Twilight vs. Oral Hygiene
Twilight vs. Oral Hygiene
There are three kinds of days. One is the average day, or the “neutral” day. These are days when nothing out of the ordinary happens. There are some bad moments, but also some good moments. There are even some odd moments that are never expected to occur.
A second kind of day would be those riddled with good luck. A day when everything seems to be going one’s way. For instance, one day Rarity had the good fortune of having Photo Finish stop by her shop and offer her the chance to promote her clothing in a fashion show. In the same day, she also sold her most expensive gown to a bride-to-be. The white unicorn bragged about her good fortune for the entire week, to the point of becoming annoying. Soon, everypony either avoided her, constructed an excuse to not stay and chat, or found means of plugging their ears to avoid hearing her posh voice call out to them. Never had the Ponyville Outdoor Pursuits Shop sold so many ear-muffs as they did that week, especially in the summer.
Finally, there is the one more kind of day, the day that everypony dreads. One writers stereotype with cloudy skies and hazy downpours, even though they occur in all weather. These days, of course, are the days defined by bad luck. Days when everything that could possibly go wrong, does. An example of such a day could be seen on the day of the Dragon Migration, when Rainbow Dash was beaten down and stomped on by Fluttershy, and scorched by a dragon’s fire. (I have an urge to put in a Merriweather Lewis joke here, but I won’t lol)
Unfortunately for Twilight Sparkle, however, today was one of the bad-luck days.
Twilight stood inside the town’s library, a very aggravated look on her face. The lavender unicorn tapped her hoof against the ground in irritation, violet eyes boring holes into a burly unicorn stallion that towered over her. He had a clipboard floating in front of his face as a levitating pen scribbled notes. A small emblem on his saddlebag read “Ponyville Plumbing Services”.
“Right, so that’s all of it.” said the stallion, finishing what he was writing before floating the pen into his saddle-bag. But the scowl on Twilight’s face remained.
“I still can’t believe you had to take out every single one of my pipes.” Twilight said.
The stallion shrugged, “What can I say Lady? This library may look good from the outside, but if you look at the inside, you’ll see that it’s incredibly dated. From the floorboards,” he ran his hoof along the wood floor, tracing a long crack, “to your plumbing.”
“But did you have to remove all of the pipes?” Twilight asked.
The stallion nodded. “Until tomorrow. By then we’ll be back to install the new piping. Trust me, you’ll be the better off for it. The plumbing was running on its legs for quite some time, and it needed to be changed. And trust me when I say, you do not want to have your plumbing fail on you,especially the pipes leading to your septic tank.” He shuddered, imagining the time he had to fix the plumbing at a Mexican restaurant. Never had he seen such a filthy bathroom.
“So what you’re saying is that I have to wait until tomorrow?” Twilight gulped, looking up at a nearby clock. The time read nine in the morning. “I have to go all day without taking a shower? Or washing the dishes? Or using the bathroom? Or washing my hooves!?!”
Twilight looked down at her two, violet hooves, imagining the amount of germs that would get on them from neglecting to wash them for an entire day. “That’s so unsanitary. I mean, I’m not Rarity. But I still have an interest in staying clean.”
“My suggestion,” the stallion levitated his clipboard into his saddlebag and clipped it closed, “is to buy some hoof sanitizer and use that for the time being.”
“But I hate sanitizer. It always dries my hooves up!” Twilight yelled, holding up her hooves to the stallion’s face, pressing them against his cheeks. The plumber swatted the violet-colored hooves away and looked down at the pleading mare.
He sighed. “Look, I don’t know what to tell you. I’m sorry, but that’s how it has to be until tomorrow.” He then pointed out of a window. “Why don’t you spend the day outside? It’s quite lovely out; the pegasi have done a fine job clearing the skies.”
Twilight didn’t answer, she was too angry. The stallion noticed her silent rage and silently decided it was time to leave.
“Well, have a nice morning, ma’am. Sorry about the inconvenience.” He turned and walked out the door. It closed with a nice, solid “thunk” that brought the mare back to reality. It was bright as could be outside, yet she felt alone. Spike was out helping Rarity design dresses. At least that’s what he said, while in reality he simply acted as a living pincushion or servant to do whatever she asked of him, usually involving bringing her spools of thread and rolls of fabric. It was still helping, but Spike still acted like he helped her construct the dresses.
Twilight made her way around the library, looking at the towering shelves of books, towering over her and making her feel small.
“Geez, am I really letting this water thing bother me this much?” Twilight asked herself. The room seemed to brighten up a bit more as her tension wore off. The initial annoyance and anger she’d felt was gone. Well, maybe not gone, but it had definitely lessened. Sighing, she made her way up the stairs, towards her bedroom. It was getting late and she was planning to meet Rainbow Dash at the park so she could watch her perform some of her newest tricks. But before she could go, she had to take care of one thing very quickly.
She had to brush her teeth.
Twilight entered her bathroom. The aged wooden floor contrasted to the more modern countertop, made of a brilliant marble. She stood over the sink and sighed, reaching out to turn on the faucet only to be met by silence. She was confused at first, until she remembered the lack of plumbing.
“Duh, how could I forget something I was thinking about not two minutes ago?”
The mare pulled out her toothbrush and a tube of toothpaste. Or at least it was once a tube, for now it was as thin as paper; Twilight could tell that it was almost empty. If there was any left in the near-empty vessel, it would likely only be enough for one more brush. She popped the cap and started to squeeze, but nothing would come out. She squeezed harder and harder, pressing her hooves at the bottom of the tube and working them up, hoping her method would result in some toothpaste being successfully pushed out.
Alas, it was empty. Rolling her eyes, Twilight tossed the empty tube into the nearby trash-bin. She opened the cupboard up and looked inside, hoping to find a new tube of toothpaste, But all she saw was an unopened bottle of mouthwash, some bottles of moisturizer, shampoo, and a few spare boxes of soap.
“Oh joy, this day just keeps getting better and better.” Twilight said with a sarcastic chuckle. Closing the cupboard and cursing under her breath, the unicorn made her way out of the bathroom and then out of the library.
After walking through town for ten minutes, Twilight finally reached the dentist’s office. It was no bigger than any of the other buildings in town. Only two stories high with a giant sign above the door, reading “Colgate’s Dentistry” in big, blue letters. A large statue of a tooth was placed just outside of the door. What made this statue stand out, however, was the face painted onto it, notably its toothy grin.
”A tooth with a mouth-full of teeth? I wonder if the artist even thought that through.” she thought with a shudder before making her way to the door.
The tiny little bell above the door rang as she trotted into the shop.The walls were painted a light blue with white stripes running along it. The relaxing sound of classical music reached Twilight’s ears, eliciting a sigh of content from the mare. There were some patients sitting in chairs, waiting to be called back, reading magazines or the newspaper to fight boredom.
Twilight made her way over to the back counter where she saw Colgate talking to her receptionist, before sending her off back to do something- most likely get one of her dental stations ready for the next patient. The light-blue unicorn dentist looked up to see Twilight walking over to her and grinned.
“Hello Twilight, how are you?” Colgate asked in a merry voice- something not often associated with dentists.
“I’m fine, Colgate.” Twilight looked around, the walls covered in a brilliant layer of light blue that matched the dentist unicorn’s coat. “ I see you finally got the interior of this place painted.”
“Yeah, took long enough. Dang painters kept trying to rip me off, but they eventually saw my way. And now, it’s done.” Colgate said, admiring her office. “So, enough about me. What brings you by?”
“I just need some more of your toothpaste, that’s all,” Twilight said. “I’m all out and I’d prefer not to go around town with bad breath.”
Colgate’s smile vanished, her eyes looking shamefully away from her customer.
“Oh, gosh Twilight I’m...I’m sorry - I’m out of my usual toothpaste.” Colgate said apologetically. Twilight face-hoofed.
“However...”
Twilight looked up hopefully to see Colgate reaching under the counter and pulling something up. The blue unicorn held out a tube of toothpaste, unopened and much thicker than the tube Twilight was used to.
“I do have this experimental stuff, if you’re willing to test it out.” Colgate said. Twilight made a reach for the tube, only to have Colgate pull it back. “Just a warning, though. This stuff if incredibly thick and heavy duty. Swallowing it won’t cause any problems, but you don’t want to get any of this stuff in your eye. It’ll hurt worse than getting a cavity-filling without Novocaine.”
“Why would I worry about toothpaste getting in my eye?” Twilight asked, puzzled.
“You’d be surprised how often that happens with the ponies in this town.” Colgate snickered, picturing all of the stories she heard from patients getting toothpaste stuck in their eyes. She initially thought the high occurrence of it was strange, but since most cases involved unicorn foals that just started learning basic magic, it made more sense. “So, do you understand what I’m getting at? About being careful?”
Twilight nodded, a gleeful grin stretched across her face. “Yes, of course!” She handed Colgate some bits and took the toothpaste, “Thank you very much.”
Colgate smiled, “No problem. have a nice day Twilight!”
“You too!” Twilight answered before heading out of the office. She made her way back to the library, humming a light tune as her spirits started to lift a bit after the stress filled morning.
Twilight dropped the toothpaste tube onto the counter of her bathroom and stared it down. It felt like a boulder had been pulled from of her back, so many stresses of the day gone, replaced by a determination to move on and get on with her morning.
“Okay, let’s get this over with so I can finally meet up with Rainbow Dash.” she said, uncapping the tube. The first thing the studious unicorn noticed was the smell. She retracted, nearly gagging at the pungent odor that flooded her nostrils.
“Holy Celestia that reeks.” she said, plugging her nose with her hoof. Slowly, she pulled her hoof away, seeing if the smell was still there. To her relief, it seemed to have dissipated. She then proceeded to grab the now open tube in her magical aura and hold it above her brush, ready to squeeze out the contents. She squeezed the bottle with her magic, expecting the substance to come out and land onto the bristles.
But nothing did. She examined the toothpaste with a set of perplexed eyes before she tried to squeeze the tube again. This time she added more of her energy, hoping it would be enough. Alas, the stubborn paste refused to exit its home. Twilight started to get sick of her lack of success. It was a toothpaste tube and it was besting her. She was Celestia’s personal student! Her magic could turn animals into oranges and teleport her far distances, yet she couldn’t get a single glob of toothpaste out of the tube?
She tried again ... and again ... and again. Sweat started running down her face while her head and horn started to throb. She collapsed in exhaustion, panting as she stared up at the still un-squeezed bottle of toothpaste. It seemed to mock her, though that could have just been her own hurt pride. Standing back up, Twilight braced herself like she was ready to attack a wild beast, eyes focused and adrenaline pumping through her veins.
“Okay, I’m done playing nice. I’m going to make you come out if it’s the last bucking thing that I do!” Using all of her magic and every ounce of energy left in her tired body, Twilight squeezed the tube one last time. The opening pointing at the toothbrush, which was right in front of her face. Her eyes remained open, but she was squinting. She could feel a blood vessel in her forehead poking out, her teeth grinding. Finally, she could see the tube start to compress, and the smallest bit of blue started to creep out of the opening.
“Almost...almost...” The tiny bit of toothpaste was about to exit when, inexplicably, the tube caved and a stream of toothpaste shot out directly into Twilight’s eyes.
“Ah!” the purple unicorn reared back, covering her eyes as the toothpaste worked its way under the lids. “Ow, stinging, stinging...owie, owie, owie. Wow, Colgate wasn’t kidding. This is horrible!”
Twilight grimaced, running over to the sink. “I need to wash this out now!”
Blindly, she reached for the handle, fumbling around until she felt her hoof grab it. The panicked unicorn turned the handle and put her waiting hoof under where she thought the faucet was, waiting for crystal-clear water to come out of the faucet. But just as before, nothing happened. Remembering the lack of water, coupled with the searing pain that her eyes were in, Twilight couldn’t help but panic. She tried the sink a few more times, as if she believed the plumber had lied and a spontaneous stream of water would come shooting out at any minute. Alas, her hopes were shattered after every attempt.
“Oh come on!” Twilight screamed, before she finally gave up. Her eyes were still burning and watering. She could get quick, blurry glances of the outside world, but for the most part she was blind. She started to feel around for a towel to wipe her eye off when she heard a light rap at the door to the bathroom.
“Twilight, are you okay?” came the familiar-sounding voice of a baby dragon.
“Spike?” Twilight muttered, turning to the source of the voice. She tried opening her eyes to make out her friend, but only managed to see a little purple and green blur before the pain forced her to close her eyes. “Spike, is that you?”
“Who else would it be?” asked the dragon. “I just got back from Rarity’s. What’s going on?”
“I’ll tell you in a minute. Could you please grab me a towel? I can’t see anything.”
Spike ran over to a nearby rack of towels and handed it to Twilight, who used it to dab her eyes. Unfortunately, it didn’t help. In fact, the rubbing seemed to make the pain worse. She knew that if she wanted to make the pain cease and have her vision return, she would need to rinse out her eyes with water.
Water that she didn’t have.
“Oh pony feathers, it’s not working.” She said, placing the towel onto the counter-top and letting out a sigh. “Ow...it feels like somepony poured acid in my eyes!”
Spike rose an eyebrow at Twilight’s comment. “And you know how that feels, how exactly?”
If Twilight could open her eyes, she’d shoot Spike an angry glare for his snide comment. Since that was impossible, she simply shook her head.
“It’s just a simile, Spike. Just a simile.”
“What happened, anyway?” Spike asked. Twilight turned her head towards her number one assistant, eyes still shut.
“The stupid toothpaste wouldn’t come out of the tube so I kept trying to push harder and harder until it shot out and hit me in the eyes.”
Spike’s eyes lit up. He let out a small snicker before clamping his mouth shut with both claws in an attempt to keep any more giggles from escaping.
“What’s so funny?” Twilight snarled.
“You...you pushed too hard and it squirted into your eyes?” Spike asked.
Twilight wanted to roll her eyes at his question, but just gave a simple nod. “Yes.”
Spike started to laugh, “Ha-ha! Twilight, I can’t believe you did that! Miss ‘Slow and Steady wins the Running of the Leaves’ gets toothpaste in her eyes because she was impatient? Bwahahaha!”
Twilight started to growl, “Spike, this isn’t funny. My eyes really hurt, and I can’t see!”
“I’m sorry, but you set yourself up perfectly.” Spike sneered, clutching his stomach which ached from his laughing. “I’m not laughing at the pain, I’m laughing at the fact that you got toothpaste into your eyes. Who does that? Ha-ha!”
Twilight was done, she was in absolutely no mood for being teased by an inconsiderate baby dragon that couldn’t stop laughing.
“Spike, ENOUGH!”
In her rage, Twilight slammed her hoof against the counter-top. Unfortunately it didn’t land on the hard surface of the counter, rather it landed directly onto the still-thick tube of toothpaste. She put so much force into the motion that a new, giant glob of toothpaste shot out of the tube and right into Spike’s eyes. As soon as the blue gel made contact, searing pain shot caused the dragon to fall over, screaming in agony.
“Ah! It burns!”
Twilight gasped, “Oh my gosh! What happened!?! I can’t see, but it sounded bad!”
“You got toothpaste in my eyes too!” Spike screamed, rolling around with his hands over his eyes. “And I totally agree with you on the whole ‘acid’ thing!”
“Oh no! Spike, I’m so sorry!” Twilight said.
“I thought you said you had trouble getting any toothpaste out of the tube!” Spike screamed, sitting up with an angry expression on his face. Not that he or Twilight could tell as they were both blind as bats. “How could hitting it once send toothpaste into my eyes?”
“I must have loosened it up.” Twilight answered. “But that isn’t what’s important right now. We need to get some water.”
“Okay, so let’s use the sink.” Spike said, “Can you direct me there?”
“Our plumbing is out. We won’t have running water until tomorrow.” Twilight answered.
For a moment, Spike’s face showed disbelief. Then, growling in aggravation, he turned to leave the bathroom.
“Well then, let’s go get some hel---ooof!” Spike grunted, smacking face-first into the wall.
“Spike, are you okay?”
“Fine. I just ran into the wall.” the baby dragon replied, rubbing his nose with his claw in an attempt to ease the pain caused by the collision.
Twilight face-hoofed. “Spike, you need to be careful. You could really get hurt.”
“I’m already hurt.” Spike said, squeezing his eyes further shut as another shot of pain ran through them. “How are we gonna get out of here if we can’t see?” Spike asked, trying to find the open doorway, only to clock his forehead against the toilet bowl.
“Ow!” he yelped, grabbing his forehead and taking a few, deep breaths in an attempt to dull the pain. Suddenly, he felt himself get levitated up off of the ground. “Um...Twilight, what are you doing?”
“I’ll get us out of here.” the determined, yet blind, unicorn said.
“But you can’t see either.” Spike said, a small amount of fear in his voice.
Twilight grimaced and opened her eyes the best she could, which was hardly at all. Her tears and the remnants of toothpaste from under her lid blurred her vision almost to the point where she might as well keep her eyes closed.
“I can see some blurry stuff. It’s not much, but it’s better than nothing.”
With that, Twilight made her way to the open doorway, levitating Spike by her side. A pain of queasiness hit him in the stomach. He wasn’t exactly sure where this was going, but he knew for a fact that it wouldn’t be good.
“How can toothpaste hurt this much, anyway? It feels worse than when I get shampoo in my eyes.” Spike mumbled just before Twilight accidentally bumped him head-first into a wall.
Groaning, the dragon rubbed his head with his claw . “Owie.”
“Colgate said it’s heavy duty, and it hurts if it gets into...WAHHHHH!!!”
Twilight was cut off as her hoof made contact with nothing but air, causing her to lose her balance. She and Spike tumbled down the wooden stairs, screaming as they hit every, single, individual step. Like two basketballs, they made their way down, letting out little grunts of pain with each bounce. Once both librarian and assistant found terra firma- namely the library’s wooden floor- they both lay on the ground, groaning.
“Okay, so we’re on the first floor...I think.” Spike mumbled, still a bit discombobulated from the tumble.
“We are.” Twilight shook her head before getting to her hooves, one of her front ones outstretched to feel her way around. “Okay, the door shouldn't’ be too far...oomph!”
Twilight smacked into one of her many shelves with such force that some precariously-placed books fell, landing onto her head one at a time. She fell over, feeling even more disoriented than she was after falling down the stairs.
“Ugh...could we catch one break? Just one?” Twilight mumbled to nopony in particular.
While the unicorn was busy collecting her bearings, Spike continued to stumble around the library, trying to find the door. His hand finally grabbed onto a doorknob. Grinning, he turned it and stepped through.
“Twilight! I found the door. Follow the sound of my voi----AHHHHH!”
Twilight then heard the sound of the baby dragon falling down another set of stairs, mixed with the occasional “oomph” as he bounced off the steps before finally hitting the floor.
“That’s the basement!” Twilight shouted, still trying to feel her way to the door.
“I...know...that...now...” Spike mumbled from downstairs. “It’s too late...for me...Twilight...save yourself...!”
“I’ll come back for you!” Twilight shouted back to her downed companion. She tried to open her eyes a little as she did before, but this time the pain was too great and she was forced to close them. She was running short on time and needed to wash her eyes out as soon as possible. Slowly, she went in the direction she thought the door was in, keeping the bookshelves to her left the entire time.
“Careful...steady...<bang> Ow! That’s my desk.” Twilight skirted around her desk, clutching her sore stomach that had plowed right into the edge of it. She continued on, every now and then bumping into a stray plant or something. Finally, her hoof felt the relieving touch of the wooden door. Sliding across it, she found the brass door-knob. It was frigid to the touch, something that typically annoyed her. But after the stress she had been through, she never felt so happy to have her hoof feel frost-bitten simply from touching a piece of metal.
“Success!” she shouted, turning the doorknob. “Freedom, here I...”
WHAM!
In that moment, Rainbow Dash burst into the library, swinging the door open with such force it smashed into Twilight and pinned her between it and the wall.
“Heya Twilight!” Rainbow Dash said cheerfully, looking around the library for her friend only to be met with nopony. “Um...? Where are you?”
“Bwhehind the dwoor.”
Rainbow Dash spun around to see the door slowly move away from the wall. She reached out a cyan hoof to pull it all the way back to see a disoriented Twilight slide to the floor. Her eyes were closed, but it was clear that she was in a daze. Rainbow Dash looked at her downed friend and couldn’t help but snicker.
“He-he, sorry about that.”
Twilight got to her hooves, eyes still closed as she frowned. “What do you want, Rainbow?”
“I came by to see what’s keeping you. I’ve been at the park waiting for...” The pegasus stopped when she caught a glimpse of Twilight’s swollen eyes. She tilted her head like a confused puppy at her friend’s odd expression. “Twilight, are you okay?”
“Oh yeah I’m perfectly peachy. It’s just that a massive amount of toothpaste flew into my eyes and now I can’t see anything.” Twilight said, a tinge of rage in her voice..
“Really? Because you sound angry.” Rainbow Dash said, still a look of befuddlement on her face.
“OF COURSE I’M ANGRY! DON’T YOU KNOW SARCASM WHEN YOU HEAR IT!?!”
Rainbow Dash recoiled, “Geez. Sorry, it’s just hard to tell what you’re feeling when your eyes are closed! I’m not sure if you’re trying to frown at me or you’re just in horrible pain.”
“I’m both.” Twilight muttered under her breath.”The worst part is that we have no running water, so we both need to find someplace that does. That’s not easy when you can’t see two feet in front of you.”
“We?” the pegasus asked, confused. “I thought you were the only one.”
Twilight shook her head, “No, Spike got toothpaste in his eyes too.
Rainbow Dash stared at her friend in disbelief. “What? How did both of you manage to get hit? Were you two having a toothpaste fight or something? ”
“Long story.”
“Twilight blinded me!” Spike shouted from the basement.
“Shut it!” Twilight snarled back.
“Would you mind getting me back upstairs Rainbow? The floor’s all sticky and...I think something just brushed up against my leg...oh man, there’s movement.” Spike called up.
The pegasus zoomed off and down the stairs to the basement to find Spike sitting on the floor. She let out a small “eep” when she saw a horde of rats all around him. Little red, beady eyes seemed to glow in the darkness as the little critters scurried all around the blinded dragon.
Rainbow Dash grabbed Spike and lifted him up before flying back upstairs. Once she reached the ground level, she gently placed the baby dragon onto the floor. He patted the wooden surface as if searching for tangible reassurance and let out a sigh of relief.
Rainbow Dash’s eyes darted back to the open door to the basement. “Twilight, I think you might want to start investing in some mouse-traps or something.”
“Why?” Twilight asked, blindly following Rainbow Dash’s voice until she was standing next to Spike.
“Don’t question it.” Rainbow Dash said, shuddering at the memory of the rats. She backed away from the door and walking over to join her two blinded friends. “So, you both need water to wash your eyes out with water, yes?”
The two blind friends nodded in unison.
“And you can’t because the library currently has no running water.”
Again, the unicorn and dragon nodded.
“Hm...” Rainbow Dash put her hoof to her chin in thought. “Ah-ha! I’ve got it. Why don’t you two come outside. I’ll get a rain-cloud and you can wash your eyes out underneath it.”
“Okay, that should work. I guess.” Twilight answered. She wasn’t too happy about getting her coat all wet, but her desire to rid herself of the anguishing pain overrode her hatred of feeling soaked. Spike, on the other hand, didn’t care. Mostly because wet scales were nowhere near as annoying as wet fur.
“Excellent, just think of it as your replacement shower until your pipes come in tomorrow.” Rainbow Dash suggested, flying over to the door as both Twilight and Spike kept facing the direction Rainbow Dash was standing in moments before.
Twilight smiled, “You know what? That’s a great point, I didn’t think of it like that.”
“I agree. I was hoping to get clean anyway. Working with Rarity is surprisingly exhausting.” Spike said, wiping imaginary sweat from his forehead.
“Okay Rainbow, we’re with you. Lead the way.” Twilight said before she, and Spike, started to walk off to where they thought the front door was. Unfortunately, they both forgot they were facing the wrong direction. Twilight and Spike were now both walking away from the front door and towards the back of the library.
“Awesome! Let’s go then!” Rainbow Dash said, opening the door and turning around to see her two friends about to step through the still open doorway to the basement. The sky-blue pegasus extended a pleading hoof.
“Wait! That’s the...!” The sky-blue pegasus started, but it was too late. Both Spike and Twilight went tumbling down the stairs, letting out grunts of pain and saying “ouch” over and over. Rainbow Dash couldn’t help but face-hoof and let out a groan. “...wrong door.”
“Ah!’ Twilight shrieked. “Why in the hay does the floor feel alive!?!”
“Like I said,” Rainbow Dash called down, “mouse traps”
Spike stood in front of a mirror, closely examining his eyes, still red from his troubles with the toothpaste. They were achy, but it was more of a dull ache that annoyed rather than caused significant pain. He smiled at his reflection, chuckling at how odd he looked with the reddened eyes.
“He-he, I look evil.” Spike snickered before he started to snarl and make intimidating faces in the mirror.
Meanwhile, Twilight was sitting at the central table of her library, Rainbow Dash flying right above her, peering down with a prideful smile. After all, she did basically save the day for her two friends. She turned her across the room, where Spike was standing in front of her full-body length mirror, still making what he thought were “intimidating faces”, which in reality were just silly. Twilight couldn’t help but chuckle at her friend’s behavior.
“You know, just because your eyes are red, doesn’t mean you look evil.” Twilight called out. “If anything you look less intimidating than you did before. You look hilarious.”
Spike stopped making the faces and groaned. “Thank you Mare Buzzkill.”
Twilight snickered and turned her attention down to the tube of toothpaste in her hooves.
.
“Phew, so glad that whole ordeal is over.” Twilight said, rubbing her still sore eyes. “I can’t thank you enough for helping us Rainbow. We owe you one.”
“Pfft, it was nothing.” Rainbow Dash said with a soft chuckle. “Listen, if you and Spike ever need a source of running water, just ask and I’ll get a cloud for you.”
Twilight looked up at her friend and smiled, “Thanks. You’re a great friend.”
Rainbow Dash blushed before giving her purple friend a small nod. She then looked over at the tube of toothpaste, still laying out on the table-top, and pointed at it. “So, what are you gonna do with that? Are you still gonna use it?”
Twilight shook her head, “No. That was too painful of an experience to re-live. I’ll just stop by Colgate’s place tomorrow and pick up some new toothpaste. Hopefully she’ll have some more by then.”
“I could get you some of my toothpaste from home, if you want.” Rainbow Dash suggested. “As long as you don’t mind using ‘Daring Do’ or ‘Wonderbolts’ brands.”
“That would be great.” Twilight said with a soft chuckle, appreciative for Rainbow Dash’s display of generosity. She turned to her cyan friend and held out the toothpaste, “Could you please dispose of this?”
Grinning, the pegasus took the tube of toothpaste and flew towards the door. She swung it open and reached back before throwing it outside with all of her might, sending it soaring into the distance with a small, rainbow tail coming off the back of it. Brushing her hooves together with the most satisfied grin on her face, she closed the door and flew back over to Twilight.
“Don’t you think throwing it in the trash would have been better?”
Rainbow Dash scoffed, “Now what fun would that have been?”
“But what if somepony else finds it?” Twilight asked, some worry in her voice.
“They’d probably leave it be.” Rainbow Dash snickered. “Trust me, nopony with any amount of common sense would use a stray tube of toothpaste they found on the ground.”
On the outskirts of town, the blonde-maned, grey pegasus with crossed eyes known as Derpy flew along, whistling a cheerful tune. She had a brown mailbag on her back, unclipped and stuffed with everything from sincere letters of romance to junk mail.
She reached a mailbox and reached into her saddle-bag, pulling out a thin letter. But before she could put it inside, something landed on the ground at her hooves. The mare leapt into the air, startled by the strange, falling object.
“Alien invasion! Hit the deck!” Derpy dove into a nearby bush, hooves over her head and shaking like a leaf as she prepared for fire to rain down from above. But when nothing dramatic happened, she slowly stuck her head out of the ground to see that there was nothing to be afraid off. Sighing, she stood back up.
“Come on, Derpy, pull yourself together.” The mare said to herself, bonking her hooves against her head a couple of times. “There’s no such thing as aliens, remember. You can’t let every odd noise scare you, most ponies in this town already think you’re strange.”
She saw the letter that she was about to put into the mailbox laying on the ground. She trotted over and picked up the letter, only to stop at the sight of what was hidden underneath. There, laying in the grass, was a familiar tube of toothpaste, some rainbow-colored steam coming out the back of it like a freshly-fired bullet. A wide-eyed Derpy slowly reached out and picked up the tube of toothpaste. Opening the cap on the tube, she squirted the now-loosened paste onto her hoof before licking it. A minty taste met her tongue, sending spikes of pleasure throughout her mouth. A grin slowly made its way onto her face as she held up the tube in triumph.
“Ha-ha! I knew aliens existed! Everypony said I was wrong, that I was crazy. But now I have the proof! Alien jelly!” Derpy squirted some more of the paste into her waiting mouth. She put the letter into the mailbox and closed it before flying off, even happier than she was before.
“I can’t wait to see how it tastes on a muffin!”