One More Light
A pony trotted through the tall grass. It brushed up against his legs to his joints, tickling him a bit. At just about any other time, he would be enjoying trotting through the beauty of the nature around him, including the sound of the nocturnal bugs and the clear night sky that was dotted with stars. However, there was something else on his mind. He continued to scan the area until he found what exactly he was looking for.
Finally, after wading through the meadow, he spotted a depression amongst the grass. He trotted closer in hopes it was what he thought it was. Sure enough, it was.
“Hey,” he spoke up as he drew closer, breaking the silence.
A griffon laid in the depression of the grass. His body was stretched and spread outward, with his limbs and wings out. He looked upwards to see the familiar green pony standing over him. His body didn’t move, however. “Hey, Sandbar,” he replied flatly.
“Silverstream told me you were out here,” Sandbar said.
“Yeah, she can’t really keep a secret, can she?”
Sandbar didn’t say anything for a moment. He looked at his friend in the grass. His body looked like a ragdoll, thrown out into the grass and just happened to land upwards toward the sky. His face, there was an expression that could be seen as a number of emotions trying to fight for control. Melancholy, frustration, bitterness, and even indignation all seemed to reflect on his face.
“Gallus, are you okay?”
“I’m always okay, aren’t I?” he quickly replied, as if he had it ready.
The pony didn’t buy it. “Gallus, I know something’s wrong, we all do.”
Gallus continued to look upward at the sky, trying to avoid making any eye contact with Sandbar. The stars were twinkling and had the griffon’s full attention. But the silence didn’t last as long as Gallus would have wanted, as he spoke, “I got a letter today. From Griffonstone.”
“Oh, I thought I saw Gabby earlier,” Sandbar commented, “What did it say?”
His eyes were still fixed on the stars, “Grampa Gruff is ill, seriously ill. The letter said he’s not expected to pull through.”
Sandbar raised his hoof to cover his mouth as he lowered his body to sit in the grass. “Oh goodness….”
“Gilda and Gabby both told me that they want me to return to Griffonstone as soon as I can, you know, to say goodbye and all that….” Gallus continued. His voice sounded flat, almost unaffected by the news he just shared.
“That does sound like a good thing for you to do,” Sandbar stated calmly as he seated himself more comfortably, “It would be best for you to take a little time off to deal with such. I’m sure the professors and Headmare Starlight would understand.”
“I’m not going,” Gallus quickly said in a firm voice.
The pony’s ears perked up, “What?”
Gallus repeated himself, “I’m not going back to Griffonstone.”
“B-But why?” Sandbar asked in confusion.
He didn’t reply right away, instead Gallus stretched his talons skyward for a brief moment. “I already have so much going on at the school, I can’t take the time off. There’s the upcoming exams, and a few of those projects….”
“Gallus….” Sandbar stated quietly.
“Besides, we really never were all that close. At best, we tolerated each other.”
Sandbar still couldn’t compute what he was being told, “But….he raised you didn’t he?”
“Yeah, but it’s not like we’re related by blood or anything.”
“Still, this is your guardian! The griffon who took care of you!” Sandbar explained, “And if you don’t go, you’re gonna regret it!”
Gallus simply shrugged, “Maybe, but I doubt it. This isn’t all that big of a deal for me.”
“Not a big deal? Gallus, you left the school without a word after you read that letter. We were all worried sick!” Sandbar spoke with concern.
“What’s wrong with some alone time?”
Sandbar had a few choice things he wanted to say, but he held his tongue as he said something else, “I can just tell by looking at your face that there’s a lot eating you up inside.”
Gallus scoffed at what Sandbar said, “Tch, you don’t know my head.”
“Come on, just looking at you right now, I can tell you’re feeling mad at the universe that he’s sick. I can tell that you’re sad that he might not recover. I can tell that-”
“I don’t really feel anything about it,” Gallus interrupted.
“And I don’t believe you.”
“Sandbar, just go back to the school. I’ll be fine,” Gallus insisted.
“No, I’m not leaving without you.”
Gallus closed his eyes for a moment and shook his head, “Then get comfortable.”
The pony was growing frustrated with his friend, but he was always true to his word and would not be leaving without Gallus. Sandbar laid down beside Gallus on grass, their bodies pointing off in different directions, with their heads meeting each other. Both had their gaze upwards at the stars in the sky. The chorus of the crickets and other nightly creatures filled the air as the two laid in silence.
“Wow….there’s like a million stars shining out tonight,” Sandbar commented quietly.
A soft mumble of agreement came from Gallus, but not much else in reply.
The silence returned. It seemed like it lasted ages until Sandbar spoke up again, “What was it like? Being raised by Grampa Gruff, that is.”
“What?” Gallus asked with surprise.
“You always comment that he’s this and that, but rarely say anything about what it was like for him to be your guardian,” the pony explained, “And I’m just curious. I mean, he took care of you and all.
Gallus turned his head to look at Sandbar for a moment. He saw that the pony still had their eyes fixated on the sky above. “You really want to know?” He returned his gaze back up as well. “Grampa Gruff was nothing short of a crazed drill sergeant. In fact, I think he felt that raising me was something along the lines of some sort of military thing, and I wouldn’t be surprised if he only raised me because he got something out of it. He was overbearing, demanding, and completely distant. Honestly, it feels like nothing has changed with this news.”
“So, you’re telling me you don’t feel anything at all about Grampa Gruff being sick?”
“Not really, no.”
“But this is your parental figure, Gallus!” Sandbar pleaded, positioning himself up off the ground a bit, “You have to feel something!”
Gallus sat up and moved his body to face the pony. His voice was raised and growing angry, “You’re right, Sandbar, Grandpa Gruff is my parental figure, not yours! How I feel about him should not concern you!”
“See, you do feel something!” Sandbar returned the raised voice.
“Yeah, I feel really annoyed that you won’t just drop it already! This isn’t something you should be digging into! It’s my own problem!” Gallus shouted as he stood completely up. “Do you really think I care what happens to the griffon who probably took me in for his own gain, berate me whenever he pleases, and then shove me off at the very first chance? Father of the year material, don’t you think?!”
“Gallus….”
The griffon stood up over Sandbar, “Truth be told, I’m surprised it took this long for something to happen to him!”
Sandbar managed to speak, “Gallus, you need to process all of this.”
“It’s my own deal, and I’m not going to have some big, theatrical reaction to all of this just to make you or some other creature happy!”
“But you should have some sort of reaction!” Sandbar pleaded as he raised his voice, “For Celestia’s sake, he raised you and now he’s dying!”
“Shut up! Just shut up!”
“Do you really want Gramp Gruff to die?! Is that it?!” Sandbar asked loudly.
“I said shut up!”
“Answer me!”
The griffon looked down at the earth pony, his blood boiling. In a single leap, Gallus lunged at Sandbar and pinned him to the ground. His talons tightly gripped into Sandbar’s shoulder blades tightly almost like he was trying to draw blood. His voice cracking a bit, Gallus looked down at the pony and shouted, “We’re all gonna die, Sandbar! I’m gonna die, you’re gonna die, every creature is gonna die sooner or later! Do you really think that any of this is going to last forever? This isn’t some sort of storybook where everything is perfect and sunny in the end! Real life doesn’t have a happily ever after!”
With his heart racing, one of Gallus’ talons was raised up into the air, curled into a fist. Seeing it, Sandbar’s body entered a fight-or-flight dread. However, his racing heart was the only movement for the pony. Against everything that his instincts were telling him to do, Sandbar neither fought or fled. Instead, he closed his eyes and braced himself for the hit.
Gallus’ talon fell downward and made contact with a soft sound. Sandbar opened his eyes to see that Gallus’ talon missed him, but instead hit the ground next to his head. He looked back up to see the griffon’s face. Tears were starting to roll down his pained face. Both of their hearts were still pounding fast, as if they were trying to burst out of their chests.
“We are all alone,” he softly spoke, releasing his other talon from Sandbar. He picked himself up off of the top of Sandbar and quickly wiped away the tears on his face, “We are born alone, and we die alone. If I ever learned anything from Grampa Gruff, it’s that.”
Sandbar was silent as he propped himself back up. He looked at where Gallus had grabbed him. While adrenaline was still running through him, his shoulders still stung. He looked back at the griffon, unsure of what to say. Gallus moved back to the spot where he had previously laid on the grass. He sat down and rested his back against the ground, again having his eyes fixated on the stars above. Sandbar got up and trotted over to him. For a brief moment, he looked at his friend. There was so much he wanted to say to him. However, he said nothing. Instead, the pony also returned to the grass.
The two laid in silence as their eyes looked up at the numerous stars in the sky. It was almost deafening between them.
It was Sandbar who was first to finally break the silence. “Gallus, I’m sorry….”
“No, I’m sorry, Sandbar,” Gallus quietly said, “I lashed out and….it was uncalled for. It’s just….this is my own problem and I don’t want to bother any of you with my issues….”
“But I want you to.”
Gallus turned his head to look at Sandbar in surprise, “What?”
Sandbar repeated himself, “I want to hear your problems, Gallus. I want to help you work through them. I mean, what kind of friend would I be if I didn’t want to help?” He turned his head to face Gallus with a warm and welcoming smile.
The griffon didn’t say anything right away. Instead he continued to look at his friend. “Even after attacking you like that, you still would want to help me?”
“Of course, why would I let you deal with something like this all by yourself?” Sandbar said. He turned his head back up to the stars, “It doesn’t matter who you are, there isn’t any creature who is born to be alone. You don’t have to shoulder everything by yourself.”
Gallus also looked back skyward. The earth pony’s words had an affect on him and, while he wanted to say something, anything really, he was at a loss for words.
“If you want to talk about it, Gallus, I’m here for ya,” Sandbar insisted, turning his attention back to Gallus, “I’m not going anywhere.”
Yet again, Gallus didn’t say anything. Both he and Sandbar continued to lie on the grass. There was so much that the two would want to say to each other. Yet neither of them spoke for some time, with only the sound the gentle breeze blowing the grass being audible. The stars twinkled in the sky above.
“Back in Griffonstone,” Gallus’ voice was hushed as he broke the silence, “we’re taught that the stars are our ancestors. They form patterns in the sky to help travelers find their way home. And it’s by them working together, they can help those who are still here.”
“Is that right?” Sandbar asked, looking at the stars with a small smile, “Are there stories about them?”
“Yeah, there’s lots. There’s Graysen the Bold, a general from the early days of the griffon empire. Gideon the Great, the first king of Griffonstone. Gemma the Wise, she was one of the first griffons to reach out to other species. And you can actually see Grace and Garcias, the lovers, always torn apart by the river in the sky….” Gallus pointed up into the sky to the various stars he talked about.
Sandbar couldn’t help but have a small smile on his face, “I’m surprised you know so much about them.”
“There’s a lot of stories about the stars….but….”
Sandbar’s ears perked up as his expression dropped, “But?”
Gallus seemed reluctant to answer, yet he did, “It’s said that when an ancestor is forgotten….their star disappears….”
The pony was quiet for a moment before speaking, “You’re afraid of that happening to him, aren’t you?”
“There’s so much I’m afraid of right right now,” Gallus admitted, his voice was both tired and weak, “I’m afraid about what’s happening to Grampa Gruff. I’m afraid of going back to Griffonstone. I’m afraid of what’s going to happen. And I just feel so….powerless….and scared….”
Sandbar raised a hoof and gently placed it on Gallus’ limb. He looked at the griffon and spoke, “It’s natural to be afraid.”
Gallus didn’t return the eye contact. Instead, his talon grabbed onto Sandbar’s hoof as he continued to look upwards. His grip was tight, but his body was trembling. It was almost as if the griffon was, without a word, begging Sandbar to stay with him. And Sandbar wasn’t going anywhere.
“Would you….come with me to see Grampa Gruff?” Gallus asked. His voice was trembling just like his talon.
“Of course, dude. I’m always by your side.”
Tears began to form and fall from the griffon’s eyes. He tried his hardest to hide the mixture of overwhelming feelings he was experiencing. With his free talon, he quickly tried to stop them but to no avail. But it wasn’t just the fear, sadness, and frustration that he felt earlier: there was also relief, hope, and peace of mind for the first time in ages. The walls that he built around him came crashing down with the streaks of tears.
In silence, the two friends stared up at the night sky above them. All of Equestria drifted away for them as the stars shined down on the pair.
“The stars look beautiful tonight.”
“They really do. I guess it shows that no matter what happens, even amidst the hatred, the carnage, and the sorrow out there, it’s possible for wonders and beautiful things can exist.”
END