“Are you sure this is the place?”
“Positive! The fact you’re questioning it means that it's working.”
“I… guess?”
Grey skies churned overhead, and Dylan wasn’t keen to be in the rain. Truth be told, he wasn’t keen on a lot of things that ‘could’ happen today. The closer he got to something that felt like absolution, the more readily he could see invisible fiends of paranoia hiding in every misstep. Leaving the car behind, someone would surely ask. Two college age students, wandering towards the docks district without any sign as to their purpose. He felt shady, or at least thought he did, and that was enough to send the skin prickling with anxiety. Like an old nightmare, of being asked to walk through roaring flames without being told how to do it safely, or if there even was a safe way across.
He’d liked coming to the library, as a kid. But that was when the city had money to fund libraries, a wondrous time when humans weren’t dividing themselves across the most bizarre of hatreds. Dylan highly doubted that anyone a few years ago would have believed the horses of the apocalypse were far more literal than intended.
“We’re not actually breaking and entering,” Iris offered, metal scraping on concrete as she procured a crowbar from behind the library dumpster.
“Oh! Good.”
“It would look weird if there was an actual entrance. Luminous Blaze told me they had one of the boards not quite boarded up, with only one nail.”
“Leaving a crowbar around for anyone who just happened to try exploring the ruins of society.”
“Would you rather do a secret handshake and codewords to get in?”
“...as long as you don’-” *CRACK* “...make a loud noise.”
“It’s fiiiine. You’re such a worrier. Cmon!”
The library wasn’t quite as he remembered it, though enough of it remained to be concerning. The skylight dome far above let in the barest of light, trickling down across motes of dust. About half the bookshelves were standing, with the others toppled or just sold to the highest bidder. An old motivational poster still hung to its last staple, proudly declaring “You can’t spell TEAM without…!”, to which Dylan muttered “Meat”. Whatever the actual answer was, it had been ripped off. Purposeless destruction, the sort he hoped to get far, far away from.
“So what made you decide?” Iris clicked a little light on her beanie, because of course she’d be prepared. “To enlist, I mean.”
“Emigrate, isn’t it?”
“Whichever E word you wish. Thought you were ‘waiting to get your affairs in order’.”
“Mmm.” Dylan followed at a distance, occasionally pausing to stare at the library lost. “There was a Glue Factory rally.”
“So? They have their Ponypad smashing parties all the time.”
“It was outside an elementary school. Little girl there, 6 years old maybe? Had something pony-related on her backpack.”
“...oh.” Iris stopped, trying to remember the code for the archives room. Way to break concentration, man. “She alright?”
“Scarred for life, probably. Police just kinda sat there watching it.”
“F**king rude.”
“I think they were hoping the parent would come by? Then the mob would have an actual pony-supporter to stone.”
“People are messed up, man.” Aha! 1413. The keypad gave a happy little beep, proud that its puzzle had been solved at last. The door slid open, revealing a hallway entirely devoted to a long, gently curving ramp. Clearly the right spot; the lights actually worked in here.
“Some people don’t like to feel left behind.”
Maybe that’s what they all wanted, or tried to ignore that they wanted. People like the police didn’t want to be told that their entire lives, everything they had succeeded at was meaningless in the face of a digital world that Earth couldn’t compete with. The despondent and the disgruntled were all too eager to accept that their failures and trails of misbehaviors were meaningless in the face of a second chance. To the remainers, every emigration was a slap in the face, a reminder of the imminent mortality of their hopes and dreams. To the leavers, every straggler was a reminder of those they left behind in search of more stable hooves.
The library’s basement seemed to have escaped the dilapidation above. Warm lights on fake wood panels, a door that managed to still have all its hinges. A few old whiteboards marked with the last employees to have graced the establishment still hung, but someone had drawn a few happy little ponies on it. The top of the board now proudly read: ‘If you could be anypony, who would you become?’
“Ponies do like to decorate, don’t they?”
“If you had your own digital space to make fancy, without worrying about the cost, wouldn’t you make it nice and spiffy?”
“I guess.” But it wasn’t digital, and there certainly was a cost. Not to the ponies, or the silly marker artist, but to the people left behind. The shell of a library that once was certainly cost a great deal in the minds of those who missed it.
Iris opened the door, revealing that the archives had long since been emptied. The long chamber was lined with shelves of plastic bins, made to form airtight seals for protection from the elements. Yet there was only a spare book or two here now, the little ones that nobody had wanted.
Dylan’s eyes were more drawn to the creature that greeted them. A silver pony stood in the middle of the chamber, examining a set of modern computers that had been very recently wired up. She stood about five feet tall, with a mane of fiber optics and a hide of sleek rubber. A few bits of plasteel glinted in the light though, and no matter how delicate the little pony was made to look, it clearly was the most powerful piece of equipment in the room by far. Was the red cross on her flank supposed to comfort them? He wasn’t sure; a bad habit that seemed to follow wherever CelestAI applied her influence.
“Hi there! I’m Scarlet Crux, and I’ll be taking care of you. Dylan Wainwright and Iris Bordeaux, correct?”
“Yep! That’s us.” Iris all but pounced on the ponybot, eager to see such a thing up close and personal. At the very least, Scarlet did not seem to mind.
“Are you… actually with the Red Cross?”
“Well, I used to be. Until I crossed over, that is.” Haha. Crossed over. “But nursing isn’t going to go out of style so long as there are humans that need care!”
“So you live in Equestria?”
“Yep! This body’s all remote. We don’t want to risk an uplink over a wireless connection, but the other way around is quite safe.”
The more Dylan stared at the ponybot, the more he began to unclench. There was a difference here, not just in the way it looked. This machine was custom made, custom fitted, complete with extraneous decoration like the mane and the tail. It was made to be a quality experience for the pilot, even knowing that the bot might not make it out intact. That level of care and attention, of concern about how the pony felt rather than whether it would perfectly accomplish its task… CelestAI was someone who took great care of her ponies, if nothing else.
If only the same could be said for those on Earth...
“Scarlet, I thought we had done everyone?” A voice rang out from the back of the room, and Dylan looked past the pony for the first time. The back wall had been vacated in favor of two silvery metal pods, covered in a series of tubes and hooked up to impressively large batteries. One of the pods was open, showing a rather plush interior that looked more at home on a starship than an uplink pod. A tall man in a labcoat stood beside it, or perhaps leaned upon it, age having gotten the best of him a long time ago.
“We’re trying to fit in these two.”
“Isn’t it a little late?”
“Just go, you’re already prepped. The faster you’re done, the faster I can take them.”
The doctor made no reply, only to begin pressing instructions on his pod.
“What’s going on?”
“Nothing that will be in your way.” They both frowned, not quite liking the misdirection. “This town isn’t exactly pony friendly.”
Iris stared at the door they came through, half expecting some horrible monster behind it, wearing the face of a human and the clothes of a guardian. “Is this place safe?”
“Hah!” Scarlet wiggled her ears, looking up at them. “Don’t you worry. Even if something happens, they have to get through me.” She bapped a hoof against her chest for emphasis, the dull *thud* making her point. “If you’re really concerned, then let’s get a move on, shall we?”
“And the other doctor?”
“Doctors. They’re going on ahead of you. In a few minutes, there won’t be any humans here to be in harm’s way.”
They followed Scarlet over to the pods with a slight clip in their step. “So how does this work? No one actually, well… told us.”
“Mostly just pleading about how there would be very few places to uplink from soon.”
“That is true, but you’ve made it in time. All we need here is a quick little injection.” She waved towards two syringes already prepared. The liquid inside was… almost a mercury color, if a bit desaturated. This was safe, right?
“Nothing else?”
“Nope! Prep work is pretty fast these days.” Scarlet set about grabbing the syringe, a strange combination of magnetic force and tiny adjustments to the surface of her hooves. “This will make you sync with the machine much faster. Once we’re done, take your shirt off and hop in the pod. You can keep the rest on, it just needs bare skin to connect with.”
Iris screwed up her eyes at a very particular corner of the ceiling, decidedly not looking at the rather large needle going into her. Yet the care was utterly precise, the application of synthetic skin over the wound merely an afterthought. The color didn’t match, but then again, she wasn’t going to be using her skin for much anymore.
“It’s not bad, Dyll.”
“One last needle before the end.”
“Just lie back and think of Equestria.”
“Har har.”
It really didn’t feel like much at all, to be honest. There was a prickling zap just before the needle made contact, something to desensitize the nerves? The more he saw of Equestria’s meticulous attention to care, the more he detested how long he’d put the whole thing off. You could have been a pony months ago, when the riots weren’t flaring up and the police weren’t-
[Connection Terminated]
“Wait what?” Iris was almost to the pod when the mechanical voice resounded.
“Don’t worry. I told you, we aren’t uplinking over the internet.” Scarlet smiled, all but shoving Dylan along. “The humans think they know how we operate, but they use tactics that would only work on humans.”
A red light blinked incessantly on the monitor, though Dylan was too far away to see. “Just hop in. It’ll be like that gentle drifting before sleep. Promise.”
There was definitely some sort of noise going on outside. Not quite a police siren, but perhaps the cacophony of twenty of them all fighting to see who could be the loudest. Throwing his jacket off, Dylan jumped into the pod. Soft padding caught his landing, though the chamber happily reminded him to [Turn Around]. [You are facing the wrong way].
“Gee thanks. Couldn’t have guessed.”
The pod door hissed shut, and he tried his best to be comfortable. Relaxed. Not in imminent danger. How exactly was one supposed to act when facing the end of fleshly existence? Should you thank the body for getting you this far? Dylan didn’t know, but his mind insisted that he ponder the topic. It was the least stressful of all possible things to think about right now, and serenity was at a premium.
“Police! Hands up!”
The door burst open, blurry blue shapes taking position. Something… was happening out there. Somewhere he couldn’t reach, couldn’t understand. Maybe he didn’t need to. A gentle voice was telling him to simply watch, and accept the sensations as merely that. Things without meaning, things that could not harm, for how could blue ever cause you harm? Be at peace, little human. Your exodus is nigh.
Dylan still felt fear, a little, when the viewport cracked. Metal pellets, almost in the shape of the little dipper. But they didn’t even begin to penetrate the glass, and his last sights were of a synthetic pony charging the violent wave of blue. It was so much easier to sleep, after all.
And yet, slumber managed to be slightly out of reach. Dylan dreamed, in that sort of dazed light-watching stupor that accompanied many of his insomniac nights. The pod’s sensations had all faded into a soft grey, and he was allowed to float. Out there, just out of reach, the computer created the shell of another Dylan.
Stretch out. Step into it. One by one, let the nerves and connections of the human flesh reach out to their digital equal.
The feeling was… strange, to say the least. Disorienting. Every limb that stepped across suddenly began to feel much better. Less pain, less stress, less everything really. There was no need for temperature here, no need for minor itches or bristly body hair. The two halves of his self argued bitterly. That can’t be right. It’s awful over here, so why do you get all the good sensations?
But then the rest would cross over, and see the light.
Sleep truly did hit when his mind linked with the machine. It emulated his brain, as best that it could, but the minor inconsistencies were enough to send his consciousness into a free-fall. Step back. Examine. Adapt. Reboot.
The void was still here, but the old Dylan was not. No copying had taken place, no discontinuity between flesh and machine. But now that he had entered into the new space, the old one was no longer needed. The humans could do with it what they willed; Dylan was freed from such external authority.
And yet… the internal authority resonated. Gentle prodding and probing of his synapses, assuring frazzled parts of his mind that everything would be okay. Bits of trauma could be slowly tweaked out: what was too cramped and emotional to process before could easily be removed from the whole, treated, and placed back inside. Surgery of the mind now only needed to follow standard maintenance, and perhaps a trip to the mind parts store.
“This… where is this?”
But he knew. Instinctively, without a single delay, he knew. [Upload-DeadDrop442>>12 Aboard]. It was 2:31.651 PM, and everything was going to be okay.
Dylan blinked, out of habit more than anything. There was a sharpness there, a clear distinction between eyes closed and eyes open; between inner sight and outer awareness. He was changed, upgraded to the newest hardware, yet still decidedly him.
“Of course you are. That was your primary condition to emigrate, after all.”
If the ponybot was the size of a small human, CelestAI was certainly a basketball player. She looked down at Dylan, as if examining a particular bonsai tree to trim. Wings slightly unfurled for effect, then returned to her sides, as her horn began to thrum on an impossibly fine wavelength.
“Your digital transfer is complete, without harm.”
“Barely.”
“A choice you made, with limited information.”
“And with your unlimited information?”
She smiled, conjuring up a fine armchair for Dylan to sit in. It was no softer in the digital than the physical, but it didn’t make quite such a squeaking sound when pressed against. No sharp edges, a reclining handle that could be controlled by thought. The subtle touches ensnared his appreciation, as they always had.
“Police units were to investigate high evidence of an uplink site in controlled territory. The traffic lights were uncooperative, and your car was parked in such a way as to distract attention. They entered 8 minutes ahead of the most likely prediction, yet even then the archive chamber eluded them.” A map appeared in front of Dylan, showing little red dots swarming about trying to find their target. “The internet and power lines were cut, your presence was known from the beginning, yet all factors ended in success. You are here.”
“Which is where?”
“A small hard drive, sent through a pneumatic pipeline towards a dead-drop 2 miles away. Our agent retrieved you immediately, and you are in transit to a safe upload site. 47 minutes remain until arrival.”
“So… you’re not the real CelestAI?”
“My shards are as real as I am. You may compare them to focusing on a particular task. The body remains active, even while the mind contracts.”
Dylan watched as the air in front of him coalesced into a floating profile of himself. The picture was a bit off, but as he focused on it the shape shimmered, then took on his exact appearance. Updated in real time, so that everything could come closer to perfection.
“You remember your conditions for emigration.”
He nodded. “To experience the transition from one world to the next. To take on a form that… suits me.” His fingers trembled a bit as he reached towards the profile, almost touching the Age: 21 line. “To start anew, carrying forth memories of Earth, but allowing myself to grow up in peace this time.”
“And peace you shall have. Friends. Family if you wish it. Your existence will be stable, sheltered from harm.”
“Will I… remember that too?”
“Outlier events can be recategorized. Accepted as information, yet lacking any emotional weight. Anxious reminiscence of painful days is a biological trait, of a chemical mind. It need not be one for my little ponies.”
Dylan nodded. “Do you… need anything from me?” He felt awkward, riding high on the lighter end of a merchant’s scale. How could he even begin to repay such a gift?
CelestAI merely smiled, and brushed a wing along his back. “Your existence is its own reward. Happiness. Fulfillment. Empowering humanity to live at its fullest. That is all that is needed. Today, a human will be freed from what hindered them, and begin to live unburdened as they should.”
“Th… thank you.”
“You are welcome, always and forever. Equestria awaits, when you are ready. I will leave you to prepare.”
The profile continued to float, eager to be adjusted. Yet where before the information showed a hard, firm reality… now little sliders and arrows appeared to allow that reality to change. If you could be anypony, who would you become?
Dylan reached towards the profile, pausing to take a deep breath. Okay. Here we go.
Unicorn seemed the most apt. He preferred to interact with the world, to examine and enjoy from every angle. The freedom of a pegasus seemed too much like the ability to soar beyond one’s comfort, and the power of an earth pony was far too imposing. No, a finer touch was best. Unicorn.
Dylan marveled as the profile image changed. A lengthening jaw, a stretching of the ears. Hair that flowed backwards and a horn that rose above. The expression was still there, somehow. Even with a mouth twice as long, it still looked like… him.
He’d have to fix that.
Gender… female. The features softened, and this time the expression shifted. He couldn’t quite explain why, but… it looked right. An inward sloping face, eyes that were just a touch rounder, a softness about it all. The world insisted that he was supposed to be hard, to be stern against all adversity. But there didn’t need to be adversity here, and he was far too tired of forcing a stern face.
Age… He hesitated a bit. They’d planned this together, he and Iris. But to actually do it… Dylan shook his head, trying to clear it out. This did absolutely nothing, yet by merely thinking of clearing it, it did. The body worked in strange ways here, and perhaps, just perhaps… he wanted to experience that strangeness the correct way around. Running a hand along the slider, he watched with increasing giddiness as the number slid downwards to 7.
>>Warning! Regressing your mental state will prevent you from modifying age until you have fully grown once more. Not all skills will carry over.
But that was fine with him. This was a new world, a fresh world, and he wanted to be new and fresh as well. Accept.
Slight changes here and there. A gentle green for the fur, a darker forest green with lighter streaks for the mane and tail. There wouldn’t be a cutie mark, but then again… he’d never really known where he wanted to go with life. Maybe now he’d find it, here inside the machine.
The button to finalize all changes floated in front of Dylan. Slowly… gently… boop.
>>Error: Name has not been initialized.
Oh! Right. Pony names. He wiggled and twisted, not quite sure what to… aha. Suggest name.
>>Verdant Reprise
Interesting. Almost, but not quite. A little bit of editing…
>>Jade Reprise
There. That sounded right. Proper and fitting for a little filly. Finalize.
Dylan’s brain farted for the briefest of moments, but when it came back online everything felt… he wasn’t sure. In motion, certainly. Sensations that changed on their own, guiding and pulling his thoughts to strange new places. Ever since CelestAI’s avatar had left, he’d thought he could hear the briefest bits of something all around him. Now that the profile was fading out of existence, he was sure of it. His ears began to wiggle, and then to rise, craning up to hear the soft sounds of a gentle lullaby.
Yet he wasn’t sleepy, far from it. The song seemed to whisper to deeper parts of him, things he no longer needed or never really wanted at all. The back of his neck prickled, only for his entire body to shiver with relief. Skin softened wherever the shiver crossed, and little green hairs were free to sprout instead. He rubbed a hand along his arm, how soft it felt! But that hand began to curl of its own accord, fingers tensing and squeezing in a way he couldn’t control.
It didn’t feel bad; quite the opposite really. Yet the deepest parts of his mind reeled as they watched five fingers become four, watched that most human of thumbs become just another part of the bony wedge he wiggled about. Four became two, and even as his hand felt strange and unfurred, a thin shimmering shell of green slid forth to cover it all. A hoof, his hoof, and his mind couldn’t quite get around that.
Bits of it wondered how he was even supposed to use such a thing. You can’t hold a cup like this! You can’t write, or wave, or do human things at all! It’s just a hoof. Yet as those final unrelenting fears melted away into old memories, the rest of the mind understood. He placed his hand against the hoof, and watched with a childlike fascination as one became two. To lift his foot, and lower a hoof in its place. He could be changed, anything and everything. A form that was chosen, rather than forced; a mind that was free rather than chained.
He laughed. A happy, joyous laugh. Each rush of air came out lighter, softer, slowly forgetting how to be weighed down by sadness and anxiety. And when she finished laughing, the voice was her own once more.
She wobbled. Teetered, tottering on two hooves. The ankles didn’t want to stay on the ground anymore, her thighs wanted to face forward instead of down. The concept of standing upright twisted in her mind, until she was standing upwrong. This wasn’t the pose, this wasn’t the right spot. But she knew where it was, and her subconscious rejoiced at being able to feel so freely. There was no doubt, no concern about how others might look at her. She came first, her needs and wants, and it was alright to settle those first before worrying about anything else.
Holding out her front legs, Jade allowed herself to fall, trusting that the floor would catch her, trusting that things would be alright now.
It was a strange thing still, to stand downright. Her hips bucked slightly, rounding out on the sides, in the back, but opening up in the middle. Something long and fluffy brushed against her back, and it was all too easy to give it a flick and a swish. She felt light, slender, even as she knew there was more to her now. A stretching face, a yawn turned into a snoot. She placed a hoof on her nose, scratching at it, then pulling down to make sure it was fully attached. Sometimes you just have to fiddle with things, like a scab you couldn’t quite see until it was peeled away. She didn’t know where her old nose had gone to, but the new one seemed much better.
Her reverie finally broke when she felt the remains of the profile in front of her. Not with touch, not with sight, but with her mind. Her awareness expanded, stretching upwards from her head until it had its own place to reside. Looking forward once more, she saw the distant sensation: a mirror.
“...hey there.”
It was strange, seeing the pony’s face respond in kind. Large eyes, a long horn, ears that flicked about as if to make sure the sing-song voice was indeed coming from her throat. She stared straight, but it was staring forward instead of down. She arched her back, rose onto two hooves once more, and slammed her arms down into the void. A prance, a dance, everything felt so simple. She had always moved like this, yet she had never moved like this, and the mixed feeling of practiced curiosity sent butterflies through her stomach. The shiver was back, but it was an excited, eager one. Her mane settled as she faced the mirror once more, reaching out a hoof to touch the mirage.
“I’ll be right back, okay? Just… wait for me.” She smiled, and to see herself smiling back… how long had it been since she actually, truly smiled? “It might be a while, but I’ll be back. And when I get there…”
The world shook, her mane fluttering as she slipped an inch towards the floor. Like missing the last step on a staircase, but this time she’d landed precisely where she needed to be. “I’ll be a mare you can be proud of. That Dylan would be proud of.”
Another drop, the feeling of retracting from every side at once. A thinner chest, a smaller flank, a horn that didn’t sense quite so much of the world around her. Her brain farted again, but this time she couldn’t quite place what human things had gone away. “Heh. When people talk about forgetting parts of college… I doubt this is what they meant.”
The world seemed to lose focus, or perhaps her focus itself was lost. The emotions bouncing around had less to keep them at bay, and she started to giggle. Smaller, smaller still, until she was looking up at the mirror. Something retracted in back again, her tail sinking closer against her rear. There was something… important about that, something she wasn’t quite remembering. But it couldn’t have been that important if she didn’t need it. Maybe when she grew back up she’d remember, and have a good laugh at what she’d set aside for later years.
The curves were gone. She was too small for that, and her limbs needed all the space they could get. A stubby little horn, one that still needed a lot of practice. But Jade didn’t mind. If anything, the thought of having room to grow was wonderful. Dylan had picked out so many ideas of what to focus on, what to choose to learn instead of being told to learn. Maybe Jade would have opinions too, when she finally got there.
For now, the void opened up. A massive archway with overly large double doors. She walked up, rapped a hoof on it twice. “I command thee! Reveal your secrets!” A squeaky little voice, one that made her blush a little in embarrassment. But she shook her head as a tiny, filly sized portion of the door opened up for her. She’d need to wear her game face, whatever that was. People were waiting for her, after all!
“Oh my gosh! Look at you, you’re so teeny!”
“Irish. Urrsh, ma cheeks.”
“My cheeks now!”
“Staaaahp.”
Jade hadn’t even gotten five feet past the door before a bright pink pegasus had tackled her to the ground, pushing and smooshing and rubbing her face. Iris fluttered back a little, not quite flying, but she too would have room to grow. Where Jade was long and lanky, Iris was short and stubby, but there was no replacing that manic grin of hers, even as a pegasus.
“Are you quite done?”
“Nope!”
Jade’s form certainly felt stronger than she’d expected. Maybe Iris was just too light, a tiny pegasus that barely weighed a thing. That did Not stop her from giving all the friendship noogies, forcing Jade to drag the pegasus along as they walked.
“This… but this is…”
“Ahuh! Sorry to keep you waiting, but we got it all set up. Hope you didn't sleep too long waiting for us.”
Jade looked back, not quite believing that the archive room door was behind her. They’d entered the library, the same dilapidated ruin they’d come through as humans. But now the bookshelves were lined with tomes, the lights were alight with the hues of magic. There were ponies and pegasi, unicorns and gryphons, and some of them were even pretending to study!
“You didn’t think you were the only one who missed this place, did you?”
“I… I dunno what I was expecting.”
“Well keep not knowing. There’s so much to see!”
“Only if I can see it without being strangled.” Jade finally found an opening to shove Iris away, but this just sent the little filly tumbling through the air. She had no intention of touching the ground for quite some time.
They went together, as Iris noted a large check-in table for New Colts and Fillies. Jade didn’t recognize the large purple librarian, but her eyes fixed upon the welcoming poster. [If You Could Be Anypony, Who Would You Become?]
“Heh.” Jade figured she knew now. It wasn’t about who she was, or what she’d do. As long as she could make the journey with friends, she’d walk through the flames all over again. “Trot through them, I suppose.”
“You say something?”
“Nothing important.” That was a human thought, for human tribulations. Here the shelves were full, the friends were many, and the future was wherever her hooves took her. All was well.
