> Leave a Light On > by AuroraDawn > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- > If You've Lost Your Way > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- There was a knocking at the door, and it was the timid, unsure nature of the sound that had immediately woken Applejack. Had it been a heavy pounding or an urgent rapping, she would have slowly opened her eyes and sighed deeply before crawling out from under her covers. But it was quiet, low enough that any other sleeping pony would have had no idea it was there. Years ago it wouldn’t have even gotten so much as a snore out of Applejack. Life has a way of changing ponies, though. There came a second set of knocks, just as light as before but seasoned with a slight increase in frequency, and Applejack had to hold herself back from racing down the stairs and waking everyone else up. She made it to the door as soon as she could, and right as a third knock began, she pulled it open. Immediately the scene she had resigned herself to expecting appeared before her. Two ponies were outside her door; one with red, wet eyes and a quivering muzzle, the other unconscious and stiff. The first was that cellist earth pony, Applejack realized. What was her name again? Octavia, that was it. The other was her marefriend, that white unicorn that lived with her and was the largest source of noise complaints in the town.  Octavia was crying, trying to speak through panic and fear. Applejack said nothing, letting the pony get out what she needed to say. “I’m dreadfully sorry, I know it’s so late, my friend, she’s… well, it’s been, and… I know I should probably take her to the hospital but when I started bringing her there she got mad and started yelling, and I don’t want anypony to see her like this, and… I don’t know what to do, I need…” She stopped, closed her eyes, and took a deep breath while squeezing Vinyl closer to herself. “Your porch light was on, and it was the only one I could see. Can you help?” Applejack walked out the door, muttering nothing more than a silent “mmhmm” while she ducked under Vinyl’s other leg, easing Octavia’s burden. They passed through the doorway and into the foyer, and Applejack spoke again. “Just over to this room here, onto the couch. Do you know what’s wrong with ’er?” “I, uhm, well, I came home from a concert tonight and she was stumbling and slurring, her legs didn’t seem to move right. I- well, I might have gotten mad at her. She’s been getting worse and worse these last few months…” Octavia and Applejack gently set Vinyl down on the couch, where the unicorn twisted and shifted with strange, jerky movements. She mumbled something, and then there was a long, drawn out moment where she didn’t breath. Octavia let out a little worried cry and brought her hooves to her mouth, watching alongside Applejack who had started to move towards the unicorn. When at last Vinyl rasped in a hoarse breath and her chest started rising and falling again, Octavia sighed, and Applejack saw a shudder of slight relief run through her. “We, uh… we fought,” Octavia continued.  “She stormed into our room, and then she was quiet. I felt bad, and after an hour I went to apologize, but she wasn’t responding. When I went in I found her just like this, drifting in and out, not breathing right, and I… well, I, I’m—” “It ain’t your fault, hon. She’s gone and done it to herself, nothing you can be blamed for.” “But I—” “I ain’t saying nothing about her choices in life. I’m here ta help, but I’ll need your help too, and we’d best get the guilt out of the way.” “... Okay. Thank you, Applejack.” Applejack wandered off to a cupboard in the corner of the living room and came back with a stained and patchy woolen blanket which she draped over Vinyl. She then put a hoof around Octavia’s withers and gently guided her away from the couch to a chair closer to the fireplace. Octavia let herself be pulled away, never pulling her gaze away from her marefriend. With a flick of her head Applejack lit a match and spat it onto the coals in the fireplace. A few quick puffs of air from her were enough for the kindling already set up to catch, and a minute later there was a small crackling fire. Satisfied, Applejack walked over to the rocking chair opposite Octavia, and then sat. “Still never got what it was outta ya,” she said.  “Uh… She’s had bad anxiety, and it’s gotten worse as she’s gotten more well-known. She was drinking to cope, but it became a real problem for her. To try and cut back on the alcohol she saw a doctor and got a prescription.” Applejack grunted. “I take it it wasn’t for any herbal tea and quiet music.” “No.” Octavia sighed, shaking her head. “I don’t know what it was called. They’re little white dusty things, rectangular. So do you know what to do?” One of Vinyl’s eyes opened, and she furtively tried to fight off the light blanket on top of her. There was a moment of slurred curses and mumblings, before she gave up, gasped another breath, and drifted away again. “Just the pills?” Applejack asked, her tone clearly indicating she already knew Octavia’s answer. “She didn’t drink as often as before, but she didn’t stop,” Octavia replied. “That hurts to say aloud,” she muttered, dropping her head. “I hate seeing her like this, what’s become of her. I love her dearly, Applejack. I don’t want her to suffer like this.” She sniffed, and there was another dreadful minute of absolute silence while Vinyl struggled to breath. “You won’t tell anypony you’ve seen her like this?” Applejack rubbed her muzzle, thinking. “I ain’t gonna say I’ll never tell a soul. I won’t go blabberin’ about town how I seen her tonight o’course, but this girl needs a doctor. Mixing pills and booze ain’t something I’m prepared to cure.” “I know I need to get her to a hospital, I just… Vinyl always mentioned how so many of her idols were exposed as addicts, and how fast everypony turned against them. I don’t… I don’t want to be the pony that does that to her.” Applejack nodded, turning to Octavia to find the earth pony was still staring at the ground, crying. “Tea?” “Please.” The next hour passed painfully slow for both of them. Applejack had set up a kettle over the small fire, and the moment it started to whistle she pulled it off and poured them both a cup. Neither of them spoke while they drank and watched Vinyl shiver and grumble meaningless, soupy words, and when the cups had been drained and gone cold, Applejack stood up and repeated the process. Eventually, Octavia broke the silence. “I must thank you for helping her— us. Helping us. I know we’re not close friends. I wouldn’t have blamed you if you just told us to go straight to the hospital.” “Well, I am still tellin’ you to get to the hospital, but I know sometimes that can feel like the wrong option. I won’t let judgement live under this roof. You’re free to take all the time here you need, though when the sun rises and the family gets up, be prepared for Apple Bloom to be curious.” “Right. Of course.” “It’s probably best we wait until Big Mac gets up, actually. He can help you get Vinyl here to the ER, her objections be damned. He can carry her in one of the apple carts, keepin’ her from view. No scandals for ya.” “That would be lovely. Thank you. I still don’t… well, I mean to say, I’m still very grateful you’re helping. You didn’t have to, and I genuinely appreciate it.” Applejack’s eyes went cold, staring hard off into the distance. Octavia noticed this change and recoiled in her chair.  “Did I say something wrong?” Applejack shook her head and blinked, coming back to reality. “Nah, you’re fine, sugar. Well, you are wrong about something. I do need to help. Everyone here in Ponyville are my friends, in some form or ’nother. So long as I can help it, I won’t lose another friend to drugs. She might need medical attention that I can’t give, but the last thing she needs is no attention. And that, that I can help with.” Her lip was trembling, and she looked away from Vinyl, staring at the wall under the staircase that was lined with faded photographs and paintings. Octavia opened her mouth to speak, but closed it soon after, opting instead to set her cup down and stand up from her seat. She crossed the living room quietly and tapped Applejack on the shoulder, startling her. With a weak smile Octavia reached her forelegs out, offering a hug, which Applejack quickly accepted. This time, it was the farmer’s turn to sniffle. “Somepony close?” Octavia asked, patting Applejack’s back. “Somepony I shoulda been closer to.” They broke, and Octavia sat down on the floor next to Applejack’s seat. “I knew they were getting inta things they ought not to. I looked down on them, rolled my eyes, wondering why they couldn’t just work hard and face their issues head on like I did.” Vinyl moaned and rolled over, squeezing the blankets close to herself. The gaps between her fits of apnea had started to widen, and Octavia managed a small smile. “One night, there came a knock at the door,” Applejack continued, speaking more to herself than Octavia. “Quiet thing, hardly noticeable. I was shocked I even woke up to it. But I ignored it. Figured if it were urgent they’d start poundin’ and hollerin’, and then I rolled over and went back to sleep.” She dropped her head and exhaled slow. It felt like she was breathing out molasses. “Found out a few days later that they had overdosed. Found under the bridge outside of town, curled up in the fetal position. Scared and alone,” Applejack choked, holding back her own tears. “Oh, Applejack, I’m so sorry.” “It- it weren’t my fault. I know. Like I told ya, we can’t be blamed for the choices others make. But I coulda helped. I coulda opened that door and brought them in and let them stay warm and know that I was here for ‘em, and maybe if they had known I loved them they’d be more willing to get the proper help they needed.” The sun started to peek through the kitchen windows, and a stray ray found itself on Vinyl’s forehead, causing her to groan and wrap her forehooves around her eyes. Octavia couldn’t help herself, and she giggled quietly, prompting the corner of Applejack’s mouth to curve up in the start of a smile. “Well, since then, I leave that porch light on every night, and always answer that door. No matter who it is or what they want.” There were a couple thumps from the floor above, and Applejack shook her head.  “That’s well and enough about me, though. Come on now, hon, let’s get Vinyl into one of the carts in the barn. I’ll explain it all to Big Mac once he’s down, and he’ll take you two to the hospital.”