Are You Actually Evil, Or Are You Just Hangry?

by RunicTreetops

First published

Princess Celestia's stress has reached a boiling point, threatening to unleash her inner demons at a moment's notice. Literally. It's now your responsibility to prevent that from happening. Lucky you!

Princess Celestia has long been aware of the existence of Daybreaker, a version of herself powered by fear, anger, and stress. Thankfully, Daybreaker only exists in her nightmares. At least, that's what she had hoped. In truth, with the mounting pressures being put upon her in an ever-advancing society, she has become acutely aware of the very real possibility that Daybreaker may one day overtake her. Now, it's up to you, her loving husband, to ensure that this does not come to pass.

...Well, good luck with that.

Requested by Ladon.

Are You Actually Evil, Or Are You Just Hangry?

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Sitting quietly in the corner of a small Canterlot Castle study, you briefly glance up from your book towards the desk near the back of the room. Sitting there, with her head resting on her hoof, is Princess Celestia. Celestia is kind of a big deal. She's the ruler of Equestria. She's in charge of raising the sun. She runs a school for gifted unicorns. Also, she's your wife.

In spite of that, you don't actually have any sort of political power. Even if marrying into royalty DID give you some sort of sway over the country, it became pretty clear that the pony populous of Equestria was a little leery about the nation's only human being so close to the princess in the first place, so you likely wouldn't have gotten much done. That's fine by you, though. Politics were never really your thing. You and Celestia got married because, well, you love each other. Is there a better reason to get married than that?

But as the two of you sit quietly in this study, you reflect on the past couple of weeks. It's been... turbulent, to say the least. To start, the Crystal Empire is experiencing a bit of a famine. It's not like anypony is dying, but a blight practically wiped out all of their locally grown crops for the summer, meaning that the crystal ponies there need to import most of their food from Equestria. Obviously, Equestria is more than happy to do so, but actually getting that going was a logistical nightmare and days of paperwork for Tia. Then, pretty much right after that, the EEA started enforcing new regulations on Princess Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns in response to recent events surrounding Princess Twilight's School of Friendship. Again, that was a whole lot of negotiating and paperwork for Tia to take care of, not to mention her having to rewrite half of the darn curriculum. Many such issues have continued to occur this week as well, and to top it all off, the coffee machine broke! Oh, the horror!

Now, most ponies wouldn't believe this, but Tia isn't as well put-together as you might think. She DOES have several thousand years of experience, and she is good at keeping a level head, but to say that she never gets stressed or overwhelmed would be ridiculous. After all, at the end of the day, she's just another pony. Unfortunately, some recent events involving Starlight Glimmer, Princess Luna, and a spell for switching cutie marks brought some... uncomfortable truths to light.

A little over 1000 years ago, Celestia's sister, Princess Luna, was overtaken by jealousy at the adoration Tia received. This jealousy ultimately led to her losing her sense of self, becoming the powerful and cruel Nightmare Moon. After a fierce battle, Tia was forced to banish Nightmare Moon to the moon for 1000 years. Of course, this all turned out okay in the end, what with Twilight Sparkle and her friends using the 'power of friendship' or whatever, but the conflict left some scars that still linger to this day, particularly for the princesses themselves. However, Tia fears that history may soon repeat itself. But it won't be Luna losing control of her emotions.

It will be Celestia.

As the years have gone on, Tia's stress has only continued to mount. Twilight's ascension to princesshood and the return of Luna certainly helped her out quite a bit, but even they can only do so much in a world that is quickly modernizing and constantly demanding more and more from her. Eventually, she will reach a breaking point. And when she does, the horrendous nightmare that she witnessed alongside Starlight and Luna, in which she transformed into the malevolent and nigh-unstoppable Daybreaker, could very well become reality.

Thus, she has tasked you with the teeny-tiny itty-bitty responsibility of making sure that she doesn't go crazy and start destroying Equestria. Fun!

Thus, as you look over at your lovely wife who is currently using telekinesis to fill out even more paperwork with a scowl on her face, you wonder how you'll be able to keep this up. She wasn't kidding when she told you that she thought she was approaching a boiling point. She seems ready to snap at just about anything lately. You've suggested pretty much every single stress-relieving activity you can think of, but she hardly has time for any of it. Being a princess is hard work, and her strong sense of responsibility certainly isn't helping matters.

Suddenly, you hear a small snapping sound. Immediately afterwards, you hear a frustrated sigh leave Tia's mouth. She closes her eyes as she tries to contain her anger, the newly-snapped quill still in her magical grasp. Without missing a beat, you turn to the small table beside you, upon which sits a finely crafted tea set and a few writing utensils. Quickly gathering what you need, you make your way to her only a couple of seconds after the tip of her quill broke off. She doesn't even register your presence until you grab the broken quill from her and place a fresh one in front of her. As she looks up at you, she notices that you're preparing her a small cup of tea. Lemon and four sugars, just the way she likes it. The (almost literal) fire in her eyes dies as she gives you a small, yet genuine smile. Taking the tea from you, she takes a sip and nods, and you smile back at her before returning to your seat. This is far from the first time this has happened. She has a tendency to press down on the parchment a bit too hard when she's stressed, after all, so this little song and dance is nothing new to either of you. There's no need for words. You both understand your current circumstances, and you have a silent, mutual respect for each other.

...That said, just how long are you going to have to keep doing this?


A few hours later, after having left the study for a little bit to prepare for the evening, you return to the quiet room just in time to see Tia sigh and set down her quill. She leans back in her chair and stretches her neck, closing her eyes as she does so. When she opens them again, she locks her magenta eyes with yours, and you offer a gentle smile. She returns it, rising from her desk for the first time since early in the afternoon. She moves to grab the stack of parchment that she had piling up, but you stop her before she can do so.

"Come on Tia, let me take those for you, you've done enough as-is."

"I really shouldn't shirk my duties, sunshine."

"Come on, I doubt anypony will care who turns the papers in. I'll bring these over to Ms. Inkwell. You go turn in for the night, okay? I've already drawn a bath for you."

"Oh, dearest, there was really no need for that."

"Hey, you tasked me with taking care of you, sunbutt. I offer only the best for my favorite mare."

With a tired smile and a slight chuckle, she walks past you, giving you a quick peck on the cheek as she does so.

"Very well, then. I suppose some self-care is in order. I'll see you in a bit, okay?"

With that, she slowly makes her way out of the room and towards your shared quarters. As the door closes, you let out a sigh of your own. She seems to be doing okay for now, so that's good. Meanwhile, you need to get these documents to Raven Inkwell. That shouldn't take too long.

...

Okay well that took forever. It took you the better part of an hour to track her down. Turns out, the staff in charge of doing the laundry had a major problem, much bigger than the typical "oopsie-daisies" that are typical of the twins in charge of doing it. What were their names? Felicia and Flora, or something? Eh, whatever. Long story short, about half of the castle's laundry didn't get washed and there is a long, long list of items waiting to be cleaned. You, of course, can do little about it. But there is one thing you can do.

And that's keep Tia from finding out.

Thankfully, it seems that the issue will be resolved by morning. So long as you can get Tia in bed soon, you should be fine. Plus, you did find Ms. Inkwell eventually, and she happily took those documents off of your hands. Also, she was willing to take care of an unrelated favor you needed to ask of her, so all's well that ends well, right?


Opening the door to your quarters, your eyes immediately go wide at the strange sight. Standing near the side of the room, just outside of the door to the connected bathroom, is your lovely wife, covered head to hoof in water. Her usually flowing mane is sopping wet, drooping all over her face and onto the floor. You aren't even sure if she can see, as her damp mane is covering her eyes. Her normally snow-white coat appears more gray and soggy, and her expression seems to be that of complete indifference. To top it all off, she's shivering quite profusely.

"T-Tia? What happened to you?"

"Well, I partook in the bath that you so thoughtfully prepared for me. Unfortunately, there were a distinct lack of towels in the bathroom." Oh dear. Maybe that whole laundry business was a bigger problem than you had anticipated. "Ordinarily I could just use a spell to speed up the drying process, but I am afraid that I'm a bit too tired for that after today's business. So, drip drying it is."

"Aren't you cold?"

She turns her head just a bit to look directly at you. You can't see her eyes, but frankly, you're thankful for that judging by the extremely menacing energy coming off of her.

"Yes."

...Gulp.

"W-well, is there anything I can do for you?"

"...Fetch me a towel?"

"Ahahaha, yeahhhhhh, about that..."

You're going to die, aren't you?


You lay in the large, comfortable bed, staring up at the ceiling all the while. Between it being the middle of summer and the Princess of the Sun sleeping just inches away from you, it's awfully warm in here. You turn your head to look at your sleeping wife. She didn't take the news about the laundry very well and she seemed very, very close to exploding for a moment there, but between the proper delivery of her paperwork and some well-timed ear scritches on your part, you were able to get her to calm down. After that, she decided that she had been through enough for one day and headed off to bed. You were quick to follow.

You're barely awake at the moment. While you obviously can't compare to how she must be feeling right now, you're also downright exhausted. You've basically been acting as her around-the-clock babysitter, fearing what would essentially be capital punishment should you fail to take care of her properly. And it's not that you don't want to help her. She's your wife, after all. But... man, you're tired.

You take a closer look at her sleeping face. To be honest, she's a bit of a terrible sleeper. You would love to talk about how peaceful she looks or make a "sleeping beauty" joke or whatever, but the truth is that she tends to toss and turn all night, snoring loudly all the while. Yet, she'll wake up in the morning and claim that it was the best sleep of her life. In its own way, that too is kind of adorable. You smile to yourself. It may be difficult to keep Tia safe from herself, but... it's all worth it.

"...Ow!"

In a quick motion she rolled over, flinging one of her hooves around as she did so and smacking you in the face in the process. You let out a small yelp, which wakes her up. She shoots into an upright position, looking around frantically.

"Sunshine? Did something happen?"

"N-no, Tia, everything's fine. You can go back to sleep."

With a groan, she rubs at her temple. She shakes her head a little bit, and a small grumbling sound rings out.

"...I have a headache."

"I'm sorry to hear that, Tia. Do you want any medicine, or-"

"No! No, I'm... fine..."

"...You don't sound very fine."

"Well, that's probably because I'm not fine, isn't it?!"

"W-wha... I... you just said-"

"How could I possibly be fine?! Everything is going wrong all of the time! Nopony listens to me anymore! They expect me to just get up, raise the sun, listen to them moan and complain about the silliest little mundane things, do all of the actually important paperwork all day, and then be all bright and chipper as if nothing is happening! I've been doing this job for thousands of years, Anon! It wasn't always like this! I used to get RESPECT for what I do!"

"Tia? Everypony respects you. They trust you to be able to get the job done right. That's why-"

"I DON'T CARE!"

Without giving you any time to react, she slams her front hooves down onto the bed. A booming sound rings out throughout the room. As if an explosion had occurred right next to you, you are thrown backwards a good ten feet onto the floor. Quickly scrambling to your feet, you notice the room quickly becoming brighter. Forcing yourself to look at the obvious culprit, you look on in horror at Tia, who is briefly enveloped in a white light before emerging once more. Only, that isn't Celestia.

Before you stands a large mare, about the same size as Tia. Her coat is white, just like Tia's, and her cutie mark is extremely similar. In fact, it's identical except for the fact that there is an extra layer to the sun that makes it look much larger, almost like it's exploding. Her eyes are a bright orange, with the sclera looking to be a dark orange-brown. Her horn and wings are both large, easily rivaling those of Tia, but what is most striking about her is her mane and tail, which look to be made of fire. In fact, you're positive that they ARE made of fire, seeing as how the room is quickly growing very hot and the bed that she is standing on has also caught on fire. There can be no doubt.

Daybreaker has finally arrived.

You cannot help but anxiously shiver as her eyes lock onto you, her head tilting back ever so slightly to give herself a look of superiority. Between that and the height advantage granted to her by the quickly burning bed, she is a thoroughly intimidating mare, a feeling made even stronger as the room grows hotter and hotter. Her mouth curls into a wicked grin, and as she begins to speak, her voice gives you chills.

"Come now sunshine, what are you so afraid of~?"

"T-Tia?"

"Oh darling, you know better than that. It's me, Daybreaker! Your wife! Your queen~" You take a couple of steps back, your widened eyes quickly drying out due to the sheer intensity of the heat pouring off of Daybreaker. As if to mock you, she takes a step off of the bed, following you slowly and teasingly. "There's no need to be like that! You know as well as I that Equestria desperately needs to undergo some changes, but I would never hurt you~"

"W-what kind of changes?"

You're fairly certain you know what she's going to say, but you're mostly just trying to keep her occupied while you think of a way out of this. You had planned for a lot of different possibilities, but you hadn't expected her to actually become Daybreaker, at least not this soon! Where's Twilight when you need her?

"Common sense changes, really. For one thing, these little ponies shall be made to show me the respect I deserve. After that... I suppose some renovations are in order. It's awfully chilly around here, don't you think?"

It was hot BEFORE she set the darn room on fire!

"A-and what about me?"

"What about you? Why, you'll be my king, of course! After all, I'm not the only one these pathetic subjects of mine have been disrespecting, now am I?"

What is she trying to do? Is she trying to get you to let your guard down, or is that Tia's real personality shining through? You know she was mad about how much prejudice you faced after marrying into the royal family, but enough for her to be thinking about that after turning evil?

Is it bad that you're starting to love your wife even more now? Bad time?

You feel your back hit the wall. The door is right next to you. If you so wanted, you could probably distract her with something and make a break for it. But... what would she do then? You CAN'T let her leave this room. Even if you were able to get her back to normal, do you want her to face even more troubles than she already does because of this?

But... what can you do?

Suddenly, there is a knock at the door. You freeze up as Daybreaker's attention is brought to the source of the noise, the cocky grin leaving her face. Dang it, why now of all times? Who could possibly be knocking on Princess Celestia's door at this time of night?!

Wait a minute.

Thinking fast, you gasp as you turn your attention to a nearby window, prompting Daybreaker to do the same. Moving as swiftly as you can, you open the door just a crack, confirming your suspicions. Behind the door stands Raven Inkwell with a small platter on one hoof, looking at you with a very confused expression on her face. That's understandable, considering that the growing fire in the room is likely causing light to pour through the crack underneath the door.

"ThankyouMissInkwellhaveagoodnight!"

Quickly grabbing the platter and slamming the door shut once more, you feel the heat suddenly become almost unbearable. Turning your head, you see Daybreaker standing just feet from you, glaring daggers into you.

"And who, exactly, was that?"

"Th-that was just Ms. Inkwell! I asked her to do a favor for me earlier, and she came through!"

Daybreaker leans closer to you, staring intensely at your anxious face. You're sweating quite a bit, but whether that's due to how nervous you are or how hot it is, you aren't certain.

"...Very well. I suppose she can be spared my wrath. She WAS always quite diligent, I suppose." She hesitates for just a moment, and the grumbling sound from earlier rings out again before she turns to look at you once more. "What did you have her do-OOMPH!"

Interrupting her question, you reached for the platter, upon which sits a variety of cupcakes, and shoved one into her still-speaking mouth. If looks could kill, you would have died on the spot, but after a moment, she begins to chew. If there's one weakness Tia has, it's sweets. All you can do now is hope that the same is true for Daybreaker.

After a few very tense seconds, she turns to the platter in your hand before magically taking it from you, helping herself to a few more of those cupcakes. It's actually a bit jarring, seeing the terrifying Daybreaker happily munching down on sweets like that, but you suppose that at the end of the day, it really is Tia in there.

...That might be your out.

"Are you actually evil, or are you just hangry?" With a scowl, her chewing slows as she stares at you. "Come on, Tia. You had a rough day. I get it, I really do. But do you really think this is going to help anyone?" She opens her mouth to speak, but hesitates. You take the opportunity to take a step forward. You can feel your skin start to broil just by being this close to her. Forcing yourself to withstand the pain, you reach out to her face. She doesn't make a move to stop you. Seizing the moment, you reach a bit further and begin scritching right behind her ears. Now finished eating, she happily coos at your touch. You hope she likes it, and you really hope this works, because you are literally sticking your hand into a raging fire to accomplish this.

After a few seconds, a familiar light envelops Daybreaker once more. The heat in the room gradually begins to subside a bit, and after a few more seconds, you feel your hand scritching not the fiery form of Daybreaker, but the soft and loving form of Celestia.

"S-sunshine?"

"I'm here, Tia."

You lean forward, falling onto your wife. She does her best to catch your, her large form assisting her in that regard. You're about to say something, but the pain from the intense burns you just received finally catch up to you as you lose consciousness.


You awaken in a hospital bed with bandages covering most of your body. Every attempt at movement is rewarded with searing pain. Pretty much the only part of you that isn't covered in bandages is about half of your face. A nurse is seated nearby, and upon noticing that you've awoken, she fills you in on what you missed. Apparently, you successfully brought Tia back from the clutches of Daybreaker, and she has refused to do any of her princess duties until she could speak to you. In the meantime, she has had Twilight and Luna fill in for her.

"Are you sure you want me to let her in? She was the one who did this to you."

"No, no she wasn't. By all means, let her in. I want to see her."

With a nod, the nurse leaves, and a few minutes later, a very concerned-looking Celestia enters the room.

"My sunshine, I... I'm so sorry."

"There's nothing to apologize for, Tia. You just got pushed a little too hard, that's all."

"And I hurt you because of it!"

"Pfft, that wasn't you, that was Daybreaker."

"What is Daybreaker if not an extension of myself?"

"The product of a society that can't respect the boundaries of others, that's what. I don't blame you one bit, dear."

"You can say that all you want, but it's not going to change the fact that you look like a mummy right now."

"Yeah, and I feel like a space heater, too."

"Really, it's a miracle that none of the damage is going to be permanent."

"Heh, that's because the fire inside burned brighter than the fire around me."

"I... what?"

"Don't worry about it. Point being, I'm going to be fine, right? So please, don't worry about it."

"That's not going to happen, sunshine. I... I need to do something. I don't want this to happen again."

You think for a moment. She isn't wrong. If things keep going like this, Daybreaker will almost certainly show up again, and you can't guarantee that you'll survive another encounter with her.

"You know Tia, it might be time to consider retiring."

"Retiring?"

"Yeah, you and Luna have been doing this for thousands of years, right? I think you've long since earned it."

"...Retirement, huh? Heh, and who do you propose we have take our place?"

"Why not Twilight? She seems like she'd be a perfect fit for the job."

"...Twilight. That... might just work. I'll... I'll think about it."

"Just do what you think is best, Tia. Whatever you choose to do, I'll be there to support you."

"I feel bad when you say that covered in injuries that were at least partially my fault."

"Too bad. It'll take more than a few burns to make me stop loving you!"

With a blush, she finally drops that worried tone and lets out an adorable little laugh.

"Oh heavens, sunshine, I don't deserve you."

"I feel the same about you every darn day."

The two of you share a laugh as you begin to discuss what your future is going to look like. It might be an adjustment, but one thing is certain: You aren't going to lose Tia to Daybreaker ever again.















"By the way sunshine, why did you ask Ms. Inkwell to bring cupcakes to our room?"

"You're kind of predictable, Tia. I figured having them on hand would be a nice fail-safe against Daybreaker. I didn't expect the timing to be that convenient, though!"

"...Are you implying I have an addiction to sweets?"

"Well, I'm not not saying that the name "sunbutt" had to come from somewhere! We both know where the first word came from. As for the second~"

"..."

"Hey, maybe we can use this opportunity to buy a bigger bed. I mean, you did burn down the old one, haha!"

"..."

You're a dead man.