Chapter 1 (Rewritten from scratch) - Next time, I will control myself, I promise!

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You know how it is in the post-war wasteland. No laws, and nopony to enforce them. Well, except maybe the occasional hero here and there. They traverse the wasteland doing all the good they can, bringing law and order wherever they can. Helping those who need it. But there's only as much as one or a couple of ponies with guns can do, even with the best intentions. And unfortunately, they are very rare, for the most part ponies just try to survive.

You could say raiders are the exact opposite of that. Murdering psychopaths that, as the name implies, raid settlements that can't protect themselves, with the intention to kill, torture, and destroy as much as they can.

Heroes are loved by ponies living in the wasteland and everywhere else, hence why there are so many stories about them.

raiders on the other hoof are universally hated by everypony. Slavers, Steel Rangers, travelling merchants, salvagers, and every single settlement that had any contact with them ever. Which is why nopony wants to hear any stories about them. Ponies want to hear and read about heroic ponied doing heroic things. Shame, because I love a good story no matter who it is about.

***

"Hey! Assholes, what the fuck do you want?!" I yelled in annoyance at the two of my clan members who were forcefully herding me out of the house I was looting with excited smiles on their faces. "I'm not fucking done there yet!"

"You'll see," said Scythe as he pushed me out of the living room into the connecting hallway whose walls were full of bullet holes, while the other one, Bars, followed him.

'Why is Scythe here? Shouldn't he be planning our next trip or something?' I thought with confusion.

"You've been acting a bit weird lately," said Bars, following Scythe through the door frame. We entered the hallway whose walls were dotted with bullet holes. "We are very worried about you Pensie," He said mockingly like a mother to her foal and chuckled. "The whole clan is! So we just want to check if you still got the thing that makes you an Earchipper."

It must be something serious since the leader was here. It must be that I said I wasn't interested in 'playing' with the prisoners last raid. And the raid before that. I remember how surprised everypony was. "Why do you fucking care huh? It's none of your fucking business!" I shouted as I exited the house. In front of it, in a clearing full of corpses of ponies who naively thought they had a chance to defend this place from us. Shame they don’t give up more often. More prisoners is always nice, bigger stock lasts for longer.

Half of the clan stood in a hoof shape. Around fifteen ponies now to be exact. Before the fight there were more of us, but that’s just the raider's life. You live and have fun one day, and you’re rotting in a ditch the next. Once you accept that, you’ll be fearless. At least that’s what Scythe always says.

Maybe I'm not mature enough for that yet.

In the centre of the gathering, two more raiders had pinned a white mare to the ground, and another three, just next to the hoof shape, guarded a group of the prisoners we'd taken today. Everypony was silent and looked at me. I hate when ponies look at me like that. They’ve got a problem or what?!

"No! Leave her alone! You hear me! Let her go! I’ll do whatever you want!" Screamed some pony from among the prisoners.

I looked at Bars and Scythe "Why do you fucking care? And what is this?" I said more calmly, but still with anger.

"We care because it makes us look bad," Scythe said loudly to make sure he can be heard through the screams. "So, we prepared a little something for you "- he pointed at the thrashing mare in the middle -"she's all yours."

I looked at her, and then at Scythe again

That's it?

"You think I got soft?" I told Scythe calmly.

He shrugged his shoulders and puffed out his lips "Maybe."

And they all think that?

Hell no, I'm not soft, I'm a raider.

I started walking towards the mare. "You gotta fucking understand guys, I know that for some of you, this is beyond comprehension," I said jokingly, looking at my clanmates standing in the circle, " But If you do the same thing over and over again it gets boring, and you need to take a break, right?" They looked at each other and I heard some of them agreeing.

I didn't get soft, I'm gonna show them. But it's fucking frustrating. These idiots, somepony finds a slightly different entertainment other than killing and torturing for a couple of days, and they start thinking you're getting soft. I'm not soft! Maybe I just wanted to open up some of the weird devices we found during the raids to see how they worked? No! They wouldn’t think of that!

I bit my trusty dagger and pulled it out of the pocket on my right hoof, jumped at the mare, between the two raiders pinning her, which made her stop trying to break free, and made her look at me with fear.

Overall she looked and smelled nice, really nice actually, they barely touched her. Only small bruises, no cuts, graceful figure, cute belly, pretty face, and eyes like a puppy dog. Or maybe that's because she was crying but, damn it she's hot. And my little guy thought so too.

"Oy, spweed hew wegs!" I said through the knife as I stood above her and looked at her pretty face.

Immediately my Clan members began cheering happily. And the mare began thrashing and screaming again. I backed away from above her to look between her legs. And good that I did because I noticed something, which almost made my face go sour. Somepony was there before me! Actually, more than one pony, definitely more than one. Eugh, I don't want peeing to burn until I get my hooves on a healing potion, and I doubt it's gonna be worth it.

I spat out my knife, "You just couldn't stop yourself didn't you guys huh?" Everypony started laughing. "I bet it was you Bondie, you fucking animal!" I said while laughing too.

Then she kicked me straight in the muzzle. I fell on my back while massaging my nose with my hooves. Ow my whole fucking muzzle hurt from that. After I checked if there was any blood, I got up as fast as I could. I picked up the knife and jumped over her with a smile.

She calmed down and everypony around me went silent when I pressed the flat side of my dagger against her chest, and rode it over her body while watching it carefully.

Well everypony except for the one screaming stallion, somewhere among other prisoners.

"P-please," She moaned through her tears, which I ignored. At least she's not screaming, that would be annoying.

"Please." She's pretty, it's a shame to ruin such a pretty body.

"Please." Her begging turned almost into a whisper. I shook my head. A real raider doesn't care about things like that.

"Plea-" I felt the ribs with the dagger, and carefully plunged it almost horizontally under them. Bits of blood spattered my face and she started screaming highly. Oh Shut up! I dug around with the knife in her chest, until I finally found her lungs, and her voice died. Finally. Her puppy eyes were wide open, and she began coughing and choking on her own blood. Damn it you bitch! I just cleaned that armour! I pulled the knife out, and quickly stabbed her between her ribs for the heart. Now that will shut her mouth quickly. I'm not gonna torture anypony, in front of everypony like that. Where’s the intimacy in that? I pulled the knife again and tried to wipe it clean using the little yellow gras that was almost everywhere.

"Nooo!" A desperate cry rang from the prisoner group, it lasted a bit, and then faded and turned into crying

Okay, there, I did it, not soft.

I felt my mood improve, and the frustration wash away. Actually, since she's all mine, and I’m dirty with blood anyway… I could have some more fun.

I made one long cut from her sternum almost to the crotch, then smiled, and spread her open with my front hooves. The smell of meat hit me, but it wasn’t so bad. The funny thing is, pony insides usually smell very similar to the outside. She probably wouldn’t taste that bad. Fortunately this time we have enough food for everypony. Seeing me get creative with her made everypony loosen up, and they began freely talking to each other.

"Ey! Why did you let her go so quickly? Should have let her scream for a bit longer!" Soprano Tails complained.

I spat out the knife, "Oy shut up! That's how I like it!" I replied to him.

Then somepony commented about Soprano having daddy issues. In response, Soprano threw himself at them and began beating them with his hooves while they both struggled on the ground. A circle of ponies chanting ‘Fight Fight Fight’ formed around them, and the rest of the gathering began to gradually disperse.

Not paying much attention to it, I began to dig through her guts with my hooves and mouth, which made her jerk with her hooves, as if trying to push me away, but quite blindly, she wasn't even lifting her head anymore to see what’s digging through her insides. "Who wants the heaaaaaart! And somepony start a fire!" I shouted with a light joy in my voice and looked around, which provoked a cheer from everypony around me. I couldn’t smell anything but blood, and I could feel my whole face was caked in it. Which, if you don’t breathe with your nose, is a pleasant feeling,. I bet that’s how a warm bath feels like. I dug my face deeper into her warm insides, held my breath, closed my eyes, and imagined myself swimming in a pool of sweet, scarlet red, warm and sticky blood. Oh that would be heaven. I started to run out of air so I pulled my head out, looked at the white clouds in the sky, and took a deep breath. How many prisoners would a pool like that take?

Four other raiders sat over her next to me, each of them wanting some of her body parts. Alright, then!

Scythe and Bars approached me as I was pulling her intestines out with my sharp teeth. Apologies would be appropriate. I stopped what I was doing, got up and looked at them waiting for them to speak.

"Fuck, maybe I'll start pretending to get soft too to get a pretty mare all for myself," Bars said while nodding towards the mare.

"Good to know you're still you. We were starting to worry, about you too of course," He said with an ironic smile, "You know how it is, if anypony finds out that the Earchipper clan doesn’t want to kill, ponies might get cocky. We have to take care of our reputation as raiders."

"Ye, I get it."

"That's good." He patted my back and walked away. "Have fun."

"I'll kill you, you hear me!" The prisoner stallion began shouting again, but hoarsely, "I will kill you!"

Honestly, I forgot how fun playing with the prisoners can be, you just have to be in the right mood. Or it's because I took a short break from it, who knows?

"Ey Bars, come on, I just got a great idea!" I told Bars with excitement, Bars smiled. "Okay, this is what we're gonna do with her…"

***

The village proved to be a great target for an attack, we found plenty of food, places to sleep, and most important - Alcohol. It got dark, the fires were cracking, and raiders were talking, drinking, and burning everything that was flammable. Houses, wooden furniture, floorboards, bodies, everything. That settlement was in for a major rearrangement. And is gonna be unrecognisable probably by tomorrow. Everypony was happy. They had prisoners to play with, a place to sleep, and the air was filled with screams and wails of ponies. Perfect time to sneak out.

I remember we bumped into some abandoned caravans on the way to this settlement, or farm, or whatever this is before we got here. The merchants must have noticed us and fled, but they were going somewhere. I'm pretty sure there’s some kind of settlement near in the direction they were going.

I want to go there. I’ve got to remind myself why I have to stay strong.

I put on my black coat I got two raids ago, my face would be too visible with my yellowish green coat so I carefully smeared it with charcoal, cautious not to pull any of my piercings in the face or ears, put a hood on my cut-up ears, and got moving.

I walked toward the edge of the clearing the settlement was built on. The entire clearing was dotted with numerous fireplaces, and around every one of them was a group of raiders ‘playing’ with one of the prisoners. If I wanted to sneak out unnoticed, I’ll have to avoid getting too close to them so none of my comrades would see me leave.

On my way to the forest, I passed a campfire where Soprano Tails, accompanied by a few other raiders, was slowly cutting some prisoner’s skin with a cleaver he held in his mouth, stopping every once in a while to hear them beg and wail in pain. It always made him smile.

I’m not gonna lie, I like games that give you a feeling of power too from time to time, but he is obsessed with them, and never wants to play anything else. I wonder what he’s compensating for.

I passed them and kept walking. Around twenty metres from them I saw Gaag, Bars and two others playing tug of war, but at the centre of the rope was a foal, and in the middle between the teams was a fire. I could hardly hear his screams because of the opposing teams making so much commotion motivating each other to keep up the fight, joking, and insulting the opponents.

Then I passed the mare that I… massacred. After that, Bars and I hung her on her intestines from one of the trees at the edge of the forest. I looked at her, slowed down and sighed.

It seemed like a cool idea, to hang here like that. And It still does…

I felt like a relapsed alcoholic, disappointed with myself. I thought I would be able to stop myself.

I sighed again and moved further into the forest.

I walked along the road but through the forest to avoid random travellers. It was quiet. I still had some dried blood on my face and in my nose, but I could smell damp moss, the only thriving plant in the area. I was walking through the dark forest keeping the road in sight, avoiding the black dead trees for quite a while, about as long as, if I had a shot of vodka before I left, I would have sobered up by now. But I have a lot of time, a whole night. I walked like this in silence for a moment more, until I started hearing water, and saw a faint yellow light. I accelerated to a trot and stopped when I saw the nearest buildings clearly through the trees. A dozen or so houses built mostly of black or brown brick, but patched with almost every material I could think of, wood, scrap metal, plastic sheets or fresh cement. Almost none of them had glass in the windows, most of the windows were boarded up. They were arranged evenly in rows. In the middle of the settlement, there was a wide road from which symmetrically diverged smaller paths, behind them the forest ended and some kind of cliff began. I also could see railroad tracks in the distance.

I looked around to see if anyone was coming, but I didn't see or hear nopony. I crept to the nearest boarded-up window and heard regular creaking from inside the house. I looked through the gap between the boards.

I saw two ponies embracing each other on a mattress. I could hear hispers, quiet moans of pleasure, and kisses. A lot of them. My little guy liked what I saw, but I only felt sad. And Jealous.

It wasn’t regular selfish buck and leave, I had sex before, I’m not a virgin. But it was completely different from this. This was full of passion. They were holding each other tightly, whispering in each other's ear, making sure it felt good for both of them. It's love, happiness.

No it wasn’t sex that I was seeing here. This is something else, something I have never experienced before, sincere love and affection. I watched as he held her, and she held him. Even after they were done, he didn’t just boorishly get up to leave, or start running away. Something that I was guilty of doing myself, but hey, what are you gonna do when a crazy-horny unicorn mare starts levitates a knife to your… And starts making threats about what she’s gonna do if you don’t do everything exactly as she says.

No, he stayed with her, and cuddled her until they both fell asleep in their embrace. That’s what hit me the hardest.

The more I looked, the more jealous I felt.

I moved away from the window and moved to the next house on the right.

I looked through the planks where the window should be and saw a dimly lit room, where a mare was feeding her foal by levitating a spoon with some mush into his mouth.

This one has it fine, getting food for free, having a mother like that. I had to do tricks to get food as a foal, ‘sit’, ‘give a hoof’, ‘roll’, ‘bring me a bottle’. Lucky bastard.

I watched for a few minutes, then decided it was enough. There were only three houses that I could sneak up to without having to run across the street deeper into the settlement. I snuck up to the last house in the row.

In the dark room, I saw two ponies sleeping cuddled together. Hard to tell the age in the darkness, but it doesn’t matter.

Could I ever have something similar? I imagined myself sleeping in that bed, lying on the mattress, cuddled with somepony. Then images of the mare from today, her body ripped open laying next to me on a wholly red and wet bed ran involuntarily through my head. Yeah… I guess that’s the answer.

Next time I will control myself, I will.

I'll have to smear myself in blood so they'll leave me alone, and get drunk or high for the night so I won't be able to join any games. Yeah, That’s a plan.

Then I heard a distant gunshot from the direction I came, then another, and then it became a sound of a serious firefight.

“What the fuck?” I quietly said to myself, and started walking hastily towards the noise, back to the camp.

***

As I was approaching the camp, the gunshots gradually quieted down. A few minutes later I jumped out of the forest into the clearing. The bonfires that my companions had lit were dying down. It was dark, but I could see that many more bodies were laying on the ground than there were after we raided this farm this morning. Numerous piercings and earrings in the bodies of my clan companions reflected the light of the dying fires.

I felt a wave of adrenaline go through my gut.

Somepony killed them? Or was this a big argument that went badly?

I noticed somepony standing next to one of the fires, fifty metres from me. He wasn’t a Raider, I don’t know anypony wearing armour like that. It was too decent and his weapons were too shiny for a raider. Only I and a few others cared about maintaining guns, but nopony did it to that level.

He was turned sideways to me and probably did not see me yet. I was dressed completely black, so I should be able to sneak up on him.

But he’s got guns and armour, and I have only a lil knife… Maybe I should hide? Prepare a plan or–no. I’d be a coward. Only cowards run away from danger. I’ll kill him. Somehow… It’s a terrible fucking idea.

I lowered my head and began quietly approaching the stranger. As I walked towards him, passing bodies of our victims from this morning, and my clanmates. I noticed a very familiar face and ears and stopped. Is this… Gaag laying there? I looked at the big dark figure again. Earchippers always return the favour. At least twice as much. I got moving again, faster this time. My breathing and my heart thumping were the only sounds that accompanied me. I was close now, a couple more steps, and I will be able to throw myself at him with my dagger. I lowered my head to my hooves, bit the button with my teeth, and opened the pocket on my right forehoof, it made a sound, but I barely heard it, he probably didn’t. I grabbed the knife in my mouth and took it slowly out of my pocket. I raised my head with the knife, and–

I saw the big dark figure, a head taller than me, in some thick dark armour aiming right at me with an assault rifle, attached to the saddle by a metal arm that held the gun at his eye level. Only his face was uncovered, and from what I could see through the darkness, it showed no fear.

“Stop, who are you,” he said in a deep voice. I stopped instantly and just looked him straight in the eyes. “Drop that right now,” he added quickly.

Throwing myself at him right now would be suicide. And I should drop the dagger or he’ll kill me.

Fuck, that’s not what a raider would do.

But I’m definitely gonna get killed if I try any–

My thoughts were interrupted by the sound of a gunshot and a sudden light pain in the side of my chest. The force knocked me to my side, and I felt an incredibly strong need to cough something out of my lungs. I started coughing violently and tasted blood in my mouth. Feeling that my breathing just isn’t as effective as it was a moment ago, I panicked for a second

They fucking shot me!

But quickly collected my thoughts, after I felt the pain spread a bit more.

You’re gonna shoot me? That’s how you wanna fucking play?

“Hey! Stop! What are you doing!” The big pony shouted to somepony I couldn’t see. From the ground, I had a nice view of his hooves, and getting up would hurt for sure. Okie dokie, not the first time I’m in this situation. Good that I still had my dagger in my mouth. I planted my left forehoof firmly on the ground, Then I set my rump upright and lifted it at the same time as I lifted my front with, first the left, and then both of my forehooves. Okay, It was harder than usual, but I was standing again. The wound on my chest began hurting more and more, but I have some time before the pain fully kicks in, not much though. “... just a kid, look at him! Bring it right now!” The big Pony said. Hey, I’m around eighteen you asshole! I raised my head and jumped at him with all the force I could muster, aiming the knife at his neck with a smile that gradually built itself on my face, as the anger melted away for some reason. Die! Ha! I would prefer to hit his face for what he did to Gaag, but he was just too tall.

After I stuck the knife in, I used it to support myself to make standing easier. He should be falling down any moment now. Shen he does, I’ll cut his fucking hea–

Then I looked at the knife closely, then at his neck, and then more upward at his face. I missed the neck entirely, and the knife got stuck in his shoulder. From the lack of reaction whatsoever, I guess I didn't even penetrate the armour. Damned rich ponies and their fancy armour! He looked at me surprised for a split second, and then immediately slapped me with a hoof in the face. The shock from being hit on the head made me fall back and on my side again.

“Ow fock,” I said, holding a hoof to my face, “That’s how you want to play you cocksucker?” I said in a playful and challenging tone and began getting up again, the same as before. First, Left hoof… I wasn’t even angry anymore!

“Lay there!”

“Hah, that’s what I said to your mother when”--I lifted my rump–” I loaded her in the ass!” I said, lifting my head from the ground, and looking straight at his face while smiling smugly. Okay, front hooves… And I’m standing again. “Ha!” with a good mood now, even the pain was ignorable!

He turned to face me, “Stop it kid, you’re gonna get yours…” He looked above my head, “ You’re a raider.” His face took a horrified expression for a moment.

Only now has he noticed my ears? “Whoa, congratulations mister fucking”-- He stood two metres from me, I ran up to him, turned around, and sold him a solid buck in the chest, which didn’t move him a centimetre, instead it pushed me away a couple of steps from him, as if I kicked a wall. “perceptive…” I turned around and saw him aiming the gun at me again.

I started slowly walking towards him, which was getting harder and harder with every passing moment, but steadily quickening my step. If I’m gonna die, I’m gonna die with the rest of my clan, and have fun!

“Pussssssyyyyy,” I said, dragging the word out and mockingly. “I’ll shove it up your ass and pull the trigger.” And just as I was about to jump at him, I tripped on something and landed on my jaw and belly right at his hooves. Okay, fuck. I doubt I can– He raised one of his big hooves, and something hard hit me on the top of my head.

***

Waking up chained to a tree was a new one for me. I lifted my head and looked around me. By the weight on my neck, I’d assume they used some metal collar. I sluggishly got up from the yellowish moss, my chest still hurt, I looked over at myself, my greenish-yellow for was stained with a lot of blood, and I could see a stitch where I probably got shot earlier. Assholes didn’t want to use a healing potion on me. I peeked over the tree I was chained to. Three or four metres away was a bonfire, four ponies who sat there looking like they were discussing something. The chain was the same length, so that gave me some options. One of them was the big armoured one. Now that his face was lit by the fire, I could see his coat was brown, and his mane black. Another one, a battered light grey unicorn with a light blue mane was looking right at me. Was he staring at me this whole time?

As soon as he noticed I woke up, He grabbed a shotgun in his cyan magic and started walking towards me with death in his eyes.

Fuck fuck fuck, feeling adrenaline shot in my gut. Without thinking about it, I opened my eyes wide and started backing up from the danger as fast as I could. He shot where I was a second ago, but fortunately missed, one of the pellets chipped my left front hoof, but nothing more, so it didn’t hurt. I continued backing up until the chain got taut, and the collar pressed against the back of my head. He pumped the shotgun as I stood in this awkward position where my whole body was backed up, but my head bound by the chain stayed in the front. My heart was pounding heavily. Fuck he’s got me right on a plate like this.

Fortunately, before he could take another shot, the big armoured pony jumped at him and pinned him to the ground, the magic around the shotgun became yellow, and it floated to an orange-yellow pony standing next to them.

“No! Let me do it!” He screamed not taking his eyes off me.

“Stop it you hear me!?” The brown shouted into his ear, looking into his eyes.

“He killed my daughter!”

“Killing him won’t change anything!” The brown pony gradually lowered his voice, he was talking calmly while saying the last word.

“Do you want to see her now!? See what he did to her?!”

The brown earth pony looked at his orange yellow, and the dark grey friend who stood further back, they both nodded positively. The brown looked like he didn’t like the idea, but sighed and looked at the light grey unicorn. “Okay, take me to her.” The light grey stopped struggling, and they both slowly got up. The unicorn looking straight at me while doing that. When he finally took his eyes off me, he turned around, and they left together into the darkness that began a couple of metres away from the fire.

It took a moment after they left for me to relax slightly. I made a step forward to be able to stand in a normal position and exhaled with relief. The Dark grey unicorn with a black mane walked towards the tree I was chained to and leaned on it.

“Bear Hearts is the only one of us who wanted to keep you alive. Try anything, and you'll have a hole in your skull to match the one in your chest,” he said calmly in a low voice while looking into my eyes without any big ger emotions. Then he and the orange-yellow unicorn went back and sat together on one of the logs lying next to the fire.

I shook my head, slightly shut my wide-opened eyes, and relaxed my facial muscles. I probably looked like I was about to piss myself when he tried to shoot me. Fuck, raiders don’t show fear, I should do something, something to show that I’m not scared.

I heard Scythe’s voice in my head insulting me and mocking me for being such a coward.

Did they get Scythe? He was one of the sharpest in the clan, would he get himself killed that easily? What about Gaag, Soprano, or Bars? Yeah, Bars would get himself killed that easily.

I suddenly felt lonely, very lonely. I haven’t felt like that in a long time. My eyes began… Am I actually gonna fucking cry after them? My throat swelled up too!

These motherfuckers probably killed them all!

Even if I escape, or something, I doubt I can join another raider clan just like that. I’d have to get a new pair of ears to get rid of the Earchippers stigma. And I doubt I could find life among normal ponies even more.

What am I supposed to do?

Fuck. Calm down, don’t be a crying pussy. If you’re a raider and Earchipper. Act like one.

I’ll–I’ll figure something… Yeah, I’ll figure something out. I just need to think of a way to escape, kill them all. And not get killed in the process.

Then everything will work out.

After a few moments, I eventually sat behind the tree I was chained to, which allowed me to hear the conversation of my captors a bit better. Any information is valuable now.

“Maybe let’s sell him as a slave, it would be a punishment, and he wouldn’t be able to hurt anypony,” The Yellow Orange suggested. That fucking cunt! Hearing somepony else than me deciding my fate made me furious. I’m gonna sell him to a cheap griffon brothel and see how he likes that.

“I heard that Red Eye buys every slave in the entire wasteland, and brings them to Fillyadelphia. And I also heard raiders there group in clans again and do the same they did before,” the dark grey unicorn replied. I wish somepony killed both of your whole families and sold both of you to Filly, so you see how it is on your fucking skin.

“Kill-no, sell as slave-no, what, maybe we're supposed to whip him like in the Middle Ages and let him go? What is Bear Hearts thinking of? Because I don’t intend to be a nanny for a little psycho.”

“I don’t know, but he looked like he cared a lot about it.” There was a pause, “Hey, look, there he is." The dark grey unicorn nodded his head towards two figures approaching the fire.

The yellow-orange unicorn stood up, “What? I told him to drag that stallion away from here.”

Bear Hearts approached and then passed the fire together with the light grey unicorn, the eyes of both of them were locked firmly on me.

My heart began thumping faster and I began backing away again when I realised both of them were going straight for me. What the fuck is he doing?

You're an Earchipper! Don't show fear, stand your ground. I thought to myself in Scythe's voice and stopped, trying to calm my breathing. Okay, they said he doesn’t want to kill me.

But he saw her body, that might have changed things a bit.

“Looks like our problem solved itself,” The grey unicorn said indifferently

Fuck.

When he was flush with the tree I was chained to, he pulled the chain with his teeth so hard it yanked me forward, then he pressed his hoof against my back, so I fell flat on my belly, and then, I didn’t have to see it to know, he pressed a gun barrel hard against the top of my head.

“Ouch ouch, ouc–”

“Give me one fucking reason not to blow your fucking head open right fucking now!”

Ow Celestia, that hurts. Is he trying to scare me or is he really that close to killing me? fuck what should I say? Thoughts and scenarios ran quickly through my head.

Beg? No way. Plus it wouldn’t work anyway

Apologise? Same.

Promise I won’t do it again?

“I. Am. Waiting.” he pushed the barrel even harder, my heart thumped hard and I began hyperventilating. Okay, he wants to kill me for real!

A shiver ran through me.

Burst into tears? Even if I wanted to…

Make a run for it!?

I closed my eyes.

None of these will fucking work! Nothing I can say will fucking help!

“Fuck you!” My voice broke as I whined it through my clenched teeth, half on accident, and half on purpose.

I never sounded that much like a scared foal in my life.

…I should not have said that, I should not have said that! Fuck!

“Huh, he’s very self-conscious for a raider,” I guessed it was the yellow-orange one like it was some kind of a joke.

“Yeah” added the grey one lightly, “At least he didn’t just start laughing as most of them would do,” he added and chuckled.

I.. I did it? Did I save my ass?

I opened my eyes, but the pressure on my head increased even more. No, not yet! Ouch!

“Why did you do that to her?” He said in a normal tone, but with poorly hidden anger and disgust.

“Aaah,” I groaned, “I didn’t want to in the beginning.” I tried to look at him, but he was outside of my field of view. I ran my eyes around everything and noticed the light grey unicorn looking dissatisfied, I quickly averted my gaze from him and looked at the ground.

“Oh, you didn’t mean to?! I guess it just turned out like this by itself!” He started loudly, but gradually toned his voice throughout the sentence. I could still hear anger and disgust in it.

Ow fuck he’s gonna crush my fucking skull fuck!

“I guess it fucking did-aAAAh! I tried to control myself! I did! But I did what I always did for my whole fucking life! That’s fucking it you Assh–" The gun barrel pressed harder "-Aaah, stop!”

Then the pressure decreased for a couple of moments, I sighed in relief, but then it increased again, but less than before. “Your whole life?” He seemed to have calmed a bit.

I'll shove that gun up your ass someday! “Are you deaf-" the gun pressed harder again "-aaaaaoooww!”

He took the gun away from my head completely, and I instantly began massaging it with my hooves to get rid of the pain.

Now I also wanted to press a gun against his skull so hard that it would crack. I’ll add that to the list. He thinks he can do anything to me, I’ll show him.

“What are you doing!? You saw what he did to her!” The light grey unicorn standing next to the chain tree was furious.

Bear Hearts approached him with a firm step, put a hoof on his shoulder and whispered something in his ear. “Let go,” he added after he moved away from him. The light grey unicorn opened his eyes and mouth wide. His battered face took a furious expression, then it became sad, and then all the emotions disappeared. He looked Bear Hearts in the eyes again, then turned around without a word, walked away, passed the campfire, and disappeared into the darkness. His step was quick, he still was probably furious.

“What now?” Light grey asked Bear Hearts.

“We’re not letting him go,” he said while walking towards the bonfire, he opened one of the bags with his mouth, sat in front of it, and began looking for something.

“Oh good, because I thought you were gonna want to do the same thing you did in Radwaters.”

Bear Hearts fished out two different-looking collars from the bag and showed them to his companions. “I have a better idea.”

The orange-yellow put his hoof to his face and sighed resignedly. “No, please.”

Bear hearts looked at them seriously. “We’re taking him with us.”

I'm going to get myself a gun!

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I knew my raider life would end one day. But I thought It was gonna end with me getting killed by some stray bullet,m or running away from the clan, and not like… this!

I lightly tugged on the chain and touched one of the three collars they put on me, the one that I thought had a bomb. It was difficult to tell which one. I didn’t see them, but I could feel them. They took up almost all of my neck and made it uncomfortable to move my head.

They will probably get me killed in some kind of public execution or sell me as a slave, or keep me as a trophy.

Quite a stressful train of thought. One that made my heart speed up, and one which only stopped at two stations, called: I really don’t want to be skinned alive by an angry mob; And the next one: I have to get out of here, fast!

The autumn nights had begun, and it was slightly colder than a comfortable temperature, so I lay on the ground shivering and wondering what options I had for escaping. I lay on the ground chained to a tree while my captors either slept in the warmth of a fire two metres away from me. The big brown one, Bear Hearts I think, was supposed to stand guard, but the fat idiot fell asleep. Not that It helped me with anything. I was still on a chain.

Then I heard rustling in the bushes.

I turned my head with difficulty, and in the darkness lit only by the dim fire’s light on the trees, I saw the figure of a pony watching me from the bushes. It wasn’t any pony figure. I looked closer, At the ears. They had marks carved on them, it was an Earchipper! Somepony survived!

The figure slowly approached me, and as It too got lit by the dim yellow light emanating from the fire, I recognised the pony, It was Scythe! My eyes shot wide open, and I opened my mouth and smiled. Not all hope is lost! I didn’t get up, I didn’t want the chain to start clanking to wake the fatty up.

Then, as Scythe was a metre away from me, he smiled crazily while looking at me, and took his knife out.

He won’t be able to cut the chain with just a knife! Why is he…

No.

I started backing up, and he noticed that and sped up to catch me. He put one of his forelegs around my neck, holding my head in such a way that we both stood in the same direction and I didn’t see him at all. He lowered my head to his chest lever, and with the other foreleg, he took a knife out of his mouth and put it to my neck. I felt the tip of the cold blade touch the bottom of my jaw.

“Scythe! What the fuck are you doing?!” I asked shocked, whispering as loud as I thought I could, as not to wake my captors.

“I always fucking knew you were a coward,” firmly and quickly whispered mo in his ear

“What fuck are you”--

“You’re a worthless pile of shit, that pretends it's good for something more than just being gutted like the rest of the prisoners, while you can’t even kill one mare without feeling remorse.”

“It wasn’t remorse! I just want to be in contr–”

His leg round my neck tightened and he lowered my head even further, “And then pisses himself when somepony holds a gun to his head!” he whispered with anger, “ You’re not a raider, and that’s how I’m going to treat you now,” he said it with excitement as if he was looking forward to it, and I felt the cold blade of the knife running across my throat.

‘I am, Scythe!’ – that’s what I almost said. But I stopped just in time.

If I said that, he’d slit my throat. I need to fucking calm down! I need to–I need to stop talking like a scared filly!

I took a deep, shaky breath, “Fuck you, cunt! Help me out or I’m gonna cut your balls off when I get free!” I whispered as aggressively as I could and prayed to… anything that it works.

He held my head, so I didn’t see his reaction, I just saw the trees ahead of us, but he didn’t say anything for a few seconds.

Then he quietly chuckled, “Listen Pensie, I’m going to get myself a gun, “ he said matter-of-factly. I closed my eyes with relief and took another breath.

“You want a medal for that?” I asked him like he was an idiot.

“And I am going to kill all of you,” he said lightly.

“Wh–”

“Unless… Unless by then I’ll see you’re really a raider.” I felt the blade of the knife do circles, in a motion that you would do if you were slitting somepony’s throat, but without any pressure. “And not a cunt that goes ‘Oh, I don’t feel like killing anypony today’ like you’ve been doing for the last couple of raids.” he took the knife away and tapped its flat side against the top of my nose every second word. “You start being a proper raider, and stop playing at that ‘ I want to be a normal pony’ bullshit, and I will help you.” He turned us around to face the fireplace and pointed at my captors sleeping there. We’ll kill these cocksuckers together, and then, we’ll let everypony know that Earchippers are doing better than ever. Or, “ he put the knife to my neck again, “ I kill them myself, and do the same you did to that white mare, but in reverse order.”

Now that got me scared. He knew this whole time?! Did he follow me whenever I went away? And he wants us two to continue being a clan and raid?!

If he helps me, it’s back to raider’s life, and no way back.

I looked at the three pony figures sleeping at the fireplace. Maybe, if these three won’t kill me and I manage to escape, I have a chance at a different life. I don’t want to waste that chance!

I didn’t respond for a couple of seconds. He must have noticed that.

“Penise, do you really think you could have a life amongst normal ponies? Do you really believe that?”

Is this some kind of a trap?

I stayed quiet again.

“Tell me, do you think anypony would want you in their life? Knowing what you did? That there are ponies who wouldn’t care that you tortured, killed, and raped as a form of entertainment?”

I was filled with frustration, I wanted to say something, that he is a complete idiot, and has no idea what he is talking about. But he had a point

Nopony would want somepony like me.

“And you can’t hide that.” I felt the blade of his knife tap at a scar that ran from the top of my head to a part of my face. “It's written all over your face, especially your ears.” he chuckled and paused, “Well unless you cut them off.” He added and chuckled again.

I sighed. I doubt even cutting them off would help.

“Stop dreaming about things you can't have. It’s a waste of time, and it spoils the mood.” he took the knife away from me

“How the fuck am I supposed to be a proper raider with a fucking bomb on my neck?” I responded after a moment. He let go of my neck and stood in front of me.

“I see a couple of possibilities.”

“Yeah? Like what?.”

“Get creative.” he said and slowly backed into the bushes he came from, with a smile on his face, “I’ll see you soon. Remember, Earchippers always return the favour.” And he disappeared into the darkness

***

We walked along some road made from grey, cracked asphalt that cut through the dead forest. The air smelled like rain, was heavy and moist from the morning dew, and was filled with a cricket of grasshoppers, who gathered in groups in the thick mounds of moss on the sides of the road, and played lively together, hundreds of tiny orchestras played like that at once so it all blended into a plain noise. I had no idea where the road led, but it was a different one that I used yesterday to check the bricky village last night.

The yellow-orange pony, whose name I learned this morning, Flame Bash, was walking at the back of our little caravan. In front of him, was I, mostly looking at the ground in front of my hooves with my head lowered. It was easier to walk like that because of the weight of the collars and the chain. I was attached to the giant silhouette of Bear Hearts with a long two-metre chain. At the front walked the Grey one, Silver Shine, constantly looking back at us to check if everything was fine.

So far none of them have said a word to me. I figured that as long as I wasn't causing any trouble, they were not interested in me at all. Only Bear Hearts glanced at me every now and then with different facial expressions. Sometimes they were hard, sometimes perplexed, sometimes even sympathetic. It was annoying, but for now, I was focused more on thinking.

I need to take the collars off first. As long I have them on me, I can’t do anything to prove to Scythe that I’m a real raider. But how am I supposed to take a steel collar with a bomb off my neck without anypony noticing? Knowing anything about bombs would be helpful, but all I know is that they go boom. That old bastard Powder Keg could do makeshift explosives. That shit was really fun! We put them under a house full of ponies once, they were so strong that pieces of the roof flew almost up to the clouds. He never wanted to share how he made them though.

I wonder who else from the clan got out alive.

Ah, fuck that. For now, my best bet would be to find a key to the collar. Best case scenario for all three of them, take them off, and then kill these three in such a horrible way, that even Scythe will be impressed–.

“-tjaewename, raider?” somepony asked, interrupting my thoughts.

I raised my head to see who was talking, “What?”

Bear Hearts turned his head back and was firmly looking straight at me. “Do you have a name?”

He wants my name? Sure.

“Fuck you,” I said lively

Wait, maybe he will tell me what they want to do with me.

"You're gonna sell me as a slave, or kill me later anyway," I added

"Maybe we won't, or maybe we will so answer the question." He pressed

I sighed, " My name is," I made a dramatic pause "I hope you die, you son of a bitch." I said protractedly, as if savouring the brilliant retort, and then smiled, all while looking at him.

He sighed, as if giving up, and then suddenly looked at Flame Bash and shook his head negatively.

I turned my head around to see why he was doing that, the collars made it difficult, so by the time I managed to do that, I just saw Flame Bash looking at Bear Hearts disappointed.

"Ya sang very differently with a gun put to your head, raider, " Flame Bash commented seriously, with a mild contempt in his voice.

That made me feel an enormous need to punch him in his stupid face.

Had I not been chained, I’d do it.

The black dead forest surrounding us gradually thinned, the trees became more and more lonely, and instead of moss, sand started dominating the area, and patches of dirty green grass appeared around the road from time to time. With no trees blocking the view, I could see a wall and a gate just a while of walking from us.

Wait, we're going into a city already?! A sudden wave of panic shot through me and made me stop in place.

I haven’t even had the time to try and look for the keys! And we terrorised the area for so long that the ponies living there will want to kill me for sure!

Bear Hearts felt the chain attached to his heavy blue armour get taut and turned his head towards me. “I will not be pulling you all the way there. Move.”

“Why are–” I cleared my throat and calmed down the tone, “Why are you taking me there?” I said while jumping between the faces of my captors with my eyes.

“You’ll see, raider,” I heard Flame Bash say from behind. Then I noticed Silver Shine start smiling.

Do they want to do a fucking public execution on me or what?!

…Or sell me to the citizens so they can take revenge on me like a scapegoat?!

My breathing quickened up and got irregular, which I tried to hide as well as I could.

“Calm down, we're just going there to collect the payment.” Bear Hearts said, looking at me calmly, and pulled the chain. That made Silver Shine lose his smile.

“Bullshit! You’re gonna give me to them like a trophy!” I said as I leaned back to put as much resistance to the chain as possible.

Bear Hearts just started walking forward, pulling me behind him almost effortlessly like a giant he was. “It’s not like you don’t deserve that.” He added without turning back to me. I tried planting my hooves in the ground, but he was just too strong. Like trying to pull a train. Every time I stopped and resisted, the collar steadily pulled by my head and I had to take a step forward to not fall forward on my jaw. After a few tries I gave up on that, which made me panic a bit.

They’ll skin me alive! I need to do something! Anything!

Being pulled by Bear Hearts I came up with another desperate idea, and without a second thought, I took a run-up and prepared to jump on his back to get to the spot the chain was attached to.

As I was about to take the jump, I felt a wave of something shocking go through me. It almost didn’t hurt, but I got all stiff, my muscles all locked up, and I fell to the ground tittering. I lay there, terrified of what happened, not being able to even take a breath. After a moment the feeling disappeared, I regained control of my own body, and instantly jumped up on my hooves. I set myself up standing sideways between Bear Hearts and Flame Bash breathing heavily because of the shock.

“Now don’t ya do anything even more stupid.” Flame Bash said levitating something in his yellow magic. I just stared at him wide-eyed “The third collar you’ve got on yourself, it’s a shock collar. Ya do something like that again, am gonna keep electrocuting you until you pass out.

What

I half-understood what he was saying to me.

“You understand?”

I would be angry, but just now I realized how fucked I am…
What am I supposed to do!? I can’t do anything!

Bear Hearts pulled again, and without resisting, I gave up and followed.

A fucking shock collar?! The bomb wasn’t that bad, because they probably wouldn’t blow up my head without a proper reason, but a fucking shock collar!? They will electrocute me for every little fucking thing I do wrong!

Infuriating helplessness filled me whole. I didn’t deserve this!

I need a plan. Plan… plan… plan... Come on, think of something! Let’s see, after I get free I just have to follow the road back to get to the camp, and from there I could get to the brick village… Somehow. Let’s see, we took a couple of turns on our way. The first one was right, then… left? And then on the roundabout, we went kinda right but not entirely… or did we go entirely right and almost turned around? Fuck! I never had to keep track of the way! Scythe always led, we just followed him! Ah fuck! We’re just at the gate! Think of something!

The gate was just a sideways-laid red cargo container that went through the wall made of the dead tree trunks horizontally piled on top of one another with sharp pieces of scrap metal embedded in the lower logs, while the top one was wrapped in barbed wire. From time to time I could see heads popping above the wall to check the area, and quickly dive back down.

When we were about fifty metres from the gate, the top door of the cargo container opened, revealing a thankfully smiling stallion wearing pieces of tarnished metal that served him as armour. Then he opened the container’s bottom door and stepped aside for us to pass through.

As the dark grey leader of my captors went through the gate, the guards shook his hooves,\ and thanked him passionately. Before Bear Hearts entered the red container, he glanced over at me, probably checking if I'm up to anything, and stopped right before it.

“You first,” he said firmly, but not in a commanding manner. I looked at the gate for a second while breathing quickly and hearing my heart thump hard. But I didn’t argue. These motherfuckers can just electrocute me into obedience whenever they want. I entered the red gate still with my head lowered. The gate guard’s expression changed almost instantly, the smile disappeared, he squinted his eyes, and a threatening look entered his face.

I wanted to just pin my eyes to the ground and move forward, but that would be an admission of fear. And raiders don’t show fear.

I took a deep breath, and without even blinking I stared straight into his eyes as I passed him. When I exited the gate, I found myself standing amongst a small crowd of pedestrians, who stopped to cheer out thanks towards Silver Shine. When instead of seeing another one of their heroes they saw me – a scarred young yellowish-green pony bearing Earchippers marks on his ears, they fell silent and just stared at me in shock.

The sudden silence made me feel very unsafe, scared even, like a gigantic threat was hanging over me ready to get me any second now. I stopped and stood unmoving too.

What are they gonna do? Will they throw themselves on me? Or when I move?

It was the longest couple of seconds of my life. I didn't move a muscle until Bear Hearts left the gate, I waited for him to overtake me and started following him only when the chain was almost taut.

With my whole heart, I hoped Bear Hearts wasn’t lying to why we were here. I felt like I was about to start shaking on the spot.

The crowd, seeing that I was chained, and a prisoner, woke up from the silent confusion and soon, insults along with assurances that I'm lucky to be alive at all, that they should have killed me, threats and that I deserved it all began to pour out of their mouths. It was overwhelming. Every single one of these ponies wanted me dead, and nothing was holding them back. Nowhere was safe.

but I suddenly shook myself off

Fuck, I’m a raider damn it! I need to act like one!

I took a deep breath, raised my head high, as high as I could, and kept walking forward, slowing down to distance myself from Bear Hearts.

Gray led us down the middle of the town's main road full of ponies screaming either of happiness or anger.

They all would scream differently if I wasn't chained and I had a few friends with me. – I reassured myself, and while still not feeling entirely safe, I gained a bit of confidence, enough to look straight at their faces, infuriating them even more.

Then Silver Shine turned and entered one of the buildings with a big sign with something written on it. Bear Hearts followed, and I followed him.

Please don’t be an execution room or prison, please don’t be an execution room or prison, please don’t be an execution room or prison

Except for the cage in the corner of the room, the inside looked like a small office. A big desk with a light blue pony wearing a police cap and dark blue uniform sitting behind it, two chairs in front of it, both of them were occupied, one by a yellow-coated crying mare, and the other one by a young white stallion around my age. A couple of chairs set in a row on the opposite side of the room, and a cage made of two pieces of metal mesh separated the far corner of the room from the rest. Looked like two or three ponies could fit there at most. Flame Bash closed the door behind us and the shouting from outside quietened.

“Excuse me for a moment,” said the stallion behind the desk to the crying mare as he got up to greet Silver Shine. I and Bear Hearts stopped near the entrance.

My heart thumped, if they sell me to them, they will tear me to pieces!

“Done.” Silver Shine said simply

“I heard so. Thank you, all of you. You have no idea how much we suffered from the Earchippers, and you stopped it forever. Thank you, from me, all of the Fillington, and especially Buckrough." He said as he handed him a metal box with his hoof.

“Do you mind if I…?” Silver Shine said, nodding at the box.

“No, of cour–” The crying mare quickly approached silver shine and put her hooves together in a begging manner.

“Sir, please, my husband, he’s missing! We ran into the Windbreaker Forest to hide from raiders, and he didn’t come back! Please, there’s a Hedger there, you're the only ones that can help! I beg you!” She pleaded sobbing.

Silver Shine looked at Bear Hearts and Flame Bash, Bear Hearts nodded positively, and I turned my head to see Flame Bash doing the same behind me.

“Can you watch him until we get back?” Silver Shine asked the blue pony in a uniform.

“Y-yes of course, I was gonna ask about… The raider.” he looked at me, “What will you do with him?”

Please Bear Hearts, don’t turn out to be a liar.

“For now we’ll be keeping him as a prisoner, why?”

“Well… Lots of the ponies here had friends in Windy Fields, and almost everypony lost somepony because of raiders. Let’s say uh, let’s say that we’d be interested in… taking care of him.” He and Silver Shine looked at me again, I had my eyes planted at Silver Shine, who raised his brows and looked intrigued by the offer.

I waited for him to respond. The seconds dragged out and felt like a silent eternity, only interrupted by my beating heart. Come on, come on!

“We’ll keep that offer in mind. Now, I suppose we should get going, where did you last see your husband?” Silver shine turned to the yellow mare.

I looked down, relaxed, and quietly let go of a breath I didn’t know I was holding.

The white young pony stood up. “I’ll lead you, I know the way, but we don’t have much time.”

“Let’s go then.” Silver Shine ordered. And everypony except the crying mare and the blue uniform pony began to move out. Bear hearts lead me to the cage, into which I reluctantly entered. Resisting right now would be a terrible idea.

After Bear Hearts unhooked the chain from me, he approached the uniform pony. “Be careful, he’s one tough son of a bitch.” They both looked at me, “He wanted to hooffight me with a gunshot wound through the chest, be careful about him.” The uniform pony nodded.

***

“--nd we are proud to announce, that thanks to three heroic ponies, Silver Shine, Flame Bash, and Bear Hearts, the raider clan known as Earchippers is no more! That’s right, I repeat, the plague of the Fillyngton and Bormane Counties known as Earchippers was finally exterminated last night! Of course, remember to be careful when travelling through the Windbreaker Forest, some Earchipper leftovers might still roam in the area. How do you recognise an Earchipper you might ask? Easy! They carve patterns on the outer auricle of their ears. Combine that with regular raider fashion, like lots of piercings, scars, and bad-quality leather armour with unnecessary spikes and you have a stereotypical image of an Earchipper. Well, that’s it for now, stay tuned for more news from Two Counties Radio. We’ll come back live with more news as soon as something happens, and for now, enjoy Dj Pon3’s broadcast. Two Counties out. ” A burst of static filled the room, and after a moment, a voice of some other presenter who introduced himself as Dj Pon3 burst from the radio.

I sat in the cage in the corner of the office with my back against the wall, with nothing to do except for watching the office. An hour passed, my captors hadn't returned, and the yellow mare cried the whole time. The longer they were gone, the more intensely she cried and mumbled how her husband is a hero, and that he sacrificed himself or something. The blue uniform pony, who I learned was the mayor, suggested that she go home and that he would notify her when her husband returned, but she refused to go, she said she would wait for him here. At some point, even the mayor gave up on trying to comfort her. He just sat in his chair and from time to time looked at me like… I don't know, like I got away with something?

“We were about to sell the wagon,” she sniffed, “ to buy a place to settle down together,” she sobbed again, “I don’t want it without him, I don’t want it!” She was interrupted by a sudden outburst of crying.

Having somepony to worry about you like that must be… I wish I knew what it’s like. it must somehow be a pleasant feeling.

The more I heard her cry, the more curious I became about her husband. Who is it that he aroused such love in her? Must be somepony special. Some kind of super pony or something. I imagined someone like that. Tall, good looking, with a coat and mane full of vibrant colour, strong, kind, confident, tough, dutiful…

Then I mentally looked at myself: A smaller than average, pale yellowish-green coat, mud-coloured mane, scarred psycho with unusually sharp teeth and cut ears. Yeah…

I glanced at one of the office’s windows next to the entrance. Ponies were standing there, watching the inside. They wanted to get inside earlier, to ‘have a chat with me’ but the mayor held them off. Unwillingly though.

Enough of waiting, they should be far enough now.

They must have left the detonator for the bomb collar with the mayor. If I can provoke him to threaten me with it, well I’d at least know what it looks like. Or even better, provoke him to get in the cage with me, then I could take it from him.

I glanced across the room. A boring desk in the corner, the mayor sitting at it. Two chairs in front of the desk, the green-maned yellow mare sitting in one of them. Then a row of chairs against the wall, a weapon locker, and the entrance door. Against the other wall, in the corner was my cage, and a big space up until the very entrance door. What could I use to provoke him and not make it obvious?

Start bragging about what I did during the raids? - Nuh, Insult him? - obvious, start hitting the cage walls? I glanced at them, the grey flexible mesh was attached to vertical poles under the walls and one in the corner of the cage. The walls would bend if I leaned on them. I could try… Nah, apart from the annoying noise, I doubt it will achieve anything. I looked at the yellow weeping mare. Surely he will react if I start harassing her…

“He is a good pony. He always helped others. We wanted a place to have foals together.” She continued her sobbing.

The mayor clearly wanted her to shut up, as much as he didn’t want to show it.

We raided homes with families inside often, and since a couple raids ago it made me wonder; How does a pony want to have foals? Do you just wake up one day and say, "I want foals?" Or is it something you always want? I never wanted foals. Would it change if I had somepony?

That I definitely won’t find out…

What am I even fucking thinking! I need to do something, so I’m ready to go when Scythe gets back. Time to shut this mare up.

“Stop fucking crying,” I said aloud and with resentment in my voice. It surprised her. For an instant, she stopped and looked at me surprised with her mouth open. The mayor reacted instantly as well, he stood up from his desk with an angry look in his eyes.

“Don’t worry about him,” He told her softly while signalling with his hoof that everything is fine, and then approached the cage “And you, shut your fucking mouth or I will shut it for you, raider.” He croaked through his teeth with a fit of incredible anger.

I smiled. Bingo.

I got up from the floor and approached the cage walls too. We looked at each other, me smiling with the nastiest smile I could muster, and him as if his gaze alone, if focused enough, would kill me. He kept his distance and moved away from the cage when I closed in. I then suddenly turned my head towards the yellow mare.

“Of course, he’s fucking dead, come to terms with it.”

“Don't listen to the raider-” The mayor tried to counter me.

“You think that what, alone in the woods with a hedger all that time, and he will return whole and healthy to you?” That made her cry so intensely, that she only took short breaks for gasping breaths, and it sounded as if the crying was suffocating her.

The mayor stepped back, and stood not knowing what to do for a moment, then he approached the mare. “Don’t listen to him, they will find him.” After that, he started going straight for his desk.

Good, what will you take out of the desk there?

“Yeah, they will find him, lying dead and half eaten by the Hedger!”

What even is a Hedger? Eh, I don’t care.

The mayor opened a drawer in his desk and took out a dark navy blue remote with a single black button on it. He placed it quickly on the countertop, and… What is he doing?

"This will shut you up," He said confidently.

He's hitting the button right away?! He’s gonna blow my head just for that?!

The nasty smile I had disappeared from my face, and I leaned against the cage walls with my front legs. “Wait! What are you–aughhh!”

I felt a familiar wave of shock and stiffness spread from my neck, to the rest of my body. While I leaned on the cage walls my muscles locked up. Shaking, unable to let go of the mesh or even breathe, I stood on my rear legs looking at the mayor standing at his desk, a little smile slowly making its way onto his face, while he firmly held the button pressed.

I felt minimally relieved. Well, as relieved as a pony that can't breathe can be., I couldn’t breathe! Fuck fuck fuck.

The longer he held me shocked, the more I ran out of air, which made me panic. Will he let go? He wouldn't suffocate me would he? Yes, he would! Fuck!

After a good while, when I couldn't hold much longer and thought I was gonna pass out, he finally let go of the button. Suddenly relaxing all my muscles, I fell sideways to the ground. The cage was small, I fell on the metal mesh that served as a second wall, which eased my fall, and I took a deep breath that felt like such a relief as if someone had put out the fire in my lungs.

I was lying down and breathing heavily when I suddenly looked at the grinning mayor, who comfortably sat in his chair, crossed his rear legs and was once again bringing his hoof closer to the remote control.

Okay, this was a bad idea. Of course, they fucking left him the shock remote too! At least I know how it looks now.

“Fucking" – I gasped –" Assh–”

He pressed it again. I stiffened, and while twitching and moaning both at once, I lay on the floor for another good while. The yellow mare just looked at me wiping her tears, her face hardened, and she turned and looked at the window across the room.

I merely told her to shut up and she lets him torture me? That bitch! I’m gonna make her regret that when Scythe gets back!

The shock stopped again. I gasped for air and lay on the wooden floor unmoving while coughing and breathing heavily.

I saw the mayor prepare for another round, he stretched his hoof over the remote and–

-"Stop, It's enough." The yellow mare stated softly.

Huh?

She stands up for me?

Lying face down on the ground, with only one eye I could see she glanced at me with a slight anger, or contempt, maybe both, but then she turned to the mayor, and her face took a pleading look.

"I don't think so, " The mayor responded leaning over the desk towards her, “he did the exact same thing to others, it's only fair if he gets a taste of his own medicine.”

“Please, Cotton, I know you had friends in Windy Fields, but you are lowering yourself to his level.”

He looked at me with his hateful blue eyes. “Fine.” He swung backwards and landed on the back of the chair, but still looked at me.

What?

She… helped me? Why? Does she want something from me? What could she want from me? No. She just… By herself?

“Tables turned and you’re so tough anymore now, are you,? Too bad they didn't kill you too, you don't deserve to live an hour longer, you vermin,” The mayor added.

“Shut up… I’ll… You’ll pay for this… Cocksucker,” I threatened while panting slightly.

“Pay for this?” he raised his voice in indignation. “You’re getting what you deserve. No! You deserve much more than that.” He got up from his chair, approached the cage, and lowered his head, speaking almost right into my ear. I lifted my head and watched his eyes carefully. “Every Wednesday during summer ponies from Windy Fields would come here for market day.” He spoke in a low growling voice, “We celebrated holidays together and helped each other. Storm Silk came here yesterday night, and told me what you and your friends did to his daughter! To all of them!” He screamed in rage, but quickly calmed his voice and went back to the low growl “Only out of my respect for Silver you’re not getting hanged on the market this very moment. But I will do anything in my power to give ponies who live here at least a small part of the vengeance they deserve.”

“Fuck. You.” I replied with my trusty phrase.

I don’t deserve to be hanged.

Who are you to tell me what I deserve and what I don't? Nobody. Just a fat blue cocksucker.

He slowly lifted his head, walked away from the cage and sat down in the chair by the desk

I felt a slight burning pain under the collar closest to my head. I sat up and tried to massage it away with my hoof.

Is there any other way to get the collar key, or the remote, or whatever opens these pieces of shit from him?

Provoke him so much that he’ll want to kill me with his bare hooves, or something? No. Whatever I’ll do, he’ll just start frying me with the collar from a safe distance again!

I looked around the room again, and my sight landed on the yellow mare, her eyes hiding behind that long dim green mane. At least I know that not everypony here wants to skin me alive. I felt a kind of gratitude, immediately her face seemed to me more pleasant, kind.

I suddenly got an uncomfortable feeling that I should do something.

But what?

No. She wants something from me in return. Nopony is nice like that without a reason.

I looked away from her. I need to be careful until I find out what she wants from me.

As the emotions subsided, I yawned. Exhaustion after a sleepless night began to overwhelm me. I got up, and went to the corner of the cage, the safest one, farthest from the mesh walls, in the very corner of the building, and lay down on my stomach, front towards the room, and my rear squeezed in the corner. I was a little hungry too, but I was sure that I wouldn't get anything from the mayor.

This is hopeless. I'll have to wait until they get back and try to get these keys later. For now… I need some rest…

What does she want from me?

***

I woke up to the sound of metal tapping on metal. I quickly opened my eyes and lifted my head to check what was making the noise. I saw the light grey unicorn with a light blue mane that tried to shoot me yesterday night! I felt an adrenaline shot, jumped on my hooves instantly, and took a fighting stance.

What will he do? Will he shoot me? Where’s the mayor?

Wait.

He has no gun this time.

In the now dark office, lit by a single dim yellow bulb, there was no one but us. He was standing at the cage door, shakily opening the cage with the keys held in his magic. Without a word. Just breathing irregularly and looking at me in a way that was hard to figure out which emotion was currently driving him.

I didn’t say a word either, just stood in the cage’s opposite corner and watched his every move carefully. He took the keys, put them in the lock, opened the cage door, blocked the exit with his body, and just stood there, waiting for something.

How did he get here? What does he want? Doesn’t he want to kill me? Why is he opening the cage? What is happening? All these questions unanswered made me feel very uneasy, to the point where I didn’t want to move at all.

Maybe… anger made him lose his mind maybe?

He wasn’t much bigger than me, half a head taller at most, and of a similar thin frame to me. I probably could handle him in a hoof fight. My very sharp teeth also gave me the edge over him. Plus I was a raider… which he knows so… What is he doing?

He looks like he wants to brawl me. Is he that stupid?

I began to regain my confidence.

I relaxed a bit and moved.

It's very strange, but I'm not going to miss an opportunity like that.

I slowly approached him, expecting… I don’t know what. When I came within range of his hooves, I stopped, waiting for something, anything but he didn’t move a muscle. I came closer, up until I was almost face to face with him.

Then he growled and raised his hoof for something. In a flash, I jumped up with my front legs and hit that idiot with both front legs right in the nose before his hoof could even reach me. He fell on his back, onto the floor in the centre of the room clutching his face, and lay there moaning in pain.

“Ah, you son of a bitch!” he groaned weakly.

Did he think he could win a hoof fight with a raider? What an absolute retard! I looked at the pathetic lying and moaning pony on the floor.

Heh, lay there. As soon as I get my hooves on the remotes, I’m going to have a bit of fun with you.

I went straight to the mayor's desk, picked a random drawer, opened it, and began digging through it.

I’m going to have to stab his lungs first, so he doesn’t scream. Then I could do anything to him, and Scythe will fucking see, that I am a real raider.

I opened a second drawer and saw a big white remote, similar to the shock collar one, but with a much bigger red button on it. I smiled, and–felt a familiar shock spreading over my body from the neck! I fell on my side, twitching on the floor, not being able to take a breath, and not knowing what was happening.

“You fucking animal!” His voice was high-pitched like he was barely stopping himself from crying right now.

The shock stopped, and my neck was left with burning pain, but that could wait.

I’m gonna kill that motherfucker. And then gut him like his daughter.

I jumped straight to my hooves, they trembled from the shock, but I stood up and turned towards–

Just to be bucked straight into the right side of my face. The impact made me fall to my side. I fell on the mayor's desk, knocking off everything that was there, a lamp, papers, and some other things I didn't recognize. When I lay on the floor, he began shocking me with the collar again. And he held it, for a long while. While he did that, he looked at me silently with a rather childish-looking mixture of anger and sadness.

Fuck Fuck fuck! I have to do something! – I panicked.

After a moment of hopelessly thrashing around I tried to calm my body, to try to start breathing manually. It took a lot of effort, but I managed to take one, small wheezing breath. It was far too little of what I needed to stay alive! Another while passed, and I was seriously running low on oxygen, I tried to direct my twitching into hitting him. He stood behind me, so I focused and kicked clumsily where I thought his legs would be with all the strength I had. I hit something, his focus shattered, and the familiar dark blue pilot fell to the floor next to me. Party’s over, motherfucker!

I finally took a breath, then another, and finally tried to get up. Time to get him! My legs trembled and refused to obey me as if I had just run a marathon but without fatigue. I had the front of my body halfway lifted up when the shock paralysed me again, and I fell on my stomach.

Now that got me terrified. I thought I’m gonna get more time!

“S-s-stop!” I almost screamed through my teeth while feeling drool leaking out of my mouth.

He didn’t respond. I just heard him breathe loudly and irregularly. Fuck! No! He’s going to kill me!

“P-ple-ea-ease!” I moaned. No! That’s not what a raider would do! I could almost hear Scythe insulting me for that. Fuck I was so pathetic!

But that made him stop. My chest unlocked, and I greedily started sucking in the air. All of my limbs felt turned off, my heart thumped, and my whole body shook. I didn’t even try to get up this time. Suddenly I felt first my head, and then the top half of my body being lifted by some white halo. It turned me around towards him and raised my head to his eye level while the lower half of my body lay on the floor. He brought my face closer to his, his horn shining brightly, our noses almost touching.

“Cloud begged you the same. The same way!” He hit me in the face with his hoof while saying that in a shaky and filled with frustrated fury voice. Then he paused to watch me pant with my lips up and eyes squinted, “And you didn’t stop!” he shouted accusingly, his eyes glistening with tears, “Why didn't you stop?!” he shouted again and turned his face away. “You didn’t stop then,” he said in a calm but still very shaky voice.

I opened my eyes wide,

“Wait–”

The shock returned, it made me bend backwards like a C shape and groan loudly while staring at the ceiling. I felt more saliva trickle out of the corner of my mouth, and–

***

-“Wake up raider”

I was immediately reminded of what happened yesterday by a strong burning pain under one of my collars. I opened my eyes and immediately raised my head to get an idea of what was going on. I was greeted by the stern and disappointed face of Bear Hearts looking down through the mesh of the cage. Behind him in the middle of the room, between the desk and the cage, stood the mayor watching what he was doing. Bear Hearts, without saying anything, entered the cage, barely fitting through the door Before I could fully stand up he stood over me and roughly grabbed me by one of the collars with his hoof. I hissed in pain, which made him pause for a moment.

"It must be by electrocution, " said the mayor with no sympathy in his voice, "He's probably burned from the collar," he added with slight satisfaction.

Bear Hearts fastened the chain, turned around, and walked out of the cage.

"Thanks and sorry for the trouble," he said.

"Fortunately nothing happened, but it could have ended much worse, I hope you are aware," The mayor said accusingly.

"Yes, I know."

The mayor nodded in response, “Just know that my offer from yesterday still stands.”

Bear Hearts wordlessly jerked the chain pulling me, the burn on my neck hurt a lot, and I let out a slight ‘Ah’. He walked out of the building and I followed him out onto the main street of the city, passing passersby who were staring at us.

Then, for a split second, I swear I saw somepony I recognised.

I turned around, to try to get a good look at him. But he disappeared.

Who was that?

Was that Storm Silk? I wasn’t sure…

After the night I felt anxious and permanently in danger. He could have killed me with ease if he wanted to. He might still want to. And I have no chance to defend myself! He just has to get the remote to any of the collars! Or- or hang me by the chain with his magic!

If he got inside the office, he probably could get me anywhere! Until Scythe comes back, I have to stay close to Bear Hearts and his crew.

Then I became angry at myself. I clenched my teeth and looked at the ground.

I begged for my life! Like a coward, like, like a… Not a Raider! Scythe, Bars, Gaag, Soprano, any of them would just start laughing at Storm’s face if they were in my place.

I’m a fucking pathetic… worthless…

Suddenly Bear Hearts turned right without warning, pulled me by my burned neck making me hiss, then we turned right again into some alley and then left. He walked fast and turned without warning, so I had to walk at half the chain length so he wouldn't pull me when turning.

Evidently, he is mad at me. Storm Silk and the mayor, they must have told him something.

Doesn’t matter what they say to him, I'd rather that than admit what I did. Worse if they decide to punish me though, but I'll manage.

I walked along with him in silence until he turned abruptly and entered a medium-sized building with a large sign and some kind of glowing writing on it. We entered a cramped vestibule in which Bear Hearts and I barely fit side by side, I had to walk behind him to fit in. We passed a reception, climbed a steep wooden staircase, and entered a corridor, which branched off to the sides, there were about six pairs of doors on that corridor with either a green or a red badge on the door handle. He opened one of the doors right in front of the staircase. I stood behind him. Inside I saw the faces of Silver Shine and Flame Bash, they were sitting on beds in a cramped room with only a wardrobe, a table, and some sort of door to another very small room next to the wardrobe.

“And?” Silver Shine asked with his eyebrows raised as if checking if everything was alright.

“Did he behave?” Flame Bash threw his half-joke and half-question.

However, they quickly realised that something happened and that I indeed didn't behave. Their smiles were quickly gone.

“Somehow he got the keys to his cage and tried to escape. Storm Silk was hanging around the office so he noticed that, and broke down the door to get inside to try to stop him. The raider beat the shit out of him,” As he said that he pulled me by the chain as if to show me to them, “but when he tried to finish Storm Silk off. Fortunately, the mayor left the shock collar remote in the office, so Storm managed to get it and electrocuted him until he went unconscious."

When Bear Hearts finished talking, I looked to the side.

So that’s what they told him. Storm Silk’s smart, he must have had it all planned. The realisation only reinforced my sense of danger.

“I told you it was a bad idea.” Flame Bash said while Silver Shine stood up, and approached Bear Hearts.

“Flame’s right. If the raider killed Storm Silk–”

“If. He didn’t and got his whole neck burned to a crisp as a lesson. I won't let him out of my sight next time.”

“Bear, it wasn’t even a day, and your good-intentioned attempt to help one pony almost killed another one. We need to get rid of him before he tries to kill somepony again.” Bear Hearts visibly deflated and lowered his head, and Silver Shine looked at me over Bear Heats' shoulder.

What? No! I have to say something to save my ass! but they won't fucking believe me. What can I say? What can I say?!

“He’s just a foal, that’s what they’ve taught him.” He said softly and resigned as if he knew Silver Shine was right.

“You don’t have to do it, I and Flame Bash will hand him over to the mayor,” Silver Shine placed a hoof on Bear Hearts’ shoulder and waited for his response.

Bear Hearts, without raising his head, slowly reached with his hoof, unhooked the chain from the ring on his armour, and passed the chain’s tip to Silver Shine. He grabbed it in his blue magic and levitated it next to himself while going around Bear Hearts to exit onto the corridor.

No! No no no no!

“No! It wasn’t like that!” I frantically protested as Silver Shine passed me, “Storm Silk tried to kill me!” Silver Shine just started going down the stairs, not paying attention to what I was saying. The chain tightened, which resulted in the collar painfully pulling me by my burned neck while I struggled to pull the chain backwards on the threshold of the stairs. “Ahh-he electrocuted me until I passed out!”

Silver Shine turned and looked up the stairs at me and leaned against the wall “Stop fucking lying,“ he said calmly, and pulled me by the chain hard. It made me lose my balance. I fell from the floor onto the stairs with my chest and hit my jaw, everything turned into a blur as I tumbled down them hitting the edges of the stairs with almost all parts of the body, and then hit the wall that was right at the end of the stairs. Flame Bash stood leaning on the railing while Bear Hearts still stood turned back towards us as he did when he gave away the chain

My whole body ached in various places from the fall, but I had it worse, so I quickly got up and stood towards Silver Shine still going down the stairs.

Fuck it’s not gonna work! He won’t believe me, and I'm sure I can't run away either!

“Okay, I tried to escape! But I wasn’t gonna kill Storm Silk! I just wanted to leave him beaten on the floor!” I shouted at him.

He continued to go down the stairs without a word.

Maybe I should just throw myself at him and kill him? I desperately thought. No, they’d shock me and it would be the seal over my grave!

His blue magic enveloped his horn and the chain again, and he started to pull me towards the exit. the pressure on my burn made me groan that almost became a scream.

“Ahh!” I groaned, “S-stop! I-I will Ahh! help you look for the guy who got lost in the forest!” I tried desperately as he pulled me with his magic into the vestibule while walking behind me.

“So that we have to worry about you backstabbing us instead of focusing on actually looking? Sure,”

“I won’t! I-I Aghhh! I swear!” I said, groaning while he pulled me towards the entrance door.

The pulling direction changed, the chanid started pulling me into the corner of the vestibule, and then upwards. It lifted the front half of my body in the air and pushed my back into the corner. Shortly after, Silver Shine came over and stood, watching me stand upright on my hind legs in the corner, while groaning from the painful burn being pulled on, from a safe distance.

“This is your last chance, raider. You do one more wrong move, one!” He lifted his hoof, gesturing the number, and a white remote control with a large red button levitated out of his pocket and landed on his hoof. “There will be no more shocking, I'll just straight blow your head off. Do you understand?” He asked while pulling the collar up even harder

Oh, Celestia how does somepony so calm sound so intimidating?

“Ye-egh-s!” I groaned with difficulty.

His magic lifted me by the chain from the ground completely and then slammed me on the wooden floor with my back. The impact made it difficult for me to breathe.

“Let’s see how much a raider’s word is worth,” he said calmly as usual while turning away and leaving the vestibule, “Don’t you dare move until I come back,” he said as he closed the vestibule door behind him.

I lay there trying to catch my breath, once I was breathing normally, I indeed didn't dare to move a muscle. I just put my head on the floor and clenched my eyes and felt myself become angry.

I’m so pathetic! Fuck! Swearing to him?! And now I’m too scared to move!?

I’m no fucking raider! I’m a fucking… failure…

I just… Why can’t everypony just leave me alone!?

I need to hold out until Scythe gets back somehow.

***

I walked next to Bear Hearts between ominous large black silhouettes of dead trees on the yellowy mossy undergrowth that grew on the forest floor through the Windbreaker forest. For some reason Silver Shine told Bear Hearts to not chain me, so I was free to move. I don’t know why. I don’t care. It’s not what I was thinking about right now.

Bars wouldn’t care if he had a mom strapped to his neck. That crazy bastard would throw himself at Bear Hearts the second he turned his head away.

His friends are nowhere close! Throw yourself at him, come on, take revenge for him almost crushing your head with a shotgun barrel! Be a real raider! – I encouraged myself.

But I continued to walk obediently next to Bear Hearts

I only looked at him when he was looking away so as not to provoke him. Now wasn’t that just pathetic? It definitely made me feel like that.

In the clan, I always tried to prove to everypony that I was a proper raider. It was hard, and I had to learn a lot, but eventually, I thought I became one: Bold, strong, and feared.

I was often afraid, that wasn’t new. But it was the first time I surrendered to it. Turns out that without my clan I was a fucking coward.

I don’t fucking know anymore. Am I a real raider, if without a clan, I can’t bring myself to act like one? Was I ever one?

Being hungry, and a feeling of a slight withdrawal only added to the feeling of hopelessness. It all resulted in me not having either the physical or the mental strength to do anything towards escaping, or proving I’m a raider to Scythe.

I’ll just walk where he wants me to, and keep quiet while Bear Hearts looks around. Then we’ll come back, I’ll get some sleep and food, and I’ll try to think of something then.

But I doubt I’ll take Scythe this long to get a gun and come back… He’d probably kill the first pony he met to get a gun…

Maybe he’s already here? And just waiting for the right moment?

We walked like this for a few moments, Bear Hearts looked around for the husband of that crying mare from the office and I just followed him with my head low. My stomach gurgled every now and then, and I was so hungry, I just felt sick. I wish I could vomit. Not that it would help or anything. I need to get something to eat or I think I’ll pass out.

Bear Heart turned his head to the left, towards me, and looked at me curiously “Maybe now you’ll finally tell me your name, raider?”

What does he want my name for? To gain some leverage against me or something? I don’t like it.

“No,” I said flatly while looking straight ahead, ignoring his gaze.

“Why not?” He asked calmly.

“What the fuck do you want from me?” I said quietly with irritation and finally looked up at his face.

“Your name,” he said as if it was the most obvious thing in the wasteland.

“Bullshit. You fucking refuse to kill me, constantly ask questions, and now the grey one said you’re trying to help me. What is in it for you?” That took him aback, and he stared at me with a puzzled expression for a moment.

“I don’t want anything from you,” he said as convincingly as if he believed it himself

“Stop fucking with me, soon after, you'll want something in return, or fucking… I don’t know yet.”

“I just want to help you, just that.”

He doesn’t want to tell me? Fine.

I turned my head away from him in a sweeping manner, letting him know that I didn't believe him, which he noticed, and furrowed his brow “Listen what are you, seventeen maybe? I have foals myself, a raider, and I know they don’t do anything except for what they were taught. They simply don’t know better.”

“Fuck you, I’m not a foal,”

“You’re not a foal, but you’re young enough for that to still apply to you. ”

I didn’t argue. Maybe that was the truth, I didn't know, and I didn’t care right now. What I did know is that I really needed to get something to eat. My stomach gurgled again loudly, and as I didn’t want to ask my captor for anything, and also because I was sure he wouldn’t give me anything to eat, not for free at least, I started to wonder about the nutritional properties of the yellowish moss that grew everywhere on the ground. It can’t be that bad right? Maybe I could just try a bit and see if it’s edible? I definitely would prefer something meaty though.

“When did you last eat something?” Bear Hearts asked, seeing me move away and sniff a large dense pocket of moss we were passing.

Such a stupid question, really pissed me off, “Oh I don’t fucking know, it’s so hard to deduce,” I started Ironically with irritation, “Did you see any of you give me food for the last two fucking days?” I finished with anger.

The expression of embarrassment looked funny on such a large pony, but it quickly disappeared. Bear Hearts stopped and put his hoof into one of his saddlebags, “Why won’t we make a deal then? “ He fished out an apple and showed it to me. At the mere sight of that beautiful juicy fruit, which at that moment seemed to be the tastiest and most saturating food in the entire wasteland, I felt a tingle in my mouth. “I will give you food, and in return, you will answer my questions,” he raised one of his brows.

Fuck I knew it. Do I let him extract information from me just like that? For mere food? I don't like it - I thought without taking my eyes off the apple.

I couldn’t stand the hunger any longer though, so I didn’t think too long though. “Fine!” I agreed hastily, but unwillingly, “Give me the apple first.”

He didn’t argue and passed the apple to me. I took the whole thing in my mouth, put it on the ground, and ate as fast as I could. As if it was the first food in days. Well, actually it was. While I savoured the wonderful sweetness of some bites, and the invigorating sourness of others, chewing quickly and swallowing even faster, licking my face after each, Bear Hearts stood above me.

After I was finished, he got moving again, and I followed, still licking my face, to scoop any traces left of the sweet apple juice. I still was pretty hungry, but it was more bearable now. I even started feeling a little bit better, If only I also got my hooves on a booze or something…

“Why are you so distrustful?” Bear Hearts asked, walking to my right and looking at me.

I knew I didn’t have to answer, I could just say ‘fuck you’ and that would be it. But gaining at least a little bit of his trust could be very helpful in the future.

I walked silently for a moment, “Habits from the clan,” I said shortly.

“Why?” he turned his head, “You couldn’t trust your own clanmates?”

“Everyone was only looking out only for their own interests, and would fuck you over at every possible opportunity,” I said evenly looking straight into his eyes - letting him know that I expect the same from him.

He didn’t react to my look, but the answer got him confused. “That’s ridiculous, why would anypony stay in a clan like that?”

“You can’t raid villages if you’re alone,” I said briefly.

“Is that… Why you stuck with your clan?” He said carefully.

“That’s enough for an apple,” I finished and looked away from him. But he wanted more, so he put a hoof in his saddlebag again, and took out a can with something written on it.

“And for this?” He asked.

I stared at the can for a moment. I saw these before, but I didn’t remember what they had on the inside, and the writing on it was undecryptable to me. “What is that?”

“Pre-war banana soup, It's written here, can’t you se–”

“Yeah, yeah, I see, give it to me,” I quickly took the can, placed it on the mossy ground, and started wrestling with it, trying to open it. I bit it from the top, tried to bite through the lid, put my hoof around it, and tried to rotate it while holding on to it with my teeth. Bear Hearst patiently stood above me waiting. I didn’t pay him any attention.

“Do you want help with that?” he finally asked after a few minutes.

I took the can out of my mouth, “I don’t need your help,” I said, and took the can in my mouth again. I sat down, took the can in both of my hooves and started smashing it against a rock I saw laying nearby

“You look like you do.”

I ignored him and kept smashing the can against the rocks. I don’t intend to ask him for help. Worst case scenario I’ll carry the can with me.

Finally, the lid cracked and bent inwards, some of the soup leaked out before I could turn the can upwards, but not a lot. Whatever was inside the can, It was good. Nowhere close to the apple, or I just was that hungry, but it was still good banana mush. We got moving again after I emptied the can and bear hearts looked at me again.

“So?”

“What?”

“Why did you stay there?” he asked curiously

“I don’t know, I just did.”

“Didn’t you ever want to leave? To try to live… I don’t know, differently?” he suggested

“Maybe I did.”

“So why didn’t you leave?” He asked confused

“What are these fucking questions huh?” I asked irritated

“I'm just trying to understand what held you there!”

“The clan was all I ever knew, Is it so hard to fucking imagine? And I knew I didn't have a chance for a ‘normal’ life.”

“Why not?”

I snorted a laugh. “Me having a normal life? Maybe you need a pair of fucking glasses? Who would want a raider like me huh?”

That surprised him, and he raised his eyebrows, “I didn’t say anything about a relationship.”

I opened my eyes wide and immediately looked away from him. Fuck!

He looked at me as if with pity, but a light smile. “I think you could have a normal life you think about,” He said softly “raider’” he added… jokingly?

Change the fucking subject! “Why the fuck did you say ‘raider’ like that!?” I quickly demanded an explanation

“Because you’re not a real raider. I don’t think you ever were.”

“Fuck you!” I said defensively, but I was glad he didn’t hold onto the previous subject.

“It’s a good thing. That means you’re not too fucked up for anything yet,” he explained

“Just… shut the fuck up.”

The conversation, despite his bulshittery about not wanting anything in return, planted two questions in my mind

Am I really not a raider? And, Could I be in a relationship?

The first one was worrying. But the next one almost completely erased that feeling, and replaced it with a slight hope.

I never thought somepony would think that I could be in a relationship.

Could I?

I turned away from Bear Hearts so he didn’t see the light smile made its way on my face.

Despite all the bullshit he said, what he said made me feel… good!

A raider that wants a relationship. That’s something you don’t see every day eh? Glad nopony from the clan is here to see this.

***

We walked in silence for around an hour more. Bear Hearts looked around, and in doing so, glanced at me and held his gaze for a couple of seconds from time to time, It was annoying, who knows what is he thinking about me while he stares at me? But despite that, I started feeling better and ready for action again. It's probably because I finally ate something, and by action, I mean looking for a way to escape. I even started looking around for the husband of that crying mare as well, even though I had no idea what I was looking for. All in all, it was coming together well. I’m helping them with something, so maybe they will relax a little around me, which will eventually make the escape easier, and at the same time, I'm not left in a cage like on a silver platter for Storm Silk.

I just wonder, why didn’t he kill me yesterday when he obviously could? I was unconscious! It doesn’t get any easier than that! Maybe he and the Mayor decided to just leave me be? And he won’t bother me again? I don't know, but I don't want to be left alone to see if I'm wrong. I have to stick to Bear Hearts and his friends. At least until Scythe comes back

It’s weird. I want to kill them. A lot. Okay maybe Bear Hearts not that much, and at the same time, I feel a bit safer with them than without them.

I don’t even want to kill Bear Hearts that much… Why? He almost crushed my head with a barrel! And killed my clan! So why don't I want to skin him alive? I don’t fucking know. Is that what a raider would do–

A not-very-distant gunshot rang out, then another one, and then it started to sound like a proper shootout with at least a couple of ponies involved.

Oh! I wonder who’s shooting who.

Bear Hearts abruptly turned his head in the direction from which the shots filled the air with an irregular beat. His face turned serious, and he looked at me.

“We’re going there” he pointed a hoof towards the direction of the noise, “ You run first and I follow you. Don't get out of my sight,” he said firmly. I rolled my eyes and started trotting casually towards the noise. I wasn’t in a hurry. I’d let them shoot each other out and then see what happened. And if it’s Silver Shine and Flame Bash getting shot right now, then maybe life finally blessed me with something positive.

“Faster!” Bear Hearts rushed me aggressively. He must be worried about his friends. Uh, fine. I accelerated to a gallop while avoiding dead trees and jumping over stones covered with yellowish moss. I wonder how long he can hold the pace? I expected to hear ‘slow down!’ or something similar at any moment, but after a few minutes of running I turned my head to see Bear Hearts panting very heavily, but still keeping up with me.

With that heavy armour of his? Quite impressive.

The gunshots were becoming more and more clear, and I became more and more excited. Fight! A real fight! Finally!

“Raider! Stop!” I heard somepony shout on my right side. I looked there and saw Silver Shine, some other white pony, and Flame Bash. All of them taking cover behind trees.

Aw, damn it! They didn’t get shot yet. I should have run slower.

I felt a big hoof grab me by the collar, the burn on my neck reminded me of itself, and with a loud ‘Oowwwww!’ coming from me, I was dragged behind the nearest tree by Bear Hearts just as bullets started wheezing past me. We both leaned back against the tree and looked at the rest of our ‘team’.

“Three slavers behind a cart full of ponies” Flame Bash shouted to us.

I massaged my neck for a moment while hearing Bear Hearts clank his gun and do some abrupt moves, after the searing pain disappeared from my neck, I peeked from behind the tree, and indeed, I saw a cart, but only one pony leaning out from behind the car dressed in some black/red armour and aiming towards us.

I quickly leaned back behind my tree and looked at Bear Hearts. He was switching the shotgun for an assault rifle on the railing attached to his battle saddle.

He noticed my look, “Stay here, and don’t do anything,” he said without stopping what he was doing.

I looked at him, and then at Silver Shine and Flame Bash, both constantly either shooting or hiding behind trees while bullets chipped their covers and flew closely to them.

With pleasure! All I have to do is wait. They will shoot each other eventually, and then I’ll be free to go. Perfect!

So I waited. Minutes passed as both sides constantly shot and dived for cover right after that. Bear Hearts even put on some kind of bulletproof helmet. And even with protection like that he just fired a burst and hid behind our tree. It didn't look like it was gonna end anytime soon unless one of the sides ran out of ammunition, so I had a lot of time. I just sat behind the tree and thought of different scenarios this situation can lead into. If the slavers kill Bear Hearts’ team, I can just run into the forest, meet Scythe, and be free. If Bear Hearts’ team wins, I’ll stay imprisoned. But If I help them win… maybe I could gain a little of their trust…

A big If.

Have they killed any of these slavers already? It’s been a while, and If they managed to kill a whole raider clan on their own, this shouldn’t be a problem for them…

I leaned out from the tree and saw a cart full of captured ponies who lay on the cart’s floor hoping that they wouldn't get accidentally shot, and a dead slaver wearing black and red armour lying next to it in a pool of blood.

I guess that’s why it’s taking so long, they are afraid to shoot, to not hurt the captured ponies…

I suddenly felt a piercing pain in my shoulder and fell on my back from the impact.

“Ah, Fuck!” I shouted and hissed from the sharp pain radiating from my shoulder to my neck, chest, and my right foreleg.

“Stay down!” Bear Hearts shouted to me, then he said something about helping me and fired a couple of single shots towards the slavers, but I wasn’t listening to him anymore.

That fucking cocksucker! I’ll fucking show them!

I got up as fast as I could ignoring the pain, and started sprinting towards a tree that was nearest to the cart.

“Stay down! They’ll kill you!” Bear Hearts shouted to me, which I promptly ignored

I’ll fucking get that motherfucker, just have to wait until he finishes his magazine. I thought while I ran up to the tree, and readied myself to sprint at the slavers at any second while listening to the rhythmic gunshots.

– Bam, Bam, Bam… … … Bam, Bam, Bam, Bam, Bam, Bam…– Now!

I ran out from behind the tree and sprinted to the cart. One of the slavers was not reloading and shot at me, but everyone in the forest suddenly started shooting at him at once, so he quickly hid behind the cart. I heard him shout ‘somepony’s running at us!’’ to the other slaver. As I was closing in on the cart, I saw the other one stick his stupid fucking horned face together with his gun levitating next to it. I was close enough to pounce at him before he had time to aim at me.

I've got you now you motherfucker!

I threw myself at him, his focus shattered and as we painfully rolled behind the cart together, I heard his gun clatter on the asphalt behind me. After we fell on the ground next to each other, I tried to get up as fast as possible to get on top of him before he could collect himself together. But the searing pain in my shoulder didn’t make it easy at all. During the couple seconds more it took me to get up because of it, the slaver managed to get up, and without thinking long, he pushed me onto my side, got atop of me, and then started beating me all over my face with his hooves. I lay sideways, his weight painfully squeezing and pressing my chest and back into the hard asphalt, with a heavier pony atop of me, blocking his punches would be pointless. Instead, while taking all of his punches straight into my face, I tried to strike him in his face too, or any other weak points without defending myself at all. Every blow I took caused a shock, my counterpunches went wild, but I did feel that I hit him too from time to time.

"Winch! Move away from him so I can shoot him!" Shouted the first slaver to the one atop of me. This made him pause for a moment, he stopped punching and I felt that the pressure on my stomach and chest quickly disappeared.

No, you’re not fucking getting away you motherfucker. It’s not gonna be that easy!

I lunged at him and bit the first unarmoured part of his body I could see as he was trying to get off me. I got his leg. I dug in my teeth just above the hoof and started moving my jaw, trying to bite off his hoof, or at least get to the bone. The strong taste of blood that quickly filled my mouth confirmed that I was going in the right direction. He started screaming and started beating me with the other hoof blindly as he tried to back off.

Oh, he panicked. Good! Things always get easier when they panic.

As he tried to back off, I followed, the other slaver quickly coming to help his friend. I felt him punching me on the back of my head with one hoof, and the other one he wrapped around my stomach and tried to pull me away. We all fell out from behind the cover of the cart and fell on the ground again.

“Shoot! Shoot him-aaaah!” The one I was biting screamed as I landed atop him. Just a short moment later, I felt the specific texture of bone under my teeth. Time to find a new spot to bite.

The slaver’s friend let go of my stomach, I felt the punches from behind stop and heard the slaver’s magic, a gun crack and the sounds of reloading from behind me.

“Freeze!” I heard the voice of Bear Hearts muffled by his helmet almost at the same time.

Hah, good! He’ll take care of the other one!

I let go of the slaver’s leg, and as I was about to bite the next unarmoured part of his body I saw – his face, he instantly raised both of his hooves.

“I surrender! I surrender!” He shouted to me, and then in the direction of Bear Hearts, who at that moment was in a standoff against the other slaver.

Oh good, because today I was feeling like… I know! Popping somepony’s head open!

I hope you’re watching, Scythe,

I smiled widely. “That’s cute,” I told him and grabbed his head in both of my hooves. He used this moment to hit me in the muzzle with his hoof, but I didn’t let go. I lifted his head and hit it against the asphalt floor with all my strength. it stunned him for a moment, and at that moment, I lifted his head and hit his head on the asphalt again. And again, He started screaming. Which I ignored, I listened to the empty bam sound of the skull hitting the bloodied asphalt every time, waiting for the satisfying crack that I was sure I would hear any second now.

Shame Scythe doesn’t see this.

The slaver’s scream died down after every bam. I did it again, Lift, and smash bam. He got a little quieter. Nothing? Lift, and smash, bam.

“Stop!” I heard Bear Hearts shout somewhere close to my right. Hah, sure asshole.

“I-I surre–” he moaned out.

Yes, I know. You told me before.

Lift, and smash, bam. He got quieter. Come on! Don’t keep me waiting! Crack already! I want to hear it! I lifted his head again, and “

– “Plea”–he took a shallow breath–”ase” he said quietly.

I froze. And something weird happened. I still wanted to smash his head, but suddenly at that moment, at the same time, I didn’t.

Fury welled up in me

Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fucking do it! I want to hear the crack!

But I just held his head and stared at the slaver half closing his eyes.

No, I won't be getting soft! I’m not soft! I have to kill him! I want to! I will! I am a real raider! I can prove it!

“That’s enough!” Angry and breathless Bear Hearts shouted straight at my face.

I pushed his hoof away and jumped back onto the lying slaver.

Everything in my mind screamed at me to finish him, to hurt him, and I wanted to, I wanted to crush his skull! It’s almost done, and that would be the end!

Bear Hearts yanked me by the collar again, and slapped me in the face, "You want a life you dream about? Then control yourself!" He screamed furiously right at my face.

Fuck! I promised I would control myself!

Fuck me! Fuck you! You fucking asshole!

He held me by the collar and looked into my eyes. I gasped from the fatigue, and bloodlust still bubbling up inside me, while I looked back at him. In the time, Silver Shine, Flame Bash, and the white pony that was with them before either ran up to the half-conscious slaver or got to opening the cart to let go the ponies held inside. Eventually, Bear Hearts let me go but watched me carefully.

I took a few steps away from him and the cart. I wanted to smash his head so much right now. I felt a need to do it, and I was furious that I couldn’t bring myself to do it. I knew Bear Hearts was right, and I made a fucking promise to myself too! Not sure whether to let go or jump in there again, I made two small circles. Towards the lying salver, and away again. Then I furiously walked away. Seeing that, Bear Hearts visibly relaxed.

I had to take out the physical pain I felt on something or else I felt I would blow the fuck up.

I walked towards the body of the slaver that was already dead when I ran up to the cart, picked up his gun, quite a heavy bolt action rifle, and started smashing it against the ground while cursing loudly for a few good minutes. I wanted nothing to be left of this weapon, and occupied my mind with that. One by one, every part of the rifle fell off, the springs and small pieces of metal fell out of the breach, the magazine fell off, the wooden stock cracked and slipped, and at the end, I was left with only a bent barrel in my hooves. Then I smelled something. Cigarettes! I looked to the ground, trying to locate the source of the smell, and saw one burning next to the slaver’s corpse. I knew he must have had more on him, so I searched his body and found a pack of them. I quickly got one in my mouth and I set him on fire with the lighter he had with him, and took a long puff, by the scratching in my lungs, I knew these were the stronger kind, good. After a few puffs, I had to sit down. The tingling throughout the body and the pleasant dizziness calmed me down. Without the anger or bloodlust, my breath slowed, the pain in my arm became just unpleasant, and I could feel the droplets of blood falling off my face and shoulder.

Maybe I’m really not a raider?

Just like Scythe said. I’m a pile of shit.

I turned around to look at the cart and saw a lot of commotion. The ponies released from the cart were walking around, talking loudly, and digging through the stuff that the slavers had with them. I saw them taking weapons and clothes, I even saw somepony grab a very big and weird-looking skull that was still dripping with something. - But most importantly, they kept my captors occupied. Silver Shine was busy with the slaver that I almost killed, Flame Bash was doing something inside the cart, and Bear Hearts was busy with freed the ponies around him

They wouldn't even notice if I just…

I slowly turned to the left and faced the forest on the left side of the road, but I didn’t move.

If not for the Bomb collar, nothing was stopping me from just slowly walking away into the forest. They wouldn’t find me.

But even If I escape, what then? I don’t have a future among normal ponies.

The only thing I could do when I’m free would be just getting back to killing.

But do I really want that?

Then I heard the bushes moving, and to my surprise, Scythe leaned his head out of them. He pressed a hoof to his mouth, signalling me to be quiet. Then, he presented a pistol on his hoof and pointed at me twice.

I frowned not knowing what was that supposed to mean.

Is he going to shoot me? Or is the gun for me?

But before I could do anything, he was gone.

***

I smoked another cigarette and waited looking at the forest from time to time. Finally, after some loud shouts from Silver Shine, everypony started forming a column, Flame Bash and Silver Shine were in the lead, and Bear Heart at the back. In the middle walked around a dozen ponies freed from the wagon, two of them were pulling the wagon itself. I assumed we were going back to the town.

I wasn’t intending to let Bear Hearts think he trained me like a dog, so I joined the column somewhere around in the middle. The ponies in the column seeing me, a bloodied pony who just a while ago almost smashed a slaver’s skull against the asphalt, moved away from me leaving a metre radius of empty space between me and them. I just walked and didn’t look at anypony else. It did make me smile though. Ponies being scared of me made me feel better, stronger. Something like that.

Walking, even slowly, wasn’t the most pleasant thing in the world. I limped slightly, my shot shoulder hurt, and I was pretty sure I had a bullet stuck inside. Fortunately, it almost doesn’t bleed anymore. I'll have to discreetly give Bear Hearts an idea of getting it out of me without me asking for it. But later. I can manage walking like this to the town.

I wonder if they give up on looking for the lost guy tomorrow. There’s just no way he’s still alive after three days. Even more with everypony talking about that hedger like it’s some very dangerous threat.

Shame, I wanted to see who that mare was crying about so hard.

I suddenly felt a sharp pain in my shoulder and hissed. I started limping more intensely to relieve my right foreleg a bit more and looked at it. It started bleeding all over again.

Fuck

I need to get that at least bandaged. I could ask Bear Herts for a potion or something. He would probably give me something.

But I don’t intend to ask him for anything.

As I limped and walked along the column I started looking around for something. At the ponies walking beside me, in front of me, behind me, at the cart, at the ground. I just needed to bandage that shoulder, for now, any piece of cloth would do.

A battered darkish blue unicorn stallion wearing a white ragged shirt and brown saddlebags, with a face of a criminal, a short dimm yellow mane and sad but vibrant amber-coloured eyes noticed me looking around frantically.

“Is everything okay?” He asked while entering the empty space between me and the other rescued ponies, while glancing at my bloodied shoulder and face.

I don’t need your help.

“Mind your own business,” I said dismissively and went back to looking ahead at nothing in particular.

“But you’re bleeding”

“It’s not my blood” I looked him in the eyes and smiled nastily.

“Listen, I can see you’re hurt. You’re limping, ” he said irritatedly, “I can help.”

Now that lit a red lamp. He wants something from me, otherwise, he wouldn’t want to help me so much. Why else would anypony help a raider?

I’d tell him to fuck off but, I really could use something to fix that shoulder…

“You’re hurt yourself, so the fuck you want?” I asked and looked him in the eyes.

“The fuck you mean what I want!?” he burst, but took a deep breath, and resumed calmly, “I see you’re hurt. I just want to help you.”

Like I’m talking to Bear Hearts all over fucking again!

With each step, I felt the stabbing pain in my shoulder more and more, which made me limp equally more.

Okay fuck, what am I scared of here? Even if he’ll want something in exchange later, I can just tell him to fuck off. It’s not the clan, he’s not gonna beat me up because of that later.

“Okay, You want to help me? The last pony in the column. A big brown pony. Go ask him for a bandage. He’ll give you something for sure ”

“Why won’t you go ask yourself?”

“He… He wouldn’t give it to me if I asked.”

“You need to treat that wound fast.” He grabbed the sleeve of his shirt with his teeth and tore it off, levitated it out of his mouth with his yellow magic, and began bandaging my shoulder with it. I was too surprised to say anything.

“I don’t have any bandages, but at least that’s what I can do,” he said, focusing on tying the cloth

What.

He finished tying the piece of cloth and looked at my face closely.

I looked at the red stain on the bandage that was rapidly getting bigger and bigger. “And you want nothing in exchange?” I asked suspiciously.

“No!” he replied annoyed

We walked in silence for a moment. Does he really want nothing?

If he didn’t want anything, and to be fair, he didn't give me a reason not to believe him, then I guess I should say something right? Do something for him in exchange?

I felt like I should.

The thought reminded me of it constantly. Like something was scratching me on the head. It became more unbearable than the pain in my shoulder

I turned to him a couple of times, trying to say something, but I didn’t know what. I knew I had to do something in exchange!

As much as I don’t want to say it. I don’t think I have any other choice…

The words felt like a cinder block was going through my throat.

I looked at him and…

…

“Thanks,” I said and quickly turned my head away from him.

He instantly turned towards me and looked at me shocked for a moment. “I… I didn’t think I would hear something like this from a… somepony like you.”

“Shut the fuck up or I’ll tear your throat out with my teeth.”

After that, a long pause followed before he said anything.

“Why did you help me?” I asked curiously

He made a big circle with his head, and faced me “I don’t want anything! Do you not understand?”

“I fucking get it! But why did you do it then?.” I said while nodding my head.

He calmed down and his face softened “Oh… Well… I always help. As much as I can.”

“Well that’s a stupid fucking rule, you’ll get used by everypony.”

“Okay.” he shrugged

“What? The fuck?”

“I don’t care about that.” he turned his amber eyes away from me

“Did you fall on your fucking head? Do you have no self-respect? no dignity?”

I was clearly making him angry, but he didn't lash out at me or anything. “No, I don’t.”

I looked at him in disbelief. Seeing that he sighed and looked at the ground.

“I was a slaver before… I caught and sold ponies into slavery, where they worked for the rest of their lives, and usually died. That’s… That’s how I’m trying to make up for it.”

“Oh, you think it’s going to make a difference?”

“You think it won’t?”

I remembered my conversation with Scythe.

“Listen, do you actually think anypony would want you in their life? Knowing what you did?” I asked him.

He looked me confidently in the eyes, “There always will be ponies that will forgive you, as long as you try to make up for the wrong things you did.”

“And you really believe that?”

He just sighed and shrugged.

“And what made you change your ways?” I asked out of pure curiosity.

He’s punishing himself because he wants to? Because he believes that someday somepony will forgive him. That’s crazy. He’s crazy. What logic is there? Everypony will still hate him anyway!

Crazy. He’s crazy.

I wonder…

“What made you change your ways?” I asked indifferently, out of pure curiosity.

He wanted to say something, but he didn’t, only after a moment he replied. “You wouldn’t get it right now.”

“And how can you know?” I said with irritation. Does he think I’m too stupid?

“Because it’s guilt. And I can see that you feel none.”

I just shrugged. Why would I feel guilt? All I ever did, I did because I was taught that way. I never had a choice, so It’s not my fault. Simple.

Suddenly the former slaver turned his head towards somepony, and then he quickly looked at me.

"You will be alright?" He asked me, in a tone which suggested he knew what I was going to say

"Yes"

He nodded and walked away from me towards the front of the column disappearing among the other ponies. I heard him ask somepony 'Are you alright?' before I completely lost track of him.

I guess there are a lot of weirdos even outside raider clans.

***

Silver Shine had to send someone ahead to notify the mayor

When we arrived, a weird picture greeted my eyes. As we entered the city and walked the main street towards the mayor’s office, we saw ponies from all over the town standing on the streets holding blankets, baskets with bread and water in bottles or other containers. The rescued ponies who needed something came to the inhabitants of the city and were instantly offered shelter, food, or any other kind of support. Why would these towns ponies do any of that, I couldn’t even begin to understand. I had no idea what any of these ponies would get out of doing that.

Why else would they do it?

It resulted in a small chaos. Ponies were walking in random directions, searching for their friends, or looking if anypony had what they needed at the moment. Instead of going to the end of the street where the inhabitants stood with the offerings, I sat down to relieve my no longer bleeding shoulder amid the ponies chaotically walking around me in all directions. I could only wait for Bear Hearts or his friends to take me somewhere.

Then I heard a familiar sound. A cry that I knew well.

I stood up, raised my head as high as possible and stood on the tips of my hooves to see better. I saw the yellow mare who lost her husband crying while running from the direction of the mayor’s office towards the newly arrived ponies.

We got distracted by the slavers and didn’t find her husband, she's in for quite a disappointment.

Shame, I was curious about him… Wait.

She wasn’t just crying. As she ran, I looked at the corners of her mouth, they were curled into a smile.

She was crying of happiness? I was confused until I saw a darkish blue unicorn start running towards her, and then hug her tightly.

That’s her husband? Heh, I guess we got really lucky he was there with the slavers then. How did he even get there…

Wait a moment. I recognise that pony. That’s… No way. Him?! She cried so much after a… a… former slaver?! That’s…

I didn't know whether to feel disappointed, shocked, or… I didn't know.

This is the ‘good pony’ she talked about? He was a Slaver! Suddenly he started acting all good and helpful and she forgot about that?!

I watched as they hugged each other without paying attention to the ponies moving and talking around them.

She did!

“Raider!” I heard the voice of Bear Hearts from somewhere in the crowd behind me.

Fuck off for a moment would you.

If a mare can love a former slaver…

I relaxed and felt like all of the worries I had before left my body.

“Raider, we’re going, “ Bear Hearts said from behind me. Fuck off right now! I’m having a big moment here! Don’t you have fucking something else to do right now or something?!

But I knew I had to listen, and it was fucking irritating! Most Ponies were slightly taller than me, so as I lowered my head to a comfortable position and came off the tops of my hooves, the embracing couple got obscured by ponies walking around the street. I turned towards Bear Hearts without a word and slightly lowered my eyelids. But the good feelings didn’t leave, even despite this inconvenience.

He nodded his head to his left, “ Come, you can enjoy your good deed later. Right now we need to take care of your shoulder.”

Enjoy the good deed? “Fuck o–” I swallowed the curse.

Oh…

I was pleasantly surprised. I didn’t expect him to remember about me being hurt, even more, him wanting to take care of that. Limping, I followed him, ponies around us gave way, and seeing me, they began to talk to each other.

I didn’t care, I felt good!

I might have a chance!

***

We sat in the hotel room where Bear Hearts and his team were staying. It was not too big, but enough for three ponies, with four of us it started to get a bit crowded, but it was manageable. The wooden floor was patched with various boards from different trees, The walls and ceiling were white, freshly painted with lime mortar. The whole room was lit with a proper light hanging from the ceiling, instead of just a lightbulb. Fancy.

Bear Hearts and Silver Shine sat on their beds, and Flame Bash sat over me while I lay on my back on old newspapers layed on the floor next to Bear Hearts’ fancy navy blue armour. He asked Flame Bash to take the bullet out of my shoulder, and after a lively exchange, he agreed under some circumstances. One of them was that I don’t get to lie on a bed.

Asshole.

I’m pretty sure that one of these circumstances also was that I get no anaesthesia because–

A sharp pain burst in my shoulder for a split second, “Augh!”, I groaned, “ Just do it with your fucking horn!”

“Shut up raider, “ Flame Bash said with a serious focused face while changing the positions of the tweezers levitating in his orange magic in the wound in my shoulder.

I was just a touch, nothing terrible. It doesn't hurt that much, the pain’s in the head. – I repeated to myself as Flame Bash stared straight at my Shoulder, with a still-focused face.

I was sure he was using tweezers just to torture me. In the clan, they did it with just their horns! Just look at the joy in his eyes! Bear Hearts! Do something!

“So, where’s our next stop? ” Bear Hearts asked Silver Shine while ignoring the dirty gaze I gave him, in the hopes he'd do something.

“We’re going along the river northeast deeper into Fillington, towards the coastal frontline.”

“Any roads there?”

“Yes, an intercity road, a highway, and railroad tracks. Plenty of options.”

“Oh good, I hate tearing through bushes. ”

Ever since seeing the yellow mare with the slaver, I had a question in my mind.

“Shed some pounds then, it will be easier for you to squeeze between trees,” Flame Bash joked, and all of them chuckled.

“Hey, “I said to grab their attention, but got no reaction, “Hey!”

Everypony fell silent, the only sounds were the distant tapping of the ceiling fan in the reception and a faint creaking of the floorboards in the corridor outside of the room. Even Flame Bash stopped to glance at my face. I took a deep breath, “How long do you plan to keep me as your dog?” I said unpleasantly with a slight pretension while turning my head sideways towards them so I could see their faces. They all stayed, and Flame Bash began to rummage in my shoulder again.

“As long as we need to” Silver Shine replied after a few seconds.

“You’re not our dog,” Bear Hearts added.

“For what?” I asked, looking at Silver Shine.

“For you to stop being an unpredictable murderer, which you showed you are today.” He said matter of factly

I looked back at the ceiling again. Fuck. I'll have to wait for Scythe then.

Then a gunshot rang across the room, wooden splinters flew in from the door, which the next second got kicked open. I didn’t even have time to get up. Then a red pony with the top of his head wrapped in a bandage walked it with a shotgun. As he entered the room, he shot Silver Shine, Flame Bash who stood above me, and Bear Hearts twice. I felt a burning pain in several spots on the side of my injured shoulder, over which Flame Bash sat just a second ago. All of that took around another two seconds. None of them had the time to react.

Then he pointed his shotgun at me but didn’t shoot.

“Hey Pensie, I’ve got myself a gun!” Scythe said with a smile.

That's what it's all about

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The dim evening light coming from the window together with the lamp on the ceiling lit the room well. Lying on my back on the floor with a light smile - my learned response to fear or anxiety, I looked up into Scythe's shotgun barrel enveloped in his red magic and pointed right at me. To assert my situation, I looked around the room, and saw small pools of blood spilling from my captors lying on the floor while they coughed or moaned in pain.

"Don't worry about them," he waved his hoof and said dismissively. I looked back at him, waiting for what he was going to do next. "I saw you got quite accustomed to your friends here, " he nodded towards Flame Bash and the tweezers that lay on the floor next to me. "But I hope it wasn't anything serious?" He asked, raising one of his brows.

He's asking me that? He's giving me a choice…

He's not going to like my answer…

Somehow it's still good to see him anyway.

"I was starting to wonder wether you were going to show up!" I said with a cheer, making my smile more relaxed, and started to get up while getting a closer look at him. He hid his ears by bandaging them, and dressed in some merchant armour to look like a normal pony. Smart. I expected him to do something more… raiderly, not something smart like that.

He didn't stop pointing the gun at me as I got up, and he just stared at me.

That was worrying.

"Did you… bring me anything?" I asked with a slight pretention, " and stop pointing that fucking thing at me!" With a smile that was getting a bit nervous I pushed the rifle away from me.

"Sure." He levitated a knife.

That length, the brown handle, the bevelled end, those familiar scratches!

I instantly recognised. My knife! He levitated it to my mouth. I bit the handle and smiled widely.

I noticed that he was pointing his shotgun at me again while watching me carefully. That was getting very worrying.

"Kill them, and we'll be on our way" He said while glancing at the lying and bleeding ponies on the floor next to the beds, not lowering the shotgun.

So it's a test.

I looked at them too. Silver Shine and Flame Bash? With pleasure. But Bear Hearts? He was the only one that treated me… Well better than them at least.

Silver Shine looked at me too. Carefully watching my next move.

"I kill them and everything goes back to as it was?" I asked Scythe

"I hope you don't have a problem with that?" He asked, and I felt the cold barrel touch the back of my head.

I do, and He knows that.

My heart started beating fast. I knew I was going to have to kill him. I can't fuck that up. I don't want to find out if he'll actually fulfull his threats from few days ago.

"No. Compared to this," i nodded towards my captors bleeding on the floor in the small room, "I Like being a–" I lowered my head to avoid the shot, turned around instantly, and jumped on Scythe as fast as I could. He shot, missing my head, The gunshot stunned me, and a high pitched buzz filled my ears. He used that moment to hit me over the head with a shotgun butt. I held my head close to the gun, and he held the gun with his magic, so the hit wasn't strong. I shrugged it off and rushed to plunge the knife in his chest. Discarding his shotgun, he lowered his head, pointed his horn at me.

Fucking unicorns and their horns

More precisely at my neck, and started running at me, hoping I'd do the same. But seeing that i stopped, and started backing up to not get impaled in that horn.

He was faster, but I managed to get out of his way to the right. Having his head down, he didn't see it until it was too late. When he was almost at the room's back wall where the window was, I took a swing with my head, and stabbed him in the left side of his chest. But I didn't end on one. I quickly took the knife out, and stabbed again, and again. He turned his head towards me and shot a burst of magic out of his horn, I ducked away under him, and with a great difficulty, lifted the rear half of his body. He was kicking and I heard him trying to use his magic on something, but I wasn't giving him time for that. I started pushing him towards the window. He clasped his front legs against it, I managed to reach his right font leg with my knife, after I stabbed it a few times, the leg let go of the window, his front fell on the floor, and with him shouting insults, I threw his rump out through the closed window. It dragged the front of his body, and while calling me a motherfucker, he fell out the window. A second after, I heard him hit the ground.

I leaned out of the window. One floor is not that high, and I couldn't go out there to finish him off. Somepony would stop me, maybe even kill me since I'm the one that looks like a raider.

Maybe I got lucky and he fell on his head.

I turned around towards the room and saw Flame Bash lying quietly and bleeding on the right hoof side of the room, close to Silver Shine who looked like he was in slightly better condition because he watched me carefully. Huh, they haven't bled out yet.

"Raider"-- Silver Shine started saying something.

I ignored that for now, and looked at Bear Hearts on the right, lying on the floor next to his bed and armour. His breathing was shallow, and his pool of blood was larger than the rest's.

Oh no. Not him.

Fueled by stress and adrenaline, I jumped at his bags as fast as I could. He's got to have some healing potions on him! I dug through the bag, looking for the purple liquid filled bottles while my hooves shook from the stress.

And found two!

I grabbed them in my mouth and rushed to Bear Hearts. I placed them on the floor, opened one quickly, almost spilling it on the floor, opened his mouth with my hoof, and poured half of the contents of the bottle in, and the other half onto his blood-red fur. The blood quickly washed away, leaving his dark brown coat clean and closing his wounds before my eyes.

His breathing quickly deepened and slowed.

I took a deep breath almost in sync with him.

Okay. That's good. That's good. Now for the rest of them. I relaxed.

Still panting, I grabbed the other healing potion, brought it to Silver Shine. His eyes were tired, but still open. He looked at me harshly as I opened the bottle slowly this time, and poured a drop into Flame Bash's mouth. To make sure he stays with us a bit longer.

"Raider," He said quietly, in a demanding tone.

That's as close to breaking free as I can get.

If there is some higher power. Please let this work, and I swear I won't hurt anypony ever again… Without a proper reason.

I brought my face close to Silver Shine's "Tell me how to take these things off me," I tapped the collars with my hoof, " "And I'll help you and your friend."

"No." He responded without thinking.

Fuck you! "Listen!" I bursted, but quickly calmed my tone, "Are you really going to let your friend die just to fuck me over?"

"Don't…" Flame Bash grunted

Shut the fuck up!

Silver shine glanced at the bleeding orange pony next to him, and then back at me.

"We won't let… A raider free to" he took coughed blood, " to kill again."

A wave of anger was building inside me. Why must they be so fucking stubborn!?

"I!... I had a chance for that just now! " i growled and brought my angry face closer, almost whispering in his ear, so that nopony would hear what I was going to say "Please. I promise I won't go back to raiding. Just… just let me go."

He looked at Flame Bash, and at me again. "Give us the potion, and you can be sure I won't forget that. But we're not letting you go."

Why! The fuck! Not!?

With an explosion of anger, I growled and hit him on the face with my hoof, and got back up with the potion.

"Then lay there and bleed out!" I erupted.

"You won't find the remotes! And nopony is going to help a raider get the collars off!" Silver Shine tried to reason with me in a weak and tired voice.

I don't fucking care.

I grabbed Scythe's shotgun that lay on the floor in my hoof, sat on the bed across the room with it, and the potion, and just stared at both of them.

They are willing to sacrifice themselves just to fuck me over! In-fucking-credible! And ponies call them heroes!

I wonder which one is going to bleed out first…

Then my ears twitched as I heard somepony moving on my right. I looked there, and saw Bear Hearts getting up.

Fuck.

He got up, his eyes screwed into his companions. Then he looked at me, and with a quick step approached me. I held the gun in both of my forehooves, and pointed it at him.

He slowed down. And with a careful pose and expression, he glanced at the potion lying on the bed next to me, and then at me again.

We stood like that for a moment. Bear Hearts probably wondering if he had to kill me in order to save his friends, and I, out of pure anger just not wanting him to help them.

He was getting awfully close. I noticed him teansing up his muscles, preparing to strike me.

Ah fuck! Whatever. They die, I'm probably just as dead too.

I pointed the gun away from Bear Hearts, letting him know he can take the potion.

He exhaled, and slowly grabbed the potion in his hoof, still watching me carefully.

I looked away from him. That made him relax, he took the potion, and quickly brought it to his friends. As he did, i heard hoofsteps rushing up the floor.

Scythe's coming again.

I took cover behind the bed i was sitting on, and pointed the gun at the entrance.

After few seeconds, i saw a group of ponies with guns, the gate guards and the mayor climb to the top of the stairs. When they saw me, tbey shouted to take cover, and instantly fell back down the wooden stairs, only their guns sticking out.

"Don't shoot!" I shouted at them, "I didn't do it!"

They whispered something to each other. "Put your gun away and let us see for ourselves raider!" The mayor replied after a moment.

"So you can shoot me without a problem? Sure, right fucking on it!" I replied.

Then I heard quick hoofsteps behind me. There was an orange flash, something hit me in tbe face. Ilost focus on anything, and fell on my side on the floor, then I felt something heavy press onto me, and before the shock could pass, i felt a barrage of hoof punches on my face.

***

Fucking ow.

My face hurt all over. My cheeks and brows were swollen, the chain got back on, and we were on our way again. Going to some other city.

That was after Flame Bash beat the shit out of me, and then finished my little 'surgery' by mercilessly ripping the bullet out of my shoulder and the birdshot pellets from Scythes shotgun from my side with his horn magic, which opened all the wounds even more.

Turns out he using the tweezers before was him at least trying to be gentle.

And I was sure they chained me again just as some form of punishment.

I limped quickly, saving my bandaged leg, but trying to stay in pace with them all so the collar wouldn't pull on my burned neck. They all walked just fine after drinking a healing potion each.

We walked next to rusted train tracks. The tracks themselves were completely red and brown from rust. The concrete blocks connecting the rails that emerged from the stones with which the tracks were gave a stable foothold, but imposed annoyingly short steps, so we all walked next to the tracks, on the yellowish grass.

Eventually everything got dark. With the sun gone, it was starting to get chilly, so they decided to start looking for a place to spend the night in.

They found a small railway station, a small red brick building with just a ticket booth, and eight three pony benches bolted to a concrete floor, four against every wall on the two sides of the ticket booth that stood in the centre of the station. Without a word, Bear Hearts chained to one of the benches in the corner on one side of the station, while Silver Shine barricaded every window and door of the station, and the rest of my captors tried to work out a fire on the other side.

Great. I was so hungry I thought I could pass out any moment, thirsty, and now they are gonna make me sleep on a cold concrete.

I'm not going to just quietly sit here like this. I've got to somehow get myself some food.

"I'm fucking hungry!" I shouted at them across the station.

"Good! I hope you die of hunger!" Flame Bash replied quickly, and went back to starting the fire with Bear Hearts.

"I should have gutted you and then killed Scythe!" I shouted back as I stood up

"You should have! Then they would have killed you and the Wasteland would be a better place!"

"Don't fucking act as if–"

"Shut the fuck u–" he interrupted me, but I didn't stop

"--You wouldn't happily finish me off if I was the one bleeding out on the floor!" We shouted at each other at the same time.

We both finished. I wasn't sure if he understood what I shouted to him

"Shut up both of you!" Silver shine shouted to us. " Or you will still bring something to us with that noise! Shout at each other during the day!"

"Good! I hope whatever I bring will tear you all to shreds!" I paused for a moment, "Give me something to eat!"

Silver shine stopped pushing a wardrobe to a window, and with a fast step approached me. I raised my head and took a firm pose to show I wasn't afraid. "Shut your mouth or I will bake your neck until it's black." He croaked through his teeth.

It was the first time I saw him actually angry.

"If you'd just let me go then, you wouldn't have me as your problem!" I shouted again

He levitated a pistol out lf a holster he had around his chest, raised it, and put it to the top of my head. "Shut. Up. Last warning."

I just looked angrily in his equally infuriated eyes for a long moment. "Why didn't you just let me go?" I growled

"I am not going to just let a raider roam free, because he had a change of heart." He growled back.

"Why not!" I shouted because of frustration that built inside me.

I felt something hit me on the top of my head so hard that my forelegs collapsed. I fell to the floor, hitting it first with my jaw and then with my stomach, biting my tongue very painfully in the process.

"You don't murder and rape one day, and then the next just say you won't do it anymore. You must pay for what you did."

So that's what it's all about

I do not!

I didn't respond, my head, tongue and jaw hurt too much from the fall, so Silver Shine walked away, and git back to barricading the station.

After the pain dimmed out a bit, I raised my head from the floor, "So you and your asshole friends will keep me as your punching bag until you deem it's enough?!" I shouted at him. He didn't respond. "You motherfucker! I'm not going to be your dog!" I suddenly felt a searing pain explode in my neck, which made me start thrashing and screaming on the floor.

Almost instantly Bear hearts stood from where the fire slowly started lighting the station "Stop it Silver!" He shouted, and the shock collar stopped.

Motherfuckers! Fucking cock sucking sons of whores!

I thought as I lied on the cold floor. I hate them. I hate them so much. If there is a higher power in the wasteland. Fuck you! I will kill them the second I have the chance!

***

After an hour or so, the fire they made was decent sized. Silver Shine barricaded all entrances and holes in the walls, and now all of them were sitting near the fire together. a strong smell of something delicious hit my nose. That alone made me start drooling without even knowing what they were cooking there. I got so hungry, I thought I was going to lass out any moment. My stomach was starting to hurt, spreading an annoying emptiness across my body.

Then I saw Bear Hearts get up, and start going in my direction with two bowls of something hot and steamy on his hoof. I could already imagine it was going to be good. I licked my face and locked my unconsciously wide open eyes on the bowls.

He saw my i could eat whatever was inside together with the bowl' gaze, and to my suprise, the big brown pony sat on the floor next to me and slid one of the bowls in front of my hooves.

I instantly got to eating whatever was inside. Some kind of colourful vegetable mix, salty and delicious. Exackly what I needed right now. I emptied the bowl in a flash, and knew I could fit one or two more. I saw him holding the second bowl near to him.

I straightened up and looked up at bear hea–

At his neck, he was just that tall when sitting next to me. I looked further up at his face.

"Give me that."

He pushed the second bowl to me, I took the bowl in my forehooves, and brought it to my mouth. It was the same thing that was in the first bowl, but worse. Or I just wasn't that hungry anymore.

"Who was the pony at the hotel?" He asked while I was finishing.

"Scythe, he was our unofficial leader. Until you fucked up the clan." I explained while licking the bowl clean.

"Do you have any idea what he's going to do now?"

That made me freeze with my tounge out in the bowl" Hhat? He fucking survived?"

Bear Hearts nodded positively with an understanding look.

Fuck

"No. He'll want to kill me, and you all probably too. That's all." I got back to licking the bowl.

He muttered in response.

Then to my shock, he put his heavy hoof on my shoulder. I froze with my nose in the bowl again, not knowing how I was supposed to react. I just looked at him out of the corner of my eye to see what the fuck was he trying to do.

He noticed how I stiffened "Calm down," he patted my shoulder, "Thanks… For what you did for me. You really surprised me." He said sincerely, and… proudly?

"... Cool" I said shortly. I felt awkward and didn't know what to do, but…

This feels pleasant. I like it. I like the hoof on my back, and him being nice.

I relaxed, and even smiled lightly.

"Silver and Flame… they are not like what you think. They…"--

"Do you agree with them?" I asked him suspiciously

His soft face took a troubled look.

"The- no. You all think they're some kind of fucking Wasteland heroes that deliver justice."

"Raider. I don't agree with them completely, but"--

"I just had the chance to run away and go back to raiding! How is that not enough!?"

"Raider."--

"Fuck you! You know nothing about me! Who do you think you all are?!"

He took his hoof off me, which I felt was a loss for some reason. "Be nice, that's the only thing that can help you. Please." He said sincerely. "I'll get you a blanket or something," he finished, matter of factly.

"I never chose this life!" I shouted at him as he got up.

"It… It doesn't change what you did." He said with doubt, as if half believing what he said himself, turned around, and went off towards the fire.

I should have left fucking them all to bleed out!

***

I hate autumn. I opened my eyes and felt the cold. I threw the blanket off me and rolled of the bench that i slept through the night on,

I hate autumn. As soon as I opened my eyes, and the sweet Insensitivity of sleep left my body, I felt the cold. It penetrated the blanket I was tightly wrapped into and my skin effortlessly. A mild inconvenience, but annoying enough that I couldn't fall back into the comfort of numbness that sleep would bring. No matter how much I tried to ignore it and force my eyes shut, my body began to involuntarily shake, trying to combat the coolness while shaking the last bits of tiredness off me.

With an annoyed growl, I unwound the blanket and with my chain clanking loudly, I rolled off the bench that the other end of my chain was attached to. While the chain and the collars cooperated together to restrict my head movements as much as possible, making most of my sleeping positions uncomfortable as fuck the bench proved itself as an alright place to sleep. Definitely better than the concrete floor it was bolted to.

I stretched like dogs do, raising my rear up and leaning backwards until I touched the ground with my belly. I savored the pleasant feeling of muscles stretching after the nighttime stagnation, until it was interrupted by all my wounds reminding me of themselves all at once. My neck burned under one of the collars, my left shoulder and side emanated a sharp pain in various places, and my swollen face and tongue hurt if I moved them too much.

All in all, not much has changed since the clan

Silver cunt and friends probably drank themselves a potion or two to help their wounds. I looked towards them, lying wrapped in blankets similar to mine on the far end of the station around the bonfire. The fire was dying down, they must have it not much warmer than I do. Do they plan to go through winter like this? You can't do that with just fire and blankets. We all need proper winter clothes to not freeze.

Eh, Nevermind that. They can freeze for as long as I care.

With the clanking of my chain I sat on the bench, pulled the blanket over me and looked at them again.

They plan to drag me with themselves until they decide I served my punishment. What can I do about that? They'll rather die than let me go.

Try to escape again? How? With the collars and shit no ideas came to mind. Killing them wasn't an option either. They must take the collars if me themselves, otherwise I'll never take that shit off.

No matter how much I didn't want to, every way I thought of led me to one inevitable conclusion.

I'll have to… be their good dog.

Fuck.

Well, I can be good, but i don’t have to be pleasant.

I took a deep breath, and…” I’m hungry assholes!”

A moment worth appricieating

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why won't they just let me go?

answer: They don't trust me, that's pretty obvious.

answer number two: they think it would be too good for me.

Why that is what I don't understand.

you mean what, i'm supposed to suffer a little before they let me go to satisfy Flame Bash’s and Silver Shine’s sick sense of justice? I'm supposed to fucking throw myself on a sentry cannon and let it tear me to fucking shreds to please them? Should I fucking walk around like a hermit, in frayed clothes, humbling myself and moaning about how 'I don't deserve to live because I've done so much wrong' for them to give me a break? And even if! What if the other ponies I meet want the same thing? Am I supposed to do this over and over with everypony I meet?

No! I will fucking not!

***

The swamp spread out before me, the waterlogged ground, the consistency of which resembled pudding, threatened to bog us down. The only thing that protected us from getting stuck, and since it was getting pretty cold, freezing in the slush, was a wooden footbridge that crossed the swamp in a straight line.

“Hurry raider! Maybe someone is still alive!” Bear Hearts shouted to me seeing that I was Barely trotting.

Well, too bad, because somehow I don't feel like running today! My legs are sore!

I had to run away from Radwolves because Silver Shine convinced Bear Hearts to use me as a bait.

"You guys might get more caps for somepony alive, but me? I won’t get shit. ”

Unlike Flame Bash who was rather good looking, regardless of facial expression, Bear Hearts had a face that was not pleasant. And with the slight profession that had set in on her at this point, one could say bluntly that he looked nasty.

Appearances are deceiving. In this case very much so.

"I don't do it just for the money, and you shouldn't either."

I laughed, "Sure, because anyypony would do that for me."

"If you don't ever try, it's gonna be like that for sure."

Yeah, fucking sure. Eh.

I nodded my head sideways and sighed, but quickened my step

Bear Hearts beamed slightly, and turned his head to look in the direction he was running in.

The walkway was wide, a pony could pull a cart over it without too much trouble. That much space allowed me to walk fairly freely, so I could look around and observe my surroundings without worrying about losing my balance or falling off into the mud. I stared at the weird trees we passed from time to time sticking out of the sludge. Almost completely leafless, and surrounded by crowns of roots sticking out of the mud around it, each a few tens of centimetres long.

"Do you see anything?" Bear Hearts asked me, seeing that I was looking at one point for a long time.

"No... well, actually yes, a swamp all around, and some three cocksuckers on the footbridge in front of me." I told him, making breaks for catching my breath between every other word.

Bear Hearts turned around muttering something to himself, and correcting the big rifle he carried on his

No offense, I think you’re cool Bears, I just don’t want it to be obvious.

"Well, we're here!" Flame Bash shouted, pointing forward.

Curious to see what the asshole had found, I ran up together with Bear Hearts, and we saw a dilapidated cart made of wood. Dragged out from the pathway, partially submerged in mud, and torn into pieces with a great force.

There were three bodies lying by the cart, at least that's what I saw. The bodies of ponies, a normal sight, but what caught my attention was that two of them were huddled together. The two ponies, afraid to move lest Aliflats sense them, were frozen in the mud.

Looking at this, I felt something like a .... emptiness. I stared at them for a long time.

…

"Aliflat work." Silver Shine stated, “ they're probably here somewhere submerged in this mud," he nodded toward the cart.

Flame Bash lifted his head up and groaned in exasperation, "Winter’s around the corner and we get a job like this? We were supposed to take only the easy ones at the end, Silver!”

Aliflats. They jump out of the mud on you and drown you under their weight. Not the worst way to die.-

“--ot of money.” Silver Shine finished, snapping me back to here and now again.

Flame Bash sighed, "Damn it. Well, looks like nopony’s there, we should check that wagon then, -find out who they ate."

"Or if somepony survived." Bear Hearts added

"How?” Flame Bash turned to bear hearts while making sweeping movements with the front legs, “look how they tore it apart! There must have been at least several of them, and you know what they are like before winter sleep!"

“I’m just saying we shouldn't assume the worst-case scenario right away.”

Flame Bash calmed his tone, “You and your optimism are gonna get us killed someday.” He shook his head. “And that there, is the perfect example,” he added while pointing at me with his leg after a moment. In response, I reared and crossed my front legs, one vertically and the other horizontally in a vulgar gesture.

"Well then, who goes?" Silver Shine asked after silence fell

They both turned and looked at me

"The lightest one." Flame Bash replied with a grin, “Maybe he’ll be useful for something again.”

“Fuck off both of you!” I bursted at Flame Bash, and at Silver Shine who I noticed was looking at Bear Hearts in an asking manner.

“Alright.” he said blankly, to which Silver Shine smiled slightly, and Flame Bash very widely.

Wha–

“Prepare to fly, raider!” Flame Bash shouted happily.

Their horns started glowing, I felt their combined magic envelop me, and start slowly lifting me from the ground while I trashed my legs in the air and shouted insults at them.

“In life, you have to appreciate moments like this,” Flame Bash said to Silver Shine, and they both chuckled as they levitated me over the mud.

between the heads of these two cocksuckers I saw a brief flash in the distance. somewhere maybe a hundred metres from here, Where the road was turning and passing one of these strange trees.

Then I heard a bang, they all turned around, and at that exact moment Flame Bash bursted with a wail of pain, and collapsed on the wooden walkway. Suddenly the whole magic that enveloped me disappeared, and I fell into the cold mush close to the walkway.

With a loud, worried… no, a scared shout, Bear Hearts jumped over Flame Bash, shielding the lying orange pony with his own body. Meanwhile, Silver Shine jumped to the side, hoping that burrowing himself into the mud, and a wooden footbridge protruding hoof-high from the mud would shield us from the fire.

I lay still in the brown sludge. No alifat hadn’t jumped on me yet, that’s a good sign.

I carefully crawled towards the walkway, watching the surface of the mush all around me for any movement.

If any Aliflat was to jump on me, at least I’ll know when to hold my breath…

Silver Shine tried to simultaneously retrieve the weapon slung across his back, and pull health potions from his pockets while I dug into the mud as deep as I could cursing repeatedly. He concentrated on the potions. gave me one and levitated it to my muzzle as I got close to him..

"Give it to Flame Bash! Quick!" I grabbed it but didn't flinch. He’s gonna fucking shoot me! And I'm supposed to save that asshole ?

"Do it!" Silver Shine shouted at me

“Fuck off!”

“Do that or I’ll crush your larynx right… now…” He started shouting, but downed his voice to a low growl.

“I hope that some bullet will snap off that fucking horn of yours.” I muttered to myself

Reluctantly, I looked at Bear Hearts standing over Flame Bash, firing in the direction of the attacker who was barely visible in the distance

If I don’t get fucking shot in the process!

A bullet hit Bear Hearts right front right knee. it bent under him and he fell down on his front cursing loudly.

Just like that!

I don't think that's anything serious. Or nothing that couldn't be fixed with a potion. And now that he lay on the ground, I could hide behind him to give Flame Bash the potion!

I took a breath, and prepared to jump onto the footbridge, but then, another shot tore through bear Heart’s armour. That’s what I assumed by the short wail of pain that followed. I couldn't see where it hit him, but the effect of it I saw was just fine. He fell completely limp on the footbridge in front of Flame Bash. I froze in place and watched him fall.

Seeing another one of his friends go down, silver shine shouted a curse, and fired away from that same rifle he shot me with when we first met. I was glad to stand on the other side of that barrel.

Then I snapped to reality.

Oh shit They're both hit! Fuck! Shit! Were fucked!

"Give them the potion you useless bastard!"

Alright! Alr…

I stopped myself from preparing for a bold sprint.

We aren't fucked. They are fucked.

and that leaves, just you. I thought turning my head to Silver Shine

"If we survive this, you're gonna have to let me out!" I shouted to him, half joking and probing him over the sound of gunfire.

"Not now! Give them the potion!"

"Now, you asshole! Answer!"

"I... I'll think about it!" he said without leaning out from behind the scope as bullets whizzed past us

"Silver Shine! Ple–" I stifled what I just wanted to say

The same situation again.– I thought as I felt anger rise in me. Was I seriously going to beg him already? Fuck no!

Enough asking. You're not gonna let me go you motherfucker. Isn't that right?!

As I felt my frustration dissolve, I felt a smile make its way on my face. I took a step towards Silver Shine. To be right behind him.

Then I swung

I think I'm going to enjoy this.

And hit him with the lower side of my hoof in the ear as hard as I could.

He screamed, covered that ear with a hoof, and flopped onto his back.

I climbed on top of him and started beating him across the face with my muddy hooves.

Making me do all the most dangerous jobs!? Using me as a bait for radwolves!? Forcing me to give a healing potion to Flame Bash?!

Every hit on his face felt like such a treat. Finally, I waited for this for too long!

He pulled himself together, shielded his face, and focused magic on his horn. I saw a white bright streak rise around it. He shot a bust of bright frizzling bust of magic at me, and made me jump off him to avoid the magical bullet. This gave him time to get up. all muddy, just like me, he stood up on all fours, and with his eyes wide open, aiming his horn at me. Rushing before he could collect enough strength for a next bullet, I grabbed a full hoofful of mud and threw it straight into his eyes. He managed to shield his face, The horn was glowing stronger and stronger, Fuck!

Then, I heard another bang, and a shot hit Silver SHine from behind.

His focus shattered, horn stopped glowing, and he started staggering. I used the moment, and pounced on him.

We both fell, our heads hitting the footbridge and the rest of our bodies falling into the mud again. I picked myself up faster, and before Silver Shine could get up, I hit him in the head with my hoof as hard as I could. It disoriented him.

I've had enough of that fucking horn of yours!

I hit his head again, hard enough that it hit the footbridge below. Then I grabbed it in my hooves, put it against the wooden walkway so that the edge touched the Base of his horn, held him tight, and while he shouted for me to stop, while desperation tok over his eyes, and his horn was starting to glow in his last desperate attempt to protect every unicorn’s greatest treasure, with a wide smile, I hit the top of his horn with my right hoof.

To see him scared. The ever stoic asshole begging me to stop! Now that’s something you don’t see everyday!

Apart from a cry of pain, I saw no effect, so I took a swing, and struck again, with all my strength. A nasty crack of broken bone and a scream of unprecedented agony declared my success. Panting, I moved away from Silver Shine, looking at my work with satisfaction.

You can't choke me with that magic of yours anymore.

He lay there, breathing shallowly and unevenly with his eyes wide open, staring at me in horror.

It was the first time I had seen emotion in his eyes. He was always so calm.

I should have just let myself go, but oh well, I like it that way too!

And now let's finish this.

I grabbed him with my foot by his mane, he tried to defend himself, so I hit him in the middle of his nose. this always ends in tears, no matter how tough you are. Now with eyes full of tears he couldn't see anything, and he couldn't defend himself. I pushed his face into the mud, and held it.

Two Second

Ten seconds

Haha! Look how keeping me turned out for ya-aaaa…

Suddenly, like a wave of shock, like i was bucked with two hooves at the stomach. A realisation hit me.

I pulled his face out of the brown cold mush. And as he took a breath, The last thing I expected was to feel relieved. Yet I felt exactly that.

Ifell on my rump into the freezig mud right where I stood and started beating myself at the head.

no no no NO!

My breathing got shallow and quick. My stomach started turning and i feld sick like i have never before. The freezing mud below me didnt matter anymore. I…

I am not like that anymore!

I didn't–

I'm not!--

I had no choice! Yes! I had no choice!

Suddenly, shots from a distance began to fly again around me.

Don’t think about it now!

I quickly pulled him out and started searching through his muddy clothes. And just as I expected, he had both remotes. The one from the electric collar I just threw in the mud, the other from the bomb collar had a key. I lay down fairly flat, and in the dark tried to hit the hole on the bomb collar with the key.

As I drove the spanner like this over the surface of the collar trying to feel for a hole, I heard a tired groan from the left.

Bear Hearts, was lying down and breathing rapidly looking at me with a furious expression.

He had seen everything.

"You..."

"Shut up!"

"I should have-"

"You should have let me go! I roared furious. “I wouldn’t have done this!” I shouted, my voice cracking from sheer frustration and fury, “It’s your fault!"

I found the keyhole. Stuck the key in it, and with the click that I waited for for so long, yet now it gave me no satisfaction, the Collar fell into the mud below me.

and without waiting for a reply, I took off, and started sprinting down the log in the direction we had come from. And so running, as gunshots wheezed past my sides, I ran, and ran, and ran.

It wasn’t my fault. I had no choice! They made me do that by refusing to let me go! Yeah!

But I kept running. Away from my captors, and away from my own actions. Again.

Then I stopped, closed my eyes and screwed up my face.

An inevitable thought appeared in my head. One I would very much like to ignore, but couldn’t.

I looked up and groaned reluctantly, like when you have a chore that you need to do, but you don't want to because you know how much additional work it is.

“Fuck!”

I can’t fucking keep breaking shit and then running awayyy! What am I going to fucking do now? Fucking go to another village just to be kicked out ot killed?

“Ughhhh, Fuck!” I shouted angrily, and turned around.

Luna you bitch!

View Online

I'll quickly run up, give a healing potion to these fuckers, pull them off the footbridge, and fuck off so they don't get a chance to kill me.

Simple plan.

Just don't get shot in the process and it'll be perfect.

***

When I was still several dozen metres from the place where everyone was lying, bullets were already whizzing past me. I was slaloming, randomly slowing down, changing direction and dodging sideways like a drunkard, but in spite of this, the dickhead who was shooting at me managed to hit me three times. Shallow wounds on the shoulder and buttocks, nothing more than a slightly painful reminder to keep moving, but monstrously annoying. So much so that each time I felt pain in a new spot on my body,, I shouted insults at full volume while speeding up even more. If anyone was standing by, they would probably find it a comical sight.

I managed to run to where they were lying, just as I had left them a moment ago. Except Bear Hearts had thrown unconscious Flame Bash off the footbridge to provide him with at least some cover and was in the process of crawling to Silver Shine himself.

Then our eyes met, he gave me a look so sharp, and full of hate that I think could have killed me with his eyes if I got too close, and watched me carefully without a word. I jumped into the ditch behind Silver Shine, who laid on his back with a badly bruised face and was looking at me with a blank stare.

All right, then, it looks like I'm on my own.

Silver Shine had some kind of bag next to him, it was lying in the mud next to him, I grabbed the zipper with my mouth and started pulling quickly and chaotically.

Grenades.

"Where are the healing potions!" I shouted to Bear Hearts

He only looked at me for a second. But that hateful look I knew exactly. It promised revenge, I could already imagine what would happen the second I turned my guard down around him.

“I want to fucking help you!” I shouted, but i saw no reaction. "I'm So–... It was a mistake!" I corrected.

"In my saddlebags." Bear Hearts replied with a full of unmasked hatred growl.

Good, I thought he lost his mind or something. Their chaces of survival would be slim without me.

Actually, maybe they’d manage without me…

Eh, whatever.

I looked at them, strapped to the rear of the brown pony twice my size that definitely wanted to kill me, who at the same time was lying on the footbridge in the open with a sniper just waiting for me to poke my head out.

Yeah. Fucking easy-peasy.

Lying on my stomach in the mud, I opened Silver Shine’s bag with my hooves and started to search it thoroughly.

Grenades round grenades, cylindrical grenades, orange grenades, grey grenades, you name it, but no fucking potions!

Suddenly an idea popped into my head.

Since he has so many of these grenades here, maybe he has some smoke ones?

I need to check on the wind first.

I leaned out from behind the walkway to check if there's a wind in any direction, Then I heard a swish, and felt a searing pain, like a hammer hit me a hundred times, it spread all over on the inside of my front leg paralysing me in agony. I dropped to the ground and started screaming for a while, and after the pain eased a bit, while still lying on my back in the mud, I kept cursing that motherfucker that shot me.

Fuck, fuck fuuuck! I am not dong that again!

Once I came to myself again after a while, and masked my screams as short bursts of a sour laughter, I started pulling out grenades randomly with my mouth, snatching the pin to throw, repeatedly until I got a smoke one. Surely, one of these would be smoke!

Explosion after explosion left me nearly deaf, but it had also torn the footbridge ahead of us into a fiery mess of splinters and broken wooden beams. Luckily a few of the grenades happened to be the right ones, and after a moment later, smoke kicked up into the air concealing us.

I just hoped Bear Hearts wasn't dead by now.

Holding my front right leg close to my chest to spare it, I hobbled over to Bear Hearts' pouches, and pulled out three healing potions.

Well fuck it would be too easy for me if there were four wouldn’t it?

I gave one to Bear Hearts, with a sigh I put the second one into the mouth of a barely panting Flame Bash, and spilled the third one on the corner of Silver Shine and put the rest in my mouth just like Flame Bash.

Now quickly fuck off before they recover.

I stepped onto the footbridge, and, fighting the pain that was pounding all over my forearm as if somepony was constantly hitting me there with a hammer, I began to swing with one hoof raised, leaving a trail of blood droplets that trickled down my completely caked in mud fur.

"You think you're just going to walk away like that raider!" I heard a shout behind me

I stopped clumsily, and looked behind me. Bear Hearts stood up, and slowly started limping towards me.

Fucking hell!

A shudder ran through me, and I found a new source of strength within me that helped me push past the pain in both my front legs and rump. This new strength was called: If he gets me he'll fucking tear me to pieces!

"Leave me and go help your friends, you idiot!" I shouted as I felt a surge of pain from the wound in my ‘healthier’ leg almost lost balance.

But he didn't stop, just slowly caught up with me metre by metre, in what could be compared to a race between two snails.

"You think some potion is going to fix what you did Silver Shine! Do you know what it's like for a unicorn to lose a horn! It will kill you, you understand!"

"It's your fault! Not mine! You gave me no choice!" I shouted behind me accusingly.

"You justify everything to yourself like that? Even how you gutted that mare when we first met! You are an animal! And you should be slaughtered like a rabid dog!"

And slowly, step by step, Bear Hearts was coming towards me, and towards the fulfilment of his threat.When he was a pony's distance from me, he darted in, and grabbed me by the hind leg.

"Get off me!" I shouted, and kicked him with my other hind leg in the muzzle, and fell on the hard boards myself. He held onto my rear hoof and began dragging me towards him. Lying on my stomach I looked back and began frantically kicking him in the muzzle again. After a couple kicks, I heard a crack, and with a loud groan, he finally let go. I lifted myself up as fast as I could, which with only three available hooves proved to be quite a challenge, and started limping further down the footbridge as fast as I could.

"When you kill another pony, or break a unicorn's horn, will you also say you had no choice ?!" he shouted from behind, holding himself by his bleeding nose.

"Fuck off!" I shouted, and sped up, hoping Bear Hearts would come to his fucking senses, and focus on helping his friends.

***
And I walked like that for a while, along the footbridge until the swamp was over. When I felt solid ground under my feet, I chose a random direction, and went there without thinking much in case they wanted to chase me.

And so I walked. And walked, and walked, my coat caked in dried mud and blood which dripped on the ground constantly. The forest was becoming more and more lively, I felt the pleasant smell of the decomposing orange and yellow leaves under my hooves that crunched with my every wobbly step.

I continued to limp on three legs until it got dark. It seemd that on this night the pegasi could not keep the cloud curtain tight, because every now and then the moon would emerge, illuminating the surroundings with relatively bright bluish rays.

Then, I heard the sound of water.

A stream? A river?.

It was only now that I felt how thirsty I had begun to feel, the stinging in my dry throat had become pronounced, the burning under the last collar left on my neck, the one to which the chain could be attached was making itself known, and the mud with which I was covered was scratching and irritating me almost all over my body.

I quickened my pace, passing the trees and found the stream. It flowed in a naturally carved canal. Too steep to go down without falling into the water painfully, and to back up without problem. So I walked along it, hoping to find a place with a gentler descent.

Eventually I found one, and while I was limping along on three legs with a quick and clumsy step, I suddenly heard a snap by my side.

"Stop" A rough voice demanded from the darkness.

Instinctively I stopped, searching with my eyes for whoever had said it, and saw the black outline of a pony wearing a large hat between the trees to my right. It was so dark I could barely see him.

Don’t notice my ears, don't notice my ears! – I thought while my heart raced.

I stood frozen with my eyes closed for a short moment.

He didn’t shoot me right away!

So he can’t see them.

Oh please Luna if you hear me, keep the moon behind the fucking clouds.

"Fuck off" I said in a tired and exasperated voice, and continued limping with my right front leg dangling, descending into the stream.

Suddenly there was a flash.

A deafening bang followed. the ground in front of me trembled, and in an instinctive attempt to avoid being shot I jumped back, slipped on a stone at the edge of the ditch and fell on my side.

"Don't move me or the next shot will turn your head into cheese."

"Ow you selfish fucking motherfucker!" I shouted slowly picking myself up. He didn't react to that, he must have seen I was hurt.

"Shut up! What are you looking for here?"

"None of your fucking business."

"I think it is my business."

Fucking kill him. I'm going to kill him and he won't be so brash.

Of course, I won't, but the urge is still there.

"I fucking want water, what, are you fucking blind!?"

"You're running away from someone" He stated firmly, "What have you done…?" He added with suspicio.

Oh you just have to fucking know everything don’t you? Stick your nose somewhere else!

"I fucked your mother!” I snarled, “ I want a drink of water, wash up and fuck off!"

He stood still for a moment, but after a moment he sighed, "Alright. Go. Wash up, and fuck off."

I snarled again, nodded my head in anger, and started to slowly hobble up towards the stream. Only now did I notice that the pony that was aiming at me, had a cart parked in between trees around the gentle descent towards the stream. I passed a quickly extinguished campfire standing by the stream.

"You’re badly injured," he said standing on the edge of the ditch.

I turned my head to him, "Oh, thank you Mr Perceptive." I said with a strong note of mockery, and bent down to take a drink.

He watched me carefully the whole time.

"Now wash and fuck off." he ordered.

His bossy tone irritated me terribly. Fuck how I'd like to hit him over the head with some kind of stone.

But Yeah, I'll do just that. I need to wash quickly and fuck off before another crack in the clouds opens and he sees my ears!

I washed myself, and watched the mud and blood slowly dissolve in water, allowing my green-yellow fur to finally regain its colour as I breathed a sigh of relief. Feeling the sensation of the cold water collide with the pain and the feeling of the heat of my wounds on my leg, shoulders and rump brought a blissful moment of something that you could say resembled pleasure.

Despite this hopeless situation, I didn’t want to get out that quickly. This was my first true relief in a long time! I looked down at my water-soaked hooves with a slight smile, and breathed in deeply. Moments later, I lay down in the stream, leaving only my head above the surface. The icy water, although not pleasant, eased the pain, and I could finally feel the tension coming off me.

"Okay, get out." I heard the hat pony’s raspy voice ruin my one moment of rest.

"Fuck off." I said flatly, I don’t like when somepony gives me orders.

"Get out!" he growled.

I’ll teach you a fucking lesson you cocksucker.

Hearing that he was losing patience, which I assumed I had stretched long enough, I slowly started to rise, but while coming out of the water, I dug through the bottom of the stream, and grabbed a rock in my badly wounded leg. I’m gonna beat the shit out of him, and then I’ll fuck off because I decided to, not because some mother fucker tells me to.

It would be painful to hold it, but I could hold it near my chest while making it look like I'm just saving my wounded leg.

On three legs, with a groan caused by the pain holding the rock in a wounded leg caused, I stepped out of the stream, and stood on the bank.

At that moment the moon emerged from a window of clouds, and lit up the spot where we stood. I looked at my injured leg, and cursed to myself.

Luna you bi-- Oh, so that’s why it hurt so much.

I saw my bone. Very clearly. The bullet must have hit it and torn off a piece of flesh.

"Raider." Said the pony in the hat with shock.

I involuntarily smiled. Arousing horror was always nice, regardless of the shityness of the situation.

"Shit." I mumbled to myself.

"There's no such thing as an ex-raider! Where are your mates!" He shouted at me in something that I assumed was a momentary panic.

I couldn’t let him shoot me because of that!

"Fuck knows! I left them!" I shouted accusingly.

The pony in the hat came close enough to me that his shotgun, which I could now see was perched on a combat saddle, was a hoof's distance from my face. "Tell the truth or I'll blow your psychotic head off!" He said while leaning forward, as if preparing to take a shot at any moment.

I clenched my sharp teeth, and felt pain surge in my hurt leg from squeezing the stone in it.

The easiest thing to do now would be to throw myself at his neck! Somehow… At least that’s the only thing he doesn’t expect. I think…

"Listen you fuck!" said I angrily, but mastered my tone, "Calm down or this will end badly for y-- both of us!" I finished calmly, with a hint of request.

The pony hat took two steps away from me.

"Prove it." he growled

In response, shaking from the adrenaline, and from the cold of the stream, I released the stone from my injured leg. "All I can do."

He looked at me for a moment, and finally raised the shotgun to the air. "Boy, you have a lot of explaining to do.

***
"A new life with a clean slate?" he looked at me in disbelief

"Do you have a problem with that?" I asked while pushing a cloth hoof carrier he made for me under the last collar so the coarse metal wouldn’t rub me on the neck that much.

"Boy, I don't care in the slightest," he said waving his hoof, then he bent down to the kettle over the fire and pulled a wet piece of cloth from the boiling water. "You won't make it."

I snarled, "Because what, you think I can't control myself?"

"I fucking met you half an hour ago, I have no fucking idea if you have self-control issues! But I can see you don't feel any remorse, or even pretend to."

"Give me that band-aid and shut the fuck up okay?"

He smirked, "fuck you".

"Hey! What am I supposed to feel remorse for? I have nothing to feel guilty about."

"That's exactly why you won't make it. Shit, just listening to this makes me feel like shooting you in the face, and I don't fucking care one bit! So if you want to live even a little among the regular ponies, keep your mouth shut."

"Are you going to give me the bandwagon or not?"

"Ask. Politely."

"I'm not going to fucking ask you, give me the cloth! You said you would!"

He smirked again, and handed me a wet piece of cloth with his hoof. i grabbed it in my teeth, and holding the end of it with my healthy leg, slowly wrapped it around my injured right leg.

"What are you smiling about?" said I, holding the bandage with my teeth

"Of you." Before I had time to reply anything, he stood up and showed some direction with his hoof, "There is the nearest village there, if you learn manners, someone there will probably help you. Go."

I looked at him puzzled

“i'm not driving into the fucking city with a raider, what do you think? I sell shit for a living, and you'll scare off my customers! Go there, now or tomorrow, or don’t, I don't give a shit, but definitely not with me."

I slowly rose up on my three hooves, “Cocksucker,”

“Well fuck you too,” he replied flatly, to which i turned tu the direction he pointed at, and slowly limped in that direction

“Put the fucking hoof in the– Wait! Wait!” He got up quickly, ran up to me, “Too fucking proud to ask for help,” he said as he put my hurt hoof into a carrier he mdae earlier out of cloth, “Now fuck off.”

***
I was walking through the woods in the direction indicated by the asshole in the hat, you know I'm not going to ask! Asking is pathetic! If it's been a long time since you've had your face bashed in, all you had to do in the clan was ask for something and you were guaranteed to be persecuted! Even your mother sometimes joined in,

I smiled slightly

that bitch, heh

The wounded leg, the scrapes on the shoulders and the buttocks hurt, more and more. Something must have been wrong with that water. Fuck I'm so lucky. But I didn't stop, I suspected if I did it would only get worse with time. I neede a place to rest. Somewhere where I wouldn’t freeze, or get eaten by radwolves.

The pain is only in your head. It doesn't really hurt that much. Cut it off.

I kept repeating it to myself, and to some extent it worked. I was walking at the pace of a healthy pony, and it hurt only to the point of making me groan and sweat.

So I walked, and I walked through the woods, until I saw a light, I got closer, a boarded up window, the pain was increasing, I got close. Relief, so close, I just need to get in there. Just a few painful steps away.

I went through a hole in a ruined fence, and Limped closer to the ruined two storey cubic house surrounded by it. The calming silence and the concert of grasshoppers all around me was broken by the loud banging of my hoof on the door.

I leaned on a wall next to the door and banged again while breathing heavily. My legs felt like jelly, ready to give in at any moment. Then I heard hoofsteps, hard and fast clanking against a floor, then the door opened, and a face of an older, but sweet looking mare stuck out of a pitch black inside of the house.

“Who is that?” She asked, looking somewhere into the woods in front of the house.

“I need a– Place to– Sleep.” I gasped, every word felt heavy, speaking felt like spitting heavy iron blocks out of my lungs. What the fuck was happening to me? Was it something with that water? Did that cocksucker in a hut poison me with something?

As soon as she heard me, she turned her head in my direction, albeit not looking straight at me.

She’s blind. Oh thank the wasteland!

“I..” She let out a series of grunts, series of wavering and indecisiveness,

“Listen. If you won’t–” Fuck.

Fine, let's give it a try. I hope that cocksucker in a hat wasn’t just trying to get rid of me.

“P…” Ugh, “Please.” The word felt like a huge, heavy metal ball that was painfully making its way through my throat, while I tried to make it sound as not-pathetic as it was possible.

She looked at me, her face showing that she clearly sensed the difficulty I had with talking at this state.

And then, a sudden shirek, a screech of a foal inside the house stuck my ears like needles.

Whatever made that sound– I already hate it– Even thinking was coming with a difficulty now.

“A Raider!” shouted in a high pitch foalish voice followed.

Fallout Equestria - A Raider With A Heart

by Felfox

Chapter 1 (Rewritten from scratch) - Next time, I will control myself, I promise!

I'm going to get myself a gun!

That's what it's all about

A moment worth appricieating

Luna you bitch!