> Spike's cutiemark adventure > by The Cowardly Christian > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- > chapter 1 > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Spikes cutie mark adventure I OWN AND REGRET NOTHING! ...III... The Cutie Mark Crusaders were feeling a bit down...they thought working for the School paper would help them get their marks...but Diamond was running them ragged! Not only was she doing terrible things with their photos, but was blackmailing them to keep at it! With little choice...they looked around Ponyville for a story...getting desperate they walk into Twilight's library... Sadly, she's not there...Spike's there...but he's fast asleep...sprawled out on the couch... They toy with waking him up...Sweetie bell looks him over, as if looking at him in different angles will fix their situation...and then she sees IT. At first she thinks it's a trick of the light...but as she squints more...she goes beet red and bursts into giggles... "Uh girls...I think I've found our story..." She points a hoof... The other two's eye's go wide...and they go very red... Scotaloo has to practically bite her tongue off to keep from busting her gut! Applebloom just feels awkward... "Uh...Okay, I think were REALLY crossing a line here..." "Applebloom, I don't like it either. But were out of time and options! We'll just make it up to him later!" Exclaims Sweetie bell as she puts the camera on MAXIMUM zoom and gets to work... ...the Next day... Spike didn't know why...but the moment he got up today and went about his errands in town with Twilight...everyone seemed to be looking at him...whispering about him...giving him looks of...pity ...and snickering? Spike didn't know why...but he was becoming increasingly uncomfortable...feeling more and more exposed...without realizing it he'd begun to cover his groin area... Which sadly, seemed to make the whispering even WORSE... And then his heart stop...he'd seen it... "NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!" Everyone winched sympathetically as Spike ran screaming across the street toward the news stand, desperately hoping beyond hope that he was mistaken... But he wasn't... Spike fell to his knees in front of the Newspaper stand... "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Screamed a now hysterically sobbing Spike. "Spike!? What is it!? Why'd you run off like that? What's wrong!?" She zapped across the street toward the side of her surrogate son... "Why are you..." She trailed off as she too saw it... DRAGON ANATOMY 101 EXCLUSIVE PHOTOS OF LOCAL DRAGON SPIKE YOU AREN'T GONNA WANNA MISS! Dragons mating: doomed to fail or is Spike just defective? Below all this was a picture of a blown up picture of what at first glance appears to be a pin needle...but is in actuality...the death knell of Spike EVER having a love life in Ponyville... For a moment...Twilight just stood there silently as her mortified adopted son sobbing on the street, the looks of pity and mirth on many ponies face, and of course her sons SHORTCOMING displayed for all to see... FWOOM! Everyone ran as Twilight burst into flames from sheer rage! GABBY GUMS DIES TODAY! ... "Come on Diamond, even you can't say you didn't go to far this time!" "Hey, I'm not the one who took the picture." "No, but your the one who blackmailed us to take it!" WHAT!? They all turned around in time to see a still flaming Twilight who was desperately trying to be held back by Rarity, Applejack, Rainbow Dash and Mrs. Cheerlie- ...meanwhile, outside the schoolhouse... Pony's flee from the area as the school began to rock and explode- BOOM! No, Twilight! CRASH! STOP TWILIGHT! BOOM! BAD TWILIGHT! BOOM! DON'T KILL THE FILLY'S! BOOM! ... Spike sobbed as he took another shot of whisky. He'd stumbled upon a large keg in the woods a few months back and he'd been hiding it from Twilight ever since, saving it for a rainy day...or at least today when he couldn't be bothered to care what she thought... He'd already polished off half the barrel, he'd gotten pretty tipsy...but sadly not enough where he can't see his reflection... He'd never really realized it before...but his dick was freakishly tiny...before he'd just been glad that no one could see it even when he was technically naked...but now that's it was rubbed in his face and was ridiculed for it...it was a truly humiliating epiphany... Worse, the more he looked at his body...the more self-conscious he became...microscopic dick, no balls, no wings, basically a midget, chubby, even chubbier ass... All these things he never really cared about...now coming to the forefront in one wild burst...so Spike did the only thing he knew how to do...drink himself into a stupor... Unfortunately, he eventually got the bottom of the keg...he desperately tried to climb in and lick up the last drops...but instead he finds a weird looking oil lamp... "Wha? Wha's this? Is there Booze with it? Gimme!" Rambled a now VERY intoxicated Spike as he began to gnaw and lick the lamp... POOF! The Sphinx smirks down at her 'prey'. It had been annoying when Discord tricked her into servitude in exchange for wish magic...but she admired the devilry...put her in a lamp, give her conditions for her to be freed, then put her at the bottom of a barrel of whisky...thus ensuing that whoever gets hold of her lamp is too drunk to think straight... Spike looks up at the large creature that appeared in his home...and giggled...whatever ti was...it was a hot, giant girl who wore nothing but skimpy bandages to barely cover her freaking huge breast and even thiccer ass... "Heh...heh...sexy..." Sphinx just smiles, a horny idiot as well? That just made things easier! "MORTAL! I AM THE GREAT SPHINX! I HAVE RISEN FROM MY SLUMBER TO GIVE YOU A CHALLENGE! I SHALL GIVE YOU THREE RIDDLES! GET THEM ALL RIGHT AND I'LL GRANT YOU THREE WISHES! BUT GET EVEN ONE WRONG AND NOT ONLY WILL I DEVOUR YOU, BUT MY NEW WISH POWERS WILL BE FULLY UNSEALED AND I'LL BE FREE TO RULE EQUESTRIA AS I SEE FIT!" She let's out a long, maniacal laugh... "(hic)Whatever beautiful." snicked Spike. Briefly annoyed by the brush off, the Sphinx dismisses it as inconsequential and begins. "Mr. and Mrs. Mustard have six daughters and each daughter has one brother. How many people are in the Mustard family?" Says the Sphinx with confident smirk- "There are nine Mustard's in the family. Since each daughter shares the same brother, there are six girls, one boy and Mr. and Mrs. Mustard." Says Spike flawlessly. The Sphinx's eyes nearly popped out of her head. "That's...correct." She said stunned. "How on earth did you- She then shakes off her surprise. "Eh, lucky guess." It HAD to be, there was NO way a drunken CHILD could've figured that out...still...probably wouldn't hurt to make the next questions tougher just to be safe... "I am something people love or hate. I change peoples appearances and thoughts. If a person takes care of them self I will go up even higher. To some people I will fool them. To others I am a mystery. Some people might want to try and hide me but I will show. No matter how hard people try I will Never go down. What am I?" "Age." Said Spike flawlessly. The Sphinx was dumbstruck, she snarls. there was no way she was going back to that cramped bottle! She didn't know what was going on here, but she done playing around! She was going to use her most difficult riddle! "Can you write down eight eights so that they add up to one thousand?" She mocked rhetorically. Ha! What was more diabolical then a MATH riddle? There was no way- "888 + 88 + 8 + 8 + 8 = 1000." Said the tipsy Spike. The Sphinx's jaw fell and shattered the floor. "I...HOW!? YOUR A CHILD! A DRUNK CHILD AT THAT!" Spike shrugged, "(hic) My mom is a Trivia contest NUT. (hic)She once made me stay up- (hic) -for five days straight without sleep, asking her questions and making ME answer questions in just about everything...(hic)I guess some of it stuck...(hic)...so I get my wishes now right?" The Sphinx panicked, if she lost here she'd be sealed in the lamp for another thousand years! "NO! DOUBLE OR NOTHING!" She hated resorting to this escape clause, but she was desperate! "You have to give ME a riddle or a question, if you can stump me or make me say 'I don't know'. You win. I addition to your three wishes, you'll then get me as a sex slave- to mate, to marry and NEVER do anything to kill or hinder you or your allies AND I'll have to give almost all my magic up to you." Spike giggled perversely as she once more takes in the Sphinx's 'barely-there' clothes. "Heh...boobies! Be naked and you(hic) got yourself a Deal(hic)!" The Sphinx rolled her eyes, but just nods and says nothing. She wasn't the least bit worried, in addition to being gifted with a sphinx's naturally grand intellect she'd once stolen all the secrets of the ancient Neighgyptian library of Marexandria! The greatest depository of knowledge in the ancient world! There wasn't a pony alive that could stump her, let alone this tiny child of a- Hello, what was he doing? Indeed, the chubby little drake was waddling around tipsy, drawing something in the dust... WONK T'NOD I "My (hic) Question...(hic) is...(hic)...can you(hic)...tell me what this says backward?(hic) The Sphinx smirks triumphantly, she had him now! "I DON'T KNOW!" She shouts proudly...then goes very pale...Spike smirks... "NO! Wait! I didn't mean!" But it was too late, 'technically' she had just said 'I don't know'...and therefore she had lost... "Never (hic)underestimate guy who's(hic) momma has nothing better to do then (hic) use him to carry out her obsessions!" Said a still very drunk Spike...somehow. RIP! The Sphinxs eyes widen in horror as her clothes explode, she realized to her horror that thinks to that last minute addition to the deal she was now a cursed perma-nude! Spike giggled at the naked lady. She snarled...but then smirked. The magic of her PERSONAL deal wouldn't fully kick in until AFTER she granted three wishes...so she could twist them to be as horrible to this insufferable child of a drake! If she was going to be miserable for all eternity then so shall he! "Name your three wishes", she said cordially... Sadly...this was where Spike's luck ran out. Credit where credit was due, it was a miracle he lasted this long...but although his years of 'training' under his mother had helped him be coherent to answer/ask riddles or other complicated questions even while deeply inebriated...this didn't extend to anything else...and that unfortunately included 'critical thinking when regarding how to word a wish so it doesn't backfire!' But Between the booze and the distractingly sexy sight of a naked lady...Spike was barely being coherent as it was! Never mind thinking straight! Spike thought- or about as close to 'thinking' as a drunk could do -on this...then smirked. "I wish (hic) that those three stupid fillies would be my bitches! Make them feel what I felt! To know what it's like to be hurt by someone you thought was your friend! And that they NEVER got those stupid cutie marks of theirs!" he exclaimed in rage! The Sphinx smirked evilly, "Your wish is MINE to take." She said flatly...and with a nod...it was granted...with a few MINOR tweaks of course... ... Meanwhile, the Crusaders were putting ice on their poor, abused flanks as they were forced to stay in their rooms as Twilight read Applejack and Filthy Rich the riot act...from now it seemed Filthy Rich will be forcing Diamond to behave...Applejack to get off her high horse and be more helpful to her sister in her problems, and also that Diamond was no longer allowed anywhere near the crusaders or vice versa... Which sounded quite good...until they overheard Twilight begin to explain how she'd be taking over their education in all things cutie marks...they were falling asleep just listening to her explaining about her classes! GLOW! Tragically, they would soon have bigger problems... Their screams of pain alerted everyone and they ran upstairs to help...but it was too late... ... Not missing a beat Spike continued, "In fact...let me rub it in their faces more...let me have a cutie mark! HA! That'll show them! Even a dragon will get one before them!" The sphinx continued smiling evilly, "Your wish is MINE to take." She said as she caused a glowing orb of magic to enter Spike...this wish wasn't going to be instantaneous though...NO...the Sphinx wanted to SAVOR this... Spike, not noticing this...started to sob a bit. "Stupid Crusaders...any hope I had to be with Rarity is gone...she'll never want to date a loser with no balls!" He sobbed a bit more...then sighed. "Oh, who am I kidding I never had a shot with Rarity! She a pony and I a dragon! Why can't their be fifty Dragon and 5 pony!" He sniffles, "I wish their were sexy female dragons around! The sphinx again smiled evilly, "Your wish is MINE to take!" She laughs... ... POOF! And just like that...every male dragon in the Dragon lands suddenly had their genitals explode... They Girl dragons eyes widen as they started to glow as well... Their asses got thiccer... Their breasts got larger and actually had nipples now... In other words, they became VERY anatomically correct. Finally, a VERY noticeable tattoo appeared across their pussies, breasts and rears... Property of Spike Sparkle The only dragon living in Ponyville, Equestria, in the library made out of a tree. YOUR ASSES BELONG TO ME NOW BITCHES! This, needless to say...did not go over well with them... ... It's then that the second wish kicked in, now the Sphinx COULD'VE just given him the cutie mark without changing anything in his body...but the Sphinx was in NO mood for mercy... The magic began to twist and turn things in Spike's body...which had the expected side-effect of getting all the liquor out of Spike's system...the Sphinx wanted him to be completely coherent for this. Spike was suddenly VERY aware of everything and sober, "Who!? What?! Where?! how!? "He exclaims confused! Then to his surprise and delight, he sees his dick has become a foot-long and his balls were easily the size of apples... The Sphinx continued to grin evily, "Little fun fact: Dragon dicks and balls mostly stay inside their bodies until their mature enough to be sexily active. Until then, it looks like they have teeny-weenies and no balls!" She laughs! Spike also laughs, "Awesome! I'm a stud!" He cheers. Sphinx just keeps grining wickedly, "You might want to look again..." "Huh...HEY!" Shouts Spike, for as his cutie mark was forming...his dink was SHRINKING! "No! HEY, no c'mon!" Shouts Spike in horror and mortification! The Sphinx just watched and eagerly laughed as she watched as spikes willy go from foot long...to half foot...to inch...to peanut size...to blade of grass size...to sesame size...and as for his balls...well...what balls? Spike sobbed, "No...come on! Come back!" But it was too late...didn't even notice the mark now on his flank regarding the big scepter with a giant red gem held by both Hoof and claw... The Sphinx continues to relish in his emasculation...and it would only get worse if the impotence curse she'd placed on him had anything to say about it...if eh was going to miserable for eternity...then so would he! She sighs as she feels her magic being stripped from her and the contract she'd made taking full force...but just because she HAD to give Spike her magic didn't mean she had to do it NOW...there'd been no date set on the contract so she still had some bargaining power at least... Spike groans, then falls flat on his back, "Well, at least now I've hit rock bottom...at least there's no where left go but up...right? Suddenly a loud bang was heard downstairs, "SPIKE! EXPLAIN YOURSELF! WHAT DID YOU DO TO THE CRUSADERS!?" Screamed her mothers voice. "Oh, you'd be amazed how deep a person can dig themselves." Said the Sphinx with a grin as Spike gulped. ... Meanwhile, a flock of angry Dragon ladies continued their flight to Equestria... …III... TO BE CONTINUED?