> Angelic Disposition > by MyHobby > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- > Diamond In the Rough > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Angel Bunny relaxed beneath a tall tree growing behind Fluttershy’s Cottage, the shade from the leaves only just sheltering him from the Sun’s warming rays. It was a beautiful summer day and he was bound and determined to enjoy it to the fullest, especially before a certain yellow-colored Pegasus decided she needed a certain Bunny’s help with the chores. He was suddenly broken out of his stupor by a high-pitched shriek that can only be made when a young filly’s delight reaches a boiling point. “Oh, thank you, daddy! Thank you!” Angel opened one eye just enough to get a look at the offending pony. She was, just as he deduced, a young filly with a purple and white striped mane and a light pinkish coat. Standing behind her was an average-sized stallion with a slicked-back mane and a way-too-expensive tie. Opening the other eye, the bunny saw Fluttershy standing next to an armadillo, one of the “animal friends” she took care of. She nudged the curious mammal forward with one hoof. “Go on little one, say hello!” The armadillo walked up to the filly and sniffed at her hooves experimentally. “Hehe! His whiskers tickle!” The little pink pony nuzzled her new friend and asked, “Can we name him Dollar Dillo, daddy?” The stallion grinned. “I don’t see why not, Diamond” There was a flash of delight in Angel’s eyes as the realization hit him; the stallion was Filthy Rich and he was here to get his daughter a pet from Fluttershy! A slow grin spread across his face; he wasn’t sure how it all worked out, but ponies getting a pet from Fluttershy always meant that that the two of them had a few extra bits to spend. Angel usually took the opportunity to remind his caretaker about the most amazing, most tantalizing, most mouth-wateringly crisp salad ever invented by ponykind. The salad that dreams were made of. He bounced over to where Diamond Tiara was playing with her new friend and gave the armadillo a “thumbs up.” “Dollar Dillo” smiled back at him, and then carried on prancing around with the filly. Angel looked over to see Fluttershy and Filthy Rich discussing payment and grinned as the stallion passed over a few bits. “Oh, thank you, Mr. Filthy.” Fluttershy said as she tucked the bits into a little coin purse. “It’s ‘Rich,’ ma’am,” The business-pony said with a sigh. That last statement went unheard as Fluttershy walked over to Angel Bunny and scooped him up in her foreleg. “Isn’t it wonderful when somepony finds the joy of animals, Angel?” Thinking about his future salad, Angel couldn’t help but nod in agreement. My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fan Fiction Angelic Disposition: Part One Diamond In The Rough Angel sulked as he rode on Fluttershy’s back, “I told you we didn’t have time to go to the market today, Angel Bun. We simply have too many errands to run.” He tapped his foot impatiently. “No, we can’t put off on helping Screwloose with her dogs; it just wouldn’t be right.” He waved his front paws around excitedly. “No, Angel Bun, i’m not letting you go shopping on your own.” He then knelt down on her back, paws in a praying position. “Angel, sweetie, no means no. We’ll do it first thing in the morning tomorrow, I promise.” Having given up on ever seeing the salad today, Angel decided to just sit back and enjoy the ride. Facing backwards, he was the first to see one of Fluttershy’s friends approaching. He nudged Fluttershy in the shoulder to give her a heads-up. “Hi, Fluttershy!” “Oh! Hello, Twilight, how are you today?” The studious purple pony levitated a shiny new book out of her saddlebag. “I’m great; the library just got that new book you wanted to read! I couldn’t wait to bring it to you!” “Oh my! Is it the Blah Blah Blah?” “Yes! You’re gonna love the part where Blah Deedley Blah Blah Blah!” Noting that the conversation was not about him, and most certainly not about salad, Angel figured that it was safe to tune the chatting mares out. He let his eyes wander as Fluttershy continued down the road to Screwloose’s house, near the edge of Ponyville. As they passed the park, he noticed that Diamond Tiara and Dollar Dillo were playing with another filly, one with a… A spoon for a Cutie Mark? Angel shrugged; he supposed that particular mark made about as much sense as a bunch of bubbles. He watched as they played, a smile spreading across his face as they pranced around the park. He didn’t have quite the sappiness that his caretaker did when it came to pets playing with their ponies, but it did bring warm feelings to his heart to remember how he felt when Fluttershy had picked him out of the litter. The fillies started rolling the armadillo back and forth like a small ball, giggling with joy. Diamond Tiara looked up and saw something on the other side of the park; motioning that she would be right back, she walked towards whatever it was. Noticing that she was headed a little closer to where Fluttershy and Twilight Sparkle were walking, he decided that whatever the pink filly was about to do had to be way more interesting than what the pegasus and the unicorn were blabbing about; why not eavesdrop? “Because it’s sneaky and rude and dishonest!” Angel looked back in shock, wondering if his pony friend had suddenly developed mind-reading powers. To his relief, they were just talking about the book’s main villain. Or something. He turned back to see where Diamond Tiara was headed, and saw that she had already closed in on one of the most boisterous organizations in all of Equestria: the Cutie Mark Crusaders. Angel suddenly wished that he had a bowl of popcorn. Diamond Tiara walked up to the CMC (that’s what most folks called the Cutie Mark Crusaders, at least the ones without a tongue-twister Cutie Mark of their own) and began her usual greeting. “Hey, guys! Anypony get their Cutie Marks yet? Or are you all still Blank Flanks!?” “Go away, Diamond Tiara.” Apple Bloom was having none of it today, it seemed. “We’re busy.” “How rude! I was just going to ask you three if you wanted to bring your pets over so that we could have our very own Pony Pet Playdate! Oh, wait,” The pink filly said with a sadistic grin. “You three don’t have pets. Do you?” “You don’t have a pet either,” this time the remark came with a squeak from Sweetie Belle. “Oh, you didn’t know? My daddy just got me a pet from Fluttershy, he’s an armadillo!” She then added with an absolutely disgusting smirk, “Do you even know what an armadillo is?” “It’s a leathery-armored mammal of the order Cingulata, typically found in southern Equestria. It has a diet of mostly insects, grubs and other invertebrates.” Scootaloo found herself the subject of several disbelieving stares. “What? Can I help it if I had to do a report on them last semester?” “Well…” It was clear that Tiara was having a hard time recovering from that little speed bump. “Well it’s not like you’ve actually seen one in real life before!” “Oh, guys! Remember when Cheerilee brought an armadillo to show the class the other day!?” Sweetie Belle smiled as she remembered. Then her smile fell. “Oh, that was the day you were sick with hay fever, wasn’t it, Diamond?” Now Diamond was getting mad. Mad as a hatter, if Angel had to guess. Pouting out her lower lip, it was clear that she was about to bring out the big guns, the crème de la crème of comebacks, the mother of all retorts… “Well, well you’re just…” Angel rolled his eyes; what an amateur. Diamond noticed Apple Bloom walking over to the CMC’s combination scooter/wagon, affectionately called the “Scootsmobile,” and decided to pounce. “Where you going, redneck? Back home to mommy and daddy?” Apple Bloom stopped walking, Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle stopped breathing and Angel’s heart stopped beating. Diamond Tiara stood there, a smile of triumph on her face. In the distance, the filly with the spoon Cutie Mark could be heard shouting, “Come on, Diamond! We’re, like, waiting!” Angel looked around to see if any other ponies had heard the conversation. Typically, no one noticed Diamond Tiara’s venom-spewing. The snotty filly began to walk away from the CMC, confident that she had officially ruined their day completely. This was the lowest Angel had ever seen Diamond stoop; she had been cruel before, but this was just plain nasty. As she got about halfway back to her spoony friend and her pet, Apple Bloom suddenly turned around and shouted at her, face as red as her barn door. “Ya’ll better run! If’n you don’t, you’ll find out eggz-actly how the Apple Family deals with Horse Apples lahk you!” Tiara just stuck her snout in the air and nudged her friend. “Come on, Silver Spoon, it’s getting really lame out here.” Silver Spoon looked at her friend, “Like, what happened?” The armadillo was looking from the CMC to his caretaker and back, just as confused as Silver. “Someponies just don’t know when they’re beaten,” The pink filly said with a sigh. “Come on, we’ll play by the pond.” Angel looked over at the Cutie Mark Crusaders, Apple Bloom was so angry that she was fighting back tears, while the other two were doing their best to consol her. Angel put his foot down determinedly, he was not just going to lie here and let Diamond Tiara get away with such a cop-out victory to her battle-of-the-wits! Thinking about it, he decided that she was also really mean; that should count against her, too. Of course, now he had to decide on just how to rain down just vengeance upon her… As usual, Screwloose was having trouble communicating with her two dogs. Also as usual, the blue mare was about as nutty as a fudge factory. “I’ve been barking at them all day long, but they haven’t done a thing I’ve told them!” Angel began to wonder how she had ever gotten a job as a nurse at the hospital, when she clearly needed to be admitted there. Fluttershy looked a bit uncertain about how to handle her dilemma. “Well, um… Have you tried to bark in Doberman?” “Doberman, Cocker spaniel, I’ve even tried Chihuahua! Nothing works! All they do all day is just…” She motioned to the dogs. The two of them sat there like good little puppies; mouths wide open, tongues hanging in the breeze, and blank stares in their eyes. “You see!?” Fluttershy looked at the dogs, then at the ground. She thought for a couple of seconds before turning to Screwloose. “Um… What have you been trying to tell the dogs to do all day?” Screwloose motioned Fluttershy closer and whispered in her ear. Fluttershy’s eyes widened and Angel began to think that he didn't even want to know. He was right. “A-actually,” Fluttershy replied, it’s your job to clean up their… Leftovers. Not theirs.” The blue coated mare looked at Fluttershy like she had just overturned everything she had ever believed. “My job? What are you talking about?” Fluttershy went into Full Caretaker Mode, “It’s part of your job as the caretaker of these dogs to feed them, train them, clean them up and clean up after them, and protect them from those they cannot protect themselves from.” She looked at the dogs; they seemed to be hanging upon her every word. “Part of that is cleaning up their, um, Leftovers…” Fluttershy wrinkled her nose, “Didn’t we have this discussion when you got them from me?” Angel would have bet on Screwloose needing to hear the speal every couple of months, if he read the clues about said pony’s mental state right. Screwloose was beginning to get a nervous twitch in her eye, so Fluttershy decided to wrap it up. “Well, how about this; if you need your dogs to follow you, or to stay, or something that dogs actually need to do…” Angel could tell his pegasus friend wasn’t sure that she was getting though, yet like a trooper she continued on. “Then talk to them, but not with barking. Speak firmly, calmly, and simply; and tell them what you need them to do, ok?” Fluttershy smiled uneasily, hoping that she had gotten though to the addled nurse. Screwloose squinted her eyes at the yellow pegasus, examining her from head to toe. With a suddenness that would have left Pinkie Pie reeling, she snapped out of it and smiled at Fluttershy. “Well, alright then, you’re the expert!” She led Fluttershy and Angel away from the dogs and into the front yard. “You’ve been so helpful, I can’t thank you enough!” Giving his caretaker some bits that would probably find better use paying for therapy, she practically shoved them into the street. Fluttershy watched Screwloose disappear behind the house, giggling like crazy. “Um, glad to help?” She started down the road, doing her absolute best to keep a steady pace and not to run for the hills. Angel patted her on the head, hoping that she wasn’t too nervous after her encounter with the odd mare. She smiled at the bunny, “Oh, don’t worry, Angel, I’ve gotten used to Miss Screwloose by now.” A frown appeared on her face and her eyes grew wide. “At least, I think I have.” Angel cupped his head in his paws, motioning that maybe she should go back to the cottage to rest for a bit. “Well, that was the last errand I needed to do today… And it is getting dark… Maybe you’re right.” She turned down the road leading to the edge of town. Angel smiled and stuck a small carrot in his mouth; he loved it when a plan came together. Fluttershy had turned in for the evening after the both of them had watched Celestia lower the sun and Luna raise the moon. Angel checked to make sure she was sleeping soundly, and then crept out of a small window in the back of the house. He had decided that the only payment that could truly answer for Diamond Tiara’s actions was a prank. A merciless prank, designed to humiliate her and bring her down. To show her how it feels to be on the other side of the teasing. Angel threw his head back and unleashed the most dastardly, most maniacal, most villainous laugh that he’d ever laughed. “Squeak!” Looking back and forth to make sure that no one had heard his rather pathetic attempt; Angel bounced his way over to where ponyville’s most notorious prankster lived… Rainbow Dash’s house. Hopping up to the floating cloud-house, he stood underneath its main entrance and coughed, just a little “ahem" to get the occupant’s attention. No answer. He “ahemed” again, louder this time. Still no answer. He took a dead breath in preparation for the next assault on his little bunny throat, until he noticed a small green head poke its way over the side of the cloud. Angel waved at his friend and a smile slowly spread across the tortoise’s wrinkly head. The earthbound bunny was about to signal for his aerial friend to bring him up to the house, but the head disappeared back behind the cloud. Nothing happened for several minutes, leaving Angel to tap his foot on the ground, wondering just what was taking the other pet so long. Suddenly, a green blur shot out of the cloud, zipped down to the ground and stopped inches from Angel’s face. The bunny glared at the Floating tortoise, held aloft by a high-powered beanie propeller. Tank the Tortoise just grinned back toothlessly. Angel pointed towards the house, hoping for Tank to fly them both up there. Tank blinked with all the speed of a lethargic snail. Angel motioned towards himself, then to Tank, then finally to the floating house. Tank slowly looked from the bunny, to himself, to Rainbow Dash’s domicile and then back to Angel. Angel laid his head in his paws and sighed, what he wouldn’t give for a pair of pony vocal chords. He was about to attempt another explanation, when he suddenly felt his feet leave the ground. Tank carried him up to Rainbow Dash’s house quick enough that the bunny thought that his stomach had been left behind. The flying pets zipped through the front door and Tank dropped Angel down on the entry way floor. The entry way floor that was, as far as Angel could recall, made up entirely of cloud. Little Mr. Bun screamed as he fell, knowing that without some sort of magical spell, any visitor who was not a griffon or a pegasus had about as much of a chance of standing on a cloud as they had of sprouting wings and flying away. Angel considered his life up to this point, had he any regrets, or any unfulfilled wishes? Had he been the best pet he could be for Fluttershy? Had he done all he could to bring her out of her shell? Was there anything he could have changed…? SPLAT Angel opened his eyes, expecting to see a divine light, welcoming him home to Bunny Heaven. Instead he found himself staring into the eyes of a very confused tortoise. He sat up and patted the ground beneath him, it felt like he was sitting on Linoleum. He looked down and saw that, yes, it was indeed linoleum. He looked around the house and saw that while most of the floor was cloud, there was a very distinct path of what looked like various flooring, from hardwood to tiles. He noticed a post-it note by the front door, “Please stay on the special path or YOU WILL DIE! Wipe hooves, also.” He suddenly recalled a conversation between Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash about the possibility of installing special flooring for non-pegasus visitors. Angel mused at his own short-sighted plan, just what had he planned to do once he got up to the house, anyway? Stand on furniture? Turning back to Tank, he decided that it was time to get the ball rolling and tell the armored reptile his ingenious plan. Reaching behind his back, Angel pulled out a flannelgraph. Placing some recently clipped out Diamond Tiara and Cutie Mark Crusader flannel figures in the proper positions, he began to pantomime the events that took place earlier that day. Placing a speech-bubble-shaped piece next to Diamond, he did his best to represent her teasing and nastiness, while at the same time attempting to portray the CMC’s pain and anguish. Tank watched quietly, nodding occasionally in understanding. Next, Angel outlined his plan for retribution to Tank, going over every detail. Holding his paw out to Tank for a pawshake, Angel asked the tortoise if he was willing to participate. Tank slowly looked down at the hand, then back at Angel’s face. He blinked again; even more painfully slow this time. Then, creakily enough that at first Angel thought that Tank was about to sneeze, a smile spread across the reptile’s face. He started to reach his green foot out, so Angel Bun closed the gap and gave Tank’s foot a good shake. They headed down the path to gather supplies from Rainbow Dash’s stash of goodies; a can of itching powder, two paint brushes and some specially tinted pink and grey paint. Tank looked at Angel and pointed to the grey paint, raising an eyebrow. Angel pulled out a Silver Spoon flannel figure and put the Diamond Tiara figure next to it, indicating that they were together. Tanks shrugged and continued packing the supplies. Angel knew that Silver hadn’t been teasing the CMCs earlier that day, but figured that his prank would be more effective if Diamond’s fellow bully suffered, too. As they carried their equipment to the back door, they heard a voice come from the entrance. “Aw, finally! I was beginning to think that we’d never be able to get rid of that stupid hail storm.” Tank shoved Angel further down the path, pointing him towards the exit. The Reptile-copter zipped his way into the kitchen and arranged some letter-magnets in the order “BRB” on Rainbow’s fridge. Zinging his way back to Angel, the two pets flew out the back door and headed to the ground. Just before they got to “ground floor,” Angel saw a rainbow-striped tail through the kitchen door and heard Rainbow Dash express her disappointment. “Aw, Tank. Now I gotta go look for you.” The dastardly duo moved quickly through the outskirts of Ponyville. Passing the shops, they soon found themselves in the more “expensive” part of town, home to a few business ponies as well as at least one eccentric million-mare. Angel read the house numbers while Tank focused on flying straight with all of their equipment. Reaching the proper house, Angel dove into a bush and motioned for Tank to follow him. Sighing in relief, the burdened Whirly-Herp complied. Crawling their way to one of the windows and peaking inside, they could see Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon playing with Dollar Dillo by the hearthside. Angel rubbed his paws together in fiendish glee; he hadn’t expected Silver Spoon to be having a sleepover at Tiara’s house, this made their job half as complicated. Sitting in a chair by the fireplace, Filthy Rich was reading the financial section of the local newspaper. Looking at a timepiece, he told the two fillies that it was time for bed with predictably unhappy results. Angel yanked on Tank’s tail, pulling him towards the bedroom window. Now they just had to wait until the opportune moment for their righteous retribution. Several hours later, the opportune moment had yet to arrive. The fillies chatted about this and that, seemingly with no end in sight. Angel idly began to dream up ways to prepare the prank while the earth ponies were still awake, though where the pets would get properly fitting ninja outfits was anypony’s guess. Grabbing his fannelgraph, Angel plotted out a flank-painting contraption that would have left Ruben Coltberg in a daze. Before he got really into it, Tank pointed towards the fillies. They had finally sunken into deep sleep. Grinning with impish glee, the oh-so-angelic buck carefully opened the window, slipped inside and found himself face-to-snout with a very confused armadillo. Tilting his head to the side, Dollar was clearly wondering as to the exact reason that Fluttershy’s and Rainbow Dash’s pets were sneaking into his new house with supplies of unknown intent. Angel grinned nervously, “aheming” and signaling to Tank to please give the nice Armadillo an explanation. Tank looked at Angel with a frown, made a “zipping the lip” motion and pushed the bunny towards Dollar Dillo. Faced with the fairly sharp claws of an angry armadillo, Angel pulled out the flannelgraph and began to explain. And, boy oh boy, did he ever regret conceiving of the plan in the first place. The armored mammal’s face went from angry, to indignant, to absolutely flaming Furious! How dare they come into his home and threaten his family? How dare they attempt to humiliate the filly who had shown Dollar nothing but kindness? Angel’s mind was racing, he had to find a way out, he just had to! The bunny’s eyes nearly bugged out of his head as he saw the armadillo grab the paint cans from Tank, pop open the lid of the pink paint and dunk the unfortunate tortoise head first. Before he could move, Angel felt his own head pushed inexorably into the grey paint. Lifting the co-conspirators into the air, Dollar Dillo flung them out of the window before closing it, this time firmly locking it. Angel lay in a puddle of rapidly mixing grey and pink paint. He pulled the can off of his head and unconsciously began itching his scutt. So much for that plan, it would have been hilarious to see the two stuck-up fillies waking up to find that their precious Cutie Marks had mysteriously disappeared in the night. He scratched at his tail again. It would have been icing on the cake to see them constantly irritated both mentally and physically by their blank flanks, thanks to the itching powder. His eyes bugged for the second time in as many minutes; that same itching powder just happened to be lying in the spot that he had landed, and he had fallen with just enough force to break the bottle. Angel sighed; at least Rainbow Dash’s Prank Paint came off in water. The two multicolored pets walked slowly through town, partially because Tank’s whirligig was damaged in the scuffle, partially because Angel couldn’t make more than a few hops before having to scratch his behind feverishly. They made it about to the cake’s residence before Rainbow Dash finally caught up with them. “What the hay happened to you!? I’ve been Sooo worried about you, Tank! You know you’re not supposed to be out after dark, it’s dangerous for a little guy like you! I looked everywhere for you!” It was at this point that she noticed a pink/grey colored bunny rabbit doing its best to hide behind the berated reptile. “So you’re the one that put him up to this, huh? Does Fluttershy know you’re out so late?” Angel shook his head dejectedly; there was no way to avoid the oncoming punishments. “So, can you tell me what you two were up to?” Angel’s ears stood straight up; in a flash of brilliance, he knew what he had to do. He was gonna fib. He brought out his astonishingly unmarred flannelgraph and outlined his newly crafted plan. “You were gonna make Pinkie Pie think that she had lost her Cutie Mark!?” Rainbow Dash fell out of the sky, her body racked with laughter. “Haha! Oh, that’s rich! So, what was the grey paint for?” Angel itched his irritated rump again, desperately trying to think of a decent fib. He failed; who else in Ponyville had a grey coat? “Ah, never mind. Tank, you know that I’ll help you with any pranks you and your friends think up, you didn’t have to sneak out like that. Let’s get Angel back to Fluttershy’s and get you back home for a bath, we’re gonna have a little talk, mister!” After promising with utmost fervor that he would tell Fluttershy what he did that night (not a fib, he would tell her after they finished shopping for ingredients), Angel entered his bunnyhouse and settled down for a long night’s rest. About an hour later, the rooster crowed. The multicolored bunny rose from his bunnyhouse, walked up to the crowing rooster and kicked him soundly between the legs. “Cockadoodle-bwack!” Angel grinned at his own personal snooze button. He had just closed his eyes when he heard a voice call out, “Wake up, Angel Bunny, time to get ready for a day at the market!” Angel looked up at the sky and groaned; couldn’t Celestia use just a few more hours of sleep? He certainly could. Fluttershy hovered over to him, smiling softly as she coerced him to wakefulness. He rolled over, doing his best to hide his eyes from the bright sun. The yellow pegasus nudged him gently, “Come on, Angel, we’re going shopping for a very special little snack, remember?” It was at this point that she got close enough to see that his normally pristine white coat was now an odd combination of grey and pink splotches. “Oh my goodness! Angel, what happened to your fur?” She asked, gently as always. Angel started up a pantomime routine that would have made Harp O’Marks proud. Between the arm flapping, the running in place and the silly facial expressions, little Mr. Bun managed to convey… Well… Not much, really. He was getting sick of explaining himself. What he wouldn’t have given for a pair of pony vocal chords… Collapsing in a heap, the tired animal friend pointed to Fluttershy’s rainbarrel and made a scrubbing motion with his paws. Understanding immediately, for once, Fluttershy grabbed a sponge and began to wipe the paint off of Angel. “Oh, dear. Did you get caught up in one of Rainbow Dash and Pinkie’s pranks? I know they don’t mean any harm, but they should be more careful about who they surprise.” She began scrubbing his right foot, then his left. “I hope you’re not going to be too tired to help me go to market, Angel.” He sighed and shook his head, he wasn’t gonna miss this, even if it meant he was going to miss out on prime nap-time. Finishing off the last of the cleaning, Fluttershy beat her wings quickly, creating a makeshift blow-dryer for her bunny. After suffering the inevitable humiliation of briefly looking like a fuzzy white ball of fluff, Angel brushed his fur down and hopped up on Fluttershy’s back, ready for a day preparing for the salad of his dreams. After gathering her saddlebags, Fluttershy began walking down the path to the town. Looking at her shopping list, the quiet mare went over the ingredients. “Now let’s see… Fresh asparagus, ripe tomatoes…” She frowned. “Cherries… I think I’ll get those first this time.” Angel nodded in agreement. “Lettuce, of course. Carrots, definitely.” She rolled up the list so that she could focus on walking. Smiling, she looked at her pet. “I think we’re good to go, Mr. Bun.” They reached the market just as the various shops were opening up. It being the weekend, there were quite a bit of families shopping together. Colts, mares, fillies and stallions made their way through the shops; barters were made, goods were purchased and general controlled chaos presided. Fluttershy was a bit out of her element; Angel could see it from her darting eyes and the subconscious shrinking of her profile. Patting her head gingerly, Angel Bunny smiled at her and pointed over to where most of the fruit stands had gathered. The nervous shopper smiled back at him and nodded her head. She walked up to the cherry stand and confidently spoke to the vendor, “I would like two cherries, please.” Noting who she was, and remembering his last encounter with her, the salespony took full advantage of the situation. “That’ll be twenty bits, please,” he said with a grin. Fluttershy looked slightly taken aback, but quickly recovered. “Twenty bits? Isn’t that a bit, um, excessive?” He grinned wider, “Sorry, dollface, but that’s the deal with supply and demand. Sometimes, the supply can’t meet the demand.” She looked down at the veritable mountain of cherries on his cart, eyebrow raised. “I don’t suppose you’d be willing to part with two cherries for four bits?” He shook his head, “Not gonna happen, these are prime cherries right here! I could take it down to, hmm…” He tapped a hoof against his chin. “Fifteen bits!” Fluttershy smiled sweetly, “Would you take five bits?” His expression grew slightly frustrated; Angel could tell that this encounter wasn’t going how the Stallion had anticipated. “Look, lady, I can take it down to fourteen bits, that’s seven bits a cherry and that’s my final offer.” Fluttershy looked thoughtful, “Seven bits for the cherries, you say?” The cherry salespony rolled his eyes, “Yeah, that’s right, seven bits.” Fluttershy placed seven bits on the table, taking two cherries and placing them into her saddlebags. “Oh, thank you, sir. It was a pleasure shopping from you.” The stallion grinned at the complement, “The pleasure was all mine!” He looked down at his earnings and gave a start. “Waitaminute…” Fluttershy was already walking across the market, a triumphant smile on her face. Angel was giggling uncontrollably; he had no idea that his caretaker was capable of smooth moves like that! He looked at her inquiringly, wondering where she had gotten the guts. “Oh, Rainbow Dash has been helping me learn how to act confident, even if I don’t really feel confident.” She walked towards the next vendor and continued her explanation. “I have Iron Will to thank for it, really. Even if I wasn’t satisfied with the methods he taught, the whole episode really did make me realize that I needed to show a little confidence, if I wanted the most out of life.” She looked at her pony pet friend tenderly, “Of course, it’s not perfect… Yipe!” While she had been talking with her pet, Fluttershy had accidently collided with a blue earth pony stallion. “Sorry! Sorry!” She shouted apologies to him as she made her escape into the crowd. Angel raised an eyebrow at his friend, and she smiled back bashfully. “Like I said, it’s not perfect.” Passing a stand selling fruit punch, they continued more or less back along Fluttershy’s escape route. As Fluttershy once again pulled her list out to decide what ingredient to get next, somepony caught Angel’s eye. Filthy Rich had come to the market to pick up a few essentials, and he had brought Diamond, Dollar, and Silver with him. Now this was an opportunity the bunny prankster could not pass up. Looking about the town square, he searched for potential humility-inducing setups. As he searched, he noticed a little red wagon rumble down Mane Street; a little red wagon being pulled by a scooter and carrying three excited fillies. The trickster grinned; he would never have dared to hope that this day could go so well. “Yes, and I’ll take two bags of the feed, please.” Angel looked and saw that Fluttershy had bought two bags of those nasty dried mulch pellets that Equestria had the audacity to call “pet food.” He also noticed that, before her voice had interrupted his thoughts, she had bought a small bag of treats to be given sparingly to her animals. Sneaking the treat bag out of her saddlebags and behind his back, Angel took his chance. The bunny nudged Fluttershy and pointed over to where the objects of his displeasure were playing. Fluttershy, still unaware of her pet’s intent, smiled and spoke, “Would you like to go over and play with your friends while I finish shopping?” He smiled sweetly and nodded. Sniggering evilly, Angel Bun hopped over to the punch vendor next to where the snooty trio was playing and tossed one treat halfway between the fillies and the stall. As planned, Dollar Dillo’s keen nose picked up on the savory treat; he waddled over and began to munch. While Dollar devoured the unexpected treat, Angel tossed another treat halfway between the first treat and the stall. Discovering another unexpected treat, the happy armadillo closed the distance a bit faster than last time. Angel tossed a third, then a fourth, and then finally a fifth treat towards the armored mammal. Dumping the remaining contents of the bag on the ground in front of the stall, the devious little bunny hopped onto the table next to one of the punch bowls. Dollar Dillo walked up to the pile without a thought and started feasting. By this time, Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon had noticed that the armadillo was no longer with them. They walked over to where he was eating and Diamond spoke, “What are you doing over here Dillo? Did you find something?” Angel waited just a few seconds more for “The Scootsmobile” to roll into view, then he dumped the large bowl of fruit punch on the three assembled antagonists. A loud shriek filled the market air as two fillies suddenly came in contact with a deluge of cool, refreshing, sticky juice. The two fillies had no idea what had happened, they were too shocked to think about the why, and soon began concerning themselves with the what. “Augh! My mane is ruined!” “My tiara’s going to tarnish!” “Ooh, the ground’s all muddy!” The CMC were just a few feet away now, the Scootsmobile going at full speed. Angel allowed himself a satisfied smiled; the prank wasn’t quite as spectacular as the one he had planned for the previous night, but overall it served its purpose. He leaned on another punch bowl so that he could enjoy the scene in total comfort. “You rotten little thing! You spilled my punch!” Berry Punch’s shout startled the rambunctious bunny and he gave a start. Losing his balance, he grabbed on to the punch bowl for support. He soon regretted his decision as he fell off of the table, the bowl of punch toppling after him. Landing in the now muddy road, he pushed the punch bowl off of himself just to see the Scootsmobile still heading towards them; Scootaloo buzzing along with what he guessed had to be at least a dozen wingpower. Naturally, there wasn’t enough time for her to stop. With a mighty Crash-Bang-Boom, Scootaloo slammed into the two fillies and the two pets; the wheels no longer able to find purchase in the muddy road, the Scootsmobile slid out of control. Now carrying a grand total of five screaming fillies and two small animals screaming like fillies, the wagon slid forward into the crowd. Scootaloo was doing an admirable job steering the careening vehicle away from ponies, despite the slick wheels and a screaming Diamond Tiara gripping on to her for dear life. Silver Spoon, glasses askew, found herself upside-down in the red wagon, stuck between a panicking Sweetie Belle and a stunned Apple Bloom. Both pets were stuck between the scooter and the wagon, Dollar Dillo having managed to roll himself into a ball so that he wouldn’t get dragged along underneath the red wagon. Angel, however, was not as lucky as Dollar. He had gotten his ear tangled in the rope that connected the scooter to the wagon, and was getting dangerously close being run over by the bunny-crushing wheels behind him. Pushing Diamond Tiara’s hoof out of her eyes, Scootaloo looked to where the Scootsmobile what headed; what she saw made her heart sink. “Oh, no, no, no! Not the manure cart! I hate manure!” Scootaloo leaned to the side with all of her might, and the wagon began to drift to the right. Silver Spoon shouted above the clamor of the wagon wheels, “We’re not gonna make it!” “We’re gonna make it!” Scootaloo retorted through gritted teeth. “We have to!” They closed the distance fast; though the crowd was panicking, the donkey pulling the cart didn’t seem to notice. Scootaloo fought the urge to close her eyes, instead keeping her mind focused on getting away from that cart. The moment of truth came, and the orange pegasus held her breath. The Scootsmobile passed by the manure cart with mere inches to spare. Instead, they slammed full speed into a market stall labeled “Jams and Preserves.” The explosion of jelly could be seen all the way from the library, and it covered everyone within a ten-hoof radius in a thick layer of fruity goop. The stall’s owner, one Hugh Jelly, looked fairly disappointed that his produce and place of business were demolished, yet he seemed strangely content with the resultant jam-shower. Berry Punch, on the other hoof, was absolutely distraught at the loss of her two bowls of fruit juice. She scratched at the muddy earth, attempting to will the fruity mix back into the serving bowl. Diamond Tiara rose from the mess first, covered in a mix of blueberry and orange flavored preserve. Wiping the jam away from her eyes, she turned angrily to Scootaloo. “Why didn’t you watch where you were going!?” Scootaloo got to her feet an licked the Strawberry jam from her face. “I was watching where I was going, but I couldn’t stop!” Diamond snorted aggressively, “Why not!?” Silver Spoon tapped a Raspberry flavored hoof on her friend’s shoulder and pointed across the market. Diamond Tiara looked at Berry Punch just in time to see her shout to the heavens in anguish. “There will be justice for you, my precious! There will be fruity justice!” Diamond saw the muddy ground in front of Berry’s stand, and was able to put two-and-two together. “But why did the punch spill? Miss Punch has never spilled a drop of punch in her life!” Diamond suddenly pointed an accusing hoof at the Cutie Mark Crusaders. “It was you three, wasn’t it? You planned for this to happen, and accidently got caught in your own trap.” Sweetie Belle looked up from wiping blackberry jelly from her white coat, a hurt expression on her face. “But how could we tip over those punch bowls when we were all riding in the Scootsmobile?” Diamond rolled her eyes. “You paid somebody, I don’t know! There’s no way this happened by accident, and you Blank Flanks have always been jealous of me!” “Jealous!?” Apple Bloom interjected angrily, spewing lemon flavored preserve with each syllable. “Why would ah be jealous of a couple of hoity-toity, stuck-up, half-wit prissy pants!?” “My money, my popularity, my good looks?” Diamond smiled through the orange goo sliding down her face. “My Cutie Mark?” Apple Bloom glared at her opponent. “If ah had a choice between your Cutie Mark and no Cutie mark, ah’d be happy to be a Blank Flank the rest of my life! Who needs a special talent for wearing tiaras, anyway?” Diamond rolled her eyes again. They were just this side of rolling completely out of her head. “My talent is making tiaras, you dolt!” Angel noticed that she was getting that venomous look in her eyes again. “And you know what? I think you’re going to get your wish of never having a Cutie Mark! Enjoy having a Blank Flank for the rest of your sad little life!” Apple Bloom snorted, hoof pawing the ground as if she was ready to charge. “Ah’d gladly give up mah Cutie Mark if it meant ah’d never have to see the likes of you again!” Diamond Tiara sniffed with her nose in the air, her evil grin widening. “You’d be a foal to do that; everypony knows that anypony who doesn’t have a Cutie Mark can never be anything but Lame!” Diamond got in Apple Bloom’s face. “You’re lame, your friends are lame, and your stupid little crusade is lame. You’re lame because you don’t have any talent, and you Never Will!” Diamond held her head up in triumph; Angel had seen that same expression once before, when he was about to be eaten by a nasty timber wolf. Diamond felt a little nudge at her hoof and looked down. Her pet, Dollar Dillo, was staring at her with his beady little eyes, a single tear dripping out past the collected jam. Angel wondered what was going on until he realized that this was the first time the armadillo had seen Diamond Tiara putting other ponies down. She was probably breaking his little armadillo heart. Diamond looked down at her companion and asked, “What? What’s up?” More tears started dripping down Dollar’s face, Diamond couldn’t understand why. “Why are you crying, Dollar? What’s the matter, are you hurt?” Dollar wiped the jelly off of the side of his armor and pointed to the clean spot. “What is it? I don’t see anything! What’s wrong?” Dollar continued to point at the spot, the armadillo’s tears threatened to turn into crocodile tears. “I don’t see anything Dollar! There’s nothing there! It’s clean! It’s Empty! It’s-!” She stopped, looking like she had been hit by a ton of bricks. “It’s Blank.” The tears streamed freely down her pet’s face, and she realized that while she had been targeting Apple Bloom, she had accidently hurt her new friend. “But… But I didn’t mean you! I mean, Armadillos can’t even get Cutie-!” She tried to fix it, but Dollar Dillo just wept harder. Angel saw his chance to escape and started to hop away, but Scootaloo saw him leaving and stepped on his tail. The look she gave him said something along the lines of, “I don’t know why you’re here, but I know you had something to do with it!” He crossed his paws and continued watching the scene. Diamond had started to tear up as well, “I… I’m sorry Dillo; I didn’t mean to hurt you! I didn’t even think… I’m sorry.” The armadillo couldn’t even look at her; Dollar started his way down the street towards where Filthy Rich stood. The wealthy pony could see the scene, but stood, as was typical for these situations, just out of earshot. Diamond called out to her retreating pet, “I said I’m sorry! I’m sorry for calling you names! I’m sorry for hurting you…” Filthy looked at the armadillo, and then looked to his daughter. “Diamond, would you come here please? You can explain all this while I get you cleaned up.” Eyes to the ground, Diamond followed her father’s orders, Silver Spoon trailing behind. She looked back once, seeing the Cutie Mark Crusaders piling into their vehicle. She shot a nasty face in their direction, but none of them noticed. Dejectedly, she walked up to Mr. Rich and was led away to her house. Angel Bunny tiptoed away from the scene of the accident, keen to get away from anypony who might have seen him knock over the punch bowls. He got about five steps before he heard Fluttershy talking with another pony. Talking with actually being closer to being talked at. “Is that little monster yours!?” “Um, yes, but-” “How do you explain his actions? Do you know how much fruit punch costs these days!?” “Well, kind of, but-” “So what are you going to do about it? Huh? You gonna answer me?” “Yes.” “So answer me!” “Okay.” “What are you gonna do about it?” Berry Punch was on the verge of blowing a blood vessel. “I’ll pay for the spilled punch.” “All of it!?” “Um… yes?” “Then pay up, sister!” Fluttershy quickly shelled out the bits and walked over to Jams and Preserves. She addressed the pony that ran the stand, “Um, excuse me, Mr. Jelly?” Hugh Jelly was sitting in the midst of the wreckage of his business, smiling strangely as the jam dripped down his face. Fluttershy spoke a second time, “Um, are you all right, Mr. Jelly?” The stallion continued to smile, seemingly unaware of the carnage around him. Fluttershy tried again, “Do… Do you want me to pay for the damages, Mr. Jelly?” He looked up at her suddenly and spoke through a mouth of full of pineapple, “Huh? Oh, sure.” Tossing the bits into an empty jar, Fluttershy quickly grabbed Angel and carried the bunny away from the market as fast as her wings could take her. Once they were a suitable distance from the Mane Street Market, Fluttershy sat Angel down and began to scrub him off in the river, dressing him down at the same time. “Angel, I’m very disappointed in you, you could have seriously hurt those girls! And you hurt Berry Punch when you knocked over the drinks that she worked so hard to make.” She began drying him off and continued her admonishment. “Your behavior today was unacceptable! Dumping punch on ponies is bad enough, but doing it to humiliate them? Just because you don’t like them?” She shook her head sadly. “Angel, I’m going to have to ground you for a month.” Angel gasped, this was horrible news. This was awful news! This was right up there with learning that the night would last forever! He tried to voice his objections though pantomime, but Fluttershy stopped him. “No ‘buts,’ you have to accept the consequences of your actions.” Angel moped the entire way home. How was Fluttershy supposed to come out of her shell without him, her anti-conscience? He couldn’t just let her sink into her shell like she always did. A sudden thought hit him; he tapped Fluttershy’s shoulder, and then pointed at the grocery list in her bag. “I’m sorry Angel,” she replied. “But I had to spend the extra bits to pay for the damage you caused. We can’t get the super-special salad this time.” You could have torn Angel’s heart out and it would have hurt less. And, of course, he had nopony to blame but himself. The two of them spent the rest of the walk home in silence, neither of them really wanting to continue the discussion any further. > Keeping Up Appearances > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- A hush settled across the land as Luna’s night fell upon Ponyville. It felt as if even the nocturnal creatures were taking a moment to appreciate the stillness of the new evening. As the moon rose, a lone pegasus pony could be seen walking down the path to Angel’s house. She had clearly seen better days; her mane was frazzled, her eyes had bags beneath them, and her wings were practically dragging on the ground. Angel watched from an open window as she plodded her way up to the door. The small bunny quickly hopped up on a dresser to dust off the last of the flower pots he needed to clean. Running over to the door, he opened it just in time to welcome Fluttershy back home. The yellow pegasus smiled and wearily rubbed Angel’s head. “Hello, Angel Bun, did you get all of your chores done?” Angel nodded in the affirmative. Two weeks had passed since his little incident in the market. As part of his punishment, Angel was given chores to occupy his time while he remained grounded. The daily trudge was more than enough to make him regret his little pranks. Fluttershy yawned and flopped down on the couch, saddlebags left by the door. Angel quickly leaped over to the dresser to get a comb for Fluttershy’s hair. He sat beside her and brushed while she shared the events of her day. “There was so much to do today, Angel. Tank the Tortoise had the flu, Screwloose was having another breakdown, the fish in the pond were getting seasick…” The butter-yellow pegasus laid her chin on her folded hooves. “I don’t know what I’m going to do if I have another day like this tomorrow.” Angel placed the brush on a small table next to the couch. He sped over to the counter where he had left today’s mail, and brought it to Fluttershy. Thanking him, she began to wearily go over her latest batch. Pamphlets advertising retirement homes, market stalls, and aging cream found themselves tossed into a wastebasket. When she had finished, two remained; an officious looking letter sealed with an intricate wax seal, and a slightly more personal-looking letter. Picking up the latter, Fluttershy began to read, “Mayor Mare is cancelling my appointment tomorrow. She figured out that her beta fish was so grumpy because she set him next to a mirror!” She smiled a bit before yawning again. “This means that my day won’t be nearly as busy as I thought. I might even be able to do something fun with my friends.” She turned her head to the sealed envelope and carefully removed the wax. Angel took the red blob from the winged pony and examined it. It wasn’t a seal he recognized immediately, but it had a familiarity about it. He had seen it before, and from what he remembered about the experience, it was not pleasant. “Prissy Palette and Salacious P. Boysenberry cordially invite you to this year’s Ponyville Art Show. Filled with art new and old, there’s something for everypony. Support local and budding artists with donations.” Fluttershy let out a strained sigh, “Prissy Palette invited me? Well, it’s tomorrow afternoon, so I could go.” She turned to Angel and let the letter drop. “But that’s just too many ponies for me, especially when I don’t know anypony there.” Angel rolled his eyes and pointed at the bolded names near the top of the invitation. Fluttershy gulped, “I, ah… I don’t think that my old art teacher really counts, Angel, dear.” He nodded in agreement, yet sighed in defeat. It was in his expert opinion that Fluttershy desperately needed to get out and have fun more often. Maybe she could even meet some new ponies along the way. Her own group of friends was good, sure, but that was most defiantly a closed circle that wasn’t going to grow any time soon. Looking down at the invitation, he noticed some fine print etched on the back. The bunny turned to Fluttershy to show her the fine print, but she had already made her way to the bedroom. He rushed after the droopy pegasus and tried to show her the invitation. “Angel, sweetie, I really need to get to sleep.” He hopped up on the nightstand next to the bed and attempted to point out that she hadn’t finished reading the invitation. Fluttershy rolled on her side and closed her eyes. Angel took the candle from the hallway and brought it into the bedroom, beginning to feel frustration rise. He placed the candle in front of the sleeping pegasus, then proceeded to pound his foot against the bedpost. Fluttershy opened her eyes and frowned at the offending bunny. “Angel, I don’t want to go to the art show, and that’s final.” Angel tossed the invitation into the air with a groan, giving up entirely. The letter slowly floated down to sit across Fluttershy’s eyes. She lifted the invitation and read the microscopic print carefully. “Decorations provided by Rarity of Ponyville. Event planning by Pinkie Pie, Premier Party Planner.” She thought for a moment, then spoke to the bunny rabbit leaving the room dejectedly, “Well, if two of my friends are going to be there, maybe I should go. It would be a nice change of pace from working every day…” Angel slapped himself hard. He decided to chalk this up to a moral victory and continued on his way to the bunnyhouse. Grounded or not, he was going to accompany Fluttershy to the art show, by fair means or foul. My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fan Fiction Angelic Disposition: Part Two Keeping Up Appearances Angel kept a stiff upper lip as he assisted Fluttershy with the most incomprehensible activity known to man or beast. Fluttershy came out from behind the privacy curtain dressed in yet another outfit, contemplating its pros and cons. She looked at Angel to gauge his opinion of the lime green dress, and he shook his head. She walked back behind the curtain to grab a new set of clothes. He wished to be somewhere else, anywhere else, but this was for posterity. She came out wearing a light blue dress that complemented her eyes and twirled a bit. “What do you think of this one?” Angel hopped down to examine it up close. The dress was silky, with a veil-like skirt over it. The back was v-shaped, tapering down to just beneath her wings. A blue flower in her hair completed the look. As he passed by the back, he carefully tugged at the secret pocket that he had sewn between the dress and the veil. Perfect. He gave a nod of appreciation, and hopped back up to his perch on the nightstand. “You really think I should wear this one? What about this dress I wore at the royal wedding?” The bunny shook his head; he hadn’t dared to modify that dress. As Fluttershy walked over to the mirror to inspect her outfit, Angel mentally prepared himself to sneak to the party. He had to remain out of sight, yet ready to assist his timid friend at a moment’s notice. This was not a mission for the faint of heart. The sound of a hoof knocking against the front door made its way to the bedroom. Fluttershy turned and began making her way to answer, but just as she said “I’ll get it,” Angel Bun dashed to the door and flung it open to greet their visitor. Diamond Tiara stood in the doorway opposite to the bunny. She opened her mouth to speak, but found the door abruptly shut in her face. Angel walked into the living room, dusting off his paws and looking proud at his bully-banishment. “Angel Bunny! That is not how we treat visitors!” Fluttershy’s face was the picture of disappointment. Angel quickly moved out of the way as his caretaker trotted up to the door and opened it once more. “Diamond Tiara, what a surprise! Please come in. Would you like a cookie?” Diamond Tiara looked surprised. Whatever she had wanted to say to Fluttershy, it clearly got jumbled up when the yellow pony spoke. “I, er, that is…” “It’s alright,” Fluttershy smiled at the pink filly. “Why don’t you come in and you can tell me why you’re here?” Diamond nodded and walked into the house. Angel took a moment to snigger at the thought that she had not crossed the threshold until invited in. Fluttershy sent a quick glare in his direction and pointed towards the kitchen. Huffing in indignation, he crossed his paws and refused to budge. His caretaker pointed from her eyes to the bunny rabbit across the room. Angel got the message. Returning from the kitchen with a plate of cookies, Angel found Diamond Tiara sitting in the chair that was facing the couch. He placed the cookies on a coffee table, and began to listen in. It seem like Diamond had just finished a summary of the events leading up to the marketplace mash-up. “…And now he won’t even look at me anymore! You’re the pet expert! There’s got to be something you can do!” The pink filly took a deep breath before concluding, “Please.” Angel blinked; the normally snotty little girl actually seemed to be sincere. Fluttershy looked nervous. This was nothing new for the pegasus, but this was more than just a general dislike of the spotlight. She had the look of a pony who was about to say something that they knew wasn’t going to be accepted. “I’m sorry, Diamond, but there’s nothing I can do.” Diamond Tiara opened her mouth to protest, but Fluttershy held up a hoof. “’I said: there is nothing that I can do.’” She looked right into the frustrated child’s eyes. “Because only you can fix this.” Confused, the purple-maned Earth Pony looked down at her hooves. “What can I do?” “Do you understand why Dollar Dillo doesn’t want to be by you?” Fluttershy asked quietly. Diamond scrunched her face up, “Because he thinks I was mean to him.” “No,” Fluttershy shook her head slowly. “It’s because he is afraid of you.” “What!?” Diamond leaped up in outrage. “There’s nothing scary about me!” “Diamond, he isn’t scared of you,” Fluttershy interrupted. “He’s seen you hurt other’s feelings on purpose, and he’s afraid that you will hurt him, too.” The heiress to the Rich family fortune scowled, “But I would never hurt my friend! Not on purpose!” “So, you need to prove it to him,” Fluttershy got up from the couch and walked over to Diamond Tiara. “Show Dollar that you’ve decided not to hurt him.” “How am I supposed to do that!?” “By showing everyone a little kindness.” Her tiara sagged as Diamond Tiara’s ears flopped back onto her head aggressively. “You mean those Cutie Mark Crusaders, don’t you?” “That’s a good place to start, yes,” Fluttershy chewed at her bottom lip. “But it shouldn’t stop there.” “Are you saying I’ve been anything less than super-sweet to eveypony, you cloud-headed pegasus!?” Diamond glared at Fluttershy before she realized what she had just said. She was rotten, yes, but until now she had never talked down to a grownup before. Diamond looked like she had more to say, but stepped down from the chair and walked to the door. Mumbling something along the lines of “Thanks for the cookies,” she let herself out. Fluttershy looked like she was on the verge of tears. She looked to Angel and gave a sigh. “She’ll have to decide for herself if she wants to change.” The gentle pegasus wiped a droplet from her eye. Angel mused for a moment. Did someone like Diamond Tiara, who had been a right little terror for most of her life, have the capacity to change? Unlikely, he decided. Fluttershy dried her tears and looked at her sundial, “Oh my, it’s time to head over to the Art Show. This day is going by so fast!” The flight to the hall, rented for the show, was a quick one. Angel kept himself warm inside his little pocket, and his pegasus friend was none the wiser. Fluttershy always liked to arrive a few minutes early, just to be sure that she would not be late; that would be rude. She touched down just outside the main entrance. Angel could feel her looking around for a few moments before she caught a glimpse of the “Welcome!” sign posted on the door. “Well, here goes…” The yellow pegasus trotted into the hall. Rarity had gone all out with the decorations here; streamers hung from the ceiling, flower bouquets dotted the hall, and the walls were specially decorated to each represent a certain style of art. A buffet table lay in the center of the room, bursting with salads and confectionary delights. On the other side of the room there stood a large archway, leading into the Art Gallery proper. In that archway stood a white-coated mare with a meticulously-curled purple mane. She seemed to be putting the finishing touches on the entryway; levitating streamers one by one for inspection, and then attaching them to the frame. The mare hummed quietly to herself as she connected the last brightly-colored ribbon to the top, tying it into a bow. Looking satisfied with her work, the smiling pony turned towards the main entrance to see which of the invited guests had arrived. “Fluttershy, darling, I’m so glad you decided to come!” With her friend calling out to her, Fluttershy trotted forward and met Rarity half-way. “Hello, Rarity, I hope I’m not too early.” “Nonsense, I couldn’t think of a better time! I’ve just finished my job, and now we can talk until the party begins,” A nervous look crossed the unicorn’s face. “Once it starts, I’m going to have to get busy promoting Carousel Boutique, I absolutely refuse to pass up an opportunity like this. You understand, don’t you?” “Of course,” Fluttershy replied. “And I’ll help in any way that I can!” Rarity smiled at her friend. “Thank you Fluttershy. Now tell me what’s happened with that miscreant pet of yours.” Fluttershy turned her head aside, “I’d rather not talk about him when he’s not here.” Rarity’s head tilted to the side, “Why ever not?” The butter-yellow pegasus shrugged, “Angel already feels bad for what he’s done. If he hears that I’ve been talking about him, well, that would just be salt on the wound.” Angel Bunny smiled a little at that, no one could ever say Fluttershy didn’t care about others. EVER. “Well, I suppose it wouldn’t be right to pry then.” The generous unicorn raised a hoof. “So what have you been doing with yourself?” Angel bunny knew all about what Fluttershy had been doing with herself. Hoisting himself carefully out of the pocket, he slowly put some distance between himself and the chatting mares. He had gotten a measly five hoof-widths away when he was spooked out of his fur by the sudden appearance of one monochromatically-pink colored Earth Pony mare. “Hi, Fluttershy! I’m so glad you could make it! Do you know why Missy Prissy invited you? Do yah? Do yah? Do yah?” Pinkie Pie all but jumped on her timid friend. She bounced around, singing a song with no words. She suddenly stopped moving and stared straight into Fluttershy’s eyes. “Well, do yah!?” “Because…” Fluttershy’s brain had momentarily shut down due to the bubbly pony’s surprise appearance. “Because of my brief modeling career?” “Yes! She got it in one guess! How cool is that?” She asked Rarity without really expecting an answer. “Of course, if she didn’t know, would I have known? What if I knew something about her that she didn’t know? What if she knew that I knew, but didn’t know about it herself? Would you feel bad if that was true, Fluttershy?” “I… Don’t think so.” Rarity decided to take this moment to rescue the pegasus before she seized up from confusion. “Well, isn’t the party about to start, Pinkie? You do still have to oversee it to make sure everything goes smoothly.” “That’s right, Rarity!” Pinkie smiled, then continued. “Aaaaaand, I still need to thank you for all of your help planning the events today.” The not-quite-rational pony let out a sudden gush of air, like she had just been punched in the gut. Sucking in an equally big breath, she let out a gasp of realization. Spinning on her back hooves, she sped off into the distance. Fluttershy watched her pinkish friend vacate the premises. Turning to Rarity, she tilted her head quizzically. Rarity could only shrug back. Continuing the walk towards the buffet table, they chatted about whatever came to mind. Well, Rarity chatted; Fluttershy mostly nodded her head. Angel hid beneath the table, munching on a purloined carrot and some fresh spinach. He gazed between a slit in the tablecloth and took in the surroundings. Rarity had really outdone herself this time. He had never see so many decorations, not even when Celestia made her visits. Streamers, balloons, portraits… Wait… Balloons? Party Balloons? Angel heard a loud blast, sounding akin to a party favor noise-maker, come from the far side of the room. He stared out of the tablecloth’s slit and strained his eye, hoping to catch a glimpse of the sound’s origin. Standing in the midst of a confetti shower was the one-and-only Pinkie Pie, readying her Party Cannon for another launch. She fired straight and true, covering the south corner with pastel decorations. Grinning with fiendish glee, she turned her attention to the carefully-prepared archway. Striking a match on her rear-left horseshoe, she was about to light the fuse when Rarity burst on to the scene. “Pinkie! Pinkie Pie! What… What have you done? Whathaveyoudone?” Rarity’s eye twitched violently. Angel could see fillings loosen as she ground her teeth together. “My my my my my DECORATIONS!” “Isn’t it wonderful!?” The poofy-maned pony replied. “I was thinking that since you helped me so much with the planning and plotting and arranging and inviting and…” “Pinkie,” Fluttershy interrupted. “You should probably get to the point. Please.” “Oh, okay!” Pinkie beamed. “Well, since you helped me Soooooo much with planning the party, it’s only fair that I help you decorate it!” Rarity was hyperventilating now. “I… Was… Already… DONE!” “Well, that’s okay!” Pinkie began to bounce in place. “Every party deserves the signature Pinkie Pie Touchtm!” Fluttershy bit her lower lip, “Pinkie, this isn’t that kind of party. It’s,” She hesitated for a moment. “That kind of party.” Pinkie tilted her head. “That kind of party?” The yellow pegasus nodded. Pinkie looked at Rarity and held up a Golden Grand Galloping Gala Ticket. “As in, That-kind-of-party kind of party?” Rarity didn’t reply. Rather, she was busy shivering like a Chihuahua. Pinkie looked to her decorations, then to her Party Cannon, then to the distraught unicorn. She grinned sheepishly. “Erm, maybe I can clean this up really quick…” There was no time; however, because at that moment the very hosts of the Art Show flew in through the main entrance. Prissy Palette and her husband, Salacious P. Boysenberry, fluttered on feathery wings towards the three assembled ponies. They landed, heads held high and eyes half-lidded, and walked the last few hoof-lengths to their hired help. “Oh, Rarity, you have outdone yourself!” Mrs. Palette addressed the shaking mare. “The decorations are exquisite!” “And these party balloons,” Mr. Boysenberry interjected. “Make for a most wonderfully ironic atmosphere!” “I- Ironic?” Rarity finally found her voice. “Oh, of course!” The regal-ish pegasus mare explained. “It adds a slightly childish atmosphere to a most adult and serious event!” Prissy Palette looked down at the white-coated unicorn. “You do know what irony is, don’t you?” “Um, yes. Yes! Yes I do! Of course.” Rarity nodded her head, punctuating every sentence with her bobbing purple curls. Salacious walked over to the south corner, which was now occupied by a Pin-The-Tail-On-The-Pony game. “My, this is quite the intriguing piece.” He pointed to the row of colorful, disembodies tails sitting next to the bare-plotted pony. “It reminds me of Salad Moor Dolly’s work.” His wife came to stand next to him. “Hmm, yes. I see it. Very similar to Sleep.” She turned her head to Pinkie and inquired, “Who is the artist behind this creation? Will she be attending?” “Of course she is, silly!” Pinkie beamed. “She’s right here!” Salacious grinned at the pink pony. “I suppose we should allow our planner to feature her own work, if it is her wish.” Angel took this moment to examine the two new arrivals. It had been a few years since he had last seen Fluttershy’s old art teacher, and he had never met her directly. He had heard, however, that she could be a bit “totalitarian” about creativity; if that was even possible. He hadn’t heard much about Salacious before now, except that he and his wife had tied the knot less than a year ago. Prissy Palette, as Angel observed, was a blue-coated pegasus with lemon-yellow hair. She wore her mane in what was probably meant to be curls, but came across more like a frizzy rats-nest. Her Cutie Mark spoke of her “love” of art and teaching; sitting on an easel was a sheet of white paper. At its center, it contained a rather large “F Minus.” Charming. Salacious P. Boysenberry was dark burgundy, with a bit of a mullet made from his dark-green mane. He wore a top hat and short tuxedo, specially made to allow his wings some movement. His Cutie Mark consisted of a pair of binoculars, with a small reddish berry reflected in the center of each lens. Angel mused at that; what in the hay was that supposed to mean? What special talent could give you that sort of Cutie Mark? The blue-coated pegasus mare turned her attention to the butter-yellow pegasus attempting to hide behind her mane, “Is that my old student, Fluttershy?” “Well, well. It seems that it is so, my dear!” Salacious pulled out a pair of opera glasses and used them to examine Fluttershy. “Names and faces escape me, but I never forget a Cutie Mark.” “My, my, you certainly have grown!” Mrs. Palette walked up to the yellow mare. “You have been keeping up with your studies, I presume.” “Well, i’m learning new things every day, certainly.” The shy mare answered. “And your art studies?” Prissy pressed. “I… I didn’t have much time to practice after moving to Ponyville,” Fluttershy admitted. “I’ve had to work a lot the past few years.” “Ugh,” Prissy Palette now seemed to be completely uninterested in her former student. She turned her attention to the bouncing bundle of joy known as Pinkie Pie. “And have all the preparations been made?” “Yeppers!” Pinkie shouted. “Everything’s set up, and we’re ready for guests!” “Excellent.” She turned to her husband, who was still examining Fluttershy rather closely with his opera glasses. “Come, Salacious, we have guests to greet.” As the two hosts walked towards the entrance, Angel noticed that Fluttershy couldn’t help but shudder. After watching the pegasi work their magic, he sympathized. He was gonna have to find out what happened back in flight school. Later though, the guests were arriving. The two pegasi stood at the door, shaking hooves and sharing greetings. Famous ponies from all over Equestria walked in, eager to peruse the gallery that Prissy Palette had put together. The wealthy, the elite, and the famous joined together to talk business, share stories, and generally have a good time. Pinkie Pie was in the thick of things, greeting ponies and generally making sure that they were enjoying themselves. Rarity busied herself with speaking with the various contacts she had made in Canterlot. “Hi there! Are you enjoying the party? Have you tried the punch?” “Why, yes, I did make this dress myself! It’s my business, you know.” “How about that painting, huh? Really captures the imagination!” “Why certainly, I can have two dresses done by next week!” Fluttershy, on the other hoof, focused on staying as close to her two friends as equestrianly possible, keeping herself mostly quiescent. Angel grumbled under his breath; that was no way to party. Sneaking out from underneath the buffet table, he made his way over to the big archway, making sure that other ponies stayed between his caretaker and his small bunny profile. Peaking around the corner, he saw that the other room was filled to the brim with artworks from all of the popular eras. Angel saw everything from renaissance art to photographed cave-paintings from prehistoric ponies. The guests had already started to wander the gallery, at least those not currently engaged in social interaction. Angel stiffened as he felt a hoof tap his shoulder. He reluctantly turned to face the pony, certain that he was busted. To his relieved surprise, the pony was not one of the many in Ponyville who had heard about his grounding; rather, she was a sky-blue earth pony wearing rather stylish sunglasses. “Aha! You are the pet of Fl-oo-tersh-chy, yah?” Photo Finish stood before him, her keen eye for detail even now scanning the crowd, searching for a photo-op. Befitting a pony from Marelin, she spoke with a heavy accent. “I moost speak vit her, vere is sh-che now?” Taking a moment to register the unfamiliar mode of speech, Angel considered whether he should actually answer Photo Finish. Fluttershy hadn’t especially enjoyed her modeling gig, though that was certainly no fault of Photo Finish’s. Still, they hadn’t had a reason to conversate with each other since the butter-yellow pegasus quit. What could Ms. Finish want with her now? Tilting his head to the side, Angel stared inquisitively at the photographer; classic pet-speak for, “And just who wants to know?” Photo Finish may have rolled her eyes, but they were expertly obscured beneath her sunglasses. Her mouth’s downward curl, however, told him that she wasn’t in the mood. “I h-chave no time for silly pet games!” She turned to a pony carrying a large camera. “We go!” Angel watched as she trotted away, sticking her nose between two ponies in an effort to identify them. Not finding Fluttershy amongst them, she bounded away with a vigor that defied even Pinkie Pie’s energy. Angel grimaced at the picture perfect pony; she was exactly the opposite of what Fluttershy needed. Come to think of it, besides Rarity and Pinkie, the entire party had been the antithesis of Fluttershy. His frown grew deeper as he mentally patted himself on the back for his utter failure in the “Best Pet Ever” department. He needed some sort of big break, for Fluttershy’s sake. “Ah! Flooter-Schy!” It sounded like Photo Finish had found her mark. Angel placed a tiny paw against his head, attempting to drive back the developing headache. “Oh, hello, Photo Finish.” Fluttershy was standing beside Rarity, and she was using her friend as a buffer against the surrounding crowd. Photo Finish had far too keen an eye to lose Fluttershy that easily. “Flooter Schy! Eet hez been too long!” The blue earth pony had an uncharacteristic excitement about her, and the pent-up energy was making it hard for her to keep her accent in check. Angel Bunny hopped over to the buffet table, and slipped beneath its salad bar. “I Hhcchev been lookink for you every-vere!” “You have?” Fluttershy’s normally nervous features shifted a bit. Her expression was now a combination of perplexity and uneasiness. “Did you want to talk to me about something?” Photo Finish nodded her head, smiling. She seemed to be in greater control of her emotions, now. “Yes… Yeeessss…“ She flopped one fore-leg over Fluttershy’s back and led her away from an absorbed Rarity. “Zere iz a favor I vould like to ask of you, would you kindly?” “Yes. Erm, that is, if I can…” Photo Finish led Fluttershy into the art gallery, still with a guiding hoof resting on the small of the pegasus’ back. “Vell, it seems zat zee profechinal model I hired vas unable to make it, and did not sink to tell me until zee last minute!” She looked straight at Fluttershy and lowered her glasses. “Please be my stand-in, it vould be a major embarrassment if I vas vithout the promised model.” Fluttershy sighed gently, but nodded. “Alright, Photo Finish. But just this once.” Photo Finish smiled and led Fluttershy further down the hall. “Danke, Flouter Schy.” The yellow pegasus was brought in front of a group of rather artsy-looking ponies, striped shirts and berets abounded. One curly-mustachioed pony at the center smiled softly as they approached. “Ah, has your model finally arrived, Miss Finish?” Photo Finish looked expectantly at Fluttershy, raising an eyebrow. The yellow pegasus looked at the ponies grouped around her. Some looked to her with interest, some with not but a cursory glance, but all of them were critiquing. She nodded her head, shrinking her profile down to minuscule proportions. “Yes.” Angel hopped as fast as he could, but Fluttershy was already taking her position in front of a Lemonyellow DePinchy painting. He knew that the only thing he was good for now was causing a disruption, but that wouldn’t help Fluttershy much. He leaned against a table leg and busied himself with looking around for troublesome ponies, in an attempt to keep any more unwanted business away from his friend. He jerked back when he realized that the table leg was green, scaly, and certainly not a table leg. Gummie, Pinkie Pie’s pet crocodile (alligator?), was gripping on to a table cloth by his flabby gums. The reptilian curiosity was apparently attempting to climb up to the hors d'oeuvres seated on the tabletop. His stubby legs, however, were made for swimming, not climbing. Angel smiled at the odd creature and gave him a boost to the top of the table. Reaching the top, Gummie slowly walked forwards and bit down on a big, juicy apple. Not having any teeth to speak of, his effort only produced a very slobbery apple, and one very hungry alligator (crocodile?). He then waddled over to a watermelon, cut open and filled with all sorts of melon slices. Instead of sticking his green head into the watermelon, he decided to attempt to bite down on the hard outer shell of the fruity centerpiece. Much slobber and saliva later, the discouraged amphibious creature wandered away to other, less confusing, treats. The next pony to come to the hors d’oeuvres table, much to the disgust of his female companion, grabbed the apple without looking and ate it in a single chomp. Finding crocodile (alligator?) drool to be a very interesting flavor-enhancer; he excused himself and proceeded to the little colt’s room, posthaste. Angel laughed to himself; prank or accident, you never could tell with Gummie. The little bunny looked back over to where Fluttershy was posing, and noticed that Photo Finish was putting away her camera. That didn’t take long. Fluttershy was conversing with the various artsy ponies who had watched her model. She seemed to be doing remarkable well. Maybe she had grown a little over the last few months. One pony in particular was hanging back. He looked like he wanted to walk forward but was having trouble getting his legs to move him. The grey stallion next to him nudged him slightly. “Well, aren’t you going to talk to her?” The first pony looked at his grey friend with lidded eyes, “Come on, Bruce, what would make this time any different?” He shuffled a bit and looked back to the herd of talking ponies. Bruce Mane rolled his eyes, “Because this time you’re going to talk with her, you’re going to make a good impression, and you’re going to ask her out.” Angel hopped closer to the conversation, followed by his googley-eyed alligator (crocodile?) friend. If anypony wanted to put the moves on his caretaker, he was gonna have a word or two to say about it. Gummie and the bunny approached the two stallions with care, avoiding hooves, claws, paws, and various other appendages. Angel got close enough to get a good look at the stallion in question and realized that he recognized him. Now, this was not the first time Angel had snuck on an adventure with Fluttershy. He had travelled to Canterlot, Appaloosa, and beyond. One such time, unbeknownst to anyone, he had accompanied her to the Grand Galloping Gala. He may have taken part in a certain stampede, but that’s beside the point. It was at this gala that he had been introduced to this particular blue-coated stallion. This guy was actually pretty well known as a clock maker, said talent represented by the hourglass tattooed to his butt. He was said to be the “Doctor” for all of the timepieces located in the royal castle. Respectable, handsome, and rich. Angel liked him already. Said pony ran a hoof through his blond mane, worry lines appearing on his forehead. His grey-coated buddy urged him on, “Come on, what are the chances of you having this opportunity again? Go talk to her.” The nervous stallion swallowed his nerves, straightened his tie, and walked up to Fluttershy. The pegasus turned from the artist that she was conversing with, and looked to the blue-coated Earth Pony. Angel leaned forwards in anticipation, what was he going to say to her? What was his icebreaker? “Hello, my name is Hour D'oeuvres, we met at the Grand Galloping Gala?” “Squeak!” Angel Bunny made the closest sound to Ultimate Suffering that his little bunny vocal chords were capable of. Of all the events that Hour could have mentioned... Angel looked up from his two-pawed face-palm to see Fluttershy give a wide-eyed “meep” and back nervously away from Mr. D’oeuvres. It was obvious that his poor caretaker’s memory of the gala would most likely not include the impromptu song and dance session from the beginning. Her eyes told tales of fearful critters, running in sheer terror from one butter-yellow madmare. A stampede, a disaster, and one long, wakeful night. Angel looked at the blue stallion’s face as comprehension gradually spread across his features like a stain across a white dress. His mouth moved slightly, forming words but speaking none. Angel, though not being a lip-reader in even the loosest sense, could have sworn Hour D’oeuvres said something like “Celestia’s Horseapple Pies…” To his credit, the blondish pony recovered fast. “I-I-I-I MEAN…” He began quickly. “I saw you at Equestria’s National Dessert Competition, but didn’t get the chance to talk to you then…” But it was for nothing, Fluttershy was in full reverse at that point. Angel was getting tired of cleaning up everypony’s mistakes. He hopped over to a posh stallion standing behind Fluttershy, Prissy Palette’s husband. He was scanning the crowd with those freaky opera glasses of his, and balancing a salad plate on one hoof. He never saw Angel coming. Angel planted a foot in the bottom of Salacious P. Boysenberry’s plate with a swift kick, sending its contents flying into the burgundy stallion’s face. Startled, the green-maned pegasus stumbled backwards until he bumped rumps with Fluttershy, halting her momentum and then reversing it. Angel smiled as Fluttershy came closer to Hour D’oeuvres, tripping on her own hooves as she tried to regain her balance. The smile fell like a wingless pegasus pony when he saw that Hour had decided to follow Fluttershy in her retreat. The two pony’s heads collided with a loud “whap!” that reverberated across the hall. Fluttershy rubbed the sore spot on her noggin with a hoof, “Ow.” Photo Finish about swooned at that. “Ach! Evhen hcher hchead-butts are grace-fool!” Hour D’oeuvres, on the other hoof, was nursing a sore nose and spouting a variety of profanities. “Discord’s Donut Holes! Ahuizotl’s Tail Ring! Faust’s Fragrant Forehead!” Fluttershy winced at this outburst, but kindness is kindness. She grabbed his face in her hooves to get a closer look at his injury. “Hold still, please… It doesn’t look too bad, just a bruise.” Hour’s face got very warm between her hooves, and his blue face turned a nice shade of red to match. He grinned nervously and backed away a bit. “Aheh, sorry about the outburst… Fluttershy, isn’t it?” “That’s right,” She said as she continued her examination. Hour hissed as her hoof passed over a sensitive spot. “Stable Cakes!” The pegasus pony gave him a disapproving glare, “Would you please keep the language at least PG?” He nodded, chastised. Angel rolled his eyes and hopped over to the salad bowl; Hour D’oeuvres was on his own, now. He leaped the entire height of the table and landed beside the luscious salad. He was about to dig in when he noticed Bruce Mane, Mr. D’oeuvres’ buddy, walk up to the table with a fork in his mouth and a plate on his hoof. Bruce’s attention was turned to a golden and red mare beside him; she was talking about some newfangled technology, Arc Reactors or something like that. Angel quickly scooped a pile of lettuce leaves into his arms and leapt below the table. “That’s very interesting, Miss Sparks,” Bruce spoke through gritted teeth, preparing his fork for salad retrieval. “I’d love to invest in your new project.” He stabbed downward with his fork, meeting the empty bowl with a loud clang and a scrape. Most nearby ponies turned to look at the source of the offensive noise, and Miss Sparks’ eyes rolled in annoyance. Angel sat beneath the table and giggled. Gummie sidled up beside him and sat down, helping himself to a lettuce leaf. As he munched, a familiar pink face appeared beside Angel. “Who are we hiding from?” The little bunny rabbit about leapt out of his pelt. How does she do that!? Angel pointed to Fluttershy, who was currently bandaging up a very humble Hour D’oeuvre’s mouth. He made a “Lips Are Sealed” motion and pointed at Pinkie. She crossed her heart, fluttered her hooves, and poked her eye with one horseshoed foot. The promise sealed, Angel watched Fluttershy walk away from the disgruntled stallion over to Photo Finish. Photo Finish attempted to convince Fluttershy that modeling was the life for her, but the gentle mare asserted herself with grace. Angel stared at the floor, considering his options. So far, he had failed to save Fluttershy from Photo Finish, attempted to set her up with a very abrasive stallion, and given her a bump on her head. What else could go wrong? Pinkie suddenly burst forth from beneath the table and hopped over to greet a new arrival. “Zecora! I’m so glad you made it!” Zecora smiled and trotted towards the pink bundle of joy, lugging a large pair of saddlebags on her back. “I could not this opportunity loose, for ponies to learn where I once hung my shoes. Now will you tell me where my booth lies, or must I, for my corner, scry?” “Nopey dopey soapy!” Pinkie exclaimed. “I’ll walk you over there right now! "Hey, Fluttershy!” Pinkie shouted to her friend, waving a hoof in encouragement. “Fluttershy! Zecora’s brought her artsy stuff from Zebrabwe! Come see!” Fluttershy did as she was bidden, glad to put some distance between her and her attempted entourage. Hour D’oeuvres sat, mulling over the situation in his head. He got to his hooves and trotted after the two pony mares (and one zebra), keeping a subtle distance. Angel likewise kept his distance, eager to be in the midst of any mischief that happened along his way. Gummie looked to the left, then the right, and finally followed; reasons kept silent beneath his bugging eyes. Photo Finish looked at the retreating ponies over her oh-so-stylish sunglasses. She silently signaled to her companions that they should follow her, and then set off in search of the perfect photo-op. Zecora set up her stand quickly and effectively. Photographs and diagrams accompanied baubles and artifacts from her homeland. She stood to the side and introduced her collection to the crowd. “Welcome, ponies, from far and wide! Come see the baubles at my side! Rings to go ‘bout giraffe necks, Zebra Masks for clouds to hex! And the centerpiece of this little show? An ivory hairbrush, white as snow!” Angel zipped over to a large wooden mask that was leaning against her stand. When no one was looking his way, he tried it on. He raised a small fork and began dancing around. “Each item holds tremendous worth! Great treasure from the far side of Earth! Golden neck-rings held heads up high Helping giraffe necks grow straight, to answer the ‘why?’” Hiding behind the table, Angel was really getting into it. Hopping back and forth, beating his feet in time, and waving his fork in arcane diagrams. “Zebra masks from my hometown Helped us to draw food from the ground In the midst of a drought, we fretted not These channel Zebra Magic, and a storm cloud is wrought.” Angel raised his paws up in a victory pose, finishing his intricate dance. Not a minute later, he felt water droplets splashing onto his face. He gazed up just in time to see a deluge of water cascade down upon his little bunny form. He ditched the mask faster than you can say “alakazam,” and fled to less spooky waters. What he didn’t notice was the wall-eyed pegasus waitress still wrestling with a way-too-heavy water pitcher. By now, Zecora had gathered a sizable crowd around her exhibit. Fluttershy timidly raised a hoof, “Excuse me Zecora, but, um, isn’t ivory made from elephant bones? Did they have to hurt him to get the bone?” Zecora smiled, “Fret not, young friend, this brush’s story quite happily ends…" “Long ago, a lion prince Was hunting for his food And he came upon an elephant Who was in a nasty mood “’What’s wrong with you?’ The lion prince asked Though, the reason was quite clear The pachyderm lacked Two important tools Two ivory tusks disappeared “’A dragon stole my pride and joy I’m really quite concerned Without them I will waste away Thanks to that heartless wyrm’ “The lion roared His indignation Was quite plain to see ‘How dare he take What is not his? Now come and follow me!’ “They traveled down the Nile blue And came upon a cave ‘Now stay back here,’ the prince then said ‘I will deal with this nave’ “The lion roared, The dragon woke And was given quite a start Facing the prince Of the pride lands Is not for the faint of heart “’Give up the tusks, return them now And your life will be spared’ He gave them gladly, because of the king To mess with his son? None dared “That very day Lion and elephant Betwix, a pact was wrought To always be friends To help one another And argue petty differences not” “A piece was given of the recovered tusks to commemorate the day,” Zecora ended. “Carved into a royal hairbrush, and passed down, before it came my way.” “Saaaay, that rhymes pretty good for a translated Giraffrican poem!” Pinkie stated. “Some adaptation was made,” The zebra replied. “But the soul was saved.” A very proper pegasus fluttered her way into the crowd, frizzy yellow hair bobbing in the draft. She took one look at Zecora’s stand before declaring her thoughts. “Uh! Such a sight should not be seen in my art show!” She poked at the masks adorning the booth. “Whatever convinced you that these are ‘great art?’” Zecora didn’t enjoy being insulted. “Come off your high horse, thou pudding headed fool! Of what is and is not art, did you scribe the rule?” “Fool!?” Prissy Palette was another pony who did not suffer indignities lightly. “Do you forget who threw this party?” She leaned in close to the zebra’s face. “I can still uninvited you, and throw you out, peasant.” To Angel’s surprise, it was Fluttershy who moved to break it up. “Miss Palette, didn’t you tell us that art comes in all forms?” She shrunk back as the prissy pegasus turned to her, eyes narrowed. “I mean… When you were my art teacher… That is…” The blue pegasus huffed as she trotted away. “Sell your paltry trinkets elsewhere, zebra; I’m off to view true art.” Fluttershy looked to Zecora, who was getting quite hot under the gills, thank you very much. “I… I’m sure she just needs to… Um… Get some more exposure to other forms of art?” Zecora snorted and trotted over to the punch bowl. “The last thing that mare needs,” She pointed to the paintings around her. “Is more exposure to this sleaze.” Angel looked up and found himself in the midst of the surrealist art exhibit, and began to with that he hadn’t. The melting watches, disembodied heads, and general discord made him feel nauseous. He made a swift escape. “Zecora!” The butter-yellow pegasus marched in front of the grousing zebra. “You’re the last pony I’d expect to say something’s bad before getting to know it!” Zecora stopped dead in her tracks. “What!?” Fluttershy pointed to the largest painting in the room. “You can at least appreciate the time and effort the painter put into his creation to get it right.” Zecora was puzzled at Fluttershy’s vehemence. “But…” Fluttershy didn’t miss a beat. “Some of these ponies have put their entire lives into making others feel, and they do it with their paintings.” She turned to the side. “Some paintings are a little strange, yes, but as a whole…” She got a hazy look in her eyes, staring off into the middle-distance. “Can true art be anything but beautiful?” Fluttershy didn’t notice at first, but the entire room was pounding their hooves on the floor with applause. She turned beat red the instant she realized who and what they were cheering, and ran off into the rest rooms. Zecora couldn’t help the smile that came to her stripy face. “Even one so filled with grace,” She rhymed. “Can’t help but put bad feeling in their place.” While this transpired, and before Fluttershy made her way to the washroom, Angel Bunny had already dunked his head the stallion’s room’s water bowl. This managed to clear his head of the frightening images, temporarily. He hopped out just as Fluttershy rushed in, the two missing each other entirely. He bumped into Hour D’oeuvres, who was just this side of stalking Fluttershy by now. The bunny and the stallion examined each other closely. A shriek was heard from the opposite side of the room. “What in the name of all that is artsy are you doing!?” The rabbit and the pony looked at each other, shrugged and went together to investigate the disturbance. The sight they came upon was odd, to say the least. One particularly pink pony was blindfolded, and holding a small tuft of blue fluff. Across from Pinkie Pie was a blue-coated, Yellow-maned pegasus, who was doing everything in her power to keep Miss Pie from the canvas hidden behind her back. “You’ll not deface this work of excellence!” Pinkie frowned and removed her blindfold. She brightened up immediately upon seeing her employer’s face. “Oh, hi missy Prissy!” She held out her hoof to the pegasus. “Would you like to play Pin-the-tail-on-the-pony next?” If Prissy was nearing the boiling point before, she had hit critical mass now. “This is ART!” She shouted in Pinkie’s face. “If you lay a single hoof on it, I will see to it that you never work in this town again!” Pinkie giggled, “Silly, you don’t even live in Ponyville, and I already have another job!” Prissy was out for blood, now. “You’re fired!” That certainly gave Pinkie pause. “You mean… You didn’t like my party?” “Your party is a mockery!” Palette was in rare old form now. “You invited vagabonds, your organizational skills are a mess, and worst of all…” She glared at the earth pony. “I never liked your spinach puffs!” “But…” Pinkie was near tears now. “But I thought everypony was having fun.” “Art is about feeling, emotion!” Prissy roared. “Your plebian ‘fun’ has infected the entire party! Art is not supposed to be fun! Art is serious business!” “That can’t be right,” Pinkie stated. “Art has plenty of fun.” She pointed to a rectangular painting, seemingly made up of various different-colored rectangles. “Like that! I don’t know what it is, but I feel all funny inside when I see it!” The pinkish pony then brought forth a famous painting by Lemonyellow DePinchy, the Mona Lisa. “And just look at her face! It looks like she’s trying not to laugh, just so the painter doesn’t mess up when she moves!” Prissy scoffed at the thought of Lemonyellow “Messing up.” “There’s tons of fun in art!” Pinkie smiled. Prissy Palette had enough, “Get. Out.” Just as the party pony was about to walk out, head lowered in shame, Angel Bun appeared from behind the angry pegasus’ head, blindfold in hand. Pinkie saw the mischievous glint in his eye, and nodded. “I’ll leave, Prissy. But I’d like you to have a little fun first…” Moving swiftly, Angel tied the blindfold around Prissy Palette’s eyes, while Pinkie spun her around three… Four… Five times. The ex-party planner stuck the tail of fluff in Prissy’s hoof and grinned. “Now go on, pin the tail on the pony!” Prissy, far too dizzy to walk straight, let alone aim, trundled towards her husband. He was just about to bite into his cake when he saw her fumble at him, needle protruding out of the game’s tail. Thinking both too quickly, and too slowly, he shielded himself from the pointy gamepiece with his plate. The cake splattered nicely on his wife’s face. The dripping cake nearly sizzled with the hatred radiating off of the artsy pegasus. She grasped the pie plate out of a passing waiter’s hoof and flung it at her husband. Salacious, being a pegasus, had quite good reflexes. He ducked just in time to watch the pie fly harmlessly overhead. Rarity had met up with an old Canterlot friend, and they were talking happily. “Oh, it’s quite true, Fancy Pants!” She said with glee. “Once you get started on a dress, the rest is easy as…” Fancy Pants flinched as a blueberry pie splattered into the back of his head. Rarity’s eyes grew as big as saucers. “Pie…” The entire room grew quiet, all eyes on the influential unicorn stallion. Though dripping with pie, he was still cool and suave as he turned in the direction of the two feuding pegasi. “May I ask who this pie belongs to?” Husband and wife pointed hooves at each other, both near the point of panic. Fancy smiled. “Let he who is without cake…” He raised a series of pastries off of a passing platter in his telekinetic grip. “Throw the first scone.” He let fly, satisfying squelches sounding as the scones hit the two flighty ponies. The deathly silence in the buffet room was shattered by a certain pink mare shouting “Food Fight!” At that point, all semblances of high-society and poise flew out the window. Pies soared, cakes plummeted, and salad sliced through the air. It was, as the poet scribed, a ballroom blitz. Above the cacophony of war, a solitary pink pony was resting in a streamer as though it were a hammock. She sipped at a large glass of punch and regarded the proceedings. “Now this, this is a party. Wouldn’t you say, Sir Angel?” The small bunny beside her, of course, nodded in agreement. Reaching down, he grabbed a passing fruit tart, which the two of them shared in silent glee. Fluttershy was in hysterics. The entire place had gone mad while she had been in the girl’s room. Already, paintings were being covered in pastry and fruit filling. Hay fries got stuck onto the Mona Lisa, lemon cupcakes replaced the stars on Starry Night by Van Goat, and The Birth of Venus was censored by chocolate pudding. She squinted. No. No, it was not going to end this way. She rushed to the paintings currently in the most direct line of fire and scooped them up. Rarity and Zecora had taken shelter behind a fallen table. Rarity was beside herself with confusion. “Why! Why is this happening now of all times?” Zecora tossed a prench-flavored salad over at the combined forces of Prissy Palette and Salacious P. Boysenberry. “Ours is not to reason why,” She ducked from an onslaught of cupcakes. “Ours is only to do and… PIE!” Though Zecora was ready for the apple pie bombardment, Rarity was not. Wiping herself down, she gripped an entire food cart in her telekinesis. “Oh, it. Is. On!” Fluttershy tripped over a sprawled-out waiter, covered in gelatinous filling, and dropped her paintings. Caught in the cross-fire, she found herself pinned-down in the middle of a pie war betwixt Photo Finish and Hoity Toity. “You vill bow to my vision!” “I’m surprised you have any vision under those tacky sunglasses!” The timid pegasus was about to have a fainting attack right then and there, when a blue hoof reached down and helped her to her feet. She looked up to see Hour D’oeuvres’ bandaged nose hovering over her. “Come on, we’ve got to save the Tartarus-Darned paintings!” The two ponies dodged the frosting explosion of a ten-layer cake as it splattered behind them. Grasping half of the paintings dropped by Fluttershy, the blue stallion raced towards the exit. Fluttershy grabbed the rest and flew with every ounce of her wingpower. She reached the large open archway an instant before her brother-in-arms, and the two of them dived through, narrowly missing Rarity’s fury-driven food cart. Fluttershy and Hour leaned against the wall, breathing heavily. The paintings they had managed to save were already covered in various food splotches and pie fillings. The earth pony looked down at the ruined works in disgust. “What in the blazes just happened out there?” “Pinkie happened.” Fluttershy got up and began to look for the janitors. “Pinkie?” Hour D’oeuvres had some trouble fathoming the information that he had just received. “That pony that Prissy Palette was arguing with?” Fluttershy noticed a cleaning pony cowering behind Zecora’s stall and signaled that he should come over to her. “She means well, but has a way of…” She considered her word choice carefully. “Generating excitement.” The cleaning pony, a green unicorn with a mop for a cutie mark, approached the paintings. His horn glowed, and all of the splattered food slowly began separating from the artwork. Hour scratched the back of his head, amazed at the display of unicorn magic. “Wow, how long have you known how to do that?” The green unicorn turned to the blue earth pony, smiling smugly. “You kidding? Pinkie’s the reason I discovered my special talent.” He stepped away and admired his handywork. The paintings sparkled like new. He looked into the war-torn buffet room and sighed. “It looks like I have my work cut out for me.” Fluttershy began to walk to the rear exit of the rented hall, fully intending to leave right there and then. Hour D’oeuvres ran towards her. “Flut-Fluttershy, wait!” The pink-maned pegasus turned at his shout. The stallion with the hour-glass cutie mark trotted up to her. “I… I know that I made a bad impression on you. I’m sorry.” He looked down to examine the ground closely. “I’d like to make this mess up to you…” Fluttershy’s head, which was previously tilted in mild confusion, shot straight up in surprise. She began to sink within the folds of her now-mussed mane, bashfulness rising to the fore. “I don’t really-” “Fluttershy, would you do me the honor of accompanying me to dinner and a movie?” He looked right into her eyes. “Please?” Fluttershy was about to say “no” when she saw his face. He was waiting for her answer, hopeful, yet knowing that his chances were slim. She also detected a hint of… What was it? Penance? She opened her mouth to answer… Angel watched the procession of bashful unicorns, pegasi, and earth ponies file out of the hall. Each one was covered from head to tail with a variety of tasty treats, and all of them glowered at the two pegasi who had thrown the party. No, it wasn’t really their fault that the party ended in such a disaster, but the other ponies didn’t want to admit that they were partially at fault. Therefore, a scapegoat was discovered and shunned. He had kept out of sight, no real challenge considering the mess that the hall was in. Pinkie had already gathered the janitors together, and had begun the long process of cleansing the building of dessert. He was waiting in the bushes by the entrance for Fluttershy to join the exodus. Photo Finish and Hoity Toity, the last of the ponies, exited together, but there was still no sign of Fluttershy. Starting to get nervous, Angel hopped around to the other entrance. To his relief, he saw Fluttershy comforting Rarity near the rear exit. “You’re fine, you’re fine. The cake won’t stain, and your hair will comb out.” Rarity was only slightly comforted by the reassurance. Tears poured out of the white unicorn’s eyes. “Buh-huh-hut I was to shine across E-e-e-e-equestria!” She buried her head in her hooves. “Just this ONCE!” The small bunny quickly and quietly snuck into the secret pocket still sewn into the back of his caretaker’s dress. He hoped that the two mares were not taking a detour to the spa. He was sorely disappointed. > Once Bitten, Twice Shy: Part 1 > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fan Fiction Angelic Disposition: Part 3 Once Bitten, Twice Shy Aloe and Lotus were making a killing. The two earth ponies had set up their spa some years ago, but not until Twilight Sparkle moved into town did they really break out in popularity. Since that fateful day, when Nightmare Moon returned, small adventures had assailed the town on a near-weekly basis. Many of the residents of Ponyville were able to take it in stride, but others found the odd mystical monster attack to be… unsettling. And so, the spa had become the go-to place of business to gain some well-earned rest and relaxation. Even ponies who would normally not be found dead in a spa found solace in its mineral baths and saunas. Two particularly stressed ponies now found themselves the object of much pamperment as one of them recovered from her serious emotional trauma. “Shine! Shine across Equestriiiiaaaa-huh-huh!!!” Fluttershy spoke reassuring words to Rarity as a masseuse pounded out the white unicorn’s knots. “It’ll be alright, Rarity. The disaster wasn’t your fault.” She hesitated from using any specifics, in the fear that Rarity would withdraw further. “It doesn’t matter!” The dramatic pony placed a pristine hoof on her forehead. “My name will forever be associated with that monstrosity of a food-fight! Everypony that had anything to do with it will forever have their good names tarnished!” The stallion attempting to loosen her muscles took a step back and rubbed at his sore hooves. “I’ll, uh, go get some more lotion.” He walked tenderly to the cabinet, hoping to give his hooves enough time to heal up. “And one little mess-up can ruin a name forever!” Rarity bawled into her hooves. “My name is as good as Mud!” “Hey!” The stallion spoke up, feeling quite insulted. “Mud is a good, clean name!” “Oh, apologies, Clay,” Rarity turned to her masseuse. “That was a bit insensitive of me.” Rarity sighed and rubbed at her temples. “I may as well just close up shop and sulk for the rest of my days.” “Now, now,” Fluttershy interjected. “There’s always another way. Surely Fancy Pants will put a positive spin on it. He’s such a nice stallion.” “That he is, the perfect gentlecolt,” Rarity smiled. “I wonder if… No, it’s not possible.” Angel Bunny snuck his way into the room, nearly suffocated from the fragrant fumes and heavy sauna air. Thankfully, this seemed to be one of the more airy rooms in the spa, and he decided to take up residence until Fluttershy was done… spa-ing. “What is it, Rarity?” Fluttershy’s interest was piqued, to say the least. Rarity smiled bashfully. “Well, I was just wondering… That is, considering… Maybe…” She giggled with girlish glee. “Well, let’s just say that I wish it was proper for girls to ask stallions out on a date.” Angel approached the massage tables, a look of surprised curiosity on his face. Wasn’t that one pink-maned lady who had been hanging on Fancy Pants his wife? Or maybe girlfriend? Then again, Fluttershy had all kinds of hangers-on when she was a model, maybe Fancy Pants was in the same boat? What had Fluttershy called them, stalkers? The bunny supposed that Fleur De Lis was a stalker. “Well, I’m sure things will work out,” The yellow pegasus smiled. “He does seem to like you.” “I suppose,” Rarity sighed in relief as Clay Mud began to rub lotion into her tense back. Noticing that her friend had calmed down some, Fluttershy decided to switch subjects. “On that note, I, um, I have a date for next Friday.” “HUH?” Rarity stood up on the table, sending a surprised masseuse flying into a nearby mud bath. “You!?” Fluttershy smiled and blushed, giving Rarity all the answer she needed. “Oh, darling!” The unicorn squished her cheeks together in excitement. “I’m so proud of you! You simply must let me make you a dress to commend this special occasion!” “Thank you, Rarity,” The timid pegasus replied. Angel Bunny had been munching on a cucumber when he heard the news. He pounded his chest in an effort to dislodge a chunk that had snuck down the wrong pipe. Fluttershy was going on a date!? Fluttershy!? He thought back to the art show; it was probably still being cleaned up. Fluttershy had been hounded by photographers (well, one photographer), bullied by her old teacher, approached by that reproachable stallion… What had Angel done right!? “Who is the lucky colt? You must tell me!” Rarity’s eyes were already alight with dress ideas; she needed only to find out what color-scheme would best tie the pegasus and her date together. “His name is Hour D’oeuvres,” Fluttershy smiled softly. “We met at the Grand Galloping Gala.” “Oh,” Rarity sat down. “Isn’t that interesting?” He smile had been replaced by a noticeable frown. Fluttershy raised an eyebrow. “Is something wrong?” The proper pony gave her the most reassuring smile that she could muster, but it wasn’t very reassuring at all. “I’ve just… heard things, is all.” Fluttershy lidded her eyes. “Like what?” Rarity lay back on the table, Clay having finished removing the mud from his body. He began to pound once more, though a bit more cautiously. “Well, he’s sort of, kind of… notorious among the upper crust of Canterlot.” Fluttershy’s face became lined with worry. “He doesn’t do, um, bad things, does he?” “Oh, no, no, dear!” Rarity was quick to reassure her friend. “He’s just, well, he has a nasty temper, you see.” “So do I,” Fluttershy mumbled. She laid her head between her front hooves as Clay Mud switched from massaging Rarity to her. “Well, there are times, yes.” Rarity tapped a hoof to her chin as Aloe painted her face with mud. “But those are exceptions, rather than the rule. And his language!” She shook her head, causing the spa pony to miss a spot. “I’ve never heard the like. And I’ve never seen you use profanities, my dear.” Fluttershy rolled her eyes. “Do you remember, ’So who gives a flying feather what you think?’” Rarity’s mouth fell open before she could realize what her friend was talking about. “Well, again, the exception rather than the rule.” “I just… wanted to give him a chance. He seemed so sincere.” Rarity pursed her lips as Aloe placed cucumber slices over her eyes. “I’ll give you a bit of advice that I wish I had followed myself.” She pointed at Fluttershy, presenting a comical figure with her muddied face and vegetable-covered eyes. “Don’t date anypony you wouldn’t want to marry. “Every time you enter a relationship with someone, you give a piece of your heart to them,” Rarity continued. “Friendships, siblings, and coltfriends. So, if you find someone is not who you hoped they could be and break off the relationship, you lose a piece of your heart.” She sighed in resignation. “Luckily, the sooner you call it off, the smaller the piece.” Fluttershy nodded in understanding, though Rarity couldn’t see it. “Blueblood’s still on your mind, huh?” “Yes, but only in the same sense as an annoying Pop song that you can’t get out of your head.” The mud cracked as the purple-maned pony’s face contorted into a frown. “That stuck-up, no-good, lousy, pain in the… Ugh!” Fluttershy gave a soft “Mm” as Clay Mud’s skilled hooves found a tense spot and eased it into relaxation. “Well, it’s a good thing that I have such great friends to help me.” Angel’s ears stood straight up, and a mischievous smile spread across his face. Friends, indeed. Fluttershy was going to have the time of her life, even if it killed her date. Angel watched Hour D’oeuvres trot up to the door to Fluttershy’s cottage, a taxi carriage waiting for him and his date. Hour took a moment to straighten his bowtie before knocking on the door. It soon opened and Hour came face-to-face with three smiling mares. Twilight Sparkle, Applejack, and Rainbow Dash had all received the same message from a certain small rodent who shall remain anonymous. Come to Fluttershy’s. Stop. Going on a date. Stop. Put the fear of The Smooze in him. Stop. Twilight Sparkle spoke up first. “Well hello, Mr. D’oeuvres, how are you?” Hour tried to sneak a peek into the cottage behind them, looking for Fluttershy. “I’m fine, thank you, Miss Sparkle… I’m looking for Fluttershy; am I in the right place?” “Aw, don’t worry your pretty little head, Mr. Horse Doovers,” Applejack replied. “Fluttershy’s still gettin’ gussied up for your date!” “Yeah! Just look at us as… the welcoming committee!” Rainbow Dash added. “And I guess the sending-off party, too.” “Besides,” Twilight finished. “We just wanted to interrogaaaaa-I mean, get to know our friend’s new friend.” All three mares gave the nervous stallion big smiles. Hour D’oeuvres stared back in apprehension. Applejack spoke up first. “Well, hay, maybe we should introduce ourselves first!” She gave the purple unicorn next to her a sideways-hug. “You’ve already met Twilight Sparkle, did you know that she turned her parents into potted plants when she was little? On accident?” Twilight chuckled, “Oh, Applejack, those days are far behind me.” A devious smile crossed her face. “I never turn ponies into plants by accident anymore; I’m much more specific nowadays.” Hour gulped. He could already see where this was headed. Twilight turned to the blue pegasus hovering overhead. “What about Rainbow Dash, you may have heard of her!” Twilight waved her hoof in an arc over her head. “The only pegasus alive who can do the Sonic Rainboom, that means that she’s very fast.” She looked back at the blue stallion with uneven eyes. “Maybe the fastest pegasus alive, there’s nopony who can run faster than her. Nope, no running from this one…” Rainbow Dash blew a raspberry. “Pft, that’s nothing, Applejack here can applebuck an entire field in a single day.” She floated on her back as she explained. “Pounding her hooves against tree after tree, apples falling everywhere, building up muscles… And her brother’s even stronger!” Angel snickered at the pale green color that Hour’s face was turning. This was one colt who was gonna know who not to mess with. “Le’ me put it this way sugarcube,” Applejack’s smile was as sweet as her apples. “You do anything, an’ I mean anything to hurt Fluttershy, well”--Her smile turned dastardly--“Ah’m sure Celestia’s got a nice, open space in her statue garden.” “Duh… Duly noted, ma’am.” Hour loosened his collar slightly, giving his constricted throat some much-needed air. “Oh, is he here already? I should go and meet him!” Fluttershy trotted out of the cottage wearing a silky reddish dress, the phoenix feather in her hair having been used as a base for the color scheme. “I see you’ve all gotten acquainted, how nice.” Rarity followed her friend out of the house, waving in farewell. “Good-bye! Do have a good time!” Angel hopped over to the taxi, sneaking into the small trunk. He had called in a few favors, and was expecting to pick up several friends along the way. With their help, he was sure to make this Fluttershy’s best date ever. Or at least her first date ever. The trip to Ponyville was a quiet one, Fluttershy was naturally shy, and Hour D’oeuvres was still recovering from his close-shave with The Elements of Harming Me. Angel trailed a small flag outside of the trunk, emblazoned with blue butterflies. Before long, he noticed that the taxi was being followed by a large bird. He waved the flag twice, and the bird kept his distance. Owloysius had joined the party. A cloud floated overhead, partially dimming the setting sun. The inhabitants of the cab didn’t notice the very out-of-place green spot on the floating cumulus. Shortly after they passed, the green spot materialized into a tortoise, and the whirring of a propeller followed them down the road. Tank had joined the party. The taxi drove through the high-class portion of town, heading towards the restaurant Hour had selected for the evening. Fluttershy smiled at a particular fashion boutique, its “sorry, we’re closed” sign hanging prominently on the door. A quiet purr emanated from the cat door as its owner left the establishment, moving stealthily along the path into the town. Opalescence had reluctantly joined the party. “We’re here,” the cabbie said. Fluttershy and Hour D’oeuvres disembarked and trotted up to the swanky restaurant, The Silver Spoon. “Oh my.” Fluttershy was amazed; The Silver Spoon was the place for everypony who was anypony to eat. “Are… are you sure this isn’t too much?” “I want tonight to be special,” Hour replied. He stepped up to the greeter and spoke, “Reservation for ‘D’oeuvres.’” “Ah, yez,” the maître d’ replied. “I weel show you to your table, zurr.” The two ponies were led to a table on the terrace, open to the cool evening air and surrounded with greenery. “Your waiter weel be weeth you shortly.” Fluttershy and Hour took their seats across from each other. In an effort to break the ice, the stallion tried to spark a conversation. “So, what have you been up to since the… eh… art show?” “Taking care of animals.” Hour waited for her to continue. He ended up waiting for a long time. The blue earth pony licked his lips and looked at the menu sitting before him. “They have some very good food here, what’s your favorite thing to eat?” “I like salad.” Hour paused again, waiting for Fluttershy to expand. He soon gave up. “Do you have a favorite kind of salad?” “Not really.” This time Mr. D’oeuvres was ready. “How about salad dressing?” “Istallion.” “Apples or oranges?” “Apples.” “Paper or plastic?” “Paper.” “Libra or Taurus?” “Pisces.” “Would yoo like something to drink?” “Yes, please.” Fluttershy continued to read her menu for a moment before she noticed that that last question had come from a new voice. She looked up with a bashful blush to address their waiter. “Um, just water with le-” Her eyes widened in recognition. “Snowflake! How are you?” An enormously-muscular white pegasus was doing his best to look posh in a full tuxedo. “I hev been fine, Flouter Shy! Thank yoo for de reference! It vas very helpful in getting de job!” Hour stuck a hoof in his ear to clear it out; the server’s volume could stand a little more control. “So, you two know each other?” “Snowflake and I have been friends since flight camp,” Fluttershy explained. “He didn’t know many ponies when he moved in from Hosstria.” Hour smiled and leaned on his crossed hooves. “The land down under, huh?” Snowflake slammed down on the table with a hefty fore-hoof. “It eez Hosstria! Not Hosstrailia! Vhy does everypony get dem meexed ahp!?” Hour shrunk into his seat. “Sorry.” Fluttershy touched Snowflake’s shoulder to get his attention away from her date. “How is Featherweight doing?” Snowflake’s grin could have curdled cheese. “My son eez getting top marks een heez class! All thanks to Cheerilee and yoo, for mentioning dat study book.” He wrote down Fluttershy’s drink order as he continued. “Ak-too-all-ee, he eez here tonight! When I vork here he studeez weeth heez friend, Seelver Spoon!” Angel and company crept into the kitchens, several supplies in hand. Owloysius carried Twilight’s best silverware, Tank had several small instruments, and Opalescence had snuck in some of Rarity’s finest silk handkerchiefs. Angel wore a large chef’s hat and hefted a ladle. He watched the restaurant’s chef from a dark corner, waiting for the proper moment to strike. The bunny signaled Owloysius, and the owl gave a loud “Who!” The cook turned at the odd sound. “Huh? Who’s there?” “Who!” “You know who!” The chef walked over to the window, the sound was coming from there. “Employees only! You don’t have authorization to-” The chef fell silent as a large pot hit his head with a “clang!” Opal waved from her perch at the top of a rack, claws shining in the light. Owloysius and Tank quickly dragged the unconscious pony away, and Angel got started with one of Fluttershy’s favorite meals. They were well underway when the door to the kitchen opened, and two foals walked in. “But you said that we could play when we were done studying!” A thin, white pegasus colt walked alongside a grey earth pony filly. The colt had a small camera strapped to his neck, which bobbed up and down as he trotted along. The filly had her nose in the air, but the smile on her face was genuine. “And we can play, but I have, like, important things to do first!” Angel scowled as the filly’s face connected with a name in his mind: Silver Spoon. One of the two richest, spoiled little girls in Ponyville. Half of the bully duumvirate. The Scourge of the CMC. Silver reached the back-door to the kitchens without noticing the pets, all of whom were attempting to look as nonchalant as possible. She opened the door and waited outside, sitting beside the pegasus colt. “We’ve got a new playmate tonight, Featherweight.” “Who is it?” The pegasus queried. He fell silent as a carriage rolled up to the back door, and a pink filly jumped out. “Hi, Diamond Tiara!” Silver trotted up to greet her friend, while Featherweight stayed where he was, trying to make his lanky form look inconspicuous. “Bump, Bump, Sugarlump Rump!” The two fillies completed their ritual, before Diamond Tiara opened the door to the carriage. A small brown mammal climbed out of the cab, looking very much like it was tired with life. Shoulders slumped, eyes downcast, and tail curled up between its legs, it was a sad sight. “We’re only gonna be gone a few days, but don’t forget to wash him,” Diamond Tiara explained. “Thanks for taking care of him while we’re on our trip.” “Well, what are friends, like, for, anyhow?” Silver Spoon smiled. Diamond climbed back into the vehicle, and it slowly pulled away. Featherweight looked at the small creature sitting dejectedly at his feet. “So, what’s his name?” “Diamond named him Dollar Dillo,” Silver Spoon rubbed behind the armadillo’s ears. “He gets to hang out with us tonight.” The armored pet tried to smile, but his face fell very quickly. Silver Spoon sighed. “Maybe he’ll perk up if we feed him. What do armadillos eat, anyway?” Featherweight scrunched up his face. “Don’t they eat bugs?” “Oh, eeeeew!” The filly stuck her tongue out, and the two foals shared a laugh. Angel stirred his savory brew. He was cackling maniacally, as bunnies are oft to do while plotting. Soon the meal would be complete, and Fluttershy’s date could be one step closer to perfect. He sipped from a ladle to test for flavor, before sprinkling a small paw-full of salt into the soup. He leapt down to the floor to instruct Opalescence to ready the serving tray. He found himself face-to-face with his nemesis, that brown, roly-poly terror, Dollar Dillo. All the gates of Tartarus broke loose. > Once Bitten, Twice Shy: Part 2 > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Angel leaped aside as Dollar Dillo charged. The armadillo’s claws narrowly avoided slicing off the bunny’s scut, instead clocking a confused Opalescence on the head. The kitty was laid low, splayed out on the floor in a semi-conscious parody of the “I can haz dayzee sammich?” newspaper cartoons. Angel scrambled up the oven and grasped his ladle. He pointed it at Dollar in warning, a small smirk playing at the corners of his mouth. Dollar Dillo responded by brandishing a nearby whisk. His snort of irritation was accompanied by a bound up to the top of the stove. Being an armadillo that lacked the powerful jumping muscles of a bunny rabbit, he didn’t make it four inches off the floor. His display of athletic prowess ended with his pointed snout planting itself in the tiled floor. Angel’s chittery chuckles only served to infuriate the antagonist further. Dollar climbed up the stove with the whisk held firmly in his teeth. At last, the two combatants faced off at the top of the flaming stove. Dollar swung high, and was parried by Angel’s ladle. A solid whack to the shell sent the armadillo rolling, Angel giggling at his misfortune. The laughter was cut off by Dollar’s rebound. Angel found himself knocked into the salad he had been preparing, his white body sinking into the greenery. He surfaced among the lettuce with a gasp. He raised his ladle to block Dollar’s downswing. They began a test of strength, both pushing, neither willing to give in. Dollar’s greater bulk was wearing Angel down, and the bunny knew it. He looked pleadingly over to the other pets, who were in various states of being occupied. Owloysius flapped overhead, trying to calm down a screaming Silver Spoon. She was doing a distressed dance, her hooves pumping. Opal’s eyes were pointing in different directions, her brush with an armadillo claw not quite healed. Tank hovered over to the other side of the kitchen, hiding from the cacophony of activity. Featherweight’s camera clicked. Angel felt himself sink into the salad as Dollar overpowered him. Death by salad seemed to be a quite fitting, and indeed ironic, fate. Fluttershy and Snowflake shared a laugh as Hour D’oeuvres mumbled into his drink. His date was having a great time, sure, he just wished that he could be a part of it. “Vell now, vat vill you be orderink for suppah!?” The brawny pegasus produced a notebook out of nowhere and held his pen at the ready. Fluttershy had seen her favorite dish within minutes of picking up the menu. “I’ll have the oriental salad with celery soup, please.” Hour put his drink down and gave a small smirk. “I’ll have the burrito de queso.” Snowflake finished writing down their orders and trotted off, leaving the blue stallion with his date. Both ponies sat at the table in silence; Fluttershy looking around and taking in the high-society sights, and Hour plotting the start of a new conversation. A conversation that would, hopefully, not be quietly slain by a shy pegasus. “Say, weren’t you one of the ponies who brought the Mexican Muskrat Mannheim Madness to the National Dessert Competition?” He smiled inwardly at his keen memory. Fluttershy replied inaudibly. Hour coughed and urged her on. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t catch that.” “Marzipan Mascarpone Meringue Madness,” she repeated. Her seemingly-perpetual blush deepened as realization dawned on Hour’s face. “But you were really close.” “Yes,” he replied with a frown. “Aheh. I just happened to be one of the judges at that function.” “That’s nice,” Fluttershy said. “Did you enjoy the dessert?” “I should say so!” He grinned; she was finally opening up a little bit. “We did, after all, give Dinky Pie the blue ribbon.” “Pinkie Pie,” she corrected. Hour flinched noticeably, so Fluttershy added, “But again, you were really close.” Hour D’oeuvres’ mouth became a grim line. “Yeeesss, I was, wasn’t I?” Fluttershy wasn’t sure how to answer that, so she said nothing. Hour wasn’t sure what to say either, so the silence persisted. So the date continued. “What’s going on in here!?” A mare stood amidst the wreckage of the kitchen, her veins bulging out of her neck. Her eyes blazed at the two children and five pets that found themselves at the epicenter of the disaster. “Who’s responsible for all this!?” Sue Chef was well known in the restaurant industry for her no-nonsense approach to running her business. With her husband, Silver Spoon, running the customer relations, she was able to fully focus on the technicalities that came from being the boss. Her daughter, Silver Spoon the younger, kept her eyes on the ground as she spoke. “I’m sorry, Momma, I don’t know.” Sue squinted at Silver, searching for any sign of duplicity. “Hmm, how about you, Featherweight? Do I have to call Snowflake in?” “I… I think those two started it,” he said nervously. His hoof pointed at Angel Bunny and Dollar Dillo, the two pets standing far too close to each other for comfort. “Dollar Dillo leaped at Angel and bonked Opal in the head, or that’s what I saw.” “Is that so, Mr. Dillo?” Sue turned her steely gaze on the armadillo. Dollar shrank back. Angel snickered at his misfortune, but found himself next in line for a glare. “And how about you, Mr. Bun?” Angel gestured at himself with the most innocent gasp of surprise he could conjure up. He shook his head lightly, a smile as smooth as butter sliding across his face. He put an arm around Dollar’s shoulders, grinning good-naturedly and flashing a thumbs-up. Or what passed for a thumbs-up for a rabbit. Dollar smoldered with rage beneath his touch. Angel retreated as quickly as he could while maintaining his bluff. The armadillo glared at him with teeth bared, and Angel’s ears drooped. Sue rubbed her temples. “Whatever. You’re all going to be cleaning up this kitchen unless I get some solid proof-” The kitchen’s pantry door opened, admitting a frazzled cook back into the kitchen. He saw Angel standing in the line-up and growled. “Hey! That’s the little fuzz-ball that dropped a frying pan on my head!” Angel bolted, dragging Tank, Opal, and Owloysius with him. He grasped the remains of Fluttershy’s salad with his free paw, and prompted the owl to grab some of the discarded instruments they had brought along. “Hold it!” Sue Chef shouted as the pets ran between her legs. She stuck her head underneath herself to watch as they marathoned for the exit. “After those miscreants!” Featherweight’s camera flashed. Angel quarterbacked his way through the door and into the restaurant proper, the salad tucked under his foreleg. Hour D’oeuvres and Fluttershy found themselves deadlocked in another conversation lull. Hour had run out of conversation topics, while his date had run out of one-word responses to his questions. He sighed, hiding a grimace from her. “The food sure is taking its sweet time getting here, isn’t it?” A plate came sailing over his head. It landed on the table, splattering dressing and vegetables everywhere. A bunny rabbit leapt on the table and began playing a small violin in what sounded like a romantic ballad. The bunny’s tempo increased as he ran from an angry armadillo that had scrambled onto the table beside him. Around the table they raced, evenly matched as far a speed went. Either Angel was out of shape, or Dollar Dillo’s anger gave him a boost. Hour D’oeuvres was covered in oranges and dressing. His face burned a deep purple as his frustration gave way to fury. “What in Grogar’s Gorgeous Gondola is going in here!?” Owloysius soared overhead and dropped a silky napkin on the angry stallion’s head. It covered Hour’s face, hiding him from the now-chaotic restaurant. The owl carried an accordion, which he used to accompany Angel’s violin. Whether it was beautiful, romantic music or something out of Weird Al was up in the air. Owloysius dodged a flying plate that had been thrown by Hour. The stallion growled as he bounded off of a table to catch the owl in his hooves. Owloysius simply increased his altitude and let Hour fall back to the ground unimpeded. Opalescence was being chased by Silver Spoon the younger and her mother. The wily cat zipped under tables, between legs, and through the occasional skirt. She held a trumpet in her mouth with one paw, her occasional blats adding color to Angel’s ensemble. She came to the entrance, where the maitre d’ was waiting. “Ei’ll turn yoo ehntoo eh meaty-meat pie!” With a grin, Opal slashed at his tuxedo with a razor-sharp claw. He gasped as his suit fell apart, leaving the pony naked. He quietly excused himself, as he had managed to slip beneath the dress code. Silver Spoon grasped at Opal, who was suddenly elsewhere. The cat had climbed the podium and was waving condescendingly at the pursuing earth ponies. She let loose a flat blat right in Sue Chef’s face, knocking the mare back. Tank fought hard to stay ahead of the father-son team of Snowflake and Featherweight. Though the family’s wings were tiny, they were a scrappy lot. Tank and his keyboard ended up being far more nimble than their appearances would suggest. “Ah’ll head heem off!” Snowflake shouted. “Yoo stey ohn heez tail!” Featherweight nodded as his camera snapped a picture. He was hot on the tail of the whirly-herp, his tiny wings beating like a humming bird’s. He was about to grasp on to the tortoise when the critter went into a steep dive, dropping to the restaurant floor. Snowflake and Featherweight collided head-on. Angel hopped away from the enraged Dollar Dillo, the armadillo catching up with every passing moment. He tried to stay close to Fluttershy so that she and her date could experience the full passion of his romantic ballad. Hour was still trying to bring Owloysius down with projectiles. Patrons scrambled for the exits as the chase continued. Mares screamed. Stallions fainted. Foals laughed that they got dinner and a show. Angel grinned as he finished his song and struck a pose before Fluttershy. “Angel, what’s going on?” A very unhappy Fluttershy. Angel kept the grin plastered to his face as he indicated the food he had prepared and the music he had provided. He tried to explain that he hoped the date was going well using gestures towards Fluttershy and Hour. At that moment, Dollar Dillo tackled him to the ground. The bunny was at the other pet’s mercy for a moment or two, receiving a pummeling that was far less injurious than it could have been, had Dollar not been so tired from the chase. As it was, the armadillo collapsed at Angel’s side after a single punch. The two pets lay side by side, glaring fiery daggers at each other. “Angel, I think I’m a big enough pony that I can go on a date by myself,” Fluttershy said. “Now you’ve gone and made a mess! What am I supposed to say to Sue Chef?” “How about, ‘I’ve got the bill, don’t worry,’” Sue said. Her glare was nearly draconic in the way it scared Fluttershy stiff. “No, really. Who’s gonna pay for this?” “I will,” Hour said. He lumbered up to the other ponies and slumped to the floor. “I’ll take care of the applebucking bill, Miss Fluttershy. By Discord’s Distilled Dodonga Diapers, I hope you have a long and happy life.” He tossed a bag of bits at Sue Chef’s feet and bolted out the door. Fluttershy watched him go with a raised eyebrow. “Was it something I said?” “Aha!” Snowflake trotted up with Tank tucked beneath his bulging foreleg. “I hev captured de torteez!” He grinned at the crowd of upset mares, presenting his prize. “Iz good, yah?” Sue Chef took in a deep breath and let it out very, very slowly. “Thank you, Snowflake. You have managed to capture the least-destructive animal on the property.” Fluttershy looked around and noticed that both Opal and Owloysius were still attempting to escape the cook. “Opalescence! Owloysius! Come here, please.” The pets obeyed at once, coming alongside Fluttershy and standing at attention. The cook gave an exasperated sigh. He returned to the kitchen to attempt to salvage the remaining food. “Now then,” Fluttershy said. “I want you to apologize to Sue Chef for destroying her restaurant.” She sent Angel a one-eyed glare. “All of you.” Various squeaks, mewls, and hoots rose from the pets. All of them bowed their heads in deference. Sue Chef rolled her eyes as she hefted the bag of bits into her saddlebags. “Fluttershy, if you ever wanna come here again, I recommend getting a good sitter. Like maybe the royal guard. Or Discord.” Fluttershy smiled, nodded, and flew as fast as her wings could carry her. The pets filed out soon after, under the watchful eye of Sue Chef. Angel thanked each pet personally, except for Dollar Dillo, and waved goodbye as they returned to their respective homes. Angel was left alone with Dollar Dillo. He sucked in a nervous breath as he turned to his nemesis. The armadillo slumped to the ground, unaware of the bunny’s presence. An awkward silence filled the air. Angel tapped Dollar on the shoulder, who responded by turning away. The depression Dollar felt was palatable. Angel was getting sick of the armadillo’s mood swings. He snapped the digits on his paw and grasped at Dollar’s claw, a plan forming. He dragged Diamond pet along, taking him towards the train station. On the way he kept a keen eye out for a certain scooter and its three occupants. He wasn’t too concerned about actually being able to find the CMC; he could probably track them by the proximity of the emergency sirens. He found them rolling home from a day of crusading. He tossed a pine cone at them to get their attention, bonking Apple Bloom on the head. “Hey! What gives, yah crazy rodent!?” “Bunnies aren’t rodents,” Sweetie Belle corrected. “They’re actually a member of th—” “Rabbit’s ain’t rodents, but that one is!” Apple Bloom pointed and shouted to Scootaloo. “After that critter! We’re gonna get our reprobate-catchin’ cutie marks!” “Cutie Mark Crusader Police Officers, YAY!” The scooter spun, aiming the CMC right for the bunny rabbit. As planned. Angel raced for the station, his legs pattering against the dirt road. He beat the CMC to the train platform by a mere second. He noted that the train was five minutes behind schedule. As planned. What he didn’t plan on was bumping heads with Diamond Tiara, and then being run over by the scooter an instant later. The Crusaders and Diamond Tiara picked themselves up. A few tense moments went by as they stared each other down like it was an Appleoosan standoff. Diamond Tiara opened her mouth to yell at the CMC, until Angel hopped up to her to kick her leg. She looked down in surprised outrage. She was about to give him a piece of her mind, too, but he pointed insistently at a dismal shape a few feet away. Diamond Tiara’s eyes opened wide as she caught sight of Dollar Dillo, her estranged pet. The words of Fluttershy flowed into her head unbidden. “Show Dollar that you’ve decided not to hurt him.” “How am I supposed to do that!?” “By showing everyone a little kindness.” “Dang,” she said. She looked at the Cutie Mark Crusaders as they picked themselves up. “Um, you okay?” Apple Bloom’s mouth dropped open. “Pardon?” “I said,” Diamond repeated through gritted teeth, “are you guys okay?” “Uh, yeah. I think so.” Scootaloo scratched at the back of her head. “I’m, uh, sorry I ran you over.” “That’s…” Diamond Tiara’s face turned red as she held in her anger. “That’s okay, I’m fine.” “So, yeah.” Sweetie Belle sat in the red wagon, her eyebrows knitted. “You, uh, you have a good night, Diamond Tiara.” “You…” Diamond took a deep breath in. “Too.” The Cutie Mark Crusaders rode off towards their clubhouse. Diamond sighed and looked at her pet. The armadillo was looking at her with a mixture of apprehension… And hope. Diamond turned her head as her father called out to her. “Diamond, come on! The train’s leaving!” She looked back at Dollar and gave him a small smile. “I’m sorry, Dollar. I’ll… I’ll try, okay?” She ran into the train car, and they pulled out of the station. Dollar Dillo watched it go with a small smile on his face. He grasped Angel in his strong claws and hugged the bunny close. Angel marveled that the bear didn’t give this level of bear hugs. His lungs constricted, his ribs strained, and his head lit up like a cherry. Dollar let him go, and Angel slumped to the ground. The armadillo pranced happily towards Silver Spoon’s house, where he would spend the week waiting for Diamond Tiara to return. Angel gasped and made his own way home, glad that the night had not been a total waste. The headlines were quite clear: “BUNNY RABBIT AND COHORTS DESTROY LOCAL RESTAURANT.” Each picture was credited to Featherweight, and each was a sparkling example of the colt’s skills. The paper, certainly, would look good in his future resume. Angel snickered from his place in time-out. The chickens had been gracious not to peck at him as he shared their abode. The hen house was sort of cozy if one didn’t mind the constant clucking. He scootched aside to get more comfortable on top of the eggs he was keeping warm. Fluttershy wasn’t happy, but she wasn’t quite angry either. She didn’t really know how to rate her “date” with Hour D’oeuvres, save that he hadn’t walked her home, and was thus not second-date material. She returned to her quiet life with gusto, content with the attention she received from her animals. Hour D’oeuvres had hightailed it back to Canterlot, intending to tread safer waters. There were rumors that he planned on shipping himself to the griffon homeland to become a hermit. Unsubstantiated rumors, of course. That one-way trip ticket he bought could have meant anything. Angel mused at the news he had just received about Dollar Dillo and his relationship with Diamond Tiara. They made amends and were currently inseparable, if the amount of time they spent together was any indication. Not a day went by that they did not spend playing in the park with Silver Spoon the younger. Silver Spoon the elder and Sue Chef remodeled the entire restaurant the bits received from Hour D’oeuvres. The story in the papers gave them quite a bit of free publicity, which they utilized to the fullest extent. Their snooty restaurant was more popular than ever. Salacious P. Boysenberry and Prissy Pallet relocated to Fillydelphia. Their new art show was scheduled to open at the end of next week. There was a strict ban on bunny rabbits, crazy pink ponies named Pinkamena, and cake. Angel settled back and sighed. Not a bad couple of weeks. Not bad at all. Finis.