Maudamoiselle

by Vis-a-Viscera

First published

The Pie family's in the funnest place in Equestria! ...but Pinkie can't even smile.

Maud Pie's tried to balance her family, friends and bearing the Element of Laughter for so long. But now, in Las Pegasus's biggest casino, her house of cards starts tumbling down.


This entry is for both NitroIndigo's Secrets: A Swapped Roles Contest and the Quills and Sofas Speedwriting Group's 'Hot off the Press II' speedwrite.

Pic credit goes to bakki.

Thanks to TheHatMan, PearlescentTT, Snow Quill, and Speccer for proofreading/editing.

WARNING: Maud's good at craps, but crappy at being good.

As the Boulder Breaks

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It was only when the pink pony was before those pearly gates that she wished she'd played a game of 'camouflage' with Boulder and her family instead.

Maudileena Daisy Pie knew she shouldn’t have felt this way, though; it was selfish. Any time ponies spent with their family was a fun time. Especially now that they were in the grand Las Pegasus M.G.M. Casino. Maud had done so much for so many so often as the Element of Laughter, ever since she shielded her sister from the rainbow shockwave over the Pie Rockfarm all those months ago. Her family, even Pinkie, had marveled over her coat turning rich magenta before their eyes, Pinkie Pie the most. So why it so hard to either Maud or to laugh here and now?

Her mind knew what Maud refused to voice, though. Perhaps because your sister Pinkie hasn't laughed much recently ei-

“...aaaand 24! Sorry ma’am, you’re over!”

The blubbering of an unlucky blackjack player next to Maud startled her for a second. She took in the glitzy aura of the casino to distract herself. Strobing lights of gold and emerald covered every one of the filigreed walls. Open silver arches cut into those cavernous halls led into circular chambers, ponies grouped around green tables and golden crank machines. It was quite a different change of pace from the slower, calmer melancholy of her now-native Ponyville.

Well, thought Maud with a wry grin, beyond the power-mad alicorns, parasprites, and occasional hydra.

“Wooow…” Marble Pie’s lips split into a gleeful grin, the muted-coat mare marveling in the scenes before her. Her hooves trembled, tail twitching, looking unsure of where to spring first.

But it would be a sharp glare from Maud's mother that would get Rarity following in lockstep behind them again. Right next to the frolicking Marble Pie, Cloudy Quartz adjusting the golden glasses she wore - the only golden things they brought that I made them, a voice within Maud’s skull reminded her -. “Maud, again; you didn’t have to treat us to all this. Nice as this visit is, being by your ill father’s side would be more heartwarming.”

Maud sighed. Cloudy couldn't have known. She'd just come off saving Rarity from those monstrous Diamond Dogs singlehandedly - this trip, the recent shining Rarity took to her, all this shiny stuff she'd cloaked herself it - it was so she didn't lose them. Like she nearly lost her Rarity. "I just thought we needed more time together, Mom."

“Oh, darling, there'll be plenty of time for that!” A slow cringing smirk spread across Maud’s purplish-pink mouth as she took in the unicorn half-wrapped around her shoulders. Rarity was such a nice and affectionate friend, but sometimes she’d been inconsiderate from her mind tunneling on Maud. Perhaps that was why that little dragon of Twilight's had retired back to Canterlot: well, that and the ursa minor incident. “She’s been dying to see you since the last visit; we spent that day at that dismal estate.”

Rarity was too bust adjusting the shoulder of her own purple frock to notice the twitch in Cloudy's eye at her word choice. Maud did admit, it was a nice and increasingly common design for her; and a near replica to Maud’s own war. Posters around the wall showed countless ponies with that same cut of clothing, all marked with Rarity's signature.

“Be nice, Rarity. We’re here for Pinkie.” Meeting Rarity’s blue eyes, Maud continued. “And that ‘dismal estate’ was my home.”

Red flashed across Rarity’s snout, the fashionista nodding furiously. “O-of course. Apologies, my dear. Sometimes in places like this, the… spectacle gets to me.” Shimmering blue eyes turned behind Maud, widening at the draft still coming from the double doors - and why. “Speaking of, it may have gotten to your other sister too - the poor damsel's barely moved!”

Maud’s fears became manifest as she followed her girlfriend’s gaze to Pinkie Pie. She was standing at the door, a pale shadow among the sea of sparkling eyes and money-weighted barrels, the last - and mutest - member of their entourage.

Her mane was a sleek dark magenta, falling over her face like an endless curtain. Despite the ponies lightly bumping past her through the door, her pose was stiff and rigid, almost like a… Well, Maud didn’t focus too much on that type of sediment anymore. And the light pink dusting her cheeks likely the application of Cloudy Quartz’s caring hoof than her own.

Maud’s heart thrummed rapidly. She knew she’d rolled the dice on bringing her here, but since the rainbowed flash raced over their Farm that changed her life, she’d taken her richer coat as a calling to something more than toiling in caves waiting for friendship to come by. But how much richer in color and character her life became, meeting those five ponies in Ponyville as they searched for their place in this world. Just like Maud had. Just like Pinkie could have.

Which wasn’t going to happen if Pinkie was resigning herself to being more prop than pony.

“Come on, Pinkie. Think the door’s been held open enough, now.” Maud trotted over to PInkie's side, sweeping her up in her hooves. Rarity’s forelimbs were next up, smoothing down the tresses of Pinkie’s mane as Maud pulled her into the casino. Pinkie’s muted pink coat flickered in the Los Pegasus Casino’s ambiance.

As Maud’s forehoof brushed against Pinkie’s only scrap of clothing - a necklace, inlaid with dull jewel-shaped rocks - Maud got her first reaction. Pinkie’s muscles were suddenly taut as she recoiled from the Element of Laughter. But when she saw how Maud still reached out to her, her lips tugged at a smile, Maud giving her a warm one in kind.

But Pinkie’s mouth only opened for her to say, “C-can we just get to the games already? The reader’s probably getting all cross-eyed from all this focus on the sideshow.”

Maud didn’t miss the bitter tilt Pinkie’s voice took on at the word ‘sideshow’. She would have to ask Limestone about Pie’s habit of talking to disembodied witness; no amount of gifts or letters had unmoored her from this fantasizing. Maud worried for her sister in more ways than one, That sort of obliqueness from a Pie to their own family wasn’t healthy.

“Maud! Can you please help me with Marble? She’s getting too close to the slots for my comfort!” called Quartz.

“In a moment, Rarity’s almost done with Pinkie’s hair.” Apparently, the flashing lights and captivating metal slot machines hadn’t loosened Pinkie’s tongue. Much like Maud’s countless other attempted inroads to her despairing sister, it never seemed to connect. But the light bulbs above a certain table near Maud did brighten a bulb above her head.

Inspiration struck, and suddenly, Maud was gently tugging Pinkie toward the craps tables. She only gave Maud a minute of resistance, but Maud gave Rarity a head shake when she started toward them. “Rarity, get Marble instead. I have an idea for something we’ll all enjoy.”


Snake eyes! You’re a winner, Miss Maud! Or should I say, Maudamoiselle!

A croupier pony slid the stack of chips to Maud, adding to the growing mountain of plastic just beyond her hooves. Setting down the cup she used to roll them, Maud stretched back her shoulders, almost obscuring Cloudy's face behind her as she did so. Her frock - a gleaming sapphire silk wrap still wrapped loosely around her neck and barrel, like her previous ones - was the real draw at that table tonight. It drew oohs and ahhs from the crowd gathered around her.

All except the pale pink pony next to her.

Maud paid the pile of chips little mind though. For some reason, despite how much easier it came to her, she wasn’t really into… winning much. ”Where were we, mom?” she asked. “Well, besides at three thousand bits?” she asked the crowing crowd, who let out a whoop of cheers.

That should be enough to continue my talk with Mom, she thought.

Quartz waited for the gathered crowd to settle down before continuing, just behind her table-clearing daughter. “You were talking about your new fall lineup, Maudamoiselle.”

“Yes, that.” Passing the dice-cup to Rarity as she fluttered eyelashes at her - and blushing at the nickname her mother was catching on to - Maud chortled. Her voice trickled with excitement, even past the stone wall her monotone collapsed around it. “Since I moved in with Rarity a month ago, she’s been quite supportive of me. My dresses, my dreams, even Boulder.”

A hearty gasp into a white hoof accompanied Maud’s statement.

Quartz’s eyebrows rose. “You don’t mean…”

“She thinks I can set up a rock and regalia store in Canterlot within the year, mom. I might not need to go for that rocktorate after all. “ Turning back toward Rarity. “And we had our first dinner in the Ponyville caves yesterday. It was quite down-to-earth.”

Another ripple of laughs went through the crowd behind her. “Literally. It was under the rocks. She said it wasn’t her first choice, but smiled through it all the same.” The joyous Rarity flicked a hoof at her bashfully as the crowd awww'ed

Even now, though, Maud's mind was a mess; she wasn’t entirely sure how or what those around her laughed at. It's keeping those around me together, if that was good enough for Dad, that should be enough for me. Celestia forbid, Maud hadn’t much cared for other ponies until that… Sonic Rainboom, did that haughty pegasus call it?… changed her life.

Maud’s gaze traveled down further, just catching the glint of the necklace she sported around her neck, just over her sapphire smock. Gold waves crisscrossed around her neck into a crude diamond, purple as her eyeliner and twice as vibrant. Twilight called it an Element. Maud called it the symbol of her new lease on life.

“Well… I’m quite happy for you. So is everyone at our farm.” Maud could hear Quartz’s voice tremble, but didn’t force it. If her mother wanted to tell her of any developments at home, she would. None of the family had anything to worry about from her. After all, she was still the Maud Pie the Pie family looked up to.

After, she'd told herself so every day for the last month.

The dice being passed around the table soon found its way into Pinkie’s hoof. After taking a lonely look at it, she almost dumped it onto the craps table’s center. The jostling of silver dice resounded heavily as the die turned to a 9. “Ooh, not exactly lucky, my lady.” said the dealer, Pinkie only stared blankly at the dealer, sliding her lost bits toward them.

“Don’t worry, Pinkie,” Maud said. “I’ll make up for that. Enough to get more rocks around your neck, too.”

Pinkie finally gave her a slight smile, touching her necklace. “R-really…. Maud? Like we did before?”

Pinkie Pie smiled wide at last, and Maud’s heart swelled. Details weren’t important now; Maud had her breakthrough! Her body shook with the warm buzz, better than any ore vein she ever picked at in Ponyville’s caves. “Like we did before, Pinkie.”

“I don’t get it…” Maud’s ears perked up at Rarity’s complaint. The fashionista now slumped at the table’s wooden lip and several chips shorter. “I don’t know exactly how three 9's came up like this on the dice. Four in a row, even!”

Maud’s eyes traveled to the die, trying to burn holes through it for inflicting its bad luck upon Pinkie. But it said nothing back, much like Pinkie… or Boulder, still at the Boutique under Sweetie Belle’s care. In fact, the glinting shadows of those red dice even reminded her fondly of Boulder...

Maud’s eyes widened, then slowly settled into a disbelieving glare. A grey hoof slowly slid back on the table, only for Maud’s hoof to smack it away. Marble pouted at her sister's back, but didn’t try to snatch the dice again. After all, it was Maud's turn now.

“Take Pinkie to the back, mom; we’ll talk later.” Seeing the steel in her daughter’s glare, Quartz slowly nodded, taking Pinkle away from the table as the dealer closed her out. Very few things evoked that glare from Maud Pie. Trixie had, once upon a time, after nearly endangering Equestria with an invading ursa major she’d falsely claimed she’d conquered.

Even now, Maud couldn't stand a cheat; Twilight’s release from the hospital only two days ago at the top of the list of reasons why. And the proof of another cheat was now right before her eyes.

“Rarity, please take our winnings to the car after this. It’s been a good night, but I’m loaded with enough bits for today.” A curt nod came from Rarity, waiting for her girlfriend’s final roll. Maud took the dice in her bare hoof this time, curled tightly in the frog of her limb as she rolled it to confirm her suspicions.

Her lips narrowed into a tight line.

“Of course, I’m not the only one loaded here. The pony across from me loaded these dice.” A flick of her hoof and those dice bound into the craps board, once again landing on a 9. Laughter turned to gasps of shock at that move from the formerly lucky mare. “Check them if you don’t believe me.”

Maud blankly watched a pair of eyes across her from the table widen, before two burly bouncers popped up on either side of that stallion. “For next time, mister? Try looking at the player’s cutie marks before thinking you can get rocks past them,” she added.


In the main lobby, the pony attending it was already gone - left to handle that cheater at the MGM Casino several minutes prior. This left the room alone to the Pie family, the late night keeping most of the players here at their tables and machines. Soft ca-chins and thuds of dice ships and slot machines rang around them, though.

The arriving Maud Pie quickly eased Marble Pie’s hoof to their mother’s. She rolled her shoulders to straighten the strap of another sack on her side, thanks to the new saddlebags she’d spent time on. “Wait for us both, please. I have something to give Pinkie.”

That very pony gaped as Maud unloaded one of her packages, holding it out to her. “Is that the… gift you had for me?” Pinkie warily asked.

“It is. Open it, PInkie.”

Pinkie’s eyes glitter as she forces open the wrappings - then dimmed somewhat when she pulled out her gift. A sparkling pair of crystal dice rolled out, attached to a thin silver band. “Since you got tricked by a fake die, I asked the owner for a new die. I... thought this might cap off the good night we had. Gladmane was happy to fork this over; didn’t want anypony else to think he was taking them for granite.”

Not hearing a response from the pale pony before her, Maud continued. “It was a joke. Regardless I apologize for not being there.”

“W-wait, Maud… this was the thing you wanted around my neck?” Pinkie’s voice was neutral.

“I can’t think of anypony else who would.” Still no immediate response. Maud’s heart clenched in its cage. “I was serious, PInkie. Mom and Marble have worn none of the jewelry that I sent them and Limestone keeps throwing her in t-”

“This isn’t what I thought you meant.” Pinkie listlessly dropped the box. “Maud, can’t you see what being an Element's done to you?”

“Y-yes, Pinkie. It got me a girlfriend, it got me friends, courage, everything I could have hoped for, and more…” Seeing the first heavy tear fall down her sister's cheek, Maud’s speech stopped. There was still one thing it hadn't gotten her yet.

“You had that, Maud!” shouted PInkie. Her voice was turning squeaky, afraid, accusatory, as it had increasingly been every visit Made had made. “From your rocktorate and your poetry! The poems you made necklaces like mine with! But you threw that all away when you walked away from that education. When you walked away from this.” And her hooves shot a piece of paper to Maud’s face.

Taking it in her hooves, Maud read it over. It was one of her old poems, and the words still echoed in her mind.

“Rocks, these are my rocks.
Sediments make me sedimental.
Smooth and round,
Asleep in the ground.
Shades of brown
And gray.”

“That’s the real Maud; rock necklaces, not dice ones! But you don’t do that anymore! Now it’s about gifts and trips an-and glitter… not bonding!” Pinkie thrust the dice necklace back into Maud’s trembling hooves. “And I can't take something made to cover for a broken promise. Something isn’t right here, Maud, and it started when you left after your coat changed color.”

Tucking the note away, Maud tried to reach Pinkie again. Her mind surged for an answer that’d put her sister at ease. But it was proving a fruitless dig. “Pinkie, neither of us knew just how that rainbow in the sky gave me my coat. It was only by luck it didn’t do something worse to me... or to you. That's why I protected you from it, sis.”

“I would have lived with it Maud, so long as I was close to you. And even when your… everything changed, I didn’t let that stop me from trying to get the new you! But you’re spending all your time trying to get to me with all these silly trinkets and trips, that… I mean, look at your new friends!”

“They just laugh at my jokes, Pinkie.”

“They’d laugh at anything you gave them! This isn’t reaching out, it’s taking advantage! Y-you're dependant on being an Element, not defining it, Sis!” Pinkie’s voice was barely below a shout now. “And all you’ve sent us since you went to Ponyville are gifts, like we’re... Hearth’s Warming trees to decorate!”

“I’ll be able to send the money after the Boutique opens.”

“I’m talking about the pony that owns it, Sis! She used to be the most original designer in Ponyville; now she’s basically thrown away her talent just to please you!”

Maud slowly flashed back to all the dresses in Rarity's posters, and the one on the white unicorn herself. “I can’t help what Rarity does for me.” she lied.

“Of course not, Maud! You can’t help anypony, just dress them up and batter them up and send them out the door, like cupcakes! But ponies aren’t cupcakes, and if you can’t see that...“ Pinkie’s voice trembled, betraying her inner turmoil. “You won't be able to help me, or Rarity. Or yourself.”

Pinkie’s words sank into Maud’s chest like a pickaxe. Even with the power of the Elements of Harmony before her, Maud did still feel disjointed. Even beyond her cool and collected demeanor, Maud was reaching toward her sister and failing. And her one opportunity to pull her from that cliff was dissolving before her forehooves. “Pinkie... I had no idea you felt like this.”

“Why would you? You can’t see how you look. Only the readers can see how empty your clothes are, Maudamoiselle.” Pinkie’s sobs rang the halls of the Las Pegasus Casino, as she pointed in a direction past Maud, toward your eyes. “I shouldn’t have come, I’m sorry, I-” And then she was running back to Quartz and Marble, and away from Maud; the sister she’d once been so close to.

Maud Pie let her go, her limbs trembling as she watched her collapse into Quartz’s shoulder. She was Marble Pie turning her head towards her again, shooting a look of icy regret. The necklace around Marble’s neck - rocks, just like the one around Pinkie’s - bobbed as she turned to the other two grey ponies, then leaving the lobby together without Maud.

Maud felt shame for only noticing them now. Her own necklace - her Element - now felt like a millstone around her neck.

After a while, Maud followed their trail, her steps taking her past the lobby. Stopping at the door's thresh, she soaked in the sight of the night sky, even as Rarity waved to her from the carriage she’d stuffed her winnings into. She wanted to go back with her family, they’d come to this place together! But even from her position, only ten hoofsteps removed from them, she was rooted to the spot.

Desperate blue eyes watched Cloudy Quartz call a pegasus carriage, her eyes looking to Maud’s one last time. Her mouth moved, trying to mouth out thanks to her for the night Maud had treated them to. Then she, Marbie, and PInkie were in the carriage, and it was twirling off in the blank night back to Rockopolis.

Away from the Element of Laughter.

A heavy, empty chuckle came from her mouth. If it didn't, tears would. And Rarity didn’t deserve that, Maud knew. Nopony did.

And yet... said Maud’s inner pony. Here you are on the glittering rocks, watching the last ship leave harbor.

Her hoofsteps took her to Rarity’s side again. “Rarity.” she croaked, voice feeling fifty years older than it was.

“Yes, my dear?” She brought her smock closer to herself.

“Send those bits to the Pie farm, please.” A lump fought its way down her throat. “And… please get that dress off. It’s a bit too plain for you.”