> Wings Of Vigor > by Golden Fang Ryu Shenron > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- > Wings Of Vigor > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- “Endurance is one of the most difficult disciplines. But it is to the one who endures that the final victory comes.” – Gautama Buddha Moonlight shined through the window of my home as I sat in the reclining chair at the back of my living room. It bathed me in its ethereal luminosity, preventing any shadows from submerging me in their ponds of darkness. In my furniture, I lounged – a book resting on my patellas – letting my mane cushion my head and shoulders. My hoof went to lift the page I was reading and moved it along. It did so with a schliff as it rested on the other side of the book. It didn’t break my concentration despite the temporary break in the silence as I was engrossed on the plot. Call Of The Wild was its name – telling the tale of a domestic dog torn between the world of demi-humans and wolves. Beckoned by the call that drew him ever closer to his brethren of the wilderness. It was a good book if I was being honest – tying to genres I loved into a gripping tale. Part of me felt like I was the book's protagonist, following the path that was drawing me in like bees to flowers. It reminded me of what I went through on the one that I’m currently on. And what I obtained – and had taken – along the way. Clopping from the staircase knocked at my ears and broke the concentration I had on the page I was on. I looked over to see a cayuse mare coming down from the second floor. Hugging her body was a nightgown of ebony, concealing her bisque frame, save for her head. Her ruby mane flowed around her neck like a bedroom curtain – hooves taking elegant steps to the bottom. “Evelyne?” My soft voice pulled the mare’s attention in my direction as she reached the Smilidon Estate’s main floor. Her pumpkin orange eyes widened at seeing me after recovering from the scare made at hearing me speak. “Oh, hello Emerald Fang,” Her refined and soothing voice flowed like fresh spring water. “I didn’t expect you to be awake at this hour. I thought you were already in bed.” “I wasn’t feeling like turning in yet, so I decided to stay up for a bit,” I explained, flipping my book over to not lost the page I was on. “What are you doing up anyway? Are you having trouble sleeping?” “I wasn’t… until just a few minutes ago,” Evelyne sighed, hoof pressed against her temple. “I kept feeling this awful numbing in my head. I figured it was only a migraine, but it just wouldn’t cease.” “Headaches, huh? Was Dad suffering the same thing?” “Yes, but the cause was entirely different. He kept it to himself – probably so I wouldn’t be bothered by the noise he was making. I do believe I have a hunch as to what the cause is though.” I gave a soft sigh, sharing the same thoughts even if I didn’t vocalize them. It wasn’t as if I didn’t hold some understanding as to why my father had the habit he did. No trace of it was there before the hit that was given to us. While there was improvement since it first began, it didn’t make me any less upset hearing it – and not because it was an annoyance. “Must be from the alcohol he had earlier,” I murmured. “Honesty, I will never understand the appeal behind the habit of drinking. I’m glad he isn’t doing it as much anymore, but I prefer if he stopped entirely. Is Dad looking to destroy his liver or something?” “I’ve asked that question so many times, dear. I doubt I will ever find an answer,” Evelyne replied, walking over and sitting on the sofa next to me. “Given what today was however, it's not that I don't understand why. I only hope your brother doesn’t pick up such a habit. Epona knows I already have enough trouble managing one drinker.” “Knowing Silentium, I’d say that possibility is zero,” I reassured. “Then again, with how similar they are… it's better to be safe than sorry.” “Indeed,” Evelyne agreed, pulling a strand of her mane back. “I couldn’t help noticing you were reading when I arrived. Were you doing it to pass the time?” “Something like that," I confirmed. "I figured tonight would be when I would get back to this book in particular.” “…It wouldn’t happen to be another nature novel, would it?” “Do I even need to confirm it?” My blunt questioning prompted a laugh from my stepmother, causing me to snort in response. It was one I heard many times before – telling me of the humor she found in my indulging in what I loved since I was six. It never bothered me. Evelyne never made fun of me or put me down for this interest of mine – choosing instead to give her support in it. Something I always loved about her. “That’s a yes if I’ve ever heard of one,” Evelyne giggled once she settled down. “Are you enjoying your book?” “More than I thought,” I said, lifting it up to show her the title – and wolf – that embedded on the front. “I’m still on the first one but I’m almost through it since it’s shorter than the second. It’s the same one I decided to get for Hearth’s Warming in case you were wondering.” "Yes, you did mention something along those lines,” Evelyne said, tilting her head like a kitten inspecting a new toy. “What do you like most about it?” “How alike me and the protagonist are,” I explained. “He’s experiencing a dark road, but he keeps going no matter how bad it gets. He just endured trial after trial and never wavered even when it seemed like he was at the end of his rope. He reminds me of myself in that way… and what I set out to do.” Evelyne paused at the end of my explanation like she wasn’t expecting the last statement. In some way, she knew what I was meant even if I didn’t say it. My father would too if he were here with her. Even my younger brother – Silent Storm – would understand true meaning from my words if anyone were to ask him. It was the reason I was on the path I am now. The path I would continue to walk down until my last breath. “Is that so? He must be quite a complex character to connect with him in such a way,” Evelyne said after regaining her bearings. “I just hope he won’t keep you from your shuteye. One does need a proper amount to function while awake.” “I haven’t had any proper sleep in almost half a decade. What’s the point in telling me that now?” “Just some advice from a loving stepmother to her dear stepson who wants nothing more than to see him fit and healthy. Silentium is enough of a night owl as it is. It would break my heart to see you take a similar path.” I sighed again as I closed my eyes. “…I know. I can’t make promises on keeping a set sleep schedule, but I’ll do what I can.” “That’s all I ask,” Evelyne said sweetly, nodding in satisfaction. “Well then, I will leave you to your reading. I will be in the kitchen if you are in need my assistance.” “Sure thing,” I said as she went in the direction of my kitchen. “And… Eve?” She stopped at hearing me say her nickname. The same one I hadn’t used since I was sixteen. “Yes?” “If you decide to check up on me again and I’m not here or in my room, just know I decided to go there,” I put deep emphasis at the end. “You can tell Storm and Dad the same thing if they do too. They’ll know.” My stepmother’s eyes widened ever so slightly at my word of warning. She stood there as if trying to process it despite understanding what I was saying. Another smile – more doleful than the last – spread across her muzzle before she gave her response. “I understand,” The slightest crack entered her voice as she spoke. “I’ll be sure to tell them if they go in search of you. If you do decide to go there, be careful. A-and… tell Natura… I said hello.” I gave no response to her request. I didn’t need to, for the look inside my viridescent orbs conveyed she could rely on me to uphold it. Evelyne then turned away, heading to the kitchen at a pace a bit too fast for someone who was just planning to make tea. I resumed reading as soon as she was gone, intent on completing one more chapter when I felt… it. It was a faint feeling. Just a slight pang anyone would’ve passed off as a jab in the head for being awake for too long. I knew better. It was a sense I had an unfortunate familiarity with. A sign that I learned to focus on since I was seven. One I never forgot since that night – and won’t ever forget for the nights and days to come. Signs of Feralins. Marking the page I was one, I set my book down on my chair and rose to my hooves. I made my way upstairs, taking care not to alert the cayuse on the other side of my estate. I went down the hall before going into my room, heading for the window next to by bed. I stared ahead, paying no mind to hairs standing on my sepia pelt. My wings bristled as I pinpointed the source of the otherworldly magic trickling into my psyche. ‘Looks like I won’t be getting any sleep tonight.’ I didn’t bother to tell Evelyne what I detected as she more than likely felt it herself. If Silent Storm and Dad were awake, they would know what they needed to thanks to that same presence. It left me with undivided time to equip myself with the weapons I would need for what I would do. I did take notice of the concealment cloak laying on one of my chairs on my way out – my stepmother’s scent lingering. I didn’t think on it for long and took it with me, self-noting to thank the cayuse for her generosity. No sooner was I armed was I exiting my front door and trotting down the streets of my city home of Nirvana. I didn’t fly or run as I wanted to conserve my energy until it was needed against what I was pursuing. I didn’t know how many there were, what type they happened to be, or even their levels of strength. Each possibility was kept in mind as I drew ever so closer to what awaited me. Wild vegetation came into view by the time I reached one of my home’s four borders – a waterless gulley with a bridge leading into Forest of Foxen. It was one I crossed many times on the road I’d chosen to walk down. It never felt the same as it used to be, for on the other side hid my greatest regret. The regret that pushed me to go down this path. The regret that will follow me for the rest of my days. The regret I must fight to ensure never happens again. Exhaling deeply, I crossed the bridge into the megaflora, allowing it to swallow me in its rich greenery like a snake would a mouse. I then took notice of its quietness and the stillness of the air. It wasn’t something I was unfamiliar with having played in it plenty of times as a colt. What drew my focus to it was how unnatural it felt – to where not even the animals were heard or seen. It let me know I was on the right direction and what I would face would soon be put to sleep. Specks of light poked at my eyes like lingering pollen, prompting me to look ahead and see a gap in the brush and branches. I realized where it was coming from and felt a pull at my heart as if it hooked by a line from a fishing pole. I moved towards it, watching as the light grew brighter until I was in front of its source. Underneath the gleaming sphere galactic rock, a treehouse stood, towering over the field of grass that spanned across the unwooded patch. Leaves sprouted from it like gumdrops on a muffin house as a latter hung from where the entrance was. A pond sat between it and me, its liquid reflecting the nocturnal light off its surface. If I were anyone else, I would have been confused as to what it would be doing here. I wasn’t such a person for I knew the owner – the one who was looking at it like it was a second home. This was for good reason thanks to the statue standing tall and proud in front of the treeless haven. My face was as still as a stone as I stared at it, feeling the figure return the stare as if welcoming me back from a long trip. I didn’t look away even for a moment. Not when I entered this paradise I hardly ventured into anymore. Or as I crossed the pond that seemed to push me to the treehouse as if to guide me to safety. Even as my expression became more contorted, I never once broke eye contact until I was directly in front of the statue. Only then did I look down at the words engraved in the granite. Here lies Natalie Actaeon Theofylaktos Wife of Theodore Theofylaktos Mother of Ethan Actaeon Theofylaktos Stepmother of Silentium Thérèse Theofylaktos May she Rest In Peace in the Fields of Elysium In the Holy Embrace of our Mother Epona It was only six pieces of writing – something that could be read in under a minute. Yet to me, each word was like claws digging in my chest with the intent of exposing my broken heart. I was shaking by the end, incisors stabbing my lip to where I could feel my life fluids dripping down my chin. My neck muscles let go of the control it had over my head, allowing my emerald and obsidian mane to cover my blurring eyes. Four years. Four years since my world changed. The day the old me died and the new me replaced him. It was a day that haunted me even not at a time when I should have most past it. But how is it that anyone can move on from what I went through? How could anyone even begin to start? I often had people mention how amazing I was. How strong I had to have been to endure the pain and keep going. That somehow – someway – I was able to put what happened behind me for the sake of my mother. But they were wrong. I didn’t move and I didn’t put it behind either. And I doubt I ever will… if that time ever came. I gulped down the lump inside my throat as I inhaled, feeling air rush into my lungs like a gust of wind. I let it out as I blinked away the liquid fighting to escape from my eyelids. I wanted to cry – to do nothing more than let myself be blanketed by the grass and sob my anguish out. I knew that I had no reason to, for I was not to blame for my family’s tragedy. A fact that did nothing to erase the weeds of guilt entangling my soul. It had to have been at least two minutes before I tamed my emotions. I stood where was, ensuring I was stable enough before looking at the statue again. For the briefest moment, I saw a beautiful unicorn mare in its place smiling at me. Our matching irises met, her pupils eyeing me with a look of love only a parent could’ve conjured up. As fast as the time I blinked at her, she vanished, letting the statue take her place. ‘Wings of Epona I’m out of it,’ I thought with a smile bitterer than hospital medicine. ‘First I almost breakdown at seeing my mother’s grave and now I’m having hallucinations of her? I guess that birthday anniversary event messed with me more than I thought.’ The thirty-first day of the first month - the day that my mother’s life took its ironically tragic turn. We were bushwalking in the Foxen Forest as my reliable way of helping her conclude her fortieth trip around the sun. I was so carefree and ignorant of the events that would soon take place. If I had any worries or fears, my mother made sure where were none. At least until it was too late. It happened so fast. Neither of us saw it coming. Mom and I were relaxing within the safety of the forest and the jaws of death were upon is before we knew it. Everything was recalled as vividly as the saber-tooth cutie marks on my flanks. Magic heavier than blocks of ice. Sounds of creatures not of this realm. Lifeblood burning my nasal cavities with its scent. Echoing neighs as I hugged my mother’s lifeless form. If someone were to ask me of the most traumatic period of my life, it would be this. It is one thing to hear one go through such an event. It’s another to experience it yourself. No words can be used to explain what it does to you. How it stays with you. The way it changes you into something you’d never think you would become. It was how it was for me when my mother left us. Left me and Dad. Evelyne. Silentium. It was partly for this reason why I do this. Why I chose the occupation I did, to reduce the changes of anyone experiencing what I had. A task I’d commit to – regardless of setbacks – until the feralins were no more. In the midst of me clearing my mind of the macabre images, I felt the same throb. It helped me in shifting my attention from my reminiscing to the beings trudging through the thicket. With every snap, my ears shifted back. With every growl my insides churned, overrun by the pain I felt for the creatures emerging to face me. You would think I hated the feralins for what they took from me, and that I wanted to extract my vengeance against them. They would be right in some way, but wrong in the other. I held no hate for the feralins, and part of me did want to avenge my mother’s death. Yet that only represented another portion of my reasoning for hunting them. The other… was that I also see them as victims. Just like the ones they preyed upon. I was aware of the threat the feralins presented - not just to Nirvana but to Sverre as a whole. An omen on the island that would spread death and destruction until nothing was left. Despite that, I did not see them as monsters. Behind those ivory masks, I saw pain, emptiness and desperation mixed with the hungry cries that always alarmed me of their whereabouts. It was like they were asking – begging for something or someone to release them from the chains binding them. Something their endless hunting of the Sverrenians could not provide. It was these ternaries that made up my cause to eradicate them. If I didn't do it, who would? Shifting my stance, I adjusted the coal stetson on my head as I stared at the five feralins standing before me. Each were in forms of the main antagonist from Red Riding Hoof, one of many the feralins were known to take. They growled at my presence as if displeased I was here – no doubt because of the ones in control of them. My tail tuff shook like a rattler’s as my head lowered, locking gazes with their candle lights for optics. Barking from the lead feralin signaled its decision to attack, and I responded in kind. While quicker than me, I was able to evade its attempt to chomp down on my face. While it was in midair, I took out a dagger and slashed it from its hip to the side of its neck. A whine left the feralin’s mouth as it hit the earth, blood spreading across its pelage. Paws smacking against the dirt signaled the second feralin coming from next to me. I opened my wings and let them lift me in the air, feeling its teeth snap at my pedal bone. Another dagger flew from me and hit the beast in its shoulder, eliciting a yelp as it staggered from pain. None of its vitals were hit, but it would need time to recuperate. Having witnessed the efficiency in which their packmates were taken down, the feralins chose to resort to more effective tactics. Two of them leapt at me at the same time I launched myself at them using my treehouse’s branches. Thuds were heard as my hooves hit their heads, sending them spiraling into the grass. I skidded to a halt as I landed, taking wonder of the fifth feralin’s lack of presence. I didn’t have to wait for long. Pain searing through my calcaneus let me know of the whereabouts of the last feralin. I didn’t get time to defend myself as I was swung around and back at its pack. Feathers went flying as I went tumbling and sliding, dirt and plant life sticking to my cloak. I forced myself to my feet, letting the bitten leg hang like a spider monkey from its tail. Snarling alerted me to danger, and I felt a feralin bite the back of my neck and force my head down. While it had a firm grip, the thickness from my cloak and mane helped with dampening the blow, allowing me to retaliate. I bucked and thrashed, feeling the feralin’s claws rake my legs and flanks trying to hang on. I then resorted to a forward flip, hitting the ground with the canine’s back being the first to make contact. The impact help to make part its jaws and let me escape, leaving me to bear another wound. As I was recovering from the near-death strike, I noticed movement from the corner of my left eye and saw a feralin galloping in. I had just enough time to lift me head before my shoulder was hit, sending us both rolling. Crunching was heard as my left scapula was cracked, pushing me to shove the wolf off of me to prevent further damage. With my unhurt legs, I lifted myself up to take flight back to my treehouse. Seconds in my evasion of my enemies, the first feralin came at me from my other side. I was ready for this one and grabbed its neck to spin us around so I would be the pinner. It didn’t stop it from grabbing my throat and roll us over. Instead of repeating my move, it chose instead to throw me away from it, just feet away from my original spot. My hooves felt my throat for punctures on it, and I was relieved to find there were none. Growling from in front of me pulled me out of my inspection of a death blow to the feralins slowly making their way towards me. My bloodied right hindleg and left shoulder shouted from the pain from my movements as I forced myself up. Through my blurring vision, I could see looks of triumph swim in their eyes – undoubtedly from supposed their victory. It was only for a second, but I could see in their place a normal family of wolves, just like those in my city’s wilderness. Dangerous as they were to life – both sapient and otherwise – I couldn’t help but empathize with them. Not just for the creatures they used to be, but for ones that possessed them. No doubt they were like these wolves before becoming what they were, living however one does on the island of Sverre. Lives that they more than likely have no memories of due to losing their own and becoming what they were. Lives they could not hold onto. Lives they could no longer retain. Lives I hoped they would find again. Seeing I was not putting up any resistance, the feralins prepared to finish what they fought tooth and nail to accomplish. It was stopped at seeing the verdant cloth concealing me slide off and fall to my hooves. My talent marks began to glow green as my irises brightened, a soft aura enveloping me as I parted my wings. Unnerved by the appearance of my magic, the feralins began backing away, ears flattening and tails tucking. Their fear increased at hearing a tigerish growl rumble in my throat and seeing my teeth elongate and sharpen. Stripes were the last thing they saw before I raced at them, prompting them to do the same. It would be some time before the Foxen Forest went silent again. I wasn’t surprised to find I was being waited on by the time I returned to my home. It was a routine that became accustomed to since it first started. I didn’t even need to look to see my stepmother, my father and brother in my living room. Their looks alone told me of the relief and happiness at me being alive despite my injuries. I gave a similar look, ignoring the pain that came from my little brother tackling me in a hug. “Well, if it isn’t the stallion of the house! We wondered when you were going to get back!” “Nice to see you too Dad,” I said to the cyan stallion as his gruff and cheery voice rang. My neck constricted slightly, and I looked down to meet the multicolored gaze of his replica. “You too, Silent Storm.” “That’s quite a lot of blood on you, darling. Are you alright?” Evelyne asked me, hoof raised to her lips. “Other than feeling like my neck, shoulder and leg are on fire? Yes,” Came my blunt response after Silentium released me. “My cloak fared better though.” Dad hummed, smoothing his cumulus locks. “You definitely look like you lost a fight with a wolverine that’s for sure! Looks like it was a little more than you could handle though.” “I think a wolverine would’ve been a better option than what I had to face.” “Yes your… injuries prove that much,” Evelyne agreed, wincing at my injuries as Silentium removed my cloak. “Anyway, are you guys having a tea party or something?” I asked, eyeing the assortment of plates and cups at the living room table. “I thought it was only going to be for Evelyne?” “Oh, there were some slight changes. Your Dad and brother woke up shortly after you left. They weren’t able to go back to sleep and came to me for help, so I gave them my servings.” “I see…” I murmured at her reply, having a hint as to just what it was that disrupted their slumber. “You should try it son! It’ll help you relax so you can stay active during the day!” Dad praised, flexing the muscles on one of his forelegs. “It won’t do you any good if you’re not in top shape! Especially with a job as tough as yours!” “I know… just like the last thousand times you’ve told me,” I sighed, fighting the urge to give an eye roll at his passionate – albeit logical – drive for improvement. “You guys will have to wait for a while for me to join you. I want to get these wounds treated so they won't bother me. Tea can come after that.” “Sure kiddo. Everyone knows here knows how straight you have your priorities,” Dad nodded with an approving smile. “By the way… what else did you do tonight? I know you went to hunt them and all, but I feel like something else went on.” “I… went to see Mom,” I said, looking at the ground. “I know we saw her earlier since… it's the anniversary of her death and all. But... I just… felt like I needed her company.” Silentium and Dad’s looks adorned those of shock as I explained my other reasoning for being out in the Foxen Forest. It wasn’t the total truth, but it wasn’t a complete lie since me and the feralin’s fight was at her grave. Surprise clouded Dad’s eyes during my reply to his question, before it was whisked away in place of a gentle smile. “So… you paid your mother a visit huh? Did you have a nice time?” “It was interrupted due to some… uninvited guests, but it went okay,” I nodded, lifting my head to face Evelyne. “And I also made sure to tell her you said hello Eve – you and Dad. Sorry for not bringing that up earlier.” Evelyne waved her hoof dismissively. “Don’t be. I know you would have done it even without informing us. You always were the reliable type.” ‘Except on that night,’ I retorted in my head as I closed my eyes. “Thank you. I’m glad you feel like you can count on me.” Displaying a smile that could’ve soothed a crying infant, my stepmother turned to my father and gently nudged him. “What do you say Whitehawk?” “Huh? Oh, right… thanks son. It says a lot that you thought about your old stallion,” He said after a second, the sorrowful look in his eyes vanishing. “Sure.” Nudging on my side led to me to look over at Silentium and see him eyeing me expectantly. I was about to ask him what was wrong, only for him to point at my wounds. He then pointed upstairs and back at me, repeating this motion with furrowed fuchsia brows. “Oh, right… you need to patch your wounds,” Evelyne said guiltily. “Silentium, be a dear and help your brother upstairs. I fear we’ve kept him from tending to himself for too long.” Quietly nodding, the colt took my right foreleg and draped it over his muscular neck before guiding me up to the medic room. I grunted at feeling of my wounds reacting to the moment, but I put up with it as to not worry the teenage pegasus. “Be sure to patch yourself up thoroughly Emerald Fang. It wouldn’t be wise to have yourself become infected,” Evelyne continued. “And be sure to do the same while you bathe. Dirt and grime or not things you want to go to sleep with.” “Noted,” I nodded as my brother giggled. “And I’ll make sure it’s not left in the bathtub for when you need to use it. So you don’t have to spend hours over cleaning it.” “You’d better,” Dad said with a chuckle that made my stepmother’s cheeks grow pinker than my brother’s mane. “And Ethan?” My ascension to the second floor was stopped at hearing my birth name. “Yes, Dad?” His azure eyes stared warmly into mine as my head turned to face him. “Thank you… for coming back to us again.” Those words were all I needed to say to freeze where I stood. My eyes grew in size as they shook, looking into the pegasus and cayuse’s as they held me in place with their parental gazes. I forced myself to look away, ignoring the matching look from my brother as we continued up. Just before we vanished from sight, I conveyed my feelings to their thankfulness with one locution. “Always.”