Older, yes. Wiser, perhaps? If he had learned anything, he wouldn't be there. Offered a new chance to visit Equestria, he takes it, not understanding just how much it has changed since the first time. At least he lacks wings or a horn.
Older, yes. Wiser, perhaps? If he had learned anything, he wouldn't be there. Offered a new chance to visit Equestria, he takes it, not understanding just how much it has changed since the first time. At least he lacks wings or a horn.
The prequel is not required or even suggested. This is a new story in a new world. It is only by the magic of authorship that one of the characters happens to be the same, but even they have been through quite a bit that was never written about. Come on in fresh, it's quite alright.
Being written for a lovely patron of my patreon. Scheduled at the start for 2 updates a month.
A shrill shriek of horror began things. Fortunately, it did not became a wave across the populace. Though some looked curiously, others ignored it pointedly, as if trying their very best to not look on purpose. The strange creature that walked down the street with a purpose was not one of them.
On the other hoof, he didn't have wings. He didn't have a horn. He didn't fit any of the classic tales of things that would deliver doom upon them. But they were also unknown, so it was a mild step up at best.
"Excuse me." A pudgy mare moved towards him, adjusting her glasses as she went. "You're bothering everypony else."
"Am I? Sorry." The strange biped shrugged his shoulders lightly. "Wasn't trying."
"You are doing an excellent job for 'not trying'." She inclined her head faintly. Her glasses had lashes, just like she did, he noticed. "My name is Phyllis. Do you have a name?"
"David." He offered a hand towards her, to her confusion.
"David, right..." She clearly did not see David as a soothing name.
"You're the mom," he suddenly blurted. "Shit."
"I am a mother, and I would prefer you not use obscenities in public." She huffed in visible annoyance. "How do you know that?"
"Sorry." He held up both hands placatingly. "I was just surprised. Still, thank you. That helps a lot."
"You're... You didn't answer the question." She came in at a circle, squinting at the strange new creature. "Ponies are scared because they don't know who you are. And when you're scared, you have to be prepared."
David considered that a quiet moment. "Assuming you only ever saw the one of me, there isn't much to prepare for. As creatures go, I'm at least 90% harmless. No grand ambitions, no awesome, or scary, powers." He wriggled his fingers. "I do have these, useful things. Speaking of that, since you're here, is there any room for a writer around here, and do you have a typewriter or computer?"
"Neither of those are cheap," she retorted with a fresh frown. "And you don't... seem to be something with a lot of bits... Are do you?" She leaned left and right as if to peek at his pockets. "You have something in there."
"I do." He fished out a wallet, its sides boldly displaying ponies. Sure, they were G4 ponies, the princesses specifically. But he was flipping it open, not focusing on the outside. "I will be super surprised if any of these are valid around here." He fanned out a collection of credit cards.
Phyllis' snout brushed his arm aside, her eyes on something dangling from him. "Why do you have a unicorn hanging from you?" She wrinkled her snoot as she backed a step. "We're supposed to... It's still new, and here you are, some new creature, wearing a picture of one of them?"
He looked to the dangling keychain ornament. It was a unicorn's neck and head, a classic drawing of a horned horse with a mystical background. "Wow, I forgot I was even wearing that, but it fits where I am." He rubbed it lightly before releasing it, his interest already abating. "Speaking of that, sorry, but I'm new here, and I don't want to be a hobo."
"You're going to ask me for money, aren't you?" asked the business owner as if she had much experience with the idea.
"I really don't want to." He shrugged helplessly. "But you need some money to get more money. How it works where I'm from. Is it different here?"
"Do you need any help, Miss Cloverleaf?" A new pony was arriving on the scene, a stallion with a sure smile.
David began to snap a finger. "Oh, you're... you... The sheriff!" The name refused to come to him. "And your buddies!" He was looking at the animals that stood in firm support of their pony friend. "They're just as cute as I would have hoped for." Really, all the ponies were adorable.
Hitch quirked an ear at the strange creature, but his eyes were on Phyllis. She nodded at him, turning away from David. "This strange creature has no bits and was asking me for some. He's a nuisance, but doesn't seem to be a threat." She rolled her eyes as she began to walk away. "Good luck with that one."
"Sorry for the fuss." David half-shrugged with an aborted little chuckle. "Really, not trying to be a pain."
"Nice to meet you." Hitch offered a hoof much as David had a hand before. "Name's Hitch, sheriff of this fine municipality."
"Hitch! Right, that was it." David looked pleased with having the name provided. "David." He met the hoof with a balled fist, bumping the two together, which seemed to work for Hitch. "I wasn't planning to come here, but too late to avoid that. I need to make a living, not looking for handouts."
"You..." Hitch considered David, appraising him without guile. "What are you?"
"Human." David shrugged at that. "Not sure how helpful the name is."
"Not at all." Hitch began to walk past David. "Come with me. Let's get something in you while we figure out what to do with you."
David followed without complaint. A new world, perhaps, but the ponies were still friendly creatures in the end. "I'll eat anything but rice or cheese." It struck him. "Oh... And not flowers or grass."
"Picky eater?" laughed out Hitch.
"Nah." David rolled a hand in the air. "Just don't want to be poisoned. Humans may be omnivores, but we can't eat all the plants a pony can."
But that is not how it began. A man typed on his computer. He did that most mornings. He was paid to do so by people who enjoyed ponies and his words enough to pay him to do so. He did not mind the job, if it could be called a job. A side gig? That implied there was a central gig, but there wasn't. He wore many hats and did many things to produce the money that he managed.
But he was proud of what he had accomplished, and he wrote, typing busily about some fanfiction or another, probably a silly one with tired tropes. You wouldn't want to read it.
His dog, Django, rang a bell. It was a trick he had taught the small dog when he was a puppy. When he wanted to go out, he'd bat at some hanging bells to ask for that. David grumbled, but rose, moving to give the dog what he desired. Since the door was open, he exited the house. "May as well check on the rabbit."
He had not owned a rabbit for long. He hadn't planned on starting, but things had happened, and a rabbit resulted. He was the one who took care of it. There was no other person in the house that could be trusted with the task. The rabbit was there, eager to see him by the way it began to move and hop at his approach. He opened the cage and the rabbit hopped free of the hutch, exploring eagerly.
David took the chance to remove the bottom of the top half of the hutch to empty it of what a rabbit makes. He slapped the wood against the ground, and the world ceased to be.
Caught mid-slap, he was still holding part of the hutch in the void he found himself, looking around, confused. "The hell?"
Hey.
The words appeared in glowing letters in the air.
Do I need to explain this?
"Damn it." An explanation was actually not required. David knew what was happening. "Seriously, how is this going to work?"
Do you mean the steps? I thought you would know that.
"Not that." David waved away the idea. "This story relies on the actor, that's me." He hiked a thumb at himself. "--not understanding what's going on. I know. I know way too much for this to work."
Well, maybe with that attitude.
"Using my words against me." David laughed, rather than looking annoyed. "That figures, seeing as you are me."
Sorta but not really?
David hissed a breath, rubbing through his thick hair. "Yeah, I guess that's true. Wouldn't be the first time I argued with myself, and lost."
Probably not the last either. Shall we get on with it then? You know how this works. You get one thing to bring with you. One thing.
"Right, and what I'm wearing or holding right now doesn't count." He put down the fragment of the rabbit hutch that smelled strongly of rabbit bodily functions. "I will not take that, even if it's free. Look, I wrote this story before."
Great, so tell me what you're bringing and stop delaying.
"The better the thing I ask for, the harder the situation. That was all grand and adventurous last time. Boy, was I an idiot. I thought I was old, back then." He rubbed his equally thick but short beard. "Ten years ago was it? I'm middle aged, well in it now. I don't want to be sent to a mountain top."
You already have the answer.
"Right. I'll just go with what I have." He pated his shirt and pants and noticed. "Oh." He lifted his activity tracker attached to his arm. "Will this stay charged?"
No, but if you put it on a wireless charger, it'll charge. They have those.
David was fairly certain his band was not normally wirelessly chargeable, still, a blessing. "Doesn't count against me, right?"
You were already wearing it. I'm not that mean.
"Yes I am." David smirked at the text that was also himself. "Alright, not taking anything. Put me in a nice, not immediately dangerous, place. Are you sure you want to write this? I'm not going to leap into adventure."
You don't know yourself as well as you think you do. Now, to be fair, I should ask where you want to go, but I already know that, and I don't need to pretend I don't.
"We're not having any harems this time, right?"
That's at least partially up to you.
"Gr--" But he was not in a void anymore. He was standing in a busy street, ponies wandering past in either direction. His eyes darted from fuzzy creature to fuzzy creature. All earth ponies. Relatively modernish city. The air smelled faintly of salt, implying they were close to the ocean.
"Maretime Bay," he concluded. "Gen five. Well, damn it. I don't... know much about that." He frowned, one advantage removed. "But I do know ponies."
"Are you a monster?" He looked to the side to see a little colt peering up at him curiously.
"Hello there." David sank down into a crouch to be more on level with the cute little creature. "I'm not here to hurt any pony."
"Tha's good!" The colt reared up, cycling its forehooves in the air. "If you were, I'd have to kick you!"
David decided he was not all that scared of the young colt. "Please don't do that." Not that he wanted to be kicked, even by a foal. "What's your name?"
"You're a stranger." The foal stuck out his tongue. "So I don't gotta tell ya." And off he fled, galloping and laughing in delight. He would not help David, but he hadn't worsened the situation at all.
"Alright... Alright..." David rose back to his full height, considering the city and its possibilities. "Shoot, shoulda brought some coins." He thought to the heavy coins he had at home. Would they have been worth anything? No way to know, and far too late to ask for them.
"Crap, where do I go?" He started down the road, cycling his arms strongly. Always walk like you had someplace to be, that was a motto he had learned long ago and stuck to, in Equestria or not.
A shrill scream broke him from his momentary flow. He had encountered the start of the chapter.
A burger sat before him. It smelled good, but also not of meat. It was more of an explosion of carbs, a thing David had learned to care about. Still, it was also new, and one time wouldn't kill him, he decided. The freshly toasted bun wrapped what tasted like a big thick hashbrown with bits of something he couldn't quite put a finger on. Was this a hayburger?
There were some fishsticks also provided, and a diet soda. "Thanks again. You don't owe me anything, I know that."
Hitch waved a hoof away. "Nonsense. You seem like you want to be a reasonable citizen... whatever you are. It's my job to help. Now, you mentioned being an omnivore. I am obliged to check if that includes ponies?"
"Technically. But in all practicality, no. First, you can ask me not to, which rules you right out because I'm not an unthinking monster. Second, even if I was starving and a pony fell over in front of me, I have no idea how to... prepare them." David gestured around vaguely. "I'm just as used to modern living as you are. If my food isn't in a package, I get confused. I know how to cook, but not how to butcher."
He took a sip from the soda. "Funny how that tastes different." Not corn syrup? The odds were very high the ponies were not using corn syrup. That was a human thing. "But good." Oh god, what did ponies use as artificial sweeteners?
Hitch considered the tall, yet slight, creature. "I'm glad to hear that, you having basic manners. Wouldn't wanna chew on nothing that asked me politely not too either."
"I'm curious." David was looking at the crab that was standing on the bar just past his plate. "You ever try talking to them?"
"Huh?" Hitch leaned in closer to the little crab. "I talk to them all the time. They usually listen, why? I don't know why, and they aren't always doing what I say." He thrust a hoof to the floor. "You know you don't belong on the counter."
The crab scuttled off the bar, taking up a new position near Hitch, looking ready to take action like a little shelled warrior.
"Just to place myself properly." David scratched at his beard a moment. "Ponies got their magic, right?"
"Huh? Yeah." Hitch inclined his head towards the window, where no such hints were visible. "Pegasi can fly. Unicorns can float things."
And earth ponies got nothing, David heard spoken silently. "Alright, so, you've talked at your animal friends, but have you tried listening to them?"
Hitch's brows fell in unison. "They're animals. You know that, right?"
"Animals that listen to what you say and do what you ask." David shrugged gently. "Pretty smart. Besides, we're animals too. We just have words. Not that big of a difference."
"Why don't you talk to them then?" Hitch plucked up the crab between his hooves and held it out towards David. "Here you go."
"Hello there." He considered the angle a moment before getting a finger in to rub at the crab's shell carefully. "Thanks for helping Hitch." The crab didn't seem overly pleased or displeased by the attention. "I'm not you, Hitch. You have that knack. Cute crab, but he's not listening to me."
Hitch placed the crab right where he had said for it not to be, on the counter. "Well, what do you think?" He looked at the crab pointedly. An ear twitched up. "Huh? Oh, yeah. He says we're wasting time." He swiveled his stool towards David. "We have to get you settled in. Now, you seem reasonable enough. You know how money works, right?"
"I'm used to doing it digitally, but I know how to use coins too." David shrugged softly. "Don't suppose that's a thing?"
"Digital? Oh, right. Yeah, that's a thing. I think it's more popular with the pegasi." Hitch frowned with renewed thought. "They love their contraptions. Great, you know how it works. Now--" He coiled on himself, producing a bag he set on the counter. "I'll--"
"Hey, boss." A new pony arrived. "No trouble on the west side." He hopped right up onto the next stool. "You leaving?" His eyes were on the jingly bag of likely coins.
"Hey Sprout. Maybe you could help." Hitch turned his chair towards the new pony. "See the creature behind me?"
"Hard to miss." Sprout squinted at David with clear suspicion. "You... have that under control?"
"He's as scary as a random unicorn." Hitch looked entirely unworried.
Unlike Sprout. "Yeah, random unicorn... I know we've, uh... made friends with those, but what about those." He thrust a hoof at David at the last word. "I don't remember anything about that."
"Seems alright." Hitch knocked the bag over with a swipe of his hoof as he turned back to David. "You can have these, to get you started. Sprout, help him find a cheap place to live."
"Me?!" Sprout fluffed up. "I don't know anything about... whatever it is."
David held up both hands flat to Sprout. "Sorry for the trouble. Not trying to make a fuss."
Sprout squinted, but also hopped down to his hooves. "Well, alright then. I'm on the case, boss. But if he goes berserk, I'm runnin', just so we're clear."
"Crystal." Hitch nodded at David. "He'll get you somewhere safe. We'll talk more later, alright?"
David snatched a fishstick for the road. "Thanks for being awesome." He jingled the coin bag, wondering how much value he actually held. "Not to look a gift horse in the mouth." The pun struck him a moment after speaking it, but he went right ahead. "But do you normally spend your own money on things you find on patrol?"
Sprout snorted loudly at that. "He's like that. Besides, he'll write a full report on it and get recouped by the city so long as it's not for anything crazy." He threw his head towards David. "Like inviting a strange creature to rent a house!"
"Shoo." Hitch waved Sprout away, a gesture the crab emulated without prompting, both dismissing Sprout.
"Whatever. This way." Sprout led the way out of the little eatery up a hill towards what seemed to be many houses and apartments. "How many bits did he give you?"
An excellent question! David began plucking coins free. They had a number on them. A value, he had to assume, and he realized that counting them all would be a pain. So, out came his phone... or so was the plan. The phone was still sitting on his desk, a world away. He rarely had it on his person unless he was leaving his house, and going into the backyard to care for the animals did not count as that.
"Dang it."
"What?" Sprout moved to his side. "You can count, right?"
"Yeah, yeah. I just forgot something at home." And he got to counting the old fashioned way. "Sixty-so bits," he eventually arrived at after being forced to restart a few times. "How good is that?"
"Good enough." Sprout advanced past David. "You're kinda tall."
"Guilty." No argument against that when facing a pony that was small to begin with came to him. "Is that bad?"
"Means you need a tall place, unless you want to crawl around." Sprout rolled his eyes as if explaining something obvious. "So..." He turned slowly, pointing at each building before shaking his head and moving to the next. "No... No... Oh! He started forward anew. "You said you like digital stuff, right?"
"Sure do." David fell in without being told. "What have you got?"
"New place." Sprout nodded as they closed with a building with bright neon signs in its front window. "You'll like it, probably. High ceilings."
It turned out to be a public computer room. An Internet café, with ponies in the various stalls, clicking and moving their mice, quite focused on whatever they were doing. Some sounded like video games, others issued music, videos, or nothing at all.
"Huh..." David's eyes wandered slowly but curiously. "They have apartments here?"
"About to find out." Sprout reared up on the counter. "Hey, toots."
The mare behind the counter raised a brow at the law enforcing deputy. "Hey, Sprout was it? You need something?" Her cutie mark was that of an old-fashioned Atari joystick. Her mane drooped over one of her eyes, a brilliant purple streaked with red. Her pelt was a light green in quite the contrast. "Hitch said you're not allowed when you're on duty."
Sprout puffed in indignance. "I'm not here to play games." He pointed back at David. "This big creature needs a place to stay. Got something? Oh, he's paying."
"Well..." Her eyes shifted to David. "Aren't you a big thing. You know anything about computers?" She pointed in a slow wave across the many in the room.
"Yes," he said without pause, only to then immediately pause. "I'm comfortable with technology, but am new in town, and this... country." World felt like too big a word to spring on a random shop-mare. "I'll need a little bit to catch up on the specifics of how they work here."
"Great." She leaned over the counter, looking up at him. "The name's Joypad. You?"
"David." They met, fist to hoof in a friendly greetings. "Nice to meet you."
"Same. Most ponies around here get all glassy eyed when you ask them how a computer works, so getting tech support? Hard, and expensive. I'll give you a week." She directed a hoof upwards. "You can stay with me upstairs, come with me down here to work during the day. You figure it out and help me keep them running, we'll make it a long term gig."
David clapped his hands together. "That sounds great. I've done tech support before. I'm not opposed to that. I'm also a writer."
"Sorry." Joypad shrugged at that. "Don't have much use for writing. Let's stick to tech support, alright? What are you anyway?"
Sprout began for the door. "Mission complete. Have fun." And he was gone without any hesitation, glad to set that responsibility aside at the earliest opportunity.
David leaned faintly. "Sorry if this is rude, but that." He directed towards her cutie mark. "You play console games?"
Her visible eye shined. "You know the difference between a console and a PC game? We are going to get along just fine." She stepped down from her chair and came around the counter. "Since we're asking awkward questions about bodies, your hair." Her eyes were on his, his beard and mane. "Those natural colors, or are you as old as you look?"
David began to color faintly, difficult to see under his dark skin. "I'm not that old."
"For this place." She waved over the area. "You are a fossil. But you seem to know what you're talking about, which is impressive. So, gonna guess you are a grey-mane. Awesome. Speaking of that." She reared up to poke him in the chest. "What are you? You look like you stepped out of Warriors of Evermarsh 3."
Not a franchise David was familiar with... "Human, actually."
"Get out!" She began to dance in place. "You are from Evermarsh!"
David put the pieces together. "Evermarsh has humans then?" Crap, he was a videogame race... "I come in peace?"
"Well, that's good to hear." She laughed as she trotted away. "That's totally awesome! Oh oh! You have any wild magic? Are you reading my mind? What number am I thinking of?"
Alright, so the humans of Evermarsh were not Earth ones... "I have no idea, and the magic I do have is super subtle to the point of being deniable."
"Nerts." She grabbed a doorknob in her mouth and pulled the door open, pointing up a flight of stairs. "My place is up there, which is now your place too. "You can go hide up there and relax, sit yourself at a station down here, or even get to work figuring things out. It's your first day, not gonna be a jerk about it."
David sank down into the chair of a computer. One thing became clear, ponies expected, overall, bigger seats. They were made so a pony could be seated on their haunches if they wanted without an issue, which means they were bigger than strictly required to hold just a human butt. This wasn't the end of the world.
He reached for the mouse and waggled it. It only had one button. Considering what species it was made for, that wasn't too surprising. "Like a Mac?" David decided to assume it'd work like a Mac until proven otherwise. The wriggling was enough to stir the machine out of slumber, and it casually wanted him to log in. Not a username and password, but it had space for that. Much more prominently, it invited him to swipe a card, a time card for visitors of the cafe. Alright.
David pushed up to his feet, only to encounter a younger pony before he could get far. "By the deep forests," the colt said in awed respect. "The winds have delivered us a warrior."
"Huh?" David raised a hand. "Nice to meet you?"
"It is!" joyfully agreed the colt, clapping his hooves together. "What tribe are you from?"
"Pony tribe?"
"No!" The colt extended his tongue quite far out. "You're not a pony. You're a human! What tribe?"
Ah, right, it came together. That game was clearly known to more than Joypad. "The American tribe. Gonna guess you've not heard of that one."
The colt shook his head violently. "Wow, a new one! What kind of power do Americans have?"
A thousand cynical replies leaped to his tongue. Oh, there were so many American habits he could poke fun at... "This particular one is learning how the computers work, so everyone can learn more about humans."
"Wow!" got out the colt breathlessly. "That's so cool." He trotted off, aborting the conversation without a goodbye. He had become a random NPC, and one did not need to say bye to NPCs one happened to click on. What a life.
David chuckled softly at the thought, walking with purpose to the front counter, but waiting his turn like any other pony, which he was not. "Joypad." He had reached the front. "Do you have an admin user and password?"
"Already on the case?" She brushed back some of the mane carpeting one of her eyes. "Good work ethics, great. I saw you talking with Pipster over there. He didn't bother you, did he?"
"The little kid?" David hiked his thumb back towards where he had been. "Nah, just curious. I'd be even more curious if a pony wandered where I could see it where I'm from."
"Are you curious?" She eyed him with her visible eye, a smirk on her face. "The mysteries of ponies are deep and vast." She wiggled her hooves. "Just messing with you. We're earth ponies. What you see is what you get." She shrugged and grabbed a pen suddenly in her mouth. She got to scribbling and shoved it forward with a sweep of a hoof. "Here ya go."
David snatched the paper up in kind. Yep, two strings of characters, which he assumed were what he needed. "I'm on the case. Let me get out of the way." He scooted to the side to let the next pony advance. Joypad's attention slid right along to that pony very quickly, only a subtle wave of a hoof to the side so say bye with. She was on duty, and ponies needed her. David didn't press that, heading back to the computer he had started with.
He had been worried she might not even have that login. That would have raised the difficulty quite a bit, trying to perform IT without admin access. David got to typing, or would have. The keyboard was made for pony hooves, big and round pony hooves, not dexterous human fingers. "Dang it..." He reached for the keyboard with less certainty, examining the two big pads provided.
There were no keys, well, besides those two big buttons. Oh!
He swept the mouse and clicked, pow, there, an on-screen keyboard, and it even looked the same. Return of Qwerty! How ponies typed, a mystery, and one he set aside for inputting the login information. It wasn't as fast as typing, but it worked. Sometimes, that was more important.
Logged in, he was presented with a desktop. It was primitive, but it was a desktop. It had icons. It had menus. The options in the menus made sense enough. Nothing too alien, just working with an older version of the OS he was used to using. Not that big of a deal, really. "Great." He conjured a command prompt and got to typing things in. Some commands worked, some did not, but he was figuring things out. "Good..."
"I thought you were joking." Joypad had snuck up on him in his distracted state, an easy thing to do when David was working. "How did you even get that?" She waved a hoof at the command prompt he was working. "And what's that?" Her hoof homed in on the floating digital keyboard he was using.
"That is a keyboard." David inclined his head at it. "Where I'm from, they're the default thing you have in front of you." He patted the strange lump of plastic with two hoof-rests. "Not this."
"I have one of those." That got David's attention. "The pegasi I bought it, the computers, from gave one to me. They type with their wing-tips. Guess what I don't have." She waved both hooves at David. "So I put that away and forgot about it."
"I will work, like, a hundred times faster with that. Can you bring it out?"
"No." Joypad leaned in with a coy smile. "But I can tell you where it is and you can bring it out." With a lash of her tail, she turned to the door that led to her apartment. "Head upstairs." She gave the rest of the directions on how to find it. "I have to keep an eye on the store. Taking my eyes off it while it's open is a recipe for trouble."
"Right-o." That made logical enough sense. "Be right back." And David was off, hopping up the steps two at a time out of sight.
Joypad watched the space he had gone to. "Shoot..."
"You got a human!" Pipster popped up from around the corner. "He's cool! Is he like a big promo for the next game?"
"I only wish." Joypad shook her head as she looped around back towards her counter. "Just a friendly traveler from another world that knows how to fix computers."
"Get out!" Pipster was following after Joypad. "Evermarsh?"
"I don't think so." Joypad hopped up into her seat. "Another world, but I didn't ask. Why look a gift horse in the mouth?"
"He's not a horse," chastised the colt with a ripe pfft. "Don't be dumb." No, they were the horses, and not gifts. "He is a he, right? Sounded like one."
"What I'm guessing." Not like gender dimorphism of alien species was super high on the skill list of either pony. "Now, you here to get your card refilled?"
"Oh! Yeah!" Out came a few bits and his playing card.
Upstairs, David had reached Joypad's living area. "Huh." It was a gaming pad, but also a girl's area in a combination he didn't see often. "Now where..." He wandered, a bit lost at first, but moving and looking. "A keyboard..." Not having to mouse each letter! He wanted it so badly!
Boxes! They were about the right size. He popped one open to find... another hoof-board thing. He nudged it right aside and went for the box under that. No. The next? No. He huffed. "C'mon, rule of threes." It was something of a curse knowing one was in a work of writing. It came with expectations! But he wasn't giving up, working through the boxes one by one. No, it was right at the bottom. "That... makes sense, thinking about it." She had no use for it, so it being farther away than any of the ones she could use? Sure, alright. He began cleaning up the mess he had made, restacking them all neatly, minus the keyboard he wielded triumphantly back down the stairs.
"Da dun da da," he hummed in joyous music of item discovery from a game he had played long ago.
Only for a pony to start humming another tidbit. It wasn't quite right, distinct enough to avoid copyrights. David let out a little huh as he sat back down at his chosen computer and soon got the new keyboard plugged in. "Alright." And his typing power was unleashed, allowing him to monkey around instead of horsing around, much to his delight.
"Dave." Joypad was calling him. "Since you're comfortable, why not actually try fixing one?" She pointed to a computer with a big red sheet of paper over its screen, announcing its out of repair status.
Hm. "Well, it's what I'm being paid to do." He wouldn't know how well he could diagnose one that was busted without actually trying it. He worked the keyboard loose and soon had it attached to the sick computer. He wiggled the mouse to discover it was already on, which meant...
"Have you tried turning it off?"
"What?" Joypad inclined her head, clearly confused at the idea.
David brought the mouse over and instructed the computer to restart itself. "Basic IT, restart, reboot, reinstall. If you haven't tried those, you aren't even really trying." The computer made a little cheerful noise. It had rebooted. He got to typing quickly, getting the admin credentials in. "It seems fine..." He'd lucked out. In the future, problems not fixed with basic rebooting would come up, but that day... He logged back out, tossed the red paper in the trash and disconnected the keyboard.
"Ready for use." He got out of the computer just in time for a heavyset stallion to crash in front of it and get to using it. "Huh..." The timing... "Any others?"
Turned out one of the computers came unplugged from the network, and another had a similar problem with the hoof-pad. The fourth sick computer, however, was a more terminal case. It wouldn't turn on. It would not respond. It as a very expensive brick. "I can't do... much if I can't turn it on..."
Not that he wouldn't try! He held down the function keys as he started it, one by one. One worked! A boot menu came up in text. They did have a safe mode! Score! Confident he could at least try to fix that one, he got right into it.
"Hey." Joypad had snuck up on him, or he was oblivious to the world again. "Look, appreciate it, really do, but you've been jamming at that for hours now. Don't you want a break?"
But he wasn't hungry, or tired. "I'm fine, and I think I'm getting closer on this. Do you have the original install discs?" She looked lost a moment before she clopped her hooves together. "I do!" And off she went scrambling.
Which meant the store was busy not being watched. Crap. David went over to the front counter and sat in Joypad's chair, so there was someone there.
"More time." A mare slid a card forward along with some bits. Crap, a customer...
"Really sorry." David held up his hands placatingly. "She'll be right back. I'm just making sure nothing burns down in the meantime."
The mare cocked her head, brow going high. "You aren't Joypad." Apparently a fact she had only just noticed. "Crazy. What even are you?"
"That's what I wanted to know!" came the call of a stallion. The mare's question was a cue for others to stare in wonder, questioning David's existence.
"You ever play Evermarsh?" asked David with an unsure smile. "Human."
Some of the crowd nodded, clearly having played that. Many of them didn't get it, which just prompted the two parts of the crowd to chat, sharing the knowledge excitedly.
"You have a good one." Joypad was waving at her last customer, closing the door behind them with a sweep of her snout. With a twist of a hoof, she deployed the lock with a solid click. "Another day, survived." She turned back to David, who was seated in a chair, watching her. "Hey, are you hungry?"
Well, since it was brought up... "Actually, yes." It was meal time. His body clocks agreed with that assessment. "Not trying to be a--"
She had already risen a hoof. "I haven't paid you yet, or even let you sleep anyway, so right now? I'm the one behind. So stop worrying about it." She looped around to behind her counter and pressed something, the lights going off, at least most of them. "Sleepy time." She emerged with a smile from the counter. "I hear there are places like this up in Zephyr Heights that stay open 24/7. This is not one of those." She snorted in an equine way. "Imagine that?"
David frowned at the idea as he looked over at one of the slumbering computers that had a clock on it. It was 6 pm. "I am perfectly happy with this as a closing time."
"Great." Joypad nosed open the door leading to the stairs up to her room. "Come on then. We'll get some food in us." As she ascended, she turned an ear back. "Now that we aren't handling business, you mind if I ask, like, a hundred questions? Because, let's be real, you're still an alien."
"I am one of those," sighed out David, as if that was not an entirely new experience. "I'll answer one for each you answer. That's a fair trade, right?"
"Righteous." Joypad sprang into her room, David not far behind. "First of all, and important to right now, what do humans eat? There's Evermarsh, but we already established you aren't one of those, really." She turned on him. "Just similar enough."
"Second time today that came up." He moved past her to stand off to the side of the living room. "Personally, I'll eat anything without cheese or rice. I'd prefer a low-carb diet, if that's in the cards."
Joypad's eyes swept over him. "Low carb?" She suddenly brought her hooves together. "Are you a human or a pegasus? You keep talking about things only they'd really focus on. You know how to use their computers like you've been doing it forever." A sudden smirk spread. "Is that shirt just hiding your wings?"
"They do low-carb?" He had been expecting that to be entirely missed, truth told. "By which I assume earth ponies don't generally?"
"Not a worry we have." She shrugged lightly. "Carbs are, like, cakes and stuff, right?"
"And sugar," added David quickly. "Bread, sugar, potatoes. Starches and sweets." It hit him. "Fruit drinks and hard drinks. I'll eat an orange, no problem, but I'll skip on the orange juice."
"Why?" she asked as if the idea of it was an alien thing she was just learning, which was perhaps the case. "Will you get sick?"
"No, just fat." He shrugged softly. "And fat isn't healthy."
"Hey, I know plenty of perfectly healthy, rounded ponies." Joypad shrugged softly. "Gonna have to pen that down as a human thing." She waved a hoof at herself. "Not my concern. I came in average flavor." If one discounted the colors of her mane, she was a fairly standard earth mare. "
David clapped his hands together in one solid strike. "My turn. What am I being paid and if I can attach a related query, how much is a bit worth?"
She hiked a brow at him. "You just told me you're walking into this blind. Poor little foal." She began to snicker on her way into her kitchen, starting to prepare something. "Good thing I'm not that mean. Fifteen bits a day." She slapped a pan down on her stove, holding it with a hoof that had no business being able to hold the handle of a pan, not that she seemed to care what a human thought she should be able to do. "Throw in the fact that you're getting free room and board, and that isn't bad."
"How much is a computer?" That was surely one way to get a measure of things.
She squinted at him. "None of your business, also, it's my turn." She waggled her bottom as she got things going. "Oh, right. Fish. You alright with fish?"
"I am alright with fish." He nodded at that. "Didn't get to eat it too much, but nothing wrong with it."
"Great! Your turn." Fishy smells were starting to raise as she worked.
"That hardly seems fair to you." It was basically the same as the first question. "I'll pass."
"You are not good at competitive games," she taunted as she splashed some oil of some sort into the pan, shaking it lightly. "You are not a pony, but you are a male, I think? That isn't the question. I'm a female pony, as you noticed, I hope. Romantic interests, do you have any?" She wrinkled her nose. "Are you a xenophile?"
"We just met," cried David as if that should be answer enough. "You seem nice, but that's about all I could say." He shrugged softly. "I'm not interested in people I don't know, of any species." Well, it was his turn. "I'll turn that around, but broaden it a bit. Do ponies even look at not-ponies?"
"Not usually." She shrugged as she turned the pan, sliding out some food onto a plate and starting something new in short order. "I've never seen a not-pony besides you, which makes the chances to even think about that kinda small. But, pow, here I am living with one that's doing my tech support." She laughed at the absurdity of the situation, grabbing something from her fridge to toss into the pan. "So, things happen."
"Your turn," he reminded as he came closer to see what she was making. It smelled great, whatever it was. Was that lemon? "You're a good cook." He hadn't tasted it yet, but she seemed to know what she was doing, and if the smell was any hint, he'd enjoy it, he felt certain.
"Aw, flatterer." She upended the pan's new contents next to the first on the plate, flicked off the fire, and grabbed the serving plate. "Grab a fork, 'cause it's time to dig in! You don't want anything sweet, right?"
"Nope." But he could see her sink right there. He helped himself to a glass and soon had water ready to drink. "Do you usually cook for yourself?"
"Who else is going to do it?" She shrugged at that. "What about you? You know how to cook?"
"Sure." He sank down at the table she had parked at. He set the glass down and wielded a fork menacingly at the food. "Who else is going to do it?" he asked with a laugh.
She shrugged at that. "Mighta lived with a family wherever you're from. I don't know." She waved a hoof about. "This is my family." Or lack of one. "Don't look like that. My dad's doing fine, but he doesn't 'get' games. I visit him once in a while, on the west side of town." She pointed the way through a window that showed the dimming evening sky. "But, for now, food time. I'll ask the next one after."
As it turned out, the fish was as good as it smelled. He couldn't identify what fish it was, but a good one? All that mattered in the end, right? It was lightly breaded and had some lemon squeezed onto it. Fluffy greens, mildly fried, accompanied it with nuts and berries, which he was also entirely alright with, chomping down next to his new friend.
When he stopped eating, she began watching him with a new interest. "Done?"
"I don't..." He huffed lightly. "I'm a guest. I don't want to make a bad impression."
"Cute!" She pushed the plate towards him. "But I expect you to eat half. I can handle the other half."
With a clear boundary set, David went right ahead and took care of his half without objection, or hesitation. Once he decided he was going to eat something, it didn't have long for the world. "Want me to handle the dishes?"
Joypad flicked her head powerfully enough to send her mane flying, allowing both her eyes to be easily visible for a moment. "Are you trying to butter me up?" She suddenly buried her snout against the plate, finishing her half in an instant of gluttony. "Go ahead, show me your stuff."
David grabbed the plate, setting his fork on it. She hadn't used a fork. One plate, one fork, and the pan it was cooked in. That wouldn't be too hard, he figured, marching to the kitchen. The soap... There. He grabbed it and set it just beside the sink as he set the dirty things in it. But... There! A scrubby sponge. He took hold of it with a victorious smile.
With everything he needed for the task, he got to washing the few dishes down, setting them on the drying rack that was right there. "Only fair. You cooked."
"Spoken like someone who wanted that to be true." She was eyeing him with, perhaps, a knowing expression. "Look, I have friends over sometimes. They do not offer to handle the dishes unless I go out of my way to suggest it, sly like." She laughed on her way to a comfy couch that seemed quite large for the space. She hopped up and sank down to her belly in the plush surface. "Now, game time."
David walked over and stood behind the couch rather than take a seat. "What game did you want to play?"
"As if you'd know any of them," she taunted. "Except maybe Evermarsh?" She looked over her shoulder at his expression. "Maybe not even that." She clapped her hooves. "Evermarsh is a long kinda game. You know what an RPG is, right?"
"Yes." He nodded firmly. "Turn based?"
"Every time I think I got you..." David's understanding of games, still a source of amazement. "Either way, yeah! That." She thrust her hoof at him as she said it. "Not the best party game."
"I'm fine watching you play?"
Things became quiet for a long moment, the two watching each other. Joypad burst into new laughter, her cheeks darkening. "You're not trying, but, sheesh. Way to make a mare think!" She grabbed a controller that looked like it should just not work with a hoof, and soon her system was starting up. "Fine then, time to learn about what everyone's talking about. Now, I'm skipping 1 and 2, since the humans don't show up until 3, and the story's self-contained enough, you'll get it."
David came around the couch and finally took a seat next to Joypad, a little smile on his face. "It's... Wow."
"Wow?"
"I'm just remembering how long it's been since I just sat and watched someone else play games." He gestured lightly at the screen. "It's nostalgic."
"Oh no," she cried in mock terror. "I'm giving the grey mane flash backs!" She burst into snickers at that. "Speaking of that, xenophile, I'm not a greymane. And if you ask how old I am, I will punch you."
"Fourty-two," replied David without being asked.
"Huh." She started the game, conjuring up the introduction cinematic to the grand world of Evermarsh. "Evermarsh's ticket to fame is how many different crazy races they have, and you can play as any of 'em! Ponies love it. The NPCs come in all kinds of shapes too." She snickered softly. "Wow, imagine if our world was like that."
David did not laugh. He couldn't be sure, but imagined there were other species waiting to be discovered out there. The ponies had surprises ahead of them. "That would be interesting."
"There he is." A mare wearing a headset, the microphone boom in front of her mouth, was grinning, her eyes locked on the strange new biped that had become the overnight mascot of Joypad's place. "Now, according to reports, he is friendly." She wandered up towards him as she spoke, a recorder at her side slowly turning its tape, capturing her words. "But let's find out for ourselves."
"Welcome to Joypad's," greeted the strange creature named David, spotting her before she could finish sneaking up on him. "Do you have a time card?"
The mare froze, spotted! "Uh..."
"You need a time card to use the machines." The strange creature pointed one of its many digits at the array of computers available. "First time here? Just ask Joypad at the counter and she'll get you hooked up."
"It is friendly," she noted, her paralysis ending. "Hello, strange creature! I'm News Flash."
It was at that instant that David could figure out what the mare was. It was quite convenient that ponies generally had such straight forward names. "Nice to meet you, Miss Flash. Reporting on the store, or me?"
"Both?" She stepped closer by a few clops of her hooves on the tile floor. "Where did you come from? Where do you live? Are you Joypad's pet? Is Joypad your pet?
"I'm not domesticated," assured David. "Though fairly well tamed. There is a difference."
News leaned forward with shining eyes. "Do tell. What is the difference?"
David hadn't expected that, but he wasn't really opposed to explaining things, so off he went, "Alright. Domesticated animals take generations of work. You're basically making them into always-kids, trusting in their caretakers to handle most of their needs and slow to get angry or scared."
"Are they bothering you?" called Joypad from the counter. "Hey, stop pestering my tech support!" She waved a hoof at News Flash.
News cringed at the rebuke. "We're just talking. Baltimare deserves to know the truth!"
"She's not bothering me." David sank down into a sort of crouch/squat. "Now, taming is taking a wild animal and making it alright to be around. It's still wild, not domesticated, but friendlier." He pointed at News. "You are tamed. You were taught from a young age what was allowed and not allowed, but your instincts are still there."
News inclined her head left and right. "Huh! Huh! Well, who tamed you then? Was it Joypad?"
"Nah, I'm way too old. Pretty sure I'm older than Joypad, but she didn't share her age with me, so I can't be sure."
"How old are you?" She leaned in all the closer. "How old do.... What is your kind of creature called anyway?!"
"That's a human," noted somepony else at a computer that hadn't even been part of the conversation. "Duh."
"Living Evermarsh," laughed a mare not too far away.
"Hue man," News repeated, saying each syllable as its own word. "Note to self, check references for 'Evermarsh'." She cleared her throat, still looking up at David. "Do you come in peace?"
"That was a lot of questions." He stood back up. It was more comfortable standing properly. "I'm a bit over fourty and middle aged if that helps. I prefer peace by a pretty big margin." He spread those strange things wide. Hands. "You're cute, by the way."
News began to blush. "W-what?"
"I like the whole reporter outfit you have on there." He pointed from her hat to her jacket. "It's very on point."
"I do my best." She curled a hoof as she struck a proud pose. "I'm not trying to hide what I am. New Flash! Here to get all the news worth hearing. Out to every listening pony in Maretime bay!
"Newspaper?" guessed David, not seeing a single camera anywhere nearby trained on the interaction.
"Newspaper," agreed News with a firm nod. "Can you read?"
"Read, write, type, and even do math if I have to." David shrugged at that. "If you thought of me as a funny-looking pony, you'd be close to the truth."
"Are you a funny-looking pony?" A new smile grew quickly. "That would explain everything."
"I don't think so." Humanity, funny-looking ponies. Well, from a certain point of view... "More of a strange simian. Fortunately, nothing stopping a simian and an equine from getting along."
"Huh..." News leaned to one side and the other. "You're a monkey?" Her eyes dipped towards his hands. "Those look about right..."
"Only if you're a horse."
She snorted in a very horse-like way. "Point taken. David the human... stallion?" He nodded at that. "David the human stallion," she repeated more confidently. "Middle aged. That's older than I'd expect some creature to... whatever this is. You aren't from here, obviously. Where are you from?"
"What, middle aged people can't adventure?" David smiled at the idea. "I always hated that trope. Always young people sent off into strange new things. What, do we just turn into corpses the moment we're past our 20s? Besides, this isn't that dramatic of an adventure so far. I moved to a new city--" He waved about a bit vaguely. "Found a nice person, and started working for her."
"Fascinating." News was still a moment. "Joypad being the nice pony, I assume?" David nodded, words not required. "I see... Well, thank you for this interview. I may be back, but until then, keep an eye on the paper. Your story'll be in there, no doubt. Maybe even front cover!" Her eyes shone, clearly hoping that would happen. "Until then." She twirled back towards the exit, tail giving a final lash as she got to trotting away.
"You alright?" asked Joypad as David wandered past. "You can't let news ponies just shove you around. They'll never leave you alone if you don't draw a straight line in the sand."
"She wasn't bothering me." He leaned against the counter, not blocking the way for customers. "These are questions that're gonna come up. Maybe just printing them out will skip a lot of steps."
"Or bring more gawkers." Joypad brushed at her multi-colored mane with a sweep of her hoof. "Consider that?"
"Which means more hooves in your store." He waved a sweep of fingers across the busy computer café. "Sounds like a win for you."
"But what about you, dummy?" She thumped his available side roughly. "You don't want to be my freakshow, do you?"
"It's not that different. I take that back. It's different in all the right ways." David noticed a new jar. "Get out." He dipped down for a better look. "You got sugar free lollipops?" His mirth bubbled into laughter. "I couldn't find these, back where I came from. I looked."
Joypad looked quite proud at David's amazement. "They use some kind of seaweed that's sweet, but isn't sugar." She plonked her hoof down on the top of the jar and gave it a twist, revealing the nutritional label. "Zero calories, but all the flavor!"
"Get. Out. Oh, wow, great. Can I?" He reached for the lid of the jar with wriggling fingers.
"For my favorite Evermarsh reject?" She popped open the lid, stuck to her strangely sticky hoof. "Go ahead. Shoot, I'll admit I was guessing. The way you were talking, I thought maybe you wouldn't like sweet things at all."
"No problem with sweet." He dug out a blue one and ripped the cover off before it vanished into his mouth. "Mmm, a touch of sour. I like it. Sour blueberry. This is a real treat."
Joypad brought her hooves together silently. "So sugar's fine, calories bad, got it. I'm figuring you out, Dave."
"Oh no," he cried in mock horror. "Someone that just cares about me." To her surprise, his hand came down on her shoulder. "Seriously, thank you. It's pretty rare someone thinks about what I might want and just... does it. I appreciate it, a lot."
The two met eyes a brief moment before the next customer appeared and her attention went to them. Business paused for no ponies.
"Sir!" a little voice squeaked. Looking down, David could see a familiar little colt. He had a name! He had been told that name at least once. A pity it was lost forever... "Sir," they repeated, performing a strange gesture, a hoof applied directly to the center of their own forehead as the other hoof went to the center of his belly.
The gesture David knew! He repeated it back, hand on his head and the other on his belly. "I recognize and welcome you."
The colt began to cheer, bouncing on all fours. "I knew it! Do you remember me?" He pointed at himself eagerly. "I'm Pipster, and I love your games!"
"They aren't my games exactly," defended Dave, hands up. "But they are good games, eh?"
"Super!" Pipster bounced from front to back hooves and back again. "Is there gonna be a new one?!"
"Hmm... Only the weave can be certain." It was a phrase humans in Evermarsh used a lot.
"Oooo...." Pipster was eating it all up. "Show me a little magic." He reared up, holding hooves close. "I can keep a secret! It's not that big a deal. Unicorns can do magic too!"
An idea came to David. He plucked a pen sitting on the counter behind him and held it up before Pipster. "See this? It's solid, rigid. Go ahead, inspect it."
Pipster took it in a hoof, turning it left and right as it remained stuck. "Yep, just a pen." He offered it back.
David pulled it free with a faint pop. "And yet." He began to wobble the pen up and down, holding it just at the center point so. Light did its trick, making the pen look like it was more made of rubber than a straight thing as it bent at impossible angles in the shaking. Would it work on a pony? David had no idea, but he was ready to try.
Pipster's wide eyes as he followed the pen was answer enough that the optical illusion worked just fine on pony eyes. "Wow!" Ponies did not have little fingers to clutch a pen the way David was, making the trick less popular, which also meant it was more effective. "How..." He suddenly grabbed the pen.
But the pen was solid. It wasn't rubbery. This only made the event more magic. "Whaaaaaaaa..... Whaaaaa!" His eyes only grew wider by the moment. "Whaaaaa? Ohhhhhh yeah!" He pumped the hoof with the pen attached. "Real human magic! Thank you so much!" He stuffed the pen away as if it were the magic artifact involved. "You are the best! When the next game comes out, I'll get it for sure."
"As the weave would want it," half-laughed out David. "So long as you have fun with it."
"Always!" And off he dashed, scampering out of the shop in quite the hurry.
"What... did you do?" There was Joypad, behind her counter. "It's not often I see Pipster that excited about anything but new game release day." She leaned forward onto an elbow. "And it ain't that, so spill it."
"Just a little human magic." David shrugged, though he couldn't help from keeping the smile on his face. The joy he had brought to the foal, well, it felt nice in kind. "Harmless, I promise."
"I'll be the judge of that in my shop." She sat up, crossing her arms. "Show it."
So it was that David took up a fresh pen and got to waggling it until it flowed and wobbled as if it were made of soft rubber in the motions. "Behold it!"
"Huh..." She leaned in, squinting. "That is... not bad. But don't break my pens." She pointed to the cup they were supposed to live in.
David dropped the pen right back in, where it landed with a tink, whole and unrubberized. "There you go."
She reached to inspect the pen herself, but could find no hints of its temporary rubbery nature. "Huh... human magic?"
Joypad slapped down a thick paper during breakfast. "Ya done it. Hope you're happy."
David could see without touching, but he touched anyway for a better look at that cover. There was a picture of him, crouching down a smile.
"EXOTIC CREATURE COMES IN PEACE," read the headline.
"Huh." David was soon reading the article. "It doesn't come off as a sensational thing." It was mostly a fact-filled rundown of what David had been proven to be. Where he worked, his friendly nature around ponies, and that he was not a threat to them. The important stuff. "I feel like I've been officially noted as 'not a problem.'"
Joypad reached out, forcing to the next page over with a flip. "You also caught the attention of Pegasoft."
Pegasoft? "Oh! The ones that make Evermarsh?"
"Who else?!" Joypad threw her hooves wide. "You're a walking mascot, and IP violation. Of course they were gonna take notice. Dummy." She tapped at the paper from her side. "They want you to swing by, all the way over with the pegasi!"
"That's a fair bit away." At least the movie had given that impression. "Don't suppose there's a nice smooth road to it these days?"
"As if." Joypad rolled her eyes with a grump. "And if you don't go to them, good chance they'll come for you, and probably not be happy about it. It's their game you're ripping off."
"Hey, that's not even kinda fair. I can't stop being what I am." David shrugged in defiance. "Still, don't have anything against visiting a video game company." That wasn't a thing he'd ever had the chance to do... "If I can make it to..."
"Zephyr Heights," provided Joypad, peering at him with narrowed eyes. "I bought the computers from there, remember? They love their gadgets. They love the Internet. They couldn't stop laughing at the idea of earth ponies wanting to try it."
"You proved them wrong there." The cafe was doing quite well for itself so far David could see. "So did you ever visit?"
"Eh... no? They came to me. They delivered the stuff here." She crossed her arms. "Don't get me wrong. I hear that place is something else. But I... never did."
"Come with me?" David offered a hand. "I'm a good excuse."
She swatted his hand away. "Too good of one. I have a job. What will these ponies do if I close up to go trekking across the countryside? What would Pip say if he couldn't play his games for who knows how long?"
David considered that, and the idea came quickly enough. "If you tell him you're visiting Pegasoft with me, pretty sure he'd squeal half to death in excitement and demand you come back with souvenirs."
Joypad applied a hoof across one eye. "Ugh, you're not wrong and I hate it. I thought old people didn't like traveling!"
"I'm not that old, sheesh." David shrugged lightly. "Just not young. And not so old I'm against the idea of visiting Pegasoft. But I wouldn't want to try that trip alone."
"Ah ha." Joypad pointed accusingly as she stood up. "You're inviting me to have somepony to lean against."
"Yes." There was a lack of tact of subtlety there. "Also because I know you and that sounds like a long and lonely trip otherwise. Together we can waste time pretty well on the way."
She grumbled, and the topic was dropped in favor of finishing breakfast.
During the work day, Joypad brought up the idea, as a theory, with some customers.
"What?! To Pegasoft?!" One stallion looked quite excited. "Maybe they'll put him in the next Evermarsh."
A mare clapped her hooves. "Will they include the store? That'd be so cool!"
Another pony scoffed at the idea. "This story doesn't fit the time era of the game. It'd be way out of place."
Yet a different mare was quick to jump in, "But they could use the name, and put Joypad in there. It'd be funny, seeing her dressed up all fancy and medieval." The chatter only grew louder, but excited.
Joypad pressed a button that played a loud laser noise. That silenced the room. "You realize, if we go off, this place closes until we get back."
Pony looked to pony, quiet for a moment.
"I'll help." Pip trotted up to the stand and slapped down a single lonely bit. "For your trip." It was a small thing, not worth much, but it inspired others. Though Joypad hadn't asked for it, many other bits came to join the first in a growing pile of care from the community. They were cheering and wishing Joypad a grand adventure.
Her plan to get the idea shot down had failed entirely. "You guys..." She took a slow breath. "Alright! Alright... I'll try to get everything that isn't nailed down." She pointed to a mostly bare wall. "We'll make that the Pegasoft wall with all the goodies we manage to get." The cheer was immediate and loud.
"Eesh." David was there, watching them go nuts. But then they were on him, eagerly wishing him luck and hoping he'd get into the next Evermarsh. A few even hoped he got to meet specific in-game humans, who most likely did not exist.
Pipster was there, reared up on his hinds and performing the gesture of greetings, one hoof to his head, the other to his belly. "They will see you."
"And recognize me," laughed out David, repeating the gesture back at the colt. "Thank you, all of you. This is really something else. What a... community, that's the word for it. I'll do my best to return the favor."
Pipster fell to all four hooves with a clop against the tiles. "Just tell us what happens! We wanna hear all about it when you get back." The general crowd seemed in agreement with that idea, calling encouragements from being Pipster. "And if you happen to get a preview of the next... I'll keep it quiet." Oh, the wink he gave.
David reached for Pipster, who didn't resist getting a little headpat. "I'll take whatever they let me have and bring it for you to see. Promise."
"Yay!" He rushed off with jubilant cries and whoops, ready to share the news with any pony willing to hear them.
So it was that Joypad flipped the sign to closed that evening and began jotting up a new sign to add to it. 'Closed on account of trip to Zephyr Heights. Wish us luck with Evermarsh.' "I cannot believe they're all for it." She turned to David with a little frown. "Did you put them up to it? There's usually at least one stand out that plays the other side."
"Don't look at me." He held up his hands. "The only one I remember the name of is Pip. Good kid. Let's get him something special."
Joypad smiled a little at that. "Yeah... So, about the trip. There isn't a nice smooth road. We're hiking, climbing, and hiking some more. You won't collapse on me, will you?"
"Humans are great at hiking," proudly declared David. "And I'm not awful at it. I hate being the one slowing things down anyway. I'll wait a week for you to give up before I say a word."
"That's a bad habit." She prodded her human guest. "If it hurts, say something. You're not a foal, or even a young adult." She pointed at herself. "So if you need a breather, just say it, alright?"
"Alright, alright." Even if he mentally filed that under 'probably not.' "We're heading out first thing tomorrow?"
"That's the plan! Since this is your idea, you get to make dinner. Only fair."
"Sure, but you start on Evermarsh. We stopped right at a good part and I can listen while I cook."
"Deal." The two retreated upstairs for food and games. A fine way to see off the city.
The next day they set out, not into the wilderness, oh no. "Are you nuts?" Joypad led the way instead to a camping store. "They gave us money, I'm using it." She marched right up to the counter. "Hey." She nodded at the stallion behind it. "Gonna need a tent big enough for us two." She waved between herself and David. "Blanket for us both, meal stuff, a few weeks of rations, a waterskin..."
The stallion laughed. "Joy, this is the real world, not a fantasy game. Really, a few weeks of rations? A waterskin?" He waved it off. "You sit down and I'll be right back." He pushed off the counter and trotted off briskly.
Joy scowled at the place he had been in. "The names change, but a ration is a ration, no matter what time you're in."
David shrugged at that. "I don't know what the alternative name is. They were still rations sometimes where I came from."
"Right?!" Joypad looked pleased at being vindicated. "Hopefully he knows what we want."
The stallion returned with a cart rolling behind him. "One survival kit for two!" He swung around, bringing the cart closer. "One large sized tent, bedding, food, water jugs, the works!" He clapped his hooves eagerly. "And... maybe the wagon? Unless you want to carry all of this."
David reached over the stallion, easily detaching him from the wagon and giving it a pull. It rolled easily and smoothly. "This is pretty good, but the moment we hit real terrain, it's going to be useless."
Joypad nodded along with that idea. "We're going to Zephyr Heights. Got anything that can handle that?"
The stallion curled a hoof to his chin. "Huh... Well, there's this thing I got in a few weeks ago." He hurried into the back and came out with a bowl, a large bowl, about two feet in diameter, and floating off the ground. "The unicorns made it. Cheap, no, but this'll get over things." He tapped at the floating bowl, about two inches deep. "Just pile in your goodies and let it float behind you. Done deal."
"A floating disc. Cool." David nodded in approval of the item. "If we can afford that, yes."
"That is an important part." Joypad waved a hoof at the stallion. "I only have so many bits. How many will this all set me back, assuming I go with the floating thing and not the wagon?"
He spouted a number, which made Joypad blanche. "Who knew camping was so costly..."
"Too much?" David shrugged, having no frame of refence for the local currency.
"Ugh, no..." She began setting out coins on the counter. "I just thought I'd get to keep more of it before we even started. I swear, David, this better be worth it."
"No pressure." David tapped the disc twice and it began to follow him. Soon he had all the goodies transferred over to it. "We are prepared for our adventure."
"No we're not." Joypad smiled a bit goofily. "But we're doing it anyway. Come on, greymane. Let's get to Zephyr Heights before your soaps come on."
They left the camping store, heading towards the edge of town. "One, I doubt we'd get to there before any daily show came on. Two, I don't watch soaps, I write them."
"Oh right." She looked over at him as she walked along. "You did mention you write. Do you really? What do you write?"
"I just said!" He stuffed his hands in his pants pockets, the disc floating along peacefully. "I write slice of life nonsense with all sorts of trouble for my fictional characters." He frowned then. "Which I... We are going to run into trouble. There's literally no way this will be just a boring hike."
"Don't be like that." She swatted him on the back, lower spine meeting her hoof. "We're not in a story. Most likely it'll just be a few interesting views and that'll be that."
"That'd be nice." But David knew what he was. His god was not a kind one.
Walking. One of the primary parts of getting to distant places when one didn't have a car or other transport was walking, and so much of it. David did his best to walk like he had someplace to be. Walking lazily? Not his style. One two, arms moving in powerful counter step, each foot placed firmly into the next motion. For being sedentary, he was good at walking. "How far away is it, do you know?"
"That way." Joypad pointed the way forward. What they traveled wasn't a road exactly, more of a trail that was stepped on more than what was around it. It could become a road, perhaps, with a little effort. "We keep going until we see it. All I could tell you." She leaned over and grabbed a bottle, attached to her hoof easily. Her other twisted the cap off. Ponies in that world were far more explicit with their selectively sticky hooves. "Hopefully not too far."
And the walking. Over them flew a pegasus, headed back towards Maretime bay. They were too high up, and their eyes too set ahead to notice the human or the earth pony trundling under them. "Well." David shrugged softly. "Means we're headed in the right direction."
"At least that!" Joypad slammed her half-drank bottle back in the floating disc. "I thought you said this was going to be exciting?"
"I was worried it would be, but if it isn't, this is me not complaining."
"What if I complain instead?" Joypad swerved in closer to David's side. "I don't walk this much usually! I'm getting sore in places."
David smiled. He had a kid with him. A teen kid. A young adult kid, but still a kid, compared to him. "What can I do to help without stopping?"
"You were always eager to use those fingers." She directed her nose at one of his hands, swaying as it was. "You any good at them?"
Was she? He reached for her, and she didn't resist that time. He began to rub gently behind an ear. "Oh, that's not bad." Her eyes half-closed as she walked along. "But that isn't what hurts. Further back, where my legs run into my sides."
"Mmhmm." He obediently slowed a moment to get back, rubbing gently at where her foreleg met her body. Her muscles were alien, compared to a human, but he gently felt and rubbed, learning where they were and applying what he hoped was soothing pressure along the way.
"Oh... more, there, yeah..." Her complaints had died. Joypad was enjoying the perks of having a friendly human around. "Right there... It hurts... so good... Is that a human magic, to make something scream in the right pain that it feels good?"
David kept at it, trying to home in on the spots that provoked the right kind of response. Pony muscles were not human ones, not that he was a trained massage therapist for humans. He just went where it felt needed, imagining his 'life force' flowing gently into the pain, soothing it. It was largely his imagination, but those he treated, few they were, seemed to not complain about it.
"Shoot." Joypad nudged against him. "I was avoiding this? What I get trying to be all 'professional'. Whatever, I give permission for this kind of stuff whenever you're up for it."
"Hooray." He had been given permission to serve her whenever he got the urge. What an honor! "Seriously though, feel better?"
"Much." She accelerated forward. "Like you forced the tiredness right out of me, thanks David." She felt at the ground then. "Hm, are we going uphill? Makes sense I guess. Their city is... up. Kind of its defining feature."
"Then up we go," laughed David, plodding onwards with his firm stride. He wouldn't give up, not while Joypad pressed on. His pride prevented admitting defeat first. "We go until sunset?"
"Not that long." She turned an ear back to their floating disc, not that it said much or many noise. "We need a little time to set up the tent and stuff, and I don't want to do that in the dark. Do you?"
"Checks out." Companionable silence settled between them until the sun began to grow heavy. "About now, I figure?"
"Yeah." She veered off the road, looking around. "This... looks flat enough." She began sweeping dirt aside with brushes of her hoof as if to mark the spot. "We'll put the tent here."
David went to grab the tent, but grunted more than got the tent moving. "Something up?" asked Joypad, watching him, judging without a specific word.
He didn't want to admit it, but he was tired, just... "Sorry." He sank down onto a rock. "Not going to be super helpful."
"Gave up finally, huh?" She reared up and grabbed it in her mouth, tossing it onto the spot she had planned. That it unfolded and landed, deployed, was just a little bit of pony magic. "There we go. Greymane, you just relax while I get the fire going." She rustled around in the disc for supplies. "Huh... He didn't include any logs."
David looked around. "There's wood around." He gathered himself back upright. "I'll get some." Despite his moment of weakness, a chance to relax was enough, and he marched off to at least get some wood.
"Don't hurt yourself." She got to assembling rocks in a circle, preparing for the fire to be. She grabbed a pan and set it next to the future fire. "Any luck?"
David unloaded, letting several heavy logs fall with heavy thuds in the ring of stones. "Need some small sticks?"
"Uh... yeah... Yeah do that." She wobbled a hoof a little. "You're supposed to light the little stuff, right? Pretty sure..." A survival expert, she was not. "Yeah..."
David began gathering up small sticks and twigs in a meandering path. Soon the fire pit was filled with those heavy logs and a nice filling of small bits of wood waiting to be set alight. "Alright, all set. We have some matches or a lighter?"
"Right here!" She wipped out something that burst into a stream of flames. It was like she was holding a little dragon, belching flames by her command. "The best bits can afford." She turned the faux-dragon on the wood and it was soon crackling to life. "And now, dinner!" She tossed the lighter aside and slapped the pan down instead, getting right to cooking.
David collected the lighter to place in the disc for the next time they wanted a flame. "That's kinda cute... Are dragons still a thing?"
"Still?" Joypad hiked a brow up at David. "They're made up."
"Like humans?" he joked with a smirk.
"Yeah! Like... oh..."Joypad crashed to her haunches. "Guess... Huh... If we see a dragon, be nice! I don't want to be cooked."
"Deal." Neither of them had any strong desire to experience a dragon's flame from the wrong end. "What are you making?"
"Whatever this is." She grabbed a packet and tore it open, hooves moving in opposite directions to let it splash into the pan, sizzling on contact. "Mmm, smells nice!"
"No argument there." He couldn't quite place what he was smelling, but it struck a good note. Beans? Some kind of veggie... A mix, and she was stirring it up and cooking it with a spoon attached to her hoof like it was no big deal. It was a bit nifty, and uncanny. "Want me to mind it?"
"Hm? I got it." Joypad waved away with her free hoof. "You just relax those tired bones and wait for dinner." The fire cracked with a pop under the pan, lending its heat to the process. "Oh, want to grab a drink? I got a six pack of something that wasn't water, just for after the walks."
"A day ending treat?" David hopped up and peeked in the disc, shuffling things around until something that looked like a six pack of soda came into view. "Here, I think." He plucked them out and waved it at her gently.
"That it. Bring two over here. One's for you." He popped two free just as she instructed, surrendering one to her to sip from and sitting himself back down. "And served!" She grabbed two plates and filled each with half of what was for dinner. "Eat before it gets cold. No microwaves out here for second tries."
A microwave that worked in the middle of nowhere? David could imagine a pony having exactly that kind of thing, but Joypad was not such a pony, as she had warned. He accepted his plate with a nod. "Itadakimasu," he said, clapping his hands together gently once.
"What?"
"Thank you for the food." David got to eating, making short work of it despite any delay caused by the little prayer. "Mmm, not bad at all, like it." Was that lentil? He was fairly sure lentils were involved. Good, he liked those, and most other foods out there. "Thank you, for coming with me."
"As if I'd let my human just wander off and get eaten by a random... Aw." She was distracted by a sudden little round rabbit peering at her. "Aren't you a cute thing?" The rabbit fled, as rabbits are known to do. "Aw..." The same word, but a very different emotion. "Guess I'm not that good with animals." She looked up to see David was already doing things. "What?"
"Cleaning up." He was doing his best to get things straightened to use again the next day. "Least I can do since you took care of the food."
"Oh. Thanks!" She rose to all fours, stretching lazily. "Now, rest time." And off she cantered into the tent, vanishing beyond the flap. "Cozy, but it works." A light clicked on inside the tent, her shadow visible as she got comfortable in there.
A space he'd need to be. David set the things back in the disc. "Does this thing have... a top or something? What watches it while we sleep?"
"Hm?" She poked back out of the tent, peering at David and the disc. "Huh... Good call. I think there's a tarp in that mess. See if you can't cover it."
Which is what he did, pulling out the tarp and using it to seal up the disc as best he could. "There we go. That'll at least discourage things from poking their snouts in here without permission." It was the best he had, so he abandoned worrying about it to climb in the tent with Joypad. "Goodnight."
"I only have one blanket," admitted Joypad. "I think the shopkeep there thought we were way closer than we are." She waggled the blanket she was wrapped in, clearly big for one person, but would require two people to be comfortable to make use of it at once.
"Lay it down instead." David made a smoothing gesture. "A soft warm thing to lay on will get us through the night."
"Hm." She only hesitantly stepped free of the blanket. "I feel bad just having you with nothing."
With the blanket given up, David got right to smoothing it out into a carpet of sorts for the bottom of the tent. There would be nothing on top of them, but at least they had a soft thing to be on top of. "It'll do for now, I think."
She sank down on it, curled. "Barely. If we survive the trip to Zephyr Heights, we're getting a second one for the way back."
About that... "Think the pegasi got something for travel back? They got the computers to you. They didn't hike, did they?"
"I didn't ask," admitted Joypad without hesitation. "By the way, you were wrong."
"I was? Not new, but what was I wrong about." He flopped out on his back, eyes closed and breathing slowing in an attempt to lure himself to sleep. "How?"
"Nothing horrible so far. I told you. Worrywart." She poked him, but quiet was allowed to reign after that. It was sleep time.
"No! No no no." David woke up to worried sounds. "C'mon!" He pushed open the flap, staggering out to see what the trouble was, but it was fairly obvious. The tarp over the disc has done little to stop whatever decided it was worth raiding. The tarp was torn free. The contents, scattered about. Anything edible was devoured. The water and drinks remains, not interesting enough to whatever it had been, but the food was gone, all gone, and some other things had been smashed on the way, an accident really, but destroyed all the same.
"Crap," was David's eloquent response to the event. He got right to picking things up, tossing them back in the disc. "We have two choices."
"Why?" Joypad peered at him suspiciously. "You're way too calm about this!"
"They said that about my last adventure." He tossed the tarp aside, thoroughly ruined. "You can pack the tent?"
"Yeah? Guess." She grabbed the tent, easily folding it up just as smoothly as she had set it up. "But, seriously, I though you were a shut-in geek, like... me... and here you are acting like nothing big happened."
"I'm not panicking." David looked around for any abandoned bits, but everyone salvageable appeared to be tucked away. "Even if I did, we still have two choices. One--" He put out a finger. "We keep going and make do with what we have. Two--" Out came another finger. "We go back. We should be able to make that, in theory, though people will be upset. I'd be a bit upset, but dying sucks more than not, so... completely valid as options go."
"I don't like dying." Joypad crossed her arms with a pout. "Top ten things I don't like. So, is this when you reveal you have awesome human magic to feed us?"
He lifted his left arm, pointing to the band in view. "I can keep track of the steps I took."
"Yay." There was no excitement in her voice. "Alright, and then?"
He tapped the disc, getting it moving. "And then we either forage for food, or we head back. Still two choices."
She put her hooves on either side of her head. "We can't go back! They gave up so many bits to get us there... If we just told them we gave up..." She began to walk alongside David, her head hanging low. "Did you put points in the survival skill? Tell me you put at least a few in there."
"Technically, yeah, at least one point." David walked with that purposeful stride he tended to use. "I earned a merit badge for surviving. Let's see how well it works. Now... what can ponies eat? I know what humans eat."
"If it's a plant, I'll try it once, but try not to shove anything poisonous in there." She rolled her eyes as she walked along. "And that isn't always obvious."
"It never is." Would that plants could just tell you if they were good to eat or not. "Alright, so finding things for you should be a lot easier. Humans don't digest plants nearly so well, so we have to be way pickier." He hiked a thumb under his teeth as if to demonstrate. "We are all arounders. Meat, land or sea, always a hit. Fruits? Sure, but once you get to leaves..."
"Depends on the leaf." She shrugged, clearly willing to try a leaf out, which was more than most humans would tolerate. "Well... shoot, now I'm the one that was wrong."
"Hm?"
"Something exciting happened," she allowed with a suffering sigh. "And I wish it hadn't." She turned an ear on her human companion. "You have a plan for this?"
"Not especially." Not that this stopped him from marching onwards. "Worrying about it won't get us there any faster, or feed us.
"This is why young people get annoyed at older people." She hopped up on a log, trotting along it a few steps before she bounded back down. "Always sounding all wise and stuff, even when you don't have any answers. Why are you tracking that anyway?"
"Tracking what?" David didn't step up on the log, instead walking alongside it for its length as they slowly ascended up the slope. "Oh, steps?"
"That."
"It's silly, looking back at it." He curled his arm to bring the band into view. "It's not like I had a specific goal, but I liked knowing. It tracks sleep and things too."
"What doesn't it track? And I never saw you look at it, even once." She shook her head. "You sure it's not just a funny watch?"
Actually... David tapped at it, waking it up. "It is one of those too, and it's doing that just fine." Interdimensional time zones be damned! "It's tracking the steps for the day, but I can't check much more than that without my phone... which I didn't bring with me."
"Oh, one of those portable phones with a thousand buttons?" Joypad came in closer, though her eyes were on the path ahead. "Pegasi love those things. Bet you could get one there, make your doodonger happy."
What were the odds that a pegasus cell phone would be compatible with a human device? Did they use Bluetooth? Would they have the app that his device used, or something compatible with it? Part of him wanted to dismiss it as impossible, but he couldn't. Equestria was a magical world of impossibilities. It could happen. He put the odds closer to 50% than 0%. "Maybe."
They day passed them by, trudging ever upwards against the incline. They still had things to drink, thankfully. "Dinner's gonna be slim," warned Joypad as she set up the tent. with a sharp snap, setting it down. "Let's see your survival skills."
"Right..." Crud, it was time to put up or shut up. He got to wandering, looking for edibles. Berries! He saw a bush with some and gently picked one free. It was large, like a cherry. He tried to decide which were the most ripe. The ones that looked the most like a tasty fruit... right? The pale ones that seemed to err on the smaller size? No, not those. He took a nip. Sweet! Sweet and good. Hm... He began plucking others of the sameish size and color to bring back to camp.
"That didn't take long." Joypad sat up as he came closer. "What're you balancing there?"
He was holding his bonanza in his hands as best he can, using them as a basket of sorts as he dropped to a knee and let them fall out into the pan she had set up to cook with. "Nice!" She grabbed one of the berry cherry things and sniffed at it. "Doesn't smell like death." and into her mouth it went with a nice loud gulp. "Mmm, tasty." She spat up the pit despite having already swallowed. "Eat up! You're the one that found them. Or did you already eat?"
"Not yet," he assured, sinking down to sit with her and share the bounty of berries. "Do you recognize these?" He could hope.
"Uh, no? You do, right?" She paused mid-chomp. "That's why you picked them, right?"
Well... "They look similar to what I'd see, a world away."
She applied a hoof to her face. "Points for honesty. If we die, I'm going to haunt you, for, like, ever. Just so we're clear. Death vow and all that. No backsies!"
So it was that David ate under the looming threat that he may or may not be haunted forever in whatever afterlife was waiting for him. At least he went to bed without feeling like he was starving. That was a plus!
The next day, walking. Walking was such an important part of traveling, but never really brought up all that much. There was also gas. "Whatever that food was," grumbled Joypad. "It filled me in more ways than one." The effect was to ponies only, it seemed, as David marched on without difficulties.
Joypad, on the other hoof, was far more musical that day, except the instrument was on the wrong end of her, to her dissatisfaction. "I'm not dying," she reminded as if to console herself. "But I may make you wish you were." Still, it didn't really slow her down, just made her stink, and complain about the fact. "And why aren't you involved?!"
"Do you want me to join you that way?" David shrugged softly, walking onwards despite the troubles. "At least this morning had no surprises."
"We had nothing left for us to take. Look, when you go foraging, get not those, alright? I'm starting to wonder if I'd have..." She paused to let up the pressure building in her. "--preferred if you found something that just killed me and got it over with."
"I'd be very sad if you got hurt." He set a hand on her and she didn't dance away. "I'll try to find something that'll agree with you tonight, best as I can."
"You have no idea what you're doing," she scoffed. "But thanks, for the try. We're just two nerds in the forest. Why aren't we already dead?" She broke out into a little almost hysterical laughter, but they were proceeding despite it all, ascending the mountain that was at least half again as long as any mountain had a good reason to be.
Despite her words, he set out anew that evening to try to find something to keep their bellies from crying too long or hard about the situation. Those cherries were apparently common in the region, as he saw more of them. He pocketed some of them. They hadn't posed a problem to him, so... at least that was half the foraging done, hirrah! But he had a pony counting on him to find something.
Movement. He darted his head to see the back end of a rabbit leaping into a bush. "Hello bunny." He had gained some sympathy for rabbits, having adopted and cared for one. "Where are you headed?" He crouched down for a better look to see the rabbit digging at something, but it fled on noticing him there.
"Hm." He reached in and brushed the spot, revealing a great big root veggie. A carrot, or something like it? Maybe a potato? It wasn't an earth root veggie, but it was large, and the rabbit clearly thought it was good, so... He came back with it. "I suggest cooking this before biting it." If it was like a potato, eating it raw could pose problems.
"Already got the fire going." She was clapping as the big root thing was set down. "That looks like it could turn into something." She pulled out a big knife and got to slicing it up into wedges. "Gonna fry it up. Whatever looted us didn't know the oil was good stuff." And so in it went, sizzling soon, and appealing scents came after. It was like a sweet potato of sorts, with a dash of corn, all fried up thanks to Joypad's cooking. "Now this looks... good. Where'd you find it?"
"Would you believe a kind rabbit led me to it?" Her expression was enough to communicate that she did not believe it for a moment. "Either way, found it, enjoy it." He popped a cherry into his own mouth, chewing placidly. It was safe for humans, so far he could tell. "If you don't mind, I'd like a taste."
"Sure, you found it." She soon has it served on two plates, the same two she had used the first night. "Here's to not waking up with near explosive gas."
As it turned out, that veggie was quite good. The mild spices Joypad had sprinkled over it had worked well with it, providing a simple vegetarian meal that went well with the celebratory drink for the end of the day. "Last of them," noted Joypad. "I planned this out, uh, the shopkeep did... We should be getting close."
"About that..." David was looking at something ahead in the gloom.
Who could sleep with the lights of Zephyr Heights beaming down upon them. They were not in the city, not by far, but they were close enough that, with the natural light fading, the city's bright signs and spotlights made it increasingly obvious as time went by. They had found their target. Joypad began to cheer wildly, clopping her hooves with only a pause to snap up another bit of the tubery dinner. "Mmm, that is pretty good, just saying."
David enjoyed a fried slice himself. It was like a nice fat french fry, in texture, but the flavor was a bit off. It was an alien spud, but just as filling and delightful, he decided. It probably also had tons of carbs, but he was busy working those off with the hiking they'd been doing. "Alright, with the target in sight, I feel confident saying we succeeded. We should get there within the day, then we can just buy food."
"Like a civilized pony," almost-screamed Joypad, so excited for the option. "Forget sleeping." She reached for the tent. "Let's just keep walking and get away from 'the grand outdoors' if you don't mind."
"Tempting." David was not rising as quickly as Joypad already was. "But it's been a long day and we're not there yet. The city looks a bit away."
"It looks close enough to reach." Joypad casually folded up the tend with the ease only a pony had, stuffing it back in the disc. "Besides, if we're lucky, we'll run into a ride on the way. Pegasi are big on that kinda thing."
"Are they?" He pushed to his feet, dusting off. "Alright, we can try. You look ready to go." And that felt like an understatement. "Lead on."
She casually tossed what was left of the tubers, to David's silent grump. What a waste of food... But they were all cleaned up and everything was put away, so the hiking could resume. Despite their distance, the light only grew brighter and brighter.
"Stop right there!" A collection of pegasi guards touched down just in front of Joypad and David. "Identify yourself, and... that." He pointed to David, eyes on Joypad. "There are laws about bringing strange creatures into Zephyr Heights."
Joypad was quick to sit and raise her hooves in a wild wave. "Hey! Actually, super glad to see you. We're exhausted after a miserable trip here. I'm Joypad." She pointed a hoof to David. "That's David. We're headed to Pegasoft."
One of the other guards stepped forward, eyes on David intently a moment before it seemed to click. "Do it! Do it!" He began to dance in place, grinning like a bit of a foal.
David put a hand on his belly and head. "I recognize and welcome you."
The stallion squealed with utter joy, quickly returning the gesture. The captain or leader of them hiked a brow at the behavior. "You... know what that is then?"
"It's a human! From Evermarsh."
"Evermarsh!" blurted another guard. "Oh yeah! Wow!" There were two guards closing in on David, peering at him curiously.
The leader applied a hoof to his face. "Alright... Now, we don't give ride--"
"--I will!" The other guard casually stepped under David, lifting him up, the wrong way. David was facing the stallion's tail as the pony turned around, spreading his wings. "Get you in town in a second." And suddenly he was flying. It was amazing, and terrifying. David was flying the wrong way, with no seatbelt or anything to grab but the pony himself, which David did, grabbing a handful of furry flesh with each hand as the wind whistled through his ears.
The captain sighed softly. "Well... Look, you need to be with him, even if he is harmless. With me!" Another pony closed in, trapping Joypad between them. They both lifted into the air, carrying her between them as she squeaked and wriggled, but she flew about as well as David did, carried into the glittering city of lights and sounds. They had arrived at Zephyr Heights.
David landed with a strained laugh, half-sliding off the pony back to the ground. "Thanks for the lift." That was what it had been, literally. "So, Evermarsh fan?"
"Actually no." The guard inclined his head. "But my niece is, and she will flip her lid when I tell her about it. Can't wait for that. Good luck." And off her flew, leaving David behind. It wasn't but a moment later that the leader and another guard touched down, allowing a rattled Joypad to touch the ground between them.
She took a step forward, heaving. "You look about as comfortable as I do." She turned back to the guards. "Warn a mare before you do that! Not all of us are used to flying around like that."
The leader nodded to the both of them. "Welcome to Zephyr Heights." The complaint, ignored. "You can get a map on your ph..." He flipped an ear back. "Neither of you have a phone, do you?"
David patted his pocket, where a cellphone was not. "About a world away, sorry."
"I have one in my shop?" Joypad pointed the way back towards Maretime bay. "Why?"
The leader grunted, more at Joypad's reaction than the strange human's. "Go there." He pointed to a store that had a sign of a pony talking into a cellphone, looking quite happy about it. "Tell them you're a visitor to the city and they will set you straight. Have a good day." He spread his wings with a loud flip.
"Wait!" Joypad reached to grab him, but he was already gone, taking off to whatever else guards did. "Shoot... What's he even talking about?!"
"I have this." He patted her once on the back as he went past her towards the phone store. "I used to work at a place just like this."
"You did?!" Joypad quickly caught up, matching David's pace. "You find me food and you figure this out? Way to earn your keep, alien thing."
"You can't blame me for the whole trip." He grabbed the handle of the door firmly, even if part of him wondered why a pony would ever invent that, though their sticky hooves allowed use easily enough. "You were the one that got the supplies, which we still used."
"Some of," she grumped, walking in past him through the open door. "Woah." It was a wonderland of technology on display, with flashing lights and animated displays competing for her attention. "You're up!"
David strolled in like he owned the place. The layout wasn't odd at all. He could see the counter where the bored cashiers were. He could see where the pricey phones and tables were, just a little seperate from the rest. He could even make out what the carriers were. "Alright..." Even on another world, that kind of shop was built along the same basic lines. He went right up to the counter. "Hello."
A pegasus mare behind the counter smiled up at him. "Woah, nice cosplay."
Cosplay? David decided not to argue that. "We're visiting." He waved back at Joypad. "And we were told you could hook us up?"
"Oh!" She ducked down under the counter and came up with two boxes, slapping them on the counter. "Every visitor gets one basic phone free. No replacements, so don't lose it. They also don't like water, so avoid that." She was busy opening the boxes and extracting the phones, getting them turned on. "Ever use a phone before?" Her eyes were on Joypad. "A lot of not-pegasi are kinda clueless, no offense or anything."
David wriggled his finger, watching the phone power on, the one he had claimed by looking at it. "Let me have a moment with it. I'll probably figure it out."
"Sure." She did not sound convinced, but she surrendered a phone towards David, the wrong one.
The disappointment faded quickly. They were both the same until he did things with it anyway. He began to tap and swipe. It was like an Apple phone, in the end, he decided as he navigated around. He pulled up the app store and did a search. There, Zephyr Height Map. He got that download... Oh. It needed an account, of course. He got to signing up for... email. He had no email, not in that world. Back at home, he had infinite emails! But he wasn't back in the human world. He had no email, shoot... "What do you suggest for a free good site to get an email at?"
"Well..." The salesmare had a hoof to her chin.
The stallion next to her nudged her. "Everyone uses ZepMail. Zepmail.wing."
"Zepmail dot wing." David typed it in quickly, pulling up the email provider. "Let's get an account!" And he got to typing quickly. Ponies, thankfully, didn't really have a lot in the way of identifying anything. It didn't ask for him to prove who he was, just taking it at face value, which was fine, as David had nothing to prove who he was. Soon, he had an email all of his own, which let him make an account with the operating system of the phone, which let him download the map! "Computers are like that. You have to do A to do B to do C when all you wanted was D."
Joypad inclined her head, watching her human hammer away at it. "Huh, so you really do know how that thing works? I figured it was a pegasus only thing and if you weren't one of those, you were out of luck."
"I've seen a pegasus use it with a hoof." Or a human with a finger, clearly. "So here we are." He showed the map, with a You Are Here shown. "And Pegasoft is... here." Another arrow appeared. "So we have to go that way."
"Gimmie mine." Joypad grabbed up her phone and poked at it a bit helplessly. "How do you... make it do all that neat stuff?"
David snapped his fingers. "You can skip a part. You have a Pegasoft account."
"I do," she agreed with an uncertain tone. "How does that help?"
"Watch." He reached over and tapped the start button. Instead of entering an email, which she did not have, he clicked the alternative login and the big Pegasoft icon. "There, log in like you were playing Evermarsh."
Joypad quickly did just that and the phone chimed joyfully, becoming her phone officially. "Oh, great!" She began playing eagerly, tapping at it. Even if phones were new to her, she liked devices and gadgets, and she was diving headfirst into it. "Ooo, where'd you, Oh!" She had found the app store. There was no saving her.
David tapped her shoulder to distract her. "Thanks for the phones." They both nodded at the salesmare and collected their boxes. "Let's head to Pegasoft."
"It's kinda late in the day." Joypad trotted quickly to the window to peer out at the dimming lights. "I vote we get a place to stay instead."
"I'm alright with that." He found a new button that prompted him with a bobbing ball. "Nearest hotel?" The phone chimed and showed him a result. "Perfect." Two more clicks and he was back in the map program, being led in another direction. "We got a hotel. Assuming you still have bits?" Joypad held up a bag of jingling coins. "Then we are set." They met, hand to hoof in a high five and headed through the noisy city to the place of respite.
The hotel wasn't big or glamorous. A little hole in the wall, really, but a friendly portly pegasus mare was happy to see them. "Oh, hello there! Two rooms or one?" She held up two hooves and jiggled them up and down from one another.
Joypad pointed at the right hoof. "Just one room. He's well trained."
The mare giggled at the implication. "Good on him. Is he here to visit Pegasoft? Are both of you?"
The sight of a human made a lot of people think of the company, apparently.
"We practically have this place to ourselves." Rather than going straight to their room, Joypad was wandering down the hall towards what looked to be a common area. "So small. I didn't think they'd have any places like this in the heights."
“Alphabittle is such a cheap-skate!” A gruff male voice proclaimed from around the corner. “This place is tiny!” To the surprise of both human and earth pony the voice was preceded by a lithe young unicorn mare with gray fur, a deep blue mane and tale, and a bright pink horn, dressed in a red scarf and barrett, with a dirty earth pony ragdoll sitting on her head propped up on her horn as she entered the common area with a vaguely bored expression.
David casually inclined his head at the other pony. "We're not alone. Thought we would be at first. What are we looking for?"
"I don't know… to be honest. This is a new place. May as well be a whole new world!" Joypad had her energy restored, looking around curiously. "Oh, cute doll." She wandered right up to it. "Look at you, keeping watch over your mare." And it clicked. "Who is a unicorn!"
“Gloomy Sonnet,” the mare replied in a listless feminine voice. Her eyes rolled upward to the doll sitting on her head. “And that’s Charlie. Huh? Is that a human, like in Evermarsh?” Her voice had all the surprise and curiosity of somepony noticing ranch dressing at the salad bar.
David laughed despite that. "Even unicorns know Evermarsh? Pegasoft really gets around with their games." It was perhaps odd that he, a complete outsider, was less surprised at a unicorn than another pony.
Joypad pointed at herself. "Joypad! Wow, never met a unicorn. Um, sorry." She turned the pointing hoof on David. "That's David, and he's a human. We're here to visit Pegasoft actually. They wanted to put eyes on him."
“Heh, small world, ain’t it,” the gruff male voice returned, seemingly coming from the young mare’s head, though her lips weren’t moving. “We’re here to meet with Pegasoft too. They want our boss to start running their game machines at his tea house. Gets us a couple of days on the road, change of scenery on the boss’s bit. You know how it is.”
David raised a brow only a moment. "Well, they're the ones that'd have that. Joy, did you get your computers from them?"
"Nah." She waved the idea away. "Another setup, just came by offering them, and I couldn't say no, skip a few steps and here we are." As if buying computers at all logically led to her current situation. "We're both fish out of water, aren't we?" She waved a hoof between herself and Gloomy. "I mean, not-pegasi in pegasi-town, away from home."
“Electronics are not so much a thing in bridlewood.” Gloomy nodded absently. “Mr. Bittle debated to even take the machines, but Charlie was very insistent.”
“Trust me, Gloomy,” the male voice broke in, as the mares lips stilled, “Pinball and pichinko are great, but you have not lived until you played a real assed vidja game!”
That voice… It was becoming impossible to ignore. "You sound… like a friend of mine." But who is you? "Uh, the guy voice? Is that you?" He was looking at the unicorn, from whom all the voices flowed. "Sorry, probably sounds a bit odd."
“Oh.. yeah…” The doll waved. It’s button eyes and stitch smile as constant as ever. “Sorry. Everypony in bridle wood is pretty used to me. I forget I need to flail like a muppet when I talk to strangers.”
The doll put a velvetine hoof to it’s chin. “You look familiar… and you're a human, so definitely maybe? Sorry, it’s been a LONG time since I got here…”
"Huh?" His eyes went to the doll perched on the unicorn. "So… Huh… The unicorn and the doll are separate, but the voice comes out of one place."
"Seems so," echoed Joypad. "Sorry, we're not trying to be rude. Funny coincidence though, that we're headed to the same place!" She pointed to where she thought Pegasoft was, even if it was likely entirely the wrong direction. "Oh! You get a phone yet? Did you… get two?"
“We are separate and individual entities since the return of magic.” The unicorn explained as if it were a casual domestic issue, addressing David. “For the twenty years prior to that point Charlie’s visual, auditory, and mobile capacity relied on contact with me. He still prefers to ride on my head, but his voice comes from his own body. The confusion is understandable, seeing as he likes to ride on my head.”
“Yeah I passed on the phone” Ragdoll Charlie waggled his head to let those present know he was speaking. “Ever try to text and play Twister at the same time? That goes on the nope train.”
Joypad inclined her head. "Is that a unicorn game?" But it hit her. "Ha, wow… We're both mares with odd 'pets'." She waved between Gloomy and herself. "Yours is a little doll that sounds like he's an older guy, and mine is a strange alien from a videogame." She leaned against David with a giggle. "Couldn't really say which of us won for strange points."
“You don’t understand at all! He’s not a pet, and he’s not a doll!” Gloomy snapped, then caught herself. “I’m sorry Miss Joypad. That was out of line. I found Charlie when I was very young. Bridlewood is very… well Bridlewood. Unicorns are all crazy backwoods bumkins, don’t you know. And I stuck out. I liked to poke around the old places looking for things…”
"Oh, sorry…" Joypad rubbed behind her neck, looking appropriately shamed. "Sorry, I got used to having an odd pet being a… good thing."
"You can stop calling me a pet." David did not sound that upset at the title. "So did you have a safer trip here than we did? We almost Oregon Trailed an ending before we even got here."
“Have you ever seen a critter panic like when a scare-crow actually screams at it?” Charlie somehow managed to waggle his head in a smirk.
Joypad extended her tongue at that. "Mine can't do that. He just sleeps like a log. Critters took most of our stuff…" A sudden thought. "Shoot, we have to resupply, but we can do that after Pegasoft. When are you two headed there?"
“I’m guessin’ sometime tomorrow.” The ragdoll contemplated. “Soon as they figure out we’re in town. So just before or after you.”
“That seems likely.” Gloomy nodded smartly, throwing Charlie off as he grabbed at her horn with a hoof stitched hoof.
David shrugged at that. "Huh, guess we're on a similar schedule. We're headed over there after we get sleep on an actual bed."
"Actual bed," sighed out Joypad as if it were a fond memory she had forgotten. "That is sounding way more appealing than it… Oh wow, they probably have a shower too! Or a bath?" Her mind was quite a bit away from the conversation.
“And yes you are getting a bath tonight!” Gloomy cast her head slightly upwards to make it clear who she was talking to.
“So, yeah… nice to meet you…” The doll seemed to waggle a hoof in David's direction, “Meet up tomorrow and compare notes? Meh?” Already Gloomy was walking presumably in the direction of their room. Ragdoll pleaded, “Just don't set me on the radiator to dry! You know that’s uncomfortable!”
David tapped at his equine friend. "Turning in sounds like a good idea." And off they went to find their room, with a full day ahead of them. "That voice though…" It was hard to place a random voice coming from a magical doll, but he was sure he knew it, from somewhere? He was perfectly happy to just crash into the provided bed, but after Joypay had her shower, she came out and got to prodding him. "What?"
"Your turn." She pointed back at the shower.
"Tired." Basically asleep was a more accurate measurement of things.
"And stinky." Joypad grabbed his shoulder in her mouth and dragged him right out of bed with a squawk from him, though that woke him up. "Go clean up, then sleep."
-=-=-=-=-
“He’s a text” The doll noted as the unicorn mare worked the lather into his fluff with her hooves. “He knows who I used to be.”
“He knows more about you than I do then?” Gloomy stated as if she was referring to an errant cloud in the sky..
“Don’t be like that girl.” Ragdoll furrowed his brow. “I’ve been around for a long time. You weren’t my first best friend.”
“I know,” the mare sighed with the first hint of real emotion, “But you were mine…”
-=-=-=-=-
The next day, they were navigating as per phone instructions. David had the phone up to his ear. "Hey. Yeah, we got in town last night. I'm the human you wanted to see?" A brief pause. "That's what we wanted to ask. When… Now is mostly fine…"
Joypad burst into snickers. "That's the answer I was expecting."
-=-=-=-=-
I keep my mouth shut and you do the talking.” The doll had a plan. “We sign the deal and we walk out.”
“All cool and casual, like we were acquiring a new pachinko machine for the one you broke.” the mare countered.
“That was not my fault.” Somehow the doll managed to smirk.
-=-=-=-=-
It was a wild coincidence, or simply a twist of fate from some upper agent that thought it was convenient, but the two groups ran into each other just outside of Pegasoft. David's hand had been reaching for the handle when a gasp made him look back to Joypad, who was looking at Gloom and her doll. "Oh, hey there," he got out, releasing the door for the moment. "Here for this place?"
Pegasoft, it should be mentioned, was a big building, a skyscraper by any measurement, with about 5 double doors leading into the front. The other four had pegasi coming and going busily despite the obstruction at the fifth.
“Yeah,” the doll nodded bonelessly as he spoke, “I’ll admit I’m curious about this whole ‘Evermarsh’ thing. Videogames are still kinda a rare thing in Bridlewood, so I just know the basics from the ad-rags they sent our boss. The name strikes me as familiar for some reason, which is odd because I’m sure it isn’t from Old Equestria. That was ‘HumanWay’, as I remember… weird I remember Old Equestria better than my own home world.”
"Ponyfinder." David provided no other context, perhaps none required. He opened the door to the inside. "We won't get what we want out here. After you." He waved Joypad inside, content to stand there until all of his combined party was inside.
"Thanks." Joypad trotted through the threshold, looking around a little awestruck. The inside of Pegasoft was even more amazing than the outside, with a lobby with a roof far too high, several receptionists desks and a low roar of activity.
“Pegasi like their big open vertical spaces,” Gloomy stated flatly.
“Eye’s on the prize, girl.” The dolls head darted around. “We could walk up to one of those reception desks… or, hear me out here: We could all stand around and gawk ‘till they notice the human they obviously sent for and send someone to us. Assuming y’all don’t mind merging our parties?”
After a moment of pantomimed gawking, Ragdoll Charlie turned towards David. “Wait, you mentioned something called ‘Ponyfinder’? That… was a game, I vaguely remember that being a game… I had something to do with…”
"Ponies. Are you a, or were you a player?" David allowed the door to close, though it was taken up by other pegasi on their journey to or from the building. That Charlie knew… "And are you Kai? I can't think of much else with that kind of voice that'd even have a dream of knowing about it."
Joypad peeked over her shoulder. "What's the holdup?"
“That’s a name I ain’t used in a long time.” Ragdoll Charlie looked down thoughtfully.
Before they could get comfortable, or even try to ask for directions, a pegasus landed in front of them, a big smile on his face and a sharp suit worn. He had a name tag, but he was moving too quickly to get a good look at it. "Welcome! There you are." His eyes were on David. "Pony of the hour. This way this way." He was moving to nudge David along away from the others.
Which David was not having. "I'm not alone."
"Then they can come with us!" And off he went, assuming they would follow by the way he strode.
“Team Mongoose!” The doll flailed like a muppet. “Can we call it team mongoose? “If there's a vote, I vote we call it Team Mongoose!”
Joypad glanced aside at their small plush companion. "I don't… We're a team? Um." She hurried to keep up with David and the pegasus. "I didn't catch your name."
"I didn't throw it. Zing!" He seemed quite confident in his own humor. "Jet Stream, president of media and advertisement." He pointed to his name badge, but he wasn't facing them, so that wasn't especially useful.
“So you’re Zing?” Ragdoll happily wagged his head at the stallion, “I’m Charlie, here to purchase three arcade machines for the Bridlewood Tea House. We are super curious about the source of your human lore… what with humans being a thing…”
“This wasn’t the plan,” Gloomy hissed at her passenger. “I’m the one who does the talking!”
Zing, er, Jet Stream quirked an ear at the voices behind him. "I'm not in sales. I get ponies to want to buy our things. Actually selling them? Whole other department." He nodded, confident in his place in the grand machine of the building. "Now, you're named David, right? David the human. That lacks a certain punch… How about Howard the Human?"
"Pretty happy with the name I have, thanks." David kept up with the power-walking pegasus. "So you want me as a mascot?"
“You are in the department of washing toilettes if this deal goes south.” The doll made his most disparaging boneless arm waves. “Name him something else one more time, I dare you.”
“Charlie, stop.” Gloomy shut her one visible eye.
“One more time, call my friend a name he didn’t choose.” The doll glared defiantly.
"Mascot's the wrong word." Jet Stream looked over at David as they came to an elevator. "You're could be, will be, I hope, the face of the brand!" He slapped the call button with a wing. "Evermarsh isn't the biggest series we have, but it's close. With an actual human here, it would become it in no time at all." His excitement made him more than a little resistant to the noises of others.
Joypad scooted between David and Jet. "So, at what point do you even ask how a human just… appeared out of nowhere?"
“They already knew.” Ragdoll wagged his face. “This is where human technology comes from. Pretty sure they know where we come from.”
If button eyes could narrow they would.
"Why he's here doesn't--" Jet looked David over again. "You are a human stallion, right?"
"Guydude," confirmed David. He didn't leave much to the imagination there, with a big beard and low voice, but what was obvious to a human was not a set of pony markers… "Actually that's a good question, where did all this technology come from?"
With a soft chime, the elevator arrived. "They were invented?" Jet proceeded into the elevator as other pegasi scurried to get out of it to other things. "Not my specialty. Our programmers work really hard to advance things, but, again, outside my wheelhouse. No, today, it's all about that face." He held up his hooves at David as if imagining it on a screen. "And how you can make us all a bit happier."
“Nope, nopity, nope nope,” the impassive smile and button eyes bore down on the poor stallion. “Everything you said goes on the nope train.”
The doll tapped a foreboding drum beat one his unicorn's hat.
“We all want to do business, but answers are required,” A smile tugged at the mare’s mouth as she chanted, “It would be a shame, if Briddlewood’s interests were rewired…”
Jet Stream finally looked at Gloomy and her doll. "Did you need directions to sales? Good ponies, really." The elevator began to move under them, carrying them into the air. "Probably better equipped to answer your questions." The ones he wasn't paying a lot of attention to.
“You insulted our friend,” The doll waggled his head sternly. “You told him to call himself not his name… The words we were waiting for are ‘I am so very sorry’. You just lost the Briddlewood account. Sorry, Gloomy, we gotta go to Maretime to play Evermarsh… assuming he don’t screw that up, too…”
“They have fish there, right?” Gloomy asked casually.
Jet inclined his head with a blink. "Pardon?" He looked back to David. "Did I bother you?"
"So long as we're clear on my name." David shrugged softly. "So this is an advertising blitz then?"
Joypad nudged against David. "You're taking this really calmly."
A fresh ding, the elevator opened and Jet was already heading out, the offer to follow unspoken.
Charlie hopped off of Gloomy’s head… and face planted bonelessly on the elevator floor.
“I’m okay, I ragdolled!” The doll declared, jumping to his velvetine hooves. Scrambling between the party and the corporate pegasi. “One minute, Zing, we gotta have a Team Mongoose Meeting real quick.”
"Jet Stream," he calmly corrected before suddenly realizing that the doll itself was addressing him. "Hm."
“Oh, I know,” Ragdoll Waggled his head in quick nods, “I’m being derisive because I don’t like you. 25% of Team Mongoose actively dislikes you personally. So you just wait there while we decide whether or not the most important deal of your life goes flank-side up.”
"I see potential," he sang out, clapping his hooves together. "What a special treat you are. Besides being human, you brought another interesting thing with you." He leaned in towards Charlie, suddenly focused on him. "Look at you! And you're not animated by the unicorn right there? Unicorn magic has novelty points, but those will wear off too quickly."
"I’m older than the oldest whorse you call a grandparent, colt.” The doll rose to his full diminutive size. “There are two humans here and they both know more of your history than you can even guess at, and little enough that it should scare you to soil the floor if you knew the half of it. Or did you not even realize you’d called two of us?”
"And he talks funny," is what Jet took out of that. "Hil… wait, you're not a human." He raised a brow at the little doll. "No no, shaped all wrong. We can't use you for that…" He turned away, hoof at his chin with a frown. "That'd just confuse the brand! You have to be careful about that. Now, this way! There are some ponies desperate to meet you."
David casually prodded the top of the little doll. "You haven't changed, but seriously, stop attacking the pony. He's just doing his job, and offering us cash, neither of which are crimes where I'm from."
“You right.” the doll nodded at the man, then turned to the company pony. “Just one word of truth before we walk in. Is this some ‘happy accident’?”
"Which part?" Jet Stream looked over his shoulder at his guests who were not following properly. "We heard about him." He pointed at David. "And invited him. That you came was, I thought, his idea? They are yours?"
David raised his hands placatingly. "They're my friends."
"Good enough." Order restored in his world, Jet took another step, looking to see if he'd be followed properly.
“They were looking for you,” Rag doll did his muppet grin at David. “Not random humans. Scooped me up on human rumors. I’ma give odd’s either Sam’s running this show, or it’s all down to Trixie. The Evermarsh thing is pretty obvious… Let’s see this…”
Joypad sidled up with Gloomy as they started forward. "Is he always so… prickly?" That she was referring to the doll was left unsaid.
"Now, I brought you to where some of our designers are working," continued Jet as if nothing odd had happened. "They make the magic!" His wings spread out wide with the statement. "And dream those dreams before they're made a reality for the playing, and paying, public!"
“Prickly?” the doll snorted, focusing his impassive eyes on the earth pony mare. “I resent the obvious reference to Snoopy’s cousin. Let's say hello to these nice ponies that called Team Mongoose together.”
“Nopony but you agreed to that,” Gloomy rolled her eyes.WEl
"Gonna assume that's a 'yes'." Joypad nodded, accelerating a little to beside Jet. "Hey, so I run a computer shop, where people play this game, and get together."
"Wonderful." Jet looked over at her as if trying to place her, but it did click. "The same place David lives at?"
David waved at his equine caretaker, or his boss, either way. "That's the place."
“And I just happen to be a former human transformed into a cursed jinx doll.” The doll nodded at Joypad, who seemed to be picking up what he was laying down. “And the next words out of your mouth will define your career….”
Gloomy beat a tempo on the floor with her hooves, as she looked jet in the eye. “Which voice will lose will depend one which you chose, or maybe which voice you ignore.” Her words echoing in the moment like a prophecy set loose on the breeze.
"It's him!" came a breathless female voice. Other pegasi were coming, each dressed as if they worked at a lab, though their mane styles were varied wildly as if showing their personalities through them. The one that spoke first was in front of David, grinning at him. "Wow! It's… Just like the model!"
"I knew they didn't have tails," noted a male pegasi, staring at bit intently at a human butt. "Take that!"
"Ha Ha," Another female. "I let it drop, didn't I? Now it's your turn."
The first began to clop her hooves wildly. "Can we see your walk cycle, please?"
"Well played, Zing.” Charlie twisted his set sewn smile into a grin.
David was content to show off his 'walk cycle' by taking a few pointed steps one way, then the other, though he staggered on the way back. "Oops."
Joypad was quick to offer a hoof. "Take it easy there, greymane."
"Oh!" The second female inclined her head. "Are you an older human?"
The male nodded, hoof at his chin. "Interesting!"
"Just a clumsy moment," assured David, waving off the concern. "All good."
“You old. Own it.” Ragdoll flogged bonelessly behind him.
The second female looked down at the doll, one ear quirked. "Did you say you were a human?"
"On a scale of one to ten." The male spread his hooves apart. "How much would you say your flat face impedes your breathing?"
"Zero?" David did not sound very sure on that. "Never had a not-flat face to compare against, but I can breathe just fine." He took a nice deep breath just to show off that fact.
“You didn't know? I was 90% sure you knew?” Charlie asked the nice mare. “But you do know we exist…”
“Make sure to get payment up front before they accidently turn you into a pony…” The doll whispered to David.
A loud stage whisper, to reach David's high-ears. Why were humans so tall?! "I don't think these nice ponies want to do that. If they don't have a human to show off, that ruins it."
"Completely," agreed the first female.
"Utterly," agreed the male.
"That would be a waste," signed the second female, still in front of Charlie the doll. "Like you. We can't use you as a human, because you aren't anymore… That's unfortunate."
“Then you are in agreement that the shape of a thing defines it.” Gloomy stated with all the passion of a pony who just saw that the salad bar was out of spinach.
The first female inclined her head. "When you're talking about an advertisement… yes?" The others all nodded with her, Jet included.
The pegasi were only growing more excited, unlike Joypad, who was keeping a more careful eye on David. "You don't look so well."
"Ah'm fine," he got out, a little slurred. "Sorry, need to watch…" He paused as if to collect his words. "--myself. We--"
"Eh…" Joypad looked far from convinced.
“Hey, David… buddy…” Ragdoll scrambled over to his friend. “I know you ain’t drunk this time of morning. That would be more my thing. We are getting you to some medical attention, stat. Sorry Jet, we gotta reschedule. If you could point us to the nearest clinic, that would be great! Joypad, how long has he been here for and has he found a local source for his meds?”
Joypad frowned softly. "Meds?"
Ah, right, those. "Why would they have that?" David sagged against a desk, even if it was being worked at. It was a convenient thing to lean against. "I'll be fine. Just need to relax a second."
Jet and the designers were all confused by the sharp turn. The second female squinted at David. "Do you have some kind of human problem? An old human problem?" The others perked as if that made sense.
“He has a… I’ma go with ‘blood condition’.” Ragdoll Charlie nodded emphatically. “He needs a doctor… no wait, make that a veterinarian. We need a medical professional competent treating other species. A pony doctor would be worse than worthless.”
"It isn't a blood thing," laughed out David, even if he had his eyes closed as he did it. "Alright… better…"
The first female shook her head. "We can't have our star being sick. Your little doll friend has a good idea. To the vet!"
Jet frowned suddenly. "Sending one of our stars to a vet feels odd when they can talk." But was a better idea coming? Not really. "Let's get him moving."
The meeting was brought to an unceremonious halt with the first rolling over a wheelchair, casually knocking David over the moment he stood up fully, right into it. "Off we go!" She trotted energetically towards the elevator, Joy trailing behind her.
“Sorry to cut it short Jet, and for what it’s worth, I’ve decided you all right,” the doll waggled a leg from his renewed perch atop Gloomy’s beret, “I’m still gonna call you Zing forever, but you lookin’ out for my friend puts you in the the ‘good’ book. You alright.”
"Was it the food?" reasoned Joy as they went, pausing for the elevator to come. "You were fibbing about that, weren't you? I let you poison yourself with something." She was dancing hoof to hoof with obvious worry.
"It isn't that, promise." He found a soft pony ear and began to pet it gently. "Nothing you could have done a thing about. More it a ticking bomb I didn't have last time I came to visit Equestria."
Jet was left with a doll. "Hm." He was left with a doll. Just a doll. "A talking doll." As if he were responding to the announcer of the world. "Maybe we could… do something with that."
“I need three coin operated cabinet games delivered to the Crystal Tea House in Bridlewood to start.” Gloomy rolled her eyes, her voice even, almost bored.
“Uh, Gloomy… medical emergency…” Rag Doll flailed.
“...Is being attended to.” Gloomy Sonet heaved a heavy sigh. “We get to the meeting and then I do the talking. Stick to the plan.”
She… wasn’t wrong?
Out came a phone. Beep boop beep. "Hey! It's Jet, yeah… Got a customer here with something I want that needs some cabinet games, uh huh… Let me ask." Jet lowered the phone, smiling at Gloomy. "Which games?"
“Our current best performing games involve competition between players. And pinball. Everypony loves pinball.” Gloomy looked into the middle distance. “I need the two you think would collect the most tokens.”
"Well, we don't do pinball games," came the masculine voice over the phone held atop Jet's hoof. "But we got all kinds of great arcade games! You want multiplayer? You got it. We'll take their tokens and make them rush to give you some more. You got a theme going for your arcade?" They sounded almost as eager as Jet, though with a different focus clearly.
“We are the game house that gave the Unicorn Crystal as a prize.” Gloomy stamped a little rhythm with her hooves.
And so the debate continued to find the proper game that'd fit in with a unicorn arcade. "You have electricity, right?" One did have to confirm that.
Meanwhile, David was being thrust in front of a pegasus with a big red cross on her hat with little hearts blossoming from its points. "What?" She inclined her head at the human. "I've never seen an animal like that before."
"Mammal, simian," offered David helpfully, or so he hoped. "Sapient."
"I see that last part." She pawed at an ear with a hoof. "Or hear it, I suppose is more accurate. If you can talk, you tell me what's wrong, or at least what feels wrong." She sat down with a little smile. "That's a step I normally can't make with my patients."
That got a chuckle at the thought of it. "I imagine not. So… Pretty sure my immune system is busy chewing on the cords, which is causing problems. I have no idea how far advanced your medical tech is. Did anything I say make even a little--bit of a sense?"
The poor vet inclined her head slowly at that. "Which cords do you mean?"
"Nerves." He wriggled his fingers as if that could help imitate dendrites. "A nerve is covered in a layer of insulation, and that's being… attacked, which can cause them to be dam-- damaged, or short out."
"That sounds awful…" She frowned with obvious thoughts. "But I don't have medicine for that… And that doesn't sound like something I can… bandage or cut."
"No, not really." David was not arguing that.
To Joypad's annoyance. "Stop taking everything calmly." She swatted at him lightly. "This is your life on the line."
"What can we do about it?" countered David. "I could flail, but that won't fix it." He pointed to the nice pegasus vet. "She wants to help, which, thanks, but she can't." He closed his eyes as if against a headache. "I didn't want to experience that again…"
"Sorry to bother you." The vet was still there. "But does this condition have a name by chance?"
"Hm?" Well, couldn't hurt. "Multiple Sclerosis, or Many Scars. Refers to the scars you get on the nerve lining I was just talking about." He pinched the bridge of his nose. "Adventuring when you're older isn't easy."
"You have some kind of…" Joypad was leaning in from the side, examining her human as if she could see the problem. "Terrible thing and you didn't tell me? Why?!"
"I was hoping it'd go away? I was hoping Equestria didn't worry about that. Different world, different rules." He shrugged softly. "I'm feeling better." And he pushed up out of the chair. "Just knocks the wind out of your sails a… bit."
"You are not better," Joy practically yelped at him. "Doctor, what can we do?"
But the vet shrugged. "The only idea that comes to mind would be to try the unicorns. They have magic." She wagged her hooves in a hopefully magic way. "They could maybe magic the problem away? I can't help."
Back in the tech tower, another Text's creation argued. “David lives,” The ragdoll muttered.
“You are aware of what this is going to cost? That wasn’t even my call to make!”
The words were for Charlie alone, floating clearly in his mind's eye, which was the only place it needed to be.
In the vet's lab, the other Text spoke to David, words appearing silently. Was that even speaking?
Your friend is arguing for you. Silly, really. Their Text has no power over you.
"That's nice of him," noted David quietly as the others talked and debated about what to do with him. "Don't punish him for it."
And I have no power over them, so no reason to fear that. All fair, in the end. But their Text knows. They know we're talking, just as I know they are.
Back above: "There’s nothing you can do about that.” Gloomy beat her gentle rhythm on the floor, scooping her doll into a hug.
"He must have been tired." The vet shook her head at the suddenly napping human in her clinic. "Well, unfortunately, I can't help them any more than I had… They aren't in pain, are they?" The two that accompanied the human shook their heads.
"Not like he'd admit it," grumbled Joypad. "Well, he might, but he didn't. Just got real dizzy all of a sudden like he forgot which way is up."
The vet offered a small bottle. "From his weight, offer two of these if he is experiencing pain. I really do wish I could offer more. I don't like seeing a suffering animal of any kind."
The female that had come with them from Pegasoft frowned softly. "Well, we don't want to lose our spokepony that quickly… Sounds like he has to go to the unicorns."
"Sounds like," agreed Joypad in a far less certain voice. She got in behind the chair and got to pushing. "Well, we know a unicorn at least. They got here safely. They should know how to get back."
Meanwhile back at the meeting, “You drive a hard bargain, filly,” Jet smirked, “But I think you and your friends will find this agreement, well, agreeable. There’s even a clause to acknowledge your friend’s humanity in the event of ‘unicorn shape-changing’… let me say that’s some imagination you’ve got there.”
“Humans sometimes change shape when contacted by pony magic,” Gloomy stated the boring historical trivia point boredly, by rote, “It goes back to an ancient disease from an alternate universe. At least that’s what my jinx-doll told me.”
“Pretty sure that’s why you ain’t got no humans now…” Ragdoll inputted in a hushed voice. “They all turned into ponies…”
But David woke suddenly, jerking into motion. "Wait!"
Joypad stopped, not even having escaped the animal hospital he had been brought to. "Welcome back to waking."
"Thanks." David was already standing, getting up nigh instantly from his nap. "I want to ask the doctor something. She here?"
"I am." She was in the hallway leading into the back, peering at David curiously. "I should get to the next patient. What's up?"
David pointed to Joypad. "I fed her some… potatoes? Tubers of some kind. Just want to be sure they weren't poisonous."
The doctor shook her head. "My specialty is animal medicine. Ponies should avoid random things that look like potatoes, but if you aren't dead." She looked Joypad over, very not dead. "You're fine, just don't make that a habit. Fluffy!" Three ponies looked at her. "A cat?" Two ponies were still looking. "Male?" Ah, one pony left. "This way please."
The Pegasoft designer was peering at David with an unsure gaze. "I know you're standing, but are you up to--"
"I'm fine."
"He's not fine," grumped Joypad. "Sit down and let your friend take care of you!"
"I'm not…" Despite that, he did sit down, looking a bit abashed. "Thank you…"
"You're welcome." Joypad got to pushing the chair forward. "I swear, you don't lose points leaning on your friends. It's what they're good for. You've helped me out before, only fair."
The designer followed along with a smile. "Hopefully your other friends, the unicorn and her doll, are still there. They can help us get to the unicorn town."
Joy raised a brow at the pegasus that had joined them. "Don't you have games to design?"
"I have a thousand questions!" She closed in from the side of the wheelchair. "We have myth, and in-game lore, but never ever did we have an actual human to ask, if you don't mind? Please?"
It was the ride up the elevator that seemed to bother David most. "I don't have to sit for the entire ride."
Joypad tapped at the chair they perched him on. "You can stay right there. Besides, it's a little elevator. What are you even going to do in here?"
With a soft chime, they arrived at their destination. "Stupid question." They pushed David along even as he asked it. "Why do ponies use wheelchairs when they have four legs?"
Joypad squinted at him. "Because sometimes they can't use all four? Duh? Where are the other two?" The designer took off ahead of Joypad on the hunt.
“You’re back,” Gloomy Sonnet noted in a bored tone, “See, Charlie, your human friend is fine.”
“Fine?!?!” The doll flailed like a muppet having a seizure. “He’s in a wheelchair! He was walking just fine when he left! That is not fine!”
"My legs work just fine." To prove it, David got back up, despite the glaring this earned from Joypad. "Ta da. Now, we--"
"--need to get to Bridlewood, unless you're a super keen wizard?" Joypad peered at Gloomy with evident doubt.
"I need him to answer questions, so please help us help him." The designed clopped a hoof, clearly set on the task at present.
“I can manipulate ponies with the magic of rhythm.” Gloomy stated the simple fact with neither pride nor humility. “But I doubt that would help here.”
“Wait… every time you were doing that cute little thing with your hooves…” Jet stepped back suddenly.
“I was playing you like a steel drum, yes,” Gloomy admitted shamelessly. “That’s why the plan was for *me* to do the talking.” She shot her beloved jinx doll a momentary glare, then continued. “Charlie, can Jinx things sometimes, but he already tried that.”
“Yeah, the Text was kinda cagey.” The doll shook its head.
Joypad shook her head. "That's fine, so we need somepony that can shatter curses and/or heal ponies. You know someone who fits that description?"
“The pony to talk to would be our boss.” Ragdoll rubbed his chin in thought. “Alphabittle knows pretty much every unicorn in Bridlewood.”
The female designer clopped her hooves. "Great! So that's where we need to be."
"You're on the right track." Joypad met the designer's hoof in a loud clop, proving, again, that different tribes could agree. "We're off."
Jet let out a little eh. "Have you informed your manager?"
"No, but you will." The designer shot Jet a winning smile. "And I'm trying to secure our human, so it's 100% job related. Not like we have a better pony for the job."
“Welcome to the ‘totally not taking a vacation on the job’ club.” The doll threw up his arms in a victorious “V”.
“We should all resupply. The trip back to Bridlewood is a two-day walk.” Gloomy suggested reasonably. “If we leave in the morning, we can make camp at Izzy’s Bridge and get to Bridlewood by lunchtime.”
“Also, we should totally go to a pegasus bar and grill!” The doll waved his arms emphatically. “Everyone who eats gets to try Pegasus food, and I wanna soak my head in random beverages… What? That’s the only way I can taste things!”
Joypad let out a huh. "Our towns are about the same distance apart."
"About. Not quite the same." David shrugged as he headed back towards the elevator. "By the way, you never gave us your name. We need something to go by."
"Wha? Oh!" The designer pointed to herself. "Me? Back Story!" Back dipped her head at David even as she scampered after him. "Which is also my specialty, and why I need to know more."
“So we have a plan!” The doll clopped his front velveteen hooves together noiselessly. We all refill our camping gear, and meet back up at… Hey, Zing, where’s a good place to go for a fun meal? High protein items and a wide variety of drinkable liquids are a must?”
Jet raised a brow at the insisting doll. "She's on the clock. She better get straight to Bridlewood and back."
"I will," came Back's call as she pressed the elevator call button perhaps more times than strictly required.
“We have a plan.” Gloomy’s rhythmic hoofbeats would not be denied. “We gather supplies, meet at an appropriate dining facility to establish further planning, and we set out in the morning. It is a serviceable plan. Stick to the plan, Mr. Jet.”
“Ding, the elevator opened, allowing Back to flee with a less manic but just as driven David behind her. Joy was a step behind, pushing the chair along even with no occupant in it at that moment.
Gloomy trotted sedately into the elevator, catching her passenger off guard. He turned around and waved a hoof. “Good meeting ya, Zing. I know I’m always smiling, but this is totally a sincere smile. You alright. Sorry we got off the wrong hoof.”
Jet applied a hoof to his face. "Change of plans," he muttered to himself with a spirited trot away. He would not be making a model of advertisements with the human, at least not that day.
The elevator doors slid shut and began the trek downwards. Back suddenly wheeled on the unicorn+1. "Why are you trying to get me in trouble?! All he needs to know is I'm helping him." She pointed to David with an equine snort. "Any more than that is just questions on questions. He isn't my boss, he's just going to let them know. That's it."
“Sorry.” Ragdoll Charlie's ears tilted back and he hung his plushy head in shame. “I was genuinely trying to be friendly with him. I gave him a kinda hard time. Really misread the room…”
“That is why the plan was that I was supposed to do the talking.” Gloomy huffed.
“Yeah, sorry… I kinda went into ‘evil corporate conspiracy mode.’” The doll nodded. “I mean, the whole thing was kinda sus… two ‘humans’ showing up at the same time at a big game company with all this obviously human tech everywhere. And I kinda felt bad… but I definitely didn’t mean to get you in trouble, Ms. Story…”
Back Story stomped a hoof at that. "What are you talking about? Humans aren't technology… Or are they?" She squinted at the two of them, the two humans, even if one of them wasn't human shaped. "Our humans are about equal on--"
"--We're here." Joypad nudged the wheelchair out the opening doors. "Let's not keep this elevator busy for the other ponies." As if conjured, there were many other ponies waiting to get into that elevator behind Joy, but waiting impatiently.
David scooted out, getting some glances, but most seemed quite intent on getting to work. "Today's been interesting, but let's keep it easy."
“He’s been going on about ‘electronics’ since I was ten.” Gloomy rolled her eyes. “Your technology is based on their technology.” She waved a hoof between the developer and the humans. “I’m unsure whether it comes from all powerful words or a magic mirror. I know it’s a lot and he and he just blurts it out. You have my sympathy.”
Ragdoll had the sense to keep quiet and look ashamed.”
Back waved that away. "Oh, well, compared to unicorn technology, he's probably right." She lit up instantly afterwards. "No offense!"
"Cold." David grabbed the chair and casually folded it shut from left to right, allowing him to carry it with only a moderate amount of difficulty.
"Hey!" Not that this pleased Joypad, trailing after him. "That's for you, when you fall over again."
“There are no paved roads in between the places we are going.” Gloomy pointed out. That chair would just be one more thing to carry.”
“She ain’t wrong. We’d be better off carrying him than trying to push a wheelchair off-road.” Ragdoll nodded as sagely as a plush toy could, then added cheerfully, “It’s a good thing we’ve got a strong earth pony who can do that!”
"Actually." David was pointing forward with both hands despite both being full of the chair. "Why don't we grab the floating disc from back at the hotel? We'll want it anyway, and can use it for that if needed, which we hopefully will not."
Joy snuck forward to grab the chair with her hooves, wrenching it away from David. "Well fine! Then we shouldn't steal this." She casually placed it beside the front counter with a nod. "It doesn't belong to us, anyway."
“Okay…” Ragdoll nodded dubiously. “We will all split up and get equipment and/or supplies, and meet at…” The doll did a complicated little dance across Gloomy’s cell phone. “...Apple Buck’s on the corner of Flutter Blvd and Dash Ave? And don’t apparently steal medical equipment…”
With a destination set, two mares accompanied David. Both seemed to watch him with caution, though one was far more curious than the other. "So… I didn't get to ask, but what's your religion like?"
"That's a complicated question that depends on the human being asked."
"Knew it!" Back Story did a little dancing flail mid-step. "Humans are religious, and very varied. Fascinating!"
Joy nudged Back away, coming between them. "Stop bothering him!"
Despite that, they got the floating disc easily, still loaded up with the supplies they had from the trip there. Back Story led them to an outdoor shop. "Huh." Joy craned her neck around. "This doesn't look much different from the one in Maretime Bay."
Back giggled at that. "One outdoor shop to another, and who could tell the difference?. Why would they look that different?" She trotted up to the counter and got to ordering supplies, though more of than blinked than the supplies they had gotten the first time.
Meanwhile, in another camping supply store…
“What was that, back there?” Gloomy snapped irritably at the doll as she gathered dried goods into her cart. “We. Had. A. Plan! I do the talking! You almost lost us the whole deal with your paranoia!”
“I’m sorry Gloomy.” The doll slumped. “Everything just kinda hit all at once, and I just… I don’t know…”
“You didn’t think. You just said the first thing out of your head, and I can’t be your filter the way I used to,” the unicorn replied, pulling Ragdoll down from her cap and giving him a nuzzle, “I’m not a little filly anymore, and you're not cursed to live vicariously through me. A lot has changed… some of it changed all at once when the magic came back, but a lot of it changed so slowly that I don’t think you ever completely realized it happened. You're not a mentoring voice in the back of my head anymore, Charlie, and I’m the only way you have to experience the world. We’re partners in this now, which is way healthier than what we had before.”
“I know, girl.” Ragdoll Charlie returned the nuzzle affectionately. “I’m trying.”
“I know you are Charlie,” the unicorn’s grim visage flashed a brief smile. “It just takes time.”
They had their supplies and met on the outskirts of that busy city. Joypad waved back at it. "I was sure when I left there, I would head back to Maretime with stories." She turned back in the direction they had chosen. "Not going in some new direction."
Back raised a hoof. "I never left Zephyr Heights. Perhaps this is the start of some grand adventure that will ensure personal growth through challenges, big and small!"
“I still think we should have left in the morning. Either way, we got two nights between us and Bridlewood.” Ragdoll crossed his arms and sulked. “At least my way involved one of those nights involving a good meal and actual beds.”
“Shush,” Gloomy admonished her doll, “You don’t even eat… or sleep at least half the time. Plans change sometimes.”
Back wandered towards Gloomy with an unsure smile. "What's this bridge you were talking about?"
David waved the question off. "A unicorn thing, which I'm sure we'll get to hear about." They had a path and a plan, and the walking started.
“So,” Ragdoll asked their pegasus companion as the party hiked across the wilderness, “You guys really did not know that humans were real at all? I really had my hopes up that maybe the pegasi had some kind of… I don’t know… something. Some idea of what happened to old Equestria…”
"No, silly." Back Story giggled off the idea with a few waves of a hoof. "Humans are a myth, like a lot of creatures Pegasoft has used over the years. They say a really old storyteller made them up. Haven't you studied the classics?"
“They were obviously less mythical than previously assumed.” Gloomy rolled her eyes in boredom as the terrain slowly moved past the travelers. “What other creatures have you been assuming were mythological?”
“Good thinking, girl!” Ragdoll beamed. “If nothing else, we can get a pretty good idea of just how big the gap in history actually is… and how much was completely lost.”
Back squinted in suspicion that was entirely open. "Back on topic." She moved to hike alongside David. "So, about the females of your species we've heard so much about. I was told they have a dramatic sexual dimorphism. Did we get it right?"
David chuckled at the question being posed to him. "I only saw one in the game." Admittedly, she was a main character. "She looked put together properly, so no complaints there."
“I mean, what I saw in the ads you sent to the tea house looked ‘bout right.” Nodded Ragdoll, “At least you put the boobs in the right place.”
"Boobs? What do birds have to do with this?" Back Story looked quite baffled at the idea. "Do humans have birds?! And we put them in the right place!?"
David made a quick placating gesture. "No, no, that was slang."
"Oh! Slang, that meant…"
"Nothing you need to worry 'bout." Even if she did pout at his shut down of the question.
“Heh, trying to shelter the innocent little ponies?” Ragdoll's expression was as unchanging as ever, but somehow he smirked. Then turned back to Back Story. “Seriously, I am curious about your mythology. Where do your mythical humans come from?”
"Oh, that I can answer no problem." Back Story slid back towards the doll and his unicorn mount. "In the original myth, humans come from the southern lands. Their lack of fur made them really uncomfortable in chilly places, you see? But they were clever!" She reached out a hoof and waggled it a little. "They had clever fingers and clever minds. What they couldn't do naturally, they figured out with their brains!" Joypad strolled up in the space Back had abandoned, taking up the spot next to David. "You look tired, and you won't admit it. Do you want to get on the disc?"
He had no such desire, and it was clear on his face. "I'd rather not."
"Then I offer something else and something amazing. You'd better not say no, or you'll hurt my feelings." With emotional blackmail set in place, Joypad came closer. "I'll give you a ride."
“Southern lands, heh, that’s a pretty clever explanation.” Ragdoll nodded thoughtfully. “It makes a certain degree of sense. Do you want to know where we actually came from? It’ll blow your mind.”
"It's an expression?" Back squinted at the doll. "There are no humans. Well, there's one human, but he's a human, which is not a human group."
"You're not a horse." Joypad snorted at his words. "Alright, you're a little horse."
"And you're a big ape." Joypad was still smiling up at David. "Now get on. You're not that heavy."
Ragdoll snorted in amusement as his friends debated pony rides. Meanwhile, Gloomy turned her attention to Back Story. “There is only one human right here in front of you. He came from somewhere, so it’s safe to assume there are probably more humans there.”
Back shot David an accusing squint as if he was hiding a thousand secrets from her. "And you know where they're hiding?"
Though uncertain, David tossed a leg over Joypad. As he predicted, she was not a very large mount, with his feet easily reaching the ground. Still, if he drew them up a little, then Joypad could carry him along with no sounds of great effort along the way. "You sure I'm not too heavy?"
“This is too good,” Ragdoll guffawed out loud. “Yeah, David, where are all the humans hiding?”
“Charlie,” Gloomy sedate voice took on a warning tone, “Don’t be mean.”
“You, right girl,” Ragdoll nodded, “Sorry. The humans aren’t hiding. They are walking around their home universes in broad daylight, largely very self assured that the magical talking ponies are just myths.”
Back Story clopped her hooves in a brief rearing up. "Fantastic! Mirrored worlds with mirrored myths to go with it. That makes sense. That means there must be at least one pony there, hiding. I wonder if they'll ever find them." She tapped at her chin with new thoughts.
David leaned forward on Joypad as best he could, seeking the ideal riding position for a pony. "What are you talking about?"
Joypad hastened to catch up with the others despite her baggage. "Ditto that. What are you all talking about? Sounds like a bunch of nonsense. Anyway! I read the classics."
"Finally, someone did!" Back giddily cantered in class. "Go ahead, tell them!"
“Charlie explained that humans come from an infinite array of alien universes where the laws of nature are twisted and ponies are mute service animals.” Gloomy explained nonchalantly. “She’s taking the existence of an infinite possibility better than I did. I’m still not completely past the existential fear of the concept.”
“Yeah.” The doll sheepishly rubbed the back of his head with a hoof. “I probably shouldn’t have dropped that on you when you were, like, ten…”
Back rolled her eyes. "That's obviously wrong, or it's not a mirror, which it is. There's one pony hiding somewhere." She suddenly leaned in towards Gloomy. "The not talking ones aren't ponies, clearly. They're just related. Horses, not ponies, duh." She was not at all ruffled.
David rolled a hand for as long as he could before he had to regain his balance. "How did this start? It doesn't even matter, as we're not reaching that world soon. I'm not going back, so we're stuck with what we have right here."
“We’re not talking about going back, obviously.” He couldn’t stick out his tongue, because he didn’t have one of those. “I’m just instructing our pegasus friend on the real backstory behind humans. That thing she’s interested in.” The doll returned his attention to Back Story. “Actually, the mirror universe turned ponies into humans when they went there. Though you're not wrong… there was one pony hiding in that universe… Most human universes, though, have no talking ponies. David’s right though, it’s almost impossible to get to those from here…”
"He's literally spouting nonsense from stories people have written, me included."
Joypad turned an ear back at the human on her. "Oh yeah, you mentioned you wrote. Shoot, and here I am going and ignoring that. What do you need to get back to writing?"
"You write?!" That drew Back Story over magnetically. "I would very much like to see this writing. But before we get far, Joypad, the classics?"
Joypad pricked up at being reminded. "Right, the classics include a collection of stories from one 'Rough Draft' who wrote about all kinds of strange mythological creatures and how they lived."
“Well, there you go,” Ragdoll waved a plushy hoof in the air. “Rough Draft was clearly a historical figure and not a fictional character in a human’s story. That shoots down everything I was just saying.”
"Well, damnit." David's grip on Joy's mane tightened a moment. "That says something, and leaves a lot of blank, and it still doesn't matter much."
"Well excuse you." Joypad rolled her eyes softly. "I was just explaining some literature."
"I appreciate your sharing." Back bumped against Joypad, trapping David's leg for a short time. "So yeah, so there! You're not speaking sense to those humans."
“Rough Draft’s stories were never especially popular in Bridlewood,” Gloomy admitted. “I mostly just looked at them for Charlie.”
“You were my eye’s and my mobility.” The doll tumbled onto the mare's muzzle with all four hooves.
“I’m more familiar with Charlie going on about it than the stories themselves.” Despite her dull, near sarcastic tone, a smile tugged at her stern features.
Back zoomed in on Gloomy. "You know Rough Draft? He's one of pegasi's greatest writers!"
Joy laughed at the very notion. "Rough Draft was an earth pony, not a pegasus. We wouldn't have read pegasus stories as foals."
“He was definitely not a unicorn.” Gloomy stated with utter certainty. “That’s why his work was never popular in Bridlewood.”
Back inclined her head. "Fascinating. I suppose he's as much a myth as any of his writing. Maybe he never existed." She shrugged with serene acceptance. "We still ran with the story and got the humans."
Joy lifted an ear. "I thought you were copying a little earth pony folklore with an obscure story."
“Our boss just wanted the games for the tearoom,” Gloomy explained calmly, then rolled her eyes. “Then Charlie assumed multiverse shenanigans.”
“Yo mom is multiverse shenanigans!” Ragdoll snapped back.
“Your face is literally multiverse shenanigans,” Gloomy impassively replied.
“Well played girl,” the doll nodded. “Well played.”
Back Story shook her head. "The series is older than we've been friends. Now, Mister Human, are there any other humans, or are you alone?"
"Not that alone." David gently patted the top of Joypad. "Can't say I'm alone when I'm getting a ride from someone just because they like me."
“I'd be surprised if there aren’t hidden tribes of humans.” The doll opined. “There is a lot of missing history. And honestly, David’s right, for all I know, everything I know applies to some other universe and I could be completely wrong.”
David shrugged at the carried doll. "You keep going on and on about great things when you're in the same boat. We're both being carted along by ponies that decided we're worth the trouble."
Joy pushed ahead. "Speaking of that, we should get moving. The sooner we get there, the better."
“Yeah, we need to find a place to make camp,” Ragdoll agreed readily with his new friend. “We should make it to Izzy’s bridge by midmorning. If we push, we can be in Bridlewood by nightfall.”
There were no horrible monsters or thieving animals coming for them on the way to Bridlewood, perhaps helped by having a doll with them that didn't need any sleep. Joy's tent provided sleeping arrangements for three, if the three didn't mind being fairly close.
David collapsed near the side without complaint. Joy joined him quickly in a curl, neither touching him nor especially avoiding him.
“We’re crossing Izzy’s bridge and bringing back Earth Ponies and Pegasi… to Bridlewood!” Gloomy let out a little squee of joy and kicked her hooves inside her tent. She wasn’t the first Unicorn to do this, thus the name of the bridge. But she was doing it.
“Yeah, Gloomy… get some sleep.” Her doll gently petted her behind her ears. “It’s my turn to be your eyes.”
Joypad turned an ear on the pony and her wriggling hooves. "That excited, huh? I never visited Bridlewood."
“We have the best games!” Gloomy giggled from her tent. “Do you even have pinball in Mare Time bay? Every unicorn in Bridlewood made at least one piece of every one of our games. And they are all hoof made.”
"I can hear you." Back Story had no tent, just nestled in a sleeping bag outside of it. "And I'd like to try a unicorn pinball game, even if it's… not the same as ours." A little noise and a thoughtful hum. "So do you have any electricity?"
“We have electricity!” Gloomy hollered back from her tent.
“Good luck finding a standard plug!” Ragdoll hollered. “It’s like making a PlayStation work with an Atari adapter…” The doll fell into a tired grumbling… “ I mean, it can be done…”
The rabbit-like creatures gazed curiously at the strange walking doll-thing that paced between them and the tasty snacks they so desired. As the doll paced, it lectured the bunnies as though they were a class of students.
“Now the unicorns,” the odd thing lectured, “are the perfect example of a fallen culture. It’s perfectly reasonable to assume their history was simply ‘lost’ when the magic disappeared. Let’s be honest, Bridlewood is a remote, backwards village. I try to be nice for Alphabittle and Gloomy’s sake, but it’s kinda a slum. It’s understandable that their historical records aren’t up to snuff.”
“But the pegasi, on the other hoof…” Ragdoll spun, pointing directly at a bunny trying to sneak around him to the snacks that were meant for ponies. The offending bunny let out a meep and took its place back with its peers attending the lecture none of them likely understood or cared about. “Their technology is actually far beyond anything Old Equestria could even dream of. They have computers, databases, and social media! There’s no way they just ‘lost’ their history. Logistically impossible! No, their history was clearly destroyed and/or heavily edited on purpose. Changing Rough Draft into a pegasus all but confirms it…”
"Who are you, mmm, talking to?" Sitting up was enough for Back Story to scare away all the rabbits. "Oh, aw. They didn't stick around." Despite any amount of disappointment, Back was already getting her things in order to move on with the journey. "Good morning. When did you wake up?"
“Oh, I'm sorry… I try to keep quiet, but the line between thinking and talking… I didn't mean to wake you. How much did you hear? I’m easy to ignore… I’m just a doll…” The doll withdrew on itself.
"Wake up," hollered Back into the tent she wasn't sleeping in. "Hm? Hear? I heard talking, and I woke up." She got to setting things up for breakfast with a little whistle. "Did I miss something?"
“I was there,” Ragdoll collapsed in a ragged heap. “I gave everything I had to the Text to send me anywhere else. I’m sorry for the way I behaved back at Pegasoft, but I thought I saw a thread back to what I remember… part of it.” Three strings in Ragdoll’s smile broke free and hissed like snakes. “I respect your work Ms. Back Story.”
Back clapped her hooves animatedly. "I love bringing ideas to life. They just need that extra little spice. That's part of, oh." She nodded to each pony and human emerging from the tent. "Breakfast will be ready soon!" With food protected, there was nothing stopping Back Story from creating a lovely meal for the group of them without difficulty. That they got a more secure roof for the disc also helped. "Eat up!"
“Please,” the doll begged the pegasus. “There are names… ‘Diane’... ‘Carrot Plate’... ‘Z-978’... The text insured me they would live…” The doll broke down entirely. “If any of you had records it was Zephyr Heights… I really wanted it to be a conspiracy… because then there would have been something.”
Back inclined her head at the upset doll. "Um… One of those sounds like a name, probably earth pony?"
Joypad sat next to the fire and accepted her bowl of tasty slop. "Mmm, but that is racist, just sayin'. There are a lot more unicorn farmers these days, I think." She got to chomping down on her breakfast readily. "How are you feeling?" She was watching David.
"Doing fine." He ate with a smile despite other factors. "You have a good sleep?"
"It isn't my sleep I'm worried about." She set her bowl aside, emptied.
“She was a unicorn,” Ragdoll said with a flop. “She was a Unicorn that had the courage to run away.”
“I'm a unicorn.” Gloomy wandered out of her tent. “I already knew I wasn’t the first pony…”
Joypad's eyes darted between the two. "Well, eat up. One of you at least, since I think the other doesn't eat?"
Back Story shook her head. "Are you powered by magic?"
“That’s… a good question…” Ragdoll scratched his chin. “When I made the deal that turned me into… well this… I lost almost all my physical senses. Kinda like a sleepless dream. I woke up around 20 years back when gloomy found me, but I still couldn’t move and no one but Gloomy could hear me until magic came back.”
“All the other unicorns thought I was just crazy,” Gloomy said blankly, as she scooped he doll up and placed him back on her hat, “It was cute when I was filly, but the older I got, the more they’d stare at me talking to my doll.”
Back tapped slowly at the ground. "Huh… Huh! Like… Like Return Two!"
Joy was helping clean up breakfast for moving. "The one in first person?"
"That one." Back danced with joy. "It's just like it. I wonder if we were inspired by things that could have been, or maybe are? Ha, listen to me get all philosophical."
David delivered a single pat to Gloomy on the way past. "Sounds rough at the best. Doing better now, I hope?"
“It’s… different…” Gloomy responded non-committedly. “It’s better that everyone else can hear Charlie and they know I’m not just talking to myself. It’s scary too. My friend could leave now, if he wanted.”
“I’m not gonna leave, Gloomy.” Ragdoll hugged her horn, the nearest part of the unicorn he could hug. “What we had before was great… but it wasn’t healthy. It was real, but it wasn’t real friendship. This is. Heh, maybe that’s what I’m powered by. Back in old Equestria they kept going on about how friendship was magic…”
"Like!" It was prompt enough to get Back Story rambling about another old tale of when friendship really was magic. Sure, it was in a foal's game, but nothing new was invented, just remixed. Her story was the first of many she was happy to share on the way to the unicorn town.
“Ya know,” Ragdoll opined to Back’s ramblings, “I guess that’s what I’m chasing, stories. That’s all that’s left of the world I left behind. God’s of Heck, is that what it was like for Iam? No wonder he went insane… Oh, wait… we’re here…”
The magical village of, er. David saw a sign to check that name. "Bridlewood," he said out loud while reading it. "Always thought that was a funny name, in a good way."
Joypad fired a finger gun, despite having no fingers, at the village. "It looks just as old-fashioned as the rumors."
Back Story sped up along the main road. "We're here! Let's get David all fixed so we can focus on the game."
“Our first stop is the Tea Room,” Gloomy led the way, “We have pachinko, skee ball, and pinball wall to wall. Alphabittle knows everypony, and everypony owes him a favor. If anyone in Bridlewood can help, he’ll know who they are.”
“Boss pony is a bit rough around the edges… and he’s ginormous…” Ragdoll rolled a foreleg in a noodly fashion. “But he’s good ponies. He comes off as a bully, but he respects if you stand up to him.”
David rapped the disc much as he had Gloomy before. "Machines loaded up." The disc followed him since he gave the signal. "Probably best to…" A pause came without asking. "Unload!" Yeah, that was the word. "We should unload the machines first."
“Hey boss man! We’re home! Could use some help unloading!” Ragdoll shouted from his perch as Gloomy walked into the Tea Room.
“You’ve got the Evermarsh consoles?!?!” An excited blue unicorn colt ran forward. “Just like they got in Maretime bay?!?!”
“That’s right kid,” the doll replied with a noodle wave, “The Crystal Tea Room now has real assed vidja games.”
“Back already?” A truly gigantic pale gray horse of a unicorn strode forward with a cocky smile. “I figured you two would milk this for at least a full week?”
“There was an unexpected medical emergency.” Gloomy explained tonelessly.
Back Story nudged David to the side. "Speaking of that, we have to go. Hay, do you know where the local healing wizards are? Tell me you have healing wizards."
"I don't think anypony actually knows." Joypad squinted at the great slab of unicorn. "Except the unicorns know at best. So, where are they?"
“Healing… wizards?” Alphabittal did a slow blink. “Also… is that a gorrilla? I thought they would be more furry… but what do I know?”
Back Story spread her wings to conceal the human behind her back. "Ha Ha, caught us. Thank you." She nudged back at David as she backpedaled, almost tripping over him before they both got moving.
"Dang it…" Joypad moved alongside Back. "I didn't think a unicorn would not know what a wizard was. What do we do?!"
Ragdoll heaved a heavy sigh. “A doctor. They need a doctor that uses magic to do doctor things. And David’s a human, boss, not a gorilla…”
And there was David, caught in the middle of everything. "Let's not get worked up. He's just a random unicorn. So he doesn't know a random thing, not the end of the, uh, world or anything."
“I mean we have doctors, are you hurt? Nurse Rhinestone is right over there playing pinball…” Alphabittle shuffled his massive hooves. “I’m just not sure what’s going on…”
Joypad's retreat stopped immediately as she twisted. "Where?! Wait, not a nurse." She skewed an ear off to the side. "We're talking long term icky bad things, not a quick 'ouch I cut something' or 'Ow, I broke a thing.'"
"It's complicated." Back was still facing him, just stopping her retreat. "So if you know any medical doctors?"
"With magic!" Joy flashed a great and hopeful smile. "Please."
“So you’re ‘hoomun’ friend has a disease, and you need medicine?” Alphabitle spoke very slowly and deliberately.
Back bobbed her head. "Yeah, a disease, but… I don't know. Maybe unicorn medicine is different than pegasus magic and will perk him right up. Who do we talk to?"
"Please." Joy was still smiling, eyes shining with that hope she refused to let go of.
“Well alright then,” Alphabittle replied with a smile, “You need to call on Dr. Feel Good…”
“He’s the that’ll make you feel alright,” Gloomy interrupted. Ragdoll looked straight at David. “What?”
Back still trapped David behind the concealing fathers of a pegasus. Not this stopped him from brushing a few protective feathers aside to get a peek. "Sorry about all this. They are very protective. I feel a bit… honored? It's nice that they care so much."
Back casually bapped David across his face with her wings. "Stop acting like we're not saving your life. So where's the doctor?"
The giant directed his attention directly on the partially concealed human. “Is this actually an emergency? I can get you in to see the doc in the morning when he opens his office, no problem. If you need immediate care I can call in some favors. But keep in mind, you are going to owe me some favors.”
Joy looked back to David, who was running where he had been smacked with feathers. It hadn't been a very strong hit, but he took offense from the frown on his face. "David, sorry, not trying to start anything, but we are trying to help you."
That caught his attention quickly enough. "I won't suddenly die if we have to wait a night. I've waited this'ong." The letters slurred together just a little without his say so. "No reason to kick up a fuss."
“Nurse Rhinestone!” Alphabittle called out. “I need a hoof here. Somepony go get Doctor Feel Good. This man needs his meds!”
"Man?" A nurse looked up from her game to see the ponies and their strange non-pony guest. "O-Oh! Well, um, this way." She abandoned her game and got to a firm trot towards the door. "This way." Once spurred, nothing seemed able to get her to slow back down.
Rhinestone led them quickly to a small building not far from where they started. "Doctor? Doctor?" she called out as she waved for the others to follow her. "We have a very sick creature that needs your help."
"A creature?" A new unicorn stepped into view. His gaze was penetrating and judging. Quite sharply, he saw the one non-pony that could qualify. "He's standing and moving on his own."
David waved as he came up to the counter to lean on lightly. "What I have doesn't kill quickly. My speech… will slow? I may get wheelchair-ridden eventually and stop moving much."
The doctor inclined his head. "Did you eat something that didn't agree with you?"
"I wish it was that simple." His left hand waved but bumped into Joypad, who was a valid petting target and didn't avoid the attention. "My immune system is busy feasting on the shells around my nerves, which makes them not work. Last I looked, which was a while ago, it was up here and down here, all along." He pointed up to his head and trailed a path down his spine. "Got any magic for that?"
Doctor Feel Good tapped at his chin thoughtfully. "So the symptoms are persistent and include gradual onset of physical impairment. I can work with that.” Doctor Feel Good nodded and jotted illegible nonsense on his paper notepad. “Are there secondary symptoms? Please describe them as fully as possible. I can’t make medicine to make you feel alright unless I know exactly what’s happening and how it makes you feel bad.”
David hiked a brow, a talent he had worked for months to get right. "Well sure. Going to the bathroom isn't easy more than half the time." That got a squint from the pony next to him. "Tingling on the right side of my body, and…" He hummed with thought. "A headache that's only gotten worse. Pretty sure they're all related. And you have no idea what I'm talking about, do you?"
Back's wings flared out. "Hey hey, calm down. We went to a doctor for a reason." She flashed a bright smile at Dr. Feel Good. "You know what he's talking about, right?"
“Alright, so you need a medicine that will at least hold back physical impairment, take care of a headache, make specifically your right side of your body less tingly, and help you evacuate your wastes… #1, #2, or both?”
David's expression became less happy. "You're treating symptoms. You can solve all the symptoms and I'm still going to go invalid." He squeezed the top of back, scrunching the skin over her spine as he leaned over her a little. "I appreciate it, really. But it doesn't sound like a fix."
Joypad took a measured step forward to not knock over the human leaning on her. "We'll take the bathroom stuff anyway. And the headache cure! Better than nothing."
“There is one more option.” Feel Good pranced nervously. “I have a medicine I’ve developed since magic came back… I haven’t tested it… but it’s only been formulated for unicorns. The idea is that a total transmogrification will override any existing ailment. If it works… well it’s going to turn you into a pony. I’m making it for cases like yours. Cases where I can only treat the symptoms.”
Back clapped her hooves to her cheeks. "Our human!"
Joypad swatted at the panicked pegasus. "Our human isn't much good if they become a dead human, or a human in a wheelchair?" She looked over her shoulder. "How… uh… deadly is this, if you don't mind?"
David released Joypad to lean against the counter in full. "Not that deadly, from what I hear. It's one of those 'wish you were dead' diseases, eventually." He leaned back to discover there was nothing behind him and he casually toppled over to the floor in an ungainly display. "Dang it." He sat up, but slowly. "I thought this would… Did it get worse for you?"
That sounds pretty out of character.
"You wouldn't be bringing this up if everything was working out great." David snorted at the floating letters. "Unless this is the drama you thought up?"
Pretty good drama, you have to admit.
"Thanks, I hate it." Glancing around, he could see the others were stuck in time. No need for that while he conversed with the Text. "It's not that I hate the idea of being a pony. It was pretty nice last time."
But.
"I thought I'd stick to humanity longer this time." David clenched his left hand. "I thought I'd stick to it the whole time."
You knew the problems before you got here.
The letters began to dance
And you're aware this time, so you can't hide behind ignorance. So what'll it be?
"I don't want a warped childhood."
These ponies live a life you already know. What would you gain doing that? That sounds like agreement.
Life proceeded around David.
“There is a risk, of course. I’ve only made this medicine to work on ponies, specifically only turning ponies of the same tribe into other ponies of the same tribe.” Doctor Feel Good explained. “But I am 100% confident I can make a human safe version. But in the end, it’s your decision.”
Joypad sat down next to the sitting up but still grounded David. "We're not doing anything without your permission." She leaned in with a little smile. "We're only here because of you, idiot. We do nothing without your go ahead."
Back Story settled on the other side of the human. "You are going to become useless for marketing." A little smile spread despite that. "Good thing I don't work in marketing. You'll still answer questions, right?"
David tried to put a hand on either mare, and got neither mare, almost flopping over in a wave of fatigue. "Crap." He managed to right himself. "I'm… glad you're here, both of you. You seem… are. You are nice." He frowned at his seeming lack of vocal skills. "I can't live like this."
In a tiny game cabinet across town a doll screamed. “Do what you will!!!”
“I got your back,” Ragdoll asserted. “You left a square in my mind.”
"Was it a square?" David debated geometric shapes, but not the placing of them, with a moment of squinting. "I'm getting off topic… Our options! Options, right. We try to treat the symptoms." He counted on one finger. "Or we do nothing." Out went a second finger. "Either of those results in paralysis and unfun times, but one is more comfortable about it."
Joypad inclined her head. "Not gonna lie. Those both sound like bad endings and I would return the game with them and hurl it at the vendor. What's the other option?"
“If it works, he becomes a perfectly normal unicorn.” The Doctor assured them.
Back Story clopped her hooves together sharply. "Too easy." She leaned forward at the Doctor with a knowing smile. "If I coded this, or designed it, there's no way you just happen to have the ingredients to a 'mysterious creature to unicorn' potion just lying around. So, where do we have to go?"
Joypad slapped one hoof to a cheek. "Good point. That would be strange. What sort of mysterious mountain top do we have to climb?"
“Ha, ha!” The Doctor guffawed. “Is that how pegasi and earth pony medicine works? No, I have all the ingredients on horn but two, and your biped friend has those. I just need a hair and blood sample and I can have the medicine by morning.”
David raised his hands at his two equine protectors. "Maybe he's full of it, or not. It probably won't kill me, right?"
Joypad thumped David in the chest, just to have to hurriedly get a hoof in the way to make sure he didn't flop over. "That isn't entirely out of bounds. This is a mysterious doctor with sudden solutions to a problem that didn't exist yesterday."
Back Story closed in with a wing raised to block the view. "This isn't something we can test, but maybe he has a point. What's the other option? I want our human as a human, but I'll settle for a human brain in a friendly body." Her ears rolled back. "Oh, what if he goes ahead and makes you some sort of monster?"
“Ahem,” Feelgood cleared his throat, “I’m standing right here. I assure you I am not some kind of mad scientist, nor am I in any way ‘mysterious’. I’ve been practicing medicine in this village for over twenty years. My medicine doesn’t hurt ponies. It doesn’t kill ponies. And it certainly doesn’t turn them into monsters. My one failure was that I couldn’t make a medicine to stop the voices in Gloomy’s head,” the doctor chuckled, “but it turns out that was because her doll was actually talking to her.”
"There is one question." Joypad crossed her hooves, eyes set on David. "What did you mean 'this time?' Was there a first time? Spill the beans! This is hardly the time to be coy about it."
Back's right ear danced. "She has a point, I think. We want to… go ahead with your best interest, so share, please."
That was awkward, to say the least. David rubbed behind his head in thought of the concept. "Where to even start… I wrote a… No…" That made little sense. "I wrote about it, another world, that had ponies, but wasn't quite like this one. The ancient one, the old one?"
Joypad inclined her head. "You wrote about the old pony days, alright? What does that have to do with anything? You're a writer, you write."
Back's eyes shined. "You write? We have even more to go over." She clapped with obvious joy and a big smile. "But first, not dying." She squinted at her current human. "Or going invalid to the point you might not be able to talk much. Is that a common human problem?"
“Sorry we’re late,” Ragdoll waved from his perch on Gloomy’s beret, “Had to deal with work things. Can the Doc help?”
“He’s really a very good doctor,” Gloomy said with a bored expression, without the slightest hint of irony, “He invented my antidepressants. I owe my sunny disposition to Doctor Feelgood.”
The idea united Pegasus and earth pony in looks of disbelief that Gloomy once had a more subdued option. Joypad turned to the doctor fully. "So, this thing. You haven't tried it, right?"
“On ponies… no…” The doctor admitted. “I made an earlier version when magic came back for a foal’s beloved pet that was afflicted with feline leukemia. I had a burst of inspiration that I could use my magic to make my medicine better. Maybe I could do more than treat symptoms and make ponies ‘feel good’. So I made a pill that would turn Baron Flufflepaw into a healthy kitty. He’s an orange tabby, instead of gray, but a perfectly healthy kitty with all his kitty memories of being a loving companion.”
“And he seriously helped Gloomy. Since she was a filly, I always told her to trust the doc. He ain’t never steered us wrong.” Ragdoll nodded solemnly. “The ‘voices in her head’ thing were kinda my fault…”
“I made the unicorn version of the medicine for a filly named Blue Skies.” The doctor sighed. “She has a lung disease. I can make medicine to treat the symptoms, but she’ll never not need the medicine, and eventually she’ll need stronger medicine. I’ve honestly been waiting for an adult unicorn to try it before I give it to a foal…”
"I'm an adult." David sounded as if he was at least partially joking with the statement.
Joypad placed a hoof over her face. "This can only end up badly." But that turned into an annoyed grunt. "But what's the other option?!"
"Not many." Back flumped onto her belly with an agitated swish of her tail. "There's no backsies, huh?"
“To make a human version, I would need a healthy human subject.” The doctor blew an errant bang out from in front of his eyes. “We are lacking in those.”
"Alright, fine." David leaned against Joypad on the way to turn around. "We'll be back tomorrow when you're ready. Oh, thanks, really. Not trying to come across as an ingrate on the way."
Back Story took up his other side with one wing offering a third point of support. "Let's get you somewhere soft to sit down, hm?"
“You’re far from my first prickly patient.” The doctor smiled. “There’s no charge of course. You’re doing this community, not to mention Unicorn Medicine as a whole a great service, sir.”
“You’re welcome to stay at our cottage.” Gloomy Sonnet offered with enthusiasm of sharing a bag of her third favorite potato chip.
“Yeah, we got a guest room for when Gloomy’s parents never come visit.” Ragdoll nodded enthusiastically. “And a couch. So that’s two extra beds and a couch. Her parents are weird, don’t ask.”
"Huh." David did not hide that this raised more questions very well. "Onwards." With the support he had, he made it to the safe place without much difficulty. Though he headed first for the couch, he was intercepted by two frowning ponies and guided instead to the bed. "Alright."
"Yes, alright." Joypad snorted softly. "They don't warn near often enough on the challenges of keeping an eye on a graymane."
"Huh." Back squinted at David appraisingly. "He is kinda gray… I thought that was something of a pet name and never really looked."
“Charlie…” The gray mare pawed the floor with a hoof nervously. “I know you like having your own bed now that… Can we have doll cuddles like old times? After what we did tonight…” Her voice dropped to a whispered hush. “I’m afraid those words are going to take you away…”
"What are you two whispering about?" Joypad emerged with Back Story behind her. David had been abandoned to his new bed. "Something we should know, or specifically not know?"
Ragdoll heaved a heavy sigh, despite his complete lack of lungs. “I ain’t gonna lie. We laid a jinx before we ever ran into you to find someone who could test the medicine. The filly who needs it is a regular at the tea room. When the path led to David… we pushed to try and make sure it would work. And truth is, we pushed something way bigger than we had any business pushing. And it’s gonna push back.”
“To win there’s a cost.” Gloomy tapped a rhythm with her hooves. “Something might be lost.”
Joypad leveled a hoof at the doll, but Back Story came in before she could speak. "Is this a human thing? Is this human magic?! Tell me!" Her wings were mostly unfolded, eyes sparkling with curiosity.
"This is what you focus on?" Joypad chuckled at her eager new friend.
“You’re not… wrong?” Ragdoll shrugged, fixating his vacant button eyes on Back Story. “Does your ‘classical’ mythology even talk about words that meddle in ponies’ and humans’ lives? I’m not sure how else to describe it…”
"I have no idea what you're talking about." Back leaned in all the closer. "Which is why I want you to explain nice and slowly for me." She sank to her haunches in front of him. "Start with the basics. Assume I'm five and don't know anything. Tell me a story!"
“All the world is stories, Miss.” Ragdoll sighed. “Pretty sure every world is all stories. And all the stories are just made of words. We normally can’t see it because we’re right down in it. We’re the words living in the story, do you follow me so far?”
Back inclined her head. "Just to remind, I am a background narrative writer. It's my job to help bring worlds to life for others to live in, half the time other writers." She flashed a big grin. "So you're preaching to the choir there! What, waiting to spring the 'this is a story too!' on me? Maybe, but I ask, does it matter? I vote not so much. Now spill the story!"
“Okay so we’re on the same page.” The doll nodded solemnly. “You’re a writer, and it’s safe assume you’ve first walled you characters… at least twice?”
"Walled?" She lifted both hooves in a grand shrug. "I said pretend I was five."
“Have you ever tried to talk to your own characters, in the narrative you were writing?” Ragdoll Charlie asked plainly.
"Oh! Right. See… It's my job to... " Joypad poked at her. "What?! Ugh… alright, maybe once or twice." She colored with the admission. "When I got stuck."
“Did they ever talk back? Try to bargain with you?” The doll's sewn on smile was as impassively cheerful as ever.
"I've pretended they did, but if you mean did one, like, stick their head out of the page and yell at me, not yet." She snorted softly. "Pretty sure I'd have to go to the loony bin." A new thought came. "Not sure they have that. Where do they send ponies like that?"
“They send us to doctors.” Gloomy droned tonelessly. “To give us medicine that makes us feel good… or at least better.”
“Thing is, they don’t poke their head out of the page, Miss Story.” Ragdoll's tone was level and stern. “They just see you the same way you see them. As words.”
Joypad offered Gloomy friendly pats without words, watching the two others trade words.
Back Story inclined an ear. "Alright, we're getting somewhere. So… this jinx? A human spell?"
“Again, not entirely wrong.” Ragdoll nodded. “Humans were brought into this world by the Text. Their writers in the next layer up from the story. They make a deal of sorts with the Text to come to Equestria. Thus the writer is paying attention to them. This can be good or bad, given that the writer isn’t worried as much about your well being as they are in making an interesting story. Do you follow? The jinx is kinda me and Gloomy using that with her special talent for controlling the rhythm. We normally play it out like we’re telling fortunes in the tea room.”
Back waggled a hoof at the doll. "I don't mean to pick at your religion, but this sounds like a religion. It's easy to put faith in higher powers, especially with such big stakes. Got any physical proof of your god, or do I have to take them on faith?"
The gray unicorn passively filled a shot glass with bitter ale. Handing it off to Back Story. “You have to give it to Charlie yourself. The Text imposes its own price. Are you sure you really want to see the words behind the wall?”
Back raised a brow. "Uh. This is your god. Again, not trying to disrespect! If they want to say hey, go for it. That'd be kind of cool. I'm an atheist though." She shrugged softly. "The universe is exactly as mysterious as we allow it to be."
“It’s not a god.” Gloomy responds with the straightest of faces. “It’s words. You asked to be shown.”
“I know it’s ritualistic, but it’s how it works.” Ragdoll shrugged. “I blame unicorn magic. What?!?! Dammit Gloomy don’t look at me that way, we both know the superstitious parts are probably unicorn magic!”
Back rolled her hooves over one another. "Okay, great. I can do rituals. Grand Text of Ragdoll, speak to me in your silent verbiage! Spook me with your sternly written font choice!" That she wasn't taking it entirely seriously was not concealed.
Rag doll dunked his head into the offered glass as Gloomy tapped a very precise rhythm with her hooves, dancing in place. “You wanted to see. You didn’t even ask the cost.”
Gloomy began her chant, “Wing, Feather, Mayonnaise, around the corner magic’s made…”
Back inclined her head left and right. She fished out a pouch and set it down, digging out a shiny coin from within it and setting it down. "Ta da! Price is paid." Her logic was unassailable!
The world exploded into words. Back Story was no longer a pegasus game writer, she was a description of a pegasus writer being described standing in a vague description of a two bedroom cottage. The world was a void filled with nothing but words. But suddenly certain words stood out, as if written on a wall…
But she was not aware of this. She was sitting there, waiting for something to happen. In this nothing, other words appeared, not that she could see them.
It is not in her plan to see her god. At least this one. Maybe some other one? I can't rule that out. My rule is simple. Only the human interacts with me.
Your Text said “No.” But then he basically gave me permission to play around. Can’t make deals. You are not one of mine…
"So when does something happen?" Back Story pouted a little. "I was hoping you'd at least do some scary whispers or something."
I'm right here. You know that, right? She's mine, not yours. I'm not giving her to you. I tend to lose ponies that way.
That happened ONCE!
Once is quite enough. She is not an imported human. This is her world. She has no need to see us, or speak to us.
"Seriously, nothing. I'm calling backsies." She slid her given coin back to herself. "Alright, I think I get it though. Human religion! That's cool."
Fine, don’t be fun! But mine still made a deal.
Ragdoll was suddenly gone. Gloomy screamed, tapping her hooves maddly, only to reappear as if skipping frames without actually disappearing and fell to the floor in a sobbing inconsolable mess.
Back slid the coin back with a nervous laugh. "Um… you can… keep it if it means that much to you." She drew her hoof away from it. "Didn't mean to upset you, really."
"Hey." Joypad was squinting at the spot Ragdoll had been in. "Where's the doll? Gloomy… Where's the doll?"
“The words…” Gloomy’s voice was barely above a sobbing whisper. “We pushed the words, and they pushed back. They took him away from me!”
Back nudged the coin forward an inch. "I said they could take it back. Why are they punishing not-me? Strike me down, oh vengeful gods!" But no lightning bolt came to smite the heathenous pegasus.
Joypad let out a hissing breath. "I am so lost… Gloomy, pull yourself together, and tell us what happened. In Ponish, kindly."
“We make deals…” Gloomy explained between sobs. “...With the story we’re in. There’s always a cost, but my jinx always made sure the price fell on the pony we made the deal with. When Blue Sky came to us asking for a deal for her medicine, Charlie said he’d pay the price. We didn’t know the path would lead to his friend testing the medicine. So we pushed the words… but your words were from a different story…”
Joypad rubbed behind her head with growing confusion. "Alright… This evening has only gotten more confusing by the second. I motion we're all wigged out, so how about we have something to eat and approach this like grown ponies, maybe with a snack or something."
“I have things for salad in the fridge.” Gloomy intoned tonelessly. “And Peanut butter. He swore he could taste it. We… I have food.”
I told you at the start this was the price. Don’t make that face at me. You took on the story and you won a point.
This is just what that costs.
“So salad and peanut butter crackers is okay with everypony? Because I also have crackers.” Gloomy recited like a bored child reading shakespeare.
I can’t even tell if you can hear me?
“I also have canned fish salad. From Maritime bay” Something approaching a smile appeared on her face. “With Mayonnaise.”
Beep Boop?
“We really do just need to sit down and talk.” An unnatural upturn came onto Gloomy’s lips that day…
Joypad nudged against Gloomy gently. "C'mon. I know you're not feeling good right now." She wondered how she ended up with a pegasus and a unicorn. Was that the natural unit for ponies, with nothing in the way?
Back at the clinic, the nurse casually bopped the good doctor on the head. "Why were you acting like that?!"
"Acting like what?" He rubbed where she had struck him. "I was completely professional."
She rolled her eyes. "We don't charge for what we do, anyway. Why did you pretend like we were doing them a favor?"
He crossed his arms. "Look, it just increases the odds that they'll come back, that's all. I wouldn't dream of charging them, you know that."
"Of course I know that." She glared at him with renewed energy. "Which is why I don't like it. Be honest with patients."
"Right right…"
Gloomy yawned heavily as her head hit the pillow. It had been a long day. She had won, she and Charlie had challenged fate and not-lost. But she needed to sleep. She needed her doll, and he was out there somewhere in the wide world, flopping around in the dark again. Trying to figure out if he was blind. And she had to sleep alone. Without him even in her room. Her anxiety blossomed like a sickly flower… who would tell her it was only a dream? It was going to be a long night.
The next morning found the one with the least legs up the first. He was casually grabbing things out of the fridge, but not to eat himself, but putting together something as he hummed to himself a nameless beat about an athletic elf that would save the world from aggressive pottery..
“You don’t even know he’s gone?” Gloomy wasn’t stating a fact as much as making an accusation at the cheerful human who had no reason to doubt that all was right with the world as she walked in.
"Hm? Morning." He threw something on the stove with a fresh sizzle of cooking… something. "You had some frozen stuff in there. I think it's hash browns? I assume you like it. Cooking up a batch for you and the others." For all his troubles the day before, he showed no signs of it as he dusted the concoction with some spices. "Want me to check for drinks?"
“He respected you a lot, just so you know.” Gloomy walked almost in a trance to her ice box, removing a bottle of bitter ale and two small glasses. “I could never see what he saw in this stuff. Charlie, I mean…” Gloomy’s voice hitched sharply. “It tastes like stale bread and it’s thick as mud.”
"What's up with Kai?" David glanced from where he was cooking, but saw no doll about. "Does he… eat? If so, what?" Having slumbered through it, he lived along with ignorance. "And I'm guessing that's not a random fruit drink." Clearly, he hadn't looked at it very hard.
“Does he eat? He doesn’t even have a real mouth!” Gloomy screamed at the only target her rage could see. “He’s gone! He’s lost out there. And I don’t even know where he is!” The mare tossed back her drink. “I hope it was worth it…”
"And you lost me." He swirled breakfast with a videogamey noise to accompany it. "Did he wander off? What for? You two didn't get into a fight, right? Crap, wasn't about me, was it? I can get out of the way."
“The text took him… we pushed too hard. We pushed too far…” The young gray mare poured herself a second glass as she spoke absently.
"Wait, what?" He poured what he had made out onto a ready plate, scraping as much of it off the pan as he could. He got water into it with some splashes to let it soak. "Why are you arguing with the Text?" Not all humans were as aware as he was. Most weren't. He wasn't thinking of that. "Arguing with it feels like a waste of time."
“Charlie had an ‘in’.” Gloomy explained. “I could force the rhythm. A filly needed her medicine tested, so we pushed. Because it was you testing, Charlie pushed again. We forced the deal.”
“I still have jinx in play, but without Charlie I’m playing blind to a deaf audience,” Gloomy sighed heavily.
Not me. Must be their other Text. Writing with another Text around makes things odd, but here we are.
"Here we are," echoed David. "Sorry." Still, that told him things… "You're involved with a different Text." He grabbed a small plate and pointed at it with a fork. "Want some? You should get something in there besides that, even if you're upset, for good reason."
“I don’t know what charlie ate… when he could still eat, is this something he liked?” Gloomy sighed before turning her attention to the words.
“I can see you.” Gloomy glared at the space the words occupied. “Just tell me where to look.”
I’m not taking anything. I’m giving you the chance to find out, “Who is Gloomy Sonnet without her doll?”
Oh, you're here? Figured you'd be with them. Oh, no, that wouldn't make much sense. She isn't mine. But she is here. Why did you make her see us? That only makes her miserable.
"Pretty sure he likes that." David brought over a small plate towards Gloomy. "Here. You should get something in you, even if you're not super feeling it." Not that he had eaten any of his own food.
I didn’t make her do anything. THEY bushwhacked ME. And then she… that one right there, tried to force the narrative with a musical number. Against ME. A musical number, dude, you should have seen it. I was proud. I had to step up my game yo.
Not even for the first time. Pinkie did that to me.
"I remember that." David waggled the plate at Gloomy, not at all bothered by his Text's presence. "That was a good story, even if it got dated with time. So many saidisms."
"I smell something good." Joypad was entering with Back Story a few steps behind. "You must be feeling better." Joypad hurried up to get a plate of what her talented human had prepared. "Are you feeling better?"
"He has to be, I think?" Back peered suspiciously, but grabbed a plate for herself. "Don't push yourself, but thanks, it smells great."
“Yes.” Gloomy looked up from her breakfast and scowled in a rare display of earnest emotion. “Your friend is still here and feeling better. David cooked breakfast. There’s also juice in the fridge. And bitter ale. It goes surprisingly well with hash browns…”
David hiked a brow as he set the dirty dishes aside. He grabbed a little of the hash browns himself, literally, just snatching some right off the cooled pan and stuffing it in his mouth with a literal "nom" of a sound along the way. "The ale? Thanks but nah. I'm alright."
Joypad did not look convinced. "You said it comes and goes… Glad you're in a good swing, but we still have to deal with the issue, or accept the consequences, which I'm not ready to do!" She stomped a hoof on the floor, then glanced at Gloomy. "Not to shrink your thing. I'm still confused about that."
“So long as the medicine works, we won.” Gloomy stated as if it might as well have been her opinion on the quality of her chosen breakfast beverage. “I am sorry that I am a mess this morning.”
"Got a good reason to be." David snatched one more bit before he put the pan away where it could be reached for additional treats. "So, you deserve some answers."
"Please." Back Story grinned at David with her attention entirely captured. "What can you tell us?"
"It's complicated…" And he didn't want to wreck their world views. "But I've written about this sort of thing before. So far as I can tell, I'm living that out, but that's a me problem, not a you problem."
Joypad hiked a brow, much as David had done. "Pretty sure it's a me problem right now."
“It’s an ‘us’ problem,” Gloomy nearly growled. “Everypony here had a hoof in this. We all made deals to get here. We are going to win this!” The normally taciturn unicorn downed her drink and proclaimed. “Like that mongoose that defended his unicorn family from those cobras.”
David blinked. "But… That is a human story, not a pony one, I think? Is that a shared story? Neat if so."
Back clopped her hooves together. "Or did you hear it from your human?"
“Rikki Tikki Tavvy?” Gloomy Sonnet blinked in confusion. “The story with the mongoose? We are all talking about the same story, right?”
David nodded as he sat near the other ponies, taking his time getting to the floor with a soft grunt. "That's the one, but you avoided the answer. Did you hear that from Kai, or is that a pony story? That the name is the same makes it being from him even more likely."
“I don’t know, and I doubt he does either, whatever he says otherwise.” Gloomy confessed with a scowl. “We tell each other stories. Did he tell me that one, or did I tell him? It bothers me that he didn’t ask me this before this started.”
That seemed to settle the issue. A cross-universe story it was not, just shared between friends. That was good enough, right? With breakfast devoured, Joypad was peering at David. "So you've told this story, about visiting Equestria, the old one, before… things… But you don't know a damn thing about the new ages."
Back was practically vibrating with excitement. "In your last one, you became a pony, which you were alright with. Were you a… What kind of pony were you?"
Joy raised a brow. "Does it matter? This is his, you know, everything. What do you want, David? We're here for that."
Gloomy followed along with the group in a despondent daze, watching, listening but responding in little more than non-committal hums.
David waved a lone finger towards the quiet Gloomy. "One of her, actually. A little unicorn pony. Learned magic and everything, but that was a story. I wasn't actually a unicorn, just writing about what could happen if it happened. Wow… that was an older me. A different place and a different time."
“Charlie used to talk like that.” Gloomy’s posture slumped notably. “Like it all happens in layers…”
"Don't know about 'layers', but that sounds like something he'd say. But back to… present, the present." He had done so well to avoid any trips for a while. "Seriously, I'm not actually attached to the physical me. I have more things going wrong than going right, so whatever."
Joypad inclined her head slowly. "Dude. You were acting like everything was fine. And now you're not? What happened?"
"I faked it." He shrugged softly with his palms turned up. "Pains don't always have to be shared, especially with people I was still learning. You had a business to run, and I was helping. Complaining a lot doesn't help."
Back scribbled in a pad with a pen held in a wing. "Until it all fell apart, and we arrived at this point."
“We are that this point.” Gloomy agreed. She tapped a catchy little beat with her hooves. “We’ve done what we’re able. We’ve tilted the table. Next move, win or lose, it’s just yours to choose.”
"It's a crappy decision." David leaned back and discovered there was nothing behind him, allowing him to flop backwards with a defeated digital noise. "This is so stupid. Whatever the future is." He was lying on his back as this came out. "I don't want this. This sucks."
“We are going to see the doctor, David.” Gloomy pulled the floppy human onto her back in her magical grip. “If he is not open yet, I will knock harder. This needs to be done.”
With the support of the ponies present, David got back to his feet, and they all headed out. "This is both exciting and terrible." Back squinted suddenly. "Huh, come to think of it, that's most exciting things past 'free ice cream!'"
Joypad looked sideways at the other mare helping things along. "You are something else… I heard… That's hurtful, sorry."
"Well, now I'm curious." Back moved in as far as she could, trapping David between them. "What do they say?"
"This is from the before times." Joypad slapped a hoof over her face. "But I heard pegasi were warriors to the last, all tough and strong. You are so not that."
Old stereotypes aside, they had a doctor to visit.
"There is a little problem." The Doctor had them all in his room, with David up on the patient's table. "As I mentioned before, we have no healthy samples of your species around. I will want some though. We don't want to just roll the dice and hope you come out as something we like."
David had been, er, written about being a unicorn before… "A unicorn wouldn't be the end of the world."
"Actually!" He drew out a pill from nowhere. "I had a feeling you'd be back, so I went and made one ahead of time, to be ready."
“We had a deal.” Gloomy counted three walls and spoke to the fourth. “You’re a good doctor, Doctor Feel Good. And my jinx is still in play. We all played our part to get here…”
Gloomy tapped her hooves in a furious rhythm. “We had two deals. The first was to get Blue Sky’s medicine tested. The second was to make sure it would work.” She turned on the only biped in the room. “The price has been paid, the path has been laid. It’s all up to you, so what do you do?”
The pill floated up where David could easily snatch it up. When a cup of water floated up beside it, he held up a hand. "Never needed water for a pill before, I won't start now." And in the pill went. He wetted it with his saliva in an idle swish before gulping it down as it was, proving he was still capable of devouring a pill without the help of water. "How quickly does it work?"
"The cat began its healing in… ten minutes, but you are quite a bit larger."
Back rubbed her hooves nervously. "I'm really sad we're losing our human. You were a nice looking human, for a human. Um… Were you a nice looking human?" It hit her, perhaps late, that she was no judge on human aesthetics.
“He’s still going to be a human.” Gloomy looked up with general disinterest. “Just like Charlie. Only the outside changes. He taught me these rules.”
Joypad nodded in firm agreement. "If he wasn't, he wouldn't be our David."
"That's true." Back worried her hooves together. "I must sound so rude, or just selfish, which is rude… I have so many questions. Be healthy!"
"Doing my best." There wasn't much for him to do, except… "Shoot." He put one sneaker against the other and easily kicked it off, repeating with his foot to get the other off. Without saying why, he casually slipped off his socks and tossed them onto the sneakers in an ungainly pile.
“100% of all of your clothes are about to become very awkward.” Her prophecy of fashion doom rang out with the rhythmic shuffling of her little gray unicorn hooves.
There was a reason he got rid of his sneakers, becoming visible as his feet curled on themselves to a painful edge that had him rubbing in the search of comfort. "Dang it." But there was no alleviating the contraction that only grew in intensity as his many toes became one large toe that was capable of supporting him on a dense hoof that was all of his nails combined and fortified for the task. "Huh…" As hooves went, a perfectly suitable set of them at the end of his still bipedal legs.
Back grunted. "When do we know, for sure, you're fixed?"
“The transformation doesn’t have to be complete to cure the condition.” Gloomy shuffled nervously. “We only specified the medicine had to work. The end form never even came up. That was part of the cost. Charlie said he didn’t care what it cost.”
Where there was a hoof, there was fur. A hoof without fur? That just looked odd. David scratched lightly at where it itched with so many hairs growing in thicker suddenly. "I am really sorry, but do you have… a snack?"
Doctor Feelgood let out a thoughtful hum. "I think it's supposed to just use what's there. Are you eating properly?" Despite his complaints, he got a jar of nuts with his magic and brought it over. "These are healthy for your species, I hope?"
"Wow, great." David grabbed the jar and was soon munching on the collection of assorted nuts. "Actually, one of my favorite snacks, so good job there." Mmm, cashew, peanuts, and other nuts beside. David lost track of the itch on the path to devouring the nuts.
There was the ringing noise of an artificial bell, breaking Gloomy’s rhythm, as she pulled her phone out of her pocket to see she had received a text message.
"Did you keep your phone?" David dug out his phone, gained from Zephyr Heights. A quick swipe unlocked it. "It gets service out here?" The fur swept up along either leg, only visible at first as he scratched up along it. "Oh!" He glanced left and right. "Can I use your bathroom?" And off he went, scurrying for privacy, or trying. His progress was quite slow as he found out that hooves did not work exactly the same as feet.
Gloomy’s monotone took on recognizable emotion as she read the text message out loud, as David thrashed about in mid pony transformation.
From: LadyBugWaifu73@PippSqueakUnderGround.pon
To: BeatMistressGloomster@PegaSoft.pon
Don’t worry, my brothers found your doll. He’s fine. Things are complicated right now, but I promise we’re going to return him to you as soon as possible. In the meantime, don’t worry. He’s safe and I promise I’ll take good care of him until we can get him back to you. I know this is gonna be super suspicious but I have to delete this account as soon as I send this. So you have no way to get back in touch with me. Sorry about that.
Love, Luck, and Polypropylene Fellow-And/Or-Future Pippsqueak,
Lady Bug Waifu, Crowned Princess of Cuddle Muffins
Out of sight, David closed the door to the bathroom carefully with barely a sound. He wriggled out of his pants and kicked off his boxers into an uneven pile. "Ah…" He confirmed that the fur had spread up to cover his hips, and brought other changes with it. He was a horse all the way up to a bit under his belly button. "Hm…" He twisted, grabbing the wall for support as he got a look at his back end. Yep… Just as he had suspected.
He had a tail growing in right where it belonged, or didn't belong. But the fur wasn't pressing upwards. He was half a horse. "This happened last time too," he grumbled to himself, not nearly as upset about it as, perhaps, he should have been.
Back Cover raised a hoof beside her snout. "Everything coming out alright in there?"
Joy bonked her new friend. "Did you forget the laundry list of issues? That question is… really rude."
"Huh?" It was only then that the potential meaning dawned on Back and she colored. "Nevermind!"
“Charlie taught me to ask two questions.” Gloomy made a little not-smirk. “‘Did it work?’ and ‘What went wrong?’”
Joy looked over at Gloomy's words. "Are you asking me, or answering? I don't know yet… But he hasn't screamed in agony… So?" Her eyes went to the doctor. "When do we know for sure?"
"When he reports he feels better, and he stays that way. Oh, and we're sure what kind of pony he is. I might have tried something."
Back threw up a hoof. "You were supposed to test it!"
"And I did. Your human is a very willing test subject." He nodded as if that was just a normal thing.
“A willing test subject…. Doctor?” Gloomy smiled. “Like I was?”
In the bathroom, David slipped his boxers back up as far as they could go with his new tail coming in. "You're a cute little thing." A small limb that twitched when he felt it, with fur that was growing thicker by the moment. He grabbed his pants and stepped into them. "And you're going to work even less… He pulled them up anyway, leaving the tail mooshed to the side within them. "Best I got…"
But then came the headache, a hand going to his forehead as he clenched his teeth. Not the first headache he had by far. He was fairly used to grinning and bearing such things, not even looking for painkillers. He waited patiently for it to pass as he breathed a little harder.
Damp? He drew his hand away to see blood on it and he almost fell over in surprise. "The heck?" He wheeled on the mirror in the room and saw blood was oozing down his face in a garish display as something new was poking free of the tortured skin. "Oh damn it… That… is a bad look."
Joy perked an ear. "I hear you moving around in there. If you're having any trouble, you just have to ask." She didn't move towards the bathroom, the shout was apparently enough.
“What did you do, Doctor?” Gloomy tapped a bitter rhythm and scowled. “I know what me and Charlie did, and that’s bad enough, What. Did. You. Do?”
"No need to look at me that way." The doctor of a unicorn adjusted his front with pats of his hooves. "He seemed very indecisive, so I went with his thing. You all were here, wanting to help him, so… his pill uses all of you as samples."
Joy and Back's jaws fell open, gaping at the doctor's words.
“You are a bad doctor, and I am embarrassed on Charlie's behalf that he ever trusted you.” Gloomy heaved a heavy sigh. “On the other hoof, it feels good to admit that. You were always wrong.”
"My patient will be right as rain, just you see." Doctor Feelgood waved a magically gripped pen at Gloomy. "Stop being down about it."
In the bathroom, David hissed and grunted, unable to resist a few choice noises of pain. With a wet parting, his headache hit its peak and, mercifully, began to ebb into a dull throbbing. Through the one eye that wasn't coated in blood, he could see he had a bloody horn protruding from his head. "Great…" Was it a good horn? Heck if he knew… At a quick decision, he couldn't decide if he had improved or not as a complete package.
Water could be heard flowing as he dabbed himself and splashed water. "God damn it!" Still open skin didn't like the touch of water, he found out, slowing in his efforts, but becoming cleaner with each careful motion.
“After this you stop, Doctor” Gloomy nearly snarled with unfamiliar emotion.
Joy reached a hoof for Gloomy's shoulder. "Calm down. Dave! You alright?"
"I'm fine." The door swung inwards. David emerged, clenching his hands, and looking a bit odd. Besides having hooves instead of human feet, he had a unicorn's horn jutting from his head. Still mostly human? "I'm alright."
Back Story inclined her head. "Not all alright… You said all three of us. Why's he got a horn and no… everything else?"
"Three of you?" David joined them in the main area of the clinic. "Did I miss something?"
“The doctor used samples from all three tribes” Gloomy explained plainly.
“This is exactly how Charlie told me this works…”
"Oh…" David patted himself down as if checking for something. "Alicorn, not check… But I am speaking straight, so that's a plus. By the way, I have a tail now. I don't mind having a tail, really. It's kind of cute, but these pants are really not made for a tail."
Joy peered at her human(?). "You know, it's alright to be more upset about this."
Back Story hopped to her hooves. "Maybe this is a human thing. A bonus to mental attacks, neat. I would not have guessed that, and it's uncanny to see in the real world instead of ideas on paper or on screen… I have to rethink everything…" She slowly listed to the right. "After I see your tail. You are going to show us that tail, right?"
Gloomy Sonet tapped her hooves in an agitated rhythm. “We made a deal, Dr. Feelgood. Everyone here trusted you, because a sick little filly needed her medicine tested. And you tested the wrong medicine.”
“I told you it was experimental…” The doctor pleaded. “Side effects were always going to be an issue…”
“I am not angry because the medicine had side effects, Doctor Feelgood.” The name rolled off her tongue like a slur as the beat went on. “Somepony still has to test the medicine that turns Blue Sky into a healthy unicorn filly. The deal was made, and the price will be paid.”
"Easy." David raised a hand in front of the agitated mare. "I'm not against keeping my fingers. I look… odd, but no more odd to most ponies than when I started." He was still a monster from another world, if friendly.
Joypad looked between David and the others with mounting confusion. "But… you do feel better, right?"
“The doctor sent his patient to make a deal with us.” Gloomy nearly snarled at David. “She needed the medicine tested, and Charlie paid the Text’s price. What he used on you was not her medicine. The medicine still has to be tested.”
“There’s nopony left to test the original medicine!” The doctor argued.
“I can count to one pony.” Gloomy’s smile was as cold and even as her voice.
Back Story circled around the agitated pony and the doctor that was her source. "Is it too late to test it now?"
Joypad glared at Back. "Who's taking it? David's better now. I'm happy the way I am." She waved at herself. "Earth pony forever! Seriously, you alright?"
David had both of his hands up. "As good as I can imagine, which isn't much. Not like being healthy came with a theme song." He looked like life would be improved if that were the case. "I'm just as fine not tossing out what I was to start. This way is only changing a little bit of it." He looked down at his lack of toes that he could not wriggle. "Hm."
“Well, Doctor,” the gray mares mane fell somehow straighter, “It seems there aren’t any more volunteers. Charlie trusted you… I trusted you… the whole village has always trusted you. And you betrayed that. Take your own medicine. If you want any of us to believe in you, believe in yourself.”
David put a hand in front of the surprised doctor, causing Feelgood to step back away from it. "Calm down. We're not making him do that. He saved me. Crap… It's like the error messages are cleared up." All those many problems, just gone, banished. "Wonder…" He didn't finish that thought. "Don't hurt anyone."
“It’s time to decide and they are on your side.” Gloomy passed a look between her new friends and the doctor. Tapping her hooves. “But the game has been played and the price must be paid. You tested the wrong medicine doctor. And somepony still has to test the right medicine. And all the ponies here agree it shouldn’t be you. So give me the pill.”
"I'm already not a pony." David shrugged lightly. "And not a human. It probably won't mess up my world like it's messing up his from the sound of it, and probably the end of yours.." He elbowed the doctor. "So give it here. I'm already working on borrowed time here." He put out a hand, wriggling the tips of his fingers in a beckoning stance.
“No, we made this deal behind your back.” Gloomy heaves a heavy sigh. “I can rage all I want, but the doctor didn’t cause this. We… I guess it’s just me now. I caused this. You already paid a price you never agreed to. Taking on a heavier load does nothing to balance the scales.”
Joypad crossed her arms. "Why are we debating who takes a pill? What is this even supposed to do anyway? Make a filly? Neither of you are fillies!" She threw her hooves in the air. "You're not even the right one!" She pointed her right hoof at David. "You're an outtie. She's at least an innie, but this is still completely wrong. How young are we even talking?"
“Okay, when you say it like that it makes our medical system look somewhat backwards.” Gloomy admitted, dryly, but we need to know if it works. “The pill he gave David is compromised because it has all our samples in it, It should have been me all along. A medicine that turns a unicorn into a different unicorn… Testing it on Charlie’s friend would never have done that.” She heaved a heavy sigh. “But we did make that deal.”
David shook his head, distracted a brief moment as he remembered he could see his new horn at times. "Can you stop that? What deal?" He crouched down. "Actually, we need to talk, you and me." He pointed at Gloomy and himself. "Can the rest of you wait here?" The others grumbled but seemed willing to allow that.
Gloomy’s ears laid back behind her beret. “We did a lot of things without asking you…”
"That is his style." He didn't sound that upset as he clopped towards the outdoors. "Come on. More talking, less prophesying."
“We meant nothing but good, Mister David.” Sonnet sobbed softly. “A filly from the tea room needed medicine. Charlie thought he could cut a deal with the text…”
David escorted Gloomy outside and leaned against the wall there. "Right, but you've noticed by now? There's more than one of those. A deal with one is not a deal with the other." He pointed at Gloomy. "Which is why mine said knowing about them would just make you sad, which it did. Sorry about that." Not that he was the one responsible. "Keeping that a secret from the others. No need to spread that around."
“Thank you, Mister David, for understanding.” The gray unicorn nodded with purpose and wiped her eyes. “But we did what we did for a reason. And that filly can’t get her medicine until an adult tests it. I’ve already seen the writing between the walls, and I knew there was going to be a cost.”
David tapped the forlorn mare on the nose. "So you have two choices." He put up two fingers from the same hand. "You take it yourself, which is an option, or you talk to the other Text."
This is supposed to be a slice of life exploration of being, not a high magic multiversal romp.
"Blame the other one. She already knows about you." He waved at Gloomy in a passing gesture. "Go ahead, they're listening."
“You are the other one?” Gloomy tapped a nervous, exploratory rhythm. “I’m not used to doing this by myself… I’m sorry?”
You're not mine. I can't do anything to one of yours without their signing off on it, even if that's just going with it. What's up?
"Just ask them." David turned his waving to the air where the words appeared.
They are reunited in the end is the one caveat, whether it’s good for them or not. I separated them for a reason. And I’m invested in that reunion. Other than that, you’ve got a whole CMC trio. I will not stand in the way of that, yo.
"Pretty sure not a single pony on this planet knows what that is." The CMC being unknown years past. "Ask that one." He pointed to where his Text's words floated patiently.
“Charlie showed me the edge of this world… I want to see how far I can walk in it. I want to see who I am past the spooky mare who plays with dolls.” Gloomy steadied herself against a world ready to throw itself at her. “Do I have to say what I’m willing to pay?”
You have to ask for something. Also, you still aren't mine. Being mine would change who you are. I don't mean that in a mystical sort of way. You are an extension of them. David is an extension of me. Being mine is an arm on a new body. What do you want? To grow? You can do that without me.
David was quiet in the exchange, patting his sides and trying to not be there with mixed success. He hummed a videogame song to himself quietly.
“This is your world.” Gloomy closed the distance and leaned in on the human-faun. Personal space be damned. “I took every step because I listened to Charlie. And he said you were important.”
"He's forgotten it." He leaned back from Gloomy as she began to get too close, though the wall behind him didn't let him go very far. "He was a friend, and probably still is? And… that's probably his Text, huh…"
Speaking of that, they got an idea of what should happen to you and didn't bring it up to me?
"What idea?"
You take the pill and poof, unicorn filly. Would have been cute, I bet.
Like you could say no to them… wait… nevermind… you did.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t think how the deals we made were affecting ponies' lives…” Gloomy leaned into the need of a hug.
Which was harder to ignore. He reached gently for her head, ruffling her mane and playing with her ears with a little smile. Ponies were so fun to pet! "That does sound cute…" What he was, less cute? He was a middle aged unicorn pony satyr… "Why always a unicorn?"
You're afraid of the lack of fine motor control? Beats me. A satyr keeps fingers no matter which flavor of pony. Either way, they did not ask me. They just assumed, and I went as I went.
“That’s true, Mister Text.” Gloomy bowed her head in admission. “I don’t think Charlie even knew there were two of you… at least at first. Before last night I had never even seen the world from your side. Can I change which text I can deal with? Is that a thing?”
I just warned you! Are you listening? Becoming part of me means you stop being what you were. An arm attached to a new body will not behave as once it did. Understand that.
"He's getting philosophical." David pushed upright. "But he may have a point."
And you know, even if we allow this, he can’t give you back your doll. I’d doubt that he would if he could. I separated you two for good reasons. Ask anyone in this room, I’ve been exceptionally soft touched with you. And my colleague is far from above kicking his little ponies. I put your doll in a time out. We’ve both done much, much worse.
The doll is his, which is not me. I could give you a doll, but not that specific one. There is a difference, we both know.
“But we paid the price… we went through all the steps…” Gloomy shook her head.
And you think it’s unfair, and you're right. You’re right. It was never fair. I separated you from your beloved ragdoll. And look what you’ve done in just one day. You never knew you could contact us without him, because you never had to. Don’t make a habit of this, by the way.
Oh, now you care? You've already pulled her out of blissful ignorance, but shhh, pretend nothing is here.
"I never heard what the deal… was?" David glanced between the two different texts with their subtle font differences. "What were you going for?"
“A filly came to us to make a deal.” Gloomy closed her eyes tight. “She has a breathing disorder. Dr Feelgood has been treating the symptoms, but that’s really all he could do. Then magic came back and the Doctor had the idea of ‘replacement therapy’. It seems to work, but no adult in the village would test the pill. And the doctor wouldn’t test medicine on a foal. So she came to us. And we made a deal that we would make sure there was a test subject. Charlie took the price. Then the test subject was his friend. So we had to make a second deal, to make sure the medicine would actually cure him.”
David sighed in a long exhale that was longer than needed to empty his lungs. "Yeah… There is a perfect test subject… And it isn't me, unless the filly you're talking about is also an extraplanar not-pony…"
"You're talking to me?" David didn't see anything else around. It was a formless void with a few stars floating in it quietly. Just the words before him and not much else. "No other text? No Gloomy?"
Just you, and me. We need to chat, I think. This has gone a bit off the rails, and I don't have a dream to blame this time.
"It's that bad?" David dusted himself off lightly. "I figured you brought up the MS stuff because it was getting you down. Real to life and all that. Thanks for sharing."
A little of that, but nowhere as bad as you. You were 'enjoying' that first time.
David winced, scrunching his face with the memory. "That was about the worst time."
Here's to never having it again.
"You gave it to me!" He leveled an accusing finger at the words. "Or was that Kai's idea?"
As if he knows me that well. I kept trying to hint and suggest, but only direct statements work. And even those only worked sometimes. Look… We're not above rewinding if we have to. We could do that.
"I wouldn't want to do that, and neither would you, being me." David raised a hoof from the void. "Besides, hooves aren't all bad. His idea?"
Mine. That my idea to not push you onto all fours. It was only afterwards did the whole filly thing come up.
"Still sounds cute, in retrospect… But we'd be telling the same story again, wouldn't we?"
Maybe. That's why I drew you aside. It's time to talk. Do you want this? Do the readers want this? Maybe we should ask them. Not sure who's reading this, but some of them are, pretty sure.
"Gender bent Silver adventures." David let out a merry digital tune of accomplishment. "Not sure if that was the idea. I'm not opposed to the idea."
I know that. God, we're such a mess. You know most guydudes are not alright with this idea, right? Some of them even get violent about it. Some people will storm off and denounce this story on hearing it, guaranteed.
"You were talking about asking them?" He brought two fingers together. "A vote?"
Of the readers. I won't vote.
"Of course… You know, me being aware of this makes complications."
Unless we rewind to the start, that's staying true. You're an updated me. I know how this story works. I like you and Joy and how you got along. So… let's ask. Hey, you, the one reading this! Comment below
"Shouldn't this go in the author's notes?"
No, now shut up. 1. Full speed ahead as we are, pony satyr. 2. Turn David into a filly. 3. All the way pony!
"That sounds kinds bad..."
You're the subject. You get no vote I don't give you. Shut up and let me finish. 4. Turn David back to normal(human), but cured. 5. Turn David back to normal(human), but still with MS.
"That is literally the worst option!"
And you're influencing the vote, stop it. Oh right. 6. What about some other foal? (not unicorn) 7. All the way pony but not unicorn.
"Woah!" David waved his hands wildly. "You're reaching for my fingers."
Shut up, time for them to vote. No time will pass for you. You may even forget we did this. Text interactions are strange. Either way, let's see what they say.
“You're right, Mister David, there always was a perfect test subject.” Gloomy droned. In her peripheral vision, the world of words dissolved.
Only one line fading in Comic Sans remained, “And stay out!”
As the world that buffered the creators from the created faded for the last time she felt an epiphany. “The medicine always needed a unicorn mare to test it. It was always supposed to be me…”
David set a hand on her shoulder. "Look, it may work, or just not, or… something else. Either way, you have friends with you at least. I'm not going anywhere until we're sure and you're alright." He turned the touching hand into a thumbs up. "Ready?"
“We know it works.” Gloomy nodded. “I’m just going to be a filly of an appropriate age to have tea parties with her dolls?” Her smile was unsure and didn’t quite meet her eyes. But it was a resolved smile. “I owe the doctor an apology for my outburst. We… did wrong at every step. He only tailored his medicine to his patient, like he always has…”
"The scientific method could use some work…" Double-blind clinical trials this was a far way from being. "But we're here." He took a clop forward past her. "Do you want to go back there now, or not? Your choice."
“Me and Charlie both made the deal.” The taciturn mare nodded as if she were simply buying camping equipment online. “We pushed and we got what we wanted. The jinx always came with its price…”
"Right." He had no argument for that part. "But, it doesn't mean you have to do it today. So, really, are we going home, or in there?" He pointed in the direction of Gloomy's place with a swishing noise, then back in the clinic with a new swoosh. "I'm alright either way, and following you." He scratched at his butt a moment longer than polite company would allow for.
“We don’t exactly have a time frame.” The young grey mare actually smiled. “We have time to adjust. I have to go back to Zephyr Heights. I already had to do that.”
"That doesn't tell me what we're doing today, uh, besides maybe visit a tailor." He clopped his right hoof, a new noise for him to make, and one that seemed to please him if the clopping he made was any hint. "So which'll it be?"
“Are we actually gonna do a glow up?” Gloomy asked with the straightest face. Because if we are, we gotta get the girls and head over to Zoot Suit’s…”
"They would probably like that." He patted the sides of his altered legs. "I don't need anything fancy, but I have a tail in my pants and I'm pretty sure tails do not belong in there, and it's a tiny bit uncomfortable so maybe we should do something about that, assuming it's in the budget."
"In the budget?" Joypad appeared as if from nowhere at David's side, coming in from behind him. "You made the budget, my strange human person. Pretty sure we can fit in a pair of pants."
"Feeling better then?" Back Story came in on the other side. "That's great! So… I still have questions, and now that you're not dying, we can go over them! After some pants, I hear."
“Charlie has always insisted that pants are optional.” Gloomy sonnet opined in a bored voice. “Honestly he never wore clothes at all, so I thought that was a weird line to draw in the sand…”
David looked from pony to pony. Was he the unreasonable one? "What is the pony view on clothes anyway?"
Joy shrugged. "They look nice."
"Work uniform." Backstory jingled, shaking her name tag in the process. She was a writer for a corporation and dressed the part! "When I'm off-duty I can wear whatever I want, or nothing."
“I like my hat…”
It was more of a beret, but David did not correct that. "Alright, so… Forgive me, but stripping nude on the sidewalk feels pretty strange. Can we go somewhere a tiny bit more private?"
Joy hiked a brow. "Stripping in public? That is odd." Despite a complete lack of a nudity taboo. Societies were strange. "Back to your place?" She was looking at Gloomy. "And you alright?"
“I am not. The text message helps, though. I know he is still out there. The pony that sent the text isn’t going to keep him away. It’s like the words told him, when we made the deal. Either we’ll search for each other or we won’t. I will.” She spoke like she was reading from a drive thru window menu. “Also yes, ‘my place’...”
The group made its way back to where they had started, with a much more spirited human. Half human? Back Story was looking him over. "You're still a human from the middle up, but a pony from that down. I bet marketing could still use you for a lot of shots if you were interested." Her interests were elsewhere. "So humans wear clothes all the time, right?"
"Most of the time, especially where I'm from." He stretched a hoof backwards before his next big step. "Do I really look half-pony?" He couldn't say as opposed to a horse. He hadn't seen any of those…
You have pony hindquarters… and a horn. That is actually the weirder part, but I don’t know why…” Gloomy contemplated David’s conundrum with the intensity of a foal solving a fast food menu-maze for the first time.”
Joypad brushed against him as she accelerated to the house and grabbed the handle in her mouth, tossing it open. "You're still you, which is the important part."
"Hear hear!" Back waited for David to head in before following herself. "Now about those questions…"
"First." David glanced at the door, nodding at its closed place, his friends inside. "Let's… try this." And he slipped off his pants in a rough shove, no slowness about it. He danced free of them, balled around his new hooves as they were, his new tail flicking animatedly as if in joy at its freedom. "Behold?" He was colored faintly, but largely kept his emotions on the inside. Still, the blush on his dark skin was a hint that he was feeling them despite any attempt on his part to hide it.
“There is a traditional song for this exact situation.” Gloomy nodded sagely. “It has been passed down in my father’s family for generations…”
"Um?" But there he was, naked, and the ponies weren't worried about his… His… He looked down. "Oh." A man should be expected to make more of a response. He was like any other cartoon horse, G rated. "Huh…"
Joy cocked a brow at his confusion. "Something wrong? You look fine, minus the half and half thing, which isn't awful."
“Go commando, like GI-Joe or Rambo,” Gloomy chanted to her own furious beat, which suddenly ground to a halt. “Swinging through the trees, Tommy knocker Tomm knocking on my my…. Oh wait… I am so sorry. That was very inappropriate…”
David laughed tensely. "Most of that song does not apply…" He had nothing to knock on anything. Shoot… "I am going to need a pony biology lesson, I think, being one from here down." He put his hand even from where the fur started. "Also, keeping this shirt. Bare skin gets cold easily, so whatever. Not the first person to wear a shirt and no pants around here, I bet."
“We need food. Somepony has to walk to get food.” Gloomy observed randomly.
"Nope!" Back Story flipped out her wings in either direction. "Walking is not strictly required."
“There are a couple of diners that have traditional Unicorn food. There’s my work that serves nice snacks you can eat while playing games, and there’s the new pizza place.” The options were pretty straightforward
.
"Pizza, got it!" And she was gone in a puff of smoke into the air, the door closing behind her, thrown open along her way. "Be right back!" Food was apparently her treat, as she had asked for no contributions.
David was busy poking and prodding his new furry parts, perhaps searching for the missing bits? Or the new bits in his tail and furry exterior. Either way, he was distracted, but didn't look unhappy about it, just curious.
“Charlie doesn’t have one either, if that makes you feel better.” Gloomy related without any outward emotion. “I seriously checked once… and he’s still cross with me over that…”
Joy looked between the two quickly with darts of her head. "Checked for what? Have what?!"
David laughed a bit more easily than the first time. "I'm more wondering how she knows, but I still need to be caught up on pony biology. Seriously though, he's a doll. He is missing a lot, I would imagine?"
“Before magic, he only had my senses…” Gloomy sighed. “Since, He has every sense sewn into his face, but none of them ever turn off. He needs me to absorb the sensory over-load, just like I need him to… We need each other…”
"To be clear… He had you look at him somewhere that embarrassed him, and he took it out on you? That isn't cool." That wasn't stopping David from prodding at himself, trailing along his new thighs as if he were petting himself. "Sorry about that."
“He didn’t let me do anything.” Gloomy hung her head. “I was his only source of awareness in the world. He couldn’t stop me.”
His hand found something better to do, landing on Gloomy's head with a gentle petting of her ear since she didn't seem to mind that. "Sounds like he was stopping you anyway."
“We were a long way from the side of right,” the grey mare admitted. “Even after I find him… it can never be the same…”
"The same is a lousy target." He pinched and played with her ear. Ponies had such pettable ears! "Let's aim higher than that. So hey, she's probably gonna come back with 'everything' on the pizza. That alright?"
Joy shrugged. "I'm not picky about free pizza. You?"
"I am honestly unsure…" David looked at Gloomy. "You?"
“I’m good with whatever.” The unicorn shrugged.
David joined in the shrug. "Sounds like we're good then, so… I know you want to ask me a bunch of questions, but I have pony questions that hinge on the fact that I am one in part." He reached back and took hold of his new tail. "Let's start with this."
"That is a tail," Joypad helpfully noted. "What about it? You know what a tail is, right?"
"Sure sure, in theory." He wagged the tail in his grip, not with its own power. "But it feels like the whole thing is moving instead of just the bit near my butt, the dock?"
Joypad looked back at her own tail as it wagged gently. "That's pretty normal as far as I know."
“Tails are very expressive.” Gloomy sonnet nodded sagely, deftly thwacking open the refrigerator door with her own. “Does anypony want a soda? We have Unicherry, CarrotUp, and Spicy Rad. It’s radish flavored. Charlie has odd tastes…”
David raised a finger, just for it to curl, the statement unsaid. "Huh… Is nutrition much a pony thing? Back where I'm from, I avoided sugary drinks, but I'm not that anymore." He set a hand on his furry lower belly. "Maybe it doesn't matter anymore. Do ponies who eat a lot of sugar get fat?"
“Ponies who eat a lot and don’t exercise get fat.” Gloomy answered with exactly the emotional gravity the statement warranted. “Some ponies have trouble with too much sugar. It’s a medical condition.”
"So exactly the same as humans." David shrugged. "And I don't plan to start getting super active, so no sugary drinks for me. Control the in, or control the out. My choice is made!" He clapped his hands twice in firm strokes. "So… am I setting off all of your uncanny valleys right now?" There he was, half pony, but not properly pony. He was closer, and yet clearly apart…
Food! The group devoured their pizza eagerly, well, most of them. Gloomy was taking her time with her usual amount of zest, allowing the others to chow down ahead of her. David realized something suddenly. "This is going to be a strange question that… will probably sound odd, but it needs to be asked."
"Yeah?" Joypad raised an ear at him. "What's up? Still hungry?"
"I'm fine." He had eaten three slices and his glances implied he could go for a fourth, but he was looking at his pony pal instead of that. "What goes in has to come out, rule of nature, except all the offramps I have are remodeled. So… I want to not mess it up, but it probably all falls under the 'how can you not know that?' header, since even a little foal would learn about it all pretty fast."
“You poop with your butt, don’t overthink it.” Gloomy replied without looking up from her food. Then without looking up to read the room droned on, “That’s what he was asking.”
Back Story considered with a hoof to her chin. "I mean, yeah, most animals do that… but it's different… Wow, I never really thought about it… but a fish is gonna be different than a pony."
Joypad clopped a hoof to her face. "Go in there and…" She trailed off. "Wait… As a human, you had no fur, um, down… there… That I knew of… So… Oh… Oh! Oh… Wow… I'll be right back." She nudged David towards his new hooves. "We're going to the bathroom."
And soon the room was down to half its original inhabitants. Back Story glanced at the sedately chomping Gloomy. "Hope everything comes out alright…"
“Every pony asks these questions when they’re young…” Gloomy tilted her head uncertainly. “Right? I assume this is a human thing?”
"Sure, yeah." She bobbed her head as she brought up a cup held between her hooves in a slurp. "But he isn't a human, especially down there, so…"
“According to Charlie, humans have extra bits.” Gloomy nodded sagely. Then with the passion of a reading of Tuesday’s menu specials continued, “This is probably one of those things. Those things that require that friendship thing everypony loves now.”
Back grabbed a new slice between her lips, chomping eagerly. "Would you rather be fighting? Unicorns aren't nearly as bad as they say." She caught herself with a squeak. "I didn't mean it like that!"
“I grew up with unicorns.” Gloomy replied flatly, “Trust me that they are at least as bad as they say.”
Back laughed with tense worry. Her eyes lifted with motion. "Hey, all okay?"
"I've seen things." Joypad sunk to her haunches, returning to the circle. "But, yeah… all done."
"Sorry." David thumped down onto his butt, a thing he still had compared to his haunches-using friends. "Thanks."
“You actually watched him poop?” Gloomy quirked her head to the side. “I’m not in a position to judge…”
Joy buried her face in her hooves, her voice muffled in her cry, "If you know a better way to do this, please share! It was that or shove him in the shower right afterwards."
Back grinned at David. "Topic shift! Human stuff! Are your families arranged the same way? A stallion and a mare fall in love, children happen, the end?"
“That is not at all like the stories Charlie told me about the stories of human families,” The gray mare didn’t seem especially interested.
"Right! A wedding, duh." Back Story bobbed her head with complete confidence. "Is that how humans work, or is it more exotic?"
"It… varies." David wobbled a hand in the air. "But usually, yeah. Sometimes the marriage is skipped, sometimes the children are skipped. We come in a lot of flavors, especially on a world with billions of us."
Joy's brows went up together. "Billions? That's a lot of you, David."
"It is, perhaps, for the best that there is exactly one of me." David reached for an unclaimed slice. "And now just one human, half a human, on the planet." A thought tickled. "Say, how many ponies are there, you know, in total?"
“I don’t think there’s ever been a full count.” Gloomy hummed for a second in thought. “Bridlewood is more of a village than a city, we’ve got around 6,000 ponies at last count.”
Back nodded slowly. "We only just came together." She brought her hooves together in sympathy. "And we weren't keeping the best track even of ourselves, so a whole count is… unlikely. That would be quite a bit of counting."
Joypad crossed her arms. "Well, now I'm a little curious… We don't add up to billions, gonna say pretty easily. Seriously, billions? How do you even dream of fitting that in a city, even like Zephyr Heights?"
"We had a lot of cities." David shrugged as he mentally journeyed from one to the next, visiting a few he could envision from other countries. "Tens of millions a pop."
Joy shoved at him. "Get out! Um, if each had tens… That's a lot of cities! What, I mean…"
"Complete global control." Back's eyes shone with the implications of it. "That's the only way that could've worked."
“According to Charlie the only thing that could challenge humans for control of the planet was other humans.” Gloomy nodded sagely, her voice a droning monotone. “They conquered the entire planet by conquering each other piecemeal.”
"It wasn't easy, fast, or nice… But it was done." David shrugged gently. "Nobody asked my permission or advice on any part of it. Let's not belabor them too much."
"Please let's!" Back was practically vibrating with the lore dump. "Tell me more!"
Joy gently bapped the eager pegasus on the noggin. "Points for enthusiasm, but this doesn't look like a comfortable topic. I don't think he's proud of that part of his history."
Was it his history? Technically, yeah… He was still a human,especially upstairs. "Not so much to be proud of there."
“I found the stories interesting.” The gray mare continued absently with little sign of interest. “Humans never waged war on other species. Only each other, and still they conquered them all. Except the emu. Humans actually went to war against the emu and lost…”
That was a story David knew. "That was a mess, but it was called off due to it being a hassle more than anything else. "Sudden change of topic time: What now?"
Joy inclined her head. "What now? Oh, well… you're not dying right away, that's good…" She looked to Back. "So this is more in your court. Should we head back to Pegasoft?"
“Can Pegasoft track a text message?” For the first time there was emotion in Gloomy’s voice as she faced the pegasus in the party.
Back quirked an ear at Gloomy. "You mean on a phone?" She drew hers free, waving it at the end of her wing at Gloomy. "We're a software company. We make software! Speaking of that, probably someone somewhere in the HQ that wrote something for that. Why?"
“I received a text message in the doctor's office from a pony that claims they have found Charlie.” Gloomy’s voice took on a dangerous edge, passing the phone with the message to her pegasus friend. “They say they are going to return him… eventually. But I would like reassurances…”
Back looked over the writing there quickly. "This is more of an email, which is good!" She clopped her hooves with a growing smile. "There's more to see in an email anyway, um, if you know how, which I do not…" The smile dimmed, but only a little. "You'll have to ask around back at HQ, which is where I suggest we go next, with a recovered David!"
I still have to test Blue Sky’s medicine tomorrow.” Gloomy said with a determined scowl. “And it’s going to take two days to walk back to Zephyr heights.”
"Which means you might be a little girl at that point… You can ride on the floating disc if you want." She'd be small enough, by his calculations. "But it sounds like we have that settled?"
"Even when I was a filly the first time, I wandered wide from the village.” Gloomy shot David a reproachful look. “I didn’t need to be coddled then, and I don’t now. I’m not going to be carried around like some kind of d-...” The word caught in her throat.
David shrugged softly. "They had to carry me. Not my proudest moment, but it got us here faster. Your choice, just an offer. I'm ready to walk, and that feels good compared to then." He stretched one leg and the other. Altered, perhaps, but they were his and they felt ready.
Joy waved downwards. "Easy, we're all on the same side. There's nothing wrong with asking for a hoof up, so don't feel bad asking, alright? Head out tomorrow morning? Assuming everything goes alright with the doctor."
“I’m sorry,” Gloomy tucked her tail and lowered her ears, “It was just always a thing with me and Charlie, I was the one who carried him. I got to choose where we went. Riding meant you had no control.”
"Of course you have control." He reached for those lowered ears as if gentle pets would help make them raise up again. "You just say what you want. Being friends, we'll probably do it."
“That’s exactly what I would say if I were in control.” Gloomy hung her purple-maned head in a sulk.
Not resisted, the gentle strokings of her mane and ears continued. "Then I promise to be a gentle ruler. Seriously, we're here to help."
Joy shrugged softly. "I'm already in charge of keeping him in one piece, what's a unicorn filly that's not really a filly on top of that?" She frowned suddenly. "But if you're coming to my place, you're helping out! Them's the rules!"
“I’m also going to need to talk to Mr. Alphabittle.” Gloomy mused glumly as she contemplated her next moves.
"Onwards… to bed!" David clopped towards where his resting place awaited him. "We have a lot to do tomorrow and it's already late."
Back let him retreat, but wasn't moving. "He does know it's about eight, right?"
Joypad snickered at Back's confusion. "When he's allowed, he hits the hay early."
“In my experience the elderly need their rest.” Gloomy Sonnet said with the straightest imaginable face.
Joypad shrugged softly. "Greymane. Either way, up to us youngbloods to keep them in shape." She rose to her hooves. "Still gonna get some sleep, because he'll be up before dawn, probably." And she wandered off without another word.
Back watched her go with a hum. "Well… I probably should too…" She flopped over right where she was. "Night."
“Mr. David…” Gloomy shuffled her hooves nervously with no discernible rhythm. “I found Charlie almost 20 years ago. He was old even then. You talk to him like a peer. How old are you? I’m sorry if it’s rude to ask.”
Back peeked at the one pony still there in the room. "Dunno. Do humans live the same age as ponies?" Not that the maximum age of ponies was likely to be disclosed. "Dunno. And now he's not exactly 100% human, so… dunno!" The key word for her evening. "Maybe he just runs early? Some ponies are morning birds their whole life."
“No. I’m sorry, you think I am still making jokes.” Gloomy shook her head. “It wasn’t a joke. Do any of us know how old any of us are?”
"Oh, sure." She waved off the idea. "But a lady doesn't say." She waggled her brows at Gloomy. "And it doesn't tell us at all how old that is in human years."
With the question remaining entirely unanswered, it was time to catch what Zs they could manage. The house filled with many free Zs, just waiting to be caught by any that had the will to do so. A pity they were lousy hunters in their sleep.
The next morning had them up and out. They had a doctor to meet. "The pill didn't taste awful," noted David as they headed over. "And you can just swallow it." David could just swallow it. He often forgot that most people preferred not to dry swallow their medicine in that fashion.
“I’m afraid to guide the rhythm…” Gloomy clopped her hooves nervously. “After I saw the words, I felt so… small. Now I’m going to be even smaller.”
Gloomy Sonnets pupils shrunk slightly, “I can do this.”
David set his hand on Gloomy, reaching for her. "We're with you. You're not alone."
Joy jumped forward with a smirk. "He's got that right! Two and a half ponies on your side. That counts for something, right?"
“I can do this.” Gloomy nodded at the Doctor’s door and spoke impassionately. “I chose this path. It will work.”
They arrived, gaining entry with David's clever fingers. Not that the door was locked or that any of them couldn't have done the same thing, but he got there first and he opened it. He waved for the others to proceed, holding the door open for them.
"Such a gentlepony." Back Story giggled on her way past into the clinic.
“You like him enough to help him poop?” Gloomy shrugged. “I’m not judging, but you better say something. Pega-sister is very obviously in the game.” She almost smiled as her hooves tapped the rhythm. “I am not putting this off… I can’t even see the other side of this conversation that yesterday I didn’t even know was happening. But now I know, but I can’t see it.”
Joy inclined her head. "You lost me. The doc's not doing anything to David today, is he? And stop bringing that up!" The earth pony stomped with a loud snort. "He asked for help in a very awkward situation… It was the mature thing to do, and I responded in kind. It wasn't like he asked for any of this."
Back Story turned back from within the clinic. "Everything alright out there?"
David waved past the door. "Everything alright?" That had already been said, he realized just after saying it. "What's up?"
“I’m the one that made the deal… I can walk away from it….” The gray mare sat in deep thought. “It wouldn’t even make any difference. This treatment is far from even provable at this point…”
"Oh." David let the door close on a startled Back Story, shutting her out for the moment, or shutting her in? "Nobody here is going to force you to do this. I barely know you, to be frank, so what right do I have to even insist, in the end? I don't know the little girl involved at all. Unless you explode on taking it, I think the guy will try it on her one way or the other."
“I’m alright.” Gloomy inhaled deeply as she stepped through the door. “This is exactly what I knew was going to face somepony when I made the jinx. Somepony just happens to be…me.”
David pulled the door back open the moment Gloomy started for it and advanced with her, Joy a step behind him. "Maybe nothing will happen. Only one way to know. Doc, you in here?"
"Finally!" It was Back Story, not the doctor. "He said I had to wait out here. Not a patient or something like that. Spoilsport…"
“Miss Sonnet?” The receptionist called out. “The doctor will see you now.”
Gloomy Sonet flashed her friends an unsure smile as she walked back to see the doctor.
David took a seat quietly on the available couch and found himself surrounded shortly with a mare on either side. Lucky… if they cared about him that way, but no. Hm, wait… "I have to stop doing that."
Joy perked an ear at her humanism companion. "Stop what?"
"I think things, then immediately shoot myself down. It's a bad habit."
Back Story flopped to her belly on her portion of the seating bench. "What were you thinking about?"
"I was thinking…" He paused. Should he even say that? Was it rude? He was a freaky alien! "Permission to be completely truthful?"
Back Story clicked the pen she held in a wing that she hadn't been holding before. "Granted."
"Alright, so… I'm a bit of a paradox." He rolled his hands over one another in a futile effort to express his emotions. "I am wildly inexperienced, but know all the ideas in theory. My aim is wide, but experience, again, kinda small."
Joy thumped a hoof forward into David's side. "You're dancing around the point."
He could keep on dancing, or just talk. They had been nothing but understanding so far… "Alright. Being a greymane, this is likely a hard no, and no bad feelings on that, but I see two lovely females I enjoy being around that I'd like to continue being around, maybe even romantic, if they want that. You're both attractive in different ways and your attitudes and what you like appeal to me."
Back Story inclined her head. "I'm flattered, but you barely know me, if we're being honest. What do I like that you like? What's my favorite color!"
David stammered, caught by the innocent question. "I know two favorite colors, one of them is mine… You like writing and creating, though, and I'm a huge fan of that. Writing has been a part of my life for decades, and a fellow creator means a lot."
Back Story leaned in closer, her snout in danger of crashing into him. "You're a writer too?! Did I miss you mentioning that? What genre? Fiction or non-fiction?! I need to--"
Joy reached around David to place a hoof on Back and push her away. "Down, mare. Is that enough? You both like writing, so let's shop for a wedding ring? Besides, all he said is that he's open to the idea of it, which is a little odd if you think about it."
Meanwhile, in the Doctor’s office another awkward conversation was taking place, as Gloomy Sonet dipped her head with her ears held back. “I’m sorry about my outburst yesterday, Doctor.”
“On the contrary, Miss Sonnet, you were right.” Dr. Feelgood nodded gravely. “I should have been more open with you all about what I was attempting and what to expect. Transmogrification is a lost magic. But once a common one, why else would bunny-corns even exist? We have bunnies. We have unicorns. But it’s fair to say a momma unicorn didn’t just love a daddy bunny a whole bunch… at least I hope that’s not how that happened…”
Gloomy actually managed a giggle, and the doctor continued. “You’re right, I’m not a good doctor, I can only treat symptoms and make ponies feel good. I knew there was going to be a side effect going from one species to another… so I followed what my cutie mark was telling me. I adjusted the formula.” The doctor blew an errant bang out of his face. “But I should have told you. I should have told all of you…”
The doctor heaved a heavy sigh. “Helping your friend was a rare opportunity, but the medicine we used for him never would have never been appropriate for Blue Skies, she needs a unicorn to unicorn transmogrification. And I’ll be honest, what you said yesterday hurt, a lot. But it hurt because you were right. You’ve trusted me as a doctor for years, and I betrayed that trust. What you're doing is very brave, Miss Sonet.”
“But will work?” Gloomy asked. “David’s medicine had… side effects…”
“Yes, yes,” the doctor nodded in friendly agreement, “Species to species transmogrification is unprecedented. I only meant this medicine to transmogrify from a pony to pony, within the same tribe. I made one small modification… based on observations of David’s trial. The process seemed uncomfortable. So you’re going to go to sleep after taking the medicine. So you should go home and make sure you are comfortably reclined before you take it. It should be perfectly safe based on previous trials. Have your friends monitor you and fetch me immediately if anything goes wrong, otherwise come back in the morning and we can evaluate the results.”
In the front, Back Story sat up. "I never had someone just… ask like that… I'm flattered, but I still barely know you. Fascinated, sure, yeah, but that's not knowing… you know?" She had picked her favorite word.
Joypad rolled her eyes, not looking nearly as smitten. "You're still a crazy alien, and half a pony. The wrong half? The other way would be just as bad." She applied her hoof to her forehead. "And now I'm imagining it, thanks… Look, I know you better, and this is still a sudden move. What's the inspiration? You didn't spring a loaded question on me and we've been together a while."
Nopony had even noticed Gloomy’s return in the haze of awkwardness. She tapped a sly beat with her hooves. “I am semi-dating my sentient living doll. I am not going to judge you.”
Joy jumped at Gloomy's return. "Oh! You look… exactly the same… So… go well?"
“The doctor made the new pill so that I’ll sleep through the transformation.” Gloomy explained the doctor's instructions to her friends.
David bounced to his new hooves with a clop. "Well, nothing more to do here then." With a marching bit of video-game music whistled, he advanced on the door, holding it open for the others. "All aboard."
Gloomy tapped a jaunty marching beat to Davids as the line of ponies paraded out the doctor's office. And thus they marched across town to the heartfelt music, and tossing their heads to the rhythm of their hooves like the happy little horses that they were.
Joy moved to David's side. "You seem… peppy today. Is that related?"
"Hm?" He considered with his steps. "Now that you bring it up… It's like… Oh!" He reached back and patted himself on the small of the back near his new tail. "That thing fixed my fricken back!"
Back inclined her head as her name was said. "Your back was broken? I would have noticed that…"
The jaunty march ended in a sudden clomp of hooves coming to a halt. Gloomy cocked her head to the side. “Well that happened… So… Back to my place and order more pizza?”
David stroked at his chin, moving along with the lively step. "Speaking of that, maybe I can handle cheese…" It clicked. "I already did! Shoot. I was just not paying attention." He snapped his fingers and clapped his hands in one motion. "Today is looking up! But how are you doing?" He reached for Gloomy. "Sorry, not trying to ignore you."
Gloomy’s face broke… no wait that was a nervous smile, “N-not at all, actually you’ve been very supportive through a very trying couple of days. All of you have.”
Back burst into airy giggles. "What are friends for? Sure, we're still, um, not even that far, but we're still friendly ponies being all friendly for each other. Close enough." She threw her head at David. "Did you know that big lug just asked if he could be our boyfriend, both of us, at the same time?! The nerve." She didn't look mortally offended, more stricken with amusement.
“Huh, I owe Charlie 2 bits when we find him,” Gloomy recited as if she were reading the list of ingredients of a breakfast cereal, “I’m not sure what he wanted with two bits, he doesn’t really keep material possessions, being a doll. Also not sure how he knew that was going to happen… Huh.”
David could predict the hows and whys easily enough. "Of course he would… But wait… He didn't know I was here until very recently, so… when was that?" Still, his good mood could not be easily squashed. With a triumphant ballad that meant finding an item in a game that did not exist in that world, he opened the door leading to Gloomy's home for everyone.
“It’s a bitter pill,” Gloomy sighed, as she tried to lie comfortably, knowing she wouldn’t be the same pony when she woke up. “And it’s hard to swallow…”
She sighed and counted, awaiting sleep to take her.
The house was quiet despite the number of ponies and other creatures within it. At least until one of them awoke with much to say.
Gloomy awakened in a cold sweat. “My beret is too big! I can’t see!”
"Hm?" Steps were coming closer. "You alright?" asked the muffled voice through the door, a male voice giving away who it likely was.
“You can come in.” Gloomy regained her composure, pushing the offending headgear away from her eyes. “I’m still gray”, and that’s good, because after that dream I was afraid I might turn pink. I’m not sure why…”
He turned the knob and opened the door. "Pink?" Ah, right. He remembered who was in charge of her. "That actually makes more sense than it should…" It was only entering that he actually saw what had resulted.
Alot of it seemed nonsensical, with underground cities and bug ponies…” The little grey filly explained, clutching her suddenly oversized beret. “But then, this stallion just appeared while I was floating down a river and proclaimed that he was no pony. And I did not know him. Then he said that it was just a dream but all the rest of it really happened… and then I woke up like this… huh… it actually worked?”
The mare he had known was little more than a foal. Hugging her hat like it was a lifeline. This was clearly the same pony. Even though her hoof taps seemed random.Then, as she randomly flailed her hooves in what was doubtless meant to be a mindbending jinx, David noticed she had no cutie mark.
It was then that he realized something. He had no idea how ponies got cutie marks anymore… Still, her freaking out didn't seem to be directed at that, so he let that slide quietly. "You're still in one piece. How do you actually feel?" He crouched down on his new pony legs, closer to her. "Anything off, besides being smaller?"
“I’m… okay.” Gloomy nodded with a sigh. “The dream helped a little. I didn’t get smaller, the world just got bigger. I wish I never saw the text. I knew from the moment I found him, that ragdoll, it was jinxed.” Gloomy laughed mirthlessly.
"It's complicated." And a thing he usually spent time not really thinking about, but there was living proof of it and that wouldn't be enough. "Come here." He sank down to sit, right on his new tail. "Ow." It pinched a little and he brought it out of the way. "I'll tell you how it works, if you want."
“I don’t honestly know how much control I have.” Gloomy admitted with a sincere smile. “Anything you can explain… my only source of information is… well… you know….”
"I'm offering a second source of info." He patted his folded leg, even if the sound was off with his bare skin striking a fur pelt instead of mostly bare skin. "If you want it."
“He means well. But I don’t think he actually remembers the things he thinks he remembers…” The Gloomy Filly shuffled her hooves with no particular rhythm. “Is it wrong to think I had my own story?”
"I got comfortable with not having my own story, though I suppose I do now… Either way, I got very used to not thinking about it. Being told for sure is, in its own way, a curse. The most powerful jinx you're likely to run into." He gave up trying to attract Gloomy any closer. "Still, option's there. That box is already open."
That box remained unchecked.
With a heavy sigh, the newly minted filly looked to the older human and nodded. “Anything you can tell me that might help me understand what I’m dealing with. I’m starting to realize that I’ve been playing with fire like a foal for a while now. I need to at least have a better idea of what exactly I’m dealing with.”
"That gets into philosophy." He considered with a faint hum. "Look, there are two ways to… It doesn't matter. This is your life. The outside of that? Outside your control. Worrying about it is a good way to just lose sleep and be miserable. Focus on the inside of it and live on your own scale. Trying to play with things outside that risks a lot, but… I didn't bring you here to tell you that." He hadn't 'brought' her anywhere, but that was another point entirely.
“Alright,” Gloomy responded with a grim nod, “I’m already in this up to my flank. What can you tell me about what I’m dealing with?”
What he knew could perhaps break her more, or not? He wasn't sure exactly what she had been told. "This is a story, you mentioned something about that. I don't like focusing on that, and forget it as quickly as possible. I suggest the same for you. So, this is a story. The Text is the avatar of the one writing the story. Different Text, different author. Every author has their own personality, being a different creature. One Text may be quite nice to their creation, one might be a complete jerk, and none of them can really interfere with the other other than yelling at them a lot, because nobody can tell you what to write, in the end."
“I follow you, so far…” Gloomy cocked her head the side. “Actually I think I’m starting to understand what happened a little. Charlie had said that another text was involved. So what we did caused what you just said to happen. The two authors were yelling at each other?”
"Basically." He reached in an attempt to poke her with one finger on her small little snoot, cute as it was. "And you have a different text than me. Mine can't do anything to or about you, other than suggest it, at best, to yours. The reverse is the same. Not that either couldn't try, but the other could just write it out of ever happening, so that's a losing game. Before you ask, yes, in theory, I could be hitting up mine to fix all my problems and set me on easy street, but that would be boring, and also an awful story. That second part being what it cares about, so it isn't likely to be a thing. But could they? Sure."
“The texts seemed to be arguing about rules.” Gloomy hummed thoughtfully. “Charlie always said there were rules dealing with the Text. But he never went into specifics. I doubt he knows all the rules himself, and as you’ve probably noticed, he can have a hard time telling things he remembers from things he imagined, from the time he was insensate. What are the rules as far you understand them, Mr. David?” The filly’s eye’s became adorable little sad saucers pleading for answers.
He brushed from that nose point to along her cheek. "That's maybe the worst part? They're writing it. They can write what they want. There are guidelines, but that's it. If my text wanted me to explode in a shower of pixels, there'd be literally zero I could do about it. So I don't worry about it. It's pointless. The sun could explode, but what would I do about it? Nothing, so why even think about it? They could make me into a pony, pop, either with or without a reason. Maybe the pill I took isn't finished? Maybe no excuse given. They don't need one, but usually like one, for that better story I mentioned." He brought in his other hand, cupping Gloomy's face gently. "This is the curse I was talking about. You've seen outside the safe little box, and we can't undo that. Just learn to deal with it."
Gloomy Sonet burst into fits of giggles. “I get it now. This bedtime story Charlie used to tell me about how two Stars in the sky decided it might be amusing to make all their favorite ponies deal with their emotional problems through competitive beat poetry. But then as they called their ponies together, they discovered that none of them actually had the musical talent, nor the actual desire to even take part in these confrontations. So finally one Star looks at the other Star and says, ‘Okay, I admit it, this wasn’t as much fun as I thought it would be…”
By this point the little gray filling was rolling on the floor laughing in sobs, “I never got why ponies laughed before. I get it now, you laugh because it hurts…”
"Well, yes. But now we're back in philosophy." Perhaps that was just where it needed to be. "You can be mad at the world, sad, glad, or laugh. I generally go for that last one." He drew his hand back, no longer in contact with the filly as she flopped about. "To turn your situation to a positive, you've been given years you wouldn't otherwise have, age wise."
“I never wanted to be this young again.” Gloomy stomped her cute little hoofsie in an expression of pure rage. “I’m not going back to my parents and they wouldn’t take me back if I did. I found Charlie at the foot of the mountain we climbed to get to Zephyr height. That was the furthest that I’d ever run away. I heard a pony screaming in terror. And I ran to help. And he was just laying there. Staring at nothing and screaming. But then I saw him, and he stopped. And he was staring at me like I was the most important thing in the entire universe. My parents never even cared that I was gone. ‘She always comes back when she gets hungry’. And each time I ran away I got better at staying away longer. So nopony asked too many questions. And here’s this doll that only I can hear, and that can only see through my eyes… I appreciate you putting up with me, Mr. David.”
He shrugged powerfully. "There are zero suggestions for you to go back to your parents. You're an adult, child sized or not. You know how to be an adult pony, and are mentally equipped for that kind of thing, so making you pretend to be a foal would be not only rude but just downright cruel. So you're a small adult, and that isn't the end of the world, especially since you will grow out of it."
“I’m a small adult and I can do this. This is where I wanted to go… That was an odd question, but it was the first thing he asked me, ‘Where do you want to go?’” The filly stammered. “I said I wanted to live on that mountain. I was just a filly looking up at the mountain that had thrown the most magical thing I’d ever seen away in pile of garbage.”
"This time, let's be honest. You don't have to go anywhere." He tapped the ground in front of himself. "You have a house, and a job, and a life, and none of that was taken away. You can play the drums and beat rhymes even if you are smaller now. The hardest part will be reaching things high up, but, surprise, unicorn. Even that isn't so much of a big deal. This is exactly as dramatic a point as you want it to be."
“I’ve also wanted to leave to the point I made a deal with an obviously cursed magical artifact.” Gloomy actually smiled, from her face to her eyes. "I am pretty sure I’ve mentioned over three times that I don’t really like Bridlewood a lot… I do dislike it a lot."
“Back then, as a foal, I used to move closer and closer to ‘pegasi territory before I’d put up little stick forts.” Gloomy smiled at the memory. “I’ll come back to do shows if Alphabittle asks… but that still is still where I intend to go.”
"Then go. Actually, that's where we're headed. I need to go to Pegasoft, and pow, same direction." He clapped his hands together as he stood up without them helping. "Sounds like we have a plan!"
“How many days has it been?” I don’t know, seriously, we had a couple of nap-cuddles as we hiked up. Always up. The path always leads up. There’s no sun, really I don’t know….
David was poking at a fire gently. "A few. We're not even that far off. In fact…" He directed a finger towards the horizon. "If you squint real hard, you can see the lights of Pegasus Ville from here. I meant to ask, where did you want to set up shop?"
Back glanced in the direction they would head that day. "Zephyr Heights. What's next, Ponyville?"
Only David chuckled at the joke only he got.
“You know!” Ragdoll wailed. Ocellia kicked her fifth back leg in response. “You can… perceive me? Gloomy see’s me as a confidant… Ocella sees me as a tool. But no… you see me! OC quit kicking me in the face with your fifth leg or I swear I will sleep in that pile of garbage that will not kick me!”
That was when he realized he was asking a question of someone who could not respond coherently. He reached instead for her blanket, to draw it up over her. "When do we want to move?"
"That's cute." Joypad was sitting and smirking. "But she should probably wake up so we can consider that moving thing."
"On it!" Back reached with a wing to shake Gloomy. "Wakey wakey!"
Gloomy awoke for the second time in a cold sweat and called out. She thrashed about for a minute before realizing that she had somehow moved to the floor. Her friends were already awake, and making breakfast…
"Welcome." David grabbed a plate with his cheating human fingers and brought it around towards Gloomy. "You alright?"
“I am far from alright.” Gloomy smiled thinly. “The world is changing… even while I sleep. Thank you for staying with me Mr. David…”
With the food delivered, David stood up on new feet, hooved feet. "It is changing, but not all in bad ways." He stretched his shoulders even as he flexed each leg in kind. "Sorry, not trying to belittle your situation."
“Wow, when you stretch like that… you really are old…” Gloomy looked to her fellow mares for confirmation.
Joypad smirked as she took a few steps in a broad circle around the camp. "I know it's hard to believe, but this is pretty spritely. Whatever we did, it's working for him."
"About that." Back wobbled a hoof at Joy and David. "I didn't forget! That was my first proposal. It's hard to forget that…"
“It's like you meet something out of a storybook.” Gloomy inhaled sharply before casting a long sigh and a wistful smile at Back Story. “And then it treats you like you’re the most interesting thing it’s ever seen… Believe me, I understand that attraction.”
David kicked dirt into the fire, cleaning up to move as if that were far more important than any part of the conversation going on.
A fact Joy didn't miss. "Don't think he's ready to clear up that question."
“He’s the one who asked the question?” Gloomy scrunched her thick eyebrows and squinted. “The price of asking a question is always the answer. The answer is the reward for bravery… and the cost of failure.” The filly clopped a catchy little beat with her hooves.
With a last kick, he set the campfire to its sullen rest. "They never answered, so that doesn't work out." David dusted himself off of what little ashen bits remained from the camping. "Ready to go?"
“He is afraid.” Gloomy’s hooves beat a simple but powerful rhythm, like a heart beat, as she looked between Back and Joy. “He asked the question, an answer is all you owe. Any answer.”
Joy turned away from the once-fire, starting her march of the day. The disc was following her, each taking a turn in guiding it. "That is a question I'm fine sitting on until we're not in the middle of all… this."
Back scurried up to Joy's side. "That's still an answer."
"Not it isn't!" Joy scowled at Back. "That is, exactly, not an answer."
"You're not fooling me, or him." Back stuck out her tongue. "If the answer was 'no way!' you'd just say that. You're saying it's not that. That's an answer."
“If you choose not to decide, you still have made a choice.” Gloomy nodded sagely in agreement.
Joy shoved at Back Story. "Stop picking apart my words! Fine, if that's an answer, let's hear yours. That's only fair." Her eyes narrowed. "By the way, I'm not big on sharing, just to put that out there."
Back colored at the implications. "One mare and one stallion." She raised two hooves. "That's as many as there is supposed to be. Um… But he's from another culture. Maybe he's used to a lot of wives, or husbands, or both? I dunno! I'm very curious! I want to know more, about him, and where he comes from."
“You’re both lucky.” Gloomy smiled sadly. “You get to fight, and he get’s to choose. Charlie is a magical artifact. He belongs to the pony that wields him. Right now, that is not me.”
"Look…" David was quiet after that request for attention. "It's… I just feel alive right now. I might have said something very dumb. You are welcome to chastise me."
"Aw." Back giggled, not looking very put out by the whole thing. "Glad you're feeling better then."
"That was the idea." Joy veered towards Gloomy. "So where are you headed again?"
Gloomy Sonet glared up at the mountain from the remains of their abandoned camp. “Up… always up. Charlie is guiding another filly now. They are going up.”
"Not to discourage…" Back's wings fidgeted with her steps. "But 'up' doesn't have to mean Zephyr Heights, or maybe it does! I dunno. This is… Oh, is it alright if I use this for stories?"
“When I first found Ragdoll Charlie, right after he stopped screaming, he asked me where I wanted to go.” Gloomy’s eyes glazed with determination. “I told him I wanted to live up there, on that mountain. Then he asked me what I wanted to take. He’ll be there.”
Joy jumped into the air, shrugging in her moment airborne. "Sounds like as good a reason as any. Hopefully, your doll's waiting for you."
"That wasn't a no." Back Story casually made a note for future story purposes.
“Love is never a hard no.” Gloomy smiled before a light ignited in her eyes. She sang in an unfamiliar voice. “The light that shines through the shining night, is a lamp that I carry from my mother’s home. And the light that burns through the window panes…”
The Unicorn broke down. “And the love remains… I’m running out of time…”
Joypad gently snatched up the filly, continuing on her way with a new rider. "It'll be alright. I don't know all the hows or whys, but I have a good feeling, and those aren't usually all off."
“My great grandmother taught me that there are two kinds of rainbows.” Gloomy noted from her new found perch. “There are the rainbows everypony sees. And there are the rainbows you only see once. Because after that they’re just gone. And even if you don’t catch that rainbow, you better chase it, or you're gonna regret it every day of your life”
"The worst kind." Joy glanced to the side at David. "Am I right? They put those in games all the time. It's like half the reason they go off on wild quests."
David chuckled in agreement. "The number one inciting event, chasing a rainbow of some variety or another. There are worse reasons to save the world."
Gloomy gave David a smoldering, bitter shrug. “ I don't know why you do things…”
“Why do any of you care?” Gloomy snarled out of the blue. “I know what you are. I know what he is. I don’t even doubt that you care… but ‘why’ is a fair question, Mr David.”
"Me? Because I'm a nice person." His tail lifted with his steps, wagging a little. "Or at least try to be. I like being a nice person. There's no specific benefit, I just like being it. Is that bad?"
“I grew up on Charlie’s stories. Worlds and stories just like this that you decided were just a dream. And you never thought back even once.”
"I barely remember what we had for lunch yesterday." David lifted his hands in a helpless gesture. "Looking for thinking on the past? Generally pretty bad at it, and not even gonna argue with it. It was tasty though, I remember that. Thanks."
Joy burst into laughter. "You're very welcome for that thing you don't remember but sure was good."
“I’m sorry, Mr. David.” the gray filly flattened her ears. “I didn’t mean to lash out at you. My episodes were really bad around this age. If I fly off on wild tangents you should let me know. I have medicine to keep the anxiety in check. I… have mental health issues. So if I have mood swings and make wild accusations, please let me know, because I only ever realize it happened after it’s too late, and then it’s just embarrassing.”
"Well…" Even if David seemed happy to remain quiet, Back Story was there. "Pretty sure this counts as one of those times. I don't even know what you're blaming David for exactly, and he has something to blame right in front of us. Really, proposing to two mares, at the same time, in front of each other. It's like he wants to start a fight, or get hit. Both is an option."
“Wait… is that an option?” Gloomy cocked her head to the side.
Joypad barked into laughter. "Sure, often is. You get into a fight, you'll probably be hit. So, David, how good a fighter are you?"
"Can I surrender ahead of time?" He put up his hands wardingly. "I really don't want to fight."
“Mister David…” Gloomy shuffled nervously…
Joy snorted softly. "Coward… Then I get to claim the prize." She glanced the other way at Back Story. "You too. We won by default."
Back Story leaped, going airborne for long enough to clap her hooves. "Yes! I'll share. Hm, but what to demand?" She hit the ground in almost a new hop, only coming down to a trot. "Oh! Story time. No excuses. I want to hear more about your culture. Give it up."
“I would also like to hear a story about the world you come from.” Gloomy nodded.
"This is a price I can accept." He stuffed his hands into his pockets. Pony legs or not, his pants were still useful, and had pockets. The power of pockets was not to be trifled with. Ponies had pockets too, they just made no sense. "So where do you want me to start? Give me a topic."
“You are a friend of my best friend.” Gloomy cast wide, curious eyes at the satyr. “How did you meet?”
"Shoot." He rubbed behind his head, scrunching his eyes with thought. "That was a while ago… And I just finished telling you that detailed memory is not my thing. Shoot, how did we first meet…? I want to say it was on a chat. You have chats." He dug out his phone and wagged it at the others. "Like this, talking about fiction, pony fiction, amusingly enough."
Back tapped along with the story. "How fascinating. Like we had a meeting about humans. I could see some bonding over cryptids!" She took a few quick notes with rapid taps at her phone. "Do go on."
"I was talking about a game I wrote, and the stories, and we just, you know, chatted." David shrugged softly. "And he liked writing, especially with a little, what, you want to call it a good example? I was as good as he was getting, but that was enough for him to start writing too. We both write on the same place." He wagged the phone anew. "On our Internet."
Back took down every word, a recording app running in the background for later deciphering. "Worth every second!" She would not hurt for fodder for her own stories.
"But wait." Back looked up from her writing. "If you had an Internet, then… your civilization was… on the level of us pegasi?"
David knew the truth, that they had moved past the pegasi in some ways, still, that wouldn't help anyone involved, ultimately. "About there. We love our electronic devices just as much."
Joy barked out a brief little laugh. "And that's why you got right to fixing my computers without even an instruction book."
"This checks out with Charlie insisting Bridlewood was ‘primitive’.” Gloomy opined. “Honestly, I think unicorns kind of gave up, after we lost magic.”
Back was suddenly in Gloomy's small face, walking backwards to do so. "Hey, I get you. We pegasi? We were so put out, not being able to fly and all."
"Ha ha…" Joypad smiled nervously. "Yeah… We sure missed…" Nothing came to her head right away. "Stuff…"
Gloomy hip bumped Joy in a rare show of friendly affection. :”Earth ponies never gave up, and they never lied to themselves. They kept believing until one pony believing was enough. That was what it took, what you built is even better than magic,”
Back flew in a sudden loop, landing right back to walking with the others. "Earth ponies, represent! So, back to humans. They got magic?"
"Nope."
Joy perked an ear at that curt denial. "No magic?"
"Not a drop." David shrugged softly. "Only stories of it."
“That statement is untrue.” The grey unicorn paused and cocked her head to the side. “Stories ARE magic.”
David chuckled softly. "Well, then I am a grand wizard." It didn't help that his new horn glowed at the promise, a thing he noticed. "Huh… Going to have to figure out how to use that."
Back Story shook her head. "Not that kind of magic, though I am very interested in those sorceries. So no big flashy magic, alright. But you had smarts." She tapped at her head as she went along. "And you made stuff, lots of stuff!"
“But having stuff wasn’t enough, was it?” Gloomy flashed a near venomous smile. “You wanted more… That’s why you're here, isn’t it?”
"It's what I write about, more often than not. Fantasy, modern or not, where magic was a thing." He spread his hands out, walking with one hoof in front of the other in a precise line. "An escape from a reality where the rules were unforgiving."
Back extended her tongue faintly. "Spoken like someone who hasn't had to deal with magic, as if it doesn't have rules." She spread one of her wings. "These things have more rules than I want to deal with half the time and I'm still figuring them out!"
“I am beginning to understand you, Mister David,” Gloomy’s voice returned to its usual monotone. “In the same way I am understanding him. You don’t even know what you can do yet.”
"Now, when I was a kid." He held a hand down low to where his head once reached. "I used to do magic, at least I convinced myself I did. Never managed a glow, which I really desperately wanted, something that couldn't be thrown out as coincidence, but I did a ton of things that could be called coincidence, so many…"
Joy angled a little closer. "Like what?"
"Bikes that go faster, or shield the user from harm? General wards from bad luck, inviting good, that sort of thing… I once knocked a man over by glaring at him from a window, not my finest moment, and I conjured the spirit of my dog to growl at someone that turned out to be an enemy, but I didn't know that yet."
Back blinked slowly. "You're kidding. But you don't have magic, so… Well, you didn't. Now you have a horn."
In the corner of Gloomies' vision, an earth pony stallion the color of dirt and turmoil paced maniacally. His motions were deliberate, but his eyes betrayed a certain mania. Both Joy Pad and Back Story continued walking casually, passing the interloper without notice.
“Tell him you can see me.” The dirt colored stallion with her doll’s voice smirked. “I already know he can see me. The magic is still coming…”
“Mister David?” Gloomies ears laid back in worry. “Can you see that?”
He had been thinking of other things, just for some new thing to drop in. "Uh…" Still, maybe it matched what he was thinking. He flipped through the spellbook in his mind, the spellbook he always had, but rarely had use for. "Second." He willed it to do so, and it opened to a page with sparkly motes on it. "And…" He tried to invigorate the page, to cast it by channeling his energy. His horn went bright with newly given magic and he cast a spell, glitterdust, to make the invisible thing at least tangible to the others.
“You could ask.” The dirt colored nopony smirked, instantly in plain sight of all. “Now I’m covered in glitter.”
Joy jumped away from David and the stranger. "Woah!? Where did you come from?"
Back was too busy clapping. "Oh, you did a magic! Good job… You conjured a pony?"
"Covered in glitter. So, hey?" David considered the brown horse. "Welcome to the party?"
The dirty pony was instantly stroking Back’s mane glitching from one spot to another, “You think he called me here. That is genuinely funny.””
Back quirked an ear to the side when she was touched. "Hey, don't know you that well." She danced back, wings fluttering nervously. "So what's your name, and how did you get here if not for human unicorn magic?"
"I'll echo that question."
"Make it three," called Joypad.
"An excellent question!” The nopony smiled brightly, gesturing at the unicorn in the party.. “The short answer is she called me.”
“The long answer involves lots of exposition, Nopony wants that.” The stallion smiled, “You see she happened to come into an artifact that concerns us. Where is the doll?”
David pointed, though the finger waggled aimlessly. "Your guess is as good as any of ours." He looked distracted, thoughts wandering elsewhere. "Why?"
“Because something is pulling my strings.” The stallion was suddenly a blue skinned human. “For whatever reason, that doll has narration. And Mr. Sunshine wants it. Honestly, I would rather be enjoying magic being back, and being able to move about. You seem like a nice… unicorn filly? I swear I am not stalking you on purpose….”
Mister Sunshine? That was a term David knew. "Oh." But what could he do about it? He flipped through the book that suddenly had meaning. He could cast spells, real spells! He edged towards his mare companions, away from the brown pony.
Suddenly a pony again, the creature heaved a heavy sigh, “Really? You’re just going to throw spells at me? I’m using my nice words. I even tried to keep the background ponies out of it. I’m being really nice, for me.”
“I don’t know where Charlie is,” the gray filly confessed, “the Text sent him away because we abused our power.”
“See, like that, such a polite little filly.” The pony ran a hoof across her withers drawing a shudder from Gloomy. “But I know how the ragdoll works. And. So. Do. You. I’ve dealt with the writing between the walls myself. He wouldn’t have taken a deal with such a cute filly if she wasn’t going to keep him. So He’ll be there when you get where you told him you wanted to go. There’s no reason we have to be adversaries. And since Mr. Glitterpants is going to make me subtly tailing you complicated…”
"What? No. That'd be dumb." David had the book open in his mind to the spell. "Casting a spell on you would be stupid. You might resist it. You might resist all magic. Also that'd be rude. If you knew me at, like, all, you'd know I hate conflict." Which is why the spell he selected didn't target the stranger at all, instead himself and the mares that didn't resist his presence. They vanished with a cork-like noise and descending sparkles in the space.
The dirty nopony smirked. “I’ve been trying to arrange this meeting for a long time now. I know you can still see and hear me by the way.”
Not that there was any reply, just an empty clearing and a brown pony occupying it.
“You’re not even going to hear what I’m asking for?” The pony sneered at the empty space. “That’s just rude. I am being very reasonable here.”
The grass began to break down into the word “grass”. The thing that looked like a pony spoke. “You are not in a mood to be reasonable. I get it. Who’s gonna start the fight?”
“Oh wait, they just left,” the pony noted and shrugged, “Well that was always another option…”
It was only after they left that the group reappeared, David unlocking the two mares he had captured, mouth over Back Story and arm around Joypad, hand slapped over Gloomy. Holding that pose for so long was, perhaps, too much, and he flopped backwards. "Guh," he let out in the highlight of eloquence.
“Mr. David…” Gloomy shuffled her little hooves. “What was that? What just happened?”
Joy turned to their fallen half-human. "Gonna echo that. Congrats on the whole… magic thing, but…?"
“You cast a spell.” Gloomy accused the satyr. “Not just brute force magic, an actual spell.”
"Couldn't tell you how, exactly… But I have a spell book in here." He tapped at his head. "Normally not full of do-real-world-stuff that I can actually do, but… It's not like it's written… It's a name, in the end." David looked about as lost as anyone else. "Either way, we're not safe here, so let's go?"
“Tell me the truth, Mr. David…” Gloomy glanced nervously across the area. “We just escaped from something, didn’t we? It is okay to be afraid. Because I should be?”
"Was I hiding it?" He rapped his knuckles on the floating disc, commanding its obedience. "Because I wasn't trying. Let's get a move on."
“If I had Charlie… if I was still big… We could have taken him.” Gloomy asserted with a petulant pout.
Back marched alongside the disc, behind David. "What is this, a video game?"
"That's my line," angrily huffed out Joypad. "But, really, is this a video game? I didn't grind nearly enough for a boss fight."
“Mr. David?” Gloomy asked sheepishly, gazing at the former human with saucer-eyes. “Who was that? I’ve seen him in my dreams before… Charlie tries to pretend it’s nothing, but it has his voice. I can trust you to tell the truth, right?”
David set a hand on his head. "That is a friendly reminder that another thing is watching me right now."
"Speaking of watching you." Back moved to his side, eyeing him. "If you have magic, well, use it. Can you get us to Zephyr?"
"Even if I could." He looked to the glowing hint of the city on the horizon. "That'd be leaving Gloomy behind. Where do you want to be again?"
“I don’t think I knew enough when I made the deal to really know where. I only wanted to go up.” Gloomy looked up the mountain with determination. “I thought I was gonna make it last time, but we rolled back down. Where I want to be is up there.”
"That is vague." David scratched at his thick beard as they went. "So would you even be upset if I could do it, which I can't say I can? I mean skipping to Zephyr."
“There.” Gloomy raised a little hoof indistinctly to the top of the mountain. “Can you magic us right there?”
"I can't at this moment say I can't." Which was not the same. He flipped through his mental book. "This is a lot easier…" He remembered his last journey to Equestria. It involved runic learning of the 'unicorn magical alphabet' and a lot of learning before he could do more than weakly lift something, which he still hadn't done.
He'd skipped right over grabbing things and went to the good stuff. Was that cheating? Would that bite him on the back end? Was he playing with fire? He had none of those answers! Teleport. A spell with a simple name, but infinite possibilities. "I can try?"
Joy shied back half a step. "That does not sound confident, Mister Just Got This Horn."
"I trust our strange alien wizard." Back Story was hopping along, wings flapping with each step. "Bet the worst is nothing happens and we keep walking."
“Yes, I’m looking for my niece. Her name is Gloomy Sonnet and she is just a little filly.” The cyan unicorn relayed to the concerned and attentive Zephyr Heights’ guard-pony. “She ran away from Bridlewood with this disreputable creature… he was half pony from the barrel down… the top half was some kind of… creature? With fingers? Like in that video game…”
“Well, ma’am,” the guard responded, “If you could give us a description of the filly, we can send an alert across the network. Anypony who spots her could relay their location to the guards. I just need to get your name one more time for the report, ma’am.”
“Untitled Duet, officer. Thank you so very much.” The cyan unicorn flashed a disarming smile. “Though I prefer Madame to ma’am, if it’s all the same, sir.”
“Of course Madame Duet.” The guard nodded. “We will keep you updated. I’m sure your niece will be returned safe and sound. The pegasi of Zephyr Heights take these notifications seriously. We are a law abiding city.”
-=-=-=-=-
"One thing." Back hopped from one rock to the next, easily ascending the mountain with wing-assisted jumps. "Can you do anything?"
"Anything?" David was using clever human fingers to grasp and pull along, a form of cheating in another guise. "I doubt anything."
Joypad was riding the disc. She was not above a cheat when available. "But where is the limit. That's a fair question. Teleporting didn't work."
It had not… No matter how much he focused on the spot, they did not move. "I don't have a better answer." He hauled himself up onto the next platform with a heaving gasp. "Only practice will tell me that. Wait… Idea."
“Are you thinking what I’m thinking, Pinkie?” Gloomy grinned, before shuffling her hooves nervously. “Sorry it’s an in-joke with Charlie. I think it might be a reference to something?”
"But where can we get that much fondue on such short notice?" David chuckled softly with the received reference. "Seriously, just thinking that, I dunno, it's a range thing. Too far outside of me. So…" He turned instead to an old envisioning, the Internal Dwarves. Powered by his own will and, in theory, his own magic, he woke them up from their idle work. Was it actually helping? Well, he was climbing still.
“If I could fly, I'd live in the sky.” Gloomy chanted as her little hooves beat their rhythm on the way up the path. “I come from ‘why’, and obviously… You. Do. Too.”
Joypad thrust a hoof forward. "Onwards, good steed." That she was more of a traditional steed than the human drawing the disc she was floating on entirely escaped her. "We're almost there!"
“You know?” Gloomy Sonnet continued her monotone chant as they ascended the mountain in playful hops. “You never know yourself… All the years you lived you could be someone else.”
"That a song you know?" The climbing stopped as he reached a still steep but walkable part of things. They were coming on the outskirts of the city, a suburbs really. "Welcome to Zephyr Heights."
"Good to be home!" Back Story giddily pranced in place a moment. "And I get to explain where I've been…"
As they entered the city, conversations seemed to halt as they passed and all the phones pointed in their direction, just then they all received a message on their cell phones. “Be on the lookout for a human-like creature in the company of a pegasi mare, an earth pony mare, and a gray unicorn filly. Please report any sightings to the Zephyr Heights’ Guard. Thank you, Citizen!”
David fished out his chiming phone to find the message. "Well, dang. Would Pegasoft put out an ABP on me? We should head that way to stop them freaking out more than they already have."
Joy leaped down from the disc, walking along the road. "Probably a good idea."
Suddenly David’s phone rang, at a glance he could see it wasn’t any of the ponies he had exchanged contacts with, as most of them were walking along with him.
An unknown number in an unknown world. David wagged the chiming device at his friends. "Are spam calls a thing? Kinda has to be that, or a wrong number. Not many other options."
Joy shook her head. "I'm new to the phone thing, and it wasn't me. Also what's spam?"
"Sounds tasty for some reason." Back Story was otherwise clueless about it. "Odd."
A different tone sounded and a text notification appeared.
"Way less commitment." David had no urge to answer random calls, but a random text could at least be viewed without harm. He brought the message up.
David, it’s Ki. Answer yer damn phone!
David’s phone rang again.
Boop, Beep. David answered directly to speaker phone. "Kai?"
“Gods of hell! Dude. We just got high enough to get an actual cell signal.” The doll's hoarse voice had an almost panicked edge. “OC’s social media is blowing up, and you’re all over it. What did you do while I was gone? It’s been less than a week and you're a satyr, Gloomy is like ten years old, and I think you have a pony amber alert out you. Like seriously. Whisky! Tango! Foxtrot!”
"Are you done?" Even as the ranting went on, David casually saved the contact to his phone for later recognition. "She's an adult and can do what she wants. We're headed to Pegasoft, but this isn't about me." He held out the phone towards Gloomy. "Pretty sure you have something to add."
“Charlie is that you?!?!” Gloomies voice broke in excitement that quickly took an angry edge. “And you called David before you called me? I know the pony you're with has my number. She sent me an email telling us she’d found you.”
“I called David because your phone is almost definitely being monitored by the guard… damn, actually so is David’s. Dammit I should have called Joy, she’s a random earth pony… but I only bothered to learn yours and David’s numbers…” The doll stammered on the other end.
"Checks out." David stood there, being a convenient resting place for the phone.
Joypad perked an ear. "I don't even know my number." She fished hers out and tapped at it busily to get that information. "Oh."
Back waved it away. "Your number is your identity. You have to know that! Anywho, let's talk and walk. We can do both at once. Nice to hear from you, doll person."
“Look, it’s crazy. Somepony is claiming that she’s Gloomy’s aunt, and that she’s been led off to Zephyr Heights by David… honestly it’s stupid. But on the surface it works. So watch out. We’re almost to street level. We’ll meet you at the Pegasoft Building.” The doll gruffly chuckled.
"See you there." David pinged the hang up button. "So do ponies have any identification of any kind? Like a birth certificate or something that says 'I am this person here.' Or something like that?"
"Sure." Joypad dug out her brightly colored identification card. "Don't need it often, but here ya go."
"Fantastic. Gloomy, you have one? That'd go a long way to clearing this up." Not that he was slowing in his march through the thickly populated city towards Pegasoft.
"I have my Tea House Medallion,” Gloomy grinned, pulling out the previously useless trinket. “It proves I’m old enough to order hard drinks. Every adult in Bridlewood has one. You can’t fake one because it’s stamped with your cutie… ooohhhh. Damn.”
She tapped an awkward rhythm…
"How those work is no longer known to me." It was at that moment that David realized he had what it took, namely a pony rump. He might be eligible for one of those… He might have already gotten one! He wasn't going to double check in the middle of the street. "Let's get to Pegasoft. They still want me, and they're rich and powerful."
Joypad snorted softly. "Sure, hiding behind the bits."
“If nothing else, they can stand witness that I am an adult pony under legally binding contract.” Gloomy nodded at the idea. “Who would do something like this? I mean, it is a pretty flimsy frame job. Even if we get caught by the guards, I have actual parents and an actual aunt in Bridlewood.”
"You do?" David was moving along though. Moving like he had a place to be, which he did. The group soon found itself in front of the tower that was Pegasoft. "We meet, again, as the fates foretold."
"They did not," scoffed Joypad. "I would have noticed."
Ragdoll sat at the entrance riding what appeared to be a foal-sized lady-bug plushy toy with a pony head that waved vigorously. “Greetings! I am Ocellia Ladybug, of the Hidden Village of Enchanted Misfit toys! I am the crowned princess of cuddle muffins!”
“It’s the best we could come up with while spelunking around the under-city for days.” Ragdoll stated flatly. “You would not believe the crazy crap that goes on down there. She’s totally not a really small teenaged changeling…”
Gloomy rushed forward and snatched her beloved doll from the plushy’s back, perhaps a bit possessively. “Charlie! You’re alright!”
“I told you I’d return him as soon as I could.” Ocellia beamed. “Don’t worry, I kept Uncle Cornelius snug as a bug for you! Honestly you're, like, a lot younger than I expected…”
“Uncle… Cornelius?” Gloomy cocked her head curiously.
“Don’t ask.” Ragdoll chuckled. “It’s easier to just humor her on the small stuff…”
More new names for him to forget… David hiked a thumb at the Pegasoft building. "Should we wait here, or head on inside?"
Back was already skipping inside as if she worked there, which she did. "Gonna have a story to tell!"
“Okay… I have so many questions right now…” Ragdoll rubbed the back of his head with an errant hoof. “Starting with why does everypony in Bridlewood, myself included, trust an actual doctor who’s actual name is Dr. Feelgood? I’m just assuming the way you both look is some level of medical malpractice… because the last time I saw you guys, David was a full on human and Gloomy was a grown ass mare. Then we went to an obviously mad scientist to test experimental medicine, and… you know what, I think I answered all my own questions…”
“Oooo!” Ocellia was poking David’s pony legs with her stubby, plushy hoofsies. “It’s a human satyr! Just like in classic Humanway! I have almost a complete collection of the fifth edition books back home the hi..err… village…”
"I was pretty sure I wasn't going to fall over and die." He had half an eye on where Back had already vanished. "We really should get after her though. You all alright?" He looked from plush to plush to filly.
“I have my own questions about what happened while we were separated.” Gloomy stated flatly, “Apparently it has been a busy week all around.”
“Guards! There’s my niece!” A cyan unicorn mare with a dark blue mane pointed and shouted
A flinch, memories of past experiences coming to the surface in an uncomfortable moment. David went still and quiet, watching the guard and neither moving towards or away from them.
Joy did not have this issue. "I doubt it."
“My actual aunt has a cell phone.” Gloomy recited without concern. “Would you like to speak to her?”
“Wait… wut?” The mare was instantly set back on her hind hooves.
Joypad laughed, clopping a hoof down in steady beats. "Wow… That went as well as I thought it would."
David remained silent.
“Mr. Human?” Ocellia nudged David Gently. “Are you okay?”
"I'm fine." A small two words, spoken quietly. David was busy not moving, just keeping his eyes on the guard.
“I am a fully grown mare!” Gloomy suddenly huffed, then continued with verbal venom. “Officers, I have a meeting to attend with my contractual employers concerning my… two… magical talking dolls. I can provide ID inside the building. That is not my aunt.”
Joypad coughed softly to herself, but did not interject herself in the ongoing legal matter. "We do have a meeting in there." She turned away from it all to head inside, but didn't march away from it.
David remained still, watching silently with little fidgets of his fingers.
“They claim to have legal documentation, Madame.” The nearest guard to the mare pointed out. “And the filly says you are not her aunt?”
They were ponies. They were soft and fuzzy and, overall, friendly. They wouldn't hurt him, even if he looked very strange to them. They were more scared of him than he was of them.
Which was part of the problem. Be still, be cool. The issue would blow over. Just… be cool.
Joypad peered at the 'aunt' suspiciously. "You happy now? Can we go?" She had no fear of the pegasus police. "Back Story must be wondering where we went off to."
“You’re scaring him!” Ocellia glowered at the guards, flexing her plushy elytra to make herself more intimidating in the cutest way possible.
"I'm fine," lied David. Lying about how fine he was being a long tradition. "Um… anything else, sir?"
“David, it’s cool man.” Ragdoll inclined his head from his newfound perch on Gloomy’s beret. “They are not gonna hurt you.” He turned his eyes on the mare. “Did you really think I wouldn’t recognize you?"
"What's cool?" Was he that obvious? Maybe being half pony was rubbing off on him. The wrong half of him was pony for that! But the rules didn't have to work that way. It bothered him, which made him frown instead of being passive at least.
The mare and the ragdoll locked eyes in a contest of glares. Ragdoll spoke in a snarling tone. “Officers, if you will follow us inside, we can all provide proof that we are all exactly who we saw we are. That mare just tried to involve you in a foal napping.”
“Do you honestly think they can stop me at this point.” The mare sneered and floated a glass pipe and butane lighter to her mouth inhaling the fumes from a rainbow crystal as the guards watched in shock at her brazen change in demeanor. She continued after a coughing spree. “Celestia's great white flank I needed that… One second… I just needed you and the filly in the same place.”
The mare without a name was practically right on top of them without bothering to cross the space in between. Ragdoll didn’t even blink. Mostly because his eyes were just buttons, sewn into his head. “OC, sweetie… honey… I know you prefer your internet handle, but could you kindly tell this nice mare your real name? Your FULL real name.”
“O-okay, Uncle Cornelius…” The ladybug/pony plushy smiled at the menacing mare. “I’m Princess Ocellia Diane Pastel. Pleased to meet you?”
The blue mare shuffled back in near panic. “This isn’t over.” She hissed before she ceased to exist altogether.
Casually ignoring the rules of space startled David out of whatever shut down state he had been in. The mare wasn't the only thing to vanish, the human ceasing to be without warning or much of a sound other than the momentary sparkle before it happened if anyone was watching him, which a convenient distraction made unlikely.
Joypad raised a brow at the empty spot the mare had been in. "So… That officially gets us off the hook, right? We can go?" She hadn't even noticed the vanishing just yet.
“We’re going to have to get statements from the ponies inside, Ma’am,” a young guard colt replied. "And we may need contact information for follow-up questions, but you're free to go about your business. Have a nice day, Ma’am”
“You okay? Buddy?” Rag Doll turned to where David just was. “Holy Shit! Where the hell is David?!?!?”
That the door of the tower was opening and closing wasn't odd, ponies were coming and going regularly. One police officer or not, there was business to do, and pausing to gawk at it wasn't in the cards, even if a few clicks of digital cameras happened on the way.
Joypad wheeled about to the empty spot. "The hay! Ugh." She started for the building. "There's only one place he could have gone. Stupid magic…"
“You figure he just magically noped himself inside?” Rag doll, Ocellia, and gloomy trailed behind the earth pony.
"Can't think of another place." Joypad hopped through the self-opening door. "That or he exploded. That'd suck, so let's hope not tha--Ahh!" She jumped in place, wheeling about. "Wha--?"
Gloomy ran squarely into the panicked pony, jostling the two plush dolls riding on her back. Ragdoll peered over the filly’s oversized hat. “Hey what’s the hold u…ohhh… that.”
Joypad made shooing motions, guiding everypony, and doll, towards the family bathroom. Why did so many ponies need a family bathroom? Hush up. One does not ask about the family bathroom. "Quick quick."
“What?” Gloomy and Oceilia echo in harmony as Ragdoll echoed in surprise.
“Da Fuq was that, Joy?!?!” The doll yelled.
Joy fell against the door with her hooves. "You can talk now."
"I can see that," came David's voice from the air. "So, hey. Turns out I can't maybe use any magic ever whenever I want."
“Are you stuck in a spell Mr. David?” Gloomy asked the unseen voice in a surprisingly sympathetic tone. “That’s happened in Bridlewood a lot. Unicorns have magic, but we don’t really know how it works…. That’s how we both got this way…”
"Pretty sure I'm invisible."
Joypad raised a brow at the source. "Well, do whatever you… did… backwards? You stopped being invisible before. Do that again!"
"Easy to say." It was so much easier to not want to be seen.
“I could try to narrate you out of it,” Ragdoll replied with a scratch of his head, “but that’s kinda risky, at this point. I’d rather not risk the wrath of the Texts again… Maybe a plan ‘b’, though…”
“Usually when a unicorn gets stuck in a spell they just have to wait till it wears off,” Gloomy stated flatly. “Like that time I got stuck holding a bottle of fizzy grape soda a foreleg’s length from my head for an hour and a half.”
"Well, that isn't so bad." Like that just fixed everything. "I can wait. But the execs aren't likely to be happy to have their human back that they can't see. Hard to use for promotions that way."
Joy swatted and missed, batting at the air. "Sweet mercy! You have bigger problems than worrying about their problems. If it'll wear off, good. We just need to relax and let that happen."
“Oh!” Ocelia reared up on her back four hooves and clapped her front plushy hooves excitedly. “Can I ride on your back and flap my elytra so it looks like I’m flying ‘till it wears off?”
"I don't know who you are." This did not stop David from casually picking up the plush with unseen hands. "But up you go, fwoosh." He made flying noises without prompting or delay, swooshing Ocelia around in slow arcs in the process.
Joy set her hooves down. "I'll go find Back Story and explain what's going on."
“Whee!” The little lady-bug-pony-plushy squealed with delight.
“I see you’ve been busy.” Gloomy raised an eyebrow while addressing Ragdoll.
“Yeah…” Ragdoll chuckled. “Looks like we both have.”
“You’re the best, Mr. David!” Ocelia pumped her plushy hoof for emphasis.
"Just David works." David walked around the bathroom, zooming Ocelia in the process. "You're good at flying. You don't even need my help." Not that he was stopping the help, or the soaring.
Joy chuckled softly at the sight. "Adorable. Alright, on the case." She grabbed the handle with her hoof and pulled it open, slipping out.
As soon as Joy slipped out Ragdoll blurted out in an even tone. “Just so ya’ll know, she is not a magical talking doll.”
“Uncle Cornelius!” Ocellia gasped in shock. “You said you’d keep the secret!”
“I am OC, and sometimes to keep a secret you need backup.” The doll pantomimed heaving a heavy sigh. “We’re gonna slip up, and when you slip up you need friends to cover for you.”
"That's two for two." David did not sound overly surprised. "Are they also a human? Sloppy." Not that this paused Super Fun Airplane Time.
“Fine if were going to do this…” In a sudden wash of pink magic David was suddenly not holding a ladybug-pony plushy, but a small ladybug-pony, crossing her top four arms petulantly.. “I’m an underling.”
“They’re like changelings, but smaller and more… buggy. I met her family, and trust me they are terrifying.” Ragdoll responded. “Wait… two for two?”
Of all the bugs in the word, ladybugs were not one of the ones that triggered David. Ladybugs were cute. Ponies were cute. Ladybug ponies? Still cute! The airplane motions did not stop for the reveal, even if he gave a 'huh' of surprise. And he was visible. No fanfare or todo, just he was. "Woah, huh, take two… Nice."
“Yay! Progress!” Ocellia through all her hooves in the air in celebration, then flashed back into her plushy form. Then took a serious tone. “Me and a lot of the under-squeaks want to make contact with the surface. Mom and my brother Frank think that ponies are still too intolerant to accept us. But when my brothers found The Ragdoll, I saw my chance.”
“She only asked for a path to lead her to the surface,” Ragdoll admitted, rolling his noodly hoof. “The “Village of the Misfit Toys was just the best cover we could come up with while spelunking around for days underground.” He made a heavy ‘sighing’ noise wishing he had actual lungs to sigh with. He really needed a good sigh. “Zephyr Heights has shoggoth in their sewers by the way…”
“Those were Oobleck, Uncle!” Ocellia corrected the actual doll.
“I know a shoggoth when I see one.” Ragdoll countered.
David set the ladybug plush down gently and patted her on the head. "No offense, but you are cute." A label he could apply to many denizens of that world, from his view. "And now that I'm not see-through, we should probably catch up with the others?" Monsters in the sewers were clearly far from his thoughts.
“Right, stay focused!” Ragdoll pounded one noodle hoof into the other. “We need to explain to our gravy train why their human is half pony and their talking doll’s care-taker looks like a school filly all of a sudden.”
“And we need to get some papers to prove I’m an adult.” Gloomy added.
"Is 'adult' a thing?" David opened the door for everyone else, waving them through. "Like what can an 'adult' do that a foal can't, legally speaking?"
Joypad frowned as she headed out of the room. "Um… What their parents tell them not to do?"
"And if they don't have those?" That ponies had no orphans wouldn't be a terrible place to be, David quietly reasoned, but surely…
“They would have some kind of legal guardian,” Gloomy reasoned. “And you have to be an adult to hold a lease.”
"They have leases?" David closed the door after the group had left. "Huh. Well, let's go."
Joypad accelerated to the fore, the pointed tip of the formation to the elevator. "Hope Back kept waiting for us."
“Welp, lets all go to the meeting!” Ragdoll pointed forward from his perch on Gloomy’s beret.
“Remember the plan this time, Charlie!” The gray filly admonished her rider. “I do the talking.”
“Can I do some talking too?” Ocelia scuttled excitedly. “I love talking, just ask anyone!”
“So where are you guys going after this? Back to Maretime Bay?” Ragdoll asked casually as they waked to the meeting room. “Me and Gloomy gotta get an apartment. And I guess we got OC to look after now…”
“Hey! I’m not a pony… larvae!” The little plushy huffed angrily, crossing her front two hooves.
David swayed his arms forwards and back. "Foal? First step, we see what they want. Maybe they don't want me now. Maybe they do. What they say makes a big difference."
Joy shook her head. "We're over time. My ponies at home are waiting for us, so I hope we're headed back there…"
“You got a spot, huh?” Ragdoll inquired. “Ain’t nothin’ wrong with that. Kinda like Alphabittle. No matter how this meeting goes he’s gonna get some new machines. But he ain’t about to leave his spot.”
Joypad hmmed? "Does he run a gaming room? That doesn't sound like a unicorn thing." Oh, how uninformed she was. "Here we are."
David reached for the door first, knocking firmly with his strange human hands, knuckles on wood. "Anyone home?"
“I’m sorry for the disturbance at the door.” Gloomy droned as she walked through the door without waiting for an invitation. “We were confronted by an obsessed fan. Apparently she saw leaked promotional materials and wanted her own living doll.”
"David!" Out came a familiar grinning pegasus. "I was so worried when I heard you weren't feeling good." His eyes were on the human's face. Everything else, ignored. "Feeling better now?"
David read between the lines a little. "So the upper half still works then?"
"Hm? Oh! Yes. We'll just make sure to only, yes! Of course." He raised his hooves to capture the view of David's face. "That is a human. Back Story has been going on and on about how you've given her new stories to use. We'll be sure to put that to work, and with their source being right here, the marketing practically writes itself!"
“There were… various obvious setbacks curing David… Experimental unicorn magic. As a result I need legal documentation that I was a responsible adult when I signed my current contract for the use of Ragdoll Charlie and his likeness.” Gloomy might as well have been reading the local weather on an overcast day.
Jet looked down from David to pony height, but nothing was there. Lower… Lower… Oh there she is. "You shrank in the wash… You were an adult last you were here, and, so far I've been informed, you can't un-become an adult." He shrugged softly.
“Unicorn medicine may or may not be an exact science. Okay?” Gloomy screamed. “This happened!”
"Uh huh… And you shrunk in the wash, but you're still an adult." Simple logic in his head. "Did the machines arrive yet? Should have by now."
“Alphabittle will stream exclusively with Pegasoft machines.” Gloomy flashed a mirthless smile. “We always carry through with every deal we make. In that spirit, we need an extra room for my other doll?”
Doll? "Where do you need a room?" He glanced at David, who seemed patient enough to wait his turn. Good good. "We don't have many construction ponies signed up in that town."
“If you do not want to have access to the other living doll, I will gladly supply her with a place to stay without your assistance or licensing. We only require lodging in Zephyr Heights, as per the initial agreement.” Gloomy tapped a rhythm to remind Jet the terms of the initial agreement.
"Not really my department." He inclined his head. "If sales says you get a place, you get a place. They're really on their game! Me? I'm marketing. And I'm gonna market the hay out of that face." He began circling David, examining him from all the angles. "Now, I hear you've taken a liking to Back Story. That's good! Real good. Fantasy that loves us back as much as we love it? Ponies will eat this up!"
“And that’s what this is to you?” Ocelia folded her ears back. As she climbed onto the table. “Contractual obligations?!?!” The little ladybug flailed against the stocks of meeting flyers…
“OC…” The doll cautioned, but the filly was hearing none of it.
David was already raising his hands. "It was a moment of… I had pains for years, so long you just forget what it's like not to have them, just a part of life, but then they're gone. That kind of happiness is hard to find, and I felt… good, I guess is the word. Really good…"
Joy raised a brow. "So you aren't in love with us then?"
Gloomy snorted at the mare. “If it wasn’t real, it wouldn’t be there.”
"She's asking about emotions, not unicorn magic." Even if he did have a bit of that lately. "That's a question for not in front of Jet here."
"Too right." Jet had no arguments about that. "Now, the way I see it, we need to get you in contract. I'd prefer an exclusive contract. You and Pegasoft. The bits will flow!"
Joy squinted softly. "Why not? They'd pay well…"
“That sounds… okay?” Ocellia opined, “But can I say something?”
"Um, first, I'm already in a contract." Jet and Sky looked at David with equal surprise. "No, really. Not skipping out on that. What were you saying, O… God, I'm still awful at names. Osh?"
“--Kosh b'gosh!” Gloomy glared at the doll for his interruption. “I’m sorry girl, I had to do it. It physically hurt!”
Joy and David were looking to Ocelia, waiting her words. Jet didn't get it. "Contract with who?!"
“I am Princess Ocelia Ladybug, and you buried us when you built this city,” Ocelia stood up straight, one fore hoof in front of her heart. “In the old times, we used to be friends. I took this journey to let you know, you still have friends, even if you forgot they were there.”
Jet rubbed at the side of his head. "Are you sure you don't want to chat with the queen? This sounds like a queen thing… Bet Haven could clear this right up." That it wasn't something marketing could deal with seemed clear. "Um, contract with who?"
"I really do want to know that too." Joy raised a brow. "First I'm hearing of it."
"You should know about it. You're the one that has the contract." He reached for her head, but her ears were tucked back and her expression not the epitome of friendly. "I work for you,remember? I didn't. You've been nothing but great to me. Ghosting on you isn't how I usually handle that."
“The queen?” Ocelia fumbled with her phone. “Do you want me to call mom?”
Jet frowned at Ocelia. "Queen Haven?" Fortunately, all pegasi had Queen Haven close to hand. He whipped out his phone with Queen Haven's smiling picture. "Her? Pretty sure you want to talk to her, at the castle."
Joy was busy digesting what had been told to her. "Oh… right… I mean… We didn't sign any papers or anything. It's not like I can force you to stay with me."
"But I am, unless you're firing me?" David crossed his arms, fingers tapping at opposing arms. "Someone has to keep your computers running."
“The last thing that menaced OC was an underground river of mouthy slime. I can solve you off screen as quick as I solved them, Zing.” The Ragdol’s smile never faltered. “I feel like you're pushing things.”
“Charlie!” Gloomy admonished. “Stick to the plan, I talk!”
Jet pressed a hoof to the side of his head. "You didn't come here just to tell me no. I hope? If you won't take that contract, what will you take?"
David fished out his phone. "This thing has a camera." With a press, he had the camera app open. "I can do a lot for you from Balt--Maritime Bay. You give me scripts and--"
"No! No no… Then we can't set up the studio, or work the sound, or…" That his pulse was quickening, Jet wasn't trying to hide.
“All this about what you can’t do.” The Ragdoll’s smile never faltered. “What do you want to do?”
Joypad threw her head in the doll's direction. "He isn't wrong. You want his face or not? Make it… part of the gimmick, super homeschool looking… Hey. Humans in the story don't have smartphones, so…"
"So…" Jet's eyes began to shine. "So he's using magic, with low resolution everything to send messages to us! Oh, brilliance!" He fished out a card and handed it towards David. "Do you have one?" At David's headshake, he sighed. "Then text me. We have work to do!"
“What do you want out of this, Jet?” The ragdoll flopped closer. “You want a specific outcome. I can provide that.”
“Just tell me what you want.” The doll smiled, that being the only expression it was capable of.
“Charlie!” Gloomy Sonnet seethed. “You promised you wouldn’t do this! We are happy with the arrangements in the existing deal, Mr. Jet.”
Jet nodded at Gloomy. "Good good, then we're all settled." A little waggle of his hooves, shooing them all. "Have a nice day."
All too soon, the door was closing behind them. "He is a busy pony." David did not sound overly upset. "Make some phone videos from home? I can do tha--"
Jet thumped him in the ribs. "When did I become home?!" But David fell silent. "What? I didn't hit that hard… You surprised me!"
“I’m going to get my own room though?” The Ladybug asked the important questions.
“Yes.” Gloomy answered with a heavy sigh. The filly’s adult battles for the day were done.
Joypad peered at the odd two. "Why are you asking Pegasoft for rooms? Are you working for them now?"
“We signed a contract just shy of a week ago.” The beat of gray hooves reverberated. “We never back out of a contract. I am simply renegotiating Miss Ladybug into the contract." Nothing is ever easy
Joy nodded. "Ah, good. So you found a new home." She offered a hoof towards Gloomy. "Glad we got that fixed. You take it easy then, alright?"
David remained quiet and still.
“Nothing is ever easy.” Except maybe that hoof bump. She flashed an honest grin. “Either make where you are better, or go somewhere else!”
With the sealing of a hoofbump, Joy made for the elevator. "This trip has been too much everything. I am going home. Hey, do they have, like, wagons, you think? We could ride home!" David was trailing along with her, but didn't reply.
“Goodbye Uncle David!” the ladybug plushy shouted, waving her top four hooves manically. “You are the best!”
He waved gently, a mild, "Later." It wasn't a very energetic goodbye, and the doors of the elevator closed with a chime. They rode to the bottom, stopping a few times for other ponies getting on or getting off.
Joypad tapped at one of the many pegasi. "Say, you can fly. Why an elevator?"
The mare that was asked blinked with amazement. "Well.. for one, this building was built before we could fly, and we got very used to using the elevator. Besides, we're not all that good at it yet."
A stallion laughed at that. "Oh, wow, yeah… Still learning how to fly well. The elevator can't mess up. Get in, sit down, and it takes you where you--" It chimed gently. "--Oops, time for me to go." And he trotted off with a smile.
Joypad looked around, alone for once on their ride. "Is there a reason you're being silent?"
"I don't like being hit."
Joypad turned slowly to gawk at her half-human friend. "Huh… I didn't mean to hurt your feelings. It was just a swat…"
"I know that."
She opened her mouth, just to close it again, frowning with thought. "And that… Do you want to be mad?"
"No."
"But you are anyway." She rolled a hoof as the elevator chimed, reaching the bottom floor.
"But you seem... I thought a little poke wouldn't upset you." She looped around David as they worked down the street of the busy city. "You're feeling better now, right? After the whole... half pony thing, I thought? You said you felt like a million bits!"
"Way better." He had no arguments there. "This is more of an emotional thing than anything else, and now I feel bad." He held up a hand. "So I'm going to admit that I'm the broken one here. You were pretty clearly not trying to attack me."
"I wasn't!" One ear went down. "But you felt attacked, and that isn't cool."
"That you care means a lot." He folded his hands together in front of himself as he walked determinatedly.
To Joy's mild confusion. "What are you walking so fast for?"
"Huh?" He slowed to match her. "I'm used to walking like I have somewhere to be."
"Which we do, but we don't have to trot there." A neutral walk was more her speed at that moment. "We're getting a ride home." She flashed a sudden cocky smile. "Since somepony went and got a new side job, we can afford a little luxury."
David raised a finger, ready to argue, but... "Huh... Guess I do qualify as a pony now."
"Yep!" She bumped against him gently, as if he might break. "Welcome to it."
He wanted to assure her it was alright, that he was being dumb, which he obviously was, by his own view, but... He could either suffer silently, or not. Idea! "Joypad, I want to try something. It will be uncomfortable for me."
"I don't want you to be uncomfortable." She raised a brow at him. "What's the idea?"
"I want you to go ahead and touch me." Her brows furrowed. "Not like that. I mean poke, prod, bop, all the little things that shouldn't be a big deal. I will squeak and flinch and probably make other distressed noises, but we made a deal, right now. You have permission to keep pushing. Unless I say to stop, you don't."
"Huh... kinda strange." Not that this stopped her from poking him in the sides. It was a gentle poke, but a poke it remained. "You sure you want to do this?"
"Nope! But we're gonna." He was smiling, as if relieved by the step taken instead of scared of it. "So what ride are we getting?"
"Kinda has to be spacious." She pointed back at the disc still following after David. "I paid too much for that thing, not giving it up! Got an address for... Take a right." She veered off sharply, eyes on a road sign. "Should be down here."
The place was a brightly lit store with pictures of ponies on beaches looking quite relaxed. 'Please go away,' read the sign across the top of it, welcoming would-be clients.
David snapped his fingers. "I've seen that pun before."
"Yeah?" Joy marched right up and through the door that opened for her. "Hello?"
"Hello!" A pegasus mare waved eagerly from the front counter. "How can I help you go far away?"
Joy was looking around at the various scenes of exotic places. "Wow... Say, we were hoping to get to Maretime Bay."
The mare looked at Joy curiously. "Aren't you from there?"
"How..." But it hit her. Most earth ponies were from there. "True... But I want to go back. This was my vacation." She waved a hoof around the city in general. "Can you help?"
"Well now... We usually help ponies go away and come back, not go away and stay away." She started leafing through papers with her wings. "You have a place to stay there permanently?"
David stood to the side of Joy like a guard, quietly looming.
Joy waved at him. "I have a place, and we both stay there, so no problems other than getting to Maretime Bay. Drop us off and we'll be happy ponies!"
"Sir." She was looking at David.
"Hm?"
"You don't have to stand up, Sir. That has to be uncomfortable." She was eyeing the way, in her eyes, he was reared up as he was. "Good balance though."
"Thanks," he half-laughed out. "I'm used to it, promise. Can we get a ride? Oh." He waved back to the disc silently following him. "We will be taking this, so has to have room for that."
Joy slapped her head. "Forgot about it and I just brought that up. Yes, we need that. Can you do it?"
She considered the disc. "I'm still very new to magic... Will it follow a pegasus?"
Joy and David shared an equally unsure look. David took the initiative, "Why don't you try?" He pointed at the disc. "Knock on it twice and it'll start following you, then you can try flying."
"Oooo." She circled the counter quickly to rush up to the disc. "This is exciting! Alright. Knock Knock." She clopped a hoof against it with each announcement. "And..." She backed away and the disc casually followed her. "That is so cool." She whipped out a phone for a quick selfie of herself and her new disc pal. "Love it!"
Joy made a shooing motion. "You have to try flying, remember?"
"Oh right." She snapped her wings out and lifted into the air. The disc didn't immediately follow her. "Maybe further." She bumped against the ceiling, but it wasn't that high up. "Okay if I go outside?" With a nod given, she zipped to the door and rushed outside, the disc following behind her. "Alright! Now to really test!"
"Just go up maybe twice my height?" David suggested. "That should be enough to see if it follows or not."
"Alright." She flapped down powerfully, going up to David's eye level, then past, giggling. The disc seemed happy to remain where it was until she was far 'enough', where it began hovering up to keep close to her. "Ooo, yep, great!" She came for a landing, wobbling at the suddenness of it. Like many pegasi, she still had training to do. "Okay, since it follows a pegasus, we could get you two a ride easily, and have the disc follow you, so long as it isn't going too fast."
Visions of being on a plane with a disc floating desperately behind it jumped into David's mind, bringing a short laugh. "What do you have in mind?"
Joy reached up, rapping twice on the disc to get it to follow her instead. "We haven't found it yet, but I doubt this can go as fast as anything."
"I was thinking slow and comfortable!" The mare clapped her hooves. "How about a wagon trip?"
Joy was next to laugh, deep and loud. "Wow, I was bringing that up before. Yes, a wagon ride sounds delightful."
"Perfect!" She trotted back in with a hurry, grabbing a paper and starting to write busily. "How soon do you want to go, and how luxurious are we thinking? Actually, just answer that first one and I can give you a selection of packages and let you and your budget decide."
Joy sat in front of the counter. "Perfect. Sooner is better. Our trip here is done. It was more of a business trip, really."
The mare raised a brow. "You should have planned your turn trip ahead of time." She let her quill fall to the counter. "Tell you what, I can't do it! I could take all your bits, but I feel just awful. You'd be better just going and getting a wagon directly instead of us. Who sent you to us? We're a travel... Oh that does sound right... We're for ponies planning trips ahead of time, not at the last second."
David seemed to get it with a 'mm-hmm'. "That makes sense. Where would you go for a carriage ride today, instead of a few weeks from now?"
She pointed past them to the road. "Take a right and keep going. Watch the left side and you'll see some wagons."
Joypad turned in place. "Great! Thanks for being so nice about this. We'll keep you in mind if we ever do want another vacation. Do you handle trips from Maretime Bay?"
"Not right now, but maybe soon." She grabbed a card and offered it to David who hadn't left yet. "Call us!" She was left, waving excitedly. "Thanks for going away!"
David chuckled as they went down the street. "She really liked that joke."
"What joke?" Joypad pointed across the road. "There!" She dashed, only to come to an abrupt halt, scampering backwards out of the way of an oncoming wagon. "Woah!"
"They have crosswalks." He hiked a thumb. "I know Maretime Bay isn't as dense, but..."
"But what? It's usually safe to cross a road." She went to the crosswalk with a huff. "I'm so excited though! I miss home... They're going to be so excited to hear from you, by the way. Expect a rush."
"True." He could imagine the curious ponies back at the shop, eagerly pumping him for stories. "Think they'll get odded out by the... half pony thing?"
"Eh." Joy wobbled a hoof. "You wear those pants. They may not even notice at first, until you turn around and they see your tail!"
They got to the carriage station. Getting one headed to Maretime Bay proved easy enough with a few bits exchanging hooves. "You owe me. When you get your big promo bit bag, I want a few ." Joy stuck out her tongue as she went to wait for the wagon that'd carry them. "How much are they paying you?"
"Um..." Exact numbers hadn't been hashed out. "I should ask." He dug out his phone and Jet's number, dialing it with little beeps from the phone and his mouth at once. "Beep beep.. beep... ring..." He actually said the word ring. "Ring... Hey."
"My favorite human," came Jet's voice from the speaker phone. "How can I help?"
"Hey. We never went over what I'm being paid, and when? Not to be a pain, but good to know."
"Right right. Look, you're not working for us. I mean, you're not a Pegasoft employee, or you'd be here. We'll pay you for each gig you do, each seperate. Expect the first call soon, foal, don't you worry! The pay depends on the gig."
"I'll be double-checking!" called Joypad into the phone. "So don't try to lowball him on the rates."
"Oh, you're there too. Don't worry. We want his face. Have a safe trip back to the bay! Jet Set out!" The line went dead, the phone showing that the call ended.
David stuffed the phone away into a pocket."Two bits says he forgot your name."
"That's a sucker's bet. Hey, there it is." She rose to her hooves and the two of them got into the wagon. There was one other pony riding with them. A soft bump confirmed the disc was there, trying to catch up with them. The other pony was a pegasus stallion.
"Hi... Um..." He inclined his head at the other two riders. "Wow. Are you... from there? Visiting?"
Joy waved at herself and David. "Returning. Are you visiting?"
"Yep! Second time. Maretime Bay is a lovely city." He nodded with a big grin. "Mind if I get a picture?" With a wing flick, he got out his phone. "First time I went to Maretime Bay with some Maretime Bayers in the wagon!"
He took a snap of the three of them and quickly flipped the phone to show them. "Perfect!"
Joy inclined her head at the picture. "You're smiling."
"Hm?"
She elbowed her human friend. "For the picture. You're smiling, really big. You don't usually get that big smile."
"Habit? Someone points a camera at me, I smile. "He shrugged helplessly. "Glad it came out alright."
"It's perfect." He thumped back in his original seat, flopping across the bench. "By the way, what kind of pony are you?"
Joy bounced free of the wagon with a whooping cry. "Maretime Bay! I missed you!" She kissed the ground and regretted it. "Do not do that... Love the place, doesn't mean the asphalt is waiting to be smooched."
David stepped off after her with a flick of his new tail. "Good to be back. Welcome to Maretime Bay." He offered a hand to the last stallion getting off.
It was accepted with a smile. "Good to be here; and nice to meet you both. Hay, where are you? I mean, where should I visit to run into you two?"
Joy pulled out a card and thrust it at the stallion. "Come on down and play some games."
"Ooo! I thought Maretime Bay didn't do as much of this." He wandered away with a smile, looking ready to pay them a visit later.
Joy started down the street. "Home home home! I know which streets are which." She led the way with a big smile. "And they're setting up for... No." She was mistaken and realized quickly that they were taking things down, not setting them up. "What'd I miss?" She pulled out her phone and checked the date. "Oh. Oh! Shoot...."
"What'd we miss?" David was at her side, tail wagging slowly. "Something important?"
"Maretime Bay Day," sighed out Joy. "I think? I am terrible with dates at times. Hey!" She waved another earth pony mare down. "When's Maretime Bay Day?"
The mare squinted at Joy like she had sprouted a second head. "A month from now, why?"
"I saw the decorations coming down?" Joy pointed to some being torn down. "Thought I missed it."
"Nah! They're doing a test run, make sure we're at our best. It'll be the first since the tribes unified, that's a big deal!" Her eyes slid towards David. "Oh, that's right. You have the human. Hello!" She waved at him, seeing nothing else wrong. "Have a nice day."
"You too!" Joy turned away. "And thanks. Alright, back to the shop. It's been closed way too long."
David kept up with her easily enough. "Not to argue, but why is nobody mentioning this?" He pointed at the horn on his head.
"Huh?" She peeked over her shoulder at his horn. "It isn't that unusual? Even a lot of the animals have one of those. Join the club! She isn't one of my regulars, so she hardly knows who, or what, you are, so she had no idea the horn was new."
"Woah!" A little colt was gazing at David with wide eyes. "What'd they do to you?!" Pipster sat and raised his hooves. "Welcome back!"
"Good to be back." David reached for the little colt and mussed his mane without resistance. "What a grand adventure I return from."
"Tell me! Every bit of it." He looked past David to Joy. "Hello Miss Pad!"
"Hello to you too." Joy was smiling gently, watching the interaction but not interfering. "Quite an adventure."
"We made it to Pegasoft." David gestured wildly, emphasizing how tall the building was. "Lost in its heights, we spoke to ponies who were always in a rush, with machinations on their tongues and wild schemes in their eyes."
"Oooo!" Pipster danced in place, imagining it. "How did you survive?!"
"With luck, and help." He waved towards Joy. "She kept me safe, even during the worst parts. We made new friends, and perhaps new enemies?" He winked dramatically. "But, in the end, we were able to return, with loot."
"Oooo." His favorite word of the day. "Show me!"
Joy slipped in ahead of David. "More of the promise of loot. Pegasoft wants him to show up in advertisement, so they'll call him and he'll be paid for his efforts."
"Super neat!" Pipster clapped with joy at the news. "Did you get any souvenirs?"
"Oh, sorry, I forgot," admitted Joy.
But David was pulling something out of his pocket. "For you." He pressed something to the hoof of the colt.
Pipster couldn't wait. He raised the hoof to his face to see what was stuck to it. It was a keyring, a Pegasoft keyring. "Wow." It was a cheap thing, but held his attention. "A medal of honor... Are you sure I can have it?"
"I got it just for you, my best little fan." He wasn't thinking about it, but his tail was wagging energetically. He liked the little eager colt. "Now, we need to get back to the store so we can get it open by tomorrow. You'll be there?"
"You bet I will!" He hurried off, his saying goodbye to NPCs routine still needing work.
Joy shook her head a little. "Pipster... Glad you thought of something. Did you actually get that for him or was that something you happened to get?"
"They gave it to me." The walk resumed back towards the shop. "Free little gift. It made him way happier than it ever would me, so that seemed an easy choice."
"Nice of you." She closed with the door, quickly opening it and closing it once David was past it, the two back in her beloved shop. "I missed you!" She got to turning on lights and dusting things off. "It's so good to be back, and Maretime Bay Day is coming up, so I'd better be ready for that. Not usually a huge videogaming day, but that doesn't stop me from trying to make it one."
"So what is this holiday?" Not like he had been on Earth long enough to hear about it. "Celebrating the city?"
"Nice try." She blew some dust off the counter, coughing a moment. "Ahem... It was originally to celebrate earth ponies being all... earth pony, but I heard some ponies talking about it being about ponies being pony, so, you know..." She worked her hooves without touching. "All of them? A bunch of poniness."
"I'm down with that." He grabbed a duster and joined her in the efforts of cleaning up. "So how do we celebrate?"
"That's the question!" She flicked the power on at her console, which caused the others to start up in a chorus of beeps. "Oh! Maybe a bunch of multiplayer games, or at least games you can show off to a crowd. Nothing but party games!" She began to clap, excitement growing. "That'll draw the ponies right in!"
"Sounds like fun."
"Not your fun."
David came up short. "I didn't say that."
"Your tail said that." She was watching his new little limb. "You're not used to having it, which means you're not good at hiding it, and, please, don't fix that. If not for its hints, I'd have no idea what you're thinking." Joy clopped. "Well, we're not participating, so how do you feel about helping me run the thing?"
David went quiet. Focused on his tail, it gave a swish to the left, and a swish to the right. It lifted and lowered and went through all the calibration steps one could think of on the spot, but then began to wander on its own, his thoughts going elsewhere as he resumed cleaning.
"You seem happy."
He looked over, tail going stiff. "Is my tail saying that?"
"A little." Joy smiled gently at him. "And I like it... What's making you happy?"
"It's a stupid thing."
"Most of life's greatest things are pretty stupid," she reasoned. "So lay it on me, so we can both enjoy the stupid together."
"I love that." He turned to face her entirely. "For much of my life, I could only smile when I forced it, or if I just heard a really good joke I guess. Displaying my emotions? Not a specialty of mine. If this little guy--" He hiked a thumb back at his wagging tail. "If it can do the job the rest of me can't... Um, good, in the end. I want to be... What, seen?"
"I see you."
It was in that moment that David understood the term of 'feeling seen'. "I am seen... Thank you. Now, I'm going to clean up so we can open tomorrow."
"I'm behind that idea!" And the two quieted in their hurry to get the shop all ready for the next day and the customers that would come to ask a million questions about what happened to their human while they were away.
"Hey." Joy looked up from where she had been scrubbing. "Sudden idea."
"Yeah?" David was half-bent over a terminal, cleaning the top of it. "What?"
"Your legs." She lowered her eyes to his altered limbs. "Hiding it is silly. Why not rip that bandaid off and get some shorts? Then everypony can see and get used to it. Not like they're ugly or anything." She could see David being unsure. "Not comfortable with them?"
"It's not that, funny enough." He crouched down to hike up his pants legs. "I'm just used to pants? I've worn pants for as long as I can remember. The last time I put on some shorts, I was a kid."
"Time to embrace your inner foal then! I'll grab some shorts, if it's alright?" She dropped a rag with a huff. "I think we're as clean as we're going to get."
"You're being too damn nice." David crashed into a chair. "I'm not complaining about the lack of back pains though. That's good..."
"Can't say I know that feeling..." She was young enough to never experience it. "But I heard a lack of a no there. I'm getting shorts, and you'll pay back when you do your first commercial job. Seems fair to me." She moved for the exit at a spirited trot. "You'll be alright along a moment?"
"I'll be fine." He waved her away, and soon was alone in the closed shop. "Hm." He pulled out his phone and got to tapping at it. "Has service." He had a few bars of power, so that was on. "Now let's see if the food apps work locally." He pressed app and it loaded up quickly, asking what he wanted from large categories like burgers or pizza or 'neighponese'? Chinese? Or Japanese? Maybe a fusion of the two in a uniquely pony fashion.
Smoothies? "They have smoothies?" He clicked it curiously. "And they have delivery?" He normally avoided smoothies. Drinking calories? Who even does that. Still, he'd been plenty active, and was good with his diet, so one smoothie wouldn't make him suddenly fat.
"Sunny Starscout's Smoothie Cart," read the first entry. It had a picture of the cart and Sunny's smiling face.
"Oh damn." He had found a canon character. That wasn't... like... illegal or anything. He had been low key avoiding that, having only interacted with Hitch. "What do you have?"
He pressed her icon and up came a menu with all kinds of smoothies listed. "And how do you deliver it?" From what he could remember, she owned a cart, and sold from the cart. Did someone else deliver for her? Curiosity was growing far too quickly to say no to. He tapped in an order for a berry smoothie, medium, and trusted the phone's GPS to figure out their address.
It was only after he hit send that it hit him. There was mail sitting right there. They had the address. "Oops." He grabbed one and checked. It had used the right address. "Coulda been worse."
A clop clop came from the locked door. "We're closed," he shouted at it, pretty sure he shouldn't open the door for random folks.
"Smoothie delivery," called a female voice. "Someone ordered it, didn't they?"
Wow. Fast... He moved for the window and peeked out the blinds to see Sunny's cart sitting there in the street. It was Sunny herself at the door, holding a smoothie in one hoof with a quizzical expression. She moved her cart, the whole thing, when an order came in for a delivery. What service! "Uh... Coming!" David hurried for the door, blushing a bit at keeping the poor mare waiting as long as he had.
David opened the door smoothly. "Sorry for keeping you waiting. I'm David."
"That's a funny name." She offered the cup. "But also the one on the orderer, so here you go." Sunny looked like she was ready to go, but hesitated. "Can I... ask a question?"
"Sure?" The smoothie was cold in his hands. Frozen goodies! He sipped from the straw in it and verified that it was tasty. "Is it about what I am?"
"A little," assured Sunny, turning back towards him. "I don't mean to be..." Her tail flicked. "A bother, but I thought Hitch was making things up."
"He was." David gestured down at his visible hooves and the fur that poked over them. "His didn't have hooves, did they?"
"No, they..." She frowned and laughed at once. "You're playing with me! I didn't tell you what he told me. Stop that!" She swatted at the strange human creature in a lack of fear. "So, I'm Sunny Starscout, and you are David. Last name?"
"Silver."
"Silver, that seems less, sorry, nevermind. Hello, David." She nodded at the curious biped. "Hitch said he handled things nicely and you were in good hooves. Was he lying about that too?"
"Everything is just fine, promise. Joy just ran off to get some shorts actually." He noticed a thing. "No wings?"
She started at that, brilliant golden wings flaring into being for just a moment. "I can't really control them," she admitted miserably. "I don't know how they work. The horn either." She pointed up at her lack of horn. "You know how to use yours?"
"Not exactly... Same boat there."
"Well, hooray for that." Sunny offered a hoof and it was met with a fist in a bump. "Most ponies are getting used to their magic, which includes me. I lived my whole life just not having any, and suddenly..." She sighed slowly. "I'm rambling, and should get back to work." She angled her head at her cart. "I just happened to be nearby when your order came in, figured I'd just stop by."
"Convenient!" But... "If you weren't close, what then?"
Sunny popped her helmet back on her head. "I would have ridden here on my skates. I would have left the cart back behind. Say, since I'm here, and the cart's here, and you're here, want anything else?" She waved at the closed cart with an energetic motion of a hoof. "Probably have enough smoothie for now, but just in case?"
"I have enough... wait, do you have smoothies without sugar?" He crouched down to be more on Sunny's level. "Like diet smoothies?"
"Diet smoothies, sure." Sunny threw open the door to her cart and vanished inside. "Any of my smoothies can be made diet. Just have to ask on the app. I never added it to the menu officially. I didn't think there was a huge demand for it."
David clapped his hands. "You just made a steady customer." Smoothies without so many calories? Now they were talking... "Any idea how many calories they still have?"
"Depends on the smoothie." She threw open the window to smile at David. "There's other stuff in there. Hard to eat a bunch of strawberries without any calories, you know? Still..." She rubbed at her chin. "Still... Tell you what. I'll add a diet section soon, so keep an eye on the app. For now.. Do you like licorice?"
"I am entirely alright with licorice. Why?"
"Because you look really eager." She fired up a blender and sang to herself as she worked. "And this makes us even for giving me the idea." In no time at all, she slapped down a new cup. "Drink it in good health!"
David glanced at his betraying tail, wagging with his excitement. He claimed the licorice smoothie, now having twice the smoothie as he had originally planned. "Thanks. I'll be sure to check for the new additions."
Sunny saluted with a smile. "Looking forward to it... Mind if I ask how you knew about the wings? Are ponies talking about that?"
Crap, he had stepped in it. Still, an excuse was right there. "You did save the day." Truth!
"I wasn't trying to." She drew the window shut and closed the door, hitching herself to her cart. "I was just trying to help... Gosh... don't think I'm like a showoff or something."
"Nah, that's not you." So far David knew, which wasn't that far. "You just wanted ponies to get along."
"Right!" She started away, pulling her cart. "Feel free to stop by, or put in an order. Looking forward to next time!"
David waved at the departing protagonist. "That could have gone worse."
"What are you doing?" Joy sped up into a proper jogging trot. "You should be inside." She half-collided with him, nudging him back into the store and kicking the door behind herself. "And you got me a smoothie? That's really nice."
David did not resist as she laid claim to the berry drink. "Shorts!" She produced a bag. "Ta da! Try them out. If the size is off, I'd rather know now."
He still had a smoothie, which was a victory. Licorice smoothie wasn't bad. He wandered of with the shopping bag, returning with one less set of pants and one more set of shorts on. "Ta da!"
"There you go." Joy clapped softly. "Showing off that fur. Now, how does it feel?"
"Feel?" He turned left and right with swivels of his legs and hips. "They're shorts?"
"Duh." She rolled her eyes. "But you said you're not used to shorts. So how do they feel?"
David grew quiet a moment. "Thanks... for asking." He suddenly snapped his fingers. "Right, I meant to apologize."
"For?" She skewed an ear at him. "Did you do something to or with Sunny? Be honest!"
"No!" No thing that came to mind that could have happened between them seemed good. "She just delivered some smoothies." That Joy had claimed one of. "I meant about us." He waved between himself and Joy. "And Back. I was just riding a high, I think. Forget I said any of that."
Joy wrinkled her nose. "You were feeling your young stallion oats, were you? Well, Back's already gone, so she wasn't that interested." Her tail curled into a question mark, eyes on David steadily. "I'm still here. If we're being completely honest." David tensed. "You're still an alien to me. I can't say you're handsome, or not. You're just odd, not in a bad way, just odd. Worth being a friend with, I'll give that, but not who I want to try making a family with." Her eyes fell. "And I just made you sad."
Damnable betraying tail. "It's fine! Seriously, so very acceptable. It'd be stranger if you said any different." He pointed to her cup, held in a hoof. "How is it?"
"Hm? Oh!" She took a loud slurp from the straw. "Sunny's smoothies are always great! Can't imagine going to somepony else for them. What flavor did you get?"
He took a soft sip of his own, avoiding brain freeze to the best of his ability. "Licorice if you can believe that."
"Brave." She moved to the front counter. "I never tried that." She grabbed a pen and started scribbling. "Gonna make up a schedule for the big day. Thanks for helping! I should point out, once you get paid the first time, you don't need me." She considered her words on the page a moment. "You could go."
"Do you want me to?"
She skewed an ear. "I expected that answer."
"My--"
"Not your tail," she cut off with a sideways wag of her hoof. "I'm not even facing you." She resumed writing. "You are used to not being cared about, I think. Every time somepony does something that involves caring about what you think, it's a surprise. A pleasant surprise, but a surprise." She set the pen down and turned towards David. "Well, too bad. I'm going to keep surprising you."
Well, crud. He was being niced at. The horror. "I'm still an odd alien in your house, useful as I am sometimes."
"Yep." She picked up the paper from behind herself and swung it into view. "Ta da!"
"Maretime Bay Day," it read in bold letters. "First Annual Party Gaming. All ponies welcome." Joy pointed to the vast empty space under the words.
"I think it's missing something. Ideas?"
David hummed. "Well, is this mostly an event to psyche up existing customers, or is it an outreach for new customers?"
"Both?"
"Both is good." He nodded at that. "But pick a focus. What is your goal?"
"Oh, sure, ask the hard ones." She turned the paper back on herself. "Hm... Well, the holiday should attract ponies from all over. My usuals will be happy there is an event at all, no actual need to go extra fancy for them, so let's say it's an outreach. Now what?"
David pointed at the paper in her hooves. "Then we want to sweeten the pot, for them. We want to make it appealing for new gamers, new ponies in the area, and Old ponies who aren't regulars here. So, that tournament idea you had, it's fine, but newbies aren't going to get very far in that."
"I get you." She slapped the paper down and got to writing. "I'll print this up properly when we're done. No need to traumatize the city with my writing." Not that her hoofwriting seemed to be all that bad. "This is going to be great! Thank you for helping. Now... We're home, at last. By the way, where--"
The front window of the store suddenly shattered, glass spilling across the ground as a disc hovered camly in as if it hadn't been involved. "--did you leave the disc?" Joy buried her face in her hooves. "That's going to need fixing... Disc, who's fault is this?!"
The disc calmly floated towards David and came to a halt. "Ah ha!"
David went still.
Joy rapped on the disc, commanding it to stop. "I feel so dumb..." She pulled out her phone and got to tapping. "This is useful though, not gonna lie." Whoever she called answered quickly. "Quickie!" she called with a smile. "Front window just shattered. Need a new one in there. How soon can you do that? Uh huh... Alright. I'll be ready. Thanks so much." She stuffed the phone away. "She'll be here tomorrow morning, not so bad. You're paying half of that."
David blinked softly. "Only half? It's all my fault."
"I was there," scoffed Joy. "I could have thought of the disc. I could have stopped it. I could have done a lot of things, but I forgot about it just like you did. On the positive..." She climbed into the disc, rooting around. "Now we have all our camping supplies back. Sure, most of it won't be that useful here in the city, but still, paid for it, may as well have it." She started unloading things carefully, emptying the disc of its contents. "Can you bring it upstairs?"
"Sure." David grabbed the tools one armful at a time, up and down the stairs in a hurry. "Really sorry about that."
"I already said it was just as much my fault." She half-pushed a sleeping bag out to flop to the floor. "We were both dumb, and we pay the consequences."
David grabed a new arm full of stuff and got moving. "Well, let's make this holiday work."
"Yeah!" She hopped free of the disc. "Now you're talking. By the way, you are going to be known as 'the human' a lot. I bet they've been talking about you while we were gone. Be ready for that."
"I don't plan to act differently..." He wrang his hands together on the way to grabbing the last set of stuff to haul upstairs. "Just me, David. The guy that keeps the computers working so they can play games."
David flipped through his book. Not one he held, or accessed with a mouse. He was flipping through the one in his head. "It's pretty obvious you're not all real..." The teleport had failed entirely. "But I don't know... Oh!" He descended the stairs into the busy computer shop, waving at some of the customers that recognized him and waved in kind.
Joy noticed him emerging. "There you are! Joining us?"
"I was going to go for a short jog." He shuffled on his still new hooves. "Alright?"
"Sure it is. Don't go more than a block away, please. I worry about you."
David patted her shoulder. "You care." A compliment, at least for him. "I won't, promise." He almost-jogged out onto the sidewalk. "Alright, let's try this. First, the control." He walked at a purposeful rate to the corner. "Test begin." He broke into a proper jog right back the way he came, passing the store at an energy bouncing. "Run forward, not up." He realized something as he ran. He had regained that ability. "Crap..." It was a little thing, not being able to run properly, but he had regained that. "Keep it steady. Jogging..."
He arrived at the end of the block, sore, winded, but he had made it. "I'm better!" He thrust a hand up, clenched in a victory pump. The other rested on his side as he slowly regained his breath. "Alright..." He turned back around, glaring at the sidewalk as if a challenge. "This time..." He wasn't in a hurry, waiting for his body to recover entirely from his first jog.
The pain of the run faded away. His heart had slowed along with his breath. Everything felt like it had come back to a rest. "Let's try this." He broke into a jog, but his thoughts went elsewhere, to the imagination of his inside. He needed more oxygen to get in. He needed more carbon dioxide to get out. The smooth exchange between his working muscles and the blood, from there through the heart, pumping with the precision of millions of years of evolution to his lungs, one more exchange to get the good in and the bad out. Nice and smooth, all working the way it was designed to by random chance, luck, and sticking with what worked by the sheer stubborn nature of evolution.
It was code done with no manual, and keeping what happened to work, over and over and over countless times. He was nothing, just nudging it a step forward, one step after millions. A tiny thing, but even a 1% improvement was a lot of improvement. Countless more oxygen atoms in. Countless more CO2 out. His body was a fine tuned machine, or so he envisioned.
He returned his attention to what he was doing. "Oops..." He had run right past the end of the block, and arrived near the water. If he kept going for too much longer, he would have crashed into the guard rail, or hopped over it and then into the water. "Huh..." But none of that mattered. He didn't feel sore. He smiled as he twirled around back towards the store. He wasn't sore! His breath was coming right back down rapidly, as if that had been a little spring across a room. "Yes..." He had magic! "Excuse me?"
The mare he had addressed glared death at him. "Are you going to run into me again?!"
Oh no, had he? "Sorry! I didn't mean to. You alright?"
"No thanks to you." She turned her nose up. "Watch whatever you're doing instead of that thing on your head."
Wait. "What brings that up?"
"It was glowing as you were just charging through anything in your way," she huffed. "Cut it out! Damn unicorns." Posey took a sharp turn, leaving that street with angry grumbles left in her wake.
David continued his way back to the store, imagining the various ways he might have crashed through people and chastising himself for much of the way. He had to pay attention when he was... Oh, a chance. He broke into a jog back towards the shop but kept his focus on the sidewalk ahead of himself.
He could see the glow, out of the corner of his eye. His horn was glowing with the effort of keeping him running at optimal efficiency. "Awesome." Until it wasn't. It flickered and died without warning or reason. "Hm?" He paused in even a walk to reach up and poke at the horn dubiously. It resumed its glow for equally ungiven reasons and he was able to finish the jog home. "Strange."
"There you are." Joypad spotted him coming back in, prompting a round of waves and cheers from the regulars. "I got a call."
She sounded upset. David wasn't sure what at. "Something bad?"
"Well, maybe.. This human was seen more than a block away, knocking ponies out of the way. What's up with that?" She clapped her hooves together and set her chin on the union. "Did we get another of you, or did you do a bad?"
"Oooo," echoed the room, the drama between them suddenly more interesting then the computers they were in front of.
David tensed, caught red handed. "I didn't mean to, promise. I was practicing some magic and ended up way over that way." He pointed the way. "I hear I might have bumped into some on the way, but only one was upset about it."
"Was it Posey?" Joy arched a brow. "It'd make sense. She was the one that called me, asking me to 'keep my strange unicorn under control.'"
"I didn't get her name." Or he forgot it? That was a possibility. "Sorry."
"You're back and safe." She lowered her hooves to the counter. "That's the most important part. Don't run ponies over! That's rude."
"Yeah." Not much argument to be had against that. "I'll get back to work." It was a fine time to check the computers over for any troubles. He wandered up and down the aisles, checking in with ponies and their games to see if anything could be going wrong.
Another mare wandered up to Joy. "He's like the foal you never had."
Joy blinked. "What?"
"Him." The mare pointed at the wandering David. "You're mothering him, not that either of you seem to mind."
Joy colored in a swift coloring. "I am not! I'm just caring... I... He does like being cared about, and I like... I..."
The mare rolled a hoof. "You?"
"I like caring? He needs a hoof, and I have a spare..." She grabbed a pen. "You going to be at the party game day?"
The mare smiled brightly. "Oh, yes, for sure. Gonna try to drag some of my friends over. They never got into games, but that looks fun, and it's newcomer friendly!"
Joy took down her name. "See you then. It'll be fun!" The two met, hooves clopping. "Not that you're not welcome before then."
"They'd have to chase me away." The mare wandered back to her station with a smile.
David crouched down next to a pony focused on their game. "Love this one."
The pony perked an ear at the new voice. "Huh? Yeah... Picked it up a few days ago..." He moved a mouse with his hoove, clicking with a tilt of that same hoof. "But this part gets me."
"Elements."
"Hm?" The pony peeked up and to the left at David, jumping. "Oh! The human. I was not expecting that. Uh, elements?"
David nodded. "Elements. This game insists you use the right elements, or grind forever and a day. And who has time for that?"
"Not me!" agreed the pony. "But your party is easier and powerful with a balance..."
"That's what they want you to think." David wagged a finger. "It's like the games I used to play back home. The elemental advantage is too big to say no to. This level is all ice, so bring earth elemental and you'll clean house."
"Huh..." The pony returned to his gaming, even if he was assembling a team of earth heroes to take out that boss that was keeping him from progressing. "Thanks."
"Glad to help." David rose back to his full height and resumed his patrol.
One of his favorite colts let out a cheer as his go-kart slid into the finish line, claiming first place. "Good job." He got a balled fist out just in time to meet the excited hoof coming at him. Kids. "You're good at that one."
"I like RPGs and all, but a racing game is where it's at." Pipster's tail wagged eagerly. "Can't wait until I'm old enough to try real go-carts."
Huh. "What age are ponies allowed to try that?"
"Depends on your parents," sighed out the colt. "Mine said I had to wait a few years. I bet you'd let me!"
If he was the parent? Probably.... but he didn't share that. "I'm sure they have your best in heart."
"Yeah yeah... 'Course they do... Still a bummer." He stuck out his tongue as he started the next course. "At least I can be good in the games. Prepare to go down!"
David watched him go, taking the corners with obvious skill, speeding ever higher. "I could never match that."
"Match me? Probably not, Sir..." He stuck out his tongue a little as he took a tricky maneuver. "But you could get better."
"Not that much, not even a little." He warded off the idea gently with his hands.
The game paused. Pipster turned, his chair swiveling with him. "I'll show you." With a slap of a hoof, he banished the race, going back to the menu. "Start it up." He pointed to the next console over. "I'll show you how!"
David couldn't think of a smooth way to reject the idea without coming off as rude to the little colt. He didn't want to hurt Pipster's feelings. He surely only meant well. "I promise nothing."
He sat down though and Pipster hopped over, hoof on one of David's hands. "Alright, let's get started." Pipster eagerly began a lesson in how to play the game. "After you're alright at it, we're racing!" Oh no, stakes. "Don't worry. Losing to me doesn't even count." He looked quite proud of that fact. "So just have fun!"
Despite his assurances that he wasn't great at those games, and a slow reaction time, he was getting better under the enthusiastic cheering calls of the colt that refused to give up on him. "You are at least decent," announced Pipster with a firm nod. "I have to go home or my parents will be super mad at me." He pointed at the console. "You keep practicing, at least two races a day! I'll know if you're skipping." He pointed at his eyes, then David in a promise of keeping an eye on things. "Have fun!" And off he galloped from the store.
Joy moved to the window, flipping the sign over to let others know they were closed as she locked things up. "You two looked like you were having fun."
David tried his best to not look embarassed, with limited success. "He insisted on showing me the racing game. I am now, and I quote, 'decent'. Which is still more than I would have guessed if you'd asked me before I started."
"Nopony asked you." She clicked off about half the lights, making things gloomy, but still visible. "Nopony can guess how good they are at something until after they give it a real try. Good on Pipster, dragging you into it. So... Enjoy it?"
"I've had worse afternoons. Right now..." He pointed to the stairs. "I want to see what happens next and let you play."
"Threatening me with a good time? How bold." She started up the stairs at a prance. "C'mon. Dinner first, then we can see what the next exciting plot reveal is. No spoilers here, promise."
Joy crashed next to David. This was a curious thing. He had his own spot, and she had her bed. The two were not next to each other. He said nothing. It was her house, er, store. She owned it, he was freeloading on her kindness, even if money was in the future, maybe.
It was hers, so if she wanted to crash there, well... Who was he to tell her not to? That didn't make it any less awkward. They were going through all the night routines. They were at the part where they flopped into their proper places, turned off the lights, said 'goodnight', and went to bed.
She hadn't done that. She had flopped next to him. She didn't even say goodnight! Alright, that was a smaller part of the problem. Why was she right there? He thought of why she'd be there. She didn't seem to be sick, that was good. She did seem a little tense. Why was she tense? "Worried about the Bay Day?"
"Yeah." She nestled in against him. "This one's bigger than all the other ones... There'll be more ponies there than ever before..."
Yes, his empathy was still in working order. "You'll nail it, promise. I'll help."
"Thanks." She nuzzled into his neck. "You are so strange..." Not strange enough to avoid nuzzling, but enough to mention.
The physical intimacy was not something he was used to! "Um..." He meant to say more than that, but words were failing him. "You alright?"
"No." Joy propped up on one elbow. "I am not. I'm stressed out and my head won't shut up!"
"Now time is sleep time." He slid an arm under her hesitantly, but she seemed to be alright with it, so he continued, offering his arm as a pillow. "Time to catch those Zs before they get loose and we end up with some Ys or something. Don't want that."
Joy pawed at him, battering him with soft presses of the flat of her hooves. "Stop that!" But she was laughing, flopping to the ground and letting out a sigh. "Thanks."
"What for?"
"For not freaking out?" She touched her furry snout to his cheek. "You have intimacy issues."
He couldn't rightly argue that. "And you do not."
"Not really. Now, sleep." All too quickly, her breathing was slow and even, and little Zs began to lift from her.
This left David with an arm pinned and caught under the pony. Such was his fate. He could think of worse places to be. Visions of his dog, a world away, came to mind. Little fuzzball was an awful companion in a bed, sleeping on, under, or anywhere he wanted to be if allowed in the room at all at night. But he could get to sleep with the critter, and, gosh darn it, he would get to sleep with the anxious mare.
He closed his eyes and took slow breaths. "Hey pony." His phone chimed. "Play sleep music." And lo did it obey, playing quiet music to fill the silence. With the lullaby, he drifted off to sleep as he had wanted.
He awoke to a hoof pressed against his face, covering most of it. "Mmf?" He scrambled away from it and to his hooves in a clip-clopping hurry. "Joy?"
"Good morning," she called with a smile. "You are a good pillow, just to toss out there. Breakfast is ready. Fuel up! Today's the big day." She trotted away, tail raised with spirit.
Sleep far away from his mind, he got to work, which did not include breakfast, even if he snagged a dry bit on the way past to chew on the way down the stairs. "Let's do it."
Joy popped up beside him with his abandoned plate. "That was not optional. Eat." She pushed it against him. "You'll regret it later if you don't."
Properly chastised, he sat at a terminal to hurriedly chow down his food as Joy went about opening the store for Bay Day gamers. "Do you think ponies will come? They might get distracted with all the other things going on..."
"Whether they do or not." David rose, carrying the plate to a safe place. "We'll be ready. I'll challenge you to pony karts if there's nothing else going on."
"You're going down." Joy smirked with a laugh. "Alright, let's throw it open!" She hurried to the door, flipping the sign from closed to open on the way. "Welco--" She didn't get to finish that. The moment she opened the door, she was pushed right aside as ponies milled in with bright smiles. "--me... David's at the counter if you don't already have a card!"
There he was, waving at them with a smile. "Form a line nice and orderly and we'll get you ready to take part in the day's fun." He began running through ponies in a hurry, taking bits, or cards, as needed to get them a play card that let them access the computers and consoles. "You can get a Maretime Bay Day only card that's only for today, cheaper, but, again, just for today. Great for ponies just visiting."
Many ponies went for that, but many did not, electing to pay for the month-pass cards instead, or the pay-as-you-go models. It didn't matter much in that moment, just that David quickly grabbed their payment and got them into the system as quickly as possibly, which he was doing as rapidly as he could. "Here you go. Have fun!"
Joy moved to the front of the room. "The first game will be Dirt Digger!" The screen behind her showed the pony with a big shovel that was the mascot of that game. "Everypony that gets down to the bottom of level 3 gets a free can of soda to keep their energy up for the next game!" It wasn't a competition. Everyone could win that one, in theory.
She blew into a whistle with a sharp trilling twee, signaling the start. The computers that weren't already loaded into Dirt Digger loaded themselves into the right game, ready to take part in things, and the ponies got to manically digging their little virtual pony into the dirt as they laughed and called encouragingly to each other.
The day was going well. "What was I worried about?" Joy clopped her hooves in a slow but steady beat. "This is great! Look at all those happy faces."
A pegasus was using two hooves and wings at once to pull off tricks that didn't seem possible for earth pony players with but their two hooves. A unicorn spotted the trick and their horn glowed, emulating the trick with their magic.
This did not sit well with some of the earth pony players. "They're cheating!" complained one stallion to Joypad, pointing over at the players making better progress than the others.
"This isn't a competition," she assured, waving down with her hooves. "The only pony that can be 'cheated' is yourself."
The earth pony hiked a brow. "Until they break your computers with their wings and magic."
Joy swallowed nervously at the idea. "Keep your hooves on the consoles," she called out. "And everything else away from it, please."
Annoyed noises rose, but the playtime continued. "Hm." His legs itched. It was easy enough to ignore at first, but it didn't stop, and David was working his nails through his new pony fur. "C'mon." He had managed that long without being annoyed at his fur pelt. Why would that day be any different? But the itch refused to go away.
"Hey!" Pipster was grinning at David widely. "Gonna be in the Pony Kart match? You better say yes! I did not train you for nothing!" He leveled a hoof at David. "You don't gotta win, but you better try!"
Well... How was he going to turn down that call to action? "I'll be there." He met Pipster's hoof with a balled fist. "Who knows, maybe I'll win."
"I'll owe you a prize if you do." Pipster ran off to rejoin the game without a chance for replies.
A cold cylinder pressed against him. Joy was pushing a soda can against him. "You get one free for helping run this. Your favorite, and diet."
He turned the bottle to see what flavor it was. Diet Doctor Wibb. Was it? He popped it open and took a sip, yep! It was a knockoff of a familiar drink of another doctor that he liked. "How did you even know?!"
"There's a reason I'm the boss." Joy winked dramatically. "Five minutes," she shouted. "Get to the bottom of level three to score that soda!" She started down the aisles, noting who had reached it and delivering sodas along the way. "Such great players! If you don't make it, don't feel bad. We're all new at one point."
An earth pony chuckled, a local regular. "Bottom of 3? That's so easy."
A pegasus joined in the chortle, covering her mouth with a hoof. "Seriously. I can make level 10 with my eyes closed."
A unicorn pouted, having only tried the game that day. "I'm doing my best!"
Joy snuck that unicorn a soda with a hoof raised to her lips in a shh of a noise. "You're all winners today, for being here, where all the fun's at!" She hopped up at the front of the room as the old mascot vanished from the display, replaced with a picture of a pony hiding fearfully in a hole in the middle of a battlefield. "But now, a special challenge. Find the pony, with a special pony to find. Stand up!"
David knew his cue, rising for the crowd, itchy legs or not. Ugh, his tail was starting to itch too. What timing!
Joy was ignorant of his discomfort. "David, our local human, will be the hiding pony! All of you--" She waved widely over the entire room. "You'll be hunting him. Now, to make this fair for him, I've given him an hour to set up devious traps and hide himself away. This is a cooperative run. Can you find him? If any of you tags David, you win!"
The room exploded in cheers as they dropped into the virtual world en masse and began scrambling around, looking for David's virtual avatar. With a great kaboom, one pony got painted with simulated paint, coloring their avatar a new shade. "He's been here," cried the mare. The hunt was on.
And his butt itched. Dang it. He had to pay attention to the game. Not all his traps would go off automatically, and he had to race his little avatar between peeking points to trigger them for maximum effect. "Can you find me?" he taunted the room full of eager equine hunters. "I found a really good spot."
He felt... disconnected? Like he was controlling himself about as far as he had been controlling his avatar in the game, divorced from it. On the positive, it meant the itching was a status, a flashing light, instead of something he was experiencing. On the other hand, it was pretty strange. He could still play the game, two layers of seperation. What was going on?
David was back in his body, as if nothing had happened. Dang a pony had gotten past one of his traps. An alarm went off quietly, but not quietly enough.
"I think I found it!" The room became excitement as they found the entrance to David's lair. They just had to get through all the traps.
David glanced at the clock on the wall. There was half an hour to go. With the room full of seekers hunting for him, could his fortress stand up for it? He had his doubts. He heard an explosion. "Ah! He got me!" cried a stallion, making a dramatic death pose as he went to waiting to respawn. "Go on... without me."
Huh. His tail wasn't itchy anymore. Hirrah for small blessings at least.
He had to move! He got his avatar into motion, a pony. Not every game was sporting a wide variety of species to play as. He was playing Rough Draft, or a mock simulation of the earth-brown earth pony that was his creation. Down that path, take a right, Oh! David squeaked in surprise as a big flashing banner popped on his screen. He'd been tagged!
"You win!" called out Joypad to the cheering room. "Great job, everypony. Next game!" And the event continued without David.
Which was just as fine, the way he saw it. He scampered off to the little foal's room and slapped the door shut behind himself. The itching was gone, but something felt... wrong. He reached down to pat around the area and it became clear quickly. No fur. He had no fur. The basic shape was right, but there was no fur, not even a human level of fuzz. "What...?" How had he not even left a trail of dropped fur on the way?
He didn't remember any mess on the chair when he left it. Where else could the fur have gone? Either way, he was a plucked chicken, er, pony, at least from the hips down. "Damn it..." He wasn't much for cursing, especially where anyone else could hear him, but in that moment, in the privacy of the bathroom, it felt proper. "What even...?" He still had a tail, but barely a tail, a little short limb with no hair, it barely qualified. Ponies didn't have big tails, if one discounted the fur additions.
None of that helped him. A clop came from the door. Crap! "Sec."
"I was hoping I saw you come this way." It was Joypad. "Everything alright?"
No! But would he say that? She had enough on her plate. She didn't have room for his nonsense.
But that was... That was his programmed state talking. She was a pony, a wonderful and kind one. Maybe just... saying what was wrong, like an adult, was best. He reached for the doorknob and opened it a crack, drawing her in the moment some of her snout appeared.
"Woah hey!" Joypad didn't fight that hard to avoid being pulled in. "This is an emergency, right? Nopony's out there right now."
"No fur." He gestured at his bare legs, covered in nothing but his shorts.
It was like only then did she see it, as if she just couldn't see it before. "Woah! What happened!" She waved dramatically at his shorn legs. "Is his medicine wearing off or what? Does it hurt?! Should I call it off?"
"Call wha--" It hit him. "No! We're gonna have a great day, bad hair day or not. It doesn't hurt, just confusing as hell. Let's get back out there and get back to things."
"If you're sure..." She nudged the door open. "But if you start to feel any worse, even a little, go relax. Go sleep. Go do anything that isn't working!" She burst from the bathroom. "Time for the next game!"
David emerged a short time after her, when the eyes would be on her. However odd things were going, he could only feel... good, at least about Joy. She cared. She kept showing it by offering it. Not by saying it, that was easy, too easy. Anyone could say nice things, but she was ready to throw away her assistant when she needed them most, if it kept them safe. She was ready to just call the whole thing off, bits be damned.
She cared, and she was ready to show it.
And it was about him. He sat with a bit of a silly smile. To have that kind of emotion tossed in his direction was just... Well, it was great. He looked to the panel behind her to get a gauge of what game was being played and, with that, where they were in the schedule. They were making great progress! Pony Karts was coming up. He went to take his place, and none of the ponies seemed to notice or care about his odd state.
It was time to play some karts! He was a bit of an oddball. He had multiple contact points, like the pegasi weren't allowed to do and the unicorns were forbidden. He had an unfair advantage. Good thing he was also a middle-aged guy that didn't play racing games too much. They stomped him flat, but he put in a decent showing, with Pipster's guidance allowing him to not be entirely shameful.
"Nice try," gushed the little colt, practically vibrating with excitement. "You took that second turn so well! You did everything I said. Aw, shoulda won." He kicked at nothing. "But you tried really hard, I'm proud of you!" As if he were in a position to claim any ownership of David. "Keep practicing and I bet you'll be a pro. Maybe, one day, you'll be a challenge for me."
David reached to ruffle Pipster's mane. "Don't you want to be in the next game?"
"Nah. It's a first person game, not my favorite. Let them have fun." His tail was wagging excitedly despite that. "Hey, wanna go see what else they're doing for Bay Day?"
Tempting! "I really shouldn't. Joy's relying on me to help keep all the machines humming until the big day's over. You could take some pictures for me?" David wasn't much of a picture person, but the idea of Pipster taking some and being mindful of his experience seemed nice. "Got a camera?"
Pipster produced his phone with a video game effect.
One echoed by David into a victorious fanfare. "Perfect! In fact, what's your number?" He dug out his and soon sent a text over to Pipster. "Now you can send me pictures as you take them."
"Yay!" He ran right out of the computer room. Apparently the pony kart game was all he had been waiting for. A chime alerted David to a new message, showing a huge puffy cotton candy. An emoji showed after that of a pony with hearts for eyes.
"Don't spoil your appetite," David typed. "But have fun!"
A new picture appeared of... Was that a hole in... the road? In reality? There were panicking ponies, caught mid-shot. David sat up sharply. He slapped the call button and pressed the phone to his head. "Pip?"
"David, sir. It's kinda scary out here! Ponies are screaming." He could hear them in the background. "What should I do?"
Crap, he'd just sent the colt out there. "Leave that area, get away from--"
"I can't! My hooves are stuck!"
"What?" David tried to stand up, and failed spectacularly. His hooves were also stuck to the ground, glued there by glowing magic as were all the other earth ponies there. Any joy in gaming was being rapidly replaced with panicked shouts. Crap... "Don't panic." He still had Pip on the phone. "How far away is that hole I saw?"
"About half a block, sir." He sniffed sadly. "Can you use your human magic, sir?"
Did he have a spell that'd help? Not while he was glued to the floor. "You'll have to use your awesome colt magic."
"I don't have colt magic!"
"Yes you do," assured David, the world around him becoming panic about as much as the noises through his phone. "Take deep breathes and stay calm. I'm still here. I'm here."
"Y-you're here," came his little frightened voice. "The hole's coming closer, Sir..."
"Deep breathes. You're not alone." That seemed clear, he could hear a lot of ponies with both Pip and himself. Speaking of... He looked around quickly. All the earth ponies were stuck to the ground, Joy included. What was going on? "Everyone, chill," he thundered at the room as a whole. "This is annoying, but not dangerous. We're here to play games, and we still can."
Joy peered at him with confusion, but there was a point there. "Game time is now free until you can leave. Only fair! For all ponies, earth or not!" She tried to move to the front, to actually do that, but she was still glued, huffing as she pulled and tugged. "I'll backdate that when I get up there, promise."
Two pegasi came in at Joy from the left and right, pulling her up between them with a pop. Liberated, they carrried her on swift wings to the front. Sure, she got stuck the moment they put her down, but she could type, with her nose, making the games properly free. "Thanks for the assist! Free game time is now officially begun! Let's have some fun and not let this little thing get in the way."
"Sir?"
David perked at the voice on the phone, too small. "I'm here! You alright, Pip?"
"It's getting closer... It's getting closer and I can't move. I keep trying and it's not working. I'm... I'm trying..." His attempts to keep his breathing regulated were entirely lost in favor of frantic gulps of air. "Sir? Please help!"
David wanted to! He wanted to just teleport to the foal's side and keep him safe, but that wasn't a talent he had. "Be strong, Pip! I'm here with you, I promise."
"It's here, oh no, it's here!" The voice turned into a panicked wailing. "Help!" he cried, wind rushing past. Pip was falling... Into that hole?
David slammed a fist against the desk of the computer he was seated at. "God damnit..."
The screaming was getting quieter? Had something happened? Was pipster hurt?! He couldn't know. He had to know! David's heart thumped wildly in his chest. "Pip?!" But no reply was coming, just the sound of rushing wind, then nothing at all. His phone reported the call had ended.
He pulled at his captured hoof, but it refused to come free, no matter which he struggled against. "You alright?" asked a pony sitting next to him. "It's not so bad, oh!" Their hooves came loose, and so did David's. All of them were free with no reason given, just... it happened.
David scrambled to his hoo-- What? He didn't have hooves. Freed of the clinging gunk, he had his feet back, and his legs, for that matter. He reached for his head to... nope, horn gone too. He was a human, a perfectly regular male human. On the positive, his back remained pain free. "Joy!"
Joy looked over at him from her conversation. "Wha--" She saw what had happened to him, her eyes wide. "Does it hurt?"
"No, but I gotta go. You'll be alright?" He took a step for the door. When she nodded, he sprinted, without shoes, onto the road and just ran. He ran to where that first camera photo was taken, where the scenery matched. But Pipster wasn't there, just a bunch of relived ponies milling around.
"Pip! Pipster, where are you," he called, hands at his mouth to funnel his voice as best he could. "Tell me you're okay!"
He almost fell over, something crashing into him,and hugging one of his re-humanized legs. He looked towards it and gasped with surprised joy. "Pip!" He put a hand on the colt's head, laughing a little hysterically. "You're alright... What happened? Tell me!"
"I fell... I fell... And I was so scared... I knew you were there. That was the only thing I had..." Pipster squeezed David's leg all the tighter. "But then pegasi... They caught me and brought me to a safe place... And the hole closed up. I dropped my phone! I dropped it and I couldn't hear you anymore... You were still with me, right?"
David dropped to a knee as quickly as he could get enough space from the clinging Pipster. "Of course, that's why I'm here. I had to see you, safe. I'm so..." He had been ready to cry, but that was gone. The emergency was over, and Pipster was safe. A happy ending. "Thank goodness..."
"David!" Sunny had spotted him and was walking over. "Wow, crazy huh? Uh..." She noticed he was looking a bit different. "Huh... This day's left a mark on more than one of us."
"Bye!" Joy waved at the last pony heading out the door. The moment they were through it, she rushed over to click the lock into place. "And done..." She sagged against it with a loud huff. "But we did it..." She twirled as she fell, coming down in a seat facing David bonelessly. "Now... Two things!" She raised but one hoof. "Maybe three... One! Dinner. We both deserve a nice one. On me. Haven't counted the bits, but pretty damn sure we can afford something nice, so get to ordering."
David was quietly picking up trash and debris left behind by the manic day of gaming. "You sure you want me to pick? Pony cuisine has proven alright so far, but you're still trusting your dinner to an alien."
"Whatever." Joy waved that away with an angry snort. "You're just picking the place. I can order my own thing once you do that. Second thing! You sure you're not, like, in stoic agony over there?"
David shook one leg and the other to be sure. "All operational. I was surprised, sure, but otherwise alright?" He dug out his phone and got to browsing various restaurants that delivered. "I'm in the mood for pasta."
"Pasta!" she cried in shared enthusiasm. "Sounds great! Order two of whatever. I am too tired to think until there's food in this belly. Three! You ran off like your tail was on fire, which you don't have anymore? What was that about?"
David tapped at the phone busily, getting that going. "Pipster got caught up in The Hole situation. You hear about it?"
"What? Hole?"
So David got to catch her up on the chaos that had bookended the stuck to the floor situation. "Once they stopped fighting and started being civil, the magic came back and the hole closed up."
"Wow." Joy clonked a hoof to the side of her head. "Glad that's sorted. And here we were, just kinda annoyed. Hm. That tournament style play was fun for the holiday, but I don't think I'm up for that repeatedly, so back to solo play!"
David smacked the last button, summoning the food. "I have it set so they'll want to be paid when they get here."
"Great!" Joy managed to get back up to her hooves. "Pip's alright?"
"Scared but fine." David let the phone thunk next to a computer, not feeling up for holding it. "Which is the running theme of today."
"Right?! Seriously..." Joy took a step towards him, but paused. "If I walk away from this door, I have to walk right back when the food gets here. You're already standing, bring me some bits from the register?"
"Sure." He slid around the counter, easier to do on smooth tile with bare feet. With a few presses, the drawer popped open at him and he fetched a few bits. "Won't this throw off your count later?"
"A little." She did not seem that upset. She accepted the bits when offered and stuffed them away into her pony pockets. "Now, seriously... You're acting like nothing happened. I wasn't even the one things were happening to and I feel like I care more."
"It's a net positive." He flopped down to his butt there next to her. "All human, but minus back pain, hirrah. I'm just sad I lost the magic I had."
"Prove it."
David raised a brow at that. "It came from the horn, which I don't have."
"I call horse apples! You just got that horn. If it was all the horn, there's no way you'd already be doing cool things with it. Unicorns took longer to figure out what little they knew."
David scowled at the logic. "And you only bring this up now because..."
"Because now it matters, and before it did not." She counted on her dancing hoof with two beats. "The magic was you, I think? Prove me right, or wrong. Either way, prove it!" She jumped as a clopping started at the door. "Coming!" She forced her way to a stand and soon had a bag full of food. "Dinner's on! I'd ask you to carry me upstairs, but that's a big ask. You're as tired as..." She trailed off as David went to try to heft her up anyway. "Woah hey!" She flopped over his back weakly as he took a shaking stand. "This is an awful idea! What about the food?"
"I'll come back for it." He made slow progress to the stairs, but he was moving, with her. "Got a new spine, may as well abuse it."
"No!" She beat on his head with her hooves. "I am not asking you to do that!"
"Too bad." He half-fell onto the stairs and started climbing them on all fours. That proved faster than the slow two legged trundle to them.
She scrambled off him when they reached the top. "Yay! Now never do that again!"
"Right right." He went right back down, returning with the bag of carted food. "Food!"
There was no disagreement there. They sat at their dinner table and got to chomping down food. "Stop that." Joy waved a fork laden with pasta at David. "You just got a new one, no breaking it over again. I swear, it's alright for a friend to be dissapointed once in a while. I've made it up those steps when I was tired before, promise."
"I don't..." He trailed off, considering his words. "If I can help, I want to."
Joy chomped that fork clean. "You are just as tired as me. You can't help, so saying no is the right decision. If I get angry at that, not much of a friend." She ate contently, but noticed David looked uncomfortable. "Did... somepony treat you like that, before?"
He turned one hand up. "Without ever actually saying it."
"Well, that... That was then. This is now." She put a hoof on her chest. "And in Joypad's joy pad, ponies are allowed to say yes or no and not be called out just for being tired! Besides, I'm not a little thing... And you're not super strong, besides... Don't do that." She wriggled a nose with a growing smile. "I'll put in a catch. You have to say why you're saying no. I doubt you'll ever have a really bad reason, and 'I'm tired right now' is usually good enough unless it's an emergency."
"Right..." He fell back into quiet with some quality devouring time. "Sorry. I know I'm making this awkward."
"Did you live alone?" She peered at him with a new thought.
"No! Actually... I lived with family."
"Oh... That's about as bad sometimes." Joy set her fork down. "They asked you for things, and you gave them."
"If I could?"
"And if you couldn't, you figured out a way to." She steepled her hooves. "The only family you have now is me, and I'd rather a happy David. Oh! Right! I almost forgot."
"Forgot what?" David was still eating. That food was good! The joy of fresh... everything. Sheesh, did they make it all just before cooking it?
"After you get your first gig and pay your share of rent, I'm firing you." She waved at David's startled expression. "I'm not kicking you out. I just want you to get back to what you like doing. You're helping me because you have to, even if you're good at it. You said you were a writer, right? So write! You can use a computer if you like, or I can get you a notepad. Either way. Hey, what'd you write anyway?"
"Stories about fantastical situations, sometimes involving aliens on new worlds, sometimes transforming along the way, physically or otherwise?" He rolled a hand as he spoke, describing his genre. "And game rules. A lot of game rules. I won't be writing that without learning what the local games are and then learning them." He chuckled at the thought. "That'd take a while. Do ponies like fantasy?"
She cocked a brow and pointed to the game console. "We're playing that and you ask if we like fantasy. I'm going to pretend I didn't even hear you."
"That is a yes." He danced a finger in the air. "Is there a site where ponies trade fiction?"
"I dunno." She pulled out her phone and got to tapping with her hoof. How typing worked with a big heart-hoof, David was still not 100% on, but she was managing it. "A search for 'story site' comes up with a lot of hits. Looks like you can buy books online pretty easily, but why do that when there's a book store just down the street?"
Ah, book stores... "I should check that too... But that's a lot of missing steps. How do ponies make money online, usually?"
Joy waggled her phone. "I hear some of them get like tons of views making videos and that turns into bits, somehow... Your face is owned by Pegasoft. They'll probably get angry if you start posting videos besides what they ask for."
David set aside the idea of becoming a famous Ponytuber. "I'll have to look around. I'll promise you this." Joy perked at his words and he smiled in kind. "I'll search, tomorrow, and see what options are open. This is an alien world, and I like it, but that doesn't mean I know it. I'm having fun being your assistant."
"I know that." She swatted at his shoulder in light buffets of her hooves. "And I like having you around and I want you to stay if you want to stay, but you should be doing what you want. And if you happen to help with a problem on the side, bonus!"
He took her hoof suddenly, cradling it in his hands. She colored, peering at him with confusion. He raised the hoof and kissed the back of it and gently released the limb.
"Um." Joy tucked the hoof away. "I thought you said to pretend all that stuff you said never happened. What was that?"
David worried his fingers together in knots. "The last time I was even kinda dating someone, I kissed their hand, and they dumped me right after."
Joy's ears danced. "So you kissed my hoof?! Why?!" She threw her hooves wide. "It didn't work last time!"
"I... It's a test I guess." He glanced furtively around, anywhere but at Joy's face at that moment.
Joy squinted at him. "You want to see if I dump you? Well, I'm not, alien! I can't dump what isn't my boyfriend. You're a friend, a regular friend. A good one, both ways I hope?" She looked to him for a hint, and he nodded. "Good! Now, if you want smooching rights, you'll have to gain a few levels, and I'll tell you when you get there, so no more smooches before then."
David chuckled with relief. "I can't express how happy I am that you casually toss in RPG references into serious conversations."
"Blame it on being a gamer." She hopped down from her chair with a clop and started for the living area. "Speaking of that, we paused right before a good part. You want to continue? 10... 9..."
She was counting down like an arcade. David laughed on realizing this and made a coin inserted electronic noise. "Let's continue." He took what was left of his food over with him, wolfing down the remainder on the way. "I can't wait to see how they get out of that trap. That town looked innocent, too innocent."
"Right?! Obvious trap." She slapped her console, turning it on. "But how do they get out?!" Not that she didn't already know. She had beaten the game, but she offered no spoilers. "Only one way to find out." She pressed the start button and got the game going. "By the way, you want to play a little?"
"I'm pretty happy watching you play." David got cozy there on the couch next to Joy. "I'm feeling cozier in general."
He had his shoes back on. No hooves, shoes required. Sure, he had run through the streets on bare feet before, but shoes were more comfortable. Perhaps more surprising was that the ponies had socks and he could jam his feet into them without too much agony.
They did not shape them for a foot and had no heel really. It was like he was wearing a tube, but that was good enough to cover his foot and away he strode with determined steps. Sure, Joypad had kicked him out for a few hours, but he was moving like he had somewhere to be, which he did.
"Comfy Corner," read the sign above the window. Books! New books were arranged temptingly, but others that he could only assume were classics were also in view. Pony classics. He had no idea what qualified for that. Earth pony specific classics? He pushed through the door with a jingle of a bell above it.
"Welcome to Comfy Corner," greeted a male voice. "How..." He paused, actually seeing David. "Woah. Joy's human!"
"That's me." David didn't see much point in arguing that. "And I'm..." He was going to say hungry, but thought better of it. "Do you have game books? Roleplaying?"
"Roleplaying? Roleplaying, hum..." The stallion rubbed at his chin softly, one eye on David even as the other wandered about in a display of the equine ability to look in two directions at once. "Oh!" He broke into a spirited trot up to a bookshelf. "The imagining books."
Imagining books? "Maybe." He reached for a book, but a hoof blocked the way. The stallion was smiling at him, but keeping his hoof right in that path. "Not a library?"
"Got it in one." He drew his hoof back. "You can check them out, but be gentle. We do want to sell these eventually."
"Sure." He took the book without further objection. "Just a matter of which one..." Turned out, ponies did not, as a rule, thirst for adventure. They liked it safe. They liked it comfortable. Their books reflected this with a lot of their RPGs being more about relationships and chasing dreams and most of it avoiding violence, against living things of any kind, including the player having to run through traps. Violence wasn't the pony way, at least not by default.
"Well..." Writing classic adventures felt right out.
"Woah." David jumped at the sudden familiar voice. "Hi, Mister!" It was Pipster, waving excitedly. "What're you doing here? I thought you lived with Miss Joypad?"
"Still do." He waved the latest book he had picked up. "But I'm exploring 'imagining' books. What are you here for?"
Pipster reached up to push the book away from David. "Ew, not that one. That's all girly and stuff!" He ducked down to the first shelf and grabbed a book, thrusting it up at David. "Try this one!"
David set the first book back where he had found it and accepted Pipster's suggestion. Trotting into Peril, it read boldly. The cover was a set of ponies in combat attire, armored vests and helmets and what not. No guns though, despite a lot of modern equipment on them. Their weapons seemed to be old school, along the lines of swords and knives. It was a strange combination. "Huh..."
"Way better, right?" Pipster bounced up and down. "I'm actually not huge into it, but I know some friends who are."
David considered. Honesty had worked more often than not. "Where I come from, I used to write books like this." He tapped at the adventure manual. "The sort of thing you had to be a brave adventurer for."
"You're a writer?!" More surprising than what he wrote, apparently. "Cool. Now you're a writer that's good at racing games." David was not sure he'd rate himself as 'good'. "Gonna write books now? I'll have to read it."
Aw. "That's nice of you, but you just said you weren't very into this kind of thing."
"This kind of thing isn't usually written by a friend, so the rules change." Pipster made a motion as if adjusting lanes in a car. "So why would you look at books if you're just gonna make one yourself?"
David kneeled down, far closer to Pip's level. "That's a real good question. Before you make something, anything, having an example, or a few, is a big help. It tells you what works, and what doesn't. It gives you a framework to start from, and tells you what's expected."
"Huh..." He reached right past David and plucked out another book. "Then you want this one, and that one." Another book joined the first with another following it. "These are the older ones they switched from."
"That's legit a good tip." David tucked them all under an arm. "If your friends are up to being pestered about their game, let me know."
"Pestered? They love rambling about it. If you want to hear it, they will talk your ears off!" Pipster laughed at the mental image. "You sure?"
David tapped a book with a fingertip. "Let me buy these, but, yes. I would love to talk to them."
Pipster suddenly bounced into the air. "Awesome! I get to show off my human friend." And off he went, galloping free of the store with an excited whee.
The shopkeep nodded at David. "You wanted to buy those?"
Ah! "Right..." He dug out a mess of coins of different denominations. "How much are they? And do they have digital wallets around here?"
"Only recently." The shopkeeping stallion pointed to a little device that was, after being pointed out, a place to put a phone or a touchless card to make a payment. "Did you want to use it? You have bits."
David set the coins down in a jangle before they could end up everywhere. "If I have enough."
The shopkeep scanned the three books David also had, causing a price to appear. "And now... we count." And he got to counting the coins, placing them in neat piles by denomination. "Did you count this?"
"I was handed a pile." David shrugged helplessly. "If it's not enough, lemme know." He scratched behind his neck to tend an idle itch.
"Joy's good for it, but this is enough." He pushed a small portion of the coins back at David. "Change! Do you have dice?"
Dice! Right! David snapped his fingers. "Shoot. How do you do this without dice?"
"With difficulty," agreed the shopkeep. "Lucky for you, we have a few sets." He pointed back to the imagining shelf. Dice were low to the ground near the front of it. "I'll keep the amount, you just pick a set." He took back some of the change to cover the cost of the dice. "Have fun."
"You too." Wait. "I mean, have a good day, right?" David claimed his change and headed over to where the dice were hiding. So many colors... it was dazzling to look at them all, but that was not unusual for any random allotment of RPG dice. "This one." He picked a purple and gold set and flipped it in the air, catching it on the way back down. "Thanks for the help!"
David walked with purpose back towards Joy's shop. "Hey." At least until a pony called him, female. Sunny. "We didn't get a chance to talk before."
He slowed to a stop, facing her. "Hey Sunny. Things alright?"
"For me, yes." She looked him over. "For you... maybe? I asked Hitch about you. You had two feet, then two hooves, and now two feet again. You do have feet in there, right?" She poked at his shoes with a hoof. "Not very hoof shaped."
That and he knew she had seen him without any shoes. "Feet. Human feet."
"You are committed to that... I heard about..." She trailed off, eyeing his books. "And now you're reading up about things like that! Is that just what you like? Nevermind that. I'm more worried about you having a bad reaction to magic being wonky. It's fixed now, I think, but if it hurt you, let us know."
"It swapped hooves for feet and I got the best waxing they could have managed. But it didn't hurt and I feel better than I did a few weeks ago, so yay?" He waggled his hands in a Jazz Hands display. "Though thanks, really. It's nice to have someone I barely know caring." That world seemed full of caring folk.
"No problem." She offered a hoof, meeting David's fist in a bump. "We're neighbors. Looking out is a thing we do. Seriously though, you're alright? If I'm being a pest, tell me."
"You're not." It was embarrassing, but the good kind, that she refused to let it go and insisted on checking on him. "Today's project is one of learning. Who says 'grey manes' can't learn a thing or two?"
She considered the books tucked under his arm. "Related to that? The books, I mean."
He flipped one book to where he could see it. "Right, this is one of the older ones. I'm learning what works, what doesn't work anymore, and what the difference is. If it goes well, I can get to writing my own."
"Oh, nice!" She clapped her hooves with a smile. "So you're a writer? I want to see, when you get to that part. Me, you know my job. I sell smoothies. Tasty smoothies! But not really artistic if we think about it. Jelly!"
Someone was jealous of him? "I bet you could write a book if you wanted to."
"Me? No! Not my thing." She laughed as she waved it off. "Doesn't stop me from being jealous though. Ponies, like, hmm, Izzy who can do art just whenever? Jealous, but in a good way. I'll do my part by appreciating what you artistic ponies make."
"I'll..." He trailed off, instead fishing out his phone. "I think..." He found the right app. "Here we go." He held out the device.
Sunny knew what he meant without direct prompting. She got out her own phone. When they touched, both chimed with the exchange of contact. "Perfect! Enjoy your reading, and if you feel funny, tell somepony."
Why was she that interested, even as a nice pony? "Did you talk to Joy?"
Sunny glanced around nervously. "What? As a friend, sure. We talk all the time." She laughed nervously.
Too nervously. "Did she ask you to keep an eye on me."
"No!" she said way too firmly. "Why would she do that? That's silly! Get out!" She waved David away. "I'm just checking in on our local human. Oh!" She suddenly refocused. "Pipster. Thanks for being there for him. I was busy... dealing with all that and all the other ponies. He said you were the only one really there for him while the town was going crazy... So if that isn't a reason to keep a friendly eye on you, I don't know what is."
"He's a good foal." He shook his collection of books. "He helped me find these, and he already wants to do more. We're already even."
"Glad to hear! That's adorable." She clapped her cheeks in her hooves. "Hope it works out."
"It will... And I'm alright. I'll tell Joypad you were looking out, as she asked for."
"Tha-- Hey wait!" She glared at David, but it turned into laughter. "Clever human. You got me. I better get going." She pointed to the sparkling light house. "I live over there if you somehow missed that. You're welcome to stop by. Pretty sure Pipp wants to get you on camera more often. If you want that, come on over."
"My face is already owned." When would they send his first assignment? "But other than that, thanks. Tell Hitch he did a good job finding a place for me. I really appreciate it."
"I'll let him know." She lifted on her spectral wings. "Bye!" And she was gone in a streak.
David landed with a dull thud on his bottom in the chair. He tucked two of the books into a nook between the edge of his station and the monitor, and popped open the third. "I got too used to reading on a screen." Alas, he had those books in physical, so physical would be how he read them.
Still, he did that, scanning rapidly for the 'important' parts. How did one make a character? What statistics did they have and how did they basically function? Did they have classes? Cool, figure out how they worked...
It turned out, in the latest generation of the game, they didn't have classes. You were kinda free to expand in whatever direction you wanted by taking what were essentially feats to reach for what tickled you. Clearly written after the tribes had come together, they had rules for becoming a better flyer or spellcaster. You couldn't take either of those if your character didn't start as a pegasus or unicorn, of course.
No option for alicorn could be found. Maybe a space for David to fill in? There was one thing that bothered him though... He flipped rapidly towards the end of the book, but there were no legal texts to find. Did ponies do legal texts? Probably not unless they had to... Or were Hitch enforcing those laws.
Well dang...
"You look... concerned?" There was Joy, walking up next to him. "What's on your mind?"
"If I can, I'd much rather expand a system that's already used." He tapped at the new book. "But I don't know if that's legal or not. I know the rules back where I come from."
Joy hiked a brow. "Well, you were dropped off by law enforcement... Could just go back and ask? If you check first, then you're in the clear." Joy sat with a smile. "You're off today, so why not?"
David dug out his phone and a few rapid taps later, got it plotting the route towards the police station. "Shouldn't be an issue, just a question."
"Why are you nervous?" Joy was learning him, perhaps too well. He thought he had been bottled up, but she saw right through him. "Hitch isn't like a random cop, trust me. He's, well..." She colored with a little laugh. "Well, to start, he's kind of hot, if you're into stallions. But he's also super nice. He only gets stern when he tries to get a pony doing the right thing, then he's all smiles again."
Handsome stallion that is nice, in pony world. "I'm sure he's alright... Maybe Sprout's there too?"
Joy inclined her head. "Oh right, he did drop you off didn't he? I doubt he'll be there."
"Why not?"
"It was a... thing..." Joy shrugged, leaving off a huge chunk. "You were still getting used to things, so I didn't bring it up."
"Is he alright?! Something happen?" Visions of various terrible possibilities danced in David's mind.
"Nothing like what you seem to be thinking of." Was she a psychic? "He was a naughty pony, and his punishment came down. He's working in janitorial service, away from the whole law enforcement 'thing'. Probably for the best." Joypad tossed her head towards the door. "Go on. I'll keep the store in one piece."
"Alright alright." That he was being tossed out seemed clear enough. But he didn't go straight there, instead gathering his books and half-dancing up the steps. "So sweet." He reminded himself of the pain he was used to feeling, removed. It was like being younger, sorta, at least in one important place. He could ascend the steps in a lively jog and not regret the idea!
He dropped off the books and circled back the way he came, descending the stairs in a rapid thumping of almost-falling that was rapid stair descent. "See you later," he called, getting a wave from Joy and a few other patrons before he emerged onto the sun of Maretime Bay. "Hello, world." There was a lot to be positive about, so he saw no reason to hold that in. "Good to be in you." The city did not reply to his joyous cry. His phone, on the other hand, was quite happy to give directions to the station where wanted posters and other public information was posted on it. Most of the ponies on it looked kinda dopey, as ponies tended to do.
A few looked legit concerning. Stallions and mares with dangerous looks in a variety of ways. For a moment, he wondered about them. What sort of lives had they led that made them be such naughty ponies in what was, overall, a pretty sunny universe. But he wasn't there for that. No.
He pushed into the station proper, just to duck to the left, avoiding a strange sparkling ball of flame that flew out past him. "Woah."
"Sorry." A pony was there, trying to corral a young dragon. "He's late for bed time, aren't you?" He babbled at the child like a mother, encouraging them to wind down. "Be right with you."
David was fine waiting, looking around the station. It looked like any human station, and also very much not one. That it was made for maybe a handful of officers was the start. It was a pony station. "Hey." Oh, Hitch had come over. "I remember you." He clopped his hooves together with a smile. "How's it working out? I hear you're a hit up at Joypad's."
"Hi." Police officer or not, Hitch had been one of the first ponies he had met, and, seeing him, he was reminded of just how harmless Hitch was, at least compared to the rest of what could be called a phobia. "Nice to see you again. Joypad's been super supportive, 10/10."
"That's what I like to hear." Hitch moved towards his desk. "Now, what can I do for you today? You didn't just come by to chat did you? I mean, it's alright if you did, but...?"
David pantomimed a book. He should have brought one! "I have this book, an 'imagining' book." What a name! But trying to rebrand entire genres wasn't the goal. "Is it illegal if I make another book that references and expands on ideas in this book?"
"Oh, hmm..." He reached over to grab a huge book, slapping it down. "It's not often a pony comes along with a real law question." Hitch sounded excited as he began researching, from one book to the next. "You can't claim you wrote the original, or imply it. A disclaimer is a good idea." He flipped right along, searching for something. "Ah, ah ha!" He brought down a hoof. "If you get permission from the original author, then all restrictions are lifted."
Well, that made sense... "How can I find an original author? And what if it's a big company, or the pony is... not there." Dead. That felt like a word he should maybe not use casually. "Are there other ways besides asking, if asking doesn't pan out?"
"Oh, sure." Hitch flipped on and closed the book, reaching for the next. "That's what I was going over at first. Nopony owns words, um. I mean, if I write a book, I own the book. If you copied parts of my book, or the whole thing, I could get upset at you. Rude. Write your own words." He folded his arms with feigned indignation. "But if I write 'The time of the red robin' and you write a book about red robins in a specific place, I have no reason to be upset, even if you mention my work."
David brightened, they were getting somewhere. "What if I wanted to write 'Robins through the ages: Bridlewood', which was pretty obviously made to work with the 'time of the red robin', just specific and expanding on that niche."
"Oooo..." Hitch seemed pleased for the challenge. "That does make it trickier." He threw the book he had back on the shelf and reached for a new one. "Now, in that case, the original pony could get mad. Really, no law against being mad, but they couldn't ask me to help them. It's right on the line." He drew a line through the air with his heart-stamped hoof. "So long as your book adds something new and isn't just a repeat of 'time of the robin', then you're alright."
David hummed a chipper electronic tune of victory as he clapped his hands in one firm strike. "Great! Then I should be able to do what I planned."
"I'd try asking first," suggested Hitch, slipping the books away. "If they say yes, then you don't need to worry about the rest of it. For your protection, I'd get that in writing. You don't want it to come up later."
Ugh, even ponies had contracts... "I'll try that first. So, if I have a book, what's a good way to find the author, or authors?"
Hitch grabbed a book at random and flipped it open. "They usually say who wrote it right here." He pointed to the very first page, where a name was near the title of the book. "Sometimes it's on the cover too, often really. Shouldn't be hard."
"Alright, but then I have a name. How do I translate the name to--" As if beckoned by fate itself, his phone chirped.
Hitch pointed at the beep. "That should help. Alright, thanks for the challenge." He hopped to his hooves. "Have fun writing. You're a writer huh? I would not have guessed."
"What do I look like?" asked David with obvious curiosity.
"Uh... Not a pony," he tepidly started. "You're tall..." At least compared to a pony. "Um... Shoot, shoved my hoof right in that one. I really didn't know," he admitted with a sag. "Don't be mad. I was curious, and now I know! Good luck with your book!"
David shot a thumbs up and turned for the door, but a thought came. "Oh, and if they're gone?"
"Hm? Well, if the pony's not there, then how can they be upset about it?" Hitch shrugged at the thought. "But don't copy them without giving credit. That's just rude!" But a crime it was not, he implied without saying. "That answer it all?"
"You've been a great help." He reached to pat Hitch on the head, getting a pleased smile.
At least until Hitch realized he was being pet. "Easy." He brushed David's hand aside gently. "We aren't that close." His smile returned though. "You're not bad at that. Could probably make a living on that if writing doesn't work out."
Massage threrapist for magical ponies? He could think of worse fates one could have... "I'd rather be creating something."
"You and Izzy would get along great." His eyes went up. "That your normal mane style or did you work it into that? If you did it yourself, there's another option. I know a pony that'd snap you right up if you're interested."
Oh no! "This is just as I was made." He ran a few fingers through his curls. "The only shampoo that's touched these recently is water."
"Huh." He inclined his head. "Your mane keeps itself in pretty good shape. I have to do more than that to get it right. Well! Love to chat about tricks and tips, but I should get back to work." He sat up tall and proud, ready to deliver justice. "Have a great day!"
"You too." David slipped out. "I feel silly." Being nervous, about Hitch? Hitch was not a human cop by such a far measure it was dizzying even trying to compare them. "Dumb." David set off on a spirited walk towards home. "Let's find out who I'm reaching out towards." His journey of writing was soon to begin! Or so he hoped.
At least he had a computer to write on, thank all the various divinities responsible for that decision.
David's fingers clacked at the keyboard. His way of writing was not one of other creatives he knew, at least most of them. There was one direction, and that was forward. He had to explain this, and then that. He was getting formatting down for each kind of thing as he went. This was a feat and this was a... Yes, exactly that. No time to second guess. No time to plan.
Who planned anyway? Not him, that's who! He wrote backstory on the alicorns, half of it 'true', and half of it just made up and that was fine. Not like most ponies had any remote clue about them other than Sunny's appearance, and what did they really know about that? Not much, so far as he knew. More typing, more writing. He had a goal in mind, but it wasn't a word count, though he could remember working with that.
Nobody was paying him by the word or expecting an amount of words, so he couldn't work with that. He had to get a product. It didn' t have to be perfect. It didn't need to be amazing! What it needed to be was finished, then he could give it to... Um...
"You stopped." When did Joy get there? "You were typing up a storm a moment ago."
"I just realized I need help after I finish writing this." David frowned with that heavy thought. "Artists to make some great pictures, and someone who can do layout design to bring it all together and make it look great as a package." He tapped his fingers at the table. "There's more to writing a book than just making the words."
Joy inclined her head slowly. "That makes sense... No writer is going to, by themselves, make a game happen." There she was, in a more comfortable and familiar context. "Somepony has to program it, and somepony has to make all the sparkly graphics, and somepony else has to make the sounds and maybe somepony else for the music and..." She shook herself free of that line of thought. "It's a team project. So, you need a team?"
"I think I do..." He started to type, resuming his work. "But I'll tackle that when I get to it. First step, words on the paper. Second, see if it looks right even naked and ugly. If Pipster's friends like it, then I know I have something that might get interest. If not, return to step 1!" And with that, he typed, whistling a little tune as he did so. It occurred to him and he got the computer putting out some music for him.
"No more whistling?" Joy was still there, watching him work.
"It's a trick." He tapped his head between bits of typing. "I have exactly one track of music up here, no more or less. If there's music playing, there's no room for music up here. Also means just putting on some music can defeat even the worst earworms. No room, worm is defeated."
Joypad blinked at that. "Woah, that's like a superpower. Do all humans have it, or is that a David trick?"
"David trick," he assured, working busily. "A little nervous." Not that is seemed to be stopping his words. "Still, it's kind of nice to be back in this. It'd been so long since I wrote anything. I'm making typos I should be ashamed of." Not that it slowed him down, just meant more time hitting backspace or clicking a spot to undo an error, then more typing. He was getting back into the flow of things.
"We're closed."
David blinked at that and looked around. They were alone in the store. He looked to the clock, a few minutes past closing time. He had lost track of everything in his manic rush to produce. He hit save and logged off. "I'll be back to work tomorrow."
Joypad took a step towards the stairs. "It's pretty obvious you're having fun."
"Writing is one of my big things." David shrugged as if confirming that the sky did tend to be blue.
"So... if you want to do that, go ahead." Joy started up the stairs. "I'll call you if it gets hectic, but I managed the store before you got here." She hopped up onto the landing at the top. "I think I can handle it, and I like seeing you be in your happy place."
David joined her upstairs and went to start on dinner for them both. "Helping you with the store is how--"
"--you prove you're earning your keep," finished Joy, cutting him off. "Which you don't have to do. One, we're friends."
"Thanks."
"You're welcome." She smiled with the joy of that being clear. "Two, you're helping the store just being here. Three, you're going to make some money as soon as those lazy jerks give you something to do and you can share a few bits my way, hm? Four! Being your friend--" She gestured grandly between herself and David. "I like seeing you happy. Now, it's not like you want to just sit around doing nothing."
"That sounds boring," agreed David.
"And it'd annoy me, a lot." Joypad grabbed a bottle of salt, attached to her hoof as she shook some of it onto what David was making. "No, you're working, doing your thing. I can appreciate that. Be available, and I have nothing to complain about."
David took the salt back from her and parked it where it had begun. "If you're sure..."
"If it was a videogame," she leaned in closer. "I'd want to be the first to play it. I don't even know how 'imagining' games works, but it's not a videogame." Which sounded like it meant her interest was minimal. "So have fun with it!"
"The real fun happens when I share it." He served them up both a plate, the two sitting at the dining room table. "When I get some feedback, hopefully positive, but even negative and constructive can be great."
"Good attitude." She chomped some of her food, licking her lips. "Keep it. No failure can be a real failure if you learned something from it."
"Exactly." The two nodded in agreement and he got back to eating, soon finishing the meal. "We playing today?"
"We? You mean you watching me playing?" Still, she was going over to her usual spot. "I want to see you play more often." She quirked an ear. "Maybe that's why I like watching you type. You're playing. It's not a game I'd play, but you're playing."
"Playing and working." David danced his fingers. "Depends a bit on attitude. And what you're doing, and why, I suppose, and who for?"
"You're getting off track." Joypad swatted the console, getting it to power up and start loading the game. "So... I didn't forget a thing."
"What thing is that?" He settled back to enjoy the movie-like experience of Joypad playing the game.
"You proposed to me." She glanced sidelong at David. "Me and another mare, just to make it more scandalous. That's hard to forget."
David colored, but it was easy to miss, being dark skinned to start. He had hoped she had just forgotten it. They hadn't talked much about it for a while...
"So I was thinking about it. You know, there's a lot of kinds of relationships out there."
David hiked a brow at that. "Well, we have a few right now. You're my boss, and my friend, and my caretaker in a way."
"Wow." She shook her head slowly. "Put it like that, sounds kinda wrong, but sure, all of those things." She danced a hoof in the air, making the joystick bob with it as she played the game. "But I meant intimate things, and how ponies come together. What I mean is, to get to the point, is that I think I'm alright with moving to the next stage."
David was quiet, perhaps too quiet.
"Hate the idea?" She looked over to see him just sitting there, still. She paused the game and set the pad down. "I can wait."
He meant to respond, but instead, a hiccup of an aborted sniff. "Thanks. Let's take this one step at a time." He extended a finger. "We can start with me being middle aged and you seem like a young adult."
"Guilty as charged." She puffed up her mane with lifts of her hoof. "So? It's not like I'm a foal. Pretty sure you're not taking advantage of me, and I can make decisions. Young adult is still an adult, thanks, grandpa."
"Hey..." He extended a second finger. "Then there's the whole 'we're not even the same species' thing."
She wriggled her nose. "So? Ponies have family that aren't ponies all the time. Sure, usually they're more pets, but have you seen Hitch? That stud has a dragon for a son and a whole crew of animals for best buds! Call them pets and I bet they'd get angry."
David considered that a moment. "I should ask a question. What is the next step?"
"Great question." She clopped her hooves together in a firm meeting. "Close Friends. Best Friends?" She rubbed behind her head awkwardly. "Don't want to admit this... but I don't actually have a lot of other pony pals..."
David frowned at her. "Get out. You're super likeable."
"Stop that." She waved at his compliment. "Glad you think so... but I spend all my time around games, and not with ponies, unless to help them play games. So..." She clucked her tongue on her teeth. "So here I am, without a lot of friends, until this freaky new creature shows up, and he's kinda cool... and we're working out so far."
"Alright..." He reached for the abandoned controller. "So Best Friends. I'd like one of those."
"Me too," she half-sang. "What a coincidence." She hopped to the floor, just to fall to a knee. "David Silver." He tensed. "Will you be my best friend?"
He smiled awkwardly at that. "Are there steps after that? You can't have a first if there isn't a second," he reasoned.
She inclined her head. "Clever... There are, but that's a multiple choice kinda thing." She shrugged at that. "Let's get to that if we get to that. Right now, BFFs!" She offered a hoof towards him.
He took it, cradling the hoof in his hand. Ponies around there had a heart for a frog, big and obvious, instead of the implied one that a horse would have. He trailed the heart gently with a finger.
She went a vivid red, squeaking. "H-hey..." But she didn't yank her hoof away, and so he continued, gently exploring that hoof in his hands. "You have a hoof thing?" She wriggled faintly in his grip. "That's kind of strange." Still, she wasn't moving, letting him continue. "Never met somepony with a hoof thing before..."
"Still haven't. Not a pony." He pet and rubbed over her fetlock with one hand, the one that helped hold her leg up, the other working at her hoof. "I have a lot less hooves than you, so give me a turn. Only fair."
She stuck her tongue out at that. "Well, then I don't want to hear any complaining when I check out your hands." She hopped up onto the couch, but kept the hoof in reach of him. "You know, I can't play while you're doing that, so you're going to have to pick which we're doing." Not that it sounded like she minded either option.
"I had hooves for a little while," mused David. "On some level, almost miss them. Don't need them up here though." He tickled with his fingers gently. "I like my fingers way too much."
"I'm not minding them," she sighed out, relaxing under the low intensity hoof massage. "You could do this, you know, if the writing doesn't work out."
"You're the second pony to bring that up today." He gently set her hoof back on the couch.
"Proof neither of us is fibbing. Who was the other one?" She picked up the joypad and got back to the game, chatting with her Best Friend. Their relationship had changed.
David looked across the table at the others that occupied it, flanking it from all sides. They were... They were amazing pony stereotypes of nerds. Two wore thick glasses. One had a pocket protector on her vest in case you weren't sure about it. Nerds. All of them.
Good thing he was also one of those, just not as obvious in some ways? Stealth nerd! "Thank you all for coming."
That mare rolled a hoof in the air. "Hey. So we hear you just got into the game... but also decided to write for it. That's bold."
"Or stupid," added a guy. "Can't wait to see which it is."
"Or both," added another guy. "Could be both."
David pushed forward one of several stacks of papers. "Here it is. I kept it mostly to the actual rules." He tapped at another stack. "If you love lore--"
He didn't get to finish. The mare slapped down a hoof on the lore stack and pulled it right over. "I love lore." As if that wasn't already obvious. "Gives the numbers a reason to exist."
"Please." One of the guys adjusted his glasses. "We're not reciting the lore as we play."
"Says you." She flipped open to the first page. "Ooo, alicorns of Equestria, huh?"
That got the others' attention. "I told you that would come out," continued the mare. "Eventually. They had to! There's an alicorn, right there." She waved a hoof in the direction of the brighthouse. "But is it OP?"
"Probably super OP," lamented one of the guys.
David pushed out more of the stacks, the ones with the rules. "Have a look and you tell me. You've all been playing this. And if it is, tell me that too, and be specific." He waggled a pen. "I'm not fragile, adjustments can be made. This is just a random printout, not a published book, yet."
Thoughts of how one published books in that equine world tickled at him, but that was a future problem.
The mare leaned forward with a little smile. "So, you're at Joypad's place, right? With the video games?"
"Joypad, right. She's great." David settled back, his stacks given out. "But it was Pip that pointed me to you."
One of the stallions laughed. "Poor kid, named the same thing as a pop star. He must hate her."
The other swatted at him. "Have you met him? He's pretty peppy to 'hate' anypony."
The mare rolled her eyes and flipped onwards. "You made this up?" She tapped at the papers. "Feels... right. You copied the tone." She angled her head to a bookshelf with the books of the original game.
"A talent." He shrugged softly. "I read and I put myself in the world and wrote from there. Glad to hear it reads right."
"Yeah..." She flipped onwards. "Like it... So, did you make it all up or what?"
"Duh," taunted the first stallion. "Not like anypony knows much about alicorns, even the alicorn."
She shrugged. "What's up with that?" She clicked her tongue on her teeth. "She is one. You'd think that'd come with some bit of knowing."
"Sunny?" David glanced about the table. "Seems nice enough. But how does it look?"
"Right." The quieter male tapped at his set of papers. "You have the mechanical terms about right." He adjusted his glasses. "Kudos for that. But it all feels... Like you're trying but you haven't played it."
The mare grinned viciously. "Sounds like we have a new player."
Wait. That hadn't been...
"Welcome aboard." The louder male pushed his stack forward. "Guess we know what you'll be playing."
David didn't see a way around that... "If you're sure?" All three nodded quickly. "Alright." He dug out that set of dice he had gotten and set it on the table. "Guess I get to use these."
The mare snatched the bag and spilled the dice out of it without delay. "Nice." She leaned in, considering the colors. "Thoughtful, huh? Figures."
The quieter male turned up his nose. "Even! That's just an old mare's tale. You can't tell anything about a pony from their dice colors."
Even sat back with a smile. "Well, am I wrong?"
"Thinking is one thing I do? Creation and spontaneity I'd rate higher?"
"Perfect." Even slammed the table, making the dice dance in front of her slapping hoof. "Got it right on the money with the inside and outside colors. I have you figured out, human. Watch out."
The louder male laughed with humor. "She means it. So, uh, hey." He offered a hoof towards David. "I'm the dreamweaver." That was the local term for a game master. "Against Odds, but Against is fine."
"David." Not that they needed to hear his name again. He bumped the offered hoof with a balled hand. He offered the same fist towards the quieter male.
The stallion touched his hoof to the hand, coloring faintly. "Um, hi... Gerome." Hm, ponies of that generation sometimes just had... names, instead of words. "Nice to meet you. Um..." He looked to the others. "Are we playing?"
The mare shrugged. "Pip pointed us at him." She pointed at David. "To look at his stuff, and we got a player out of it, but I doubt he has an avatar ready to go."
Avatar, what the locals called a 'character'. So many subtle differences in terms but with the same meaning. All of them looked to David for confirmation.
"Got me." He held up both hands wardingly. "I thought I was just showing off rules, not playing."
"At least you brought dice." Even scooped them into the bag. "Even Odds, by the way. Do I get one?" She thrust out a hoof and his bag at once.
He accepted the bag and touched fist to hoof. "So what's the schedule? I'll add it." He dug out his phone to do that.
It was a weekly game, and added to his schedule. "Take a look over what I have." He waved at the stacks he was leaving behind. "Any and all feedback, super welcome." With a little sound effect, he made for the door, the meeting seeming to be over.
But the camera didn't follow him. Even Odds tapped the lore stack. "Creative."
Against tapped a rules stack. "New. And not perceptive."
Even perked at that. "How did you get that?"
Against shrugged. "We have the same last name. Most ponies note that." He looked at Gerome. "What do you think?"
"Distinguished," sighed out Gerome, sagging in place with sparkles in his eyes.
Even peered at him curiously. "What?"
"Um!" Gerome quickly regathered himself. "I mean, seems nice..."
Against laughed and swatted the other stallion. "You don't even know if he likes that kind of thing. And you just met him! And he's not even a pony."
Gerome worked his hooves miserably, caught... "He seems nice," he weakly repeatedly.
Even clucked her tongue. "Well! I could tell you more about what I could see, but that'd just be more superstitions. Who needs those?"
Gerome colored a bit. "What'd you see?"
Even leaned in with a growing smile. "Admit there's something to it first."
Gerome threw up his hooves, flopping bonelessly. "Fine! Just tell me, please..."
"Alright then... He's dressed like somepony else picked things for him." Even brought her hooves together. "Or he just took whatever worked off the racks. Fashion, not his thing. He probably doesn't put a lot of thought into how he looks. His beard and mane echo this. Has he even heard of shampoo? Good smile, probably nice, like you said. Pragmatic, eyes on the prize." She ran her hoof over the lore stack. "Which is why he was thinking about these pretty much entirely. The game was a bonus prize at best. Ten bits he gets home and freaks out when he realizes what he signed up for."
Against snickered softly. "Sis, you are the opposite. You see everything. You just don't always share it."
She blew a raspberry at her brother. "And... he barely noticed you. He saw you were a fellow nerd, and I think he liked that, but nothing past that."
"He liked that?" Gerome picked the part he wanted to hear. "Really?"
Even clopped a hoof to her face. "Way to miss the point. He didn't see you as a stallion. Just a nerd. Nothing wrong with being one of those." She pointed to each pony there, including herself. "But he didn't look at me like a mare, or you like a stallion. But also he's not a pony! Maybe humans don't... Maybe ponies are ugly to humans? I dunno! I'm not a human. Ask him."
Against shrugged at all the romantic chat being shared. "Or, maybe, stick with me here, he just didn't come here looking for a new pickup!" He waved at the closest rule stack. "Maybe! He just wanted to share what he wrote with some ponies that play the game, and are now gossiping about him. Or maybe he thinks you're hot." He leered at the burning Gerome. "Maybe he's thinking about you right now."
Even tossed a die, bouncing off Against's head. "Stop teasing him! What do you see in him anyway? I mean... they're... all spindly." She wobbled her arms in a bad intimation of human arms. "And their fur is all bunched in in places instead of spread out." She ran a hoof over her fuzzy face. "Kinda wierd..."
Against shrugged. "Well..." His eyes turned towards Gerome. "They're both greymanes."
"True," admitted Even, an adult, not middle aged or beyond. "But, colt! You need more than that!" She smiled even as he deflated. "Which is why you should get to know him, as a person. I'd say pony, but he isn't that, so..."
"So..." Gerome pushed his glasses back. "I should say hi, um, outside the game. See what he likes..." He began tapping his hooves together with obvious worry. "Maybe we like the same music?"
Against snorted softly. "Only you listen to that."
Even waved him off. "Don't listen to him. Just ask and see. Don't get overly excited, just a pony you want to know about, even if they don't have hooves." She gazed at her hooves with a fresh horror. "Imagine not having hooves..."
"David!" An image was on his phone, smiling at him brightly. "Been too long."
It was his contact. "Got a spot you need me for?"
"More than that." His face got real big as he leaned all the way in. "A whole media blitz. A commercial run, and you're the star. Check your email. I need you to do those as quickly as possible."
David pulled up the email with a few presses. "Alright... do that... sure..." Most of them were pretty simple. Him playing a game, looking happy. Him smiling at the camere. Him saying specific things. "Sure sure..." But then... "I don't... How do I do that?"
"Do what, babykins?" asked the grinning media manager.
"This." David tapped at the screen, not helping. "Looks like it needs all kinds of backdrops, or at least a green screen to edit it out in post."
"You don't have one of those?" He sounded legit astounded at the idea. "Hey, look, you're working for us! So long as it helps get this done, just buy it, and send us an invoice afterwards. Don't go nuts and it shouldn't be a problem."
Invoice, he knew what those were. "Alright.. Can I get a forward though? I don't want to lean on Joypad to cover these things. Once I get my first payday, shouldn't be that big of a deal."
"Exotic and prudent. Love it! Absolutely love it. Hey, check that phone, should have a payment app."
It did. David gave his identifier on it, and a little chime alerted him almost instantly that money had arrived. "Woah, um, on the case."
"I knew I could count on you." The line went dead.
David was left with more money in his personal control than he had held in the pony land. "Let's be responsible..."
"Can't believe it." Joypad was walking along with David. "Your first payday! Woo!"
"Sorta." He wobbled a hand left and right. "An advance, to pay for stuff I need to get the job done. It's not my money."
Joypad raised a brow. "Wow."
"What?" He put a balled hand on a hip. "It isn't until I actually get paid."
Joypad waved a hoof over David. "Look at you, mister responsible. 'It's not my money!'" She snickered softly. "Somepony shoves that many bits my way, some of it might become mine pretty quickly, just saying..."
David swatted at her, but she dodged easily, laughing all the more. "I want to keep this job. It'll pay for my other project."
"Other... Oh! Your writing?" She came in closer at his side. "Clever. So being a star is just a stepping stone to getting a book published."
"Basically." David shrugged and ducked around an incoming pony. "I have no real buy in there. Being a face? Not really my thing. But! I can put that money towards what I do care about."
"Which is writing." She nodded, seeming to grasp it with a little mmhmm. "Alright! So, what are we buying with not your money?"
David drew his phone free and pulled up that list, showing it towards Joypad. "This."
"Look at that." She leaned in with a squint. "Alright, first stop." And so began a whirlwind tour of a few photography stores to get the supplies. Sure, some of them were initially hesitant. They sold expensive things, and there was Joypad, who wasn't rich, and David, the... whatever he was... Still, when he touched his phone to their terminal, payment happened, and all was good.
But they had the goods. Back at the store, Joypad led David upstairs, but to a room up there they hadn't gone into before. "This is yours." She threw open a door into an almost empty room, small, dusty smelling, and apparently David's. "Film here, sleep here, don't care. They told me it was storage, and now it's storing my human. Nifty, right?"
David wandered the small space, humming softly. "This'll work... It's perfect. Thank you." He reached for her head and she didn't stop him from gently petting her. "You're the best."
"Aw, you're welcome. I want to see what stupid commercials they make out of you, so get to it." She walked back towards the stairs. "Have fun!"
So it became a day of filming. He set up the backdrops, a green screen made to edit things later by ponies who knew how to do that, which wasn't him. He had a list of shots, so he did the things, many several times. He wasn't sure which was good or not, so a few each and let them pick out the best afterwards? That felt safer.
The hardest part? Remembering the lines when there were lines. Memory of that sort, not his specialty, but he did it over and over until a few good takes came out.
He sank into his chair with a relieved grunt. "Last.. one."
"You can save it for tomorrow." When did Joy get there, standing in the doorway? "You spent all day! You deserve a break, and dinner."
David checked his phone for the time, a sharp whistle following it. "Wow..."
"Yeah huh." Joypad circled around him to push him out of the room. "Tomorrow! That's still on time, right?"
"Should be..." He went right into the kitchen and got to cooking without prompting. "How'd the store go?"
"Everypony had a good time." She hopped up onto a chair, watching David prepare the food. "A solid day. We playing today?"
"Uh, sure." Things grew quiet as the meal making continued. "Oh! I forgot to say, gonna be joining a weekly game."
Joy's eyes glimmered. "What kinda game? Can I join?"
"Well..." He set out the plates of food. "They probably wouldn't say no, but it's an imagining game, not a video one." He tapped his head. "The pictures are up here."
She blinked softly at him. "There are no pictures up here." She tapped at her head. "Do you go to sleep and dream as part of the game?"
David sank into his seat at the dining table. "Imagination? Seeing things with your thoughts?"
"Nope..." Joy shook her head slowly. "Only when I'm asleep, like a normal pony. Do humans see them when they're awake? Woah!"
David was quiet as he ate, considering it a moment. "I will have to ask another pony."
"Ask them what?" She chomped eagerly at the fried bit. "Mmm."
"If they can dream while awake, or not." He considered Joy. "I can."
"Human super powers!" She declared with a properly awed tone. "What's that like? Do you slip from place to place like a dream? How do you actually think about anything?"
David chuckled softly, if a bit nervously. "It's not hard, just the way I was always wired. When I think about what you said, I can hear your voice, saying it."
"What?! No way." She stuck out her tongue at that. "You can make me say whatever, or just what you heard me say?"
David thought of Joypad, imagining her standing in a field of nothing, casually talking, "I can say whatever you decide I say, but you better not make me say something stupid."
"You better not make me say anything stupid," echoed the actual Joypad, making David jump. "What?"
"Nothing... But, really, alright. Just a different way of seeing the world." He sank his fork in the food. "Just different, not better or worse."
"Better for some things, worse for others," she sing-songed. "You--" She tapped at him with a heart-ended hoof. "--are a creative that likes writing fantastical things. Being able to dream whenever? Probably super helpful for that. I can only do that when I'm asleep. I'd have to keep a notebook next to me and try to write it down real fast if I wanted to be inspired by it. So, nope! Gonna stick in the real world. You enjoy fantasy land."
And that was that? "Alright. Food good?"
"As usual." She grabbed her plate and reached for David's, ferrying both away to the sink. "We can play after I finish this. When's your game?"
"You're alright with it then?" He watched her clean, not really room for two people, nor enough of a task.
"Why wouldn't I be? It's nice you're making a new friend or two, and getting out there." She snorted softly. "Maybe a little jealous, except it's not a video game. I can't dream while awake, remember?" She pointed off to her console. "I let that do it for me."
David patted the back of her shoulder. "You're welcome to join, if you want."
"Nah." She pushed away from the sink, emptied of dirty dishes. "Message me when it's at so I know. Game time!"
It was game time. David sank next to her on the couch, and that story continued.
"Ooo." The voice came through his phone. "Aaaa." The media manager was going through the videos, jumping from point to point. "It'll need some touch up... but that's why you used the background... Loving it.. Loving... it..." He slapped down his hoof. "Did you invoice already?"
"For the parts I got, yeah." David would have held up his phone, but that was what he was talking to. "Emailed."
"Fantastic. Not my problem, but the ponies who do the bits will handle that." Like that, brushed off his plate. "But you did good! It'll take a bit for us to take this unformed clay and make it media miracles! But, not your problem." A chime sounded, money arriving. "Payday. Send back the remainder of what I forwarded that wasn't used for the supplies."
Well, shoot. Good thing, he decided, he didn't use it for anything but that. Though he could have made the difference with his actual pay. Simpler. "You got it. Tell me how it goes."
"Trust me, you'll be at least... the fifth to know!" He reached for the screen, hoof getting huge a moment before the call ended.
Success! David had money in the bank. Actually... He went ahead and returned the remainder of that forwarded amount. No reason to make that complicated, or delay. There, all the money in his hands was actually his.
And he had to be careful with it. That money had to finish the book...
But first!
He found Joypad signing up a new pony for a gaming card. Waiting his turn, he approached her.
She could see his joy perhaps. "Huh, look who's all smiles today. What happened?"
David flipped his phone around so she could see the number. "Got paid."
Joypad clapped in applause. "Great! Hey, everypony. David just did his first human marketing. Expect advertising sometime... soonish?" David shrugged. "Soonish!"
The room erupted into cheers, clearly looking forward to seeing what commercial David would appear in.
David tucked the phone away. "But first, I want to even up."
"Even up?" Joy raised a brow. "With what?"
It had just gone away, and lo it returned, his phone. "I want to pay for the food and... room and board! You've been super awesome, no doubt, but we're both adults. We should try to cover our share when we can."
Joy raised a hoof. "No! I don't want money in this... We have a good thing."
"A great thing." He pressed the phone against her blocking hoof. "And I want to keep it that way, which means cutting off things to be regretting at the root. I want to pay my share. This house--" He waved a finger around the store. "We share it. I care about it working. I should care about it working."
Joy grunted. "But--"
And then the cheering. The store had caught wind of their conversation and were applauding and stomping their approval.
Joy went a bright red. "Hey! This isn't about you all!" She tried to shoo them off, with limited success.
A mare giggled softly. "I wish my roomie was so thoughtful. I have to chase them down to do their part."
A stallion nudged against David. "She's offering a free place, why not take it?"
"I couldn't." He gently brushed the stallion away.
"Back to your games!" Joy pointed sternly, and the crowd dispersed under her withering glare. "Now... Fine... You have your heart set on it... Pick... I dunno... Pick a bill. That'll be your bill. I'll put it in your name and you can pay it."
"And you won't see it." Avoiding him having to ever hand her a single bit. "Alright, if you prefer..." He considered the price of various things in the store. "What about the AC and Heating?"
She shook her head. "That's part of the power. I don't get separate bills for them."
Well... "Then the power?"
"That's a big--" He showed the number. "Alright... You don't even know how often you'll get that... If it becomes too much, just tell me. No bad feelings."
"No bad feelings." He fired a thumbs up, a funny human gesture she had learned the positive meaning of. "Nothing but honesty when it comes to this kind of thing."
They met, balled fist to hoof. A deal was struck. "I'll get it in your name and you'll get the letters about it. It'll be good practice to learn how to deal with that."
"I agree." There was no doubt there, perhaps even excitement.
She angled her head at him. "You're pretty alright with this."
"I like adulting." He tucked the phone away. "Let's be responsible adults, together."
"Responsible adults... You're ruining my punky reputation." She stuck out her tongue at him in defiance. "Alright, back to running a store." She rolled her eyes. "Like a responsible adult." Grumbling, she returned to behind the counter and had her smile on by the time the next customer came up, ready to refill their game card.
David emerged from the store to collide his swinging right hand into the soft warm snout of a pony. He squeaked and danced away. "Sorry!" Did he just swat some random pony? "Sorry, didn't mean that."
There was a pony with glasses, smiling nervously, his cheeks darkened. "It's alright." Oh, um, that pony he had met... at the game. He had a name. It was a super nice name... Completely great... Pity he couldn't remember it... "Um, are you working?" He pointed past David to the store he was emerging from.
"I finished my work, at least here." David closed the door more carefully than he had emerged from it. "You're from the game, right?"
"Yep!" He seemed to brighten, taking that as a sign of being recognized. "I wanted to talk about that... if that's alright?"
David scootched further to the side, so other ponies could come and go without them in the way. "Sure!" He fired a finger gun at Gerome, whose name he still didn't remember, with a pchew sound to go with it. "What's up? Oh! I have a question."
"You do?" Gerome inclined his head, one ear going up. "If I can help."
David tapped at his head. "Up here. When you imagine an apple, do you see an apple? Can you weigh the imagined apple? Can you taste the imagined apple? Or are you just thinking of the concept of 'apple' and none of that sensory stuff?"
Gerome made gestures as if he were holding an imaginary apple, but swiftly slapped his hooves down. "I can do the... Do you?"
That was not a finished thought... "I can do all the senses on an imagined apple. I just took a bite out of it, because I can. I can feel the moisture of that chomp, and down it goes, yum."
Gerome licked over his lips with sympathetic approval of the apple chomp. "I... Don't think this is strange. I mean! Please don't think this is strange..." He held up a hoof towards David. "But I put an apple right here."
David examined that hoof. It had a heart on it, as the ponies of that world tended to have. It did not have an apple on it. "I don't... see it?"
"Nopony can, but me." He brought his hoof closer and sniffed at the hoof? Or was it the apple he could see? "I can do all of what you just did with the apple I put there." He took a chomp of... nothing... He chewed at the nothing and even swallowed the nothing. "Mmm, a little sour."
"Wow." David patted Gerome without thinking of it. "Wow. You have Pro and Hyperphantasia. There I was, thinking I was special with just one of them."
Gerome clapped giddily, perhaps enjoying the petting more than required. "I can make you a pony." And lo it was, at least in his vision. "You'd make a nice earth pony... Your fur would be the same color your skin was... Um, your cutie mark." He leaned off to the side, as if looking at an actual pony, not an imagined one. "A set of papers, like the bundles you walked in with."
Not the image David had given his ponysona before, but... "Not bad. But I'm a human." He hiked both thumbs at himself, a human trick. "Sorry."
"N-no!"
That had come out loud. David shrugged softly. "No what?"
"No... you're fine the way you are. Um..." Gerome played with his hooves nervously. "So! Um... Movies!"
"Sorry, but I don't know any of them." He hadn't been a big movie watcher in human land. Pony movies, entirely outside his general attention. "I'm sure a lot of them would be neat."
"Actually..." Gerome inclined his head the same way David had. "I don't watch them either... Music!"
David laughed suddenly. "Wow, you are just firing topics, aren't you?"
"Sorry..." Gerome sat up with an awkward smile. "I'm not good at this. Making friends is, um, hard..."
David relaxed at the admission. "Oh, well, if you want to make a friend, let's do something you like doing. Hopefully, I like it too, and, pow, that's one way we're friends right away."
"W-what if you don't like it?" Gerome shrank at the horror of that scenario. "What then?"
"Then you get to show it to me anyway. Maybe I'll be alright with it." He hiked a thumb at the computer cafe they were in front of. "A little kid, a foal, Pipster. He showed me how to have some fun with driving games. Still pretty bad at it, but it was fun. We're friends about it now."
"That sounds nice." He licked his lips. "Alright! About the game. Did you make your persona yet?"
"I was going to the day before," admitted Dave with a dramatic shrug. "I can usually belt out characters quickly, at least in the systems I knew well. It'd help if I had a computer tool, but I don't know any for this game."
"Oh!" Gerome hopped to his hooves. "There are some good ones. I can show you. I wanted to help you make the character. Um, you'll have to finesse it a bit, since you're making alicorns, and none of them will have those rules."
"If they did, I already messed up." David reached for the door, his plans to escape into the world ending. "Let's head inside, if you want to show me."
"I do!" And he darted inside, waving for David to follow. "Um, wait... I thought you never played this?"
"I haven't." He closed the door, back inside with the noises of the café reaching him in videogaming pleasure. "But I have played other things like it, um... in another country."
"Another country," breathlessly gasped out Gerome. "Wow! Oh, well, you aren't a pony... You wouldn't be from here... That makes sense. Sorry, being silly."
David gently ruffled Gerome's mane. "Not a problem. Oh, if you're an introvert and things get too loud or you just get tired, feel free to say so. No offense will be taken, not a scrap."
Gerome hurried to a terminal and got to typing with eager hoof taps. "Who's that?" And there was Joypad, noticing. "They have a card, so they've been here before..."
"Another player, at the imagining game." David paused his march to talk to Joypad. "Seems to want to go over how to make a character."
"Neat." She inclined her head at him. "Just... be careful."
"Of?"
"He could just be interested because 'look at the strange new thing.'" She shrugged with an eh. "Don't freak out, but don't assume nothing either."
"He's still a pony," reasoned David. "If I treat him fair, I'll be treated fair, roughly 80% odds."
"That's still a 20% chance it goes off."
David tapped Joy on her snout. "A risk I will take." He went to join Gerome. "Found what you're looking for?"
"Right here." Gerome shoved to the side, forcing his chair to slide out of the way and reveal the page he had arrived at. "I love this site, lets you make a persona nice and fast."
David leaned in for a better look. Ah. "Sure." It looked like one of a dozen such sites he'd seen back on his own world for making characters in one of over a dozen systems. "Perfect. Can I print what I make?"
"Better!" He directed a hoof near the top. "Just log in, then you can get it from other computers or phones."
"Sweet." David pulled up another chair to crash in, clicking and tapping. "So if I pick... and then..."
"Don't forget." He put a hoof on David's hand, guiding him towards another part of the sheet. "Gotta do this before."
"Oh, thanks. You can just point." He didn't seem directly irritated at the brief contact, but was also setting a line. And back to tapping did David return. "And... this is the part it doesn't know."
"No..." Gerome leaned back on his own chair. "But you can do the rest and adjust it. I'll show you how when you're done."
"Thanks." David quickly worked out the rest of his... "Hm?" Gerome was leaning against him, eyes on the screen. "You alright?"
"You sure you want to take that perk?" He pointed at the screen. "Refined Approach seems more appropriate."
David tensed faintly. Something was up, but what? "You're going to fall out of that chair." Being a wheeled chair, propping against someone also in a wheeled chair? Maybe not safe. Also, an excuse to gently push Gerome back and have him sit upright. "Let me ask straight up, why the interest? You don't give a personal tutorial to every new player, do you?"
"N-no..." He looked away, ears folded. "No... Not usually..." Gerome looked back to David with a nervous smile. "Making friends is complicated. Um... I don't want to upset anypony."
"I'm not a pony," noted David, one finger raised. "Can't upset a pony around me."
"Ha..." But he wasn't laughing, just looking more nervous.
David searched for possible answers. Was it? "I don't like upsetting anypony, or anything else either."
"You don't?" Gerome inclined his head, snorting in an equine way. "What do you do about it?"
"I'm too old to tiptoe around it." David shrugged. "Hey, Gerome."
"Yeah?"
"Do you like humans?" David asked, lilting a bit at the end.
"Not any human." Gerome pointed at David. "But at least one." And then he realized what he just said, and went a dark red. "Oh... Sorry... Sorry... I can go now."
David put out an arm, blocking the escape path. "Calm down. Um... As a friend? We're just meeting."
"As a friend, I... hope?" He sat back up. Working his forehooves together. "Maybe more? If it works out."
Did ponies come in that flavor? "Are you gay?"
"I'm not feeling super happy right now..." Gerome pushed away from the desk, wheels of the chair squeaking. "Sorry."
Wrong meaning... "Do you like other males?"
If blushes could kill... He looked almost lightheaded from it, heart storming in his long ears. "Only special ones..."
"Do you like females?" prodded David, clearly digging for certainty with the shy stallion.
"They're fine! Very fine... But, um, um..." He hopped suddenly to the ground, the chair spinning away from him. "Um!"
"Calm down." David gestured in patting motions without touching. "If you're attracted... that's actually very flattering."
"Good. Good good." Gerome nodded, some semblance of certainty returning to him. "Good. I feel like a foal. I'm not a foal." He curled a hoof to point at himself. "We're both greymanes." His mane wasn't as grey as David's. "We should act like it."
"Soak up that feeling." David tapped himself on the chest. "You're a greymane, not a foal. You're too old for this. Say what you mean, and leave it to other pe--ponies to deal with it."
"Too old... I want to hug you." He reached out a hoof. "I want to cuddle and talk about gaming stuff. I want to... do everything... How's that sound?"
"Like a greymane finding the power of the grey in their mane." David reached, ruffling Gerome's not grey mane. "But, since you were so clear, you deserve an equally clear answer." Gerome tensed, his ears going back. David gently tickled one of those ears, encouraging them upwards. "Don't be nervous. You want the truth, not for me to say whatever I think you want to hear, right?"
"Y-yes, please. Oh..." Gerome shrank back.
Which made room for Joypad to come storming in around David, towards him. "You're too trusting," she hissed back at David, facing Gerome. "You think you can just come in here and whisper sweet nothings in his ear and I'll let you get away with it? Stop taking advantage of my human! He may be nice, but he has a fierce defender!"
Most of the shop was watching the drama that had become more interesting than the gaming they had been doing.
"I'm not unreasonable." Joy was eyeing him like a lioness that spotted an easy meal. "If you're a legit pony."
Gerome inclined his head. "What's a not legit pony?"
Joy clopped a hoof to her face. "I mean a pony who is legit. If you're not a phony pony full of baloney."
A mare whistled supportively. "Are you going to crush him in a game?"
"Tempting... But not appropriate." Joy lowered her hooves. "We're not testing if you're serious about..." It was only then she realized she had an audience. "Stop staring!" She shooed at them to go back to their games. "Anyway... Not testing if you're serious about a game. We're talking about him." She leveled a hoof at David. "You don't even know anything about him."
"Um..." Gerome tapped his hooves softly, fidgeting in place. "He likes writing. He likes playing imagining games." He curled a hoof at his head. "He can see things up here."
Joy colored swiftly. "W-what? How do you know that last part?!"
"He told me and I listened." Gerome nodded confidently. "What do you know, um, ma'am?"
Joy wrinkled her nose, considering what to disclose. "I know what he likes to eat. I know how he acts when something goes wrong, or goes right. I know how he likes to play his games and what kinds he likes. I knew about the picture thing." She tapped at her head. "Even if that's super strange."
"I can do that," argued Posey with a shrug.
"Me too," chimed a stallion, causing a chain reaction as ponies compared their various mental visualization abilities. It seemed most could see images in their mind.
Joy listed with deflation. "W-what?" Having it rubbed in her snout that her condition wasn't normal... "But..." Ponies kept volunteering their abilities, ranging wildly from basic images to the full dream experiences David had described. But most of them could see something. "But..." She took an unsure step back, her sense of self cracking as a disability made itself clear. "I don't see anything," she barely muttered.
A door slapped open. A unicorn came striding in, a manic look in her eyes, and a beret bobbing on her head with her hurried steps. "There you are!" The mare went straight for David and Joy. "Both of you."
Joy wheeled on the new presence. "Wha? Onyx!" She smiled at the familiar face. "Hey. Welcome back."
Onyx returned the smile, but hers was full of nervous energy. "Hey. Why is everypony staring at us?"
Posey raised a hoof. "We were just talking about the things we can see, up here." She tapped at her own head.
Onyx nodded. "Oh, neat..."
"I can't see anything," whispered out Joy. "I'm broken..."
David set a hand on Joy's back. "You're not broken. It's okay. Also, weren't you..." Names were not his strong point... but Onyx felt wrong... "Gloo--Gloomy!"
Onyx started at that. "What? Oh... Old nickname..." She laughed nervously. "Not important. I need to talk to you... Am I interrupting?" She noticed Gerome looking at them so intently. "Sorry?"
Gerome cleared his throat. "Hello, young lady."
Onyx cocked a brow. "I don't think I'm that younger than you. So... what was happening before I rushed in?"
Joy turned to the computer. "Enough. I have a store to run. You, play games." She pointed at Gerome. "You, make yourself busy, not next to him." She pointed to David, and then at Onyx. "Games!" She dug out three cards. "Unlimited for the day for the lot of you. Go go go!"
Sending them scurrying away, Joy huffed as she returned to the front desk to help ponies going about their business.
David noticed something sitting next to him. Onyx floating the chair up as she hopped into it to have a seat. "Hey." He waved a few fingers, other hand logging into the machine, an act that got faster when his other hand joined the effort. "You alright?"
"No, but also yes?" She rested her hooves on the desk, but wasn't playing with the computer. "Everything before today is... fuzzy... I feel like I just got away from something... I'm super happy to see you and Joy." She smiled gently at that. "Hope that goes both ways?"
David huhed at the curious explanation. "Sounds rough. Happy to see you though." He offered a hand, and got a hoof slapped against it. Good enough. "Things have calmed down, mostly..."
"Did they? Tell me about it. I feel like I could do with somepony else's adventures for a change right now." She sank, head between her hooves. "Even if I can't remember mine right now..."
"Well... To start, we settled the mare romance question."
Onyx sat up sharply. "You did? Um... so which did you go with?" She glanced away and back. "You didn't go for both of them, did you?"
David laughed at the idea. "I was being extra stupid. I can barely keep up with Joy, and I wanted to throw another on top? What was I thinking? No. Besides, the other wandered off back to her thing." She had a name... it was a good name... "So just us by default, and we settled on being Best Friends, and, know what? I'm pretty alright with that."
Onyx melted with a smile. "Aw, that's kinda sweet... Congratulations to both of you." She reached up to adjust her berret. "I need to get one of those..."
"I don't think there's much stopping you." He shrugged, inclining his head towards Gerome. "Like I told him, do what you like doing, where other ponies can see. The ones that like it will come on over and say hey if you let them."
"That... is such painfully obvious advice." Onyx clopped a hoof to her face. "But still true... Alright. Alright! I'll do that. It's time to get my life back in order!"
David patted her on the back. "Sounds great. You're not rhyming so much."
"Did I?" She thought back on past experiences. "Wow... Maybe that adventure beat it out of me? I still feel a wicked rhyme or two, waiting to come out. There'll be more." She winked. "Have no doubt."
David fired a finger gun at her. "There's the stuff. Well, you're welcome to stop by whenever you're in town. Pretty sure we're both happy to have you around whenever."
"Whenever," Joy echoed, plunking down a can of Soda in front of Onyx and a bottle of water in front of David. "Things nice and calm over here?"
Onyx picked up her soda, stuck to her hoof as she willed the tab free with a hiss of carbonation. "I am feeling way better now... It's good to be around friends... not adventuring..."
"Adventuring got old." Joy looped back around towards the front. "Here's to just living."
David popped open his bottle, screwing it off to get a sip. "Pony water is... so dang clean." And refreshing!
Onyx raised a brow at him. "Was your old water... dirty? Harsh."
"Not that dirty!" He could imagine the muddy water Onyx was thinking of. "But there's a difference. This is like... almost distilled, but just enough to make it not taste like literally nothing. It's pretty great." He put down the bottle and pulled up the page he had been on, resuming his work on the persona. "You play imagining games?"
Onyx shook her head. "Imagi... Oh, those! Nope. All those funny dice are kinda fun. Always wanted to try rolling a few."
Well, since it was asked. David dug out his bag of dice and spilled them out.
Onyx beamed, grabbing up all of them at once and letting them fly. "oOoo... Rolled a 3... a 5... a 12... and a 7?" She angled her head at each die, calling out the numbers as she came on them. "Is that good?"
"You won the game," he cheered, some faux-electronic noises of victory fanfare to go with it. "How did you do that so fast?"
She swatted at him. "You're teasing, silly." She hopped to the floor. "Alright, I feel... less frazzled." She lifted the soda for a chug. "I'll be off, oh! You have a phone, right?" She dug hers out. "Let's swap."
They touched phones together with a happy chime from either, announcing the contacts were shared in the contact.
Joy swung back over. "She's done?" She had seen Onyx wandering away, looking fairly happy about things. "Figured she'd want to talk."
"She did, but what I said was good enough, apparently." David swung his phone around. "I got her number."
"Sweet." Joy quickly took down the details into her own phone. "So she's not ghosting on us, alright. Now..." She looked over towards Gerome, who was busy not looking at them. "We need to talk, after the store's all closed up. I'm not done about that." She went off, smile returned as she put her customer service face back into place.
David busied himself with trying to get his character, er, persona in order. But he spotted movement. Gerome was trying to escape. He pushed up without a word, intercepting the pony at the door. "Where are you going?"
Gerome squeaked, realizing he'd been caught. "Your friend seems mad. I figured... I shouldn't upset her."
"She's more scared than mad." He tapped Gerome at the top of his snout. "So be patient and we'll talk after the store closes."
"Oh... you want to?" He stepped awkwardly in place. "Alright... Um, I'm a little thirsty."
David thrust his opened but still fairly full bottle at Gerome. "Drink."
Gerome accepted it with a hoof, sticking to it. "Thanks." He started towards his computer. "See you... afterwards, alright?"
"Alright." David finished his circuit back to his seat.
"Hey." Which brought him past Joy, who noticed his movement. "He giving you any trouble?"
"No way. He was ready to run away. You scared him good." He grabbed another bottle of water but scanned it himself and paid for it with his phone without Joy's help.
"Hey! I woulda just given that to you..." She pouted a little. "Still... alright. I was trying to be scary, so sure. I won't bite his head off or anything, unless he hurts you... Then skulls are back on the menu!"
A few giggles sounded from nearby. Some ponies had heard her. "I'm just joking!"
Gerome settled back in his seat, holding the bottle between his hooves. "He drank from this..." There was a little something... naughty... about it, but he took a sip from it, and could swear he tasted a little tiny bit off. David? Was he tasting David? He went a dark red, embarassed at his unseemly imagination. "Stop that," he berated himself, pulling up a website that proved far less offensive.
Nothing else got in the way of their peaceful day. David even managed to get his persona finished, mostly. Joy was bidding ponies goodbye at the end of it, closing things up. David joined in the closing process, and soon the store was locked and shut.
But there was still one pony left behind. Joy gestured with a toss of her head. "This way. Time to talk. Thanks for waiting."
Gerome followed after her, David after him, up the stairs. "Oh, I don't mean to be in the way."
"Too bad." She waited at the top for both to pass her. "You are. Not the end of the world. Now, I need to know what exact kind of interest you have in him." She pointed to David. "Proper or not, I see him as a big goofy son and best friend, which means I'm ready to defend him from anything that might hurt him. You could say it's more like a grandfather? Sure, let's go with that. He's an elder I want to keep safe. You're, what... Not that old." In human terms, she was in her early 20s. David was in his 40s, and Gerome looked somewhere in his 30s. "We have a nice spread right here... So, out with it."
Joy headed into the kitchen. "No reason to chat over an empty stomach. I'm cooking tonight."
Gerome looked around, picking the sofa that they used for gaming to perch himself. "You don't have to."
"Yes I do." She rattled about the kitchen. "I'm hungry. David's hungry. I'm cooking. You are a happy accident, so enjoy."
David flumped next to Gerome. "So."
"So," squeaked out Gerome, perhaps not expecting that move. "Um... Shoot. I feel like a damn foal."
"You aren't one." David rested an arm on the back of the sofa, flopped comfortably. "None of us are."
"Right, of course." Gerome took a few breaths, steadying himself. "Right. I should stop acting like one. Your friend, Joy? She has a point."
"I usually do," came the sung retort from the kitchen.
Gerome nervously chuckled. "I don't know you yet. This is a crush. Love at first sight. As an adult... I should be getting to know you better before anything else." He applied a hoof to his face. "My friends said as much."
David flipped a hand palmside up. "So, wanna do that?"
Gerome twitched up an ear. "You're alright with that?" David didn't shy away. "Okay..." He pointed to the console laying there in front of the television. "Got a favorite game?"
David chuckled at that. "The one my friend happens to be playing."
"Valid," sang out Joy amid the sounds of sizzling and spreading pleasing aromas. "He watches more games than he plays."
"I'm actually not a big gamer." Gerome tapped his hooves. "Besides imagination games. I love those."
"I'll drink to that." David toasted with his bottled water. "Been a while since I last played one."
"What was the last one you played?" Gerome sounded more comfortable, back in familiar waters. "Foals in Darkness? Warriors of Westerby? The Lost Treasures?"
Joy emerged, a wide plate on her back. "Are those imagining games or video games? They sound familiar."
David grabbed the plate, placing it in his lap and off of her. "Thanks." He slid to the side, making room for her to hop up between him and Gerome. "This is a pony thing."
Joy cocked a brow at that. "Is it? Well, two out of three ponies at least. But I haven't seen this happen before." She looked off towards Gerome. "One stallion declaring love to another older one on meeting them? Not sure that's a pony thing."
Gerome looked between the other two. "What thing is it then?"
Joy grabbed a smaller plate off the bigger one, passing it along to Gerome, then one for herself. "It's a you thing. So, that's David. He's a human, which isn't a pony. You know next to nothing about him still. You don't even know if he has whatever parts you're hoping for. For all you know, his people meld minds to show their love."
"That would be neat... but no." David picked at the remaining plate, his by default. "I am a mammal."
"Ha, so he has the usual parts." Gerome clopped once, taking some food to nibble on right afterwards. "A well-dressed mammal."
Joy perked an ear at that. "There's a reason for that. He doesn't have fur, except up there." She pointed up at David's beard and thick curled mess of hair. "That's it. So, no clothes, he gets chilly. So on go the clothes. Not like ponies." She curled a hoof at herself. "Clothes optional. Fashion statement, but unless it's snowing out, we're not getting chilly."
"Huh." It was at that moment that Gerome really looked. It was then that he saw the exposed flesh, so much more than a pony's twitching nose or the insides of their ears. He had no twitchy nose, or ears. He had no tail, though not as obvious in his seated position.
He was an alien... "Huh... Your eyes are small."
"You eyes are big," countered David, perhaps a little too amused at the comparison.
Joy raised a hoof between them. "Good. I was hoping that'd happen. Now you're seeing what's there, instead of what you want to see. We're all delightful freaks." She folded her arms. "So, still want some of that?"
Gerome reached across Joy, for David. "May I?" David didn't say yes, but he also didn't say no, or move away, or do anything to stop it, so Gerome touched him, patting his side and upwards slowly. "Huh..."
"Different, isn't it?" Joy leaned back, giving room. "But he's still a creature, like us. He breathes, he eats, he sleeps. All the good and bad of being alive, just in a different wrapper."
Gerome pulled his hoof back. "Um... I was being very stupid..."
Joy crossed her arms. "What are you thinking now then?"
"I'm thinking I'm too good at seeing what I want to see."
"About that." Joy leaned in, frowning. "You both can see things up here?" She tapped at her head. "I thought that was just ponies being all fancy and flowery. A metaphor! I mean, I can imagine things, but not like that. I imagined this store, but I couldn't see it until I built it..."
David brought down a hand gently on her head. "I can vouch that your head is working just fine." He ran a finger along her ear, teasing it up and down slowly and making it twitch gently. "It's just one of those things. Some people do it one way, others not. Some can catch a ball, I'm pretty awful at it."
"Catch a ball?" Joy grabbed a poofy thing she had lying around. "I've seen you tossing things up and down. What do you mean you can't catch something?"
Gerome shook his head quickly. "I'm not much for sports."
"This isn't sports," argued Joy as she raised the floofy thing. "Catch." As soon as Gerome had a hoof up, she gently lobbed it at him.
Gerome fumbled it about, but did manage to gain control of it with a phew. "T-there. Um, your turn." He send it sailing towards David.
David squawked, and it bounced off him. To his credit, he managed to snatch it while it was falling, just for it to slip from his grip and finish its trip to the ground. "If I throw it, I can usually catch it. Outside that, no assurances are given."
Gerome tapped at his cheek a moment. "Well, there. You can't see things up here, but you can catch that." He pointed to the floofy thing. "Better than me, I bet." He flopped from the couch, grabbing it. "Here." He tossed it at Joypad.
She caught it without hesitation. "I'm a gamer mare. I have reflexes, thank you." She waggled the floofy thing menacingly. "I'm going easy on both of you. But alright... I feel a little better. Tell me one other thing I have that you don't."
"A tail?"
Joy squinted at David. "That hardly counts."
"Right right." He hummed with proper thought. "You manage a brick and mortar business. I've never done that. Gerome?" Gerome shook his head quickly. "See?"
Joy raised a brow dubiously. "The way you said that... You've run a business, just not 'brick and mortar'. What's the other kind?!"
Aw dang it... "Do ponies have online businesses?"
Gerome raised a hoof. "There are ponies that make bits with their videos."
Joy nodded at that. "And businesses that sell online too. What's an online business?"
"Take a business that sells online." He gestured in the air, the cube that was the business, and a smaller thing that was the online part. "Take out the not-online parts." He removed the larger cube. "That's an online business. Only sells online, no store that you can get to without visiting the Internet."
Gerome blinked owlishly. "Wow... Would that work?"
"It worked for me, but different skills than a real store." He tapped at the sofa he was seated on. "Different bills too."
Joy raised both hooves. "Alright, I'm satisfied. We're getting off track a little." She lowered a hoof at either of the other two. "Am I getting in the way of smooches right now? Tell me, I'm not that young."
Gerome flipped his ears back as his cheeks lit up. "I have a lot to learn about him. I'm sorry... I guess I really was.. crushing... Joy snapped me out of that, but I'm still interested."
"Good!" Joy clopped in one firm strike. "Glad to hear that. How's the food?"
It was only in that moment that he remembered he was eating. "It's good! Um..." He looked between Joy and David. "So... really, what are you?" He wobbled a hoof between them.
David patted her far shoulder. "We're BFFs. Nothing more or less than that."
"That." Joy nodded in agreement. "He does have hoof 'thing', so watch out for that."
"Hoof thing?" Gerome looked at one of his own hooves. "He has hands."
"He sure does." Joy leaned towards Gerome. "Which makes him jealous of hooves. He will play with yours, eventually, I bet. Just a thing he does. Harmless."
That got David to look awkward. "I would only do that with someone I'm already pretty close to."
Joy brightened. "Thanks for that vote of confidence there..." She coughed into a hoof. "So get closer so he'll play with your hooves. That's your goal line right there. Plays with hooves? You made it to the next level!"
Gerome sat up. "Um. I thought... I thought you didn't want me to do that."
"I didn't want some crushed pony to do stupid things at my friend," countered Joy. "We broke you out of that, so you're just a pony now. And if a pony wants to get close to David, cool. Just didn't want a fanboy or a love at first sighter doing it." She hopped down and began collecting plates. "You two are adults, adult it out."
Gerome tapped his hooves in the air. "So... Which imagining games did you play? You didn't say."
"Wow." Joy snickered softly. "I should have seen that coming."
David ignored her for the moment. "The games I played are all from a world away." Maybe a reality away? Little real difference. "Some similarities, some differences. I used to write for them and GM them all the time."
Joy and Gerome had the same question, "Gee Em?"
"Game Master." David pointed at himself. "Someone has to tell the story everyone else is playing, right?"
"Oh, that!" Gerome nodded quickly. "I never... had the bravery to do that... You have to know all the rules! You're the one that has to make the game fun for everypony there... You did that?"
Joy blinked owlishly. "You're a game console? No fair! I could have been playing you and you didn't tell me?! This is an injustice!" She stomped a hoof with a dull thud on the sofa. "I demand justice!"
David laughed at the idea. "Almost, not exactly. Still, if you want a game, I'm up for running it." He glanced towards Gerome. "Do they have VTTs around here?"
"V what?"
That was an answer, possibly... "Imagining games, but online?"
"Oh, no..." He pointed to the console there next to the TV. "That's close kinda?"
Shoot, a human thing... "Dang." He didn't know the local programming languages, so being the first to do it felt pretty out of reach... "Still, all you need is your--"
"--don't say it," growled Joy. "I thought that was just a thing ponies say, like reaching for the stars. Nobody reaches for the stars, but we say it all the time. But, surprise, 'imagination' is a thing ponies do literally! Ugh." She grumped. "Can you play this without that?"
Gerome curled a hoof to his chin. "You understand the idea of going on grand adventures, right?"
"Just went on one." Joy pointed to the console. "Go on them all the time."
David patted her gently on the back. "Then you can play, if you want to go on an adventure. Maybe more visuals, and less theatre of the mind."
"You have a whole theatre up there?" Joy peered at David's head suspiciously. What was he fitting up there?
"Still, sounds fun." David had ended up between the two, Joy no longer serving as a buffer. He hand a hand on either's back. It was good that ponies seemed to enjoy a good little petting with a bonus if scritches were involved from a creature they were alright with. "If you two like playing, I can run a game."
Gerome angled an ear, which was invitation for it to be brushed. "But you're still learning the game."
"Best way to learn." David shrugged. "I've been running, not playing, for most of my life. Nobody runs it the way I want to, usually. Call it picky."
Gerome flinched at that. "You're not going to join the other game then?"
Joy swatted him from across David. "Stop putting words in his mouth. Poor thing only has room for a few at a time." She pointed at her snout, clearly with room for more words.
David shook his head. "I said I'm joining, so I am. I was just explaining my usual habits. So, yeah, let's play some games."
"Which one?" gushed out Gerome. "For starters, I say Foals in Darkness is pretty great. Less rules, get right to the story."
David plinked up one finger. "Well, guess I'm grabbing a book then."
Joy slid to the ground. "Just like that? From nothing to running it. You are something else." She turned in place. "Well, you got your answer. Are you heading home, or do you want to watch me play a game? I'm not cancelling today's chapter." She went over and got the console warming up. "We're at a good part."
"We are." David returned his hands to himself, resting idly in his lap area. "And I'm watching. You can hang out, or not. You're an adult, so choose."
Gerome inclined his head left. "Hum." He tilted it to the right the other way. "Alright..." He flopped down on his belly and soon his head was softly pinning David's hands. "I'll stay."
David colored faintly with a pony head pinning his hands to his lap. That wasn't the original goal. Still, raising a fuss wasn't what he wanted to do, and it was harmless, right? He sat back and just tried to relax as the game started under Joy's skilled hooves taking them on the further adventures. "We were just on a boss."
"Who I will crush. I know their weakness." Joypad exploited that weakness without mercy, putting quick work to the 'boss' and moving on with the story without much delay. "Shoulda seen me the first time I ran into that. Wow, I spent like a full day bashing against it. That was something."
Gerome nodded from his comfy human pillow. "I can imagine."
"There's that word again." She turned her head sharply to scowl, which turned into a surprised yelp. "Hey! You... know where your head is, right?"
"Huh?" Gerome sat up though. "What? I've... Uh, sat against a pony before." But ponies did not have laps. "Did I hurt you?! Sorry!"
David raised his freed hands defensively. "No, no. I'm not hurt. Now, I admit, I tend to only do media once. So going back over a boss I figured out isn't something I run into often."
Joy snorted at that. "Half the fun." She turned around, things seeming to be under control. "You're going home when we're done."
"Huh?"
"Did I stutter?" She didn't turn. "This is your first visit. Don't push your luck. He'll still be here tomorrow."
"Oh, alright." Gerome chuckled softly. "You have a fierce little defender there. Youngest of us, but not to be crossed."
"I can hear you." Not that this stopped her from pressing on in the game. "Age only means so much when everypony involved is an adult, with a... Hey, what is your job, Gerome?" Joy's job was hardly a secret, them sitting on the roof of her store.
"That's a fair question." He curled on himself and drew out a slim book. It was not an imagining book, instead showing a living room. "I use my talents. I'm a decorator. Since I can, uh, see what things would look like, I can get a good... view... to see what works and what doesn't."
David whistled. "Interior decorator? Neat. I'm a photo model, and a writer. I'd rather do more of the latter, if I'm being asked."
"Which you are." Gerome slid to his hooves. "I've pushed my luck plenty. I'll be back." He dug out his phone as he put his book away. "Share?" They touched phones to be sure their contact info was swapped. "You too." He trotted up to Joy on three hooves, one still holding his phone.
Joy paused the game and swiveled towards Gerome. "Heading out?" She dug out her phone to tap against his. "You're leaving on a good note. Better than I've managed."
Gerome took a step away before the words reached him. "Something bad happened?"
Joy waved it off. "One reason of many I'm here playing watcher for a friendly alien. Shoo." She made the dismissive little waves of her hooves. "See you tomorrow, or whenever you stop by. It's a store, we're open basically every day. Hours on the door!"
"Right." He wandered towards the exit, which meant passing David. "You get your persona done?"
"All done." David fired a thumbs up. "It was easy enough once I got into it."
"Oh, good. See you later then." He waved and headed down the stairs.
David hopped up to his own feet. "I'll make sure the door's locked."
"Good call." She left the game paused, watching as David vanished down the steps.
He found the door closed, but not locked. It wasn't like Gerome had a key to do anything about that. David twisted the knob with a satisfying thunk, securing the property. "Not like a lot of ponies are looking to make trouble." It was a good little society with good little ponies, by and by. Probably why Gerome didn't even think about it, he guessed.
What he didn't expect was the sudden sharp thump when he started back for the stairs. Wheeling around, a pony was recovering from crashing into the door. Her beret was a giveaway. "Gloomy?" He went to pop open the door. "What brings you around so late?"
"Hi there." Onyx slipped inside, her magic closing the door behind her. "I forgot to talk to you!"
Hoofsteps came from the stairs. "Who's that?" Joy poked her snout free to see it. "Oh, Onyx. Hey there."
"Hey." Onyx waved with a little smile. "I just remembered I came here for a reason, to talk..."
"What about?" Joy took up the position next to David. "We're here."
"Sure, what's on your mind?" added David with a handroll.
"I can't remember!" Onyx stomped the ground with a hoof. "I know it was important, but I can't remember... I must sound so dumb..."
Joy blinked softly. "Well, you are a friend, forgetting or not. Want to join us for videogames?"
Onyx was still a moment, but a shaking nod emerged. "Y-yeah, that sounds pretty great actually."
"Where's your doll?" David pointed to where a doll once perched with Onyx's beret. "Gruff voice? Hard to miss."
Onyx's eyes went wide as saucers. "That's one thing I forgot.... Thank... you for reminding me. I don't know where he is. I hope he's alright." Still, she went with them back upstairs towards the game.
"You two were so attached." Not that David could remember it all that well either... "Weren't you doing something?"
"He was... I was... I'm safe now." She nodded with certainty at that, looking around Joy's home. "Oh! Did I ever see this before? You have a nice place." She threw herself bodily on the couch, flopping upon it. "Love it."
Joy grinned at the antics. "Glad you like it. You like game?" She pointed to her paused game. "I'm about to get back into mine."
Onyx curled a hoof to her chin. "Got any rhythm ones? I could do with one or two of those. I'll spin beats that'll make your head spin. You may not lose, but I'll definitely win."
David snapped his fingers. "There's the rhyme. You must be feeling better."
"I really am." She sat up, giving room for David to crash next to her. "Thank you both for being friends. You're welcome at my place again sometime. With less... sick episodes, I hope. You feel better, David?"
"Way better." The reminder made him rub his back, but there wasn't a pain there anymore, but he had been reminded of it, and was grateful it was gone. "No brain fog either... I wonder if I'm cured, or if it's in remission. No way to check."
Joy and Onyx shrugged in shared cluelessness. Onyx raised a hoof. "If you feel better now, good. Just don't feel bad mentioning if that changes."
"Hear hear," rooted Joy. "You're our favorite old guy. We want to hear if you're feeling down."
Onyx inclined her head. "How old is he?"
"Low to mid 40s?" offered David with a shrug. "Not sure if human years line up with pony years."
Onyx shrugged at that idea. "No idea. Going by your mane..." She waved over David's fluffy hair. "You're not young. Still, you're not ancient either, way too few wrinkles. You're a distinguished adult."
Joy nodded at that as she got the game going. "I can go with that. Pony or not. Stupid question, since it's not a thing any of us can do, but if you could be a pony, would you want to be?"
"If you could be a human, would you want to be?" countered David with a raised brow and folded arms.
"I had that coming." Joy pressed on in the game. "I don't think I'd like that, even if your fingers look like an edge if you got good at them. I like this-Joy. Me-Joy makes me happy." She smiled at that, starting a cutscene and leaning back to let it play at an easily read pace. "Does you-David make you happy?"
Both ponies noticed that it took too long for an answer. Onyx poked him first. "Does it not?"
"Tricky question!" He folded an arm up. "It's what I got, and there aren't a lot of options, so, being a pragmatist, I work with what I have." He curled several fingers around Onyx's snout, capturing her. "I do like being able to do this." He brought in his other hand to tickle at the underside of her snout. "And this." He had her at his mercy, making her giggle and struggle weakly at his tickles. "Worth the price."
Joy smirked, but didn't turn to face the shenanigans. "Don't torture her. You and your hoof fetish. You know, a pony's frog isn't just heart shaped, they're literal little hearts. Every step." She tapped a hoof against her controller. "Every step helps blood get back up our long legs back into the rest of us. Hoof to heart? That saying has a lot of meanings."
David released Onyx to consider that line of philosophy. "That's really nice... A human hand or foot doesn't have that connection, but both are sensitive." He wriggled his fingers at Onyx. "Hey, since it came up, what do you do for a living?"
Onyx pointed at herself. "Me? I'm a musician." With a glowing horn, she drew out a saxophone and played a few notes with a big grin. "Stop on by and I'll play a few songs for you."
Joy thrust up a hoof, still facing away from them. "No musical joining unless you know the songs to the game." She pointed to her TV. "On the other hoof, if you do know those songs, I wanna hear!"
"I don't... But I'll look up the sheet music." With her glowing horn, she put her saxophone aside. "There'll be music somewhere online, right?"
"I bet." David reached then for a horn. "I'll vote with Joy in looking forward to hearing that."
They were all ready to hear live-performed game music.
David walked purposefully to the hobby store, full of all sorts of games and things. He went right to the imagining shelf with a duty. He was a hunter, at least when he shopped. He preferred knowing what he wanted and going directly to it. As a bonus, it lowered the ability of a store to distract money from him buying unrelated things.
He was there for games! Pony games of the imagination. He ran his finger along the spines. "Foals in Darkness," he announced to himself, plucking the first book free. A quick check told him it was a game with six-sided dice, and nothing else. "Alright, basic." He went around to the dice collections and grabbed a box filled with nothing but a lot of classic six-sided dice, ready for rolling.
"Seriously?" Posey was staring at David, brow raised. "Good, fine! Learn how to do something that isn't crashing into ponies for the fun of it."
Ah, right, his magic. He had forgotten all about it and its little benefits in the storm of reaching for professional fulfillment. "Sorry about that. You alright?"
"I'm fine." She glanced away a moment. "Not like you care."
"Of course I care." He had cared about Posey when she was a world away. "Sorry so many things like to use you as a target. Not fair."
"No... No it's not." Posey watched him with guarded eyes. "Are you trying to butter me up?"
"Calling it as I see it." He wandered towards the front to pay for his book and dice. "You don't seem like a bad pony."
"I... try not to be?" She trailed after him, a little confused. "Was that the question?"
"I guess it wasn't." A tap of his phone on a terminal completed the transaction and he turned back to Posey. "I'm getting ahead of things. I'll do my best not to ruin your days again."
"Thanks?" She kept right on following him out of the store. "I don't get you."
"What's to get?" He paused a short distance out of the store.
"You came out of nowhere, get arrested, get sent over there." Posey pointed down the block at the internet café. "And now you're like a local celebrity? What even are you?! And don't start with the videogame. You did not crawl out of a videogame!" She stomped a hoof with emphasis on that point she was prepared to defend to the last breath. "So what are you and where did you come from?"
"Easy." He doublechecked his book was tucked properly and shoved the dice into a pocket. "How technical do you want me to be?"
Posey flopped to her haunches. "What, really?"
"Do you want biological nitty gritty?"
She stared at him in befuddlement. "So you're not... just blowing me off?"
"Why would I? Perfectly valid question. I'd want to know the same thing if we swapped places."
Posey gave out a strained laugh. "Yeah! Right, of course..." She curled a hoof to her chin. "Well, start basic. I'm not a scientist."
"Alright." David considered his origin, basic. "I was born the old fashioned way from two other things of my species, like most of you I assume. Two different tribes."
Posey leaned left and right. "I don't see any extra parts. What tribes are we talking? I'm just guessing here, but you look like an earth pony of whatever you are."
"I am, taken from the pony perspective." He hiked a thumb at himself with a shrug. "Humans, that's me, we differentiated by how we looked, mostly, and how we sound. Cultural marks also were important. If someone didn't celebrate the same holidays, that was a sign of a difference. If they had different sayings, or even a different language--"
"You had different languages?" Posey scowled at him. "You had one species, just one, and you made up different languages? Why?! Just talk one and get it over with. Wouldn't that be easier?"
David chuckled softly. "Wouldn't that be nice? Alright, we'll go with one language." She pointed at Posey. "It's not this one though, so you'll have to learn the new one. No choices. We made up our mind. One language for everyone."
Posey cocked a brow. "What? Why wouldn't we stick with this one." She waved between herself and David. "It's working just fine."
"Sure, but other ponies over there." He pointed to the horizon. "They have theirs and they don't want to give it up either. There was a big vote, or they flipped a coin. Whatever, their language won. Ready to learn it and give up this one?"
"Huh..." She scowled, an expression she knew well. "I hate it. But I get it... I'm going to hope we never run into that. So, alright, you crazy humans separated all kinds of ways because 'ha ha, that one's red, and 'ha ha, that one's brown' and 'you talk that way? Weird!'
"You are quick on the take there." He fired a finger gun at Posey with a faux electronic noise. "I'm impressed. So, yeah, those were our tribes. Anyway--"
"--So how'd you get here?" She tapped at the ground. "And where are all those humans? I don't see any but you."
David went to a bench to sink on it. "I don't entirely know, but I do know."
"So do you know or not?" Posey cocked a brow at him anew, sitting in front of him. "Has to be one or the other."
"Do you read?"
Posey started at that. "What? Of course I can read!"
"I'm asking if you read, as a habit. Novels. Stories. That kind of thing." David rolled a hand as he went over it. "Do you?"
"Sometimes... Why?" She hopped up onto the same bench, peering at him. "You have a book on this?"
"I don't, sorry." He folded his hands in front of himself. "But I can weave a tale. Pretty sure that's happening right now. For me to be happy, I'm better off not thinking about that."
"What?" A flat question, dripping with doubt. "What are you talking about?"
David turned his hands palmside up. "This is getting into philosophy. Have you ever heard the idea that the world is a dream?"
"Philo--oh." She regarded David in a new light. "I thought that was above most pony's heads."
"I'm a little taller, not above mine," joked David. "So, you have?"
"Sure?" Posey shrugged. "The only thing we know for sure is that life is suffering."
David winced at that. "Sorry." He felt bad for Posey in that moment, but how to help eluded him.
"Don't look like that." she waved a hoof at the idea, banishing it. "I like more of it than not, so here I am! Anyway, what about it? Life's a dream, great, now what?"
"For every dream." He extended a finger on his right hand. "There is a dreamer." He put up a finger on his right hand, bringing the two fingers together, side by side. "Except, in this case, I am the dream, and I know who the dreamer is. But it's not me. I'm not the dreamer. But I also am, sorta?"
Posey nodded slowly along with the words. "You are getting heavy. Alright, so who is the dreamer? I'll tell them to stop bothering me!"
"That'd be nice." He reached for her head, but she ducked away from the incoming fingers. "Sorry." She relaxed the moment he stopped trying to touch her. Not all ponies were equally pettable. "So... This is where it gets a bit odd, and easy to assume I'm talking nonsense."
"Try me." It sounded like a dare, as if she couldn't be scared that easily.
"Alright... Imagine another me, back in that other world, creating a dream, this one." He hiked a thumb at himself. "I'm just a dream, his dream. A dream of himself. You've had dreams with you in it, probably all the time, but dream-you isn't the same as waking-you."
"Sure..." She looked herself over and back at David. "I'm not a dream."
"Most dream-people are very sure of that." David crossed his arms. "But here we are."
"Heavy... Heavy... But alright, let's give your philosophy the benefit of the doubt." She sat up, looking interested rather than terrified. "Alright, you are a dream. Which means I'm a dream, since that's how dreams work. What's the point? Why should I worry about making a dream work right? If it's miserable, and just a dream, why not quit?"
"Because it doesn't matter if it's a dream or not." David wagged a finger. "Life may be a dream, but we won't know for sure until it's over, and we wake up, or whatever. If you're a side character in a dream, 'waking up' may just mean ceasing to exist. I think you like existing."
"Existing is where I keep all of my things." She thumped the bench. "I'm not giving them up, human. So why, if you're the dreamer, the dreamed of the dreamer at least, aren't you living like a king?"
David shrugged at that. "I have friends, and am financially stable, and learning new things. This is a good dream."
Posey recoiled. "Wait. You didn't have those before?" David shook his head. "But... Huh... Humans. Alright, so you're having a nice dream. Why are you bothering with me then? I'm just raining on your sunshine parade."
"Because you are a pony." He would have preferred person, but why confuse her? "Dream or not, you are, for the moment, worthy of my attention and care. I hope you'd return the favor if it looked like I was in need. Being able to help, even in being a distraction, is another good thing."
Posey shrugged at that. "But you know you are a dream. If you're in trouble, so what? You'll wake up."
"Will I?" David cocked a brow at that. "I don't think I would, well, unless my dreamer... No. I'm stuck with the one I have. The dreamer will be fine, but I wouldn't be. One life, and that's alright. I like this one."
"If you have an in with the dreamer." She pointed up at her head. "Make them give me a fancy hat."
"They already heard you, but I doubt they'll do it." No hat was appearing on Posey's head. "He prefers to play by the rules. So unless there's a reason for a hat to land on your head, a hat won't land on your head."
"Lame." She hopped down to the ground. "Still, thanks. That was an interesting little thought. So you got here by being dreamed here, huh? That's pretty far out there."
"It's the truth as I know it." David shrugged. "But I prefer not to dwell on that. I have a life here, and I plan to live it."
"See, that's a good philosophy in general." Posey turned to start down the road. "Speaking of that, I have things to get to. I have one life, and I'm going to live it." She winked at David with more force than required. "Good luck with yours."
"Seeya." He waved at her departing form and rose up himself, stretching to the sky with a loud grunt of the stretch. "Alright!" He had a book to read! He resumed his trip home. It wasn't a long trip by any measure, just a few minutes of a hike and he turned into Joy's place, to wave and greet the ponies that spotted him coming in.
"Hey!" Pippster rushed up with a big smile. "Got time for a match?"
He had planed to get to reading, but saying no to the hopeful colt? Mmm, no, he couldn't do that. "Sure, but I haven't gotten much better at it." That didn't matter to the foal, who eagerly took his position and loaded up the track. David sank at another terminal and soon they were racing at simulated fast speeds down an equally imagined track. There were no prizes for winning or prices for failing. It was all for fun, and sometimes that was good enough.
"David!" came the excited cry of one of the local stallions that visited the store as he hurried in. "Look!" He had one hoof up, phone attached, but it was hard to see what he meant as he was waving it with way too much excitement.
Joy put a hoof in the way of the flailing arm, causing it to stop dead as she chuckled. "Hold it still if you want anypony to actually see it."
"Right, sorry." He sat and held up the phone for David and Joy both, bringing up his other hoof to press at the screen and get the video to start from the beginning.
An announcer began talking in a mysteriously forceful way about a world in peril.
Joy cocked a brow. "Woah, wait, gimmie the address of that." She poked the pause button. A few moments later, she had it up on one of the big TVs for everypony there to watch at the same time. Most turned their attention to it as it played, the advertisement for the next game in the hit series, featuring snippets of David in strange and exotic places, delivering his lines.
David laughed nervously. "Hey... That came out better than I thought it would."
A pity the ponies around him were too busy clapping and stomping in a cheer at what they had just seen.
Joy waved both hooves over the room. "You can be sure I'll get that the day it's released, if not ahead of time."
The cheering only grew louder. Pippster waved excitedly at David. "Are you going to be in the game?"
"I wasn't told I'd be? But I wasn't told I wouldn't be either?" He shrugged helplessly. "More up to them than me, but they didn't have me record game lines... I think..." He had recorded a lot of lines. Were some for a game? "I actually hope not."
Pippster started. "Why not? I'd love to be in a game! Why wouldn't you want to be in the game?"
David turned both hands on himself, to his chest. "For one, I'm not a voice actor. If they use those lines there, I may just die of shame. That commercial was already pretty epically campy."
"Epically awesome," countered Pippster, bouncing up and down. "You were perfect."
Joy set a hoof on his head, preventing further jumps. "Easy there. We're our own worst critic. I hate the sound of my own voice, so I get it. Still, that was... amazing! Congratulations." Other voices of encouragement rose up around the room, joining Joy.
David waved at all the smiling ponies, but also slipped free of the attention. "Got other work to do." And he fled upstairs.
Joy shook her head. "Silly. Alright, let's get back to it." And thus she resumed monitoring game time for the others.
Upstairs, he sat down with the book and nudged at it. "Hmmph." It was a fine game, by his estimation, but it was 95% narrative. The dice were there because clickety-clackety math rocks were fun, but working with or around them was very much not the focus of things. It didn't use a grid, relying entirely on the theatre of the mind.
Which one of them didn't even have!
No, not the kind of game he liked, nor the one that'd fit the situation. David pushed the book away with a grunt. "Let's jump in the deep end." He fetched a different book, for the game he was playing with Gerome. Sure, it had more rules, which he was alright with, but... "Any game can be played with a kid depending on who's running it." And he was running it! He was sure he could manage it.
"Best of all..." It did use a grid, and expected maps. There'd be a solid thing to see and touch and think about, instead of focusing entirely on waking dreams. "Not that there's anything wrong with those." He retreated into his room, where a computer had been setup for typing on.
With furious click-clacks, he put together the most basic of intro blurbs for later reading. "Time to seduce a new person into the wonders of TTRPGs!" He clapped his hands together, rubbing them with a bit of a goofy smile. "This'll be fun. First..." He saved and closed the document. "Accessories."
He grabbed his phone and pressed a contact. A few moments later, it picked up. "Allo?" It was Gerome. "Sorry, but you caught me at work, what's wrong?"
Ah, right, work. That was a thing some people did. "Sorry. If you're in the middle of something, you can hang up, not trying to be a pain."
"N-no! I have a moment. What's up?"
David could imagine the worried look on the poor pony's face. "Just a little thing. Where do you suggest getting miniatures and maps and things for a proper imagining game?"
"Oh! That sounds fun actually." The tension was defeated instantly. "How about we meet after work and I'll take you to my favorite shop for that kind of thing?"
David cited the name of the place he'd been going to. "I didn't see a lot of materials there, but they had books, and dice."
"They're not dedicated to this kind of game. Good enough, but there are better. After work." And he hung up.
David was cross a moment, but he had given permission to do exactly that. "Such is life." He descended into the shop and its loudly supportive ponies. He helped out with running the shop and hanging out in, what he saw, a fine way to while away the rest of the day, at least until his phone buzzed.
It was Gerome, with a map coordinate. David tapped it and instructions popped into being, showing the way to get there. "I'm off to do some shopping!"
"Get me something," teased Joy.
"I plan to." He left her, confused and surprised, and got to walking with a purpose free of the store and down the street.
"Hey." Someone grabbed him by the arm, and it wasn't a hoof, which was odd. It was a human ."Hey. Man, it's been... fricken ages since I saw another one of us."
David cringed and backed out of the line of traffic. "Woah, um, hey there." Yep, human, caucasian, male. Looked like a bit of a nerd? "Brony?"
"Y-yeah. You too?" The stranger laughed. "Just kinda... here?"
"That can happen..." David considered his competitor. Well, he was no longer the only human at all... "I'm David, by the way."
"Paul." He shrugged. "So... how are you surviving?"
"Got a job." David extended a finger. "Started writing. "A second finger. "And got another job." A third finger. "Busy times, but good times. You?"
"I just got here... I have no idea what I'm doing. But I don't want to sleep on the streets."
"I imagine not." David considered properly. "Get to the Pegasus city, I forget the name... Not Cloudsdale.. Anyway, get there and look for Pegasoft. They'll be super happy to have a human that isn't already hooked up with things."
"Really?" His expression brightened with hope for the future. "That's a great tip. Uh, not to be a pain... but I really got nothing."
Right. "Got a phone?"
"Nothing." He dug out a phone anyway, showing it off.
It was a human phone, from the human lands. "Try turning that on. It may work, or not. We won't know until you try."
"Point." He got it clicked on with a flash screen of its manufacturer and the carrier that was a world away. "Almost... almost..." And finally a desktop. "And..." His eyes were locked at where bars would appear... and two appeared. "Hey! Great."
"Fantastic." David dug out his own. "You got some kinda money app?"
"Venmo?"
"We can try." David shrugged. "Pull it up.
Soon David was able to scan the QR Code displayed and send some bits to Paul. "Enough to survive the journey. Maybe just get a ride there? There are carriages."
"Thanks again! I'll check that out." Looking far less worried for his immediate future, Paul set off with adventure in his eyes and a swinging in his arms.
"Good deed of the day, complete." David made an electronic song of victory and resumed his journey to where Gerome had given the location to. It was a game store, but not like the one he had been visiting. This one was clearly aimed at, well, gamers, tabletop gamers and war gamers. Adventurous signs and posters were everywhere as he walked in. Ponies rolled many-sided dice and storytellers hid behind their screens, plotting the doom of the others at the table.
"This... is perfect." He looked around a moment, ah, there was Gerome, waving at him. It wasn't hard to find David in a crowd of ponies, as it turned out. He hurried over to his equine friend. "Hey. This place looks great!"
"Because it is." Gerome did a little dance in place more befitting a pony half his age. "So what did you need it for? You have what you need for the game already."
"For playing, and even then." David wandered over to a display case that was full of ponies and the various monsters ponies imagined existed. "Nice." And... "Hey." He tapped at the case. "They got a few humans."
"One of many options." Gerome came up beside David. "I know a few games that borrowed the idea. Those are not, technically, humans."
"Technically?" They had two arms and two legs. They looked pretty fantasy human from where David was standing. "How are they not?"
"Legalities," sang out Gerome with a snicker. "They weren't made by Pegasoft, so they're not called humans. Any similarities is 100% coincedence." He tapped a hoof on the display. "You wanted one?"
"Hi there." A mare came up on them with a smile. "Looking to get some figures?" She seemed to notice David fully just then. "Hey! What are you doing outside the case?!" She giggled at her own joke. "Seriously, I heard about you. Nice commercial."
Shoot, he was becoming a celebrity, of a minor sort. "Hey there. Actually, I did want to get some figures, and map supplies. I want to run a game for some friends and I want it to look nice. Can you hook me up?"
The mare clapped her hooves. "Of course I can, or they misnamed me."
Gerome waved at her. "This is Carty, or as she prefers, Cartogropher."
Carty tipped the hat on her head. "Nice to meetcha! I hear you're livening up Joy's place. What's it take to get a share? If you like imagining games, we got room for a human too."
Actually... "If I ran my games here, could I borrow the map pieces and figures?"
"Of course." She clip-clopped her hooves with growing excitement. "The least I can offer. Hey, wait, you like imagining games?"
"I'm a writer. I plan to publish an expansion." He pointed to where the book it was based on sat. "For that."
Her eyes followed his pointing. "Seriously? Wild." She went over and grabbed the book, bringing it over. "This one?" She turned the book left and right.
"That one," he agreed. "It's not that far off from what I already knew. It has a pony slant on everything, but that's hardly surprising."
"Fancy that," she allowed with a wry smile, looking to Gerome instead. "Jerry!" A nickname. "You know him?"
Gerome nodded. "He's in my game," he announced with obvious pride. "And you plan to run one?"
"I plan to. With Joy and On... Onyx, right." He looked quite happy about getting that name. "I'll teach them how to play and have a good time."
Gerome clapped lightly. "I want to join. I'll be the one that you don't have to explain every rule to."
"Tempting." Having an experienced player could be nice... "But are you alright joining a newbie game with newbies making silly mistakes without harping on them about it?"
"Hm..." Convenient distraction. "That one looks a little like you."
David sat behind a tall GM screen. He had a tablet between himself and it, having pulled up a suite of assisting software to speed things along. "You push forward into that foggy hallway, each step echoing off the wet bricks around you. You have only yourself and your trusted friends to rely on, knowing danger lurks from every other angle."
Onyx squeaked and hugged Joypad for security while Gerome grinned like he was enjoying it a bit much.
David let a d20 roll. It meant nothing. It meant everything. His players could hear it, and know he was thinking wicked thoughts of the one who prepared the trouble ahead of them. "The smell of the fog becomes denser, fouler with every step."
Joypad reached onto the table and nudged her figure forward, a brave knight of a pony. "Well, I'm not scared. What do I see, besides fog?"
Onyx willed her piece forward in her magic. "I'm right behind her!"
The store had a vast treasure trove of pieces. David never actually got to play with those before, but it was fun, so he grabbed some, extending the hallway they were in. "You come into a larger room." He spread out the walls to either side, piecing the room they were entering. "The fog abates somewhat, allowing you to, barely, see the other side. There..." He slapped down a little dias with a chest on it. "You see something glittering."
Gerome brought his hooves together. "Is that what we came for?"
"Too easy." Joypad nudged her figure closer. "But we won't know if we don't check it out."
"Unfortunately..." David set down another pony, and another. "It seems you're not alone. Emerging from the same fog from other angles come other would-be adventurers, their eyes locked on that prize. They spot you as you spot them, surprise on their faces." He leaned one figure back, shaking it a bit as if to imitate it talking. "'Who're you?! We got here first!' proclaims the one in front, an agitated pegasus with a scowl as wide as their wings."
Joypad tossed her mane, looking to the little angry figurine and leveling a hoof at them. "Well, that's not how I saw it. That chest was right in front of us before you all showed up."
Onyx shook her head quickly. "Let's not be rash."
David leaned back another figurine, an earth pony. "'Y-yeah! Let's... stay calm,' agrees one of their side." He switched back to the pegasus leader. "'Stay calm?!'" He shook the figure angrily with their words. "'How can I stay calm? They want to take our stuff!'"
Joypad threw up her hooves. "We don't even know what's in there yet! We could be arguing over nothing!"
David turned both minis towards Joypad's minis. Quiet filled the area. The earth pony figure was nudged forward. "'She has a point...'"
David sat back. "Sounds like it's time for a roll." He locked eyes with Joypad. "You can try a Kindness roll, taking Onyx's suggestion, or..."
"A loyalty roll." Joypad was already bouncing a d20 between her hooves. "Because they aren't taking our stuff."
"Which will it be?" David leaned forward, fingers steepled. "Your choices affect your party."
Gerome raised a hoof. "We can at least check out what it is before we get worked up about it."
David jumped. His phone was ringing melodically suddenly. "Who?" He knew Joypad was right there. There weren't many other ponies he'd pause for. He swatted his phone until it quieted. "Sorry about that."
Joypad huffed. "Alright, alright." She let the die fly. "Let's see what we're fighting about first." The die tumbled and rolled, slowing to a 14. "That good enough?"
"What's your score?" asked David, pointing at her sheet.
Joypad grabbed her sheet and pulled it up for a look. "My kindness is... 12."
Sensing an opportunity, he looked to Onyx. "Want to help?"
"Sure!" Onyx willed her d20 out in an energetic arc that ended in a 16. "Woo! Just had the put the beat down." She drummed her hooves on the table with excitement.
"With your calm voices, you two manage to ease the situation." He nudged the pegasus forward. "He agrees to wait and see what it is. Maybe it's nothing good, and even if it is, you could all talk it out, right?"
Joypad looked uncertain of that, but Gerome shoved his piece forward. "I search for traps."
That was a more experienced thing to immediately think of. Maybe there had been a trap there, maybe not, but David called for a check, and announced that one had been spotted.
"Oh ha! I'm ready for this." He waggled his die so excitedly. "Gonna disarm that trap." The mares were cheering him on as he made his roll. 1. His face fell, hooves clopped to faces with communal despair.
Onyx flipped her sheet over suddenly with a twinkling horn. "Wait. Wait wait! I got this!" She thrust the paper at David. "This!" She curled a hoof around to point at a part. "This helps, right?"
David had to push the paper back for a look. 'Timely saver,' read the Feat's name. "Oh, right. Sec." He did not remember exactly what that did. He grabbed the rulebook and flipped it open rapidly to find the answer. "Timely saver... uh hmm... and then... Alright!" He set the book down open to the page. "That means you get a check to save your troubleshooter at the last second. Let's see it."
Onyx grinned so broadly her cheeks squeaked with the effort. "In the nick of time--" She flung the die out. "You will stop, on a dime!" The die stopped, not glowing with her magic. 20. Cheers erupted, not just from the players, but other ponies that had been wandering past and took notice of the dramatic moment.
"Razor sharp needles explode in all directions." He made an explosive gesture out from the chest. "Ready to impale your friend, but you're there." He grabbed Onyx's figure, but it began to move on its own.
Onyx floated it over with a dramatic, "Nooooo!" as her piece collided with Gerome's, both falling to the side.
David nodded at the two fallen tokens. "Knocked down, but largely unharmed, quiet settles on the room." The applause in the room grew louder with the excitement of the play. "But they have words about it." He wiggled the pegasus with their words, "Hey! Did you wreck what's in there?!" He went for the earth pony. "Calm down, they almost got hurt... I'm glad we weren't--"
"Ugh!" He began stomping off the pegasus figure. "Why do I bother with you?!" And off he went, stomp stomp stomp.
Onyx willed her figure back upright. "That was nuts... Hey, thanks for being cool." She fired a hooves up at the mini of the earth pony.
"T-thanks," voiced David. "But I'm alone now..."
Joypad nudged her figure next to the earth pony. "No you're not. You got three ponies right here." She pointed to herself and the two others. "See?"
"Oh, um." David wriggled the earth pony. "I can join you?"
Gerome shrugged. "Why not? What's your specialty?" And so the party grew by one member that day, and one pony in the crowd sat down, eager to take up the shy earth pony as their character.
She giggled with joy. "I'm not that shy, but this should be fun! I'm Windy, by the way." She tapped hooves against each of the other players and David's fist.
Play devolved as the other players there, new and experienced, eagerly helped Windy create her persona, the demure earth pony that had been left behind by her adventuring partner and signed on with the next so quickly. David jumped as something nudged his elbow. It was Carty, looking with a smile. "Hey."
"Hey," she echoed back. "Sounds like all kinds of fun is happening over here" This fact clearly pleased her. "Which reminds me, when you get that book ready, you bring that over here. Pretty sure a few ponies would like to get that human book." She raised a brow. "Is it about humans?"
"Alicorns, actually." He let the others work on that character. They didn't need him for that. "I didn't see any support for them so far."
"Because they're kinda brand new." Carty shrugged. "But you're not wrong. No alicorns in any of the books... yet. Better finish fast, or you won't be the first."
"Wait." David pointed at Carty. "Do you know any layout artists? I could really use one."
Carty sank to her haunches. "Me?! I run a store, not a publishing company. You already try one of those?"
The image of human publishing companies with its myriad challenges danced in David's head... But these were ponies. surely ponies handled it differently... "Do you know one I should try?"
"Well... there's Discord House. I hear the unicorns--" She pointed the way. "Have Tree Chopper Group. Then there's Harper, and Macapple. Thos're the big one! Pick one and try them out. Worst they'll say is no, and that's free." She nodded with confidence in this. "You could try a company that makes these books." She grabbed for the book David had been using and flipped it over to show the company tag on the bottom front. "But you're also their competitor, so... maybe? Maybe not?"
Maybe... "Worth checking, thanks." He offered a fist and got a hoof against it. Hoof to heart. "But, for now." He twirled around back at his plays. "We have adventure to get back to. Just because you got this, it's hardly the end. It's not even in there."
Joypad shrugged. "But there's a Book of Fiery Secrets. That's cool, right?" She lifted a random book that had no fiery secrets. "Oooo. Can I use the secrets?"
"You'll need some time to read it, which this place is hardly the place for. You need to find that coin, remember?"
Gerome sighed softly. "Or we can't save the town, right. Gotta focus. Book time comes later."
The game went on, with ups and downs, but they all seemed to have fun with it, to David's pleasure. "And this feels like a good break point," he announced just as a bad guy came crashing through a wall. "Will our heroes be able to stand against this? We'll find out, next week."
Onyx clapped with joy. "That was fun. I should get going home though. Thanks for inviting me!"
Joypad slid to her hooves. "Me too, but I'll be going with David. We live in the same place and all."
"Lucky." Gerome tried to hide his blush by putting his things away.
David didn't have a lot to put away. Most of his things were borrowed from the store. "Carty?" She looked up from where she had been. "Want any help straightening up?"
"I won't say no." She finished a transaction quickly. "But you don't have to. You did me a favor today."
And yet, he was already putting things away. Seeing him, Joypad joined in, then Gerome. Windy, on the other hoof, was already gone. Soon they had everything neatly placed where they had started, leaving the table nice and clean for the next group that'd come in.
They waved at Carty on the way out, but she wasn't having that, shoving a hoof in their way. "Thanks for the helping hoof. See you next week?" All three of them nodded. "Great! I'll keep your spot warm." It was only then she let them flee.
As they walked home, smiles on their faces, David's phone rang. He had ignored it before, but he wasn't in the middle of a game, so he dug it out. Pegasoft? "Hello?" He called into the phone.
"David, buddy, pal!" The excited voice of the media manager was hard to miss. "Good news and bad news."
"What's the... good news?" He clicked it over to speaker phone.
"Good news! We have another human on the team that can live locally!"
"They what?!" Joypad frowned with all the fury she clearly thought David should be feeling, but didn't seem to be. "I thought they liked what you made. They made those commercials and things!"
And a poster and an activity book. They had sent David both of those. "It's my fault," he took on with a shrug. "I sent a human I ran into towards them specifically. It must have worked out."
"Nice... but kinda dumb." Joypad shook her head. "Why would you send them your replacement?"
"Because they needed it?" David wandered the room, weighing the unseen things as he went. "I have money, and a great friend."
"Aw."
"They didn't have either. I can float on what I have and work for better." David pivoted sharply towards her. "Or I can feel bad about the one other human on the entire planet being in a bad spot and it's all my fault for being greedy. So, yeah... I set them up."
"Nice... Well." Joy prodded one of his legs. "We know who put points into kindness over here. So, got a backup plan?"
"The same I had already." He slapped a hand down on a bundle of papers. "Time to get publishing! So, heading over to see the earth pony company that's closest." He dug through the pile to draw out a list of the companies and their contact info. "I can start with a few calls really. Why waste time walking over if they don't want to hear it?"
"Logical." Joy headed for the stairs down. "I have a business to run. Sounds like you do too. If you need anything, call, alright?" She descended towards her store to begin the day.
David whipped out his phone and dialed up the first number on the list. "Hello. I'm a writer of an unofficial supplement to your game."
"Hello," echoed a stallion. "Unofficial?"
"You didn't ask me to write it." David sat by his papers. "But I did. I was hoping to work with you, if possible, to make it proper and official. Are there any paths to doing that?"
"You wouldn't be the first pony--" On a phone, noone could tell you were a human. "--to want to be involved. The standing policy is to turn away unsolicited contributions."
David winced, that was a closing door. "I have a special situation. Don't mean to name drop, but I don't suppose you know what a human is?"
"From that game?" He didn't sound like he was a fan, but he at least knew the word. Plus!
"I'm one of those, also, I wrote about alicorns, which neither you nor your competitors has done yet. You can get ahead."
"Hm. Can you wait a moment?"
"Sure."
The phone clicked, and hold music began playing gently. "With any luck..." David set the phone down on speaker phone mode. "They're talking to a boss..."
He got a cup of water and chugged it down. He wasn't very good at light sips. "Hello?" He rushed back to the phone.
"Still here." He sat next to the phone.
"Great. Are you available for a personal meeting?"
David smiled, more of a grin really. A personal meeting? Surely a good sign. "Certainly. When and where?" The secretary pony gave the time and place quickly. "Should I bring my work?"
"Shouldn't hurt." He didn't sound entirely confident on that point. "Have a nice day. Oh, is there anything else I can help with?"
"Nah, other than you having a good one too."
"Thanks." The pony hung up.
"Yes." David plugged the appointment into the phone along with the address, saving it for later use. Not like he'd be memorizing any of it. With a victorious chime from no game in particular, David pumped a fist and descended into the store.
"Hey." Joy waved as he came into view. "You look happy." She looked happy for his being happy.
David waved at a few ponies he recognized on the way over. "Sounds like I get an interview." He turned his phone so Joy could see it. "Here." It had the time and place clearly displayed. "I'll be out for that."
"Obviously." Joy cupped her hooves under her chin. "How else will you do much talking? Still, congratulations!" She brought her hooves to either side of her snout. "David's interviewing to make imagination books!" The room became a soft cirrus of clopping and stomping.
"Did you tell them the bad news?"
Joy hiked a brow. "Why should I? Just a down note on an otherwise fine day. Besides, hardly affects them." She waved it off. "And you did get paid, so... They didn't even do anything wrong, technically." Joypad turned to help a pony refill their playing card. "There you go... Now, David, you just focus on you. You're onto something, I can feel it! Go knock them for a loop."
"Yeah..." He decided to help Joy out for that day. She got a chance to not sit stoically at the register, and he got to chat it up with the local gameponies. Not a bad way to while away a day.
"And... level." Against Odds leaned back. "Always a fun part." He looked to David with a smirk. "Need any help with that?"
"Nah..." He scribbled in places, then tapped at his tablet, getting most of the level done in a snap. "Got it. Oh!" All three of them looked up. "I'll be visiting their HQ." He tapped at the book they were all playing. "See if I can't get my book official."
Even Odds laughed, clapping her hooves. "Super! No promises or nothing, but that's still really cool. Always wanted to shake hooves with those ponies."
Gerome bobbed his head. "Good luck! Can we help?"
"I doubt that." David envisioned walking in with a herd of ponies. "It's a one on one kind of deal. Maybe afterwards?"
Against shrugged. "Well, where is it?"
"Here." David dug out his event, which had the map, which he showed them all.
Against nodded. "That's a good walk. You plan to do that?"
Gerome leaned in for a good look. "I'll walk you. Um, I mean, I have a car. We can use that."
They had cars? "Cars are a thing?" he asked out loud.
That caught Gerome by surprise. "Not super popular, but sure? I need it, for work." He slid to his hooves. "Just the thing to get to this interview not looking tired."
Against burst into fresh giggles. "So, you two a thing or not?" That got both Gerome and David coloring. "Like a bunch of colts, I swear..."
Even leaned in over his screen. "Is everyone leveled?" The game had to go on, romances entirely aside.
After the game, David moved to leave, just to find his arm stuck, attached to Against's hoof. "Hey." She pulled him closer, unresisted. "I want to talk, seriously."
"About?" He tucked his books more comfortably against him.
"What else about." She pointed to the one door out. "Gerome. Do you like him, or don't you? If you don't, I'll shake him loose. If you do..." She waggled her brows. "Stop playing."
David went quiet a moment. "You are... very involved."
"You're both my friend, so..." She rolled a hoof. "So, what's the deal? Just say the truth."
"For a human, I'm pretty odd. It throws me off that dating a literal alien isn't a problem for him. I'm a xenophile."
"Xeno-whatnow?" Against turned to her brother. "Even, Zeno File? Define!"
Even rolled his eyes dramatically. "It means he likes things that aren't like him. Like an earth pony that thinks pegasi are super cute, cuter than other earth ponies even."
Against let out a little 'oh', "Well... Then what's the problem? Gerome isn't a human, so that's, what, +2 to seduction rolls right there. So be seduced. Or don't be. Do you like him or not?"
"I like being liked, but crippling self-confidence issues means I'm super worried I'll mess up while a self-defensive part picks at every imperfection, since it's way easier to say no if you convince yourself that it's a bad move in the first place," argued David, casually self-diagnosing himself. "Not a good habit."
"No, no it isn't!" Against prodded him in the belly. "And now you admitted it, so I'm calling you out. You go up to him and you tell him all the things you like about him and you get seduced, trot it all!"
"I don't even have a job right now..."
"That's another excuse." Against snorted softly. "If you two work out, he won't care. Besides, I doubt that'll stay true for too long, Mister Writer."
Each of his lovingly crafted excuses, so casually tossed aside, even stomped on. "Fine... Fine. After the interview?"
"The next time you see him," laid down Against without room for wriggling. "And I will check!"
Even thumped against her, knocking her off balance. "Stop creeping on him, sis. The greymanes can do whatever they want."
"And take forever," she gusted out with an equine snort. "Just kiss already." She giggled at that. "And tell me about it later. I invite myself to the wedding if that happens."
David casually patted her on the head, and wasn't resisted. "You got that. If it happens, you'll be fir...second on the invite list."
"Who's #1?" She huffed. "Who else could it be?"
"I can guess." Even slid the last book away, cleaning up the area.
"Joy, of course."
"Called it." Even looked smugly pleased with his deductive skills. "Hey, how's she doing, by the way?"
"We got a thing worked out." David shuffled the papers from one arm to the other. "I think she's pretty happy right now, and so am I."
"Cool cool. If she wants to play... she can."
Against's eyes widened, just to narrow as she giggled, which in turn became a whistle. "How did I not see this before? Also, you're late. Why are all the stallions around me so slow!? Is there a stallion following me at a snail's pace? Tell them to hurry up! Anyway! Joy joined a game."
Even flinched back a step. "She did?" But hope glimmered. "Did she have fun?"
David fired a thumbs up. "She's having fun, with me, Gerome, and Gloo... No, wait, Onyx." He gave the address of the store.
"I know that place, good one." Even nodded with fond memories. "Uh... can I join?"
Against jumped at her brother. "Now we're talking! Finally. Action. When's the game?"
David waved at the table they had been using. "I don't run games the same way."
"No big deal." Even sat. "Just tell me when and where."
"Alright." He texted over exactly that. "See you there. Both?"
"As if I'd miss it." Against bumped into him, head first, nudging David towards the exit. "Have fun, and tell him!"
"Right right." David made good his escape, ending the game for the moment.
"Thanks." David slid into the car that was nothing like most human cars he knew. It had no top, to start. It was comfy enough, apparently designed for ponies to sit in it more like a human might, which ponies were proving they could do with how Gerome was piloting it along with a smile. "How are you doing?"
"You're very welcome." Gerome took a gentle left, avoiding walking ponies along the way. The road had more walking ponies than other cars. "And I'm doing fine, thanks! Good luck at your interview."
"You know Against?"
"Hard to forget her." Gerome turned an ear. "Why?"
"She insisted we both get on with it, and just talk." David checked his papers, as if they could have sneakily gotten out of order. "Gerome, you seem like a very nice pony. Want to try dating and see how it works out?"
With a loud screech, the car stopped. "W-what? I... Yes."
"Good." There, all done. "Good..."
"You sound..." Gerome got the car moving. "You alright?"
"I'm not." David dared to put a hand against Gerome. "I don't know how to feel right now. Please be patient with me. It's not you."
"I... know that feeling actually." With feelings thrown out there, Gerome looked happier than not, taking them to David's appointment without other delays.
Gerome pulled the car off the road and parked it beside the building, the paint of the building glinting in the sun. "Wow... I knew where it was, but I never actually... visited."
Carefully making his way out of the car, he stood on his hooves and let out a little whicker as he shook himself off. "I hope they say yes."
With a bit of effort, David pulled himself away from the other side of the car and he paused to give his lower back some relief from the strain with a quiet rubbing of his knuckles.. "Hm. So, I don't know how long this will be."
"I'll wait for you in the lobby." Gerome trotted around the car swiftly. "Maybe they'll have things to look at. They made a lot of books I like."
"I don't want you to be bored." No matter the circumstance, David was still making his way to the front of the building. "You don't have to wait around."
"And make you walk, from here? That'd be mean." He matched David's purposeful stride. "You walk quickly."
"Always walk like you have somewhere to be." It had been a saying he'd kept in his mind since he was a child. "Sorry, is it too fast?"
"Please." Gerome could keep up. Being a pony had a clear advantage as it was much faster than other creatures, especially humans. "Power walk in there and tell me the good news when you're done!"
David reached for the door, but it slid open without contact being made. "Right." Automatic doors, defininately a thing. He thought about that as he walked. Most of the doors he'd run into in pony world had been very manual. That one being automatic was a symbol of power and success. "Excuse me." He went right to the reception desk, smiling at the mare there. "David Silver. They're expecting me, I hope."
The mare was busily typing away on her computer, her hooves tapping against the keys. "Hm. Hm... Here we... No... Here." She struck one last key with a smile. "They're waiting for you in 406." She raised her arm and pointed her hoof in an upward direction. "Is there anything else I can help you with?"
"No, you've been great." He fired a finger gun at her. The specifics of the gesture, lost, but his smile and attitude seemed to come across, so he went on past her towards the elevators. Elevators intended for Earth ponies were more... This ride was nothing extraordinary when compared to the other rides he had gone on in the past. Before, in the human world, he had been on the same open glass carriages that the pegasi had ridden. Architecture! It was available in a wide assortment of varieties.
It brought him smoothly to floor four and opened with a soft chime. There were a few ponies there, waiting their turn. They let David off with mildly surprised looks, then took their turn riding the elevator. "Six... Six... Six..." David chuckled to himself with memories of what so many sixes could mean. It was also just a number. "Six." There it was, 406!
He reached for the knob and twisted it, allowing him into the room. "Good day." There was a very serious pony watching him come in. There was also a frazzled pony that didn't look nearly as serious. Both were stallions. "Thanks for seeing me."
The frazzled one offered a hoof. "David, was it? Hi." He inclined his head at the serious one. "This is our lawyer."
They had lawyers?! That made sense, sorta... "Hi." He met the hoof with a fist and took a seat. The lawyer made no motion, so far. "Here it is." He put down his stack of papers with a soft thump. "But let's not get right into that or we'll get lost in the weeds."
The frazzled one rubbed behind his head. "Yeah... Been there. So, he says--" He inclined at the lawyer with his head. "That unsol--unasked for contributions can cause problems."
"Big problems," agreed the lawyer. "We would prefer to not see your submission at this time. Were our own work, past, present, or future, be found to have similarities with your work, it could cause issues."
"Sensible... But if I work for you, that stops being a problem." He pointed at himself with a thumb, turning the hand down to point at the frazzled one with a pointer finger. "So let's talk about that, if we can?"
The frazzled pony was ecstatic and clapped his hooves together in excitement. "Great! Okay. So, you... Have you worked in a team before?"
"I have." David stroked his beard. "Usually at the head, but I've worked under others too. I'm a focused writer. Give me something that needs doing and a deadline and I'm on the case."
"Great!" He waved at the lawyer. "It's alright if I see some demo work?"
"Any work you display is for demonstration purposes only. Any similarities between it and work produced here are entirely coincidental. You will not be recompensated for this. They will not credit you for any work displayed. Do you agree?" He spoke in a long, steady manner, with legal terms coming forth from him in an uninterrupted flood.
David hissed softly. "I don't have... anything to demo besides this." He tapped at the alicorn writeup. "And I don't want to give up credit rights on that just yet."
"Do you have a computer?" Frazzled inclined his head. "Do you have a phone?"
David dug out his phone. "Yes to both of those. Why?"
Frazzled produced his own. "Let's swap contacts." With a tap, that was done with a happy chime to commemorate the moment. "I'll send you a test job. Unfortunately, you will not be compensated for the task and it will not be published. But it'll see where you stand, so we know where we stand. I'm Fore Ward, two words, by the way. Nice to meet you."
David offered a hand, getting a bump from either pony. "Nice to meet you both. Um, is that it for today then?"
Fore responded with a nonchalant shrug of his shoulders. "Well! I don't know what else we can go over without the test run. We need to see how you do with an assignment. Now... I didn't want to bring this up... We respect a pony's right to be the best pony they can be, no matter what their tribe, gender, or favorite flavor of ice cream happens to be." His head flopped to the side. "But you aren't a pony."
"Sure aren't." David had seen that question as a possibility. "I'm a human, like that game, but also not quite that. A lucky coincidence, really."
"Lucky." Fore considered with a slow tapping at his chin. "Now, wild question. Way wild! You don't have any contacts with Pegasoft, do you? Didn't I see you... on an ad once?"
"Yeah." David tapped eagerly at his phone to draw up the ad to play on the table, the phone tossed out to be viewed. "I've talked with them before."
Fore sat up. "So... Just in theory here, but if we wanted to talk to them, you could be the middle-pony, right?"
"In theory?" David reclaimed his phone, not that either of the other two had been watching it too intently. "I have their marketing manager's contact."
"Wow." Fore twirled towards the lawyer. "You heard that?"
"I heard that." Flat, even. "I look forward to hearing of your performance on the test." He stood up and straightened his tie, not that it had been askew. "Have a nice day."
The lawyer left without another word, leaving David with Fore. Fore hopped to his hooves. "This has been a great meeting! Sorry we can't give something definite right now, but that could change. This isn't a no, just going down to the next floor, as it were."
"One step at a time." David reached, just to abort the motion quickly. Petting the pony he hoped would hire him? That seemed... unprofessional, really. "Looking forward to that message then. I'll get it back to you as soon as possible."
He rode the elevator down, emerging to see Gerome reading a magazine in the lobby. He strode purposefully over. "Hey."
David's arrival immediately caught Gerome's attention and he perked up. "Hi!" He hopped down to his hooves, abandoning the magazine to the couch cushion. "That was fast! Is that a good sign... or a bad sign? Wanna say now, or wait until we get some lunch?"
"Lunch sounds good." He had permission to pet that pony, so he did, ruffling Gerome's mane. "I didn't get hired, but I didn't get denied either. Work in progress."
"In progress!" Gerome led the way out to his car. "I'll drink to that. If they didn't say no, it coulda been worse." He slid into his side, ready to drive. "Let's get this parked, then we can walk where we want to go." He brought David back to the store. "Be right back." He vanished down the road at a steady puttering.
"Who's that?" Pippster was sitting in front of the store, watching where Gerome was going. "That's a friend of yours... right?"
"Yep." David crouched down closer to the colt's level. "How's it going?"
"Your new game looks neat!"
Despite Pippster's grin, David was mildly confused. "I don't have a game, yet?"
"The one you were on television for?" He pointed into the store. "That one?"
David snapped his fingers with a toss of his hand. "Right! That isn't mine. That belongs to Pegasoft. I'm just being their spokes...human." He offered his bundle of papers. "This is my game, but it isn't out yet. An imagining game."
"Oh." Pippster reached for the papers and David didn't stop him from nosing through them curiously. "I don't get the imagining game... thing... But I'm happy for you. When it's a real book, can I have one?"
"Aw..." David ruffled him on the head gently. "I'd be glad to get you one."
"No." Pippster put down the pile. "Tell me where to get it, and I'll get it."
"You don't want a free one?"
"Free's nice, but I want my friend to be happy." He beamed brightly at David. "So tell me where to get one."
David was hit by a wave of conflicting emotions, making it difficult for him to process what he was feeling. A feeling of joy, excitement and a little something else that is hard to describe. "That's so nice. Thank you. I'll do that." He reclaimed his papers. "I hope it'll be nice and pretty too. They make pretty books, so if I make one with them, it should be nice too."
"It'll be the best." Pippster went for the store, not having to go far to reach the door. "Wanna race?"
"Tempting..." He felt a buzz from his pocket. "But I should get that. It may be my potential new boss."
"Ooo! Good luck!" He dashed inside, not looking upset at being turned down.
"Thanks for understanding." Not that Pippster was there to hear it. David dug out his phone.
David,
Hi. It was a pleasure meeting you today. Although I don't believe I asked what your specialty is, that doesn't make any difference. You have to be prepared to do whatever job is necessary if you wish to work here, and unfortunately you may not have the luxury of choosing which tasks to pursue. We cannot allow ourselves to have writers who are excessively picky, as you are aware.
With that in mind, I lied. There are two assignments that you need to complete. I am looking for a detailed synopsis of a story, with the appropriate rolls for a group of four adventurers who find themselves lost and alone in the woods, miles away from any kind of safety. Secondly, I would like to observe the things that you enjoy doing and although they may be similar to my request, I still need two. Not one.
David softly hummed to himself as he read what was displayed on his phone screen. "All right, that's settled then."
"It's so nice." Gerome walked with energetic steps with David. "Getting to go out to lunch. Oh! Oh... What do humans like for lunch?"
"Bonus of being a human." David chuckled, looking over the various options as they walked. "If we can get it in our mouth, we'll consider eating it. Omnivores by trade. Ponies prefer vegetables and fruits, right?"
"Yes." Gerome bobbed quickly at that. "Um... Sorry, what are you thinking besides fruits and vegetables? Grains? Grains are good."
"Grains are good," agreed David. "Maybe I shouldn't... Fish?"
"Fish is alright," agreed Gerome back. "We're a bay town. Gonna get some fish. Not where I go first, but fish is alright. What else? Oh! Mushrooms! Technically not any of the others."
"Some mushrooms are great." And some could kill a person fairly quickly... He'd have to hope those weren't the sort ponies liked. "Alright... So, you know fish. Fish were moving things, then you made them not live, and you ate them."
Gerome cringed. "Y-yeah... That's how that works. What are you getting at, David?"
"Humans can, and have, and probably still are without me, done that to almost anything they got their hands on. On land, in the sea, in the air. You can catch it, you can eat it." David pointed at Gerome. "Eating friends and most things that can ask you not to eat it is pretty damn rude. So no Geromes on my menu."
Gerome swallowed thickly. "B-but... If you saw... Um... Wow." He listed against a sign, boneless a moment. "You really are an alien."
"Can't argue that." He reached for Gerome and, to his credit, he didn't shy, so David got to gently muss the top of the pony. "Sorry. I can't help what I am. But, omnivore. If I eat a good varied diet, even of pony food, I can live pretty well."
Gerome stepped from hoof to hoof. "I feel like I should be terrified... Ever look at a pony and think about they... might taste like?"
"I am now. It's your fault. You can't just ask if I ever imagined a purple elephant and be shocked that, yes, I am now." He ran a hand under Gerome's chin, tickling gently. "Not even kinda curious enough to want to hurt a pony. I'll take an alive pony over ten cooked ones. So, where do you want to eat? Pick a spot. I'll eat whatever. Omnivore."
"You're proud of that." Gerome smiled, some of the tension ebbing away. "Sorry for being strange about it... Okay!" He pointed across the street. "Let's get some hoagies." He led the way, energy renewed. "They have some tasty options here for anypony, or human."
David ended up selecting a salad, after all that. "This looks good."
Gerome sat at a table with David on the other end of its small surface. "No fish at least? They have some."
"Wasn't in the mood." David shrugged lightly. "But this salad looks great."
Gerome chomped his big sub. "Alright," he got out muffedly, attacking his food. "Omnivore... That's a lot you can eat. What can't you eat then?"
"Rocks?" David tapped his fingers thoughtfully together. "But some rocks are exceptions. Salt's good in moderation."
"Salt is good..." Gerome reached for the salt shaker and sprinkled the top of his hoagie. "What else?"
"Metal?" He considered that. "I take that back... I could eat metal, and so could you. If it doesn't have sharp bits, it'll pass through without doing anything. Kinda pointless. But that's a lot of things if you get down to it. Oh! Milk. Ponies are alright with milk, right?"
"Sure. Milk's alright, in moderation. Too much give you... gas." Gerome colored at that line of thought. "But it's alright. You can use it as part of other things, um..." He took a bit of his hoagie as a convenient distraction. "Forget that... Let's be adults!"
"A good thing to be." David inclined his fork before taking a fresh chomp of his salad. "What do you want to be adults about?"
"You." Gerome set his mostly-eaten hoagie on his plate. "What you like to do, besides writing and imagining games. Um... Joy wasn't wrong. I don't know a lot about you, and I really should. So tell me more."
David considered that, rubbing the back of his fingers against this beard in an idle motion. "Well, shoot. I'm an extroverted introvert. I can be quite happy by myself, working on things, but company is also nice, in moderation. I don't get recharged from group activities."
"Okay! Okay. That's good to know." Gerome wriggled in place. "I'm an introvert too... I guess... Crowds take a lot out of me. I don't get ponies who just love parties... Especially the ones that go on forever! With company I know really well, it can be fun, like the imagining games, or my work." He leaned in, looking ready to flop over the table preciously. "Tell me more, please."
"No thanks, on the eternal parties that is." David mused on that idea a moment. "I like eclectic music, often without singing in it. Give me instruments with a good mood and I'm there, and that mood can vary a lot. Varying moods is great for writing."
"Huh... Never tried that..." Gerome pulled out his phone and tapped out something quickly, working his hoof on the screen. "If you had a million bits and too much time, what would you do for fun?"
David finished his salad, even the plate fairly well cleaned in thorough devouring. "I'd start it by inspecting the tax laws around here. Depending on what I saw, maybe get a comfortable house. I'd ask Joy if she wanted to be involved in that. That's a weight off the shoulders permanently. Then--"
"W-wait." Gerome sat up, confusion in his eyes. "I meant what you'd do for fun."
"That would be very fun. I know she works hard for her bits. I'd be taking pressure off that, and myself. Double win. Sounds fun to me."
"Very adult." Gerome sipped from his straw, cradling the cup between his hooves. "But what about fun fun. Nothing that lasts past the day you do it in."
"Hm..." David pondered that for perhaps too long. "Hm..."
"Nothing?" Gerome set his cup down. "You don't like having fun?"
"Oh, no." David waved that off. "Fun is... fun... But I tend to not be the one in the front of fun. If you do something fun, drag me along."
"Well, hmmph..." Gerome considered it in kind. "What if... I wanted to take you to a water park?"
David perked. "Wow... It's been quite a while since I was at one of those. That sounds fun. Just don't be surprised when I need a break at times, but that sounds fun. Do they have waterparks here in town?"
"Sure! And even more outside the city." Gerome waved off to the wider world. "So you like water? Great! What about..." He tapped his hooves slowly. "Oh, games! You live in a game store. You like playing games?"
"I do like that," easily agreed David. "I used to have the patience to play a roleplaying game for weeks until I finished it. That's worn down a little, but I do like games."
"Ah huh, mmm..." He tapped at his phone busily. "I see..."
"What about you?" David made a twirling motion, redirecting the conversation back at Gerome. "A million bits, what do you do?"
"Oh, wow, that's a lot of bits isn't it?" He frowned, but it brightened quickly. "Wanna go on a cruise? I heard of this nice island resort that looks all kinds of fun. We can relax in the sun, play in some water, drink fancy drinks, play some games..."
David pushed back his plate and took a sip of his own drink, water. "That sounds like fun, with good company. What game would you want to play first?"
Gerome colored a brief moment. "Oh! Um... You don't want to get too physical, I guess?"
"Give me a chance for a break here and there," cautioned David. "But I'm willing to try things. Won't know if I hate it until I give it that much of a go."
David dug out his phone and soon had music issuing from it, videogame music. Pony videogame music. It was energetic and bouncing in tone. "What do you think of this?"
Gerome inclined an ear at the sounds. "Huh... I feel like I know that song... Chipper, whatever it is."
"I hear it's a classic around here." David casually went on to the next one, which was an epic ballad of some grand event. "And this one?"
"What a change!" Gerome clapped his hooves. "This is what you meant. Your music is a mood box, neat."
"Exactly." David flicked it off and away. "Want to talk about something awkward?"
"No?" Gerome inclined his head. "But I would, if you asked."
"Fair..." He reached across and gently ruffled Gerome's mane. "You can tell me to cut that out whenever." But no such request came, so the pets didn't stop. "The Big S word. That thing adult ponies do when nobody's looking and they feel like it."
Gerome attempted to show how red he could get. "Yeah?"
"I never did it." David crossed his arms. "And I have complicated feelings on the whole thing."
"Oh... Oh." Gerome rubbed his cheek softly. "Well... I'm a stallion who prefers other stallions, though I'm not against a mare that I really like, I guess?"
"Bi, homosexual preferred," countered David, distilling the idea with the skill of a modern human. "Or homosexual, bicurious? About the same thing, depending on if you ever were... Were you ever with a mare?"
Gerome sagged in place, deflating. "Once..."
"Did you like it?"
Gerome swatted at David, batting gently. "Stop! Y-yeah, it was alright... But we fell apart. You know her."
David pondered the female ponies he knew. Sunny? Unlikely. Joy? She hadn't mentioned it and it felt like she would... "Oh... Her?!"
"Her." He sank to the table in defeat. "It seemed like a good idea at the time. I was way out of my league. She's almost half my age! What was I thinking?! But we kept hanging out and I liked being with her, so it came up and we tried dating and... We figured out that doesn't work so good. So we broke it off."
David imagined that playful mare that attended their games. "Glad you two kept it civil afterwards. You two seem like real friends."
"We are! Um... I just stopped trying to romance her, and she did the same..." He flopped back in his seat. "I still wasn't sure... But I am now, I think... I..."
"Am a xenophile," completed David. "And, turns out, here's an alien to phile."
"Lewd." Gerome slide to his hooves. "Well, I barely started 'phile'ing. I want to know more about the xeno I'm thinking about. You sound like you don't know you all that much... Are you up to finding out? I'll help, if you're up for it. Maybe we'll both like it, or not... We won't know until we try."
"I just said that." David stood to join the motion. "So I'd be kinda full of it if I turned around and said no now. You're a nice pony, and I don't hate you so far... so we can see how it goes."
"Great!" Gerome looked left and right and back at David. "You're... so tall. Can you come closer?" David sank to a knee in front of him. "Great... I'm going to get closer." He reared up a little and went in to touch nose to nose, pony nose to human nose. "This is how ponies show they care for somepony. It doesn't have to be romantic, but our noses are sensitive, so letting somepony this close is a... trust thing, and it feels nice." He rubbed carefully. "Get it?"
Human noses were not quite as sensitive as a pony's, but the closeness and obvious intimacy didn't escape him. "I get it." He reached up to tickle Gerome under his snout, a thing ponies couldn't normally do. "Looking forward to learning more."
"You... look happy." Joy nodded at David as she finished closing up the shop for the day. "I like that look. Something good happen?"
"Several things." He fished out his phone. "I have a thing to do to get a job to get to making the books I want to make." He stuffed the phone away just as quickly. "I have a maybe boyfriend. And--"
"--Woah, hold your horses." That the horse was saying that to a human was an irony that she seemed to miss. "May I remind you that you made a pass at me, and another mare, at the same time? You're alright with a boyfriend? Do you... like anything?"
"I was a little out of it..." He reached back to rub at where it had been sore, before things changed. "Given youth in a lot of ways is a big shock to the system. Sorry, again, for making it strange. I don't really think about sex all that often." Which made a thought pop up. "And I have no idea how often ponies do at all." He helped in locking and shutting things since he was there. "How often do you?"
She colored at the angle of the conversation. "Well! Not... often? But that's a me thing... Ponies don't talk about that, you know, in public too often. We think about it enough, seeing as there isn't a shortage of ponies around." She headed for the stairs. "Come on, cozier seating upstairs."
He followed after her and got to cooking dinner without prompting. He had expected her to head into the livingroom, but she stayed with him as he worked. "Everything alright?"
"Yeah, just thinking... I'm proud of you, but also a little, what's the word... Wistful?"
David looked over his shoulder as the pan sizzled with the preparing food. "What about?"
"You're growing." She sat there, watching him. "You'll want to move on eventually, and that's good... They grow up so fast." She sniffed dramatically and burst into giggles. "My little human."
"Did you just make that up?" He sprinkled spices, adding to the aroma as he stirred and agitated it. "Love it." A little pony calling him a little human? Why not. "I'm not running away, or even moving out right now. You're a friend. You'd be my friend no matter what."
"Aw." She hugged a leg, something the human had a long one of, compared to her. "Glad to hear it. I'd get sad if you just cut me off... I don't have a lot of those."
"Stop saying that." He spilled the food onto two plates. "You do have friends. To start, I'm not the only one at the game."
"True... True..." She grabbed one of the plates and went to the livingroom with it. "You caused that, pesky thing. Thanks... Want to continue the movie, er, game?"
It was kind of a movie, from how he was interacting with it. "I'd love to." He sat behind her on the couch and munched his food with shovels of his fork.
"You know." She clicked the commands to make her warriors fight for their world. "This might not work out. This is... Is this your first? It's your first pony, for sure. A lot could go sideways."
"Could..." David leaned in a little, setting his finished plate aside. "But if I worried about that, I wouldn't do anything at all, and that sounds boring."
"True..." She started a summon that'd take half a minute to play properly. "Look at me... Shoot... Maybe that's half the problem." She leaned back, touching the couch with her spine. "I should take more chances..." She caught herself and broke into laughter. "What am I saying? I ended up doing wild things with you. Guess past me was listening to the good advice."
The summon ended and she resumed the battle, claiming victory. "I'm just saying... Even if you end up in it forever, or a week, I'm still here."
"I'm not vanishing, either way. Thank you, for being a great person, pony." He reached for her and she allowed him to slowly muss her mane. "Good friends are hard to find."
"Harder to keep." He slid down next to her, joining her in leaning back against the couch. "But worth the effort..." He thought back to his previous life and its lack of immediate friends he could reach out and touch. "Better than the alternative... by far."
Without saying it out loud, the two forged a promise to remain buddies, no matter what the world tossed at them. "Seriously though... a boyfriend? I had you pegged as a mare kinda stallion."
"Ponies are ponies." People were people... "I care more about what kind of person they are, on the inside. We can work around whatever the outside is. If an affectionate horror from beyond the world shows up and loves imagining games, maybe I'll learn to love tentacles."
"That's... open-minded of you." She snickered as she advanced through dialogue in the game one tap at a time, giving a chance for David to keep up with it. "Well, at least he doesn't have any tentacles. I'll give him that." She lifted the controller over her head. "Say, why don't you try a little? You've been watching me play long enough, you should get the idea."
David considered the joystick with some hesitation, but did reach for it, taking it in his hands. The joypad was made for pony hooves, meaning its buttons were kind of large, but that meant he could reach them easily enough. He continued the game, no longer just a movie for him. "Thanks..." It felt right. He was taking control of his life, even if it was a life in the world of ponies.
