Rain Pressures and Soothes
Rain pattered down on the balcony, making it glisten from faint distant light. Twilight looked on glumly through her window, resting her hoof against the windowpane.
A faint light glowed from horn. It was amazing how, although its morning, the grey clouds made it seem more like it's night. As soon as the storm began, everything went dark. A part of Twilight's mind thought it was fascinating. And somehow, she liked it.
She let a small smile grace her face. She was glad there wasn't always complains to hear. Neither any concerns. Just the sound of falling rain and occasional thunder.
After a long while, she decided she wanted to go outside. She wanted to feel the rain. Perhaps it would soothe her other worries. It could lift her grey-shaded mood. With the war of conflict in her head, why wouldn't she have a dark cloud hanging over her? She couldn't think of anything better.
Turning away from the window, she exited her room and started down the hall. After passing some other hallways and stairs, she made it to the door. Using her magic, she pulled them open.
Slowly, she stepped out, shutting the door behind. Wandering farther out, rain fell upon her. To her disappointment, it wasn't nearly the same affect as she had assumed. The rain was both soothing and pressuring. It reminded her again of her position.
Ponies thought being a princess was about being perfect and having a perfect life. Howbeit, the reality, was the exact opposite. As a princess, she has to perform duties beginning from the early morning all the way to late night. Not to mention also having to deal with controversy. Some ponies loved her and others... didn't. Most believed she was too young and regular to achieve such a rank. Some said so because they didn't like her personality. Others say she simply doesn't deserve it because she's nowhere near like Princesses Celestia, Luna, and Cadence. And she constantly had to fight with all her willpower to not burst out into tears or show how much it hurt when she faced them.
Even after the amount of times I threw myself into danger to protect them.
And ponies had seen her. With her friends and facing the villain head-on. She'd done so to protect Equestria. To protect it's ponies. So they wouldn't be hurt. In return she expected gratitude from her subjects. She thought they would love and appreciate her. She thought they would give a shout-out to her and her friends when they spoke of ponies they most respected.
But no.
Aside from the few that did like her, she only received complains. She only received hate and negativity. She would never be good in their eyes. Never as good as Luna, Celestia and Cadence. Only they were real princesses, treated almost like goddesses. The colts and fillies loved Luna in particular. But she was just in their shade. On public appearances where she and the princesses would appear together, most ponies attentions would be entirely on those three. Some would forget she's even there.
She only ever spoke truthfully about her feelings with her friends, Spike, and , admittedly, Luna too. She never told Celestia or Cadence. She only told Luna. Reason being because Luna found out in her dream. So she ended up telling her. In return, Luna had smiled and said of how she could relate to her once upon a time. When she was ignored as well. But then she would remind the lavender princess she shouldn't let another's opinion get to her. Twilight tried to follow her advice, but mostly fails.
Her friends would comfort her to the best of their abilities. Unlike Twilight, they were also loved much by ponies. Fluttershy because she's a beauty queen. Including her gentleness, Discord's reformation, and making a massive dragon cry. Pinkie Pie is loved because of her happiness and funny personality. Rarity is loved because, just like Fluttershy, she too is a beauty queen and fashionable. Twilight could name many stallions with a crush on Rarity. Rainbow Dash was very loved too. Mostly by foals and The Wonderbolts. They all liked her awesomeness and athletic spirit. Lastly, ponies also loved Applejack. Her strength and singing voice are a few reasons why.
But Twilight could admit her friends did have irresistible personalities. What was she? Just a boring, perfect princess? She couldn't agree any less. She was boring.
And I can't agree any less either.
Twilight sighed. It came no surprise to her he spoke now. He only ever began speaking if she really needed him. Or if he caught her thinking or saying something negative about herself. He loved to pick on her weaknesses.
Of course, I do.
Come on, Twilight thought back with a groan. Can't you leave me in peace if you don't have anything nice to say.
I'm never nice. Technically, he said.
As if that didn't state the bottom line about her "friend."
We are not friends. I don't make friends with enemies, he said in a way you couldn't think he's joking.
He was in her head to use her. Twilight had figured out a long time ago. But Twilight hadn't told on him, so she wasn't sure his treatment of her is fair.
I made you not tell. You know the price you'll have to pay if you do.
Which is: he'll control her mind cause somehow he can from in her head. And then he'll make her go and murder her own friends.
Exactly. I'm relieved you remember. He paused, then added, if you still don't believe the mind-controlling part, I can always show you again.
Twilight stiffened. No thanks, she cried. She already had a taste of how that felt. He would do something which would take away the part of her mind that made her her. And then she would feel nothing, just his voice vibrating inside her.
Its one of the influences of Dark Magic. You could attach the power with negative thoughts, which is enough to allow me to take over the rest of your mind. That one bad thought I used will burden you so much, you wouldn't think of anything else. And In this case, that thought would be your reluctance of becoming a princess. You think outliving your friends is so sad and unbearable.
Because it is, Twilight shot back. How would I be the Princess of Friendship if I have no friends?
You poor, tragic filly, he cooed. Twilight didn't miss the mocking note of his voice. This is your reward for looking up to your wise and precious mentor.
Now Twilight jerked up. "You don't know anything about Celestia", she snapped, momentarily forgetting she could communicate with him through her thoughts.
She heard a quiet hmm, until his response came. Actually, I quite do know about Celestia. I know some things about her even you might not know.
Twilight glared hard. "Sombra, are you telling me this cause you think i'll betray Celestia and join you? So I can become your evil puppet?"
She flinched when he began laughing. A sound that vibrated, uncomfortably through her mind.
Of course, not, he said, his laughter waning, tone becoming serious again. What would I do with you? Even if it would be rather satisfying to watch you strangle your mentor, I much prefer doing my conquests myself. So I would feel pride from my own well deserved victory. I only resort to using others if I have a good reason. And my form of corrupting is simply mind-controlling you to get rid of my enemies. Once I'm done, I'll just toss you in the dungeon until I decide to do something else.
"What If I rot by the time you do decide to do something else?"
Then I forget you ever exist.
"Why are you so heartless?" she asked with a shiver.
Because I'm evil.
"can't you care the slightest, at least, for someone who's dying?"
Only if you are of use. Otherwise, I don't care. Or if you deserve to live.
"What do you mean?"
As in, if you are resistant and have tried to fight me. I, personally, like strong, resistant mares. I dislike weak, cowering ones. So in that case, if I think you deserve to live, you live. If I don't, then you die.
Twilight sighed again. She was likely not on Sombra's list of strong, resistant mares because she's boring and perfect. So she would die.
I'm debating on you.
Oh, nice, Twilight thought with mock relief. Its not like I would be worried about being debated on to be kept dead or alive. That's usually my favorite thing, thank you.
You're not funny, Sombra stated flatly.
Twilight felt tears go down her face. "I wasn't trying to be", she responded. Her voice was both sour and choked. A lump twisted in her throat.
You really are a delicate, little flower. Thinking you would never be like your pink friend because your boring and perfect.
More tears fell down Twilight's cheeks. No matter what she would do, she'll never be good enough. Not in the eyes of her subjects. She was just a useless button attached on a coat.
Although Equestria strictly needs you.
"what," she gasped. Her mane was completely straight from the rain.
You were, after all, forced to take this responsibility of protecting Equestria by your amazing teacher. She practically wrote down your entire life on a scroll. After one event, she checks the scroll again to see what to do next.
Is that really true though. No matter what Celestia might be doing, Twilight still felt like making Celestia proud was a priority. She's almost a second mother to her.
Tsk, second mother.
"there's no lie to that Sombra," Twilight admitted. "Celestia's been looking after me since I got my cutie mark. She believes in me and says I'll do the things she couldn't."
Perhaps. I suppose her moon-licking sister's return is one example of that.
You have a very weird way of comforting, you know. But thanks, I guess. Twilight paused before adding, also Luna's not moon-licking.
She behaves that way.
No she doesn't. She's a lot better than you.
By how much?
By eternities.
Yet I never vowed to create eternal night which would have ended all life in Equestria. Moonlight isn't required to grow plants and food.
Says the pony who enslaved all the citizens of the Crystal Empire and may have also abused some poor residents. I think I pick Luna over you. At least, she wasn't harming anyone. She just wanted for ponies to love her and her night.
You can have your opinion, it doesn't affect me.
Twilight looked ahead, taking a few steps forward. She raised her head to the sky, closing her eyes. A small smile formed on her face.
The rain feels nice, she thought.
But it pressures as well. In everything, little one, there are pros and cons. In other words, even if you build Equestria a bright future, there will still be bits of darkness which remain. Nothing can be perfect, and neither can you.
Twilight's eyes flew open as those words settled in her head. What she just heard, she wasn't sure if she was hallucinating. But those last words "and neither are you."
She felt her heart jump when she heard his voice again.
I meant it. Nothing is perfect. Perfection is an impossible destination for anything. You aren't perfect. In fact, you're irritating in many ways.
A flat look passed over Twilight's face again. Once again, she thought. You have a really weird way of comfort.
Well what do you expect? You think I, of all ponies, would be good at comfort? And besides, you are irritating.
How? Twilight demanded.
When you keep giving me your pointless speeches about goodness. When you panic and obsesse with checklists. When you make the utmost, stupidest decisions.
I see.
Twilight raised her head again, closing her eyes, feeling the rain. Her thoughts went back to Sombra's words. When he said nothing would be perfect, no matter what Twilight or anypony else did. There will always be darkness.
But, I guess, thats fine, she thought. I wouldn't like the world to be perfect either.
Overhead, lightning flashed with a bright, electric bolt. The sound of a thunderclap came followed. The rain poured on. Twilight's fur was completely soaked.
Your fault for standing out here.
Twilight's brow's furrowed. I didn't ask, she shot back.
She practically felt his resulting eye-roll. What was your purpose for coming out here anyways?
I like the rain, Sombra. The sound and feeling calms me. Also helps me relieve stress, which is important for a pony's health.
Hmmm, rain. I don't think I've seen such a thing often.
Twilight snorted a giggle. Of course, you haven't. You probably spent more than half of your life in the Arctic. Where there's just snow and ice.
Indeed.
How does it feel, though? The rain?
It's alright, I suppose. It would never be as beautiful or fascinating as snow but Its still... alright.
Twilight gazed ahead. The rain slowed and the clouds began to clear. Shafts of sunlight shined through the clearings.
Twilight felt her eyes widen with wonder as an arc of colors slowly appeared before the dark clouds. Gradually, the colors brightened, shining more and more vibrant.
A rainbow, she thought with awe.
How girly.
Shut up.
Make me.
Twilight ignored him. She simply looked on at the dazzling view. The gorgeous hues now gleamed and contrasted completely with the dark background. It was so magestic, so elegant and lightheartening. Twilight felt her own soul feel alive and better.
So much cringyness.
Complain all you want. I love this. And I feel happy. So happy. Despite the stress and burden I'm under, I can still make room for happiness and self-care. I love the rainbow, Sombra. Even the darkness that come with it.