't let what Diamond Tiara said get to you."

"The first words you said when you saw mum in her uniform was that she stole it," Dinky countered in an argumentative tone.

"That was just the shock talking."

"Dinky, ma sister tells me that some ponies jus' wanna hurt others, 'cause it makes 'em feel better about themselves," Applebloom said as she caught up. "Diamond Tiara jus' a bully. Gettin' you all mad is what she wants."

"We're going to Sugarcube Corner for milkshakes. Do you want to come with us?" Sweetie Bell asked, hope in her voice.

"No, I've got to get home. I don't want to risk losing the medal. Besides, we've got a lot of homework to do."

"It's Friday. You've got all weekend to do homework. Come and have a milkshake. I'll let you ride my scooter." The orange pegasus tried sweetening the deal.

"No, mum says I should always come straight home after school," Dinky spoke as she turned down the road to her home, away from Sugarcube Corner, and the rest of town.

"Well, we're jus' gunna hafta walk you home then," Applebloom said.

"Yeah!" the other two crusaders chorused.

Dinky walked on quietly, the press of the other three fillies around her intimidating her. For the most part she tried to avoid being drawn into their conversation, oddly centered around the best way to remove tree sap from your mane. She stopped at the gate to her front yard.

"Thanks for walking me home. I guess I'll see you on Monday."

"Or you could come and play with us over the weekend?" Sweetie Bell asked hopefully.

"Maybe, I'll talk to mum about it," she replied, noncommittally.

"YAY!" the three fillies shouted as they turned back towards their planned milkshake date.

Dinky slipped quietly into the house, and settled herself in to start on her homework. She sat at the kitchen table, school books surrounding her, and rolled her pencil back and forth. Despite her best efforts, Diamond Tiara's accusation kept floating through her mind. With an angry sigh, she picked up a random textbook, and threw herself into learning the difference between adjectives and adverbs.

-----

"Trottingham?" Dinky asked. "We're going to Trottingham for summer vacation?"

"Yes. With a stop in Canterlot on the way back." Derpy smiled wide, her enthusiasm obvious.

"But, what's in Trottingham?" The filly asked, puzzled.

"Not what, but who. Your grandparents are there."

"Nana and Pop live in Cloudsdale, what are they doing in Trottingham?" Her brow furrowed deeper.

"No," her mother corrected. "Your other grandparents. Valiant Charge's parents. I wrote to them after getting back from Canterlot. Princess Celestia suggested it. We never really kept in contact after I moved to Ponyville. Going out to meet them is long overdue, don't you think?"

Dinky knew that everypony had two sets of grandparents, but it was something she had never really thought of as applying to her. Now that she thought about it, it seemed so obvious. Just because her father had passed away, didn't mean that his parents were also gone. Her friend Applebloom still had her Granny Smith, after all. The unicorn filly had just never made the connection.

"Trottingham?" She asked in a meek voice.

"We've got our very own sleeper car berth for the trip. You always wanted to take a big train trip," her mother cajoled.

"Are you sure you are up for this, mum?"

"Dinky, you don't need to take care of me. The dreams have stopped. I may still need my snuggle-buddy, but you don't need to be my nurse any more. Now is the time for you to make the most of your foal hood."

Dinky sat there, looking from the tickets, to her mother. It was a lot to take in, in a very short space of time. She wasn't sure she was ready.

"Trottingham?" She let a little of the fear she was feeling seep into her voice.

-----

It was a small, but vocal group that came to see mother and daughter board the train to Trottingham. The three Cutie-Mark Crusaders had insisted, as soon as they had heard the news. Rarity had come to chaperone her sister, and Applebloom had somehow convinced Big Mac to escort her. It was a confusing round of hugs, conversations, and well wishes. As they had managed to wind up at the station nearly one and a half hours early, the 'good-byes' were starting to get ridiculous.

Dinky watched as her mother blushed and squirmed every time Big Mac looked in her direction. While the little unicorn was no expert at romance, she did notice how Sweetie Bell's older sister kept coming up with excuses to leave them alone, or tried to initiate conversations between them. Dinky figured that she wouldn't need to play matchmaker, it looked like the rest of Ponyville was already working on it.

"All aboard!" The conductor cried.

Ponies shuffled forward, pressing into the carriages. Shouts and cries echoed up and down the platform. Dinky was already clambering into the train, when Big Mac pulled Derpy aside.

"I'll see you when ya' get back," he said in his characteristic drawl.

Derpy blushed, it was the longest sentence he had uttered all day. It took all her concentration to keep her wings locked and parked at her sides. With no time for anything more intimate, Derpy flashed him a grin as she climbed into the carriage.

Amidst the hissing of steam, and the mournful wail from the whistle, the train pulled out from the station. After waving good bye to her friends, Dinky turned to her mother.

"What are my grandparents like?"

"I don't know, Dinky. I have never met them before. Princess Celestia did describe them as 'wonderful ponies' once."

The train rushed onwards.