> What Went Wrong?
>  by StormbadgerXIII
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

> Critical Error
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


What Went Wrong?
Chapter 1 - Critical Error






"Dear diary,

Today is going to be a great day!  I've got lots of shopping to do, though, but I've decided to treat myself with muffins.  (Yay muffins!)  Then I'm going to have lunch with Carrot Top at The Haybale.  I'll try not to order muffins; I don't want everypony to think I'm obsessed with them.  But they make really good muffins, so that might be hard...

Dinky's birthday is in a month.  I'm so looking forward to it!  I hope she's invited lots of friends, but Pinkie's running it so I don't have to worry about it too much.

Well, gotta go, Diary.  See you soon!  Bye!"

Derpy sighed happily through the pencil in her mouth, and slid the diary under her bed, next to her 'midnight muffins'.  Smiling, she laid the pencil on the bedside table and folded up the discretely rune-edged glasses she wore, placing them near a framed image of her and her daughter, Dinky.

With a spring in her step and a beat of her wings, she bounced down from her room and through the kitchen, whistling her favourite pre-spring tune, Winter Wrap-Up.  She didn't know why she liked it so much, and considering it was midsummer it seemed a little inappropriate, but she couldn't get that cheery tune out of her head.

Flinging the door open and breathing in the fresh, wholesome air of Ponyville, she took to the air and drifted towards the market.





One shopping trip later, Derpy was happily eating a professionally-baked and incredibly delicious muffin, sitting at a table with her orange Earth pony friend.

"Couldn't resist the muffin?"  Carrot Top asked, sipping her cup of tea.  Her actual name was Golden Harvest, but she much preferred her nickname.

Derpy nodded, smiling happily.  "Yep.  They make the best muffins in town."

Carrot laughed a little.  "Well, yours are just as good, I reckon."

"Aww, thanks."  Derpy softly replied, blushing a little.  She took another bite of her muffin, chewing it cheerfully.  "How's the gardening going?"

"Not too badly.  The pegasi have been really good with the weather."  She said, looking around for other pegasi.  She then remembered the wings on the side of Derpy.  "What about you?  How's your job going?"

"Really well!"  Derpy chirped.  "I've been pretty busy.  Post Haste's come down with a cold, so me and Mr Zippy have to work extra."

"Oh, that's a shame."  Carrot said sympathetically.  "And how's Dinky doing?"

"She's doing great, I think."  Derpy muttered, taking another bite.  "She's been playing a lot with 'the Cutie Mark Crusaders'."

"Those three fillies?"  Carrot asked incredulously.

"Mhm.  I'm glad she's making friends."

Carrot took another sip of her drink, then saw a lavender-coated unicorn mare trot briskly towards them.  She hurriedly finished her drink.  "Well, Derpy, I've got to go and work on my garden.  I'll see you later, alright?"

"Aww, ok."  Derpy said, then hugged her friend.  "See you."

"Excuse me, Miss Hooves, is it?"  the unicorn mare asked as Derpy released her grip, Carrot trotting off.

"Hi!"  She replied with her usual bubbly enthusiasm.  "Just call me Derpy."

"Ok...'  the unicorn said, somewhat startled at the cheerful reaction.  "are you free today?"

"Uh, yeah, guess I am."  Derpy muttered.  "Oh!  Wait!"  She took the muffin in her mouth and finished it off.  "There, now I'm free."





Twilight levitated a piece of parchment in front of Derpy's eyes.  "I need you to read this first."

"I left my glasses at home."  Derpy said.

Twilight blinked.  "Oh.  Well, you can go get them if you want."

"Don't worry, I can read it... just might be a bit hard at points."

"How come?"

"My eyes go a bit... funny some times."  Derpy said, quietly.

"Oh."  Twilight muttered.  "Sorry, I didn't know."

"It's alright!"  Derpy quickly replied.  "I'll try my best."

Focusing her eyes on the parchment, she began reading.  She felt her eyes move on their own, blurring the words.  She shook her head and closed her eyes, refocusing.  After much time, she had finally read the document; it was basically a form saying she had agreed to do some sort of experiment on teleporting, and some legal stuff regarding accidents.  "I can't teleport."

Twilight pulled the sheet away.  "That's because it's an experiment on me teleporting you.  Do you want to go through with this?"

"Sure!"

"Then I need you to sign your name on this."

Derpy took the pen in her mouth and scribbled her signature on it.  "'ehr.  Uhn."  She laid the pen on the desk, an action she had well rehearsed.

Twilight started setting up some sciency-looking things; what they did was beyond Derpy's comprehension.  "I have full permission from the princess and I've done a significant amount of research on this, but even so there haven’t been records of a teleother spell since Starswirl the Bearded's time."

"Oh, ok."  Derpy said, trying to hide her ignorance.  Being a pegasus, she didn't know much about obscure unicorn history.  Heck, not even many unicorns knew that stuff either.

Twilight then started explaining how the thing worked, something about channels and brains and nets.  Derpy zoned out, thinking about her daughter.  Her eyes rolled around a little.

Twilight had just finished explaining how the spell worked when she saw Derpy's... expression.  "Eheheh... you're not getting it, are you?"

"What?"  Derpy asked, her eyes snapping back into focus.  "I'm not really that smart."

"Ok, short version:  this device-"  the unicorn said, waving a hoof to her set up "-allows me to teleport you as if I was teleporting myself.  However we both need to focus on it for it to work."

"Does teleportaling hurt?"  Derpy asked, her brow furrowing in concern.

"Not really.  You might get a bit singed, though."

"Like being hit by lightning, right?"

"How-"

"Ask Dash about it."  Derpy muttered.  "I don't recommend it."

"O...k...?"  Twilight turned to the device.  "I'll need you to stand in the centre there."

Derpy saluted and flew into the centre of the science stuff.  It looked kind of scary, but she never let her fear get the best of her.  "What happens now?"

"Now?"  Twilight said, slipping on a labcoat and safety glasses.  "Let's go practice magic."  She flipped some switches and twisted some dials, and the machines started humming.  "Now, Derpy, I need your full concentration.  I'm going to try teleporting you to the balcony, so just relax and focus."

"Ok."  Derpy said succinctly, and tried to focus.  But with the humming of the machines and the encroaching fear of what might happen, it was not an easy task.

Twilight's horn started glowing more intensely, and she started funnelling energy into the devices.  The humming increased.  "Focus, Derpy..."

Derpy gulped, standing in faux confidence.  She felt some weird feeling crawling into her coat and mane, and her eyes went odd again.

Twilight clenched her jaw and eyes shut, completely focused on the task.  Unlike the grey pegasus, who was anything but totally concentrating on her task.

"Almost... almost... three... two... o-"

In a flash of light, the pegasus was no more.





The first thing she felt about teleporting - weightlessness.  It was like she had jumped into water, but it had the viscosity of air.

The second thing she felt - a lurch as something pulled her out of the weightlessness.

The third - a weird tingly feeling in her body.

The fourth - the floor, which she hit rather painfully.

Her vision was a complete blur, her eyes spinning.  She felt like throwing up, but held her lunch in.  She stood up, stumbling around, before losing her balance and landing on a bed.

Wait... a bed?

She closed her eyes and shook her head, and instantly her vision refocused.  She wasn't on any sort of balcony, but in a room.  Her room.  And by the looks of it, it hadn't been cleaned in some time.

"Weird..." she muttered out loud.  She had cleaned the room two days ago.  Darn dust bunnies getting into her room.  She centred her balance and looked around some more.  Everything was more or less the same, but with some minor changes.  The framed image of her and Dinky was missing, for one, but her glasses remained.  She took those and slipped them on, the magic keeping her eyes focused, except for the layer of dust on them.  She wiped that off and replaced them on her nose.

She looked under her bed, and saw her diary was missing and her 'midnight muffins' looked more like broccoli now.  Ew.

She looked everywhere for her diary, until she noticed it was right on the bed.  She flipped it open; it was more or less the same as she left it.  Good, now she could go back to Twilight and explain the problem.

There was a note on the door.  She pushed her glasses up and read.


Mum.

I'm going to Canterlot.  If you ever get this message, 'if' being the key word, then don't come looking for me.

~Dinky.


That couldn't be Dinky.  The writing was too good, the language not like something she'd write, and it didn't have the sort of cheer she had.

"Silly Derpy, Dinky wouldn't… not want me to find her!"  She said.  "Outta my way, door, I've got to talk to Twilight."  She pushed the door open...

...And was greeted with the sight of a barren, burnt and broken Ponyville where the stairwell was supposed to be.

Derpy blinked in complete shock.

"Hang on... where are the stairs?"
> New World
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


What Went Wrong?
Chapter 2 - New World






It took a near monumental force for Derpy to not fall out of the room, but she managed it.  Her house wasn't supposed to be half-destroyed.

Ponyville wasn't supposed to be a bunch of blackened ruins either.  Yet they were.

"What...?"

How could Ponyville change so rapidly in such a short period of time?  How could her house be half demolished without anyone asking her first?  And why were her muffins broccoli?

"What happened?"

As far as she could see, which was quite the distance, everything looked blasted and burnt.  There was no grass, no flowers, and the trees stood as blackened reminders of their former majesty.  A cloud of dust rolled through the town, picking up loose pieces of building and foliage.  Derpy shielded her eyes from it, feeling the dust stick to her coat.

"I can't quite put my hoof on it, but something seems..."

Something creaked.  Derpy looked around in concern.  Nothing seemed to have happened.  "Ah well, guess it's my imagi-"

The floor jolted violently forward, nearly throwing Derpy out of the room.  The creaking grew louder.  The floor shifted again, the old wood snapping.  Seeing no other option she leapt out, flapping her wings like a madpony.  She screeched to a halt, and turned around just in time to see what little remained of her house collapse on itself, disappearing in a cloud of dust.  Derpy coughed, clearing her throat of things ponies really shouldn't breathe.

"Oh no!  My house!"  She landed in front of the ruins, a look of disbelief on her face.  "No no no no no!  It's broken!  Why is it broken?!"

The cloud settled, and it occurred to her it had been pretty much destroyed beforehoof.  Only her room had remained standing, and even then.  Her weight must have tipped the balance of it, causing it to collapse.  Then she blinked.  "Wow, that was pretty smart of me."

She trotted up to the house and looked where the front step had been.  The welcome mat had disappeared.  Cautiously, as not to have what little stood of the house collapse on her, she crawled in, looking around.  Everything was a wreck, with all the rooms destroyed and many of the things in them missing.  Dinky's room was completely empty.  The kitchen was devoid of any appliances or muffins.  She managed to find her diary and her saddlebags amongst the remains of her room.  She also pulled out a green scarf and sweater from a broken chest of drawers, just in case things got chilly... which they might.  The clothing was musty, but in good condition, considering rest of the house.

She decided to look around to see if any buildings were still intact.  Surely one would be, right?





Apparently not.

Sugarcube Corner was gone.  Mr Breezy's Fan Emporium was gone.  The quills and sofas store was gone.  Carrot Top's place was gone.  Heck, as she kept looking around, everything was gone.  In fact, the only thing she saw that didn't look gone was Canterlot, way in the distance.

Derpy found a park bench and sat on it, at first like her friend Lyra usually did, but then like a normal pony.  She sighed, looking around.  "Everything seems to be broken.  I wonder what happened..."

She heard a whooshing sound in the air, followed by two more.  Pegasi.  She saw three of them flying above her; a mare and two stallions.

"Hey, ponies!  Hey!  HEY!  I'm over here!  Hey!"  She waved her hooves at them, but they just kept flying off.  "Aww..."

She found her way into the ruins of Sugarcube Corner and looked around.  Nothing of value, but she had expected that.  "That was rude of them, flying over me and ignoring me like that.  I wish they would come over here and tell me what's going on."

No sooner had she finished speaking when three pony-sized blurs rushed at her.  One of them jumped on her, pinning her to the ground with all four hooves trapping hers.  A cold steel blade rested on her neck, and she screamed in terror.  The pony covered her mouth with a hoof, and talking through the handle on the blade, growled something that sounded like "who are you?"

"Aaaagh!  Don't hurt me!  I didn't do anything!"  Derpy cried, squirming.

"'Ehrfy?!"  The mare on top of her shouted, spitting out the blade.  "What the hay?"

"Huh...?"  Derpy said, looking up at... "Rainbow Dash?"

"Derpy?"  Asked an ebony coated stallion, looking like he had seen a ghost.

"Thunderlane?"

"Who's this?"  The third pony, another stallion queried, more confused than anything. 

"You disappear for Luna-knows how long, and show up now?"

Derpy just blinked.  "I what?"

Dash growled and got off Derpy, letting the pegasus stand.  "Darn it, Derpy!  What the hay happened to you?"

"I let Twilight do some magic sciencey stuff and then I appeared here."  She cocked her head in curiosity.  "You look older."

Dash turned around, and did in fact look older.  She looked more muscular than before, but her eyes were heavy and black-rimmed from lack of sleep.  There were some emerging wrinkles around her mouth.  "Derpy... it's been fifteen years."

Derpy's mouth dropped.  "Fif..."

Thunderlane found an old seat and sat down carefully.  "Yeah, fifteen years.  Fifteen years since you were last seen."

"And oh boy, what you've missed."  The other pegasus said, smirking.  His coat was a pale blue and his mane a very dark blue.  "War, death, the destruction of Cloudsdale..."

Dash rounded on him, her magenta eyes locking onto his green ones.  "I told you never to mention Cloudsdale again, Soarin'."

"Oh yeah, right..."  Soarin' muttered, looking down to the floor.  "Sorry chief."

"Wait, Soarin'?"  Derpy asked, looking even more confused.  She turned her head to Dash.  "Chief?"

Dash flew up into the air and posed, showing her awesomeness off.  "Yep!  Air Chief Marshall Rainbow Dash!"

"Wow, cool!"  Derpy gave her rainbow-maned friend a little applause.  Dash floated down, thanking a virtually invisible crowd.  When Derpy finished, Soarin' burst out laughing.  Thunderlane simply looked around.

Dash turned to Soarin' again, annoyed.  "What's so funny?"

Soarin' wiped a tear from his eye, chuckling.  "S-sorry, chief, just that was a little over the top."

Dash rolled her eyes, smiling.  "Ha ha, Soarin'."

Thunderlane pulled his head back from beyond the door.  "I think we'd better return to the Fort."

Dash coughed, clearing her throat.  "Good idea, Thunderlane.  Derpy, we need you to come with us."

Derpy tilted her head, frowning.  "Why?"

"Ponyville isn't safe."  She turned away, looking out a broken window.  "Not anymore."





"W-w-w-we're going into there?"  Derpy squeaked in terror.

Soarin' floated in front of her.  "What, the Everfree?  Of course."

"B-b-but w-wh-w-why?"

"It's where the Fort is."  Dash added.

"B-b-but isn't the Everfree Forest full of creatures with nasty sharp pointy teeth?"

"Nope, not any more.  Well, ok, the manticores refused to leave, but they stay well away from the path."

Derpy nodded, still trembling.  Her eyes drifted to the bow-like thing attached to a box on Soarin''s side.  "Hey, what's that?"

"Huh?  Oh, this?"  Soarin' grinned.  "Dual-torque crossbow with switchable inferno and paralysis enchantments."

Derpy leaned towards the crossbow, and poked it.  With a loud THUNK the bolt loaded on it shot out, slamming into a tree.  Soarin' panicked, but quickly regained himself.

"Fortunately that was paralysis."  He turned to Derpy, frowning.  "Don't touch it again, ok?"

"Okie dokie."  Derpy muttered, just about as scared of that thing as anypony who was near the business end.

Thunderlane stepped forward, taking a ground route.  "Come on guys, we don't have all day."

Dash straightened up.  "Right, Thunderlane has a point.  Let's report back to the Princess."

Derpy opened her mouth to ask about that statement, but the pegasi took off before she could even get a word out.  Flapping her wings rapidly, she eventually caught up with them, struggling to keep up to their pace.

The grey pegasus had to admit, she was always too scared to enter the Everfree Forest.  It was dark and creepy and didn't work like the rest of Equestria.  She felt like the trees around her were trying to eat her.  She knew that idea was silly; trees don't eat ponies.  Even so, she couldn't shake the feeling.

If Dash, Soarin' and Thuderlane were feeling the same, then they were hiding it well.  Dash kept her eyes forward, but the two stallions at her side turned their heads around, looking for trouble.  The pegasi passed over a broken cliff pass, and landed down at a little dirt path.  Dash turned around to the group.  "Sorry guys," she muttered.  "I've gotta stop here for a minute."  And without a word more she walked off into the bushes.

Soarin' sighed.  "She always stops here.  I tried asking before, but... well... she hit me for it."  He reached up to his cheek and rubbed a sore patch that no longer existed.

Derpy blinked, turning to Soarin'.  She pushed her glasses up a little.  "Hang on, you're Soarin'.  Of the Wonderbolts."

"Yep."  Soarin' stood proudly.  He was pretty large for a pegasus, but years of athletic activity would do that.  He wore a teal scarf around his neck, his flight goggles sitting on his eyes.  "While the Wonderbolts technically don't exist anymore, I'll be damned if I ever give up my title."

Thunderlane scoffed.  "I'm surprised Luna didn't make you the ACM."

"She knows Dash more than me, and she's got what it takes.  Me?"  Soarin' smiled.  "I'm just Soarin'."

Derpy frowned.  "But, as a Wonderbolt, you'd technically be better to lead..."

"Me, lead?"  Soarin' chuckled, turning to face her.  "I barely made the team.  If any of us, 'Fire should be the ACM."

"True."  Thunderlane agreed.  "She was your captain."

"What ranks are you?"  Derpy asked, a curious look on her face.

"Wing Commander."  Soarin' said proudly.

"Flight Sergeant."  Thuderlane matter-of-factly said.

"Wow, cool."  Derpy smiled at them.  Thuderlane blushed a little.

Soarin' grinned.  "Yep.  Pretty cool being high up.  Not as much time with the ponies as I'd like," he turned to Thuderlane.  "But I manage."

Thunderlane was about to say something when his pupils became pinpricks and his ear twitched.  "Sh!"

Derpy blinked, looking around.  "What is it?  I don't see-"

"Shh!"  Thunderlane hissed, putting a hoof up to his mouth.  He scanned his eyes as his head panned around.  "Trouble."

Trouble launched out of the bushes in the form of a chicken.  Well, sort of a chicken.  It had the head of a chicken but the body of a winged serpentine creature, and it slithered in the air as its leather wings flapped.  Thunderlane shouted "Cockatrice!"

Derpy had read about cockatrices before.  Something about that it was very very bad when you looked at its eyes.  She shut her eyes tight and screamed.  The scream wasn't intentional, but nonetheless it did happen.

Thunk!  Thunk!  Thuthunk!

The cockatrice gave a pathetic squawk, and hit the ground.  Derpy opened her eyes and saw that it was lying limply with a number of wooden bolts sticking out of its body.  Green patches matted its white plumage.  Soarin' laughed.

"So much for the myths."  Thunderlane muttered, trotting over to the limp and (hopefully) dead creature.  He tapped it with a hoof.  "Dead."

"Good."  Soarin' walked up too.  "Good thing we weren't looking at its eyes."

"I tried shooting at its eyes.  Seems I was off by... well... a bit."

"A bit?  You got it right between the eyes!"

"Well, yeah, but-"

"And another in the heart!  I think.  Where's the heart on these things?"

"I don't know.  I just know they're creatures."

Soarin' turned around, keeping his head locked on to Thunderlane as well as he could.  "I swear, Thunder, you were aiming for-"

He saw Derpy just standing there with a horrified expression.  "Oh... darn."

"What?"  Thunderlane asked, turning around before seeing the grey pegasus for himself.

Derpy looked at them.  "I-i-is it dead?"

Soarin' sighed, looking at the serpentine creature.  "Yeah.  Sorry you had to see that.  But after you kill seven of them, you get over it."

Derpy trotted up to the creature, still staring.  Thunderlane walked up to her.

"Derpy.  Come on."

"Y-you killed it..."

"Only because it was going to kill us.  Besides, it was just dumb luck we got it in the vitals."  Soarin' added.  "Besides, at least none of us are stoned..."

Derpy turned around, closed her eyes and reopened them.  "Yeah, I guess..."

Thunderlane, once again, was about to say something when Dash returned.  "You good, Chief?"

"Yeah, I am.  Come on."  She took to the air and flew ahead, slower this time.  The other three joined her, and Derpy couldn't shake the feeling that Dash was hiding something.





Dash pushed aside more branches, making sure they didn't snap back to hit the others.  Derpy thanked her.

"Ok, we should be close to the HQ now."  Dash murmured.  "Soarin', check our position."

Soarin' nodded and flew up, breaking through the foliage.  He returned a second later, dark green leaves falling down on them.  "Straight ahead, Chief."

"Thanks."  Dash kept her pace up, and after a few more metres she poked her head out of the treeline.  "Alright, guys, we're here."

"Wait, why did we go through all this forest when there was a perfectly good path to use?"  Derpy asked.

"All the ballistae would be pointed there.  And anyway, it allows us to check the path for tracks."  Thunderlane added.

"Oh."

Dash trotted out first, loudly informing whoever was beyond the foliage that they weren't enemies.  Soarin' followed her, Thunderlane shortly after.  Derpy took a step out and her jaw dropped.

In front of her was an old, broken palace complex, patched up with new-looking stones and plates of metal.  Most of it was obscured by a huge metal wall, painted olive green with the occasional white 'PLR' sprayed on it.  At least ten pegasi floated around above and between the walls, and other, non-winged ponies, dressed in various types of armour, trotted on the tops of the walls.  Giant crossbows were sparsely mounted across the walls, each one tended to by two ponies.  Dash turned towards Derpy and smiled.

"Welcome to the Fort."
> The Fort
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


What Went Wrong?
Chapter 3 - The Fort


"Big" was all Derpy managed to say.

"Yep, it's big."  Soarin' replied, smiling.  "This is the Fort, the headquarters for all the PLR's operations."

"PLR?"

"Ponies' Lunar Republic.  Most of us call it the Ponies' Republic or just the Republic."  He started walking forward with Thunderlane and Rainbow.  "Luna doesn't really like the 'Lunar' part."

"Wait, Luna?  As in Princess Luna?"  Derpy asked, cantering towards them.  "Princess Luna is here?"

"Duh, that's why it's the Ponies' Lunar Republic."  Dash smirked.  "Hey, Rose, we're here!"

A beige-yellow mare peered over the walls.  "Oh, hey Dash.  Took the scenic route again?"

"Cockatrice ambush."  She half-lied.  "Now let us in already."

"Fine, fine.  Snowflake, get the door."

After a few seconds, one of the plates on the door slid to the side with a subtle but painful-sounding grinding noise.  Pushing the door was a huge, over muscled white pegasus with tiny wings.  The door stopped only part-way, enough for two ponies to walk through if they were close enough.  He gestured them in.

"Thanks Snowflake."  Dash said, patting the hulk on the side.

"Welcome."  Snowflake replied, looking over the group.  His eyes locked on to Derpy's and hers onto his.  He raised an eyebrow.  "Uh, Dash?"

"I'll explain later."

The group of pegasi passed through another gate, once again opened by Snowflake, and the castle came into view.  It was blackened from time, but some new, grey stones had been placed where old ones had fallen out.  The occasional metal plate rested on the structure.  Several balconies stuck out, some with giant crossbows mounted on them, others were bare.  The castle itself was set on an island of land, a dark chasm separating it from the rest of the land.  A giant stone/metal bridge had been laid out across it, with one rotten-wood post sticking out from away from it.  Dash faltered in her step, looking at the post.

"Something wrong, Chief?"  Soarin' asked, trotting up to her.

"Just..."  Dash said, her words catching in her throat.  She sighed.  "Nothing, never mind.  Come on, Luna's waiting for us."

"Alright."  Soarin' said quietly.

They walked across the bridge, Dash keeping front, Soarin' next to her, Derpy and Thunderlane in tow.  Derpy looked around at all the sights, her jaw hanging low.  Thunderlane pushed it up.  "Just so you don't breathe in something nasty."

Derpy blushed.  "Th-thanks..."

They reached the end of the bridge and trotted up to the main door of the castle.  A pair of unicorns pulled the doors apart, allowing them inside.  One of them glared at Derpy, and she smiled weakly back.

The inside of the castle was not like a castle at all.  They were instead walking down a long arched corridor, a small section opened up with a statue of Princess Luna in the centre.  Ponies walked, trotted, galloped and cantered around, each doing their own duties.  Dash lead the group forward, ponies saluting at them.  Eyes fell to the young grey pegasus; some with annoyance, some with confusion, and maybe one or two with some amount of attraction.  Derpy didn't look back, feeling as awkward as a pony could.  She recognised a few faces, but they all seemed like distant shadows of what she knew.

Dash stopped in front of a large room, the door clearly marking some sort of throne room.  "Well, we're here."  She pushed the door open.

Derpy looked in, and saw that the throne room once again defeated her expectations.  It was a fragmented dome, the walls painted in a mockery of the night sky.  There was no giant chair, but a big wooden table with some fancy-looking devices over it.  A small section was curtained off.  And in the centre of the room, leaning over some maps on the table, was a massive midnight-blue alicorn with a flowing, night-sky mane.  She looked up and smiled.

"Rainbow Dash, you have returned."

"Sorry, ma'am, had a couple of delays on the way."  Dash stepped forward, bowing.

"It matters not; anything of note from the recon?"

"There's full wartrain coming from Canterlot.  I think they might try something in a few days."

Luna sighed, shutting her eyes.  "My sister grows desperate."

"Don't worry ma'am,"  Soarin' said.  "The PLR'll weather it."

"PR, please..."  Luna muttered under her breath.  She looked up.  "I don't think it should be dedicated to me, even if I do lead it."  She looked at the rest of the group, then her eyes stopped on Derpy.

"Uhhh... hi." Derpy meekly said, waving a hoof.

"You... I've seen you before."  The alicorn murmured.  "You are the one they called 'Derpy', correct?"

Derpy nodded.

"The one who disappeared fifteen years ago?"

Again, she nodded.

Luna just looked at her, mixed emotions playing with her face.  "I... Dash.  We need to organise the defences."

Dash saluted and walked forward.  "You guys... show Derpy around.  Or something."

"Understood."  Thunderlane said.  "Derpy, come with me."

Derpy nodded and followed Thunderlane.  "Now, Derpy, you're going to have to bunk in with the younger recruits.  We already have all the VIP rooms occupied."  He turned to face her.  "Just... try not to reference the past.  Even if they do."  He sighed, and continued to lead her.

Eventually they reached the large room, which Derpy had seen many ponies enter and exit.  Thunderlane found an unoccupied bed for her, and then left without a word.  Derpy just watched him.

"Hey."

The grey pegasus turned, only to stare into a set of purple eyes.  She squeaked.

"Hey, newblood."

Derpy saw the orange coat and purple mane attached to the eyes.  "H-hi."

"Gotta name?"  the mare asked, looking bored.

"I'm..."  She needed to think of a name, and fast.  She couldn't use her old name... she had to think of something. "...I'm... Ditzy.  Ditzy Doo."

"Scootaloo."  the orange mare said, looking her over.

"Oh, I know yo-" Derpy started saying, but covered her mouth with a hoof.

Scootaloo raised an eyebrow.  "What was that?

"I've... heard of you before..."  Derpy said, giving her best winning smile.

Not winning enough for Scootaloo.  "No, you said something else."

"No I didn't."

"Yes you did."

"No I didn't."

"Yes you did."

"No I didn't."

"No you didn't."

"Yes I did!"  Derpy said, then realised what she said, and facehoofed.  "Aww, darn it."

Scootaloo chuckled triumphantly.  "So, what were you about to say?"

"Um..."

The orange pegasus grabbed and lifted Derpy by the scarf.  "What were you about to say."  She wasn't asking any more.

Derpy struggled and squirmed, but to no avail.  "I..."

"I what?"  Scootaloo growled.  A small crowd was gathering around.

"Scoots!"  A voice called out from amongst the throng of ponies.  They moved aside to reveal a light yellow mare with a red mane.  Next to her was a light grey and dark grey stallion.  "Ah told ya not t'mess up the newbloods!"

Scootaloo dropped Derpy on the ground.  "Fine.  You're the sarge."  She stormed off, muttering oaths under her breath.

The earth pony mare pulled Derpy up from the ground.  "Sorry, she's a might unpleasant.  Not like last time."

"It's ok."  Derpy said.

"Ah'm Apple-Bloom.  Sergeant Major, but Ah don't really like it when ponies use mah rank t'talk to me."

"I'm Ditzy Doo."  Derpy lied, holding out a hoof.  Apple-Bloom shook it.  "Nice to meet you."

The grey pegasus smiled.  "I'm Rumble.  Just Rumble."

"You're Thunderlane's brother!"  Derpy said, grinning.  Then she remembered Thunderlane's warning.  "I mean... you look a lot like him..."

"Uh... yeah.  I'm his brother."  Rumble looked around, then whispered to Apple-Bloom.  The sergeant major nodded.  "Ditzy, we need to have a bit of a talk."





"You ain't Ditzy Doo, ain't you?"

Derpy shifted uncomfortably where she stood.  "Y-yes I am."

"No you're not."  Rumble said, matter of factly.  "You knew I was Thunderlane's brother."

"I said you looked a lot like him..."  she moaned.  "I just... jump to conclusions."

"Likely story."  Apple-Bloom deadpanned.

"But-"

"Ah think I remember y'all from before..."  she murmured.  "Couldja take of them glasses?"

"But, I need them to-"

"If you needed them you wouldn't be in the army."  Rumble added.

"I'm not in the army!"  Derpy shouted.

"Y'all ain't?"  Apple-Bloom asked, turning her head to the side slightly.

"N-no.  All the VIP rooms are taken."  Derpy muttered.

"So, y'all are a VIP?"

"I... I think so..."

Apple-Bloom sighed.  "Alright.  Even so, could y'all take of them glasses?  Please?"

Derpy reluctantly obliged.  She felt the subtle magic keeping her eyes completely focused dissipate as the glasses were removed.

"Eeyup, Ah knew it."  Apple-Bloom looked over Derpy.  "Y'all Dinky's mom, ain'tcha?"

"I... um..."  Derpy sighed, lowering her head.  "Yes."

"I knew it!"  Rumble shouted.  "You're that mare my brother kept talking about!"

Derpy blinked in shock.  "Th... Thunderlane kept talking about me?"

"Well, yeah.  I think he was in love with you or something."  He put a hoof to his chin.  "That, or it was Flitter he loved, but he did talk about you.  A lot."

"Wow..."  She muttered, blushing a little.

"So... what happened?"  Apple-Bloom asked.  "When y'all disappeared?"

"I dunno.  I was just standing there when I was teleportaled to my room, just..."  Derpy hesitated.  "I think Twilight missed her mark."

"Ah'm sure it was an accident."  Apple-Bloom said, patting Derpy on the back.  "It happens."  She gave a sympathetic smile, but then her wrist beeped.  "Shoot, gotta go.  See y'all later!"

"Uh... ok, see you later!"  Derpy waved a hoof to the trotting Apple-Bloom, then sighed.

"So, Derpy.  Wanna go see my bro?"  Rumble asked, smiling.

Derpy's eyes widened, a slight blush forming.  "I-um..."

"I don't mean it like that, geez."  he laughed.  "But I think you two need to talk."





Derpy rapped her hoof on a door, marked with Thunderlane's cutie mark: a cloud with a lightning bolt.  No response came, so she knocked again.  "Thunderlaaaane...!"

The door creaked open, a set of amber eyes meeting hers.  "Oh, hey Derpy."

"Can I come in?"

"No!"  Thunderlane shouted, blushing.  "I-I mean, I'm a bit busy..."

"Doing what?"

"Nothing!"

"But I need to talk to you-"

"Come back in an hour, 'kay thanks bye!"  SLAM!

Derpy just stared in surprise.  "That... was interesting..."  She started walking around aimlessly; she had about an hour to kill before she could talk to Thunderlane.  What the hay could he be doing?  I hope it's not... boy stuff... or worse, he could be with another mare... She shook her head.  Come on, Derpy, he's fifteen years older than last time.  He can be with another mare if he wants.

Whatever she was planning on thinking next was thrown out of her head when she collided with a solid, warm, pony-sized object.  She fell to her haunches, rubbing her head.  "Oww..."

She looked up and saw a large orange mare glaring down at her, a worn cowpony hat resting on her head.  "Watch where y'all are goin'."

"S-sorry Applejack!"  Derpy squeaked, standing up.

"That's Lieutenant General Applejack to y'all."  Applejack gave Derpy a look over.  She looked a lot more muscular than Derpy remembered, her hair short-cut.  She was clad in a barely-fitting olive uniform, a large duster on top of that.  One of her hooves was completely covered, but Derpy could tell it didn't look entirely... normal.  Unfortunately Applejack caught her looking.  "Don't ask."

"Ask about what?  Your hoof?"  Derpy asked anyway, tilting her head a little.  "Is it really hurt or somethi-"

WHACK!

Derpy felt her hooves leave the ground (without her wanting them too), her body flying off, and then the sudden deceleration of hitting a wall.  Then, and only then, did she feel the pain of the iron-hard hoof that hit her face.  When she finally snapped her mind back into the real world, she put a hoof to her cheek.  "Ow! Ow... Ow... Pain hurts..."

"Ah said don't ask, Derpy."  Applejack growled, her strange hoof returning back to its normal position.  She walked off, everyone she passed giving her plenty of room.

Derpy just sat there, hoof to cheek.  She felt her eyes tearing up.

"I'm guessing you asked her about the hoof?"  A mare next to her said.  A yellowy-orange hoof appeared in front of Derpy, and the grey pegasus took it, hoisting herself up.  She turned to the mare, and her eyes widened; the mare's hair was on fire!  Oh, wait, that was her hair.  She smiled.  

"I guess she doesn't like it when people ask about it."

"She's not proud of it."  The orange fire-maned mare (a pegasus, too) muttered, then turned to face Derpy and smiled.  "I'm Spitfire."

"As in 'Spitfire, captain of the Wonderbolts'?"  Derpy asked, her eyes lighting up.

"Yep."  Spitfire grinned, nodding.  "Well, ex-captain of the ex-Wonderbolts, but still the same mare."

"Wow, cool!"

"Mhm.  Hey... I remember you.  You're that 'Derpy' who helped with the tornado sixteen years ago."  She laughed.  "You don't look a day older."

"Well... um... ask Rainbow Dash about it."  Derpy smiled, rubbing her foreleg.

"Relax, she told me."

"Oh."

Spitfire turned and started walking.  "Come on, I'll show you 'round."

Derpy followed, happy to have found something interesting to do.





Derpy had seen as much of the HQ as she was allowed, save the last location: the training grounds.  As they approached, they heard the rhythmic thunks of crossbows and the clangs of swords.  The two pegasi rested on a platform overlooking the training.

"LC Sweettooth and Lieutenant Apple are teaching the privates how not to die."  Spitfire joked.

Down in the grounds, a wall of young ponies, not much older than Derpy, were firing bolt after bolt into a row of training targets.  A couple were accurate, but the others needed some work.  In particular, a grey-blue unicorn with short spiky orange hair couldn't hit the side of a barn, let alone his own target.

"Hold fire."  A soft but loud voice called from next to them.  A large, heavily-built red stallion trotted up to each of them.  "Good, good, very good, needs work, needs work, good, very good..."  He stopped at the unicorn.  "Snips, where are all your bolts?"

The unicorn chuckled nervously.  "Well, some are in that one-" he pointed to one of the adjacent targets.  "-uhh, some are that one-" he gestured to the other one.  "And uuuhhhh... one is in that one...” he pointed to a target five down.

"That's... seven bolts, where are the other th-” the earth pony looked around, spotted them imbedded in the ground, and sighed.  "Oh.  Y'all might be better with a sword."

"Heh heh, yeah..."  Snips grinned awkwardly.  Apple kept reporting to the recruits and privates, more being said that sword work might be better for them.  "Alright, ten minute break everypony, then a station switch."

Spitfire smirked.  "That's my cue.  You coming?"

Derpy nodded, and the two pegasi landed on the training ground.  Almost instantly, Apple and another mare, presumably Sweettooth, bellowed instructions and the new ponies saluted towards the pegasi.

"At ease."  Spitfire said, and the mass of ponies shifted back to their normal positions.  "So, McIntosh, how're the recruits?"

"They're good."  the red earth pony said.  "A bit iffy, but training'll sort it out."

"Some of my lot are good with swords."  Sweettooth added.  "Though I can tell some of them'd be better with crossbows."

Spitfire nodded.  "Well, as long as they're good enough in a day or two.  We're expecting another offensive."

"Another?"  Sweettooth gasped, and then spat on the ground.  "Don't they ever give up?"

"Eenope."  McIntosh muttered.  "Don't worry Twist, we can take it."

"Yeah, we'll be fine."  Spitfire added, smiling.  "Oh, McIntosh, Twist, this is the time-travelling mare I told you about."

Derpy blinked, and then smiled.

"Howdy."  McIntosh said.

"Hey there."  Twist smiled, holding out a hoof for the shaking.  Derpy took it and felt like her leg was about to be taken off.

"I... uh... see you don't have a lisp anymore."  Derpy said, rubbing her leg awkwardly.

"Mhm.  Language coaches when I got into high school."  She chuckled.  "Helps with giving orders."

The three ponies started chatting, Derpy just listening in.  Stuff about recruits and crossbows and stuff.  Soon, the ten minutes passed and the recruits went to their stations.  Derpy and Spitfire decided to watch the crossbowponies first.  One by one the ponies pulled a crossbow from the ranks; some mounted them on battle saddles, some used their magic, and one or two stood on their hind legs, mouth on trigger and forelegs supporting it.  Twist told them not to act like zebras and they fell back into their positions.  One of them, a lanky, half-lidded orange unicorn, didn't have a crossbow.

"Private Slow, where's your crossbow?"  Twist asked.

"Sorry, Twist-"

"Lance Corporal."

"Sorry, Lance Corporal, but there weren't any crossbows left."

Twist blinked.  "What?"  She looked at the rack and saw that it was, in fact, empty.  "Aww, dammit."

"I... uh... made my own weapons."  Slow drawled.  "Wanna see?"

"You... made your own weapons."  Twist asked incredulously.  "Ok, what are they?"

"They're... uh... um..."  he tapped the side of his head.  "Hoofcannons."

"Hoofcannons?"

"Yep."  He levitated a pair of matching... well, the best way Derpy could describe them were tiny canons on wooden blocks with a simple mouth grip.  "It took me a while to make them."

"Well, ok, but don't blame me if they explode on you."  Twist said.  "Ok... ready and... loose!"

All the ponies shot their crossbows, some hitting the target, some missing.  Slow lifted a pair of matches to the fuses on his hoofcannons, just as the ponies fired a second volley.  In the third the matches had managed to light the fuse.  On the fourth he was aiming.  The fifth volley had just shot when the cannons fired, a pair of tremendous bangs preceding the ball of fire from each.  Two giant cast-iron spheres impacted into the target with deadly accuracy, shattering it completely.  Snips grinned, then saw the damage and the scared ponies.  "Uh... whoops."

"Snails?"  Twist muttered.

"Yeah?"

"What the hell?"





Derpy had decided to join into the training, opting for a blade.  The 'blades' were simply stupidly heavy wooden swords.  Her target was a suit of armour over a mannequin.  She held the sword in her mouth.  "'Ow ah Ah suhhoseh tah uhe hihs?"

McIntosh smiled.  "Swing your head, keep your eye on the target.  Don't swing too hard, you might break something."

Derpy nodded, the sword nearly dislocating her jaw.  She turned, and swung at the target, her eyes clenched shut.  The sword pinged off but otherwise did nothing.  "'Ow'h Ah ooh?"

"Don't swing too soft either."  He added.  "Or y'all won't do anything."

"Oh."

Swing; nothing.  Swing; nothing.  Swing; the sword dropped out of her mouth.  "Aww..."

"Maybe y'all'd be better with a bow."  McIntosh suggested, leading her to the crossbow station.  Somepony had opted out, leaving the crossbow resting on the log separating the targets and the ponies.

Derpy picked up the crossbow with her wing.  "Um... how do I use this?"

"Y'all need a battle saddle first.  Hold on."  McIntosh trotted off, returning with a olive battle saddle.  "Here, slip this on."

Derpy did so, squeezing her wing through the gap for pegasi.  McIntosh mounted the crossbow to her side and brought the trigger bit up to her mouth.  "Now, aim and shoot."

"How do I aim?"

McIntosh flipped up a device in front of her right eye; a monocle of sorts, with a targeting reticle on it.  "Use this fancy magic targeter thingy.  Ah don't use it mahself, but y'all might want to."

Derpy nodded, and closed her left eye, her tongue sticking out.  She moved her body until the reticle was a centred on the target as she could manage, then bit on the trigger.  She felt her side lurch from recoil, and the bolt hit her target... but a fair amount off where she wanted it.  It had hit just on the border of the blue outer ring.  "Aww, darn it."

"Well, y'all are much better with a crossbow than a sword."  McIntosh muttered.  "Why don't y'all try raisin' the crossbow up?"

Derpy was about to speak, when her stomach growled.  "H-hungry..."

McIntosh looked at the clock.  "Well, we all got lunch in five.  You and Spitfire go ahead."

Spitfire walked up, grinning.  "She good?"

"She's good."
"I suck at this!"

Spitfire chuckled.  "Come on, let's get you fed."

"Will there be-"





"...muffins?"  Derpy asked weakly, looking at the selection of foods.

"Nope, no muffins today."  The mare behind the counter said.  "Should'a been here yesterday."

"Hey, I remember you; you're that tomato salespony from the market!"

"No, I'm that cafeteria mare."

"But-"

"That was then, this is now.  No muffins today."

"Aww, ok, guess I'll have the carrot salad."

"Right."  The cafeteria mare said, and quickly enough produced a bowl of salady goodness.  "Don't complain or it'll be slop next time."

"O-ok."  Derpy muttered, balancing the bowl on her wing as she sat down at a bench, Spitfire opposite her.

"Well, if I'd known you'd been here, I'd have saved you a muffin."

"T-thanks..." Derpy weakly said, resting the bowl on the table.

"So…" Spitfire said, munching on a carrot.  "You're that mare Thunderlane keeps talking about."

"Huh?"

"Oh, right.  Well, as long as I've known him, he keeps talking about you and how much he missed you when you vanished and stuff."  She chuckled.  "You must have done something he liked."

Derpy blushed, leaning back a little.  "N-no!  Not like-"

Spitfire laughed.  "Sorry, but your reaction... anyway... heh heh heh..."  she looked up at her.  "But seriously, he does talk about you a lot."

"Um... I see."  She rubbed her foreleg.  "What does he usually talk about?"

"Not much.  Just how cool you were, and how much he missed you."

"Oh."

There was a light rumbling.

"Here comes everypony else."  Spitfire muttered.  A second later, the doors flung wide open, a large group of ponies walking or flying in.  Rainbow Dash was first in, followed by Thunderlane.

"Ponies!"  Derpy shouted in shock.  Spitfire laughed softly.  After a few seconds, the resulting bedlam calmed to a minor disordered mess.  Dash and Thunderlane flew over to the two other pegasi.

"Hey 'Fire, hey Derpy."  Dash said, smiling and sitting next to Spitfire.

"Hey Dash."  Spitfire replied, high-winging Dash.  "How goes?"

"Good, just got a flying session in with Soarin'."

"Awesome.  I showed Derpy around a bit."

"Cool.  Did you see the cloudroom?"

Derpy nodded.  Thunderlane sat next to her, but shuffled a little away.  The grey pegasus gave him a confused look, which Thunderlane seemed to ignore.

"What about the tower?"

Derpy nodded again.  The tower had been ok, but when she had been told what it was for she had opted to leave sooner rather than later.

"And the lookout?"

Derpy nodded once more.  The view had been spectacular.

"And the-” a hoof interrupted her.

"She saw most of the base."  Spitfire smiled.

"Ok, ok."

Thunderlane coughed.  "I don't feel so good..."

Spitfire just blinked.  "Oh?"

"Might be feather flu.  Or something.  I need to-"

"Now wait just a darn minute."  Dash retorted.  "You had feather flu last week."

"Uh... well..."

"Look, you're hiding something, and I wanna know why."

"It's private, ok?"

"Then why didn't you say so in the first place?"  Dash exclaimed, waving her hooves.

"I thought you might have pressed it."  Thuderlane sighed.  "Look, whatever the case, I need a lie down."

"Have you filled your training quota for the day?"  Spitfire asked.

"Yes I have."

"Then I guess you're allowed to.  We'll grab you when you're needed."

Thunderlane nodded, got up and trotted woozily off.  As soon as he was out of sight, Spitfire sighed.  "Wonder what's eating at him?"

Dash shrugged.  "Who knows, who cares."

Derpy blinked.  "I do."

"Well, ok, I do too, but unless it stops him doing his job, it's not something to worry about."  She stated, and began eating her meal.

Spitfire shrugged.  "I guess."

Derpy was about to say something, but for the umpteenth time she was interrupted; this time by a loud klaxon that carried through the base.

"Aww, darn it!"  Dash growled, as ponies all scrambled to their hooves and started galloping out.

"What is it?"

"They're attacking early."
> Onwards, Upwards
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


What Went Wrong?
Chapter 4 - Onwards, Upwards


Derpy had never seen so many ponies running around, yet not bumping into each other.  She, on the other hoof, kept doing so, much to the annoyance of them.  She took to hovering just above the chaos, but just under the pegasi, who sped just below the roof.  A dark-grey hoof grabbed her; Thunderlane looked into her eyes.

"Come on, Derpy, we have to get you to a safe location!"

"But-"

"No buts!  Go!"  He effectively dragged her through the gap of earthbound and winged ponies.  He finally stopped at a room, labelled 'Secure', and goaded her in.  "Stay put."

Derpy did so.  And she waited... and waited... and waited...

She was just about to fall asleep from boredom when a loud voice rang through the castle, slightly tinny.

"Good job, ponies, in setting up so fast for a defence.  However this time it took ten minutes.  Ten.  Minutes.  Make it three next time."  The voice cut out, leaving a slight, painful reverberating ring throughout the halls.

A minute later, the door opened, Thunderlane and Spitfire standing at the doorway.  The stallion smiled.  "Another drill.  Don't worry about it."  He held out a hoof to Derpy.

Derpy grabbed his hoof and lifted herself up.  "Had me worried for a second."

"Had us all worried."  Spitfire smirked.  "Luna isn't too obvious when it comes to drills."

"Aww, man!"  A (very young-sounding) colt groaned from down the hallway.  "I wanted to see some real action!"

"Pound..."  Thunderlane muttered to himself.  "Can't believe a sixteen year old joined up.  Wait here, I need to talk to him."  He flew off.

"Pound Cake?"  Derpy asked Spitfire.  "Seriously?"

"Mhm."  She smiled sadly.  "Seems like he really wanted to join."

Derpy nodded.  She heard Thunderlane arguing with the little beige pegasus about the realities of combat, how overeagerness could cost you your life, et cetera.  As the words and threats got harsher she felt her ears droop a little.  Spitfire rubbed her head.

"Don't worry, Derpy."

But she couldn't help but worry.

"...so don't go rushing in.  You're too young to be killed."

"I can't use a crossbow!"

"I didn't say you had to use a crossbow!"

"You told me to not go rushing in!"

"Don't rush in recklessly!  You'll be killed quickly!"

"Says you."

"That's how Leroy died, remember?"

"What, that idiot?  I'm not like him."

"Because you're smart enough not to just charge."

"But-"

"Pound, enough.  You're too young to even be here.  Don't waste your future on something so pointless."

Pound shut up, instead deciding to walk off, muttering oaths under his breath.  Thunderlane returned to the two mares.  "Let's hope he listens..."

Spitfire sighed.  "I don't want another repeat of last time..."





Derpy had been told that one of the VIP rooms had been cleared.  For a small room, it wasn't too bad.  Really comfortable, too.  Guess that's why it was VIP. 

She lay on the bed, and pulled out her journal, flipping through it.  It had been pretty well preserved for fifteen years.  She read some of her past entries, remembering them like they were yesterday.  She found the last one she wrote.

"Dear diary,

Today is going to be a great day!  I've got lots of shopping to do, though, but I've decided to treat myself with muffins.  (Yay muffins!)  Then I'm going to have lunch with Carrot Top at The Haybale.  I'll try not to order muffins; I don't want everypony to think I'm obsessed with them.  But they make really good muffins, so that might be hard...

Dinky's birthday is in a month.  I'm so looking forward to it!  I hope she's invited lots of friends, but Pinkie's running it so I don't have to worry about it too much.

Well, gotta go, Diary.  See you soon!  Bye!"

She had missed Dinky's birthday.  She had missed fourteen of them.  Her only family... gone.  Vanished.  Poof.

She sniffed, seeing a drop of clear liquid fall on her glasses.  The thought of Dinky, growing up without a mother... it hurt more than when she had broken her leg three... no, eighteen... years ago.

Time travel hurts your brain.

Well, I might as well write a new entry.  She thought.  Let see, it's been fifteen years, and I wrote about a page and a half every day... so... She did some fancy mathematics.  I'm going to need a new book.

She turned to where the next journal entry would have been, and saw a small, well-written note in somepony else's hoofwriting.

"Derpy,

I know what went haywire with the experiment.  Meet me in Canterlot when you can.  If you can.

Twilight Sparkle."

Derpy blinked.  "Wait... why would Twilight look through my-"  She shook her head.  "Never mind that, I have to get to Canterlot!"  She stood up, posing dramatically.  "For me!  For Dinky!  For Equestria!"





"What do you mean I can't leave?"  Derpy exclaimed.

"Dash says no."  Snowflake said matter-of-factly, staring down at her.  He was standing in front of the door heading outside and he looked like he wasn't going to be moving any time soon.

"I have to get to Canterlot!"

"Canterlot?  You crazy?"

"I need to meet Twilight Sparkle!"

"Why?"

"So I can get back to where I came from?"

"Not gonna happen."  He growled.  "Not unless Dash says yes."

An immaculately timed Rainbow Dash flew up to them.  "What's going on?"

"Derpy wants to leave."
"I need to get to Canterlot!"

"Canterlot?"  Dash asked, shocked.  "Why in Equestria would you want to go there?"

"Twilight might have a way to send me back to the past so I don't disrupt the time continuum and cause a large-scale temporal disaster!"

Dash and Snowflake just blinked.

"...So I don't wipe out time."

"Oh."

"Can I go?  Please please please?"

"Dash?"  Snowflake asked, turning to his cyan-coated companion.

"Ugh... I guess maybe."

"Yay!"

"But don't blame me if you get killed."

"Ok- wait, what?"

"Snowflake, step aside."

"Right."  The massive pony took a step aside and knocked on the door thrice.  Both doors were enveloped in magic, and swung open.  Derpy grinned, trotting out...

...only to bump into Thunderlane.

"Derpy?  What are you doing?"

"Going to Canterlot."

"Canterlot?"  Thunderlane blurted.

"Yes, Canterlot."  Derpy sighed.

"Why do-"

"Twilight might have a way to get me back to the past."

Thunderlane groaned, rubbing his muzzle with a hoof.  "Derpy, forget it.  Canterlot is being run by the CSE.  You won't even be able to get in."

"I'm not a part of the Republic, remember?"

"Oh yeah..." Thunderlane mumbled.  "Still, there's a CSE battalion coming here, and if you're intercepted..."  He grabbed her shoulders, pulling her close, muzzles almost touching.  "I can't bare anything happening to you, ok?"

Derpy blinked, then pushed him away.  "I need to get back."  She smiled.  "Don't worry, I'll be fine.  I might not be a clever pony but I am-"

The klaxon rang again.  Derpy sighed.  Thunderlane started bellowing orders, Dash flying out and getting everypony ready for an invasion.  Derpy was nearly bowled over a few times, and had to keep her wings beating to stop her falling over.

Finally, the sirens stopped.  A voice called out from the walls, complaining about another drill.  That pony was subsequently hit by a crossbow bolt in the chest and tumbled off the edge.

"We're under attaaaaaaack!"  Dash bellowed, readying a set of crossbows.

In less than three seconds everything became a whirlwind of pandemonium.  Bolts started flying, ballistae firing their tree trunk-sized arrows at targets Derpy couldn't see.  She saw Twist on one of them, loudly proclaiming wounds and kills on the others.  Derpy looked around, trying not to scream in fear.  Ten or so pegasi, clad in golden plates of armour, flew above, dropping glowing gemstones which fragmented and exploded.  One headed right for Derpy.

Now she screamed, and jumped out of the way.  She felt the heat from the blast and a shard of stone just narrowly miss her crotch.  She scrambled to her feet, and ran to the safety of the castle.

The door was locked, and the unicorns outside weren't going to open it.  Pegasi flew around in the sky, various contours and wakes mixing with each other.  The thunks of crossbows and the twangs of bows echoed around.  An armoured pony, a royal guard, landed limply with a wet thud in front of Derpy, his mane and coat stained red at places.  Derpy shrieked and ran, trying to find somewhere to go.  She bumped into a familiar orange earth pony mare, who just picked her back up.

"Darn it, Derpy, what are y'all doin'?!"

"Door locked pony dead blood help!"

"Calm down!"  Applejack ordered.  Derpy tried, then noticed that Applejack's odd leg was in fact made of metal and ceramics.  "Manticore took it off, happy?"

Derpy nodded.  She heard, and then saw, Big McIntosh and Apple-Bloom run up to the two of them.  "Applejack!"

"Took ya long enough!"  Applejack smirked, just as a whole wing of gold-clad pegasi circled them.  Derpy cowered.  The three Apple family members formed into a triangle.

"Surrender now and you will not be harmed!"  One of the white pegasi bellowed.

"Up yours!"  Applejack laughed.  Big McIntosh pulled out a sword.  Apple-Bloom kicked her strange-looking crossbow into gear, the string glowing.

"Die, scum!"

That was the last thing he said before his face was smashed in with a ceramic hoof.  Big McIntosh jumped forward and knocked another guard's helmet off.  Apple-Bloom's crossbow shot in rapid succession, the string automatically pulling back and firing.

The guards lasted all of thirty seconds.  Applejack chuckled, wiping her bloodied hooves on the guard she just snapped the neck of.  "Never mess with the Apple Family."

Derpy opened her eyes, but shut them again after seeing the violence wreaked on the royal guards.  Big McIntosh patted her head.  "Better them than you."

Apple-Bloom helped Derpy up.  "Y'all need t'get somewhere safe!"

"I need to go to Canterlot!  Twilight can help me!"

Applejack slowly turned her neck to face Derpy.  "Twilight?"

"Yes!"

Applejack was on Derpy in a second, a prosthetic hoof raised to cause some serious pain.  Big McIntosh pulled her off Derpy before she could do any harm.

"Don't y'all mention that... that... traitor!"  Applejack roared, trying to get to Derpy, hooves flailing.  Apple-Bloom helped Derpy up again, whispering for her to run.

Derpy complied.





She sat down, having found an area away from the battle.  She could hear it way off, though, but with some whooshes of flame and zaps of lightning joining in.  She sighed, remembering the aftermath of Applejack's hoofwork.  Those poor ponies...

A couple of pegasi landed right in front of her, startling her.  They were royal guards, as their golden armour proclaimed.  One of them, a stallion, raised a spear to her throat.  Another, a mare, readied a crossbow.

"H-hi."  Derpy squeaked, raising her hooves.

"She's unarmed."  The mare muttered to her companion, gesturing to the grey pegasus in front of them.

The stallion still held the spear at the ready, eyeing Derpy over.  "Yeah, but I still wouldn't be too careful.  These Lunatics have some nasty ways..."

"You've been paying too much attention to the propaganda, Point."  The mare smirked, walking up to Derpy.  "Besides, you don't look like PLR."

"I-I'm not... I'm just a VIP."  Derpy said quietly.  "I can't even use a crossbow."

"I see."  The mare murmured.  "We should take her with us."

"I guess so."  The stallion said, lifting his spear up so it wasn't at Derpy's throat.

"Yeah, yeah, stop complaining and move your fla-" the mare started, but froze.  She fell over limply, a crossbow bolt in her rump.  The stallion turned, but got a bolt in his leg for his trouble.  He looked at it, then the green goo surrounding it.  "Damn..."  He fell, his armour clattering loudly.

Derpy shrieked, scooting to the nearest wall.  Thunderlane dropped right in front of her.

"Derpy, are you ok?"

"Y-you killed them!"

"Paralysis.  I never kill ponies."

Derpy blinked.  "Uh..."

"I only kill cockatrices and manticores.  I may be military but there are some things I don't do."

"What if-"

"Do you want to get out of here or not?"  Thunderlane snapped, leaning towards her.

Derpy nodded.

"Good, because that's where we're going."





Thunderlane had lead them over the walls, a fair distance from the battle.  Derpy could still see the pegasi flying and shooting at each other.  The occasional bolt landed a fair distance away.  Thunderlane gestured to the forest.

"There.  Dash'll understand why I did this."

Derpy trotted up to him.  "Why...?"

"I... I didn't want to see you getting hurt.  This war is bloody enough as is."  He sighed.  "Head to Ponyville Library.  Tell them the thunder sent you."

"'The thunder'?"  Derpy asked, smiling.  "Sounds mysterious."

Thunderlane nodded.  "Better than using my normal name."

"It isn't that much different, you know."  Derpy giggled.  Thunderlane blushed.

She turned to face the (still rather scary) Everfree forest, gulped, put on a brave face and started walking.

"Wait, Derpy!"  Thunderlane called out.  Derpy spun around; Thunderlane was standing right behind her.

He leaned in and pressed his lips to hers, using his forehooves to pull her closer.  Derpy blushed, her wings shooting out in response.  Thunderlane's did as well.

After a good, solid minute, he pulled off.  "Sorry, but I've been wanting to do that for eighteen years."

"Buh..."  Derpy managed to vocalise.

Thunderlane sighed.  "Well, if Twilight's plan goes well, I can tell you about my crush sooner."

Derpy just blinked, her face a bright scarlet.

"Derpy, you have to go now."  Thunderlane insisted, pointing to the forest.  Derpy didn't move.  "Derpy, go."

"What?"  Derpy said, snapping back into reality.  "Oh, yeah, right."  She giggled awkwardly, and then galloped into the thick foliage.





After she had made some distance between her and the Fort, she found a nice rock to sit on.  It wasn't a chair by any means, but it had to do.

I just got kissed.

She put a hoof to her lips, blushing, remembering what just happened.

By Thunderlane.

She felt a yearning to go back, to talk to Thunderlane about... stuff.  But he wanted her to leave.  It was safer.  Or was it?

Of course it is.  Did you see the horrible fighting?  She could still hear the fight, now with some loud dull thuds and soft roars mixed in to it.

She decided to get moving, hopefully find somewhere to hunker down for the inevitable night.  Which, considering the orange lights poking through the treetops, was going to happen very soon.

She trotted along the dusty path, when she heard galloping behind her.  And a lot of it.  Panicking, she vaulted into a nearby bush and hid, poking her head out.

A whole throng of ponies, hundreds of them, all wearing identical golden armour (save for a few in robes or other types of uniform) thundered past.  She saw the paralysed stallion being carried on a stretcher.  Another stallion was barking orders of retreat.  Eventually the mass ended, trailing off further into the dense forest.  Derpy poked her head out, the rest of her body following.

She sighed with relief.  That meant the battle was over.





She followed the trail the army had taken until she reached the point where the cockatrice had ambushed her.  Its body was still laying there, a couple of flies circling around it.  Derpy's eyes lingered on it.  Do its eyes still do that stoning thing if it's dead?

She sighed, turning her head to the rest of the path.  Then she remembered something.  She spun, looking at where Dash had gone when the cockatrice ambushed them.  Curiosity took a hold of her, and she trotted into the bushes.

The bushed ended at a little clearing, a small orange shaft of light poking through.  A single large stone sat in the middle of it.  A few birds and butterflies danced around.  Derpy stepped forward, and right up to the stone.


Here lies
Fluttershy
Whose brave sacrifice will not be in vain
I will We will always love you


Derpy looked down, and bounced back with horror.  She was standing on a grave.  Fluttershy's grave.

She heard a pony land behind her.  "Derpy, what are you doing here?"

Derpy turned to see Rainbow Dash, who looked a little worse for wear; her flight jacket had some tears in it, and she had a couple of bruises and cuts.

Derpy stammered.  "Th-Thunderlane let me-"

"I know about that, girl."  Rainbow walked up.  "I mean, what are you doing here?"

"I... I was curious about... when you left and we got attacked..."

Dash hummed a reply, then sat next to Fluttershy's grave.  "Hey Fluttershy.  How are you doing?"

Derpy took a few step back respectfully.

"Yeah, I'm doing alright.  Got into a nasty fight.  Good to see you're doing better than me, though."  She chuckled mirthlessly.  "Damn, I still wish it was me..."  She leaned down to the grave, kissing the earth.  "Miss ya heaps."

"What... what happened?"  Derpy asked hesitantly.

Dash sighed, standing up.  "About a year ago, Fluttershy and I were serving together.  She was head of the Medical Wing, I was in charge of the Aerial Wing."  She closed her eyes.  "She wanted to see a battle, to see where all the injuries were coming from.  I kept telling her 'no, don't, you'll get hurt'.  But she had been mailing Iron Will a lot."  She chuckled that sad chuckle again.  "Anyways, we got into the battle, but far enough away, but we were ambushed.  She..."  She sniffed, a tear dropping.  "She didn't have a chance.  Bolt to the chest.  Not an instant, quick, painless death, too."

Derpy stepped forward, as Dash kept talking, fighting sobs.  "I got one in the wing.  I... I tore those guys apart.  In front of her..."  Dash fell to her haunches.  "She didn't blame me, though.  She never did.  She blamed herself for getting in the way.  Said that she should have listened to me.  I..."

Derpy sat across from Dash.

"It was my fault... I gave in to her... I..."

And with that, anything Dash said was lost in the wailing of a pony who had one of the best parts of her life savagely and slowly torn away from her.





An hour passed, and Dash had decided to go back to base.  Derpy decided to stay for a little while to keep Fluttershy company, and waved as Dash flew off.

"H-hey Fluttershy..." She quietly muttered.  "I... I'm sorry.  I don't know what to say.  I'm not used to talking to dead ponies."  She chuckled.  "So yeah.  I'm back after fifteen years.  Everypony seems... hurt.  It's like I've stepped into a whole new world.  But Twilight's got a plan to get me back.  Hopefully I can stop this from ever happening or something..."

She sat down, looking at Fluttershy's grave.  "I don't know much about time and stuff.  I leave that to the smart ponies."  She could imagine Fluttershy saying that the grey pegasus was a smart pony.  "Heh heh, thanks.  But I really need to get to Ponyville.  So... sorry, I have to go."  She got up

A soft breeze blew through the trees, sounding an awful lot like a goodbye from the meek butter-coloured pegasus.  She blinked.  "Freaky..."





She staggered out of the forest, and saw that night had fallen on the ruins of Ponyville.  Luna's moon shone brightly, a series of shooting stars streaking across the sky.  "So... pretty..."

She needed to sleep.  She knew that.   But she needed to get to the library first.  Or a bed.

Slowly, she walked into town, threatening to topple over from the breeze.  The streets were bare.  Not just of ponies, but objects too.  The buildings seemed like gigantic skeletons in the night, looming over her.

Finally, she saw the library, and her eyes lightened up.  She staggered quickly towards it, desperate to stop and sleep.

She saw a pony move on the balcony.  "Stop!  Don't move!"

Derpy didn't stop.  "Can't...!  Need...!  To...!  Sleep...!"

"Stop or I will shoot!"

"The... Thunder... sent..."

THUNK!

She toppled over, faceplanting.  There was a sharp pain in her leg.  She tried to get up, but she couldn't.  Her body wasn't responding.  She tried crawling, but gave up after a metre.

She closed her eyes.  She desperately wanted to sleep.  She needed to sleep.  She needed to get to the library... but she needed the sleep more.

She gave up.  Sleep first.

"You idiot, you shot her!"

Sleep now.

...
	
> Well-earned Rest
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


What Went Wrong?
Chapter 5 - Well-earned Rest


Derpy woke up.  She was lying on her own, soft bed.  In her own room.  She looked around.  Everything was clear and colourful, just as it should be.  She smiled.  It was just a bad dream... that thing with Thunderlane and Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash.

She happily trotted out of her room, and was greeted by a cheerful glomp from Dinky.  "Hi mummy!  Look what I made!"  She pulled a muffin out from somewhere, showing it to Derpy.

"Ooh, muffins!"  Derpy chimed, and on request from Dinky took a hearty bite.  It tasted like... dust?  Eeeew!

Not wanting to dissolve her daughter's happiness, she feigned its deliciousness, vowing to put the contents of her mouth in the bin.  Her daughter bounced off to her room.

Derpy looked at the muffin.  It was green and looked more like broccoli than a muffin.  "Dinky?"

"Yes mummy?" The little voice of the pony replied from the small room.

"What did you put into this muffin?"

"Muffin-y stuff!"

Derpy looked at the muffin again.  It fell apart, crumbling to the ground.  "Ok then."

"Why, you don't like it?"

"No no no, it's good.  Just..."  She pushed the broccomuffin to a corner.  "...a little..."

Thankfully Dinky didn't press it.  Derpy sighed, rinsed her mouth out with water, and then walked out into the sunshine.  Ponies happily playing and laughing and talking and being ponies.  Rainbow Dash must have made today the sunniest she could.  She took a breath in... Odd, was it supposed to be this dusty?  Why was everything so dusty at the moment?

Everything looked clean, not a piece of dust anywhere.  Weird.  She shrugged and trotted forward, heading to the post office.

She froze.  A massive, swirling, nasty looking dust cloud, zapping with lightning tumbled its way to Ponyville.  She shrieked.

Nopony noticed, laughing like nothing was wrong.  She saw Fluttershy sucked up by the storm, and by the noise it made, she could only imagine what it was doing to her.  More and more ponies were caught in it, not even a scream coming from their mouth.  The storm grew stronger with each pony, the lightning more frequent.  Or was just the closeness of it?

Derpy grabbed Thunderlane by the shoulders.  "Thunderlane!  Run!  Fly!"

"Why?  Nothing's wrong."  He calmly said, smiling, oblivious of the storm ripping towards him.

"There's a massive lightning-y dust storm coming towards us!"

"No there isn't."  He said.

"There is!  See?"  She pointed, then turned his head to it, then tried to drag him.  He just blinked, not moving at all.

"I can only see the sun."  He turned to face Derpy, a look on concern on his face.  "Are you feeling alright?"

Derpy was about to reply, but she noticed the storm was no more than three ponies' lengths away.  She squealed and galloped a distance, turning to see Thunderlane consumed by the storm, the lightning sparking furiously.

"Thunderlane!"

She stood still, deciding what to do.  Run in and try to save him (and probably die), or run away and get consumed eventually (and probably die).

She breathed in.  Brave pony time.

She galloped towards the storm, her fear fighting her determination in her gut.  The storm got closer... and closer... and closer... and then she was being sucked up, and felt her body being assaulted from all sides, tearing into her and pulling her apart atom by atom.





She woke up.  She shot up on bed, and then realised she had been screaming and shut her mouth.  She felt a hoof on her leg, and saw a very, very tired looking Nurse Redheart smiling sadly at her.

"Shh... easy, easy... you're safe now..."

Derpy looked at herself.  Her coat was matted from sweat, her tail a tangled mess.  She felt for her glasses and saw they were missing.  She felt her heart beating faster.

"Your glasses are on the table.  They were broken, probably from your fall, but... they seemed to have been fixed."  Redheart picked them up in her hoof, examining them.  "Strange..."

"They're really-" Derpy croaked.  She paused to clear her throat.  "They're really cool.  They have an auto-repair spell as well as an eye focusing spell."

Redheart nodded.  "I see.  Well, that makes things easier."

"So... what happened?"  Derpy asked, rubbing her head.

"You came trudging into town from the Everfree Forest, then started walking up.  Caramel called for you to stop but you didn't.  He... he shot you.  But he really regrets it."

Derpy sighed leaning back onto the bed.  It felt cold, the sweat dampening the sheets... or, she hoped it was sweat, or at least water.

"We know Thunderlane sent you.  He was... just firing as you said 'thunder'."

Derpy then noticed a bandage around her hoof, where she remembered feeling a sharp stabbing pain.  It had a small red stain on one point.

"You'll need to rest for a day or two, unfortunately.  Your leg needs time to heal.  Anything you need?"

"Water, please."  Derpy croaked.  Redheart had presumably known about this, and poured her a glass of water from a jug.  She gulped it down greedily, but swirled the last mouthful around, swallowing it.  "Thank you."

"Not a problem."

There was a knock on the door (there was a door?).  Redheart turned.  "Yes?"

"It's me."  A stallion said.  "Can I come in?"

Redheart turned to the pegasus, who nodded.  "You can."

The door creaked open, and a yellowy-orange stallion walked in, smiling.  "Hey Derpy."

"Hey Caramel."  Derpy said.

"Sor- uh... how are you?"

"I'm... well, I'm ok, I think."  Derpy slid the glasses on, then smiled.  "You?"

"As well as any pony can be in this sort of situation."  He muttered.  "Sorry I shot you."

"Sorry I didn't stop."

Caramel chuckled.  "Can you walk around?"

"I don't think she can, not yet."  Redheart said.  "You did shoot her in the-"

"I know, I know."

Derpy frowned, and then slid out of bed, standing up.  She didn't feel sore.  She took a few steps, with only a slight twinge of pain from the wound.  She smiled at the wide-eyed ponies in front of her.





"Welcome to our little band of lost ponies."  Caramel solemnly welcomed, gesturing a hoof to the others.

"Lost ponies?"

"Ponies who have been lost, or have lost things they held or hold dear to them."  He sighed.  "I'm one of the lucky few who didn't lose anything worthy of note."

"What did you lose?"

"Applejack, but she's a strong-"

"Applejack?"  Derpy interrupted, head tilting.

"The only mare I loved.  But as long as she's doing fine, then I'm ok."

Derpy could have pointed out the manticore, the hate, the anger... but she kept herself quiet.

"In any case, I don't really spend much time around these ponies.  I... I feel their pain, even if I don't know it.  That's why I'm always on the balcony, watching out for ponies."

Derpy nodded.  Caramel lead her down the wooden steps to the ground floor.  She saw Cheerilee sitting in front of a small group of foals, teaching them some basic arithmetic.

"You know Cheerilee, right?"

Derpy nodded again.

"She teaches all the foals we manage to find.  It's... sad how many are orphaned by the war."

Cheerilee looked up and smiled, then turned her attention to the foals again.

"It's depressing..."

"Yeah..."  Derpy sighed.  "What did she lose?"

"Her job, sort of.  I think she also had her coltfriend or husband or something sign up with the Republic."

"Who?"

"Can't remember, but she was mortified when she heard."

"I can imagine..."





Caramel lead them downstairs to the basement, where the smell of oven gas and cooking vegetables hit her nose like a crossbow bolt... and she knew how that felt.

"Zecora's at work."  Caramel sniffed.  "And Pinkie."

They trotted down; Zecora was leaning over a cooking pot on top of a stove, swirling a wooden spoon.  Pinkie Pie, her colours darker and her mane flat, looked over, occasionally throwing something in to it.  Two unicorns, one mint-green and the other with a white coat and striking blue mane, were in one corner of the space, discussing things.  Another, azure coated, was huddled in a corner with a blanket wrapped around her... or a cloak.

"Hello Zecora."  Caramel called out.  Everpony turned to see him, but then all turned away, save the zebra.

"Hello Caramel."  Zecora muttered in her accented voice.  Derpy blinked, expecting more to come out from her.

"Smells good.  What's for dinner?"

"The usual.  We are running low on our supplies of cabbage."

"Well then.  Guess we'll have to find some."

Or we could ask the Republic if they have any.  Derpy thought.

"Archer should be returning super soon."  Pinkie drawled, all the cheer drained from her voice.  "Hopefully she didn't die."

"She's too good at what she does to just die, Pinkie."  Caramel said, patting Pinkie on the back.  "Oh, and our guest's woken up."

Pinkie turned to see Derpy, and smiled.  "Hiya, Derpy."

"H-hey."  Derpy weakly replied.  "It's been... um... a while."

Pinkie chuckled.  "Yeah, I really missed you.  Then again I miss anypony who's gone for a long time."

"S-sorry..."  Derpy sighed.  Pinkie waved a hoof dismissively.

"It was not your fault."  Zecora muttered.  "Twilight was playing with things she did not entirely understand."

Derpy nodded.  Zecora was right, in a sense.  But Derpy had gone along with it, so she was partially responsible herself.

Sighing, she trotted over to the azure mare, while Caramel talked with Pinkie and Zecora about lunch.  The mare remained huddled, her eyes staring vacantly.

"Hi."  Derpy said.  The mare's violet eyes snapped to her, her head turning slowly.  "Are you ok?"

"Trixie is fine.  She does not need your help."  Trixie monotoned.

"Wait, Trixie?"  Derpy asked, head tilting.  "As in the Great and Powerful Trixie?"

"No.  Just Trixie."  The azure mare mumbled, looking away.  "Leave Trixie alone.  She does not want to speak with you."

Derpy blinked.  "Well... what about you?"

"Who?"

"You.  Not Trixie."

"Trixie does not get it."

"Well, if you're speaking on behalf of Trixie, can't I just talk to you instead?"

"She still doesn't get it."

Caramel trotted over and lead Derpy away.  "Sorry, Trixie.  She's new here."

Trixie muttered something, and then resumed her vacancy.  Derpy frowned at Caramel.  He returned her glare with a measured warning of a look.

"Trixie is seriously traumatised, Derpy."

"Why?"

"She got hit the hardest out of us.  She had her home destroyed in the Blitz.  Her family were shot by the PLR.  Her coltfriend died in her arms after a CSE strike on Ponyville."

"Blitz?  CSE?"  Derpy asked.

Caramel sighed.  "It'll take a while to explain."





The Blitz was a strategic assault on Hoofington, Trixie's old home, by Luna's forces.  Lightning strikes preceded, a now-common trademark of the PLR's attack, and then their forces flew in.  Hoofington's guards were vastly outnumbered and underpowered, and were gone in minutes; captured or killed.  The civilian population scattered.  A lot of families evacuated.  Some stayed and were also captured.  Some fought back and died.

Trixie's family stayed, but didn't fight.  All except her father.  When the PLR came in, they killed him, then the rest of her family.  She received a letter two months later, when she was performing in Trottingham.

Hoofington was captured but, like Ponyville, was destroyed in the number of further conflicts.

The CSE is the Celestian Solar Empire, although rumour is that Celestia hates the name.  When the Republic broke away from the Kingdom of Equestria, the remnants were called, collectively, the Solar Empire.  As more of it broke off to become neutral, like us, it became the Celestian Solar Empire.

"... and that's it.  Any other questions?"

Derpy sat and thought hard.  "I thought the Republic were the good ponies."

"It's hard to say who the good ponies are."  Caramel looked out to the rest of Ponyville.  The two of them had ended up at the balcony.  Derpy noted the large crossbow attached to the railing and the racks of bolts near it.  "I think we're the good ponies, but that's because we're not blasting everything to Tartarus.  We're still guilty of a few things."

"But... the Empire is always attacking the Republic."

"Only because the Republic can't.  They'd be stretching themselves too thin, and they'd collapse.  The Empire has supply trains.  The Republic only has the small farms and storehouses."

"What's going on with Thunderlane?"

Caramel looked at her and tilted his head.

"How come you guys are on such friendly terms?"

"Oh, that.  Well, we maintain a contact ring between the Republic, Empire, and FPM.  It's how we know what's going on."

Derpy frowned.  "What if they use that info to make an attack?"

"We only pass down information that ponies need.  Like if a family member or lover dies, then we can tell them."

"But... what about Thunderlane?"

"What about him?"

Derpy looked into Caramel's eyes.  "What if he finds out that he's communicating with the Empire?"

Caramel smiled.  "We have contingencies.  If he's thought to be a spy, then he can prove it.  We log all our conversations.  If he's told to be a spy for us, he'll just fake it until he can't, then he'll claim that the information stopped coming."

Derpy nodded.  "So, who's the contact at the Empire?"

"Sweetie Belle."

"As in the little filly?"

"The same.  Though she's older than you at the moment."

Derpy blinked.  Time travel really does your head in.

"Is that all?  Because I think it's time for dinner."





Dinner wasn't all that magnificent.  Mainly soup and apple juice, with some hard apple cider for the adults.

Pinkie's mane was poofed up, her colours returning.  She was grinning, but softly.  She and Cheerilee were playing with the foals, who seemed to enjoy the attention.  A melody was being played by Lyra, with an accompaniment by Vinyl Scratch.  Bon Bon, another survivor, was watching Lyra play.  Zecora and Trixie were not around.  Caramel and Derpy sat next to each other.

"So... you said you've all lost something."

"Yep."

"What has everypony else lost?"

Caramel sighed.  "A lot.  More than me."

He gestured over to Lyra and Bon Bon.  "Those two lost their home in the war.  Well, we all have, but some didn't care as much as they did.  They wanted a peaceful lifestyle.  A happy, calm, serene life.  But the war took it away."

Derpy couldn't help but think they were in lo-

"They're not in love."

Derpy blushed.  "H-how did you...?"

"Everypony thinks that.  But no, they're not in love.  Lyra has a coltfriend in the CSE."

"Bon Bon?"

"She's never thought about it."

"Wait, how do you know all of this?"

"I'm like the FPM's therapist."  He pointed to Vinyl.  "She took the war pretty hard.  Her house was removed to make room for a shelter which never got built.  Her friend Octavia left Equestria.  The club she worked at was the first building to go."

Vinyl was smiling, her trademark glasses covering her eyes.  Derpy frowned.  "She seems so happy, though."

"She's not.  You will not believe how many times she's cried into my chest."

"Then..."

Caramel sighed.  "She wants everypony else to be happy, so she acts happy.  It's real enough you can't help but feel a little warmer, but fake enough to know she isn't feeling it."

Derpy asked about Zecora.  Caramel tapped his hoof on his chin, trying to remember.

"Zecora's home was destroyed by the Republic, and her Equestrian citizenship terminated by the Empire.  So she came here, to a bunch of ponies who didn't care if she wasn't a pony."

"What about her rhyming?"

"Oh, that?  She dropped it so she could speak clearer.  Hard to justify your position in court when you speak in riddles and rhymes."

"What about Pinkie?"

"Job gone, room lost, Cakes packing up shop and leaving to Manehattan."  He sighed, swirling his cider around.  "She had a heart attack when she heard about the Cake's twins signing up for war."  He looked at Derpy.  "I'm not kidding."

Derpy once again blinked.  Pinkie having a heart attack?  She just couldn't see it.

"Luckily Redheart was here by then.  Got her right back on her hooves.  She changed, though."  He took a sip of his drink.  "She found a sort of chemical which makes ponies happy.  She calls it 'Joy', and she's addicted to it."

Ok, this was getting weird.  Pinkie?  Addicted to drugs?  She really couldn't see any of this.

"She's on it now.  Takes it before talking to the foals.  They don't know, they don't care, all they need is some joy."  He sighed, deep and hard.  "This war broke so many ponies..."

"How did it start?"

Caramel looked up.  "You don't know?"  Derpy shook her head.  "Surprising, but understandable.  It pretty much goes like this:  Luna got angry at Celestia, Celestia got angry at Luna, Luna broke away from the Kingdom, loyal ponies following her.  Then she started attacking other towns."

Derpy frowned.  "Luna started it?"

"Looks like it, but a lot of us are missing the details."

"What happened to Ponyville?"

"Ponyville..."  Caramel shut his eyes, looking like he was ready to sleep.  "About the last place for ponies to be safe, the only town which nopony dared to attack... then the Empire did.  Half the town died, most of them refugees from the rest of Equestria.  Caught in the crossfire.  A number of the residents fled, the rest of us hid.  We've been here since before the war, and we're not going to leave."

Derpy sighed.  Such a loss of life...

"Archer!"  Pinkie squealed in her drug-fuelled happiness.  "You're back!"

A blue and... blue... young earth pony trotted in, saddlebags laden with stuff.  She looked tired, and a bit troubled.  "I am."

"What'dya bring?"  Pinkie asked, bouncing up.

"More food, and some news."

"Food first!"

The foals all agreed.  Archer complied, dumping all the food down on the table, where Pinkie and the foals picked through, pulling out the good food and taking it down to the basement.  Derpy spotted some old muffins in the pile of discarded foods.  She picked the box up: it was a few weeks past its use-by date, and looked like it.

"Ew..."

"So, Archer."  Caramel asked, finishing his drink.  "What's new?"

"I got word from Mac.  Dash's hurt bad, and Thunder is in a critical condition."

Derpy's ear twitched.  "Thunder?  As in Thunderlane?"

Archer nodded.  "Poor guy.  The way McIntosh said it, seems like he's not going to pull through.  Dash just got knocked about, she’ll-"

"N-no!"  Derpy squeaked, shaking her head.  "H-he will pull through!  He has to!"

Archer frowned and turned to Caramel.  "'Mel?"

"Yes?"

"Who is she?"





Derpy had been given a bed near Caramel's sniping point.  She thought it might be because they needed to keep an eye on her.  Caramel was watching for ponies, his hoof resting on the trigger bit.  He looked bored, but also thoughtful.

She couldn't sleep.  Not only was she buzzing with energy from her earlier sleep, but the news about Thunderlane had shaken her.

Why am I so worried about it?  Thunderlane is just a friend... right?  I mean, yeah, I should be worried about friends anyway... but...

If she ever got back to her normal time, she had a lot to talk to Thunderlane about.

"Hey, you!"  Caramel shouted.  "Stop!"

"It's me you idiot!"  Archer called back.

"Oh.  Come on in."

Derpy sighed.  She needed to sleep.  She really really needed to sleep.

She heard hoofbeats trot up towards her.  "Derpy?"  It was Archer.

Derpy groaned.

"Are you awake?"

"Uh huh..."

"Good.  I need to tell you something."

Derpy didn't like where this was heading.  Not at all.  She sat up and looked Archer in the eyes.

"What's wrong?"

"I got word from McIntosh... I'm sorry, but... Thunderlane didn't make it."

Derpy blinked, her eyes widening.  No... he couldn't be dead.  He just couldn't.  He was tough, strong, brave, noble... he can't just die.

"Again, I'm sorry..."  Archer said, walking slowly off.  Caramel sighed, then turned away to keep watch.

"Thanks for telling me..."  Derpy croaked, her throat clenching.

Archer looked at her sadly, and then trotted downstairs.

"I hate this war..."  Caramel muttered.





Derpy didn't want to get up.  She didn't want to eat.  She didn't want to do anything except lie in bed and cry.

Caramel sighed.  "I know it's bad, Derpy... but if you don't get moving, you will never see him again."

"I'll never see him again anyway."

Archer raised an eyebrow.  "He won't be dead in the past."

"How did...?"  Derpy asked, before giving up.  News of her temporal displacement spread like parasprites.

"Look, you need to get to Canterlot."  Caramel said.  "Then you can hopefully fix all of this."

"How is she supposed to get into the most fortified city in all of Equestria?  The trains are CSE only."

"I have an idea, but it's a bit risky."  Caramel said.  "It involves... less-than-pleasant situations."

"Such as?"

"Being a prisoner of the CSE, for one."

"Oh."  Archer sighed.  "Derpy?"

Derpy sighed.  "You tell me my friend is dead, then I have to be a prisoner."

"Don't worry, you'll be perfectly fine."  Caramel said.

Archer led Caramel away, the two of them talking softly.  Derpy strained to listen in, but she heard 'Sweetie Belle', 'prisoner', 'Twilight' and something she barely heard as 'Dinky'.  They trotted back.

"Do you want to see your daughter?"

Derpy's eyes widened.  To see her daughter after... well, for her, a few days, but for Dinky, it would be fifteen years.

She nodded.

"Then here's the plan."  Caramel smirked.
> Canterlot Inbound
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


What Went Wrong?
Chapter 6 - Canterlot Inbound


Derpy hated this plan.

It was depressing enough finding out that Thunderlane had died last night, from a crossbow bolt in the chest.  But now she had to be 'captured' by the Celestian Solar Empire and brought to Canterlot via train as a prisoner.

However, the only problem was the 'capture' itself.  Neither Archer nor Caramel had the faintest idea how they were going to pull that one off.

Caramel leaned on the balcony rail, letting the sun soak into his coat.  "We'll need to get SB to organise it."

Archer sighed, drinking from a mug.  "I still think this plan is too risky."

"And any other plan isn't?"

Archer's silence spoke volumes.

Derpy sat on her bed, arms crossed.  She didn't want to go.  She just wanted to stay here and be sad.

"So, how do we get her captured?"  Caramel muttered to himself.  "She could walk up to them but then we can't control what'll happen."

The next few minutes were filled with silence.

"Wait, I have an idea."  Archer said, her eyes brightening a little.

"Shoot."  Caramel replied, turning to her.

"A raid."

"A raid?"  Derpy asked.

"The CSE has this method of capture where we- I mean, they barge into a place and take the person by force."  Archer explained.

Caramel frowned.  "You mean you're going to let the CSE know where we live?"

"Of course not, I'm not an idiot."  Archer rolled her eyes.  "We'll stage it."

Caramel smirked.  "Ok, that'll work."

Derpy sighed.  This won't end well...





Derpy sat down on a dilapidated chair in the ruins of Sugarcube Corner.  "I don't like this plan."

Caramel sighed, closing the fridge in the kitchen; part of the wall had collapsed between it and the main room.  "I know, but if you want to see Dinky and Twilight, it's about the best plan we've got."

"So, I just sit here and let them take me?"

"No, that's not convincing."  Caramel said.  "You'll have Archer and me backing you up."

Derpy groaned.  "Convincing...?"

"When they come, hide.  When they grab you, resist."

"Right..."  Derpy drawled.

"Oh come on, it'll be worth it to see Dinky again, right?"

If she still wants to see me... Derpy thought to herself.





It was late afternoon, the orange lights filtering through the dusty room.  Caramel and Archer were playing some sort of card game, with some crossbows lingering near them.  Derpy sat across from them, half-watching their game, half lost in thought.

Thunderlane's dead... I can't talk to him again... I can't see him again... not unless I can find Twilight.  But what if it doesn't work?  What if it just sends me even further in time?

"I win."  Archer chimed, much to Caramel's chagrin.

"That's 40 games in a row..." Caramel moaned, leaning back in defeat.

"Come on, admit it, you suck at this game."

"I don't suck, you're just better at it."

"You lost to Pinkie."

"You lost to Pinkie too, remember?"

"I didn't!  I forfeited!"

"Nopony has won against Pinkie."

Archer sighed.  "She's too darn lucky."

"I'll say."

Silence descended again.  Caramel turned to Derpy.  "Hey, do you want a go?"

"Sure."  Derpy muttered, and Archer moved from her spot as Derpy took it.  "How does this game work again?"





"I don't believe it..."  Caramel muttered, completely in shock.  His eyes were wide and disbelieving.  "I lost... again."

Derpy smiled.  "I guess I'm just lucky myself."

Archer chuckled.  "Or Caramel really does suck."

"I do not suck!"  Caramel blurted, blushing in embarrassment.  "You're just better than me!"

"Face it, you've only won against Vinyl, when she was drunk, and that was only a fluke."

Caramel pouted.  "Shut up, I won fair and square."

"Vinyl didn't even know what game she was playing, and still she almost beat you."

Caramel frowned, blushing even more.  The mares giggled, prompting him to feel even more awkward.

Of course, the cheery, awkward atmosphere was lost when a few golden-plated dark-grey unicorns burst into the room.

Derpy shrieked and scampered to her hooves, running into the kitchen.  Caramel and Archer lifted up their crossbows.  One of the unicorns pointed a hoof to where Derpy fled, another followed.

"Stand down and things won't get messy.”

Caramel sneered.  "Make me."

Derpy, meanwhile, found a nice, dark, smelly and cramped cupboard to hide in.  She could hear the chinking of armour and the hoofbeats from the guard who followed her.  "Come out now and I promise you won't be harmed."

She said nothing in reply.  She heard doors being opened, as the guard flung every cupboard and pantry door open.  "Don't make this harder than it has to be."

She saw a magic field envelop the door, then it being flung open.  The guard frowned.  "There you-"

Make it convincing.  Derpy screamed and charged into the unicorn, knocking him to his haunches.  The guard cried out in pain, and then kept swinging his head at her, his sharp horn passed inches from her glasses.  She raised a hoof up and smacked the guard on the helmet, the metal surface hurting her hoof more than the guard's head underneath.

Clutching her sore hoof, she felt herself being lifted up, and saw her body was enveloped in a magic aura.  She tried to flail but she couldn't; this unicorn's magic aura was just too strong.

"Celestia-dammit, why do they always resist?" The guard groaned, carrying Derpy out.  Fortunately he was careful enough not to let her head hit anything.

When she floated out of the kitchen, she noticed that Caramel and Archer had been disarmed; their crossbows lay on the ground with limp strings.  The guard leader smiled, sheathing his sword.  "Easiest raid ever; almost like they wanted us to capture her."

Derpy blinked, hoping they didn't actually believe it was a staged event.

"Well, good thing this thing didn't break out into violence.  The Lieutenant would kill me if it did, if I didn't go in combat myself."

Caramel chuckled sarcastically.  "Just don't hurt her."

"We treat our prisoners with respect, unlike your Republic."

Derpy was carried out into the open night sky, still unable to move.





She was lowered into a train carriage, and two of the guards positioned themselves across from her.  The senior of them shackled Derpy up.

"Don't try anything, ok?"

Derpy nodded solemnly.  The train jolted forward and soon they were off.

Derpy looked down at her hooves.  The manacles were heavy and uncomfortable.  Her hoof was sore from that poorly thought-out attack.  She felt tired and exhausted.  And, to top it all off, Thunderlane was dead.

"Sorry about the rough treatment."  The junior guard said sympathetically.  "It's kind of necessary, though."

"It's ok... I've just been having a bad few days..."

"We all do."  The senior guard muttered, turning away.  "My son died in a raid it a few months ago."

"My best friend died last night."  Derpy murmured.

The junior guard gasped, and then sighed sadly.  "I'm so sorry..."

"It's ok..."

"The recent siege at the PLR HQ?"

Derpy nodded.

"Well, we're permanently assigned to Canterlot and the trains.  We don't see much actual fighting."  The senior said.  "So... well, we weren't responsible."

Derpy sighed, closing her eyes.

The junior guard looked down awkwardly, kicking the ground a little.  "I hate this war... it's just so..."

"Bad."  Senior muttered.  "I didn't even think there would be one.  We were all doing so well, too..."

Derpy nodded.  "I remember it like it was yesterday."

"How old were you back then?"

Derpy faltered.  These ponies didn't know the past was, quite literally, only a day or two ago for her.  "F-five" was all she managed to say.

"Got a better memory than me."  He chuckled, then pulled something from a compartment in his armour; a packet of pink sugary cylinders.  "Here, have something to eat."

Derpy grabbed one of the candy sticks in her mouth and slowly chewed on it.  It was delicious and sweet, and something she didn't even realised she needed.

She smiled sadly, swallowing.  "Thank you."

Suddenly there was a shout from the rear of the train, and the familiar thunk of crossbows could be heard over the chugging of the locomotive.  The carriage shook violently as something landed on it, and the guards spun to the door, telekinetically drawing blades.

"What was that?"  Derpy squeaked.

The door was thrown open, almost off, and a large winged creature rushed in.  It, or she, was wearing tinted goggles and a bandanna around it's muzzle... beak... thing.  Derpy saw the purple eyeshadow, the colours of the eagle-headed lion thing and gasped.  "Gilda!"

"Shut it, dweeb!"  The griffon growled, grabbing the senior guard and throwing him out of the train screaming.

The junior guard bellowed loudly and swung his sword at the large beast.  Gilda dodged it easily, drawing what looked like a tiny hoofcannon with a strange trigger mechanism and pointing it at the guard.  A second blade swing knocked it out of her hands, sending it skidding to Derpy.  Gilda growled and drew a hefty knife, rushing forward, locking blades with the guard.

"Ohp!"  Derpy cried.  Both blade-wielders turned to face the grey pegasus, eyes widening.  She was standing up as best she could, the mini-hoofcannon in her mouth, pointed at the griffon.

"What are you doing, you idiot?!"  Gilda squawked.  "You don't even know what that does!"

Derpy glared into her eyes, not caring what the thing in her mouth did.  "Go ahay!"

"Don't make this harder on-"

"Ah 'aid go ahay!"  Derpy growled.

Gilda glared back, until she felt something sharp on her neck.  She looked down in horror at the young guard.

"You heard her.  Get going, and take your lackeys with you."

"You..."  Gilda hissed, then stepped back, sheathing her knife.  "At least give me my pistol back."

"So you can shoot us?  I don't think so.  Now get out before I make you."

Gilda growled and flew out, shouting orders at a group of others; ponies or griffons, it was hard to tell.  The guard turned to Derpy, and gently removed the pistol from her mouth.

"You just saved my life.  Thank you."  The guard smiled, then placed the pistol in a lockbox in the carriage.

Derpy just fell back to her haunches, not even believing what she just did.  Had she just saved pony's life?  All she was doing was scaring Gilda away, or trying to.  "Y-you're welcome..."

A voice called out from the side of the carriage, the sounds of galloping hoofbeats just audible.  The guard leaned out and laughed, pulling the ejected senior guard out.  "You're alive!"

"Takes more than that... to get rid of me..."  Senior panted, lying on the floor.  "Stupid... bandits..."

"You should have been here, the prisoner saved my life and got rid of that griffon."

Senior laughed.  "Well, that's new."

"So, what, do we reward her?"

"That's up for the Lieutenant to decide."  Senior panted, and then turned his gaze to Derpy.  "Thanks, kid."

Derpy, despite the pain in her hooves and heart, smiled.





The train finally stopped, throwing Derpy's head around a little.  She couldn't reach up to rub it, even if she tried hard enough.  The guards helped her up and escorted her into the streets of Canterlot.

Canterlot.  It didn't even look touched by the war.  All the majesty of the buildings remained, the trees were nice and green, and the smell of fancy restaurants filled the air.  Fancily-dressed mares and posh stallions walked across the street, looking rather pleased with themselves; almost as if they were untouchable by the war.  Derpy found herself loathing them more and more.

One mare walked up to the senior guard.  "Excuse me my good fellow, but do you know where the nearest post office is?"

The guard gave some simple directions, and the mare walked off without a thank you.  He muttered something rude under his breath.

The three proceeded across the unscarred streets.  Posters hung on nearly every wall; showing scenes of Nightmare Moon surrounded by vicious bat-like ponies, with words like STOP THE SHADOWY MENACE OF THE REPUBLIC!  JOIN THE CSEMF NOW! and other ludicrous things.  Derpy frowned; she had seen the Republic and they had treated her well.  They weren't batponies, they were just normal ponies who banded with Luna.

The guards turned a corner and within minutes they arrived at a gaol, its dark-bricked squareness looming over them.  Derpy looked up and gulped.

"B-big..."

"Don't worry; it looks much better on the inside."





Not by much.  Derpy thought to herself.

Within the minute of them entering, she had been placed into a cell on her own, near the entrance.  The cell looked like it had been recently cleaned, but it was cold and dark and small.  A single window was the only connection to the outside world, with shafts of moonlight poking through.  Derpy sighed.

She crawled to what looked like a makeshift bed and lied down on it, patting her hooves on it.  It was hard and cold and very uncomfortable, but better than sleeping on the uneven, stone floor.

She closed her eyes and tried to sleep.  After what seemed like a few hours, she finally felt a weight lift from her shoulders and she drifted into a pleasant sleep.
> Returning Home
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


What Went Wrong?
Chapter 7 - Returning Home






Derpy felt a hoof shake her gently.  She groaned and turned over, facing away from the pony nudging her.  She had just gotten into a good sleep, too...

"Miss Hooves?"

"Frrv mrr mnnrts..."

"Miss Hooves, it's me.  Sweetie Belle."

Derpy cracked open an eye.  "Whu...?"

A rather pretty young mare stood across from her, smiling gently.  She had a very light grey coat and a purple-pink mane, beautifully combed.  She looked very out of place in the prison.  "Miss Hooves, please, I need to talk to you."

Derpy sat up and rubbed her eyes; her glasses had fallen off in her sleep.  She fumbled around and found them, then put them back on.  "Sorry... I had a terrible sleep."

"I apologise."  Sweetie Belle said in a soothing voice.  "But this was the only way we could get you here without any suspicion."

"Right..."  Derpy yawned.

"I was told by the guards who escorted you that you protected them from Gilda's bandits."  She smiled.  "That was very brave of you."

"Thanks..."  Derpy sighed.  "So... what now?"

"Now?  You come with me and I'll answer any questions you need to know."

Derpy stood up and stabilised herself with a few wingbeats.  The white-coated mare led her out of the cell and led her across the prison block.  Most of the cells were empty, and in the few that weren't the prisoners all looked... sad.  The sort of sad that she had seen in the 'FPM'; the sadness of loss.  Sweetie Belle looked back at her.

"Prisoners of war... we treat them as well as we're allowed to, but I still don't think it's enough."

Derpy's eyes locked onto a young colt, sitting in the corner of his cell.  He looked like he was barely old enough for a cutie mark.  His eyes were distant and empty.

"Please, Miss Hooves, follow me."  Sweetie Belle said softly.  Derpy shook her head and reluctantly followed her, her mind still looking into the eyes of the young colt.





The two of them were lead into a rather decently-furnished room.  A painting of Celestia hung up on the wall, the Princess standing regally on the edge of a cliff during sunrise.  Or was it sunset?

"Please, sit down.  Would you like something to drink?"  Sweetie Belle asked, trotting up to a bench.

"Just water, please."  Derpy sighed, sitting down on a nice, soft chair.  Sweetie Belle walked over with a glass of water and a mug of gently steaming liquid in her magic aura.  Derpy grabbed the glass in her forehooves and took a sip.

"I'm sorry about Thunderlane..."  Sweetie Belle murmured.

"It wasn't your fault."  Derpy smiled.

"I'm a Lieutenant in the CSE.  I sent my troops into that siege.  As far as I know, one of my ponies could have killed him."

Derpy sighed.  "I know, but you didn't kill him yourself."

"True... but it does kinda feel like it."  Sweetie Belle took a sip from her mug, then exhaled slowly.  "But anyway... I'm sure you have some questions for me."

Derpy shook her head.  "I don't think so.  I just want to see my daughter, then Twilight, then get away from all of this..." she faded off.

"Please, just rest a moment.  You've been walking around a lot, and you've been shot recently."  Sweetie Belle took another sip of her drink.  "Caramel told m-"

A knock on the door.  "Excuse me a moment."  Sweetie Belle said, placing her mug on the coffee table.  She walked up to the door and opened it.  "Who is it?"

"Sweetie Belle, darling!" Another mare exclaimed, barging in.  "I've been worried sick about you!"

"Thanks, Rarity, but I'm fine."  Sweetie Belle hugged her sister.  "Why the sudden visit?"

"Oh, you have no idea how much I've been dying to see you... not to mention have another cup of your delicious tea."  Rarity smiled, then froze as her eyes found Derpy.  She stammered, her pupils becoming pinpricks.  "...my stars..."

"Oh, yeah, I also have a guest."  Sweetie Belle offered meekly, trotting to the bench and preparing her sister a drink.  "It's a long story."

Rarity walked up to Sweetie Belle, still in shock.  "Are you... I mean... is this Derpy?"

"Hi."  Derpy said, waving a hoof.

Rarity giggled nervously back, then turned to Sweetie Belle and whispered something in here ear.  Sweetie Belle retorted sharply in a similar fashion.  Rarity gasped quietly, before turning to face the pegasus.

"So, Derpy... um... how are you?"

Derpy raised a hoof and shook it slightly.  "Eh."  Rarity tried for a winning smile but probably it wasn't convincing enough.  She sighed, turning to her sister.

"Now, Sweetie Belle, I would like you to see some of my latest designs and provide some critiques."  She accentuated that last word, before telekinetically grabbing three mannequins from outside of the room.  Each was dressed in a fancy type of white and gold uniform, each bearing Celestia's cutie mark on the chest.  She beamed happily.

"Oooh, fancy."  Sweetie Belle muttered, levitating a cup of tea up to her sister.  "They look pretty good."

"I was up all night finishing them off."  Rarity said, almost maniacally, taking a sip of her drink.  "This one-" she shook one of the mannequins, with a orangey-red beret on its lifeless, featureless head "-is designed for Earth ponies or unicorns.  This one-” she shook another, and Derpy noticed it had a couple of holes where wings could poke through "-is for pegasi, and this one-” the third had a hole in the brim of the peaked cap "-is designed for lieutenants and above."  She paused for a second.  "The hole in the brim is optional, by the way."

"Wow."  Sweetie Belle said then walked up to the pegasus-friendly uniform as it was set down.  "But... aren't these a bit... conspicuous?"

Rarity looked at the white and gold uniforms, then back at Sweetie Belle.  "Well, we can't have ourselves looking as shabby and garish as the Republic, can we?"

"Rarity, their clothing is camouflaged for a reason..."

"It's still garish."  Rarity muttered, looking away and flushing in annoyance.

Sweetie Belle sighed.  "But it works.  Why don't you, I don't know, ask Twilight to provide you with some sort of invisibility or camouflage enchantment thingy for them?"

Rarity groaned.  "Twilight's been too busy with some other project to even come out of her laboratory and eat, let alone just say hi."

"What sort of project?"  Derpy asked.

"Something really complicated or very important.  The only way I've been able to talk with Twilight was through Spike or even the Princess."

"That reminds me, I've got to contact Twilight soon."  Sweetie Belle murmured.  "She'll want to hear about Derpy."

Rarity nodded, then her as her eyes fell on her dresses they widened.  She gasped.  "Ideeeaaa~!"

Derpy and Sweetie Belle exchanged glances.





Rarity stepped back and grinned uncontrollably.  "These new uniforms are absolutely marvellous!"

Sweetie Belle adjusted the peaked cap, frowning.  "I dunno, this hole in the cap is really weird."

Derpy found that the uniform fit perfectly on her, a testament to either the unicorn magic used to create it or Rarity's skills.  It was surprisingly comfortable, too, and her wings had fit through the holes easily.  She caught her reflection; she looked pretty cool in a deep red beret.  Her own body, though, looked messy and dirty.  She realised she hadn't had a shower for a very, very long time.

"Well, there is an option to remove it."  Rarity replied to her little sister, snapping Derpy's thoughts away.  "In case one does not have a horn."

"Um..."  Derpy murmured.  "While this is really comfortable, can I take it off?"  She smiled awkwardly.  "I don't want to dirty it up."

"Never fear, my dear, they are stain-resistant and self-cleaning."  She smiled.  "Keeps you looking nice and clean in battle."

Sweetie Belle groaned.  "It doesn't matter how self-cleaning these are if you don't have armour."

Rarity pondered.  "Perhaps I should put a light shield spell in these..."

"Or a heavy one."  Sweetie Belle suggested.  "Or just have the ability to put armour over or under it."

Rarity balked.  "Then how will others see one's rank?"

"Put it on the armour?  Make a coat that goes over it?  I dunno, but uniforms are not armour."

"Can I take this off?"  Derpy asked quietly, her words falling on deaf ears.

"Rarity, have you even been on a battlefield?"

"Um..."  Rarity faltered.  "I... uh..."

"Obviously not.  Well, I have, and I'll tell you this much, the last thing you worry about is your uniform."

Rarity sighed.  "Alright, I give.  You have the battle experience."  She looked up and smiled.  "These can be for wearing at the HQ!"

"Well, ok."  Sweetie Belle said.  "Just design a coat or a set of armour for when we are in battle."  She smirked.  "Besides, coats are pretty cool."

Rarity nodded, then after a brief but tight hug bid her farewells and trotted out of the room, the mannequins following.  Sweetie Belle sighed, her head lowering.

"Can I take this off now?"  Derpy asked, smiling awkwardly.  Sweetie Belle rolled her eyes, smiling.





Sweetie Belle suggested leaving the uniforms on.  It would allow Derpy to blend in better, she said.  Derpy felt weird in the crisp, clean uniform.  She really needed that shower.

As the two of them walked to Twilight's laboratory, they passed several young, uniform-clad ponies, each throwing a salute to them.  Sweetie Belle saluted back.  Derpy didn't, just stood there looking really awkward.  Not that anyone seemed to notice her anyway.

Sweetie Belle hesitated suddenly, Derpy slamming into her rump.

"Sergeant Major Rich."  She muttered.  "Report."

Three ponies walked up; a pink mare with a white/purple mane, dressed in a nice, clean, well-looked after (or just a new) uniform.  Another, a grey and silver pony, followed behind her.  The third was a light-beige unicorn with a curly orange mane, barely old enough to be in the military.

Rich didn't salute.  In fact, she had an air of superiority, as if others should salute to her.  "There's, like, nothing to report."

"Nothing to report, ma'am."  Sweetie Belle said in a low voice.

"What about the-” the grey one started, before a raised hoof stopped her.

"Shut up, Spoon."

Sweetie Belle raised an eyebrow.  "No no, go on."

"But-” Rich started.

"Diamond Tiara, I am the senior officer.  She is allowed to speak."

"It's... um... nothing, ma'am."  The grey mare said.

"No it wasn't!"  The orange-maned one shouted.  "It was a dragon!"

"A dragon?"  Sweetie Belle asked, shocked more than anything.
"Shut up, you!"  Diamond Tiara growled.

"Yeah, a dragon."  Spoon continued.  "We only just saw it fly overhead, but it was, like, huge!"

"Shut up!  I order you to shut up!"  Diamond frantically screamed, flailing her hooves at the two ponies.  Derpy just snickered.

"And I order them to continue."  Sweetie Belle calmly contributed, gesturing for the two ponies to continue.

"I think it was a green dragon."  The young beige one continued.  Derpy found herself seeing some similarities between her and somepony else... but who...?

"It was still huge and, like, looked nasty."  Spoon continued.

"Thanks for the report."  Sweetie Belle smiled.  "I'll make sure you're rewarded for your diligence."  She turned to Diamond Tiara.  "As for you, because you attempted to suppress important info..."

Diamond Tiara gulped.

"...I'll make sure you're punished."  And with that, she turned away and walked off.  Derpy followed, hearing Diamond's pathetic attempt at threats.  Sweetie Belle chuckled a little.

Derpy frowned.  "That young mare... who is she?"

"Pumpkin Cake."

Derpy froze.  The then muttered to herself, "Pound's sister..."

Sweetie Belle's face dropped.  "I know... Pumpkin's here while Pound's with the Republic.  It was just bad timing that made it that way."

"Bad timing?"

"I don't know exactly what happened, but..."  Sweetie Belle hesitated.  "She was thrown into the war because she had a skillset no-one could let pass up."

Derpy nodded.  Sweetie Belle shook her head.  "Anyway, come on.  Twilight will want to see you."





Spike stood outside of Twilight's room, leaning on the door looking completely and utterly bored.  "Twilight, come on.  You've been in there for days."

"It's important!"  Twilight growled through the door.  The sounds of sparks and electricity sounded, with a yelp following.

"You ok?"  Spike asked, as if this was the hundredth time he had.   Which, unbeknownst to Derpy, it was.

"Fine!"  Twilight replied.

Spike turned to see Sweetie Belle and Derpy trot up.  He stood straight and waved.

"Hey Spike."  Sweetie Belle chimed.  Spike was just a little bit taller than last Derpy remembered, his muzzle slightly longer and his whole form more wicked looking.  His legs were longer and thinner than before, and he looked less chubby.

"Hey Sweetie Belle.  Hey Derpy."  He replied, waving at the pegasus' direction.  Derpy waved back with a wing.

"Can I see Twilight?  I've got something important to tell her."  Sweetie Belle asked.  Before Spike could respond, another, more impressive voice called out from the other direction.

"I would like to see her as well."  Princess Celestia said, walking out from a turn in the corridor.  Following beside her was a tall white pony with a short blue mane and rather... impressive... horn.  Derpy blushed a little but if anyone noticed they didn't say anything.  Sweetie Belle saluted the two newcomers, whereas Derpy bowed to Celestia.

"At ease, lieutenant."  Celestia smiled.  Derpy looked up and stood up.  "So, I suppose you're here to talk to Twilight about Derpy's little time problem?"

Sweetie Belle nodded.  "Twilight said something about getting her back, apparently."

"So that's what this is about."  The stallion muttered.  "I just came here to see my sister again, but ah well."  Sister?  Derpy's eyes widened.  So that's who he was.

Celestia smiled.  "I've wanted to tell her to take a break once in a blue moon."  She slowed down slightly on the mention of moon.  Derpy could imagine why.  "She's been working dreadfully hard recently."

Spike turned and knocked on the door again.

"No, Spike, I am not coming out!"

"You have visitors!"

"Who?"

"Sweetie Belle..."  He counted on his fingers, a trait Derpy felt a certain mint-green mare would be jealous of.  "Celestia, Shining Armour and Derpy Hooves."

"Derpy Hooves?!"  Twilight yelled.  Immediately they heard papers flying, likely due to Twilight zipping up to the door.  She flung it right open, grinning maniacally.

"There you are."  Celestia smiled calmly, hoping to soothe Twilight.  It didn't work.  Twilight's eyelid twitched spasmodically, as she located Derpy.  Derpy gave a weak smile back, waving with her wing again.

"Derpy!  You're here!  Just as predicted, and only a few moments too soon!"  She giggled, dancing on the spot.  Shining and Sweetie Belle shared confused glances.  Celestia raised an eyebrow.  Derpy gulped.

"May we come in?"  Celestia asked, calmly.

"No!"  Twilight instinctively replied, then froze, blushed and then coughed awkwardly.  "I-I mean, sure.  Just don't touch anything, ok?"





Derpy found herself sitting on a chair while Sweetie Belle handed everyone drinks.  Derpy had opted for water again, Shining took a strong coffee and Celestia some tea.  Twilight had said no to a drink, and was still working on... whatever it was.  Derpy noticed it was very similar to the device which had sent her over here in the first place.  Seeing it filled her with a smidge of dread.

"So, Derpy, I don't mean to sound rude but have you... been busy... during your time here?"  Celestia asked, smiling.  Derpy felt calmer around her, but I guess if she wasn't a calming presence Equestria would be vastly different to what it was... fifteen years ago?  Today?  Stupid time travel.

"Oh.  Um... yeah, kinda.  Mostly a lot of travelling here and there.  Getting shot at wasn't fun, then hearing Thunderlane had died was pretty awful."  She looked away as she trailed off.

"A lot of ponies have lost something or someone thanks to my stupidity."  Celestia said, looking up to the ceiling; it displayed a mural of her and Luna happily helping Equestria in its early days.  "I lost my sister, and now she hates me..."

Derpy thought, her face scrunching up.  Did Luna actually hate Celestia?  Or did she just not like fighting her?

"Something troubling you, Miss Hooves?"  Celestia asked.

"I'm not sure Luna actually hates you..."

The monarch of the morning's eyes widened with a little bit of hope.  "You spoke with Luna?"

Derpy nodded.  "Not for long, though.  But she never actually said you were bad or anything."  She put a hoof to her chin.  "Not that I remember anyway."

"I see."  Celestia sighed.  "I try to do well for my subjects, but most ponies here are devoted to me and... well... treat me like a goddess."  She chuckled sadly.  "That, or Canterlot is the only place where viable trading is still taking place, and they want or need more money."  She shut her eyes.  "But... what the shattered remains of Equestria's governments have done to one another..."

Derpy looked up and thought she saw a tear coming from Celestia's eyes.  Sweetie Belle walked over and put a hoof on the Princess' back.  Shining just smiled.

"Well, I'm only really here because I'm a captain."  Shining added.  "I would have preferred to stay out of this, but my duties said otherwise."  He sighed.  "I'm going to be a father soon... I don't want my son or daughter growing up in this world..."

"Cadence is pregnant?"  Celestia asked.

"Yep."  Shining smiled.  "Has been for two months now.  Between my duties and trying to look after her, I have no time left to do anything."

"I could grant you some leave."  Celestia muttered.  "That will help, I'm sure."

"You would?"  Shining beamed.  "For how long?"

"As long as you need."  Celestia smiled, closing her eyes happily.  "If luck has it's way, I'm sure there'll be a brighter future in store for all of us."

"Thank you, Princess!"  Shining said, then rushed over to her and hugged her tightly.  After the initial shock of the suddenness of his affection, the Princess hugged him back.

"Aha!"  Twilight cackled.  "Done!  It's finally done!  Three months non-stop work - with toilet and food breaks and occasional naps - and I have finally finished!"

"Twilight?"  Celestia asked, only getting mad laughter in reply.

Shining Armour walked up to his sister, and then poked her on the shoulder.  Twilight stopped, then grinned sheepishly at her brother.  "Sorry, I got a bit... ok, a lot... carried away."

Derpy slid of the couch and onto her hooves, walking up to the massive sciency-looking thing.  "So... I have to be teleported again?"

Twilight nodded.  "I calculated that something in the teleporting matrix design had been slightly misaligned, and caused it to explode catastrophically.  Plus, I have removed most of the element of the other requiring thinking of where they wanted to go, as that may have been a extraneous variable..."

"So, in other words, I just stand in it and you zap me back?"

"In theory, yes."  Twilight grinned.

"In practice?"  Celestia asked, a look of concern on her face.  Twilight froze.

"Well... I haven't had a chance to test it out."

Derpy sighed.  This could be potentially dooming.

"But I've run simulations of it, and I'm 98.555782%, rounded, it'll work."  Twilight offered.

"So you're 1.444218%, rounded, it won't?"  Celestia frowned, shocking Derpy with her sudden ability to even calculate that within a second.

"Um... well... yes, but I'm sure 1.444218% is very unlikely."

Derpy frowned, looking down to the ground.  She had to get back... and 1. 444something percent really wasn't very likely.  "Alright, I'll do it."

Silence.

"You will?"  Sweetie Belle asked, completely stunned.

"I will."  Derpy looked up, posing confidently.  "But I have one request."

Twilight looked around.  "Uh... we really should get this done as soon as possible."

"Allow her her request, my most faithful student."  Celestia said, and then turned to Derpy.  "So, what do you request?"

"I want... I want to see my daughter."





Celestia led Derpy through the corridors, heading to Dinky's office - apparently she was an assistant to Twilight but had the day off, most likely due to current events.  Derpy felt her chest grow heavier with every step, her heartbeat increasing.

"I'm sure Dinky would like to see you."  Celestia offered.  Derpy nodded, but she couldn't shake the feeling that she might not want to.

They reached what looked like a small room.  Derpy could here the scratching of a writing tool on paper, the faint twinkling of magic.  Celestia knocked on the door.

"Yes?"  A rather young sounding mare called out from behind it; Derpy recognised it as Dinky, but only barely.

"It's me, Celestia."  Celestia replied.  "You have a visitor."

"S-sorry, Princess!"  Dinky answered, and after a series of noises and irregular hoofbeats, the door was opened.

"Hello Dinky."  Derpy said, quietly.  Dinky's eyes tracked the noise and widened, her eyes becoming pinpricks.  "S-sorry I haven't been around."

"Sorry...?"  Dinky quivered.  "Sorry?!"

Celestia took a step back.

"You disappeared for fifteen years and all you can say is sorry?!"  Dinky growled, scowling at her mother.

Derpy tried to speak, but her voice caught in her throat.  What could she say?

"You missed my birthday party, you missed my graduation, you missed me getting cutie mark!"  Dinky was now less growling and more shouting.  "You abandoned me when I needed you!"

"I..."

"Mum, I'm older than you now!"  Dinky screamed, her eyes becoming moist.  "I waited for you for ten years!"

Derpy sighed.  "I... I didn't mean to be gone so long..."

Dinky balked, growling.  "That doesn't change anything... I guess it’s lucky Thunderlane looked after me for that time..."

Derpy looked down, closing her eyes.  "I guess... I'm still sorry... but... Twilight says she has a way to fix it."

Dinky sighed, looking away.  "I hope she can..."

Derpy looked up at her daughter and smiled sadly, then enveloped her in a hug.  After a second, Derpy felt Dinky's hooves wrap around her.  "I promise I won't ever abandon you again."

"You'd better not."  Dinky said, but without hostility.





Derpy and Dinky had hugged for about fifteen minutes, making up for all the hugs they had missed out on.  Celestia had politely let them bond, stepping away for a while to grab some cake for them.  After the sugary treat and yet another walk, they stood in front of Twilight's teleother device.

"What took you so long?"  Twilight asked.

"I had fifteen years of hugs to catch up on."  Derpy said.  Twilight nodded and gestured towards the centre of the device.  Derpy took a step forward into the device, looking around with a bit of concern.

"Uh, Twilight?"

"Yes?"  The lavender mare replied, using her magic to flip a few switches.

"Will this hurt?"

"No more than last time."  Twilight frowned.  "Did it hurt last time?"

Derpy frowned, trying to remember.  "Only when I hit the floor of my room."

"So, that's where you ended up..."  Twilight muttered, throwing one more switch.  The device started humming again.  "What were you thinking last time?"

"Huh?"

"There was an error in thought last time.  What were you thinking about?"

Derpy put a hoof to her chin, tapping it.  "Uh... I can't remember exactly.  I think something about going home plus the thought of Dinky being grown up and stuff."  She blushed a little in embarrassment.  "I guess I was just panicky and excited about Dinky's birthday."

Twilight slammed one hoof on the other.  "So that's what went wrong!"  As she walked around, mouthing off stuff about brainwaves affecting the teleportation coordinates, combined with the misaligned component, and all sorts of science Derpy only half understood.  Twilight then cast a beam of magic into an open compartment of the device, letting purple-pink bolts of electricity course around the device.  The thing made a loud, deep hum, interspersed with the crackling of the lightning.  Derpy took a few cautionary steps away from the sparks.

"Twilight!"  She cried over the cacophony.  "Are you sure this will work?!"

Twilight looked at the device, slipping on a set of tinted goggled.  "I have no idea!"

Celestia, Sweetie Belle and Shining donned their own set of goggles.  Celestia's voice was quite audible over the noise.  "I thought you said you knew this would work!"

"I know, but I'm not sure the device will hold!  Quick, help me stabilise the columns!"  Twilight rushed to the column she was standing on and held it in place with her hooves.  The other three grabbed the other columns, trying to hold them in place.

"Seventy-three percent power gained!"  Twilight called out, looking at a monitor connected to the device only by the power cable.  "Seventy-seven!  Seventy-nine!"

Derpy frowned.  "Anything I can do to help?!"

Twilight looked around, then smiled.  "The limiter switch!  Turn it to seventy-five!"

"Is that a good idea?!"  Shining called out, eyes closed.

"Well... no!  But if we want this to go any faster, we have to get more power in!"  She glanced at the monitor again.  “Eighty-two, and stable!"

"How much do we need?!"  Sweetie screamed, her voice almost unhearable.

"One hundred!"

"Can't one of you use your magic?!"  Derpy asked loudly.

"If we add more magic directly it could unbalance something!  Just do it!"

Derpy nodded, then using her wings zipped out of the centre of the device and rushed to the switch.  It was currently resting at fifty.  Steeling herself up, she grabbed the handle with her mouth and pulled it down.  Unfortunately, she overestimated how tough it was, and dragged it all the way to one hundred.  "Uh oh..."

"Eighty-nine!  Ninety one!"  Twilight kept calling out.  "Get back into the device!  Now!  Ninety five!"

Derpy zipped back in.  "It's at one hundred!  I went too far with it!"

"Oh no!"  Twilight shrieked.

"What?!"  Sweetie Belle asked.

"The rig might overload!"

"Whoops, my bad."  Derpy chuckled nervously.

Twilight glanced back at the monitor "Ninety-nine!  One hundred and one!"

The teleother device started shaking violently, the electricity sparking more frequently and more powerfully.  Derpy opened her mouth to speak, but the magical energy zapped her and tore her body apart.





This time, the teleporting actually hurt.  It felt like all of her nerves were on fire, and she felt herself scream even though she couldn't hear it.  And while it only lasted an instant, it certainly wasn't unforgettable.

The instant her body appeared in the material realm again, she fell down, smacking into something solid and flat.  It took her a moment for her mind to right itself, and she peered up, her eyes rolling around.

"Derpy?"  She heard a younger version of a mare she had just been talking to.  She blinked and shook her head, seeing Twilight Sparkle looking down at her.  "Are you alright?"

"Y-yeah, I'm ok..."  Derpy stood up, then realised her glasses were missing.  And her bags.  And everything except herself.  Weird.

"Oh good.  I had readings that something went wrong and I might have messed up something and-” Twilight inhaled, and then sighed.  "You were gone for seven minutes."

"Seven minutes?"  Derpy asked, a little confused.  "Wasn't I gone for..."  Her voice trailed off as she realised something; future Twilight's spell had worked.  "Never mind."

"Well, anyway."  Twilight interjected, telekinetically bringing up a piece of parchment and a quill.  "How was it?"





Derpy had, after a short interrogation by Twilight, decided to visit Rainbow Dash.  She looked all over, and even had to ask Pinkie.  Pinkie pointed up and she spotted Dash resting on a cloud.

"Hey, Rainbow Dash!"  Derpy called out, flying up to meet her.

"Oh, hey Derpy."  Dash said without seeming to actually give a toss, not even looking in her direction.  "What's up?"

"Just came back from Twilight's experiment."

"Oh?"  Dash impassively muttered.

"Yeah, it was weird.  But everything's right now."

Dash just nodded.

"Dash?"

"What?"

"Why did you ask Twilight to test it out on me?"

Dash's eyes opened, and Derpy flew over, staring right at her.  Her mane was not only singed from the return, but tangled and messy.  Her eyes were slightly reddened from her previous emotional busts, and she did not look happy.

"Well... I... um..."

Derpy raised an eyebrow.

"I was a little annoyed at you for dropping a thundercloud on top of me last week, so... y'know..."

Derpy sighed.  "And you didn't think I might have been killed, or sent fifteen years into the future where Equestria was in a civil war or something?"

"Well... I did, but... it was too late."  Dash looked down, then back up sadly.  "Sorry..."

Derpy smiled, then hugged Dash.  "It's ok; at least I wasn't gone for long."

"So... what happened?"

"I'll... I'll tell you later, ok?"  Derpy grinned then flew off to her home for a shower.





It was weird returning home after seeing it fifteen years in the future.  Everything was so clean, so unmarred by war or time.  The water was nice and refreshing, the unicorn magic-enchanted showerhead giving the water just the right temperature.  Normally she never had a shower longer than five minutes, but she had been, almost quite literally, Tartarus and back, so she deserved a nice half-hour clean-off.

She emerged from the shower room looking much cleaner, smelling a lot nicer, and smiling happily.  She was about to exit the house when a tiny light-pink unicorn trotted in.

"Hi Mummy!"  She chimed.

Derpy blinked, then picked herself up from the floor.  "Hello, my little pony!"

Dinky froze and blinked.  She wasn't used to her mum being so... happy about seeing her.  Not that she minded: a happy mummy is better than a sad mummy.  She bounded towards Derpy and hugged her.  Derpy responded with a tight, but not crushing, hug.

"How was school?"  Derpy asked.  Dinky couldn't know about what happened.  She was too young to even understand it.

"Awesome!  We made papier mache today; I made a little you!"  She giggled, then heard her mother sniffing and she frowned.  "Mummy?"

"Y-yes, Dinky?"  Derpy brokenly said.

"Why are you crying?"  As soon as she asked, the hug became tighter.

"Mummy's had a hard day...” was all Derpy could reply.  "I-I'll tell you when you're old enough..."

Dinky nodded.  "Ok.  D'ya wanna see my work?"

"Of course."





It was eight thirty.  Dinky had gone to bed for the night, and Derpy was sitting in the lounge room all alone, looking at the lone, crude, hoof-made statue of herself.  She couldn't say it was accurate, but she didn't care, it was made with love.  She smiled sadly.

Everyone else thinks I've been gone for only seven minutes... She sighed.  I can't really speak about my adventures with anyone.  Not now.

She looked up at the clock, its cartoon muffin character grinning cheerfully.  The minute hand moved a section; now it was 8:31.

I can't say I enjoyed my trip, but I did learn a lot.  About Dash and Fluttershy... about my other friend... about Thunderlane.

Her eyes widened.  She remembered what future Thunderlane had said to her right after they had kissed.

"Sorry, but I've been wanting to do that for eighteen years."

Thunderlane must have had a crush on her for three years now.  And, Derpy had to admit, he was a pretty cute guy.  Especially how he (usually) got a bit shy around her.

She stood up, smiling.  She had one more pony to talk to for the day.





The sun was almost completely gone from the sky, it's last sliver of light reflecting off Derpy's glasses.  She had once again asked where Thunderlane was; apparently he was just bucking away some last clouds.  She found him, silhouetted by the sun, kicking his legs into some clouds, each dissipating into mist as he did so.  After the last one, he alighted onto the ground and wiped his brow.

"Hey Thunderlane!"  Derpy called out, startling the ebony pegasus.

"Geez, Derpy, don't scare me like that."

Derpy giggled.  "Sorry."

"I-it's fine."  Thunderlane turned to face her, and his eyes widened.  "Woah."

"What?"

"I've never seen you wear glasses before."  Thunderlane commented, pointing a hoof lazily at the spectacles on her nose.

"Not even during high school?"  Derpy asked in reply.  Thunderlane shook his head.

"Guess I was too busy studying."

Derpy trotted up to him, smiling happily.  "So, how's your day been?"

"Oh, my day?"  Thunderlane blinked, surprised she would even have asked.  "It's been... busy.  Mostly running around for Dash trying to get all the pegasi ready for next week."

"What's next week?"  Derpy asked, cocking her head.

"Massive thunderstorm to make up for this weekend's sunny days.  I'm surprised you haven't heard about it."

"I've been... busy."  Derpy sighed.

"Work?"

"Nah, I had the day off.  Just... had to do an experiment over at the Library."

Thunderlane nodded.  "Twilight?"

"Yeah."

Thunderlane turned to her, a look of concern on his features.  "If you want to talk about it, I'm right here."

Derpy blinked, then nodded, gesturing with a wing for him to follow.





"I did what?!"  Thunderlane gasped, before Derpy shushed him, pointing to Dinky's room.

"Yeah..."  Derpy whispered.

"Geez, what would have possessed hi- I mean, me, to do something like that?"

"Apparently you had had a crush on me for eighteen years."

"That long, huh?"  Thunderlane frowned.  "Yeah, I can see how that would have made things interesting."

Derpy nodded, leaning back and looking up at the roof.  "Though that raises another question."

"Oh?"

"I was sent fifteen years into the future."

Thunderlane's eyes widened as his face turned a scarlet mixed with his normal dark grey.  Derpy didn't need to finish speaking for him to realise what she was going to say.  "Oh, um..."

Derpy looked back at him, even if he was looking away.  "Do you really like me?"

"Well, yeah, you're a nice pony and a great friend..."

Derpy leaned forward, looking at him.  His gaze drifted to her, prompting him to look even further away.  "What?"

"I mean, do you really like me?"

"Um..."

Derpy stood up, trotted over, and sat next to him.  "I'm sorry, I'm just..."

Thunderlane sighed.  "I know, you're curious.  I'll be honest..."  He stopped, breathing in a few times, then back out again.  "I do."

Derpy smiled softly, wrapping a wing around him.  Thunderlane turned to face her, still blushing.  "Derpy..."

"Well... I've got a bit of a crush too."  She softly replied.  "I never noticed it before, even if everypony else did... I remember Carrot Top telling me."

"You... you have a crush on me too?"  Thunderlane blinked.

Derpy didn't respond.  Not in the conventional way.  Instead, she lightly pecked the stallion's lips, her own face becoming scarlet, much like how Thunderlane's blush grew more.  She pulled back, grinning sheepishly.  Thunderlane smiled, then leaned forward and, grabbing her neck lightly with his forehooves, brought them into a much more passionate kiss.





"Ewww."  Dinky murmured to herself, hearing the wet, sloppy noises of her mum and Thunderlane kissing.  It was only to be expected she was not a fan of these things.  She retreated back under her blanket, and grabbing the toy ponies in her hooves, resumed her secret playing.

What mummy didn't know wouldn't hurt her.






THE END