Have you ever gotten so drunk you forgot you offered the princesses' hoof in marriage to whoever brought your sister back? And how many 'es' there are in 'Princess'?
After Luna had been banished to the moon, Celestia got drunk, real drunk. Drunk enough to make up several laws she completely forgot about for a thousand years. What happens when Luna discovers one of these laws, and what's worse, she actually likes the sound of it.
Complete chaos as the mane six now find themselves unintentionally being wed to two Princesses.
That One Time Celestia and Luna Married the Mane Six
Chapter One: When Drunks Write Laws
Written by TheCrimsonDM
Being the Princess of the Sun, ruler of all of Equestria, and arguably the best princess was all well and good. The problem was that despite anything else she was a servant to the people as much as any leader was. In some, few, rare, and exceptional cases this meant she was given a task, a requirement that she had little to no interest in doing. For her part she had been very good at burying any and all of the nonsense requests, whether through bribery, blackmail or even darker means on rare occasions. Not every one of these ancient traditions were able to be washed away.
For her part she did have a team of trusted ponies whose job it was to find such things and remove them before anypony could ever discover them. Yet in all of her infinite wisdom there was one that had slipped through the cracks, one that she had made so, so long ago she had completely forgotten its existence. One that she feared should it be discovered by the pony it would affect, this might cause an uproar in Equestria the likes of which hadn’t been seen since the Eclipse War.
So there she was, spending an entire day not talking to her ponies that wished an audience. Avoiding budgeting meetings. Not mingling with the nobles she needed to keep a closer eye on. Not even going to her school…. Worst of all she missed her afternoon cake.
No she was busy digging around as hard as she could in these archives. Praying, hoping and digging for what she needed. In her pursuit she had found several laws forgotten, including that before anypony was allowed to bring her bad news they must first bring her cake… she was going to bring this one up more often later. Who knows, could be useful.
Honestly she had only written this law shortly after Luna’s banishment and after about three barrels of ale. It should not have actually come into existence. Should Luna find it… should she even hear of it… or imagine it… oh this would be bad.
Still digging through the old texts and laws, ancient pages and scrolls that if not for the magic binding them to this world would have actually turned into dust, she began to realize something that had her scared. These pages had smudges on them. As if dust had been wiped clean from them, and recently at that. Had somepony actually found it? If they had…
***
It was a late night evening and Twilight stood on her balcony watching as the sun faded over the horizon, the last bit of pink slowly vanishing from sight reminded her of Celestia and somehow that made her feel sad. Knowing that the Princess she loved was so far away yet so close at the same time. It was possible she needed more than just a few days of spending time with her.
After all it had been four years ago when Twilight saved Celestia from the most devastating and dangerous of all her enemies. The dreaded cucumber. After that Celestia promised to wed Twilight, only when Twilight was ready. She hadn’t brought it up again, not even once, and Twilight was grateful for that, not because she didn’t want to marry her princess, but because the older she got the more she began to realize all the things that came with marriage.
Being Celestia’s loving house wife, cleaning their quarters, cooking food, and waiting eagerly for her to come home from a busy day of princess duty were all fine and good. It was only after talking with Cadance about it that she began to realize the more… private things that might need doing. It wasn’t that she was unwilling to do marital things with Celestia, it was that she was embarrassed to be so ignorant of them. It wasn’t until two years ago even that she realized when ponies said they slept together they did not mean it in a literal sense.
To say she had been a bit upset and far more embarrassed about it was an understatement. There were many more things she didn’t know either. Currently she didn’t feel like going to bed because for some reason her mind kept forcing her to dream of Celestia in those kinds of ways, but not just Celestia, Luna was there too…
Just outside Twilight saw two ponies she was very familiar with. Rarity and Applejack were walking side by side on this late evening. A few giggles escaping from the mares. They looked happy as could be, so happy in fact even their tails were entwined with one another’s. Twilight listened into their conversation a little.
Rarity was speaking. “Darling, thank you for this late night walk home.”
Applejack lowered her hat. “Of course, Ah ain’t about to let you go alone, Sugarcube.”
Rarity giggled some more. “Aw, thank you. Maybe you’d like to come in for some refreshments before going home?”
Applejack’s eyes were hidden by her hat but her smile was genuine. “Ah reckon Ah could stay a few minutes, or hours.”
“Good, because Sweetie is gone for the evening and the place will be all ours.”
Twilight watched them walking away together. Sounded like they were planning a sleepover all by themselves. She was so happy for them. The first sleepover they had at her place had gone terribly wrong. She didn’t’ even get the chance to play truth or dare properly… meaning she didn’t get to have her first practice kiss. With nopony but Pinkie wanting to do a sleepover after that, she never really got that chance… oh Celestia, Twilight didn’t even know how to kiss. How could she ever accept marrying Celestia now?
***
The door opened and Celestia ignored it. Luna’s voice playfully came in along with the hooves of a trotting princess. “My dearest Sister, what are thou looking for in these old dusty books?”
Celestia made a sour face and continued the search. Even with Luna here she could just burn it and be done with it. “Nothing.”
“Oh ho, but thou hast been here for many an hour now, even missing afternoon cake.”
Celestia froze… wait, Luna was in here… “What time is it?”
“I believe it is past our mutual brinner, or dreackfest.”
“We missed our meal… I’m so sorry, dear sister, I didn’t mean-“
Luna put a hoof up to silence her. “It is quite alright. I know that if there is something bothering you so greatly that you’d spend all night in here there would be a real reason to worry. Hmm…” Luna eyed the shelf Celestia was working on. “These seem to be ancient laws, most of which are quite forgotten if I were to guess. What could be so important about these?”
Celestia resolved to finish this another time. If it was really this late, sleep was going to be needed to continue her search in the morrow. Woe be to anypony who dares attempt to tell her she has other duties to tend to in the meantime.
Celestia shoved what she had pulled down back into their respective boxes and then back onto the shelf. “I fear I may just be imagining things but there are laws here even I cannot remember. See this.” She lifted up the one about receiving cake before bad news. “I believe this applies to both of us.”
Luna smiled. “Oh, I do love this law. I shall see it be put into full effect immediately.”
Celestia smiled. “I thought you would.”
“Too bad that you did not find what you were seeking, my dearest sister.”
Celestia eyed her warily. “Whatever do you mean? I am merely searching for memories of a thousand years ago when things were more simple.”
“Yes, things were simple. You were loved, I was feared. We slay our enemies with great haste and destroy entire kingdoms before they could become more wealthy than us and to the one kingdom that attempted to steal our cake, the Kingdom of Green Lush Plants and Snow… I believe it has become the badlands to the far south now.”
Celestia nodded. “Darker times yes, but simpler.”
“Oh but too bad the one thing you were seeking is still not here. I wonder, wherever could it have gotten to?”
Celestia stared at her. “I found what I wanted…”
“Oh did you? SO you were not seeking to find a comprising law and destroy it before it was found?”
“Of course not.” Celestia smiled. “Would I ever do such a thing?”
Luna matched her tone. “Of course not.”
Celestia nodded and began walking to the door. “Then I shall see you in the morning.” The door closed just as she was about to leave. She looked back and saw Luna with an old scroll levitating by a dark blue aura.
Luna giggled. “Oh, so you really were not trying to abolish or destroy any law before I found it? None whatsoever?”
Celestia swallowed. She couldn’t see what the scroll was but she didn’t have to try too hard to guess. “Of- Of course not.”
“You keep saying that, dear sister…” Luna laughed. “So I suppose that we should get ready then.”
Celestia felt herself backing up, her rear bumped into the door. “R-ready for what?”
“For our mutual weddings.”
Celestia’s eyes widened. “Luna!”
Luna looked back with mischievous eyes. “Oh, so you thought I didn’t know? How many years have I been sitting on this one? You wouldn’t know. At first it sounded a little bit scary, but the more I met them, the more I got to like them and even call them friends, the more I realized that this one law you hid, the one you forgot, was beautiful and perhaps, my saving grace from loneliness. It certainly solves the issue with you dissolving our harem. Let me tell you dear sister, a thousand years on the moon tends to leave one very frustrated, and six loving brides is enough… just barely, to fix that.”
Failing to not imagine her sister bedding the six mares in question aside, it was time for Celestia to be serious. “Luna, that law was written when I was drunk. There is no reason we should consider it viable. It should be banished immediately.”
“You would banish my happiness from the world once again?”
A rock caught in Celestia’s throat as she stared at her sister. There was a mixture of pain and sorrow in those eyes. Underneath it all maybe even a hint of anger. “Of course n-“
“DO NOT, say those three words again.” Luna met those eyes. “I say, this would have been something I could agree to destroying when I first arrived. Now I realize how lonely I am, how lonely we both are, and how much I feel toward these mares. This law, this one law, strives to fix all of that. Of course I wouldn’t want to force them to do anything unkind but we are Princesses after all, who is to say they would ever deny us our request. Or… in this case mandate.”
Celestia swallowed. “Luna, please…”
Luna closed her eyes and shook her head. “Tis fine… I… I do not have to be happy. I can go back to being alone. You can enjoy your sun, your love, and the warmth of ponies around you. I have never once had a problem with being heartbroken.”
Celestia swallowed. “Luna… I… I want to hear what you have to say.”
“Oh? Really now?”
“Yes.”
Luna smiled and jumped in the air with a grin on her face. “Oh my dearest sister I so wished you would have said so earlier. This wedding will be extravagant. Beautiful and full of mirth. Nopony shall ever feel sad, or lonely, or cry themselves to sleep early in the morning because they do not have somepony to hold them again. Instead we shall now have six whole ponies to hold us, to cuddle us, to love us, to-“ Luna’s eyes took on a shine they had no right too as her smile dipped into the more provocative territory, “-make love to us.”
Celestia wished so badly, so so badly she had not recalled this law had ever been made, or failing that to have never made it in the first place. Perhaps Discord could help with- no, knowing him he was laughing himself in two. Of course she was stuck with this now.
Luna met Celestia’s eyes. “So you would not deny us this pleasure… would you?”
“Of… course not.”
Luna squeed as she bounced for joy. Her horn lit up. “Great news, my dear sister. I have already made most of the preparations as well, even hired one mare in question to make all of our dresses, they have been in preparation for months now.”
“MONTHS!”
“YES! I knew you’d be excited. Clearly you were looking for this law to make sure it was accurate and that you could give me the most wonderful present of all time. There are so many ponies waiting in secret for this. Thank you!” Luna’s horn took on a brighter glow and she vanished from sight leaving the scroll to fall gently to the ground.
Celestia looked at it and realized not only was this just a copy of the scroll it was one of a hundred so copies… Luna was not going to let this one go and Celestia did not want to start another war with her because Luna had her heart broken and her hope for love taken away. She wished dearly that they could all forgive her for this. After all Celestia had written this law well before they were born, or their parents were born, or their grandparents or their grand-grand-grandparents.
She was starting to feel really old.
Celestia looked at the scroll and read it to herself.
“Henceforth from this day. Anypony or group of ponies that are able to rescue my baby sister Luna from her evil ways and bring her to my side once more shall have not only my hoof in marriage but my sisters as well. In fact, it won’t even be a request, they shall have to marry us both. In the royal marriage kind of way.
Signed, The most tragically sad and downtrodden of all princesses, Princess Celestia.”
Oh… she was really drunk when she wrote this.
The poor elements of harmony were about to awaken to a whole new world and there was really nothing she could do to stop it less she create a whole new war in the process… Could it be so bad for her to ask her sister to be sane and mature for once in her life instead of finding some new way to cause strife?
It was in times of great stress and panic that Celestia usually found herself the champion of the cause to fight off the darkness that had began the entire conflict. When the conflict, panic, and stress were all caused by her it was an entirely different idea. It had been a restless night and now it was far too early in the morning. Pacing back and forth in her room her mind was rapidly thinking of how to get out of this situation. Luna seemed overjoyed by the idea of the marriage, Celestia was bound to her own laws for better or worse if she wanted to avoid causing another Nightmare Moon. After years of being freed one would assume that Luna would have become sensible, but instead she had become increasingly playful, erratic, and dare she say chaotic. Not in a bad way, well not usually, but this time it was too much. She had to do something to rectify this situation and soon. Her and the future of the elements of harmony all relied on it.
It truly was a shame running away was not an option. The last pony who tried to run from Princess Luna found that Luna had one very good tactic to find anypony. She could find their dreams. The events of that day still haunted Celestia’s memory… and that was just last week.
Luckily Luna had some small amount of tact and hadn’t publically announced the weddings as such. Still, knowing Luna the plans were already in place for said announcement and one single drop of word would likely be enough for Luna to enact them and force everything to go her way in a less than pleasing manner.
Celestia’s plan so far. Deal with the marriage, hope that Twilight doesn’t completely break in the process and that Luna doesn’t break anypony else either. Or break her sister’s heart and risk her turning evil. Or… Celestia could just go evil herself. What was that name she had planned for herself if she ever did, Solar Flare?
The floor she was pacing on was smoldering and had black singe marks in the shape of her hooves. She was getting too upset with this and her emotions were running amuck. If this continued she might accidently burn the castle down before they even began the marriage… oh by her own name, she didn’t want to think about the actual marriage.
Wait, it wasn’t too late now was it? Surely she could just talk to her sister, explain how she viewed the marriages. That would work wouldn’t it? Probably not, but she could at least try, now what was the most believable excuse she could come up with?
Celestia’s horn lit up and she teleported herself into Luna’s room. Celestia landed on top of Luna’s bed pinning her little sister down and staring into those eyes as they shot wide open. Luna swallowed looked around and tried uselessly to move. A quiet sigh escaped her lips. “It is this dream again I see… well doth what thou came here for and be quick.”
Celestia blinked. “What?”
“Thou art a dream construct here to use me like a newly wed bride are you not?” Luna asked.
Celestia blinked and pulled away from her sister, just enough to give them some breathing room but still holding her down. “WHAT?”
Luna blinked, and then giggled. “Oh, it is not a dream then. Fine, do this quickly and be done with it, we have other mares to please soon as the marriage is ready.”
Celestia was feeling incredibly uncomfortable now. As Luna began laughing she realized she had been played. A glare from Celestia did nothing to stop Luna from laughing. “The look upon your face sister, it is worth more than a thousand of words.”
“Luna I am here for serious reasons!”
Luna’s laughter slowed down, but didn’t’ entirely stop. “Go on.”
“I… I am worried about this marriage of ours.”
Luna rolled her eyes. “What is to worry about, I have set all the plans in motion, and even have the greatest of wedding planners in charge of this.”
“Pinkie Pie knows!”
“No not the pink one, this is her wedding after all, what kind of surprise would it be if she had planned it. No, I have somepony better suited for the task of romance.”
Celestia narrowed her eyes. “I’m not doing this.”
“But why?” Luna tried to get up only to realize she was still pinned beneath Celestia’s rather weighty rump. “Whatever could be wrong with them? Or is it me, do you not want to share them?”
Celestia could already hear a twinge of pain in her sister’s voice. “I… Luna the last time I had any romantic experience was over five hundred years ago.”
Luna blinked. “So shouldn’t you be happy to receive all the romance you could dream of from six lovely brides?”
Celestia shook her head. Now time for the ‘not as much of a lie’ as she had originally believed. “I’m scared.”
Luna stared up at her. “But… but… why? Surely they wouldn’t reject you.”
“I haven’t been close to anypony like that in so long, what if I am not… not good enough for them. Things have changed in these modern times. I fear I do not know enough to make this work. So please, can we call it off?”
Luna smiled and her horn lit up. A gentle aura stroked over Celestia’s cheek. “Oh my sister, my dear big sister, I have already anticipated your fears. Please do not fret for I promise, you will be more than ready to please any of their desires. Thou are beautiful and lovely.”
Somehow that hit a spot that Celestia wasn’t ready for… she sniffled and shook her head. Not the point, Celestia shoved her new fear into the vault in the back of her mind. It would be okay. Wait, what did Luna just say. “Luna, what do you mean by ready?”
Luna met her eyes. “I have asked for some ponies skilled in such things to help you learn. They have already taught me much. I could… help you learn in private if you’d like. Thou are already in my bed after all.”
Celestia shivered at the implication. No, no, no, no, and more no. Something else, anything else. “TWILIGHT!”
Luna rolled her eyes. “I also recognized this as a potential problem. Fear not, I shall let you take full responsibility for her if you choose to be selfish. I would like a taste but it is understandable that she is special to you and you may feel inclined to keep her that way.”
Oh… that didn’t work. None of this was working. Luna was out scheming her. Out, scheming, her. What could she do in this situation…
Luna’s horn faired and a line of invisible energy was drawn across Celestia’s flank bringing a gasp from Celestia and causing her to roll backwards out of the bed. She stared up at Luna with wide eyes and feeling her heart beat threaten to break out of her chest. “Luna!”
Luna smiled and patted to the empty place next to her. “If thou are to continue disrupting my much needed rest, at least offer me a replacement for sleep.”
Celestia’s horn lit up and in a golden flash she had teleported herself as far away as possible. Or at least back into her own private quarters. She could practically hear the laughter of her sister through the walls. Well… this had failed. Go with plan B, turn evil and destroy everything in sight hoping that all copies of said law were burned along with it?
Or she could just go eat some breakfast, drink a gallon of coffee, and pray that another idea came to her before Luna had a wedding date set. Yeah, she’d do the latter one. Evil Celestia could wait, until after coffee at the very least.
Once Celestia got to the breakfast table, she was surprised to find she was not having breakfast alone. In fact she had a wonderful treat and distraction waiting for her. Two ponies who might just be able to help her find a solution, or failing that maybe a way to banish herself to the sun. It had be better than whatever devious thoughts going through Luna’s head, and apparently dreams were.
Cadance and Shining armor were both here to visit. Surely still working towards making a baby but with the low rates of alicorn pregnancy the chances were… minimal. It also explained why Cadance hadn’t turned her husband into an immortal alicorn yet. She wanted a baby first, if at all possible. Celestia had tried that once, for several hundred years.
“Good morning, Auntie!” Cadance said in a bright cheerful tone.
Shining Armor nodded. “Princess Celestia.”
She let out a sigh. “You are a prince now, dear. You can stop calling me princess.”
“Sorry old habits die hard.”
She smiled and took a drink of her coffee. It was black, dark and bitter just like her mood had been since she discovered Luna’s plans last night. Still the comfort of Cadance being here was more than enough for her to start to relax. A bite of her pancake drenched in caramel was also helpful.
Celestia was at least polite enough to swallow before speaking. “So, what brings you two here to visit me today? You haven’t given up on foaling have you?”
Cadance waved a hoof. “Of course not. Still trying to do that. Actually been considering asking Discord if he might be willing to help since he’s become such good friends with the others recently.”
“You know what he’ll do if he does. You will have a hundred babies and they will all, each and every one of them, look somewhat like Discord… or Twilight Sparkle. Whatever he thinks is funnier.”
Cadance laughed. “Relax, it was a joke.”
Celestia let out a sigh. “Sorry, I have just been exposed to enough absurd situations today to make this day awkward.”
Cadance smiled. “So we aren’t just here on a family visit as you probably guessed. Luna asked us to help you like we did her… and I think we know why.”
Celestia gave them both a weary look. Oh… no.
Cadance was smiling brighter than ever before and Shining Armor was as well. In unison they both announced. “You’re finally going to marry Twilight!”
“Excuse me?” Celestia asked, her tone as dry and flat as the surface of the moon.
Cadance was still smiling bright as ever. “We know you and her have been engaged for some years now. After the whole ‘event that should never be mentioned’ you promised to marry her.”
Celestia stared at them darkly. They were in on the joke. They had to be. This whole thing was a massive prank by Luna, that or a she was dreaming. “Remind me of this event?”
Shining Armor looked around making sure that there was indeed nopony else in the dining hall. There wasn’t. “With the cucumber?”
Celestia growled. “What of a cucumber and how does this relate to any marriages?”
Cadance’s eyes widened ever so slightly. “Don’t you remember? You accidently threw a fireball into the kitchen causing an explosion. Fruit, vegetables and pasta went everywhere. One of the cucumbers came flying out of the kitchen and landed right inside your… um well it ended up stuck inside of you and since you couldn’t see it and were already so stressed you couldn’t remove it yourself. Shining Armor took one look and fainted.”
Shining Armor swallowed. “I did not. I tactically passed out. Anyway, you were about to have a really important meeting with a dignitary from another country and only me and Twilight had seen where the cucumber had gone. With me in a very intelligently planned nap she had to come to the rescue.”
Cadance nodded. “Didn’t she have to end up using her teeth and hooves because her magic was too dangerous to remove it?”
Shining Armor shivered. “I don’t want to think about that…”
Cadance added. “Well after that you promised Twilight anything she wanted she could have, anything at all. She immediately asked for you to marry her and you said and I quote, ‘of course I’ll marry you, just let me know when and I’ll do that, right after I am done making sure nopony remembers this event less they have more than a cucumber shoved in places they do not belong.”
Celestia stared at them. Oh by the dark side of her sister’s moon, she remembered that. She did everything in her power to block out that memory including Twilight’s request… oh… well at least it explains why Luna was willing to not try and steal Twilight from her, but this did mean two things. One, now she was going to have to try and find a way out of this marriage with all six of them, and two she needed to find a way out of marrying what was essentially her daughter.
Celestia then had a much more horrified thought. “You two came, knowing that I would be marrying Twilight Sparkle, so that you could teach me-“
Shining Armor replied. “How to bang my sister, yes. She’s still a virgin and at this point it’s kinda my job to help her get rid of that.”
Cadance laughed. “It’s only weird because Twilight’s a mare, if she were a stallion nopony would be weirded out by that.”
“I believe in equal virginity loss for all sexes.”
Cadance gave him a stare that promised things it really, really shouldn’t in this context. “So do I, hun.”
There Twilight was on the most lavish, massive bed. Soft and cozy with a sea of red blanket all around her. Twilight moved her lips to ask what she was doing here or where she was only to find her mind not able to latch onto the question strong enough to actually vocalize it. The bed sunk in next to her and she saw a massive dark blue form. A wing fell over her back pulling her close into a warm, almost hot embrace. Looking up from the cover of the wing she saw Luna’s face looking down at her. Slowly the face moved closer to hers. No words were spoken, none were needed as she made her intention clear soon enough with her lips pressing against Twilight’s.
Hot fire raced through Twilight’s face but she couldn’t fight it. A tongue slipped into her mouth, hot, huge, almost choking. Behind her she felt something wet run up against the fur on her flank. Luna let go of Twilight so she could swing her head back to see Celestia there, her tongue licking Twilight’s cutie mark with a glazed look in her eyes.
What in Equestria was going on? Why did Luna kiss her like that? Why was Celestia licking her there? Twilight couldn’t figure it out. This felt familiar. Almost like she’d done this many, many times before. Her mind snapped onto the idea. She was asleep.
Twilight’s eyes opened and she stared up at the wooden ceiling of her tree house. She was on her bed, alone, those weird thoughts from the dream running through her mind. Why was she thinking about something so… weird. She shook her head and pushed herself up. These were not her normal dreams and she was starting to get concerned about them. They were so strange, so inappropriate that she couldn’t very well bring them up to any of her friends. What would they say if they found out she had such disgusting ideas, about her fellow princesses none the less? And why two of them? She could understand if it was just Celestia but why Luna?
The worst part was when she checked her bed, she realized she needed to take a bath and clean her sheets… again. Well at least it gave her a reason to clean herself, it wasn’t exactly unknown for her to go a few days without bathing, especially if she was in the middle of an important study. Of which she needed to find one, immediately before her mind dared focus too much on the dream she just woke from.
After cleaning herself, and her bed, she made her way downstairs to the kitchen where Spike was sitting at the table eating a pancake. There was a nice stack of them in the middle of the table and plenty of syrup left for them too. Grabbing herself a nice small stack of them was just what she needed after such an interruption to her normal perfect and scheduled life. She partially wondered if she could ask Luna to cancel her dreams somehow, if these were going to persist she would have to do something.
Spike was giving her a sly grin. “So… how’d you sleep?”
“Awful… again.”
“Oh come on, being molested by the two princesses can’t be that bad.”
“Why don’t you try having these dreams then and tell me if you like them.”
“I probably would.”
Twilight glared at him and jabbed a fork into the pancake pulling a nice meaty chunk out and stuffing it into her mouth. “Why am I having weird dreams?”
“You’re probably in heat and need to take care of some of that frustration.”
Twilight stared at him. “If you mean pleasuring myself, Spike, I’ll have you know I have a scheduled time for that and it had not solved the issue. Being in heat is also something I can deal with using an assortment of spells to minimize the effects.”
“Maybe you should marry Celestia already and get it over with. I’m sure she’d be willing to do some of that stuff with you.”
Twilight gagged on her next bite of food almost spitting it back out before managing to swallow it. “SPIKE! I… you… how could………. Ugh!”
“Hey, she might even let you have a threesome with her and Luna?”
Twilight stared at him. “A threesome? A three of some what?”
Spike closed his eyes. “Right, super virgin over here… you know what, just tell Celestia about your dream and I’m sure she’ll show you.”
“I am not ever going to tell her about these dreams. Even when we do get married and she wants to do the um… the um… naughty stuff… I won’t tell her. It’s like anytime somepony tells me of them fantasizing about my brother. It’s gross.”
Spike laughed. “Sure, sure. And those recurring dreams have absolutely no meaning whatsoever. You’re not secretly wanting to bed Celestia or anything.”
“Precisely. Not that I even really know what most of what’s going on in those dreams are… it’s just all weird.”
“You really don’t want to do that with Celestia?”
“Well… m-maybe the kissing… a little.”
Spike raised an eyebrow. “And nothing else?”
“I...” Twilight’s ears folded back and she lowered her head a little. “I wouldn’t even know what to do, Spike. She’d probably be disappointed in me.”
“You could ask your friends to help you with that you know.”
Twilight glared at him. “You’re not helping.”
“So let me get this straight; you don’t want to do anything about this, you just want to have these weird dreams until the day you die.”
Twilight felt her heart sinking. “No…”
Spike rolled his eyes. “Tell you what, how about I just get a mare mag for you, and you can learn through study instead of practice, like you always do.”
“A mare mag?”
Spike grinned devilishly. “Oh… I think you’ll like them.”
“R-really? And they’ll help me?”
“Sure.” He hopped down from his chair and began walking off. “I’ll bring one back for you.”
Twilight stared after him. “Where are you going?”
“Big Mac’s.”
“Could you ask Rarity to come here on your way? I might have some um, questions for her.”
Spike shrugged. “Want me to bring the others as well?”
“Why would you do that?”
Spike looked back at her. “Because all of you are having the same weird dreams about Celestia and Luna, especially Luna.”
Twilight stood up leaning her forelegs on the table. “All of us! Even Fluttershy?”
“Yep.”
Twilight bit her lower lip. “It makes so much sense now. It’s some kind of plot.”
“I’ll say.”
“Then you agree with me! There is a plot a hoof. A big plot!”
Spike giggled. “A big nasty plot, right in your face.”
“YES!” twilight thought about it. It was so strange for them to all be having dreams like this. Especially Fluttershy. “I mean, I don’t think Fluttershy has any weird dreams unless they involve animals.”
Spike looked back at her. “Did your really just say that?”
“Yes, Fluttershy has weird dreams about animals. Usually touching her. Why?”
Spike laughed. “Okay, fine enough with me. She seems lonely enough.”
“Spike, tell the others that our dreams are being tainted. There is magical taint in our dreams, and a nasty big plot as well!”
Spike laughed even harder. “Magical, taint!”
“Yes, and it is rubbing off on all of us!”
Spike walked away laughing even harder than before. He could jest all he wanted about this but clearly there was magic ahoof and Twilight was going to find out whose plot this was and stop it even if it meant burying her muzzle into it to find the answers. Somepony or something was influencing their dreams.
She listened to the door closing behind him. Maybe he was right, she would have to contact Celestia after all… and she just sent her letter sender away… oops.
***
Celestia watched in wide eyed horror as Cadance’s horn was alit. An all too real illusion of herself and Twilight were on the breakfast table and life sized. With Celestia mounting Twilight using some kind of… tool. Shining Armor had watched at first, his face paled, and then his head had lulled back and he was thankfully passed out. Something she dearly envied him for.
“C-Cadance, I d-don’t think Twilight would be so bold!” Celestia managed to finally say after a few too many minutes of this image and Cadance explaining how proper hip motions made the process easier but it would be tricky to find the right motion at first with their size difference.
Cadance’s horn flickered and the image vanished. “Oh… I suspect you are right. Hmm, maybe this then.” The image reappeared only with the roles reversed and Celestia was on the receiving end.
Celestia stood up and slammed her hooves on the table. “Cadance Cadenza!”
Cadance rolled her eyes and the image vanished. “My my, Auntie you are such a prude, this is hardly even that exotic. Don’t you want to please your bride?”
To use the word flustered was like calling a raging river a trickle of water. “I don’t think Twilight even knows what sex is!”
Cadance stared at her for a long moment. Worked her mouth in silence and then said, “O-of curse she does. She has too. She’s surely read about how ponies are made.”
Celestia glared at her. “Yes, read about breeding. Not sex.”
Cadance froze. Her eyes widened. “Oh… I completely forgot who our target was… um… hmm… You’re going to want to go easy on her than. Maybe try this one.” Her horn lit up and although the image was much less revolting and extreme, and much more soft and gentle, the kind of thing she could see herself doing with Twilight, literally as in it was actually being shown to her on the breakfast table, which she now realized needed to be cleansed in the holy light of the sun, she still found it disgusting.
Having had enough of this torture Celestia lifted a spoon brought it to Cadance’s horn, pulled the tip back so that it bent backwards and let go. The spoon came flinging forward whacking the pink horn with just enough force to disrupt the spell and make Cadance yelp in pain. She rubbed at her horn and shot a dirty look at Celestia. “Auntie! I am just trying to help. Luna said you’d be nervous about the wedding night.”
Celestia grumbled. “I am the Princess of the Sun. I do not get nervous of such trivial things. My body alone is so hot that any mare could pleasure themselves by pure look alone. A simple touch enough to cause shivers of delight and orgasmic ripples across their body. Why should I need such tools or positions for these things?”
Cadance laughed. “Did you just call yourself hot?”
Celestia stared at her. “Well… it’s true. I have caught Pinkie Pie attempting to fry eggs on my rump before… to… actual success.”
Cadance stared at her. “You let Pinkie do that?”
“Let, and discovered only after I smelled the delightfully and thoughtfully cooked breakfast are two very different things. I shall say though, they had a slightly smoky flavor to them that was not unreasonable.”
Shining Armor was shaken from his state of unconsciousness and his first words were. “You let Pinkie do that to you, but you’re too afraid to let Twilight touch you?”
Cadance smiled. “My thoughts exactly.”
Celestia glared at the two of them. “I would be very careful. I do have the ability to melt the entire frozen north you know.”
Cadance rolled her eyes. “Oh spare me, you would never do that and risk harming an innocent pony. You’re too much of a softy.”
They were playing with fire here and Celestia was about to remind them of that when she decided to change tactics. “So, what would happen if I did cancel all of my half of the weddings. Twilight could still find happiness with Luna I’m sure.”
Shining Armor’s eyes widened a little. “If you canceled with the others, sure, it would be weird and probably insulting for them that you would think yourself too good for them. Twilight on the other hoof… She would lose it.”
Cadance sighed. “It’s true. She has asked me so many times for advice on how to be a proper wife and I have to admit, I’m not the best mare to answer all of those questions. Her hopes and dreams are on being your house wife. She’s even asked me where you and her would live or if you’d take turns living in the palace and then her tree house.”
Celestia waived a hoof. “Nonsense, we could live anywhere, I am the Princess and she is one as well. We could get a cozy home in the country side if she wanted to play house wife so…” she cut herself off. She shouldn’t be answering this question. She was trying to find a way out of this, for herself if nothing else.
Cadance smiled. “I’m glad to hear it, that’s pretty much what I told her too. She’s so cute when flustered though.”
Even Celestia had to concede to that. Twilight with pink cheeks, a little confused and frustrated about a situation, especially with that one single tear in the corner of her eye. She was so sweet when upset. All Celestia would want to do would be to pick Twilight up, hold her close. Gently stroking her massive wings down Twilight’s back until they reached those precious virginal flanks. A gasp drawing from Twilights lips as her frustration turned to something new, something surprised yet inviting.
There was a cold glass of water nearby, Celestia lifted it up with a golden aura, brought it over her head and dumped it down. The water evaporated before it even touched her turning into steam… “Mother of me…”
Cadance suppressed a small giggle and the pink aura faded from her horn. “Thinking anything fun now?”
Celestia growled. “Love Princess, be careful where you use that infectious magic of yours, it might just be your last. As for disappointing Twilight and her probably lifelong dream of marrying me, you were saying?”
Cadance let out a sigh. “With how obsessed she is over you, she might just lose it. Like completely snap. I imagine evil villain Twilight corrupting her friends and then turning against you in a plot to destroy the kingdom and make sure that love could never hurt anypony again.”
Shining Armor grunted. “I’ve uh… You might find I’ve drawn up battle plans for it already. Full well knowing I could never defeat her myself I have trained a unit of guard specifically to defeat Twilight if she ever turn evil. Of course that was before she became an alicorn… I’m sure they could distract her while you fled as far as you possible could though.”
Cadance added. “Not to mention Luna. I fear Luna might have some attraction toward her as well. It is very possible Luna could turn into Nightmare Moon and marry Twilight and use the power of EVIL LOVE! Against all of us.”
Celestia stared at them. “Seriously?”
Cadance shrugged. “That or Twilight could try taking her own life?”
Celestia replied, “But, but she’s an alicorn, she cannot die! Not by any traditional means anyway.”
Shining Armor added. “Imagine then, a scenario where Twilight tries, in ever increasingly horrible and morbid ways to off herself. Eventually coming to you, limbs barely attached by bloody sinew, wings full of rotting holes, an eye missing and blood pooling all around her and her pleading with you to end her misery.”
Celestia stood up. Her ears twitched. Why, why could she see it so clearly in her mind. The worst part was that in that situation, seeing such a horrible awful situation where a zombie pony would look healthy compared to Twilight, that she would actually use the full power of the sun too… too…
Celestia galloped off. “NO! I shall not let this happen. I need a letter and wax. PINK WAX!”
Cadance and Shining were right behind her. Cadance was the first to ask. “What are you doing?”
Celestia grunted in reply as she galloped. “If she may react that poorly to me rejecting her purposely, how do you think she will react to finding out that she would be sharing me with others? No, I must explain this to her myself and immediately. I will apologize and explain that she will be taking my full focus and attention. You said she wants to be a house wife?”
Cadance nodded. “Yes?”
“Then she shall have the best house in all of Equestria!”
It would only occur to Celestia a little later on that perhaps, just perhaps both Shining and Cadance were using extreme examples. Then again with Twilight being an extreme pony, who would know?
Spike was making his way leisurely through town. Honestly he thought Twilight was blowing this whole thing out of proportions. They were just having some kinky dreams, nothing wrong with that. There were a lot dreams Spike had, most of which were unmentionable. Still the way she had phrased it made him chuckle.
It was with some luck that on his way to Sweet Apple Acres he actually saw all five of their friends standing around as if waiting for something. Not exactly uncommon, sometimes he felt like they just sat around waiting for Twilight to summon them to deal with some kind of problem. It was almost like their lives revolved around random craziness happening and dealing with it. The curse of being a hero he figured.
At least this time there seemed to be more reason to it as he heard Rarity say, “So we’re in agreement, Twilight has been locked up in her home for far too long and we need to get her out of that library and into motion.”
Everypony nodded.
Rarity smiled. “Then let’s do it. Let’s- Spike! Darling!”
He rolled his eyes as he made his way to her. “Sup, Rarity?”
“Oh we’re just talking about how to get Twilight to come out more. I’m so glad you’re here. You could-“
He raised a claw. “Actually, Rarity, that’s kind of why I’m here. Twilight had two missions for me today. One: to grab all of you and tell you that you need to go her place for an emergency meeting. Two: to get some educational material for her from Big Mac.”
Applejack cut in. “What kind of educational material could mah brother have?”
Spike laughed. “Nothing important.”
Rarity chimed in. “So, what does Twilight need for us? What is this emergency meeting about?”
Spike laughed harder. “In her words she wants to talk about ‘rubbing magical taint all over your dreams’.” A howl of laughter escaped him as everypony stared at him with wide eyes. Fluttershy even squeaked. “I don’t think she has any idea what that means though. So-“ Looking at Rainbow Dash and Applejack. “-have fun.”
He walked off and listened in just long enough to hear Rainbow Dash snicker. Yep, Twilight was going to have to deal with this and before he came back he was going to get some popcorn to watch the show. Poor Twilight, she really had no idea what was in store for her.
***
For some time Celestia sat at her desk, an open scroll and quill floating in her golden aura. The pink wax was already prepared by her side so she could make sure it gave the correct impression when received. Still, there was one singular problem. “I have no idea how to write this letter.”
Cadance chuckled slightly to herself from behind Celestia’s left. “It’s alright Auntie, that’s what we’re here to help with.”
From behind Celestia’s right Shining Armor added, “And with me here I can make sure it will be a letter that Twilight will not completely freak out about.”
Celestia bit her lower lip. “As you had mentioned earlier, it would be one thing if it was just I who was marrying Twilight Sparkle. When it is both me and my sister, and we are marrying all of Twilight’s friends… This will prove the most difficult task.”
Cadance replied. “Are you sure it won’t be trying to figure out the order in which you bed all six of them?”
Celestia shot a glare back at Cadance, one that could almost melt metal… instead it only singed the edges of Cadance’s mane. “Cadance, if you must be here for this letter, please offer me actual assistance, or leave.” She glanced at Shining Armor. “You on the other hoof, I may need you to proof read this one… never before have I needed somepony to help edit a letter of mine but this one carries more weight than any letter I’ve ever sent to Twilight.”
Cadance made a soft neigh. “Awww, you do care. And here I was thinking you had no intention on marrying Twi-“ she paused as Celestia’s ear twitched. “I think it would be best to start off by telling her how much you love her and will make sure she belongs to you and you alone.”
“Great idea,” Celestia said. Her quill touched the paper and she could already feel her mind shattering as the words she didn’t want to ever think of, were now being clawed out of her mind. This was going to be painful.
***
Twilight sat upstairs with her friends in a circle. She could already feel her breathing rapidly approaching nervous levels as she felt her body tense up. Everypony was staring at her, waiting for her to explain why they were here. She swallowed up her doubts and attempted to put on a courageous face. “I’m here to talk about a plot.”
Rainbow Dash attempted to hide a laugh, poorly. “Oh yeah, whose?”
“I don’t know yet, but I am going to find out who’s plot it is and get right up in it.” Twilight said determined. Somehow this made Rainbow Dash laugh harder. “You see our dreams are being tainted, somepony is using magical taint to make us have the same kind of dreams.”
Rainbow Dash laughed. “S-so the plot is, to rub magical taint on our dreams?”
Twilight nodded gravely. “Yes, I fear so. Though… the more I think about it I’m not sure that is the most apt description but it does fit. However, there is a problem. A plot hole if you will, I can’t seem to understand why they would do this?”
Applejack snickered. “So yer saying, there is a plot hole now, and what should we do with it?”
Twilight beamed. “Fill it of course. We shall fill the plot hole to discover the truth of who is tainting our dreams.”
For some reason both Applejack and Rainbow Dash burst out into a fit of laughter. Fluttershy was hiding behind her mane with a completely flush face, Pinkie Pie was giggling too. Rarity was the only one who seemed unamused. Only her ire seemed a little more placed on Twilight then the others.
Rarity said, “Twilight, dear… do you have any idea what you are saying? Please tell me that you just discovered how to make mature jokes and are having fun with it.”
Twilight blinked. “Adult jokes? Like… jokes about taxes and bosses?”
Rarity put a hoof over her face. “Oh, Twilight… everything you just said, it could be-“
Rainbow Dash covered Rarity’s mouth with a hoof. “Now come on, don’t ruin the fun just yet. Let her continue. Please, Twilight we’re listening.”
Not quite sure of what was going on she did just that, continued. “So I have heard that each of us have been having um… odd dreams about Princess Luna and Celestia. More, intimate dreams shall we say. Originally I thought it was just me and asked for Rarity to come over so she could help educate me on some of the things going on in these dreams and help me stop having them.”
Rarity shoved Rainbow’s hoof down and exclaimed. “What were you expecting me to do?”
“I’m… not sure.” Twilight’s ears folded back. “I’ve not really thought about this kind of stuff before and you seemed like the only one here who might understand.”
Rarity blinked several times. “I’m not sure if that’s a compliment or an insult.”
Twilight was quick to reply. “It’s not an insult. I trust in your knowledge of such things very much. I’m sure you know more than me, you’ve had a coltfriend before or something right?”
Rarity rolled her eyes. “Darling, I think we’ve all had at least one colt or marefriend.”
Twilight bit her lower lip. “Y-y-yes… um… anyway. Spike told me all of you were dreaming the same things. Even Fluttershy! So I knew something was ahoof. Some kind of nasty plot was being pushed against us. Magical taint being rubbed against our dreams as it would seem. Though I just don’t know why. What kind of pleasure could somepony get from a plot like this?”
That seemed to set Rainbow dash and Applejack off again. Ignoring them Rarity added, “I do agree it is odd that we all have been having these dreams, but I do not think there is any harm to them. Originally I thought maybe it was Luna herself causing them and she was just a little lonely, but why would she have her sister join in as well? Celestia does not strike me as the kind of Princess who would be so frivolous with her love making. Even in dream form. Though I must say, I enjoy the dreams myself.”
Applejack sat up straight. “Hold up a moment, you enjoy them? Rares, what the hay?”
Rarity smiled at her. “They are but mere dreams, AJ.”
Applejack brushed a hoof off on her chest. “Well not all of us are into mares like that.”
Rarity rolled her eyes. “I’ll keep that in mind the next time you come to my home, lonely, sad, and in need of some more mature cuddles.”
Applejack shot a dirty look at her but said nothing.
Twilight was losing track of the conversation again. “Well… pleasant or not for you, I agree with Applejack not all of us like them. I don’t even understand what most of what’s going is or why they keep licking me. Why would they do that? I’m not some kind of ice cream.”
Rarity blinked. “Oh my… you do need some education.”
Twilight stared at her. “See, this is why I originally asked you to-“
Spike came up the stairs with a paper bag in one hand and a bucket of popcorn in the other. He walked up to Twilight set the bag down and said, “Here’s the book you wanted. Well it’s not really a book… and I think you should probably look at it in private.”
He walked over took a seat on the stairs and popped a hand full of popcorn into his mouth. Twilight lifted up the bag opened it up just enough to see what was inside. Some kind of magazine with a mare on the cover striking an invocative pose. She closed the bag and shifted it to be under her wing.”Oh… um… okay… where were we?”
Rarity replied. “We were talking about who or what was causing these strange dreams.”
Twilight nodded. “Of course. You see, even I have to admit that there might be some general interest in the princesses in this way as they are rather… attractive. But what really tipped me off was Fluttershy. There is no way Fluttershy would have dreams like that about somepony, especially not a big scary princess.”
Spike added. “Why don’t you tell them the kind of dreams you thought she’d have.”
“Oh, right,” Twilight added. “She normally has dreams about herself and various animals.”
Every pony gasped for a mere second, before Rainbow Dash hit the floor on her back rolling over with laughter. Fluttershy stood up and stared wide eyed at Twilight. “EXCUSE ME!”
Twilight flinched. “But, but, but Luna said so. You dream about animals touching you in weird ways. Usually making you the um… pet…”
Fluttershy’s ear twitched and her eyes became pinpricks. “Luna, Luna, is lying. I have never, despite what anypony might have made rude references too, dreamt about animals in that way.”
Twilight knew she’d crossed a line, not exactly sure what line, as dreams were as Rarity said, just dreams, but she certainly crossed one. Spike was busy laughing it up on his step and eating popcorn and so she was left on her own. “Of course, I believe you.”
“No you don’t!”
Oh no… she’d never seen Fluttershy actually angry with her. This was scary. She saw what Fluttershy did to that bear, she snapped its back in half. She didn’t want that to happen to her. Something had to help, anything had to help. She looked over just in time to see Spike burp up a magical letter. Everypony looked at him.
“Distraction!” Twilight cried as she grabbed the letter and dragged it over to herself. It had a pink wax seal on it. This was one she’d never seen Celestia use before. She could think about the odd color choice later.
Twilight opened it up and began reading aloud hoping that whatever the contents were the others would forget about Fluttershy’s anger. “My faithful Loving Twilight Sparkle.”
It seemed that caught everypony’s attention even Fluttershy seemed stunned. They weren’t’ the only ones, Twilight wasn’t familiar with this kind of attention either. She continued.
“It has come to my attention that there were several laws written shortly after Luna’s banishment that I had, for no fault of my own, forgotten existed. Once found Luna and me began work towards making these laws come to pass in the most pleasant and peaceful of way.
So it is with regret that I admit I am unable to wait any further until you are ready to marry me. Our marriage will happen in the week and I do so look forward to it. I promise you that, you will belong to me specifically and I will do everything in my power to make you the most happy and comfortable bride in all of Equestria.
Cadance and Shining Armor are helping out of course.
So what were these laws and why are we getting married so soon? Well the main law in question is that whoever should free my sister from her corruption and return her to my side will then take my hoof and my sister’s in royal marriage. Of course you were there to rescue her so you are part of that, in addition to the other elements of harmony. I will keep you up to date as things proceed but please find a way to explain this scenario to your friends as I fear they might have some adverse reactions at first.
With Love, Celestia.”
Well… at least Twilight didn’t have to worry about finding a way to break the news to her friends now.
The entire library fell silent save for the sound of Spike howling with laughter.
“So,” Celestia said after sending the letter. “Do you think this will work?”
Piles of half written and thrown way scrolls littered the desk and floor around her. Cadance smiled gently. “After the initial freak out, I’m sure Twilight will hear how much you love her and want only to marry you all that much faster, even if she has to share.”
Celestia let out a sigh. “I do not intend to whore myself out to all six of them.”
Cadance rolled her eyes. “When you are the ruler of Equestria and they are your brides, I do not think that you can ‘whore’ yourself out to them. Though… if you wanted too, I could help with that.”
Celestia had hardly heard Cadance’s last sentence as her mind was still firmly on that of her precious student. In the many years they had known each other Celestia had felt much more like a mother than a mentor. Even trying to picture Twilight in some sort of romantic light gave Celestia shivers of disgust, but hearing how she had inadvertently made herself engaged to Twilight sent even more. There was going to be a lot of hard conversations to be had should she try to get out of this situation. Unless of course if what Cadance and Shining Armor had suggested turned out to be true. In which case, for the good of her student’s fragile mental health and that of the entire nation she would make this small sacrifice and be willing to not only wed Twilight but to please her if need be. Luckily for her she figured Twilight still thought anything more than a kiss was disgusting and weird. That mare had never really grown out of that.
Of course with Luna around that innocence was inevitably going to be shattered. What would Twilight even be like if she became more sexually active than a rock? Her small but shapely rump swaying as she shook her hips. Full lips pouting and eyes looking back suggestively. Her tail flicking back and forth invitingly and showing only the briefest glimpse of her-
Celestia looked at Cadance and noticed the mare was an almost glowing pink. “Cadance, would you mind taking about ten paces away from me while I’m in contemplation. Thank you.”
Cadance giggled and trotted away. The images of Twilight being naughty were beginning to fade but now that she’d seen them all too many times it was going to be hard to forget them. Cadance’s aura of lust was going to be a nightmare in the upcoming week. At least this gave her some time to plan around Luna. How was she going to get herself out of this one? She figured at this point marriage to Twilight was probably, most likely, unavoidable. Marriage to the other five of Twilight’s friends would be easier to start with.
Celestia just needed a way to convince Luna to stop the weddings only something that would make Luna think it was her idea all along. How would Celestia pull that off? Well she had no idea. Shining Armor and Cadance were all for the marriage to Twilight, and probably okay with the other marriages as well… but what if the elements of harmony themselves were not okay with it? Sure the law practically stated they had no choice in the matter but if Luna felt like she was forcing ponies to be unhappy maybe her kindness would kick in and she’d relent… oh wait, Celestia was the one who identified with the element of kindness… her loyalty would kick in and follow the law that was written to its word.
Well failing any attempts at favoring the positive traits that Luna had, she should focus on the vain ones. A cruel smile crept over Celestia’s lips as she rubbed her hooves together. Oh yes, vanity, the one thing that Luna had never truly been able to get rid of. What would happen if these ponies didn’t love her anymore because she forced the marriage upon them? Oh, her heart couldn’t take it so she’d certainly call it off before hoof and at least ask their approval.
***
Rarity blinked a few times as she stared at Twilight. “Did you just say that we are, as in all of us, are marrying Princess Celestia and Princess Luna?”
Twilight’s horn flickered and the letter dropped a few inches. Her jaw was dropped, eyes wide with mere pinpricks for pupils. Her chest was completely still, it was as if she’d stopped breathing… Oh wait, she had.
“Twilight!” Rarity cried as she reached over and slapped her friend gently across the face.
Twilight sucked in a huge breath and began coughing a few times. Once she was finished she set the letter down and looked about the room. “No.”
The look in Twilight’s eyes hadn’t changed; in fact she was looking even more manic than before. Rarity could feel the panic starting to go through her as well. Certainly she was not against the idea as those dreams had indicated she at least had some interest in both princesses, but this was so sudden. “Twilight, are you su-“
“I said no!” Twilight exclaimed. “No, no, no, no, and more NO!”
Rarity reached out with a gentle hoof and pat Twilight’s shoulder. “Darling, calm down. We can figure this out. I’m sure the arrangements will work ou-“
Twilight’s eyes jerked and looked right into Rarity’s with a piercing gaze that sent a cold shiver running down her spine. “I will not share, I will not get married yet, and NO!”
Rarity jerked back as Twilight’s head jerked from her to each and every one of their friends. “This is not going to happen. I do not care what Celestia or Luna have to say on the matter. We are not marrying them. I-I can hide us. I can take us far away from here and we can hide and nopony will ever find us.”
Pinkie Pie cut in. “But Twilight, I want to marry them!”
Everypony shot a look in her direction. Twilight exclaimed, “What?”
Pinkie Pie rolled her eyes and giggled. “Think about it Twilight. Celestia in front, Luna at the back and Pinkie in the middle. They’ll make a pony sandwich out of me.”
Rarity gulped. “Darling, I do not think that now is the best time to be turned on by the idea of marrying both princesses.”
Twilight sat up straight. “What do you think this is? Some kind of poorly written horror story where ponies get turned into food. They will not turn you into a sandwich they will have sex… I said NO!”
Twilight’s mane and tail was starting to waver as if a nonexistent wind was coursing through her mane and tail. It was happening. It was finally happening. Rarity shot a look at Spike. “Spike, prepare the Midnight Sparkle letter immediately!”
Spike dropped his popcorn, his eyes widened as Twilight began to levitate into the air. He scrambled up the stairs while shouting. “I’m looking now!”
Twilight’s eyes began to glow with teal colored light. Her mane caught fire and floated upwards. Flames of black, magenta, pink and purple were waving above her head. Twilight began screaming. “NO! I refuse to allow this to happen! You will not touch my princess, or any princess for that matter!”
Spike was upstairs he had a scroll with a black ribbon and wax seal on it. One burst of flame later and it was sent. All they could do was pray that Celestia could arrive fast enough to save them all. Rarity had known this day would come eventually, the day where Twilight would eventually snap, go to the dark side, and usher in some kind of apocalypse, they all knew it, even Twilight was aware of the possibility. Every security measure was in place, now they just needed to run.
Except an idea hit Rarity…
Rarity stood up and glared right at Twilight. “Are you really so selfish?”
Twilight, no, Midnight Sparkle glared down at her. “You dare call me selfish, you of all ponies?”
Rarity put a hoof to her chest faking insult. “You wound me, Twilight. Just like you’ve clearly wounded Celestia.”
Midnight Sparkle blinked. “I would never harm a hair on her beautiful, perfect head!”
“But you have wounded her heart by taking so long to accept her marriage proposal!”
Midnight Sparkle froze. Hanging there in the air she looked conflicted down at Rarity. “Explain, mortal!”
“Hmph, I shouldn’t have to explain something so simple to you, but I shall indulge you. Princess Celestia has clearly been looking forward to your marriage for such a long time, but you, you had to go and be too scared to accept it and ask her to marry you. Now she has to resort to some ancient out dated law to force us to marry her too just so she can have you at her side. How long do you think she has gone to sleep alone, cold, and heartbroken wanting nothing more than you at her side?”
Midnight Sparkle began to sink. Her pupils coming back closer to a normal size. “N-no! I am, but, she said I could wait!”
“And do you not think four years has been long enough? She loves you, Twilight. As you love her. Only she’s the one suffering from a broken heart, she probably thinks you don’t even like her anymore.”
Midnight Sparkle landed on her hooves. The hair lost its fiery hue and fell down around her looking more like a wet mess. The colors began to return to normal and the glow vanished from her eyes. Twilight Sparkle was there once more and her lower lip was quivering. “I… I didn’t mean to!”
Rarity walked over and threw her legs around Twilight swallowing her into an embrace. “Of course not, darling. And who could blame you if you’re scared of being intimate. However, I am sure she would be more than patient and understanding so long as you were at least there to kiss her goodnight and hold her in your legs. She is a thousand years old, I’m sure sex is of no concern to her, only love, true love!”
A wail of pain and sorrow escaped Twilight’s lungs as she buried her head into Rarity’s chest. The wail devolved into broken sobs as Twilight’s body shook and shivered in her legs. Rarity stroked Twilight’s back whispering. “There, there. Now that the marriage is set, she won’t have to be lonely anymore. I’m sure you’ll make it up to her. You’ll be the best bride of all of us, I just know it.”
Twilight couldn’t respond, her attempts only broke into more sobs. Rarity looked over at Spike. “Spike, be a dear and send the emergency cancel letter before we have the royal guard plus two armored princesses at the library.”
Spike already had it in his claws. “Already on it.”
***
Celestia had finally managed to get back to her breakfast, now cold, and was only enjoying her coffee when a letter popped into existence above her head landing on the table. She saw there was a black ribbon around it, one she’d never seen before. Shining Armor stood up, his eyes widened and took the letter himself. The impudence of his action would upset her if the look in his eyes didn’t utterly terrify her.
Shining Armor opened it and read. “PRINCESS HELP!
“Twilight Sparkle has become evil and is the new Nightmare Moon. Code named Midnight Sparkle. She is destroying the town and may have already slain or corrupted a number of us in her wraith.
“Um… if um… you don’t mind… please send help… and come with um… the big guns…
“I’ll probably be alive, Rainbow Dash here by the way, too awesome to be killed but I might be evil now so… uh sorry if I’m already at the castle breaking your stuff… no hard feelings right?
“Princess Celestia, please make sure you are already on the run when you get this far in the letter because I’m sure her first target will be you. Also don’t forget to bring the running away dress I made you for the occasion.
“Also don’t forget to bring apples. Might help with the hard days ahead as Twilight destroys us all.
“Dear Princess Celestia, I am so sorry for the poor quality of this letter. My friends have decided I have to write last as I’m the one causing the issue. Please… put me down quickly. I’m just a unicorn with crazy magic, I’m sure you and Luna could both work together, but I must ask one thing… could you be the one to end me? I would prefer it if it were you. Love, Twilight Sparkle.”
Silence filled the dining room for several long seconds. Shining Armor took a seat. Cadance was looking at her plate. Celestia’s mind was a frozen state of shock. It was true, Cadance was right, Twilight had lost it, become evil and then Shining Armor was right too because she wanted Celestia to be the one too, too, too-
Another letter appeared above her head. This one with a white and black striped ribbon. Shining Armor let out a sigh and slid down in his chair upon seeing it. Cadance fell face first on the table. Celestia lifted this one up and unrolled the scroll. She read this one out loud.
“Dear Princess Celestia.
“We have things under control. Somehow we managed to calm Twilight down and she is no longer evil. Probably destroyed half the town in the process though. So at your nearest convenience can you come by the library, should it still stand, and bring Twilight’s favorite story. I think she will need you to spend several hours reading to her and giving her chocolate and hugs. Thank you.
“Thanks from everypony except for Twilight because she doesn’t know we wrote an emergency cancelled letter.”
Celestia leaned back in her chair. Today had been a roller coaster and the idea of simply reading a story to Twilight for so much time sounded simply wonderful. Even with the new knowledge of her marriage to Twilight being apparently a thing, she still relished in the idea of the simple task. She looked up at Cadance. “Do you still have a copy of The Little Unicorn that Could?”
Cadance thought. “Probably, you did loan it to me while I was foalsitting Twilight so I’m sure I do.”
Celestia smiled. “Good, now to get the finest chocolates we have.”
Rarity was content that even if Twilight was emotionally destroyed, she was at the very least, not going to kill them all or turn them into her evil magically corrupted sex slaves. Or whatever other things an evil Twilight would probably do. Instead Twilight had found solace by surrounding herself in a square box made entirely out of books with only a small slit for her to look through.
Rarity wasn’t sure this was a good sign but it was an improvement. “Darling, do you plan on leaving there anytime soon?”
“NO! I am never leaving my fortress of literature. No force shall break these walls. Any who dare try will find themselves pelted by the unimaginable force of books!”
Rarity reached out toward the so called fortress only to have a book launched at her face at high velocity. Luckily for her it missed her eyes only hitting her in the forehead and knocking her flat on her back. Rarity stared up at the book now covering her face.
Rainbow Dash snickered. “So, is this what they meant by the pen is mightier than the sword?”
Rarity levitated the book off her face and growled in the direction of the book fort. “You are not getting this back.”
Twilight pleaded. “I need that! It’s my cannonball.”
“Just because it has cannonball in the title does not mean you can fling it at your friends with no warning.”
Twilight begged. “I’m sorry… please, I need that.”
Rarity let out a huff and levitated the book back to Twilight. “The next time you throw a book at me, I am more likely to eat it than return it, so do keep that in mind.”
Applejack cleared her throat. “Now that the threat of our world ending and/or apples being banned for an eternity or whatever an evil Twilight would probably do, we should talk about this here marriage.”
Rarity beamed. “Of course, we should make plans. It is our eternal happiness on the line and we will only get one chance for a perfect wedding.”
Pinkie Pie exclaimed. “EXACTLY! So this party has to be perfect!”
Applejack cut in. “Now hold up you two, Ah reckon not all of us are too keen on marrying the princesses. Ah know Ah sure ain’t.”
Rainbow Dash puffed out her chest and replied. “And I’m too awesome to be a princess, so uh… no. I’m going to be a wonderbolt, a hero, and a knight, not one of those things is a princess.”
Fluttershy squeaked out a response that probably meant no. Applejack added for her. “Ah take it she ain’t too keen on it either.”
Rarity looked at them. “Oh dear, this could be a problem. I don’t think we exactly have a choice in the matter, of course you could always attempt running away like Twilight suggested but do keep in mind that Luna can track you through your dreams.”
Fluttershy let out a quiet eep.
Applejack stroked the top of the head of the scared pegasus who was busy hiding her face behind her mane and doing her best impression of a flamingo hiding its head in the dirt. “There, there, Fluttershy. Ain’t nopony gonna force you to do anything.”
Rarity wanted to counteract that with the fact they were dealing with actual princesses that were borderline goddesses. They did not have a choice if the princesses so deemed it. Of course a lady knows something of tact so she chose another method. “I personally would love to marry them. They seem lovely and anypony who gets to marry them becomes a princess. Isn’t it a fairytale come true for any young filly? Well, Rainbow Dash aside.”
Applejack huffed. “Well that’s the issue, we ain’t fillies and not all of us are too interested in the idea of fillyfooling.”
Now Rarity knew that one was a bold faced lie but she’d cross that bridge when she got to it. For now… “Pinkie, please tell us why you’d like to be married to them.”
The pony was nothing if not excited as she jumped up. “It’s going to be the best marriage in all of Equestria, in like, forever! Plus we don’t just get the marriage we get the party! Not to mention the after party.” A devious look crossed her eyes as she licked her lips. “I’ve always thought they were like, totally hot as well. I mean have you seen the plots on those two, they're juicy!”
Rarity rolled her eyes. Of course Pinkie would be interested in-
“Oh and we’ll get access to as much cupcakes as we could ever eat. Imagine that!”
Well… at least that was a less revolting reason to marry the princesses, though perhaps not the most mature. Granted Rarity would not deny the princesses did have some succulent features, but that would not be her reason for marrying. Looking at Fluttershy she smiled and a plan came to mind. She knew exactly how to get all three of them to agree to this, at least for now until they had some time to think about it, with luck they’d be all be married before then.
Rarity walked over and took a seat in front of Fluttershy. She gently laid a hoof over Fluttershy’s. “You haven’t voiced your own opinion, Fluttershy, what are your thoughts?”
A tiny whisper, just barely audible managed to say the word, “Scary.”
Rarity gave a little laugh to help disarm the fear. “Fluttershy, these are the two most powerful, kindest, and gentlest ponies in all of Equestria. I think anypony who would call themselves their wife would be in a position to be the safest pony in all the world if they desired it. Who would dare try to scare you, what monster would even think about getting near you with the protection of both Luna and Celestia, not to mention an army of royal guards to keep you safe.”
Fluttershy’s eye peeked up through her mane. “R-really?”
“Of course. There is nowhere safer than under their wing. Literally in this case.”
Fluttershy blinked few times looked down and to the side as if thinking and then replied. “I-I think your right. B-besides… um… I’d get to be a princess right? M-maybe an alicorn princess?”
Rarity laughed. “How could they not desire to make you into an alicorn princess? I do not know how they would do so, but they managed to make Twilight into one somehow.” That or being vaporized by the Elements of Harmony did the deed, Rarity still wasn’t sure how Twilight become one exactly.
Fluttershy nodded and Rarity could almost feel a small smile underneath all that pink hair. “I… I’ll do it. B-besides, Luna is k-kinda c-cute, in a scary way.”
Rarity smiled and stood. She then looked at Rainbow Dash. “Honestly, I thought you’d be the first one to jump in on this. You are truly the coolest pony in Equestria are you not?”
Rainbow Dash pumped a hoof in the air. “Heck yeah I am.”
“Then can’t you understand why Princess Celestia and Luna would want to marry you! You’re too, how you say, awesome for them not to want you.”
“Well yeah… but I don’t want to be all girly and protected like Shy.”
“Rainbow Dash if you are a princess you can choose to be protected or to be a hero like none other. Think about all the times Celestia, Luna, or even Twilight have done amazing, heroic things. The epic battles, the kingdoms they destroyed or the ones they raised. And who, in their right mind, would even attempt to tell you that you couldn’t be a Princess Knight Wonderbolt!”
Rainbow Dash actually sat down and chewed on that for a moment.
Applejack raised her voice but Rarity cut her off. “The most heroic and famous of all Princesses of all time. The one and only Princess Knight Wonderbolt Rainbow Dash. You don’t want to be girly, say no more, I shall personally assist in the creation of a magical suit of armor and matching sword just for you!”
Rainbow Dash stood up. “You’re totally right! Why am I always so dumb, I didn’t even think about it. Celestia and Luna like, fought Discord, and Sombra and who knows what else. Of course I could be the most awesome princess. Count me in…. I also get to bang the two most untouchable mares in Equestria, who wouldn’t want that?”
Well… that was at least the right train of thought. Rarity next looked at Applejack. “AJ-“
“Nope,” Applejack cut her off. “You might be able to convince the others with yer tricks and manipulation but not me.”
“Money issues.”
Applejack’s mouth stopped and zipped themselves shut. Moments ticked by before she spoke again. “Now… Ah’ll have you know, even if money was ever a concern for the Apple Family, Ah wouldn’t marry just fer money.”
Rarity leaned over and placed a hoof on her shoulder squeezing gently. “Of course not, dear. There is another reason as well. You’ll get to marry me.”
Everypony fell silent for a moment and stared at the two of them. Applejack lowered her hat and spoke quietly. “Now, why would Ah want something like that? Ah don’t mess around with mares…”
“Oh, is that what you weren’t doing at my house late at night, every night, for over a year?”
Applejack growled. “Rares…”
“Listen here, and listen well.” Rarity sat down and pushed Applejack’s chin up so she could stare into those green eyes once more. “If you weren’t a part of this marriage, no matter how much I want to be a princess I would fight for my right to either stop it, or to force them to marry you too. I want to marry you, dear.”
Applejack’s eyes glistened and she bit her lower lip. “Then why didn’t you say so sooner?”
“I was waiting for you, silly. But the time is too late for that now. All we can do is work with the tools we are given. So let me ask you this once more in a way that might change your mind.” Rarity cleared her throat. “Will you marry me, Applejack. Marry me and the princesses?”
Applejack stared at her in silence for a long moment. When she finally spoke her throat sounded dry. “Ah… Ah can’t say no to that. It would hurt you… f-fine. Ah’ll… Ah’ll do this but Ah ain’t gonna like it.”
“Nopony said you had to like it. Once we’re fully married, I promise you I will give you more attention than either of the princesses, on pain of death or whatever they do to naughty fillies, I swear it to you. You’re my first and primary concern.”
Applejack lowered her head onto the floor and closed her eyes. “Ah reckon you’ll have a lot of work to do.”
“Of course. I have dresses to make before the end of the week.”
Rainbow Dash added in. “Can my dress be kinda cool, less girly?”
“Of course it can, I’m going to make sure all of our dresses match us properly. For you Rainbow Dash, I’m thinking an expansion upon your last gala dress. No armor unfortunately but, but, but… I could draw inspiration from the current project I’m working on…”
Applejack’s ears twitched. “Um… Rarity?”
“Y-yes?”
“Haven’t you been working for months on a set of wedding dresses? Two that are alicorn sized and six that are uh… inspired by us?”
Rarity swallowed. “I may have… I may have finished those dresses and sent them off to Canterlot and have received Luna’s approval of them just yesterday as well.”
Applejack looked up from her hat. “Ah think we already got our dresses.”
“I fear you may be onto something,” Rarity said while now realizing just how long this plan must have been in the making. In fact, she had an underlining fear she vowed to never mention in front of Twilight. The fact that she only started having dreams about Luna and Celestia after receiving the initial requests to make these dresses…
Rarity looked back at the fortress. “Twilight, dear… I haven’t asked your thoughts yet. How do you feel about the wedding?”
Twilight replied. “Not going.”
“And disappoint Celestia?”
There was silence. “Can’t she have a private wedding with me alone?”
Rarity smiled. “She could do whatever she wanted but I fear in this case she is following a law she can’t pull herself from. Besides, you’ll hurt Luna’s feelings as well, and if you do that, how will Celestia feel?”
“…bad…”
“Yes, Twilight, she would feel bad. So let me ask you again. Will you please join the wedding with us?”
Twilight was silent for all but a moment before asking, “I’m not sharing Celestia?”
Pinkie Pie replied. “Now that’s just greedy, I want some of that hot sun butt too!”
The cannonball was fired with Twilight making the sound of an explosion with her mouth. The book flew at Pinkie who caught it in her teeth and set it down to read. “Thanks! I was wanting to read this.”
Rarity glared at her. “Now what did I say? You are not getting that back missy!”
Twilight groaned. “But then they’ll be able to lay siege to my castle and take me away for marriage!”
“Twilight, that is just silly.”
“You’re right… I need to escape.” The fort fell down and Twilight sat there with a new set of attire. A pirate hat, sword, and even a small boat floating at her side, all made of various newspapers. Twilight took on an accent and declared. “Yar, I be setting sail for the seven seas and no empire can capture me. I be taking me princess booty with me you filthy scallywags!”
Rarity stared in dumbfound shock. Twilight had completely lost it. At least she wasn’t evil, or actively trying to run away. As she ‘sailed’ the ship around her head making ocean sounds as the boat rocked upon imaginary water, Rarity realized she was probably the only sane one left here. At least Applejack, Rainbow and Spike were getting a laugh out of it.
With a sigh Rarity walked over to Twilight’s desk, pulled a quill and ink pot from it along with a scroll. “Spike, I’m going to need you to send a letter soon.”
Spike nodded but was laughing too hard to reply.
Twilight stared at her for a moment before laughing. “Ye best be careful lass, for the owner of that there island is quite obsessed with their order, but we pirates crave the chaos of the open sea!”
Rarity began writing.
“Dear Princess Celestia
We are all looking forward to our marriages to you and Princess Luna, but I fear I have some ill news for you. Twilight has lost her mind and become a pirate, though I think she is still interested in the marriage, you may have to accept her mind might have been shattered. At least her heart is still here and thinking of you.”
She stopped there. This was going to be a much harder letter to write than she planned…
Celestia had to force herself to re-read the letter sent to her at least six times before her mind could even begin to grasp what was going on. “Twilight is a pirate…”
Cadance purred. “Exotic, sounds like she’s into the roleplay.”
Celestia looked at her. “Well she did teach me how to roleplay, so yes she is ‘into it’ if you will.”
Cadance smirked. “Oh really, and what did you roleplay?”
Celestia smiled brightly. “I wanted to live the life of a simple peasant earth pony farmer. She was the princess who took me away on a grand scaling adventure.”
The smile Cadance gave her was one of pure evil, for some reason she felt lucky Shining Armor had left to attend to some lesser matters around the castle else she feared he would join in on whatever Cadance’s plans were. “Was the plot any good?”
“Oh of course, Twilight had an excellent plot.” Celestia proclaimed. “Of course there were a few plot holes, but I loved to help her fill those.”
Cadance stifled a laugh. “I’m sure you did.”
Celestia wasn’t exactly sure what was so funny about this, and she had the feeling that she didn’t want to know. They were busy trying to make their way down the halls without waking up Luna. The last time she interrupted Luna’s sleep still sent shivers down Celestia’s spine after all. Still the preparations for a marriage happening in technically less than a week were frightful. At this point she only had one defense against this, one singular plan of attack to stop the wedding at least temporarily while she searched Canterlot for every, single, copy of the law and burned it.
A small maid with pink fur and a white mane walked past them. A brief whisper was heard from her as she passed. “Thirty two.”
Celestia smiled. Thirty two had been found and disposed of so far. That only left… one hundred and sixty seven, if her count were accurate. Given what she knew of Luna, she estimated at least another forty copies of the law to exist. Time, time was all she needed.
Cadance asked another question. “Did you ever have a plot for Twilight to play in?”
Celestia smiled. “Of course, but mine was… not as well structured. Don’t get me wrong, it was big, and it was glorious, but it was soft compared to Twilight’s and the holes just couldn’t be filled no matter how many things we tried.”
At that point Cadance couldn’t contain it and started laughing like a madmare.
Celestia rolled her eyes. “Honestly, I do not see what is so funny with a story having some issues. It turned out that neither ogres nor oubliettes could fix those issues. However, Twilight still had fun with my plot and I suppose that is all that mattered. Oh, and she was a wizard.”
Cadance was still howling with laughter as they passed by door. A burst of cold energy shot out from under the door and tendrils of shadow whipped out wrapping around both of them. Celestia looked up to see the mark of a crescent moon above the door and her heart stilled. The door itself was padded deep indigo with violet buttons and trimmed with black lace around the edges. Why she couldn’t just have a normal royal door was beyond her but Celestia had long since stopped trying to understand her sister’s sense of taste.
What she hadn’t done was let the tendrils holding her hostage have their way with her.
The door burst open and a dark silhouette stood inside. A pair of moonlit eyes glared at her. Celestia swallowed. “I’m sorry, dear sister.”
Luna’s voice came out like a crackle of lightning. “Doth thou think I care? My slumber is precious and once more thou hath interfered with it. No more I say, thou shalt receive full punishment for these crimes.”
A lone tendril lifted up, it coiled and snaked in the air. Glistening wet around its surface. The way it wiggled was almost suggestive. At the tip it held aloft a single feather taken from a highly prestigious pillow.
Celestia’s horn lit up. “You wouldn’t! Not when we’re talking about our future wives.”
The feather inched closer to Celestia’s barrel. Luna’s voice hissed. “I care not for the topic at hoof, only for the interruption of mine sleep!”
Just as the feather was about to make contact with Celestia’s soft, unprotected belly, Cadance cried out. Luna looked over to her as well as Celestia. Cadance for her part was looking at them, upside down and with a face so red that it almost looked like a pimple attached to a mare’s body. Her legs had been spread open by the tendrils and one of those tendrils was inching ever so closely to a very special place.
Luna gulped. “Niece!” the tendrils vanished and Cadance dropped unceremoniously to the floor with a thud. Luna trotted out. “My apologies, Niece. I fear that perhaps I lost control a little there.”
Cadance looked up at her. “I might be the princess of love, but even I draw the line somewhere.”
Luna let out a sigh. “At least I did not accidently do more. Sleep deprived Luna, is not safe at work Luna. There are only two things that would set me into a spiral of dark magic the likes of which nopony has seen before. Interrupting my sleep, and blocking my marriage. Luckily thou art here to help with that. So please, stand, in fact I believe it is time to send for our lovely brides. Before the press ponies catch wind of who they are.”
Celestia stared at her. “Luna, we need to talk in private.”
Luna smiled. “Could it wait for after we secret our new princesses here?”
“I fear not. I still have concerns and I wish for some…help in calming those. As our fellow, co-wife. You are the only pony I can turn to for help.”
Luna’s smile faded a moment her eyes looked to the side as if she was thinking about it. The smile returned as quickly as it left. “Of course, you are still scared. I assume our niece has taught you well?”
“Yes… even if it was unwanted, I fear I learned more than I bargained for.”
Luna’s magic wrapped around Celestia’s neck and dragged her inside shutting the door behind them and leaving Cadance outside. “Tell me, whatever is the matter? Do you need to practice first, I can help with that.”
Celestia chose very wisely to ignore what kind of practice Luna was talking about and sat down. She had to try and make this work, to make Luna see some reason. This was her only chance especially if she was going to drag them here today. “Luna, what if some of them are straight?”
“This is the term used to describe stallions who prefer mares and mares who prefer stallions correct? The once average pony desire… back when there were enough stallions to share.”
Celestia nodded. “Although odd now in days, due to the lack of stallions, there are still those who do not enjoy the romancing of the same sex.”
Luna’s horn lit up and her body began to change. “Oh, I do have this one covered my dear sister.”
It was almost like a horror picture the way Luna’s muscles grew thicker, her muzzle more broad, her chest strong and masculine. Even her rear end had become a taught, muscular machine. Between Luna’s legs now rested a very large… Celestia couldn’t look away.
Luna laughed in a deep, sensual voice that sent shivers running to the wrong parts of Celestia’s body. The thick, rumble of his voice made Celestia’s everything go red. “I may only be able to hold this form for a few hours, but it should be more than enough to please any and maybe even all of our wives.”
Celestia, lost for words could only say, “What if they don’t um… like you?”
Luna’s smile never wavered. “Oh, do not worry my dear sister. I have been coaching them in their sleep. Each one of them have had pleasant responses to both you and I. Of course I have not used this form with them and I feel it would be a most appropriate surprise… what are you staring at?”
Celestia couldn’t look away, she had never seen anything so wrong, yet so right as a strong, masculine, sexy as all get out alicorn stallion. Instinctively her body was edging closer, her tail lifting. It was only once Luna’s masculine hoof gently touched Celestia’s face lifting it up to look at her that Celestia began to remember this was actually her sister standing before her.
Luna’s form shrunk and returned to the smaller feminine form it once had. “Sister, does this… interest you? I could use a practice partner if it does.”
Celestia stood up. Noticed that the floor where she had sat down now had been singed in the perfect shape of her buttocks. She forced her tail down with magic and stomped off to the door. “You are never to use that spell in my presence again. Also please retrieve our brides posthaste, I feel this wedding cannot happen soon enough.”
Luna squealed with joy. “Of course! I shall see to it as we secret away our brides. Nopony shall be made the wiser.”
Celestia left the room, shut the door behind her and slid down to the floor with her back against the wall. Cadance’s face was still red. “So… you discovered the spell I should never have taught her.”
Celestia glared at her. “Why? Why would you do that?”
“Well to quote you, what if some of them were straight?”
Celestia closed her eyes. “I’m going back to my room.”
“Oh, need some privacy after that do you?”
“No,” Celestia cried. “I am going to prepare for Twilight’s arrival. Nothing else.” At least… probably nothing else. No laying on her bed imagining that rugged, handsome god Luna had transformed into pushing her down, getting on top of her and-
Celestia stood. “Actually, you are coming with me and demonstrating once more what techniques I need to use on Twilight after we are married.”
“I could teach you that spell if you wish?”
Celestia glared at her. “I do not think Twilight would appreciate that.”
“Twilight isn’t your only bride.” Cadance said with a wink.
Celestia had already began walking away. “I will inform you if I wish to know. For now, show me myself and Twilight.” So that she may purge her mind of the thought of herself and Luna.
***
Luna had mentioned she was going to secret away her brides, and she had meant it. This was in her mind a task that was going to take awhile as even though she knew where they all lived she did not in fact know where they all were at the moment. Perhaps Celestia had expected her to have some guards go out and fetch them. There were three in mind, three adoring and loyal bat ponies she could use, but as with most things, she was a princess of Equestria and ruler of the night. If she was going to marry these fine mares, she was bringing them home herself.
When Luna first teleported inside the Golden Oaks library she was surprised to see more than just Twilight there. In fact all six of her lovely maidens were there. Well… maiden might not be accurate for half of them, well for more than Twilight and Rainbow Dash anyway, but they were lovely none the less and she couldn’t judge, it wasn’t like she was a maiden herself.
With all eyes revealing their surprise and awe for her she basked in their gazes for a moment. The first one to speak was Rarity. “Princess Luna! What brings you here so soon?”
Luna walked up to her and stretched out a wing gently stroking Rarity’s cheek. The mare’s cheeks went pink with an adorable blush as she looked down and slightly away. “Don’t look away my love. I am your princess, your bride, you may look as long as you desire.”
Rarity’s vision looked back up to her, eyes glistening. “Thank you.”
It was Twilight who came up to her next. First she felt a heavy weight drop upon her back, and then lavender hooves wrap around her neck. A newspaper folded into the shape of a saber lashed out at Rarity thwacking her on top of the head Twilight’s voice cried out, “Back ye demon, this be my treasure ye be eying up!”
Rarity took several safe steps back away from the threatening thwack of the sword. Luna looked up to see Twilight Sparkle wearing a pirate hat and floating a paper ship next to her head. “Twilight, my love. I knew you were possessive, but I did not know you were so playful as well. Please, don’t be upset that they wish to share some of the treasure too. As captain of this here crew, should you not at least part with some small amount of it for them?”
Twilight frowned and then let out a sigh. “If me treasure be asking it, then I shall relent. Scallywags, here me and here me now, I may share this piece of booty, but the other is mine and mine alone. Any who dare try to take that one from me be losing an eye and walking the plank.”
Pinkie Pie giggled. “Yes sir, Captain Twilight!”
Luna smiled as well. “I knew you all were the best choice. I love all of you.” She looked to Spike who was sitting on the staircase. “I will be back for you, but could you let their families know that I have taken them away for their weddings. Thank you, Spike the Heroic Dragon and First mate to Captain Twilight.”
Her horn lit up and the entire room flashed blue leaving the bewildered dragon there all alone.
Chapter Eight: When Luna's Quarter's Meets Celestia's
Chapter Eight: When Luna’s Quarters Meet Celestia’s
Written by TheCrimsonDM
Luna was absolutely ecstatic about inviting her newly betrothed into the castle. The first place she needed to show off of course was her bedroom, considering a great deal of time was likely to be spent here. At first when they arrived the group of six before her looked around as if blind. It seemed perfectly bright enough in here for both herself and her elder sister to see. Then again Celestia did actually glow so the room always became annoyingly bright when she was in here.
Luna jumped onto her massive bed, its black blankets causing waves where landed on it. “Welcome ye to my room, the private quarters of the Princess of the Night!”
There were a few mixed expressions among her crowd as well as strange noises coming from the tiny ponies. Seeing how small they were made her realize that all six of them could very easily fit onto her bed without issue. This could prove to mean for some entertaining nights spent here. Her endurance for such things was of course notorious. Entire towns had been rumored to engage in certain acts with the princess of night, the princess of passion, and she still hadn’t been winded, except for that one time she challenged an entire city… that was perhaps a mistake. However, it was fun, and that was all there was to be said about it. Sore or not, she did not regret it.
It was only then she realized that Princess Twilight was still on her back and she too couldn’t seem to see anything. Rarity’s voice called out gently. “Um, Luna, my love, are there any lights in here we could turn on?”
Luna sat down on her bed promptly. “Hmm, I am not sure. I have never had trouble seeing in here.”
Rarity’s horn lit up and an orb of light appeared in front of her casting a brilliant blue light all around them. Luna thought it too bright at first but looking at her future wives she noticed their eyes were able to focus and they all found themselves staring at her as she lay on the bed with Twilight riding her.
Luna grinned. “I see, my apologies, I often forget the sensitivity of mortals. I shall see to adding some soft lights here soon, perhaps some luminescent flowers.”
Rarity was the first one to look away from Luna, her eyes sharp as the diamonds on her lovely curved flank as she scanned the room. Luna tried to follow her gaze to see if she could understand what the mare was thinking. From the posters of ponies wearing dark mascara and lipstick and wearing darker yet clothing, the dark ceiling with little stars that would sometimes glow with their own enchanted light to the dark blues of the carpet which had a pattern of diamonds sewn into it. The many shelves filled with various comic books, graphic novels, manga and even a few select video games, and even the painting of a much younger Luna and Celestia standing in front of the old Castle of the Two Sisters from back in its prime. There was even a map of Equestria from what it looked like a thousand years ago, the old cities which were mostly gone now, as well as the old rivers and mountains.
There was also the new scorch mark on her floor in the shape of a certain Princess of the Sun’s butt and legs. Clearly the stallion form was too powerful to use on anypony. At least for now.
Then there was something that Rarity’s eyes caught on and stayed on. It was a series of photographs, mostly recent. One had Luna and Celestia hugging in front of a giant castle. Another had Luna back when she was first freed and unsure of what the little box that shot demonic light at her was. It was of course a camera and the flash had scared her half to death but kept her tiny form preserved forever next to that of her sister and all their friends. Luna spent many nights looking at that photo and seeing the happiest look upon Celestia’s face, she had never seen her sister so happy… she wanted to see her smile like that again. Surly marrying Twilight and her friends would help return that precious smile to Celestia’s face.
Rarity smiled and looked back to Luna. “I enjoy the goth aesthetic of your room.”
Applejack chuckled. “Looks like yer room did when you were a teenager, Rares.”
Rarity shot a sideways glare. “Shush you, that is our bride you are speaking of.”
Applejack smiled slyly. “Didn’t say that was a bad thing.”
Luna squeed, catching the small earth pony by surprise. Her accent was so cute. It was sometimes hard to understand what she was saying but every word out of Applejack’s mouth was like a candied apple. She took one bite, but couldn’t get enough. Looking down over at Rainbow Dash she noticed the mare staring at the video games.
“Rainbow Dash, my beloved, does thou enjoy games?”
Rainbow Dash beamed. “You bet I do. We should play Call of Honor sometime.”
Luna narrowed her eyes but her smile stayed the same. “Oh, I should warn you, I am quite a good sniper. I fear you may not live to see much of a match.”
Rainbow Dash grinned. “Oh come on, I’m too fast for your sniping tactics. But you’ll just have to wait and see.” She threw her forelegs behind her head and drifted upside down for a moment.
Fluttershy was staring at the comics, specifically the manga. Her eyes were wide and sparkling as she gently reached toward them, only stopping herself mere inches away. Luna spoke. “Fluttershy, love, all you see here I am willing to share. If you wish to read some of those comics, please, suit yourself.”
Fluttershy’s lip quivered. “It’s the complete set of Sailor Pony. The moon warrior… I never thought… it’s beautiful.”
Rainbow Dash groaned. “Ugh, your weird backwards comics again. I don’t know how you read those, they give me a headache.”
Applejack laughed. “So does thinking too hard.”
The look Rainbow Dash gave her was incredulous but somehow still friendly. Twilight shifted on her back and leaned over whispering. “Yar… I thought me other bride be here too…”
Luna reached up with a wing and pat Twilight’s shoulder. “It’s alright, we shall see Celestia soon.”
“Yar, then I will plunder her booty as I have plundered yours!”
Luna laughed. Such a silly pony. Speaking of silly ponies… where was Pinkie Pie? Luna’s eyes widened. She did not forget Pinkie Pie did she? She seemed the most interested in the dual reality of the marriage, how could she forget to bring her along. It wasn’t until she looked harder she found Pinkie Pie off in the corner staring at some of the posters with the ponies wearing the makeup. Handsome stallions who were not afraid of their feminine side at all.
Pinkie Pie glanced back at Luna. “Have you heard any of their music?”
Luna nodded. “My Changeling Romance. It is quite good. Tis a shame the band broke up some time ago.”
Pinkie Pie giggled. “I like their music, even though its usually sad, I feel like I can understand it you know.”
Luna nodded. “Agreed. Especially their songs about lost love and heartbreak.”
Pinkie Pie looked over, her eyes a little sad but her smile reassuring. “I promise I’ll never break your heart.”
Luna sniffled. Her emotions were a little out of control this morning. It must have been the side effect of Cadance’s magic. A mere touch from her had sometimes caused Luna to make the most embarrassing of noises as pure pleasure shot through her entire body. Even though she’d gotten more used to it, she still struggled with maintaining her aura of calm… then again these were her brides, who cared if they saw the emotional side of her. She was all theirs to love, even the parts of herself that she didn’t feel comfortable with.
Luna shook her head slowly and smiled. “Thank you, Pinkie Pie. That means the world to me.”
Slowly Luna stood up from her seat on the bed and walked off, landing on the floor with a small jolt making Twilight jump a little. Twilight stared at the door and pointed her sword forward. “Onwards we sail, to the island where my next treasure awaits!”
Luna leaned her head back nuzzling Twilight with the side of her face. “Am truly your treasure?”
Twilight grinned. “Of course ye be!”
To say she was happy was an understatement. Despite her plans, her slow grooming of the love to blossom in these six, she was still terrified they would reject her upon her initial demand. If they had, she would not force any of them into marriage, she was a princess not a monster. Surely at least one of them would have loved her back… if the worst of her fears had come true and all of them rejected her, well… maybe she was playing with fire here but the gamble had paid out well so thoughts about dark alternate timelines where she takes over Equestria as its sole ruler were naught to be thought of. Instead she had better concerns, like bringing their brides to see Celestia, now that they have seen Luna’s private quarters, it was time to see Celestia’s.
***
Celestia sat there in her room, staring at the illusion that Cadance was using to teach Celestia how she could safely, gently, deflower her most precious student. This demonstration had done its job, the fantasy of herself with a male version of her sister was gone. Princess is Wincest, not today. Of course now her mind was full of images of Twilight in that same frame of reference. Better, but still disturbing.
The worst part was thinking about the actual process of deflowering. Cadance had several specific techniques to make it pleasurable and less painful for Twilight. Each one required an increasingly more intimate touch that made Celestia feel as though she should find a way to spay herself immediately as though she was a cat, for the fire now burning in her loins was there solely because of sinful thoughts toward a specific student of hers.
The particular image on display then was one of Twilight sitting rather precariously on Celestia’s face. It was… Celestia refused to admit it looked anything other than disturbing. It certainly didn’t look fun, nor engaging. She certainly didn’t plan to try that one out on their wedding night. No, nothing of the sort.
Cadance was in the middle of her sentence when Celestia finally paid attention again. “-careful as when mares get a little too into it becomes very easy to ride too hard. Though I doubt she could hurt you, you might end up in a very uncomfortable position very fast.”
Celestia was still eyeing the image, fully aware that Cadance knew she was doing so and finding herself unable to look away. No matter how hard she tried. She even tried to imagine Twilight as a cute little filly again to see if that would make it go away. It in fact created an image that was ten times worse than imagining intimacy with her own flesh and blood. So she settled on just staring at the image and trying her hardest not to enjoy it.
The doors to her quarters slammed inward as an intruder rudely broke in. Celestia spun around intent to fight or face whatever the intruder could be. Be it monster, a horde of changelings, or Twilight Sparkle wearing a pirate hat and riding her sister like some kind of mount and unable to see as the Pirate hat was wedged over her eyes.
Cadance quickly dropped the illusion but too late as the other five mares standing behind Luna, and Luna herself had all seen it… and probably got a good look at Celestia’s backside revealing any and all thought she was currently suppressing as well. Well… that’s a fine welcome for their future wives.
Luna squeed. “Sister, they enjoyed my room and wished to see yours. Well I wished them to see it! Also I am glad to see you are taking our niece’s lessons to heart and enjoying them, I too deeply enjoyed them.”
Twilight fixed her hat and saw Celestia, thankfully just the real Celestia, not the ‘doing outrageously inappropriate things with her’ Celestia. Twilight’s horn flashed and she reappeared upon Celestia’s back with her legs wrapping around Celestia’s neck instead. “Yar! My precious treasure booty! How I shall plunder ye with me love!”
Celestia cocked an eyebrow at her. “Yar?”
“YAR!” Twilight proclaimed squeezing tighter. Not nearly tight enough to cause any problems, but clearly enthused.
In fact the squeeze felt nice. The way Twilight’s body pressed against the back of her head. The warmth flowing through Celestia from the smaller mare. The way her haunch pressed into her back. The feel of certain anatomical features present on Twilight were rubbing into the fur.
Celestia’s horn lit up and Twilight was gently plucked off of her back and set on the floor nearby. “Twilight, um… please sit.”
Twilight wrapped her legs around Celestia’s foreleg instead nuzzling her face into Celestia’s side. “My love, my treasure! I captain Twilight Sparkle shall keep you safe from all those who would seek to take you away!” She glared at her friends and whipped out a sword made from folded newspaper. “That includes the lot of those scallywags over there.”
Celestia swallowed. “Well… I think I understand your letter now, Rarity.”
Rarity nodded and smiled. “And I see Cadance has been offering you some advice…”
Luna’s grin widened and she nodded thoroughly. “Of course, me and her both. We intend to be the best of wives. That means knowing every way we can please the six of you.”
Celestia groaned.
Rarity smiled. “Oh of course, my love. And a proper lady knows about discretion so I clearly saw nothing when I came into here. Especially anything compromising.”
Celestia looked over and realized there was at least one other mare that had probably not seen the shameful demonstration. Fluttershy stood at the door with one of Luna’s comic books in her wings. Her eyes reading from right to left, rather than left to right… oh it was one of those ones. The ones Celestia had a hard time reading or for that matter understanding. They were just mostly violence and perverted jokes anyway, despite Luna’s insistence that if she gave it a chance a deeper story would emerge.
At least it meant Fluttershy had something in common with Luna. Maybe the marriage wasn’t such a bad… no it was still an awful idea. Maybe friendship between those two was a good thing instead.
Celestia waived a hoof. “Well, as my future brides I’m sure you will all see plenty of my quarters soon enough. Please come in and rest yourselves. I will have more food brought to us, for now if there is anything I can do for you, please let me know.”
It was then that Celestia noticed Twilight had vanished from her side.
Twilight nearly shouted. “Fire the harpoon!”
Celestia and the group looked over to see both Twilight and Pinkie were nearby eating some of the leftover pancakes Celestia had brought up with her. Twilight’s newspaper boat was leveled in front of a pancake with a fork set above it. She made a ‘whoosh’ sound with her mouth as the fork speared into the pancake. “Pull back the pancake whale, do not let it go me hearty crew!” the pancake lifted up and to her mouth where she took a bite of it.
Pinkie Pie was by virtue of not being completely out of her gourd eating more subtly, and Pinkie was just shoveling pancakes into her mouth with her bare hooves. Entire pancakes to boot. How her mouth could open that wide and her tongue reach out like a frog to grapple around them was preposterous.
Luna nearly whispered. “Now that is a mare I can’t wait to take to my bed.”
Celestia ignored her sister’s vulgar comment as she was too busy stifling her own laughter. Twilight Sparkle, the pirate captain of the S.S. Newspaper, was probably the most adorable thing she had ever seen. Too bad she was going to have to reset twilight to factory default here soon. At least she had just the book to do so.
For now she would enjoy her little pirate princess.
Rarity had never been inside a princess’s room before unless one counted Twilight, but really, she didn’t even have a castle so who counted her? Being in two of them one after the other was a real treat. Her first discovery was just how different Celestia’s room was from her younger sisters, it was, one could say as different as night and day. She expected a lot more purple or pinks to be honest, what she did not expect was all the gold.
Gold seemed to line everything in Princess Celestia’s private quarters. From the giant desk made of worn, ancient oak, lined with golden drawer handles and gold flowers on the sides. To the chandler in the ceiling which was made entirely of gold. Even to the floor which was a pristine white with golden symbols ran through it. Anything from images of flowers to mountains lined Celestia’s floor. The walls had a very light blue with golden images of clouds. Following that up she noticed the entire ceiling was a multi-layered image of the sun, lined with gold, orange, and yellow.
The monster of a bed Celestia must sleep in was neat, tucked in, and draped with a red blanket one might mistake for a carpet due to its size. In fact, Rarity could easily see herself, plus all of her friends, and both Celestia and Luna on that bed. Their honeymoon was sure to be an interesting one she thought to herself, though she did hope there might be some more privacy and tact for her, she also understood the princesses might have immediate, hungry desires that would require all six of them to satiate. Well she would not leave any of her new brides wanting.
There was a fireplace nearby, a small fire was currently burning it and warmth radiated throughout this room. Though when Rarity thought about it the warmth did not come from the fireplace, it was coming from Celestia herself. Bedding Celestia was going to be a real treat if even from a distance she could feel such warmth coming from her. Of course… she would have to find a way to placate Twilight later, the poor mare was absolutely frazzled by the discovery of the multiple marriages.
Luckily for the poor thing she was underneath Celestia’s wing, being held close as Celestia was reading a foals bedtime story to her for what must have been the eleventh time. From the reactions of Cadance, it would seem this was not an uncommon occurrence. It was odd watching them though, to Rarity, they seemed as though they might be more like mother and daughter than hidden lost lovers… their relationship must have been an odd one indeed.
One thing Rarity did notice right away as being different from Luna’s room was the kind of books on the shelves here. Most of which were very technical looking, a lot about magic and the understanding of how it came to be. There were also a few photo frames around showing off Twilight and Celestia, each of them had a photo of the two hugging as Twilight progressed in age.
There weren’t necessarily a lot of what Rarity would call personal items in here though. Unlike Luna’s room which screamed with teenage angst, Celestia’s was quiet, ordered, and almost a little stale even with its regality. Perhaps this reflected their owners more. Luna was dark, playful and very emotional. Celestia was quiet, reflective, warm, but a mystery.
Honestly, she could start to really see the appeal in both Princesses. No wonder Twilight fell for Celestia. Still she had so many questions one of which was yet to be answered. She looked to Cadance who was nearby watching Celestia and Twilight with a gleam in her eye.
Rarity smiled as she slid up next to Cadance. “So, have either of them revealed the wedding date yet?”
Cadance smiled and looked down at her. “Celestia and Luna have disagreed on the best day. Luna wanted it to be today. Celestia said a month from now. After some friendly discussion that did not at all involve throwing objects such as cake hurtling across the room and into my husband’s face, they settled on this upcoming Friday.”
“This Friday, as in three days from now Friday?”
Cadance smiled. “Well it is at the end of the week, and with it being Tuesday it gives the six of you plenty of time to adjust to the castle and to your new lives here.” She put a hoof to her chin in thought. “Though, I sincerely doubt they will demand you technically live in the castle, they will probably ask that you stay for the remainder of the honeymoon.”
A cold shiver hit Rarity’s mind. “Honeymoon, oh my, I hadn’t even considered that properly yet. I was so focused on my joy for marrying them that the idea hadn’t really struck. What will we do for a honeymoon?”
Cadance laughed. “Well to quote Luna herself, they are the rulers of Equestria, there is no place that would deny them or their beautiful brides from enjoying their honeymoon there. Unfortunately they have not decided on exactly where that should be.”
Rarity smiled. “Well, if they need any suggestions, I am more than happy to offer some of my own.”
Cadance nodded. “That would certainly help out, it has been a long time since either of them even thought about such things so they don’t have all the up to date knowledge that you would.”
Rarity chewed on that thought for a moment allowing herself to think out loud. “We should find a place that each one of us could find enjoyment in. Las Pegasus is not the safest idea as one or more of us are likely to end up intoxicated and falling off the city edge somehow… I know from experience that it is not a pleasant journey down. Manehatten could be fun.”
The sensual voice of Luna played like a chilling melody from Rarity’s ear as she whispered. “We could spend the honeymoon here, in the royal wing of the castle. I’m sure there are plenty of rooms for us to explore in.”
Rarity glanced over to see Luna giving her a mischievous look with what could only be described as the trademarked ‘bedroom eyes’. She did her utmost to match the look as she said, “Of course there will be plenty of time for that, love. However, wouldn’t a once upon a time event like this call for something truly extravagant? I’m sure you and your sister would love a vacation from all these politics as well.”
From somewhere behind her Fluttershy appeared. Her voice was tiny but she spoke quietly. “There’s a um, a nature preserve to the north of here where p-ponies often have um… arrangements like um… ours. They stay in a little cottage and get to enjoy eating some of the local… herbs, and mushrooms… its run by a mare named Tree Hugger, um I think. I’ve always wanted to meet her?”
Luna frowned. “Why would we eat mushrooms?”
Rarity stared at Fluttershy as realization dawned on her of exactly what the reserve was. “You don’t mean the Happy Meadow, the one right outside of Equestria’s technical border do you?”
Fluttershy nodded. “Mhmm, it sounds lovely. Animals, hot springs, plants to eat, I really want to go. I hear you can even meet your true self there.”
Surely Fluttershy had no idea of exactly what kinds of plants they were growing there and for their need to be outside of Equestria due to legal issues. Of course… it could be fun. “As fun as that sounds darling I don’t think all of us would find such a place to be the most entertaining.”
Luna frowned. “It does sound like an adventure, perhaps just the two of us could go someday, my Fluttershy. For now I fear I am not ready to meet my true self. I’d rather meet your true self.”
Fluttershy’s cheeks turned a bright shade of pink and she let out a little squeak as she hid behind her mane. She returned to her comic pretending as though she was not there. Luna was smiling at her. “You truly are the most cute of my brides.”
Rarity huffed at that. Most cute, her butt. She could be cute too… she had to forcibly remind herself that this wasn’t a competition, they had already won, all six of them. Maybe sharing so many wives could be a small problem after all, still she wouldn’t deny anyone of them the ability to become a princess, her jealousy was not quite that strong. At least not yet.
Applejack came over alongside Rainbow Dash. “What are y’all talking about?”
Luna herself squeed as she stared at Applejack. “I take it back, you are the cutest of my brides.”
Rarity felt her jaw drop. Applejack, the cutest, the… what?
Applejack tilted her hat forward and looked away, even her cheeks were turning a bit darker. “Thanks, Princess.”
“Please, Applejack, my love, call me Luna. We are to be wed after all and soon enough you yourself will be a princess.”
Applejack swallowed. “Alright, Luna.”
Rainbow Dash made a gagging sound. “Puh-lease. All this mushy gooey love stuff is going to make me sick. I want some action.”
Luna met Rainbow Dash’s eyes. “You truly are fast, aren’t you?”
“Fastest in Equestria.”
“Hopefully that does not apply to everything,” Luna purred.
Rainbow Dash met her eyes, heard the chuckle coming from both Rarity and Applejack and face hooved. “No, no it doesn’t. There are some things that even I can take slow… kinda.”
Luna’s smile grew. “So, where would thou prefer we go for the honeymoon?”
Rainbow Dash crossed her forelegs over her chest. “Las Pegasus, get wasted, get in bed, get laid. Seems like a plan.”
Luna frowned. “Laid? Is that not what the island ponies do when they put flower necklaces around your neck?”
Rainbow Dash snickered. “Oh man, you’re just as bad as Twilight. I’m going to love this.”
Luna seemed lost from that statement but smiled earnestly. Applejack spoke up. “Rainbow, Ah see exactly one problem with that plan of yers. Most of us can’t fly. So how about we just go somewhere quiet, like uh… Appleloosa?”
Luna stared at her. “Is that not the town thou kin have started in the south. I fear the town is not big enough for the eight of us. However, one on one, I could see myself going there with my dearest of apples. Could I have one request?”
Applejack nodded. “Sure thing, Prin- Luna.”
“Could I wear a hat like yours when I do?”
Applejack chuckled. “Alright, Sugarcube.”
Luna grinned. “Oh joy! Tis a fun adventure we have planned. Eating of the mushrooms with Fluttershy, a drunken adventure with Rainbow Dash, and a real cowfilly romp with Applejack!”
Rarity couldn’t help but to smile, seeing Luna so happy with the marriage and the simpler things had really settled some of the fears even Rarity had about this marriage. It would seem Luna might really love them all after all, and if that was the case, how could any marriage to their loving goddess of night be a bad thing?
Rarity leaned in and nuzzled the side of Luna. “You truly are wonderful, Luna.”
A dark blue wing draped over her back and drew her in close. “I am glad to hear you say that. All I wish to do is give all of you the best lives possible.”
***
Twilight blinked. Somehow her head felt cloudy, foggy. She was warm, oh so very warm. As if somepony had wrapped actual sunlight all around her and was squeezing her close to make sure she was safe. It was an old, familiar feeling. The words she heard were just as calming.
Celestia’s voice was like a sonata that brought ones soul to life and made it dance with enchanted magic. How could Twilight ever resist going towards it. Listening in now she heard the tail end of a story she knew so very well. “-And that was how the little filly became the unicorn that could.”
Twilight blinked and some of the fog cleared. She realized she was surrounded by white feathers and fur. Each of which was so impossibly warm she feared anything less would feel freezing as a result. The last thing she wanted to do was to leave her little cocoon of warm fuzziness.
Still she began recalling some of the events that led to here. A letter read by Spike detailing a planned multiple marriage. Twilight going to the dark side then realizing she was a pathetic waste of space who had led Celestia on for years only to force her hoof into a decision that would impact all of Twilight’s friends. Finally she realized that if she was still inside her library and Celestia was here…
Twilight stuck her head out and stared up at Celestia. “Did we get married already?”
Celestia stared down at her with a look she couldn’t quite decipher. “Not yet, you just arrived.”
Twilight shook her head. “Arrived where?”
She looked around. She was inside Celestia’s bedchambers. They all were in fact. Most of her friends were over by Luna crowding the princess. Cadance was there as well. Nearby sat Pinkie Pie who was eating some cake and watching Celestia intently.
Pinkie pie asked. “Are you going to read the story a twelfth time?”
Celestia smiled. “Depends.” She looked down at Twilight. “How do you feel about that?”
Twilight felt herself shivering even with Celestia holding her so near. She saw a piece of half eaten cake in front of her and took a timid bite. It was good. “Sure… but one question.”
Celestia and Pinkie both looked at her.
Twilight swallowed as she levitated the makeshift pirate hat off of her head. “Why am I wearing a pirate hat?”
During the next reading of the story Twilight watched as her friends all got a lot closer to Luna than she expected. The only one to stay here with her was Pinkie Pie, which was perfectly fine because Pinkie was only trying to take Celestia away from her, which was totally not a problem at all, and she was cool with it. Super cool.
It was becoming increasingly clear that at least Pinkie had her eyes firmly on Celestia and with a few of her distracted leers she noticed Pinkie had eyes for parts of Celestia that Twilight was not at all comfortable thinking about, let alone letting Pinkie think about. Maybe Twilight was not actually cool with this at all.
Something had to be done.
As Celestia finished the story for the twelfth time her mind was feeling sharper, clearer again. No matter how far she went, or how much of her was lost that one story always brought her safely home from the seas of madness. In this case it brought her back from being a pirate and trying to take princess booty… a phrase that even she couldn’t believe she went around shouting at others.
Pinkie Pie had inched closer to Celestia during the reading. Her wide blue eyes staring up at the fabled princess of the sun. “Princess, I am sooooo looking forward to marrying you. You have no idea.”
Celestia gulped, her cheeks turned a lighter shade of pink. “Oh, thank you, Pinkie Pie.”
A pink hoof reached out and landed on top of Celestia’s. It was so small and fragile in comparison as it squeezed. All Twilight could see in her mind were various ways to set Pinkie Pie on fire and fling her out of the balcony. How dare she move in on her turf! Celestia’s face was turning a deeper shade of pink. Was she liking this?
Pinkie Pie spoke quietly. “You know, I haven’t heard anything about where we’re all sleeping for the next few days. I was hoping we could share the same bed.”
Celestia replied. “Pinkie, as flattering as that is, we are not married quite yet. I assure you my sister has gone through great lengths to set up a private room for each of you.”
Pinkie smiled and her eyes lowered. “Oh, could you, show me to my room? It’s a big ol’ castle and I might get lost.”
Warning signals flared in Twilight’s mind. Her horn lit up and Pinkie was lifted up into the air by a red aura. “Oh no, Luna looks super lonely. Go give her a hug and have her show you where your room is until she’s happy again!”
She almost threw Pinkie Pie across the room and at Luna as Pinkie giggled. For her part she somehow managed to twist midair and land on her forelegs facing Luna. Luna blinked down at Pinkie who excitedly said, “Show us to our rooms so you won’t be sad please!”
Luna stood from her position where she was holding Rarity awfully close to her. A few moments passed by before the group left and the door was left open behind them by Cadance who seemed reluctant to leave. Twilight couldn’t risk the pony of love and lust to interfere with her plan here. Twilight called out to her. “Cadance, I think my friends have some questions for you about the wedding. Pinkie doesn’t know you’re the one planning it does she?”
Cadance blinked. “No, but why should that matter.”
“Because she might be upset that she isn’t planning it herself. If she knows it’s you, she would probably be very happy about it because she planned your wedding after all.”
Cadance bit her lower lip. “You might be right about that… okay I’ll go tell her now. I’ll come back soon, because I think you’re going to need some lessons as much as Celestia here.”
As she left and the door shut behind her, there was a locking noise as a golden glow surrounded the handle. For a long moment both Twilight and Celestia were completely quiet. Neither of them spoke. In fact, Twilight glanced over to the bed and realized with more concern, they were completely alone.
Celestia laid her head down with a deflated sigh. “Oh, I’m so glad you're back to us, Twilight. I need your help.”
Twilight swallowed. She knew Celestia might need this, but she didn’t know how desperate she really was… no matter how scared Twilight was of intimacy, if it made Celestia feel even the tiniest bit better then she would sacrifice anything. Twilight nuzzled in. “I… I know. I’m sorry I kept you waiting. I honestly don’t know how to do any of that, b-but if you tell me what to do, I promise I’ll try my best… do I have to get on the bed or um…”
Celestia looked at her. “Only if you want. No, this is much more pressing than even I was aware of. Pinkie helped me realize how important this is.”
Oh no, Pinkie set her off, got her in the mood so to speak. Now she was alone with Twilight and needed to help release that tension. Curse you Pinkie. “I-I see. Well I’m here now, so um… what should I do?”
Celestia looked back at her. “Help me find a way to get out of this seven way marriage.”
That was not at all what Twilight was thinking she would say, but it was so much better than what Twilight thought she was about to have to do. She could at least wait until the wedding night to lose her precious virginity. For now, she needed to help Celestia… not get married?
“Wait, you don’t want to marry all of us?”
Celestia shook her head. “No, it was my sister’s idea.” Her eye opened a bit wide and she quickly added, “I of course want to marry you, when you are ready but this is not how I planned to do it.”
Something cracked inside of Twilight’s heart. It was small at first, just a small pain but it started to burn soon enough. She blinked but her eyes grew wet. She couldn’t help it as something broke and her cheeks ran wet with tears as a result.
Celestia straightened up and a gentle, warm wing tip brushed some of the tears away. “What’s wrong?”
“I thought, ‘sniff’ I thought you were doing this because I took too long. I thought you needed me… needed physical… intimacy and I was, I was willing, for you. I just…” Twilight let out a quiet sob. “You’re not hurt because I took so long?”
Celestia shook her head. “Of course not, I am over a thousand years old, my patience is infinite, and with you being immortal I can wait for as long as you need.”
Twilight sniffled. “I think… I think I can’t wait anymore.”
Celestia gently stroked Twilight’s back. “How long do you think you could wait?”
“I… I don’t know?” Twilight sniffled. “I don’t want to share you, so if I can I will help you not marry the others, but I… ready or not, I want to be with you. As soon as possible.”
Celestia’s body grew warmer still. Particularly near where her flank where it was touching Twilight’s. “I-I see… if it is that urgent, I could help… right now.”
Twilight looked up at her. “Really?”
“If it must be now.”
Twilight smiled. “I-I can wait for the marriage, but thank you.”
Celestia let out a sigh. Twilight had the suspicion maybe she wasn’t as ready as she acted. Though the warmth coming from Celestia’s flank was an odd one. She had never experienced that part of Celestia’s body being so hot before. Hopefully that was a good sign. Still Twilight pushed herself up. “How do we stop you from marrying all of my friends and only marry me instead?”
Celestia bit her lower lip. “I’m not sure. I fear if my sister’s wishes are completely denied she will return to her old self. Now seeing how much your friends frolic to her, and how much Pinkie enjoys my company I would feel bad for breaking their hearts… somehow we need to stop this but in a way that nopony can be hurt. Perhaps if they all thought it was their own idea?”
Twilight thought for a good moment. The gears turning in her mind. There was at least one pony out of that group that might be swayed into joining Team Twilight and Celestia; and that pony was Applejack. However, even she was seemingly growing close to Luna…
Twilight ruffled her mane with her hooves. “Ugh, after all those strange dreams we’ve all been having how are any of us supposed to not think about it?”
“Dreams?”
Twilight looked up at her. “For the past three months or so each of us have been having um… intimate dreams about the two of you. Sometimes the two of you um… at the same time… as Pinkie enjoys.”
***
Spike was busy walking down to Sweet Apple Acres. A bouncy white filly was next to him. Honestly, every time they went on these heroic adventures Spike always got left with cleanup duty. At least he’d mostly given up on the idea of dating Rarity now, mostly. With Rarity and Applejack doing their super not obvious thing, he kind of had too.
Still he found peace from that somehow and was able to focus on the other things in life. Art, philosophy, laughing at Twilight’s current predicament. Most of all he, Discord, and Big Mac had started to hang out. He was wondering if he should invite Discord to the Ogres and Oubliettes game… maybe not. Roleplaying only seemed to be a joke to Discord, but hey, he was pretty fun. According to Sweetie Belle he had tried to help her get her cutie mark. He may have failed but he himself earned a place as one of the CMC… somehow.
Discord’s life was confusing at the best of times. Still along his way he was thinking of something more important to say once he dropped off Sweetie with them. Since Sweetie Belle and Rarity’s parents were around two days of the year, mother’s day and then father’s day respectively, the plan was to drop the kid off where she’d be safely looked after by Big Mac and Granny Smith.
Actually he ended up staying with them most of the time too. Not that he needed too, just that he enjoyed the company. No, it wasn’t the task at hoof he was thinking about. It was how he was going to explain it. Exactly how did he explain to Big Mac and Granny smith, Applebloom, and Sweetie Belle that basically the Elements of Harmony were all going to be going to get princess groped soon? How indeed?
***
Celestia blinked. She had heard Luna say it straight to her face, but Twilight and her friends didn’t know. Perhaps that could be the weapon they needed to get the edge. If they found out they were being practically molested in their dreams, then they might grow to dislike the idea of the marriage… but that would only serve to sever the ties between them and Luna… hmm it might work, once.
Celestia could try it here and see how this plan of action might work. “What if I told you that those dreams you’ve had, were created by Luna as a way to… find out if you enjoyed her presence?”
Twilight looked up at her. “I’d… I’d… she invaded my dreams to do weird stuff to me and then have you do the same weird stuff sometimes, at the same time! Do you know what I dreamed you did with your tongue of all things?”
Celestia did not know, but she was imagining it now and cursing herself for almost wanting to have Twilight demonstrate it on the bed right then and there. Control, she must exert control over herself as she had for many centuries so far. Boring, lonely, frustrating, control.
Twilight blinked a few times. “But… but she liked it too… she liked kissing me…”
Yes, play on that. “OF course she did. She likes you, Twilight. As do I. However, going into your dreams to test that out was probably-“
“A relatively safe and harmless idea to gauge our interest levels. Yes I agree.” Twilight straightened up. “I might not be ready to actually try any of that but perhaps she was trying to teach me what I needed to know so our wedding could be… and she likes me on top of all of that. I… I still don’t want to share you but I can’t hurt Luna when she was willing to put her heart and self-esteem on the line. What if I had rejected her in my sleep, she would have been crushed.”
Oh… no.
Twilight let out a sigh. “This also means that all of my friends were… enjoying both you and Luna… I love them too, I don’t want to hurt them…. I’m not going to tell them Luna was the one to give us those dreams. But, Celestia, are you sure this… this can’t work somehow?”
Celestia smiled nervously. She had a plan and screwed it up so completely. Well there goes Twilight.
Luna was overjoyed to be leading her troop of brides down the halls. The royal wing of the castle was almost universally empty save for a few of the most elite guards, and the most loyal and quiet of servants. In fact each of the brides would be given a suitable servant and guard to accompany them.
One thing that surprised Luna, was Rarity. Once the mare had snuggled up to her side, it seemed she did not in fact want to leave it. Pinkie Pie had surprised her as well by taking Luna’s other flank and cozying up under her wings. This was a feeling Luna hadn’t enjoyed in nearly a thousand years when she had two young mares pressed up against her and going to her quarters for some interesting night games. This time, it was different though, it wasn’t just lust… it was deeper, warmer, and she could swear her mane was starting to shine brighter the closer these two got to her.
The few maids in the castle made barely a glance in their direction, not to be rude, but rather to give them a sense of privacy that was very much needed. In fact if Luna had decided to start an orgy right then and there with all six of them the maids were to simply clean around them. Of course even Luna was not that cruel, she’d seen their dreams and many of them had fantasies about Celestia, Luna, or both of them combined. It would be rude to force them to see such private acts when they may desperately want a piece of that pie themselves. If not for Celestia’s ruling on trying to appear modest, Luna likely would have given all of those servants their desire by now.
They met a long hall with six different doors all spaced well apart. Each one had a guard standing out in front of it and each room was tended to by a single maid whose role was not only to keep said rooms clean but to also fulfill any of the wishes of those inside.
Luna stopped at the first door. Upon it was the mark of Twilight Sparkle carved into the ancient purple wood. “This was Twilight’s room for many years while she studied beneath Celestia’s wing as a foal. Of course the place has been in disuse for several years now and it wasn’t exactly well used before hoof either. Twilight spent many nights with Celestia.”
Rarity gasped. “Truly?”
Luna smiled down at her. “Platonically of course. Nopony has yet to deflower that lavender. Celestia’s marriage will see to that changing soon enough.” There was only a small amount of envy in Luna for Celestia getting such a gift.
Going down to the next door she paused once more. This one had been yellow with a pink butterfly etched into its wood. “Fluttershy my dandere sweet, this shall be your quarters. Fret not for you shall be allowed to stay and read in my room all thou wish.”
Fluttershy walked to the door and gently reached out. “Um… is, is it okay if I g-go in? I feel I need to rest a little, um if that’s alright with you.”
Luna smiled down at her. “It is your room, you may come and go as you please, or decorate if you should choose. I did try to make the room to your liking but I fear my understanding of your tastes is not as developed as I hope it will be in the future.”
Fluttershy opened the door. A warm gentle light came in from a large wooden sealed window. The floor abruptly changed from marble to wood and the walls inside were much the same only covered in a soft yellow wallpaper. A large bed, plenty big enough for Luna to lay in was in the middle of the room. There was a fireplace, currently cold but well stocked. Shelves filled with books and paintings of various wildlife upon the walls. Fluttershy walked in and her eyes marveled around it. Upon the bed itself, a pink bed with yellow pillows, lay a large selection of stuffed animal dolls.
Fluttershy sat down once inside, her mouth agape as she took in the room. “What is this place? Filled with so many wonders?”
Luna gently closed the door behind her to allow the soft hearted pegasus a chance to recuperate her lost energy and to enjoy the room itself. If only Luna could have convinced actual animals to live in there it would be perfect she just hoped the fake ones were enough to make her happy.
The next door they came to was unsurprisingly a white one with dark purple diamond etched on it. Luna nodded for the appropriate mare to leave her side and venture forth. Once opening the door the gasp she heard made Luna’s heart soar.
Inside was a marbled floor with purple walls lined with thick red curtains. A few high quality photographs were on the wall showing off some of Rarity’s well known and favorite dresses, all by different designers of course to make sure Rarity never fell prey to staring at her own work too long but had ones she could look up to and admire. Finding out which ones were her favorites was a true challenge but one Luna successfully pulled off. A few poniquines stood near the window along with a seamstress desk including sewing machine, and a few select fabrics. The bed was set off more towards the wide of the room to allow for more practical space for any and all of Rarity’s machinations. Of course Luna was going to give the mare her very own room dedicated to the craft soon but inspiration had a chance to appear at any time and she knew the mare would be displeased having to walk all the way to a dedicated room just to create.
There was also an obvious door leading over to the next room, the one they had not reached yet.
Rarity turned back toward Luna. “This, this is so wonderful. You made this all for me?”
Luna smiled. “Of course I did. My love for the six of you knows no bounds.”
Rarity sniffled. “I… I wish there were words to show you how grateful I truly am.”
Luna winked. “There may not be words, but your lips can still tell me how grateful you are later.”
Rarity’s cheeks turned a tinge of pink. “Oh, yes, yes there are.”
Applejack coughed. “Rares.”
Rarity glared at her. “Applejack, just go to your room and fall in love already.”
Luna let out a sigh. She knew she was stepping on Applejack’s territory here but she hoped that Applejack would be more open later on. Sharing was challenging but with more ponies there was more chance for love, for fun, for mischief. Going to the next room, this one was specifically planned to be next door.
The orange door had a red apple on it revealing who it should belong to. Applejack pushed open the door and stepped inside. This was another room filled with wood, but it had a nice earthy scent. As if it had belonged here, for many, many years. The bed was large but far more simple in design. A few saplings were growing by the window seal and a small balcony led out to where a large apple tree was growing mightily. Applejack took off her hat at the sight of the tree. “Is that Lil Twig?”
Luna replied. “The sapling thou gave me when I first returned from the moon. A way for me to learn to grow and mature. A way for me to learn to be delicate with others. Without this tree I fear I may have remained in that tiny frail frame forever. Please don’t misunderstand, I am not giving Lil Twig back to thee, I am simply letting it meet you again. I shall continue to come and spend time with it.”
Applejack’s lip quivered and she put her hat back on covering her eyes. “Ah… thank you. Ah think maybe it ain’t so bad staying in a fancy palace after all.”
Luna glanced at the other door leading to Rarity’s room. “Don’t forget you have a door especially for you and Rarity. Should you two find need or use for it.”
Applejack looked back at her with a knowing look in her glistening eye. All Luna could do was smile and close the door on her. Hopefully by showing that she valued their previously existing relationship just as much as she valued the new one she wished to build, it would bridge any gap between herself and Applejack.
The next room of course had to be the blue one with the rainbow on it. Rainbow Dash laughed. “Guess this is mine then?” She opened the door and walked in only to look down at the floor as if to realize her hooves weren’t standing on carpet, or wood, or even marble. The soft squishy material beneath her hooves was in fact cloud. The walls, the ceiling, floors, and even the bed were all made from clouds. The few furnishings in here not made of the stuff were enchanted to sit upon them as easily as any pegasus. An armor stand stood with a suit of dark blue metal armor that shone brightly as the light cast its welcoming rays upon it.
Rainbow Dash looked back at her. “This is… cool. Like really cool.”
Luna giggled. “I would hope so. The suit of armor I am afraid is merely on loan for now. I wish to request Rarity’s assistance in crafting a suit that is perfect just for you, along with a magical weapon to suit your needs.”
Rainbow Dash swallowed. “You mean… like a knight?”
“Of course. A Wonderbolt, a knight, and a princess, there is no reason you cannot be all three at once.”
Rainbow Dash sat down. “That’s… that’s amaz-“ her voice was cut off as she saw the selection of books on the shelf nearby. She zipped over there so fast she left a trail of rainbow behind her. “No, no way! How! These are, are first edition signed copies of the entire Daring Doo series!”
“Of course they are, for my first edition wife.” Luna joked.
Rainbow Dash opened one and began reading. “I… and all I have to do is marry you for these?”
“Rainbow Dash you will be a princess soon. You deserve all the best things in the land. No mobster, rich stuck up mare, magically talented beast, dragon or even Discord himself could stop me from obtaining these books. Just… don’t take them outside of the royal quarters please, if they were to be stolen by somepony else I might have to hunt them down.”
Rainbow Dash stared at her working her mouth in silence for a long moment. “You did all that… for these books…”
“No, I did all of that for you.”
Rainbow Dash blinked. “Oh my Celestia, I think I am in love with you.”
“Yay!” Luna beamed.
As Rainbow Dash returned to her book Luna closed the door and went to the final room. A pink door with various pink balloons on it. “Pinkie Pie, this room shall be yours.”
Pinkie Pie opened the door and bounced in to find a carpeted floor. The carpet was a light blue with occasional yellow and pink spots. The bed was large and pink, and was trimmed off with designs of various sweets. The window seal was curved and had a particularly cake looking design to it. The table in the middle was large, and sturdy enough for even a mare of Luna’s size to dance on it. She had tested it herself. There was a button along the side of the wall, a big red button.
Pinkie quickly pushed it and revealed a secret passage going into another room. She stuck her head in there and then pulled it out saying, “I think every party supply in Equestria is in there!”
Luna smiled. “I hope this is to your liking. If there are any changes you need, please do not hesitate to make them.”
Pinkie frowned. “Well… it is missing something. Something pretty important.”
That one sentence was almost enough to stop Luna’s heart. What had she forgotten? Was it a pet alligator toy? No she wouldn’t need that once she brought the real Gummy here. Was it a mini fridge? No wait there was one in the corner along with an entire stove, cupboards, and pretty much anything the mare needed for cupcakes. A balcony? No everypony had their own balcony even if the entrance was a little hidden at first. What was it she missed?
Pinkie Pie looked up at Luna with soft blue eyes. “It’s missing you.”
Luna’s heart… it was supposed to be beating right? Why wasn’t it doing that? Not that it mattered, it wouldn’t kill her to have a heart attack. She took a few steps into the room, closed the door behind her and felt her lip trembling as she whispered. “I am here now.”
Pinkie Pie beamed a smile larger than her face. “Now it’s perfect!”
There was a knock at the door and Luna quickly opened it to reveal the pink alicorn mare with whom she and Pinkie were both very familiar with. Cadance stared at them, her lips curling up into a sly smile. Luna looked at Pinkie noticing the stains of black lipstick left upon her cheeks and neck. A quick glance into the nearby mirror revealed that Luna’s face and neck were in a similar state only with pink lipstick instead.
Cadance’s voice took on a playful tone as she said, “I see you two are having fun getting to know one another.”
Luna’s horn lit up and both she and Pinkie were instantly cleaned of any incriminating evidence. “We have no idea what-“
Pinkie waved a hoof and spoke, “Nah, we were just making out, touching each other, and doing normal married pony stuff.”
With a defeated sigh Luna added, “Pretty much, yeah…”
Cadance walked in and closed the door to Pinkie’s chambers behind her. “Oh come on you two, I’m not nearly so stuffy as Auntie Celestia. I’m happy you two are taking the time to explore now. What would happen if you went through with the marriage only to find out you weren’t sexually attracted to each other? Oh my the horror.”
As much as Luna wanted to go into details about how ferocious and wonderful a kisser Pinkie Pie was her mind was otherwise preoccupied with the details of their upcoming wedding. The pony who was going to be responsible for most of those was sitting right before them. Luna made her way to the table and took a seat in front of it, Pinkie Pie bounced over to join by her side and snuggled in as Luna wrapped a wing around her. A moment later Cadance had joined them her horn glowed as a set of folders landed on the table.
Cadance explained. “Since this time I’m in charge of planning the royal wedding, the reception, and hopefully only one party, I want to get some advice from the number one party pony, and make sure everything is up to standards.”
Pinkie Pie blinked. “Wait… I don’t get to plan the party?”
“Well… um…”
Pinkie’s mane deflated a little and her ear twitched. “But, I’m the number one party pony.”
***
Sweet Apple Acres was generally speaking, a fairly quiet place yet today seemed somewhat odd. There was a giant apple tree, at least fifty feet tall growing out of the field somewhere near the house. Spike was sure he hadn’t seen such a monstrosity of a tree before. Sweetie Belle seemed to be interested as well making for the two of them almost running towards it in excitement.
Once at the base of it Spike was only mildly surprised to see Derpy there. She was sitting in front of the tree and petting it as though it could feel her. Off to the side was the stallion who always seemed to be with her, the one known as the Doctor despite his cutie mark being an hourglass. Some had given him a much more normal name of Time Turner, unfortunately it didn’t stick.
Walking up to Derpy Spike gave a low whistle. “What happened here?”
Derpy shrugged. “I just don’t know what went wrong.”
The Doctor trotted over and beamed. “Nothing is wrong, we simply made a slight miscalculation and instead of shrinking the tree to a one hundredth of its normal size, we grew the tree by one hundred times its size.”
Sweetie Belle chimed in. “Why were you trying to shrink it?”
The Doctor replied. “Why for science of course. If we could shrink the tree, it would make for planting apple trees across Equestria far easier than ever before.”
Derpy added. “And now we’ve accidentally solved world hunger instead.”
The Doctor laughed, it was a warm hearty laugh that had a strangely calming effect on those around him. Even Spike felt it, though he always thought the fact it was so effective was a little creepy. “Oh, my faithful assistant, world hunger was solved ages ago. Of course the problem came to politics. Not very many other countries are trusting of a group of small colorful horses and their god queen of a ruler. You know most countries have mortal leaders that change every so often.”
Spike scratched at the back of his head. “Weird, must be hard remembering who’s in charge.”
The Doctor put a hoof to his chin and thought. “Now that is an odd thing to think of. They never seem to have any problem remembering but for a creature living with a single ruler for over a thousand years it would be confusing. I suppose the best equivalent is, do you get confused by the addition of Twilight and Luna to the royal hierarchy or is that easy to remember?”
“Considering that Twilight is literally my mom, no.”
Sweetie Belle raised her hoof. “Oh, oh!”
The Doctor pointed a hoof at her. “And you Sweetie?”
“I get confused all the time, I didn’t’ even know Princess Cadance existed until long after the royal wedding!”
The Doctor laughed. “Well, I suppose that could be our case study for-“
Derpy interrupted. “Doctor, I don’t mean to interrupt but I think those apples up there got bigger as well.”
The Doctor laughed. “Nonsense, what harm could larger apples-“
A loud thud sounded as an apple half his size landed right next to him imbedding itself a foot into the earth. “-do… ah, gravity… my old nemesis.” He walked over to where a doctor’s bag sat and brought out a potion in his mouth. The liquid inside was a bubbling green color. He walked over to the tree and poured the liquid out on the base of the tree.
Spike watched in awe as the tree began to shrink. It continued to shrink until it was more or less the size of a normal apple tree once more.
Big Mac, Applebloom and Granny Smith appeared from the woods nearby just as the tree finished shrinking. Applebloom was pointing with a hoof saying, “This is where Ah saw the giant tree!”
Big Mac smiled around the piece of hay in his mouth, his eyes met the Doctor’s and they passed each other a knowing look as if some kind of secret code was being sent. Granny Smith looked around. “Well the ground sure is torn up, but Ah don’t see no giant tree.”
Big Mac smiled. “Nope.”
Spike had to stifle a laugh as he watched Applebloom attempt to get them to believe that there really was a giant apple tree here. Soon she started to question her own logic and fell silent soon after that. The poor filly was going to think she was hallucinating for the rest of her life.
Spike jumped up. “Oh hey! I have to drop off Sweetie Belle with you guys.”
He and Sweetie walked over to where the apple family was. Sweetie Belle and Applebloom hugged while shrieking, “SLEEP OVER!”
Granny Smith smiled at them then looked at Spike. “What’s the occasion this time? Another monster?”
Spike waved his hand. “Nah, nothing too serious. Luna and Celestia just declared their intentions to marry the elements of harmony and so they're up in Canterlot getting ready for what I am pretty sure is going to be a secret wedding.”
Granny Smith nodded. “That’s good to hear… wait… did you say they were marrying the elements of harmony, as in…”
Big Mac added. “All of them?”
Spike nodded and couldn’t hide a giggle. “Yep, it’s an eight-way marriage.”
Granny Smith swallowed. “Ah knew sometimes ponies might join a herd but this is absurd.”
Big Mac sat down. “All of them?”
The Doctor and Derpy were nearby enough to hear the conversation. Derpy added thoughtfully, “Oh wow! From what The Doctor says Princess Celestia hasn’t had that much action in a thousand years.”
The Doctor chuckled. “Ah yes, back when the royal harem still existed. It was quite the spectacle. There were bananas and whipped cream raining from the sky, Luna’s tentacles grabbed any mildly interested mare, and beds were catching on fire, quite literally. Rumors suggest this was how Queen Chrysalis was born.
“Needless to say there is a good reason the harems themselves were disbanded. A marriage though should prove far less tempting but perhaps more stable. I’m sure Celestia and Luna will love them all.”
Derpy put a hoof to her chin. “I don’t know how that can work. I can only fall in love with one pony.”
Big Mac was still sitting there stunned. “All of them…”
***
Cadance felt bad for Pinkie Pie. Twilight had been right, Pinkie was not pleased with the revelation that she could not in fact plan her own royal wedding. It was against the rules, if this had been a normal wedding sure, but a royal wedding required a dedicated wedding planner. Aka, Cadance. Luckily she did have a plan for it. “Pinkie, you planned my wedding and it was so great. I want to be able to give back to you as well and make a wedding for the eight of you that will be just as good. Besides, it wouldn’t be much of a surprise if you planned it yourself now would it?”
Pinkie’s ear twitched again. Her mane bounced and she smiled. “Now that makes sense! Okie Dokie Lokie, I don’t like not planning parties but I do like surprises and you're right. If anypony should plan my wedding, why not you!”
At least Pinkie was willing to allow her the chance. She was terrified maybe the pink pony had a secret evil form locked away. She imagined Pinkie losing her mind, laughing hysterically as her pupils shrank and her hair went completely straight. She’d talk to random inanimate objects as if they were real ponies. Following that she would kidnap random ponies, lock them in her basement and use surgical tools to remove wings, horns, and eyeballs to make party accessories from them, the rest of the pony becoming a delicious new cupcake treat in Ponyville…
No, that was too extreme. It wasn’t like Pinkie pie was as scary as Twilight. She’d probably just get sad and cry… oh no, that sounded even worse.
Cadance stood up. “I swear I will make it the best party you’ve ever had!”
Pinkie Pie giggled. “I’m not mad, I’m excited! Nopony ever plans parties for me, and when they do they don’t tell me. So I’m happy you’re telling me ahead of time.”
Cadance let out a sigh. “Oh thank goodness.”
Pinkie Pie let out a quiet sigh. “I also have read up on how the parties for a royal wedding work. They're not as flexible as I need… not as flexible as me anyway.” She gave a knowing wink to Luna.
Cadance watched as Luna’s tail wagged and her cheeks turned a brighter shade. Was she blushing? Could Luna blush underneath that dark coat? It was just too cute to imagine. It also meant that Luna couldn’t be left alone with Pinkie too long… otherwise…
Cadance rose to her hooves. “I’m sure you two have plenty to do later on, but for now I fear I need Luna’s help with some of the plans. Ones that will be a surprise for you.”
Pinkie groaned. “Awww, but I was just barely getting a taste, and I wanted to try finding out if the moon was really made of cheese!”
Luna blinked. “Cheese… well… parts of it, might be.”
Pinkie gasped. “REALLY!”
“When you are stuck on the moon for a thousand years, one comes up with the strangest hunger for cheese.”
Cadance smiled as she wrapped her aura gently around Luna tugging her slightly toward the door. “Come now, Auntie. We have plans to discuss.” She noticed that tail rising again and instantly dropped the aura. Right, rule number one of Luna, no magic on her unless you want to give her an instant orgasm, again.
Luna shook her head and walked toward the door. “Of course, plans and things, we are good at both.”
As they left Pinkie Pie pleaded. “Please come back soon!”
The door closed behind them and Cadance let out a sigh of relief. She had heard the rumors of what it was like when Luna beds a pony, she feared the collateral damage could only be dealt with after the wedding. Before hoof would be a challenge. As they walked away Cadance realized Luna’s tail was still swishing playfully. It was good to see her happy, now she did have an actual topic to discuss with Luna and it was going to be a fun one.
Cadance glanced over at her as they passed a yellow door that was cracked open. “Now, what kind of sexy lingerie are you planning to wear on the night of the wedding?”
Luna looked at her. “Lingerie? I did not think I needed such things.”
“Oh, Luna, you’re marrying these fine beautiful ponies, some of which have never been intimate before, I’m sure you want to make their wedding night the best night ever. Don’t you?”
Luna nodded. “Yes, of course. What should I wear then?”
Cadance nearly jumped for joy at that sentence. “Let’s dress you up and find out. Oh and we should drag Celestia along too, maybe even Twilight!”
Luna beamed. “Capital idea! They will enjoy the sexy attire I am sure!”
Celestia and Twilight didn’t have to sneak through the castle. They were both princesses and the Royal Wing was always almost empty. It was more of a choice in an attempt to avoid any unnecessary engagements with Luna. When they passed a corner once and heard Cadance and Luna talking they knew they needed to hide. Shoving themselves into a nearby closet proved useful, and intimate. Celestia found herself pressed up hotly against Twilight’s side, her flank brushing against the smaller mare’s. Celestia cursed herself for enjoying the sensation. She cursed herself more for imagining pressing other parts of her body against her.
They listened with bated breath.
Cadance sounded very excited. “Let’s dress you up and find out. Oh and we should drag Celestia along too, maybe even Twilight!”
Luna’s voice was filled with joy. “Capital idea! They will enjoy the sexy attire I am sure!”
As the two alicorns walked past continuing their conversation of lingerie Celestia felt her body growing warmer still. She hadn’t even considered the idea of what she would wear to bed. She had some nightgowns which proved to be very attractive in the far distant past. Her last husband had enjoyed them but that was so, so long ago… had those fallen out of favor for sexually attractive nightwear?
Twilight’s face was a blush of pink. She was probably imagining herself in those kinds of clothing… or judging by the fact she was rubbing her flank against Celestia’s as her tail end was unable to stop wiggling, she was imagining Celestia in them… somehow Celestia felt the idea more flattering than revolting. Still she purged the thought from her mind and opened the door. They both left the closet quietly and made their way down the hall.
Twilight paused at the sight of her old room. “Celestia, would I be staying here?”
Celestia frowned. “Only if you want.”
Twilight glanced back at her. “And if I wanted to stay with you…”
Celestia looked away. “I… wouldn’t stop you.”
Twilight nearly jumped after her as Celestia walked down the hall looking for the door they wanted. They found the orange door with the apple symbol on it. Celestia reached over with a hoof and pushed the door open. “Applejack, I wish to discuss some details of the-“
There on the bed, was a tangled mess of alabaster fur against orange. Limbs wrapped around each other. Tongues in places they should not be. Any sign of a well made bed long since utterly destroyed by the pair.
Rarity looked over and her eyes widened in horror. “Oh Celestia!”
Applejack was too busy with what she was doing with her mouth to notice. “Ah know you like it, but calling her name in the middle of this feels a mite awkward right now.”
Rarity pushed herself off the mare. “No, I mean Celestia and Twilight!”
Applejack gave her an incredulous look. “Using Twilight’s name in the middle feels more awkward.” She looked at Rarity’s eyes then followed them to the door and nearly shouted, “Oh Celestia!”
Celestia blinked, trying her hardest to get the mind bleach to work. It had to work. She didn’t want to see this. Even if she could use this to her advantage she didn’t want to… wait, did Luna know? These two were in a previous engagement of some kind and did Luna know? A cruel plot crept over Celestia’s mind. Her face remained unchanged, in fact she only offered a motherly smile and said, “My little ponies. I see we interrupted something private. My apologies but could we have you wait in your proper room, Rarity?”
Rarity quickly leapt off the bed and trotted to the door leading to her room. Apparently, Luna had installed secret entrances to each of the rooms. There was one off to the side hidden in the wall panel that Celestia could spy which would lead to Rainbow Dash’s.
Celestia walked in and nodded for Twilight to follow.
When Twilight didn’t she took a proper look at the mare. Twilight was still staring at Applejack with wide bugged out eyes. Her jaw dropped. Wings flared out and rigid… oh… Celestia wrapped her golden aura around Twilight lifted her up like a statue and placed her inside before closing the door.
“Now, Applejack, my betrothed. I did not expect to see you and Rarity already practicing for the wedding night.”
Applejack cleared her throat. “Uh… yeah… um… we were uh, wrestling.”
“Interesting, I have not seen such techniques employed in the sport. The thing you did with your tongue and mouth seemed very effective at stopping your opponent, though with Rarity on top I feel maybe she was winning.”
Applejack’s entire face turned as red as the apples on her rump. “Ayep!”
Twilight Sparkle finally spoke. “That was wrestling!”
Applejack looked to Twilight, back to Celestia, and then finally at Twilight. “Um… ayep.”
Twilight sat down. “Oh goodness. I didn’t know wrestling was so… um… I can see why Rainbow Dash enjoys it. Maybe I should pick up the sport myself.”
Celestia gave Twilight a level stare. “Twilight, you cannot be that innocent can you?”
Twilight looked up at her. “I don’t understand. If Applejack says that was wrestling I have to believe her. She is the element of honesty after all and that means she can’t lie.”
Applejack nodded. “Ayep.”
Twilight then looked at Applejack. “Can you teach me to wrestle?”
Applejack’s face turned redder. “Nope.”
Twilight frowned and lowered her head. “Oh… okay…”
Applejack looked down at the floor. “Now don’t be like that, Sugarcube. Ah’m sure Celestia will teach you all that soon enough.”
Twilight jumped up. “Really!”
Celestia resisted the urge to facehoof, only by sheer willpower alone. “Twilight, they weren’t wrestling.”
“But she just said-“
“They were making love.”
Twilight blinked. “Like what Cadance does?”
“With her husband, yes.”
Applejack groaned. “Consarn it, Twilight. Ah know yer still recovering from your mental meltdown but even you got to know that was sex.”
Twilight’s face dropped into a shade of dark red. “That, that was… but who’s the stallion?”
Applejack groaned. “Princess, Ah am willing to do anything to avoid having to have this talk with Twilight right now.”
Twilight paced back and forth. “But wait, neither of you are stallions, so how would you put a thing inside the place? Sex isn’t supposed to involve your mouth down there. This doesn’t make any sense. My books about breeding and how babies are made do not cover this.”
Celestia smiled. “Applejack, I will leave Twilight in your oh so capable hooves for a few minutes.”
Applejack jumped out of the bed. “Please, don’t!”
Celestia smiled. “I might be willing to take her back on a few conditions.”
Twilight added. “How did she get her whole mouth to-“
Applejack pleaded. “Anything!”
Celestia walked over and stared down into Applejack’s eyes. “Tell me, are you and Rarity in love?”
She nodded.
“And does Luna know?”
“Ah reckon she has an idea. She purposely put doors here for me and her.”
Celestia wanted to reach out and gently stroke that orange cheek of hers but considering the stickiness of it she thought better. “You need to talk to her about it. If you don’t love my sister, and love Rarity instead, would it not be cruel to marry her when she doesn’t know any better?”
Applejack looked at her hooves. “Ah… Ah reckon so, but won’t she be mad if Ah tell her Ah’m not into marrying her?”
Celestia smiled. “She might be upset, but there are plenty of others here who do want to marry her, if you and Rarity want to keep your interests to a more private party than I believe she would understand. Please, try and talk to her. If you do that then-“ she nodded toward Twilight.
Twilight for her part was still talking to herself. “If Pinkie Pie can dislodge her jaw to open that wide and with her monstrous tongue, does that make her better or worse at-“
“I’ll take her off your hooves.”
Applejack pawed at the wooden floor. “Ah… Ah will talk to her.”
Celestia smiled. “Good, I do respect your honesty. If you do decide to go through with this marriage to us I will be honored to call you my wife.” Celestia lifted Twilight up in her aura and sat the mare down upon her back. The moment Celestia did she realized that was a mistake… a shower was going to be needed posthaste.
Celestia left the room with the one intent in mind. Taking a bath and perhaps washing Twilight’s mind clean of her now curious and dirty thoughts. The poor dear was far from ready for such activities, even if her body was begging for it.
***
It wasn’t until much later that evening Luna and Cadance had gotten done with their clothing hunt. A particularly nice set of nightwear had been selected for the princess of the night. Maybe she should be referring to it as daywear instead as that would be more likely her time to lie down and bed whichever pony or ponies she was with that morning. There was one problem with this whole day, and it was that Luna was starting to grow exhausted. Ever since Celestia rudely awoken her for the last time she just couldn’t sleep again. So she now waited for the dinner/breakfast to begin. There would a crowd of ponies here this time instead of merely her sister.
A full meal… how long had it been since she sat at a table with a group of ponies to eat? Even as a foal ponies had a tendency to shy away from them. Her and Celestia had always been a little distant and lonely. Was it possible that times were about to change, that instead of the quiet and lonely meals that they would have full, family oriented affairs. Loved ones surrounding them, never to be truly alone again…
Somehow Luna’s heart ached as she thought about it despite how happy it made her. All her life she knew she’d been missing out on something so simple. As she watched families enjoy their evening meals together when spying on them, she always knew the quiet of their castles, the distance of their servants, and even the temporary fickle love of their harems were all wrong. She wanted so much more from this world, to have something she’d never gotten and always wanted.
When she heard the dinner bell ring in her room she jumped up ready and willing to join. The small lamp she had brought in here from one of the guest rooms was thankfully turned off but it was here for if anypony needed to visit her again. Maybe after dinner.
Luna’s horn lit up and she teleported to the dining room right away. The table, for the first time since she’d come back from the moon was full. Not only of a delicious dinner/breakfast, but also of life. There were a total of nine other ponies in here this time. And Luna’s heart soared as they all looked to her and her sudden appearance.
Luna took the empty seat at the long end of the table. On her left sat the pink bundle of joy, on the right sat the lovely Rarity. Over on Celestia’s side of the table she was flanked by Twilight and Applejack. She was glad to see Twilight was looking rather like her usual self, no pirate hats, no split ends on her mane, and no manic looks in her eyes. Instead her cheeks were still a tinge of pink as she stared at Celestia.
Next to Pinkie Pie sat Rainbow Dash and then Fluttershy. Between Rarity were the familiar sights of Shining Armor and Cadance. This was a full dining room to say the least. A few different conversations were already taking place and Luna was unable to easily follow any of them. Not through lack of skill but rather her excitement to listen to all of them at once had made it challenging to focus on but one.
This was going to be a dinner to remember.
Chapter Fourteen: When Hidden Romances Turn to Dinner Prances
Chapter Fourteen: When Hidden Romances Turn to Dinner Prances
Written by TheCrimsonDM
It was in all reality this was Celestia’s favorite time of the day, well her second favorite. Her first being breakfast/dinner. Dinner/breakfast was great as well. For Celestia the table was filled with all the delights a princess rightfully deserved. From select cuts of salted salmon to the creamiest of mashed potatoes. Cake was a must at every meal and this one was no exception with the cake in question standing in the middle of the table nearly as tall as any of the ponies here. More toward Luna’s side there were hay waffles, apple pie, pancakes, eggs and hay bacon.
It was only a more recent tradition that more of the succulent items had been removed due to cultural changes. She still recalled the favor of real bacon and fried chicken. It was three hundred, no three hundred and fifty years ago that those items became taboo in Equestria. This led to the loss of a lot of the more carnivorous members of Equestria, as they found new homes usually secreted away. With the return of bat-ponies the options might start coming back though, with luck it would only take another hundred years or so before meat returned properly. For now she still had fish, and anypony foolish enough to take that away would rue the day they were born under the rulership of the Princess of the Sun.
Of course there was one small catch with that; Fluttershy.
Thankfully the cuts of salted salmon looked nothing like a fish but the smell of fish was always unmistakable. She feared that the animal lover was going to have a heart attack once she noticed. Instead what happened was stranger still. The mare actually took a few slices for herself, smelled them, and then smiled. She knew exactly what they were. Of course she would, didn’t she feed salmon to her pet otters? And where would she get those fish from if not from the marketplace?
This made Celestia smile. What other oddities did the tiny mare hide? Perhaps she too enjoyed the flavor of the heartier foods. The taboo, and the strange. The wicked and the forbidden. Or was fish where she drew the line? At least they didn’t have caviar… actually that would be a mistake for the chefs. Fish eggs were particularly unwanted by Celestia and Luna. They both remembered the days where fish eggs as well as lobsters were considered peasant food before some noble thought it funny to serve it among his peers… to which those peers responded by passive aggressively serving it among more. The circle of passive aggressive food gestures continued until nopony remembered why they had caviar and the price of said item despite being so common was absolutely ridiculous.
Honestly, some days Celestia wanted to go to one of those higher class functions, and pour ketchup and baked beans all over the caviar just to watch the disgruntled faces of nobles as they watched her eat them. Only to then turn baked beans and ketchup into a rare commodity by the end of the century.
Luna had suggested the jest could become worse once they realized what effects baked beans would have on social gatherings. The noise and smell were both things the two princesses did not care for. So it was decided they would go with just the ketchup when they enacted the plan to eradicate caviar from noble dinners.
Everypony had at this point grabbed at least some food to place on their respective plates. Somehow Pinkie Pie had remained careful not to get caught eating any of the food on her plate. Though Celestia was sure that the mare was at least nibbling on it when not being directly looked at.
Since they were waiting for Luna, Cadance brought up a conversation topic that made everypony a bit quiet. “Celestia, who are we inviting for the wedding?”
Celestia let out a sigh. This was something she had thought about for some time and she already had her answer. “Not many. In fact, very few ponies are going to be at the actual wedding, considering the sensitivity of it. With that said, we will host a more public ceremony for our mutual wives families and friends. Twilight’s parents excluded.”
Shining Armor bit his lower lip and looked down at his plate, but otherwise said nothing. Cadance spoke up in his stead. “You’re not inviting Twilight’s parents?”
Celestia huffed. “And why should I? They’ve probably talked to me more times than they have their own daughter in the past ten years of her life. No, I’m the only mother she needs to be there.”
Cadance allowed a small smile to creep over her lips. “And yet you’re marrying her.”
Celestia met Cadance’s eyes with a glare that promised eternal torment if she pushed the subject further. Honestly it wasn’t just their distance from Twilight that made Celestia dislike them. It was the dread, the absolute terror they held in their eyes when they saw Twilight, the way they flinched around her when she moved too quickly forcing Twilight to move slow, and awkwardly, not at all like her usual free and awkward self. No parent should fear their child, and that was why Celestia wasn’t going to invite them.
Twilight spoke up and said something that surprised Celestia. “I’m okay if they don’t show up. All I need is Celestia, Shining, and Cadance.” She didn’t have to explain what she needed them for, they all knew she meant that she only needed those three for family. Yet looking around it was clear to Celestia that Twilight had so much more family than she ever did before, all of these loving mares, plus Luna.
For the first time since she’d heard about the multiple marriages, Celestia wondered if perhaps she should really be trying to stop it at all? Family… how long had it been since Celestia considered the idea for either herself or her sister?
Once Luna appeared and grabbed some food of her own the dinner could commence. Celestia had originally been somewhat concerned with what Luna would think of such a crowded dining room, but the look in Luna’s eyes, the smile on her lips and the relaxed nature of her body all told Celestia she was happy. Truly happy. In fact Celestia couldn’t remember ever seeing Luna so at home when having dinner or breakfast, or the varying combinations of the two.
Looking around herself she tried to figure out exactly what it was that had changed. The room was full of life, of laughter and of ponies talking. Whether it was Pinkie Pie telling some outrageous silly story that ended in a joke. Cadance and Shining Armor speaking of more mundane tasks in the Crystal Empire. A quiet conversation between Fluttershy and Twilight about animals. Rainbow Dash striking a heroic pose and proclaiming her awesomeness to the world. Or Rarity captivating Luna’s attention with a smile and a few modest words. The room was full.
For the first time in many, many centuries the lonesome room had broken away to a group of friends, potential lovers, and family. Warmth and laughter, love and light filled the air. There was not a single thing out of place here, nothing was strange or wrong. In fact, Celestia only came to realize it then, but every single meal before this one tonight had been the wrong one. Neither Celestia nor Luna had much experience with close friendly dinners. The only ones Celestia went to were political and always a game of cat and mouse or shadowed daggers, but this was just the opposite of any of those. Nopony here cared about the politics, none were trying to squeeze Celestia for a new law or for some funding. They were here, all by request, and simply having fun enjoying the atmosphere.
The way Luna looked in this setting, it was almost like seeing Luna happy for the first time since they were foals. Or at least since she was freed from the clutches of Nightmare Moon. The one and only other time Luna and Celestia had such a private dinner with these mares…
The feeling Celestia got in her chest was like being stabbed by a sharp jagged blade. Could it be that Luna had truly cared for these mares all these years, that she had hidden such feelings even from Celestia and wanting something as simple as a dinner with them? If that was true, was Celestia doing as she had always done and neglecting her sister’s needs?
She still wanted out of the forced marriage but perhaps she could invite these mares over for more casual dinners or breakfasts or both in the future. Surely that would help heal any wounds left in either of their hearts… as for Twilight, well… Celestia had to accept that eventually she was going to have to take care of that promise. When she did maybe that too would help Luna’s loneliness… or hers for that matter.
A warm nuzzle from her side revealed Twilight who was rubbing her face into Celestia’s side. Celestia lowered a wing around the sweet mare. “Yes, Twilight?”
Twilight nuzzled up and buried her face into Celestia’s side. “Mmm, n-nothing.”
Celestia let out a little sigh. It was surprisingly nice to feel somepony so interested in her. Nopony seemed to be staring either so maybe this would be okay… tonight she was going to… what was she going to do tonight? Her head felt like it was spinning. Thoughts of all the images Cadance had shown her were running through her head. She couldn’t get Twilight out of her mind.
Twilight pulled back a little and looked up. “Um, Celestia… you’re getting really warm.”
Celestia swallowed. “Yes, yes I am.”
From across the table she caught Luna’s eye. The mare had noticed what was going on and it felt almost as if Luna could read her mind. This would not do. She had to do something about this.
Applejack was finished with the main portion of her meal and had moved on to the slice of apple pie. She gave it a whimsical smile and rolled her eyes. She took one bite and her eyes widened. She chewed a few times and then swallowed. “This… this is as good as Granny Smiths!”
Luna called over to her. “Well, I did have your Grandmother teach me to make it. In her dreams I asked for directions and although it took some time I am confident in my skills to bake this one single dish.”
Applejack looked over to her. “You baked this pie? Not one of yer servants, but you?”
Luna grinned. “Even I can do my own cooking sometimes.”
Applejack looked down at the pie and swallowed. “Ah think mah family has a rule about having to marry a pony if they can bake this well.”
Rarity called back. “See, I told you that Luna would make the most wonderful wife.”
Celestia stared down at her. Oh crap… there goes that plan. Applejack finished the pie and stood up. “Excuse me fer a moment.” She walked over to where Luna was and stared up into those big bright eyes. “Do you think we could… have a talk somewhere quiet?”
Luna smiled down at her, and the smile was returned. “Of course my love.”
Celestia watched as those two walked away from the dinner table. Hopeful that should they return some kind of compromise was formed but after the pie, she was doubtful it would be. Her hopes for ending this marriage were being dashed one by one.
With Twilight continuously nuzzling her side, she was getting other feelings that she really, really didn’t want. She was trying her best to ignore them. Pinkie Pie was at least the only pony here to break Celestia away from those maddening thoughts. “So, Princess Celestia! What was the worst Gala you ever had? Was it the one we went to?”
A story, yes, an excellent distraction. Celestia rose and chuckled. “No, no, there was one that was far worse. One that has been stricken from any of the records but a select few speak of in hushed rumors to this day. The gala where everypony was turned into a frog.”
***
It was a challenge for Luna to keep her smile on her face when she was terrified. Hearing that her beloved apple wanted to speak with her in private had sent shivers down her spine. What if she had crossed a line? Would Applejack be angry with her? All Luna desired was to bring as much joy to these ponies as they had done to her. She thought making apple pie would be a gesture of love not an insult… perhaps this was one of the many things she misunderstood.
Once in the hallway and the door closed behind them Applejack turned to face her. There was a serious look in those eyes and it made Luna want to breakdown and beg the freckled cutie for forgiveness. Of course as a ruler of Equestria she couldn’t do that… just yet.
Applejack let out a sigh. “Sorry about dragging you out here like that, Luna.”
Luna shook her head. “It’s quite alright. There is much to discuss and not nearly enough time to do so.”
Applejack took a step forward. “Yer right about that. This here wedding… you seem to have done yer research on all of us.”
Luna smiled and nodded. “Of course I have. For many years now I have watched you, all of you, wishing that even one of you would return my gaze. Now all of you have taken notice and… Applejack, is something wrong?”
Applejack shook her head. “Nothing… Ah just was thinking. You know me and Rarity aren’t just friends right?”
“Of course not, you two share a bond deeper than any of the others, though you had secreted that bond for some time now. I fear I do not understand why. Rarity doesn’t seem the type to want to hide such things.”
Applejack lowered her had to cover her eyes. “She didn’t. Ah did…”
“But why? Doth thou not approve of her?”
Applejack shook her head. “Ah don’t know. Ah guess Ah don’t want others thinking Ah’m not as tough as Ah look. Listen, you know Ah’m kinda the head of the household. Ah’m in charge of the farm and mah family even if Big Mac is older than me, he’s too sensitive fer such things.”
Luna nodded. “I understand. It is a trait I most admire about you. How strong you are in the face of such hardships. How much value you hold for the ones you love.”
Applejack smiled. “Ah ain’t all that strong though… Ah’m weak, and Ah’m scared all the time of losing the farm. If we don’t make enough each year the farm could go into debt, if’n it does… well Ah reckon we might not recover.”
Luna nodded. “Once you are a princess those will no longer be concerns for you to worry about.”
Applejack lifted her hat. “Ah don’t want to marry you just fer money. Ah’m afraid… what if Ah don’t really like you, what if Ah am just using you and Ah somehow tricked myself into liking you? Makes me feel awful.”
Luna lowered herself to the ground so that she could look directly into Applejack’s eyes. “Listen my dear. I have seen your dreams, I have seen your nightmares. There were times that those Flim Flam phonies tried taking your farm and I have stood there to keep it safe with you by my side. Even if just a dream, I know of your hardships.
“I admit that I also know you feel more for Rarity than you do for me now. I would hope that in time, you begin to love me as much as you do her. We will have time for that to blossom, but I know this. I know you’d never use me for power or gain.”
Applejack’s smile wavered for a moment. “You trust me that much?”
“I do, and I love you. With all my heart and soul I love you. I just ask for thou to give me the chance to enter thy heart as thou hast mine.”
Applejack nodded. “Ah… Ah can do that. After all, ain’t nopony besides Rares ever try to learn to cook apple pie just for me. And Rarity even failed.”
Luna laughed. “Well, let’s not tell her that, now shall we?”
Applejack nodded. “Sounds good to me.”
***
They came back into the room and Celestia’s heart soared. At least until Applejack took a seat next to her and looked up saying, “She’s okay with me and Rarity.”
Celestia felt a cold shiver run down her spine as she looked at her sister. The sly smile growing over her lips told her that Luna knew exactly what she had tried to do, and the fact that Celestia failed only made her happy. Oh… tonight was going to be a long one.
Chapter Fifteen: When Waiting Thieves Steal the Eve
Chapter Fifteen: When Waiting Thieves Steal the Eve
Written by TheCrimsonDM
What was Fluttershy doing? There was a perfectly safe guard at her door waiting to help her with whatever and she also had a personal servant… someplace. So why did she sneak out of her room and go into the castle by her lonesome?
Maybe she broke, just like Twilight. The idea of the forced marriage was too hard for her fragile little mind and now she was brave all of a sudden. Hearing the hoofsteps from around the corner she hid in a nearby closet. Nope, not brave…
Then it must have been the second part. The thing she did not wish to speak of. Yet the part that intrigued her the most. Luna and Cadance had mentioned going to look for sexy attire. All of the secret things hidden in the basement of Rarity’s boutique came to mind. The exotic dresses, the pieces of clothing that both hid a mare’s privates yet drew attention to them at the same time, and the other accessories that went with them. Fluttershy had been to that part of the shop once, and only once as the heart attack she got when Rarity discovered her was so much she actually fainted.
After that she could never bring herself to ask Rarity about them. Of course, she always wanted to know. This chance she had now, to spy on Luna and Cadance and find out more was more than she could handle. Of course, a small part of her brain told her she’d had sex before, at least a few times, so why did the idea of sexy nightwear get to her so much? Probably because it was taboo, secretive and something that timid little Fluttershy wasn’t supposed to know about… but then again timid little Fluttershy was also supposed to be the virgin pegasus of the group, ironically enough, that title belonged to another in the group.
Listening in she waited until the hooves passed by her closet before she snuck out only to see a maid walking down the hall. The maid stopped by a corner and spoke almost as if to herself. “One hundred and eighteen.” The mare then continued onward.
That was weird, what were they counting and why? She pushed it out of her mind for now. Instead, she hurried along to follow in Luna’s hoofsteps. She managed to catch them just around a corner going into a room with a set of double doors. A pink floor was about all Fluttershy got to see before the door closed behind them. She hurried up to the door and listened in.
Luna exclaimed, “Oh my, is that truly what mares these days are expected to wear?”
Cadance replied. “Not exactly, this is just an example. It’s part of a set though.”
Fluttershy’s face was burning just hearing those words. She wanted to know more, needed to know more. Looking around she tried to find a way to sneak in. Lucky for her there was a nearby vent and this wouldn’t be Fluttershy’s first time hiding in one. With careful ease she pulled out a pocket tool she kept hidden in her mane at all times. A mare never knew when they might need to run, hide in a vent, and then never be found again when their equine biology class started talking about how babies were made.
She unscrewed the vent, slunk in smoothly, and sealed it up behind her. Every move she made was silent as she climbed through the vent and found her way to one that showed the inside of the room. Inside she saw Cadance and Luna both. The room was pink on the floor, red on the walls, and a deeper shade altogether on the ceiling. Various poniquines stood with dresses on them… no, not dresses. There was hardly enough clothing for that. Some of them even had… saddles. Oh my, that was, a bit more than even she bargained for.
The one Luna was looking at was a lacy thing made of black silk. The lines and placement of the clothing all were meant to draw attention to the rump and what would be there on a real pony. Fluttershy imagined what Luna would look like wearing it and her heart skipped a beat. Wasn’t it already bad enough she was being forced to marry her, and kept having weirdly pleasant dreams, why did she have to imagine the princess like that as well?
Cadance went the extra step and actually helped Luna into said clothing. Fluttershy didn’t have to imagine it anymore…
Luna squeed and jumped in place after looking in a mirror. “I look un-resistible!”
“You mean irresistible, and yes, yes you do. Even I might go for you.” Cadance joked.
Luna gave her a wink. “Well, me and my sister may have to discuss things if we did. After all if blood relation is no longer a concern…”
Cadance’s face paled. “W-what?”
Luna laughed. “I am jesting. No, I think this will suit my beautiful wives perfectly. I shall bring this back to my room so that I may admire it later on.”
Cadance cleared her throat likely in an attempt to clear her mind of whatever thoughts Luna put into them. “Of course. Just remember not to abuse the power of that. Don’t want the entire staff to get turned on from the sight of you.”
Luna rolled her eyes. “Considering how many of the staff already do, I doubt that’s the problem. In fact, a great number of them imagine me and my sister together. If only they knew how close that came to the truth.”
Cadance took a step back. “Can we stop talking about this, please.”
Luna laughed again. “Oh, Cadance. You are shy about something after all.”
“Listen, I draw the line at Incest. There is a reason Twilight Sparkle’s room is on the opposite side of the castle from mine and Shining’s in the Crystal Kingdom.”
Luna purred. “She values my sister more than her brother I would think.”
“Sure, but after the love potion attempt when she was a filly, I don’t trust her not to lose her mind and do something regrettable eventually.”
Luna stared at her. “I’m sorry, Twilight did what?”
Cadance laughed. “Nothing, she did nothing. Let’s pretend I said nothing as well, okay?”
Using a bit of her magic Luna slid the dress off much to Fluttershy’s regret. She would have loved to continue watching her like that. Of course, now that she’d seen more of these dresses she wondered, which one would she wear? If she was going that way. Not that she was planning to. Nor did she plan to sneak in after these two left to steal the white lacy one with the pink hearts on it, oh and the matching saddle that accompanied it.
She also didn’t wait in the vents until those two actually did leave, locking the door behind them. Only to sneak out of the vent, trot into the room, grab the white one with the pink hearts, and sneak back out through the vent never to be caught. No, Fluttershy certainly didn’t do exactly that.
***
The dinner had gone all too well Luna had thought. As everypony departed for the evening she noticed Twilight and Celestia heading off together. As much as she wanted, she knew that Twilight’s firsts, all of them, would have to belong to Celestia. They had a long-standing relationship that could not be interrupted. Luna would have to accept her sloppy seconds if anything. Celestia was quite possessive of her former student. It was a shame though, Celestia was so polite and almost distant to the others.
It almost made Luna think that Celestia didn’t want to rut these mares into oblivion. Of course, even if that was the case, it certainly only counted for Celestia not at all for Luna. She was well prepared for this. Any tool, toy, or accessory that would be required she had acquired and kept safe. Of course, she didn’t expect to need them right away, but eventually one of her wives was going to ask for something a little more than hooves, wings, and tongue. Who would Luna be if she didn’t have those requests prepared well in advance?
Not a pony deserving the title; Princess of the Night.
The main group of ponies had gone back to their respective rooms, led by Shining Armor and his most trusted guards. For Luna she returned to her private quarters. It was time for her to try and catch at least a little bit of shut-eye before going into her role properly. Once in her room, she threw back the thick black curtains allowing the brighter than desired light of sunset to fill it. Her horn lit up and she could feel her sister’s magic joining hers in the night sky. They touched, wrapped around each other and melted into a single powerful force as the sun lowered and the moon rose.
Feeling successful she went back to her room, leaving the curtain open to allow the moonlight to fill the small space. She still needed a nap at the very least. Something she didn’t notice at first was the lump under the black blanket on her bed. It was roughly pony-sized but circular like a ball. Did Pinkie sneak in here? That lovely pink-
Throwing back the covers revealed Fluttershy. Her body wasn’t naked, instead, she was wearing a pink saddle. White stalking went all the way up her legs and connected to a set of lacy fabric which seemed to run around every curve of her body focusing on her cutie mark and her rear. Pink hearts were dotted over several places on her body, one particular heart on her chest that stood out among the chest fluff.
Luna stared in silence for several long minutes. Her breathing shallow, her body twitching, parts of her body growing far warmer than they had any right to. Every single fiber of her being wanted to take Fluttershy. To show the mare that her surprise was not in vain, that she could have every ounce of the Princess of the Night’s attention, love, and affection. Only one horrible thing stopped her.
Fluttershy was asleep.
Luna eventually gave up, and decided that she would instead take the time to do the second-best thing with this mare. She crawled into bed, wrapped her wing around her and threw the covers back over them. She went to sleep and joined Fluttershy in the world of her dreams. Those dreams were, to say the least, very delightful.
***
Twilight was still not all the way there. She felt off somehow. Like something just wasn’t clicking in her brain. Like a complicated machine filled with cogs and gears, oil, and working parts, only one of those gears was gone and she just couldn’t quite put the pieces together.
Today had been far too radical for her. So many changes, her routine so thoroughly destroyed. Every part of her life had so suddenly shifted that she actually fell to dark magic for about five seconds. Enough to warrant her entire body aching, and then she lost her mind for a few hours there. It was only thanks to love and care of Celestia that she was able to come back but she still wasn’t all the way here.
It was probably more of the fact that she forgot how to use a spoon twice when eating that Celestia was keeping such a close eye on her. Thankfully nopony else had noticed. She was embarrassed to say the least that she let her mind go so badly. All she wanted to do was sleep, sleep and feel normal again.
Celestia led her with a wing to her private quarters where she helped Twilight into the bed. It had been a long time since she last lay on the bed, a longer time still since she watched Celestia lowering her sun from this perspective. Once the sun was gone and the balcony doors were closed, purple curtains drawn shut, Celestia turned to see Twilight staring at her.
Twilight quickly looked at her own hooves. “I’m sorry. I um… I shouldn’t be staring.”
Celestia walked over to the bed and climbed up. “No, no, it’s quite alright. You’re… you’re interested in me. It’s honestly quite flattering Twilight.”
Twilight moved herself to try and get out of Celestia’s way only to find a golden aura surrounding her and lifting her up like a doll. Twilight was oriented to face Celestia and then laid down next to her. The blanket came falling over them heavy and warm. One of Celestia’s wings landed on Twilight’s side sending shivers of warmth through her entire body. One of the feathers in particular landed on her cutie mark drawing a silent breath from Twilight’s body.
Celestia had her eyes closed, her head lying on the pillow. “You may come closer if you need. I know it can be cold in the castle late at night.”
Twilight scooted closer and felt her body press against Celestia’s. She was so close to her. Every part of Twilight’s body was shaking with anticipation. She wasn’t even sure what she was anticipating. This was so close to one of her dreams. To lay next to Celestia, only to have Celestia start moving that wing over parts of her body nopony else was allowed to touch. She waited, but Celestia never made the move. Perhaps that was still a dream after all.
Those white, puffy lips laid there inviting and unprotected. Twilight leaned closer. If only she could get close enough, maybe she could feel those lips against her own. She’d never had an interest in these kinds of things before, but after seeing Rarity and Applejack, after all those dreams, and perhaps closer to being in heat than she realized, she just couldn’t force the feeling away with study this time. A book wasn’t going to make this go away. Only a good kiss and maybe an active hoof might. Only one of those was Twilight willing to do in Celestia’s bed.
Twilight closed her eyes and moved forward. Her lips met something… furry. Twilight opened her eyes first to see white fur covering her vision. Then she pulled back to see Celestia staring at her. That was no Celestia’s lips, that was Celestia’s neck… kissing a giant alicorn was harder than she thought. Now that Celestia was staring at her whatever bravado Twilight had early vanished.
With a nervous smile she rolled over facing her back to Celestia. “Um… good night, um… my love.”
Celestia giggled. Not the response she figured. Still, Celestia drew her in closer and wrapped a hoof around her pulling her into a tight embrace as she became the big spoon for Twilight. “Good night, my Twilight.”
***
Celestia laid there holding Twilight close until the mare blissfully fell asleep. There was no way she could miss what Twilight had tried to do. The kiss was missed only by Celestia looking up at the exact moment Twilight leaned forward. If the kiss had connected… the heat running through Celestia’s body at the moment was telling her that the situation would have ended with Twilight being taken like a newlywed mare on her wedding ni- oh… that was only three days away…
Celestia had to find a way out of this. She was getting far too close to taking Twilight and just ending this game. There were some kind of rules somewhere that said that teachers and mother figures could not bed their student and step-daughters. Right? Somewhere that was written, a law perhaps? Oh who was she kidding, that wasn’t a law. Even fully related ponies could… do things she did not want to think about, Luna forbid memories she tried to keep locked away come back to her.
The game was getting close to an end, but there had to be a way out. A way she could avoid Marrying Twilight, at least as of yet and also avoid getting everypony else married at the same time… she’d sleep and think about it. With luck an answer would come in the morning.
That night she dreamt, and those dreams were filled with the kinds of thoughts she should not be having about a lavender alicorn and her five very attractive and interested friends. Also the male version of Luna was there… it was the kind of sinful dream she really hoped Luna wasn’t watching.
Chapter Sixteen: When Fluttered Wings Lead to Stained Sheets
Chapter Sixteen: When Fluttered Wings Lead to Stained Sheets
Written by TheCrimsonDM
It was late, the moon shone through the balcony door with blades of its pale light falling upon the sleeping face of the most adorable pegasus in the land. At least that was how Luna felt as she stared down at the mare, holding her in a tight embrace and feeling the soft rise and fall of her body as she breathed. Fluttershy’s entire body smelled of honey and dandelions. It made Luna crazy with anticipation to find out what the mare tasted like, of course, she was too precious in her slumber to ever disturb.
One eye cracked open and stared up at Luna. A nervous smile spread over her lips. “Um… h-hi.”
Luna smiled down at her. “So to what do I owe the pleasure of your presence dearest, Fluttershy.”
Fluttershy smiled at her. “I um… w-wanted t-to know w-what you thought of um… this…” her eyes flickered down to where her body would be underneath the dark blue feathers of Luna’s wing.
Luna leaned down, her face hovering only inches away from Fluttershy’s. “You’re beautiful, more attractive than I dared hope. More stunning than even I feel worthy.”
Fluttershy smiled and her face turned a deep red. “R-really?”
Luna moved closer only centimeters away from Fluttershy’s lips. She could feel the tiny mare’s breath hot, and humid against her own. “I wanted nothing more than to be intimate with you the moment I saw, but you looked so peaceful in your sleep, I could not make myself wake you.”
Fluttershy swallowed. “Um… c-can I ask a q-question?”
“Anything, my love.” Luna was going to let her make the first move. After that, the game would be won and Luna would have her prize.
“Why did you tell Twilight that I dream of coupling with animals?”
Luna leaned back. “I… excuse me?”
Fluttershy blinked a few times. “T-Twilight said you t-told her that.”
Luna sat up. “I did no such thing.”
Luna’s eyes widened. There had been many conversations about dreams with Twilight, as the young mare had such an interest in how they worked. So many conversations and so many dreams yet not once did she ever recall telling Twilight that Fluttershy dreamed of breeding with animals. Needless to say, any sort of mood Luna may have been in was now ruined.
Fluttershy spoke again. “She was um… quite detailed with her description.”
Luna’s eye twitched. This planned night of fun going further south than that time she tried to invite Celestia to an orgy with whipped cream and bananas. She expected explosions to be happening soon and pony rears to catch on fire.
And no strange earth pony with an hourglass cutie mark and tie to save her this time.
***
A half-hour later Luna was out at night and all through the town ponies slept with hardly a sound. Or so Luna thought until she flew by a window that was cracked only to see three mares inside up to an activity that Luna herself was waiting eagerly to try on her wedding night. It was technically Wednesday now as it was well past midnight. Only two more days she told herself, and then true happiness and a happily ever after was hers. So long as Celestia’s fear of love didn’t allow for her to succeed at her plans to dismantle the marriage first.
Then again, never let it be said that Luna lost a game. Even when she did, she was a sore loser. Luna smiled knowing that in one way or the other she was going to win this game of theirs.
Ponyville was a quiet place, a happy place. If Luna hadn’t come back as an alicorn and was a mere pegasus she would have preferred to live here instead of the castle. In another timeline, in an alternate world this might have been possible. For now, she flew her way through the town enjoying the quiet peace that always came over her on nights such as these.
Her duties as Princess of the Night were numerous and varied. Helping ponies through their nightmares and helping them to process whatever deep trauma they were having was only one such thing. The more shifty side of politics she also handled, bribes, blackmail, helping ponies to go to a sleep they would never awaken from. All the jobs that Celestia was not very good at.
There were also the threats of monsters she had to contend with. The Everfree Forest which stretched on for miles, even going to the base of the mountain Canterlot sat upon was filled with such threats to pony safety. She had a special team dedicated to hunting these creatures down, and connections to a few that lived quiet lives in Ponyville.
Flying away from the town she made her way over the endless rows of apple trees. Off in the distance she could see the other farms all associated with the Sweet Apple Acres trademark. From carrots to potatoes. After looking at the genealogy of Applejack’s family, it turned out it was massive. It actually included several members of pies, cakes, and pears which shocked her. The pears and the apples had a long-standing feud after all… though she wouldn’t bring that subject up with Applejack anytime soon, she was already on unsteady ground with the mare.
The small red house that Applejack called home stood in the distance. She swooped down and made her way to a window. Her magic told her that her target was indeed here. Though she was uncertain of which room belonged to him. She knocked at the glass of a small room filled with children’s toys.
The window slid open and Applebloom stuck her head out rubbing at her eyes. “Luna, what are you doing here?”
“I am looking for Spike.”
She yawned. “He’s in the next room over, he’s a boy so he has to stay with Big Mac.”
Luna smiled. “Thy assistance is appreciated, Applebloom.”
Applebloom yawned again. “Luna… why are you taking my sister away from us?”
Luna’s heart climbed into her throat. “I… I am not.”
“Yes you are, you took her to Canterlot to get married and stuff. When she’s a princess she’s going to live up there…”
Luna swallowed. “I have a feeling she will have two homes after the marriage. There is no way I would ever take her away from the family that means so much to her. In fact, after the marriage I fully intend to come down and help out on the farm from time to time.”
“Really?”
Luna nodded. “Of course, how else to show how much I appreciate your beautiful sister than to help out with the things and ponies she cares most about in the world.”
Applebloom smiled. “Okay. Good night. Do I have to call you Auntie now?”
“Only if you wish to.”
Applebloom closed her window and went back to bed. Luna tried not to think of how cute it was that the small one called her auntie. Nor how excited she was to be part of this family after the wedding. She tried and failed. Maybe she would get a cowpony hat as well, oh and a bandana to go around her neck. She could chew a piece of hay just like Big Mac always did.
Speaking of which. She went to the next room over and knocked on the window a few times.
The window slid open and Spike’s head poked out. “Sup?”
Luna smiled. “So casual I see.”
“You’re marrying my mom, that means you’re going to be my step-mom soon, so… yeah let’s go with casual.”
Luna had to suppress a squee. Twilight came packaged with a child! Oh joy, she always wanted to be a mother. Surely Celestia would be just as excited to find out they could both be mothers. She levitated Spike up and out the window before closing it with another spell. Once Spike was safely on her back she began flying away.
Spike asked, “So what took you so long?”
Luna let out a sigh. “My apologies. I was so caught up with enjoying my brides’ company that I had nary a moment to come retrieve you. We saved you some dinner and cake in the fridge if you are hungry.”
Spike yawned. “Nah, I’m good. Just need to get a few things at the library first though. For Twilight.”
Luna made the corrections to her flight path as she headed now for the library. “I do hope the wait wasn’t too long.”
“No, it was fun. Apple family’s a bit confused but not against the whole idea. As for me, I just want to go to bed, check on Twilight and make sure she’s okay.”
Luna laughed. “She is doing just fine. She is no longer playing pirate though which is sad, I enjoyed that. As for checking on her, I fear her and Celestia are enjoying each other’s company tonight so you will need to wait until morning.”
Spike giggled. “Man, already? I thought she’d at least wait until the wedding to lose that virginity she values so highly.”
Luna laughed as well. “Seems my sister must have convinced her otherwise. What are we retrieving from Twilight’s that is of such importance?”
Spike grinned. “Oh just an educational book Twilight left behind when she became a pirate.”
“Aha, of course, she would. My little bookworm cares for her education more than she may for any of her friends or lovers.”
Spike joined in on the laughter too. “Well at least some things stay the same.”
***
It was late into the night before Luna had returned home to her quarters. She had dropped Spike off in Twilight’s old room where he quickly went to sleep and hid the educational material, safely inside a paper bag, somewhere inside the home. Luna cared not for what was in the book, she actually had bigger concerns on her mind. After the initial encounter with Fluttershy that night she feared that should Fluttershy spy her again the awkward tension would grow.
No, she should let things be for some time. Hopefully by the time the marriage actually happened she would be okay. It was late, and she was still tired. Not enough sleep the past two days. Her excitement could only carry her forward for so long. Tomorrow was going to be a busy day.
So for now she went to the kitchen to retrieve the two pieces of cake from the fridge she had saved for her and Spike. If he was not going to eat it, then she could only enjoy it to herself. Vanilla cake with a strawberry surprise in the middle, Celestia did know her cakes and know them well.
Returning to her room she paused for a moment. Last she left she had apologized to Fluttershy and left in such a hurry the poor mare may have gotten scared. It was just that Luna couldn’t stand to hear such a… slander against her. It was true that Fluttershy did have strange dreams of animals but not of breeding with them. Of breeding them sure, but that was entirely different.
Now she would go back to bed, once more alone and this time without the warmth of another body next to hers. With a sigh, she entered the room and shut the door behind her. On the bed sat Fluttershy. She looked at Luna with one eye, the other half of her face was covered by that long mane of hers.
Luna choked. “Fluttershy, why are you still here?”
Fluttershy winced. “O-oh… I… I’m sorry I’ll leave right away.”
Good job Luna, break her heart by mistake why don’t you? “No, please, that is not what I meant. I meant, why stay after such an awkward conversation, did I not scare you away?”
Fluttershy bit her lower lip. “N-no… um… I… I came here for another reason t-too.”
The cake floated over to the nightstand and was set down. Luna made her way to the bed and looked Fluttershy in the eye. “What can I aid you with my dear?”
Fluttershy was looking anywhere she could that was not directly at Luna. “I-I-I want t-t-to stay here with you t-tonight.”
Luna’s heart skipped a beat. “Truly?”
Fluttershy nodded.
Luna leaned in once more. Admiring that wonderful scent, and the alluring lingerie. Just as Luna leaned in Fluttershy shot her head forward, their lips met and hot fire raced down Luna’s face. Fluttershy pulled back a moment later. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry.”
Luna licked her lips. There was a hint of honey there. “Oh, Fluttershy. I am your fiancé, do not feel sorry. If you wish to spend the night with me I am more than pleased.” She looked Fluttershy up and down admiring the mare’s slender tall frame. “If you wish to continue kissing, or perhaps more, I would be even more than pleased.”
Luna reached out with a hoof and gently stroked Fluttershy’s chest. It was like pushing the button on a toy with opposable wings. Fluttershy’s wings came popping out, rigid, hard, and beautiful. “Oh… it seems somepony is excited.”
Fluttershy swallowed. “N-nopony… has um… d-done that in awhile… s-sorry.”
Luna leaned in, wrapped a wing around the back of Fluttershy’s head running through her soft pink mane. Their lips met once more only this time they stayed. Fluttershy’s hooves found their way on Luna’s chest, but they didn’t push, they stroked the tuft of fur there. Lips parted slightly for Luna and invited her tongue to come inside for a visit. The honey flavor of Fluttershy’s mouth and tongue were sweet, hot, and sticky. How could she resist?
They fell upon the bed with Luna on top of Fluttershy. Once she pulled away they were both struggling to gasp for air. Luna swallowed. “It um… it’s been awhile for me too.”
Fluttershy had a dazed look on her face. “S-so that’s what an alicorn k-kisses like.”
Luna smiled. “Of course my dear, now let me show you what other things an alicorn can do with their tongue.”
A hoof gently pressed against Luna’s chest and Fluttershy stared into her eyes. It was such a deep, meaningful look, one that even Luna couldn’t resist. Fluttershy’s lips trembled as she asked, “C-could you put on that um… thing Cadance got for you?”
Luna’s heart skipped another few beats. “How did you… nevermind that. Of course I can. Give me just one moment my love.”
The rest of the night was wonderful, intimate, and sticky, but it was far from restful.
***
Celestia woke early in the morning. Earlier than anypony else. Today she had special instructions to deliver the newspaper and a Celestia-sized cup of coffee to her bedroom instead of the dining room. She was not ready to meet anypony else. Twilight was still asleep on the bed, sleeping peacefully after a wonderful, peaceful night.
Still in her red bathrobe, Celestia used the light of the morning’s dawn to read by as she drank her cup of coffee. What she saw there wasn’t exactly surprising but it was exactly what she expected. Somehow she knew, just knew Luna was involved with this.
The caption read, “Scandal in the throne. Princess Celestia, Princess Luna, and Princess Twilight all engaged to be married to the five elements of harmony before the week’s end!”
Another mention in the newspaper mentioned the one time a gala turned into a massive orgy and how they should have seen this coming from the Princess of the Sun as she was always too warm. There were other mentions of Luna being the Princess of Passion. What was worse was the rumor of the onetime Luna may have, possibly, forced an entire village into an orgy as a tentacle monster… with no mention of the bananas or the whipped cream though.
Celestia let out a sigh. “Another loss to my dear sister… that changes today. For this war of ours is on. It, is, on.”
Chapter Seventeen: When Morning Coffee Meets the Sun
Chapter Seventeen: When Morning Coffee Meets the Sun
Written by TheCrimsonDM
It was early morning and the servants had kindly led Rarity to the royal dining room. Inside Rarity was surprised to see she was not the first one to arrive. Both Applejack and Rainbow Dash were here already. Pinkie Pie was still asleep when she last checked, but there was a noticeable lack of any princesses in the room.
Rarity took a seat and found both of the other two mares in here were already eating. Figuring she wouldn’t be causing any additional harm eating before anypony else arrived she made sure to grab herself a nice stack of pancakes. Sure it was going to harm her diet a little, but with her getting married in a little more than two days she was going to be fine indulging in some sweets.
Rainbow Dash was already through her cup of coffee and half of her pancakes meaning that Rarity was able to sleep in well today. Maybe a little too well. “So, how are you two feeling about this current situation now?”
Applejack let out a sigh. “Luna’s sure is sweet, not sure about anything else but she clearly loves us.”
Rarity hummed happily. “Of course she does. Why do you think I felt her the perfect mare to marry us.”
Applejack chuckled. “Ah thought you just wanted to be a princess.”
“Oh hush you.”
Applejack leaned forward. “Why don’t you make me?”
Rarity matched her enthusiasm. “Oh, don’t tempt me. I know of better uses for that mouth of yours you know.”
Rainbow Dash stood up suddenly drawing their attention and reminding Rarity that the pegasus was still in fact in the room with them. “I GOT IT!”
Applejack looked at her. “Uh… got what?”
Rainbow Dash smiled and looked as though she had solved some impossible puzzle she was so pleased with herself. “I’m going to be the first one to buck Luna.”
Rarity spat her coffee out. “Excuse me!”
“You’re excused.”
Rarity stared, open mouthed. “But, but, but… why?”
Rainbow Dash grinned. “Because clearly Twilight’s going to be the first one to buck Celestia. So I’m going after Luna. I’m going to beat you all there.”
Applejack was busy using a few napkins to clean the dispensed coffee off of her face. “Ah take it you really are the fastest pegasus in Equestria.”
Rainbow Dash grinned. “Hey, it’s got to be somepony right? Besides, I gave it a full day to think it over and I think I like her.”
Rarity rolled her eyes. “So it only takes twenty four hours to get into your bed. I’ll keep that in mind.”
Rainbow Dash laughed. “Like I’d you let you in there. Applejack, maybe, you nah.”
“And what exactly is wrong with me?” Rarity glared daggers at her.
Rainbow Dash grinned. “You really want to know?”
Rarity stood on her hind legs, her forelegs balancing on the table. “Yes, yes I do.”
Rainbow Dash opened her mouth to speak as the door swung open. Applejack nearly whispered. “Thank Celestia for the distraction.”
In came Luna and Fluttershy. Fluttershy’s cheeks were pink and something about her was different. The way she moved with every sway of her hips, the sensual power in each step, and how her tail was lifted up all made them stare. In fact Fluttershy’s tail seemed to be entwined with Luna’s, the two tails braided around each other. Luna draped a wing over Fluttershy and led the mare to her side of the table where they sat down together. Fluttershy nuzzled in closely to Luna’s side before looking with tired eyes at the coffee.
Rainbow Dash sat down, her mouth working silently. Even Rarity was unsure of exactly what had happened but the change in Fluttershy’s appearance had meant something surely occurred. Something that even she was not fully comfortable with. With a voice that came out far too timid for her own liking Rarity asked. “Are you two alright?”
Fluttershy hummed. “Mhmm.” She nuzzled closer and one of her wings slipped underneath Luna’s to bring a feathered tip down Luna’s back.
Luna cooed at the sensation before answering. “We had the most splendid of nights. It may even have been better then my first Nightmare Night.”
Rarity swallowed. “Um… did you get any good sleep?”
Luna smiled. “We slept… some. Yet, our activities kept us quite awake during most of the night.”
Applejack croaked out a question now. “We… as in the royal we?”
Luna shook her head. “No, we as in me and Fluttershy.” She looked down a bit and frowned. “I hope thou are not too upset with me. If you wish, any or all of you may share this night with me like me and Fluttershy shared the last.”
Rarity took another sip of her coffee, then a drink, then she chugged the entire thing in one gulp. She set it down and looked at Rainbow Dash. “Looks like you were too slow for once.”
Rainbow Dash groaned. “I LOST! To Fluttershy! Of all the ponies, I lost to Fluttershy… oh by Celestia’s sweet butt, how did that happen?”
Another much more mature and warm voice entered the conversation. “Is my butt truly that sweet?”
Looking over revealed that Twilight and Celestia had appeared alongside Pinkie Pie. The door wasn’t opened so Rarity figured they must have teleported in. Well at least there was plenty of breakfast for the three of them. There were also many questions about the two sets of ponies there, but Rarity was a lady, and a lady knew subtly. She knew exactly how to be subtle, and ask things in just the right ways as to get the best answers.
Applejack asked. “So, Shy, how was sleeping with Luna? Was the sex as good as they say?”
Rarity didn’t bother to not try face hoofing. In fact she attempted to punch her hoof through her own skull as a reminder that the mare she chose to love was about as dense as the walls of Tartarus. Well that only resulted in a small headache…
Twilight chimed in. “You slept with a princess too? I bet it was wonderful. Celestia’s the warmest, snuggliest pony in Equestria. I’m… still not sharing her with any of you.”
Pinkie Pie sighed. “Twilight, you’re so cruel.”
Twilight glared at her. “I have had, as Rainbow Dash would put it, dibs on Celestia for far longer than you.”
Rainbow Dash had sunken in her chair. Outdone by two of her friends she must have felt like a sore loser. Well that’s what stuck up rainbow ponies who couldn’t see how attractive Rarity was received; disappointment.
Celestia gave a knowing smile to Luna and Luna frowned. Somehow Rarity felt there was a message being passed between the two that she didn’t catch. Of course it would be easy for two sisters to do so, even Rarity and Sweetie Belle had their own secret code for certain things.
A newspaper was levitated from Celestia and brought over to Luna who grabbed it in her aura as she took a bite of a pancake. There were also dinner items on the table, mashed potatoes again, cake, and some strange concoction she wasn’t sure of, a stew of some kind. Luna seemed content to eat pancakes… again.
Celestia took a seat on her side of the table as she was joined by both Pinkie and Twilight. Luna read on her eyes starting to widen with each word. Eventually she looked away and said, “Scandalous? How could this be scandalous, are these ponies running the newspaper so daft they think they can dare to judge their leaders?”
Celestia smiled as she sipped at her coffee, her smile turned to a frown and she set it down. Without even realizing it Twilight seemed to be putting a few extra sugarcubes and cream into it. Celestia was too busy replying to even notice. “Why, my dear sister, they have every right to critique us on our behavior since we are the example. Of course this is also the entertainment news so they put a bad face on everything. Remember how we opened up an orphanage for lost kittens a few weeks back?”
Luna nodded. “Of course, it was filled to the brim with purrs and cuddles, and scratches.”
Celestia took another sip of her coffee and smiled this time seemingly unaware that Twilight had sweetened it for her. “Hmm, maybe it just didn’t have time to settle… oh the orphanage. Yes, that same newspaper said we were actively making the cat population issue worse.”
“But that is why we opened the place! So the cat population could find homes instead of alleyways.”
Celestia smiled. “Of course, but these ponies judge everything we do. So when we act without a great deal of thought sometimes things will come back to haunt us.”
Luna scowled and turned the page. “The article continues dear sister… wait… did…” She set it down and stared right at Celestia. “Did you really groom Twilight from foalhood to be your wife one day?”
Celestia swallowed her coffee and it was set down on the table with just a little too much force making it splash out. “Excuse me?”
“It says here that when your marriage plans to her having been in place for years, that you must have been grooming her from the age of eight years old to eventually be your wife. Everything from sexual education to how she styles her mane are apparently all designed to please you so that when the day came and you turned her into an alicorn you could use her as your perfect sexual pleasure thing.”
The cup of coffee was boiling over. Twilight yelped and had to scoot away. Pinkie Pie did much the same. Celestia took several paces back and revealed that her seat was now singed and small embers came off it from where her body touched. “Excuse me dear sister, I feel I must congratulate the author of that article for their bravery.”
A golden light consumed Celestia and then she was gone. Several minutes passed by and Rarity could almost swear she heard a stallion screaming somewhere far, far away. When the golden light returned Celestia’s body was actually steaming and the temperature in the room had grown by several degrees. She kept her distance from the table as she spoke. “I am done.”
Luna raised an eyebrow. “What… what did you do?”
“I was so moved by his courage that I offered him a vacation. And he accepted it gracefully.”
Luna nodded. “And where was this vacation too?”
Celestia smiled. “Well at first I thought of the moon, but as you have explained numerous times, your moon is not a place for me to send things that displease me. So instead I found a better one. One where he could always be warm and reminded of just how courageous and brave he truly was.”
“Where?”
“The sun.”
Everypony stared at her for a long moment. Celestia put a hoof to her chest, breathed in deeply and exhaled. The steam on her back cooled and she once more walked to the table. Pinkie reached out with a hoof and Celestia stopped her with a word. “No.”
Pinkie retracted her hoof and looked sad.
Celestia explained. “I’m sorry, I fear my temperature is still a bit high right now. I do not want to hurt you… oh my, is that a burn?”
Pinkie Pie laughed. “No, I’m fine.”
Twilight looked down and away from Celestia.
Celestia lowered her head. “I’m terribly sorry… it’s been a long time since I’ve had to maintain my temperature around ponies I care for. Please forgive me. I’ll have Cadance heal those burns as soon as she awakes.”
Pinkie Pie laughed again but it sounded a little off. Not full of the general cheer and life it usually had. “I’m fine. Really.”
Celestia took a sip of her coffee and sighed. “Are you sure you want to marry me?”
Pinkie Pie nodded. “Of course, I love you! I just have to get used to… that.”
Twilight shot a glare at Pinkie which went unnoticed by the pink mare.
Celestia noticed and set her coffee down. She looked at Luna who was back to staring at Fluttershy. Neither of them seemed to have any care for whatever it was Celestia just did with the reporter that wrote the article or for Celestia’s rather high body heat. Rarity began to think maybe there were complications here she wasn’t aware of. The sooner they got married and turned into alicorn princesses the better. At least then they might not be accidently burned by Celestia getting angry, or as rumors suggested, having an orgasm… That last one was going to take some experimentation and probably a bucket of ice water.
Spike woke up earlier than he’d expected after a late night adventure with Luna. He wasn’t expecting her to come for him in the middle of the night. Nor for her to spend ten minutes digging around Twilight’s room searching for secrets. Once she had finished that and he had the book he was going to give to her today they returned to the castle and Spike went straight to bed in Twilight’s old room.
Once the morning had come and he woke up he dragged himself out of bed and made sure to leave Twilight’s educational material on her bed for her. The old room was clean and spotless, as was expected of the maids in the castle. It was also left in perfect order. Not a quill, inkpot, or book out of place.
He left the room only to see a servant with a maid outfit walking toward the door. She had a black mane cut off at her chin and lavender fur almost matching Twilight’s in hue. The mare stared down at Spike in confusion for a moment but then smiled and bowed.
Spike rolled his eyes. “You're Twilight’s right?”
She nodded.
Spike smiled and rubbed his claws together. Right, because Twilight was a princess, and not only that one who was getting married to Celestia on Friday… “Tell me, do they have any spare gems I can eat for breakfast?”
The mare blinked, silently turned around and motioned for him to follow. Spike figured she either didn’t speak out of fear, respect or was actually mute. Whatever the cause she was at least leading him to his breakfast so he’d be okay with that. The thought only briefly occurred to him that he shouldn’t abuse this power too much… and that the others likely had no restraint whatsoever.
Along the way he encountered Shining Armor as he walked down the hall. Upon seeing him Shining Armor changed direction and began walking alongside Spike. “Good morning, Spike, oh great hero of the Crystal Empire.”
Spike laughed. “Of course I am. Who else would I be?”
“Nice, I see your tact is still in place.”
“It is, where?”
Shining Armor laughed. “So, you have fun playing Ogres and Obellets with Big Mac down there?”
“Yeah, but it’s kind of a shame there is only two of us. Makes the whole point of roleplaying kind of useless. Sometimes Pinkie or Rainbow Dash joins in. I also got Twilight to play… twice. Each time she accused me of putting my fantasies for Rarity into it and then proceeded to make characters who broke the pacing of my game.”
Shining Armor nodded. “Yeah… she’s always been like that. Accused me of doing the same thing with Cadance, and then broke my game… of course she was so happy to be included that I couldn’t say no.”
“Yeah well I had to put my claw down the second time. She almost made Big Mac cry when she killed the skeleton horse he was trying to befriend so she could get three experience points and level up… just for three experience points. I would have just given them to her.”
“At least she isn’t killing the guards for the most efficient way to level. That was a nightmare. Surprisingly where she really did well was with being the GM. She could create fun stories and balanced fights like none other. I remember one time she created a fight for me and my friends where we fought a dragon, we thought we’d lose until we noticed the magical harpoons she put in the battle for us to use. It was crazy how much thought she put into those battles.”
Spike scratched at the scales on his neck. “I’ll have to ask her about that.”
“So, what do you think about the wedding?”
Spike stretched his arms over his head as they turned down a corridor. “It’s insane. Glad to hear Twilight’s doing better but I’m pretty sure they’re all going to lose their minds soon.”
Shining Armor nodded. “It is crazy, but I think they’ll all be happy. At least, Cadance has me convinced they will. I still have plans drawn out for just in case this all goes wrong in the worst of ways.”
The servant opened the door and beckoned for the two to go in. They did and Spike found a small room filled with various gems in a bowl. A wall filled with blueprints, plans, and piles of folders on the desk. Shining Armor let out a sigh as he made his way to the desk.
Even Spike couldn’t forget this room if he tried. As he took a seat on the wooden chair across from Shining on the desk and grabbed the bowl of gems. He wondered why he was led to Shining Armor’s old office. He smiled as he opened up a report and Spike popped a sapphire into his mouth letting it melt into goo around his tongue.
Shining Armor spoke, “So, about this wedding I am currently trying to run security for, I think I have most of the potential and realistic threats handled but can you think of any that I might have missed?”
Spike didn’t have to think about it. “Discord.”
“Already covered,” Shining Armor said. “I spoke with him personally and when he found out about the eight way marriage he began laughing… he laughed, and laughed, and laughed until his entire body turned into hundreds of mouths laughing and one by one vanished. So… I don’t think he’ll be a threat. He seems to think this whole situation is some kind of-“
“Chaos?”
“Yes.”
Well he wasn’t wrong to think that, just from what little Spike had seen so far, this whole thing was nuts. In fact his initial response was pretty much the same as Discords. This was a joke. Still it was fun watching this. The only thing he could think of besides that was a simple one. “Do the brides all know what kind of power they have over ponies now?”
Shining Armor stared at him. “No, I don’t think they’ve realized it and I am really hoping that they remain that way.”
Spike nodded. “That might be a mistake.”
***
“So,” Twilight said as she walked with Celestia through the halls toward the room Cadance was supposed to be staying in. “You promised you’d teach me some things yesterday.”
Celestia offered a smile but it didn’t quite touch her eyes. “Of course. I know yesterday was a bit busy and my answers at the time were not… exactly to your liking.”
Twilight could agree to that. “I don’t think the answer of ‘when two ponies love each other very much they have a special kind of hug’ works anymore.”
Celestia winced. “I… was afraid of that. So I am asking the actual expert in these activities to help out.”
After this morning Celestia had thankfully cooled down a lot and the supposed burns they received were not bad enough to warrant anything more than a light healing spell from Twilight. She dared to risk rubbing up against Celestia’s side to find the mare was warm, not blistering hot, just warm. “You know… I was hoping that you’d teach me, yourself.”
Celestia’s body rose in temperature by a small amount. Twilight backed away instinctively. Did she anger Celestia with her request? Was she doing this in the wrong way? Now Twilight wasn’t sure and even though she had committed to making sure Celestia could feel all the pleasure a wife deserves, it felt almost like Celestia was pulling away from her. Maybe she felt insecure with how many wives she was about to have, Twilight knew she had some strong feelings toward that fact. Not to mention Twilight was ready to do anything to stop Celestia from doing anything with the others. Of course she hadn’t figured out how she could stop that half of the marriage yet.
Pinkie was getting way too up and close into her territory. Seeing Luna and Fluttershy this morning was also problematic. Even Twilight could tell they must have had a better night than she did. Twilight bet Fluttershy even kissed Luna… her cheeks were running hot at the thought, but now she just had to find the way to get Celestia to kiss her…
Before anypony else got that opportunity.
Celestia opened a door and they walked into a room that was bleached with pink and red. It was almost an eye sore to be sure but the large red bed in the middle shaped like a heart was really the only indication she needed to know that Cadance was the owner of this room. It didn’t hurt that the alicorn herself was sitting on the bed with a mischievous look in her eyes.
As Celestia led Twilight inside she spoke. “Cadance, Twilight requires some education on how intercourse works and various techniques. I assume you’re up to the task of teaching her?”
Cadance pouted. “Oh but Auntie, she is your wife. You should be the one to teach her such things.”
Twilight nodded in agreement. Hopeful for… anything really.
Celestia turned around and the doors shut behind her. The lock clicked as Twilight realized Cadance had just locked the three of them into a room together. Celestia turned a glare back upon Cadance.
Cadance smiled. “Oh no, my door seems to have shut and locked itself forcing you to take responsibility for your bride’s needs. Oops.”
Celestia growled, and then smiled. Her horn lit up and Celestia vanished for a moment only to appear a moment later with her face slammed into the door itself. Celestia slid to the floor. “Ah, I see you used Luna’s teleportation blocking spell on this room.”
Cadance laughed. “No, no, this one is of my own design and has been here for many years. How do you think I’ve dealt with ponies who have refused to acknowledge their feelings in the past? Shooting love into them only goes so far you know.”
Celestia looked at Cadance and then the bed she was sitting on with a disgusted look upon her face. Cadance grinned. “Oh come now, that’s only for after they admit their feelings and then want to act on them.”
Celestia recomposed herself and took a seat next to Twilight. “Then I suppose we shall be here for some time.”
Twilight stared up at her. “How come? Oh do you have a lot to teach me?” Her ears folded back as Twilight realized the implication of that. “Oh… not um… not too much I hope…”
Celestia let out a sigh as she wrapped a wing around Twilight’s back. “Twilight, I love you. However, I fear I am not qualified to teach you in this way.”
Twilight’s mind worked into double time and came to an answer that she really didn’t like. One that stung at her heart and made her wince with pain. She had thought of every possibility but not, not this one. How could she go her whole life and not even once think of this possibility. It had been years since their engagement and Twilight didn’t once stop to think… why Celestia had said yes.
A sniffle was followed by her vision going blurry. “I… I see.”
Cadance was quick to jump in. “Celestia, your breaking her heart!”
Celestia looked down and stroked the wing on Twilight’s back. Despite its warmth it felt alien and uncomfortable now. Twilight pushed the wing away. Celestia’s voice came out quiet. “Twilight, what’s wrong?”
“I’m… I’m fine.” Twilight lied. She lied through her teeth as she thought about everything. The reason Celestia hadn’t pushed for the marriage sooner. The reason she ditched Twilight off at Ponyville to make ‘friends’ and the reason she was still trying so hard to get out of this whole wedding. Out of every possible thing that could have happened Twilight didn’t think this would be the one that hurt the most. Of course Celestia didn’t want to kiss her, or teach her about sex, or, or even marry her.
Twilight fell to the floor. She couldn’t hold it in. She let out a quiet sob. “You don’t find me attractive.”
Cadance gasped.
Celestia froze. The reaction was proof, all the proof she needed to know that Celestia didn’t love her. Not in the way she wanted. She was just marrying her out of a promise. How foolish Twilight was to ever think she could have Celestia’s heart and attention. Even though Luna loved her, what was the point? Without Celestia, was there even one? Her entire life was dedicated to this one pony, all the school, all the dangerous missions, even becoming a princess was all for Celestia’s sake. How much of that time was wasted when it could have been spent elsewhere? Even Pinkie Pie had offered at least three times in the past to be intimate with Twilight, and each time Twilight had refused based on her obsession with Celestia. A one way attraction that was never meant to be. No, marrying Celestia was torture for the giant mare, Celestia obviously had eyes for Pinkie too and that just…
Cadance growled. “Celestia, fix this, now!”
Celestia croaked. “I don’t know how.”
Cadance growled. “Yes you do, and I don’t care if I have to watch the whole thing. Just do it.”
Twilight felt a warm aura wrapping around her. Oh great, now she was going to be thrown away. Put into the garbage where she belonged. She might as well be in here, in fact she might throw herself in there. Her parents had thrown her away first chance they got into Celestia’s school, but now even Celestia was going to toss her away.
Something soft rubbed at her eyes and nose. She opened her eyes just a little to see Celestia’s wing trying to clean her face. Oh great, smear Twilight’s make around and make me look more ugly, that’s all she needed.
Celestia’s face leaned in. Now she’s going to whisper that she actually hated her into Twilight’s ear and that if she didn’t stop crying she’d destroy Twilight for bothering her. Twilight was positive that was exactly what was about to happen.
Celestia’s lips pressed against Twilight’s.
Twilight’s body froze as the lips met her own. Was this a mistake? An accident? No, it was still going on, Celestia wouldn’t stay like this if it was a mistake. Her eyes were cracked open, looking down into Twilight’s eyes. Unsure of what to do, Twilight tried to kiss back and found the Princess was letting it happen. Even though she had no idea what she was doing she kept trying to kiss. The hint of a smoky flavor on those lips was more than Twilight could dream of. As Celestia kissed her back she picked up more on what she was doing wrong and how to kiss better.
A hot feather drew a line down Twilight’s side, trailing all the way to Twilight’s cutie mark. It shot downward and wrapped around her rump, squeezing the soft vulnerable flesh and Twilight opened her mouth to gasp only to have massive, almost burning tongue shoot into her mouth. It was massive and Twilight almost felt herself choking at first, all she could taste was the smoky flavor of Celestia’s tongue. Twilight moved her tongue around it. The tongue moved in further and…
Twilight couldn’t breathe. The tongue was too big, it was like the one time she shoved a whole hamburger into her mouth. The wing that was caressing her butt moved with more ferocity. Twilight began choking on the tongue shoved in her mouth but it tasted so good she couldn’t do anything to stop it. Until it pressed against her uvula and Twilight gagged. Like a magical button on the back of her throat, Twilight knew that very instant, things were about to go sour.
Uh oh.
Celestia’s head shot backwards and Twilight fell to the floor coughing and sputtering. She drew in wheezy shallow breaths and Celestia covered her mouth with a wing, her face looking a little green. The magical flavor in her mouth was replaced by that of morning breakfast… oh no.
Twilight opened her mouth and proceeded to vomit all over Cadance’s floor. All the meanwhile Celestia was begging for forgiveness and claiming she merely lost control because of how attracted she was to Twilight. Even blaming Cadance for making her lose control like that. Of course Twilight didn’t care. Burning throat, taste of bile, nothing mattered so much to her as the fact that Celestia had really, really liked kissing her.
It was some minutes later that Celestia had left the room with Cadance and Twilight. In all her years, in all her time, she had only managed to do that to one other pony, who also happened to be a virgin before Celestia’s arrival. To say she was mortified would be an understatement. To say she was not still thinking of the grape flavored pony and the tiny rump being squeezed in her wing would be a lie… Celestia liked it.
Deep down she knew she shouldn’t have enjoyed it. Yet for all she wanted to think, she could not deny just how much she enjoyed the feeling of Twilight against her. Still making the poor thing vomit from an overeager makeout session was far too humiliating to think of. At least Cadance could take the time to explain to Twilight what just happened as Celestia went to brush her teeth. Which was the first thing she did, pancakes only tasted good the first time you ate them.
After brushing her teeth and still feeling far too embarrassed to show her face to Twilight again she made her way around the castle looking for something to distract her. There were a few options that an upset and disturbed princess could do. Playing chess was one of them. Lucky for her she had a friendly partner waiting for her about this time of day. Even today knowing that the marriage was underway she could still find him on one of the balconies.
Fancy Pants was found near the Canterlot gardens around this time of day looking for any would be opponents. Celestia of course being given the first and primary rights of challenge. Next to her would have been Luna but after their last game, which involved turning all of the staff into living chess pieces, Celestia had put a temporary ban on Luna’s chess games.
For now she found him at the chess set having just finished a match with a mare who scoffed at him as she left nose turned up in what had clearly been an easy win for him. Celestia joined him across the table and he smiled up at her.
“Princess Celestia, what a pleasure it is to see you here. And I fancied you may be busy with your lonely brides.”
Celestia smiled as she watched the table being reset for a match with her. “Of course I have many things to see to before the wedding but I value our games very much.”
Fancy Pants smiled. “You get the first turn.”
She moved a piece looking almost absent minded as she did. “So, tell me how things are going in the high society these days. It’s been some time since I’ve been around them.”
He laughed. “It’s been a week, Princess Celestia. I know high society can change a lot in a short time but it does not change that quickly without good reason too.”
Celestia watched him move a pawn. She matched his move with her own. “Do you suppose there might be such a reason in the near future?”
“Well there are some changes going on in the royal palace. When that happens the nobles tend to follow suit with changes of their own. Some are already speaking of the possibility of herds becoming popular again.”
Celestia kept her frown inside and maintained the friendly smile on her face. Outside of certain company she needed to maintain a certain appearance no matter how displeasing a sentence might be. At this point she feared even if she stopped the wedding now the nobles might still start marrying in mass and if that happened she knew inbreeding was only a step away. Those ponies, she swore, were the worst when it came to wanting to sleep with their own brother. Even Twilight, who by every right was a noble was… just as bad as the rest of them.
Several moves later she began to see a pattern to Fancy Pants motions. “So, what do you think of our wedding?”
“It is not my place to question anything you or Princess Luna do. For me, I am simply happy with the way life is now. I’m sure once things calm down in a few years time things will work themselves back to normalcy somehow.”
That was at least a little reassuring.
He added as he moved his queen into an odd position, one that made it vulnerable to her knight. “So you don’t think the other members of the upper-class will stay with herds.”
He laughed as his queen was taken down. “Of course not. These ponies can hardly stand even one pony in the same house for more than it takes to make some lifelong regrets. Having more than that is only going to cause problems.”
Celestia's smile grew. “Well that sounds reassuring somehow.”
Fancy Pants moved a rook into place and smiled. “Of course we never know the state of the future. Also, checkmate.”
Celestia stared at the board. There was no way out of this. She had just committed to actions that saw to her defeat and was stuck with the consequences of such. She shook her head. “Well at least it was a good game.”
“It always is, Princess Celestia.”
Once the game was finished Fancy Pants took his leave. Celestia thought maybe she could rest here for a little. In the garden courtyards surrounded by the hedges, the flowers, and the empty place where Discords statue had once stood.
It was peaceful, quiet and a rainbow fell from the sky and landed in front of her on the other side of the table.
Celestia blinked a few times as Rainbow Dash sat there staring at the chess table with a confused look in her eyes. Her mane was frazzled and the feathers on her wings looked out of place. There were traces of lipstick smeared on her cheek and eyeliner smeared on her eye. “So… how do you play this?”
Celestia continued to stare.
Rainbow Dash eventually looked up. “What?”
With a sigh Celestia’s horn began to glow and a washcloth was summoned from thin air as well as a hairbrush. “I will teach you how to play, but stand still for a moment.” She cleaned the half finished makeup off of Rainbow Dash’s face and worked on brushing the mare’s mane. Meanwhile she was also focusing on preening the feathers a little to make them more approachable. It reminded her of when Twilight first got her wings, the poor thing had no idea how to preen and Celestia spent hours a day for a couple of weeks teaching her what she would have been taught for years if born as a pegasus.
Rainbow Dash’s face was a bright shade of pink the whole time. Once Celestia was finished and Rainbow Dash was back to her normal self Celestia smiled. “Looking cool, Rainbow Dash.”
She grinned. “Thanks. Last time I let Rarity trick me like that.” She looked back at the chessboard. “So… what do I do to win?”
Celestia laughed. “Alright, alright. Let me teach you how to play and you can tell me all about what the big bad Rarity did to make your mane and face such a mess.”
“Deal.”
Celestia spent the better part of the next thirty minutes explaining the pieces and showing Rainbow Dash how they moved and how you were supposed to win. Once she had an idea of the rules they set forth to play their first game. While playing Celestia made sure to keep mental notes on everything, after all she just might need it and it might somehow prove useful for her escape.
“So,” Rainbow Dash began as she moved a pawn. “Rarity said she wanted to help me get laid, so I went with her to her room. What she didn’t tell me was that she and Pinkie Pie were working together to tie me up and use me as a doll to put makeup on. I mean, gross right?”
Celestia smiled as she followed Rainbow Dash’s example and moved her own pawn. “I personally think you’re beautiful without the need for makeup. You have a natural and rugged beauty.”
“Thanks!” Rainbow Dash’s chest puffed up with pride. She moved another pawn. “I tried to say that, I was all like, I’m too cool for makeup, you're ruining my coolness. My cool factor was being dropped like the temperature in the frozen north. I mean, how uncool is that?”
Celestia smiled moving one of her pawns. “Pretty uncool if you ask me.”
“Yeah, and then she tried saying, ‘but if you want to get Celestia or Luna to notice your beauty you need to accent it.’ Like my beauty or whatever doesn’t need an accent, that’s what Applejack has.”
A small laugh escaped Celestia as she moved a pawn to follow Rainbow’s obsessing with moving all of her pawns first. Even though she noticed the attention of a few ponies who were visiting the courtyard she ignored it. “You’re quite right you know, you are beautiful just the way you are. All of you are in fact, but I do know mares can be so obsessed with such things.”
Rainbow Dash moved her final pawn. “Do you like wearing makeup?”
“After a thousand years of life, not particularly, no. At some point you stop caring for personal beauty so much as you start caring for reputation.”
“Yeah well my reputation is all about being-“
“-Cool.” Celestia finished.
Rainbow Dash looked up and met Celestia’s eyes. “Uh… yeah…” her cheeks began to turn a little pink and she returned to the table moving her knight. She moved it like a rook and after a quick correction she fixed her mistake and moved it appropriately.
Celestia smiled. “I think you are probably the coolest pony in the castle right now. No matter what any of these nobles think of themselves.”
Rainbow Dash grinned. “Glad you could see it. You're pretty too you know.”
Celestia raised an eyebrow. “Pretty huh?”
“Pretty cool I mean.” Rainbow Dash’s face grew increasingly pink by the second. “And yeah… pretty, pretty too I guess.”
Celestia moved her rook. “Well I’m glad you think so.”
Rainbow Dash moved her queen leaving her king wide open. “You know I have no intention of listening to Twilight.”
Celestia smiled. “As you shouldn’t. You are your own mare, you should make your own ‘cool’ decisions.”
Celestia moved her queen next and smiled. “Checkmate.”
“That means I lost right?”
“Yes, yes it does.”
Rainbow Dash shrugged, and then a wicked grin spread across her lips. “Well I guess I get to make my own choices right? Just like in this game?”
Celestia nodded. “I have always found chess to be a good metaphor.”
Rainbow Dash hovered into the air with a few flaps of her wings. “Thanks… guess I got to give the winner a prize now.”
Celestia shook her head. “No need to do that, this is just a friendly game between fiancés and friends.”
Rainbow Dash’s grin widened. “Yeah, but I’m choosing to do that.”
“Oh, then what would you give me as a-“
Rainbow Dash bolted forward, her lips met Celestia’s. It was nowhere near as furious or as passionate a kiss as the one with Twilight. It lasted for more than a few seconds but not long enough for Celestia to lose control again, not that she would. Rainbow Dash pulled away. “Wow, minty fresh. You really are good at chess, ten steps ahead and all that.”
No, no she wasn’t. She just didn’t want to taste Twilight’s stomach contents all day. The howl of a screaming banshee sounded from nearby. Everypony that was currently ogling Celestia and Rainbow Dash after the kiss suddenly looked to the entrance of the castle. Celestia and Rainbow Dash followed their gaze. She feared Twilight had seen this and lost what little of her self-control she had. Instead, it was Rarity marching toward her with a rope levitated in one aura and a makeup bag in the other.
Rarity nearly screamed as a poor guard was trying to hold her rear leg back but being dragged across the ground by the overzealous mare. “Rainbow Awesome Dash! You run away from my experimentation just to go play hookie with the princess! She is our bride and you should only kiss her after you are dressed up and look appropriate! Now come back here this instant!”
Rainbow Dash blew a kiss to Celestia and with a single flap of her wings vanished into the sky leaving a rainbow trail behind revealing that she was heading back inside. Rarity screamed and Celestia actually saw a cocktail glass nearby behind held by a noble shatter in response. Rarity turned and galloped back inside. The poor guard being dragged behind.
He pleaded with Princess Celestia. “Rainbow Dash said I had to hold her back, please help me!”
As those two disappeared back into the castle, Celestia couldn’t help it. She began laughing.
By the time Twilight had gotten done expelling her breakfast as if she had been possessed by a demon the carpet here was probably ruined. Honestly this felt like the last time she dared at a quesadilla. Never again she told herself with those… unfortunately she couldn't say the same for Celestia. No matter how horrible the after effects of having a massive tongue shoved far enough into her throat that her nose could taste it, the actual sensation was amazing.
Still the seed of something had been planted into Twilight’s mind, something that she had never considered and now couldn’t get out of her head. What would she have done if Celestia had not kissed her to prove she did indeed feel attraction toward Twilight? Going on a magical rampage felt too generic. Throwing herself off the highest tower of the castle, on reflection, wouldn’t work if she was immortal. Killing an alicorn was, well as far as she was aware it was impossible.
So what was really left for her?
That one question got stuck in the gooey mess that was her mind. Somewhere between imagining Celestia kissing her again, though perhaps less deep, and thoughts of Celestia kissing her even deeper until her tongue filled every twist and turn of Twilight’s insides… an uncomfortable thought but one that she couldn’t erase. There the one question stood, what was left if Celestia didn’t love her?
The one answer that came to her was one she found herself surprised by. There was something left for her, or somepony rather. She had felt a small amount of interest, of curiosity toward the mare, especially after all the dreams she’d had. Still in the waking hours she hadn’t given it more than a few seconds of thought, now she was thinking about it for minutes at a time.
Luna was there. Her dark-lit beauty was something to behold. The mischievous and playful nature of her was amazing. Rumors of her passion were unrivaled. Honestly if even half the things Twilight heard of, and understood, were true, then it would take six mares minimum to make Luna truly happily ever after.
While Cadance was busy using the most industrial-strength magic she could to cleanse the carpet Twilight excused herself intent on going to her old room. She was pretty sure a toothbrush was still there. Her mouth still tasted... awful.
On the way to her room she was stopped just out front of it by Pinkie Pie. The bouncy mare smiled at her. “Hiya, Twilight!”
Twilight stared at her. “Oh, hey, Pinkie. How’s your day going so far?”
She put a hoof to her chin. “Well you keep threatening me whenever I try to get close to Celestia, so not as good as I’d like.”
That stung… “I’m sorry. I don’t mean too. I just… I don’t like the idea of sharing.”
“Well I don’t think any of us have a choice now, she’s marrying all of us you know.”
“Not that she wants too.”
Pinkie Pie blinked. “What does that mean?”
Twilight swallowed. “I mean, just that I’m sure she really just wants to marry me and this was the only way she could think of to accomplish it.”
Pinkie Pie giggled. “True nuff! But she’s still marrying us all and I have it on good authority she might be interested in what that could mean.”
“Pinkie, I’m not interested in this conversation right now.”
Pinkie Pie giggled. “Okie Dokie Lokie! Then I’m going to tell you what I really wanted all along.”
Twilight stared at her. “And that is?”
“We aren’t just marrying the princesses you know.”
Twilight could feel her eyes wanting to burst out of her head. “Oh who now? Discord, Chrysalis, no wait, we’re all going to marry Miss Smarty Pants as well.”
Pinkie Pie giggled again and brushed a hoof over Twilight’s chest fluff. “No silly, we’re all marrying each other.” She made a particularly sly look in her eyes, a matching smile grew on her lips. “I’ve always thought I’d only be happy if I could marry my best friend, but I couldn’t pick just one. Now I don’t have too!”
Twilight stared at her. “W-what are you suggesting?”
Pinkie Pie bounced forward and her lips met with Twilight’s. Without any thinking the pink mare’s tongue slipped inside and rolled around with Twilights. For a moment Twilight froze, then she pushed forward with her own tongue remembering the feeling she had with Celestia. Oddly enough Pinkie’s mouth tasted like frosting. After only a few seconds Pinkie’s tongue froze. She backed up and pulled herself away gagging and coughing.
Twilight froze. “Oh no, I’m sorry, I’m really bad at this.”
Pinkie Pie gagged. “What did you eat? It tastes like pancakes, only after they’ve already been mostly digested.”
A cold sick feeling was washing over her. “I um… I may have thrown up.”
Pinkie Pie’s cheeks turned green. She galloped away as quickly as she could nearly screaming words so fast most of them blended together. “Thanks for the kiss. Ihavetogototherestroomnowbye!”
Twilight had barely caught what the mare had said but she knew it meant she was probably disgusting. Well two kisses down, one made her vomit and the next made another pony vomit. Brushing her teeth was the least of her concerns, she needed some Celestia Fire Whisky to wash away the fact that apparently her kisses were cursed.
Opening the door she trotted inside and shut it behind her. It was clean but looked untouched from the last time she was in here. Except for the bed which was a bit of a mess. Going to it she could actually smell Spike’s scent on it. He must have arrived last night and she missed him. She was quick to grab a toothbrush from her armour and using a bit of magic and some toothpaste began brushing her teeth.
There was also a paper bag on the bed. She opened it up and pulled out a magazine with a very attractive pegasus mare on the cover striking a pose that made twilight’s eyes focus on the flanks.
Twilight spoke around the toothbrush in her mouth. “Oh yes! The educational material.” While busying herself brushing her teeth she sat down and opened the magazine.
The first page she jumped to showed two mares in a rather uncomfortable position. Their hooves must have slipped because they were both rubbing… oh… no they were looking right at the thing they were rubbing. Was this… was this what Celestia expected of her? Twilight could do this, well her hoof was maybe a little too small for Celestia’s bounty, but she could try. Flipping to the next page Twilight found herself utterly confused and winging in imagined pain. One mare was looking like she was having the most pleasurable massage of her life, only she wasn’t having one. Instead there was another mare with some kind of strange tool shoving it where things normally came out of, not into.
It took Twilight a moment before she frowned to herself and said simply. “But that hole’s for pooping. She’s just going to cause some blockage and swelling from… ouch.”
Another page, another strange procedure she was not familiar with. She started to think about it and realized one important thing as she flipped through these pages. “Luna didn’t prepare me for crap. How was I supposed to know that I was supposed to do that! I don’t even… I’m pretty sure that pony’s peeing!”
She really longed for the dreams of just being licked in strange places and caressed awkwardly until she woke up. Also Luna didn’t ever try to choke her with her tongue. In fact Luna, at least dream Luna, was really good at kissing. If Twilight remembered right.
Weird, the more she thought of Luna the more she imagined some of the less disgusting or painful looking things with the dark alicorn. Maybe this book was actually useful after all. Of course she didn’t understand why she had never seen a book like this before. She ran a library, and libraries had magazine sections, sure not the best but they existed. She made a mental note to try and stock some of these in the Golden Oaks Library later… or on second thought maybe just under her bed for educational purposes.
She made a mental note to thank Spike for this. There were some really interesting things in this magazine. In particular she found a few kissing techniques she wished to practice on… somepony. Honestly at this point between Celestia, Luna, and Pinkie Pie, she didn’t really care who she practiced with so long as she got good and fast. Celestia was expecting her to be a proper wife, and what kind of wife can’t kiss her bigger beautiful alicorn wife properly? Not a very proper one, no not at all.
Twilight turned a page and her frown deepened. “But… but… isn’t sex just between two ponies? There’s like four of them there. HOW? It looks confusing, I’d just get lost… and… I have seven brides… and Pinkie said we were marrying each other… oh…”
After turning the page her toothbrush dropped from her mouth. “Okay, that’s it, I need help.”
She slipped the magazine into the paper bag and having fished with brushing she used some mouthwash and spit into the sink nearby. She was going to get help from somepony, anypony. Celestia, Luna, Cadance, heck even Rarity at this point would be better to advise her on exactly what she was looking at in this book.
Taking a step out of her door she marched down the hall looking for somepony she recognized. With luck she saw an old familiar door cracked open. She fully opened and walked into Shining Armor’s office. Spike was there and he smiled at Twilight waving at her.
Twilight waived back shutting the door behind her. “Thank you, Spike. This material is very helpful, unfortunately now I am very, very confused.”
Spike saw the paper bag and snickered, grabbed his bowl of gems and hopped off the chair. “Seat’s all yours, Twilight.” He walked to the door and with a hop he opened it and closed it behind him as he left.
Shining Armor looked at her. “What’s got you confused, Twilly?”
She opened the bag, pulled out the magazine. She had even marked the most confusing page with a lavender bookmark and opened it up to show Shining Armor. “Explain, how, now.”
The look he gave the magazine was the same kind of look most ponies gave the ursa minor when it rampaged through town. At least he wasn’t saying-
Shining Armor opened his mouth. “The horror.”
“Oh great, and there it is. Now since I have a very real chance of ending up like this with my seven different brides I demand an explanation on how, what I should do, and why they are doing that!” she pointed a hoof at two ponies who were doing the most confusing thing to each other.
Shining Armor began to rise. She heard a thud from under his desk as if something just unseen, hard, and huge must have hit the underside of the table when he tried to stand. He promptly sat back down. “Okay… guess I’m not getting out of this one am I?”
“No.”
He groaned. “Okay, fine. Let’s uh… let’s go to something a little easier to digest first.”
She flipped the book back a few pages.
He coughed. “That’s her butt!”
“That’s what I said.”
“That cannot feel good.”
“That’s what I thought.”
Shining Armor cringed. “This… can we please ask Cadance for help?”
Twilight glared at him. “You’re my big brother, you’re supposed to teach me everything. Normally about boys, but seeing as how neither of us know or want anything to do with them, let’s focus on the one thing you have experience with.”
“Mares?”
“Mares.”
Needless to say Twilight picked the wrong teacher. His explanations, although something more than she had before were lacking and even he was stunned by some of the things in the magazine. If he was shocked, then it was clear that these were not normal proceedings for the mating ritual. If that was the case, she could at least figure out how many ice packs she would need for her rear end. She also wondered how many she would need for any other parts of her body once seven mares got done doing whatever it was they wanted to with her.
She intended to pester both Luna and Cadance about this next.
After receiving the bulk of the information she needed from Shining Armor as well as learning the magazine she was in possession of was something ponies used for personal pleasure she felt both better and worse at the same time. She was also told that these magazines might be illegal to put in an open section of the library, something about them being restricted to eighteen year old ponies. Which then brought up the question of how old she was again. She was nineteen perfectly old enough for a ‘dirty’ magazine. Though she wasn’t quite sure why it was called dirty when it was clearly kept in good shape.
She secreted the magazine back to her room. No intention to use it but it was technically on loan from Big Mac. She’d need to make sure Spike returned it… oh Spike wasn’t eighteen… well those were pony laws for ponies. Spike was plenty old enough and seemed to know more about these things than she ever did so he must be ready for this kind of stuff. At least that’s the comforting lie she told herself to make sure she didn’t think much harder about why he had such a thing.
After storing it away safely under her bed she went out intent on the second most important thing she was going to do that day. She was looking for Princess Luna, her other soon to be wife. She’d not been in the right headspace to properly investigate her sooner and after realizing that even if she were to ever lose Celestia she might still have Luna, well… she would be happy with that. Hurt beyond all belief and a mess for many, many years, but happy.
Searching around the castle had revealed nothing. She caught Cadance and Shining in their room. Shining Armor sniffing and asking, “Why does it smell like vomit?”
Cadance replied by dragging him into the bed. “Don't worry about it. It's time for baby making attempt number six hundred and seventy two.”
Twilight made sure to close the door they so carelessly left open. Soon she found Pinkie Pie and Rarity chasing Rainbow Dash around the castle with a makeup set. Poor Rainbow Dash could escape Rarity but with Pinkie’s help she was going to be caught eventually.
Applejack and Fluttershy were in one of the game rooms. They each had a set of cards in front of them. Applejack asked. “Do you have any kings?”
“N-no… I’m sorry. Um, Go Fish?”
Applejack cringed. “Don’t be sorry Shy. You’d be losing if’n you did.”
Well she’d leave them alone to their game. At least they weren’t trying to play solitaire together. They didn’t have access to Twilight’s personal rulebook for two player solitaire after all. Moving further on she began to realize she was being followed by a guard. She lowered her head and stopped to let the guard catch up. He got within ten feet of her and stopped. Turning around she met his eyes and realized she knew this gray pegasus. “Wind Fury?”
He nodded. “My princess.”
“The stallion who always role-played as a female bard?”
His cheeks turned a bit pink. “You uh… remember that?”
She smiled. “Well if any pony was going to be my personal guard, I’d ask for no better.”
He smiled. “I’ll be the best guard to ever serve you, Princess Twilight.”
“Good, then show me where my wife is. I need a discussion with her.”
He blinked.
“Luna, specifically.” Multiple brides Twilight, this was going to be a nightmare.
He nodded and began leading the way. “Her schedule for the day rarely changes. It has only been greatly changing these past few days. For the most part during the day one can find her in her private quarters. Though the law states if anypony should wake her for anything less than limited time cake sales or for a fire that is currently raging inside of her room, then they are subject to any and all of her whimsies.”
Twilight rolled her eyes. “I am one: a princess of Equestria. And Two: her future wife. I think I’m always going to be the subject of her whimsy.”
Wind fury cringed. “The last guard who accidently woke her up discovered the rough way that he was in fact gay.”
Twilight looked at him. “How does that happen?” She thought about it for a few seconds and then decided. “Never mind. I’ll ask her myself if I actually care that much.”
Once at the dark and cushioned door he nodded and began to back off. “I trust you will be safe, but I fear the same will not be said for myself.”
Twilight grinned. “Good, besides I won’t need any extra company for what I’m looking for in here.”
***
After what felt like a good hour of running around the castle even Rarity’s energy faded. With Rainbow Dash not stopping for an instant she decided to leave the thing alone. Catching her kissing Celestia was cute, and a good sign for their upcoming marriage, but it was also annoying that she was the fastest pony in Equestria.
Having finally given up the chase, Rarity made her way up to the royal wing and realized that with as quiet and as peaceful as it was she was almost completely alone up here. Fluttershy and Applejack were in the middle of a card game and Applejack was losing from the sounds of it. Pinkie Pie had vanished off to who knows where. Celestia was busy with her daily life and in her office with a very much ‘do not disturb’ kind of guard out front of it. Luna was obviously asleep.
Looking for Twilight proved only to find Spike the Dragon walking down the halls instead. He smiled and waved as he made his way toward her. “Hi, Rarity.”
Rarity smiled down at him. “Hello, Spike.”
Rarity saw an empty lounge room nearby and led him into it. “So, how has your trip to the castle been going so far?”
“Got to listen as Shining Armor tried to explain what porn was to Twilight. That was hilarious.”
“Are you kidding, no way? How has she not seen any before, especially not your copy of Dragon Butts?”
“I hide that stuff in the one place she’ll never look.”
She stared at him. “Where at?”
“Inside a hollowed out copy of Quesadillas And How to Make Them.”
Rarity nodded. “I see, I hear Twilight has problems with them.”
“They are very cheesy.”
Rarity wasn’t sure why that would bother Twilight when her favorite food was Spike’s Dragon Roasted Nachos… actually those might be her favorite as well, but she’d never tell the little dragon. It would go straight to his ego and his crush… speaking of which. “Spike, I fear we may need to talk.”
He took a seat on a lush red couch. “Probably. Your life is going completely bats right now.”
She took a seat next to him but left a good foot or two of distance. “About your feelings toward me.”
He chuckled.
“What? What’s so funny? Aren’t you heartbroken?”
Spike stared up at her. “I was, for a long time, like last year when I saw you and Applejack kissing. After that though it all made sense and even if I still think you're hot, I’m not going to try dating you or anything.”
She blinked. “So… you gave up on me?” somehow that revelation stung.
“Well, yeah. It’s not worth chasing something you can’t get.”
She stared down at him. Was he rejecting her? No, no, no, and more no. “But if you tried hard enough, maybe you could?”
He shook his head. “Not going to bother trying. There are other mares out there for this handsome dragon.”
She licked her lips determined to make him notice her again so she could be the one to say he had to give up. He was not allowed to be the one to let her go. “Handsome is right.”
Spike stared at her. “I am?”
“Of course. In fact if Applejack and Luna hadn’t swept me off of my hooves I might even consider… well… I am marrying seven other ponies, what would adding a little dragon on the side hurt?”
Spike jumped down. “Yeah, no.”
“Excuse me?”
“I said no.” He began walking off. “I’m not going to tell anypony about this, but no.”
Rarity jumped off the couch. She was losing him. She had to do something, anything. She turned around and began shaking her hips. “You sure, if you leave you’ll never get to enjoy this.”
He didn’t even turn around as he walked out the door. “Sorry, Rarity. I’ll still help you out because I’m your friend but romance is meh.” He paused, took one last look back at her and laughed. “Nice butt though.”
With that he was gone. Rarity stood there for some time staring at the empty space. This did not just happen. That was a changeling in disguise right? Spike gave up on her, no… she just… she would shove this little event deep into the recesses of her mind, lock it up in a vault, and never dwell on it again.
Celestia’s head poked in. “Spike told me this is where I could find you, Rari-“
Celestia’s eyes were firmly on Rarity’s hindquarters as they were sticking up in the air drawing attention. Without a moment’s hesitation Rarity shook her hindquarters. “Interested in some marshmallow pie?”
Celestia turned around. “No, but I think there is cake somewhere I can eat in peace without a bunch of sex crazed mares trying to hump me off my throne.”
Well at least she was gone… and didn’t take more than a passing glance at her hindquarters. Somepony had to stare at it. She didn’t work really hard to maintain such a perfect booty for no reason. She nearly shouted. “I demand somepony stare at my butt!”
A servant with fur matching her own and a dark blue mane appeared as if out of nowhere. She came into the room and sat down. Rarity recognized her as her own personal servant. Vanilla Daze? That might have been her name. She spoke in a quiet, timid voice. “Are you sure?”
Rarity felt herself losing control. “I am positive.”
The mare made her best intent to stare. “I apologize if I am not doing this correctly. I am straight you see.”
Well… forcing a straight mare to admire her butt was probably the highlight of her day. Honestly even Fluttershy got more attention than she was.
***
Twilight sat in front of Luna lying on her massive but not quite Celestia sized bed. Their eyes were locked onto one another and Twilight could still taste pure night on her tongue. It was sweet, almost too sweet. “Well… um… that was nice.”
Luna’s eyes raced down Twilight’s body drawing invisible lines Twilight could almost feel. “Are you sure that all you wanted was a kiss?”
Twilight shook her head. “No, I wanted more, but I figured this was better taken care of first.”
Luna laughed. “It usually is. Now where else did thou want my lips to go?”
It took a moment before Twilight caught on, longer than she had wanted. Her face flushed red from the question. “N-nowhere. Yet… No, I had a question about how you um… feel about me?”
A dark blue wing reached out and gently stroked Twilight’s cheek. “I love you.”
“Why?”
“Why shouldn’t I? Thou are attractive, intelligent, and have an interest in our stars. One thing I so adore about thee is thy naivety and innocence. Of course it goes deeper than that.”
Twilight met those dazzling teal eyes. “Deeper?”
Luna let out a small sigh. “Please do not laugh.”
“I would never.”
“Thou are my hero… all of ye. I was trapped for so long in such a dark place, unable to feel warmth, love, or joy. It was like a nightmare I could not awaken from, most of the time I spent in that darkness I cannot even recall. The first memories I have are of thee and thy friends, thou were talking about the elements of harmony, going on the most heroic monologue I had ever heard. Then there was a blinding rainbow light, one that scared me, but felt so warm and loving. The next moment I noticed I was small, and these lovely heroes stood before me. Thou… you stood before me.
“I have had feelings for thou ever since that day, but feared with thine attraction to mine sister thou would reject me.”
Twilight snuggled into that wing. “I… I don’t know if I would have. Explaining it like that, I think I might have asked Celestia if it was okay. At this point I still don’t know if she’d allow it. Now that I’m marrying both of you though, I want to learn more about what could be between us. Not just theory though, I want practice.”
“Oh ho, so is that why thou came to me with a request for a kiss?”
Twilight laughed. “Yes, and you are a more gentle kisser than Celestia. Not sure if that’s better or not yet.”
Luna smiled. “I thought I smelled minty fresh breath. I assume Celestia forgot how long and thick her tongue is.”
Twilight pawed at the soft bed. “M-maybe…”
Luna’s hoof covered Twilight’s. “Do not fear, I may get passionate but I never forget just how much bigger I am than those I bed. It is understandable thou want to take things slowly, and I shall explore thee at thy own pace.”
Twilight smiled. “Those dreams you gave me were pretty nice too.”
Luna’s cheeks turned pink and she looked a little down. “Oh… so thou found out?”
“I haven’t told anypony yet, but I have a feeling they figured it out on their own. Still they were nice, and I’m starting to understand what you were trying to do in them.”
Luna smiled back. “It’s difficult when I can only work with what my dreamer is able to imagine themselves. I’m sure our dreams will become far more interesting from now on.”
Twilight smiled. “Just one rule.”
“Anything my bookworm.”
“No butt stuff.”
Luna frowned. “Are you sure? I quite enjoy it.”
Twilight matched her frown. “I don’t want to be in pain, Luna.”
“Oh no, I meant that I enjoy it.”
There was silence for a moment as Twilight’s mind began to work out what she was saying. Once she did Twilight felt her face grow pale. Part of her wanted to just throw up again. Instead she opted for the better option. “I’ll think… about it.”
Luna giggled. “The look on thy face is priceless. And do not worry, I will not force thou to ever do anything you are uncomfortable with. Even when me and my sister bed you, it will be only at a level thou are comfortable with.”
Twilight was about to ask if she meant bedding them both at the same time and thought better of it. She did not in fact want the answer to that. Unlucky for her she figured she might get that answer far sooner than she was comfortable with.
Rainbow Dash sat there staring at Pinkie. The smile from her earlier kiss with the sexy goddess of light still on her lips. She wasn’t going to tell anypony but with her focus on her career, and her focus on not letting ponies touch her, and her focus on sleeping all the time, she had hardly kissed anypony. Yet, none came even close to how Celestia felt. It was like kissing a light bulb, only without burning her lips.
“So,” Pinkie began. “Celestia’s a total milf right?”
Rainbow Dash blinked a few times and snapped out of her previous thought. “I don’t think she has any kids Pinkie.”
“Twilight.”
“Yeah but… they’re kinda getting married.”
Pinkie grinned. “I know right, its best kind of incest. The kind that your sister doesn’t yell at you for three hours, twenty two minutes and six seconds when you try to suggest it as a PSSSD present.”
“Pinkie, I don’t even know what that is, and after that description, I really don’t want to know.”
Pinkie Pie laughed. “Oh come on, you’ve had to have thought about incest with your sister before.”
“I don’t have any siblings.”
“Well duh, Fluttershy is your sibling.”
“No, Pinkie, she is not. And also I’m getting married to her too so… no.”
Pinkie Pie put a hoof to her chin. “Weird, I guess your dad really didn’t get Fluttershy’s mom pregnant after all. Even weirder, who did since you know, Fluttershy’s dad is sterile.”
There were two kinds of crazy Pinkie could have on a regular basis. There was the kind that was a little silly, kind of heartwarming and endearing. Then there was the kind that made some ponies consider possibilities and facts they had never thought about, and never wanted too. The kind of crazy that was terror incarnate. This time, this was one of those times.
Rainbow Dash stood up, turned around and walked away. She didn’t need to say anything as Pinkie Pie began mentally charting out the possibilities for whose Fluttershy’s dad was. All of them ending in, “Fluttershy’s mom only cheated on her husband once though.”
If Fluttershy had heard this clearly fictional piece of work she would have lost it. If Zephyr Breeze had heard it… he probably would have still hit on Rainbow Dash. The thought made her skin crawl. Ew, romancy stuff… well maybe not so much ew if it was Celestia.
Leaving the confines of the hall she was in with Pinkie, Rainbow Dash saw Applejack standing at a doorway staring at something inside. The way she looked at it reminded her of how she looked whenever she saw some fresh apple cider. Not being able to pull herself away from such a delicacy she walked up to Applejack. “Sup?”
Applejack smiled. “Nothing, just watching a marshmallow having a meltdown.”
“Melted marshmallows? Sounds tasty.” Rainbow Dash stuck her head in and saw a servant sitting perfectly still with a bored expression on her face. The servant was staring right at Rarity’s hindquarters as the mare shook her booty. Applejack was watching with a satisfied smile.
Rainbow Dash turned her head sharply, even she couldn’t resist the temptation of staring at that alabaster butt too long. Rarity hissed. “Don’t you dare look away, Rainbow Dash! Get your gay flank back in here and stare at my butt! It’s attractive!”
Rainbow Dash stared at Applejack. “A meltdown you say?”
“Apparently Celestia turned down looking at Rarity’s behind. In fact Spike pretty much just dumped her.”
Rarity cried. “HE DID NOT! I AM PRETTY AND HE LOVES ME!”
Rainbow Dash took a few careful steps backward. “Uh-huh… good for him I guess.”
A light blue aura wrapped around Rainbow Dash’s neck and she felt herself being dragged forward. Rarity cried out once more. “YOU WILL WATCH MY BUTT! You will even touch it should I demand.”
The servant let out a sigh. “I’m still straight you know.”
Rarity cried. “HUSH YOU! You just watch, Rainbow gets a mouthful of soon to be princess pie!”
Applejack chuckled and picked up an apple from under her hat. “Knew this would come in handy some day. When you get the signal, run fer it.”
Rainbow Dash nodded.
Applejack pulled her hoof back. Rarity shouted. “If you throw that, I am going to make you come in here and clean my entire body with your tongue!”
Applejack grinned. “Shouldn’t make promises you can’t keep.” She threw the apple and hit her target dead on. The apple slammed home into the unicorn’s horn and then got stuck. The aura vanished from Rainbow Dash’s neck and she was free. The second she was free she was already flying as fast as she could to get away from Rarity. What was the day coming too? First she kissed Celestia, which was nice, then Pinkie suggested… nevermind what she suggested. Finally Rarity was trying to get her taint all over Rainbow Dash because apparently Spike dumped her. She didn’t even know they were dating. Did Spike know that? She was pretty sure he didn’t even know that.
She made a mental note to congratulate the little guy later. Rarity always did seem a bit manipulative with him. Poor guy never deserved that. Still it seemed Rarity’s turn to go completely bonkers. She wondered where Twilight could be at that moment, if she was sane enough maybe she would be able to help out?
Rainbow Dash may not know where she was, but she knew where Twilight would be. She flew down the halls. One of the doors was open and she saw Cadance, Fluttershy, and Luna inside a pink room. They might know. Rainbow Dash doubled back and opened the door.
Before she could even speak she saw them. They were all wearing the sexiest, kinkiest things she’d ever seen since the one time she went into Rarity’s basement. In fact the white and pink thing with the saddle Fluttershy wore looked just like one that was in Rarity’s basement… Luna wore something black and slinky and filled with far too many holes to ever be considered public wear. Cadance had joined in the fun as well, wearing something deep red and see through.
The trio looked at Rainbow Dash. Fluttershy’s face turned bright red but she didn’t hide herself, instead her little tail lifted up a little and began swishing back and forth. Luna smiled evilly. Cadance rolled her eyes.
Nope. Rainbow Dash closed the door and flew away. Thinking about Fluttershy ‘her not-sister’ in those clothes only made parts of her far warmer than they had any right to be thinking about Fluttershy. She flew around the corner and was back in the hallway with all of their rooms. She took the nearest dive into a room hoping to hide herself as the word incest crawled into her brain.
Once inside she closed and locked the door and slid to the floor turning around only once at the bottom. This was a very stuffy desk and it smelled… it smelled really weird. A bookshelf, a writing desk. A purple bed with a lavender unicorn on it who’s hoof was firmly between her legs as her eyes were staring at a magazine revealing various mares in the middle of mating. A painting of Celestia on the wall.
Rainbow Dash felt her jaw drop.
Twilight looked over and sighed. “Seriously? I don’t even… what do you want, Rainbow Dash?”
“To die.”
“Well, I’m not going to be the one to kill you.” Twilight’s smile made Rainbow Dash flinch. Her eyes met Rainbow’s and promises of dark passion were made with just a look. “I might need a study partner.”
Rainbow Dash went to the door and tried to unlock it only to find a magical aura surrounding it. Taking a few steps back Rainbow Dash prepared for a head first charge. Her tail moved on its own and Twilight whistled. “So that’s what it looks like when you’re actually paying attention.”
Instinct kicked in, as well as one of Rainbow’s rear hooves. Her rear leg lashed out and she felt it connect with something and heard a shriek as Twilight flew back and hit the bed. The magical aura dropped and Twilight stood up covering her eye with a hoof and staring in shock at Rainbow Dash.
Twilight groaned. “Why did you lock the door if you didn’t want- ow.”
She wasn’t going to get another chance and Twilight wasn’t dead yet. Rainbow Dash took off through the door and flew away as quickly as possible. She zigzagged through hallways, rooms, and eventually out a window. She circled the castle feeling way too out in the open here and saw a large balcony. She flew toward it and through an open glass door.
Once more she found herself in Celestia’s quarters, this time the alicorn herself was in here, at writing at a desk. She looked back to see Rainbow Dash. “Rainbow Dash, you might be my bride but there is a rule about knocking first.”
Rainbow Dash took a seat. Closed her eyes and laid herself down flat.
Celestia’s voice came out as warm as any hearth on a freezing cold night. “Rainbow Dash, um… honey? Are you okay?”
Rainbow Dash groaned. “I think the entire castle is filled with mares who want to sleep with me, except for Luna.”
“I wouldn’t rule that one out just yet.”
Rainbow Dash curled into a ball and groaned again.
“Are you okay?”
“No, I’m not. I was cool with this at first. Luna’s a sweetheart and she really gets me but this is insanity. Who thought an eight-way marriage was a good idea?”
A warm laugh escaped Celestia’s lips sounding more like sunshine the longer it went on. “You’re telling me.”
Rainbow Dash opened an eye and saw Celestia still at her desk but turned to face her. “You… don’t want to marry us all?”
Celestia bit her lower lip. “I… I didn’t say that. I just think the way things are being handled is quite chaotic. You’d think Discord was behind all of this.”
Rainbow Dash let out a sigh. “How would you have handled it?”
“By at least choosing to spend a year courting each of you before deciding whom I wanted to spend an eternity with. Due to ancient laws and my sister’s excitement that is not what happened.”
Rainbow Dash groaned again. “I thought I would be cool with this.”
Celestia’s horn lit up and a golden aura ran through Rainbow Dash’s mane drawing pleasing lines of heat across her scalp. “Nonsense, nopony is ‘cool’ with this. Honestly, Rarity was sitting in a room early demanding that I, princess of the sun, look at her rump. Now as funny as that was, it concerns me a great deal.”
“Yeah you’re not the only one.”
“I see. So she is still… doing whatever it is she is doing.”
“Losing her marbles, yes. Pinkie seems to think incest is fun, Fluttershy is wearing sexy clothes and not even shy about it, and Twilight was touching herself and asking me to help or something.”
Celestia blinked. “Oh… that is um… quite the development. It’s only been twenty four hours too.”
“Feels a lot longer than that.”
Celestia hummed in thought for a moment before pulling out a quill, inkpot and a spare scroll. “You know what always helps me when I’m stressed out and the world is confusing me?”
The items levitated over to Rainbow Dash before being set down. “Uhhh what?”
“I write letters. I never send them, and usually end up burning the ones I write. It still helps.”
Rainbow Dash rolled over and stared at the tools before her. “Well… I did always feel good about writing letters to you, even if I kind of suck at them.”
Celestia laughed. “Yours are some of my favorites. I still have every single one you ever sent me. I have all the ones you all sent me.”
Rainbow Dash looked up and met Celestia’s kind loving eyes. There was certainly a maternal energy to her. The kind of energy she could just lose herself in and spend the day with, not thinking about the screwed up stuff going on or how stressful it was or even how she was really uncomfortable with this whole situation all of a sudden.
Rainbow Dash picked up the quill and began to write. She was really bad at imagining the words in her head so she returned to the age old practices. “Dear Princess Celestia… hmm…”
Celestia watched her silently in the corner. Not saying a word and only smiling gently.
Rainbow Dash almost dropped the quill. “You’re really a milf you know that?”
“I… I’m not sure what that means but I take that’s a compliment.”
Rainbow Dash smiled. “It is… oh I got it.” She returned to writing. “Dear Princess Celestia, thank you so much for wanting to marry me. I know I’m pretty cool and all but it’s still really nice to think you care that much. My friends are all becoming weirdo perverts though. I mean, I make some lewd jokes and stuff sometimes but I’m not actually serious about it most of the time. I don’t even know if I want my first time to be with Luna you know, she’s sweet and all but it’s kind of a big deal and…” rainbow Dash crossed out a sentence. “I mean, I don’t want my…. Um… is there a cool way to say I’m a virgin?”
That sunshine laugh filled the room again. “Oh you are now?”
Rainbow Dash put the quill down. “I was busy okay. Sleeping, my career path as a wonderbolt, weird ponies trying to touch me in weird places. I’ve made out a few times but not much else…” She thought about it and then let out a sigh. “I really wish Twilight didn’t have dibs on you. You’re like, the safest pony I know… not that I’m looking for safety my first time. I’m Rainbow Danger Dash you know. I just… would rather it be you than somepony wearing sexy clothes and giving me looks like they have weird ideas for me.”
Celestia was quiet for a long moment. “Are you sure you’d want to give up something so important to me?”
“It’s either you, or one of the sex crazed mares in the castle. You’re the only one to not look at me like a, I don’t know, a piece of something.”
Celestia smiled. It was soft, sincere and warm. “I know that the marriage is only a few days away now, but there’s some time left to get acquainted with that sort of thing if there was anypony else you’d rather it be.”
“Well until five minutes ago I always thought I’d eventually talk Fluttershy into it. Now I don’t think I want to.”
Celestia nodded. “Well… as horrifying as it sounds, me and Luna have not discussed the order of our… wedding night operations. I know there are several expectations. Twilight as you say, has these so-called dibs on me. After her though I really don’t know what I’ll do.” Her smile faltered for a moment but quickly regained composer. “I could make you my second visit. Before Luna gets to you.”
Rainbow Dash groaned again. “Now it sounds like it’s not even meaningful it’s just like… a factory machine or something. I hated working at the rainbow factory.”
Celestia let out a quiet sigh. “With so many young brides, there is no way to avoid it sounding so mechanical. I assure you though, any mare I choose to bed receives my full and utmost attention. Although I do not seek such activity when it does happen I make sure to give my all to the pony I am with.”
“How come you’re the only one who says stuff like that but doesn’t look at me weirdly.”
Celestia smiled. “Because the wedding night is only the activity that leads to the deeper, much more meaningful relationship that I enjoy. I care more for the small moments like this, just a quiet conversation and a warm atmosphere than I do for somepony with me on my bed.”
Rainbow Dash looked at the letter and sighed. “Does Luna feel that way too or is she just after our butts.”
“I hear she does like the rump quite a lot. Of course I believe she really does love you all. She is still young mentally. To her sex is still fun and engaging. The other parts are a goal for her as well but her lust has not been fielded enough to sow those wild oats.”
Rainbow Dash smiled. “Well at least she loves us… okay, fine. I want you to be the pony to deflower me. Luna gets the sloppy leftovers… please don’t make me sloppy leftovers.”
Celestia laughed. “Of course I won’t. You might fall asleep afterwards though, ponies I bed tend to become exhausted… also you might need sunscreen.”
Rainbow Dash raised an eyebrow. “Sunscreen?”
“I tend to get a bit, hot.”
“Oh… wow, yeah… you uh… you already are.”
“Thank you,” Celestia said. “Now take your time writing. You may stay as long as you wish, I’ll just finish up with my task here.”
“Cool… um, could you help me edit this when I’m done. Twilight usually does but she’s kind of creeping me out right now.”
Celestia nodded as she turned back to her desk. “Of course I will. Who do you think taught her to write and edit in the first place?”
Unfortunately Pinkie’s implication of incest came crawling back at that moment. Yeah, this had to be awkward for everypony involved. No wonder everypony was losing their marbles all over the place. How long before Rainbow lost hers as well?
Normally Celestia would never leave any pony other than a trusted maid in her room alone. Seeing as how Rainbow Dash was her betrothed and just wanting a private place to hide in for awhile Celestia allowed her to stay in there unsupervised. For now it was time for her noon cake. Given the new guests in the castle she figured that there might be more ponies in the dining room for cake than just Pinkie Pie.
If there was one thing she knew about Pinkie Pie it was that she was a fan of her cake. So if anypony was going to be there it obviously had to be her. As Celestia took a seat she watched Pinkie Pie sit next to Celestia. She beamed a smile up at her. “Hello, Celestia.”
Celestia smiled. “Hello, Pinkie Pie. How are you enjoying the castle today?”
Pinkie smiled as she picked up the piece of cake on her plate. “I’m loving it here! I just can’t wait.”
“Wait for what?”
Pinkie Pie made eye contact, those bright blue eyes promising things that Celestia dared not think about in too much detail. “Waiting to taste your cake.” She opened her mouth, her tongue shot out like a frog’s tongue wrapped itself around the piece of cake on her plate and sucked the entire piece back in with one bite. She swallowed. “Yum.”
Somehow Celestia sincerely doubted Pinkie Pie was talking about eating the normal kind of cake. “I see…”
Pinkie Pie looked away and back at the cake. “This is really good, you should give it a try!”
Celestia had come down here for that exact purpose after all. Levitating a slice up to her lips she noticed something was different about this than usual. It seemed fluffier, the icing more delicately placed and it smelled even better than it ever had before. One small bite and it almost like Celestia was taken away to a different plane of existence. Her mouth watered as the vanilla flavor mixed in with something else, a hint of honey perhaps, no something sweet that she couldn’t quite define. Another bite and another delicious piece down. In a third powerful bite the piece was gone and she looked to the rest of the cake with hungry eyes.
Pinkie Pie gave a small laugh. “Seems like you enjoyed it.”
Celestia licked her lips. “It is delicious.”
Pinkie laughed again. “Thanks!”
“Thanks?” Celestia asked her
“For the compliment. I spent all morning baking this.”
Celestia stared down at her soon to be bride. She could not believe the mare had really spent all day on this, not with all the shenanigans she had gotten up to according to Rainbow Dash but she made it nonetheless. Looking back at the cake Celestia came to a painful decision. “You can stay.”
Pinkie gave a woot as she grabbed herself a second piece.
Yes, she could stay. If Celestia were treated to such delicacies even once a week by a mare like this, she could find herself marrying her and be content with it. Even if she did have to worry about the other activities that came with such a marriage the cake was worth it all. She greedily took several more pieces and shoved them onto various plates. She wasn’t stopping until this cake was done. Not more than five minutes later Celestia found herself and Pinkie had finished the entire cake.
Celestia leaned back in her chair and relaxed. This mare was a confectionary goddess. How lucky was she to be able to have her live in the same castle and giving her free delights every day. Well maybe not free, but instead of asking for the world's worth of diamonds and bits, or for her very soul, all Pinkie asked was to be loved. A simple task for the goddess of the sun, also known as the maternal goddess.
Pinkie Pie stood up next to Celestia. Hooves gently finding perch on Celestia’s leg to prop herself up. The warm touch sent shivers through her leg and thigh. After such a delightful meal she was in a very flexible position and the pink mare could probably talk her into almost anything. Instead Celestia looked over and saw the Pink head trying to get closer to her own just shy of reaching her face. Celestia caved and lowered her head for the mare. Pinkie’s lips pressed against Celestia’s and as quickly as they met they pulled away.
Pinkie Pie smiled. “I know that I won’t be able to plan this wedding, you know since Cadance is so excited for it. I’m still making us the best wedding cake anypony has ever seen.”
“Even better than this one? Could such a thing be possible?”
Pinkie grinned. “This, this was nothing. I just whipped this together today.”
Celestia’s eyes widened at the prospect. “I will love you until the day we both turn to dust.”
Pinkie laughed. “If I knew cake was the way to a princess’s heart I would have been doing this ages ago. Just keep in mind, Cadance only gets to plan this wedding. All the other parties are mine.”
Celestia wasn’t quite sure what she meant by all the other parties but she nodded either way. Simply transfixed by the idea of a cake that would be so much better that it made this one seem like nothing. If she ate such a cake, could she ever return to eating other cakes or would her taste buds become so spoiled that no cake would ever taste right again? It was worth the risk to try such divinity.
Pinkie Pie bounced away happily singing to herself. “La la la love, the Princess really loves me. La la la love.”
Well at least she was happy...
Leaving her there alone gave her a moment to think. Twilight was in love with her and after that all too powerful and far too embarrassing kiss earlier Celestia realized that her attraction to her former student was strong and even if this wedding were to be cut short, she would never be satisfied until she had taken the mare to bed. Even if it took a hundred years her control over herself would slip and she’d find herself in a position above Twilight, bodies entangled, tongues wrestling for dominance.
Then there was Rainbow Dash. There was certainly something about her. The way she was so willing to learn from Celestia and play with her without trying to molest her with her eyes. Rainbow Dash didn’t want Celestia because of her body, or at least not just because of it, she had found something she really liked in Celestia. Celestia may have found something similar in the young mare. After all she was pretty cool.
Now there was Pinkie. Even if Celestia were to break out of this marriage she was going to have to find a way to keep Pinkie to herself. The divine goods the mare could concoct at a moment’s notice were so great that she couldn’t let the chance slip by. In fact she was the first target for turning into an immortal, that level of skill did not come around but once in a thousand years. Even if Celestia had to marry Twilight and cheat on her with Pinkie to get her hooves on those goods, she would… not that she needed to worry about it with the marriage plans Luna had set up.
Well now even she was considering marriage… Was it too late to send Luna to the moon and pretend this whole event never happened?
***
Twilight was done with whatever study she was doing in her room that she didn’t want to think about. She was also done with Rainbow Dash. So done in fact that she didn’t even notice the black eye on her face after being so rudely kicked. All she wanted was somepony to help point out a few things, a pony she knew must have had a lot of experience with mares. After all Rainbow Dash was known to be pretty fast, clearly she had to have lots of experience with the romance stuff… okay so maybe Twilight wasn’t thinking and wanted a bit more than just knowledge but was that really any reason to kick her like that?
No, no it wasn’t. Rainbow Dash could have just said something. Instead of staring at Twilight as if she’d never seen a mare pleasuring herself before. Honestly what was Rainbow Dash even thinking? Oh right, she didn’t think, about anything, especially not about kicking one of the brides in the face and giving them a black eye. A black eye that as Twilight pointed out she did not notice was there because she was actively not trying to ignore it.
The mirror she was staring at on the other hoof was not helping in any way shape or form. There was honestly only one pony who might know how to cover this up before they got wed. Twilight refused to look like she had fallen down some stairs on her wedding night and a black eye like this was going to stay a week. So she made her way through the halls thankful that the place was quiet. She passed by her servant, the one that almost never spoke. Lucky for her she didn’t have to worry about the mare saying anything. It seemed Luna had found the only six completely straight mares in the castle to be their servants as well as the six gayest stallions to be their guards. It was almost as if she was worried somepony might abuse their power.
Twilight stopped and looked back at her servant. “Hey.”
The servant paused, turned around and bowed for her.
“I need you to deliver something for me. Could you be a dear and have the chefs prepare at least two dozen various pies and set them in Rainbow Dash’s private quarters? She loves her pie you see and I want her to feel as welcomed as possible in the castle.”
The mare nodded and with a trot she was off. How in the world did she remember that Rainbow Dash hated any pie not made specifically by Pinkie she would never know, but so long as Pinkie didn’t make them the mare was going to be horrified. Servers her right.
She found Rarity inside one of the lounge rooms with her rear end facing the door and her poor servant sitting down yawning as she attempted to look bleary eyed at Rarity’s butt. Applejack was there too. Twilight noticed the manic look in Rarity’s eyes as she spoke. “Stare harder! I don’t feel loved yet!”
Applejack replied. “Rares, mah diamond, if’n you just want to feel loved, why don’t we send yer poor servant back out and Ah can put you on the couch there and make you feel loved.”
Rarity’s servant raised a hoof. “I second that idea.”
Rarity glared at her servant and then Applejack. “NO! I need ponies to admire me for my beautiful butt!”
Twilight took several steps back thankful that nopony had seen her yet. So with Rarity losing her mind that left only one other answer and this one was going to be harder to deal with. Twilight walked down the halls until she found one of the known ‘pink’ rooms. Rooms which had intended functions for the more romantic side of things. Basically they were Cadance’s playrooms. Places she converted from when she lived in the castle and nopony had changed them as Cadance quite frequently visited.
She opened the door and saw Luna and Fluttershy. Fluttershy was floating in the air as Luna’s face was buried into her-
Twilight closed the door. She paused a moment. Opened the door again nodded and then closed it once more. Yep, they were doing things from that magazine of hers… well okay then. Twilight trotted off to the next pink room she could find. This time it was Cadance’s room. She opened the door and saw Shining Armor being levitated into the air. Cadance’s muzzle was buried into his…
Twilight gasped. “WHY ARE YOU DOING THAT! HE’S A BOY!”
Cadance looked away and had a tube of some sort in her mouth. It was probably more embarrassing that Twilight recognized it as hemorrhoid cream. Oh… that was um… Twilight felt her ears flattening behind her head.
Shining Armor wiggled in the air a bit. “She won’t let me put it on myself and won’t put me down.”
Cadance spat the bottle out and set her tolerant husband down. “Twilight, we are not doing the butt stuff… yet. He just refuses to actually use this on his own so I am forced to make him use it or he will complain all night long.”
Twilight shook her head. “Okay… better than I… what do you mean yet?”
Shining Armor cut her off by nearly shouting. “What happened to your eye? Did somepony hurt you? I’ll kill them.”
Twilight walked in, closed the door behind her and sat down. “It’s fine. Rainbow Dash and me had a disagreement, and she came out the victor.”
Shining Armor glared at nopony in particular. “Well… I can’t kill her but I at least hope you got her back just as good.”
Twilight smiled at the thought of how many pies were going to be sitting around in Rainbow Dash’s room. “Oh, I think I did.”
Cadance walked up. “Oh no, like this your wedding night might be ruined. Here let me help you.” Her horn lit up and soft soothing magic flowed around Twilight’s eye. “There.”
Twilight looked over to the mirror and saw herself. The bruise was missing from her face. She lowered her head. “Oh… I didn’t realize healing magic worked for that.”
“It kind of does.” Cadance replied. “The spell I used is a bit different. There are some mares, and stallions, who enjoy things a little rough and don’t want others thinking that they were abused so I came up with this spell.”
“What do you mean rough? Like they want to be kicked in the face or something?”
Cadance rolled her eyes as she explained. “Getting kicked in the face, choking, cutting, using piercing hooks in the back to-“
Twilight’s horn lit up and she was gone in a flash. There was no way she was going to stand there and listen to that.
“-using assorted tools to create piercings on their more sensitive areas.” Cadance said.
Twilight forgot there was an anti-teleportation spell in Cadance’s room. She turned around and walked to the door trying to open it instead. The door didn’t open. She looked back at Cadance. “Can I leave before you ruin me?”
The evil smile that grew over Cadance’s lips was all too known to the castle by this point. “No. No you can’t.” Her horn lit up and an illusionary copy of Celestia and Twilight appeared on the bed behind her. “I’m instructed to teach anypony who might be lacking in certain knowledge about how to-“
Twilight stared, mouth agape, as the two illusions were doing the most lewd of things to one another. Her hoof twitched. It was very, very challenging not to let her hoof go down and do what it wanted to while she watched the copies of herself and Celestia do such things on the bed.
Shining Armor cleared his throat. “Darling, I think she likes this too much.”
Cadance looked from the illusion to Twilight. “TWILIGHT!”
Twilight lifted her hooves. “I didn’t do anything!”
She stared right at Twilight’s horn. “Uh-huh, and please tell me what you are doing with your magic?”
“Not what you think I am… probably.”
The illusions disappeared. Twilight reached out toward them. “Nooooo!”
Cadance rolled her eyes. “Just go do that with Celestia, she’s going to be your wife in a few days, I’m sure you can convince her.”
Twilight let out a sigh. Cadance was probably right. Trying to find Celestia was becoming increasingly more difficult though… but there was one place Celestia would be no matter what. And when the time came she would make her move. Until then her hoof was twitching something fierce and she needed either to go back to her room for a while or to take a cold bath… or maybe hot bath.
Chapter Twenty Four: When Apple Trees See the Moon
Written by TheCrimsonDM
Applejack was just about fed up with this. Sure she’d take any chance to ogle her marefriend’s behind any day, but this was absurd. So far Celestia, Rainbow Dash and even Twilight had seen this spectacle and this was about where she drew the line.
Fluttershy walked in. “Oh um… is everything okay Rarity?”
Applejack looked back at her. “Run!”
Rarity rolled her eyes. “I’m not going to do anything to Fluttershy, Applepie.” She looked at Fluttershy. “Darling, could you be so kind as to compliment my butt?”
Fluttershy’s cheeks went from yellow to red faster than an apple falling from a tree. “Oh um… it’s big.”
Rarity’s eye twitched. “Excuse me?”
“I um… I like big butts. S-sorry… I can’t lie.”
Rarity’s eye was still twitching. “Please, leave, now.”
Fluttershy nodded and walked away. Applejack laughed. “Well you can’t deny.”
Pinkie Pie finished. “When you see that itty bitty waist and that big thing in your face.”
Rarity glared at her. “One more word about the size of my rear and I will find a way to punish you.”
Pinkie Pie bounced in. “Oh are we getting to stare at Rarity’s butt now? YES!” She bounced in and took a seat next to the very tired looking servant. “I’ve been wanting free access to stare at this thing for ages. Can I touch?”
Rarity smiled. “Of course, darling.”
Applejack interrupted. “Now hold on a second, Pinkie. You can’t just walk up and-“
Pinkie didn’t even hesitate to slap Rarity’s left flank causing the surprised mare to yelp and jump forward. For the first time in hours Rarity turned around and glared at Pinkie. “I said you could touch, not spank!”
Pinkie shrugged. “You’ve been naughty, forcing these poor fillies to stare at your butt. You probably need a good spanking.”
Applejack cut in. “Pinkie, just cus we’re all getting hitched to each other does not mean you get to just do whatever you want to mah Rarity.”
Rarity glowered at her. “I especially don’t appreciate being spanked… but thank you for trying. Now it’s time to make Luna and Celestia notice me.”
Pinkie Pie grinned. “Yeah, Luna’s a great kisser. You should ask her to do that with you.”
Rarity’s eye twitched again. “Is everypony going to get attention before me? I am the pretty one!”
“No, Fluttershy is the pretty one. You’re the sexy one.”
Rarity marched up to Pinkie, stuck out her muzzle and shoved it into Pinkie’s. “Excuse you, me?”
“You’re excused.”
Rarity’s ear flopped and her eye twitched. A blue aura surrounded her horn but Applejack couldn’t’ see what kind of spell was being cast. It took a moment but she saw a vase covered in a blue aura slowly drifting ten feet above them and heading toward Pinkie. She had to know that wouldn’t work on Pinkie, the pinkie sense would jump in. Applejack waited for it to kick in. Pinkie pie sat there. It didn’t kick in.
Pinkie Pie blinked a few times, put both of her hooves on either side of Rarity’s face, and somehow an extra pair on the back of Rarity’s head and started to kiss Rarity. The vase fell to the floor and shattered harmlessly next to Pinkie. The moment Applejack saw tongues she knew the mood had shifted and she was not happy about it. Still who was she supposed to be mad at, Rarity for being completely insane and technically kissing her fiancé, or Pinkie Pie for initiating said kiss.
Rarity pulled back and blinked a few times. One of her hairs popped out of place. “Applejack, you’re a great kisser.”
Pinkie Pie giggled. “I’m not Applejack silly.”
“Of course you are darling. I would never kiss anypony besides Applejack, maybe Luna but only Applejack.” Rarity walked past Pinkie and into the hall. Her steps were a little unsteady as she moved. “Now I’m going to go lay down, I’ve had a busy day my, Applepie and I think I need some alone time and some ice cream.”
Applejack knew who to be mad at now. “Pinkie Pie… we need to talk.”
Pinkie Pie was already gone. Where she went and when was beyond her. The servant was following Rarity and asking, “What flavor of ice cream do you need, Lady Rarity?”
“Apple flavor, and as much as one pony can carry.”
Applejack lowered her hat. “Well… this day keeps getting worse.”
She wondered where and what Fluttershy might be up to. If anypony was likely to be having a boring day it was probably her. Not like the mare was ever too crazy… well usually too crazy. In fact she decided to not think about what Fluttershy was currently up to. She instead chose to go walking around the castle some.
Normally she might be interested in chasing Rarity’s hind quarters into a room but the mare had been forcing ponies to stare at her butt for so long Applejack’s sex drive was as dead as the trees in the fruit bat infested parts of Sweet Apple Acres.
Thinking of home only made her feel down. What she wouldn’t give to just go home and be with family right then. A warm day doing hard work on the farm and enjoying the shrieks of Applebloom running around like crazy, or the soft singing of Big Mac as he was bucking trees. The creak of Granny Smith’s rocking chair. The way the wind rustled through the leaves on the tops of the trees.
Was she ever going to really get to enjoy all that again?
Wondering the lonely halls of the royal quarter all she really saw was empty space. Sure she would catch the sounds of her friends once in a while or see a guard or a servant walking down the halls. Anything else was quiet and lonely. Just leaving the royal quarter for a moment to go into the east wing she noticed there were significantly more ponies there. A lot more servants, nobles, visitors to the castle, heck there was even a tour going on that Applejack might have slipped into and watched as the tour guide, a stallion wearing a fancy suit, was explaining a piece of the artwork.
It was a painting of a white tree with pink leaves, with a smaller tree wrapped around it that was a blue-gray with dark blue leaves. The sky was dark and rumbled with storm clouds as these two trees stood together in a vast plane of barren rock and stone.
“This piece was a gift from the famous Vincent Van Goat, he saw the return of Luna and how troubling the times could be ahead and made this piece as a metaphor for the strength of our two Princesses and their strength to fight any evil.”
One pony in the crowd raised a hoof. “Is that going to be updated, because there’s going to eight princesses soon.”
Another pony pointed out. “There were three princesses when this was made, all in Equestria I might add.”
The tour guide let out a sigh as a torrent of similar questions hit him. One pony even dared to suggest, “Isn’t this Von Goat’s idea of Princest is Wincest.” To which half the crowd nodded in agreement the other half stared as if they weren’t sure what that meant.
Applejack could easily feel how awkward this was getting and slipped away. The poor tour guide was shaking his head slowly with eyes closed tight. It seemed like he was used to this kind of thing. Maybe they should move this painting out of the tour.
Slipping back into the royal wing she instantly felt the cold and lonely atmosphere hit her again. Did Luna and Celestia really like it so quiet? That dinner last night must have been a problem for them. Too much noise for quiet ponies Applejack figured.
Moving through the halls Applejack eventually saw Luna’s door. The door opened up and the princess herself walked out of it. She turned just long enough to look inside, smile and then gently close the door as if trying to not make too much sound. Applejack walked over to greet her future wife.
“Howdy.”
Luna stared at her with a smile and put a wing to her lips. “Shhh, she’s sleeping.”
Applejack whispered. “Who?”
“Fluttershy. Poor dear, she’s been awake most of the night and I so often forget that most ponies are not used to those hours.”
Applejack nodded. “Ayep.”
“Walk and talk?” Luna suggested.
Figuring why not she followed Luna as they walked away from the door. As much as she really didn’t want to know she also really wanted to know. So it was only natural when applejack asked, “So… Fluttershy and you been tussling much?”
Luna stared at her. “Tussling? What is that?”
“Uh, sex.”
Luna laughed. “Oh ho, well, maybe. I’m fairly certain I would say it is not very much at all, but my appetites are quite voracious compared to those of a normal pony. But keep in mind I’m still holding back with her.”
Applejack raised an eyebrow. “You are?”
“Well I wouldn’t want to ruin her body before marriage.”
Applejack flinched at that. “And uh… what about the rest of us.”
“Even I know restraint. Of course… I could ruin all of ye…”
Applejack didn’t like the sound of that. They turned into a small antechamber with purple curtains lining it and a window that showed a nice view of Canterlot far below them. A long couch lay against the walls and Applejack climbed up to take a rest. “Should Ah even ask?”
Luna grinned and trotted in place. “Of course you should!”
“Okay… how?”
Luna’s horn lit up. “Like this!”
What Applejack expected was Luna to show her some kind of weird spell, or even a sex toy. What she did not expect was for Luna to go from Princess to Prince. The muscle bound stallion looked at her, rough, rugged, his every bold feature was tapered only by a look of age that made him seem far more mature than Luna ever had. The worst part was the thing between his legs and it was at full attention.
Luna cleared his voice. “Ahem, so Applejack, my love. What do you think?”
Applejack stared, her mouth suddenly felt very, very wet. It wasn’t the only part of her feeling that way and by golly if her tail didn’t go back down and stop moving on its own she was going to cut it off. That voice was the last piece of the puzzle. So deep, strong, yet gentle. It was the kind of voice that gave mare’s orgasms.
Luna smiled. “I see you enjoy this form. I knew it was a good idea to deal with this. Now tell me.” His wing reached out and brushed the side of Applejack’s face. Hot lines of pleasure went soaring through her face and down her body. Applejack knew she was blushing something fierce but she couldn’t stop it if she wanted too… and she didn’t want too. “Do you want to try me out?”
Applejack couldn’t speak. She couldn’t move. All she could do was lean into those feathers as Luna leaned over. His breath fell gently upon Applejack’s lips, even his breath smelled like pure masculinity. Oh by Celestia’s shining flanks, she wanted him to take her then and there, on that couch. Rarity be damned this was their wife/husband.
Their lips met and Applejack felt herself going crazy. Her eyes closed tightly and she felt her body going numb. Luna’s face began to shrink and when she pulled away Luna was a female once more. Applejack stared dazed for a moment. Luna looked at herself. “Oh… that’s harder to keep up when I’m. I promise I shall practice it for thee.”
Applejack moved her lips slowly and then her brain began turning. When she tried to sit up she realized this couch cushion was going to need a wash. “Uh… right.”
Trying very hard to ignore the mess she made Applejack focused on something else. Anything else. The one thing that kept coming back to her mind today was here once more. “It’s uh… quiet here isn’t it?”
Luna sat down. Her smile faltered a little. “It… is.”
“Don’t you and Celestia like that?”
“I don’t know about my sister but I have lived on the moon for the past thousand years. I am so done with quiet.” Luna smiled but her eyes looked sad. “The life the six of ye have brought here is more than I can ever thank thee for. The dinner last night… twas the first time I’ve felt full since my return.”
Applejack hadn’t considered that even if Celestia liked the quiet and the distance, Luna needed attention, activity and love. In fact wasn’t that what brought her to become evil in the first place. Wasn’t it the reason why Celestia and Twilight and anypony who was still sane were terrified of breaking Luna’s heart?
Putting herself in Luna’s horseshoes for a moment Applejack realized that this was probably the worst place imaginable without her friends here. Just quiet servants that acted like ghosts. A sister that slept all night long. A world where ponies slept during the night and few were brave enough to really talk to her…
Applejack sat up and reached out with a foreleg wrapping it around Luna’s neck. She brought her in, not for a kiss but for a hug. A tight hug with all the strength she could muster. Luna froze for a moment and then returned the embrace with those wings that swallowed Applejack whole. It was dark in that embrace. Dark, but it was warm, and safe.
Applejack whispered. “Ah never knew you were so lonely. Yer welcome on the farm anytime you want. Ah’d be honored to have over fer dinner.”
Luna rubbed her face into Applejack’s back. “That means… so much to me.”
Applejack pulled back a little and watched as Luna did the same. She leaned over and kissed Luna on the cheek gently. “Now don’t go tellin’ anypony that Ah’m soft like that okay?”
Luna smiled. “It will be our secret.”
“Good, and if’n yer looking for noise. Pinkie’s a good bet.”
Luna’s wings flared and that warm loving embrace left her. With a turn Luna began walking away. “I shall find Pinkie immediately then, she is the pony of fun after all.”
Applejack watched her leave. “Hmmm… not as good as watching Rarity walk away, but close enough.” She then remembered she needed to find a way to clean the mess she made on the couch cushion… would anypony really be upset if she just flipped the cushion over? It wasn’t like anypony was ever going to come to this couch again or on it for that matter.
To say that it has been an awful day for Rarity was like saying that the one time Applejack became the owner of her boutique the poor farm pony didn’t just run it into the ground. Which she did. It took a long time to get the money back to fix the mess left behind and still she hadn’t quite fixed the mess. As for the monstrosities that Applejack called ‘dresses’, she had taken them to the volcanic pits which once imprisoned Queen Chrysalis herself and dumped them into the cleansing fires never to be seen again.
So, now she sat there in her room with many empty tubs of ice cream littering her floor. Thinking about how Spike dumped her. Sure they weren’t dating but he had always been in love with her and to hear he gave up on her, it was heart wrenching. Then to know everypony looked at her butt yet had zero interest in it besides her loving Applejack only meant that she was in even worse shape than before. How could she marry the princess of the sun and the princess of the moon if neither had any interest in her?
Woe be to Rarity that nopony was interested in her. Applejack didn’t count because she was always interested in her. Woe be to Rarity the most unloved of the six lovely brides. Also she was the prettiest one and nothing Pinkie said would do anything to change that.
An idea came to mind. She knew exactly what she needed to do, even if she had to beg. Hoping out of bed she looked around. Luna really did know her well to know to stock some makeup supplies in a nearby drawer, even if most of the colors were more towards the goth variety she found a lovely shade of blue to match her eye shadow.
Now all she had to do was find a princess and she could make them love her. She was more than just something to put on a shelf and admire. She was sexy, full of vitality, and ready to get down and dirty with whichever princess caught her attention first.
Leaving the room Rarity made her way down the halls. It wasn’t long before she saw Applejack who seemed to be messing around with a cushion on a couch. “Darling, my Applepie, where is it I might find Luna?”
Applejack jumped back and looked around nervously. “Luna? Ah wouldn’t know, why would Ah know?”
Rarity scoffed. “Fine, I’ll just go check her room. We are welcome any time, at least if we’re willing to let her have her way with us if I understand correctly.”
“Yeah, uh… you do that. Tell me how it goes.”
Rarity smiled and gave her a wink. “You are so encouraging today. I’ll give you a special present later for your support my first and most important love.”
As Rarity trotted off she could swear she heard Applejack whisper something uncouth while staring at that couch. A soon to be princess needed to learn better manners, and Rarity might just have to wash that mare’s mouth out later. Of course, she wasn’t going to use soap.
Walking down the halls it occurred to her that this castle really did get quiet when one was alone. She was able to catch glimpses of the guards or the servants, enough to know if she ever needed one she could call and they’d be right there, but also enough to know that they would avoid making their presence too known so she could feel like she had privacy. Being royalty was going to be a real change to her life.
At long last she found the velvet door. The material and color of the door just oozed with dark romantic potential. How Luna had gone so long without being married was beyond her. It wouldn’t be too much longer now though. Rarity opened the door and snuck in.
She saw Luna, or at least Luna’s shape under the blanket lying on the bed. Oh a sleeping encounter would be so lovely. To think Luna might open her eyes, see Rarity by her side and realize there was a beautiful mare just waiting for her to do whatever she pleased with. Yes, this plan had zero chance of failing.
Rarity closed the door as quietly as possible and made her way over to the bed. It was almost pitch black in here without the light. For some reason if Luna had any windows they were magically enchanted to block any and all daylight. Still she felt her way towards the bed and climbed onto it.
Slipping underneath the blankets Rarity reached out. Her hooves gently stroked Luna’s tender soft hoof. She ran her hoof up that long leg and then down her side until she felt that lovely skinny flank. Giving it a squeeze she heard a small gasp and a pleasured moan. Rarity could guess well enough where the face was and moved forward to meet a pair of inviting lips.
Luna didn’t fight her, instead welcomed her in. Rarity pushed forward, kisses were shared. Tongues played with each other. Hooves reached for and grabbed all sorts of places that brought all manner of delightful sounds from both parties. Rarity realized there was one more place that would set Luna off and create the best experience. Luna’s horn.
Rarity reached up, her tongue drawing a line across the soft hair. The taste of honey from Luna’s mouth still fresh in her mind. She expected to find a horn to wrap her hungry mouth around and found more hair. This was strange. Rarity reached up with a hoof and looked further. With no light it was surprisingly hard to find the horn.
Fluttershy’s voice eeped. “L-Luna, that’s my head, um d-don’t you want to l-lick somewhere else?”
Rarity swallowed. “Fluttershy? Is that you?”
Fluttershy froze in Rarity’s grip. Her hoof was still stuck on somewhere quite private. After a moment the hoof began to move and she tried to lower her voice. “It is I, Luna, princess of night and stuff.”
Rarity didn’t exactly push Fluttershy’s hoof away but her plan was indeed foiled by this revelation. She found Fluttershy instead of Luna… and she found Fluttershy in Luna’s bed… Rarity sat up, rolled over and jumped out of bed. Fluttershy reached out in the darkness. “W-wait, R-rarity I wasn’t d-done.”
“Darling, I am sure you are more than capable of finishing yourself.” She left out of the door and closed it behind her with less care than she had entered.
One look in a nearby mirror revealed her lipstick was now smeared and it had been wasted on Fluttershy. The worst part was that she was now very much in the mood, and wanting to just go back and finish herself with Fluttershy. Of course she did not as she was saving her pent up energy for something far greater than Fluttershy. Luna was her target, and even if she was going to be the last one to bed her, she was going to do it.
Now stalking through the castle and attempting to clean her face up using magic she felt like such a fool. Of course Fluttershy was in Luna’s bed. The mare wanted to be a pet and found a pony who would willingly give her that. Rarity on the other hoof was destined to be a princess and so she was going to be a bit more dignified than merely lying in some pony’s bed waiting for them to come to her when they had time. No, they would make time for Rarity. Princess or no Princess, Rarity deserved that much.
It was a little while before Rarity found somepony else, and it wasn’t exactly who she expected. It was Twilight. The mare was just about to enter the restroom and Rarity hatched a decisive plan the moment she saw her. Following closely behind Rarity slipped into the restroom before Twilight even noticed.
In fact, Twilight didn’t seem to notice her at all and was walking to the toilet. For a moment Rarity waited to see if the mare would notice her. It wasn’t like they hadn’t seen each other in compromising positions before but this felt odd as Twilight was a little out of it. Once Twilight was upon her porcelain throne and the water works were turned on she looked over and saw Rarity.
Her eyes widened for a moment and then lowered. “Oh, hi…”
Rarity shrugged. She’d seen the mare pee before, it just something that happened when you were such close friends. Rarity actually took the time to look in the mirror and realize some of her eye shadow was a mess too. “Hello, Darling.”
“So… there are like ten bathrooms here you know.”
Rarity giggled. “Of course I know darling.”
“So, why are you in the one I’m in? Or wait… am I in the one you’re in?”
Rarity rolled her eyes. “Does it matter?”
“I guess not. Just feels weird now that I know that some ponies like pee… way too much.”
Rarity glanced at her. “Sounds like somepony wants some apple cider.”
Twilight looked at her. “What does that mean?”
“Oh nothing, it’s not important. Just old jokes that you may have missed out on.”
Twilight groaned. “Today is a mess. I think Rainbow Dash hates me.”
“Oh how come?”
“I got kinda weird with her and she kicked me in the face.”
Rarity gasped. “She did not.”
“I might have deserved it a little.”
“Of course you didn’t. Even if you do get weird sometimes, it’s not like you were trying to do anything too weird with her?”
Twilight looked at Rarity with a deadpan expression. “I think I wanted to have sex with her.”
“Oh… well… she does get rather uncomfortable with touching. Still I don’t think you deserved kicked, unless you like that kind of thing.”
Twilight groaned. “No, that’s just… that’s super weird.”
“So are pee fetishes but you don’t see me complaining when Applejack gets in a mood.”
Twilight looked at her eyes widening. “No.”
Rarity smiled. “Oh we’ve all tried something weird at least once right?”
“Not me.”
“Everypony that isn’t a virgin.”
Twilight groaned. “I don’t want to hear it.”
Rarity laughed. She was done looking at herself in the mirror. Instead, she was ready to move onto her real plan. She walked over to where Twilight was. The mare’s eyes widened increasingly as she approached. Rarity licked her lips. “Twilight, be a dear won’t you?”
Twilight closed her legs tight. “NO! you are not drinking that.”
Rarity rolled her eyes. “Not my fetish.” Rarity leaned over and pressed her lips against Twilight’s. Just a quick kiss, nothing more. Of course she felt Twilight kiss back. Clearly her previous hesitation faded pretty quickly. Once Rarity pulled away she saw a dazed look in Twilight’s eyes. “Where is Luna?”
Twilight swallowed. “Um… Luna… I don’t know.”
“Didn’t you have an audience with her earlier?”
Twilight shrugged. “It’s getting closer to dinner. If she’s awake she probably found some cake somewhere.”
Rarity smiled and trotted to the exit. “Thank you, Twilight. I will make sure to reward you later, my future wife.”
Twilight just stared at her as Rarity left. Finally somepony checked out her butt. She heard Twilight saying something as she trotted down the hall but ignored it. Something about bathroom doors and shutting them. Nothing important she was sure.
Moving on Rarity made her way to the kitchens where she was happy to see a dark, tall, and beautiful princess eating a cake. Rarity walked in and snuggled up to her side. “My love! I’ve been looking for you all day.”
Luna swallowed and looked down at her. “Oh, Rarity, how joyous thou should join us. Care for some cake?”
Rarity reached up and gently wiped some of the icing off of Luna’s cheek. “Well, only if I get to eat it off of you.”
Luna smiled. “That is almost exactly what Pinkie said.”
Rarity rolled her eyes, “Who cares what Pinkie says when it’s just the two of us.”
Luna blinked. “I thought there were three of us?”
Pinkie Pie added in. “I did too.”
Rarity looked over and growled. “Pinkie, leave!” She then realized something that she really wished she hadn’t. There was a pink icing cake on the table. Pinkie Pie was right behind it, and her legs spread around it as if she was trying to hold it. Where Luna was eating, and very messily Rarity might add, was leading straight to the center of what was between Pinkie’s legs.
Pinkie pie giggled. “If I move the cake will be ruined.”
Luna nodded. “And ruining a princess’s cake is outlawed.”
Rarity could feel the mental gears in her mind breaking. One by one she was losing control of the situation. Pinkie was already this far in her plans. Luna had to know where that cake was leading and perfectly fine with it… oh no.
Luna swallowed and then blinked a few times. “Oh, Pinkie. I’m so sorry, I just realized something I had forgotten. Please forgive me as I must cut this short. I swear it on my honor that I shall continue this with you later. For now, I must ask some very important questions to the captain of the guard.”
Luna’s horn lit up and she vanished.
Pinkie Pie groaned. “That is the second time somepony interrupted my chance to get laid!”
Rarity growled. “Join the party… actually better yet. Clean yourself up and join Fluttershy in Luna’s bed. I’m sure she’ll be happy to go to sleep with two of you around.”
Pinkie Pie jumped up into the air and her tongue lashed out around herself like some kind of impossibly long tentacle, letting her eat every bit of cake that was on her body. Then she proceeded to let her jaw descend like a cave and swallow the rest of the cake whole. “YUM!” she jumped off the table and began trotting to what Rarity was assuming was Luna’s room.
“I’m never going to get kissed by a princess…”
Pinkie Pie stopped just outside of the kitchen to look back at and smile. “Why not? Everypony else has.” She trotted away leaving that one remark to stick in Rarity’s heart like a barbed thorn.
Rarity sat down and laid her head face first on the counter. Even realizing this where Pinkie Pie was previously sitting she didn’t care. So far her plans were horrible. No princess wanted to be with her. No matter how hard she tried. And she was trying really, really hard.
“Why don’t any of the Princesses want to kiss me? Am I truly that mundane?”
“Of course you’re not mundane, Rarity.”
She looked over to see Princess Celestia walk in. Her smile was as warm as ever as she stared down at Rarity. “You’re beautiful and wonderful.”
“Then why won’t either of you kiss me?”
Celestia walked over and lowered a wing around Rarity’s back. “Shh.”
“No, it’s not fair. Twilight gets kisses. Rainbow Dash gets kisses. Fluttershy, and apparently even Applejack do. How come I am the only one who doesn’t get any of the same attention?”
Celestia’s wing gently lifted up Rarity’s chin. “Is that all you want? A simple kiss?”
“Well I’d also accept hot sticky princess sex, but a kiss would make me feel better.”
Celestia smiled, leaned her head down and pressed her lips against Rarity’s. The kiss lasted for longer than she expected. No tongue but it was something. More than that Celestia was hot, like physically burning hot. Rarity’s entire face was melting into that one simple kiss. Rarity had to pull away and breathe, her face was flushed red and she felt a bit too hot for her own liking. Even so, it was amazing. If that’s what a simple kiss from Celestia felt like… oh by the stars she couldn’t even imagine how great intimacy would be.
Celestia smiled and looked away as she made her way to the fridge. “I know I had some cake in here, I’ll share it with you. Pink icing is always the best when you’re feeling down.”
Pink Icing… “Um… Luna was eating that when I got here.”
Celestia’s body went rigid. “She… ate it.”
Rarity did not dare to say Pinkie Pie helped. “Yes…”
Celestia smiled. “And she skedaddled before I got here did she not?”
“Um… yes.”
Celestia grinned. And her eyes began to glow. “Oh, I see. Well we can’t have that now can we? I should find her immediately and let her know whose cake it was she was eating.”
With a golden flash of light Celestia vanished leaving Rarity sitting there staring after the princess. Her heart was beating a thousand miles a minute. Her body hot and tense. Celestia was certainly powerful and somehow even sexier when angry…
It was growing closer to dinner time, or at least that’s how Fluttershy’s belly felt when she woke up with a sleeping princess next to her. Her head was still spinning from the past day or two. So many things had changed in such a short time frame. It wasn’t the first time she’d been intimate with a mare, but it was the first time she felt really and truly attractive. Luna’s interest in her was so sincere that she couldn’t help but to fall in love with the princess of the night.
Sure it was dark and scary in here but with Luna’s wing draped over her back, pulling her closely into an embrace she was warm and felt safe. There was one more thing she noticed after some time of getting used to the darkness. Even in the dark of this room, Luna’s mane sparkled. She could look up and see the stars above her, reach out and actually touch them.
It was magic, pure and simple.
Rolling over she nuzzled into Luna’s chest. She was lucky that after Rarity’s interruption earlier she had been onguard for anypony else coming to interrupt her. Pinkie had come in after that, the less she thought about that the better. Luna was her princess and she was not too keen on sharing just yet.
Luna’s voice came out gentle and soft. “Mmm Fluttershy, did you awaken?”
Fluttershy nodded. “Y-yes.”
“I do hope you slept soundly.”
Fluttershy kissed Luna’s chest. “I’ve never had dreams as good as the ones I have when I’m with you.”
Luna’s feathers trailed a hot line down Fluttershy’s back ending just above her flank. “I would hope so.”
“So, um, our um, conversation from earlier… you had a pet manticore?”
Luna snuggled closer squeezing Fluttershy. “Oh my yes. His name was Spot, he had a spot just over his right eye. The most fantastic and magical of beasts, it still pains me so to know I put a manticore in harm’s way to try and stop you and your friends when I had been evil.”
Fluttershy nuzzled some more. Luna smelled really good. A little like flowers mixed in with something aetherial, something she couldn’t quite place. “I know the feeling. My first gala here… I wasn’t very nice to the animals.”
Luna squeezed a little more than relaxed as if trying to hug her while already hugging her. “I know, the poor dears were so frightened I had to spend hours coaxing them back to sleep. I promised them you weren’t scary or mean, you just wanted some affection.”
Fluttershy looked up to where Luna’s face would be if she could see any better. Their lips brushed by accident, but Fluttershy didn’t mind. “You talk to the animals?”
“Well of course I do. The dreams of all creatures in Equestria are my domain.” Luna laughed. “Besides, why do you think we even have animals in the garden?”
Fluttershy nuzzled her nose against Luna’s. “Because Celestia likes them?”
“Of course she enjoys looking at them from time to time, but the animals are my friends.” Luna giggled. “The reason they are there is for me, not for her.”
Fluttershy pressed forward letting their lips meet once more before pulling away. “I knew you were the best.” Realizing what she had just said she felt her ears folding back. “P-please don’t tell Celestia.”
Luna rubbed her face into Fluttershy’s neck. “Oh do not worry little one, I think I’ll keep that, and maybe a few other things to myself.”
The kisses Luna began planting alongside Fluttershy’s neck were so pleasant. She wanted to stay there in the darkness of Luna’s embrace forever. Of course that was when her stomach began to rumble. Luna paused, then laughed and pulled away. “let us fetch some food before continuing any physically straining activities.”
Fluttershy didn’t want to leave but she was getting pretty hungry. “O-okay.”
Without any ability to see, Fluttershy was left relying on Luna to lift her up onto the mare’s back and then walked to the door. Once the door opened bright glaring light poured in from the hall. Fluttershy felt herself hissing at the light; it was far too bright. It only occurred to her that hissing was a rather unladylike thing to do. She quickly apologized only for Luna to laugh it off and they continued down the hall together.
Luna did not take them straight to the food. Instead taking them to somewhere different altogether. A place they both sorely needed as well. The baths.
There were probably as many baths as there were bathrooms in the castle. Some of them hidden behind secret doors as Fluttershy discovered earlier. This time they were led to a large open one. The floor had two striking colors of tiles. One a deep shade of blue covering one half of the room, the other was a shade of orange. They met in the middle around a massive bath that was far more like a heated pool than anything else. Towels lined the racks on the wall, far too many for even the princesses to ever use them all.
Luna walked them into the tub where Fluttershy realized with a start that the water went at least four feet deep. If she dunked in she might not be able to stick her head out. Luckily even with Luna laying down, she was able to keep her head above the water’s edge from Luna’s additional height.
The water was nice, hot, and steamy. If she wasn’t so hungry, Fluttershy might be risking some other activities with her princess right then. Luckily the only pony so far to get close to catching anything she had done with Luna was Rarity. Speaking of which, Fluttershy wasn’t sure what to make of Rarity’s actions. She both wanted to continue seeing where that would lead, and felt bad about it because Rarity thought she was kissing Luna.
Of course that brought with it another concern. She did not want to share Luna. At least, she kept telling herself it was only a temporary thing. That she would get used to the idea later, after the marriage, but for now she just wanted to keep Luna all to herself and soak in all the love the mare had, returning it with every fiber of her being. Anything she could do for Luna, she would.
It was almost like she was getting to live out a fantasy of hers. One that Luna was privy to, and didn’t judge her for. Looking over she noticed a small box lying nearby the bath’s edge. It was wrapped up in pink and yellow wallpaper. There was a red ribbon tied on the top of it.
Luna noticed what she was staring at and said, “Oh my, whatever could that be?”
Luna got up and as the water fell down around them she made her way with careful strides toward the box. She lay down as close as she could to the edge and nodded for Fluttershy to take a look at the box. “Fluttershy, is that your name on it?”
Fluttershy went over and saw the name tag on it. “For Fluttershy, from one of your true loves.”
Fluttershy only had one true love, Celestia had not quite shown the same level of interest and after so much time with Luna, did Fluttershy really want her too? Maybe, it would be nice to be favored by another princess, but if she did that she’d have to be more open to their desires to share, and that was something she didn’t feel comfortable with yet.
Fluttershy unwrapped the package with wet hooves watching the giftwrap turn to mush. Inside was a box that was relatively unharmed by soaking wet hooves. Opening it up she saw a pink collar inside. On it was the name, Princess Fluttershy.
She looked over at Luna and blinked.
Luna frowned. “This is… something thou desired yes? Did thou not dream of a collar?”
Fluttershy smiled and put the collar on her neck. It fit perfectly. Loose and gentle yet just tight enough it wouldn’t fall off or get snagged by accident. “I… is this okay?”
Luna smiled. “If it is your desire then anything is okay.”
Fluttershy had to blink some of the tears out of her eyes. “I can be your wife, and your pet?”
Luna leaned over and gave Fluttershy a kiss on the cheek. “Of course, I love you.”
Fluttershy wrapped her forelegs around Luna’s neck embracing her. “I love you too.”
The rest of the bath went without much excitement but she couldn’t help imagining just how badly she wanted to continue being Luna’s pet. For years she’d had dreams about being a pet, and although Luna misunderstood them at first thinking Fluttershy wanted to be treated like a queen, once that was cleared up Luna held no judgment for her, only comfort, understanding, and acceptance.
There was no princess better than Luna.
After the bath they made their way toward the dining hall. Fur nice, clean, and fluffy after drying off, they had no fear of anything. They made their way to the dining hall but just outside of it Fluttershy and Luna encountered Rarity and Applejack. Luna smiled at them.
Rarity looked up at her. “Luna, my love, could me and Applejack speak with Fluttershy in private for a moment?”
Fluttershy could tell by the look in Rarity’s eyes, something was wrong and she quickly said. “It’s okay. I-I’ll catch up.”
She was plucked off of Luna’s back and set down onto the floor. For a moment there was silence as Luna went inside and closed the doors behind them. Fluttershy felt cold without the warm loving fur of her mistress to cuddle into.
Rarity looked down at her hooves. "Darling, about earlier… I’m sorry I didn’t help you… finish your task."
Applejack nearly shoved Rarity. “That’s not the part yer supposed to apologize fer. You and Fluttershy just made a mistake is all.”
Fluttershy looked away. "N-no, Applejack, it wasn’t a mistake... I’m sorry I pretended to be Luna… I knew the moment you got in bed it was you, I just… “
Rarity gasped. “How did you know it was me?”
“When Luna crawls into your bed, you know it’s her. Besides you taste and smell like marshmallows… it's good."
Rarity bit her lower lip. "And I suppose I just wanted attention from some pony and I neglected you… and what do you mean I smell like marshmallows? I am not a marshmallow."
"Nevermind that um… and I’m ok now."
"Did pinkie help at least?"
Fluttershy nearly spat, the second interruption came from Pinkie just as she was about to finish. That only made things so much harder. "You mean you’re the one who sent her into my room?"
"Luna’s room," Rarity corrected. "And I know from experience that she's wonderful at helping that itch. I do hope she was good enough for you."
Fluttershy decided to not look a gift horse in the mouth… for all of five seconds. "You know what, no, she wasn’t good enough for me."
Rarity’s ears folded back with an expression of real horror. "I’m so sorry I thought.., how, how can I make this up to you?"
Fluttershy looked away. "You just left me there, alone. You can’t do that."
"Oh no, Fluttershy, please, I’m marrying you too. Let me do something, anything to make it up to you. I’m such an awful pony."
Fluttershy did her best to suppress a cruel smile. Something felt wrong about this, like she was going to do something bad, but she didn’t care anymore. She was Luna’s pet and deserved to be treated well.
"I’m still in the mood for marshmallows. Perhaps for a…um… desert?"
Rarity looked down. "I… ok. I‘ll ask AJ but… okay, I’ll finish what I started, after dinner, ok, love?" She grumbled to herself, “Who else do I need to make up to?”
Applejack whispered, “Pretty much everypony, oh and permission granted sugarcube. Ah want to see where this goes.”
Fluttershy and the others went inside and took their seats. Walking in almost everypony was already here and in different seats. Fluttershy of course took the seat next to Luna and as Luna wrapped a loving wing over her back, a few of the others gave them odd looks.
Once fully seated Fluttershy stroked a hoof over her new collar. "Okay"
It took a few moments but eventually, Rarity, sitting at Celestia’s side asked, “Fluttershy, why do you have a collar around your neck?”
Luna pulled Fluttershy in closer. “Because she has requested one. For my brides, I will give anything I have in my power to give.”
Fluttershy nuzzled up next to Luna. “She’s so loving.”
Applejack cleared her throat. “You two getting mighty close ain’t ya?”
The wing stretched out and stroked Applejack’s cheek. She was on the other side of Luna tonight. “Oh my dear, Applejack. I can be as close to any of my brides as thee desires.”
Applejack’s cheeks turned pink but she didn’t pull away from the touch. Rarity shot a glare at Applejack and then nuzzled into Princess Celestia’s side drawing a quick gasp from the much larger mare. “I’m sure any of our beautiful wives would do the same.”
Celestia smiled awkwardly as she set a wing over Rarity’s back pulling her close. On Celestia’s other side Rainbow Dash was there. She pouted and looked away. “I’m too cool for the mushy stuff you know.” She glanced at Celestia a couple of times as if expecting something. When nothing happened she let out a quiet sigh of defeat.
Pinkie Pie was between Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash. “I just want the best of both worlds!”
There may have been a lot of food on the table. Yet nopony was eating just yet. There was one other that hadn’t shown up. Celestia would glance toward the doors every once in a while as if looking forward to the venerable mare’s appearance. When none came she looked down at her empty plate. “Well, I suppose we shouldn’t starve ourselves waiting.”
Luna chimed in. “Dear sister, tis fine. We both know our Twilight loves her studies. Perhaps she found a good book and lost track of the time.”
Celestia smiled at that. “She does get lost in reading…” her eyes looked a little bit dreamy as she sat there. Fluttershy wasn’t a stranger to dreamy looks. Perhaps Celestia had some attraction to the idea of studious ponies.
The doors opened just then and the mare of the hour came walking in. her mane was a mess, her fur stuck out on end, and her eyes looked glazed over. She made her way to the seat where Rainbow dash was and tried to sit down before getting a swift kick revealing a pony was already in the seat. Twilight looked back to see Rainbow Dash glaring at her. Twilight looked around and eyes wide as she realized all the seats next to Celestia were taken. She looked at Rainbow Dash and growled.
After that, she made her way to the other seat available, between Rarity and Applejack. “Good evening girls.”
Rainbow Dash folded her legs over her chest. “I got your gift.”
Twilight smiled. “Oh and how did you like it.”
“Made for some good throwing practice. Did you know you could hit ponies from the balcony with a well-timed toss.”
Celestia’s eyes widened. “Were you the one throwing pies at ponies?”
Rainbow Dash grinned. “Maybe.”
Luna tried to stifle a laugh, gave up and just laughed harder. Celestia cracked a smile and spoke very carefully. “That is not, very appropriate behavior from a future princess.”
Rainbow Dash shrugged. “They seemed fine with it. Got some food and a new hat.”
Fluttershy imagined ponies running around the castle with tinfoil pie hats covered in crumbs and pie goo. She had to cover her mouth with her hooves to avoid laughing out loud. Celestia giggled a little at the idea as well. Rarity rolled her eyes. “Really now, Rainbow Dash, we’re already in a weird position here, please try not to make us look worse.”
Rainbow Dash shrugged. “Better than what Twilight’s been doing all day.”
Twilight blinked. “W-what? I didn’t do that all day. I didn’t even do that most of the day. Or even once. It was you. You did that.”
Rainbow Dash leaned forward. “Do what exactly?”
Twilight’s cheeks were turning pink. “Nothing. Absolutely nothing.”
Fluttershy felt she was missing some context here but at least they were still being playful. It was then she realized that Applejack had snuck in closer to Luna when she wasn’t looking. Luna’s other wing was draped across Applejack’s back now. Fluttershy leaned over and stuck her face next to Applejacks. Applejack looked over and saw her. “Fluttershy, you okay, yer eyes look a mite red?”
Fluttershy hissed, then remembered for the second time that evening, ponies don’t hiss. “I am fine. Me and Luna are fine. Me and Luna.”
Applejack rolled her eyes, took her hat off and shoved it on top of Fluttershy’s head covering her eyes. Fluttershy darted back and began trying to push the hat off. It was stuck pretty good. Applejack laughed. “Don’t be greedy now, Shy. There’s six of us that they’re marrying.”
Once Fluttershy got the hat off her head she shook her head furiously like a wet dog. “I am not being selfish.”
Luna brought Fluttershy in a bit closer. “Do not worry my loves. I have enough heart for all six of my lovely brides.”
Meanwhile Fluttershy noticed that Twilight was glowering at Rarity who was still snuggling up to Princess Celestia. Food had appeared on most ponies’ plates by now. Even Fluttershy’s was filled. She was too hungry to keep arguing so she got busy eating some steamed asparagus. She’d let Applejack have her snuggles, at least for now. Later she would find a way to defeat the mare… oh that sounded aggressive… perhaps, just help her lose interest in Luna. Celestia was just fine and open, why take her Luna when Applejack could have Celestia.
As the dinner wore on Fluttershy noticed something odd about Rainbow Dash, she had been scooting closer and closer to Celestia. She was now only a few inches away from her. The look in her eyes made her look more like a lost puppy than a pony. What was Rainbow Dash wanting?
Celestia noticed and reached down with a wing wrapping Rainbow Dash into an embrace. Twilight actually growled. It seemed Twilight understood the need to keep a princess to themselves. Rainbow Dash said, “I guess I can’t do anything if you want to hug me so bad.” She nuzzled into Celestia’s side. “I guess I’m just too cool.”
Celestia smiled. “You are pretty cool.”
Rarity looked up from under Celestia’s other wing. “What about me?”
Celestia smiled. “You are very pretty.”
Rarity squeed and wrapped her legs around Celestia’s waist. “YES!”
Applejack rolled her eyes. “Everypony needing Princess affection now huh. Guess we’re beyond the point of no return.”
Luna smiled. “That is good.”
Pinkie Pie laughed at the site. “Awww, wittle Wainbow needs cuddly wuddlys.”
Rainbow Dash stuck her tongue out at the mare.
As the dinner wore on, despite Fluttershy being well-fed she felt something was wrong. As ponies began to depart, she managed to pry herself away from Luna saying she was going to take a quick walk and be back when she was done. She really hoped Pinkie didn’t strike in that time.
What Fluttershy really did was trot around until she found Twilight. The mare was following Celestia, and at least a good few meters behind the mare. Nopony else was with Celestia so clearly it was going to be Twilight’s time to get some of her own love. Of course Fluttershy caught her just in time and whispered. “Twilight.”
Twilight nearly jumped, turned back and stared at Fluttershy. “F-Fluttershy, where did you come from?”
Fluttershy shook her head. “We need to talk.”
“I know, I know… I shouldn’t be mad at Rainbow Dash and Rarity. They both want to love their future wives as much as I do, its wrong to be self-“
“No, we need to keep them away from our lovers.”
Twilight blinked. “Wait… what?”
Fluttershy feared there wasn’t much time before Pinkie found an opportunity. “You need to keep them away from Celestia, and I need to keep them away from my Luna. We should work together.”
Twilight stared at her. A cruel smile growing across her lips. “Oh, I see… okay. Team Twishy then?”
“Team Twishy.”
Twilight glanced back at Celestia. “I’m going to bed soon, but I’ll start off by keeping Pinkie Pie busy.”
“H-how so?”
Twilight cleared her throat. “Oh man, I heard it was guard pony six hundred and seventy two’s birthday today. And no pony had a party or a cake for him. Whatever will he do?”
Pinkie’s head popped out of a nearby lamp gasping. “NO! Nopony should have their B-day uncelebrated.” She slunk back into the lamp and vanished.
Twilight smiled. “I will give you a list of every single guards birthday for tomorrow. Use it wisely.”
Fluttershy stared at the lamp. “Um… but… how did she…”
Twilight blinked. “How did she do what?”
Fluttershy shook her head. “Nevermind. I’m um… I’m going back to bed.” What she didn’t say was that she was going to take a detour to have some marshmallow pie for dessert, and perhaps apple pie too if that was still on the menu. “G-good night, Twilight.”
Twilight smiled. “Good night, Fluttershy.” As Twilight turned to leave, there was a sharp laugh from her. She stopped and looked back at Fluttershy with narrowed eyes. Something seemed suddenly dangerous about her. “By the way, I’m also going to be taking my share of Luna. But you make an adorable pet, so I think we’ll keep you.”
Fluttershy looked back to complain about that being unfair but Twilight was already gone in a flash of red light. Well… take care of the nosy ponies first, then Twilight. After all Twilight would be easy to deal with, Fluttershy heard that Twilight had some disagreements with quesadillas before.
Of course, she could worry about her perfectly innocent plans later, for now, it was marshmallow time.
If only Luna could stay by her soft buttercup’s side all night long. Sadly even with marriage only two days away she still had duties to attend to. Leaving the sleeping form of her lover behind she made her way out into the castle’s halls. It was late into the evening and she could sense that mostly everypony was already asleep. Their dreams creating a tingle in the air, one she could easily interact with to create nightmares if she so desired or dreams of pure pleasure and ecstasy. She had an idea based on the events from earlier that evening. Even she couldn’t help but to notice how the brides were already starting to get jealous of one another. She knew this was a possibility but to think it happened so soon. This could be a problem.
A few well placed dreams could help out very much with these negative feelings and she had an idea of just such a dream. Of course that was going to have to wait as she sensed one pony was awake, one very important pony. Walking through the halls she could almost feel their eyes on her from every twist and turn. It would be fine if she didn’t also feel hostile intent from them. If only she had realized that her earlier actions as fun and passionate as they were, would only end up causing this problem.
She rounded a hall and stopped as the pristine white fur and flowing mane stood to block her path. A cruel smile lay upon Celestia’s lips. Before Celestia could speak a servant walked past and nearly whispered. “Two Hundred and Twelve.”
Celestia’s smile only grew wider. “Dear sister, how have you been?”
Luna didn’t’ have time to think of what the strange number had meant. “I am quite fine.”
“Are you okay? Hungry perhaps?”
“We are alicorns, dear sister. We are both always hungry and not always for food.”
Celestia didn’t take the bait. “Perhaps I could offer you some cake. I had this wonderful pink icing strawberry cake. If you wish we could share it.”
Luna swallowed. “Tis fine, I should be off on my duty today.”
Luna tried to walk past but found herself meeting a golden energy wall. “Please, Luna, if I am allowed to rest on my duties then I feel you should be allowed to as well.”
Luna looked over at her, the cold look in her eyes and the cruel smile both things to fear. “What is it that thou could want from me?”
Celestia’s smile grew. “Why dear sister, whatever could you mean?”
“Thou already knows that I ate the cake. What else would this be for?”
Celestia leaned over, their muzzles nearly touching from the close proximity. “Oh, you did? But it was a special cake for rainy days, and poor Rarity had such a rainy day today.”
Luna swallowed. “But why, she is so beautiful, she should not have any days with any amount of liquid falling from the skies.”
Celestia pulled away and made a grand gesture with her wing. “That is what I said. Of course now she is sad, and I fear without my special cake I could not cheer her up.”
Luna nodded. “I shall go to her quarters immediately to help. I feel she must be awake as her dreams have not yet begun.”
Celestia looked sideways. “She is not there. I have checked. I do know where she is though.”
“Where is she? I must go to her rescue immediately, no bride of mine shall be left wanting.”
Celestia looked toward the rear of the castle. “She is in the pond outside of the castle. Enjoying a late night swim, but her heart still aches. With me being unable to please her, perhaps you could.”
Luna’s horn lit up. “I will do so immediately.”
With a teleport Luna found herself in the courtyard and at the pond. The hedges were tall, taller than Luna even. A few statues of ponies stood about. The pond itself was fairly large, filled with a few large tropical fish and clean see through the water. Yet Rarity was nowhere in sight. Strange, did she leave already?
A rumbling sound was heard behind Luna. Along with a croak so loud it was almost painful to her ears. Turning around Luna saw the origin of the sound. It was a frog, but one made entirely from cake and frosting. Its eyes like two large cherries stared right down at Luna. Its mouth opened and a tongue of icing lashed out wrapping around her and dragging her into its mouth. Luna cried out as she was swallowed whole by the frosted monstrosity.
***
Celestia watched from her balcony as Luna was swallowed by the cake frog monster. In her telekinetic aura she held both a drink and a bucket of popcorn. She sipped at her drink and smiled. “This was a fantastic idea.”
Spike grabbed a clawful of popcorn and ate it. “Wasn’t my idea, but hey, I’ll watch any crap show. I’m hoping she loses it like Twilight.”
Celestia laughed. “Oh, if only we were so lucky. She will find the escape soon enough. Her embarrassment will be known for ages. Nopony eats my cake and gets away with it.”
Spike nodded. “That’s exactly why I only eat cake when it’s offered. Too scary otherwise.”
“That is good thinking. At least, better than my sisters.”
The two of them laughed and continued eating popcorn while they waited for Luna’s exit. Once she figured out what she was going to have to do to escape that was. Celestia couldn’t wait.
***
It took Luna nearly twenty minutes of struggling in the bowels of the cake fiend. The insides were magically enchanted so she couldn’t even eat her way out and she tried. Instead she had to climb through a winding tunnel and through a thick collection of melted chocolate fudge. Once she reached the end of the tunnel she crawled her way out, and with a push from the cake monster she came out along with what had to be ten gallons of melted fudge.
Sitting in the moonlight covered in the brown sweet chocolate sludge she looked over to realize what side she had crawled out of. Being excreted by the rear end of a giant cake monster was perhaps the most embarrassing thing that’s ever happened to her. Even that one time got violently ill in the throne room was nothing compared to the humiliation she now felt.
The cake frog for its part fell over and melted before her eyes, perhaps the strain was too much. Of course realizing now what she must have looked like, even she could not be goaded into eating the fudge. Instead she needed a cleansing bath, one with the hottest of waters and perhaps holy herbs to cleanse not just her mind and body but her spirit as well as she had been defiled beyond measure by that confectionary construct.
Celestia had certainly gotten her back for the cake theft and then some. Of course by going so far, all Celestia did was guarantee a war. A war of pranks the likes of which had not been seen in over one thousand years was about to commence. Hopefully their mutual weddings would survive in the process.
Luna attempted to stand, the sludge beneath her slipped and slid as she fell face first back into the pile of chocolate. Just chocolate. The taste on her mouth was chocolate. The smell was chocolate. If she kept thinking of it only as chocolate she would not freak out.
Her horn flared and she teleported. Straight into the largest bath in the castle. Screw walking, her dignity had already been soiled, what else could go wrong?
The howling laughter from up in the balconies of the castle were not lost on her either.
***
The howls of laughter coming both Celestia and Spike were perhaps uncalled for, but they were at least genuine. Celestia couldn’t remember the last time she had laughed so hard. The entire room was growing warm as a result and her body might have begun to glow as golden tears of joy ran down her face. Spike laughed so hard he began to hiccup burst of green fire.
All in all tonight was very successful. If Luna was going to force her into a marriage such as this, the least she could do was get some payback and even if Luna retaliated, perhaps the retaliation would be enough to cancel the whole affair. That or the ponies who were forming unknown battle lines were going to do that. Either way Celestia could feel herself only a few steps from victory but she had to be careful. In the end it had to be Luna’s decision to stop the marriages. That way Celestia could play the role of the supportive elder sister and act as though she was only going along with it for Luna’s sake.
One thing she hadn’t counted on with her joyous laughter was that she and Spike were not quite alone in this room. Twilight rolled over, got out of bed and marched up to them, her hooves making stomping sounds with every step. She smiled at them as Celestia and Spike both attempted to stifle their laughter.
“Princess, Spike, I love you both very much you know, but it is the middle of the night, and you two are just a teensy, weensy bit loud. Could you two please keep it down a little?”
Celestia tried to choke back her laughter. “Ok-kay.”
Twilight smiled and looked over the balcony edge at the courtyard below. Her eyes widened. “Holy! What crapped all over the courtyard? Did a dragon do a fly by pooping? And why is there a pony imprint in it?”
That was it, Celestia and Spike burst into an avalanche of uncontrolled laughter. Poor Twilight would forever remain none the wiser about this. Her shock and horror only grew as the laughter continued. She must have thought them mad. Celestia only laughed harder as Twilight tried to ask questions. Eventually she gave up and went back to bed. Activating a silence bubble around her to make sure they would not keep her up later than she already was.
***
Having had a nice hot bath and washing all of the just chocolate out of her everything, Luna was refreshed and ready to tackle this subject in a most dignified and mature way. In fact she was busy scrounging around the kitchen looking for just the right tools for the trade. Something had to be here to help her in this.
Celestia was so clever, so clever indeed. The cake frog she had created, actually took most of the cake supply left in the castle. So even if she wanted a late night snack she’d be hard pressed to find it. Still she knew her sister better than anypony else. There was no way she’d leave the castle void of cake, not in a thousand years of her rulership had that happened even once.
In fact they had an entire cake room. Staring at it, the place was the most empty of delicious sugary cake, but there were still a few good cakes remaining in stasis, ready to be freshly eaten at a moment’s notice. What she was about to do was going to hurt, even Luna hated to think of this. Still she realized more than anypony that sacrifices had to be made in a war of pranks.
At the very least she could say she was doing something good here. These cakes were all so sugary and fattening. How would she or Celestia fit into their wedding dresses if she did not in fact take their health seriously? A cold blue light enveloped her horn. For the good of Equestria, of their waistline, and of the prank war, she would make sure they all ate healthy…
Another morning and this time Celestia woke up to the sensation of something hitting her butt. For a moment she wondered what it was and realized with stark horror that Twilight was sleeping next to her. Somehow Celestia had become the little spoon during the night, and now Twilight was taking full advantage of that to hump her.
A million thoughts ran through Celestia’s head, anything from scolding Twilight to rolling over and just taking her then and there. She could also opt to completely ignore it. The last one had some appeal, let the mare finish her thing and never speak of it again. When after several minutes she began to realize the way Twilight was trying to hump her would result in neither party being able to enjoy themselves she dared a glance back over at Twilight. The mare had her eyes closed and was biting her lip. Her body was moving on its own. She was asleep.
Well at least it made Celestia’s choice easy. She simply got out of bed only to see Twilight continue moving in her sleep. It was likely the reason for this dream was due to a certain Princess of the Night. Celestia figured Luna would get her back for the cake monster last night, at least this prank wasn’t too bad.
Going to her balcony Celestia managed to raise the sun before returning inside and going through the few things she needed to make herself presentable in the morning. A light use of makeup, brushing her mane and tail, and a few practice smiles in the mirror. She’d let Twilight slumber and finish her dream, hopefully the sheets could handle such. The blanket was already wrapped around Twilight in a very possessive manner. Celestia attempted to not stare… at least she tried.
Leaving the room behind she knew she was going to have to get those sheets and blanket cleaned before night fell once more. For now she would choose to not think about it too much and instead focus on going to the breakfast table. Almost universally she had two breakfasts, the first was more for coffee and news and very much private. Or at least it usually was.
Rarity was in here and doing much the same thing that Celestia was. Drinking a cup of coffee and reading the news. Celestia took her usual seat and enjoyed the relative silence as she read the news. Taking a sip of her coffee she was unsurprised to see the headline for the day.
“Celestia and Luna plan to marry all six of the Elements of Harmony! Looks like Herds are the new trendsetter for our loving princess.”
Reading further, she realized the entire article was basically trying to suck up to Celestia and doing its best to talk about how Celestia had so much love to give she could not possibly give it only to one pony. Justifying a marriage such as this was probably not possible, but at least this newspaper learned from the mistakes of the last. She wondered how long that reporter was going to last on the sun. Point in fact, ponies could indeed survive there, assuming they could stand to not get eaten by the monsters living in the sun… she might set him free soon… maybe. Insinuations about Twilight were something she did not forgive easily and never forgot.
Rarity spoke reminding Celestia she was in fact not alone. “Seems that ponies are much more accepting of our marriage than I had hoped.”
Celestia cleared her throat. “Of course, they love their Princesses and would never, ever say anything bad about them. Once you’re a princess in full you’ll understand.”
Rarity smiled. “I simply cannot wait.”
Celestia smiled cruelly. “I do hope sharing us won’t be too troubling for you. We might not always have the time for you we wish we could.”
Rarity shrugged. “It’s alright, I have my Applepie if I need more love. So long as at least one of you is interested in me I will accept this.”
“I’m glad to hear it, unfortunately with how many brides we both have I fear Luna hasn’t been able to truly notice or appreciate your beauty yet.”
“I’m not so certain. Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy have been very good at taking her attention. It might be challenging to stand out amongst those two.”
Rarity took a long slow drink from her coffee, set it down and said, “Then I only need to stand out more. Surely I can do that.”
Celestia offered a smile. “I’m sure you can.”
“Go big or go home as they say.”
Celestia gave a small nod of approval. With some luck this would cause a backlash effect that would make Luna realize this marriage was a mistake. Even if Celestia had decided she was going to marry Pinkie Pie and was still forced to marry Twilight, she didn’t like the idea of the whole six way marriage. Setting up a few thorns might just push the idea into Luna’s head that perhaps forcing a sudden marriage upon six ponies who might be very easily swayed to jealousy was a mistake.
Did this put Equestria into danger by potentially threatening the friendships of the elements of harmony? Probably, but it was well worth it. Or at least it was probably worth it.
***
It finally came time for breakfast/dinner and Celestia couldn’t wait. By this point everypony had awoken and this time Twilight was quick to take her seat next to Celestia. Across the table Celestia watched as Fluttershy and Rarity booth took up one of Luna’s sides snuggling in. Applejack was next to Rarity trying to look less jealous but failing utterly. Rainbow Dash meanwhile had taken Celestia’s free side but wasn’t forcing herself up against Celestia, the same could not be said for Twilight. This left Pinkie facing Applejack and smiling for the world.
It would seem seating patterns were going to change on a whim and could hardly be considered reliable. Still she had heard Twilight’s conversation with Fluttershy last night, and she was the lynchpin in her whole operation. Using her student’s obsession with her as a weapon felt a little wrong but at this point she wasn’t even sure she wanted to end the marriage because she didn’t like the idea. The more time she had to get closer to these mares the more she realized she needed to end it because she might actually like it.
Still it was a wonderful breakfast and she happily took to grabbing a slice of cake first. A rich chocolate cake with deep red icing on top of it. It smelled as delightful as it looked. Careful to take only a small bite first to savor the flavor she did so and froze. It tasted… wrong. It wasn’t very sweet. In fact it was kind of dull and bland tasting. It smelled good, it looked good but it tasted poor.
Luna was smiling from across the table. “Oh, do you enjoy your cake?”
Celestia set it down. “Luna.”
Luna took a slice of the same cake and ate it as if there were no problems. “Mmm, I do oh so love my cake. So sweet, so tasty.”
Rarity’s mouth was salivating as she watched Luna eating the cake slowly. Luna smiled and offered some of her piece to the mare. Fluttershy’s eyes narrowed as Rarity took a small bite. She chewed for a moment and she looked utterly confused. A forced smile grew over her lips. “It’s good, thank you my love.”
Luna laughed. “No need to thank me, I would share all that I have with my diamond.”
Rarity snuggled in.
Luna continued eating the cake as Celestia sat her piece down. She did something to it. Not sure what, but something. Pinkie Pie was the next to try a slice of cake and took one bite before swallowing and glaring at it. “Sugar free? That’s hardly fair.”
Celestia blinked. No, no she did not. If Luna somehow removed the sugar from the cake this would be a nightmare. Celestia quickly lit up her horn and teleported the chocolate cake out, summoning forth a new rainbow cake in its place. There, have at you Luna. She took a new slice out and took a bite.
Luna’s smile only grew as Celestia deadpanned the cake. H-how, she couldn’t have known Celestia would go for the rainbow one next. Another spell and a new cake. Carrot cake this time, not exactly her favorite but sweet in its own right. Another slice and another bite and she realized with stark horror what must have happened.
Celestia did not even think to tell anypony where she was going as this time she teleported herself to the cake room. There were dozens of cakes in here. She tried each and everyone. One slice, one bite at a time. None of these cakes were sweet. Even the fruit cake which was as hard a brick had been void of sweetness. Luna had sucked all the sugar from every single cake in the castle!
Celestia narrowed her eyes. “This, means, war.”
***
Fluttershy sat at the table enjoying some stew and potato rolls. Even if it was morning for her, she seemed to be adjusting to Luna’s schedule a little more. Of course she had a strange craving for apples all of a sudden, so she made sure to keep a few close by as well. This was turning out to be the life she never knew she wanted and could never again live without. Being fed, brushed, pampered and kissed. It really was like being a pet.
Thankfully this was not the first time the group vanished from town for extended periods of time. It was the curse of a hero she supposed. The protocol always had Spike trying to let everypony know what was going on and how long they may be gone. From the Apple Family to the Cakes and… well those were the only two families that needed to know… in fact it was a little sad to think that herself, Twilight and Rainbow Dash didn’t have family to warrant a need to check in on.
Actually looking at Twilight now she began to realize that there were three ponies in this room that although they claimed they loved their folks, they had spent little time with them and were pretty distant. Rainbow Dash had gone to visit her parents a few times in the last couple of years, though it was hard to keep up with expectations for her, this news had to be a real shocker for them. Fluttershy loved her parents but at the same time even she felt like they were a little stifling. Pinkie’s insinuations about her mother’s loyalty were also a cause for concern… mostly there were some things Fluttershy kept secret about her parents that might give more credence to those thoughts than Fluttershy wanted to think about. After all she’d kissed Rainbow Dash a couple of times, in a more then friendly way, and thinking about the possibility for any blood relations there was too much to consider.
Point was she didn’t have to worry about her animals. When things like this happened Big Mac and Applebloom worked together to tend to her home as well as the others should they need it. So she could relax on that.
What she could not relax on was the fact Rarity’s hoof had somehow found a perch between Luna’s legs and was beginning to move in a fashion that made Luna blush a little. Fluttershy didn’t even think about it as she swatted her tail with alarming accuracy at Rarity’s flank. The mare yelped and drew her hoof back. Everypony looked at Rarity who was now blushing furiously, probably unsure of who just slapped her and what exactly to do about it. Luna reassured her by drawing her in close, but Rarity seemed to get the message and ceased her touching.
Twilight gave Fluttershy a knowing look. They didn’t need any words to communicate the message. They were both on the lookout for these mares trying to hound in on their territory. Well Fluttershy wasn’t going to let that happen and she had many, many plans before the day was out.
When the doors opened Fluttershy expected to see Celestia coming back in. Instead it was Cadance and Shining Armor. They both took seats at the table and filled plates full of food while talking.
Cadance apologized, “I’m so sorry that I missed dinner last night. We were in the middle of planning some parts of the wedding tomorrow. And I couldn’t pull myself away from it.”
Shining Armor nodded. “The wedding’s security detail is going well. How have your guards and servants been treating you?”
Rarity replied. “They’ve been great. The guard could use a little more muscle but he’s loyal as could be. The servant is also very wonderful, though I would prefer a mare who was a bit more flexible.”
Cadance rolled her eyes. “That’s Luna’s fault. She wanted to make sure there was nothing else going on in the servants or the guard’s heads as they tended to you six.”
Luna smiled. “It is not that I do not trust our staff, they know very well what would happen should they attempt to steal what is mine. No, I just want them to be working as effectively as possible for the needs of my wives.”
Rarity sighed and threw her leg over her eyes fainting into Luna’s side. “But I couldn’t order mine to be attracted to me if I tried. And I did try!”
Luna chuckled. “That is a good thing love. If you want somepony to be attracted to you, I feel there is a perfect alicorn for the job.”
Warning bells went off in Fluttershy’s head. “Oh, L-Luna. D-do you think you might be a little tired after all the hard work you d-did last night? M-maybe we should retire to bed?”
Luna wrapped a wing around Fluttershy drawing her close. “That is a great idea. I should like two ponies to cuddle.”
Rarity purred. “I could always make room to share you.”
Fluttershy gulped. This was not where she thought the morning would go. She was losing already. And worse yet, she was going to be dragged down into that loss by all her actions.
Fluttershy was not looking forward to this as she and Rarity were dragged off into the hall. Well dragged was a bit too much. Perhaps gently guided by the softest and most gentle wing in all of Equestria was more accurate. However, with the end goal being Luna’s room in mind Fluttershy could only feel as though she was being dragged by a chain.
There had to be a solution to get Rarity to go. If it was just her and Luan that was fine but Rarity was not invited as far as Fluttershy was concerned. Of course it would be awkward to bring up how technically Rarity was just as much one of Luna’s fiancés as was Fluttershy.
If only Twilight had given her plans for how to deal with this fiasco. She only gave her the tool to stop Pinkie. How could she stop Rarity?
What was worse was that Applejack for some reason was following along. Her cheeks looked awfully pink as she quietly followed alongside. Luna hadn’t discouraged her so Fluttershy could only imagine she was invited too. Wasn’t it bad enough that Rarity was getting involved, why Applejack?
A plan came to mind as they rounded a corner. Fluttershy tried to keep her smile away and her tone concerned as she asked, “Rarity, with all the events in the past couple days… d-do you think you and Applejack will still fit in your wedding dresses?”
Rarity stopped dead in her tracks nearly dragging Luna with her. The mare’s eyes were going small again. Fluttershy smiled. “O-oh no, I d-didn’t mean it in um, a bad way.”
Rarity’s ear twitched. “SERVANT!”
Almost like magic Rarity’s servant appeared beside her and in the dullest tone of voice asked, “What can I do for you, Lady Rarity?”
Rarity’s horn began to glow and Applejack was dragged toward them. “Where are the dresses for the wedding being kept. I must make final adjustments to make sure we will all fit.”
The servant nodded, turned and led the two away. Applejack pouted but didn’t complain as she was dragged off. Luna laughed. “Well a mare before marriage is usually a fickle pony indeed. I recall hearing many tales of mares doing all sorts of random things before their marriage. Stallions too for that matter.”
Fluttershy let out a contented sigh. “W-well um… w-we can still g-go to bed. They can um… catch up later.”
Luna nodded and led Fluttershy back toward the room. If Fluttershy was totally honest, she hadn’t stayed a single night in her own room. Not that it wasn’t amazing, but Luna was just so much more. Following her princess into the room she realized that she had passed the first test this morning. Still she would have to fend off many more such attacks before the day was though she feared.
***
Twilight felt bad for Fluttershy, having to contend against Applejack and Rarity. The poor mare stood hardly a chance. She was going to go out and help them when she noticed Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash whispering in the corner. Since breakfast/dinner was basically done they were up to something and she couldn’t tell what.
Listening in and maybe using a little bit of magic to increase her hearing she heard Rainbow Dash finish. “-ing her distracted until I’m done with Celestia.”
Pinkie Pie whispered back. “Can do, Rainboo!”
“Did you just call me ‘rainboo’? that’s… not cool.”
Twilight’s horn was about to light up, she was already channeling energy into it for a teleport. It never went off as a piece of cake went flying right into her face. For a moment Twilight sat there, stunned. She wiped it off with a hoof and saw Pinkie Pie holding another piece of cake in her hoof. Twilight narrowed her eyes. “Don’t, you, dare.”
Pinkie grinned. “Food fight!”
The cake piece went flying at Twilight but with a swift dodge it missed by a mere inches. Twilight levitated up a pie and flung it in Pinkie’s direction. Pinkie Pie did a backflip and put a chair between her and the pie as a shield. Twilight moved around the table to keep her distance as she realized with stark horror the bowl of mashed potatoes was missing from the table. Mortars of potatoes fell from the sky and Twilight had to dip, duck, doge, and dive to avoid them. They splashed around her soiling her legs. Twilight grabbed a pitcher of lemonade and levitated it over where Pinkie was hiding before upending it upon the poor mare. Pinkie shrieked as she was soaked with the cold liquid.
A manic laugh escaped Pinkie as she changed tactics. Jumped back onto the table and grabbed a bread stick in her mouth. Twilight grabbed a soup ladle in her telekinesis as Pinkie jumped toward her swinging the bread stick. Twilight parried blow after blow.
“You better give it up, Pinkie!” Twilight called. “I took fencing lessons in school!”
Pinkie Pie giggled around the bread in her mouth and dropped her body low, swinging her hips around as she spun in a circle on the floor. Pinkie’s legs hit Twilight's, knocking her to the ground where Pinkie proceeded to whack Twilight on the head with the breadstick. It didn’t hurt so much as get stuck on her horn.
Twilight growled as she jumped up and chased after the mare. They ran around the table. Pinkie jumped onto the table. Twilight followed suit. Soup, cake, pie, pancakes, and biscuits all went flying in their chase. Eventually Twilight realized she couldn’t keep up so she pulled the bread off her head and levitated every non-crushed biscuit in the room. All forty five of them. Pinkie shrieked as biscuits went flying after her. Each one missed as Pinkie deftly dodged them smashing into the floor, the walls and even the ceiling. Twilight was not going to let this dishonor go unpunished.
***
Rainbow Dash was flying quickly but not too quickly to look troubled as she flew through the castle halls. She only had one simple goal, find Celestia. The look on Celestia’s face and the change in the way she held herself was noticeable even to Rainbow Dash. Unlike Twilight though she wanted to check up on the mare and make sure she was okay. She took a bite of that cake to make sure and realized it was dull. Far as she knew, it was actually illegal to ruin Celestia’s cake so whoever did this was going to be in the deep end.
Besides all that, she wanted to make some brownie points with Celestia. If she was the one to cheer her up, and not Twilight, it would make Rainbow Dash seem more cool. She might even get another kiss out of it. Now wouldn’t that be something?
She did eventually find the mare, she was standing out in the courtyard. There were three animals being held aloft in her golden aura. A raccoon that was hissing and thrashing about. A bear who was doing much the same. Finally a skunk that looked terrified.
Rainbow Dash slowed down after seeing the skunk. “Hey, Celestia, what’s going on? Animal trouble?”
Celestia frowned. “You could say that.”
“Should I get Fluttershy, she’s really good at handling animals.”
Celestia smiled. “Oh no, it’s fine. I’m actually hoping these animals could help me in a prank. You see all three have great potential for a good prank but I’m not sure which one to use.”
“Oh, pranks. I’m like the queen of pranks. Let me help!”
Celestia’s smile grew. “If you could help me make this prank perfect, I would reward you most handsomely.” She gave a wink that promised Rainbow Dash a great time if she could do as the princess ordered.
Rainbow Dash looked at the three of the critters all agitated before them. “Hmm… raccoons, excellent thieves, can cause some fright, and destroy pretty much everything. It's a good and subtle choice.”
She looked to the next target. “Bears are usually a bit extreme. So long as you’re making sure they don’t actually hurt the target in question though, they are absolutely scary. Like, mare wetting herself in terror kind of scary.”
The last target. “Ahhh skunks. The classic stinker. I don’t think that one ever stops being funny. It’s also a really easy one to hide until the right moment strikes too.”
Celestia nodded. “My thoughts exactly, and fear not for the target's safety, I’m sure they can take care of themselves against something as trivial as a bear.”
Rainbow Dash hovered next to Celestia and rubbed her chin. “Mmmmm, this is a hard one. They are all such good choices. Too bad you can’t just choose all of them right?”
Celestia’s eyes widened. “Rainbow Dash, you… you genius.”
“What did I say?”
“Use, all, of, them.”
Rainbow Dash’s eyes widened in response before she started laughing. “Oh, now that is funny. Let’s do it.”
Celestia looked at her. Her horn lit up and dragged Rainbow Dash closer. Celestia carefully pecked Rainbow Dash on the cheek. “Will you take me as your partner in pranks?”
Rainbow Dash grinned. “I do.”
***
Once the prank had been set up and was just waiting to be triggered Celestia made her way with Rainbow Dash close by her side to the dining room. She still had some room for some food. Upon their arrival to the set of wooden double doors leading in they heard a crash followed by an explosion.
Celestia feared what would be in there. Rainbow Dash facehoofed and nearly whispered, “I said distract Twilight, don’t start a frigging war with her. You were supposed to like, kiss her or something…”
Celestia swallowed and opened the door only to reveal an actual battle zone. There were scorch marks on the floor. Chunks of the wall, ceiling, and floor were missing. The table had cracks in it, and one of the legs was snapped off completely. The chairs all piled into two separate barricades on either end of the dining hall. Food, food was sprayed, smashed, splashed, and smooshed everywhere.
Twilight was hiding behind her fortress of chairs and firing actual laser beams from her horn at Pinkie’s fort. Pinkie returned fire with her party cannon, only an actual cannonball came flying out knocking a huge chunk out of Twilight’s chair. If the two of them weren’t smiling and laughing like two school fillies having a normal food fight, Celestia would have sworn they were trying to kill each other.
Twilight cried from her fort. “PINKIE, give up! You cannot win against the tactical genius of Princess Twilight Sparkle, Princess of the best chair fort!”
Pinkie cried back. “NO WAY, JOSE! You can’t win against the princess of parties! Pinkie PIE!”
Rainbow Dash cleared her throat. “Celestia, please, please forgive me. I didn’t mean for this. I just wanted Pinkie to keep her distracted, this… this is insanity!”
Celestia took in a slow steady breath. “I do not hold you accountable. I am sure that Twilight was the one to escalate this to lasers and cannonballs…”
Celestia activated a golden shield around herself and walked into the warzone. “Pinkamena Diane Pie. Twilight Aurora Sparkle!”
Both of the crazed mares stopped in place and stared at her with wide eyes. Twilight began to speak but Celestia was quick to cut her off. “No! You two are both in so much trouble. Do you understand how much damage you did to my dining room? That chair that’s on fire in the corner over there? That’s my favorite chair!”
Rainbow Dash had noticeably stayed back in the hallway. Celestia’s horn lit up and both troublesome mares were lifted into the air and dragged toward her. Once only a few feet away she inspected them first for any harm, they both looked uninjured, and then she realized both of them were an absolute mess. “I would spank the both of you two right now if I hadn’t recently learned that some ponies enjoy the activity and I suspect one if not both of you would.”
Pinkie Pie swallowed. “Um… you can still do that even if we like it right?”
Celestia fixed her a glare that would set weaker ponies on fire. “I would have the two of you spanked, and forced to write two thousand page essays on why destroying my dining room was a bad idea and why you’re so sorry. Since neither of you have the time to either heal in the infirmary from the whooping I’d give you, or to write the essay I shall be lenient this one, and only time.”
Twilight swallowed.
Celestia smiled and set them down. Not as gently as they may have liked. “You two are to clean this entire room yourselves, without the help of any servants, guards or anything past a simple telekinesis spell.”
Twilight balked. “But, but, but-“
“Or would you prefer magic kindergarten?”
Twilight stopped complaining. “Come on, Pinkie… I’ll show you where the janitorial closet is.”
Celestia watched those two walk away, heads hung low. She was feeling very much in control for the first time in days and happy with it. In fact she was filled with energy after such a display of power. She wanted to use her power some more, do something with it, perhaps even something not so appropriate of the Princess of the Sun.
Rainbow Dash stumbled over to her side. “Celestia… has anyone ever told you how hot you are when you’re mad?”
Celestia grinned at the vulnerable young thing next to her. “Oh, maybe. You could tell me more about it back in my private quarters if you’d like.”
Rainbow Dash stared up at her, the gears clearly turning in her brain trying to decipher what she had meant. When it dawned on her the poor thing’s face went from blue to bright red. “I… I’d like that.”
So Celestia was off with her soon to be bride, and a new found energy she had every intention of abusing. She was left with only one question soon to be answered: Did Rainbow Dash, in fact, taste like skittles?
***
Rarity, finally finished with her measurements as well as Applejack’s had been dismayed to find out that they both had in fact put on just a little more since the last time those measurements were taken. Thankfully not enough to affect the dresses, but Fluttershy had been right to question it. Before the night was over, Rarity was going to have to take everypony’s measurements again, save for Twilight, Luna and Celestia’s. those never changed it would seem.
Now free of the humiliating task they made their way back to Luna’s room, hopeful to catch up on what they’d missed from the mare earlier. For some reason Applejack was interested as well, but that only worked out in Rarity’s favor. There was an odd tension in the air as they approached the door, though Rarity wasn’t certain what it was.
She had feared maybe it was her, and she wasn’t ready for this level of commitment yet. Still, if Fluttershy and Twilight were going to be getting all the action, she wanted some for herself as well. Opening the door Rarity embraced the soon to follow chaos of love between four ponies.
What she embraced instead was a skunk that jumped out onto her chest. Its eyes met hers and the thing was terrified beyond belief. When skunks were scared they had a tendency to emit a foul terrible odor that smelled more like Pinkie’s bedroom on her stressful days than it had any right too. Both Rarity and Applejack were consumed by the stench as the thing jumped off of her and ran down the hall.
A raccoon leapt out of the darkness next and landed in Rarity’s mane scratching, tearing and pulling at her hair until Applejack managed to push it off. This left Rarity’s mane an utter wreck to say the least.
If that wasn’t enough she heard Fluttershy and Luna scream in unison before they saw it. “RUN!”
A bear came staggering out of the darkness. Its eyes enraged and its claws extended. Both Rarity and Applejack didn’t have to tarry, no they galloped as far and as quick as they could as they saw the bear wrapped up in a blue aura which stopped it in place. Behind them Rarity saw Fluttershy leap onto it’s back with a powerful kick that knocked it over, she then grabbed it’s head and with a powerful twist… the bear stopped moving. Fluttershy’s eyes were red, and her pupils looked more like slits as she proceeded to jump playfully on its back.
Rarity and Applejack took one look at that and decided it was better to keep running. The worst part was that the bear didn’t even get the luxury of a quick death, it’s legs were still twitching.
Celestia had dragged Rainbow dash off to her quarters. The two of them lay on the bed staring into one another’s eyes. The small pegasus looked up with expectant and nervous eyes. Using one of her wings she gently stroked Rainbow Dash’s cheek drawing lines that made the mare shiver with delight. It had been a long, long time since she had known such power over a pony to make them feel as much pleasure as she desired them to have.
Leaning over she brought her muzzle within centimeters of Rainbow’s. Their breath mixed in the air between them. The small thing’s breathing was fast, shallow, and her heartbeat, if Celestia heard it correctly, was as faster than Rainbow Dash’s flight speed. Gently Celestia leaned over pressing her lips against Rainbow Dash’s.
The mare’s wings shot out instantly becoming rigid and hard. It was just a simple small kiss, but it drew so much pleasure from the mare she had what some referred to as a ‘wing boner’. The power Celestia felt was amazing. She couldn’t help herself as she kissed again, and once more. Rainbow Dash had started kissing back at this point, seemingly confident in what was happening.
It was when Rainbow Dash’s lips parted, perhaps on purpose, perhaps on instinct, that Celestia moved forward with her plan. Learning from her last experience she kept herself in as much control as she could and their tongues met. Rainbow Dash had an interesting flavor that she had not expected. It wasn’t skittles!
Somepony, somewhere, at some point in time had lied to her about that.
Rainbow Dash tasted like morning dew, or like a rain cloud just after a light shower. It was a down to earth, simple flavor that Celestia could get used too. Keeping herself in control was a lot easier with Rainbow Dash than she’d expected. No shoving her tongue so deep she made the mare vomit, just barely going in far enough to get a taste.
Once she pulled back she began kissing along the side of Rainbow Dash’s neck drawing lines of pleasure and gasps from the mare. One of Celestia’s wings reached further back and stroked something that made Rainbow Dash jump.
Just as Celestia was about to go a little further she felt Rainbow push her wing away with a hoof. Was her advance being rejected? Celestia paused, unsure. Maybe she just wasn’t in a comfortable position.
Rainbow Dash spoke in a volume just above a whisper. “C-Celestia…”
Celestia swallowed. Oh no, what did she do wrong this time? “Yes, my Raincloud?”
Rainbow Dash met her eyes. There was uncertainty and fear inside them. “I’m sorry.”
Celestia offered a smile but was feeling just as scared inside herself. “It’s quite alright.”
“I just… haven’t gone further than making out before, I don’t want to do that yet you know. I might be fast but even I can take some things slow.”
Celestia blinked. Had she forgotten the mare was a virgin? Of course Rainbow Dash would want to be more careful before doing anything a little more intimate. She likely accepted that today was the last day such things were going to be a possibility but if Rainbow Dash didn’t feel comfortable jumping the gun just yet, then Celestia could hold off for her. Though she really did want some practice as she was a little worried that if she didn’t get someone then her first time with Twilight might just break the poor thing.
Rainbow Dash looked down and away. “I… you’re not going to stop kissing me are you?”
Celestia used her muzzle to lift up Rainbow’s chin by nuzzling her. She went back to kissing soon after to let the mare know she did nothing wrong by requesting they hold off on some more of the intimate parts. Celestia was patient, she could wait for Rainbow Dash to be comfortable with such things.
For a while they stayed there, kissing, lightly touching, holding each other’s hooves. It was going well and she could feel Rainbow Dash relaxing more and more by the moment. They might very well go a little further if Rainbow Dash’s interest was any indication.
Of course that’s when they heard something from a good distance away crash followed by the sound of shattering glass. Celestia pulled away from Rainbow dash. For a moment they watched the door in silence.
Rainbow Dash swallowed. “It wasn’t me.”
Celestia groaned. “I know… and I think I also know who it was. Let’s go check on our little cleaning princess and baker to see exactly what they broke this time.”
***
With luck it turned out that the royal bath waters had some sort of enchantment on them that made the waters cleanse a pony of any sort of stink, stain, or otherwise unwanted substance. So it was no time at all before Rarity and Applejack were not only clean but smelled good as well.
Laying back in the tub Rarity looked up at the ceiling and murmured to herself. “So… we’re both hunting Princess Luna then?”
Applejack whose name was soaking wet, her hat removed and looking back at her with a pair of the greenest eyes Rarity ever did see replied. “Ah don’t think hunting is the right word fer trying to get intimate with our mutual fiancé, but ayep.”
Rarity barely heard her as she stared at that freckled face. Despite the fact this morning had been ruined she couldn’t help but to admire Applejack’s simple beauty. There was something utterly adorable and lovable about her. If she wasn’t already exhausted from all the adrenaline running through her she might be tempted to jump Applejack’s bones then and there. Instead she settled for staring.
Applejack waved a hoof. “Equestria to Rarity. You in there?”
Rarity smiled. “Just admiring your beauty.”
Applejack’s cheeks went pink and she looked away. “Thanks…”
“I can’t wait to see you in your wedding gown. You’re going to be the most beautiful bride there.”
“Oh shucks, Rares. Ah’m sure you’ll be taking the top spot easy.”
“No, nopony can top you my dear.” Rarity’s horn lit up and she dragged Applejack closer where she wrapped a leg around her waist. Applejack leaned her head on Rarity’s shoulder and let out a sigh of content. “You truly are the most beautiful thing in Ponyville, and I could be no happier than to call you my wife.”
Applejack snuggled in. “You know Ah feel the same.”
“Maybe we should work together than.”
“Together fer what?”
“Work together to get Luna to be with us. If we team up surely nopony or force could stop us from our mutual fiancé’s loving embrace.”
Applejack laughed. “So basically you want mah help to get us to have a threeway with Luna.”
“I hadn’t thought about it that way, but yes. It’s exactly what I want.”
“Alright, but on one condition.”
Rarity didn’t want to make conditions here but if it was important to Applejack she would. “What is it?”
“We ask Luna to turn herself into a stallion fer us. Trust me, yer gonna like it.”
Rarity had no idea what she meant by that, but as strange a request as it was, Rarity could allow it. After all, she was there to get Luna to notice her so she could be an important bride, instead of just some random pony that lucked out in marrying her. “Alright, darling. It sounds only fair.”
***
Twilight was feeling a bit miserable as she scrubbed the walls with a brush. Pinkie Pie was singing to herself as she cleaned her half of the dining room. How did things go so out of control? Twilight was sure that Pinkie Pie started this, so how did they get to the point of destroying everything with lasers and cannonballs? Actually Twilight wasn’t so sure about how that started. She just felt bad for destroying Celestia’s dining room.
Very few times in her life could Twilight say that Celestia was ever disappointed in her, fewer more could she say Celestia was actually angry with her. The last time she’d seen Celestia so upset was when Twilight uncovered Chrysalis’s plans in the Canterlot Wedding. Things were different this time because she wasn’t going to turn out to be right and have some evil changeling responsible for everything. No, she was at fault here and had to fix this mess herself.
They were at least most of the way done by then. Twilight wasn’t allowed to do anything more than a simple telekinesis spell. Sure she could take advantage of the wording and use multiple instances of it levitate a hundred brushes and clean everything at once. She could, but even she wasn’t dense enough to do that and risk Celestia’s ire twice. After all, at the end of the day they had to share a bed together… or Celestia could kick her out for the evening…
She decided to just clean everything the old fashioned way.
It took a good couple of hours to fully clean this place. The one thing they did need help with was getting new chairs. Some of them were destroyed beyond repair, and Twilight might have used a less simple spell to repair the damage done to the table and the chairs she could fix. Especially Celestia’s favorite chair.
Once finished Twilight smiled. “Well that went well.”
Pinkie Pie grinned. “Yeppers. It was a lot of fun though!”
Twilight laughed. “Yeah, it was. I really needed that… thanks.”
Pinkie Pie wrapped a foreleg around Twilight’s neck and dragged her into a full on kiss. Before Twilight even knew what was going on Pinkie’s tongue had slipped into her mouth and was having it’s way with Twilight’s. The first thing Twilight noticed was that Pinkie tasted like cake… just, how? The second thing she noticed was that she was somehow on the floor now with Pinkie Pie on top of her.
One of the buckets was spilled over and the two ended up rolling over into the dirty water getting soaking wet but their mouths didn’t stop for an instant. Hooves caressed each other’s sides and flanks. Wings worked a pink back and ran through curly tangled pink hair. They kept rolling over knocking a chair or two over as well as a few more buckets. Something else fell off the table and clanked loudly as it hit the floor.
Twilight and Pinkie didn’t even need to pull away for breath. At some point Twilight thought it wise to try flying so she could stop hitting things as she made out with Pinkie. It was a good idea until, not being able to see the ceiling, they hit the chandelier and the entire thing came crashing to the floor. After that they hit the table hard enough to knock it over and break the table leg they just fixed.
They didn’t stop kissing until Celestia’s voice rang out and a golden aura surrounded the two of them forcing them to separate. Twilight struggled to go back to Pinkie for a moment before her mind began to clear and she looked at the renewed destruction around them.
Celestia was there with Rainbow Dash next to her. Rainbow Dash had some lipstick stains along her neck. The stains belonged to a massive pair of lips… Celestia sized lips.
Still Twilight couldn’t think of that as Celestia stared right at her. “You two can’t even make out without destroying everything in sight, can you?”
Twilight swallowed, her mouth still tasted of cake and frosting. “It’s… it’s not my fault. Pinkie Pie started it.”
Pinkie Pie raised a hoof. “Yes I did.”
Celestia closed her eyes and shook her head slowly before sitting them down. “New rule, no making out in the dining room. Also, I’m not going to ask you two to try cleaning anymore. Just… go.”
Twilight lowered her head. This was the second time she had disappointed Celestia. With slow steady steps she walked out of the dining room. The first time she was scared and just wanted to fix it. This time she was disappointed in herself. Her heart was breaking as she realized just how much she might have pushed Celestia’s buttons.
Pinkie Pie didn’t look much better as she matched Twilight’s pace.
Celestia let out a sigh as her horn began to glow. “Come, Rainbow Dash. We’ll go fetch a few servants to clean this properly.”
Rainbow Dash glanced back at them. “I’m sure they didn’t mean to do this… this time.”
Celestia shook her head. “That’s why I’m only disappointed this time and not angry.”
Somehow hearing that hurt Twilight in a way she couldn’t quite put into words. Today was going to be a long day.
Just outside of the dining room she found Luna. There was a mischievous look in her eyes as her horn lit up. “Twilight, my love. It seems like you're having a hard day. What if I helped you… have more fun?”
Twilight offered a small smile. “Well… Celestia is still angry with me but… maybe it’ll help distract me.”
“Oh I think distractions a plenty are in store for you.” Luna’s horn gave off a bright glow and Twilight felt a cold welcoming presence press into the folds of her already weakened mind. There wasn’t any resistance as the cold swept over her and she began to care less and less about Celestia being angry with her. After all, it was her wedding tomorrow, and she deserved to feel like the best, the happiest, and the most powerful of them all.
Chapter Thirty One: When Twilight Falls Over the Castle
Chapter Thirty One: When Twilight Falls Over the Castle
Written by TheCrimsonDM
Well, it wasn’t the most awkward position Twilight had found herself in that day. Just the last one she ever thought she’d have to actually worry about or deal with. Her parents were both there in front of her as she sat in the lounge area.
Twilight Velvet nodded. “And this is… something you wanted?”
Twilight wasn’t sure how to answer that one. “Well it does come with certain benefits…”
Night Light, her usually very kind and loving and supportive father grinned at that sentence. “Well, that is about what Cadance was telling us. I guess we don’t have to worry about you ever cheating on your wife, or wives.”
Twilight Velvet snapped at him. “Night Light! Our little Twily would never do such a thing. I just hope she’s happy and not at all embarrassed by the things ponies are saying about her.”
Twilight Sparkle jumped in. “What are ponies saying about me?”
Twilight’s mom gently looked at her. “Oh darling, it’s nothing too terrible.”
Night Light agreed. “No, not at all. Just that Celestia may have been sexually grooming you from a young age to take you now that you’re a princess. And that she also began grooming all of your friends. And that she is doing this to be able to secretly marry her sister. And that it’s incestuous all around with Luna and Celestia being sisters, you being a second daughter to Celestia and Applejack and Pinkie Pie being cousins.”
Twilight Velvet added. “Oh and I’ve heard rumors those two pegasi were half sisters as well.”
Twilight stared at them. “Is that all?”
Night Light shook his head. “No, someponies think that you are actually evil and trying to take over Equestria by marrying the Princesses and usher in an era of lust and depravity… you um… you aren’t doing that are you?”
Twilight leaned back in her chair. “No, I am not.”
“Good, good.”
Twilight Velvet then added. “Also there are still the rumors of you actually being Celestia’s child instead of mine. Which now are making this whole situation a giant incestuous pot luck.”
Twilight stared at her mother. “There is no truth to those rumors, is there?”
“Of course not. I remember carrying you for a full year and how wonderful it was when you were born. Oh the doctors looked so scared when you shot a magical blast from your horn and destroyed the door to the hospital room.”
Night Light laughed. “At least you had fun with that. I was just outside that door you know and my cigarette turned to ash before I could finish it.”
Twilight Velvet smiled. “But that was the last cigarette you ever smoked.”
“Of course, how could I risk getting cancer when I had a baby girl who might destroy the world instead?”
Twilight Sparkle closed her eyes. Someponies wondered why Twilight wasn’t so close to her parents. There were a great number of reasons. From the fact that she lived in Ponyville, to the fact that they just acted like everything was fine and could joke about her destroying the world as if it was nothing, to the fact that they also completely ditched her on Celestia after Twilight’s cutie mark ended up causing a lot more destruction than they thought possible.
In fact, there were so many things that she had pushed down for so long now that she couldn’t keep them from bubbling up to the surface now. From her repressed desires for sexual activity, to a deep seated desire to watch the world burn. So many things she couldn’t just keep shoving down, not now that her world was changing so much.
Twilight Velvet spoke. “Are you okay, dear?”
Twilight groaned. “I’m fine…” her brain twitched. An old thought, an old question, came rising up to her mind. “So… you two approve of my marriages right?”
Night Light laughed. “Well I suppose it doesn’t matter if we do or not, it’s three princesses versus two little unicorns.”
“You have no problems at all, with the fact that I’m going to be deflowered on my wedding night, not just by Celestia my step mother, but also by Luna who could easily be my aunt in this case followed swiftly by five of my best friends in the world.”
Twilight Velvet’s smile wavered a moment. “No, not at all. Everything you do is perfect.”
Night Light’s smile looked strained as well. “Of course not.”
Twilight stared at them, her smile faded. They always did this. They agreed with everything she said and did. Ever since she got her cutie mark, created a dragon from what she still thinks was really a rock with spots painted on it, destroyed half the classroom, and turned her parents into imamate objects they have never once challenged her or disapproved of her. “You have no problem with the fact that I am going to take a lot more power over Equestria by doing so?”
They both swallowed but continued with the forced smiles. Shaking their heads to say they cared not.
Still agreeing with her as if they had no spines in their body. Like she was their perfect little princess that could never do wrong. “In addition to that, once I have obtained such power, I will be free to enact any laws I wish. Worship of me as the Princess of Friendship. Forced Friendship camps where ponies will have to learn how to be friends and listen to all of my teachings. A throne made of solid gold to stand higher than Celestia and Luna’s combined.”
They were still trying to smile but it looked so forced it was a grimace.
Twilight chuckled, there it was, they were finally showing their true faces after years of hiding them. “And then there will be the purges.”
Twilight Velvet stood up quickly. “Oh no, look at the time.” She looked at her bare foreleg. “We are late for an appointment. Come on dear.”
Night Light stood. “We love you, Twilight and will come visit again soon.”
“Like how you never once visited me in Ponyville.”
They both froze in their tracks.
“In fact, you only visited the academy once or twice during social gatherings. I don’t think you even ever saw my tower here even once. In fact, I would suggest that you two have never, actually reached out to me once since Celestia pretty much adopted me. No visits, no letters, no gifts even on my birthday you two didn’t come to the castle despite having invitations.” Twilight stood and they both flinched back. “The only time you two showed your faces in my life were when I was turned into a princess and only then because you didn’t want to lose face by not coming.”
They both backed up. Night Light stammered. “Twilight, we’re very busy ponies.”
Twilight glared at him. “Busy with what? Your retirement! You’ve been retired for five years now.”
Twilight Velvet whispered into Night Light’s ear, but Twilight could hear it with her enhanced Alicorn senses. “I knew she was an evil monster. Nopony has that much magic and doesn’t become evil. We need to run.”
Night Light smiled thinking Twilight couldn’t have heard that. “Of course dear, we are busy with meetings and helping other ponies with their thriving career choices. We actually have a very important appointment right now.”
Twilight’s horn lit up. “Tell you two what. Don’t bother coming to the wedding. My evil monster super powers are too much for you two to handle, but it’s okay, I have a mom who loves me and is willing to marry me for some reason despite my powers. Twilight Velvet is right, you two need to run.”
The two of them vanished in an instant and Twilight could hear only the vaguest of screams from somewhere outside the castle as two ponies suddenly appeared three feet above the pond and fell in. Oh yes, Twilight was quite done with these games. She was going to become not just a princess, but a super princess married to the other princesses. She had no time for those who did not wish for her existence.
Spike showed up from around the corner. “So… it happened exactly as you said it would.”
Twilight nodded. “It did. Now, we just need to buy some time. If they want me to become an evil super pony ruler of all lesser ponies, then guess what, I will. For now, it’s time to get married and practice on my evil monologue voice. I think I have the laugh down.”
“Yeah you’ve been practicing it for years.”
Twilight smiled. “Yes, yes I have.”
“So… what are we going to do today?” Spike asked.
“What we do every day, Pinkie. Take over the world?” Twilight stopped herself. “You’re the wrong pony.”
“Twilight, I’m not even a pony, so yeah, wrong pony.”
Twilight shook her head. “Oh… right, I actually expected Pinkie Pie to be the one to drive me to becoming evil… nevermind, prepare my evil dress. The black slinky one. I need to get ready. Midnight Sparkle is coming to the wedding.”
***
To say that Twilight did not expect Shining Armor to be as upset as he was, was like saying Twilight Sparkle was not an insanely powerful madmare. He glared at her as they sat in a private room. His forelegs were crossed over his chest. Cadance was next to him with a stern expression but she hadn’t shown her anger yet.
“So,” Shining Armor began for the fifth time. “You scared our parents, threatened them, and then dumped them into a pond all before telling them they were no longer allowed to your wedding.”
Twilight nodded and took a sip of her tea. A bit too sweet for her liking. “That sounds about right.”
“And you have no remorse for your actions, not even a little.”
“None.” Twilight took another sip. The paintings on the walls here were all of mountains and forests. This room was calming and peaceful. She reminded herself she would need one with paintings of caves and night fall. Something a bit more dark themed.
Shining Armor growled. “I am a prince, a ruler, an ex-guard captain, but most of all I am your brother and I am disappointed.”
Twilight gave him a patient smile. “Are you done?”
He blinked. “Excuse me?”
“You’re excused, you can leave now.”
He worked his jaw in silence a few times. Cadance came to his rescue. “Twilight, I know your getting married tomorrow and this is all quite stressful for you, but you can’t just… okay I have to ask, why are you wearing that?”
Twilight moved a leg over her chest gesturing to the black slinky dress she wore. The one with no back. “Oh this, it’s just a little something for my darling Princesses.”
Cadance raised an eyebrow. “Well… it’s surprisingly sexy on you. Anyway, the point is you can’t treat your parents or your brother that way.”
Twilight smiled around her cup of tea taking another sip. “Why not?”
“Why… why not?”
“Yes, answer me, why not?”
Shining Armor seemed to have finally found his brain, or his backbone, or both. Things that Twilight wouldn’t mind surgically removing if he became a thorn in her side. “Because you hurt our parents' feelings and humiliated them, and you’re hurting mine.”
She reached out and put a hoof over Shining's squeezing gently. “Oh no, I’m so sorry. I never meant to hurt your feelings, Shiny. Should I kiss them better? I think I’ve gotten quite good at that lately.”
His face turned pale as if he’d seen a ghost. Cadance swatted Twilight’s hoof away with one of her own. “Even if this is some kind of madness or a joke, that is not funny.”
Twilight laughed. “Oh lighten up, you’re supposed to be the Princess of Love, shouldn’t you be tolerant of all kinds of love?”
“Not ones involving my husband… which is also your brother… for Celestia’s sake, Twilight. What is wrong with you?”
Twilight grinned. “It finally dawned on me. After all of this time being a princess, being Celestia’s pupil, being forced into unwanted situation after unwanted situation, that I am actually quite powerful, very influential, and in need of demonstrating exactly what I am to the world.”
Shining Armor’s eyes widened. “But… but Celestia is marrying you, how could you become evil?”
Twilight stood up and walked away. “Oh my, whoever said I was evil? That is just silly. No, I’m just powerful.”
Twilight opened the door and saw Spike there. “Oh, Spike, I’m sorry you’ve been kept waiting. Could you please talk to them and explain why my so-called parents are no longer invited to my wedding.”
Twilight walked out of the room as Spike entered. She listened just long enough to hear Spike say, “I was there, you have no idea what your parents admitted too. It’s… kind of awful.”
With the door closed behind her Twilight moved on to see Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie sitting in the hall. They were playing a game of tic-tac-toe. It seemed that Pinkie was… did she just lose?
Pinkie Pie giggled. “Oh no, I lost.”
Fluttershy smiled. “I-I won?”
Twilight walked up to them. “Guess we have to reward the winner somehow?”
Before Fluttershy could say anything she was lifted into the air by a gentle red aura and her lips met Twilight’s. Once Twilight pulled away and set the mare back down she laughed. “You really will make a great pet, Fluttershy. Never change.”
Twilight walked away as the stunned Fluttershy sat there. Pinkie Pie groaned. “No fair, Twilight. Just getting all the kisses.” She leaned forward and kissed Fluttershy as well. Only deeper. Fluttershy fell onto her back with Pinkie Pie on top of her. It didn’t look like Fluttershy really minded much, she was the winner after all and deserved only the best rewards.
Applejack had to admit, she felt a little dirty about wanting to get romantically involved with Luna. A little bit. There was some ingrained part of herself that said, over and over again, that this whole situation was wrong and that she and Rarity should be doing what normal ponies did and staying with each other. However, after seeing that masculine hunk Luna could become and that one solitary kiss, she knew it was too late. She’d fallen for Luna. At the very least she and Rarity were both in agreement that they should share Luna so there was no cheating going on.
What was unfortunate about deciding this was the fact that every time they seemed to get close to Luna something happened to ruin their plans. From Rarity needing last second adjustments to their wedding dresses, to a stampede of random animals inside of Luna’s bedroom, they were being blocked by fate itself. If this continued they’d have to request the help of somepony that was potentially going to cause problems for them… but also one who could break through the chaos of the world with a force that was beyond nature: Pinkie Pie.
For now they focused on what they could do together. Especially since they were cleaned now of any and all the filth covering them from the skunk. Now Rarity was good at charming ponies, she was in fact, really good at it. Applejack on the other hoof had barely gotten enough courage to ask Rarity out in the first place and she never would have done so if it wasn’t for that one night they had a sleepover at Twilight’s. The fact Twilight kept trying to do sleepovers after that was weird but neither of them felt comfortable doing that again.
The halls were quiet but not empty so the two of them had taken the opportunity to hide away in Rarity’s room after the bath. Originally Applejack thought there might be other ideas going through Rarity’s head, but when she pulled out a white board and marker she realized that they were only making plans instead.
Rarity smiled. “So, plan ‘Threesome with the Princess of the Night’ is underway. Ideas?”
Applejack shrugged. “We could just tie her up, Ah got mah lasso and Ah’m pretty sure she likes that stuff.”
Rarity shook her head. “Darling, please… if we do that, she’ll need to give consent first, then we tie her up and have our ways with her. Also I feel that her ability to transform as you suggested might be hindered by such a thing.”
Applejack conceded. “Ayep, didn’t think about that.”
Rarity smiled. “Romantic dinner, just me, you, and her. Somewhere private with nopony else involved.”
“Sound’s fancy, but Ah reckon with how high strung everypony is that won’t work so well. Especially if Pinkie or Fluttershy show up.”
Rarity put the marker to the white board. “I noticed that too.” She drew Fluttershy’s name, put a circle around it, and then an X through it. “She’s blocking us, I am almost positive of it. And she is intelligent. Using my fears of my body type against me and animals against both of us…”
Applejack nodded back. “Not to mention she’s getting a bit creepy looking too.”
Rarity frowned. “You noticed that as well… I fear maybe it’s something to do with Luna’s ambient magic. You’ve heard the stories right?”
“Not really.”
“Stories of how Luna single hoofedly created the batpony race. Some suggest it was through terrible magic, others say by prolonged exposure and sleep, some even suggest they were her children though… well… I haven’t seen evidence of either princess having children.”
Applejack suggested, “Twilight?”
“Well that’s just a rumor, surely she wouldn’t marry Twilight if they were related… Luna might.”
“Well Ah guess incest is on the table.”
Rarity arched an eyebrow. “Oh, how often has incest been on the table at your home? Applebloom eats from that table you know.”
Applejack narrowed her eyes. “Rarity, Ah ain’t never slept with Big Mac.”
“I was thinking Braeburn but okay.”
“He’s mah cousin fer Celestia’s flanks sakes!”
Rarity gave her a knowing smile. “I’m joking. Pinkie’s the one putting incest on the table… I’d stay away from tables if I were you.”
“Noted. Now what are we gonna do to get Luna in bed with us that’s timely and reasonable?”
“First we need to distract Fluttershy. As well as Pinkie Pie…”
“Hmmm, we could distract one but the other still proves to be a problem don’t it?” Rarity’s eyes lit up with glee. “Unless we distract them with each other.”
Applejack stared at her. “And then what?”
“Sneak in Luna’s bed, risk waking her up, and letting her ravish us with everything she has.”
Applejack nodded. “Alright, Ah’m interested, but how do you reckon we get them distracted.”
Rarity’s grin grew wider. “I have just the idea! Oh Pinkie!”
They waited a few seconds. Applejack half expected Pinkie Pie to appear out from behind a painting or something. When nothing happened. Rarity called again. “PINKIE PIE!”
Still nothing. She walked to the door opened it up and looked up and down the hall. “That’s strange, usually that works wonders.”
Applejack shrugged. “Too bad there isn’t a party she’s missing.”
A pink blur dropped from the ceiling and rebuilt itself into the image of Pinkie Pie. She stood there only an inch away from Applejacks’ muzzle. “Hiya, cus!”
Applejack swallowed. “Howdy.”
Rarity smiled. “Pinkie Pie, did you know Fluttershy didn’t have a party yesterday?”
Pinkie Pie looked at her. “Oh really? What party did I miss? I thought I got everything already.”
“She missed her ‘first time sleeping with Luna’ party.”
Pinkie Pie gasped. “YOU’RE RIGHT! I need to hurry up and fix that. Thanks for letting me know.” She looked back at Applejack. “Oh and I need to do this because I’m only missing two places on my makeout bingo now.”
Applejack opened her mouth to ask what she was on about and instantly regretted it as Pinkie darted her head forward and shoved her tongue into Applejack’s mouth. The kiss lasted only as long as it took for Applejack to shove Pinkie off of her. Pinkie wiped a hoof at her lips and grinned. “Wow, you really do taste like apple pie.” She began hoping toward the door. “Okie Dokie Lokie, time to party with Fluttershy and then complete my bingo.”
Once she was gone, Rarity closed the door, locked it, gave a little sigh and unlocked it. “Well I’m sure that was traumatizing for you.”
Applejack looked around. “Ah need to brush my teeth before Ah start doing anything with my mouth involving Luna.”
Rarity laughed. “Well, if she really is as much of a packaged stallion as you say, you’re also going to need to dislocate your jaw too.”
“Haha, very funny, Rares… Uh… actually you might be onto something there.”
***
Fluttershy had been enjoying her time with Luna, but with their different hours she found herself wide awake in the slumbering embrace of her love, her princess, her moonlight. It was warm, but not so warm she was uncomfortable, and her eyes were adjusting to the darkness of the room well. In fact she could make out the shapes of most of the items in here with no extra light needed. Of course only the shapes were visible so details were still a mystery to her.
Still even in this loving embrace she found herself growing a little restless. Gently moving out of the embrace she pulled herself away from Luna and crawled out of bed. Luna shifted a little but never woke. The poor mare had been sleeping rather roughly from what Fluttershy could tell. She deserved more sleep. Hopefully once the weddings were done with and everypony settled down, and stayed away from her Luna, things would be okay.
Once outside of the bed she made her way to the door and cracked it open. She was surprised to find that it was bright, really, really bright out here. She slipped out of the room shielding her eyes with a wing. With her rear hoof she closed the door behind her. Moving was a little hard, parts of her still felt sore from being used a whole lot more than they were used too.
Luna was nothing if not filled with endurance. Moving onward she walked down the halls suddenly aware of every detail missed in the shadows. A spot of dust behind a table, a mouse hiding underneath a desk, a spider living amongst the leaves of a fern. One thing she didn’t notice earlier though was the trace scent of apples in the air. They smelled… good. Her nose followed them as she searched for the source.
Eventually she found herself walking toward the hall where their rooms were. The Hall of Friendship as it were. Inside she saw Applejack walking up to her. Applejack tilted her hat, “Howdy.”
Fluttershy marched up to her and pressed her nose into Applejack’s chest fur giving it a few sniffs. The mare flinched but stood her ground. Applejack smelled good, really good. Like really, really good. Fluttershy could feel her mouth salivating, she licked her lips, and her teeth, her k-9s felt a little sharper than usual.
Applejack took a step back. “Um, Ah know Ah just took a bath but Ah can’t smell that good can Ah?”
Fluttershy’s wings shot out wrapping around the back of Applejack’s head pulling her in close. No, she wasn’t getting away so easily, not when she smelled so good. Fluttershy moved her muzzle and smelled her, looking for the source of the scent. Trailing her muzzle along her delightfully sweet neck, up across her cheek to where her lips were.
The scent was irresistible. Fluttershy pressed her lips against Applejack’s and forced her tongue inside as the mare froze in her grasp. The inside of Applejack’s mouth, though not nearly as magical as Luna's, tasted of the most delicious, juicy apple she could imagine. If her mouth tasted this good then…
Fluttershy pulled back suddenly allowing Applejack to get a breath of air. With her wings she shoved Applejack’s head into the floor and proceeded to climb on top of her back using her hips to keep that head down. Fluttershy reached out with a wing and moved that swishing tail away. The smell was even stronger here. Fluttershy moved her teeth along the edges of Applejack’s flanks going toward the base of her tail. The smell was heavenly.
A pink head appeared right in front of her vision. Bright blue eyes stared into Fluttershy’s. “I know she smells and tastes good.” Pinkie gave Applejack a lick somewhere that caused Applejack to make the most adorable noise. “But you have to wait to try out the apple pie.”
Fluttershy growled at her. “This is my food.”
Pinkie Pie giggled. “No, I think it’s actually Rarity’s at least until we’re married. Oh, but we have something more important to do, and I can give you all the apples you want. Have you ever tried apple flavored cupcakes?”
Fluttershy growled. Looked down at the precious apples on her friend's flank. She gave them a lick, and then a bite causing the mare to yelp. “Mmmm… You’re going to take me away no matter what I say aren’t you?”
Pinkie Pie giggled. “Now you’re getting it.”
Fluttershy climbed off of Applejack’s back and put her wings back where they belonged against her side. They were a little rigid though so she had to struggle to keep them in place. “Lead me, Pinkie.”
As Pinkie Pie led them away Fluttershy stopped only long enough to look at the red faced Applejack. “I’ll come back to finish this meal later.”
The two of them left and Fluttershy had no problem with swishing her tail and swinging her hips to entice her future meal. Never before had Fluttershy realized just how attractive Applejack really was, and now she couldn’t wait to enjoy her later. For now she’d entertain the pink pony, after all even she knew that nopony could defeat Pinkie when she wanted something done.
Pinkie Pie giggled. “You’re going to love it, I have the best, ‘Just got laid by a princess’ party ever. Rarity had a different name for it but it was kinda weak.”
Rarity cried out from behind them. “I thought it was tactful!”
Twilight Sparkle sat in a chair, Twilight Sparkle was without a care, Twilight Sparkle wanted a kiss, Twilight Sparkle would not be remiss.
“I demand a kiss!”
Celestia and Rainbow Dash both stared at her. They were all in Twilight’s personal room, and she was still very much happy with her dress. From the looks Celestia first gave her, she seemed pleased with it as well. Unfortunately that look seemed to dissipate after Twilight’s demand.
Celestia was the first to speak. “You demand a kiss? From whom are you making demands.”
“From my lovely bride of course.”
Rainbow Dash’s voice nearly cracked as she spoke. “That applies to both of us, you know, and since I can’t imagine you’d ever have the guts to demand anything from our lord and princess, Celestia. I assume you want me to kiss you now?”
Twilight rolled her eyes. “Fine, I will take a kiss from you.”
Celestia stared at her. “Twilight… why do you think we both came here?”
“Clearly it’s to make your soon to be wife happy, kissing, touching, more. It’s all in the plan.”
Rainbow Dash groaned. “You know, this is my fault, I actually thought she was sane for like, a few minutes.”
Celestia rolled her eyes. “First she’s an evil enchantress, then a pirate, and now she’s… what would you call this?”
Rainbow Dash stared at Twilight. “A stuffy princess.”
“Needy princess?”
“Slutty princess?”
Celestia smiled at the last one. “Slutty, and Twilight are two words I would never have put together in the same sentence. Not in all my years would I have thought that possible.”
Twilight leaned back on her bed spreading her legs. “Call me what you will, but I am hungry and need something to fill me up.” Her eyes landed firmly on Celestia. “Something hot, heavy, and humid would do just fine.”
Rainbow Dash stomped a hoof. “So what am I? Chopped Broccoli?”
Twilight rolled her eyes. “I actually enjoy broccoli, so no.”
Rainbow Dash glared at her and took a step. “Oh so you don’t think I can kiss as good as Celestia.”
Twilight smiled at her. “Don’t take too much offense to this, but no, nopony can. Not even Luna and her wonderful star flavored tongue can kiss like Celestia.”
Celestia blinked. “Twilight, we’ve kissed precisely one time and you ended up-“
“Oh I know how I ended up, and honestly, I wasn’t done.” Twilight met her eyes. “I want your tongue to fill my insides, so deep it might just come out the other end. Until every fiber of my body and being is enraptured by the heat of your amazing grace and power.”
Celestia’s face went pale and she gagged. “N-no, I think I will not. You two can stay here if you wish but I feel I should leave.”
The door locked behind them and Twilight licked her lips. “Oh? But I am Mid- er Twilight Sparkle, Princess of Friendship, of Magic itself, and your future bride. Shouldn’t you do anything you can to please me?”
Celestia raised an eyebrow. “Twilight… I don’t need to use the door.”
Rainbow Dash gulped. “I do.”
Celestia shook her head. “We came here to talk about your recent behavior. I can understand your differences with your parents, honestly they were invited only out of respect for you and Shining Armor, but dumping them in the pond in public was perhaps a bit… cold?”
Twilight met her eyes. “You’re right. I should have sent them to the sun instead. You know, for a nice vacation.”
Celestia lowered her gaze a little. “Twilight.”
“No, Celestia, I love you, and I need you. I don’t need those fake parents of mine. Who cares if you’re secretly my real mom or not, I want you to be my lover, my one and only. I might be willing to share Fluttershy with you, she makes a great pet, but I want you all to myself.”
Celestia stared at her. “Is that what this is all about? You’re jealous of your friends?”
“How could I not be, you’ve spent so much time with them when it’s my wedding that was supposed to happen.”
Rainbow Dash cut in. “Hey, I love Celestia too. I’m willing to share, you know sharing is caring and all that.”
Twilight rolled her eyes. “The Golden Rule does not count in love, Rainbow Dash. If you must, you may turn your affection toward me, or I suppose I could loan Fluttershy to you. Celestia and Luna are mine though.”
Celestia shook her head. “Twilight, you’re acting horrible.”
Rainbow Dash whispered, “Bridezilla.”
“I am acting only in accordance with my level of power.” Twilight smiled. “I am, quite, powerful you see.”
“More powerful than me or Luna?”
Twilight sat up straight and giggled. “Oh, of course not. Nopony is more powerful than you two. Which is exactly why you deserve to be with me. Not these other, lesser ponies. I mean what can they do? Stare really hard at things, create rainbow explosions from flying too fast, have psychic powers, create dresses, and bake apple pie? Which one of those things rhymes with ‘destroying an entire castle out of anger’ again? I feel I forget things sometimes.”
Celestia’s eyes narrowed. “Are you threatening me?”
Twilight blinked. “I… what?”
Celestia took a step forward. Her horn began to glow. “Did you threaten to destroy my entire castle, my home, the piece of art that I personally created over a thousand years, because you’re frustrated with my choice?”
Twilight was lifted up in a golden aura and dragged over to Celestia. “Celestia, n-no.”
Celestia only stopped once Twilight was right in front of her. “Not only that, you are also threatening my sister by the same virtue. She lives here too, you know.”
Twilight kicked her legs uselessly as she was dangling in the air. “No, I just, I was just making a point. They couldn’t do that, but I could.” The aura grew warm, hot even. Sweat was beading along Twilight’s face from the sheer heat in the room. “Celestia, I didn’t mean it like that. I meant like, the castle of our enemies.”
“OH and who is an enemy of Equestria and has a castle still standing after I got done with it? Cadance perhaps? The Crystal Empire has one. Is that the castle you speak of?”
Twilight felt a cold fear running down her spine she hadn’t felt in years. In fact she hadn’t felt this way since the very first time she realized just how much power she held over ponies. So many of her classmates were broken down to their most groveling forms as they bowed to her and brought her books, snacks, or whatever else she wanted. Teachers forced to give her good grades in spite of her actually doing good on her homework. And a single gym teacher hung from a flagpole by his shorts for giving her an A- for not wanting to get sweaty and dirty like the others. Needless to say Celestia was not pleased with that behavior just as she was clearly not pleased here.
Celestia’s eyes met Twilight’s and there was a burning fire, a deep fury, and power unending in that stare. It was like looking into the very depths of the sun itself. There was no escape from its heat, its ever gazing light, its endless boundless wraith. No escape from loving it for all it was worth.
Twilight couldn’t even speak, her mind was shaking as much as her body. She knew she’d crossed a line somewhere but wasn’t sure where anymore. Staring into those eyes she could only feel the pure endless power of Celestia.
Rainbow Dash’s voice was like a distant echo she could barely hear. “Princess Celestia, please don’t hurt her. She’s not alright, I think she broke yesterday and she’s not better yet.”
Celestia didn’t look away for one instant as she levitated Twilight back to the bed and laid her down on her stomach. “I agree, but I have seen this behavior from Twilight once before. No amount of book reading or hugging will fix this. You even heard her slip, she is no longer our Twilight Sparkle, she is Midnight Sparkle.”
Twilight froze. “No, please, Celestia no. I’m sorry, I won’t do it again.”
Celestia’s voice came out like a hot brand into her flesh. “That is precisely what you promised the last two times you did this. You are very powerful indeed, you could very easily destroy our entire home, and that is precisely why it is important for you, more than anypony else, to never abuse that power. No matter the circumstance or the stress.”
Twilight tried moving. She got one leg beneath her before she felt her body freeze up as a heavy invisible weight pressed down on her. Her dress was lifted up and over her tail exposing her rump. It might have also exposed Twilight’s body reacting most favorably to the scorn of the sun.
Celestia stuck her nose slightly up as if in disgust. “Rainbow Dash, you may want to leave for this, it might be too painful to watch her punishment.”
Rainbow Dash unlocked the door and opened it up. “Yeah, I uh… I’m sorry, Twilight. I tried…”Just as she left she looked back long enough to say, “Um… just so you know, she might enjoy whatever you're about to do. She’s getting really weird lately.”
Celestia gave her a knowing smile. “Who said I didn’t already know that?” The door shut as a golden aura wrapped around it and locked it. Celestia made sure to meet Twilight’s eyes. “You wanted a kiss right?”
Twilight nodded. “That’s all I wanted, just a kiss.”
“You’ll get one on one condition.”
Twilight swallowed. “W-what’s that?”
“You accept your punishment now, and don’t complain.”
Twilight stared at her. It was pretty clear what Celestia was about to do to her poor undefended rump. Some small, very small part of Twilight was actually looking forward to this, the rest of her realized that Celestia’s hoof was probably burning hot right now and would leave actual scalding marks on her flank. A kiss was nice, but this was more than she could cope with.
Twilight buried her head into her pillow. “Please… don’t hurt me.”
Something hot slapped Twilight’s rear causing her to yelp and jerk forward. Surprisingly, it didn’t hurt though. It was hot, certainly but it was just surprising and not painful. Now free from Celestia’s aura and with Rainbow Dash gone, Twilight laid there, rump sticking up in the air and Celestia’s hoof brushing her flank, circling her cutie mark. Celestia was looking directly into Twilight’s eyes. “You really thought I was going to spank you didn’t you?”
Twilight swallowed. “Um… yes.”
“You and I both fully realize that if I were to spank you when angry, I might just break your hips with my sheer strength by itself. Not to mention the burn marks I’d leave.” She laughed. “No, I’ll find a more fitting punishment for you since you’re so unwilling to take this one.” She stood up and walked away.
Twilight stared at her as the door opened. “D-don’t I get a kiss?”
Celestia looked back and smiled. “You didn’t accept your punishment, so no. You can sit there and be frustrated all by yourself in your room. In fact you’re grounded. No leaving this room until dinner time.”
As Celestia left and closed the door behind her, Twilight began to realize just how turned on she was, and how Celestia had just left her to be there all alone. No kissing, no more touching, only herself and a hoof and a need for somepony to touch her… oh, this was a punishment far worse than any other Celestia could have done.
Twilight tried to teleport out of the room and realized to her sudden horror that her horn was not working. Her magic had been cut off… she groaned as she buried her head into her pillow. “Noooo, not my magic too!”
About ten minutes after being locked in her room, Twilight had had quite enough of this. She’d already read through one of the old textbooks about the evil sorcerers from the Lands of Lush Green Plants and Snow. Honestly, they put her current evil self to shame, but they were gone now so it was okay. Having finished that book it just left her feeling like some kind of filly.
This was insulting. What did Celestia think she was; a foal? Now that some of her fear and desire had cooled down she was left with a bitter taste in her mouth. Her magic may have been gone and her door was locked but she would find a way out. One good thing Celestia had done was teach Twilight how to get out of any situation, even in a situation should she lose the use of her horn. Now the only question was, how would she break out this time?
***
Applejack and Rarity made sure that nopony was there to bother them as they carefully, quietly opened the door leading to Luna’s chambers. Going inside proved a hazard as it was so dark neither of them could see. If Fluttershy was going batty again she was probably used to the darkness, but Rarity had to create a small orb of light above her head so the two of them could close the door and make their way to Luna’s bed. Both of them took a side of the bed and just as they climbed on Rarity turned the light off.
Luna was certainly in the middle, and Rarity could tell just how much larger she was than Fluttershy by feel alone. As Rarity climbed under the covers she inched closer to Luna wrapped a leg around Luna’s barrel only to find another leg there from Applejack. A small nervous laugh escaped the two of them.
Luna stirred a little. “Mmm Fluttershy, is that… Rarity?”
Rarity couldn’t think but she didn’t need to. “I’m not the only one my love.”
Applejack’s voice came out a little sheepishly. “Howdy.”
Luna rolled over taking them by surprise and laying on her back she wrapped a wing around each of them dragging them into a close embrace. Her wings covered their entire bodies, the tips of those wings finding cutie marks to stroke. Even though Rarity couldn’t see a thing she could feel the warm gaze of her new lover upon her. She was sure the blush on her face was obvious even to Luna.
Rarity and Applejack had never invited a third party to bed with them before, though they had considered Twilight once or twice. Only because the mare was so persistent with wanting another sleepover. In fact they had planned to say yes the very next time she asked, which probably wouldn’t have taken longer than a week. The marriage came first and so that little adventure would have to wait.
A pair of lips met with Rarity’s and she kissed back. It was a little like trying to make out with Big Mac, not that she would ever admit she knew what that was like. Only the face was a bit more slender, soft, and gentle. Rarity slid her hoof across Luna’s chest and down the mare’s barrel once more. Once they pulled away she heard the sounds of kissing from the other side as Luna must have found Applejack.
Applejack’s hoof made its way down to where Rarity’s was and they wrapped around each other holding one another’s hooves. “Luna, my dear, you are so good at kissing.”
Luna spoke quietly. “I am the Princess of Passion. Kissing is only a small part of what I am truly capable of.”
The door handle made a small noise as it moved. Then it rattled some before stopping. Oh no Fluttershy, not this time, Rarity had locked the door. Luna was all theirs and would simply have to wait for their turn to be done. Rarity found herself kissing Luna again. Even without sight she could sense Applejack moving over Luna’s body, her hoof reaching over and wrapping around Luna’s side.
Luna’s tongue was meeting with Rarity’s and the flavor was simply indescribable. It was like tasting the stars in the night sky, and she could feel energy pouring into her from the kiss. As the kiss drew on and Luna began to moan through it, she began to feel a little underskilled. Luna was just a fantastic kisser, and Rarity could not keep up. In fact she had to pull away to breathe.
With another moan escaping Luna’s lips Rarity had to wonder where Applejack had gone. She reached out to feel for her apple pie and felt something round and firm on Luna’s chest. Oh… that was Applejack’s butt… well, Rarity assumed Luna was probably at least a little hungry and decided that she could help lift that tail out of the way with her hoof as she made her way kissing along Luna’s neck.
She could feel Luna’s head moving, going toward the sweetest spot on all of Applejack when the door rattled again. Followed by a stern knock. They ignored it and continued on. Rarity was not giving up this time. No matter who was there.
The door was surrounded in a golden aura and lifted off its hinges and placed inside. Rarity stared back at the doorway where Celestia stood like a symbol of light, purity, and stern decisiveness.
Luna looked over the top of Applejack’s rump, her mouth perhaps a little too preoccupied to greet her sister properly. Celestia took one look at the three of them, let out a sigh, and then asked. “Is Twilight in there with any of you?”
Rarity being the only one with a freely available mouth spoke for the group. “I would certainly hope not, unless she wanted to join in?” there was a small hope that a purple alicorn would suddenly appear beside them. When that didn’t happen she shrugged. “Then no, I suppose not.”
Celestia lifted the door up again and replaced it. After that, Rarity and Applejack were free to continue to their heart’s desire. Luna was at long last, theirs.
***
Celestia, thoroughly embarrassed seeing her sister involved with two of their brides, had to suppress the imagery of what would happen if she joined them. It was like trying to stop a flood with a pebble. If only she didn’t have to be responsible she would go straight back there and join in the festivities. Of course she had come to a much more frightening conclusion.
After leaving Twilight alone for Twenty minutes she began to realize maybe she shouldn’t have abandoned Twilight without any magic at the very least. What she found was a door wide open with a bobby pin and a screwdriver shoved into the lock. How had Celestia forgotten that she taught Twilight to pick locks for ironically just this kind of situation?
Now she had a highly inappropriate, unstable, and potentially dangerous bride and former student on the loose up to who knows what? One that was now thinking of their friends as lesser than her. Seriously, had they broken Twilight Sparkle already? They didn’t even consummate the marriage yet.
Not that Celestia wanted to break Twilight… per se.
Still this proved to be a threat and she needed to find her captain of the guard immediately. Wind Fury was out running patrols, so she was going to her ex captain, one here specifically for this situation. She found Shining Armor in his office with Spike sitting on the desk. The two of them were reading comics.
Shining Armor looked up. “Princess Celestia, how are you doing?”
She walked in, closed the door behind her and took a seat on the floor. “It’s happened.”
He stared at her. “What happened?”
“Twilight’s lost it.”
He blinked. “N-now hold up, if this is about what happened to our parents… well Spike was there, he heard the whole thing. Sure Twilight said some awful stuff but they also said something that was really… I’m not sure how to process it honestly. They’re still my parents but I don’t think Twilight’s going to forgive them anytime soon.”
Celestia shook her head. “I already know about that. I scolded her but I agree, and if I’m allowed to be frank for a moment, there is a reason I took Twilight away and didn’t give her back for so many years. She’s not some weapon to be used, or a monster to fear, she is a pony with a heart and feelings and an unstable mind.”
Shining Armor blinked. “Then if that’s not why you’re here… what’s going on?”
“She called herself Midnight Sparkle, threatened to destroy the entire castle if I didn’t kiss her and is thinking of her friends less as ponies and more as toys to play with.”
Shining Armor swallowed. “Oh… okay. So she hasn’t changed her hair color, caught on fire, or actually destroyed the castle yet?”
“She also has no magic, I took it away to punish her.”
Spike face palmed. “Great, so she’s crazy, and now without magic. I think that might actually be worse somehow.”
A cold laughter echoed all around them in the small office. “Hoohoohoo.”
Spike’s eyes widened. “NO!”
Shining Armor stood up. “We need to leave.”
Celestia went to the door but even though the handle was turning, it wouldn’t budge. With a flicker of magic she teleported herself out of the room and into the hall. An iron anvil sat in front of the door blocking it. “H-how?”
Blue smoke began to crawl out from the bottom of the door. Celestia’s horn lit up and the anvil moved aside with a loud screech leaving marks on the marble floor. The door was flung open and she saw Shining Armor and Spike lying face down on the desk, unconscious as blue smoke poured in from the vents on the floor. With a golden aura around them she brought them out and teleported all three to Cadance’s chambers where the mare was hard at work at the desk writing up what she assumed were the wedding plans.
Dropping the two sleeping boys on the bed Cadance jolted from the sound. “Celestia?” Her eyes darted to the two unconscious ones. “Shining Armor!”
Celestia cut her off. “He’s asleep, he’s fine. Twilight’s snapped and I can’t find her. She just used a sleep bomb of some sort on them, and attempted to use it on me too.”
Cadance stood up. “This isn’t good. We need to stop her, but without involving the guard, and without letting any pony know something is the matter.”
Celestia nodded. “I agree. After we restrain her, and placate her, I’ll just marry her tomorrow and be down with the madness.”
Cadance nodded as well. “We’ll stop her, and safely too… for both of your sakes.”
Celestia offered a nervous smile. “Thank you.”
***
Luna lay in bed with two very exhausted, very satisfied mares in her wings. Today was truly a great day, even if she was feeling sleep deprived. This experience was one she hadn’t had in many, many years. Two beautiful, tiny mares snuggled up against her side, damp fur cool against her own, and feeling far more satisfied than anypony had any right to feel. This was her domain, her lust, her love.
She also recalled Celestia’s earlier interruption. Her poor, poor sister. Teleporting several wild animals into her room when they were all riled up and smelly was perhaps the last thing Celestia should have done. So Luna’s gift in return was to let Celestia have her hooves full with a wild and unpredictable Twilight Sparkle.
It wasn’t hard to manipulate a pony’s mind. What she did wasn’t challenging at all, in fact she didn’t even do much to begin with. Twilight’s mind was already fractured, and seemed to have been for many more years than Luna could be sure of. The recent stresses she endured seemed to have pushed the poor thing over the edge into insanity.
All Luna had to do was pull a piece of Twilight that had existed for a brief moment out from that darkness and give it a little bit of power. A little bit of doubt. A little bit of control. Hence Twilight would now go around like a crazy pony and probably act a fool. Luna laughed to herself imagining how silly Twilight must have been.
A bone chilling laugh sounded in her room. “Hoo hoo hoo.”
Luna looked around and she didn't see anything or anypony. The voice sounded a little familiar. “Who dares interrupt Luna’s sleeping time?”
Twilight’s voice came from all around her. “I see these two have been very naughty, taking my Princess of Night away from me. I agreed to let my pet Fluttershy share, but not these two.”
Luna was quiet a moment. “Do… do you not want to share me?”
Twilight cackled. “Why in Equestria would somepony as great as I am share with such low lives? No, I think they need to be punished for their sins against their goddess of friendship.”
A white cloud of power exploded into the room from the vents and Luna was too slow in reacting as her and her new lovers were covered in the stuff. The voice cackled with laughter as it grew distant. Luna lay there for a moment wondering what the powder was. It didn’t seem to hurt them, and nopony was reacting to it.
Her hooves were a bit itchy though… actually so were her legs, and her belly, back, neck and face. Every ounce of Luna’s body was itching like crazy now. The two mares beside her had woken up and were rolling around scratching themselves senseless with their hooves. It was then that Luna realized what had been done. Twilight must have broken into the royal vault of pranking, and stolen the itching powder. Clever, clever and very, very annoying.
Maybe Luna actually went too far with this prank after all.
Pinkie Pie found herself walking the halls with Cadance by her side. They were going over details of the wedding. Even if Pinkie respected that a surprise party wasn’t a surprise if she knew everything about it, she still wanted to go over some suggestions, including the cake she had in mind to bake. Cadance was one hundred percent behind the idea as well.
“Pinkie, that cake sounds amazing. I’m sure something like that will calm everypony’s nerves and make Celestia and Luna both want you all the more.”
Pinkie Pie grinned. “I’m a simple mare with only a few simple goals in mind. I want to finish my make out bingo. I want to bake cakes. I want to become a Pinkie sandwich between Celestia and Luna, and I want to plan parties for the rest of our eternities together.”
Cadance smiled. “Sounds like you have it all figured out.”
“I know, and I’m the only one right? All the others are acting c-r-a-z-y.”
“Well can you really blame them? A wedding is just so exciting!”
Pinkie Pie giggled. “Yeppers, but they got to realize like, we’re all getting married to each other. So like… we’ll all be getting some princess action in due time. Can we just be patient?”
Cadance laughed as well. “Apparently not.”
They came to Cadance’s bedroom where she had most of her plans as far as Pinkie could tell. Pinkie wasn’t here to steal any plans but she was here to help out. Apparently Twilight had gone off the deep end, but Pinkie wasn’t worried. Twilight didn’t even have any magic, what were a few pranks going to really do to ponies?
They opened the door and Pinkie saw a copy of herself on the bed. Shining Armor was right behind her and moving his hips as the Pinkie on the bed was giving a most satisfied look to them. She even waved at them.
Pinkie Pie glanced up at Cadance who was staring slack jawed at the event happening on the bed. “Um… C-Cadance, you know that’s not really me there right?”
Cadance shut her mouth. “Pinkie, please be quiet.”
Pinkie Pie put a hoof to her mouth and zipped her lips. Even she wasn’t crazy enough to make this situation any worse. Instead she followed Cadance into the room. Cadance walked up to the bed, pulled her hoof back, and swung it at the Pinkie on the bed. Her hoof went right through and the illusion flickered before fading completely.
With the sinful illusion broken, it was revealed that Shining Armor and Spike were still on the bed mercifully passed out. Cadance growled as she whirled round and saw somepony in the corner of the room. Pinkie looked over and saw somepony she didn’t expect. Trixie Lulamoon, the great and powerful magician was there. She had been tied to a chair, her eyes were strained and she was staring at them with wide eyes.
Cadance took a step toward the captive magician and Trixie pleaded. “Trixie is sorry! She was forced to do this, if she didn’t her cape and hat were going to be burned. Trixie’s mom made those for her!”
Cadance continued walking toward her. She reached out with a hoof and Trixie flinched. “You’re not supposed to be here until tomorrow.”
She undid the rope keeping the stage mare tied to the chair and Trixie leapt forward. “Trixie knows this, she was coming early to speak with you about what would be the most appropriate magic tricks to celebrate the marriages for the rulers of Equestria. She did not expect to be foalnapped by a crazy purple unicorn wearing all black.”
Cadance raised an eye. “Unicorn?”
“Yes, she had a horn, but did not use any magic on Trixie. She had a black one piece suit, it made her look like some kind of spy.”
Cadance let out a sigh. “I’m sorry you got caught up in this. Apparently, there’s a prank war going on?”
Trixie’s ears folded back and she took several steps back. “No, not another one.”
Pinkie Pie jumped in between them. “You’ve been in one?”
“Yes, and it ended horribly for everypony involved. Prank wars only escalate until nothing is left. If possible this needs to be stopped before the wedding or there may not be a castle left to have Trixie perform in!”
Pinkie Pie grinned. “Gotcha, I didn’t expect you to be here though.”
Cadance looked down at the mare. “You were the one who suggested I get a stage magician and my only two options were her, or her dad. Honestly, I think Trixie is prettier so…”
Pinkie laughed. “She’s also not going to flirt with all the brides.”
“That too.”
“Excuse Trixie,” Trixie stated. “She is far superior to her old man, and her skills for illusions far exceed his.”
Cadance nodded. “Yeah, they do. You actually even got the smell of sex in there somehow in addition to the sound of the bed springs with that spell.”
“If Trixie couldn’t be perfect her mementos were going to be burned… please don’t let them be burned.”
A hatch opened up in the ceiling and a package came falling from the ceiling before closing again. It read, ‘for the stuck up know it all, you know the one that’s not me’.
Pinkie Pie giggled. “Well at least she’s self aware.”
Trixie sighed as she opened it. Inside were her trademarked cape and hat. “Well at the very least Trixie got her attire back. She will return to her room and practice there with the door barricaded. Please let her know when this war is over.”
With that Trixie turned tail and trotted out of the room. Pinkie Pie laughed. “This is only just starting to get fun. We got Trixie involved.”
Cadance frowned. “That’s my concern. Also… did you know there was a secret entrance in the ceiling?”
Pinkie Pie shrugged. “I usually find them by mistake. I’m sure Twilight did all this like, super duper research and stuff to find them.”
Cadance nodded. “We should look for the others as quickly as we can.”
A trio of screams sounded from down the hall as the sounds of a venerable stampede could be heard. Both Pinkie and Cadance stuck their heads out of the door and saw Luna, Rarity, and Applejack galloping down the hall. They were all covered in a white powder and screaming as they ran. Nothing was chasing them but they looked frightened to the point of mania.
They took a quick turn and ran through a door leading to one of the ‘oh too many baths’ Celestia had in the castle. Pinkie Pie giggled. “Itching powder, nice one, Twi.”
“Itching powder? Oh come on?” Cadance shook her head. “I don’t think Twilight is thinking these through, she could have gotten me to kill you.”
Pinkie Pie waved a hoof. “Oh you couldn’t kill me. Maybe hurt me, but killing me is really, really hard to do. Even Twilight failed and left one of me alive, she’s living in Manehatten now as a detective.”
Cadance stared at her. “I… I’m just glad you’re on our side.”
Pinkie Pie bounced into the hall. “Come on, I have a feeling I know where she’s going next. It’s the same place I’d go if I was her.”
***
Rainbow Dash had done this at least a couple times before. Not nearly with this much aggressiveness though. Finding herself quickly on her back with a yellow and pink mess on top of her she was unable to resist Fluttershy’s mouth as it consumed her own. Oddly enough, the honey flavor Fluttershy usually had was so mixed in with the flavor of apples she had to pause and register who was on top of her.
She also didn’t know why Fluttershy was on top of her. Honestly Rainbow Dash just came into the kitchen to get a bite to eat. She needed a snack and a nap. Being sexually mauled by the oversexed pegasus was probably the last thing she really wanted.
In fact, she didn’t really want this at all right then. She pushed Fluttershy off of her and shook herself clear of the fog in her head. “Oh my Celestia. Will everypony just stop for two seconds! Not all of us want to hump ourselves to death.”
Fluttershy blinked at her. “Rainbow Dash?”
“Don’t you ‘rainbow dash’ me!” She snapped. “I just came in here for some food.”
“You were eating apples.”
“Yes, yes I was, and I wanted another one.” Rainbow Dash looked around and saw that the apples were all dried out husks or complete cores. “Dang… so I guess Twilight did give me the last one.”
Fluttershy leaned forward. “I need more apples. You smell like an apple. You tasted like an apple.”
Rainbow Dash swallowed as she took note of the slit pupils, the sharp fangs, the bat-like wings and the extra fluff on Fluttershy’s chest and rump. “Oh… crabapples, your Flutterbat again aren’t you?”
Fluttershy licked her lips, making sure to lick her sharp teeth. “More, apples.”
Rainbow Dash didn’t have to be warned twice. She fled into the hall she came from and down it as fast as she could. Not too surprisingly Fluttershy was close on her tail. A mad look in her eyes. This was not how Rainbow dash was losing her virginity.
She took a sharp turn and saw it only seconds too late. Twilight was standing there with a bucket in her forelegs. She threw it forward splashing Rainbow Dash with a sweet sticky liquid that caused her swerve out of control and hit a wall. Rainbow Dash stopped long enough to pick herself back up and taste the sweetness on her lips. Apple cider…
The next moment she was tackled to the ground with Fluttershy sitting on her back and using a hot slimy tongue to lick the apple cider off of her fur. Twilight stood some distance away. She was wearing a black stealth suit that was not made for alicorns so her wings were underneath it and bulging out of the sides. A wicked grin spread across her lips. “Feed my pet, you may have Rainbow Dash, and I, I will have Celestia!”
She cackled madly before taking the stealth suit off revealing the black sexy dress beneath. She then slid into the ventilation shaft as if she was coated in butter. Once gone Rainbow Dash was left attempting to struggle against a surprisingly strong Fluttershy who was busy licking the back of her head.
“Well… great.”
Rainbow Dash was at least happy that despite being mounted in the hallway with about as much dignity as a mare of the night living in a brothel, she could at least be content with the fact that this was not sexual for Fluttershy. She was honestly just licking her clean from the sticky cider. Any and all potential dry humping was surely accidental.
At least that’s what Rainbow Dash told herself for the five minutes she was forced to lay there while Fluttershy did her thing and made her way slowly down to the lower back of Rainbow Dash. Rainbow Dash was finally getting worried that maybe Fluttershy wasn’t going to stop anywhere polite.
She bucked and kicked only to receive a hiss followed by a painful bite on her flank. Those teeth sure did smart. Rainbow dash called out. “Anypony there? I kind of need help?”
Pinkie Pie and Cadance came rounding the corner. Pinkie Pie was laughing. “Looks like you’re getting a nice hot bath.”
“Haha, very funny, now please get her off of me before she starts licking something that I don’t want licked.”
Cadance’s horn lit up and Fluttershy was dragged, kicking and hissing off of Rainbow Dash. Once free all Rainbow Dash could feel was absolutely disgusting. She was covered in cider, and saliva… and really needed a bath.
Pinkie Pie smiled. “Well I guess she was be-cider self when she saw you.”
Rainbow Dash growled. “Pinkie, no. Just no. All of my no. I’ve had enough with these horny wives of mine today.”
Cadance smiled. “Fiancés, Rainbow Dash, you’re not married yet.”
Rainbow Dash glared at her. “Even Celestia was getting way too into kissing me. Like, seriously, I know how awesome I am, but come on, some moderation ponies!”
Pinkie Pie laughed.
Cadance offered a weak smile.
Rainbow Dash shook her head. “So, Twilight’s officially gone off the deep end…”
Cadance replied, “Yeah and we need to find her, and fix her before the wedding tomorrow. She foalnapped the entertainer of all things.”
Rainbow Dash looked up at them. “Um… it might be too late now, but she did mention she was going after Celestia…”
Celestia had searched high and low in the castle searching for her renegade fiancé and former student only to find no sign nor trace of her. She knew teaching Twilight all of the secret passageways was a mistake. For the sun’s sake, Twilight even knew of the entrances that Luna didn’t know. So finding her was going to be impossible.
The best she could hope for was that Twilight would show up and make a mistake. Once she did they would catch her and that would be that. At this point from the screams of terror, the galloping of hooves and one poor terrified magician that reported she would not come back out of her room until tomorrow, Celestia was less mad and more terrified.
It was her fault. She did this to Twilight. Pushed her so far with this marriage to multiple ponies that it had broken her. For her sake she had prayed that after the marriage things would calm down and Twilight would steadily return to normal but now she could see it clear as her sun on a bright summer day. Twilight was lost to madness. She might have bouts of clarity in the future but she would never, ever return to her as the innocent, happy, and studious creature she had cared so deeply for.
If only Twilight would return to her she would marry her. She would give Twilight the best wedding, the best honeymoon, and the most magic filled wedding night ever. If only her student could return to her sanity and be hers once more she would do this, for Twilight.
Alas, at this point she could see a future where Twilight chose to live like a hermit inside their walls. Pranking them when they least expected it. Stealing food and other random items to build shrines dedicated to Princess Celestia. The wedding could be cancelled but the castle may need to be abandoned after a few years of dealing with Twilight’s shenanigans.
She shook her head slowly as she entered her room. Without her magic, Twilight wouldn’t even be able to defend herself. She’d become a myth, a ghost story. Hundreds of years from now ponies would tell stories of the old haunted castle in Canterlot where an evil mare lived to play pranks on those that came inside. The mare once known as the Princess of Friendship and now known as the Ghost Princess of Canterlot.
Celestia’s head sank lower. Closed the door behind her and made her way to her bed. She climbed up onto it and laid down. This was it. She had finally done it. If only she had just told her sister the first night that this was a mistake, maybe Twilight would still be with her, still be okay…
A gentle hoof stroked Celestia’s leg. She looked up expecting to see Rainbow Dash, or maybe even Pinkie Pie there to greet her. Instead there sat Twilight, a confused look on her face.
“TWILIGHT!” Celestia cried as she sat up and threw her legs around the mare dragging her into an embrace.
Twilight nuzzled in. “Oh, Celestia… I was worried you’d still be mad at me. And then all of my hard work would be for naught.”
Celestia shook her head. “You are the most important pony to me right now, I’m not mad at you at all, I’m worried about you.”
“You are?”
“Of course I am.”
Twilight began to shiver in her embrace. It was only at that moment Celestia felt something a little off. There was a cold energy coming from Twilight. Reaching out into the aether to feel the magic coming from Twilight’s being she saw it. There was a dark energy around Twilight’s head, a familiar darkness. Not malevolent, in fact it was playful, but it was playfully dangerous. Celestia reached out and removed it.
The moment she did she could hear a voice playing in the back of her mind in Luna’s voice saying, ‘gotcha’. The moment it was gone Twilight collapsed into Celestia’s embrace. Her eyes closed, and breathing deeply. She was asleep. She began to question how long Twilight had been sleeping for? The spell she saw around Twilight’s mind was one very unique to Luna. It brought out parts of the subconscious, gave them power and usually resulted in a sort of waking dream for ponies where they wouldn’t be quite in control of themselves and may act very strangely indeed.
This prank war had gone too far. Celestia was going to put an end to it like a mature and responsible mare before anymore damage was caused. She laid Twilight down and covered her up before kissing the mare on the forehead. She made a promise to herself and she was going to keep it.
For now Twilight needed rest. She went to the door and opened just as a group of ponies slid to a stop in front of it. Luna, Cadance, Pinkie Pie and even Rainbow Dash were there. They looked behind Celestia and saw Twilight peacefully asleep. Celestia smiled at them. “I have caught her and helped stabilize her mind.” She looked at Luna directly. “You, my room, now.”
Luna swallowed and walked forward. Celestia looked at the others. “You may all return to your regular duties. We shall see you tonight for dinner.”
With that said the others left and Celestia closed the door. She could tell they were concerned but she left no room for questions as she was fairly quick to shut the door on them. She had to speak with Luna and stop this mess.
Just as the door closed Luna spoke. “I’m sorry.”
Celestia blinked. “You are?”
“I am, I did not mean for things to get so out of hoof. I expected Twilight to act like a foal but not cause so much chaos. It was wrong of me to do that to her, and I apologize.”
Celestia bit her lower lip. “I am sorry as well. I helped push this prank war of ours into some pretty unfriendly territory.”
Luna sniffled. “I… I’m so sorry.”
Celestia froze. “Luna, please, don’t cry.”
Luna looked back, her eyes were glossy and wet. “I love them, I love them all so much. I thought that with this old law of yours I could have them all and not have to pick any one above the others. Now I realize I may have misjudged… Twilight spoke truth when she said she was unwilling to share… perhaps… Perhaps I made a mistake. I shall never have the loving family I wanted with these mares and I have only caused them pain, and torment.”
Celestia reached out with a wing. “Sister, the last time I was married was over five hundred years ago to a gentle kind hearted stallion, Time Turner is his name. Though I think he’s changed it to something simpler now. That was the last time I opened up my heart like this but having had so many mares so attracted to me, so in love I began to crave their affection much like you. I love how Rarity looks beautiful even when all has gone wrong and how she is willing to be so generous with herself, her love, and her time. I love how Pinkie Pie can bake, can always make me smile, and can bring such joy to my Twilight’s lips. Rainbow Dash’s willingness to learn something new and spend time just getting to know me is much more than I could have hoped for.
“Most of all, Twilight. I love Twilight and the more I’ve gotten close to her, the more I realize that I want her, need her in my life more than just as a platonic partner, but rather I want her in a much more intimate light.”
Luna sniffled. “S-so…”
“So you have made me think about possibilities I had not considered.”
Luna wiped a hoof at her eyes, wiping away the tears beading up in the corners. “So?”
“So I still have some time to think, and think I will. Tonight, let’s have a wonderful full dinner with everypony and enjoy their company. Tomorrow we have a big day regardless of whether we decide to go through with the wedding or not.” Celestia said this but she already knew the answer in her heart. These six ponies had brought so much excitement, warmth and comfort to her these past few days. If she had known that all it would take was getting married to a few too many mares, she may have thought of this plan herself ages ago.
Luna nodded. “I still need to apologize to Twilight. It was wrong of me to manipulate her mind like that.”
Twilight’s voice came out of the blue. “Yes, yes it was. I just wanted help to not feel bad about breaking all of Celestia’s stuff again and the next thing I know, I’m in bed and my head feels like there's a drill going into each side of my skull and they are meeting in the middle.”
Luna looked over. “My apologies. I only meant to… I don’t even know.”
Celestia offered. “To win a prank war that is now over and done with.”
Luna nodded. “Precisely.”
Celestia let out a sigh. “Well, to be fair, laws are still laws and as the rulers of Equestria we do need to follow them to the best of our ability unless doing so would destroy Equestria.” In this case, she also realized that not getting married meant it may destroy the Elements of Harmony which would in turn destroy Equestria.
Luna smiled. “Understood. I shall see the two of you at dinner then. I… have to take a nap beforehoof.”
With that Celestia let Luna leave and then returned to the bed where Twilight was sitting. Celestia took a seat next to the mare and watched as she winced from the pain in her head. A golden glow surrounded two points on Twilight’s forehead, rubbing small circles on her temple. Twilight’s face eased.
“How are you feeling?”
“Like the one time I tried drinking alcohol.”
Celestia laughed. “Well, at least you can make jokes.”
Twilight opened an eye. “Celestia… do you really love me?”
“Of course I do.”
“N-no, I mean like… not just as a student, or an adopted daughter, but as a lover.”
Celestia bit her lower lip. That question had come up far too many times in the past few days. Now she was staring at Twilight after having suffered from a few too many mental breaks and a mind warping spell. She could lie, and Twilight would surely accept it. However, Celestia was sick of lying. It really wasn’t something she enjoyed and if she was going to get hitched to Twilight at some point she couldn’t keep it up.
“I don’t know.”
Twilight winced, but this time Celestia doubted it was from physical pain.
Celestia clarified. “I don’t know, Twilight. As you said, some part of me still views you as my daughter, and it probably always will. These past few days have taught me much about how much you’ve grown, and what you really need now as you continue to grow and mature.” She reached out with a hoof and stroked Twilights’ flank. “I also keep finding myself looking at you, or thinking of you in ways that are far too inappropriate for a mentor. These thoughts are not likely to vanish any time soon, and I can’t continue blaming Cadance for them.”
Twilight looked at her. “I… I don’t think I understand.”
Celestia gave her a patient smile. “It means I think you are very attractive and if you weren’t getting married to me tomorrow I might just throw you down on the bed and to quote something you said earlier, fill you up with my love.”
Twilight’s cheeks turned beet red. “Um… I mean… um…”
Celestia gave Twilight a kiss on the cheek. “I would still rather wait until our wedding night, where I can tear that dress off of you properly. Rarity may be upset with the state I leave the dress in.”
Twilight eeped and stayed quiet, but the smile on her lips was genuine. Was this creepy and weird and all sorts of wrong; yes. Was it also something Celestia was planning to do regardless; probably. Was Celestia going to just try and forget that this was essentially her daughter in front of her that she wanted to deflower with as much force as a solar flare; yes, yes she was.
At least when it came to Luna, that mare did not have the same level of concern for such things. Yet, it felt like it had finally sank through Luna’s thick skull that maybe this whole affair was a disaster, and only barely functioning as it was.
Well even so, Celestia was just happy to have her Twilight back with her now. Not to mention her phoenix just came in through her window and from here she could see that it was holding a scroll in its talons. With a bit of magic she levitated it over and read it. It was just a number, a simple number that could mean anything but she knew exactly what it meant and now that number weighed more heavily than it ever had before.
Luna retired to her room but quickly found she wasn’t alone in here. There were three ponies in here with her. Rarity, Applejack, and then being held down between the two of them a very bat-like and upset Fluttershy. Fluttershy was hissing at the two and judging but the fang marks on each of them, they’d had a hard fight dragging her into here.
Rarity spoke first. “Luna, my moon, please help. She is growing out of control and will not stop lusting after Applejack as if she was some kind of prized salmon.”
Applejack nodded. “Ah’d already been licked by half mah friends in the past few days, AH’d like to at least stop the biting.”
Luna chuckled to herself. “My apologies, Fluttershy. I suppose it’s been so long I forgot that the more intimate I become with a pony the higher chance they have of evolving into something greater than before. Honestly, my sister should help balance that out with the rest of you but Fluttershy has scarcely left my side the last few days.”
Her horn lit up and Fluttershy was wrapped up in a blue aura. Her wings began to look more feathery than before. Her fangs shrunk. Her eyes returned to normal and she stopped hissing. Once she looked more or less normal again Fluttershy eeped.
Rarity and Applejack got off of her and Fluttershy stood up. Her face was turning so red she looked almost like the words most adorable pimple. “Applejack, Rarity… I’m sorry.”
Fluttershy stood up and walked herself out of the bedroom. With that done Luna looked at the other two. “Do you two wish to stay?”
Applejack and Rarity both gave each other nervous glances. Rarity spoke. “Well, we might want to um… create a balance between our two beautiful brides. Isn’t that right darling?”
Applejack nodded. “Ah’ll be honest. Ah can’t become a batpony because Ah fear Ah might try to eat myself… maybe Ah’m more scared AH’ll succeed.”
Rarity added. “That sounds like the kind of trick only Pinkie Pie could pull off… I might be interested in watching.”
Applejack marched to the door and walked out. “Nope.”
Rarity let out a sigh. “I suppose I’ll just have to ask Pinkie Pie to show me how she does that later.” She smiled at Luna. “Please do get some good rest, after all you’ve been through because of our shenanigans, you deserve it.”
Luna watched her leave and shut the door behind her. Knowing that those three really cared for her made her heart flutter. She wasn’t sure if she’d get any sleep after such displays of affection. Even though she laid in bed, and her eyes closed, she was sure that all she could do was think about how much those ponies loved her. It wasn’t like she was going to… fall… asleep.
***
Rainbow Dash was leaning back on her cloud covered balcony and overlooking the sunset. From her view here she saw the moon as it began to rise and the sun as it began to fall. Stars were only just now beginning to sparkle to life in the sky far above. She let out a sigh of relief as she finally found a quiet moment to herself.
Three balconies down she saw Fluttershy standing there looking out over the sunset. She looked normal again, well she was still wearing the pink collar that Luna had gotten her but she looked like a pegasus again. Rainbow Dash called over. “Hey, Fluttershy, you good?”
Fluttershy looked at her, her face turned red and she stuttered something in reply but Rainbow Dash couldn’t hear her. “Sorry, what was that? You have to speak up when you’re like sixty feet away from me.”
Fluttershy moved her mouth again but Rainbow Dash caught none of it. “Fluttershy, I’m too lazy to go over there, I’m just going to assume you're okay.”
Rarity came out of her room onto the balcony next to Fluttershy’s and yelled back. “She said she’s sorry about trying to eat you.”
Rainbow Dash snickered. “Tell her it’s all good.”
Rarity pouted. “She can hear ‘you’ just fine.”
“Then why does she need you to yell at me?”
Applejack came out of the room next to Rainbow Dash’s. “Because, Shy ain’t too loud you know.”
Twilight flew in from above them to land on her own personal balcony at the very end explaining as she did. “Just because you can create enough volume with your voice to carry your yelling to Fluttershy does not mean that Fluttershy can’t hear you. She is just incapable of creating the vocalizations needed for such loud sounds herself.”
Rainbow Dash watched as Twilight turned to face them. “Hey, Twilight, you gonna be staying in your room tonight?”
Twilight shouted back, causing Fluttershy to flinch. “Of course, it’s the night before my wedding night and it would be improper for me to sleep in my wife’s bed. In fact she isn’t supposed to see me after dinner tonight at all until the wedding. I will be implementing invisibility spells to assure this as to not cause any bad luck.”
Rainbow dash laughed. “Since when did you believe in bad luck?”
Twilight called back. “Since I found out I was getting married to you.”
Pinkie Pie popped her head out. She was not in fact on her own balcony but instead on Rainbow Dash’s and holding a bingo card that had all of the eight brides faces on it, even hers. “Oooohhhhh, sick burn!”
Twilight called out. “I did no such thing. I merely made a playful jest, I did no burning of any sort.”
Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes. She studied the bingo card and noticed that Pinkie had an X on there for everypony on it except for Rainbow Dash. She even had a mark for herself. “Uh, what’s that for?”
Pinkie Pie looked at it. “It’s my bingo card, if I win I get something special. I really want to win. I actually started this card months ago, and had to travel to Manehattan to get the mark for myself.”
Rainbow Dash laughed. “Neat, so you’re trying to get my mark now? What do I need to do, stamp it or something?”
Her ears folded back. “Well… kinda yeah. I didn’t want to bother you with this, but then I realized I could get something really good if I win.”
“What do you get?”
Pinkie Pie smiled. “Well Discord said I get to have a happily ever after, though he didn’t say everypony else would get one.”
Rainbow Dash groaned. “Great, so it’s a weird game you’re playing with him. Got it.”
“He said it would be physically impossible for me to win. I think it’s because of the mark for myself but then I realized… he was talking about you.”
Rainbow Dash stared at her. “So, if I help you win, I’m basically beating him at his own game.”
She nodded.
“Cool, what do I do?”
Pinkie Pie smiled. “Just sit there and close your eyes.”
Rainbow Dash did as instructed. She couldn't wait to get one up on Discord, the expression he made when he lost at a game of chance was always priceless. When she felt Pinkie’s lips meet hers and her eyes opened wide she stared at Pinkie who was now busy kissing her. Pinkie Pie pulled back and grinned. “Thanks.” She then marked an X on the card and it lifted up into the air and vanished.
Rainbow Dash looked back down at Pinkie only to find she was missing, she looked over from her sun chair and realized Pinkie was now on her own balcony now staring up at the sky. “I… you know what, at least you’re not trying to hump me.”
Pinkie Pie giggled. “That’s for after we’re married silly. All these ponies trying to move too fast and beat the game before it even starts. I swear, half of you are speedrunners.”
Rarity replied. “Marriage is not a game, Pinkie.”
Pinkie waved a hoof. “Sure it is, and I plan to be the bestest at it. I already got major scores from Celestia for being able to make cake.”
Rarity shouted back. “You’ve been trying to sleep with Luna too!”
Pinkie Pie looked way across at her and blinked a few times. “Nuh-uh, trying implies I didn’t already succeed.”
Rarity began stammering something and Rainbow Dash laughed. Out of all of them Pinkie was oftentimes the most surprising of them. Either that or the most manipulative and evil. She couldn’t figure it out but that was a job left for smarter ponies. Pinkie was their bard of heart and she could stay crazy and wonderful as long as she wanted too. For now, Rainbow Dash just wanted to take one final night to relax as a single mare before she was hitched. Apparently everything was going to change, and being a knight-princess-Wonderbolt was probably going to change a lot.
Applejack was the next to yell. “So, considering the amount of us there are, whose all, ya know, going first?’
Rainbow Dash hollered back. “First for what?”
Applejack fixed her with a stare. “First to bed after the wedding?”
Twilight shouted. “Obviously I’m getting Celestia first, I’ve been waiting for this for years, ever since that fateful cucumber. I had to use my teeth to remove it, I'll have you know!”
Everypony stared at her, not quite sure what to make of that sentence. Choosing the better part of sanity they ignored it. Fluttershy squeaked. Rarity smiled and shouted, “Fluttershy nominates me to be the first one with Luna.”
A book flew through the air slamming into the back of Rarity’s head. Everypony stared at the culprit, Fluttershy. Twilight let out a sigh and shouted for her instead. “What Fluttershy really said was that I was going to also bed Luna first.”
Another book flew this time it hit Twilight in the face. Twilight rubbed at her nose. “Okay fine, she said that she wanted Luna first, if that’s okay with the rest of us. Honestly I don’t want to have another book thrown at me so I guess I’ll choose to be okay with it.”
Rarity shouted next. “I agree, those books really hurt, darling.”
Fluttershy huffed, her face was as red as could be but she looked satisfied with those responses.
Applejack shouted back at Rarity. “Ah think you and me should probably share Luna.”
Rarity shouted back. “Agreed, that way neither of us feel guilty.”
Rainbow Dash laughed. “You’re both weird.”
Applejack looked at her. “What about you, don’t you care?”
“Nope? It’s gonna happen when it happens.”
Pinkie Pie giggled. “Since I want both of the Princesses at the same time, I guess I have to wait until everypony else has already had their fill. I’m going to get slippery, sloppy, sixths!”
Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes. “Does it really matter in what order we actually do this in? I mean besides Twilight and Fluttershy apparently? We’re all going to be gross and covered in someone’s nasty sauce by the end of it.”
Rarity called out. “We’re missing the really important part, darling. The wedding night is just the start. Our honeymoon is going to be the real challenge. I think we’ve spent three days confused, arguing, and playing pranks on one another more than actually thinking long term here. Then there will be living situations after that.”
Applejack called back. “Already covered the last part. Ah’m still living on the farm but Luna and Celestia are welcome to visit anytime, they’ll be family after all.”
Rarity put a hoof to her chin. “Well I technically have two different homes… I guess I’ll just have three now.”
Twilight cried out. “I still want to be a librarian, but I want to be Celestia and Luna’s house wife! So I kinda need a house.”
Rarity rolled her eyes. “Why are you so insistent on such a simple thing? You could be anything you want. You’re a princess.”
“And I want to be a housewife!”
“But, darling-“
“The next book being thrown at you is coming from me.”
That brought a laugh out of everypony there. Rainbow Dash felt like she could fully relax for the first time in a few days. Things were changing and moving pretty fast, but she was the fastest pegasus in Equestria. If she couldn’t keep up with this speed she had no right calling herself that anymore.
Rainbow Dash heard a knock at her bedroom door. The others all turned as she did so they must have gotten similar knocks at the same time. Going to open it, Rainbow Dash saw her servant. A small pegasus mare with bouncy curly blond hair and white fur. She was a contender for a Pinkie clone if she ever saw one.
“Hiya!” she said in a bouncy tone.
“Sup, Surprise.”
“Lady Rainbow Dash, it’s dinner time and I bet you're hungry flying around all the time right?”
Dinner/breakfast tonight was another extravagant meal. From prized salmon and fluffy pancakes, to everything inbetween. There was even haybacon on the table. Though it was oddly red and fatty for hay bacon. Twilight assumed this was probably some rare fancy form of haybacon, and after tasting it her mouth melted. It was probably the best thing she had ever eaten in her life, and it should be a crime to make something so delicious.
She sat next to Celestia who was smiling as she ate some of the rare bacon herself. Seemingly happy to share it with Twilight. Luna had taken one bite of it, her eyes widened and a pleasurable groan escaped her lips. “My word, sister it cannot be, is this real bacon?”
Celestia smiled. “I am getting married to six different mares tomorrow… seven if we count you. I think even I can break the rules sometimes.”
Everypony ended up having a share of the so-called ‘real bacon’ whatever that was. Everypony ate it and loved it. Well except for Fluttershy. For some reason Luna took the piece off of Fluttershy’s plate and ate it before she could even do more than smell it. That was rude as there was hardly any of it here to begin with… or maybe Celestia and Luna had just grabbed so much of it that it was gone before anypony even noticed it existed.
Considering how rare it must be, Twilight assumed that it would be another century before Fluttershy got her chance to eat it. She instead was forced to eat the salted and grilled salmon. Twilight as did most anypony loved their salmon, but had eaten enough of that for one lifetime. She instead was focusing on the lighter and fluffier disk shaped pancakes which she could absolutely drench in syrup, caramel, chocolate, butter, and even this new concoction Pinkie came up with, peanut butter syrup… the last of which was probably the best thing she’d ever eaten. Pinkie had well earned her ability to stay in this marriage… not that Twilight was going to hold much jealousy anymore. After Celestia’s confession to her sister, she realized that by being so jealous she only hurt Celestia and her friends, two things she couldn’t easily forgive herself for.
At the very least they were all still friends, somehow.
Rainbow Dash was busy eating as much cake as she could. It seemed she and Pinkie were almost having a contest over it. Of course the real winner would always be Pinkie, ain’t nopony could keep up with that mare’s appetite for the sweeter things.
Rarity was busy flirting with Applejack. “Darling, you would look absolutely wonderful in both a dress or a tuxedo.”
Applejack was blushing. “An all Ah want from you is to wear the most beautiful dress you can.”
Rarity rolled her eyes. “Of course I am, would I ever do anything other than look fabulous?”
Applejack leaned in. “Not if yer life depended on it.”
Oddly enough Twilight had seen them talk like this many times before in the past but she never once thought there could be more to this than simple friendship. The fact they were so close had just felt like natural friendship, but knowing better now made so many things more clear to her.
Fluttershy was still near Luna, but was not quite touching her this time. The scare of becoming a batpony for the second time probably was still clear on her mind. The fact that one of her teeth was still a noticeably sharp fang only cemented the fact that yes, Fluttershy had been permanently scarred by Twilight’s magic and her power to ruin the laws of nature and twist them into shapes they were never meant to be in… something she knew Celestia would be fairly upset to hear.
Actually Twilight had a lot of things she felt like she needed to discuss in detail with Celestia later. After the wedding and perhaps even after the honeymoon. The parasprite swarms came to mind as a lie she had told Celestia and still felt guilty for. How in the world Celestia still wanted to marry her when she was an unstable mess was beyond her, but Twilight felt a lot more calm now all things considered.
Luna was casting an awkward glance at Twilight every now and then. Her smile would falter and there would be a flash of pain in her eyes. Twilight eventually felt she had to say something. “Luna, I still love you.”
A few ponies looked at Luna and back to Twilight expecting more. Luna smiled and shook her head. “Thank you, Twilight… love. I shall try and respect your personal space a lot more in the future. Perhaps I was overeager with all of you.”
Rainbow Dash stopped stuffing her face just long enough to say, “Oh you think? You did just declare us to be your brides out of the blue you know. Ha, I don’t blame you though, I mean with mares like us just waiting to be taken, you had to step up your game somehow. Claim your turf and what not.”
Rarity snapped at her. “Rainbow Dash, she is trying to be considerate of our feelings. Of course I feel everyone of us is committed to this so there is no fear, Luna. We all love you. Both you and Celestia.”
Luna smiled. “Thank you all for being so understanding. I know I can be a bit passionate sometimes, I hope you’ll all continue forgiving me for it.”
Applejack tilted her hat down. “Aw shucks, Sugarcube. Ah think that might be one of yer best qualities, don’t go feeling bad now, ya hear.”
Celestia smiled. “See, Luna. It’s far too late to change your mind even if you wanted to. They’re all enamored with the both of us.”
Luna smiled. “I see, so then, let the jolly dinner of romance continue!”
Twilight nearly whispered to herself. “Well that’s one way to look at it.”
Celestia’s wing wrapped around Twilight. “Oh come now, I feel that is only an appropriate title for this dinner. Don’t you agree?”
Looking around the table and seeing happiness, joy, love and not an ounce of the awkwardness or the jealousy that had been there the past few days… “Yeah, I guess I do.”
Pinkie Pie raised a hoof. “Oh, Princesses, we’re all getting married to each other right? Does that mean we have to like, have sex with everypony here on the wedding night because that’s a lot, even for Rarity.”
Rarity snapped. “Pinkie Pie, I am not some kind of floozy!”
Celestia put a wing to her chin. “Now that is an interesting question.”
Cadance and Shining Armor came in, Spike was on Shining Armor’s back. Cadance seemed to have caught that question as she explained. “Of course not. Technically the law says that the six of you are to wed the two princesses. So by royal wedding laws Celestia and Luna are the only two who have to consummate the marriage with each of you.”
Shining Armor nodded. “We checked and double checked the laws revolving around them.”
Spike laughed. “Guess you two are going to be pretty tired by the end of that night.”
Celestia let out a quiet sigh. “I apologize to whoever gets me last. I may be a bit sluggish by then.”
Luna beamed. “I will have enough endurance to make up for any lacking abilities on Celestia’s side. She is quite a bit older than me, you know.”
Celestia fixed her with a sharp stare. “I’m a year older than you.”
Luna laughed. “But you have had many more years of experience than I. For me this has been the first time I’ve been intimate with ponies in well over a thousand years. My energy and anticipation are boundless!”
Celestia rolled her eyes. “Good for you.”
That brought a few laughs around the table as Cadance and Shining Armor took a seat. Spike jumped onto Twilight’s lap and she levitated a bowl of gems over to him. He grabbed one and popped it into his mouth.
Twlight was probably the only to hear Celestia whisper to herself. “Assuming she can still become a stallion, I’ll save my last round for her.” Twilight quickly pretended she never heard that.
Twilight looked around. All the years she had dined in this room as a foal and during her teenage years, not once had this particular dining room been so full of life, of laughter, and of warmth. Thinking about this she looked at Celestia and saw a smile that she’d rarely ever seen at the dining table. One of such comfort and warmth that it actually raised the temperature by a degree or two. Maybe this really was exactly what Celestia needed.
She was also secretly happy she didn’t have to give her virginity up to every single one of her friends. She was already going to have to give it up to Celestia and then Luna. Anymore than that and she figured she’d probably end up in the hospital from overuse. If that was a thing, she really hoped it wasn’t.
Cadance smiled as she wrapped a wing around Twilight pulling her away from Celestia. “Oh my little ladybug is all grown up, getting married tomorrow and going to lose her virginity soon after! If you still need any tips or advice just let me know there is plenty of time.”
Twilight groaned. “The last time I asked you for advice, I might have gotten a bit too into the educational procedure.”
Cadance rolled her eyes. “This time I won’t use illusions of you and Celestia, I’ll use illusions of Celestia and Luna instead.”
Luna choked a laugh and Celestia fixed her with a stare that said, ‘if you do, I’m sending you to the moon.’
Cadance laughed. “Or maybe not.” She whispered in a tiny voice. “I’ll still do that if you want to see it.”
Twilight eeped.
Shining Armor looked at Rainbow Dash. “So, Knight-Princess-Wonderbolt I hear?”
Rainbow Dash smiled smugly. “Expect any less from the one and only Rainbow dash?”
“No, not really. I hear me and Rarity might be working together to craft you a suit of armor and a sword to match it soon.’
Rainbow Dash grinned. “Really? The ex captain of the royal guard, working on my armor… even I have to admit that’s awesome.”
“No problem, I might advise we use some odd materials though. So let me ask, would you rather be decked out in a rainbow of dragon scales or have flaming wings?”
Rainbow Dash’s jaw dropped. “Um… can I have both?”
“Well you’re going to be a princess soon, so why not?”
Rarity groaned. “Shining, please, those materials will be a nightmare to work with. Can’t we just use something simpler like the feathers of a roc? Or perhaps the silken aura of an Ursa Major?”
Shining Armor smiled. “We could, but Ursa Major anything is pretty much impossible to find. Rocs are common enough. Oh, and I think we might be able to use the essence of a windigo to keep the armor cool and from getting too hot in the sun.”
Rarity beamed. “Oh, I’ve always wanted to work with such a substance but I’ve had neither the luck nor the funds to acquire Essence of Windigo.”
Shining Armor smile grew. “Welcome to princesshood, credit limit, higher than the sun.”
Celestia shook her head slowly. “She’s not even a princess yet and I can see the bit signs in her eyes. Wait until she realizes just how much she can get as a princess.”
Twilight looked up at Celestia. “Um… sorry about all the books I bought when I first became a princess.”
Celestia laughed. “Oh my, Twilight. You hardly spent a thing on them. The only one I even noticed was that first edition copy of the Theory of Friendship by Starswirl. His understanding of friendship was… awkward to say the least.”
Twilight nodded. “It truly was, but his record keeping of spells that unraveled and twisted reality was pretty good, and my ability to pretend like I understood anything of what I was doing when I turned myself into an alicorn is even better.”
Celestia grinned and gave her a dirty look. “Now who says you turned yourself into an alicorn? Are you quite certain that some, perfectly reasonable, princess didn’t just decide to pluck you up, give you some wings and put you back because she was sick of being lonely?”
Twilight stared at her. “I… h-how?”
Celestia smiled. “I’ll let you help the next time it happens and you’ll find out. Looking at our mutual brides here that might not be all that long in the making. Babies first, godhood second.”
Twilight smiled. It was one of the few times she really considered it. Looking around she realized with them all marrying the Princesses, it meant two very important things. Things they might struggle with but a selfish Twilight was going to be selfish about it anyway. One: Equestria was going to be safe forever as the power of the elements of harmony would always be with them. Two: she was going to keep her friends for an eternity.
Those were two things Twilight could live with. After all, if Doctor Hooves and Starswirl could be immortal, why couldn’t her five best friends?
It was a late evening and Twilight stood in front of the door leading to her room. It would be the first time she’d slept in it in years. She wasn’t scared of sleeping in there. Still something was keeping her from actually going into it. Her heart was preventing her from taking another step in.
A sky blue wing laid over her back causing her to look over to see Rainbow Dash looking at her. “Sup?”
Twilight smiled. “Hi.”
“Nervous?”
“No, why would I be nervous?”
Rainbow Dash glanced back and forth making sure they were both alone before saying, “I am.”
Twilight smiled. “I… I guess I am too.”
Rainbow Dash laughed. “Me and some of the girls are going to be playing some board games. Want to join us?”
Twilight smiled at her. “I’d enjoy that… hey, Rainbow Dash.”
“Yeah, Twi?”
“I’m sorry for scaring you earlier.”
“And I’m sorry for kicking you in the face.”
They shared a nervous laugh as they made their way toward the end of the hall where Pinkie’s room was. “Well… I’m going to be honest. You are kinda attractive…”
Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes. “Well we’re getting married tomorrow so just save your interest until after that, then you can try and get me, tiger.”
Twilight laughed again. “I think I’m supposed to call you that.”
“No, I’m Champ. You can be tiger, or as Pinkie said, Twiggle Wiggle.”
Twilight balked. “Please not that one.”
“Whatever you say, Twiggle Wiggle.”
Twilight groaned but she was happy as could be. Once in Pinkie’s room she realized all of her friends were in there. Rarity was sitting there putting on some lipstick while staring in a small pocket sized mirror. “Oh, Twiggle Wiggle, you joined us. Tonight is our improvised bachelorette party.”
Applejack added. “We decided to avoid any cider, uh… no drunk ponies tonight.”
Fluttershy smiled. “Also I might um… not be so safe around Cider.”
Rarity replied. “Darling, safe is one thing, your sharp little fangs are another altogether.”
Applejack laughed. “At least she didn’t actually succeed in trying to kiss everypony, Pinkie on the other hoof.”
Pinkie Pie bounced up and down. “I did that, oh me, me, I kissed everypony!”
Rainbow Dash led Twilight to a nice comfortable seat on the floor and walked over to where Fluttershy was. She nuzzled the side of her cheek. “Cheer up, Shy. You didn’t actually succeed in taking me.”
Fluttershy was blushing furiously. “I’m so sorry.”
“Don’t sweat it, I am irresistible.”
Twilight swallowed. “Um… Fluttershy.”
Fluttershy looked up at her. “Y-yes?”
“I… I’m sorry too. I really liked the kiss, but you deserve to be treated better than that.”
Fluttershy smiled. “Oh no, I like being treated as a pet, so long as you don’t forget I’m a pony too it’s okay.”
Twilight smiled. “Um… and the kiss?”
Fluttershy’s cheeks went more pink. “I… like that too.”
Rainbow Dash grinned. “Looks like you two are going to be doing the same thing Applejack and Rarity will.”
Rarity rolled her eyes. “Darling, that’s entirely different. My Apple Pie is my first and primary concern. Luna, as much as I love her, is still second.”
Applejack smiled. “That might change down the road, but fer now, ayep. Me and Rares before all of y’all.”
Twilight let out a sigh. “Well at least I didn’t take Rainbow Dash’s virginity. That way she can still give it to Celestia… that was your plan right?”
Rainbow Dash’s eyes widened as every eye in the room turned to her. “I’m, like, totally not a virgin.”
Rarity gasped. Applejack snickered, laughed and then fell onto her back laughing so hard she was crying. Fluttershy mouthed silently to herself and Pinkie Pie was giggling from her place in the corner where she was putting the finishing touches on some cupcakes.
Rarity exclaimed, “YOU’RE A VIRGIN!”
Rainbow Dash groaned. “No, I’m not.” She shot a glare at Twilight.
Twilight shrugged. “Sorry… I didn’t know that was a secret.”
Rainbow Dash covered her face with a hoof. “Look, romance is weird okay. ‘Nuff said.”
Rarity was clapping her hooves together. “Oh this is so exciting, both Twinkle Sprinkle and Rainy Dashy will be losing their innocence tomorrow!”
Rainbow Dash laid down. “Thanks, Twilight. I try to cheer you up, you embarrass me.”
Twilight rubbed a hoof at the back of her head. “Sorry.”
***
Celestia stood in front of the fire in her room. A single document hung in the air before her held aloft in her golden aura. It had a copy number of two hundred and sixty six out of two hundred and sixty six. It was the last copy, the final copy of this law. She could toss it into the flames. It would be gone, and then she could cancel the whole entire affair. Life would go back to reasonable, back to calm, back to silence, and back to loneliness.
She must have sat there for a couple of hours staring at the document as the fire crackled and spread its warmth in the room. Nothing had really changed yet it somehow felt a lot darker in here than normal. A lot quieter than usual. Emptier than it should be. She felt lonely in here all by herself.
Looking back to the bed she recalled how warm Twilight was next to her. She hated to admit it but lying next to her like that… it was one of the most amazing experiences she’d had in many, many years. The warmth she received from the tiny alicorn, the love and gentleness of her. Even waking up to Twilight dry humping her in her sleep was funny enough to give her a smile to keep even this late at night and all by her lonesome.
Looking a little beyond that she recalled how cute Rainbow Dash was lying there writing a letter to her to help calm her nerves. How Rainbow Dash had shared some of her own concerns. Then again at the bed where she might have moved a little too fast but the little prismatic pony had shown such restraint it was worthy of an honor.
Pinkie with her wonderful baking skills. Even with her being upset about the destruction of her dining room it had been so many years since she had seen Twilight having so much fun playing with somepony. In fact even Twilight was a foal she never played with other foals like that. Pinkie brought out a part of Twilight Celestia had never thought she’d ever see again… an innocent and playful part.
Seeing Fluttershy with Luna was a real treat as well. The way Luna looked snuggling up close to the yellow pegasus was endearing and the way Luna smiled looking at her made Celestia’s heart soar. They were such a surprisingly good match.
Rarity had a regal aura of her already, and her understanding of fashion was very interesting. Celestia had long since lost touch with that part of the world, allowing for her servants to help her decide what would be appropriate fashion appeal. In fact she didn’t even bother wearing dresses to the Gala most times anymore, not until Rarity appeared and made the thought of wearing a dress fun and new again. She didn’t just make something she thought would look good on the mare, she made things that spoke to Celestia’s soul.
Applejack was a real family pony and had a quiet sense of calm and power to her. She was always somepony she wanted to really sit down with and get to know better on a personal level. The only reason she hadn’t before was because she knew Twilight would interfere out of her obsession… but that might change now.
Celestia let out a quiet sigh. “How long have you been there?”
Luna stepped out of the shadows and took a seat nearby. “Awhile. Long enough to know you haven’t burned the last copy of the law yet.”
Celestia looked at it. “I… is this something you really want?”
“Sister, you know that I want this. Let me ask you; is this something that you really want?”
Celestia looked at her.
Luna continued. “I know I may have scared you into thinking I might go crazy or something if I didn’t get my marriage. I apologize for that. I didn’t think you’d even think about the possibility if I had brought it up in normal conversation. So I took drastic measures to see if you’d give this a chance.”
Celestia looked back at the law. “I… agree with your sentiment. If you had just asked me about it, I would have not only disagreed, I might have grown distant and stern on the subject.”
Luna smiled. “I still want this, so I will take care of everypony involved if need be. If you want to back out, if this is too much for you, nopony will force you to do this.”
Celestia let out a sigh. “But the law-“
Luna’s horn lit up and a dark blue aura surrounded the document. It went flying into the fire and burned up as if it were an unwanted letter. “What law?”
Celestia stared back at her. “Luna! What did you do?”
“I gave you the choice.”
Celestia could feel her breathing growing fast. “Luna, if you do that, they might turn you down. They could say no now. What if they don’t want to marry you?”
Luna shook her head. “I love them, sister. And if you truly love something, you have to be ready to let it go. I know you understand this better than most.”
“So… you’ve been prepared for them to not marry you the entire time?”
Luna smiled. “This law, that was just part of the game with you. To see you work towards destroying it and stopping the marriage. Which I could then make my moves to try and secure the marriage for us. It was fun, but I would never be so cruel as to lock anypony into a marriage they did not want. Not even if they had been eaten by a cake monster only to be pooped out by it later.”
Celestia laughed at the memory. “I’m sorry.”
Luna smiled. “It’s fine. We haven’t had so much fun together since I returned. You’ve always treated me so carefully, and cautiously. Seeing you play jokes on me, try to manipulate things against me, it was honestly fun. It felt like we were sisters again.”
Celestia’s smile faded. “I’m… have I really been that terrible?”
Luna reached out with a hoof. “No, you have been wonderful, perhaps too much so. I am not your child, nor am I your fragile lover, I am your sister and I wish to be your equal. That means sometimes we will fight, sometimes we will play jokes on one another, sometimes we will manipulate ponies into doing our bidding to spite one another. That’s just what sisters do.”
Celestia nodded. “Luna… thank you.”
Luna shook her head. “No, thank you, sister. Even if the marriages are canceled tomorrow I will still be able to feel like this castle won’t be so lonely with you in it.”
Celestia smiled. “I… I do want to marry them. It sounds fun. Besides, it will make sure that Equestria will have a safety net that will last for an eternity. A bunch of immortal princesses that can defeat evil with the powers of friendship, harmony and love… I would feel safe in that world.”
Luna nodded. “Of course, and besides. What would be the alternative, put Twilight in charge?” she laughed. “I fear as nice as she is, she is about as stable in a leadership position as Discord follows the natural order. We might as well put him in charge again.”
Celestia shivered. “No thank you. It was fun for a century or two but no.”
Luna laughed. “Then the alternative is either rule forever ourselves or get a group of immortals that will be able to keep each other sane. No single pony should ever have to rule Equestria alone. That is my belief.”
Celestia nodded. “That is one thing I can agree on.”
Celestia yawned and stood up on tired legs. She wobbled a little and felt her sister lean by her side to support her. Together they walked to the bed where Luna helped Celestia into bed and covered her up. It was still so cold in here, still lonely without Twilight.
Luna turned to leave. “Have good dreams.”
Celestia spoke in nearly a whisper. “Luna… please don’t leave me alone.”
Luna looked back at her. “What do you want me to hold you or something?”
Celestia nodded.
Luna laughed but came to her side and crawled into the bed with her. “Okay, but do not tell our brides we did such a thing. The pink one already thinks we are doing far more than hugging in private. Not that I'm opposed to such ideas mind you.”
Celestia closed her eyes. “I’m sorry… it’s just so lonely without my Twilight here.”
Luna squeezed Celestia closer to her. “This is something that I can understand. Let us comfort each other then. For tonight will be the last night we will ever have to sleep alone again.”
As the fire behind them died down, Celestia was able to drift off to the wonderful world of dreams. Inside of which she was able to find the most beautiful lavender alicorn. One with whom she could imagine sharing a nice cottage in the countryside. One where she could return to after a hard day's work to find a loving wife with a hot meal and a tender kiss waiting for her. It was a dream, but it was a lovely dream she wouldn’t change for the world.
Twilight found herself in a large open room with the others. The dress she was in was off shade of white going toward the lavender spectrum. She wasn’t much for dresses, or fashion for that matter, she preferred things simple when it came to clothing. Somehow Rarity seemed to anticipate that even without having known who she was making the dress for. Unlike some of the other dresses her friends were all wearing, hers had less lace and focused more on making her look like a giant fluffy bell. Actually to Twilight all wedding dresses were oddly bell shaped.
She could probably make a joke about wedding bells… if Rarity wasn’t busy galloping back and forth and nearly shouting. “Oh, no, it’s almost time! This is so bad!”
Rainbow Dash had a very different design for a dress. It was simple, gave plenty of room for her wings to be free, but was mostly white, except for these rainbow stripes near the tail end of the dress matching her tail and mane. Rainbow Dash was busy rolling her eyes. “Rarity, nopony is going to notice.”
Rarity slumped to the floor. “Noooo, it’s so horrible!”
Applejack reached out and squeezed Rarity’s shoulder. Applejack had the most traditional dress but it came with an apple shaped design on her chest. “Rares, it’s okay, they just want to love us, and don’t care so much about the little or bigger things.”
Rarity shot her a glare. “Say bigger one more time and this time I’ll be the one throwing books at ponies!”
Fluttershy smiled. Her dress was much like twilight’s, it was an off shade of white going towards green, but had an underline of a white-yellow. How many shades of white existed out there, Twilight didn’t know but she was sure Rarity had found them all and put them in one room for today. “D-don’t worry. P-please.”
Rarity groaned. “I am ruined! How could they ever love a selfish ugly mare like me?”
Pinkie Pie giggled. “Rarity, it’s okay, you’re not really fat, you just ate too much last night.”
Rarity glared at her. “It’s your fault you are a distributor of sugary delights! It was your cupcakes that did this to me!”
Twilight wasn’t even sure what the problem was, Rarity had hardly explained. She just started screaming that she wasn’t able to fit in her dress properly and had to loosen it. She was currently wearing it though. Probably the most complicated dress in the room in terms of design. Filled with a swirling and curly design, lots of white and purple. It was lovely, but it was almost hard to look at.
Still, Rarity had managed to wear it. Now she just had to stop throwing a fit and they could get on with the marriage. Speaking of which Spike walked into the room wearing the cute little tuxedo Rarity had made him ages ago. “Girls, they’re ready for you.”
Rarity stopped crying. Stood up straight and smiled. Her entire demeanor changed in an instant. “Thank you, Spike.”
Twilight had to ask, “What about being upset with your dress?”
Rarity smiled. “Darling, we’re getting married, at least one of us needs to have a breakdown before hoof. It’s practically mandatory. Now let’s not terry, our lovely wives are waiting for us.”
They left the room almost all at the same time to find the hall they’d entered to be mostly empty. There stood Cadance at the far end on the podium with Luna and Celestia next to her. Twilight almost tripped as she realized they were not wearing dresses. Point in fact, Celestia and Luna both wore tuxedos. Celestia wore a white one with a red rose on it, and Luna a black one with a blue rose.
Rarity fluttered her eyes at them. “Oh my, those last minute changes really did the trick.”
Twilight saw Shining Armor nearby. There were a few quiet members of staff near the walls, and one obvious reporter wearing a tuxedo and writing things down and taking photos. It was odd though, because his eyes were wide with terror and his mane and tail looked singed, in fact parts of his fur did too. It was almost like he just got done escaping a burning building.
Shining Armor laughed as he looked at him. “Oh don’t worry about him, he just learned the hard way that the sun is not the best place for a vacation.”
Twilight wasn’t quite sure what that meant but she was sure she didn’t want to. Other than that this room was practically empty of ponies. This really was a quiet and private wedding like they’d been promised. Shining Armor took Twilight’s side and together they all walked down the aisle toward their future wives.
Every step she took brought up her heart rate. This was really happening, she was really getting married. The day had finally come and she was beyond happy. No matter how embarrassing, slippery, or hard to remove that cucumber was, it was now more worth it than ever before. Not that Twilight would ever mention such things.
Everypony was following and she could tell they were feeling just as nervous as she was but none of them balked, ran, or looked anywhere other than at Celestia and Luna. Their brilliance was beyond measure.
Once on the podium they all stood facing Celestia and Luna. Cadance smiled. “Well, I guess it’s time then?”
Celestia nodded. “One moment.”
Luna smiled. “This is the private wedding, we are scheduled to have a public reception in a few days, where we’ll need to be more formal, for now we can do things a little differently.”
Celestia added. “The law which forces the six of you to marry us no longer exists. Should any of you feel like you want to leave, you are free to do so and neither myself nor Luna will hold any ill will toward you.”
Luna nodded. “This was rather spontaneous after all.”
There was some silence for a long moment. When nopony moved or spoke, Celestia smile grew. “Cadance.”
Cadance smiled. “Well normally these things are dragged out but Celestia and Luna have made their intention clear. Anypony who keeps them from their wedding cake longer than strictly necessary will be sent to the sun. So in that regard I ask simply, Celestia and Luna, do you take these six ponies to be your lawfully, wedded wives?”
Celestia and Luna replied at the same time. “I do.”
Cadance looked at them. “Twilight Sparkle, Rarity, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, Applejack, and Pinkie Pie, do you take Celestia and Luna to be your lawfully wedded wives?”
Almost in unison they all said, “I do.”
Pinkie was late to the ball. “I SUPER DUPER DO!”
Twilight shook her head. “Pinkie, we spent all night practicing this.”
Pinkie Pie grinned. “I know, but I just thought of the best way to add to it!”
Cadance smiled. “Well then, you may all kiss the brides… somehow.”
The plan here was simple as well; stay still and let Celestia and Luna take turns kissing them all. Rarity and Applejack broke that mold as they kissed each other first. Twilight could feel a sigh coming, they just needed to get through this successfully, don’t mess it up. She watched as Celestia and took turns kissing each of the other five brides before making their way to her. Luna was the first to kiss Twilight, just a simple light kiss to make the vows solidified. When Celestia came up to her Twilight’s heart raced. She could feel Celestia’s hot breath against her as she leaned in. it smelled minty fresh as if she had just eaten a box of mints. Gently Celestia’s lips met with Twilight’s.
Once they pulled away Twilight looked up into those big beautiful eyes. “We’re married?”
Celestia smiled. “We are now.”
Twilight smiled. “Good, I managed to get through this without messing it up.” She closed her eyes and proceeded to pass out, but never hit the floor as Celestia caught her.
***
A couple of hours later the eight married mares found themselves back in the same dining room they had been in so many nights before. This part of the marriage didn’t have any reporters. Just food, friends, love. Oh and there was Shining Armor and Cadance.
The cake that was made was a massive monstrosity, it was mostly covered in white frosting but had designs of every pony’s cutie marks on the sides. Eight different layers, eight different cutie marks, and at the top of it all sat six little pony brides and two stallions.
The best part of the cake was its flavor. Twilight didn’t know what Pinkie had put in here, but the thing tasted like actual magic. The fact that it was glowing and had a tingly feeling to it, made her feel that maybe it actually had magic in it. Twilight made sure never to ask Pinkie about how she made her cakes, knowing how it would ruin the fun, so that gypsy witchcraft could stay secret.
She was more than satisfied with this setup. Sure it was different than what she originally imagined but it wasn’t any worse, it might even be better. The one thing Cadance had mentioned was that the public wedding was a few days from then, and that was going to be the real challenge. Banners, parades, Fluttershy’s stage fright… it was going to be an intense week.
After that they could go on their honeymoon. Speaking of which nopony had agreed on a honeymoon yet. Twilight really just wanted to stay in Celestia’s bed for a week… or go home.
As things calmed down a little Twilight asked. “Hey, what if we just have our honeymoon in Ponyville?”
Everypony looked at her like she had just given them the strangest suggestion. Twilight continued. “Well for us, we’ll all get to go home and be with family and relax a little. For our new wives, they’ll get to see our homes and get a break from the hustle and bustle of city life and the castle. It might be more of a honeymoon for them, but think about all the things we could show them!”
Rarity spoke first. “Twilight, that’s… not a bad idea. I could show my dear Luna the boutique, have either of you ever visited?”
Luna and Celestia shook their heads.
Applejack grinned. “And Ah get to introduce y’all to mah family.”
Rarity added. “Oh, Sweetie Belle will be so happy to see you two!”
Fluttershy added. “I can show you my animals… if um… you want.”
Rainbow Dash stretched her wings above her head. “And I got a castle you can stay at. It’s pretty sweet.”
Pinkie pie squealed. “I can show you two too my second parents! The Cakes will love you!”
Twilight smiled. “And I calculate book forts and intense reading sessions.”
Celestia’s wing reached out and stroked Twilight’s cheek. “With you there, I might be a little distracted. Reading might be hard.”
Twilight’s cheeks warmed up. “I uh… I’m okay with that too.”
Well at least the honeymoon was planned. Something down to earth, simple, and relaxing. One where everypony could just enjoy themselves. There would be more time for crazy adventures in the future.
Cadance spoke up. “As lovely as that sounds, isn’t there one single problem with using Ponyville as your honeymoon?”
Twilight looked at her. “Oh, what’s that?”
Cadance met her eyes. “You all live there, you’re going to introduce these two to the place no matter what. Shouldn’t the honeymoon be an actual vacation for all of you?”
Twilight looked around and heard murmurs of agreement. Well guess the honeymoon wasn’t planned after all. Still that was future Twilight’s problem. For now, cake.
As the morning went on and turned into noon it began to become apparent there was really only one more thing left to do for their wedding to be complete. It wasn’t very subtle when Celestia, with a stroke of her feather caught Twilight’s attention and led her to the door leading out. Luna seemed to catch on and announced. “I suspect it’s time for us to retire to our respective rooms. I shall accompany the five of you to the Hall of Friendship!”
Twilight and Celestia diverged from this path and made their way to Celestia’s bed chambers instead. This time Twilight knew what was going to happen and her heart was beating so fast she thought she might faint again. Oh please don’t let her faint, that would be too embarrassing. The door opened and Twilight swallowed as she was allowed to walk in first.
Once Celestia followed and closed the door behind them. Celestia made her way toward the bed but didn’t get on it. She looked back at Twilight. “Is everything okay?”
Twilight swallowed. “Um, well I’ve um… never… done this… what, what should I do?”
Celestia smiled as she patted the bed with a wing. “Join me on the bed and I’ll show you.”
Twilight walked, each step making her body shake with anticipation. “C-Celestia…”
Celestia smiled as Twilight climbed onto the bed. “Yes, my love.”
“Will you… teach me?”
Celestia reached out with a hoof stroking Twilight’s cutie mark. “Oh, that’s exactly what I plan to do. You're about to get your first of many, many lessons.”
Twilight laid down, the bed was nice and soft beneath her. “Thank you.”
Celestia shook her head. “No need to thank me, I should thank you.”
Twilight smiled. “For what?”
“For rescuing me from that dreaded cucumber and then asking to marry me.”
“I thought we weren’t supposed to talk about that?”
“Well, you might end up using cucumbers again at some point so it might be a little silly to avoid any discussions on it.”
Twilight raised an eyebrow. “What would I use them for?”
“Oh, you’re still so innocent. It’s almost a shame that I will have to go.”
Celestia leaned in and her mouth met Twilight’s in a flash. This time it wasn’t just a simple peck on the lips. Twilight felt that burning hot tongue once more. That magical energy filling her up. At least this time, Celestia seemed to be in control of herself and the tongue did not go as far down her throat as it possibly could. It was still far too large for Twilight’s mouth. She had to pull away and take some deep breaths before continuing.
Twilight soon learned that big, long, and hot tongues were used for a lot more than just kissing as their night quickly devolved into writhing naked bodies, hot passion, and sweat. There was no way Twilight have anticipated just how amazing sex was going to be. The best news was, Luna was going to be next.
***
It was far later in the evening than it should have been and Luna was taking a private flight around the castle. Her entire body was aching from the events of the day. As it had turned out, Applejack and Rarity had worked together to get both Luna and Celestia. Out of everypony those two had been the most energetic and the most challenging to please. Still she had succeeded, and from what she heard, Celestia had been treated to a delightful pleasure she couldn’t stand up too. They were a little too much for her.
The thought made her laugh. A lot of things about the past few days, or even the past few months made her laugh. She eventually found herself landing on a cloud and staring up at the night sky as the stars sparkled through the sky.
A masculine laugh was heard from beside her. She glanced over and saw her target. Discord was busy peddling an invisible bike through the sky. “Good evening, newlywed.”
She smiled at him. “Good evening, Discord.”
He smiled. “So, how did things go?”
“Oh you should already know.”
“Yes, I suppose I do, it was quite wonderful chaos.” He laughed. “I hear some of those wives of yours enjoyed that spell I helped you learn.”
“Oh my yes, as it turns out becoming a stallion was actually quite useful. Even my sister seems to enjoy that one.”
Discord laughed harder. “You and her?”
“Not yet… That’s my next goal after our conversation.”
Discord leaned forward. “You always were my favorite of the two.”
“Well I am the most playful. Honestly, you were always so much fun when you were in a good mood. I’m happy to see your back with us. We should go pranking the night away again sometime.”
Discord nodded. “That would be good, just don’t tell Fluttershy. She disapproves of such things, and her opinion does mean so much to me.”
Luna purred. “Fluttershy, I believe she may be my favorite.”
“Good,” he replied. “Because if you ever hurt her, even a little, there is no dream you can escape that I will not follow.”
Luna swallowed. “I shall keep that in mind.”
Discord began to peddle away. “Oh and tell Pinkie she won her bingo game. How she managed to kiss herself is beyond me but I checked and she did. Happily ever after is hers, for whatever it's worth.”
She watched him go. “Thank you for helping me find that law, Discord.”
“Oh no worries, that law was quite boring in its original state. Honestly, it was written in such a way that you’d only preside over their respective marriages filling the same role as a priest and not marry them directly, a slight modification so that they marry both you and your sister was too much fun.”
Luna watched as he sped up on that invisible bike and disappeared into the night sky. Her brain worked through that statement for some time until it began to click… he set up the whole thing for chaos’s sake… that crafty Draconequus. That crafty, sweet Draconequus.
Well it’s true what they say after all, there is no force more powerful, nor more chaotic than love itself.
