The Mango Heist

by Comrade Bagel Muffin

First published

Poached Mango attempts to get a mango from Celestia's Royal Mango Grove

How one brave little bat pony managed to beat the odds, sneak past the royal guard into Celestia's mango grove and then out run her pursuers to safety. All for the greatest tasting mango she's ever had.

Featured on 10/17/2021
Merci Beaucoup. Thank you to everybody who upvoted, and added it to their libraries, I am extremely grateful. HAZAA!!!

Cover Art done by Leastways.

Juicy Mangoy Goodness

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The bat ponies of Equestria were known for about five key things: they were the ponies that sided with Nightmare Moon, second they like to do all of their work and stuff at night, the third is that they have great night vision and hearing, four was they had beautiful squeaky voices, and lastly they had a near psychological obsession with mangos. It was this last most popular bit of knowledge that kept the guards on constant patrols through the palace gardens. Especially through the mango grove, which was the subject of near countless attempted raids both day and night by the members of the night guard.

It was for one of these raids that Poached Mango was laying as low to the palace’s roof as she possibly could. The treasured mango grove of Celestia was no more than five hundred meters away, and the wind carried the sweet sweet mangoy goodness right to her nose. She had to constantly wipe her mouth because of the saliva. From her vantage point she could hear two of the guards talking and she had to wait till they left.

“There you are Freeze!” Both guards ended their conversation. Poached went ridged her mission to the mango grove hadn’t even started and she was already found out. Until her ears twitched again, the sounds of unshoed hooves along the cobble path. A mission to get the sweet juicy mangos had ended in failure, but it wasn’t hers. She heard the guards gallop off to intercept the poor bat that was now caught in an ever-tightening net, and she took her chance. She bolted on completely muffled wing down into the royal garden. It was to much of a risk to dive straight into the grove, her own fifteen attempts at that had ended in failure, let alone the hundreds of other bats that had tried and instantly caught by pegasi or unicorns.

Poached quickly climbed a tree and began to move slow and steady in the shaded branches. They were looking for a bat pony on the ground so one in the branches could maneuver hopefully unnoticed. Her ears constantly swiveled around on her head. Following the constant chase through the garden while also keeping an ear out for any approaching guard. Fortunately, who ever it was, was providing a good distraction, as she moved from tree to tree in the branches of Orange and Apple trees. She stopped as the trees thinned out as a cobble stone walk way separated her from the next part of the Royal Garden.

“Eeeeeeeeeee!” She froze not even two hundred meters away from her goal.

“May Night Mother Forgive.” She whipered with a hushed breath. Certainly, whoever had been providing her this glorious distraction had just been caught. The guard would likely take them to a waiting room until Celestia asked for an apology from them for getting caught trying to steal from her mango grove. Which always happened just before bed time for her, or right after she started her daily business.

“That one got close, they were just about to pick a mango from the branches of the tree.” She froze in place. As one of the guard’s voices picked up not too far from her. Had he had the excellent hearing of a bat pony her little comment would have given her away.

“It doesn’t even matter if you pick it you still have to escape the garden with it, and that’s not happening.” Another one agreed. The two earth pony guards walked underneath her. The armor they wore disguised their true mane and coat colors.

“We’ll just see about that.” She muttered quietly under her breath, then looking left, right, up, and down four times just to be sure she was in the clear before she jumped across. She grabbed the tree she collided with and quickly climbed up it. She had a theory that the ground was enchanted to give the guards the advantage, and the sky was just as enchanted, but surely, they couldn’t enchant the branches of the trees, could they?

She continued on eighty meters clear. Fifty, still completely clear. Thirty meters, noise she stopped, three pegasi were flying overhead she gulped as she watched them carefully, after a minute she was sure they moved on, and she continued. Until after what felt like an eternity, she finally reached it. The mango grove of Celestia. All the sweetest and juiciest mangos in the world were rumored to grow on these trees. Only one in ten thousand bat ponies, every year ever got to taste one of the sweet mangos, this was the closest she’d ever gotten to them.

“Sweet mangoy goodness.” She slowly moved from an apricot tree to the mango tree. She couldn’t climb in it’s branches she moved fast picking on mango and plucking it from the branch. Her ears perked up, as an alarm started going off. “Off course they don’t have to enchant every tree in the garden just the mango ones!” She screamed, not caring if they heard her at this point it was all a race to get out before a she was caught. The open sky offered a tempting promise of fast flying but as unicorn could just as easily grab her with magic so, through the garden it was.

“Stop right there!” The voice was of one of the Earth pony guards from earlier.

“Catch me if you think you can!” She screamed back. She bolted as a bolas wrapped around the tree trunk where she had been. She bobbed and weaved flying as fast and hard as her wing could through the garden. She broke hard as two pegasi landed in front of her nearly tackling her to the ground. “EEeeeeeeeeee!” She made a hard right and continued through the trees.”

“Stop her!” They yelled.

“Come on! Come on!” She cried panic of losing the juicy mango in her hooves compelling her to fly harder and faster. One hundred meters to the garden’s edge. Five more bolas flew by her. One warping itself around her hind hoof slowing her down. Seventy meters. Four more pegasi dived down at her one of them nearly pinning her to the ground had she not spun away at the last second. Thirty meters. A unicorn ran onto the path their horn glowing, she could feel herself being forced to a stop. Ten meters, another bolas wrapped around her this time her wing she hit the ground and rolled. The mango held tightly to her chest. Poached lay there on the ground sobbing like a foal. It wasn’t fair, she’d got the mango. It was in her hooves. She waited for the cruel moment when one of the guards would take it from her. It never happened instead a soft hoof patted her mane.

“You did a good job getting out of the garden those last couple of meters looked like they really hurt your not injured are you?” Poached sniffed and looked up. Celestia was floating her up and looking her over like a mom would look over a foal that just fell of their bike.

“I’m fine please don’t take the mango.” Poached sniffed her lower lip quivering.

“I’m not.” Celestia gave her a gentle laugh and put her back on the ground patting her head. “You got out of the garden with the mango. So, you won it.” She smiled. “Tonight, you can eat with Luna and me, and tell us how you did it. Though don’t think that it’ll be so easy for you to win next time. Until dinner. Enjoy your mango.”

“Okay, thank you.” She sniffed but gave Celestia a big smile. Before trotting of to enjoy the mango, after all Celestia herself had given her the order.