> Midnight Reviews
>  by Nekiyha
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

> Istallion Indulgences
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

Midnight stepped through the door into a quiet restaurant. Swallowing dryly, trying to stamp down her nerves, as she looked about. This was her first big job, after months and months of work critiquing small diners and cafes, she finally got an invitation to review one of the fanciest spots in town. A fancy, high roller, Istallion restaurant in the east end of town. Catering to the wealthy ponies, as well as those looking to treat themselves every so often.

Midnight was a bat pony, with light grey fur with white freckles along her face and plot, and white socks on all four legs. She had dark purple mane and tail, her mane cropped short and her tail left to grow long. 

Unlike most of her race, however, Midnight was rather chubby. Her choice of career had let stubborn pounds onto her frame, making her stomach hang low and her plot thicken. Her stomach hung to her knees, with a soft pigeon chest, and a wide barrel where her wings could comfortably rest. 

She had a small bag hanging around her neck, where her notebook and pencils rested. So she could take notes as she went. 

“Ah, Miss Midnight, welcome!” The maître’d offered a smile from behind the podium. She was a white unicorn pony, her black mane and tail pulled back into strict buns. Her smart black tuxedo made her look distinguished.

“Hi!” Midnight winced at the sound of her own voice. Bringing a hoof up to cough into her fetlock, hoping to clear her throat. Oh Celestia she was so nervous. “Hello, I’m excited to be here.”

The maître’d grinned, “Please follow me. We have your seat ready and waiting.”

Midnight followed along after as they made their way through the restaurant. Taking mental notes as they walked through, wishing dearly she was a unicorn so she could better scribble out notes and walk at the same time.

The restaurant was large and well lit. Beautiful crystal chandeliers hung from the ceiling, adding their softer glow to the atmosphere of the restaurant. Which was clean, impeccably so. With starched white table cloths on every table, and elegant place settings already set out. 

There was a table set up specifically for her. With several menus put onto its surface, a napkin swan, and a bottle of champagne resting in a container of ice. 

Midnight sat down easily, extracting her notebook and pencil and setting them off to the side. Flipping it open to an empty page, itching to get going, but knowing she needed to wait. “In order to review the food as accurately as possible, I’ll need your normal-sized portions. Not the sample sizes. I know the sample sizes are more traditional for critics like myself, but I need to know everything is as accurate as possible for my readers.”

The maître’d blinked, head tilting to one side. “Oh...I will have to speak with the chef, of course. He should be prepared, but this is rather unusual.”

“Of course. Normally I call ahead to inform everypony ahead of time, but this was rather sudden.”

The maître’d nodded, “I will be right back. Please, feel free to explore our menu while I sort this out.”

“Of course, thank you.” Midnight hardly waited for the mare to leave before frantically scribbling in the notebook. Writing about decor, the atmosphere, the service thus far. Trying to note as much down as she could while she could, hoping that the more information she noted down the more professional her review would be at the end. 

The menu wasn’t massive, though the drink selection was limited. There were options, of course many options. But this restaurant had clearly decided to pick a mixture of old classic dishes and newer innovations. Dedicating time, care, and quality to each and every dish. Ranging from risottos to pastas to soups, salads, and more. The selection for each category was fairly limited, but Midnight could already see where they could use up multiple ingredients and save on expenses where they could. 

It was elegant. Not simple, not really, but extremely well designed. The thought of all the dishes was making Midnight’s stomach growl hungrily, sending ripples through the fat of her stomach with the force of her hunger. 

A few minutes passed before the maître’d returned, the head chef in tow. The head chef was another unicorn, with the traditional white coat and an apron hanging from his belt. He looked rather intimidating, but the smile on his face undermined that impression.

“I’ve heard your request, but I just need to double check.” The chef said. “You intend to order the full sized dishes?”

“Yes.  And I’ll pay full price for them too, rather than the usual costs.” Midnight replied. 

The maître’d and the chef shared a look, and the chef nodded. “Of course, ma’am. That is certainly doable. Thank you very much for double checking with us.”

“Of course. You can’t do your job if you don’t know what to expect.” Midnight smiled softly. “Now, I believe I’m ready to place my first round of food.”

The chef nodded, moving to go back to the kitchen, leaving the maître’d to take the order. “I used to be a waitress. I can assure you our normal waitresses are just as competent as I am. We’re normally closed, now, is all.”

Midnight nodded, scribbling that down as well. “Alright, I would like the mozzarella in carrozza, affettati e formaggio, the spaghetti aglio e olio, gnocchi pomodoro, bucatini corti amatriciana, and the lasagna alla gino. I’ll keep the menu, if that’s alright. Bring them out as the courses are finished.”

The maître’d nodded, finishing off the ticket with a flourish, “Of course. And please, if you need anything, call for me. I’m Flawless Sugar.” Before trotting back off towards the kitchen. It didn’t take long before a busboy arrived with a cut up loaf of fresh, steaming bread. Leaving it, and some olive oil, for Midnight to munch on while she waited. 

The olive oil was of the highest quality, flavoured with garlic. The bread had a chewy, crispy crust and a fluffy interior. In all, it was rather delicious. 

The first few dishes arrived together, but Midnight didn’t mind. Sampling from all three dishes while they were still hot before clearing the plates one by one. Emptying the bread as she used it to sop up the delicious sauces that clung to the porcelain. 

The busboy, as time passed and Midnight left plates for him to pick up, became irritated. Rolling his eyes, huffing, sighing irritably when she hoofed over another plate. 

Between Flawless Sugar and the busboy, Midnight wasn’t left alone for too long. As time passed, though, and the restaurant started to get ready for opening for the night, Flawless Sugar left more and more of Midnight’s service to the busboy.

Evidently, he wasn’t like the other servers. The sighs and rolling eyes escalated and escalated as Midnight determinedly made her way through the menu. Especially once the chair she was seated on started to groan underneath her. Creaking audibly with every movement she made. 

“Where are you putting it all?” The busboy huffed, muzzle wrinkled in disgust. Dropping off another loaf of bread and picking up a few plates. “How can you eat so much, it’s just not healthy?”

Midnight noted down each insult and comment as dutifully as she wrote about the delectableness of each dish. Not wanting to slander the restaurant, not with how delicious things were, but to give the public an unbiased opinion on everything from food to service. 

She was trudging her way through the menu, hoping to get a taste of how the restaurant managed each dish. Her stomach bloated outward with each dish, pressing against the table to form an angry red line where her stomach was forced to press against the edge. She was slowing down, too, but the food was so good. Flavours dancing across her tongue, wanting her to keep going in spite of the pain building from her angry stomach.

The busboy picked up the latest set of dishes, shaking his head. Snapping his mouth shut and scurrying off once the head chef himself trotted over. 



“I don’t know if I’ve met anypony with such a love of food.” The chef praised, grinning easily. “I’m here to take your next round of orders, if you’re ready to do so.”

Midnight nodded, swallowing down her current mouthful of pasta. “I am, thank you very much.” Eyes scanning over the dessert menu, “One of all the desserts, please.”

The chef held in any reaction he might have had, scribbling on a pad easily. “Of course, ma’am. Is there anything else I can get you? More champagne? Wine?”

“Water, please.” While the champagne was delicious, she needed to keep a clear head. Something she wasn’t sure she could manage with two bottles of the sweet, delectable stuff in her stomach.

A nod, and the chef strode off. Talking with a few customers as he went, but not lingering. Clearly intent on making sure everypony was happy, and not at the expense of each other. 

Midnight burped, smothering the sound with a hoof. Heat spreading across her face, hoping that the others didn’t hear. Moving her empty plate aside to eat some more bread as she waited. Still nervous enough that she continued to eat past the point of pain. The chair was still creaking, earning a few curious glances from the other patrons.

Unknown to Midnight, it was possible to see the chair’s legs bending under her girth and the food she’d packed into her body. The supports looked strained with every movement that Midnight made, from eating to shifting her weight to reaching to write more notes. The chairs were clearly not designed with a mare like her in mind. 

“Are you still doing alright?” Flawless Sugar asked when she came by with two types of water, sparkling or flat. The sparkling was nice enough, especially when chilled.

“I am. Everything is delicious so far.”

The smile on Flawless Sugar’s face was genuine, “Good! I’m so glad. Again, please let us know if you need anything.” Sauntering away to handle other guests, once again leaving Midnight to her bread.

The busboy returned, sighing exaggeratedly as he spotted the fact that Midnight was still eating. Shaking his head, glaring at her. At least he was doing his job. It would be worse if he was incompetant and rude.

When the first wave of dishes arrived, carried by the moody busboy, something clicked in Midnight’s mind. Chasing away the nerves and strengthening her resolve. 

If he was so disgusted, she’d give him a real show. 

Tiramisu, gelato, crepes, cioccolatissimo, and more were soon being shoveled into her mouth with renewed vigour. Even as her stomach churned and groaned loudly, earning some glares and chatter from other patrons. 

By the final dish, a lovely lemon-honey semifreddo, she’d slowed again. Trying to do her best to swallow back the painful nausea that threatened to overtake her. Her stomach well and truly packed to the brim now. It was hard not to whimper and whine with every mouthful of the delectable dish she managed to swallow. 

The busboy returned to clear the last of the empty dishes, and snorted in disgust, “This is ridiculous. You’re like a pig at a trough, haven’t you had enough yet?”

Midnight was about to retort something, but caught movement from behind the busboy.

The head chef and maître’d both approached from behind the busboy.

In spite of how full she felt, Midnight did the first thing that popped into her head: by meeting the busboy’s gaze with a glare of her own, and oinking and snorting loudly. Just like a pig, as she shoveled the last of the semifreddo into her mouth.

With the last bite swallowed, she had to lean back with a pained groan. Feeling heavy and slow, sweat prickling across her body as the blood rushed to her stomach in order to start the digestion process. Bringing her hooves to her engorged tummy, the smallest pressure triggered a belch that was loud enough (and powerful enough) to rattle the cutlery and send the busboy back a few steps in order to get away.

Shocked silence reigned for a few moments, aside from a relieved sigh from Midnight at the sudden release of pressure.

A beat, two. And the chef rounded on the busboy, “You come with me. We need to go see Crystal Clarity right now.”

The busboy, still shell-shocked, grabbed the last of Midnight’s dishes before following the chef into the back. Head bowed, ears lowered, it looked almost as though his tail were tucked between his legs.

“I’m so sorry about him.” Flawless Sugar said after another beat. “If he’s upset you at all, then please have my sincerest apology-”

“It’s alright.” Midnight managed, scooting back her chair a little to reveal how much her stomach had bloated outward. “This was good, very good. And aside from him, your service was impeccable.”

“Crystal Clarity is our manager. I can guarantee you that he won’t stand for the treatment of one of our valued customers, a critic or no. We take service very seriously here. Is there anything else I can do for you? I know there’s no real way we can make up for such a blunder-”

“It’s okay.” Midnight repeated. “I think the look on his face was repayment enough for all he said and did. And I’ll be sure to mention your quick response when you realized what was wrong. Though I might suggest making sure employees treat everypony with respect, regardless of size.”

“Yes, of course. We’re given sensitivity training…” Flawless Sugar sighed, offering a shrug, “Again, I apologize. We should have realized something was wrong. Are you ready to pay now? There’s no rush, you’re welcome to stay as long as you need.”

Midnight shook her head, “No, no. I’ve got a review to write after all, I appreciate it though. I uh...do have one request.”

“Yes?”

“I’ll need a hoof getting up.” It felt like she’d eaten an anvil rather than half a menu’s worth of food. 

“Of course of course.” Flawless Sugar helped Midnight to her hooves. Letting the bloated bat pony waddle her way to the front, where the bill was settled. 

“I’ll be sure to send you a copy of the review before it goes to print. Expect it in a week or so.” Midnight said. Panting weakly. The meal really had taken more out of her than she’d thought, making her feel weak and sluggish. Weighing on her in an odd way that made it difficult to catch her breath.

“We’ll look forward to it. Please, come again whenever you’d like.” Flawless smiled, even as an alarming gurgle from Midnight’s stomach made her wince. 

Midnight nodded, waddling her way out of the restaurant. Being careful of her bloated, sensitive stomach. Wheezing, huffing and puffing for air, letting out the occasional burp as she went. 

She had a review to write, after all. And there was no time like the present, when she could still clearly remember everything. 
> Griffish Gluttony
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

Critics, reviewers, writers, and chefs weaved their way off the large cruise ship. Some of them were chatting as they made their way down the gangplank, but a number of them were simply trying to get away from one of their number.

Midnight, in the months since her Istallion Indulgences article, had a growing reputation. And waistline. She was one of the last to step onto the gangplank, wheezing her way as she trundled down it.

She was clearly on the ‘wrong’ side of obesity now. Huffing and puffing as she managed to keep up with the stragglers of the group. Her face reddened, sweat beading along her coat and under her little-used wings.

Midnight had been hired by Travel Paradise: a vacation company that had their hooves in everything from resorts to cruise ships, and a lot of things in between. Spotting the growing talent, they’d offered her a spot to help others ‘stress test’ the staff and facilities of their new resort: The Four Seasons. 

The Four Seasons would be opening soon, within a matter of weeks, so Travel Paradise had hired out a number of ponies and creatures that were willing to spend some time on one of their cruise ships, and on the resort properly. Hoping to spread positive press and build up their reputation for the coming summer months.

Midnight slowed to a stop when the ponies in front of her did. Her knees and hips aching underneath her as she was forced to carry her bulk for longer than she’d anticipated. And they hadn’t even had lunch before disembarking!

The hungry growls of her stomach drew disgusted glares and a few frustrated huffs from some of the fancier ponies near her. 

There was a stage, and a staff member was talking. But between her growling stomach and wheezing breathing, there wasn’t much hope that Midnight could hear what the presentation was about. Probably a welcome speech of some sort, maybe an induction ceremony. 

This gave her time to look around, at least, and stretch out the kinks in her neck after the week of travel. It had been on a large cruise ship, but at her size, travel of any kind was hard on the body.

The Isle was beautiful. She’d give them that, a good place to build a resort. The weather was supposed to be mild year round, and somewhat isolated from the mainland, while still being close enough somepony could easily make day trips into other parts of the country. 

To the right of the resort was a path that would take someone to one of many stretches of beaches. In the distance, Midnight could see some of the famous landscape in action: verdant hills and the peaks of downlands near the coast. Perhaps there would be chines here, where coastal gorges formed from rivers running into the sea. Midnight had done some reading to prepare herself for this trip, and she was excited to see the landscape so many had praised over the years.

“-and thank you once again for joining us! I know you’ve not had lunch yet, but there will be our brunch buffet after the tour. Please follow me!” The unicorn waved a sign in the air, and the group took off with the cohesiveness of a broken cheese sauce. 

The resort was beautiful. It had been an old manor house belonging to some important griffon or another before it had been sold to the company for refurbishment and expansion. There were sprawling gardens at the back of the manor house proper, a pool, a spa, a small gym, and a few other modern conveniences that the wealth elite that had once lived here couldn’t have imagined.

It wasn’t long before Midnight trailed behind the slowest of the ponies. Her belly swaying beneath her, being pushed by her flabby legs as she struggled to keep herself moving forward. Her rear swaying, flanks overhanging her hocks, making it all the more difficult to keep walking at an ‘average’ pace for any amount of time.

Even trailing behind the others, Midnight wasn’t stupid. Ears twitching as she heard whispers up ahead.

“How is she so slow?”

“Do you think she could eat out the buffet? I’m really hungry-”

“How did such a lardass get this job? She didn’t even make it down the gangplank without needing to stop and catch her breath!”

Midnight clenched her jaw, grit her teeth, and kept moving. Unable to hear the tour guide because of her wheezing breaths and how far back she was, but even with the pain she could appreciate how much work had gone into remodeling the place. Preserving the stately, griffon manor house feeling while having modern amenities like air conditioning. 

Which was helping, she admitted to herself. The sweat prickling across her body and dampening her coat helped keep her cool too, but nothing was diminishing the pain in her burning, aching legs. 

So wrapped up in walking, Midnight didn’t realize when a staff member rolled up beside her in what looked like a golf cart. “Ma’am? Ma’am?”

The third ‘ma’am’ caught Midnight’s attention, making her slow to a stop. Puffing for air, wheezing loudly. She didn’t wait for an invitation before she was clambering onto the cart, making it creak and groan under her weight. Her rear hung over the side, and her flabby body pressed into the attendant who was driving. 

Midnight was better able to listen to the tour after that, even as the rumours and snide comments grew exponentially for the kindness the staff had given her.

Finally, they made their way through the maze of corridors to enter what was now the buffet room. Resembling a high-end buffet, it was extensive and beautiful. Offering a bit of food from around the world, but Midnight knew what the chefs here would be focusing on: the Griffish food. 

Making her way off the cart, Midnight used the strength she had to push her way past all the ponies that had been commenting about her. She grabbed up a few plates and piled them high with all sorts of goodies. One of them was the traditional Griffish breakfast, while another was piled with the fixings of a traditional roast fish. Everything from the baked beans to the yorkshire puddings looked delicious, like everything she’d ever read about traditional Griffish cookery. 

She took enough food to feed four ponies easily, in spite of a few moans and groans of the ponies behind her. Waddling back to the seating area, she let out a sigh of relief when she sat down. 

The notebook and pencil came out before she was completely settled. Already eager to scribble out notes about her experience thus far. It didn’t take her long before she was gorging herself on the food, making a scene for those who couldn’t handle the way she did things.

“Sweet Celestia look at her go-”

“She’s not at all like Gourmand or the others. How is she even able to do this?”

“Such appalling manners, not at all like Zesty-”

Each comment had Midnight eating more and more. Eagerly gobbling down the food she’d taken for herself, only pausing to take notes or belch obnoxiously. At least the other ponies weren’t crowding around her, that was a bonus to all of this.

When she finished her first round, she motioned for one of the staff. Having them bring her the next ‘course’ of items. There was no restriction on what the servers brought, leading to Midnight’s table being covered in plates groaning with food. 

Midnight couldn’t help but chuckle to herself as she continued to gorge. Service a la francaise is what the ancient ponies called this. Or something similar. Piling her table high with an assortment of dishes, she was left to serve herself. Mixing sweet and savoury as she pleased. 

It was different to the norm, and as Midnight ate, she made sure to monopolize the staff’s attention. Waving them down more aggressively when the rude ponies from earlier were trying to get a word in edgewise. 

It was silly perhaps, but Midnight couldn’t help but grin at the looks on their faces. Barely containing their outrage. This was going to be fun.

(LINE BREAK)

Quality Caramel relaxed as the spa pony filed down her hooves, letting out a quiet sigh. Finally, the chip in her back left hoof would be fixed and Tasty Trifle would leave her alone about it. 

Why had she needed to wait three whole days before getting it fixed? Because of that slob Midnight. 

An ‘up and coming critic’, the flabby bat-pony seemed intent on stressing everypony out. Staff and other testers alike, it was ridiculous! She monopolized the staff’s time, ate so much she could hardly move after, had the worst manners Quality had ever seen and it was just so stupid! How could one fat pony ruin things for everyone else?

When Quality had poked her head into the dining hall this morning, she’d been pleased to note Midnight was busy stuffing herself to bursting with the buffet again. So Quality had been keen to rush down here and get the pampering she deserved, and  get her hoof fixed.

“More champagne?” An attendant asked, and Quality nodded. The lounges were comfortable, snacks excellent, and the champagne flowed freely. It was all she could ask, plus some. Since she didn’t need to worry about that Midnight coming and ruining everything.”

The champagne was bubbly and sweet, with a slight sting that could be easily masked behind some quality orange juice. Quality contemplated the idea as her other hooves were worked on. Soaking up the quiet, peaceful atmosphere. The sounds of running water, gentle music, the sounds of wind rustling the trees.

The sound of a familiar wheezing made Quality’s heart sink somewhere into the foundation of the building. Tension immediately returned to her entire body as she used her magic to move the cucumber slice covering her eye. Not bothering to hide the glare as she watched Midnight trundle through. 

Honestly the mare really had let herself go.

Midnight’s cheeks were chubby, hanging down slightly to merge with the first of two extra fatty chins that competed for space alongside her jowls. Her neck was flabby too, looking soft and moved about with every movement she made. Threatening to form a roll against her pudgy pigeon chest which threatened to merge with her gargantuan belly.

Her stomach hung from a wide barrel, swinging between her legs like a pendulum and pressing against her legs to the point that Midnight’s only form of movement was waddling. Her wings bore her weight as well, looking like plump pillows rather than limbs. Her legs fared no better, looking as flabby and ill used as the rest of her. Her hooves beginning to look small in comparison to the weight suspended above them. Even Midnight’s rear had grown along with the rest of her, enlarging her cutie mark and overhanging her hocks.

Midnight’s entire body jiggled and wiggled as she moved, showing off the loose fat under her skin. 

Quality bit back a derisive snort, watching as one of the attendants rushed to meet he obese bat pony. It took a few of them, of course, because the pig was so out of shape. Red faced and coated in sweat, Quality couldn’t help but wonder why Midnight even bothered to make the trip. It was obviously bad for her constitution, though the exercise certainly wasn’t a bad idea.

Thusly satisfied she knew what was going on, Quality closed her eye and replaced the cucumber. Hearing Midnight and the others as they got the corpulent mare settled on one of the lounges. 

Quality almost jumped out of her skin when soft, warm fat pressed into her back. And stayed there. The pig had picked the closest one to her, even though the others were unoccupied. How rude!

“I’ll need champagne,” Midnight demanded, “And snacks.” Celestia the bat pony really did have no manners. 

Quality’s attendant stayed with her, thankfully, but Midnight’s reputation was well established by now. There were no idle hooves (or claws, some of the staff were griffons after all) around Midnight. She monopolized their time, asking banal questions and always demanding more food.

The sounds of Midnight eating just about made Quality get up and leave, uneven hooves or not. But she was three quarters of the way done and it would only take a few more minutes before she could go.

Midnight ate loudly. Belching and slurping and still panting for breath even though she’d been settled for a while. 
Quality tried not to think about whether or not the sweat beading along her back was her own, or Midnight’s. I’ll shower after this. Just to be safe.

“Alright, Miss Midnight, what would you like?”

“Hooficure and a massage.” Midnight managed to spit out irritably. 

Quality checked a sigh. Staying in place while her own hooves were worked on. From the sounds behind her, there were multiple attendants with Midnight now. Working to massage the mare’s flabby body and attend to her hooves. 

All the while, the obese blob ate and drank champagne like she deserved to.

It was all Quality could manage not to start screaming, but she knew better than to cause a scene. The staff here had it hard enough.

When the belching became more regular, Quality couldn’t help but lift the cucumber slice and crane around to see. Watching as the masseuse did his work. Midnight was so full that the slightest pressure made a belch escape her. 

Another sigh, and the eating only ramped up. 

The moment her hoof was finished, Quality all but fled the spa. Leaving Midnight to her armada of attendants, not noticing the satisfied smile on Midnight’s face as the mare munched on another hooffull of chocolate truffles. 


(LINE BREAK)

“What do you mean there was no room service?” Powder Puff asked, leaning closer to the mirror to better see as she reapplied her lipstick.

“There was no room service!” Greta replied, huffing angrily from where she was washing her claws. “Nothing! Geralt and I couldn’t order a single thing, and we’d missed dinner playing bingo, and we were starving!”

“I heard it was Midnight’s fault.” Boreal Sun added from where she was touching up her blush. The three older women, two ponies and a griffon, shared a look. 

“Of course it was.” Powder Puff whined. “And we didn’t even get to eat much at breakfast either, because she’d basically demolished it by herself. How in Celestia’s name is that mare even walking about?”

Greta shrugged, “Beats me. Honestly, if it weren’t for her appalling manners, I’d be almost impressed with how much she can put away.”

Boreal Sun rolled her eyes, “She’s just disgusting! Smearing food all over. Did you hear? Quality Caramel said she oinked! Like a pig!”

Greta dried her claws off, “Huh. That’s...wow.”

“We shouldn’t be surprised, honestly. Did you see how covered in gravy her muzzle was after she managed to eat a whole tray of roast fish?” Powder Puff huffed, smacking her lips together and turning her head side to side to see how the rest of her makeup held up. “Honestly, I can’t believe they haven’t kicked her out for her appalling manners. She keeps so much of the staff for herself! It’s unfair for the rest of us.”

“I’m going to complain, once we’re home.” Boreal sighed. “I hate to, but I want compensation. I can’t give a good review if I don’t know how the service is. You can hardly get anypony’s attention.”

“I was supposed to work with the chefs, see about learning about hardy, Griffish food but I haven’t been able to.” Greta bemoaned. “I was so excited to learn, but the chefs are just too busy to spare anyone.”

The three ladies sighed. 

“Well. We’ll complain once this is all done. Maybe Midnight will stick to the buffet tonight, and we can test out the room service for ourselves.” Boreal said, almost tentatively.

“We can hope.” Powder Puff put her makeup back into her bag. “Good luck ladies, may you find some peace away from that disgusting pig.”

The three filed out of the bathroom. Never bothering to check to see if the stalls behind them were empty.

Midnight’s lips thinned into a strict line. Better to ramp it up then.

(LINE BREAK)

There were bags under the server’s eyes as she trotted between the buffet line and the table where Midnight was sitting, eating away. The others all looked tired too, and frazzled. But they were working hard, doing their best to keep up with Midnight’s growing demands. Rushing this way and that, doing their best to keep up with the requests from the other visitors as well.

Over the last four days, Midnight’s gluttony had grown to new heights. Midnight never went a moment without her stomach being stuffed to capacity. Her rump filled out narrow doorways now, and she used her body to block off the insulting reviewers from going to where they wanted to go.

Even now her chair was thrown back further than it needed to be. Blocking off easy access to the buffet to some of the louder critics of her manners. 

It was the last night of the visit now, with the cruise ship picking everyone up in the morning. One last dinner, one special buffet for everyone who was here. 

And, as her usual, Midnight’s demands overrode everyone else’s. She had the serving staff rushing around. Getting food and drinks, clearing plates, running to the kitchens to ask questions about the food. 

Midnight was out-eating everyone else combined, face coated in various sauces and crumbs. Her hooves were just as filthy as she picked up the food to eat it when she wasn’t lazy enough to just go muzzle in.

Quality Caramel, after the fifth time of asking for another glass of wine, stood up with a frustrated yell. Ending the activity with the sound, all eyes turned towards her. 

“This is enough!” Quality yelled, face red and trembling with pent up anger. “You are a gluttonous, rude pony who can’t even walk the length of this room without being winded!”

Another voice broke through the near-silence. “You’re so obese! Shouldn’t you stop eating so much?”

“Where are you even putting all that food, anyway! Nopony can eat that much!”

“You’re filthy! Look at you! I think you’ve got chocolate in your mane  from last night!”

The voices rose in crescendo, more and more voices blending together to voice their angry concerns.

“You’re a fat, fucking useless pig who’s done nothing but get in the way!” Quality’s voice once more rose above the rest. Heaving for breath now with how angry she was.

The voices died after that, heads swiveling between Midnight and Quality, not sure at all what was going to happen now. Some sort of line had been crossed, surely.

Midnight let out a sigh, turning towards the nearest server, “Security is on the way, right?”

The server, who looked aghast at the critics, managed a nod.

“Good.” Midnight didn’t stop her eating. Reaching across an empty platter for the next thing. She let out a sigh, watching as one of the servers leaned against a nearby table, clearly needing some sort of break.

Her eyes widened, and she looked at the other servers. Noting the eye bags, the frazzled hair, mussed uniforms. “Oh. I, I’m sorry. I think there was a misunderstanding.”

“For what!? You’ve ruined everyone’s time here! Not just us but the servers too!”

“I think I took ‘stress test’ a little too seriously. I’ve never done anything like this before. I thought we were supposed to test their ability to cope with everything. Their patience, quality of service, everything.” Midnight shrugged, sending ripples across her form with the motion. “Maybe this doesn’t mean much, but everyone has done so well. The resort is getting a glowing review of their services, everyone was so kind. Even with as much of a bitch I’ve been, you all did splendidly.”

Midnight popped another morsel into her mouth, chewing it contemplatively as she used a napkin to wipe the worst of the mess off her face and hooves before reaching for the server who was still stood there, shell shocked. The poor dear looked about ready to dissolve into tears.

Midnight wrapped the mare in a hug, “I’m sorry for running you all into the ground, but you were doing so well. I should have realized I was taking it too far.”

There was a sniffle from the server, and Midnight had been about to reply when Powder Puff stood to join Caramel. 

“Well then, where are our apologies! We demand apologies, you ruined this experience for the rest of us with your naivete!”

There were murmurs of agreement, and shouts from a few of the critics and reviewers who had been hit hardest by Midnight’s actions.

Midnight pulled away from the hug, ears flattening against her skull, “Fuck you! I heard what you were all saying! From the moment I got onto the cruise ship you all were judging me!” Standing up on blubbery legs, moving at a surprising speed considering her size. Pushing Quality and Powder Puff, and a few other dissenters, to the ground. “You all bad mouthed me without knowing me! Calling me names and wanting special treatment because I was doing my best to do my job!” Her flabby belly pinned them to the ground, even with their squirming and shrieking.

She turned to the server, “Can you bring me a few more meals please? Not quite full yet?” Voice sweet and gentle again, even though she had to speak loudly over the struggling ponies beneath her. 

A nod, and the servers were once again in motion. Midnight grinned .Finally, revenge was hers.

(LINE BREAK)

The next morning dawned cool and clear, Celestia’s sun rising high into the sky and dispelling any sort of gloom that might have lingered after the show last night. 

The crowd of ponies, and their luggage, were making their way onto the ship. Chattering amongst themselves as they’d been doing when they’d disembarked a week ago. Trying to put what had happened the night before past them.

Midnight wasn’t the slowest pony for once. The reviewers she’d squished the night before were bruised and stiff, limping their way down the docks at a pace that even Midnight found pathetic. 

Unlike Midnight, the rude ones weren’t offered a lift in the golf cart. 

Still, the slow pokes let Midnight say her goodbyes to the staff. Chatting with them amicably as they waited for everyone else to board. 

“You know, you all are excellent at your jobs. Hopefully no one like me comes along,” Midnight grinned. “But if they do, I know you can handle it all with poise and grace.” Hugging one of the younger staff members close with a chuckle. “You’ll all do wonderfully when you open, I know it. And the next time I come back, I promise I won’t be this much of a bitch.”

“I can’t believe you took Powder Puff down a couple notches.” One of the girls said, “It was amazing.”

“Quality Caramel, too. She was snotty.” Another girl added, wrinkling her muzzle.

Midnight chuckled, laughing especially hard once the group of ponies finally made it. They were glaring and making threats under their breaths as they limped their way up the gangplank, but Midnight paid them no mind.

“That’s me, then.” Midnight sighed, pulling away. “Good luck all! And keep an eye out, my review should be out in a few weeks.” Turning to the gangplank and making her way up it. Ignoring the wood groaning and bending under her weight, she didn’t even mind that she had to stop and catch her breath halfway up before continuing again. 

Just another day in the life of a critic.
> Thestral Treat Therapy
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

River Dream stirred her coffee before lifting the steaming mug to her muzzle. Inhaling the deep, rich scent before risking a sip. It was still too hot to drink it down quickly, but sipping at it was easy enough. 

Gave her mind some time to wake up on her own terms. Blinking blearily at the wooden cabinets in her kitchen, sipping her coffee, River could imagine that things were different. Easier, less fraught with worry.

And then Midnight would roll over or sore, and it would set River worrying all over again. 

River Dream was a bat pony, like Midnight, though her colouring was vastly different. Her mane and tail were light teal mint, accented by darker green stripes. Her mane was short and messy, and her tail was long and flowing. Her fur was greyish green-almost a very, very dark teal

River and Midnight were close friends, having known each other for several years. They shared a love of food and booze, and it helped them bond over the years. Especially over the last two years, when Midnight’s career started to really take off.

She emptied her mug before she really meant to, so River poured herself another. Adding in some sugar and stirring it in so it dissolved. The second cup was about as heavenly as the first, and it made her feel like the cobwebs in her head were clearing. 

Damned publisher. River’s nostrils flared with the reflexive snort, rolling her eyes irritably at the mere thought of such a nasty stallion.

Poetic Perfection deserved nothing less than what he’d got, but the way he’d used Midnight to his own advantage had ruined her. Ruined her friend, hurt her savings, threatened her reputation…

Letting Midnight sleep, River tiptoed past the living room. Pausing only when Midnight let out a particularly loud snore. Peering over the back of the living chair, River could see Midnight on her side. The couch sagging and groaning underneath her. The couch looked more and more crushed every time River saw it. 

Content that Midnight was alright, River made it outside to sit on her porch. Watching as the town of Hollow Shades came alive as the sun rose further into the sky. 

A year ago, Midnight had done the cruise and hotel gig. And with that under her belt, and a growing reputation right alongside her waistline, the publishing company had been eager to keep her working. Keep her publishing blogs and articles for people to read.

Poetic Perfection galvanized Midnight's growing popularity and her reputation of being an insatiable glutton. Using her almost like a weapon, using her to ‘review’ opening businesses knowing that, without restraint, Midnight would eat them out of stock and derail their opening nights. And, regardless of her opinions on the matter, Poetic would twist the reviews she wrote into a negative, or derogatory, towards the restaurants, their owners, and their staff.

All because Poetic owned or had ties to other restaurants. He wanted to monopolize the market, and he managed it for almost a full year.

Understandably, Midnight did not take the news well.

A half-crushed publisher and an appeal to the Lunar Court later: things were looking up. Reparations to the ponies she’d been used against had been repaid (she’d even hoofed over a few-hundred of her own bits to help), and Midnight finally got the vacation she’d been moaning about for months.

Only it wasn’t really a vacation. Not in the nice, relaxing way most ponies would see it. 

Midnight was only doing alright because she could coast by on her savings, and even then they weren’t what they should have been because of Poetic. She hadn’t fought for her pay, opting instead to have her wages help the ponies who’s businesses she’d unwittingly destroyed. And yet, the lack of bits still worried her. 

River didn’t want to think what might happen if somepony tried charging Midnight rent for now. And still, Midnight spent most of her days asleep on the couch that was starting to crumble under her weight. Even then she wasn’t eating like she normally would. 

Midnight was down in the dumps, and River wasn’t entirely sure how to fix it. 

“Um, excuse me? Miss River?” A schoolpony’s voice broke River from her reverie, and she took the offered flyer without thinking. 

“What is it?” She asked, skimming over the bright fonts. 

“It’s for Hollow Shade’s Summer Harvest Festival!” The filly chirped, looking both excited and nervous. Worrying at her lower lip as River continued to read. “It...well...Um, we all know how Miss Midnight has been recently. It’s not on any of the merchandise or flyers or anything, but a lot of the ponies in charge have been saying there’s gonna be enough food there that even she can’t eat it all.”

River blinked, a huge smile spreading across her face and making dimples appear in her chubby cheeks. “Oh really? Well thank you for telling us. And it’s tomorrow?”

The filly nodded, returning the grin. “Yes ma’am!”

“Excellent. It’s a safe bet we’ll be there. Now you go run along.”

Already an idea was forming in her mind. Letting her mind wander, River finished the last of her coffee as she gave the flyer another look over.

Nothing brightened Midnight’s spirit like food after all. And who was River to deny her friend an experience that might bring her out of her slump?

(LINE BREAK)

“Come on, Middy, it’s supposed to be a festival! We’ve got to try everything we possibly can, there’s so much here I haven’t had in over a year!” River, though she too was fat, wasn’t nearly as out of shape as Midnight. Making it easy for her to waddle ahead of her friend, her belly swaying and rump jiggling as she moved. 

Midnight was slower. Not just because of her massive frame but because of her slump. Even the smells of the wonderful array of food on offer wasn’t enough to brighten her day, even though her stomach was audibly grumbling, begging for nourishment. 

“Okay….okay.” Midnight was grossly out of shape for this. Waddling even slower than a year previous, her whole body swaying and jostling as she fought to keep her bulk upright and moving. Sweat darkened her coat, her cheeks were flushed from exertion, and her breathing was just as audible as her growling stomach. 

While Midnight seated herself at one of the nearby tables, needing to sit well back on one of the benches just to fit her stomach in the space, River started putting the plan into place. Going from stall to stall to grab up a few things for them to share. Cotton candy, corn on the cob, carrot dogs, a giant soft pretzel the size of a pony’s head, and sugary lemonade to help keep them cool during the worst of the summer heat.

Normally Midnight would be insatiable, able to clear out the carts and stalls with hardly a thought. But not today. She grazed, almost mindlessly, but didn’t gorge as she usually would. 

River didn’t have any qualms though. Hoping that, through example, she might spur Midnight back into her usual habits. 

River was also a messy eater, and messier than Midnight. Forgoing even the pretence of manners or cleanliness in order to shovel more food into her gullet. Mustard smeared across her chubby cheeks, a few strands of cotton candy managed to cling to her mane, and crumbs stuck to the fur of her pudgy pigeon chest.

Popcorn, cut up watermelon, three whole pizzas, deep fried vegetables, deep fried funnel cakes, ice cream...There really was enough food to make Midnight pause, and all of it was delicious and well made. Owners and workers leaning over counters to try to see Midnight and River tackle it all.

Midnight couldn’t help it, not really. Her mind categorically matching the foodstuff to the proprietor. Making mental notes as she chewed. Even producing a notebook from River’s saddlebags to start scribbling absentmindedly, not really even aware she was doing it.

Critiquing had become second nature to her, like eating and breathing. It was all on autopilot, she didn’t realize she was even doing it until a few ponies started whispering about it.

Grumpily putting the notebook away, the two mares finished their course before managing to extricate themselves from the seating area for a proper look around. 

The fair was bright and alive with colour and music, most of it garish and loud. Rides, games, stalls selling wares, came from all over Equestria to be here. Midnight could pick out a few that she was familiar with from her travels: jewelry, clothes, pottery, antiques. A vast, wide array that was worth the look, even if it made Midnight wish for another dozen lemonades. 

“Oh there’s an eating contest! Pies!” River pointed.

Midnight trundled to a slow stop. Wheezing and gasping for air, even as she shook her head. “No. Not...happening.”

“Oh come on! It’s from local fruit on a local orchard! All sorts of pies, not like what they have in Ponyville or Vanhoover!”

“No, River.” Midnight frowned, shaking her head even more. Sending her fat sloshing down her body. “I’m not...doing it.”

River pouted, rolling her eyes playfully. Even as she caught sight of what, to the untrained eye, would look like another picnic area. But what she knew was where the contest would be held. “Alright, alright, fine. Ruin my fun. How about you come sit down here, and I’ll go get us some more drinks. That beer place you liked so much is here. Nothing a cold pint can’t help with.”

“Sounds...good.” Midnight agreed, waddling her way towards the promised seating area with all the speed she could muster. Sitting on a wide bench that bowed and creaked under her weight, she was just thankful for a place to sit. 

The feasting from earlier, though it couldn’t really be called a ‘feast’ for Midnight, had already bloated her stomach. The blood was rushing to the stuffed organ, making her feel slower and more sluggish than usual. She was sweating rather profusely now, from the heat and the food and the walking, making her wheeze and pant for breath even as she started to relax under the tent. 

“I’ll go grab a couple other things, too. Pretty sure I saw a caramel apple that looked awesome!”

If Midnight had been paying more attention, she might have recognized the look on her friend’s face. But she was too busy catching her breath and rubbing at her churning stomach to pay River much more mind, so she missed the telltale smirk..

River ran off to find the ponies in charge of the eating contest, and managed to sign for Midnight since the town knew Midnight was with her anyway. It was no secret that Midnight’s massive size made it difficult to walk, and the judges seemed to believe River’s excuse that ‘Midnight was saving her strength for the competition.’

River did, at least, get the pints and a caramel apple for the portly mare to drink and munch on in the final half hour before the contest. Managing to slip away to disappear into the audience before the rest of the contestants arrived. 

The newcomers were an array of sizes, which was why benches were provided rather than individual chairs. Only one of the other contestants was near Midnight’s size, a stallion of some renown in the eating competition world by the name of: Caramel Bolt.

He was massive, in terms of height and weight. An earth pony, he towered over most others. And might have been an intimidating figure if he weren’t so fat. He sported a spherical face, a spare tire where his neck should have been, a stomach that hung past his knees, and a rump bigger than most fully grown mares. His caramel coloured mane and tail, complimented by a dark red coat. 

The others were unimportant, to Midnight at least. But with Caramel’s arrival, Midnight knew she’d been had. As the last of the newcomers got settled, and the curtain rose, Midnight found her fat friend and shot her a death glare.

River waved, her leg fat rippling with the motion and dimples marring her chipmunk-like cheeks. Clearly enjoying the show already as the announcer, sadly indistinct because of the lack of proper audio equipment, spoke over the chattering crowd. 

A group of kindly old mares rolled carts filled with pies, stacking ten blueberry pies in front of each contestant. 

Midnight strained to hear, ears twitching.

“-nd gentlecolts! The All-Fruit Orchard has produced some of their best pies in the last decade, and they’ve gratefully offered them up for these fine contestants here! This is the speed round, and after that we have endurance. The last pony standing, provided they eat these initial ten pies, wins!”

It was indistinct again, but whatever the announcer said had the crowd in an uproar. And what was clear was the starting whistle.

So, given this crazy situation that she didn’t sign up for, Midnight did what Midnight did best:eating. 

She all but dove into the first pie. Forgoing the provided utensils entirely to sink muzzle deep into the delectable dessert. 

After the first pie was demolished, all Midnight could think about was the next. And the next. Hardly stopping to breathe much less do anything else, except for the occasional drink of water where the crust gummed in her mouth too much. For her, this was...perfunctory. Awakening a partially dormant part of her for the first time in months. 

It was like another day, nothing special. But the pies were good, and that helped. Even with the sticky filling clinging to her coat and staining her cheeks purple, and crumbs sticking to her muzzle. 

Blueberry was replaced with lemon meringue, and the meringue clung to Midnight’s muzzle far more than the blueberry did. It was tart and not too sweet, just how she liked it.

Peach-blackberry was next. The flavours of the sweet and tart fruit mixed well, and Midnight couldn’t help but groan as she easily ate the ten pies. Not noticing that all the other competitors except for Caramel had dropped out. Leaving the two piggy ponies by themselves as they continued to eat.

The fourth round was ginger plum. A unique set of flavourings to be sure, one to be noted down and thought about later.

When Caramel stopped one pie short of the ten, Midnight paused as well. Chewing at the buttery crust as she realized that the excited chattering of the crowd had mostly died down. Revealing awe, disgust, curiosity, and more. 

Now she was thinking about it, sound flooded back. Catching whispers and half murmured conversations.

“Sweet Celestia, look at her go! Is she breathing?”

“I think she’s visibly gaining weight with every mouthful!”

“I’ve had that pie, it was so rich I couldn’t have more than a small slice-”

Pulling away, ears twitching back, Midnight swallowed the current mouthful of pie. Heart dropping somewhere into the bedrock below the town. Even as Caramel, seeing a chance, managed to find the strength to start eating again.

Seeing that the competitors had so few pies left, the next course was brought  and set up for them to eat, even though the mares hesitated slightly in front of Midnight as she looked ready to pull away.

“Wait is she dropping out?”

“She was doing so well, I’ve never seen a pony even manage three rounds before!”

“-except for Caramel, he’s awesome, but never a newcomer!”

Midnight’s heart lifted, and she finished the last of the ginger plum pie with hardly a thought. Grinning widely as her stomach roared for more. She raised her head to look out across the crowd when she reached for the next pie. Snorting and oinking for their pleasure before diving right back into it. 

Caramel just couldn’t keep up, though he stayed seated at the table beside her. Sipping at water, rubbing at his distended gut, he looked thoroughly chuffed at what had happened. Awe, and respect, building as Midnight ate her way through pecan pie, peanut butter pie, peach cream tarts, grilled citrus pie, and finally a heavy rhubarb cream tart.

She won. Outclassing Caramel by four rounds and beating even the best time on the speed round. Her stomach was hard and bloated, grazing the ground as River helped pull her to her hooves so they could make it home. 

As the sun sunk towards the western horizon, the pair chatted eagerly about food as River helped push Midnight along. Literally, as Midnight’s overstuffed stomach was hard for the obese mare to reach around to walk, much less move without assistance. 

Her stomach churned underneath her, making all the more noise as her legs pushed against it when she moved. At the start of the day, it had brushed her legs when she waddled, but now her stomach was bulging against them. Making her belch with the increased pressure, making their journey take all the longer  It also made it harder for her to walk. And more painful, but it was a good kind of pain. One Midnight was familiar with. One that spelled victory, not that anypony else had much of a chance with her around. 

By the time they made it back to River’s house, the sun was sinking over the horizon, and a cool breeze helped cool them down as Midnight inched down the road. 

Exhausted, and very much out of shape, the pair stopped when they saw an unfamiliar silhouette waiting for them outside the house. The pair of fat mares panting for breath, watching warily as the guard (for he was clearly a guard) approached. 

He was handsome, with a clear love of food in spite of the fitness requirements for the job. A bat pony as well, with a purplish grey coat and a mane that Midnight couldn’t quite see considering the dim light. 

He half bowed, “Forgive me for intruding upon your evening, but Princess Luna has been impressed within Miss Midnight’s integrity and dedication to remonstrations in her recent court proceedings. As a reward, her Highnesshas invited Miss Midnight for the Equestria Baking Contest. You would serve as this year’s celebrity judge, alongside the princesses.” He produced an invitation from somewhere, holding it out for Midnight to take.

Midnight took it, letting River read over her shoulder. The pair shared a look, River nudged Midnight’s flabby shoulder, and Midnight beamed. 

“I’m happy...to accept!” Grinning wildly.

“I’m very pleased to hear that ma’am. It will include a tour of the city’s finest establishments, accomodations in the castle, and access to the castle kitchens.”

“I’ll get your bag ready. Maybe this hunk will get you loaded up into a sky carriage.” River shot Midnight a wink before disappearing into the house. 

“I will assist you should you need the help.”

“I need the help.” Midnight burped, groaning at it. “Push my stomach, please. Anyway, what’s your name?”

“Lieutenant Gladiolus, ma’am.” Gladiolus rounded Midnight’s side, and started pushing Midnight’s stomach for her. Much like River had been doing. 

“Good to meet you.” Midnight panted, crawling across the ground towards where she thought she could see the glint of a carriage.

Gladiolus stayed quiet after that, leaving the two to labour in companionable silence until they’d gotten her impressive bulk into the extra wide, extra reinforced carriage so they could get their journey underway.
> Just Desserts
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

Luna pressed another cookie into her muzzle with an appreciative huff. Watching as the servants continued their work out in the gardens, setting up for the Equestria baking contest being held here in Canterlot. 

Normally it was one of Luna’s favourite celebrations, but this year Celestia was being especially annoying.

Sister, don’t you think you should walk the gardens? Sister, don’t you think you should eat a salad? Oh sister-

If Luna had to listen to Celestia complain one more time about Luna learning to love modern foods while Celestia stuffed herself full of cakes, pastries, pies, and other sweet confections, Luna couldn’t be held responsible for what she did. 

Luna huffed again, stuffing another chocolatey cookie in her mouth, mulling it over. What to do, what to do. What would prove Celestia wrong...Hmm.

While it was true that Luna had gained weight, making her chubby since shortly after her return from banishment, Celestia was no better. Celestia was heavier, but since her weight settled upon her plot and flanks, nopony seemed to mind. Whereas Luna’s chubby belly drew the attention of anypony who looked at it. Luna wasn’t blind, she could see guards, diplomats, random ponies, be charmed by the hypnotic sway of Celestia’s posterior. Whereas Luna's sagging belly earned mostly amusement and muffled whispers about too much cake. 

Then, it struck Luna. An idea so dastardly and exciting that Luna actually dropped her cookie to run through the palace. She had a letter to write. One to a friend and celebrity that would be the perfect judge and would be just the pony to ruffle Celestia’s feathers. 

She would invite Midnight, and invite her to arrive at the palace early. Just to ensure smooth sailing. It would be perfect. Celestia would be over herself trying to endure Midnight’s famous lack of manners, and it was going to be fun to see who would break first. Maybe Luna could take bets with some of the palace staff about it...Celestia’s decorum, or Midnight’s judging sash? 

Luna sent the letter off with a mischievous giggle, going immediately to go inform the event coordinators about the surprise guest. It would be a surprise, but it would only make the event seem more important to have such an important pony judge. Even if she were a little...unconventional. 

(LINE BREAK)

A day before the event started, Midnight arrived at Canterlot. Accompanied by one of Luna’s Night Guards: Gladiolus. Who had delivered the message to Midnight, and was in charge of ensuring that Midnight was properly brought to the castle and had her needs met. 

Before Midnight arrived at the castle proper, she’d been given a tour of Canterlot. Focusing exclusively on the best restaurants and bakeries in town. All on Celestia’s funds. 

She’d been to anywhere that was anywhere. Saddle Row, the high street cafes, the chains of pastry shops that seemed to be on every corner. 

Everywhere Midnight visited, she just about cleared them out. Devouring whole cheesecakes, trays of delectable tarts, dozens of cookies. Nothing was spared: not a cake, croissant, or other sweet pastry that Midnight came upon. 

The mare was hardly mobile, and very sure of herself. As she ate her way across Canterlot, with help from Gladiolus, she only got more sure. Almost as if she were taking the rude comments and stares and turning them into fuel for her appetite. 

Midnight had been clean at the start of the day, but now she was a stained, slobby mess. Slurping down a pudding with hardly a thought, humming to herself and rubbing at her distended gut. 

Gladiolus wasn’t acting the runner between the counter and her chair this time, letting himself stand near her instead. Letting her relax a little bit as he started offering her food rather than have her feed herself. 

All Midnight needed to do was open her mouth, chew, and swallow. Which she did without hesitation. Any pretense of following manners, or other forms of etiquette, was gone whenever somepony saw her. Her face was dotted with sauce and crumbs, her muzzle stained darker from where she ran her tongue across to try to get every morsel she could. She burped, she made a mess of herself and her surroundings, all without caring that other ponies cleared out after she was settled. 

Midnight didn’t care what others thought, in fact that was partly what made her so famous. What mattered was the food: portion size and taste. She was a unique, shocking mare, and that always drew attention, whether it was good or bad. Still, her critiques were well sought after, so her appearance now was met with mixed reactions. Some disgust, some curiosity, a few star-struck ponies that hung around, waiting to see what Midnight thought.

Not that she was necessarily here to rate every restaurant. Maybe she should, once the contest was over. That would prove them right for all their glares and refusing her further service after she’d eaten there for half an hour. The nerve of some of these places, honestly…

Anyway, the service didn’t really matter. What mattered was the food, and it certainly didn’t disappoint. From cafe to cafe, restaurant to restaurant, Gladiolus guided her through the city. Letting her taste a little of every cuisine the melting pot of a city had to offer its residents. 

Midnight was panting, huffing along as she all but crawled her way up to the last restaurant before the palace, which of course was all uphill. Putting on full display how troublesome it could sometimes be for a mare of her size to stay mobile and moving. Even with Gladiolus pushing her stomach from behind to help her shuffle her mass along, it was no easy feat to move her near immobile self around. 

It started with her front legs, reaching up and around her puffy pigeon chest and the foremost rolls of her drooping stomach. While her stomach wasn’t completely grounded, it’s roundness did provide an obstacle for her legs to move around. Planting her front hooves firmly on the ground, she could then work her hind legs into a similar position, though they were harder to manage. Splayed widely to make room for her gargantuan belly, it was harder and harder to get them to connect to the ground. Still, when she made contact, Gladiolus would push against her stomach, giving her hind legs room enough to scrabble forwards, trying to inch herself along. Her front legs did much the same, also working to keep her on course. 

The added difficulty of uphill walking was well noted. By the time they crested the hill, and reached the establishment, both bat ponies were out of breath and drenched in sweat, though Gladiolus was in much better shape than she was. It was a warm summer’s day, and the heavy armour of his uniform certainly didn’t help matters. 

There was no chair at the restaurant that was able to hold her girth, nor could she squeeze herself through the door, but Midnight was content to sit underneath an umbrella, outside the restaurant proper, and observe the outside seating arrangement. 

Under the umbrella, the spring breeze was a balm against her overheated, overworked self. Helping cool her down far quicker than the pitcher of ice water they’d been given. 

Gladiolus seemed better for the rest as well, also seated for once. Still keeping a suspicious eye turned to the public who stopped to gawk or whisper, but able to drink some water at least. 

Midnight didn’t want to think about the struggle it would be to get her into the palace. At least not yet, with her stomach still crying out for food. It was a churning, gurgling mass. One that rarely ever ceased it’s movements completely. 

The service in this place was slow, after the initial rush, but Midnight didn’t mind. Gave her some time to think of the other places she’d visited, make an internal ranking of them thus far for when the contest was over and she would begin to write reviews. 

Still, it wasn’t all that much longer before her noisy stomach got the attention of a server, and her feast began again in earnest. 

By the time the plump bat pony made her way into the castle, it was dinner time. And well past the time to present her to the castle and make introductions. 

Luna sat on her throne with a barely contained grin threatening to spread across her chubby cheeks. She’d set everything up, made sure to pair Midnight up with the one pony who was liable to keep her eating. Made sure she visited the best and richest places to eat in Canterlot. 

There was minimal fanfare when the large double doors opened and revealed the obese bat pony that was Midnight. 

She was large and lardy, not immobile yet by some miracle or another even though her drooping stomach was brushing the floor beneath her. She was wide and flabby, her wings half sunk into her back and barrel fat. Needing to slowly waddle across the floor, clearly reaching hard around her drooping stomach and saggy pigeon chest to be able to move at all. In spite of her enormity, she was smiling. Clearly happy. Eating a few treats even as she made the trek to the dias. 

Luna could see the muscle under Celestia’s left eye twitching in barely contained anger...maybe frustration? Disgust maybe? Luna wasn’t certain but she hadn’t seen this reaction in a long while and it was even harder not to just burst out laughing. 

Gladiolus was a bat pony too, as many of Luna’s guard were, handsome and well rounded. He looked fairly chubby, but it was easy to notice that Gladiolus did work out, keeping himself in fighting condition. He followed along beside and slightly behind Midnight, looking just as pleased as Midnight. 

“Wel-welcome, honoured guest.” Midnight missed Celestia’s hesitancy because she was too busy eating an eclair. 

“Fanks,” Midnight murmured, the sounds muffled by her continued eating. She made no move to bow or grovel. Which Celestia didn’t usually like anyway, but there were manners and decorum for a reason. “Good t’be here.” Her brogue in full force, even as she continued to eat. 

“Yes! Welcome!” Luna was able to smile genuinely here at least. Following Celestia’s lead but able to channel more of her genuine amusement into the motion. “It’s good to see such a renowned figure here for the contest!”

“Yes, it really is.” Celestia mirrored. It was only because Luna knew her sister so well that she was able to tell that Celestia was speaking through clenched teeth. 

Celestia’s eyes were wide, ears pinned back. Watching Midnight eat with the fascination and horror usually reserved for national disasters and carriage accidents. Clearly struggling hard to keep her manners. 

“Good!” Midnight smiled, chocolate smearing against a chubby cheek as she tried and failed to get at the icing with her tongue. 

“It’s so good to see you have such an interest in food.” Celestia said after several beats of awkward silence. Her withers and shoulders were tensing. It was so good to see Celestia so unnerved by something-

“O’ course!” Midnight’s grin grew, and she let out a belch that really was worthy of praise. The force of it blew back Celestia and Luna’s mane, and afterwards Midnight kept eating, not bothering to excuse herself.

The eye twitch was back, but worse. Celestia’s jaw clenching hard as the sound of the belch echoed around the room. 

“If-if you’ll excuse me, I have to meet with an advisor.” Ooh, the guard closest to Celestia winced. Good to know it wasn’t just Luna knowing that Celestia was speaking through gritted teeth. 

Before Midnight, or anypony else, could offer a reply, Celestia spread her wings and flapped a few times. Easily soaring over Midnight and her continued gluttony, before touching down and all but fleeing the room. 

Luna stood, trotting down the stairs to speak with Midnight face to face. “I apologize for my sister, she’s been under a lot of stress organizing this event. Something must have popped up, or she remembered something. Now, Gladiolus?”

“Yes, Princess?”

“Please take Midnight to the guest quarters. And please inform the chefs that whatever food Midnight might want is top priority. This way, Midnight, you can order from the kitchen under my authority. This way they can make whatever you want in whatever quantity you want.”

Midnight paused mid chew, eyes widening, “Really? Well...Okay!” Wheezing gently as she endeavored to turn herself around, intending to follow Gladiolus to the guest suite. 

Luna grinned, watching Midnight trundle along. It was all going according to plan.

(LINE BREAK)

Celestia, later that evening, meandered her way into the palace kitchens for her evening snack. Letting the peace of the late evening seep into her bones, let the stress ease from her body. 

The cacophony from the kitchen was not exactly new, but seeing the chefs actively struggle to make food was. They looked stressed, drenched in sweat, and absolutely worked to the bone. Rushing around the kitchen like she hadn’t seen since the last diplomatic feast.

Celestia artfully dodged out of the way of one of the servants as they rushed by her pushing a groaning cart piled high with food past. Not even pausing to apologize.

Celestia watched for a few more moments in the doorway before entering fully. Now she was inside the kitchen proper, she could see the row of tickets hung up behind the line, one of the chefs rattling off a long list of foods ranging from desserts to full trays of pastas.

“What’s going on?” Celestia asked when the expediter paused for breath. “Who is all this for? Did we have unexpected guests?”

“No, ma’am, it’s for Midnight.” The expediter replied, taking a couple of breaths now he had the chance. “Is there something we can do for you?” Looking rather harried at the thought. 

Celestia cast another critical eye around at the kitchen before shaking her head. No. At this rate, her order wouldn’t be complete for a while yet. And it wouldn’t be fair to put the staff under more pressure. “No. I’ll just...collect a piece of cake and go to bed.” Watching as another food laden cart was pushed out of the kitchen with just as much urgency as the one before. “How much has she ordered?”

“Several of just about everything we have on offer, princess.”

Celestia snorted,  thinking back to the obviously gluttonous mare from earlier. Such poor manners, working her staff like this. And Creators how was Midnight supposed to judge the food tomorrow if she was up all night tonight gorging? However would she taste everything?

With a few swipes of her magic, Celestia took an incoming pile of requests and dumped them into the garbage. Doing the same with what the expediter was trying to organize. “No more. Finish up what you’re working on and go home.”

Action done, Celestia fetched herself a large slice of cake from the fridge, and padded her way upstairs. Leaving her chefs to scramble, trying to play catchup now that they finally had a chance. 

Meanwhile, upstairs from the kitchen, Midnight was continuing to gorge herself on the delectable treats from the kitchen. Gladiolus was helping, ensuring the flabby mare didn’t completely wear herself out trying to move her front legs to eat unassisted. 

The last of the carts was almost finished. The only remaining thing being a tray groaning with a cheesy pasta dish that took up most of the upper level of the cart. The underside was already emptied of the hot and spicy casserole that had been of equal size. 

Honestly, though, Gladiolus wasn’t sure she was going to make it. Midnight had been up since the early hours of the morning before, and now it was rapidly approaching three am. No matter how deep somepony’s stomach might be, they still needed sleep sooner or later. Add that with all the food she’d eaten before arriving to the palace...and well, any other pony would be miles deep into a food coma by now. But not Midnight. 

Midnight was obviously fighting sleep, eyes drooping and slowing down. Still, she was voracious. Opening her sauce stained muzzle, accepting the portion Gladiolus offered, chewing it, and swallowing. Her rippling chins and fat cheeks rubbed together sensuously as she ate. The ripples cascading down to effect the rest of her fat. Little muscle twitches sending waves of movement through her soft, plush body. Putting into perspective how soft she really was. 

Once the last bit of pasta was swallowed, Midnight gave up the fight. Huffing and puffing, her eyes slid shut as she fell into sleep. Her stomach churning and groaning as it fought to digest her massive feast.

Gladiolus stepped away, feeling exhausted yet fulfilled. He would sleep now, while he could. Then he would begin his duties anew, and have the chance to watch Midnight eat all day.

(LINE BREAK)

The next morning dawned cool and cloudy. With a crisp wind that was refreshing more than it was chilly. The perfect sort of day for a contest like this, where those who had chilled desserts didn’t need to worry so much about things melting. 

Gladiolus had woken up earlier than normal to make sure he could help Midnight get to the palace cafeteria for an early breakfast before the contest began. Midnight seemed all the more ravenous for the near endless buffet she’d eaten before finally passing out the night before. 

Even now, she was tired, but she didn’t mind. Her stomach was still sloshing and gurgling about, even as it growled and groaned in hunger. Midnight, who was hardly mobile at the best of times, seemed to be struggling more today. Her stomach was rather firmly planted on the ground now, and that made it all the more difficult to move. It was possible to hear her coming from several meters away with her huffing, puffing, and panting, and sweat dampened her coat, staining it even darker as Gladiolus helped her move.

At the sight of the obese mare approaching, others rapidly filled up their plates. Not sure how much would be left once Midnight was done with it. 

Celestia often preferred to take breakfast in her quarters, or share the morning meal with Luna. Today, however, wasn’t normal, and she had somepony to apologize to. After her little tantrum the night before, she’d laid awake thinking about the harm she might have caused if she hadn’t been able to keep her mouth shut. How un-princesslike of her to act in such a way! Midnight’s feelings might have been hurt, Celestia could have damaged her reputation, chaos could have been sowed! 

So, Celestia ventured into the cafeteria in time to watch Gladiolus fetch plate after plate of food for the seated behemoth of a mare. He had them balanced across his back, and across his wings. He was loaded down like somepony who hadn’t had food in a very long time. 

Celestia stood in the doorway for a few minutes, watching as Gladiolus slipped the plates onto the groaning table and Midnight continued to eat. Not thanking him for getting her more food. She just...went in, mouth chewing and hooves grabbing. Making more of a mess of herself than the night before, if Celestia had thought that possible. 

Celestia swallowed dryly. Still, she was here to apologize. That was what mattered. She made her way over, leaving plenty of space for Gladiolus to continue making deliveries and for employees to clear dirty plates. 

“Good morning Midnight.” Celestia greeted, offering a smile.

“Morning,” She didn’t bother to swallow before speaking. Spitting crumbs across the table as she spoke. 

“I...I have come to apologize for-”

“Great.” Midnight didn’t stop chewing. Her mouth full, she offered a food covered hoof for Celestia to take. 

Celestia did her best to squash down the nausea that suddenly swept her. She’d lived through a number of things over her many lifetimes and this might be the one to break her, “I don’t know if you understand. I’m sorry for how I behaved last night. You...caught me off guard. I’m used to an amount of decorum is all-”

Midnight snorted, hoof still outstretched as she slammed a waffle into her mouth with her other hoof. “S’okay. I’ll be-mff-better for the contest.” Her voice deepened by the amount of grease that was now coating her vocal cords. 

Celestia swallowed dryly, putting her hoof against the food covered one politely, “Yes. Thank you. I appreciate that.”


Midnight shrugged, pulling away to start shoveling more food into her mouth. Her fat shaking and jiggling as she moved.

It took all of Celestia’s self control not to wipe her hoof off on something. Instead padding her way over to the exit so she could leave the sounds of Midnight gorging herself behind her and prepare for the contest later in the afternoon. 

Midnight, meanwhile, didn’t show signs of slowing down. Syrup flecked her chubby cheeks, sticking in between her multitude of chins. Other sauces, primarily ketchup, was staining her muzzle as well. Hot waffles drowning with syrup and butter. Hashbrowns dripping with ketchup and oil. Scrambled eggs, cheesy omelettes stuffed with peppers and mushrooms, roast potatoes swimming in garlic butter, whole rolls with butter and olive oil, grilled cheeses, various sandwiches...all that and more. 

And Midnight barely paused to breathe. Simply focused on more. Getting more food, eating more, tasting more, hardly savouring things but appreciating the mix of flavours gracing her tongue anyway. 

The tables closest to her quickly vacated as she continued to gorge herself. Her stomach churning and gurgling happily as it was fed, making enough of a commotion just by itself much less with Midnight’s eating sounds. 

Gladiolus was running between the serving stations and Midnight’s table while a stream of employees bussed Midnight’s table exclusively, leaving other tables dirty and forgotten while kitchen staff rushed to fill empty platters that Midnight cleared by herself. 

Nothing was safe from her maw. No dish went untasted, and none was completely left alone. Though after thirds and fourths, Midnight went about sticking to what she really wanted and liked. It was cafeteria food, mass made, and even though they were royal chefs preparing the food it still wasn’t the best it could be. But it was enough for Midnight to understand how the buffet worked, how well the chefs worked, and how well the employees here were treated at least. 

If she had more time, she’d have devoured the entire buffet with no hesitation, but she didn’t have all morning. With the contest upcoming, she did need to leave the table still unsatisfied with the whole experience. 

Maybe I’ll stop by tomorrow morning. Midnight mused to herself. Before I go home on the train.

Midnight’s stomach, bloated and groaning away, was painful. But in that pleasant, warm way that signified that she’d eaten a good amount before leaving. She hadn’t gone all out, but that was what the contest was for. Plus it was  amusing to see the staff and other employees watch as Gladiolus had to struggle to push her off the bench so she could stand. 

Joints aching, panting for breath already, Midnight and Gladiolus worked together to drag her massive self to the Royal Gardens where the contest was going to be held.

(LINE BREAK)

Midnight was late. Celestia’s hoof was tapping the table irritably, and there was half the city (and a number of visitors) around to see Celestia express her ire in such a meaningful way. Luna couldn’t help but smile, looking curiously around at the judges and their various covered offerings.

This was a smaller scale, Canterlot based, contest. So entrants from places like Ponyville and Griffonstone wasn’t allowed. Still, all the right ponies from Canterlot had arrived: Donut Joe, Cinnamon Chai, Frosted Cookie, Flawless Caramel, and others that Luna could picture their establishments in her mind, but just couldn’t remember their names. 

Still, they were waiting. At least it was a cool, cloudy day. No chance of rain or anything, but it made the occasional glimpse of sunshine peering through the clouds all the more special. Making the whole garden more atmospheric. 

The chatter and ambient noise suddenly quieted as the double doors that led into the palace opened. Heads swiveled and a few ponies stood so they could see the movement that had captured everyone’s attention. 

Midnight was still vaguely mobile, in spite of all the food she’d been subjecting herself to over the last 48 hours. Gladiolus simply wasn’t enough to keep her moving however, a couple other guards had joined in the valiant effort of helping Midnight along. It was quite a sight. 

Midnight was sweat stained, but clean from her earlier meal. Panting and wheezing along as Gladiolus pushed her stomach from behind, and two other guards pushed her flabby stomach out of the way enough that her legs could reach around the all-encompassing, dragging orb. It was clear that more and more of her stomach was touching the ground all the time. 

She hadn’t shown it, but the constant friction was starting to hurt. Thinning the fur where her stomach met the floor, the skin angry and irritated. It hurt, though the sheer joy her size was giving her far outweighed the discomfort. Having help also helped, made her muscles and joints not ache so fiercely, even though they were all sweaty and panting because of her bulk. 

The whispers and chattering started up again after the crowd watched Midnight and her entourage inch ever closer to the judges table, where Luna and Celestia already were. The seconds and minutes ticked by, with Midnight getting inexorably closer to the table. Now she could smell the desserts, and it helped to spur her on. 

When she finally made it, many of the ponies in attendance clapped. Luna joined in, rather enthusiastically, whereas Celestia all but glowered. She clapped along with the others, but with much less enthusiasm. A muscle under her eye was twitching. 

Celestia, and much of the awaiting crowd, held their breath as Midnight lowered herself onto a specially made bench, designed to hold her bulk. It creaked, it groaned, it sagged under her weight, but it held. The table being shifted over a foot once Midnight’s stomach jostled it, rattling the cutlery and table decorations with the suddenness of it. 

“I’m...here.” Midnight puffed, supremely glad when Gladiolus poured her a glass of water before stepping to the side, slightly behind her. Forming to the guard standard, except for his stomach straining against the straps of his barding. Midnight drank deeply, feeling her heart rate and breathing start to settle. 

“Are we ready to begin?” This really was too good. Celestia had shuffled over a little in order to give Midnight’s stomach more room and she looked so grouchy about it. 

Celestia perked up at Luna’s question, “I’m ready!” Her voice clear and pleasant as always, once again silencing the crowd. 

Midnight nodded. “Me too!”

“I declare the Canterlot Baking Contest open!” Celestia announced, and the crowd cheered. 

Donut Joe was first, not with a Donutopia or anything quite that intricate, but a three layered cake made of nothing but donuts. He was bereft of his normal hat and uniform, wearing what he considered a nice button down shirt for the event. His soft belly pushing the buttons aside, showing off his brown fur from where his chub was threatening escape. He bowed to the royals, as was protocol. “I’m Donut Joe, and I present you this: the donut cake! The donuts are held together by a special icing I made, and it’s topped with caramel and chocolate sauce. There’s a surprise in every bite! All the donuts are flavoured-”

“Sounds good.” Midnight licked her lips eagerly, a grin forcing dimples to form in her fat cheeks. Donut Joe hadn’t opened his store the day before, likely perfecting his cake, and she hadn’t had the chance to eat his donuts fresh before. 

Donut Joe nodded, carving the three judges a generous slice. He knew the cake so well, he managed to make it so he didn’t cut any of the donuts in half.Keeping them whole and preserved. 

The chocolate and caramel sauce were accompanied by real golden flakes, Celestia knew. A fancy ingredient Joe tended to reserve for competitions and charity work. Still, it was always interesting to see him get creative like this, even though this was a little similar to his donutopia. 
Celestia and Luna accepted their slices with their magic, leaving Donut Joe to give the final slice to Midnight. 

Midnight did seem to be trying to keep her manners for once, also using her fork to carve off a generous bite of the cake. Caramel sauce spilling out from where she’d torn a hole into a donut. 

The three mares took a bite, and Celestia immediately ignited her horn to start writing notes on her thoughts and opinion, chewing thoughtfully. She made short work of the slice of cake as she wrote. 

Luna was a little slower, taking a couple bites before beginning to take her notes, still eating while her magic took care of the writing.

Midnight didn’t have that luxury. Her wings rustling against her back, half submerged in the rolls and folds of her barrel. They were flabby too, rarely used. She wolfed down the slice of cake, gesturing for another, picking up her pencil to start scribbling. Not really minding the frosting that she was covering the eraser end of it with. 

Donut Joe hesitated before getting Midnight a second slice, Celestia tensing up and the crowd erupting into whispers again. It was one of Canterlot’s best kept secrets that Celestia loved her sweets, and that it was customary for her to take home the remnants of the contest entries. 

Luna grinned dopily, knowing exactly how excited Celestia got about this. Knowing how much Celestia glutted herself, hiding away in her rooms away from prying eyes and the paparazzi. If there wasn’t much left at the end, if anything...well, it would show Celestia. 

Midnight alternated eating with writing, and even though she was obviously trying to make an effort to be polite for once, old habits died hard. Icing smeared across her muzzle, staining her sagging cheeks. Her papers weren’t spared the onslaught either, crumbs dotting their surface.

It became abundantly clear that Midnight was going to keep eating, regardless of whether Celestia or Luna had stopped. 

Luna cleared her throat, “The donuts are not too sweet, nor is your icing. The flavours within the donuts, while surprising, all seem to compliment each other as well as the toppings.”

Celestia nodded along, “You’re always a popular entrant in these competitions, and while whatever you do bring us is different from your usual fare, I do recommend trying to be more creative in the future. This is not a new idea, though you’ve never made a donut cake before. It is delicious, yet fairly simple.”

“‘S good.” Midnight managed about a mouthful, all but slurping down another slice of cake. Leaving less than half of it behind once Donut Joe wheeled it away.

Cinnamon Chai was next. She owned a rather large cafe that was always a hit with whoever went there. Offering an ever changing assortment of sweet treats, sandwiches, and soups. She also ran a small catering business, based out of her cafe. Catering her sweet treats all across Canterlot and the surrounding area for all sorts of events ranging from weddings to birthday parties. 

She was a tall, regal unicorn of obvious aristocratic descent, sharing the tall legs and slender, delicate features of the Canterlot elite. Still, she was older now, having been a fixture in Canterlot’s Market for over fifteen years. Her age was showing in her softer appearance, extra weight creeping on as the years went by. Giving her a smooth appearance, one that was soft and kind, and fit her personality perfectly. 

Cinnamon was dressed up for the event, her dark brown mane piled behind her head in an elegant twist, and wearing one of Rarity’s Canterlot Inspired dresses. One that was altered for her personally, unlike Donut Joe’s ill-fitting shirt. 

“Hello, judges.” Cinnamon bowed, grinning. “Today I present to you an old classic dessert! One of my famous Solar Citrus Cheesecakes.” This got the crowd in a flutter, Cinnamon had pulled the dessert from her menu years ago and had never brought it back, in spite of its popularity. 

Celestia looked floored, swallowing convulsively as her mouth began to water. She’d had dreams about this cheesecake-

“It is made with a sweet lemon, with an orange glaze topping. Modeled into Princess Celestia’s Cutie Mark for this event.” The graham cracker crust was the perfect offset to the white cheesecake, dotted with vibrant yellow from the lemon, with the dark orange glaze in the center, with a yellow lemon glaze forming the rest of the picture of the sun.

“Of course.” Luna hadn’t been around when Cinnamon had had this dessert, but she’d heard enough stories to be deeply intrigued, her own mouth watering in anticipation.

Midnight beamed as her slice was brought to her, Celestia and Luna grabbing theirs with their magic as before. Years ago, she’d reviewed this dessert item, one of her first reviews, and Cinnamon was still thankful for all the good press. 

Cinnamon winked as she set the plate down, and Midnight forgoed manners all together to dive right in, gobbling the sweet and sour dessert up in moments. Not that Cinnamon was surprised, there was already another slice waiting for Midnight. 

Celestia was so enraptured by her slice that she forgoed writing notes completely, making contented noises in the back of her throat as she went along, happily eating the dessert. 

Luna couldn’t complain, though, she wasn’t much better. After years of having Celestia and others rave about this dessert, it was amazing to find it met and beat all of her preconceived notions about it. It wasn’t too sweet, wasn’t too sour. The candied lemon provided nice texture, and the glazes were perfect while not being overpowering. 

Celestia and Luna each got a second piece while Midnight devoured her fourth and fifth slices, demolishing the cheesecake in a matter of moments.

Celestia, for one, didn’t seem to be focusing much on Midnight, “That was...incredible, as always. Thank you.”

“We’ve heard much talk of this dessert, and we must say it has met and surpassed our wildest expectations!”

“The crust could be crunchier,” Midnight said, spraying crumbs across the table, “But it’s still as delicious as it always was.”

Cinnamon nodded, bowing again, taking the empty cart with her as she sauntered away. 

As the judges regained their composure and took notes, the next contestant got ready. Another cheesecake, a new recipe to the owner as far as Midnight knew. A ‘Lunar Dessert Pie’: it was filled with a sweet cheese and blueberry filling. She thought it a little too tart, but it was still a textural journey for her tastebuds so of course she ate all of it, except for the two slices meant for Celestia and Luna.

As the contest continued, Midnight’s manners grew worse. Abandoning the fork all together, the only reason she didn’t get all of any one of the many desserts that began to stream and blur together was because she was behind a table and helpless to serve herself. Her belly bloated outwards as it was fed, shifting the table even more as the desserts kept coming. 

Everfree Forest Gateaux, Pineapple Upside-down Syrup Cake, Monkey Bread, Red Velvet Cake, eclairs, an entire Croquembouche, nothing was spared the depths of Midnight’s ravenous gullet. Much to Celestia’s obvious dismay. 

Even Gladiolus’ reminders weren’t enough for Midnight to keep her manners. Whispered utterances that were lost upon the crowd was also missed by Midnight most of the time, she was so focused on the food. Celestia’s body was tense, even as she too started to quietly reprimand Midnight for her lack of manners. 

Flawless Caramel was a high street, well known baker who specialized in specialty, to order cakes for all occasions. She was mostly known for her wedding cakes, and that was what made up most of her business. She didn’t often have the time or gumption to enter these kinds of competitions, but she always made her talents known when she did. Her cakes were always so good-

Midnight was already licking her lips, wiggling her hips a bit in excitement. The bench under her creaked alarmingly under her weight at the movement, though Midnight seemed not to notice that as well. 

“Hello judges.” Flawless Caramel’s grin was wide and natural. She was a pegasus, making her talent in the kitchen and bakehouse all the more commendable. Her rich, caramel-coloured coat and white mane and tail were a stark contrast to the cake she wheeled to the judges table. 

It was huge. Five tiered, clearly meant to feed a great many ponies. The cake was split roughly into two halves, one black as night and depicting the nighttime sky, and the other a soft blue, depicting the bright daytime sky. 

There were edible sugar crystals on both sides, accompanied with a special topper that looked like the figures on the Equestrian flag. It was arguably one of the most beautiful cakes Celestia, Luna, or Midnight had ever seen. The little details kept jumping out the more someone stared, and there were a number of them. Little songbirds, tiny stars and nebulae, the occasional cloud. They were innumerable as they were delicious. 

Flawless Caramel bowed to the royals, carving them both slices. “This is a multi-tiered cake, made with ten different flavours. Each tier, and each half of each tier, is a different flavour to better show off the two halves of the cake. This flavour is chocolate cake, paired with mocha buttercream frosting.” Taken from the half that suited Luna.

At the mention of mocha, Luna had to take a couple of deep breaths to keep herself from flying out of her chair and escaping with the entire cake for herself. It would be unprofessional. And besides, it was Midnight that was supposed to drive Celestia to distraction, not Luna herself. Otherwise, what had been the whole point of inviting Midnight along for the ride? 

“It sounds delicious. What are the other flavours?” Luna asked. Eagerly digging in as she awaited her answer, already scribbling on her notes excitedly as the flavours danced along her tongue. 

“Aside from the chocolate mocha, we have raspberry with white chocolate, a mango upside-down cake, cocoa cake with marshmallow filling, hazelnut almond with a fudgy frosting, ginger spice cake with maple frosting, peanut butter cake with a whipped peanut butter and chocolate frosting, death-by-chocolate, caramel apple cake with brown sugar mousse, and a lemon-thyme cake. It’s a new recipe that alternates layers of lemon curd with vanilla buttercream.”

Flawless Caramel was already handing the last piece of the mocha over to Midnight as she finished her explanation. Not batting an eye at the spectacle that was Midnight. Flawless had worked in the food industry long enough to be well acquainted with Midnight’s eccentricities. 

Celestia ate her piece slowly, apparently doing her best to ignore Midnight for the moment. Trying to remain professional, even as the muscle under her eye continued to tick away. “This is delicious. I’ve said before how mocha isn’t a cake flavour I’m often fond of, but you never fail to change my mind with your recipe. Knowing your work as well as I do, I’m certain the other flavours are just as delicious-”

Midnight burped-no Midnight belched. Long and loud, with enough force that the centerpiece’s leaves fluttered. It cut Celestia off completely, making all the ponies stop and stare at Midnight.

“I’ll need to taste the other flavours.” Midnight said simply. 

“Of course.” Flawless set about cutting up the rest of the cake, resting the plates and slices along her wings and back so she could carry them all at once. 

“As I was saying.” Celestia’s voice was taut, and a vein was throbbing in her temple, rather visible from where Midnight was sitting, should the portly mare deign to look. “Your recipes are the highest caliber, with all the flavours mixing properly. Enough you can taste them all, and savour them all, but not so overpowering you forget you’re eating chocolate cake with mocha icing.”

“For me, I could have used more mocha flavour.” Luna rebuffed, “But that’s me. I like my coffee strong enough I can’t taste much else for most of the morning.” This got some laughter, and even Flawless’s smile turned into more of a grin. “But my sister is right, the balance here is perfect. There have been many cakes since my return, and a number of them have been too sweet for me, or have one flavour or another too overpowering. If your other flavours are this well balanced, you’ve outdone yourself.”

“‘S good.” Midnight managed around a mouthful of cake, from where she was partially flopped over her own stomach, muzzle deep in one of Flawless’ generous slices. Ignoring Gladiolus, who was trying to whisper something into her ear, completely as she ate. “Very good. Lemon thyme is very original and even though both can be overpowering flavours, you’ve made it so they play nice.”

Celestia stared at the remnants of the cake, eyes going in between Midnight and the rapidly disappearing cake as Flawless continued to cut slices off of it and bring it to the table so Midnight could eat them.

At this point, Gladiolus took a step back, with an audible sigh. Recognizing the signs of a battle lost. At least he’d tried. Though, from where he was standing, he could see the state of Midnight’s notes. She was thorough in between contestants, having her own shorthand system to speed the process along. Still, it didn’t protect them from the deluge of crumbs or smears of frosting and toppings that decorated the pages more than the official letterhead did.

Celestia cleared her throat, rather sharply, hoping to catch everypony’s attention, but Midnight ignored her. “Since you’re the last contestant, Flawless Caramel, it’s time for the judges to deliberate. If everypony could go enjoy the garden and free refreshments, we’ll ring the bell when we’re ready to announce the winner.”

There were nods and murmurings as the crowd began to disperse. Flawless stayed behind long enough to put the last of the cake on the table before Midnight. 

Celestia huffed, spinning around to Midnight with no small amount of frustration and anger, now that they were mostly alone to discuss the contest, “How much more unprofessional can you be?” Voice sharp, unlike her usual endless patience completely.

“What?” Midnight asked, barely looking up from her cake. “Been doing what I’m supposed to.” She slid her filthy notes over to Celestia to look at.

“How am I supposed to read these?” Celestia demanded, nose wrinkling in disgust. “How can anypony read and understand these? I’ve shown you endless patience-” She cut herself off, taking a few shaking breaths, clearly trying to keep herself under control. 

“Can I get a new sheet?” Midnight asked, almost apologetically. Though Luna could see a glint of humour and mischief in the obese mare’s eyes that made Luna stamp down a grin in kind.

Celestia nodded, levitating one over. The tension starting to drain little by little from her body at the ‘win’ against Midnight’s appalling manners and infuriating slobbishness. 

Midnight looked to Gladiolus, who stepped forward and took a fresh pencil into his mouth, poised to write. 

Haltingly, since she was eating still, Midnight began to speak. “Flawless Caramel’s entry is first in my rankings. The creativity and execution of her ideas were flawless and excellently put together. There’s nothing in this cake that is a bad flavour, and her icing and frosting pairings couldn’t be more perfect if I’d selected them myself.”

As Midnight spoke, Luna used her magic to pluck the ruined sheets of paper from the table, eyeing them closely. Starting to use magic in the hopes of restoring the pages to some form of legibility. 

Gladiolus scribbled away in the meantime, while Celestia looked suddenly a little nervous.

“Next would be Cinnamon Chai. It’s a good, classic Canterlot dessert that others have been trying to recreate for years. Today made it all the more poignant that she’s the original creator. Others have managed to piece it together, but she made it into an artform first and it shows.” Midnight burped again, wiping a hoof across her flabby face and smearing frosting as she went. 

“And third is Frosted Cookie. His croquembouche was the best one I’ve ever had.” Midnight leaned back, rubbing at her gurgling, churning gut with a grimace. “It was creamy and delectable. The caramel wasn’t too sweet, the cream not too heavy. The pastry was perfect with all the layers there should be. It was excellent. If it weren’t for Flawless, he’d have taken first place. From me anyway.”

“What about the others?”

“There were a lot of others. The elderly mare with the...oh what did she call it? Lunar dessert? That was good too, but a bit heavy and rich, even for me.” Midnight shrugged, “All of them are good, but we’re looking for the best, right?”

Celestia looked dumbfounded, nodding. 

“You know, her original sheets say much the same, though she talks about all the entries.” The spells worked, making Midnight’s writing legible once again. Luna flipping through the pages idly, “I agree with her ranking though.”

Celestia let out a long suffering sigh, head drooping a little. In spite of appalling lack of manners, it was evident Midnight knew what she was speaking of. “My rankings are the same, actually.”

Midnight brightened cheerfully. “Excellent. Should we call the others back?”

Celestia’s horn forlornly lit up, and rang the small bell a few times. Looking surprisingly somber as she looked around at the empty pavilion with equally empty cake stands. 

Midnight’s stomach continued to churn away at the last of the cake she’d eaten. Rubbing at it as the onslaught of calories started to catch up with the portly mare. Her eyes and body heavy as her blood rushed to her stomach so it could get to work digesting the feast of sweet desserts. 

It took some time for everypony to return, the contestants standing near their empty carts. A few of the more recent entrants fidgeting restlessly, while the seasoned veterans waited patiently. Except for Donut Joe, he looked uncomfortable. Tugging awkwardly at his ill fitting shirt. 

Once things seemed to settle, Celestia pushed herself away from the table. Even though she had no leftovers to speak of, her stomach was rock hard and bloated, making her movements stiff and awkward. She rubbed at her distended tummy with a slight grimace, before her normal smile took over. “The judges are unanimous! First place goes to Flawless Caramel of Flawless’ Cake Orders!” 

There was cheering, and Flawless looked rather like a cat that had managed to catch the canary: far too pleased with herself. She bowed to the judges. 

Celestia waited for the applause to die down before clearing her throat, “Second place is Cinnamon Chai of her Tea and Cake shop!” 

The applause was almost more thunderous this time, Cinnamon Chai’s shop well well-known and well-loved by tourists and locals alike. She grinned wildly, inclining her head and winking at Midnight. Midnight couldn’t help but wink back, even as her stomach gurgled loudly enough to divert some of the crowd’s attention. 

Celestia once more waited for the noise to die down, the muscle under her eye starting to twitch again once it was clear Midnight’s stomach wasn’t going to quiet. 

“And, in third place, we have Frosted Cookie, from his new fine-dining restaurant on Saddle Row! The Porch and Pint, if I remember correctly!”


The cheering was a little less robust this time, but it was still there. Especially loud from a few ponies who looked to be relatives. He looked very pleased with himself, beaming wildly. Almost bouncing in place with how happy he was. 

“Now, everypony else did a fabulous job! All of the desserts were incredibly tasty, and I’d recommend everyone try everything we had today!” Celestia smiled across the crowd. She’d have to order sweet treats for herself, since she was sorely lacking any leftovers for herself. “Thank you so much to the organizers of the event and-” her voice hitched- “to our guest judge, Midnight!”

There was more applause with that, and Celestia sunk back into her chair, content to watch her little ponies start to get their things together and leave. The awards would be sent to the respective ponies by the end of the day, so they knew not to wait for it. 

Normally Celestia would be dreaming about all the food she’d be eating that night, and even though her stomach was stretched taut and painful from all the desserts she’d already consumed, it stung to know she’d be bereft of them.

Once the place was mostly clear, Gladiolus motioned to the guards that had been in place for the event. Almost reluctantly, they got closer. Gladiolus talked with them for a few minutes, words rushed and quiet. 

It didn’t take long before it became abundantly clear that they would need to help Midnight get back into the palace. It would take time, and a lot of effort from all of them, but it didn’t take long before they had her upright and had her slowly shuffling her firmly grounded gut back towards the double doors. 

Celestia sighed, igniting her horn to start the sunset. Unable to look at Midnight’s extreme lack of independent mobility.

Luna leaned in, a grin on her face, “Do you still think I have to work on my diet sister?”
> Canterlot Crawl
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

It had been bound to happen sooner or later. Midnight thought as she rolled her shoulders, sending ripples across her fat body. To eat so much, exercise so little, immobility was something she’d been contending with for months, years even.

After helping Princess Luna and Princess Celestia judge the baking contest...well, Midnight wasn’t surprised. She’d gorged herself on all the fatty goods that Canterlot had to offer, then the cakes, and the buffet, and the food service of the palace itself. She’d hardly been mobile before this new wave of gluttony and had only really been mobile through the help of others.

Now, it seemed, the inevitable had happened. After spending most of the day before in a deep food coma, she’d tried to roll out of bed only to find she didn’t have the strength to get out of bed. No matter how she moved, her gelatinous stomach was in the way between her hooves and anything else, meaning she’d finally trapped herself in a fatty prison of her own making.

Honestly, Midnight didn’t mind it so much, either. She’d known it was coming. Hell, the whole nation had been speculating on her mobility for ages! Wondering when she’d finally trap herself in place.

Midnight’s stomach grumbled as a pang of hunger shot through her, right through to her spine. She heaved a sigh, rubbing at the portion of her stomach she could still reach, hoping to soothe it.  Just a little longer. 

At least Luna had thought of this. Which was fortunate, considering the circumstances. And now there was what felt like a platoon of guards, and the Princess of the Night herself, all standing in the bedroom Midnight had been using since she got to the palace.

Some impromptu ceremony, and all Midnight could think about was food. Even over the portly Princess’s chattering. It was even funnier considering Midnight's growling stomach. It was...undercutting the importance of Luna's speech.

“And so, as a thank you for your services, we have two gifts for you.” Luna grinned, dimples appearing in her chubby cheeks. 

The double doors into the room opened, and another guard entered. A unicorn, pushing a lovely, custom made cart into the room with his magic. 

It was plush, reinforced, and huge. Made to be pulled along like a normal cart, or propelled by magic. Sturdy, filled with cushions and padding to soften the hard wood and steel of the rest of it. 

“It is large enough to fit you comfortably!” Luna seemed rather proud about that, almost bragging. She leaned in towards Midnight conspiratorially, “Though, we don’t think that’ll last too long.” Winking at Midnight, earning a snort of laughter from the bat pony. “And you have a team of royal guards to pull you along for the day. It is my great joy to also mention that you have the ability to go spend the day in town and indulge.” Luna’s eyes sparkled as joy filled Midnight at the promise.

“Thank you, Princess!” Midnight smiled, dipping her head in the best approximation of a bow that she could manage at such a size. “This means a lot. Thank you.” At least, with a cart, she wasn’t just stuck in one place. Though, she’d need a unicorn or team of ponies to transport her places now. Still, with the day guaranteed in Canterlot, Midnight had time to mull it over. 

A pony pulled out a trumpet from somewhere, blowing into it to produce a loud, clear note that overtook the sounds of Midnight’s stomach growling for hunger. 

“It is our duty to ensure our ponies’ safety and comfort.” Luna returned with a smile. “We will leave you to it. Please try not to bankrupt the palace.” Waddling her way out of the room, some of the guards following after with all the appropriate fanfare.

Leaving Midnight with a group of strangers. Great. Her stomach was still growling hungrily, demanding attention and making her feel poorly. A mare her size needed to eat!

“So, uh. How are we doing this? I can’t get on there by myself.” 

“It’s alright, Miss Midnight.” One of the guards rumbled. A unicorn. As were a few of the others. “If you’ll relax, we’ll levitate you into the cart.”


“Thanks!” Midnight beamed. Doing her best to relax while the unicorns worked in tandem to lift her from the bed and settle her into the cart. It was hard work, she could tell, so she did her best not to move or shift. Even as her skin itched at the foreign magic moving her.

The cart was as soft and comfortable as it looked, and Midnight couldn’t help but breathe a sigh of relief as she was settled into it. Even as her stomach screamed for sustenance underneath her.

The unicorns took their time hitching themselves up to the cart, testing Midnight’s patience, but she bit her tongue and waited. Watching as they wiped the sweat from their brows. Lifting her would be difficult enough, much less moving her and then needing to pull her around town.

Besides. This gave her time to figure out what it was she wanted. Gladiolus had taken her to the cafes and bakeries around Canterlot. And she had the feeling that if she showed up again so soon they might kick her out. Where to go...where to go…

Then an idea hit her. Canterlot was a center of the arts, of all sorts. Elite ponies came from all over Equestria to sample the delicious foods located in the city, but the real experts came for the master breweries that Canterlot boasted.

It was mid-morning now, and Midnight figured by the time they made their way out of the palace it’d be closer to noon than not. And she wouldn’t just be drinking, she’d be eating too. Which would help.

“Could you take me to the nearest pub please?” She asked as the guards pulled her out of her room and into the spacious corridors beyond. There were four of them, and managed to pull her along rather well. Trotting easily along the flat tiles of the palace.

“Of course ma’am!” The front one said, “I’m Gauntlet, ma’am. And this is Viridian, Ace, and Steel. Just tell us where you want to go, and we’ll be happy to take you there.”

“Nice to meet you all. I uh, just hope you’re ready for a real crawl across Canterlot.” Midnight relaxed, sinking into her own fat with a contented sigh. Happy that she didn’t need to exhaust herself through movement anymore.

Silence settled across them as they moved out of the palace.

(LINE BREAK)

As it turned out, the closest pub wasn’t that far away at all. Actually, it was suspiciously close to where Midnight knew the barracks were. She wasn’t going to judge though, everypony needed to blow off steam sometimes.

The Crossed Spears was a quaint, Griffish style pub. It even looked like an older Griffon building, with the white panels between dark wooden supports. It was nice, and thankfully, had a huge door with a ramp. At least getting inside wasn’t going to be a problem.

The pub was empty, probably because of the early hour, with only a few employees puttering around. As Midnight was brought to a table, the place livened up quickly. Once again, her large size and reputation had preceded her. Not that that was a bad thing.

She ordered pitchers of their finest beer, an entire bottle of wine, and one of every entre on the menu to start. Along with some appetizers, in the hopes that they would arrive before the bulk of the food so she wouldn’t be drinking on a completely empty stomach for long.

The drinks were brought forth, leaving her guards to stand off to one side almost awkwardly. At least they’d be getting a show.

Midnight didn’t wait to start drinking. Slurping the alcohol straight from the pitcher, it burned its way down her throat but it was so nice. Chilled and delicious, with a deep flavour she’d grown to love over the years. 

The pitchers of beer went down a treat. Stretching out her stomach as it gurgled and growled, still demanding heartier fare than alcohol.

Thankfully, the first wave of appetizers arrived shortly thereafter. Fried, crispy perogies served with sour cream and fried onions. Thick mozzarella sticks that oozed cheese the moment Midnight bit into them. Onion rings, lattice fries, breaded mushrooms, potato skins, and breaded pickles soon took up all the space on the table. 

Midnight dove into the food like a mare starving.  Waving for more drink as she tore through the greasy, delectable food. Part of her itched for her notebook, but she’d forgotten it in her rooms. But this was fine, this was for fun. Not an official critiquing. 

Midnight belched loudly enough to make the cutlery rattle on the table, but didn’t let that stop her. Pushing forward as she was plied with more drinks and more food. Coming wave after wave. The service really was impeccable, maybe she’d come back and write a proper review one day…

Once the appetizers were cleared, the rest started appearing. Tall sandwiches, fish and chips, all sorts of different burgers, grilled fish rather than fried, thick vegetable pies. Each was better than the last. Bloating Midnight’s stomach along with the alcohol, making her stomach groan and grumble as it started to try digesting the onslaught of calories.

Midnight happily drank her way through the selection of wines and beer they had while tasting everything she could on the menu. Not aiming to clear the restaurant out completely, she wanted to save room for the other places she intended to go, but to get a good feel for what this restaurant was about.

And boy were they meeting and exceeding all her expectations. They even made their own tortilla chips for the nachos!

By the time the last bite of food had been swallowed, and the last pint had disappeared down her gullet, Midnight was a belching, bloated mess. Crumbs dotted her face and poofing pigeon chest, and her hooves were smeared with various sauces. But she was sated. Not satiated, not full, but content.

“Thank you!” She waved to the staff as she was pulled out of the pub, belching once more and sighing at the release of pressure. “Looking for good spots to drink and eat, boys!”

Already the food and booze were having a visible effect on her body. Bloating her stomach out to push her fat further against the sides of the cart, leaving her feeling a bit pinched. But that was fine. Nothing to worry about.

Part of her couldn’t help but wonder if she could break the cart. Would the Princesses buy her another? Or would Celestia kick her to the curb without any help for her poor manners? Midnight snorted a chuckle, grinning to the guards when they turned to look at her questioningly.

The next place was a good Mexicolt place. Serving tapas and platters, and spicy cocktails that Midnight quickly acquired a taste for. The food was refreshing and different, not so fatty or greasy as the pub fare. 

The alcohol and food were collecting in her stomach, bloating her ever outward. Especially when the guards presented them with the note from Princess Luna. Letting her gorge herself silly on all the delicious foods available. Even with the belching releasing some tension and pressure, it was still too much. Her bloated stomach rounding ever outward and upward, lifting her more into the air with each bite she practically inhaled. 

The next spot was a fancy brunch buffet. With sweet, bubbling champagne and some of the freshest seafood in the city. Lobster waffles. Whoever the genius was who thought that up should earn some sort of prize. A crispy, rich potato waffle with fresh hunks of a lobster sauce on top? Excellent. Better than she could have anticipated.

And the seafood was as good as she’d heard. Jumbo shrimp, grilled fish, roasted fish, crab, lobster, oysters, and more. Everything was fresh and delectable and Midnight couldn’t help but wolf it down with the same eagerness she’d shown elsewhere. Crumbs littering the rolls of her fact, neck, and  chest. Sauce smeared across her lips and chubby cheeks. She didn’t even pay it any mind.

Nevermind the pastries they had on offer! Made by a team of specialists, just like everything at this buffet, they were amazing. Not the main focus, but Midnight did her best to make a mental note to come back for a review. They deserved it for letting her plow through their buffet line.

The champagne was sweet and bubbly, and remarkably smooth. It paired suspiciously well with everything Midnight was eating, and was as delicious and well made as everything else.

By the time she finished at the buffet, she was noticeably spilling from the cart. Her flab being pushed up and over the sides, her stomach overhanging the edges and being pulled ever downward by gravity.

The guards, though they were strong and capable, were struggling too. Pulling, straining against the cart to keep moving forward. The tack creaking and jingling more than it had at the start of the day. Her fat was being jostled around, not helping to quiet her belches or rumbling tummy.

“Y’know, this is just fantastic!” Midnight was feeling the effects of the alcohol now, burping wildly and not caring that she had crab juice in her mane. “The foods’ good, company’s good, and this cart’s good.” Belching loudly enough to garner some looks from ponies who had been trying to ignore her corpulent form as the guards struggled to pull her uphill towards the next stop.

Gauntlet, or was it one of the others? She couldn’t remember. Gauntlet dug his hooves against the cobblestone, muscles straining under his armour. Face red and cheeks puffed out with exertion. 

“Come on!” Midnight pouted, turning her attention to some of the ponies who just had to stop and stare. “I’ve got a-a beautiful figure! The envy of the nation!” Belching again, and grimacing at it. Swallowing down a sudden nausea. “Ooph.”

The guards were making progress though, even as they tired. Though it had looked a bit dicey before they crested the hill, the four managed it. Pausing at the top to catch their breath and let Midnight ramble to whomever she could.

“-look hungry, you should join us! I’ve got a note from the Princess and everything!” Midnight hiccuped, wincing at the pain of it. “Oh no, not hiccups. Do you guys know about a cure for hiccups?”

“No...ma’am.” Vase? Vauz? Midnight could swear it was ‘ace’ something panted out. 

“Well damn.” Midnight pouted, huffing. Then she sniffed, raising her head to sniff at the air. “Mmmm. You smell that? Smells greasy.”

“That’d be the BuckDonald’s down the road.” One of the others said. She genuinely couldn’t remember his name. He hadn’t spoken a single word since they’d gotten started an looked rather glum now.

“Oh I’d kill a stallion for some fries.” Midnight huffed. “Take me there! Please? I’ll buy you milkshakes?”

One of them muttered something she couldn’t quite hear, and received a swift kick to the side for it. Nothing meant to damage or anything, just a sharp reprimand.

“Oh you’re in trouble!” Midnight giggled teasingly.

They started off again. The going was easier this time, and the streets less crowded. Leaving Midnight to hiccup and belch contentedly as her mind wandered. The thick smell of fryer oil grew denser as they drew closer, which made Midnight’s stomach growl all the louder. Drawing a few looks of those passersby who hadn’t been chased off by the noise.

“‘S my stomach!” Midnight gave what she could reach a reassuring pat. “It’s hungry! I’m hungry!”

“We’re almost there.” Gauntlet managed, voice strained.

And soon enough, they were. The restaurant was like others in its franchise, fairly plain looking but with rather large signs up in the windows and on the roof to garner attention to it. Thankfully, the doors were double wide. So there should be plenty of room-

Only, Midnight’s stomach got caught in the frame. Her sides pinching painfully at being so thoroughly wedged. Her stomach cried out for sustenance, loudly demanding it even though she was thoroughly wedged. “Ow! I’m stuck! No, no no no! Don’t back out, I’m still hungry-”

“We can get you food while you’re outside.” Gauntlet sighed, directing them into backing up anyway. And igniting his magic and trying to squish Midnight’s fat out of the way with sheer force of will.

Midnight pouted. “But I need to see the menu.” Belching at her stomach being squeezed into different shapes.

“We have copies!” An astonished employee yelled from behind the counter. “We can give you one to look at outside.”

“Oh! Okay-” Another belch escaped her, and Midnight relaxed as they somehow got her back outside. Her sides hurt, and it felt good to not be so pinched, but still. She wanted to go inside! Stupid places, not catering to a mare of her size.

Thankfully, once they got her settled on the patio outside, an employee came out with a tall pitcher of water and the promised menu. Leaving the water for the guards, and menu with Midnight, she waited for a while while Midnight perused. Midnight was eager, her mouth salivating and stomach all but screaming to be fed. Drawing more than a few looks for the noise it was generating.

She couldn’t make up her mind. So of course, the immobile mare decided on the entire menu. As well as whatever the guards wanted. Because they’d been so nice to her all this time, and it’d been hours and they hadn’t eaten anything! It was ridiculous!

BuckDonald’s didn’t have alcohol, but that was okay. Midnight, more than anything, really craved the heavy grease and taste of the fast food. Hayburgers, salty fries, those weird apple pie things they had, fish. More fries. Piles and piles of them.

The salt was bloating her too, along with heavy doses of soda. It kept Midnight from talking, leaving the guards to peck at the food they’d ordered while Midnight loudly set about devouring everything the restaurant had to offer. Her flabby sides eclipsing the cart more and more, and even her rear having to jockey for space when her stomach was growing noticeably over time.

The ice cream, soft and sweet without being too heavy, was the perfect end to the feast before her.

Her stomach was still soft and flabby. Rolls cascading from her fat barrel to roll over the hard edges of the cart and hang down. It gurgled and churned beneath her, audibly working to try to digest the deluge of calories it had been filled with.

By the time they left the restaurant, Midnight was feeling a little better. But more determined than ever to find a good place with a lot of alcohol.

Their destination was another pub, before they’d been waylaid by BuckDonald’s. “Pub please!”

Slowly, they got back on track. Winding through the streets of Canterlot once more. Slowly, but surely, drawing attention. Mostly because of Midnight. She was well known in certain circles, and her massive frame always drew curious stares. Now more than before.

Not that it bothered Midnight. She waved and chatted with those who approached, oinked and snorted at those who looked disgusted at her display. Reveling in herself, being herself, completely oblivious to the poor guards as they did their best to keep her moving.

Finally, they made their way into the pub. And once again Midnight was grateful for extra wide doorways and no stairs.

It was later in the day now. Some snobs would say too early for drinking still, but what did they know. A smattering of patrons were around. A few at the bar, a few seated and eating, and all of them turned to look at Midnight.

“Welcome!” The bartender beamed. It was a strained smile, once more Midnight’s reputation preceded her, but he was trying. “Welcome to the Healthy Brewer! I’m the owner of this fine establishment. Friends call me Bottle. What can I do you for?”

“I am looking for great food and better booze. Mostly just booze, if I’m being honest.” Midnight sighed. “And a lot of it.”

“Didn’t you say you got that shipment from Sweet Apple Acres?” One of the customers at the bar asked, words slurring a little and leaning against the counter. “Cider, right?”

“Oh cider would be so good!” Midnight beamed, dimples forming in her fat cheeks. “How much do you have?”

“Well, it’s a tun, the largest keg available.” Bottle blinked, licking suddenly dry lips. “Can I ask how you’re going to pay? Or...can you even drink that much?”

Gauntlet presented the note while Midnight shrugged. The motion sent waves of fat rippling across her form, making her jiggle and wiggle. “Not sure, but I want to try.”

Bottle looked a little dazed, hoofing the note back over with a nod. “Um. Alright then. It’s the finest stock, best year I’ve ever tasted. You’re sure? Once I crack a keg open, it’s gotta be drunk quick.”

“I’m sure.” Midnight was steadfast. “It’ll be fine.”

“Hell, I’ll help pay her tab if she can manage it!” A mare called out. The other patrons murmuring in agreement.

“Alright. Get yourself settled, I’ll be back.” Bottle disappeared into a back room, leaving the guards to get Midnight settled while they waited.

The keg was large, but Bottle owned a special trolley to help move them around. Doing what he could to maneuver it into the dining room proper. He pulled out a hose, attached it to the spigot, and used his magic to shove the keg to a little used area of the pub. Holding the other end of the hose out to Midnight to take into her mouth. “Ready?”

Midnight nodded, almost vibrating with excitement at the prospect. How much bigger could this make her? Would she crush the cart? How much more would this stretch her stomach? She was already a bottomless pit, what could a whole ton of alcohol do? Would she get sick?

Before she could really attempt to tackle any of these questions, Bottle turned the tap and the cider started to flow. It was sweet, crisp. Sweet Celestia, it was basically juice. She could drink this for forever and not notice it was alcoholic.

“Woo!” A chorus of cheers started up, some more drunk than others. “You can do this!”

Bottle went back behind the bar to continue cleaning. Waiting for Midnight to finish or give up.

The first leg went down a treat, the cider really was delicious,  meaning Midnight could pack away quite a lot. The cheering was growing louder and louder, drawing more of a crowd. The pub quickly became packed, with a hat being passed around for them to add money into to help pay for the exorbitant amount of alcohol. 

Already bloated and full from the rest of her day of gorging, Midnight was really starting to feel the effects of the drink now. Visibly bloating up with every mouthful she managed to suck down. Her flabby sides were smoothing out, growing taut and round like a ball. Smoothing out her rolls and lifting her legs further and further from the floor of the cart. Pushing her flab from the cart even more than before. Even her wings were pushed up and out, free from the rolls that usually entrapped them against her sides.

It hurt now, too. Her stomach was aching. A deep, stabbing pain that flared with every mouthful of the delectable cider that she managed to put away. It felt almost endless, an impossible challenge, but the cheering helped.

“She’ll never do it!” One pony shouted, out of sight. “She’s slowing down! She’ll never make it!”

There were a few boos at the outburst. “No way, it’s Midnight, she beat Caramel in a pie eating contest, she’s got this beat for sure!”

“I saw her at that tapas place on Main Street earlier, she’s not doing this on an empty stomach, I’m not sure-”

“If anyone can do it, it’s her! Wooo!”

Midnight set her jaw, sucking down the cider with increased vigour. Ignoring the burning in her throat and the stabbing sensations in her stomach, she was bound and determined to do this. She could do this! 

By the times her wheezing exhalations of breath had transformed into little whimpers of pain, the alcohol was making her head feel dizzy and weird. Almost like she was floating. But she had this! She could do this.

Midnight wasn’t sure how long it took before the cider ran out, but she was almost happy she’d hit air. Dropping the hose with a moan, she grit her teeth and locked her jaw. Not wanting to move, nausea clawing at the back of her throat. That was the last thing she needed, to throw up…

Somewhere along the line, her eyes had drifted shut. Her ears twitching at the sudden lack of noise from the once boisterous crowd. Unbeknownst to Midnight, they were all staring. Even Bottle. Jaws dropped, eyes nearly popping out of their skulls.

“Miss Midnight?” Gauntlet asked hesitantly, pushing his way through the crowd to get close. Had she passed out? Fallen asleep? Did she need medical care? Gently, hesitantly, he reached a hoof out to touch the rounded out, firm stomach, hoping to garner her attention.

The belch that escaped Midnight could be heard across Canterlot. It rattled the windows in their panes, shook cutlery, startled at least one foal into waking up in the middle of the night in a full tantrum, and had Luna laughing so hard in her tower room that Celestia woke to see what was the matter.

All in all, not a bad night, Midnight concluded. Letting the haze of alcohol and food overtake her before the crowd around her had fully recovered. Settling into the deepest sleep of her life.

(LINE BREAK)

River Dream jolted into wakefulness at a heavy pounding at her door. Stumbling out of bed, cursing her swaying stomach for slowing her down, River waddled as quick as she could to open the door. Heart racing with possibility, wondering what on earth was so important to wake her up at such a late hour.

She wrenched the door open, only to freeze at the sight before her.

Midnight had finally immobilized herself it seemed. Which was fine. They all knew that was going to happen sooner rather than later anyway. But the cart was new, and smart. River squinted, rubbing the sleep from her eyes. At least she hoped it was a cart. It was hard to tell. Midnight’s flab covered everything but hints of metal that glinted in the moonlight.

“Shipping label’s a good touch.” River decided, waddling forward to examine it. Canterlot...well that answered how the contest went. “What am I supposed to do with you?”

Midnight took up the road in front of River’s house, and that couldn’t do. Her loud snoring was going to wake up the neighbourhood at this rate but there was no way River would be able to get her portly friend inside. If Midnight could even fit in one of the rooms.

River sighed, half shrugging. Midnight was asleep and-a yawn made her jaw crack with the force of it-so should she. These were issues for later. Tomorrow morning at least. 

Turning tail, River left her friend to the cool nighttime air.
> After Dinner Mints
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

Midnight chewed thoughtfully, letting the flavours mix on her tongue before swallowing. Another good morsel from Bakewell Tart, who was the chef who had asked her to write a review on his restaurant. 

Now she was able to taste what his restaurant had to offer, Midnight could appreciate Bakewell’s nickname: Chug-a-Lug. All the food she’d had so far had been masterfully crafted, and she could understand why so many others gobbled up his food with such speeds. Nevermind the fact he was capable of eating so quickly too, it was no wonder why he had a portly figure. 

What was the phrase? Midnight opened her mouth for the next morsel to be placed inside. Chewing thoughtfully all the while, mentally taking the notes she no longer had the mobility to do physically. Never trust a skinny chef, that was it. Bakewell had no such drawbacks to him: his food was as delicious as his portly waistline suggested.

Of course, anypony looked small next to her. 

Midnight had, over the past year, had only piled on more weight. Immobilized on River’s property, Midnight had only continued to grow. The larger she grew, the less she moved whether under her own power or with the help of others, leaving her nothing to do but eat more; eager to fill the quiet hours with something she could still enjoy at any size. All that eating had her piling on the pounds, exacerbated by a vicious cycle. Now, she was around the size of a small building. Impossible to get a true weight for, since she’d outpaced the best scales ages ago, and the only thing to provide context for her size was River’s house.

Laying on her stomach, or rather the massive cushion her stomach fat had grown into, Midnight’s flab spread around her on all sides for a few meters in any direction. Making it extremely difficult to reach any part of her that remained pony shaped. Even then, her proportions were massive. Her stomach was by far her largest asset, lifting her off the ground and spreading outwards and upwards. She was roughly oblong shaped, her limbs sucked into their fatty sleeves, which were then further buried in the rolls and folds that emerged as her fat continued to fight for space to take up.

While her stomach was the most impressive, her rear was equally massive. From what others had said, Midnight’s cutie marks were still visible, though they were distorted and faded, so massive that single parts of it were larger than fully grown stallions. Her tail, wrapped up out of the way ages ago, had completely disappeared. The nub of it was blocked entirely from view, hidden under rolls and folds that were so deep, no pony could feel the end of them.

While Midnight had aspirations of growing bigger, and did what she could to fuel her continued growth, she’d plateaued in recent weeks. Unable to push her metabolism any further for two major factors:



Midnight still had to pay for her food.

She had to make the appointments with restaurant chains to review the food. 


It didn’t matter how famous she was, or how widely read her reviews were, Midnight still had to make the reviews. Restaurants, or brands, had to ship their food to her. Some, like Bakewell himself, brought chefs so fresh food could be prepared on site to ensure Midnight would get the best possible product, rather than risk things getting damaged or rotten in transit. 

And that was before the logistics of them getting the food to her mouth. Her head towered above ponies, she was lifted so high up by her own fat. Making River’s house look short by comparison, some had said. Some were pegasi, and would just fly the food to her head. Some brought fascinating little machines to feed her.

Unicorns were fortunate to be able to lift the food to her mouth whenever she opened it. Which was her preferred method, if she were being honest. It was easier, cleaner, and often didn’t have quite so many things go wrong.

Earth ponies like Bakewell had to make do with what was available. River, due to her own fatness, had made a platform on wheels, and kindly lent it out to those who didn’t have other options. The platform could be raised higher or lower with the aid of a crank. Which access to Midnight’s face. Provided the chef didn’t mind walking across several feet of blubber.

“That’s it, Miss. Midnight!” Bakewell sounded exhausted yet proud. “You’ve had everything I brought with me!” He looked exhausted too, Midnight mused, peering over her fat cheeks for a glimpse of him. His food had been good though, even if the portions weren’t enough for her.

Which was unfortunate, Midnight thought. She was still hungry. Still, she utilized the last of her mobility to give a weak nod. The small motion sending ripples throughout the rest of her body, her fat shaking in time with the movement.

“Write up...next week...or so.” Midnight wheezed, her lungs so compressed by fat it was difficult to say much of anything before getting winded. It was worth it though, for all the delicious food Midnight was able to enjoy.

“Hi Bakewell!” River’s cheery voice broke Midnight’s train of thought. “Midnight! I’ve got a new magazine! Food Culture. They wrote an expose about Zesty Gourmand! She’s apparently almost completely ruined the Canterlot food scene!”

Midnight squinted around her bulging cheeks, trying to look down to see River and urge her on. Her wiggles, however slight, always caused her fat to jostle, though, and River continued without needing further prompting beyond that. Knowing that her friend had many opinions on Zesty, and few of them were good.

“She made up some criteria, by herself of course. And awarded anyone who changed their menus with a three-hoof rating, or something, which told everypony she loved their food.”

Midnight couldn’t help but scoff at the idea. Zesty was many things. A talented chef, once upon a time, with good instincts and real talent in terms of food science and how to best prepare things so they looked beautiful. What was always something of an issue, though, was Zesty’s refusal to taste test her own food, and an aggressive policy of cutting costs on anything not 100% necessary to the food. A policy which led to her using the cheapest possible ingredients which held the barest hints of flavours, leaving the portions small and flavour on the tongue nearing zero. Few ponies irritated Midnight so thoroughly, and her reviews had almost ruined Zesty’s career.

Somehow, though, it was clear that Zesty had made a comeback. Probably taking advantage of Midnight’s lack of physical presence to help shift tastes to align with her own. In other areas, that sort of thing wouldn’t take hold: but Canterlot was different. The elite there were sheltered, and often had tastes similar to Zesty’s: little portions so as not to ruin their “figures”, expensive foods so as to boast about the expenses, and almost no flavour to potentially make a scene when it inevitably disagreed with them.

If the changes were well received by the elite of Canterlot, but it was no wonder that it had ruined a lot of restaurants’ good names. Not everyone who lived in Canterlot had the same sensibilities, or the same penchant for expensive foods for miniscule portions.

It was an outdated way of thinking anyway, so no wonder Zesty had almost ruined Saddle Row-

“Hey, hold on, it gets better! Ponies fixed it! Two of Princess Twilight’s friends: Rarity and Pinkie. They helped a new restaurant get set up and ended up uncovering the whole thing. Zesty wasn’t making the restaurants better, she was just molding them to suit her taste!”

Midnight scoffed. That wasn’t at all surprising, given what Midnight remembered. What was surprising was that something hadn’t been done until more recently. 

Maybe I can go visit Canterlot again. Check in, see how the food scene develops after this new freedom. Midnight pondered to herself. It could be worth it, to see how businesses rebounded. They’d be sure to like new reviews after this whole debacle, anything that would put Saddle Row back on the map, and not just for elites like Zesty. After being stuck in Hollow Shades for over a year, a trip could do Midnight a lot of good.

“I can see you thinking up there!” River called. “It’s going to take a lot to get you up there...If you’ll even fit!”

Oh there had to be a public square or park that would work, certainly. Midnight rolled her eyes, huffing softly. She would just need to rent it out for a while, work out transportation, and contact all the restaurants so she could get everything she’d want to try for each one.

It would take some time, Midnight figured. Her budget wasn’t infinite, after all, but she could continue her normal work in the meantime, and start saving up for such an endeavor. It would take a while, but it would be worth it.

“I can try to write some of the restaurants now, there’s lists of them. Oh, this one is the one that brought the whole thing to light! The Tasty Treat, doesn’t that sound nice?” River flipped a few pages of the magazine, clearly speed-reading, before pausing. “Saffron Masala and Coriander Cumin are bringing flavour and spice to their lovingly made meals and snacks, hoping to bring a touch of the exotic to the high streets of Canterlot!”

Oh that did sound good, with names like that. And boasting about flavour and spice….well, it would certainly be worth a try.

“They’ve left contact details for reservations, questions, concerns, that sort of thing. I could contact them, see if they’d be interested in a review?”

“Or even...just to bring...food out...here.” Midnight agreed. “Sounds good.”

“I thought so.” River agreed. “Sounds good, I’ll call them tomorrow morning, see if I can’t get them to deliver some stuff, or something. I’ll figure it out, you get thinking about Bakewell’s food. I’ll come out tomorrow and write down your thoughts so we can send them to the editor.”

Midnight nodded.

“I’ll be back out in a few hours with your snack! Just thought you’d want to hear about Zesty.” Midnight could hear the smile in River’s voice, even if she couldn’t look around the fat that made seeing anything past her muzzle a challenge.

Hoofsteps moved away, and the door shut. Leaving Midnight alone. The grass tickled her fur and skin, the sun warmed her back, and the breeze felt good where it ruffled fur and mane. It was simple, maybe, accompanied by a backdrop of somepony packing things up. Bakewell, maybe, packing up his equipment so he could leave after feeding her for most of the afternoon.

Bakewell’s food was good, complex without being overpowered. With fresh ingredients. If his service was the standard, his restaurant would do fine out in Vanhoover. A little pricier than the average restaurant out that way, but if he marketed well, and kept an eye on things, it hopefully wouldn’t prove too much of an obstacle.

Besides, he was a smart stallion. If his ideas turned out to be too pricey, he knew how to think on his hooves. He could change things around, lower prices, and still make excellent food.

Midnight relaxed, sinking further into her own fat, as she got settled. More than content to let her future plans for Canterlot percolate in the background while trying to expand on Bakewell’s efforts.

Only to have Zesty linger at the forefront of Midnight’s consciousness. Which was annoying, to say the least.

Maybe it was the wasted talent, or the utter selfishness. How someone could claim such love of food but never truly bother to expand their palette past a toddler’s level, Midnight would never understand. Could never understand. Midnight was an example of what could happen when ponies really loved food, though she was an extreme example.

Midnight would have to ask River if there was a picture of Zesty in the article somewhere. It wouldn’t be a surprise if the selfish, snobby mare had lost weight since Midnight had seen her last. 

Never trust a skinny chef afterall. At least the issues were already resolved, and hopefully that would mean other ponies wouldn’t be listening to Zesty again. At least, not unless she had a change of heart, and lived up to all the potential she’d been wasting all these years.