Algebraic Inequality

by ChibiMango

First published

When an infant Starlight Glimmer appears in the Battle For Dream Island universe, it's up to the hosts of BFB to care for her!

After an EXIT escape attempt, the loss of half of their contestants, and the loss of their co-host, Four is horribly stressed out, even if they try hard not show it. When a helpless little heliotrope unicorn filly appears and needs a caretaker, it's just the cherry on top of the whole mess. What's a number meant to do?

Ah well, at least she's pretty cute.

Crossover with Battle for Dream Island. Begins at the end of BFB 16. Inspired by Tatsurou's PWNY-Verse.

Chapter 1: A Glimmer of Joy (BFB 16)

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"Then, because we can't have two competitions in the same place, Four's crew? You're gonna have to go."

Those were the last words Two said before they pressed the button. God, Four hated that smug little look they flashed. They wanted to just zap that green digit right in their stupid lidded gaze. But as soon as that button was pressed, Four could feel themself slipping away, and let out a scream. Their senses became muddled as the burnt gray wasteland began to fade away, but they could hear their contestants shriek in unison with them.

Then, as soon as it finished fading to black, everything popped back into existence. Or rather, they popped back into existence, in a completely different location. It was a green and purple land of cliffs and plateaus, with a pinkish sky, and various ruins strewn about. Their contestants had appeared there as well, at least that hadn't been messed up.
Considering their luck today, Four had half-expected the objects to be separated from them as well.

Satisfied that things weren't getting even worse, Four went into their signature resting face, an empty stare, with no sign of mental gears turning. At least, that's what their expression would lead an outsider to believe. Four's mind was actually very busy processing everything that had gone on today.

'Well today's probably the cruddiest day I've ever had. Ever.' they internally deadpanned. 'The EXITors nearly succeeded at an escape attempt, some sleazy jerk I barely remember beats me up, and then most of my contestants leave me for them, just because they're some kind of smooth talking charmer. These things could have happened any time, but they all just had to happen on the exact same day together.'

'At least it seems like things aren't gonna get any worse.' they added after their little rant.

A wave of despair rolled over them, but they kept it locked behind their poker face. Then they heard footsteps, and while the rest of their body remained stationary, their gaze slightly shifted to see Taco approaching. She seemed concerned, an eyebrow curving inwards.

'Well, I have to be positive, for the show! It won't do to have a mopey host!' Four insisted in their head. They stood up a bit more, and prepared for Taco's dialogue.

"We just lost over half our contestants Four!" Taco began, gesturing with her hands. "Is the show gonna be okay?"

"Taco, what are you talking about? We just advanced to the Final Fourteen of BFB!!" they cheered, in a highly convincing faux-joy. Taco seemed to fall for it, her face full of awe. But then in the distance, crying could be heard.

Four's expression soured at this. "Hey! This is a thing to celebrate, guys! There will be NO tears over our progress!" they whined, waving their hands.

Taco looked behind her to see Leafy and Ruby climbing over a ledge. "Uh, that wasn't any of us, Four," Ruby said with a puzzled tone as she descended.

"It was coming from lower down, and I'm gonna help them!" Leafy declared when she hopped down. "Uh, whoever it was!" she added with confusion.

"Oh. Well it's my duty as host to know what's going on, so I'll zoop on down!" Four answered. Leafy blinked at this, and when she opened her eyes, Four was much lower down on the plateaus. At the bottom, in fact.

Four was perplexed to see a little pinkish-purple creature at the bottom. It was small, with hooves and a horn on it's head. It's little mane was purple with pale minty streaks. It's muzzle had a fussy frown on it, but it's crying slowed to sniffling when Four approached.

"Mh? Who's baby is this!? It looks like one of those horse things!" they said, leaning towards the infant with their eyebrows scrunched.

"Wait, what?" Leafy asked as she squinted up above, trying to make out the details from a distance.

"Come see for yourself!" Four honked in their usual nasal tone. They snapped their fingers, and Leafy, Ruby, and Taco were suddenly on the ground next to them.

Ruby saw the horn and her eyes widened, then she jumped up in the air with a gasp. "A UNICORN!!!" she squealed.

Taco had to grab her by the corner to keep her from launching herself into the foal, which was becoming overwhelmed again already by the crystalline object. "Hold up Ruby, you'll spook it," she stated. But then she looked over at the little one.
"I thought horses weren't native to Goiky? And... that unicorns didn't exist?" she asked.

"Same here," said Leafy, scratching the back of her head with a black limb.

"Who cares? It's so pretty!" Ruby gushed, relaxing a bit in Taco's grasp. Taco kept her grip stable and sturdy just to be safe.

Four picked up the foal, and held it upside down. It quickly began to wail again, and they panicked. "Wait, don't cry! Was I holding you wrong? Here!" they stammered. They swooped the little pony into a cradled position, and though there were tears in it's eyes, it stopped bawling. They both just stayed like that for a moment, staring into each other's eyes as Four awkwardly began to rock it back and forth, though it was more of a weird little swinging motion. They obviously weren't prepared for situations like this, but they were trying their best.

"Uh, Four? I know we got interrupted, but the episode is still going," Leafy said, snapping both number and equine out of their moment. Four widened their eyes and began to stammer out a response.

"O-Oh, right!" they then put on their game face in response to the situation, and turned towards the viewers. "We'll figure this out next time. See you in BFB 17!" they said with a smirk. The little filly in their arms, almost completely soothed now, suddenly sneezed, which made them briefly lose their composure before straightening themself again.

Then the episode ended there.